"My love"
"My dearest"
"Precious girl"
What if I cried. What if I burst into tears and just openly started weeping. What then.
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imo it will always be a million times more cringe and insufferable to be an adult who actively makes fun of people who have harmless interests than it is to be an adult who is just really into cartoons or something idk
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this is going to sound really fucked up but i just need to say it i think.
I never realized that people could actually care. I always thought that the depictions of friendship in movies and TV shows were over-the-top portrayals, and weren't things that actually happened. This was then exacerbated by the fact that my entire life I always wanted people to just Know How I Was Feeling like they do on TV and I found out that that's Not How It Works. I always thought I was naive for caring so much about my friends and for doing nice things for them out of the blue, and I always resented myself for resenting my parents for not doing more for me as a child.
So when I got to uni, and my friends started caring about me and asking if I was ok when I looked sad and doing nice things for me, I didn't know what to do with myself. It was the nicest thing anyone had ever done for me in a long time. When I was staying with a friend, and she said that she left the window open in the room I was going to be staying in because I liked it to be cold when i sleep, I bluescreened. I didn't know how to respond. It is quite literally one of the nicest things anyone had ever done for me. No one had ever paid that much attention to the things I liked. Every year on my birthday it was either a gamble if I would get something I actually wanted from my parents (spoiler alert: I was often disappointed) or I would just have to straight up tell them what I wanted. I got accustomed to the latter, and now I don't mind, but receiving two gifts from friends about languages this year made me realize that I could have it so much better.
And don't even get me started on online friends. I sort of thought that everyone was lying about them? Or that it was something unattainable, and reserved only for God's Chosen Favorites or something. But no, there are little people in my phone who care about me. They legitimately care about me as much as I care about them. I've been nervous to ask them about their well-being because I'm still nervous about being naive and getting a wake-up call that no one cares again, but after being told that they were worried about me when I overslept, I think i should know that I'm in the clear. And that's not even including all the times they tell me to go to bed when it's late, and when they ping me about things I may enjoy or things I was involved in.
All this is to say I guess that I'm touched that people remember my existence. It makes me feel good to be wanted. I will be eternally grateful to both my irl and online friends who made me realize that just because my parents or my friends from home didn't care enough to remember what I like or to go out of their way to do nice things for me, it doesn't mean that no one will. I need to step up and do more for you guys. I trained myself to push down my desire to help and check in with people because I thought I was betting on something that I'd never get in return, but now I know I can.
Thank you all, and I love you 💚
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i saw in your "describe your accent" post you deride people using the term 'general american' to refer to their accent, but that is actually a linguistic term for the american accent that originated in the midwest and became the default accent of news/broadcasting, which in turn a lot of people speak especially if they don't come from areas with established regional diversity. Its label is generally used when comparing large groups of people in a study, for example comparing people from the US to the UK when you are not concerned with region-specific differences.
Also, just as a note, region alone does not define what accent you have, accent varies by class, race, gender, ethnicity, religion, age, sexual orientation etc. and using dismissive language to talk about how people self-identify their accent is kinda a shitty move, even if you may think you're punching up.
hi I made that post when I was 13 . I have . gotten this ask 600 times
edit: also like not to feel the need to explain myself further or whatever but in the multiple years since making that post I've like. become so invested in language that i am seriously considering figuring out a way to study semantics as a, like, sustainable career. I promise I understand what words mean more than I did in middle school.
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The survivor’s guilt of surviving and beating an addiction so many people don’t. I beat the statistics even when it was deemed close to impossible because I fought so hard for my sobriety and freedom. I fought with everything in me, knowing it was literally life or death. It feels absolutely awful knowing how many people pass from unintentionally doing fentanyl because they were lied to and bought laced substances.. they didn’t even know. Yet I did it every day knowingly (after a while, didn’t know at first what I was doing) every hour or so for a few years and I’m somehow still here. I feel like so many people who passed from just horribly unfortunate circumstances who were lied to deserve to be here while I do not. It’s a difficult feeling to deal with and I don’t know if I will ever understand why I was chosen to keep living when so many other people weren’t. It hurts my heart :(
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2023 is gonna be the year i start allowing myself to buy 'disability aids'
things that may not seem practical but will greatly improve the ease of which i'm able to tackle everyday tasks
things that i may not have looked into because 'those are for people more sensitive/disabled than I am'
things that make my routines easier to follow or easier to build habits that seemed like monumental tasks
this is the year im gonna actually be gentle with myself
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Hi 👉👈 I don’t have a lot to say, I just wanted to hi give you from across the room because I followed you for P3 but it turns out you and I share a ton of fandoms and I just think that’s really super neat.
You get a good grade in fandom taste 💖
WAVES HI!! thank you for the follow and message, it makes me happy to hear that you've enjoyed seeing the other media i've reblogged stuff of! P3 is definitely something i hold close to my heart, but i have lots of media i'm full of love for too! so thank you for appreciating it, i hope you enjoy your stay! 🥺💙
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I love how "have the day you deserve" has been invented as the new (albeit kinda corny) way to say "I hope you experience mind-altering horror and agony beyond your comprehension" without actually saying it
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(ooc. also one more thing before I disappear for a bit: like everyone else, I am hungrily reading every ☕ meme that skitters across my dash. I love them all.
And, from what I’ve seen, I also love how people are agreeing that Jupiter/Eris’s tea is just...universally terrible for you. Sweet and innocent at first, but then an oh god what the hell am I drinking-type aftertaste. Actual poison. Nailed it. 😇
Just wanted to say thanks to all the drink critics for bringing the silliest smile to my face. Whenever I’ve gotten a chance to sneak a look at the dash, this meme has me thriving...unlike the unfortunate people who took too many sips of the Jupitea!! Sorry not sorry...!!)
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