#ok since it's so long i'll tag

[shoyoist]

I’VE BEEN SUMMONED DID I HEAR KARASU?? pls he’s so precious to me 🥺🫶 he’s such a little shit i feel it in my bones. (my fave trope with him is def academic rivals to *wink wonk* more but regardless) you totally have one of those relationships where you just playfully roast each other and purely communicate in jabs. you’d think he actually hates you, but if anyone else talks shit about you he’s quick to brutally cut them down bc “‘m the only one who gets to badmouth you, kay, my sweet little nemesis?” he’d TOTALLY call you shit like that to piss you off i wanna kick him with my mouth. “my precious headache. my loveliest irritation. my most beloved torment.” it’s never your name, only my, my, my and whatever he decided to annoy you with that day. and you’re confused, because you know him in a very specific context due to the nature of your whatever-ship, but you don’t actually know him because you’ve never once had a serious conversation with him ever. and you think it’s time you change that. “if you’re free this weekend, let’s get milkshakes. my treat.” and karasu already has that permanent smirk curving on his mouth. “what’s this, my prettiest groupie? that desperate for company?” “if you keep being an ass i’ll invite someone else on a date.” and for the first time, you’re able to knock that smirk right off his face and render him into a wide-eyed, flustered mess. because he’s like oh. oh. a date. you’re actually serious. and he’s liked you for so long he doesn’t know what to do with himself, or his arms, but he knows he’s blushing profusely and you look all smug, but for once he’ll let it pass because he’s been horrendously and painfully flirting with you for the past year and holy shit you just asked him on a date. he’s a dork underneath all that sass and brains i KNOW HE IS

DIZZY DIZZY DIZZY <3333 guhh you do not know how much i enjoy academic rivals to lovers i eat that shit up so hardd and god with karasu it's even better. when he started calling you things like "my sweetest inconvenience" it started off as a joke. he enjoyed the way your brows knitted together at the sound of his voice, the irritated twist of your lip and he loves when you quip back.

but as it carries on, he realizes that while he's been teasing you through the my, my, my game, he's started to truly desire you for himself. he wants to call you his. you're mine. he wants it. wants it more than anything. imagine a rivals to fwbs plot where after he's realized his feelings, you get heart broken by the person you love, and he makes himself available to you as a vice, to vent out your frustrations on and to help you feel good.

he can handle it, he thinks. he's smart, has control over himself. he'll be fine.

but as he cups your face in his palm, grazing your cheek with his thumb, looking into your tear-filled. discontented eyes as he says, "'m sorry 's how it turned out for ya, my sweet." he stuns himself with the fact that he didnt add any more to it. my sweet.

my sweet what? everything, he thinks later, after you're gone and he's all alone in his bed again. arms crossed behind his head, the sheets bunched up around him smelling of you. you're my sweet everything.

and he wishes so badly for you to feel the same about him. maybe he cant handle it, after all.

[foxaoxarts]

BEE KISS TOMORR- *dead* /j

If anyone wants to watch me drawing this like a little victorian child then the timelapse is below the cut 🤣

(FLICKER WARNING. It's all through out so be careful!👍 )

[herefortheships]

Ok from glimpses of the cancelled BJ goes Hawaiian script, plus clips I've seen from the cartoon, and now the sequel, Betelgeuse and Lydia always seem to have a scene (or scenes; might have been more than one in the cartoon) dancing together, except in the first movie. But all the media that has come after has had them dance together.

So I fully expect another dance scene in the final movie. I think dancing is just part of the characters' aesthetic. 💚

[queen0fm0nsterz]

I think the way the Lady and the Thin Man became a lot more enjoyable to me as a duo when I stopped believing Six to be the Lady needs to be studied in a lab

[svtskneecaps]

thank you for bearing with my purgatory posting and i'm also glad to see i'm not the only one who still has this fungus eating away at my brain matter. seeing other purgatory posting in the tag makes me feel better lmfao.

i'm not done btw, posting will (probably) continue as i revisit vods. wanted to extend a thanks in the interim, since i know how contentious the event was in the moment. i kinda thought the general consensus was most people hated thinking about it, but there's been a weird amount of engagement and yknow other people talking. makes me happy to know i'm not alone here!

[farrenlux]

choose ur healer medic?

[cat-of-starlight]

tfw you are trying to Limbus Pull but the game's only Bonus Units™ are the ones that freak you out/irritate you lmao whoops

[mwagneto]

the fucking DAYS I've been having and will continue to have. literally non stop emotional rollercoaster good lord. like i knew wednesday morning - friday evening would be insane but holy SHIT I've aged like 3 years in the past 2 days and im not even through the worst of it. and i have to do all of it on basically 0 sleep

[fuckyeahyukiharu]

yOU ALL IM LAUGHING SO HARD

The archive is still there too, and all those fans who created works in the past still deserve some attention too, so please check out the archive if you haven't in a while and if you're also missing Tsuritama!!

Also, if you're interested, please check out my YukiHaru A.M.V \o/ (Made a few years back for YukiHarus shared birthdays specifically!)

{All I did was reblog some old gifs I missed to keep blog active, but I'm glad if people still appreciate this blog existing!!!}

(I may also have another A.M.V. or two planned for future years, if I can finish them in decent time!)

[portokali]

here's another tag game cause @pinknoisemp3 is a real one and tagged me to share 9 books i wanna read in 2023!! it's a game ive been tagged in before so pls don't take offense i never did it when you tagged me, i always meant to 🙏🙏

tagging some besties i talk abt books w but no pressure! @quillsand @soupbi @pherelpis @mousmoula @catboypranparakulisaro @darkside-cookies @byrons @teabox and anyone else who wants to!

[wheucto]

[spacedlexi]

and what the more nuanced opinions about s*yloy?

censoring the ship name 💀 ive been trying to avoid all the post-burning shores drama that seems to be happening in the horizon fandom... ive seen some Nasty stuff getting thrown around and im not just talking about the usual gamer-homophobes (those im unfortunately used to by now)

i think overall theyre cute!! their relationship in this dlc is about how aloy is Truly evolving to accept people into her life on a Deep and Personal level. and i am NOT saying that she doesnt also care deeply for her current cast of friends (i think she might even have Feelings for some of them shes not letting herself be aware of (and im talking since ZD)). but its established in forbidden west that aloy has trouble connecting to people on that deep level, and she more often slips off into the night on her own than choosing to stick by them long term. she cares for them, she'll always help them, but something seems to keep scaring her off

the end of the dlc has aloy saying the idea of a home and tribe has always scared her since she grew up so disconnected from the nora. her development throughout FW (although i had issues with the writing and pacing of it) is about her putting down those walls and Truly letting people into her life. and seyka, being so similar to herself in so many ways yet having a positive relationship with her tribe, is kind of the perfect storm for this new aloy. her feelings are new and clumsy and she stumbles over herself. she doesnt always seem as cool and collected as she usually is and it sometimes seems to even throw her off. its cute!

i dont necessarily have any problem with Them. my problems more so were related to the execution of the writing and pacing of the dlc as a whole. and those problems stem back to the writing and pacing problems ive had since forbidden west... they just kinda got caught in the crossfire a bit (as did some of the FW companions when i first played through but have since warmed up to more). i went back and rewatched my friends stream of it and i found myself less frustrated than i was when we first went through it, but there were still a few moments here and there (between them and in the overarching plot in general) that just made me go 🤨 the execution was messy or weak or strange at times but again thats not just a dlc problem for me. i can at least appreciate the intention of what they were Trying to do with aloy and seyka. and as a plus they hit a number of tropes i really like

i think what bothered me more was the way guerrilla marketed her? its weird because they boasted about how "special and unique" she was when i feel she shares a lot of qualities that aloys other companions also have (down to c-cast characters like ikrie and nakoa). like.. i LIKE all of these characters for these similar qualities! it was just weirdly disrespectful to their own cast? i dont think that was their intention but it was... interesting

especially since i believe this experience with seyka is Massively important for aloy moving forward in regards to her relationships. aloy at the end of the dlc after her time with seyka is Completely Ready to accept what her idea of "home" is, and she realizes thats the connections shes made with the people around her. i really hope seyka gets to escape the dlc and join up with the cast in Horizon 3 (i was already disappointed when ikrie didnt make a reappearance). but since the dlc ended in flashpoints where you could accept or reject her, i Definitely believe this implementation will return in Horizon 3 with our cast of companions (not every aloy chose to kiss seyka so some aloys are returning to base single (but seemingly ready to mingle)). in the past when these flashpoints have come up (like with avad in both ZD and FW) aloy always seems resistant in some way even if you Do choose the heart option. but seyka is evidence that aloy really IS ready for that level of commitment post-BS. and since these are still choices tied to flashpoints, your aloy can do whatever she wants! the point is that regardless of any romance, shes ready to accept her friends as her Tribe

[lusalemaart]

art dump continued

[youremyonlyhope]

I really should know better than to watch dumb romcoms while I'm 90% sure I'm ovulating.

This time it was Netflix's Love in the Villa trying to make me cry.

[mathmusicreading]

Blog(ger) Shift

I am, so weird and bad about original posting and about reblogging and about saving things on Tumblr and that's why my blog has been mostly inactive or the lurking consumer type. But I don't want my fears about putting myself out there, being seen and known, articulating myself well vs. having been told my whole life I'm too wordy and opinionated vs. not managing to articulate myself well enough to justify being verbose and passionate, etc. to continue to control me so much.

So for my new specific-interest sideblog that I'm not locking, I hope it being themed will help me with making more original posts and reblogging, and I'm publicizing that here to push myself and also welcome interaction.

RIP to my other public specific-interest sideblog and the fandom sideblog I took over for someone that I didn't take further and to my private sideblogs that were meant to make me reblog and save and say stuff because they would be personal and just for me. I still would like to make those happen and reblogging and posting things that matter to me here, and oh my heart for the content ideas I haven't been working on, but they're pipedreams with how I'm (not) managing my life and I keep kicking those cans down the road.

To the person who I developed a real relationship with as a beta but who by now I probably count as having disappeared on with how long it's been and my not coming back to explicitly say I still can't help and don't know when I can, I am so sorry. I'm being a coward languishing in hoping I can tell you soon that I can get back into beta-ing for you and talking, but that's turned into me not talking to you because I'm waiting to be able to say something positive. Hopefully my vaguing here can help push me into talking to you, or at least this is here for you to read if you happen to see it; and I want you to know you absolutely can talk to me, can call me out, and if you're so gracious as to still want to be friends with me and just chat despite my dropping being your beta, I'm here for you and still want to be your friend even if I don't know if I'll have the spoons to be a good one and I know my saying that preemptively isn't apology or justification enough.

Honest assessment, I'm going to curse and say my living situation and work have both become even more of a shitshow, and with those things in mind I can't begin to imagine handling a real project until basically literally a year from now.

Which segues back into the main topic of this post. My goal isn't to have my new sideblog be like an active mainblog nor to abandon this blog—people interested in that blog can and should still interact with me here given how primary vs. secondary blogs on Tumblr work, and in terms of using that blog to help make me be a better Tumblr user, I think I should make certain original posts here and reblog them there as opposed to them being original there. With my mental-emotional and time resources, I want that blog to be "active" for a given definition of active, but really I think I should see my objective as "clear out tabs and likes and photos and lists and notes and drafts, etc. from the last four months" by saving stuff there, as opposed to my goal being the original posts I want to make there, and actually my long-term goal should be to use that momentum to do the same for older digital and physical storage that hasn't been lost or stolen. In my failure to be an interesting person, do I at least manage to be fascinating as a basket-case? Ha. But, also, as expressed above the Read More, the exercise of my danmei/Chinese sideblog is supposed to be a foray into me allowing myself to be an interesting person.

[sgkjd]

psych institutions should be awarded for being the most unfriendly places for nd and mentally ill folk. funnily enough. do they not know what demographic uses their services?