#ok legit i think this is my favorite drawing of all for this challenge by far!!

[marinerainbow]

YAAAASSSSSS WE ARE MAKING THIS HAPPEN FOLKS ✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️

New challenge. Draw Reala wearing this dress

[59writes]

THE DRAW (PART ONE)

(PART TWO)

if you’re reading this as like an actual fic: first of all I’m sorry. how did you end up here. it’s most definitely 2 am go to bed. this fic was literally made because of a fucking uquiz about “ what kpop boy are you enemies to lovers with”

second of all, ignore any chess mistakes. idk I know legit fuckall about chess, my brother just always bitches about it whenever I want to stop playing because I just have my king left or smth like that because I know I’ve lost. mf reads chess books.

like look: I UNDERSTAND the game and how it works, and the idea that you have to think ahead and plan. but I’m adhd as shit and there’s no such thing as time or planning. ergo, I suck. like I SUCK. I feel like if I applied myself I’d be great but fuck that. I’m a bad chess player and y’all gotta deal.

third: I mention League Of Legends at one point. I’m so cringe yes shut up ok but I’ve been special interest-ing League for several months now and I need to let you know that Josh, y/n, and Jeonghan play a mean jungler/adc/support combo (respectively). I have so many more headcanons typed in my draft or whatever but I know nobody wants to see it so

anyways pls enjoy this train wreck of a fic lol

If you had known playing chess would have led to this bullshit, you never would have started playing in the first place.

You wouldn’t have worked your ass off, wouldn’t have pored through strategy books and watched live-streamed games, wouldn’t have competed for months to become an official grandmaster. Absolutely not. None of that hard work and pride deserved to be wasted on Yoon Jeonghan.

Thanks to your exceptional academics and study habits, as well as your headlining pursuits in chess, private schools crawled to your front door and begged for you to give them money just so they could brag about having you as arm candy. You didn’t care. It was free scholarships, a chance to leave your tiny town, a chance to start anew with people just like you. If you were lucky, they wouldn’t know your fame status, or would be used to the junk by now. Some would probably be even more popular than you.

So you grabbed a paper, scribbled a signature on, and packed your bags.

You had picked an academy for the arts, as logic games apparently counted as one. They figured they could do something with your whimsical essay writing as well, submit you in scholastic contests. It didn’t matter. You were free, and there to play some goddamn chess.

They had a hardcore club there, meeting daily on weekdays and occasionally for casual play on the weekends. Everyone there was excellent, all clever players with quick logic and a competitive edge that you hadn’t seen in a while. It was refreshing, but still not enough of a challenge.

You swept the floor with your classmates, and rose to the top of the club’s rankings within a week.

Of course you lost games here and there, as everyone did, but for the most part any game you began was imbalanced from the beginning. Your opponent could at best only defend themselves, only able to pick off pawns or bait bishops that inevitably ended in a brutal checkmate.

You were top of the class, and for once it took some effort. You felt like you’d earned something, and you were actually interacting with serious chess players who wanted to learn, not fawn over your work. They played fair and every game was fun.

That was until the blond bitch came in.

He sauntered into the class about a month after you’d hit the top of the leaderboard, long blond hair tied back in a neat and slick ponytail. You barely noticed, immersed in a game with another boy, Joshua. You studied the board as your opponent looked up, grinning wildly.

“Jeonghan!” He called out, waving at the other boy.

Jeonghan’s ponytail whipped across his shoulder as he turned, matching Josh’s smile with a killer beam of his own and jogging over.

“‘Shua!” He chirped, playfully wrapping an arm around Joshua’s neck, strangling him while his other hand smooshed Josh’s hair around.

You watched them wrestle for a second before clearing your throat. “Josh, your move.”

“Aw shit.” Josh says, wrestling Jeonghan’s arm away from his shoulder. “Back to the ass kicking.”

You grin. “If you hadn’t made that dumb move literally third turn in-“

“Hey! We are NOT talking about that!”

You snort and glance at Jeonghan, who’s gone quiet, studying the board. He crouches down and whispers in Josh’s ear, both of them scanning the board. Josh finally nods, pushing one of his pawns forward.

“What was that about, Hong?” You ask, capturing said pawn with a neat L from your knight.

“Nothing.” He replies sweetly, while Jeonghan smirks.

“Sure it wasn’t.”

Josh doesn’t reply. The rest of the game is tensely quiet, interrupted only by Jeonghan murmuring into Joshua’s ear every few minutes, a devil on his shoulder.

But it was fine, you were ahead by a few pieces, your bishops slowly inching towards a checkmate. The next move was it, the game in the bag.

And then your queen is gone.

Jeonghan takes the liberty of removing it from the board with a proud smile while Joshua cackles.

The game doesn’t last much longer, soon the both of you down to just pawns and your king, and then just the kings. A draw.

And let’s be honest here: Joshua kinda sucks at chess.

Josh counted it as a victory, though, hitting Jeonghan with a high five that echoed around the classroom like a firecracker. The boys talked briefly while you set up the board again for the next duo and packed your bag, ready to head to your dorm for a much-needed nap.

You wave to Joshua and turn to go, only making it a few steps before someone grabs your wrist. You whip around, ready to tell them off, only to be met with Jeonghan interrupting whatever swear you were about to say with a sharp smile.

“I’m playing you on Monday.”

He lets go of your wrist and turns around, resuming his talk with Josh as if nothing happened.

Rubbing your wrists ruefully, you headed home.

•••

Of course, his bullshit didn’t stop there.

You did, in fact, play him on Monday. He had you cornered within five minutes.

The next time, in four.

He gathered a crowd a few games in. Every time you’d meet his gaze he’d smirk, eyes brimming with some sort of superiority that made you furious, always endlessly cool and calm. He’d flick his hair over his shoulder every so often, even stopping to talk to spectators while you puzzled over the board, trying to hide your stress.

You were second place by Wednesday.

•••

“You cheated.”

Jeonghan just raises a brow.

“Put the rook back.” You growl, firm.

“Sorry?” He ignores your request, instead poking at one of your previously captured pawns he has resting on the table next to him. “Can you move? I’ve almost got checkmate.”

“My rook, Yoon.” You hold out your hand. “Give it back, or put it back yourself. H6.”

“I really don’t know what you’re talking about. Do you resign? If we were using a timer you’d have been disqualified sometime last week.”

It’s taking every ounce of self control to not slap the living shit out of the smug bastard. “Jeonghan, if you don’t-“

“How’s the game going here?” The chess club leader had made her way to your table, grinning widely upon seeing her favorite students.

Jeonghan smiles kindly at her while you curl in on yourself, trying not to explode. “It’s fine, Ms. Lee. Almost done with this one.”

“Are you missing a piece? Looks like the black rook-“

“Must have fallen off the table.” Jeonghan chirps, ducking under the table and returning with the piece in hand. He sets it with the rest of his captured black army, sending a thumbs up at Ms. Lee. “Thanks for noticing, we don’t need to lose any more pieces.” It’s an innocent sentence, but it makes you turn a boiling red. Lose a piece, my ass.

“Well played, both of you.” She replies, patting Jeonghan on the head fondly before walking off. The blond rolls his eyes, ducking his head so Ms. Lee can’t see.

“Jeonghan, you asshole.” You hiss as soon as Ms. Lee is out of earshot. “I saw you take it out of your pocket, you lying-“

“If you’re not moving, I’m going to.” Jeonghan replies, moving his bishop forward to capture your queen. “Checkmate. Good game.”

You can only gape as he grabs your hand to shake it and walks off, approaching Joshua.

That was when you really knew you hated him.

•••

You studied his games from then on, partially to learn, partially to gather evidence. If he was cheating this consistently with other players, you could definitely get him kicked out of the club and subsequently your life once competition season started, as well as learn and potentially steal his strategies.

Infuriatingly, though, every single game he played besides the hellish ones with you were completely fair. No pieces being slipped into his thin hands when nobody was looking, no clock taps that discreetly took a few seconds from his opponent’s timer. Even with Josh, who he was best buddies with: not even a joking steal or a prank of any kind.

It was just with you.

Every single game you played together, he managed to do something to piss you off, if not blatantly cheat. If it was one of the days you had spectators, his harassment would come in the form of heavy looks and obnoxious “I’m waiting”-esque moves: tapping his nails on the desk, raising a brow, checking his watch.

And if you were alone, you basically had to glue your pieces down to the board to stop them from slipping their way into his pockets. It was obvious when he did it, too, always sending you a smile, too innocent.

It was infuriatingly adorable how proud he was of his nasty behavior. And he was focused too: none of his other opponents got the thought and effort he put into outwitting you and attempting to steal things without you noticing. As much as you hated him, you had to admire it.

Which is why it was so hard to finally draw a line and refuse to play with him anymore.

Though he shrugged when you put your foot down, his dark eyes watched you the rest of that club session. Every time you caught him, he held your gaze for a moment before looking away and resuming cheerfully animated conversation with his opponent.

God, how was he so easily likeable?

He respected your decision, though, and didn’t even attempt to talk to you. It was genuinely polar and strange, and it made you lost in thought as the months passed.

You almost missed the absence of anger, as stupid as it was. School had always been boring and simple, and chess with Jeonghan was the only thing to have made you frustrated in a long time, to have truly challenged you in a long time.

Even when you buckled down on trying to get him out of your head, he seemed to follow- being friends with Joshua (and honestly most of the other club members) almost always devolved into chats about the club and “why aren’t you playing Jeonghan anymore?”. Josh often suggested playing video games with the two of them, and you had to refuse (although playing League with Josh was so fun).

It was lonely.

Stupid Jeonghan.

•••

Finally, tournament season started.

Following (what was apparently) club tradition, the entire team dyed their hair between practices. You settled with a simple streak of blue that was stolen from Josh (he went completely teal, the madman).

The next day, Jeonghan came to practice with his blond ponytail gone, replaced by a dark brown undercut, hair bluntly chopped to end around his jaw.

Unfortunately, it suited him.

He saved a blond spot for a bit of Josh’s blue, however, and Josh dyed it for him in the middle of the clubroom, laughing the whole time. They’d planned it, clearly, as you were pretty sure Josh didn’t just carry around dye in his backpack.

Which means he knew you two would match when he did your hair.

It was confirmed by an apologetic shrug when you cornered him while he threw away the dye-stained gloves.

“Give him a chance, please y/n?”

“Hong Jisoo. You know how I feel about that dumbass-“

“y/n-“

“Why are you so insistent on having us talk again? He’s a two-faced-“

“y/n, you’d like him. He’s funny, and genuinely nice. I don’t know why he was acting like that with you, but that was almost three months ago. Give him a chance.”

“You should be glad I like you, you stupid fucking rat.”

Josh laughs as you walk away, fuming.

Unfortunately, you did like that stupid fucking rat, and so when he offered dinner after an out-of-state tournament (he pinky swore he’d pay) you finally gave in.

Jeonghan coming?

lol yea

that ok?

not rlly

I’ll give him a chance tho

:D thank u

you owe me

I’m buying ur food :(

josh we r literally getting fast food

you owe me

lol k >:)

[actingwithportals]

i Wanted to ask for the lifeblood creature but ive realized theres like... nothing for them so uuh either them or shine for the ask thing, whichever you prefer

Ok I wanted to answer for Lifeblood creature but tbh I’d have to sit and think about them for a long while cause as of yet I’ve got very little thoughts on them, so I’ll be doing Shine!

Why I like them

Their vibes Immediately caught my attention when they first showed up tbh, probably more distinctly than any of the other BVs. Their design is extremely unique, from their horns to their cloak to the fact that they have the iridescent wings and a tail. So much about them sparked immediate joy and interest, and now after getting to know their character a little more they just got more lovable to me. Their personality is also just so fun and different from a lot of the other BVs, like they feel very much like they fit into their own box of something wilder and more free, and I think that’s incredibly enjoyable to see!

Why I don’t

There isn’t much I dislike about them, but I would like to see them open up a bit more? But that is admittedly because I myself want to see more of them, know more about how they work and what makes them tick, what their goals and hopes and interests are. I wanna see them allow themself to be a bit more vulnerable, but that is much more related to character arc progression and really isn’t much of a critique at all.

Favorite episode (scene if movie)

That moment in the Brokenverse rp of them staying with Lost was,,,, really touching tbh. I think that moment said a bit about them, and for that little while we got to see a side of Shine that they might not otherwise show to others. I think that was neat as fuck.

Favorite season/movie

I am REALLY interested to know more about the Iri AU all around, particularly about how Shine’s experiences with the Radiance goes in your story in comparison to canon!

Favorite line

I legit cannot think of any at this moment, but I see this merely as a challenge to someday experience what will be my favorite line from them

Favorite outfit

THAT ART YOU DID OF THEM IN THE RIDICULOUS CROP TOP WILL FOREVER BE ICONIC but I truly am very partial to their cloak. I just think it’s absolutely gorgeous and I would love to draw it someday

OTP

I’ve got absolutely nothing to put here

Brotp

In their canonverse I’d have to say them and Whisper. Brokenverse tho? Shine and Brokey tbh. I get good friend vibes from those two

Head Canon

I feel like Shine would like jazz, and they’d probably be great at dancing too. They just have these really fun and exciting vibes that I think would go very well with that

Unpopular opinion

I’ve Got None chief 

A wish

Wanna see,,, them kick ass in a fight,,,,,,

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen

Gonna agree with what Spot said for this in that I really hope nothing terrible ever happens to them like what’s happened to the other BVs. I want them to stay safe in a way the others haven’t, cause there’s just this spark about them that I’d be afraid of growing dim if something like that did occur. 

5 words to best describe them

Feral, spritely, dazzling, suspicious, uncertain

My nickname for them

Feral Cat is just iconic

I hope I did this Wonderful Being justice

[thebluejaysworld]

👀😳🔎😪🤷‍♀️📝

finally getting to this XD Okie, here we go! This is really long... So I’m going to put it under read more.

- A piece I tried something new:

This was the first time I tried experimenting with the symmetry tool, more stable lines, and coloring on different layers! It was a lot of fun to do and really helped me in the long run! (Oc belongs to @inspiredrawaw , as this was part of an art trade! Still have their piece as my lockscreen btw XD)

- A piece that turned out better than I was expecting:

this is a tough one, because there are just so many. But I think I’m gonna go with

this was super challenging for me to draw and even now it doesn’t really register that it’s my own art. But I’m still really happy with the way it turned out XD

- A detail I’m really proud of

I’m really proud of this one in general, but especially since A) it’s a redraw from when I was in a very different place artistically. and B) all the effects and poses that I was able to put into it.

Although a close second would have to be-

because of all the detail/thought pu into the design that I was never gonna use. (But That you have welcomed with open arms XD)

- A (writing) piece that was meant to be short but took on a life of it’s own

All of Shadowed Hearts! It was supposed to be a quick “ok this is Jane and Phoenix’s backstory. So that we can move onto them being youtubers. Meanwhile Ian sorta raises Talon on his own as one off stories”! But did My brain let me have that? No XD Now I’m writing a novel XD (and I’m so glad!)

(Also technically an entire fic I accidentally wrote with @seagullsausage called “Prices to pay” Put It’s not actually written written... Nor is it posted XD)

- Favorite POV I wrote this year

Honestly, I didn’t actually write much this year. And what I have, I’ve really enjoyed. So I guess it’s a threeway tie between the crossover (I think that was this year XD), “The hero in Red”, And The story with Dare and Dee.

- A line or paragraph I’m really happy with

“He startles as he hears the door unlock. He jumps up. Ready to run and greet his mother and the red hero she spoke of. But when the door opens, his mother isn’t there. But, instead, just a man. A man with dark hair, and dark eyes. Who smiled at him. Wide and with interest. But without the warmth of his mother. But upon closer inspection… He was definitely covered in red. Was that what his mother had meant?”

This paragraph still legit gives me shivers. (It’s from “The hero in Red” btw)

[theshitthatidoishere]

Ask post owo

DoloresdaizhamorganI said: i refuse to believe Neji died. Although I did have a really bizarre dream that during the war, an outbreak spread causing the deceased shinobi, our beloved Neji included, to come back as vampires who WERE NOT susceptible to sunlight, a steak to the heart, nor anything common to end a vampire. Yeah, that's what happens when you've been binging vampire horror for three straight weeks with no interruptions. Btw, NejiTen is amazing and beautiful.

1. What r u talking abt?? neji didn’t die he’s alive and happy and alive 👌

2.hhshahshah ok that’s a weird dream but i admit that neji vampire sounds cool

3. Totally agree

@spaneji-roll has said: What if Neji, tenten and Lee would be secret agents like that one skit in naruto SD? I think we all know tenten would be the bad ass one, Lee would almost get killed with every impulsive decision he would make but he'd come out fine and Neji. Neji is just James bond but better because he's Neji.

Omg yeEeeEeeEeEeeeEs i like this sm, and i love the outfits of that skit too so perfect ✨✨

Why do you ship nejiten? Tenten didn't even cry when Neji died. She just recalled him when Guy and Lee were making a fuss. She said,"Why did you leave me Neji?" Or something along those lines. I don't see any romantic aspect in their relationship. They were just teammates who respected each other. P. S. This is not a hate ask towards Nejiten or what you believe in. I want to know your opinion because yours is the only Nejiten blog I follow. P. S. S. I really like your art. It's so beautiful.

Guys if i could tell i really would but the thing is that i don’t even know what i like nt, once i was seeing papabay’s art on Pinterest (not knowing who papabay was xd) and i said “wow this shit is good” and i ended obsessed just like with everything that i like lmao ;_;

Idk i just like that if they were in a relationship it would be so GOOD AND NOT TOXIC LIKE THE OTHER NART RELATIONSHIPS, like just vibing and respecting to each other, but idk just my brain daydreaming xd

Also thank u sm🥺💙🥺💙💙

Hc that hizashi and gai knew each other before the incident...

Y E S but hizashi and gai are in different generations so idk how...maybe a mission?

That scene where baby neji is training with hizashi....HES LIKE A LITTLE TEDDY BEAR IS SO CUTE !!!

What do you think of LeeSaku?

Sakura deserved better and lee too so yeah i like it ���

Do you want to hear a song rec? :33

Sure owo

I SCREAMED

I don’t remember with what drawing i got this ask but thank you and sorry🥺🥺🥺🥺💙💙

That is legit the funniest hate ask I have seen, like you need to know your philosophy to understand my insult, p e a s a n t

I still don’t understand if it was a hate ask or just a meme ngl

search deadname remover on chrome web store that might help úwù

I would use that if i had a computer bc it doesn’t let me in the ipad :’(

After Hiashi dies hizashi is waiting there with a Gun.

I WILL HAVE HIASHIS HEAD SO HELP ME GOD-!!!

NANI???!!!

What’s art style bend?

It’s an artist challenge where you have to do a drawing without all the characteristics that define your art style owo

Til that I’m actually taller than hiashi idk why that’s so funny to me but it is...

Hiashi smol hiashi smol

Imagine hiashi get kicked in the head...literally

Yes please....

I accidentally read that birthday post as habirth ppyday, And was very confused. then I realized I was a fuckin moron and read it right, but anyway, habirth ppyday mel since I’m too much of a coward to say it in their inbox

@meloodles happy late bd from part of this anon xddd

Can I PLEASE get a waffle can I PLEASE get a fuckign waffle

🧇🧇🧇

Would you like an egg?

Yes ngl 🍳

wha t does "omnipotenttable mean?

It’s from a nickname that i had a few years ago, when i was making my ig account with some friends they were like “let’s put you table” and i said “just if you put omnipotent before”, and that’s it xd

Rock lee more like broccoli

What’s your favorite brush?

what art piece do you feel proudest of?

This two owo

Have you watched into the woods? Idk I think it’s a pretty good musical.

Nup i haven’t, usually i don’t like musicals but maybe I’ll give it a try

Hey I hope you’re ok, sending you love 💕💕💕

I’m fine now but who knows when I’ll feel like poop again ;-;, I’m trying to not and take advantage of the days that i feel good 💙💙

Does Chile celebrate Labor Day?

Yes we do!

hey i read your tw post and just wanted to send u some love!! pls try to hang in there. i love u and i wanna wake up and see ur art again! i wanna see u interact with asks again! i know hope is hard to come by and even harder to keep but it really is the only thing we can do in times like this. please hang in there! i love you!! ❤❤❤❤💕💗💗💞💓💓💓

You motivated me to answer all the ask today so thank you sm 💙💙🥺💙🥺💙🥺, I’m doing my best I’m almost two days without skin picking myself, i’ll try as much as i can i promise 💙💙, love ya

@catkinies has said : YOUR HEADER!!!! GOLD!!! HANABABY!!! ❤️❤️❤️

We gave explosives to hanababy xddd 🤯🤯

i searched ctm and SHELL YOUR MOTHER??? guess i cant complain but WHAT

Jahsjjakajajja this is a CLASSIC, i would say that’s similar to motherfucker but not really 😔👊

[deathdesu]

character: D i o

BUT OF COURSE…. thanks for asking! 

general opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine I guess | like them! | love them | actual love of my life hotness level: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoretically hot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would bang

If I hadn’t been made aware that the art book calls him an ikemen type, I would have had no idea he was supposed to be hot. I can see how he is (pretty eyes, a tall blonde, a strong voice) but the circus clothes are pretty bad, braids objectively bad even though I kinda like them in a viking-y way, and the curves in his lips always made me think he looked a bit like a frog or maybe a cat.  Doesn’t stop me from drawing sexy art of him tho lol. 

hogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuff

Good now I can publicly explain why I made him Gryffindor on my recent chart. First of all I think it would be really pigeonholing him to put him in Slytherin. “There are dark wizards in every house” as they say. In Dio ending, he tells Phi and Sigma that he’s like a superhero - and in Japanese, the word he used was “seigi no mikata” aka Ally of Justice, showing that he would view himself the way a Gryffindor does. He’s far more brash than he is ever cunning and he’s ruled by his emotions a lot of the time. It simply looks off since he’s a cultist who’s worshipping a Slytherin. As such, Peter Pettigrew is a really good example of the type of Gryffindor Dio is.   

best quality: He’s the most quotable character in the game by a country mile, and his presence in the various routes is just as bombastic. (pun intended.) Dio ending itself is incredibly memorable just for the sheer surprise of his backstory. Who would ever expect that the circus guy dropping F-bombs all the time was a religious nut? Just imagine this guy having a quiet boring church life most of the time and then really cutting loose for his infiltration projects. No wonder he did a swear so many times. He’s hilarious.  worst quality:  I’m kinkshaming his planet fetish- ok that’s jokey, but do I really have to spell it out? What an asshole. There really isn’t anything that you could say is Low Even For Him, he’ll do it all ship them with: Well the most popular pairing for him is Dio/Luna, which is a pairing that I get and that I accept. It’s not ideal for me though, I’m more inclined to think Luna deserves better. My favorite person to ship Dio with requires some finagling to get around the crossover timelines, but it’s Dio/Mira. They’re about even in terms of being terrible so they’d deserve to put up with each other, they’ve both got connections to Brother which could put them in contact or at least be fun and mysterious, and I know for a fact they’d find each other entertaining. Dio is a lot like Eric but worse (so while this isn’t my opinion necessarily, anyone that thinks Eric deserves better than Mira, this ship could also be for you, I recommend Carlos/Eric as a side for your Dio/Mira) …Meanwhile Dio is attracted to “feisty women” perhaps someone who is like Alice but worse. As a note, I definitely think Dio would be attracted to Alice but also I would never ship Dio/Alice, why would you when Alice/Clover is right there. Plus they have a more direct reason not to bang when he or another Myrmidon may have killed her father, yikes.  There are other parallels between them, like making animal metaphors, wearing red and dying of asphyxiation in a pod (like two peas!! Romantic!!!!!!) but this section is already embarrassingly 3x times longer than the others so just trust me that they���re a good match and let’s move on. The direction this ship goes could be all sorts of things depending on how it was set up in the first place… I’d probably be happy with anything? Something like a hatemance would be tasty, though when I RP or draw it, I do tend to make it more positive, piranhas schooling together or whatever. It’s good shipping for if you’re more interested in exploring their villainy than rehabilitation, though I firmly believe they both would be capable of reaching the latter with just eachother as well, it would just take some time and positioning. Maybe copious use of Mira’s willingness to challenge her own beliefs to inspire change in Dio’s zealot approach, or another way, Dio wanting to become better when Mira may not be able to understand his feelings otherwise. 

brotp them with: I think Dio just needs to outsource to ZTD entirely because Carlos would be the nice respectful Gryffindor senpai he never knew he wanted. Like I just think way too much of him in this kind of crossover terms because of my main ship for him. However in canon, hmm. Luna would still be very, very good for him even if it wasn’t necessarily romantic. I also see him trying to bro it up with Sigma and I actually have no problem with that. Like Dio, Sigma and Phi all becoming weird friends after Dio tourguided them around the moon in his ending would be highly legit.  …I also have this RP bromance of Lenga’s Dio with my 707 from Mystic Messenger that works out because guess who already has life experience with a crazy cultist bro. needs to stay away from: NO ONE. SOONER OR LATER, EVERYBODY PUTS UP WITH DIO. I don’t make the rules

misc. thoughts:    no, I’ve already said too much

[chromsai]

Top 5 Arc V Moments.

OKay so this is very over due as hell I’m sorry like sincerely apologizing here. I don’t really have an excuse since I’ve known my definite favorite moments for a while, I just felt I had to… emotionally prepare myself to write all this out. And well

(it’s fucking June now…) as you can see it takes me a just a bit to become emotionally prepared for anything Arc V, especially so when it comes to deciding on JUST 5 Arc V moments but alright. Here they are:

5. Episodes 69 & 99 (tie): Melt My Heart

Yeah, I know I’m starting this list off with a tie just to emphasize how hard this is for me. Well anyway…

I’m choosing both of these episodes as a tie because my favorite thing about them both is, you guessed it!, fruitshipping.

Fruitshipping is, of course, my favorite pairing from Arc V (honestly, it’s my favorite in all of YGO in general by like… a really, REALLY long shot) and I’ve already talked about why episode 69 is my favorite fruitshipping moment from the entire show (tl;dr: it’s what made me go from casually shipping it to full blown “I WILL DROWN WITH THIS SHIP WITHOUT REGRET”) but the reason why I’m placing it tied to episode 99 in this list is of course because

this. Amazingly touching reunion. And although, yes it was short lived, nothing takes away how satisfying everything about this scene is, imo at least. Maybe you ship this, maybe you don’t. Either way, I’m not sure you can’t deny how heartwarming it is that Yuya isn’t holding back his feelings here. Okay, perhaps he is maybe slightly (goddamnit Yuya cONFESS ALREADY DAMNIT U DENSE BOY). Even the entire present cast finds it hella endearing:

Shingo’s satisfied look of approval pretty much confirms he ships it.Gongenzaka is beyond happy to see his best friends reunited, as they should be.Sora probably going thru the biggest sugar high of his entire goddamn life from how sweet this reunion is.

Look. At. Reira’s. Smile. Damn shoulda just shown baby Reira/Zarc a pic of fruitshipping… but then maybe Arc V would have ended 5 episodes sooner…Tsukikage, the cool stoic ninja, has been shipping this from the shadows but this scene was too perfect he dgaf about hiding it anymore.

Jack & Crow transcending shows just to show their approval of this ship.

Fruitshipping is all according to Reiji’s keikaku, and Shun seems glad he was awake to see this.

Not to mention my favorite part of this moment:

I get this is YGO and who knows if we’ll ever get an on-screen kiss but… the amount of time they stared directly into each other’s eyes without even blinking once, like… I know I wasn’t the only one who thought they were actually gonna kiss there for a moment… it’s symbolic of something, ya feel?

sweartogodithoughttheyreallywereandasiwatchediwasscreaming

This moment was too pure, too good, too heartwarming………

Anyways,,,

4. Episodes 31+32: A True ‘Entame’ Duel

Again, this is a moment I’ve talked about as being one of my favorite Yuya moments recently.

 There’s a lot I can add about why I love this duel (for example:

giving Shingo some character development as well as demonstrating that he actually really is a skilled duelist and a true entertainer in his own way, not just a follower or an imitator

Yuya using this duel to challenge himself and push himself to reaching for his father’s level of Entame Dueling which is his dream

the cliffhangers they left us off with at the end of ep 31, the one that happened at the beginning of 32 with Yuya diving into the collapsing castle (which, Idk about anyone else, but that legit got me anxious AF too cuz how unpredictable the duels in this show are sometimes) and of course the other one towards the end of the duel as he made his ‘destiny draw’ while calling for the audience to cheer him on, etc.

but what really makes this duel the textbook example of what makes Entame Duels so fun to watch is the flawless call and response (aka back & forths) between Shingo and Yuya and their absolute dedication to keeping the flow of their entertainment as intense and unpredictable (even for themselves) as possible.

Also, as far as YGO goes, there is always going to be moments where the protagonist has to rely on a ‘destiny draw’, but the way it was implemented in this show (pretty much always like this moment) was a really creative way that fits into the world and story-telling of the show extremely comfortably but also adding to the anticipation since both we AND the actual in-universe audience are expecting something BIG.

Another rewatch bonus here: the stark contrast between Yuya’s Entame Dueling vs Zarc’s vengeful, overpowering dueling- this duel is the prime example of everything that Zarc strived to achieve as an entertainer but was unfortunately ultimately swayed away from despite his true intentions.

Last note for this moment: this duel was will always hold a special place in my heart for happening at a time when I really needed it. It was a nice reminder to not be afraid to Take A Step Forward With Courage.

(Side note: this episode was also immediately followed by, without a doubt, the best written duel in Arc V: Shun vs. Sora, so that just added to this moment in retrospect due to the contrast between dueling for smiles & entertainment vs dueling for war & vengeance, which was brilliant considering these 2 duels perfectly showcase the 2 sides of of the single coin that is Arc V and its overall themes, so you could say that, yeah, MCS arc was fucking good.)

3. Episode 1 + 2: A Solid Intro that AWED

Alright, so I’m very aware that not everyone shares my opinion on this, but again this is a list based on my experience and perspective of Arc V so lol anyway,

Episode. 1.

I’ve told this story plenty of times before, I think, but I’ve left some details out. After watching + finishing Zxl (as it was airing, mind you) I was left feeling kinda… mostly… “meh” about YGO as a whole. The last few episodes of it, though, we got this a few times:

And I was kinda… also “meh” about it. *cries writing that*pastsaiyoufool Tbqh with you, my only reaction to him at first was “he’s riding a hippo while playing card games… does he even know what it means to be a YGO protag? Where is YGO going…” but it was also “eh, it’s YGO. Nothing’s changed probably.” Then, a certain someone was confirmed as “main rival” for Arc V and I was motivated to watch. “It’ll probably be just okay but I’m watching for Hosoyan,” I told myself, fucking clueless as fucking hell. “Plus this is the first time I get to watch a YGO RIGHT as it airs RIGHT from the start.”

So episode 1 finally came around and this happened

within the first… not even 2 mins in. And part of me was “ok” and the other part of me was nothatwasntcutethatwasnOTCUTEATALL*denial* (I am a known tsundere when it comes to the things I end up loving the most [see: Chrom, Shun, Zarc, etc.]). Then the next thing that caught my attention was:

. By now, I was internally being even more aggressively tsundere because Fuck that was cute… but he’s ridiculous! Dressing up like a clown?! NNNNO. though on the outside I just kept watching with a straight face like okay okay it’s the first episode, he’s allowed. I’m very dense too just like him.

My first impression of the duel was actually that it was rather okay & somewhat interesting for the most part and that the action cards seemed fun but oh boy a new gimmick but I continued watching, cuz again, I wanted to give it a chance.

My expectations, going into the show, were “this is just gonna be another silly, happy-go-lucky kinda theme, eh I already got thru Zxl so why not?” + no real expectations at all.

And then, 

this happened:

My first reaction: oH MY GOD LOOK AT THOSE EYESSS!!! (little did I know this was the beginning of my being zarctrash… yuuup… since episode. fcking. 1.)

I don’t know exactly why, at the time, and I don’t know about the rest of you but this was basically me right after:

Then the next episode continues the duel, Yuya wins, and again, I’m like

And to top that off, they give us this too:

First of all, that ending screencap of Yuya looking at the screen confidently right after he Pendulum summons for the first time and leaves everyone (including me) in shock… I’m sorry but, to me, THAT’S how you end a first episode. The animation. The soundtrack. The pacing and writing. Yuya’s sudden and mysterious (at the time) complete change of demeanor, along with the mystery of the Pendulum itself, is what left me in absolute awe, especially so seeing that even Yuya himself was not expecting it. It was all perfect. Then going on to the next episode and learning that Yuya suddenly had no idea what had just happened or where he even was… that got me hooked instantly.

But the ending to that first episode… haha… I started watching this show for Reiji Akaba and suddenly forgot he existed right after this moment happened. When he finally made his dramatic, opening double-doors + scarf flowing in the wind (in his office somehow?) debut, I was like “Oh sHIT there he is! Right… I was gonna watch this show for him… right…” Barely an episode in and I had completely forgotten why I was even watching anymore. I didn’t care. I just wanted to watch more. (And thankfully Reiji Akaba ended up also exceeding my expectations of his character like by a lot.)

I’ve seen this episode way too many times to count. I enjoy it thoroughly each and every time. But I honestly just really wish I could relive seeing it for the very first time. It was… such an incredible experience. To me, this is the best first episode of any YGO. I went in expecting nothing or even less than that and instead, fortunately, got everything I didn’t even know I ever wanted.

2. Episode 135: The Perfect Episode

I. Am an angst. Hoe.

Part of the reason why I enjoyed this show so much was because it gave me so much well-written angst that hit all the tropes I enjoy so much and then some.

This episode was and then some.

First of all, let me just address the fact that the duel between Yuri and Yuya was hyped and anticipated for 2 fucking years ever since Yuri was first revealed. Don’t lie, our first thought when we saw Yuri was “So WHEN are they gonna duel??!?” 

For 2. Entire. Years. This duel was hyped up, and I’ll even dare to say it was more anticipated than even the Yuri vs Yugo duel, honestly. Even up to the last minute. I can’t tell you the amount of polls and discussions I saw debating who would win the duel because not only was the duel hyped, after seeing the first half, (in keeping with the surprise nature of the show) the result was still pretty damn unpredictable (a lot of those polls I mentioned were split almost evenly half the time).

Then it finally happened.

And it delivered. My god did it deliver.

But alright, I know I titled this “The Perfect Episode” but yeah there was some flaws in the duel writing (Yuya, my boy, you forgot your monsters have Pendulum effects?, Yuri I get you were losing your shit too and just wanted to hitotsu ni but you also forgot to use your dragons’ effects or just didn’t bother, etc.) buuuut I’m going to call this off as somewhat realistic in the fact that when you’re feeling you’re going insane and panicking you just might not be able to think entirely straight and might miss a few card effects or so.

But besides that.

The animation for this episode, directed by Ebina, and the sound direction as well was spot fucking on. And the script throughout was…

Oh my god. The script throughout this episode…

Let’s just say, during the span of less than 24 minutes I

cried

and cried

and died cried.

A lot.

just getting those screenshots hurt… beyond words…

Major shout out to Kensho Ono for this scene in particular because. wow. 

(Side note 1: just in general, I thank the gods every day for casting Ono Ken as Yuya because I cannot think of anyone better to voice him ever. He left his own personal mark on Yuya’s character [Yuya’s “Ladies & Gentlemen!” was his own added touch and was not originally in the script, gods bless 🙌] + on the YGO series as a whole.

Side note 2: This is more of a personal one with regards to this scene in particular…I say often that I relate to Yuya a lot and let me just say that watching this scene was incredibly hard to watch through tears especially the first time around because, as someone who went through a terrible depressive episode that lasted months in 2014-2015, it just… reminded me… of that exact feeling… and I felt so. goddamn. horrible for Yuya… he never deserved that. Ever. This episode broke me so bad for a good while…)

Of course, I think the thing we all anticipated the most was… Zarc. We knew for certain that he would revive by the end of the duel. “How?” was the main question. Most speculation lead to the theory that Yuri would forcefully merge with Yuya despite losing, but that didn’t happen. Instead,

Zarc did it himself. Of course.

I think by the very end of the duel it was obvious but… that still didn’t stop me from spouting “no no they aren’t doing this tHEY AREN’T REALLY DOING THIS THEY CAN’T FUCKING DO THISSSS NOOOO!!!!” as he walked towards Yuri. And I knew exactly what was about to happen. And it still broke me anyway. And when Yuya’s Pendulum hit the ground

so did I.

*sniff* Fun times.

[Here is where I was gonna put some honorable mentions but the list was pretty damn long so I’m omitting it because honestly I’ll just end up listing like every single episode (besides episode 19 ofc well now y’all know my least favorite Arc V episode… wow… shocker, right?)]

1. Episode 37: Point of No Return

Welp. This is it. My favorite. Favorite. Arc V episode and moment.

The one episode I’ve seen like……. idefk how many times. I pretty much know the script by heart now. Yeah. In Japanese.

What is it about this episode? Maybe it’s the-

No! Stop we’re not there yet!

I think it’s the fact that this episode

is, imo, when shit TRULY. HITS. THE FAN. 

As I titled this entry, this is literally. The Point. of No. Return.

Nothing is the same anymore after this episode. The plot is completely, entirely on autopilot from this point on.

“Destiny Starts to Move.”

This fucks with me, man. How much so? Here look:

Yeah I know this was just 5 months ago, but my god. You never know what fate has in store for you. Look at this other thing that I just found again also:

haha “lol”. 

I can go on forever about the massive foreshadowing this episode is, or about how tragic it is, or both. OR. I can just… appreciate what they’ve done here.

I love Arc V because, as I said before, this show hits at like literally ALL of my favorite tropes, combines them with YGO and Arc V’s relatable AF characters, and then deconstructs those tropes immensely.

So for example, this episode alone:

A PLOT MAJOR duel NOT involving the main character/protagonist, yet still affects his life forever anyway.

“Kills” (ymmv) off a plot-important character within less than the first half of the show.

Said character STAYS that way (almost unheard of in YGO).

Said character’s dying words aka his last fucking will remains unresolved for pretty much the entire show until the very last episode. (FORESHADOWING WHAO)

You can’t. Escape. Fate. (The end result would be the same regardless of what happened this episode.) You can’t even change fate, in this situation. Not even slightly.

No. You won’t even fix your fate either. Hell, this is a trope that Yugioh usually actively avoids.

Yes, I know this episode is cruel in so many ways, and even more so in hindsight, but as I said before, I love angst. And I love deconstruction of tropes. And I love foreshadowing.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t just love this episode in hindsight. There are so many things going on

“Destiny Starts to Move” - yeah, after all of Ray’s bracelet’s struggles of keeping them away from each other, Zarc finally made his first definitive move sending Yugo here and now three of his four pieces are gathered in one spot, two of them misguidedly pissed at each other for extra hitotsu ni- dueling motivation, with not a single bracelet in sight. There’s no turning back now. Just another win-win Sunday night for Zarc.

And, oh yeah, this was Yugo’s debut. Just to emphasize the fact that their coexistence is unnatural.

Lmao no matter how you see it, their story is so damn sad fite me

Out of hindsight, though, I’ll admit that, besides Yuya, I still wasn’t entirely attached to the characters (or at least not to the extent I am today, even regarding Yuya), but this episode was, as I titled this, the point of no return for me as well. If I ever thought about quitting the show and just coming back to binge it later (which… never actually crossed my mind, I don’t think lol), this was the episode where I thought “shit… I’m definitely here forever now.” I mention the whole quitting and then binging thing cuz that’s what I pretty much eventually did with all YGOs before it, even DM, but not with this show.

Of course this episode is also where we get a hint of what’s been going on with the introduction of Yuri and Leo Akaba asking him to bring Yuzu to him, but doesn’t give enough away that it’s obvious at all. Pretty much all the mysteries gathered in this episode here quite nicely but the shock ending- Yuto dying- gave us all something even greater to ponder about… we knew when it happened that this was only the beginning…

“When the paper’s crumpled up, it can’t be perfect again…”

Honestly, I can continue talking about a bunch of other things regarding this episode for forever, but… talk about… otanoshimi wa kore kara da… so many things that came after this in the story were built upon this moment, it’s definitely one of the most important moments in this show. 

And it’s my favorite moment in Arc V.

[ts-seychelles]

EP. 1 - “The Ghosts of Tumblr Survivor Past, Present, and Future“ - AUGUSTO

So getting to know my tribe, I see a couple of familiar faces like Jared and JG from other places. Regan also hosted Flops which is a good thing since I got along with her. However if I'm being honest I feel like I connect with Dan the most, hopefully we can talk a bit more because I want to work with him in the future. 

from deep within the void* hi sisters It’s me, Dan. So I really am like doing nothing in this game rn. I’m the only person who said they could do the flag and I know my gay ass isn’t good enough for that. So I’m just going to submit some bullshit I make in five minutes and call it a day. Fucking Alex Crooks is on the other side and I can hear his cocky little ass right now being like. “WeLl I’m MoSt QuAlIfIEd BeCaUsE i MaDe GrApHiCs FoR pReViOuS tS sEaSoNs” I literally don’t even know him that well but I hate him so I hope he’s an early boot so I don’t even have to entertain the idea of speaking to him on a game or personal level. Call me a bitch, call me jealous, but seeing him stroke his own ego for no reason in VLs has completely turned me off to ever wanting to talk to him ever. Don’t even get me started on that extra ass intro video sis. Get a hobby. As far as my tribe goes, I will do anything for Sam Bosse, so. Jared knows Amanda and is dating Nicole and may be the weirdest person I’ve ever had to talk to. Agus is cool and I wanna work with him I think. And honestly I don’t remember anyone else’s name rn.....oh Allison! She’ll probably be inactive for the first week, we’ll lose the challenge and hopefully vote her out. It’s just #EasierThatWay And that’s all you really missed on Glee. *fades into the abyss*

REGAN SCARES TF OUTTA ME. DRAKE IS A COOL DUDE. I LOVE SAM. AUGUSTO DESERVES THE WORLD. AND FRANKIE IS PRETTY CHILL. ALSO, I MESSED UP REALLY BAD AND CALLED ALLISON AMANDA. 

It’s time to open shop cause we’re back for business, baby! And this time we REALLY mean business. Okay, yeah… that’s cringy but I’m just really thankful that I’m back for the fifth time to redeem myself. Redemption means to finish what I’ve set out to do the four times I’ve played before; to win. I’ve messed it up for myself countless times before and it’s up to me to do better, be better. Now it’s just a matter of how it’ll happen. :D 

Just put back 99 bottles down with Johnny and Vilma. We knocked it out perfectly in about as little time as possible, so I think we've got at least 1 of our 3 that we need to win immunity. We spent an hour and a half talking to each other so we really got to build something too. I'm glad that we did that and hope we can all move forward together. 

With this being my fifth game, this isn’t my first rodeo per se but I need to act like it is for my sake. I always come into games with 150% effort right off the bat and it gets me out incredibly early, so I guess you could say my strategy is to be more chill? I want to really put effort into my relationships with people on this first day so there’s a semi-solid foundation for at least this round. More often than not, the people that are active and likable during the first day end up staying at least for the very first round. After I make good conversation with a majority of our tribe the first day, I’ll be a little less active in talking to people and see who keeps up the effort to talk to me, etc. Let’s see how long I keep this up though… 

*a few moments later*

This cast = stacked, period. I’m genuinely happy for everyone returning to right their wrongs (yes, even Johnny). The Lazare Tribe has the better tribe color, no cap… but I’m glad I’m on Malabar. I’ve played with Johnny and Roxy in Flops and Great Lakes respectively, plus I lost to Alex in my first ORG ever. While being on a tribe with Roxy would be a good time guaranteed, it wouldn’t be good for either of us in terms of longevity cause I feel we’d be clumped together and targeted for it. So for the moment, I’ll have to be without the icon herself and hope to be on a tribe with her in the future. As far as Johnny goes, he was a large reason why I left Flops in the first place plus we were super close allies that never trusted each other, so if we do meet again it would either be a clash of the titans or the best collab since Mariah and Whitney. (K, I cringed @that but it works). Plus, he was the one who randomized the rock draw that got me out in Socotra so the universe is basically saying he is not one to be trusted! If we would’ve started on a tribe together, things would’ve gotten awkward quick so I’m glad I’m spared from that and can spread my own wings until I meet him again. SO yeah, thank you hosts for putting me on Malabar, xoxo.

*a few moments later*

Guess the hosts are feeling the Christmas spirit by bringing the Ghosts of Tumblr Survivor Past, Present, and Future to us. You guessed it, our season’s twist is Ghost Island, which centers around all the mistakes, misplays, and misfortunes of all who have played TS before. I mean they played TS to begin with so that’s probably the first mistake, but in all seriousness… I probably have like 58493 items hidden at Ghost Island. We got the misplayed extra vote from Flops, the idol I went home with in Flops, the exile pass I didn’t use in Great Lakes, the rock I drew in Socotra, we could probably even include the whole Aomak tribe and Great Lakes as a whole. All in all, we got options! As you can see, I don’t have the best experience with advantages but as part of my unfinished business, I want to go to Ghost Island to at least have the opportunity to redeem myself. This’ll be interesting for sure, especially since someone will be exiled from Tribal Council every round which is an advantage and disadvantage within itself. Realistically though, I can see them sending in Regan every round cause people are like that lmaooooo 

* another few moments later*

Okay, I think I’m doing okay for like the first time ever? I don’t know, my tribe is just really cool and I’ve vibed with almost everyone to some extent. If I had to pick my favorite person on the tribe, I would say Samantha just because we legit have so much in common and had some surprisingly deep conversation like about how diversity is super important in our society. So yeah, she’s awesome. If I had to pick a second, it would be either Ashen or Jared just because we’ve had tons of laughs in our conversations, which is nice. For example, Ashen talked about being from Tennessee and hating country music which turned into us having a fake band and then with Jared, we were making jokes about how we are making profit off of our fake OnlyFans account. Regan and I are somewhat close, just because she hosted me and like I try to be really nice to her since some people act kinda messed up towards her. Drake and I were both in Flops, but we never interacted since we were never on a tribe together and same goes with Dan in Great Lakes, so hopefully I get the chance to play with them. While I started interacting with Frankie kinda late, we’ve had some cute little chats which is nice. JG was a little hard to talk to in PMs, but we were interacting a lot during the tribe call so who knows! The only person that I, and I think everyone else, haven’t really talked to is Allison just because she hasn’t been here all that much. I do know her somewhat from playing Izu Islands with her though, so if she and I talk it’d be fun to catch up and get to know each other more. This is all great, but it’d make a future tribal kinda difficult. I do think that Allison would be a scapegoat for everyone, which is a tiny bit reassuring but again, you never know. 

The Art of the Meme: My social game is good enough to get me through to a potential tribe swap. I HOPE. And it is all encompassed in my ability to make others laugh. How, you say? Memes. I try my best to analyze the personalities of the tribe and place whichs memes fit best with each person during lulls in the conversation. That way, it never seems like the convo is drying up! Relationship Rankings: 1. JG 2. Dan 3. Drake 4. Samantha 5. Augusto 6. Reegan 7. Ashen 8. Frankie 9. Allison

Normally I do video confessionals, but we'll do this just to have something in real quick while it's fresh! Just jumped off call with Alex. Hands down this is the guy I wanna work with coming into this game. Only guy I know who's a loyal type of player unless given reason not to be. That's who I want on my side. He's also a threat in these games and having a nice little punching bag in front of me throughout this game will be nice lol. So without even second guessing, he's the guy I'm riding this game out with. Obviously though I need to make some other connections and right now priorities lie with Johnny, Roxy, and Zach. Johnny I connect with the most outside of Alex. He seems pretty tight and honestly they like each other so maybe forming a 3 with them in the future would make my day!!! Roxy on the other hand is a little intense and is obviously a social threat. However having people like her on my side to make connections that I can't is vital to my game so I really want to work on her/him too idk lol. Finally, we have Zach. This guy I didn't even talk to up until recently, however Alex seems to think he's in a really good spot with the entire tribe already with 24 hours of the game starting lol. Alex seems to think it's impossible to get this guy out early and you know what they say? If you can't beat them, join them! So my "mission" right now is to get super tight with this guy because if not, I could easily be the first boot on this tribe for not connecting with the "King Pin"

Ok, so we lost the first challenge and Alison is basically guaranteed first boot due to her inactivity. But I kind of hope they send her to ghost island so we get the real drama and have to make rifts in the game and go for blood instead of an easy target. As long as it’s not me I don’t really care.

okay winning the first immunity while I tried to plan the strategy of all three components of the challenge? LIVING FOR IT Not sending Regan to the first ghost island because she's a troll and I kind of hate everything she does as a person? Also here for it. Very happy Jared went to Ghost Island because I'm trying to get him to trust me this time around, and hopefully my friendship with Nicole can blossum into something great. I know not many people are going to actively try to work with both of them, so if I can manage to work with both of them for as long as they're in the game, I feel it'll benefit me? idk. it's tricky At least I'm safe! No 20th for me whewwwwwww 

*a few moments later*

I DONT KNOW HOW I DO IT BUT I LITERALLY FOUND AN IDOL ON MY FIRST TRY Not telling anyone. If people ask me about my searches im going to get so triggered because i don't know how to lie about not finding anything yet, but god speed. I can't wait for my three episode unfinished business stint to be OTTNN for 3 episodes and then be voted out because I went to someone's house and actually set them on fire? Queen Ashlyn WHO? 

So my tribe lost first immuntiy such a bummer, I mean i hope im not first boot but honestly i dont know. People say Allison since shes been inactive so im fine with that but im going to hold my vote until i know for sure since everything can change in 24 hours i had it happen to me. 

so roxy and alex are sending fucking audio messages of themselves singing in the tribe chat and it’s kinda annoying like damn i didn’t know this was the voice //: 

The idol hunt is on. I already know 7 places that it isn't thanks to everyone else. I'm going to keep trying to figure it out using communications with other people. I'm going to give it a shot on my own now. 

Hello this is Roxy and it's my first confessional. We just finished our first immunity and we want really happy because I like my tribe and I do not know who I would have voted out if we went to tribal I think I'm in a very good standing but my social game is plummeting with everyday I need to really get my head in the game and to get to know people I haven't been able to do that and that's not good like I talked a bit and it's all Hollow on Surface but if I really want everybody to be in my pants when I need to crank up by social game two little bit hard with the fact that I'm only Australian and I'm not the best at social because I don't know what to say or how to start a conversation other than when it comes to strategy and talking to my strategy is not good and Elsa leads to paranoia which leads to getting voted out or idoled out. I'll see if there are some words that don't make sense in those days because I'm doing a speech to text thing because I'm too lazy to type but I really want this n text nobody's gonna watch the video. So I will do a cost assessment now for ACL to my tribe so we have alex crooks I love it looks crooks he's really nice and sweet and have a connection through steam but the problem is I haven't been able to socialize with him alot or connect with him so that will be my top priority because I really want to work with him and I think you'll feel loyal to me Next we have asya.  She's nice and I know her from house of shade I haven't been able to talk to her much apart from the first day I got a 6 that I don't think I see myself working with her long term but I know that is supported to have strong social connection with her because I think she's a loyal type it should stick to her Ally and she could also easily turn people against me I think she has that kind of social power Next is Johnny I like him and I really want to work with him I f***** him up into other or something lol it cencored me. Anyways I want to work closely with him and I think it will be better official to me beneficial not official to be bothered to backspace and Away the only problem with him is that I don't have that much impact usually I feel like I'm seen more as under the radar the matter what I do so then I brought up the bigger players and Johnny is somebody who easily get so much credit just because he is a present and I don't have my skills but still want to talk with her VI: There's my girl and I think if I have a final 2 she would be it I think she's loyal once you're stuck with me and yeah she's cute nice nicole: I haven't had a lot of chance to talk with Nicole she's been sort of not that here because it she's sick but I think she is potential big Ally but I don't feel a lot of potential or f*** I just said potential twice I mean like this potential but I don't know for sure and we'll see how time Curtis but we'll see I don't know Ruben: There is another contender for final to it'll be Reuben I think that he won't ever but he'll be super loyal and I'm going to put a lot of effort into my relationship with them because I believe that is the why is this for me strategically and he also seems really nice he always apologize for everything must be from New Zealand lol jokes VIlma: Barely seems to be on but I think when I go overseas I want to go to Israel time zone is my line better but I'm not sure Zach seems to like her and he wants to bring her into reliance in says oh because she's not that on that much she'll be loyal to us and I think that workout zach: So I can I have a tricky past but I think he will remain loyal to me which is why ive decided to allign with him. He has already made a 1 on 1 chat with me and a f3 chat with vi and i and wants an allaince with alex myself johnny vi and vilma. lets see how that goes. ALso we fuckin squashed them. Heh. 

"It's been almost 5 hours on Exile... I haven't eaten in days. The rumblings of my stomach are a chorus to the ears of a wild, lonely man. Only strategy crosses my mind now. How do I win this game? How do I maximize the advantage of having Nicole here and minimize the potential detriment? I have good bonds already with the occupants of Lazare. Johnny, though once a foe, could prove to be an asset to me in this game. I won't count my chickens before they hatch." *BONG BONG BONG go the drums of the natives* "Cannibals, certainly. And so I hide, erasing my plans, finger-drawn in the dirt." ~4 hours pass~ "The hosts have come and gone. 'Eureka!' they say, their camera phones foreign to me now. I have decided to give the Legacy Advantage to Nicole. Still, I question this decision. It is unlikely that this tool will have much utility now. There are benefits to being away from Malabar. Obvious in it's nature- Ghost Island will protect me from eviction. Though alliances will be formed without me, I should be able to make it to the tribe swap with the relationships I've nurtured, needing only a majority of 5 when I return. I will sleep for now, dreams bound to be boasting new plans. Sweet byebye forever Cao Boi." 

The challenge flop from Flops jumped out and so did the losing Great Laker from Socotra… and the Sarpang member from Bhutan…. All in all, a sis sucks at challenge as shown by me bringing a DODGEBALL to a PAINTBALL fight. Starting off on the losing tribe is something I’m sadly used to, but I hope it doesn’t become a Aomak Part 2 as that was enough for me to take tbh. With Malabar losing however, it gives us a chance to form strategic connections which sucks for Jared who was sent to Ghost Island. Him being sent was a little weird to me since I expected someone like Samantha or even Allison to be sent, but I’m glad he’s going since we were pretty tight those from 3 days. Speaking of Allison, where is she? She legit hasn’t shown up and I hope it isn’t anything serious outside of the game and if it is, I’m sorry Allison (when she sees this). That being said, she’s the likely first boot since she’s the most inactive. Although, I am a bit concerned for Samantha since she’s been a little quiet recently and she told me not many talk to her. Plus, Dan let me know her name was out there a little bit and gave me a backstory on Sam and Regan’s supposed beef. Dan and I have really gotten closer in these past few days and he actually approached me about working together, so I’m glad I actually have a semi-solid ally this early! Tribal council seems easy for this first round and I hope it stays that way for at least a little bit :D 

so tbh im super nervous no one is speaking to me and like I honestly think it can't possibly be as simple as Allison. But then again are they dumb enough to vote me, who could be an asset over an inactive like Allison? Also I trust Dan, Augusto, and Drake

[survivorkomnata]

Episode #13: “I'm about to make a million dollar mistake..” - Tim

So....pretty sure my game just suffered a MAJOR setback. Alyssa was my ride or die to the end, and Karth just proved himself to be an unreliable ally. He felt threatened by Alyssa, and maybe rightfully so, since she would definitely have probably beaten him. So at this point, it looks like the sides are lining up to be Me/Zach vs /Tim/Karth/Stephen at this point. I don't think I can convince either Tim or Karth to go against the other, but Stephen might be a possibility. I promised him my loyalty if he'd be my ally, and I argued that tim and karth definitely could NOT and have shown that they will break those promises, so Stephen is pretty much my hope at this point. That being said, I am one clue for spelling the word 'ESCAPE' in the idol hunt, although I don't know what to do with the word once I get it. If I can pull out an immunity this time and get the idol, it's a possibility I could still make it to the end. Here's hoping.

So I survived the last tribal!!!! I can't believe it!! I'm very very satisfied with the way last round unraveled. I pushed for Alyssa to go because she was the main person after me and I was happy with targeting her this round. I pushed for her name because I figured Zach wouldn't want to go to rocks over Alyssa and if he didn't then she'd go home. I didn't want to vote Jake out because I'm trying to bring him to the end of the game with me and karthik. It all worked out in my favor when Stephen won immunity and Zach,Alyssa, and Jake voted for me. Karthik wouldn't flip on me and Stephen had nothing to lose in the event of a rock draw.

So this round's challenge is mastermind! I absolutely love this challenge it is my favorite!!!! Ok so the worst case scenario that can happen tonight is Zach winning immunity and Jake playing an idol on himself!!! That would leave me completely vulnerable. The only way I would survive in that scenario is if Zach and Jake vote Stephen and not me, which I doubt. But the numbers are dwindling quickly. Does jake really think he stands a chance against Zach or Stephen at the end???? He can't be that delusional right??

i promised alyssa i would have me or jake in ftc.

i lied.

the idol is gone.

i'm flopping at this challenge.

it's over.

i'm going :airplane emoji: fifth place.

i think there's a decent chance the vote is 3-2 and i'm in the 3, but get idolled out.

So basically at this point, my path to the end involves Karth not being an idiot, but for whatever reason, he doesn’t want to recognize Stephen as the legit jury threat he is. Ughhhh

Zach claims Stephen is the biggest challenge threat between the two since he has won 2 immunities. I disagree. Have yall SEEN Zach premerge??? He literally carried every tribe he was on. He def has challenge capabilities that I or Stephen don't possess. If I vote out Stephen then it leaves two duos at final 4. Its a 2v2 and if Zach wins that immunity then the game is over for me. If Jake wins it will go to firemaking and I will get my ass handed to me by Zach. On the FLIP SIDE If I vote out Zach then the game becomes a 3v1 with Stephen being a solo player. If he wins that immunity then I can kiss my chances of winning goodbye. If he loses then his game is up and I get to go to f3 and possibly win?? So that is why I'm leaning towards voting for Zach over Stephen.

I'm about to make a million dollar mistake.

I am a mess..idk what to do. I am unsure if I should be glad or sad for being the only person not getting votes so far. I have been doing the best I can but it still seems that I would be seen as the goat at the end. Its so unclear for me on how the jury perceives any of the remaining people and who their favorite. All I know is its definitely not me. At least winning this immunity could have given me some confidence but I wasnt lucky in that either.

I've been pretty calm all day today knowing that I'm going to survive the Tribal Council thanks to my idol. Maybe to a strange degree, but honestly, it's all okay. Jake winning immunity is unfortunate only because it limits my options of who to vote out, but I was leaning towards voting Zach anyway, so this isn't the worst case scenario at all.

Since Alyssa has been voted out, Tim and Jake have both told me that I'd win if I make Final Tribal Council. Tim even got a little vindictive with me when I tried to argue I wasn't the biggest threat to win. I appreciate the compliment, but not all of the implications that come with it. Needless to say, if I didn't have an idol, I'd be packing my bags tonight. But luckily, thanks to Tim, Karth, Alyssa, Jess, and Ally, and all the information they gave me, I won't have to worry about that. My eyes are on F4.

Winning the next immunity challenge would be amazing. It might get me into Final Tribal, but it may also just get me into F3 immunity. I have no clue what it could be. I hope I don't NEED to rely on immunity to stay, but, I mean, give me a break here. With so many people saying I'm THE threat to win, how could I not feel that way?

🚨🚨🚨ANNOUNCEMENT🚨🚨🚨 🚨THIS IS POSSIBLY MY LAST CONFESSIONAL FOR CELESTIAL: KOMNATA🚨

i believe this vote will be 3 votes stephen, 2 votes me. i also believe, in some way, stephen is going to get idolled.

my initial plan was to get [tim + karthik] = stephen [zach + jake] = tim [stephen] = zach

so when one of them idolled, i was safe. however, tim not being on board derails that plan entirely. this game is so frustrating. his logic to a degree makes sense. i support it. but like, stephen will sweep this FTC and i honestly probs wouldn't so. also, through our conversation, i realize how smart tim is. good for him!! king of analyzing.

anyway.

firstly, thank yawls for hosting. i'm sorry 2 alyssa. it's just sucky cuz the "three biggest players" at merge (this is on paper, not legit) were ally/alyssa/myself, and all three of us are probably leaving back 2 back LOL

i also want to apologize to jake. this is for post-season ig NNNNNN jake - i want 2 apologize for being distrusting of you in the past. you are a great person + i am so appreciative to have worked with you & met you in this game.

i am leaving this game content (if i do, that is). i played hard. despite a huge target on my back, i managed to get fifth (when i almost got 10th/7th). i had a pretty elevated social game, physical game too, and i think strategically i was fine. my main blunder was the idol misplay but zzz i wouldve used it at f6/7 anyway probs, just bc ppl knew i had it. i dont want to stroke my ego or anything but im fully accepting of how i played. i only wish i had more agency, but i dont really fault myself for that i guess (but when i get to jury/post season ill def see that it's probs more something i did but... for now, i'm angel :$)

me rn: Alexa, play The Climb

going✈️fifth and going✈️jury tonight! cheers

🚨🚨🚨gays dont win lol🚨🚨🚨

Sooooo...this vote basically hinges entirely on Karthik. If we three vote Stephen (is and Zach), then Stephen is out UNLESS he plays the idol which is a distinct possibility. Either way, the possibility that Stephen gets three votes and doesn’t have an idol is the only way Zach can get thru this vote, and I really hope he does.

Zach is voted out in a 3-2 vote. He becomes the seventh member of our jury.

[0225pm]

USS + some thoughts

missing loads of posts so i’m just gonna start with the most recent events and cover the rest in a while!!!

/////////////////////

guess where we went yesterday?  USS!

my mom’s company held a family day thing so the tickets for USS were about 1/3 of its original price if i’m not wrong! initially i wanted to surprise han by going over to his place and buying some lunch for him (bc the day before he told me that his mom’s not at home which just means that there’s not gonna be food at home) but i prepared late and he found out the surprise (the bit where i’m gonna go over to his place to fetch him) so it was a failure!!!!!!!! :( but he said he still love getting these sort of surprises from me even though it wasn’t an unexpected surprise anymore hahahaha but i’m still glad that he’s happy!

so i took a hitch to his place (and skipped the whole takeout for him bc i was already late) and waited for him by the stairs to come down (i thought he would be taking the stairs since he lives on the second floor but his lazy ass took the lift instead wth) and i didn’t even notice him standing opp flashing out his phone to take a video of me (which he posted on his dead ig)

and then from there we went to grab a little bite before heading to the mrt. for some reason, things felt really tense between us like idk if it’s just me feeling that way but it just felt really cold??? then he whipped out his phone again to play ml while i just took out my phone to listen to some music. from yew tee, we would have to stop at jurong and then buona vista before changing lines to the yellow line to get to harborfront. so while on the journey to jurong, we were just doing our own shit. i took out a book (i borrowed from the library about a week and a half ago - it’s called tokyo zodiac murders i think) to read while he continued playing ml. when we reached jurong, we were waiting for the train to buona vista and without double checking, we just boarded this one train only to find out that we were heading back to where we came from when han heard the train operator thingy mention cck. LOL we’re like dumb and dumber sia at that point of time hahahaha and i thought that we would be late for the event but my brother called and told me that apparently we can only go in at 530PM. so we still had plenty of time to kill which was great. 

upon arriving at buona vista, i received another call my bro saying that we can only go in at 630PM and by the time we reached the place, it was just slightly after 630 so that was good until we saw the crowd LOLLLL

the amount of people queuing was fucking mental!!! i wished i had taken a video of how much human beans there were but i didn’t thought about it. i honestly couldn’t really stay in focus because it was so hot and i was just perspiring so much and felt sticky everywhere. i should have brought an extra set of top or something but i didn’t, unfortunately. (tryna kick the habit of bringing extra clothes everywhere i go)

we walked a whole round to find the end of the line, only to be brought back right to where we were standing in the beginning, and then we saw that there was another line that seems much shorter than the rest so we decided to move towards that line instead of waiting like a fool following the longer trail of human beans. fortunately, we managed to get into the place in like less than 20 mins. but that wasn’t the end.........

we still had to follow the crowd to i think it’s called SeaWorld or WaterWorld or something, where the winners of the lucky draw was gonna be announced at before a performance and i’m glad we decided to stay for the performance bc it was fucking lit!!!!! i really love it, it was so interesting and really put together. you can see the amount of effort the performers put in to make everything seem so real. i’m not sure if the story is from some old fairytale or something but i think it’s something i would have to research on (if i’m not lazy that is hahaha)

it was already dark by the time the performance ended and as we head out to explore the rest of the place, out of the corner of my eyes i saw my bro and his gf buying something to snack on. so from there, we went on our separate ways. my bro and his gf, han and myself. we were walking around looking for somewhere to eat and we stumbled upon the roasted turkey leg food cart again we so decided to get one of each (should have shared one instead bc it was so salty after awhile), something to munch on while walking around. it was han’s third time at USS whereas its only my second time. i wouldn’t even say it’s second because the first time i went with the fam we didn’t explore the place much and only when there to have lunch/dinner + both me and my bro only rode on the human and cylone ride before my parents decided it was time to head home. so most of the places felt really new to me and i was enjoying myself though i wasn’t sure if han was enjoying himself but i think he was kinda tired from all the walking. he’s not usually the type to like walking for long hours on end but bc i really wanted to walk around, he went along with it. 

the turkey legs were too salty to finish up and my bottle of green tea wasn’t helping mask the saltiness so han asked if we should just throw the rest away and then he’ll get a corndog for us to share after noticing a corndog cart about a stone throw away from where we were standing at.  

i nodded in agreement and told him i wanna head to the toilet first to wash my hands after which, we went to queue.

the corndog was so good!!! i really love the taste of the batter for the breaded part but han said it was nothing special lmao. 

after that we walked around again and then i took a look at the waiting time for the different rides and almost wanted to give up riding anything because one, i was perspiring buckets and two, the waiting time was so long. but han asked me again if i’m sure about leaving and then we noticed that there was a performance showing at 930PM so we decided to stay for that and while waiting we sat nearby mel’s drive-in bc there was another performance there. i also decided to call my bro to ask him if he wanna ride the galatica rollercoasters with me bc i asked han but i felt like i was just forcing him to ride something he dont want to cus he snapped at me when i told him that i dont want to ride it alone and he has to ride it with me hahahaha but my bro’s gf didn’t want to ride the galatica too so han sees it as an opportunity to not ride and used taking my care of my bag as an excuse LOL so i was alrighty then and rode the red one with my bro. 

it was so thrilling!!!! i love it even though i felt so queasy afterwards but it felt like all my stress and whatever shitty feeling i was feeling before sorta disappear during the ride. i wanted to ride the blue one (the one where there’s more twists and turns and ur feet will dangle in the air) and han wanted to challenge himself to ride it too but bc both me and my bro was still tryna catch our breaths, his gf suggested riding other rides first - and so we went to the mummy one.

but holy shit i think it was by far the more thrilling one as compared to the red galatica rollercoaster wtf there are so many twists and turns and the atmosphere was so just frikin cold like you’re really underground the mummy’s tomb and shit i absolutely love it!!! i think the suspense was what really made the whole ride interestingly enjoyable and thrilling. before the ride i actually linked arms with han sia hahahaha and i’m glad i did bc at one point of time it was legit scary.

and then after the mummy, we walked towards the puss in boots ride and before that everyone thought that it’s just a lame ass ride for kids and it’s not gonna be scary and i thought like ok at least its gonna be a chill ride BUT OH BOY WAS I SO FUCKING WRONG HAHAHAHHAHAHA the suspenses are fucking killers and ITS DEFINITELY NOT A LAME RIDE. but as compared to the mummy one, this one’s less thrilling. 

oh and han was so touchy when we were waiting for the rides HAHAAHAHAH i think he proper was having fun and was really enjoying himself or maybe bc he got to smoke so his mood became happier AHHAHAHA but i really love that side of him more. i  was legit perspiring like crazy like my whole tee was drenched in sweat but that didn’t stop him from pulling me closer to him as he embraced me and then grabbed onto my hand holding it tightly. sighHHHH he makes me feel so tingly. i look like shit but he don’t even care hahahhaha

we had a little bit of time for one more ride so for the last one, we decided to ride the transformers one and wah i think out of all this one is my favorite!!! i can understand why its one of his fav too!!! you really feel like you’re in the animation/short movie they were showing. the whole experience was just amazing. to quote him “it feels very 5D” hahahahaha 

we didn’t have time to ride the cylone so we gave that up and then from there we went on our separate ways and head back. 

han asked whether we will be separating there and going home on our own and without hesitation i said no. and there silence filled the air and during that time i was doing some reflection mentally. like how tired he was, how far away from home and how he will have to travel back and forth. i was just being really selfish so i told him its was okay and we can separate from there but he said no bc the first answer i gave him is what i really wanted (like the truth ah) and he said about how even if i said its ok or if its fine, its actually not ok which tbh is true la but i just...... didn’t want to be selfish and self centered only thinking about my own wellbeing when i know he was as tired as i was, if not more. 

(while walking towards vivo, idk how the topic of break up came about but he asked me like what i’d do if he ask for it and honestly without hesitation i told him i would kill myself which i think scared him but idk man my heart will prolly be so broken i think even if i don’t kill myself i will die from the heartbreak. and then i asked him what he’ll do if the role is reverse and he said that he will prolly be like how it was like with the rest of his past rs, ask why and then cry about it and then he’ll be okay. i was.... idk i just didn’t know what to say. what he said hurt me and made me feel like i was “the same like all his other past rs” idk why but i thought maybe i was different, maybe i was The One for him, the one that he will never be able to forget about but ofc i didn’t tell him about how i feel bc i didn’t want to make things anymore awkward so i just kept quiet and pretended things were ok but you know me, i think about things and i just felt like he’s prolly gonna get tired of my shit sooner or later.)

anyway, he still stubbornly refused and wanted to send me back so we decided to take uber back (it was hard to get a hitch at that time and place) and then went to the 24 hours indian shop to have supper before he sent me back. we chilled for a bit at the void deck as per usual and then around 3+ 4, my bro and his gf appeared hhaha so we ended up chilling together and playing a couple rounds of ml before they left (my bro sent his gf home) and then around 5, 5+, han booked a grab to head home. 

before that though i asked him something about having to send me home i think, but i can’t quite remember what his response what. i think it was something along the lines of, we live so far from each other sometimes it’s hard or something like that idk. 

but i know it made me feel kinda sad though i was thankful that he took time to send me back even though he was so tired and he lives on the other end. 

we also talked about wishes and one of his wish is to get a bike but he told me that its something difficult with me around and even though i know it was really just a poor choice of words, it makes me think if i’m a burden and if i’m too much for him to handle. 

i really wonder what he thinks of us and if he’s holding back all his feelings because he’s afraid if he put in too much of himself into me, it might all be in vain in the end. i just hope i don’t fuck things up because i really want us to last for a really long time and i know, we don’t know what the future holds for us but honestly, i want to be with him till death do us part, at the very least.

[lilith-wynn-sage]

The Power of Worry Reversal

The Power of Worry Reversal - Author Unknown

These are skills to help you reverse obsessive worries into positive, empowering, beneficial goals for yourself

Anticipation: Anticipating what you’d like to see happen instead of your obsessive, negative thoughts.  Anticipating good outcomes and getting excited about them.  Choosing empowering thoughts to motivate you.  It means anticipating your goal becoming a reality for you.

I have spent so much of my life squashing down the positive anticipation.  I used to be filled with hopes and dreams, until one by one they were crushed.  Over and over again I would suffer what I thought to be some strange karma for past life transgressions.  I could never understand why such awful things kept happening to me, so I slowly convinced myself that I didn’t deserve good things. I didn’t deserve to be happy. Instead, I decided that everything life threw at me was deserved because I was a worthless being and should be in the trash with the rest of the refuse.  It’s taken years, therapy practice, and medication to even come close to those happy days I had as a child, but so far it’s been worth it! One of my guilty pleasures is reading/listening to Joel Osteen, who in one of his recent books wrote about putting good thoughts out into the universe.  I’m back to thinking about karma, but instead of focusing on contrived past misfortunes, I’m focusing on future desires.  I say to myself, “I will graduate, I will be happy, I will be loved” and I do whatever is in my power to support these anticipations.

Planning: When you worry about something bad happening, you worry what will happen, how it will feel, and what you need to do to prevent it.  You need a plan of action to make anything happen. How can you plan your actions to make your goal a reality?

I worry SO MUCH.  My family jokes that it’s in our genes.  I worry about legit things--friends driving home safe--and I worry about silly things--the hot tub exploding for no reason, thus causing the gas grill to catch fire and burn our home to the ground and we’re all stuck inside of it and--.  I think of it as this “double talk” in my head, this back and forth of ideas, an argument between what others could think of as the angel and devil on your shoulder, but is in fact more complicated.  When it comes to planning I have a habit of planning for the worst, because the worst is what has happened to me in most/many occasions.  I used to feel that by just being happy I was inviting the worst.  Instead, I can plan to reach the goals that I want to happen.  I can still make contingency plans, but the overall sight has to be on making positive things reachable.  In order to do this I break tasks up into smaller, more manageable pieces.  Instead of thinking “Oh gods, I need to get up, get dressed, do all of my morning things, go to work, I can’t get all of this done RIGHT NOW, ahhhh!”, I think “All right, I’m up, first thing’s first, let’s pick out some clothing for the day...aaaand...success!”, “All right, let’s go brush our teeth and comb our hair...aaaaand...success!”.  With each success I feel better equipped to continue on to my next ‘challenge’ for the day.

Analyzing: When you worry, you examine the possibilities and details of the anticipated concern, weighing the pros and cons of worrying and making your goal a reality.

I over-analyze ALL THE THINGS. Haha, but seriously--my mind races so much, some days it’s all I can do to just get from point A to point B.  I believe it’s OK to analyze pros and cons, but in a healthier way than fixation.  I’ve taken to making mental lists and crossing out unhelpful bits that don’t further the plot of my goals.

Creative Visualization: Creative visualization is a way of using your mind to get what you want out of life.  Believe it or not, everyone uses it subconsciously.  For instance, people who subconsciously tell themselves that they are unlucky, unloved, unattractive, etc, actually make those things realities for themselves.  On the other hand, people who think they are fortunate, cherished, beautiful, etc. also make these things happen.

This is what Joel was writing about!  Putting ideas out into the universe and thus inviting them to come true.  If you put bad out, then bad will find you, if you put good out, good will find you.  I’m working on positive statements, “I am beautiful, I am smart, I am strong” etc., like a mantra of power to get me through the tough times.  I don’t always remember to do so, but when I do it helps!

By thinking of the good things you want to happen as part of a regular routine, you’re creating a positive energy.  This positive energy then takes on form as the actual reality you desired.

One important note, though.  This process is only to be used to create harmony and happiness for yourself and others.  You should not try to control another’s life (creating harm) in this manner, or any for that matter.  To do so would create discord in the natural balance of the universe, and ruin the healthy things you’ve done for yourself.

How Does Creative Visualization Work?

Here are some examples of creative visualization that might have happened to you through your subconscious.

*You think to yourself “I’m going to read a book,” and then you do.

*You believe you attract the “wrong” kind of man/woman, so that’s the kind that come into your life

Exactly me. I did, and sometimes still do, believe that I don’t deserve happiness, and thus more readily accept when bad things happen to me.  It’s damaging because I allow these bad things into my life to wreak havoc.  When I’m using creative visualization I think “not today havoc, not today!” and I put my foot down (figuratively, but in extreme cases quite literally).

Using creative visualization is not simply positive thinking.  It is a learning process.  We learn who we really are, deep inside.  What our basic feelings are towards ourselves, and how we might have been holding ourselves back.

How Do I Do It?

The first step is to relax.  Sit or lie in a comfortable position, and make a conscious effort to feel each part of your body relaxing.  Start at your toes, and work your way up to your head.  As you do this, take slow, deep breaths.  This should take a few minutes.  Another term for this is meditation.

The second step is to visualize.  Many people can’t “see” a mental picture at first, so if this happens don’t let it worry you.  After you’ve relaxed, you can “practice” visualizing by picturing things you see and do in everyday life.  Try to imagine enjoyable things.  You might picture your favorite room, or dancing with someone special, or eating your favorite meal.

Decide what it is that you want.  Is there something you want to change about yourself?

Next, picture the idea or object exactly as you want it to be.  Picture yourself in the situation or using the object as if you already possessed it.  Make sure you see this very clearly.  You might also draw the scene to reinforce the idea, although, this step is not necessary.

Once you’ve got the picture in your head, think of it often.  Not only when you are relaxing or meditating, but throughout the day as well.  This is the process of sending that positive energy out into the universe.  Remember the old saying “You reap what you sow”?  Well, You’re “sowing” when you think of what you want.  The more positive energy you send out, the more you will get back.