#ok i get to watch that once ive done my fucking ESSAY

[vitamin-zeeth]

Internet archive I love you internet archive

[worthless-weight-in-gold]

GET TO KNOW ME: TOP 10 MOVIES . ( list your top 10 favorite movies and tag friends to do the same)

ok im gonna split it into my top movies of all time and then finish off the list with just my recent favs bc i dont think i have 10 all time favs

Everything Everywhere All At Once - this movie came into my gay immigrant with adhd house and beat me to death then doxxed me. i literally cried with a stranger after seeing it bc we both walked out sobbing Prince of Egypt - i mean im a jew im legally obligated-- 10 Cloverfield Lane - this COMBINED with filmjoys video essay on it??? one of the best days of my life was watching the movie then the essay right afterwards with a group of friends we all lost our minds Into & Across the Spiderverse - i love LOVE stylistic movies and i love that these movies brought stylized animation back into the mainstream. and i love the stories the movies tell 악마를 보았다 (I Saw the Devil) - 0% for the faint hearted, one of the most brutal "revenge ruins everyone" movies ive seen. also "ill take two weeks" "take... more? time off???" "nah, ill see you in two weeks." is the john wick intro of the horror world, change my mind ---- and now, 5 recent films ive loved ---- Amores Perros - my friend and i watched all of la trilogía de la muerte in 1 day & i think this is my fav one, tho i found it frustrating every now and then. but i love a "separate stories all connected with 1 event" plot also we found out later IT HAS ONE OF THE BEST TITLE TRANSLATIONS TO ENGLISH OF ALL TIME Glass Onion: Knives Out - such a fun watch, i think its one of the few newer hollywood "fuck rich people" movies(/franchises i guess since its the second installment) that the message doesnt feel like it falls really flat Tragedy Girls - very fun, really had me hardcore rooting for some murders like cmon they're girlbosses let them LIVVVVVEEEEE El Ángel Exterminador - like. cmon. classic for a reason. also more "eat the rich" i really like the pacing also it feels so purposeful ahhhh 부산행 (Train to Busan) - best zombie horror movie, hands down. this will probably get added to my fav of all time list in the future tbh

tagged by: @wynterlanding and @mutatedangels :3

tagging: @samhlaiocht @fasciinating @detectivewoof @manneatcr & anyone who hasnt done it yet!

[antpernas]

11/16/20

so today was.......... :/ im trying my best not to be too sad but like... im super fucking sad lmfao

me and the guy im staying with here in georgia slept up until around 10, at which point i got up to make us breakfast and stuff ! i made us both some scrambled eggs and cereal with avocado mayonnaise + untoasted toast (he doesnt own a toaster so it was just regular bread LOL) and it was super good! i did some studying and stuff while he was on his computer working on his essay that i wanted him to get done so we could leave to go to tennessee and see the sunset!

after he finished his essay i rewarded him with a pretty good d*ck sucking if i do say so myself and we started getting ready to leave... however. this is where i think it kinda started to go south :/

so as it turned out he had a final from 1-3 and we were going to have to wait until after he finished to leave for tennessee. this was fine by me, but it did mean we were going to be crunched for time to make it to see the sunset from a high elevation point / lookout point, since it was a 2 hour drive and sunset was around 6! but that was fine by me. after he finishes his exam, im sorta rushing him to get ready, and he starts making fun of me for wanting him to stop watching scandal and start getting ready so we can go :( once he finally starts getting ready, im a little sad cuz i saw him put on shorts and a t-shirt and then asked him to dress kinda nice/formal so we could take cute pics and stuff ! i dont think i came off mean or anything, or at least i hope i didnt, but then he said “well now im going to keep this on for sure” and i was just :( a little sad but whatever its not that deep! 

we end up leaving at 4:30 and i had dressed up cute with a sweater and khakis and shoes, the last piece to my outfit was my button up shirt that i thought was in my car, so i was just gonna put it on once we started driving. (sidebar i already knew we werent going to make it all the way to tennessee to see the sunset but i was still excited and down for the trip !) but when we get to the car my shirt isnt there, turns out i had brought it in yesterday when we moved everything inside from my car and i totally forgot sjkdfnskdjnksjn!!!! internally, i knew it was hypocritical since i had just been rushing him, but i tell him i kinda want to go back to put on the shirt (in my mind we were already not going to make it all the way to tennessee anyways so it didnt really matter but whatever!!! i GUESS) and then he just starts imitating me rushing him to make fun of me :( i end up saying fuck it and just get in the car and we leave

the drive itself was pretty uneventful, after i made a move to show him some music (it was superfruit), he shot me down and said he wouldnt be into it so he didnt even want to give it a chance. at that point i just stopped talking and started scrolling on my phone. he kept saying that i was missing the views by having my nose stuck in my phone but i was already kinda irritated/disappointed so i just let him make those comments and glanced up every once in a while to take a look

the sun ended up setting around 6:00 while we were driving and he pulled into a sports/wildlife lifestyle store ? im still not sure what inspired that but the store was cute and i needed to pee so whatever :P i learned that kayaks are way cheaper than i originally anticipated (especially inflatable ones!) so im definitely buying one when i get back to florida bc ive been meaning to see go around the inlets jeje

after that we start driving to go get some food, im still feeling kinda down but he starts being really sweet so im feeling a little better, and he has me start talking about a story id been meaning to tell him, and then we start driving back ! that conversation sorta segways into my sorta concerns with everything while ive been staying with him, but it felt really uncomfortable bc i didnt want to seem like i was getting to deep or anything within the first few days of meeting (sorta the same situation i was in with another guy that i met in cali but thats a whole other story), and long story short he ended up telling me that he didnt see us going anywhere as far as a relationship goes ;( of course i super appreciated him for being honest with me but to say i wasnt hurt at all would be a lie cuz i really like him and i drove all the way to atlanta from miami for this and i feel like it might mess up the rest of trip BUT !! its ok !!

when we get back to his place i just went straight to the couch (as opposed to the bed in his room where he was on his computer) and just took a nap ;( im gonna be sad for tonight and then tomorrow i just want to go with our original plans of having a good time around atlanta even if i know he doesnt want this to go anywhere!!

ily gn be safe muah!!

[bwunch]

Coming Home

@awolfstory rather liked this story when I gave it to them to critique, so I figured I’d post it. I’m going to try and get back into writing this kind of escapist fiction, as it does rather seem to help keep my happy while I’m writing it. This story is really dedicated to him, but he doesn’t need to know that, now does he.———————————————————————- I checked my watch, although the bell for fifth period had just rung so I knew exactly what time it was. “OK class,” I announced standing up to begin the period, “as I’m sure you all remember, you had a page of notes on act III of Macbeth due today. I’m gonna take attendance, walk around and check that, and then we’re going to watch the movie version of act III and the start of IV. General reminder, please don’t be distracting to those around you while the movie is playing, especially me, as I’ve got quite a lot of work to get finished. I still have 40 essays to grade, so thank you for that.”

I very quickly scanned the room to make sure everyone was here, and then walked around to check the notes. Everyone had done them, for once. I went over to the DVD player that was older than I am, and pressed the power button. It would need a second to work properly, so I walked over to the windows and close the blinds. As I close the blinds on the window in the very back of the room, I notice a car is parked out in the drop off lane. I take no note of it, thinking it’s probably just a delivery for a late lunch. I’ve had many of those, and many more late dinners than I care to admit, delivered to the school. But not tonight. I was determined to get everything done before the dismissal bell rang, so that I could bolt home and finish cleaning before making dinner and waiting for him to come home.

Three years. I think back on the person I was three years ago, and I’m a little shocked he didn’t leave me before signing up for another enlistment. I wasn’t a horrible person, but I was a bit of a wreck. I hadn’t started teaching yet, I was fresh out of college with a little too much debt to be comfortable with. But he stayed, even if he technically did leave. And I miss him every day with every fiber of my soul.

The phone rings, which is a bit bizarre. The phone never rings. That means something must be going on. I make an audible groaning sound as I put down my pen and pick up the receiver. “Dr. Sutton’s room. The doctor is currently out, but I can schedule an appointment to meet with them if you’d like.”

“Oliver, shut up.” replies Nessa, the chemistry teacher from down the halls and literally one of the only people who has saved me from dying of sadness while he’s been gone. “I need to run down to the front office and pick up a delivery from the front office, can you come watch my class for a moment while I do that.”

“Ness, I can just go get it for you.” I say, slightly confused.

“I’ve got to sign for it. Now get your butt over here so that the delivery guy isn’t standing down there all day.” they say. I respond that I’ll be over in a moment in the most exasperated voice I can muster.

“Class, I need to go to Dr. Drake’s room for a moment while they grab something from the office. Stay here, watch the movie, if anyone needs me, call their room. The number is on the sticky note next to the phone.” I say, grabbing my jacket since their room is always frigid.

I head down the hall, hauling 30 some essays under my arm. I enter their room, and they head out. I sit there and continue grading. I check my watch. 20 mins until the period is out. I can get these done in a little over an hour.

10 mins later, the phone rings. What the fuck did they do.

I pick up the phone. “Shhhhh…” I hear someone in the background. The movie is not playing. “Dr. Sutton, can you come down here. There’s been… a problem with the DVD player.” I hear, before people giggle in the background. I swear, these kids.

“Don’t cheat.” I say to the class as I exit the room. I head down the hall. The light in my room flashes off. God damnit.

“What happened!” I say, more out of anxiety than anger. The lights flick on.

And there he is. Sitting right in the front row. Smiling at me. I hear something in the background, but I can’t make it out exactly. It doesn’t matter. The 13 discordant horns of the Apocalypse could be sounding around me, but he’s there, so it doesn’t matter.

I may have started to cry a little bit.

“Hi…” he tries to say before I interrupt him with the most desperate hug I’ve ever managed. He hugs me back, and I definitely start crying. Not an embarrassing amount, but it’s definitely there.

“I love you so much.” I say, before squeezing and letting go. “I have waited so long for that.”

“So have I.” he says. I stare into his bright blue eyes and wonder how if anyone had ever had blue eyes before he did, because nothing compared to that blue. It pierced into my very soul, and carried me like I was floating on the ocean.

“Uhmm… do y’all need a minute?” I hear Nessa pipe up from the back corner.

I stand up straight and remember that all of that happened in front of a roomful of students (and Ness, but they’ve seen me do stupider shit). “Uhh… sorry about that y’all. I’d like to introduce you to my boyfriend. He’s been overseas with the army for three years now. But now he’s home, and I just… god I couldn’t stand to have another day with you gone.” I say, turning towards him. His dark curly hair has fallen more perfect then Donatello could’ve imagined. I hate it so much. I hate how he can just shower, and have it fall so perfectly, have it be so soft. The shit I have to do to get my hair to do that.

“I couldn’t have said it any better myself.” He says, before he begins to dig around in his pocket. “Will you do me the honour of making sure that never happens.” He gets on one knee and produces a small box. Inside it is a ring made of a soft gold. I start crying again.

“Whoa!” exclaims Ness. “Why didn’t you tell me! Is that why you needed their ring size!?”

“I mean… why else would I need it?” He says, still on the ground. There are no words coming out of my mouth. Just tears and gasps of air as I try and make sure this isn’t a dream.

I fall to my knees, wincing when I land on my bad knee. Who am I kidding, they both suck. My worse knee.

I kiss him. I really shouldn’t, being at work and all, but I don’t care at this point. I kiss him deeper. I only stop when I physically can’t breathe anymore.

“Is that a yes?” He says. He’s a fucking idiot.

“Oh my lord, yes you idiot!” I say. He stands up and offers me a hand. At least he’s polite. I take it and pull myself up.

Ness comes over and gives me a big hug. “There, now we won’t need anymore ice cream nights for a while, right?”

I may have spent a lot of money on almond milk ice cream in the last three years.

“No, no we won’t.” I say, putting on the biggest shit eating grin imaginable. I hear a bunch of people start clapping behind me before I hear the bell go off.

“Shit, is that the sixth period bell?” I say.

“Maybe…” replies Nessa.

“Go, get going to your next class. No homework, obviously. If anyone gives you trouble, let them know to call me. Have a good weekend.” I say, shooing out my fifth period kids.

I turn to my fiancé. Gonna have to get used to that. I turn to my amazing, beautiful, charming, stupid fiancé. “You made my kids late.” I say, with a stupid grin. I kiss his cheek.

[sunfish999]

if y’all ever wanted to know anything about me... i tried

hm I’m bored (i say this as i should be doing geometry homework

1. read: probably the paladin prophecy, or the finisher (just books i’ve read like 500 times, idk about understanding but--) watch: the vampire diaries? (idk i watched the entire series in 7th grade wygonnad) or aquamarine movie? listen to: XYLO, LUME, more specifically Need Nothing by Verite 

2. bro i have no idea who they are actually but I’ve seen like 2 fanfic writers who write exactly like me and seem to think exactly like me i love that. also a reg writer? uh probably mark frost? i aspire to write like f scott fitzgerald but it never gonna happen hun (cos i wanna major in physics not literature lmao)

3. holy fuck lets pick like 3 fandoms, aight? uh first lets go w my hero academia? tokoyami ofc? next... percy jackson bich-- nico LMAO no maybe bianca? hm HARRY POTTER -- ginny prolly although i dont want to date harry (oops) The maze runner? tommy actually ;; naruto? fucKINH ROCK LEE BABE uhhhsdfhh star wars is anakin and voltron is lance (or pidge actually) i should stop buuuut yeao ok

4. i think my name is fine but i aint gonna share it here (also kinda wish my nickname was charly though thats all im gonna say ALSO yes laurel is a faux name yes 

5. human being because i do nothing. lol but yes i think that who i am as a person should be based off my actions, for it is how i act that shows other people who i am, not ‘who i am inside’ dont make fucking excuses for your actions people 

6. yea i believe in 1 god and i was raised as a catholic christian but i am accepting of all religions and views

7. i mean kinda??? idk im very polish and so i eat lotta polish food (gr8 stuff right there) but im just american so yea 

8. muscial artists, well bitch i only started actively listening to lots of music (aka spotify) like last year but i listened to ari grande when i was young ofc but i dont rlly feel connected to her. maybe like, adele? probably her yea 

9. yes i am a visual artist (preferred medium is watercolor) i looooove singing although i suck so i just do it for fun, i played the french horn for 2 years (also suck so not really lol) um i also write for fun and im good at writing informative essays (my school is big in the english program lol) i was also in 3 plays but i dislike theatre so no. also i like clothes i am a fashion artist wow

10. tf? idk? i have like 3 mottos: “if you want something done right, do it yourself” “the answer to existence is not why we are here, but how we affected others during our time here” “jack at all trades, master at none, better than a master at one “ “you don’t have to speak to be present” “consider how hard it is to change yourself and realize what little chance you have in trying to change others” “do the scary thing first, and get scared afterwards” “the very fact that you're actively looking for ways to become kinder, and attempting to understand your flaws and change them for the better is fair proof that you as a person, are kind.” OK YEA MAYBE I HAVE A CREED SO WHAT 

11. ideal day lol art, reading, and binge watching tv in bed while eating. otherwise spending the day meditating in a forest in spring where its warm but not too warm and just not speaking the entire day 

12. both. i have 3 cats and 2 dogs. love all of them dearly though i’d consider myself a human puppy vs a human kitty (im not a furry calm tf down)

13. outdoors, if you mean nature. if you just mean social activity, then indoors 

14. as i said before, i like singing even though i suck, in grade school i learned the ukelele, piano, and french horn. i remember none of that now 

15. influential books my ass. LETS GO: 1. into the wild (krakauer) 2. Fahrenheit 451 (cant remember author name but its fucking iconic and a classic and it made me think) 3. just gonna go an put harry potter because that shit changed my life 4. the hobbit? idk, iconic 5. i wanna read more literature-y books soon but whatever, i feel like i should say the great gatsby but honestly with writing my essay and everything i just dont give a shit anymore

16. ok i feel like if my parents werent as strict when i was younger id have less depression and be less stressed but then i would also care less about my grades and being kind and i like that about myself sooooo 

17. lol this is EXACTLY me guys because its fucking anonymous as hell because i know none of you (except for like 2 mutuals but ive never met them irl but they’re cool) i dont trust my friends. or family, for that matter

18. my patronus is a wolf thanks for asking; and my power animal: symbolizes instinct, intelligence, and an appetite for freedom. embody personal power and balance between self-control and animal instincts. a guide to inspire you to live more freely

19. im a gryffindor, i took the pottermore test twice and got it both times, also, i took it doing the opposite and got slytherin, so i aint them (but i love slytherin sooo)

20. fuck are you serious? honestly hogwarts would be awesome as hell but probably middle earth because it still got the magic but it gorgeous as hell 

21. yea i’d probably say i love easily since i like barely talk to my crushes and yet i think i really really like them because GODDAMN 

22. school. daydreaming. eating. phone. drawing. 

23. i feel like once i move out for college i’d like em a heck of a lot more, so probably like at least once a month? when i’m older? like at least once every 2 months? i love my extended fam though

24. oh fuck my friend from school and i fucking liked chinchillas when we were little, we always text each other the same thing at the same time, i always know what shes thinking and what the basis for her actions is. shes the bff that doesnt always act like it all the time 

25. fuck yes 

26. pansexual and PROUD but still in the closet except for the whole internet and 3 friends 

27. ok honestly i feel like i dress kinda like a basic girl just more minimalistic and modest but i kinda totally want the gays to recognize me and also i fucking want those patterned polos because hell to the yes. and also i want bangs but i do sports and i feel like id look ugly because everyone says they would (waiting til college, naturally) otherwise love my freckles and real dark eyes

28. honestly, probably like a 2-3. i don’t care SO much about what people think, but i’m fucking annoyed by really dumb things super easily. i’m just really good at hiding it so no one ever knows 

29. why music wtf OK: 1. need nothing - verite, 2. lover like me - off bloom 3. strapped - FOOL 

30. why the FUCK all my quotes are in my creed bitch lemme search :

“growing up is giving up” 

thanks for listening to my TED ED talk aaaaand i hope you know me a bit better and i hope i didn’t accidentally give away too much info and someone will come kill me ok BYE 

[himlarna]

I got tagged again and im procrastinating my studying sooo

Tagged by the nerd who hasn’t left me alone for twenty years @mlkseok

Rules :  answer the questions in a new post and tag 10 blogs you would like to know better (HAHAHA YOU THINK I HAVE TEN FRIENDS)

(A)ge : 22, I didn’t even write this myself me an my tagger are the same age so

(B)irthplace : stockholm, sweden (also just copy-pasted this, we’re actually clones)

©urrent Time : 16:49, the perfect time for studying if i was actually doing that

(D)rink You Had Last : water, because im a plant. Yes, that’s right, plottvist: it is the bisexuals who are the plants, check mate

(E)asiet Person To Talk To : My dog, because I can just repeat “you’re cute” over and over to her in different ways and it totally makes sense

(F)avorite Song : No (ok but for real do people have like one song they like more than every other for longer than an hour, i dont understand).

(G)rossest Memory : Once I watched @mlkseok eat ants. This probably isnt really the grossest but we talked about it yesterday and its all ive been able to think about since uh and also this was in kindergarten OR WAS IT

(H)ogwarts House : Ravenclaw, cause im a bi-rd

( I )n Love? : No, how does that even work btw

(J)ealous Of People? : Of the ones who understands how being in love works, how

(K)illed Someone? : Jesus, what?

(L)ove At First Sight or Walk By Again? : I mean like, I’ve seen cute girls on the subway and been to shy to look at them for more than half a second, does that count?

(M)iddle Name : Danger

(N)umber Of Siblings : None as far as im concerned

(O)ne Wish : I usually just respond to these with “getting a book published”, but that hasnt happened because i havent actually like, tried yet, so

(P)erson You Last Called : my mom, she lost her phone in the laudry

(Q)uestions You’re Asked The Most : i dont remember anything anybody has ever said to me

®easons To Smile : My dog is cute, im done with the first draft of this shit fucker of an essay, now i just have to reduce it by 600 words fuck me

(S)ong You Last Sang : the moomin themesong has been playing in my head nonstop for the last hour, help

(T)ime You Woke Up : 9, which i had to set an alarm for

(U)nderwear Color : oh, oh dear goodness me (i actually dont remember)

(V)acation Destination : travelling is stressful, but watching live musicals somewhere sounds fun, when i have time and money for it which is 

(W)orst Habit : uh, im bad at cleaning? like, real bad, but that might have to do with brain things. Also I tear my nailpolish off my nails instead of getting it off the proper way and it ruins my nails but i have no self control and it’s satisfying af

(X)-rays? : i dont remember having any, i have no bones, my skeleton gone

(Y)our Favorite Food : shit, the first thing that popped up is pancakes, fck

(Z)odiac Sign : taurus, the meatiest of animals (i could also say the horniest but I WONT)

i’m tagging fuckall, my ant-eater friend took almost everybody already, why do we have so many mutual friends, except for @bourgeoisin cause she didnt know ur url :   ) and also mayb like @fluffpotato if u like, wanna tell the world about ur underwear, i honestly dont understand these questions

[soybeansoyul]

complete. | jinhwi

pairings: jinhwi, panwink, minhwan, ongniel

summary: jinyoung needs someone to fill the void in him. he’s also looking for a new housemate. and some money.

warnings: idk swearing? 

chapters: 1/2 

cross-posted from aff, ao3 and wattpad.

jinyoung groans as he looks at his tuition bills. he still has more envelopes laying on the kitchen counter. more bills, probably. "fuck you, park jihoon," jinyoung mutters as he opens another envelope.

he rolls his eyes at how his best friend had moved out of their shared apartment just to live with his boyfriend of 3 years - an extremely tall taiwanese boy named guanlin. 

boyfriend.

jinyoung whips out his phone to make a google search.

is it normal if ive never dated anyone and im like 20?

he skims through the search results and puts his phone down.

bjy @baejin

YALL its comfirmed im dying alone im gonna b single 4 lyfe !!11!

bjy @baejin

jk im not lonely or desperate i just need money

bjy @baejin

if u wanna sponsor ur boy's tuition pls hmu !

woojin @nationsdarkpast

@baejin if jaehwan-hyung could find someone u can too! WOOOO

sungwoon is shaking @kingjaehwan

@baejin @nationsdarkpast THE FUCK IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN ???

an idea pops into jinyoung's head. he heads to his bedroom and grabs his laptop.

jinyoung plugs out one of his earphones and turns to glare at the couple sitting behind him.

bjy @baejin

who in the fuck holds hands while studying?? its a damn library get out if ur gonna hanky panky and not study ffs

minhyun @optimushwang

And here we have another episode of Angsty Teen

it was sejeong and doyoung - the presidents of choir. the two seniors had heavenly voices and they were one of the sweetest couples on campus. jinyoung just didn't appreciate having to hear their "haha i love you" "no i love you more!" debate while he was trying to finish his essay.

"why so glum?" he looks up to see daniel, along with seongwoo and jisung. "i'm not, i'm just annoyed at the PDA," jinyoung replies, and continues to type away at his laptop. "by the way, hi hyungs,"

"how have you been? you seem really stressed out lately," jisung asks, concerned. "i'm fine. just broke." jinyoung's eyes don't leave his laptop.

"you're renting out your apartment, right?" seongwoo asks, sipping his coffee. "jihoon replacement?" "yup. and nah, i just need the money."

daniel looks over at seongwoo before speaking. "actually, i have a friend who's interested in moving in," daniel says. jinyoung's eyes instantly light up. "really?"

daniel nods. "do you want his number?" "yes, please!" the trio swears they haven't seen jinyoung so happy in a while. "thank you, daniel!"

baejin: hey, daehwi right?

maguhwi: yep!

baejin: u wanna come over to see the place and stuff? we can discuss afterwards if ur keen

maguhwi: sure ^^

baejin: [address attached]

maguhwi: thanks! see you tomorrow at 4?

baejin: see u :-)

jinyoung opens the door, only to be greeted by the most adorable boy he's ever seen.

you just met him, jinyoung, don't hoe around-

"hi! i'm daehwi, nice to meet you!" the blonde bows, and jinyoung does the same. "i'm jinyoung, nice to meet you too," daehwi was a little shorter than jinyoung, and he had uneven eyelids. jinyoung thought that was cute.

"so, how old are you?" jinyoung starts, waiting for daehwi to step into the apartment. "19."

"oh, i'm 20." daehwi hums in response, and the taller of the two shows him around.  

it's daehwi's first day living with jinyoung, and jinyoung wakes up to daehwi gently shaking him.

"dude, what the fu-"

"i made breakfast, jinyoungie!" daehwi smiles, and jinyoung has question marks floating around in his head.

jinyoungie?

"whoa, how do you look so handsome even when you just woke up?" jinyoung nearly chokes on his own saliva, but somehow manages to shapen up anyway. this beautiful stranger he was now sharing his apartment with - made him breakfast and called him handsome? he snaps out of his daze when daehwi grabs his arm and drags him to the kitchen.

if jinyoung had to name one thing he had learnt about daehwi over the course of 2 weeks - was that the smaller boy was exceptionally clingy. oh, and adorable too.

jinyoung doesn't know how he ended up with daehwi in his lap, leaning against his chest on their couch, watching movies. it was a friday night and neither of the two had plans to leave the house. by the 2nd movie, jinyoung was already sound asleep.

be wakes up at 4am to make a trip to the bathroom - he realises he's in his bed, which is definitely not where he fell asleep. he pokes his head out of his door, and daehwi is still there, wide awake, onto the 4th movie already.

the taller boy is secretly envious of the latter - daehwi didn't go to school. when questioned, he simply said he was taking a year's break to "realize stuff". daehwi could pull all-nighters and do practically anything he wanted, while jinyoung was a (not-so-anymore) broke college student struggling to keep his eyes open in class.

once again, jinyoung doesn't know how, but daehwi somehow ended up being his best friend. the boy was similar to him in a way that they both rarely left the house. as much as jinyoung hated to admit it, he was a sucker for skinship ; and he's always wanted to have someone to hug to sleep. he now does have someone - daehwi. his heart feels like it's about to explode sometimes - he doesn't know what this feeling is. is this love?

friends share the same bed although they have their own rooms, friends kiss each other on the cheek, friends cuddle, friends shower together, right? this, this is all platonic, right?

"hyung, are you single?" the blonde boy currently straddling jinyoung asks. jinyoung nearly chokes on his coffee. 

"yeah."

"you've never had a boyfriend?"

"yeah. never."

"but hyung, you're so handsome. and you're so lovely," jinyoung snickers, and shakes his head.

"no! hyung, you're the best-"

jinyoung doesn't know when the younger's lips had looked so plump and soft, but he quickly learns that he posesses zero self-control when he cups daehwi's face and leans forward to kiss him. he thinks he's going crazy - his heart has never pounded so fast before.

"no, daehwi-yah, it's not what you think it is-"

"yeah, staying up late just to wait for you to come home, only to see you drunk with some woman at the club? right." daehwi spat, anger brazen on his face. "

she's just a friend, hwi," jinyoung sighs, head in his hands. it was true - he was just drinking with the president of his club.

"whatever, go spend more time with your friend, then. we've been together for a year and a half now, i can't believe you'd pull this shit on me," daehwi's furious, and storms out the door before jinyoung can even stop him.

shit. there i go, fucking up everything once again.

niel: wtf happened

baejin: i dont fucking know ok i fucked shit up

niel: :( daehwi's w me and ong rn

baejin: take care of him

baejin: sorry

baejin: i always mess up

"hyung? i'm so, i don't like seeing jinyoung with other people! i don't feel good!" daehwi screams, startling the couple, who were sitting on the couch.

"jealousy? anger?" daniel looks at his boyfriend, confused.

"how in the fuck-"

jinyoung swears to never let daehwi go so easily again. he's glad he has the smaller boy back in his arms. he falls asleep with the latter as his teddy bear. he's been told by others that he seems a lot happier now - and jinyoung thinks it's true. daehwi is the epitome of perfection, it's as if his hands were made for jinyoung ; and jinyoung only. his first love - and his first kiss, his first time holding hands with someone else. jinyoung always felt empty, but with daehwi, he felt complete. jinyoung hopes he never loses him.

jinyoung learns that good things don't last forever when he finds daehwi, laying on the living room floor, pale, eyes shut, with no sign of life whatsoever. 

“daehwi, can you hear hyung? yah, daehwi!" jinyoung shakes him, and he freezes once he hits the cold, hard reality - daehwi's heart isn't beating.

"daehwi, don't scare hyung! it isn't funny!" he shakes him once again, using his phone to call for an ambulance.

"doctor, is he okay?" jinyoung stands up when the doors burst open.

"kid, is this a prank?" the doctor, dongho, according to his nametag, asks.

"what?" jinyoung shakes his head in disbelief.

"why would you bring a robot to a hospital?"

"what? he's my boyf-"

"kid, he's a robot. do we have to unscrew all of this mechanism to prove it to you?" dongho raises an eyebrow.

jinyoung's hair is all messed up, his eyes are puffy and tears are falling from them. he can't believe what's happening.

"he's human - his heartbeat stopped just now, doctor, just help him!"

"he never had a heartbeat. he's a robot."

jinyoung cries even harder, when jisung and minhyun drag him away to the carpark of the hospital. his 7 other friends are waiting for him there.

"you, you knew all along, right?" jinyoung storms up to daniel and grabs him by the collar. "yeah, i knew. we just wanted to help you, jinyoung-" he stutters and minhyun has to step in before jinyoung can throw a punch at daniel.

"all of you knew, too? you all knew he wasn't human?" jinyoung screams, and the 9 nod their head in shame.

"so is this what your fucking shady ass company is about?" he glares at seongwoo and daniel, voice all hoarse, the two looking the most guilty out of all of the boys.

"jinyoung, let us explain," seongwoo puts a hand on jinyoung's shoulder, but jinyoung slaps it away.

"don't talk to me." and with that, jinyoung leaves.

he can't believe it - daehwi, his first love, the one that completed him ; was just a robot. jinyoung laughs bitterly as he walks down the street.

he knew things were too good to be true. who would fall in love with him, anyway?

a/n im so sorry for what ive done

inspo credits go to @/leedaehwi on ao3 for the social media au part!!