#ok now how do i fit his weird relationship with ava in here and how much his death fucked her up even more than she was

[tinypaperstar]

throws this weirdo at u

(once again thanks to @shakingparadigm for the profile template :))

Nero was 26 when he died during his performance on Alien Stage.

If he were still alive (during Ava's season), he'd be 30.

His speaking voice is on the lower side though he can reach really high notes when singing!

Listen to his playlist here <3

He shares a guardian with Ava; though he's 4 years older than her, she's been around Nova longer. Originally a pet of a middle class alien, Nero was supposed to be put down for causing a fire in public (out of morbid curiosity lmao - the beginning of many similar incidents) but luckily (?) he managed to catch Nova's eye who promptly took care of it and took him off his previous owner's hands for a hefty sum of money.

Nero LOVES the thrill. He's not scared of getting into danger, anger any authorities or getting heavily punished for his misbehaviour. Some might even say he is looking forward to it. That's why even during his last moments on stage he was seen grinning from ear to ear while watching his opponent's points surpass his.

Fortunately for Nova, the aliens see Nero's personality as quirky and mischievious and he even has a fanclub that keenly follows the news about his latest "antics".

He wouldn't outright hurt anyone but his actions may or may not have caused headlines like "2 dead, 15 injured" ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

That's why he usually wears his collar outside of performances and there are extra guards and security measures when he's on stage.

Also, his tongue piercing? self-made. Nova wouldn't let him have one since it could compromise his singing so he did it himself- that's why when he asked for a lip piercing, they compromised with a fake one.

When he dies, his guardian called him a disappointment for losing despite always causing so much trouble.

[allie1804-fan]

New Beginnings (Chapter 10)

1  2 3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10  11  12

New Beginnings Baby Drabble

New Beginnings Baby Drabble No2

Warnings: Mentions of babyloss

Emily sat at an outside table at the Jinya Ramen bar, waiting for Keanu to join her for lunch. Afterwards they would have an appointment with the counsellor. She stretched her legs out, resting her hand on her large bump  - she was now 33 weeks along.

She sipped on a mineral water and sighed, reflecting on the last 4 months, wondering how it had come to pass that this appointment felt like it was going to be more geared to relationship counselling than to helping them cope with the trauma of their difficult journey to and through pregnancy.

She had felt so happy after the 12 week scan.  After they’d made love again for the first time since finding out they were pregnant, their sex life had got back to pretty much normal though he was always that bit more gentle with her than before.  He had seemed more relaxed and confident too. He’d come to the first appointment with the midwife where they were able to hear the heartbeat  - he was as thrilled as her to hear the rapid sound, kind of like a galloping horse, through the doppler machine.

For the next few weeks after that, at the weekly check in he’d try to be there but if he couldn’t, she would ring him or record the sound if he couldn’t break out from what he was doing. They had both felt so tempted to buy a doppler machine to monitor the heartbeat at home but decided that might mean she’d just be wired up to it 24/7 and the midwife cautioned against it since finding the heartbeat could sometimes be tricky and that would only cause unwarranted anxiety.

Not long after that was when the press had found out - was that when things had started to change she mused? By 16 weeks, so few of her clothes still fit that she had  decided to go on a shopping trip  with Chloe as she didn’t want to order everything online and she loved clothes shopping with Chloe.

They weren’t trying to be conspicuous but they’d gone somewhere quite fancy for lunch and a paparazzo had seen them there and followed them to a store afterwards, taking long range shots of them through the window in the maternity section of one store. With her growing bump on show there was no hiding now and the news got out. They themselves hadn’t participated particularly – Cheryl had just released a brief statement  confirming the pregnancy and “the following summer” as the due date. Her Fellow writers from the show she was working on had congratulated her at work and her and Keanu’s phones were constantly bleeping  for a few days with congratulations messages. Cheryl fended off numerous interview requests as neither of them felt ready nor that it should really be public business.

Each subsequent milestone had passed without a problem for the next 3 months.  At 20 weeks the baby was healthy and on track developmentally. They decided to wait until it was born to find out the sex. Why spoil one of life’s only remaining surprises just because you could?

Probably the biggest thrill so far was when she’d felt the baby move for the first time – it was at around At 22 weeks and had felt like flutters of a butterfly’s wings or bubbles of gas in her tummy. A couple of weeks later it was what they had termed “somersault city” when at last he could feel it too. The weird feeling of the baby turning inside was so dramatic it had woken her up in the early hours and she’d woken him to share it, certain that it could be felt by him now too. His favourite thing after that was to sit on a chair when she had a bath and watch her belly wriggle as she lay in the warm water. And throughout the pregnancy, even during these recent rockier times, he’d continued to talk to the baby every day, loving how he got a reaction each time.

She first remembered Keanu seeming a little down and distracted at around 28 weeks. They had made a trip to a store to look at furniture and equipment for the nursery. She’d been contented to browse different styles of crib, nursing chairs and changing stations but he’d wanted to make quick decisions. She didn’t know if it was because he’d been recognised a couple of times outside in the mall or something else. Then once they’d made decisions, they’d almost had a row in the shop when the store assistant had asked for delivery details. She assumed it could all  be delivered now while he said it could wait till when the baby had arrived or if not that long, could be stored at his mother’s home. She’d given in to the latter plan, determined to try and get on with setting up the nursery before too long  - she wanted things ready well in advance of delivery.

At 30 weeks, childbirth classes had started - there were some nice couples there who Emily thought might even become friends but Keanu was standoffish. If she didn’t know him, she’d have said he was being stuck up! Again she gave him the benefit of the doubt – maybe he was shy or nervous of them because they might be weird given his ‘celebrity’ status.

The next thing that had made her start to think about seeing the counsellor again had happened just the week before.  Keanu was due to do some press for a new film being released and Cheryl had come over to the house to talk to them together.  They needed to decide whether to talk about the baby at all and if he did what to say.  He’d very quickly cut off the conversation saying that he wanted Cheryl to inform all press that he only wanted to talk about the project or Arch. Emily had looked at him questioningly

“I just can’t” he’d said getting up and walking away out onto the patio.

Emily’s eyes had filled with tears. Cheryl saw and tried to reassure her

“I guess he knows he might get tongue tied or emotional and he’s on safe ground with the movie - and he wants the story to be the movie I guess”

Later that same week Keanu had met Autumn (an old friend and an old flame) for coffee  and a photo of him hugging her and kissing her on the cheek had been posted on an online gossip site along with snide comments about him cheating - Chloe shared it with Emily, feeling she shouldn’t be kept in the dark even if it was probably all nonsense. When Emily showed him, he said he’d just run into Autumn by chance when stopping for a coffee and  that she should know better than to read anything on such shitty websites.

Em had burst into tears at his harsh outburst. It was the last straw building on his recent sullen mood, his unwillingness to bring home the things for the baby’s room and reluctance to talk about it and her to the press.

“I’m sorry baby” he said putting his arm around her. I didn’t mean to snap, it’s just ……….. “

“Just what?” she sniffed

At his continuing silence, she made a decision

“Please can we go back to see the counsellor?, I feel like we’re drifting apart just when we should be the closest we’ve ever been”

Keanu’s shoulders slumped and he nodded. “OK I’ll set it up”

Emily looked up from her musings as Keanu greeted her, arriving from another press interview about the new film release

“Did it go OK?” she asked.

“Yup, it was fine. There seems to be positive buzz around it so fingers crossed. You OK?, you looked a million miles away when I arrived!”

“Did I?” she sighed “just thinking over the past few months, thinking about what the counsellor is going to ask”

He nodded, taking hold of her hand and leaning in to give her a kiss “you know I love you don’t you?”

Emily blushed hoping they weren’t drawing unwelcome attention with his public display of affection. It was unlike him to do something like that and it gave her a little reassurance.

“and how’s the munchkin?”

“Bit quieter today. It’s getting kind of tight for space in there I think”

She caught the trace of a shadow crossing Keanu’s face but then she yelped in surprise

“you OK?” he asked immediately

She burst out laughing

“Yes, I just got kicked right up here” she pointed quite high up by her rib-cage “I think they want to make their presence felt”

His grin was wide

“that’s my boy ……. or girl” he said happily “let’s eat”

Their meal was relaxed and Keanu seemed happier than he had in a few weeks.

At the counselling session she asked what had prompted the need to come back.

Emily was wondering where to begin when Keanu took a deep breath and spoke.

“It’s my fault” he began. “Even after everything we discussed before, about communicating our feelings and not believing that being positive can only lead to disaster, I’ve fallen back to my old ways”

“How so exactly?” she probed and he went onto explain directing his words to Emily more than the counsellor.

“I guess as things have gone on, instead of being more confident, I’m back to being shit scared ALL the time Em and I mean ALL the time and you’ve been so happy and excited, I didn’t want to spoil that with my dark thoughts. That’s why I didn’t want to bring home stuff for the nursery or talk to the press or make friends with other couples at the birthing class. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you”

He ran his hand through his hair in frustration with himself roughing it up as usual but his shoulders relaxed and it looked like a great weight had lifted off them now that he’d acknowledged his fears. Em reached out for his hand.

“I didn’t know what was bothering you and I didn’t ask either, I’m so sorry, this must be so hard on you after Ava”

“Have you talked to Emily about what happened with Ava Keanu?”

“Not really” he admitted “how would sharing that horror help?”

“Because then she can better understand why you feel the way you do. Talking about it won’t make it happen to this baby, remember. Denial and bottling up are not good coping mechanisms. Talking and being open are���

Later that night, as agreed in the session, they sat together on the sofa and Keanu had shared the details of the loss of Ava, starting with the frantic phone call to him on the set of “The Watcher” in New York after Jen had been told there was no heartbeat.

“God, she was just screaming and wailing down the phone, begging me to come home”

“God” was all Emily could say, the horror of it sinking in just a little.

“So I flew home straight away and on fucking Christmas Eve she had to deliver the baby naturally. You could hear the cries of other babies being born down the corridor but when Ava came out, all warm and beautiful it was just deafening silence”

“come  ‘ere” Em said pulling him down so he could lean his head in her lap  and let the tears out, great wracking sobs shaking his chest.

When he sat up he looked over at her, his expression wretched

“why? Why does it still hurt so much – it’s been fucking 21 years”

“it hurts because it was so awful and pain like that never goes away, you just cushion it and hide it I guess with the life and relationships that come after it”

“wow  that’s deep

“what can I say?” she said smiling “I am a writer you know “I’m supposed to understand the human condition – just sorry I didn’t use those skills to see what was going on with you”

“And  I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, I just didn’t want you to get scared of losing this little one” he said stroking her belly.

“You can’t stop me being scared hun, I am scared and maybe a little more each day as we get closer. It still feels like it could get taken away but every time they give me a kick or jump on my bladder and stop me sleeping then I feel OK. Maybe that makes it easier for me as well as the fact I didn’t go through what you did.”

He hugged her close and they went to bed feeling so much better for sharing their hopes and fears.

1  2 3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10  11  12

New Beginnings Baby Drabble

New Beginnings Baby Drabble No2

[saraa-lancee]

So what issues would you like them to tackle that hasn’t already been done on the show before?

(I just want to say this is my first ask ever and I've been here since... God maybe 2013? So thank you!!)

I would LOVE to see a new dimension to sexuality. I'm also casually of the team that's "Sara herself should say Bisexual" because Bisexual has only been said once on screen and Nate said it casually.. We have a scene where Sara says tells Nurse Lindsay that Lesbian isn't a bad word yet the show kinda doesn't act that way about Bi. Bi erasure is an issue that would be interesting-- since Sara is with Ava, it would be neat to have some line of "i didn't pick a team" or just along the lines of Still Bi With A Woman.

(They also missed an opertunity with Charlie to use neutral pronouns of some kind)--> a discussion further on gender identity would be cool too. There are casual set ups for this with Charlie, like in the Shakespeare episode, but nothing is ever really taken completely seriously or honestly even explicitly. I would really enjoy a nonbinary or intersex narrative in this particular context because I feel like the team of legends (as the people the characters are) would fit really nicely with that. But it would be cool to have a trans character that Gideon helps? Because the arrowverse trans character (in Supergirl-- Nia) is already transitioned. It would be cool to have a transitioning characer in a really casual way even (a particular scenario would be New Character leaving sickbey while someone else walks in. Other person asked if New is feeling OK and New just says like "oh yeah, just my hormones.). But yeah anything with gender identity.

I always hunger for more disability stories, but based on how they Wrote Sara's blindness... yikes. I remember watching a panel or something on YouTube about how Caity was hoping that Sara was at least going to have a cane or be shown to struggle with some stuff, but the writers ignored all of that. So its kind of touchy based on that but I think it would be really neat to have someone with a prosthetic (or even just an amputation, someone born without a limb, etc.)-- it would be a beautiful narrative about 'Gideon can literally grow you a new arm' and that character firmly saying no, this is me, having this difference doesn't make me less, you aren't "fixing" me because I'm not broken, I like myself, etc, whatever.

I know that for me personally one of the best things about the show is that Sara and Ava don't have to come out, and everyone just treats them like normal, but I think some kind of homophobia narrative would be good, not to a big extent but just to the extent like in S1 when Kendra and Ray move in 1950s and that dynamic only with the girls. Like, for the show to acknowledge homophobia in such a direct way, as they did with interracial relationships. This beyond the obvious homophobia of the Nazis. (I personally can't think of an aspect where its implied, but sometimes I can miss or misinterpret implicated stuff like that).

I would love to see a return to POC cultures and narratives (narratives outside of racism) S1 with Kendra and Carter and the Egyptian culture aspect, Amaya and Zambesi aspect. We see a tad bit of this with Zari and the bollywood scene, and Japan post WW2, but they are more side aspects now. It would be neat to go to India or other places in southeast Asia (culturally), or Central/South America. Overall, I would just like to see more of that cultural aspect because human culture is something that interests me a lot and I feel like can be easily casually thrown in with time travel--- traditional clothes, buildings, and ideals (an example of the ideals is the discussion in feudal Japan about the cultures views on death).

I feel like there was a lot of potential with Hank and Sara to continue that discussion about women in power. Yes, we have discussed this before. We do it a lot in second season with the JSA and even Jonah Hex but I think Hank had a lot of potential to add a dimension to that discussion. (honestly see next paragraph for more). That whole episode with the Minotaur i would have loved if they'd been a bit more explicit with that-- yes, obviously a woman can be in charge (in Hanks mind) but he has the right to walk in there and take over because her experience doesn't matter and also we will do whatever he wants. Sara spends almost the whole time just rolling her eyes and bitting her tongue besides a light quip in the beginning asking if a girls ever punched him. in the past Sara has literally exerted dominance over men so I was just kind of disappointed with that dynamic. I love the character of Sara as an "unconventional woman" or a "strange friend" and I've noticed comments like that pretty much stopped after the 3rd season. I know some people hated those comments but I think they can be good. I enjoyed them and would like to see them again because it's literally just Sara being unapologetically herself, a strong woman, doing whatever she does, no matter how weird or unconventional it is. (Which is an integral part of Saras character to me)

BUT its also not necessarily "new" issues. Issues don't go away in real life-- we had multiple issues about Race in America with Jax, from different points in history (Slavery and the 1950s). Jax even mentions how he still experiences Rascism today. The issues don't go away and just because they are mentioned once doesn't mean they can't (and shouldn't) be examined from other points in history. IE just because the show has talked about it before doesn't mean we can't talk about it again from a different angle and/or perspective.

I see a lot of potential with Astra with the racism thing (people are nicer to me in literal Hell) but it also would have been interesting with Mona, to show a different type of racism would have been INCREDIBLE.

I also can think of maybe a scene or two that would have just been a nice touch with Zari (either one, but I have a soft spot for Zari 1.0, and I think with her life as an illegal Muslim would have been an enriching perspective) as a Muslim. They are very good to her character in the way that she obviously abstains from Liquor and Pork, and observes Ramadan. But one thing that would have been interesting is for Zari to experience early 2000s (or honesty still right now) xenophobia. Especially Z1 since being a Muslim is Illegal in 2045 there was a lot of emotional potential there. (Although I feel like I can understand why the writers didn't want to touch that because of current conflicts).

Since we're going to outer space (that was actually confirmed right? Or was it just hinted and I misread??), I think issues will have to be character driven rather than time period driven. But therin we have a lot of potential-- a race of aliens without distinct genders (wait, so your worth can be dictated based off of your genitals?? Plus sexuality stuff there), aliens confused about race (I don't understand some of your skins are different colors... and your people treat each other differently based on this?). We could introduce a matriarchal society, which the crew with Captain Lance feel particularly unphased by. Perhaps we have a completely pacifist society or aliens made of inorganic materials (debates about what constitutes as alive, what lives are meaningful, etc.) You get the idea(I adore star trek so you can imagine my glee thinking about some of those scenarios).

I think for me, the hard shift to comedy was at the expense of some of my favorite aspects of the show and also things that set it apart. This Found Family is so rewarding because they are all so so different but those differences enrich each other. They become better people and feel at home without having to change who they fundamentally are. And they are whoever they want to be. I feel like now the show has simply had an incredibly jarring tone shift thats trying too hard to be a comedy. (This one is just an opinion but a joke among all the serious is always just a lot more funny to me. I find myself laughing more at one liners and random stuff in the early seasons. Now it feels like 'ok, what's the next ridiculous thing.')

I think... humanity is pretty dark. But humanity also rises above. This is why I adore the episode from post WW2 Japan and to me it personally really stands out from other episodes in s4/s5. The idea of creating and destroying, pain and sadness locked inside, terror and hatred for the beings you share the planet with. That pain creates monsters. Sometimes by accident. (Sara's pain turned her into the version of herself she called a monster.). And also about embracing your passions (Mick hiding his writing). In that episode, we still have jokes about Godzilla. Garima appears and its hilarious. But it's also an incredibly powerful narrative about pain and fear and shame and gives a perspective that the western audience wouldnt... necessarily think about (the actual consequences and what the bomb actually literally did.).

That darkness makes the light so much more meaningful. If everything becomes light... than why are we still fighting?

Sorry if this is jumbled, I'm on mobile so.

Also, sorry if this is a rant or whatever. I am very passionate about this topic and oh boy if I was on a computer and had the time I'd probably repondd with a link to a doc.

[queencocoakimmie]

Just Us (Jim Mason)

Jim Mason X Female Reader

Word Count: +6000 

Warnings: Angst, talk of suicide, smut, unprotected sex, drug use.

A/N: So, Surprise! If you know me, you know that I love Cody’s character, Jim Mason. I think I’ve seen The Tribes of Palos Verdes so many times, and it always leaves me feeling so brokenhearted. I’ve always wanted to give him a different ending, maybe even a happier one. This fic runs along the same theme as the movie, except it diverges in the middle. I changed a couple of characters and some big parts. The Real Estate Agent (Ava) that Phil (the twins’ dad) falls in love with, has a son in the movie, but in this fic, she actually has a daughter, our protagonist. It gets really deep for a bit. The girl suffered a big loss in her life and her memories of it are pretty raw. Anyway, I hope that you like it. Here we go.

           Life in Palos Verdes was boring. Every day was literally the same thing over and over. School, the country club, this fucking house. It was all so monotonous. I hated it here and longed to be away, maybe someplace new. New York? Miami? Mexico? The only thing that I loved about this place was the beach. It’s like the ocean would call my name and beg me to go out there and sketch it. It was all around us, and it was mine.

           I would stare out of my window for hours, it would seem and daydream about moving away from everyone. From her. My relationship with my mother was complicated at best. At worst? I hated that bitch and she hated me. She was your typical Palos Verdes sheep. They all played tennis in their tight, little green tennis outfits, trying to bag the next rich guy or fuck the towel boy. They would gossip in the club’s restaurant and be drunk by noon. Every time there was a new member, they’d swarm them like sharks at a feeding frenzy. I hated them.

Ava (my mom) would always try to get me to hang around with them and maybe go on dates with their sons. Seriously? What would I want with them? They all looked the same. Like they all came out of the same lame factory or something.

Then one night, she dragged me to some party at the club. “We have a new family to welcome”, she said. Like I cared. “Honey, they have a son and a daughter, maybe you’ll hit it off with them. I sold them a house, isn’t that funny? The kids’ father seems so…nice.” Dear God, I knew that twinkle in her eye. She thought he was attractive. I feel sorry for his wife, against my piranha of a mother, she’ll stand no chance.

The party was like everything else here, bland and full of middle-aged rich people, trying to be cool. I saw some kids from school and waved to them. But I had zero interest in talking to any of them. It was enough that I saw them at school during the day, but here? Now? Nope. I wanted to get away. Take a midnight swim. Sketch some doodles by the water. Forget about my life for a few hours.

I saw the pack descend on the new family. There were people all over them, I couldn’t even get a good look at them. All I could hear were people saying how good looking a family they were. How nice they seemed. Great, another group of social climbers, as if we didn’t already have enough. I had to leave.

I walked outside onto the lanai and felt the cool breeze from the water roll off my skin. The air was clean and fresh, not like other places. I could taste the salt in the air when I opened my mouth. The DJ put on some 90’s hip-hop and I started to sway to it. It reminded me of my dad. He loved 90’s music. God, I miss him.

“Hey” I heard a small voice from behind me say. I turn to see a pretty blond girl who looks a bit lost. “Hey,” I say back. She stands next to me and we both look out at the ocean. We don’t say a word to each other. It’s like…it’s like we just understand. Is that weird?

After a few minutes of silence, I say, “My name is Kassidy, but people just call me Kass.” She nods her head. But, before she can tell me her name, she sees her mom and takes off without saying a word. I call after her, “Nice to meet you.” She turns back to wave then continues walking over to her mother.

It’s a curious sight watching the two of them. The mom was sitting there smoking all by herself. The girl walks over to her and sits next to her on the steps. They’re actually talking to each other. I wish I had that with my mom. After dad died, our relationship was never the same. She didn’t talk to me for a while, she said that I looked too much like him and it hurt her to see me. As if that was my fault.

I see them both look off into the distance and I follow their gaze. I see Heather has caught another boy in her web. He’s cute and a bit dorky. He’s wearing a sombrero, with a white shirt and tie. Totally not Heather’s type. He has a nice smile, though.

No longer wanting to stick around, I leave the party, without my mother. What’s the worst the could happen? I get grounded? Big deal. I’d rather walk along the beach anyway, alone. I look back and see the mom and daughter still talking. Tears sting my eyes. Ava and I would never be like that. There’s too much baggage there. In two years, I’ll be 18, then I’ll go wherever I want. Do whatever I want. I’ll be away from her and this place.

At school the next day, I see the new girl at the lunch table by herself. I contemplate walking over there to sit with her because she seems lonely. Instead, I join my friends, if that’s what you would call them. They’re in mid-conversation about the new kids. “She’s weird. Her brother is over there with them and she’s sitting by herself?” “What a freak!” I shake my head, “Guys, you don’t even know her, chill.” They laugh and call me sensitive. “It’s gotta be hard coming here from another place. We’ve been in Palos Verdes our whole lives. It’s gotta be a culture shock.” They nod their heads in agreement and then start talking about plans for the weekend. I look back over to her and feel her sadness. She’s staring at her brother. He seemed to fit right in with everybody. Ugh, Heather is sitting on the edge of the table, flirting heavily with him. I roll my eyes. I hate that girl.

In class, I say hi to her as I pass her desk. She looks up at me and smiles, “hey”.  I sit at the desk next to her and get my books and pencils out. “My name’s Medina. I didn’t get to tell you the other night.” I smile at her. She seems like a sad soul. Kind of like me.

After school is over, I wait for my mom on the steps of the school and see her and her brother ride off on their bikes. I wish I could go with them, they look so happy. What I would give to have that. If only my dad were here…

One night, I overheard Ava on the phone with some man, making plans for the night. It makes me sick to my stomach. Here she goes again. Pretty soon, she’ll come up and tell me to get lost, go stay at friend’s house, so she can have some privacy. I leave before she comes to knock on my door. I run out to the beach and strip off my clothes. My tears mixing with the salty water. I sob into the waves. My lonely mother, stalking her prey, like a hungry animal. She can’t have her own happiness, so she’s going to take someone else’s. It’s not fair.

I swim until my arms are sore. I can’t do this anymore. I contemplate drowning myself right here and now, to escape the pain. But, a memory of my dad flashes through my mind. He’s laughing and teaching me how to swim. We were so happy then. It’s been so long since he’s been gone, that I’ve begun to forget his voice. He had such sad eyes. Like Medina, like Jim. I drag myself out of the water and dry myself off. I go home to pack an overnight bag. I’ll have to find a place to sleep tonight.

I text Medina. She says come right over. We all stay up late that night. Laying on the floor, me, her and Jim. Talking about moving to Bali or Fiji, getting away from here. Jim rubs my back and I feel a tingle go down my spine. Medina throws a pillow at me and laughs. We all end up falling asleep on the floor of Medina’s room, wrapped up in each other’s arms. I wish I could freeze this moment and keep it forever.

As time goes by, Medina, Jim and I spend more time together. Most of it is spent watching them surf, while I sketch them in my notebook. We laugh and talk about the future. What we want to do or hope to have. I can tell there is something just underneath the surface. A tension going on behind the scenes. There’s a real sadness that’s taken over the two of them. I want to ask, but I’m afraid.

Medina texted me one afternoon and told me to meet them at our usual spot. I rush out of the house and arrive to see a big group of people hanging out. I’m confused because the Bay Boys are there. I expected just the three of us, like always. The guys are passing beer and weed around, and pills too. I see Heather and she’s cornered, Jim. I watch helplessly as she reaches up on her tiptoes to kiss him. It hurts and I feel my heartbreak. I turn to see that Medina has seen it too. She looks at me in horror. She knew how I felt about him.

When it would be just me and her, she would tease me about how I looked at him, how I acted around him. “Medina, you’re insane. You guys are like my family. I don’t see him like that, he is like my brother.” She would roll her eyes and nod, “Yeah, ok Kass. I see things y’know.”

The sun goes down and they’re all high and drunk. Even Jim. His eyes glazed over and blissed out. He’s not acting like himself. I watch as he runs and jumps on the hood of someone’s car and hangs on as it drives around in circles. It’s not like him. I look over to Medina and she shakes her head. She doesn’t know what to do either. We get away from the group and find ourselves sitting together on the rocks watching the waves crash against the shore.  

“You should tell him, you know.” She breaks the silence. I don’t look at her, but I know what she’s talking about. “You should tell him that you’re in love with him. If you don’t, I will.” I sigh, “But Medina, he’s with Heather. I don’t want to break them up. I’d be just like Ava.” It hurts to say that out loud. I’ve never said that to anyone. I’ve never actually acknowledged what she had done to our family. “You can’t tell your heart what not to feel, Kass. You should just tell him.”

Medina calls me frantic one day. Her father told her that he’s fallen in love with someone else. That he has a new chance in life to have love. “How could he do this to us?” She screams over and over into the phone. When I get there, her and Jim are standing outside, hugging each other. I can still hear their mother screaming at their dad. It’s hard to hear because it reminds me of my parents. I grab them both and we all stand there, locked into this triangle embrace. I feel their loss. I’ve been through this before.

When my Dad found out that my mom was cheating on him. He flipped out and lost it. It really broke his heart. They argued and argued, and things never got better. After the divorce, I would still try to see him every day after school, but it got really tough. He was so sad all of the time. Until one day, I came to visit him and there were an ambulance and police cars outside. I tried to run to the condo, but they kept pushing me back. One of the neighbors came over to me and hugged me. She kept apologizing to me. I saw them roll the stretcher out of his condo. Realization and nausea hit me like a wave. It was him. It was my Dad.

I’m there long enough to hear my mom’s name come up in their parents’ argument and I crane my neck to hear what they’re saying. He said that he loves her and has a chance to be happy. She screams when she realizes that Ava is the Real Estate agent, they had dinner with a year ago, the one that sold them this house. Jim and Medina look at me and Medina says, “Isn’t that your mom?” I nod my head and we all just stand there in silence. We don’t know what to say to each other.

My phone buzzes as I see Phil’s car pull away from the house. It’s her, it’s Ava. I don’t answer. I know what she wants to tell me. I throw my phone into the sand. I hate her even more now.

Time passes and Phil has now moved into our house. It’s so disturbing to see him at the kitchen table in the morning. Sitting in the same spot my dad used to. He tries to talk to me, to reach out but I have nothing to say to him. I don’t want a “relationship” with him. Even if they are engaged. She scolds me for not speaking to my soon-to-be stepfather. Disgusting.

Medina and I have grown closer as we’ve grown apart from our parents. All we have is each other these days. Jim is growing more and more distant. When I see him now, he’s always so wasted. I’m worried about him. Medina tells me that she’s watching him spiral and she can’t do anything to stop it. Their mother, Sandy, is so deep into her depression, that she doesn’t even notice Jim’s change. She’s even begun to treat him like a husband instead of a son. She reminds me of my Dad when he started to lose himself.

A text in the middle of the night from Medina, makes me jump in my seat by the window. I have insomnia so at night when I can’t sleep, I draw. I was lost in concentration. Sketching the planes of Jim’s face from memory, when her frantic texts ping on my phone. She tells me to meet her at the hospital. When I get there, I find her sitting next to a sleeping Jim. He’s wearing a hospital gown, with tubes in his arms. She looks up at me with red-rimmed eyes. “He overdosed tonight. He almost died.” She cries. I feel myself get faint. My poor sweet Jim, laying there like an Angel. He looks so…

I walk over to him and touch his cheek and it’s cold. My heart is heavy because I know that he is struggling with so much inner turmoil. Trying to be strong for Medina. Trying to be supportive to Sandy. But who is there for him? Who can he turn to? He can’t lay all of his problems at his sister’s feet. My poor Jim is lost. But, not anymore, he has me. I lean forward and kiss his forehead and whisper in his ear, “I love you, James.”

Medina and I walk outside, arms around each other. Her mother looks at us both with so much spite. I’m almost certain that she hates not only me but Medina as well. We sit together in the waiting room all night. We make a promise to each other, from here on out, it’s just us. No more Sandy, Ava. No more Phil no more Heather. Just us.

It’s been months since that night. Jim hasn’t touched the drugs. We’ve stuck to our pact, even after Ava married their Dad. The night of my 17th birthday, they all planned a party at the country club. I didn’t want to go, but Medina convinced me. I knew that they were going to be there, so it made me feel better. I had shut myself off from the other people I used to hang out with. They were toxic and immature. Lately, my life seemed to revolve around the twins. At times, I thought that maybe we suffocated each other, but in all actuality, we needed each other. No one else understood loneliness like ours. My love for Jim grew by the minute. I was in love with every detail of him. His floppy hair that always fell into his eyes. The beauty marks that dotted his face and chest. His smile and the way he would laugh at my stupid jokes. Medina would beg me to tell him, he wasn’t with Heather anymore, so there’d be no excuse not to.

           She helped me pick out the dress I got for my party. We had gone into town that previous weekend to buy it. Jim didn’t want to go with us, he couldn’t stand shopping at girly stores. Instead, he went surfing. We worried so about him but he assured us that he would be safe. She picked out a pretty, pale pink sheath dress that fell like silk against my tanned skin. I secretly hoped that it would catch his eye and make him look at me differently.

           The party goes off without a hitch. The country club ballroom was cordoned off just for me. Ava and Phil stood over there in the middle of it all like it was their party. They were it new “it couple”, holding court for the masses. They see me and wave me over to them, to bask in adoration. These people are fake and clamoring for their attention. Half of them don’t even know me.

           After, all the glad-handing, I searched the crowd for the twins. I had started to get nervous until I saw Medina. Her head thrown back in laughter, she was talking to a boy. I remember her talking about him, a few weeks back. His name was Adrian. He was cute, with dark hair and long eyelashes. I watched as she touched his arm and he touched her hand. It made me smile to see her so happy. She deserved that. I kept looking through the crowd for Jim. But when I couldn’t find him and that little bit of pain grew in my heart, I left the ballroom to get away. I couldn’t let anyone see me cry. Today of all days.

When I reach the end of the hallway, I look around to make sure no one is there. I feel the tears well up and the sob begins to rip from my chest. Tonight, was the night I was going to tell him. I was going to tell him that I love him. I’ve loved him since the first time I saw him, with that silly sombrero on his head. I was going to tell him that I needed him more than a friend.

A hand touches my shoulder and I jump. “Hey, what are you crying for?” His voice, so sweet and smooth. I don’t want to face him, I’m too embarrassed. He walks around and steps in front of me. He places one hand on my waist and one under my chin. “Hey”, his voice softer now, “Kass, what’s wrong?” I look up at him, eyes blurry and I say, “I thought you weren’t here. I thought you hadn’t come.” It sounds stupid when I say it out loud. “Why wouldn’t I come, you’re my best friend.”

He pulls me closer to him and stares into my eyes. His face full of understanding, and I think for the first time, he really sees me. He understands my tears. He holds me and we look at each other for what seems like forever. I’m sure he knows how I feel. But I’m too scared to say it.

I hear my name being called, and I know that this moment is gone. He takes my hand and we walk back to the party, not wanting this to end. We walk in and everyone starts singing ‘Happy Birthday’ to me. I smile, cheeks blushing. They bring out the big cake and it has seventeen beautiful candles on it. I look over at Ava and she smiles at me, a real smile. She tells me to make a wish. I look over at Medina and Jim, as they flank either side of me. They smile big smiles at me too, they’re happiness filling me with joy. Jim squeezes my hand, I close my eyes, make my wish and I blow out my candles.

A few weeks later, I hear Phil tell Ava that Sandy is going away for a while to get some help and that he wants Jim and Medina to live with us. But he worries about Jim and I being around each other too much. He suspects that we are more than just friends. “It wouldn’t be right, Ava. They’re step-siblings”. After a minute of silence, she says, “If they are in love, it’s not our job to stand in their way. They have been close since before you and I were even together. How horrible would it be to tear that apart?” She’s never stood up for me before. Not for school, not with anything, so I stand there eavesdropping at their door in shock. “Besides, who gives a shit what anyone has to say about us or them?” She continues, “It’s none of their goddamn business. If the kids want to, let them move in for however long they want.”

After they move in, everything is like a dream. We hang out every day on the beach after school, them surfing, me drawing. We have study sessions and throw chips at each other when the topic is getting too boring or we’ve had enough. We have big breakfasts with each other and laugh at our inside jokes. Medina’s boyfriend, Adrian comes around a lot, so now our group of three has expanded to a group of four. Jim and I are getting closer and closer. We have tiny moments when I think something will happen. A brush of his fingertips across my hand when we pass each other. His hand on my hip, when he reaches up to get the cereal over our heads. When he lingers in my bedroom after we all say goodnight. It’s there, that sexual tension. It hangs over us, like a cord ready to snap.

Movie Fridays we all usually go out together, but this time Medina is sick, and Adrian is upstairs taking care of her. Ava and Phil have gone to Paris for some work conference thing of his. It’s just me and Jim and it’s my turn to pick the movie. He makes a huge bowl of popcorn and grabs candy from the pantry. “Ok, Kass, what are we watching tonight?” I picked out ‘A Quiet Place’, I remember Jim saying that he had seen it and thought it was so good. “I thought scary movies freaked you out?” I nod and say, “But you’re here with me. I won’t be too scared.”

As the movie goes on and my anxiety level ratchets up, I feel my nerves bundling. I moved so close to him, I’m almost on top of his thigh. A jump scare happens on screen and I gasp and bury my face into his chest. He wraps his arm around me and when I look up at him, I become hyper-aware of his body and that we are alone. Our eyes lock onto one another and everything else falls away.

Our eyes saying things to each other that words could never convey. I move closer to him, doe-eyed, lips wet. He brings his other hand down to touch my face. “You are so beautiful, Kassidy.” Slowly, our lips meet, and the kiss is passionate and tender. I was expecting it to be hungry and ravenous. But it’s gentle and loving. He runs his hand through my hair and grips it at the base of my head. I feel him moan against my lips when I touch his inner thigh. He pulls me onto his lap and lifts my shirt up over my head. I’ve been around him plenty of times in my bathing suit, but this is so intimate, I suddenly become nervous. I cover up my stomach with my arm, not wanting him to see my soft belly. He pulls my arm away and places my hand on his face. I kiss him again and help him take off his shirt. We share an unspoken understanding. We belong to each other. He asks for my permission to keep going and I nod. He then unfastens my bra and frees my breasts, from their constriction. I sigh audibly at the welcome relief. He holds them in his hands and bites his bottom lip. I’ve never been this close to a boy before. I’ve made out with boys before, but never like this.

He bends his head down and licks languidly at my nipple. I breathe in a sharp intake of air at the sensation. He takes my nipple into his mouth and sucks on it slowly, lazily. I grip his hair, absentmindedly, and pull his head back. “Do you want me to stop?” He asks, huskily. “Please don’t.” I moan. I can feel the wetness pool in my panties, I’m almost certain he can too.

He keeps sucking at my nipple and caressing and pinching the other. I feel my body rocking back and forth on his lap, rubbing myself against his thighs. I don’t know if I can take much more. His bulge growing and becoming harder against his grey sweatpants. He suddenly picks me up and wraps my legs around his waist. “Not here, not like this.”, he says against my neck. He takes me upstairs, kissing me, hands gripping my ass. Our breaths are ragged from excitement. I hear Medina’s door creak open and then shut. I hear her and Adrian laugh. I look down at him and smile, “I think they can hear us.” His blue eyes shine at me, under the moonlight. “I don’t care. I only care about you.” He opens the door and lays me onto the bed.

I look around his room, and his walls are littered with pictures of the three of us. Always the three of us. Laughing, smiling, happy. I look at him standing there and warmth flushes through my body. “I love you, James Mason. I love you with all of my heart.” I scoot to the end of the bed and start to untie his sweatpants, but he stops me. He gets down on his knees and kisses me before he says, “I love you too. I’ve loved you since the beginning. I heard you that night when I was in the hospital. You gave me the will to live. I’m here because you saved me.” I wrap my arms around his neck and tears begin to fall down my face and splash onto his shoulder.

He pulls back from me to wipe my tears and kisses me again. He lays me back down and helps me shimmy out of my pajama pants. Then he hooks his thumbs into the waistband of my panties and slowly pulls them off. The air hits my naked skin, and goosebumps pimple my flesh. I feel so exposed, I put my hand over my vagina. He looks up me, a lust has darkened his face. His eyes look like he is ready to devour me. He pulls my hand away and licks his lips. I raise myself up onto my elbows in anticipation. I’ve always heard how good this feels, but I’ve never experienced this before. I’m not sure what to expect.

He scoots in closer and pushes my legs apart. He starts with tiny little kisses on my inner thighs, and my hips are already bucking against him, “Not yet, kitten, you’re going to have to wait.” I feel the heat low in my abdomen and my mind is starting to spin. His tiny kisses turn into tiny licks and when he gets to my entrance, he licks a flat wide, stripe against my folds. I gasp so loudly, I have to cover my mouth with my hand. He licks slow and gentle against my clit, as I buck against his mouth. My hand buries itself in his hair and pulls on it. He groans and sucks on my clit vigorously. The sensations I’m feeling wrack my body. I’m writhing on the bed and push his face into my dripping cunt. His licks and sucks are becoming wetter and the noises are obscene. The tensions building and building until he gently pushes his index finger into me. He starts off slowly and then in between licks he pushes in a little further. I begin to unravel as I breathlessly call out his name. “Please…don't…stop James.” He inserts another finger and stretches me wide. My body can’t take anymore, and I explode. I scream out his name against the inside of my hand and cum all over his tongue. My body still rolling with pleasure, he licks my cunt clean.

I scoot my body up the bed and he crawls on top of me. His chin glistening with my juices. The moonlight streaming through the windows, playing shadows across his face. I’m so turned on by his smile, I pull him towards me roughly. Kissing him, I can taste the tanginess of myself on his lips. He kisses down the side of my face and onto my neck, I turn my head and see the ripples of muscles in his arms as he holds himself above me. He moves down to suck on my nipples again, but I stop him, “I want you, James. I want all of you.”

“Are you sure? I want you to be sure this is what you want” I nod at him and tell him that I am. He hops off the bed and unties his pants, they drop to the floor and there he is, in all his glory. His dick was hardened and the tip was slick with precum. My mouth waters wanting to taste him in my mouth, but before I can, he crawls back on top of me. Kissing me hungrily, rubbing himself against me. I reach down and grab his dick and he tilts his head back in pleasure. I begin to rub up and down the shaft, circling my thumb on the tip. He growls through gritted teeth, “I need you now, are you ready?” I squeeze his dick in response and open my legs wide. He lines himself up with my entrance and slowly starts to guide himself in. A rush of pain pools in my vagina as he thrusts. He’s so gentle, but my body craves this release. I grab his hips and pull him forward. His eyes go big and he takes this a sign to keep going. His rhythm, in tune with my body, rocks back and forth, going deeper and deeper. We’re both breathing so heavily, moans mixed in unison with each other. I feel so much pleasure that I don’t feel the sting of the loss of my virginity. I dig my fingers into his hips, begging him to fill me up. Harder and faster until we both are slick with sweat; his thumb finds its way to my clit and rubs it in circles. With him pumping in and out of me and playing with my clit, I feel the pressure of another orgasm building. “Do you like that, Kass? Does it feel good inside of you?” He says in my ear. The sensation of his breath of the outer shell of my ear, send shocks down my body. I can’t hold on anymore. My body bucks against him and the sounds of our sweaty bodies slapping against each other is explicit and loud. I cum so hard that my body shakes under his. Still clenched onto him, I feel his movements getting sloppier until his body gives out. He cums, calling out my name and collapses on top of me.

Neither of us moves, even after he’s gone soft inside of me. He lays there, kissing my shoulder and my face. “Are you ok, baby?” I smile at him and tell him that I am. He finally pulls out of me and we both get under the covers. He wraps his arm around me and asks, “I never did ask you, what did you wish for on your birthday?” I roll over and look up at him, “I’ll never tell, but this is pretty damn close.”

2 Years Later

The summer we all turned 18, we decided to leave Palos Verdes, like we had always planned. Sandy, the twins’ mom, was doing so much better now. She had moved back to Michigan and started teaching again. She seemed really happy. They would go visit her at Thanksgiving or Christmas and she’d always ask them to stay. But their lives were here in P.V they weren’t ready to leave just yet. Ava and Phil had a nasty divorce. He cheated on her with one of the nurses, apparently, this wasn’t news to Jim and Medina, as it had happened many times before when he was married to their mom. They were surprised though that he had been faithful this long. Ava kicked him out, but let the twins stay with us, much to his chagrin. He moved into a condo on the beach and we’d see him when we’d go surf and hang out. Adrian had been accepted to college but convinced his parents to let him take a gap year. Phil must have felt so bad about disrupting the twins’ lives in the first place, that he barely needed any convincing on letting them travel the world.

When I sat down and told Ava about our plans, she was hesitant at first. She said we were too young to travel without supervision. But I explained to her that we’re all of age now, and could just leave if wanted to, without permission. She seemed to think it over before saying, “Ok, but you have to call every day and check in. I need to know where you are at all times. Do you understand?” I hugged and kissed her cheek, something I hadn’t done since before Dad died. “Thank you, Mom. I love you.” She was so shocked that tears sprang from her eyes and she hugged me so tight I thought I would suffocate.

The day we left Palos Verdes, we all stood on the rocks, arms around each other and said goodbye to this place. Let the spray from the ocean sprinkle our faces. This was the last time, I’d feel this here. This was the last time this sun would set on my face. We were taking the good memories, like the ones I had of my dad and the laughs the four of us shared together, with us. We were leaving behind the bad memories, like the twins’ parents breaking up and Jim’s drug overdose. That stuff didn’t matter anymore. We had each other, and we were going to look out for one another.

We packed up the van and said our goodbyes to our parents. I sat in the passenger seat as Jim drove. Medina and Adrian played Uno in the back, singing along to the radio. This was as close to perfect as life could get. I was staring out of the window, lost in thought when I felt Jim’s hand enclose around mine. I look over at him and smile. He was so beautiful, and he was mine. All mine. I turn back to the window and I’m reminded of the wish I made for my 17th birthday. It had come true after all. I wanted to leave Palos Verdes and its perfectly manicured lawns and glistening white sands. I wanted to leave this place and be with the people who loved me the most. I wanted to be with him. Just us.

  Taglist:

@lovelykhaleesiii @petersfern-fics @langdonsoceaneyes @katiekitty261@xtheinevitableprophecyx @michael-langdon-appreciation @langdonsrapture@langdonsinferno @confettucini @queenie435 @kinlovecody @ghostiesbedroom@floweryshell @itschelseag @flowersirenreads @maso-xchrist @thelangdoncooperative@icylangdon @my-ahs-nightmare @americanhorrorstudies @the–queen-of-hell@trashisawayoflife @mytrash-mylife @ccodyfern @sojournmichael @michaellangdom@hisgirlwonder @winxfred @langdons-rep @langdonsdemon @sassylangdon @napping-is-my-favorite @stupidocupido @sloppy-little-witch-bitch26 @7-wonders @elangdon4@michaellangdong @khaleesimel @fanfictionrecommendations-com@disappointing-cheesecake @whoviancumberbunny @thedeviltohisangel @jimmlangdon@lvngdvns @lxngdonscoven @duncvn @marvelgal666 @lovemesomeworlddomination @readsalot73 @heda-mikaelson @cvrrigvn @ritualmichael @sweetlangdon @michael-langdon6 @michael-lngdon @yourkingcodyfern @dark-jim

[nokikissa]

Whooooooooo did it, beat the story of borderlands 3 now. It took me 42 hours but I think I got still like some of those fight wave of enemies arena things I could do but I’ll look into that later, I did all the crew challenges and side mission outside of those type of things.

Story and character wise it was a bit of a mixed bag, there were a lot of things I like and couple things I really didn’t like, but all in all I had fun, the gameplay was excellent, and most likely I will play it again, to co-op with buddies or to try out different vault hunters.

Putting more in-depth thoughts about some story and character things under the cut, extreme major spoiler warning as I’ll be talking about like big plot moments and such.

I quite like most of the new characters they introduced in this, I’ve only played Fl4k and loved them, but from everything I’ve seen I feel like I’ll love the other new vault hunters as well. The Calypso twins were delightful villains, very entertaining but also like I couldn’t wait to get to kill them lmao. And then there’s like Ava, I loved her and her relationship with Maya that was good stuff. And Wainwright I quite liked as well, and I was very happy that Hammerlock finally has a boyfriend and is in a good relationship. And also Lorelei and Clay were both good too, tho I probably like Lorelei more of those haha.

How it handled some old characters tho.... That’s a bit mixed. Like I liked a lot of them: Lilith, Eliie, Tannis, Maya, Zer0, Sir Hammerlock.... Even Rhys! They got Rhys down surprisingly well in my opinion! Obviously he was bit more comedic and doofy but like it was still reminiscent of how Rhys acted in like comedic moments of tales, I could recognize where they got his personality from and so on, it was fine!

...Which makes it even more baffling that they fucked up Vaughn so completely that with Vaughn it feels like the writer maybe got a super vague description of the character at best which had been passed down through multiple people twisting it around like a game of broken telephone. I just don’t understand where they pulled some character traits for him at all.... During the game I tried my best to ignore his existence, which worked well for a long while until the game made you go back to pandora and made him story relevant again, god every time he spoke my reaction was like “please shut up...”

But. I knew that was coming. The Commander Lilith DLC and promotional pics and so on made it clear ahead of time that I would not like Borderlands 3 Vaughn. I had had time to go through the stages of grief and resign to being all well I’m gonna be one of those salty tales fans and keep on drawing content of like tales Vaughn and ignore the rest of the canon for him.

So anyway I was really liking the story during like the Promethea Atlas Vs. Maliwan Arc actually, Rhys and Zer0 and their interactions were fun, Katagawa was an enjoyable villain as well, I just hope the fandom don’t make him annoying to me... So yeah that arc was good and fun.... and then the Promethea Vault happened. I am still a bit on the fence about how I feel about Maya getting killed off. On one hand, I did not see that coming and it did get an emotional “Nooo D:” reaction out of me, which well I’ve seen games with similar character getting killed off scenes that are supposed to be a big deal but my reaction is just like “ok”, like Borderlands 2 with Roland for example. But like yeah I didn’t want her to die, and it feels like kind of a waste cos let’s face it in 2 she didn’t have that much personality since the game didn’t do voice lines for the vault hunters reacting to the story etc. So now she was finally getting to be her own character I feel like aaaand then she dies. :/

And then we moved on to the Eden 6 arc and initially I was excited all Oh get to meet Hammerlock’s Boyfriend! But soon my excitement soured............

So Aurelia’s evil now huh.... And like cartoonishly evil...... Man I hate what they did with Aurelia in this game, it really smashed my good mood coming from the promethea arc to this.... Like in pre-sequel sure she kept claiming herself to be evil and a bitch and so on, but yet when Jack did like actually horrible shit she did not agree with those, she felt bad about Felicity’s fate and didn’t agree with Jack killing the scientist, she even objected when Jack was killing off all claptraps! But nah here’s she’s evil, murdering people left and right and also fucked Troy Calypso cos idk she evil now  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Like god............ I really didn’t expect Aurelia of all the characters whose portrayal I’d be having this much issues but here we are... I guess I’m more pissed about it atm cos as I said with Vaughn I knew what was coming, but with Aurelia I kinda feel Bait and switched by the promotional material cos in all of those that I saw they showed like both the Hammerlocks and Wainwright standing next to each other so you know I was expecting her to be an ally, like maybe she and Alistair had started to tolerate each other and so on but NOPE! Go kill this character you like! Thanks a lot gearbox...

That’s the major issues I had with characters I suppose, Tho it is a bit disappointed Maya and Zer0 were only vault hunters from 2 that showed up. Would’ve been fun to get more personality for more of them. I did find some echo logs involving Krieg at one point which were interesting, aaaand according to like the sort of background filler assets Axton does porn now lmao. Also hmm where were Athena and Janey? Fiona and Sasha? So many characters missing... I know they’ve said probably more characters show up in dlcs, but still. Story wise kinda funny tho, like did Lilith contact the vault hunters from 2 for help at all? Were all of them like “sry I’m busy ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ “??

Also one weird bit about the Eden 6 arc, it felt kiiinda out of place for borderlands that there were npcs being all “Oh man I sure love the Jakobs family they treat me well”, borderlands has sorta been all “the gun corporation suck” beforehand... I suppose the Promethea arc was bit too pro corporation in some way, but with that at least mostly the npc I saw were like “Rhys says he’s trying to do good with atlas... hm we shall see how that’ll pan out...” suspicion, but with the Jakob there were characters being all oh Jakobs is so great such good corporation :)

At the end side of the game you could get sooo much lore about like sirens which I loved, translating the eridian artifact things like clarified on like how sirens come to be and all which is great! According to that siren in her life can choose who specifically inherits her powers after she dies, or “release her powers into the unknown” which when described kinda gave me the impression that it’ll pass those onto some baby that’s born at some point, which yay clarification on the whole are sirens born as sirens or do they get their powers later: answer is both!

And it appears that Angel decided to pass her powers onto Tannis before she died? Which is interesting. And aw Maya chose Ava to inherit her powers.

That ending tho..... uhhh isn’t Elpis an inhabited place? How did that whole thing affect the people living on elpis lmao....?

And god that ending credits song, it is fitting but I just can’t take it seriously asfsfdggs...

i guess I’ll now move onto talking about the gameplay....

The gameplay was great. Same old Borderlands gameplay except with some improvements making it better, and that is exactly what I wanted from the game.

I especially love the way the guns are now and how much variety there is between the manufacturers, and even within them! Like previously I rarely liked to use shotguns in borderlands games, but in this one I fell in love specifically with the Maliwan Shockwave shotguns, and when one I had started to be too low leveled I desperately tried looking for new one everywhere lol.

And also Atlas gun’s smart bullet gimmick is so good especially now that I played on console, I know I joked about that before the game came out I’m sorry Rhys lol.

I really enjoyed the environments in the game, the planets looked cool and unique, and the maps were interesting. And god some of them are so huge! Which does cause some issue tho... They are weirdly stingy with ammo vending machines. In previous games they usually had ammo vending machines before like boss fight rooms, but in this one nope! Most of the time they only have those in like beginning of the map or like where fast travel points are? That’s annoying... And another issue is that the maps are big and sorta maze-like at times, so even though you have the mission marker in the mini map, I still needed to constantly open the map to see how to get to it, you can’t just go straight in the direction of the mission marker.

Gotta say, I was bit disappointed that we only visited Athenas to get Maya, I was hoping we’d return there cos the planet was very pretty but nope....

Fl4k’s gameplay was really fun, I got the skill that lets fl4ks pet heal you and man that skill is a lifesaver, there were some boss fights I survived purely because of Mr Chew keeping me alive by reviving me lol.

I did encounter few glitched that caused me to have to restart the game cos some mission objective got stuck somewhere and I couldn’t advance, that was a bit annoying. But it was only very few and like well into the game, compared to the hours I played it feels like a pretty good track record for playing a game right on it’s release haha.

So uh yeah. In summary again: Extremely fun gameplay, mixed bag story and characters. Had fun, will play again.

[evieextragay-blog]

Ok, so...

I really wanna write this, and so I shallllll

Borderlands 3 rewrite pitch

Vault of the destroyer key shows athenas instead of promethea

On the way claptrap or idc who, maybe maliwan screw up the flight and we crash on eden-6 the same time the family jewel does

Gaige and deathtrap are a part of B-team and are also helping in trying to free hammerlock

We fill in b-team on the scenario and they join in, if not all of b-team, just gaige

Gaige brings up how they could use some spare equipment for the ship (insert random ship component here)

Suggests we see axton

Axton joins along and comes aboard sanctuary with gaige (best buds)

Eden six arc goes on mostly unchanged otherwise, focus to get back in space is changed to "might as well do this vault since its here"

Also the eden six vault will have the rampager and maya wont die cus she isnt there and i guess gaige and DT could tag along to guide or somethin'

Tyreen takes the berserker's energy,

here, either the hunters get away as the twins banter or argue, or DT sacrifices himself for gaige and the hunters.

Athenas stufffff

Mostly the same, but instead it'll now be unsure as to why maliwan's run rampant

Mostly the same, they open the chest, get the key fragment, finds out its for promethea

*crew goes to promethea*

Maliwan acquisition occurring, "ah, so thaaaaats whyyy"

Tyreen butts into conversation

Reveals that they's motivated maliwan to do all this so as to show they hadnt screwed up just jakobs but maliwan and atlas too

But this time katagawa jr actually gets troy and tyreen onto the zanara, we think it'd be a good idea to get on there to kill all three at once, katagawa actually was gonna kill the calypsos, almost succeeds.

In the near death experience, tyreen tries to save herself, showing her lack of care of troy, straining relationship further, especially since the difficulties in eden six were shown earlier.

Calypsos escape, we escape zanara as it gets flooded with cov

Promethea vault timeee

It'll be graveward, since we know what the calypsos will do

Tannis has the trick

Lilith goes along to, by suggestion of maya

Major character death, i reckon lilith and it badly impact maya

Axton tries to fill leadership from then on out but does so with lighthearted positivity that isnt fitting and brings him down in the dumps with the rest of the crew too

Ava (instead of lashing out on lilith) tries a "what she would have wanted"

Rest of the plot stays as is until having stopped tyreen, then comes the core of my pitch

:remember tales from the borderlands

::remember the eye of helios???

:::we bringin it back bby

So elpis is comin toward pandora and the hunters need a real solution, not some deus ex siren-a

Vaughn goes all "hey, remember the-" to rhys

*rhys rattles his brain for a sec and goes all "OH YEAAAH, I 'member dat"*

They head on down to the same ol wreckage, maybe loader bot'll be there for a nice reunion with rhys, vaughn and zer0.

They gotta start it up but need power

Something-something-balex

Something-something-sanctuary power siphoning

Hit the button, blast elpis, save pandora

-I feel like the rushed nature of the promethea conflict felt fast, not that it alone is a problem but after being capped off with maya's passing and followed up by cheerful callbacks to fan favorites in a slow reclamation thing on eden-6 feels weird, especially when nobody at all that knew maya from the sanctuary moment of silence onward reacts to maya's death.

-marcus and moxxi barely do anything in the story, why are they there

-The appearances from the planets like rhys, vaughn, loreli, zer0, hammerlock, wainwright, clay, and b-team all disappear once they're done getting help from you, you'd think even some of them would be interested in the whole great vault thing for one reason or another but no, they just evaporate.

-also why do the maliwan armies look so dahl/tediore, the only thing maliwan about them are their robots, multi element throwers and light travel tech.

[lenalvthor]

Ayyyyy, so idk of this is the right blig, but if you wanted ideas for little mini fics relating to the hsau, I'd love to see how Sara and Ava's relationship was before the whole thing with Ava's coming out. Anyway, I love the fic and I hope you have a wonderful day!

hi!! 💛apologies for leaving this in my inbox for so long, this last week has been a ROLLERCOASTER but i promise you, i did see this and get very excited abt it and send it to rachel and we were both freaked out a bit abt getting prompts for the fic

so we have many, many ideas about pre-fic avalance in this au. like Many. many to the point that we don’t have the time to write an actual mini fic about it because the fic would be the furtherest thing from mini. also, bc it would be rlly weird to have to try and go back and write them before all of this, like we go back and read ‘don’t you like you’ and everything feels so strange bc we wrote it before we had this big detailed plan for everything that was gonna happen between them and it just feels crazy that they were in this place where they weren’t even friends let alone in love 

but what i am gonna do. is give you a fuckload of bullet headcanons instead. so i hope that suffices bc buckle up, there’s gonna be a few 🌈🌈

so ava and sara don’t go to the same elementary school. they’re both star city natives though so they kind of know of each other. sara did dance when she was little and was in layla’s dance class and ava was sometimes there when barbara came to pick her up etc etc. 

(ava’s school was a little nicer, was the fancier star city school that barbara teaches at. damien insisted nora went there bc of it’s good reputation and gary’s mom wanted the best possible start for her son, hence how the three of them ended up there and became friends) 

so by the time middle school comes around and they actually become a part of each other’s spheres, they know the other vaguely by name and the like 

in middle school, ava and sara meet and they don’t quite get along but they don’t rlly know each other so it’s not an issue - sara’s this reckless trouble maker that ava wants nothing to do with bc she wants to just do well and be liked and successful and normal while sara’s off getting into fights and sneaking out of school and never doing anything by the rules, so not interacting pretty much suits them both just fine

until in 8th grade, after spencer leaves to join the army and ava’s still trying to piece herself back together and he left around the time that she decides she was going to quit basketball after this season and she was scared she might be gay and starts vehemently ignoring any and all possibilities of that fact - that’s when sara lance comes out as bi

and sara doesn’t know why ava suddenly makes a point to argue with her more than usual, or call her out in her bullshit, or just be a general pain in the ass but she is, and what sara doesn’t realise is that ava’s angry that sara came out bc it put ava in a position where we had to actually confront herself abt her sexuality

sara has a quiet suspicion of why ava’s acting like this, and it would sort of make sense that ava would be gay (or bi, but sara thinks gay) but also she doesn’t wanna assume so she leaves it and just pushes ava’s buttons just as hard 

but it’s not all bad, bc the day nyssa and sara start dating, everyone at school is talking about it and ava knows her friends will be too and she’s terrified bc she doesn’t want to know if they think it’s weird, but kuasa just goes “whoa, no way” and lily whistles and says “damn, they’re probably the hottest couple at school” and gary doesn’t say anything but he’s got this look of curiosity and relief on his face and nora is looking at him carefully before she just glances over at sara and says “good for them” and ava doesn’t know if she wants to laugh or cry with relief

(and it’s still 2 and half years before she even tells nora - the first person she comes out to - but it’s a start at least) 

ava and sara get better for a bit in 8th grade, but then high school happens and suddenly they’re in the same homeroom and heaps of classes together and being partnered / grouped up for projects all the time and they both just get on each other’s nerves to no end

both of them are vying to be rip’s favourite in class and it makes ava furious and sara so smug because ava wanted to be the teachers pet bc she worked hard and did a load of extra curriculars and was always polite and on time and we’ll behaved, whereas rip just liked sara because she was entertaining and good at soccer and a little too cocky for her own good

and around this time, sara is slowly becoming friends with amaya and ray and jax and nate, is being less reckless and dangerous and unbearable as she was in middle school, starting to mellow a bit

but anyway; they’re at each other’s throats all of freshman year but their rivalry ends up being kind of fun bc arguing in class when it’s actually about school isn’t as frustrating for all the teachers and sara notices that ava actually makes her think, makes her feel smart, bc she can actually kind of keep up with the smartest girl in their entire grade, and ava meanwhile realises that sara is actually pretty smart, she’s actually kind of a genius and if she actually tried, she could probably give ava a run for her money and that both infuriates and pleasantly surprises ava 

but then early sophomore year, nyssa leaves. sara’s not at school for a few days and by the time she comes back, everyone Knows because it’s high school and nothing can stay secret for long, and everyone’s trying not to gossip bc sara’s slowly become quite popular around school but they can’t help it, they all wanna know what’s going on

and ava detests sara but she’s always admired her for coming out, for being so proud abt it and dating nyssa when there was like a grand total of 3 other lgbt people at school all of whom fit every single stereotype that ava wanted nothing to do with (and she’ll never admit it, but she had always felt kind of safe and comforted knowing nyssa and sara were dating bc it made her feel like she would be ok one day), so she can’t even imagine how sara feels especially if the rumours about why nyssa left are true 

sara’s heartbroken and angry and confused and she keeps pushing ava with jabs and mocking retorts and remarks that are lot harsher and more biting than usual but ava just smothers the urge to respond and rolls her eyes pointedly and ignores her bc she knows sara’s just lashing out

and at one point in gym, sara just drops her back and turns to face ava and demands “what the fuck is your problem sharpe?” and ava crosses her arms and goes “pretty sure you’re the once with the problem here, lance.” to that, sara glares and spits out “i’m not the one walking around with this fucking holier than thou attitude as if you’re better than me. can you at least argue back instead of rolling over like a doormat?” and ava literally wants to throw a dodgeball at her but she just holds her ground, doesn’t say anything, keeps sara’s gaze before biting her lip and looking away for the briefest of seconds. sara makes this smug huff of triumph, as though ava’s abt to fight back but ava just looks back at sara with an expression that’s too gentle, and says “i’m sorry about nyssa, sara.” and goes to join her dodgeball team

(amaya comes over to ask sara what it was about and sara can’t bring herself to answer, just shakes her head because she doesn’t quite know what just happened) 

things get better quickly, like. sara would never say it at the time but zari is this refreshing burst of fresh air who didn’t know nyssa the way all her other friends did and it’s so nice to have her around, even tho she’s still quite new. and then wally comes to star city and everything is fun and exciting w the legends and things aren’t perfect, definitely not bc oliver and laurel break up and sara and laurel have been fighting just usually like sisters do and dinahs been calling, on saras ass abt her slipping grades at school and sara just wants to piss them both off so she hooks up w oliver (and they’ve known each other for so long that they both feel guilty abt it and they try to make it a Thing bc they don’t want to admit that they both just used each other for different reasons)

it it’s sometime after that, after she and oliver collapsed under the very weak foundation their relationship was already built on, after laurel starts dating tommy, after amaya promises sara she’s not a bad person for what happened with oliver, it’s sometime then that ava makes that challenging retort abt sara even trying to get a better grade than her in french

and all sara can think of is laurel, the way laurel hadn’t been mad when she hooked up with oliver, the way laurel had just snuck into her room late at night and slipped under the covers and hugged sara close as sara broke down abt why their mom just didnt care abt all the good things sara was doing, the way laurel had softly murmured “you’re brilliant sara. you are, you’re so smart and so capable and if mom can’t see that, then she doesn’t deserve to.”

so sara does try. and she gets an a+. and the beam on laurel’s face when she sees it on sara’s desk, the pride on quentin’s when sara tells him - sara never looks back (and she also starts to look a bit more at ava, because maybe she’s not all horrible) 

gary comes out at the very end of sophomore year, sara goes over to give him a hug and she sees the expression on ava’s face - proud and protective and kind but also sort of hurt and definitely, definitely jealous, and sara suddenly remembers the way ava had acted towards her after sara had first come out and she remembers her vague, kind of unfounded assumption that maybe ava was gay, realises that ava’s never had a boyfriend, never said yes to any of the numerous attractive guys who have asked her out 

but also, sara’s known ava for like, 4 years by now and she knows what kind of family ava has and she feels this sudden ache in her chest bc ava must be in the most difficult position - sara doesn’t even know if ava is aware of it, so she doesn’t wanna say anything or offer support (also bc ava still grinds her gears to no end)

but she just keeps an eye out, checks ava’s facebook / instagram every once in a while to see if she’s posted anything abt it or added smth like a pride flag to her bio

and then on a sunday evening in october junior year, ava comes out on facebook. sara doesn’t see it first, in fact, she’s lying on the living room couch trying to not fall asleep reading her social studies text book when from the armchair, laurel lets out a quiet “huh” and both quentin and sara say “what?” at the same time and laurel goes “ava sharpe’s in your grade, right sara?” and sara nods and quentin’s like “is that the girl you did that chem assignment with earlier in the year?” and sara wrinkles her nose and goes “unfortunately. she’s a pain in my ass.” and laurel just hums and says “well, she just came out.”

sara almost falls off the couch, scrambling into a sitting position and snatching laurel’s phone and ignoring laurel’s protesting “hey!”

she reads the post through several times before she goes to comment and realises she’s on laurel’s phone, grabbing her own but then she hesitates, wanting to write something genuine but it feels too vulnerable so instead goes “ffs sharpe, on top of everything else, i now have to compete with you for hot girls too?”, but she opens messenger and goes “hey, just wanted to say congrats on coming out. i know it’s nowhere near easy to tell your family so like, hope that went okay. and i’m here if you wanna talk abt it at all.”

and the day after, as they’re clearing up microscopes and stuff in bio, ava quietly thanks her for her message and sara shrugs, goes “i get it.” and ava pauses before quietly admitting “you know i always admired you for being out. especially when we were so young back in middle school. i’d only just started thinking about it then and … i was a mess. seeing you being out and happy and just - the same person you’d always been … that helped more than you know.”

and it’s probably the most meaningful conversation they’ve ever had (or at least had in a Long time)

and 4 days later, ava shows up on sara’s doorstep after a fight with her mom at dinner and this entire fic began. 

also, for your own reading pleasure, some other random moments we thought of; 

sara only ever called ava ‘sharpe’ or ‘sharpie’ or any other variation of her name until they were both 15/16

ava used to roll her eyes every time sara got a a bad grade because she could be so much better if she tried, but she doesnt

sara nearly started a fight the first time she and ava had to work together on a project, and once they started it and it became clear they worked well together she was the Most Annoyed™️

back in middle school ava always scoffed and made some patronising comment every time she watched someone break up a fight sara had gotten into (except for the one time in the first few weeks of class when she had to stop sara throwing her second, or maybe third punch at a homophobic jerk in their class who’d cornered her on the way back from school - that time she shoved him away and watched him go before turning and cautiously asking if sara was okay, and sara glared at her and told her she’d had everything under control before storming off in the opposite direction)

there are probably many many headcanons for this part of the universe that we will think of but i hope this suffices for now, feel free to come yell about anything legends / fic related bc this was so much fun 💖💞