#ok I think that covers all the spoiler tags
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THEY MADE A FUCKING STATUE IN HIS HONOR A MORHERFUCKING STATUE TO THAT ABUSIVE PIECE OF SHIT DOMESTIC TERRORIST FUCKHOLE
AND OF COURSE ADRIEN DOESNT FIND OUT ANYTHING. HE GETS RO KEEP HIA AMOK BUT LOL HE SOESNT FIND OUT HIS FATHWR WAS AN ABUSIVE FUCKBUCKET
WHAT RHE FUCK WAA RHE POINT OF HIM FIGHTING HIS FATHEE IN REPRESENTATION IF THEY WERE JUST FONNA MAKE HIM SEE HIS FATHER AS A HERO IN RHE END WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY GIVE HIM CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT LIKE THAT JUST TO WIPE IT AWAY LIKE IT SIDNT FUCKING MATTER IMAGINE BEING AN ABUSE VICTIK AND SEEING YOU ABUSER AS A HERO LIKE WTF WHERE IS HIS FUCKING AGENCY MOTHERFUCKER
CAN YOU TELL I HAVE FEELINGS ABOUT THIS OMFG I AM SO ANGRY
ALSO ALSO ALSO SO IF MARINETTE IS NEVER GOING TK TELL HIM ANYTHING ABOUT HIS FATHER OR BEING A SENTI IS SHE JUAT GOING TO CARRY RHAT SECRET FOEVWER???
OH YEAH BECAUSE THATS SURE TO MAKE FOR A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP RIGHT THERE OK NOT LIKE SHE NEEDS ANY MORE TRAUMA LMAO
WILL SEASON 6 FUCKING FIX THIS? FUCK I HOPE SO
Ok rant over I’m gonna scroll the tag and/or Twitter for a bit and go to bed, it’s 3:25am.
Please don’t come at me for this post. I’ve been holding all of this in since I watched Recreation in storyboard form months ago. I knew this was coming. It doesn’t make me any less angry.
Also yadda yadda Lila is the next Hawkmoth, woo fuckin hoo. I wonder what freaked her out there in the end though.
#miraculous ladybug#ml spoilers#miraculous ladybug spoilers#ml s5 spoilers#ml s5 finale#ml s5 finale spoilers#ml conformation#conformation spoilers#ml recreation#recreation spoilers#ok I think that covers all the spoiler tags#ml salt
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here's that essay i accidently hyped up (sorry) on how fionna & cake did a poor job of concluding betty & simons characters + story in the final 2 episodes. sorry it is so insanely long. i don't know what my deal is. sometimes a show just does such a bad job of handling your favorite characters that you have to write 19k+ words complaining about it, i guess. im linking it as a pdf bc i DO NOT want to have 2 copy & paste this all over to tumblr & i kinda don't think tumblr would be happy with me making a post that long.
#if it sucks uhm. be nice to me pls 👉👈#ik im very snarky & kinda harsh in this but like. i rlly dont usually share my thoughts on media like this much#im ok w hearing rebuttals btw. but also its not likley youll change my mind#im really happy other ppl enjoyed this ending (& also kinda jealous)#but i very definitely. dont like it#not just from a personal standpoint but in that#i just genuinely think the portrayal of simon & betty was done really poorly#things r bolded + theres random section titles that interupt the flow#bc even tho i wrote this much i do genuinely have reading comprehension issues#as in the actual definition of poor reading comprension. due to disability#not the tumblr thing where its for some reason used to mean ' bad at understanding media ' sometimes#oh yea also the font is big bc of this too#im nervou s abt this but too late now ig#fionna and cake spoilers#im not putting it in the tags its 4 the ppl who already know abt it#its emberassing that i wrote all this but i think its worse if i dont share it bc then i just. have it#mmmm..worst part is i dont even cover everything. i have MORE complaints#text
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Manifesting this theory(?) for the future chaptersss
I want and need Quanxi and Denji to form an alliance/friendship/mentorship of sort and look each other in the eye and say :
"you know what? Ms. Makima there killed our f(r)iends. She killed my girlfiends (ahah see what I did there -sorry) and obliterated your friend. We should get our girls back :)"
And since when devils are killed on Earth are reborn in Hell and viceversa, I want them to go to Hell and
Fuck. Shit. Up
Until they find the blood devil, the cosmo devil and everyone alse so that they can make friends with them again and live happily ever after where I'm sure nothing bad will happen to them again like some weird cult shit and the four horseman of the apocalypse or---
#Chainsaw Man#csm#csm spoilers#chainsaw man spoilers#chainsaw man 140#csm 140#spoiler#csm meta#ok I think we're covered for spoilers tried to tag them all#Quanxi#Denji Hayakawa#pls God let them have one good day
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girls when they just finished watching aotv
#ok this is my review#i didnt 'just finished watching' but u get it wtv#louis tomlinson#all of those voices#ok unless u wanna b spoiled u need to get off these tags rn!#i honestly thought there'd be more of the songwriting producing planning and bts footage of him working on his music#like i thought that'd be the main focus#more..... artistry and musicianship things yk? this thought made me want a behind the album doc so bad djfjf#but i do get it bc he set touring up as his ultimate goal as a solo artist. he said early on how it's his fave part in onedee#now im not saying touring ≠ artistry bc duh going on tour is fundamental for artists and for some like louis- it's what they love most#anyw thats just me. a behind the album doc could easily fix this. kinda my fault for expecting a whole different narrative hahshdj#OKAY BUT ANYWAY the first half was jam-packed with lots of feelings. heart rending gut wenching soul crushing stuff#it was so emotional i was with my sister and i didnt wanna cry beside her but i just couldnt help it 😭#him and his family talking in depth about their loss felt gutteral. strong family... about his mom and about felicite#hm yeah </3 mmkay thats a wrap we dont need me sobbing again thinking about this family#so about the touring!! we see him struggling to find his feet to perform confidently through the years#yk... last 1d performance in xfuk. jho for xfuk. ultra fest too i think? ...ccme. telehit. scala... 2 walls tour (2020) shows in spain#aotv spoilers#its actually insane how massive his insecurities became during and post 1d 😭#bro was acting small roles as a child. was 'popular' in school. lead singer in a cover band. main lead in grease & auditioned for xfactor#and post 1d??? man didnt know what to do with himself. it's sooo!!!!!!!!#it's evil actually leave that man's poor confidence alone! 😭#the doc ended beautifully :> showing scenes of his show in milan. 30k+ people. ONLY there for louis!#by this point hes built up enough confidence to perform btm live for the first time!!!!! hard song to sing and he smashed it 🥹#the title truly encapsulates everything huh. voices in his head. voices of industry ppl whispering in his ear. voices of criticism. and#voices of fans cheering and singing his songs#cathartic ending 🫶🏼 loved aotv!!! when btm played girl you Know i was gone 😭#loved that he included the fitf uk no.1 too!!! it's a pretty little bow to this wonderful gift#i would Love to add more but i reached 30 tags LMAOOO yk what maybe i'll rb this with more tags😭💀#louis u deserve the world the moon the stars entire planets and all the galaxies 🫂 mwuah
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amazon marketing is so good at marketing itself as very pro lgbt+ but only if it means spoiling the series to people (see good omens and the leaked "every" spoiler*), but when it comes to actually marketing the single lgbt+ serie? I've never seen either good omens or hazbin hotel on the front page.
HELL YESSSSSS! (I am a bit salty that you don't see it in their Amazon Originals section on the "front page", but whatever)
#well there was that lgbt+ british crown fanfiction movie briefly#on the home page#but in general amazon isn't too keen to promote its own series (good omens coughcough)#so I can imagine how much interest they could have for a series that isn't even produced by them#but just distributed on their platform#*well ok here's the tea (spoilers for s2 of good omens):#good omens was announced to come out (haha) in July of 2023#so amazon marketing department thought it'd be cool to spoil the final kiss between the two main characters#(who had never been announced as a couple before-imagine Sherlock and John or Dean and Cas suddenly kissing-it was THAT big of a deal)#like 90% of the fandom wasn't expecting them to become a real in-your-face couple ... so it was meant as a surprise#but amazon marketing department had other ideas:#so in June 2023 they released a compilation of all their gay kisses sped up-to celebrate pride (which is... so on the nose but I digress)#and yes! One of those kisses was Azi and Crowley from good omens (it was right in the beginning too...) but the series HADN'T AIRED YET#I think the video compilation stayed online for 3 whole days before someone noticed#and the fandom obviously exploded#also because they spoiled what was meant to be a twist and a delicate moment just to score cheap brownie points during pride.#So our series was spoiled to exploit the visibility that lgbt+ community has had in the recent years...#annoying but it made for some funny memes ('every' was the name of the leak because the word that covered their kiss was 'every' lol)#babbelbabbles#about#fandom lore#good omens lore#these tags are longer than the declaration of indipendence#sorry#edit: ok this was queued a looong time ago and now that hazbin hotel has been making big numbers#suddenly amazon has been marketing it much better than it did before#but I'm still salty at how we basically didn't get any promo for s2 of gomens especially here in Italy
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BDSMaid - Chapter 6
Series Summary: After recently graduating you take what is supposed to be a job to save money before you go back to university to get your law degree. Your best friend offers you a job cleaning luxury homes for clients you’ll never know. Easy. Simple. Mundane. Until one of your clients is home and everything you felt was missing in your life starts to fall into place. This goes against the NDA you signed and you could get fired. Or worse, you could fall in love.
CW: 18+ MDNI. In order to avoid spoilers, all tags are under the cut in small red lettering. Reader does have some body descriptions so more of an oc than female reader.
AN: I don't think I understood the term "labour of love" until right now. I'm emotionally exhausted yet so fucking proud at the same time. Thank you @lotusbxtch for fixing all my grammar and formatting. I also couldn't of done this without @mermaidgirl30 , @littlevenicebitch69, @alltheirdamn, and @for-a-longlongtime (even if you did just try to distract me with Santi the entire time LOL)
Word Count: 14.6k (sorry, grab a snack or two)
Series Masterlist | My Masterlist | AO3
CW: use of petnames, mention of losing a spouse, mentions of child abuse (mostly verbal), use of nick names (baby, sweet girl, etc.), dirty talk, spanking, sexual activity in public, kissing, protected p in v, oral (female receiving), consumption of alcohol, mutual pining, mentions of falling in love, Dom/sub dynamics.
You: 911, I need to go buy a dress, but ya’ll can’t ask me what it’s for Laren: no strings attached shopping? Fuck yeah! You: I’m serious though Laren: Dude, I won’t ask you as long as you don’t ask about the hickey on my neck Jamie: Damn, my dad’s in California so I can’t leave the office. You: hmm…maybe we just tell each other one secret each Laren: oh sorry, forgot I have to vacuum my cat today, can’t shop You: fine, no asking about the hickey. Pick you up at noon? Jamie: Have fun. I need a sugar daddy. Odette: booo! I’m studying. Someone alert me when we learn about the hickey.
You
Laren’s jaw drops as you step out of the dressing room, the soft silk of the floor length black gown skims against your body. Your eyes trail down the thin straps along your shoulders and down the deep v that sits low on your sternum. You’ve never appreciated your small breasts until now. The risque cut has a soft and romantic feel. Somehow, so does the long slit up your one leg, stopping much higher than most black tie venues would find acceptable. You spin to take in the way the silk dips low on your back. Yeah, Joel Miller is going to love this.
“You look stunning. I’m not gonna ask, but whoever you’re wearing that for is going to fall in love with you. I might fall in love with you.”
You laugh at her, watching as she tugs the collar of her sweater up to cover the very prominent purple hickey on her pulse point. If only she knew how ridiculous that statement really was. Joel Miller, your dom, falling in love with you. It’s impossible.
The big box that you stuffed the small, pink and bedazzled box in snickers in your mind then taunts you in her uppity British accent. He loves you, remember how he held your hand so tenderly through that last orgasm? “It’s a date”, “It’s only you”.
You shake your head and run your hands down your torso and hips, the silk feeling like water under your hands.
“Wow, that dress was made for you.” The peppy store clerk says as she rounds the corner to the dressing room. “Oh! I have just the accessory, if you don’t mind me showing you?”
You nod and then look over at Laren through the mirror. The two of you haven’t been friends for that long, but it doesn’t take a genius to realize she’s not wearing her massive engagement ring, plus that giant love bite; something is off. “I’m not gonna ask about the hickey, but are you ok?”
“Ya - I’m fine, why?” Her phone goes off in her purse for what feels like the hundredth time since you picked her up. She hasn’t looked at it once and this newest alert doesn’t change that.
“No reason. I’m here for you though. I hope you know that.” The corners of her mouth lift, but that vivacious sparkle in her eye doesn’t make an appearance.
You spend longer than you ever had getting ready on Friday. You’ve shaved, exfoliated and moisturized every inch of your skin. You painted your fingers and toes with a fresh coat of pearly white polish, noticing that the skin around your cuticles on your hands isn’t picked clean. For the first time in your life, your anxiety hasn’t needed its usual outlet; picking and pushing at your nails until they’re clean. Even with the last few days kicking your ass, Mister Miller made it better, made you better.
After about three hours, you’ve completed the look: big loose curls, one side pinned behind one ear with a gold clip, exposing the soft slope of your neck that Joel loves to press his lips to. You’ve opted for a neutral glam look; a light smokey grey eye, flirty lashes, a touch of blush and highlighter and a nude lip.
You keep the jewelry simple, just thin gold hoop earrings and two dainty golden chains, the accessories that the sales girl picked out. The first chain is the longest; one end loops tight to your throat then lays down your sternum, a small clip on the other end holds it in place to the lacy black thong you bought for the occasion. The second chain wraps around your exposed thigh. A few small crystals dangle off the garter. It feels perfect for a sex club, almost like you’re being tied up in gold.
After wrapping the gift you bought for Joel today you debate taping the dress in place. It’s a sex club, surely a nip slip isn’t the worst thing that can happen. However, Joel would probably forcefully remove anyone who got a peek. As tempting as it is to witness that, you decide to save his sanity for one more day and after placing the last piece of tape you hear the rev of his engine coming down your street. Butterflies erupt in your stomach, it’s been weeks since you’ve heard that sound. That deep rumble will probably always fill you with an excited anticipation of seeing Mister Miller.
You agreed to let him pick you up tonight since Odette is out. You slip your perfectly pedicured toes into black heeled sandals, working the small golden buckle around the ankle quickly as Joel’s shiny black Jag parks in front of your building. You watch from the window as he gets out of the driver's side door, flowers wrapped in brown paper clutched in his hand. A man that size doesn’t look like he’d fit in that sleek sports car.
Even from your birdseye view from the fourth floor he looks absolutely gorgeous. You’re sure once he’s right in front of you he’ll be devastatingly handsome, especially once he’s added the gift you got him. Similar to you, he’s in all black tonight.
The beep of his car locking and the buzz of your door go at the same time and you excitedly hit the button to let him up. It feels like hours before there’s a light knock on your front door. After a shaky breath, you open the door.
Fuuuuuck me, you think as you take him in and actively stop yourself from drooling.
He looks as hot as sin dressed in all black, the lapels of the jacket and the tie slightly silky against the flat black of the rest of his clothing. He’s the living, breathing epitome of JMKink right now. Dressed like that matte black letterhead he still leaves you notes on when you clean for him. You lick your lips as your eyes trail back up his tie. Fuck, you want him to wrap it around your wrists.
He steps into your front entrance and the apartment feels so much smaller; almost like he takes up every bit of space and simultaneously sucks all the air out of you. His hair is parted to the side, trimmed neatly around his ears, curls perfectly placed. You’re sure it was effortless on his part, just running his fingers through it after getting out of the shower, towel wrapped low on his hips. Your mouth waters as you continue to just stare at one another.
Joel
“Wow,” he finally manages to rasp. His throat feels like it's full of sand all of a sudden. He clears it gently before continuing. “You look…you’re always beautiful, but you are…”
His eyes travel up and down your body again, he’s feeling lost for words which is not something that happens to him often. He watches your bottom lip slip between your teeth, waiting for him to form a thought.
“Sorry, sweet girl, I need a second here.” He places the bouquet of wildflowers on the small table at the entry then reaches out towards you. He actually feels like he might die if he doesn’t kiss you soon. The whorls and calluses of his fingers drag down the warm, soft skin of your arm gently before he closes his hand around yours. Usually, he loves how small your hand looks in his, but he’s finding it impossibly hard to break eye contact with you right now. As he steps in closely you smile sweetly at him and he’s surrounded by the smell of mint, lavender and something distinctly you. “You look life-alteringly gorgeous. I’m not sure if that’s a word, but wow, Freckles.”
You place your free hand on his chest and he’s sure you can feel how hard his heart is pounding behind his chest. Fuck, he wouldn’t be surprised if you could hear his heart at this point. He cups your face with his other hand and presses his lips to yours, reveling in the way you melt into him, parting your lips and letting him deepen the kiss. He swallows the quiet moan that you make just for him. You pull away too quickly for him, an excited smile across your face.
“I got you something!” You spin and he’s left breathless again by the low back of the dress and the way the silk skirt sways with your hips.
“You didn’t have to do that,” he says, following you into the living area of your small apartment. “I don’t want you spending your money on me, sweetheart.”
You spin again and his cock twitches as he catches just how high the slit of the skirt is, and the golden jewelry wrapped around your thigh. In your hands is a large, light brown box tied with a black ribbon. “Technically, I spent your money on you,” you say with a wink. “Open it.”
He steps in close, watching your face go from excited to downright giddy as he pulls at the ribbon. He slips the lid off the box and stares down at the exact same black Stetson that he sent with Tiffany. His heart stops beating as the memories, both good and bad, flood through him. This is the same hat he wore the night he met her, the night of their first date, the night he told her he loved her for the first time, the night he married her. Joel Miller doesn’t believe in signs from the universe, but this? This is something.
No, he thinks as emotions start to clog his throat. This was Tiffany.
He blinks away the tears that threaten to form behind his eyes and whispers your name. “Thank you, sweetheart. I - I used to have a hat just like this.”
When he looks back at you your brows are furrowed together, a genuine curiosity across your face. “Used to?”
He clears his throat again, “Yea, it’s complicated, but this - this means more to me than you could ever know.”
He slips his hands into the box, the felt of the brim spreads a warm comfort up his hands and forearms. He swallows hard as he realizes it’s the same comfort he feels when he has you in his arms.
Oh my god…I think, no, I know. I love you.
It hits him so hard that he has to clutch the hat tighter in his hands to ground himself as he pulls it from the box. He knew he was falling, he knew the second he saw you. He can’t push it down anymore.
“I’m sorry if I overstepped, Joel.”
He turns the hat over in his hands, the black satin liner exactly like his old one. He looks up at you, no longer able to stop the smile or the tears that flood his lash line. Your lips part as your eyes dance around his.
“No, baby, you didn’t. I’ve, well, I’ve been really missing this hat lately.”
“You gonna try it on, cowboy?” The sultry flirtiness of your voice feels sweet on his skin and after a shallow breath he brings the hat up to his head. As the satin slips over his hair a calm confidence washes over him. His eyes meet yours and your flirty smile turns shy as you blush under his gaze. He’s whole again.
“So?”
“I’m gonna have to fight the women off, I think.” You say softly.
He laughs, moving the box from your hands back to the table and then cradling your face in his hands. “I’ll only be looking at one woman, my sweet girl.” His lips meet yours gently, your tongue swiping softly against his lip as your slant into the kiss.
I love you.
You
You weren’t sure what kind of reaction you’d get from Joel giving him the hat, but his eyes welling up and his breathing getting all shaky was not what you expected. Something about that hat called to you when you saw it. When you picked it up, the soft felt against your palms reminded you of how it feels to be in Joel’s hands.
He breaks the kiss with a sigh and glances around your apartment. Months ago you would have felt shy or self conscious about Joel in your space, so wholly different from his, but he has never judged you for anything, and you feel yourself becoming more and more comfortable with him which is not a feeling you’re used to. His eyes fall to the scratched wooden coffee table that you got for free from Craigslist.
“You have college letters,” he says proudly, looking back at you.
Your arms cross across your body subconsciously, like they’re trying to shield you from the possibility of being rejected again. “Ya, the last two came today. I’ll open them later.”
“Baby, let's open them! It could be good news.”
He looks so goddamn handsome, in a suit that probably costs more than the entire contents of your apartment and his new black Stetson hat. His expression is encouraging, that same look from his kitchen when you ate some toast; prideful and empathetic.
“I’m scared,” you almost blurt, wishing you could be smoother with this man. “I don’t want to ruin tonight. If these are both no’s, I don’t know how great of company I’ll be tonight.”
“Freckles, I’m not going to force you into anything you don’t want. But I think you’ll be thinking of the letters either way.”
“Ah, my consent stands even for mail,” you joke.
“Well, it's a federal offense to open someone else's mail so…” Joel winks and flashes a devastating smile your way.
“Ok,” you close your eyes and take a deep breath. He’s right, you’ll be wondering all night what those letters say, and Joel has a way of making you forget, making you feel understood, important and cared for. “Do it.”
As if he’s a child on Christmas morning and you just gave him the ok, he snatches up the University of Austin and Berkeley letters, almost vibrating as he says, “Which one first?”
You start to pace the few steps of your living room, wringing your hands together as your heels click on the cheap laminate hardwood. “Austin, I’ll be less upset by a no from them.”
The tear of the envelope sounds like a dagger to the ribs as you go to grab the flowers Joel brought for you, desperate for something to do besides stand there.
“It’s a thick envelope..” Joel says as he slides the letter out.
“Ya, I’ve learned that that doesn’t mean shit,” You say sardonically.
Joel laughs in surprise, “Always shocks me to hear that pretty little mouth swear.”
“Yea?” You ask, “Open the fucking letter, you’re killing me.”
Joel snorts as his strong fingers gingerly fold open the letter. His eyes shoot to yours, “You got in!”
“W-What?” You drop the flowers on the counter top and cover your mouth.
“Sweet girl, you got in. I’m - I’m so fucking proud of you.”
You stand frozen on the spot. It’s not the school you wanted, you want Berkeley, but it doesn’t matter what that letter says now, because either way, you’re going to be a lawyer.
“Oh my god,” you breathe as Joel's arms pull you in for a tight hug.
“Congratulations, baby girl.” His lips press to hair and you start to laugh. “What’s so funny?”
You both part from the hug as you fight to stop tears of pure joy from ruining your makeup. “It’s just…you know, for a second there I actually thought that I wasn’t smart enough. Me? I have a 4.0, I graduated early, I’ve been top of my class for years and I actually thought that I wouldn’t get in.”
Joel's eyes dance, a big smile across his face as he watches you fill a vase. “Open the other one.”
He keeps his eyes on you as he opens the next letter. As he folds open the thick eggshell coloured paper you plunge the flowers into the cold water, his face drops and you prepare yourself for the worst, “You got in. Baby, you - you got in.”
You - Four Years Prior
“So what? You think that getting into your fancy university in Texas means you can just leave Arizona whenever you please? Your mom needs you, you can’t just leave.” Your dad is in his patchwork recliner, a beer in his hand despite it being nine in the morning. The hot June morning heating the small house to an uncomfortable stifle.
“I’ve contributed as much as I can, dad. Two months from now I’m not going to have any time to myself. I deserve some time doing what I want.”
Your dad snorts, legs slamming the leg rest down on the recliner. “You’re an ungrateful little bitch, aren’t you?”
That should sting, it would to anyone else, but you’ve been called every name possible by your father. You see him now for what he truly is, a loser. He can’t hold a job, hasn’t been able to for years. When you were younger, you thought you were the apple of his eye. He’d show up to every school function, every award ceremony, all the little things. You were eight when you realized he didn’t even speak to you at those functions, just walked around bragging about how he was the reason you’ve achieved whatever you were being celebrated over. It was his time to shine, his award, not yours.
“I’m going,” you say, hoisting your duffle bag of clothing over your shoulder. You’ve always wanted to go back to California. You went once with your mother when you were nine or ten, and the minute you got to the beach and felt the warm sand between your toes everything went quiet. It’s called out to you ever since.
As you spin towards the front door you hear the groan of your dad standing up. Fear spikes in your veins, your heart slamming in your ribs. He’s never hit you, but with the redness of his face as he called you names this morning you wouldn’t put it past him.
“Like fuck you are!” He bellows as a hard object strikes the back of your head, followed by warm liquid soaking through the back of your t-shirt.
One of your hands cups the back of your head as you bolt towards your recently purchased, and slightly rusted, SUV. “Get back in here right now you little cunt! You stole money from me for that vehicle, didn’t you?”
You can’t help but laugh as you get in the front seat. You don’t bother locking the doors, you know he’s barely out the front door without looking. He’s not strong enough, and definitely too drunk, to overpower you. You throw the vehicle into reverse and yell out the window, “You don’t have any money for me to steal, Doug!”
You hit his first name hard, knowing damn well how much it will enrage him. You drive away without looking back, and you only stop once for gas for the next ten hours.
The sun is setting as you reach the motel in Newport Beach. You head straight for the beach, kicking off your sandals and letting your feet sink into the cool sand. Your phone vibrates in your pocket, “Mom” across the screen in bold letters.
“Hi,” you say sheepishly, still feeling like a child even though you aren’t.
“Get our ass home, right fucking now. You’re supposed to be contributing to this family and somehow you had enough money to buy a car? And a trip to California? Mark my words, young lady. If you don’t walk back through that door by this time tomorrow, I will come there and get you myself!”
A lump forms in your throat. You’ve spent your whole childhood trying to get them to see you. Contributing? None of your friends had to contribute, they all got to be kids. You’re going to be making a lot of money as a lawyer one day, and they can go fuck themselves if they think they’re getting a single penny of that money.
“I’m afraid I won’t be doing that, mother.”
“You’re in for a rude fucking awakening, little girl. Just because you were the smartest person here, does not mean you’ll be the smartest person anywhere else. The world is going to chew you up and spit you out, and your father and I will not be here to fix you.”
“I don’t see how that’s any different than now. Good bye.”
You hang up before she can respond and look out over the water. The sun is setting in a kaleidoscope of peaches, marigolds and lavenders. You block your parents' numbers before snapping a picture of the sunset and setting it as your background. A sense of calm washes over you as the waves crash along the shore. You walk towards the water and dip your feet in, the water washing away the last eighteen years of your life. You’re free.
You - Present Day
A whispered ‘holy shit’ is all you can muster as realization washes over you. Your dream school - and you got in. You can go to the beach and listen to the ocean, feel the sand under your feet. You can feel as free as you did almost four years ago. You lock eyes with Joel. Can you really leave him?
“I can’t believe I got in. To two schools. I’m going to be a lawyer.” Excitement floods your body. You can worry about deciding later, even though deep down you already know what you're going to choose. Right now, you can just be happy and proud. He reaches a hand out to you and you step into the living room to take it. He pulls you in, wrapping you in his strong arms.
“I know I said this already, but I am so god damn proud of you, sweet girl. No one deserves this more than you. I want to celebrate this with you soon, please?”
“Well,” you say with a hint of mischief, pulling back to look at him, “We are going to be at the club.”
His eyes flash with something you’ve never seen before. “Ya - the club.”
“Oh my god. We’re late, Joel!” You push out of his hold. This is his big night, his five year anniversary of owning his club.
“Baby, stop,” he pulls you into his arms again and cups your face. “I don’t care. Just let me kiss you until you need to reapply that lipstick, and then we can go.” His lips crash passionately into yours. “I’m so fucking proud of you, sweet girl,” he gasps between kisses.
Joel wasn’t lying. He really did kiss you until your lips were swollen and you had to touch up not only your lipstick but the bit of highlighter on your nose; he also needed to participate, taking one of your makeup wipes to his nose, chin and lips before opening the door to his Jag for you and speeding off to the club.
Upon entering the club, the two of you were separated almost immediately. Joel was whisked away to the stage where he, Tommy and who you assume is Tess are now. The stage is lit up as he gives a speech and thanks everyone. A glass of champagne is handed to you as you stand along the edge of the bar. Everyone claps and as he tries to make his way back to you is pulled into a handshake from a very wealthy looking older man. You smile into your glass of expensive pink champagne as the woman from the stage approaches you.
“Hi! I’m sorry for having to steal him the moment you two walked in.” She extends a perfectly manicured hand out to you. “I’m Tess.”
You go to introduce yourself and she cuts you off as she continues. “Oh, I know who you are. Joel will probably kill me, but we have all been very interested to meet you.”
“All?” you say, swallowing nervously.
She shrugs. “No one has ever seen him this, hmm, this relaxed before. He’s usually here or across the street barking orders. You don’t become as successful as him without a little stress, but since you came along he seems different. Happy.”
You blush, watching him engrossed in a new conversation, his eyes often meeting yours across the room. “Look,” Tess says, stepping closer and lowering her voice. “I hang around the Millers way too often and I could really use some girl talk. Is that ok?”
“Tess, if there’s one thing I’m good at, it’s girl talk.” You smile at her and then turn to the bartender. “Two tequila shots, please!”
She takes a breath, looking at Joel and then back at you. “I’m just going to cut right to the chase. I didn’t think I’d live to see the day where Joel wore a black cowboy hat again.”
You raise an eyebrow at Tess, this could be your chance to get an explanation around his response. You know you weren’t imagining his eyes getting glassy, and he did say it means more to him than he could ever tell you. “I got him that hat.”
Tess’s jaw drops and panic rises in your chest. “What? Why? What’s wrong with the hat?”
“Tequila first,” she says as the shots slide across the shiny black marble bar top. A shiver racks through Tess after she swallows, you don’t flinch. “I don’t know if it’s my place…”
“It’s girl talk, he’ll never know.” You state, sucking at the lime. Tess clears her throat and motions to the bartender for another round. The next time she speaks it’s a hushed, sad voice, just barely above a whisper.
“He, umm - well, he had a hat just like that growing up. Wore it all the time actually. He had it on the night he met Tiffany, and pretty much every important day in his life since then. Their first date, their wedding. Shit, I’m pretty sure there’s a picture of Sarah as a newborn in that hat. He also wore it the last time he held her.” Her voice trails off and heartbreak for her friend lines her features. “He…she loved it so much that he sent it with her.”
You swallow hard and glance past Tess’s shoulder to Joel across the club. The moments of time between each of your heartbeats are filled by memories of his reaction. Tess continues, “Look, maybe you're like Joel. Maybe you don’t believe in astronomy or signs from the universe, but I don’t think you finding that hat was a coincidence.”
You aren’t like Joel; you do believe in signs. You thought you were going crazy when you found that hat today. It literally called to you from inside the store. It wasn’t on display in the window. No, you heard someone call your name behind you and when you looked over your shoulder the hat was all you could see. Could that voice have been from the wife he lost too early? You catch Joel’s gaze across the room; something about him, even before you knew him, comforted you. As your mind starts running through the depth of what that hat means to him he winks, you think you might be falling for him.
All of this means something. It has to mean something. Right?
“Girl talk stays between us?” You ask shyly.
“Absolutely!” Tess exclaims, you like her more and more and can see yourself being very good friends with her, even if she is almost twice your age.
“Tequila first,” you say in the same way she did earlier.
She clicks her glass against yours and then on the bar top before slamming the shot back. “I hate tequila,” she rasps while sucking the lime.
“I can’t talk to my girlfriends about this. I don’t know if you know how me and Joel met, but one of my best friends is sort of my boss and I would get fired from my job for knowing him.” Tess nods, and orders you both a glass of what you’re sure is very expensive rosé. “Sometimes Joel says things that make me feel like maybe we are more than a sub and a dom, but that’s ridiculous, right? It’s the heat of the moment.”
“Babe, do you know how long Joel has been doing this?” She asks gently.
You shake your head and take a sip of your wine.
“Years…at one point, being a dom was how he made money. He’s a professional.”
Her words feel like a lead weight in the pit of your stomach, bile starts to burn at your throat. The whiplash of thinking he’s falling, and knowing that you are, and now dealing with this is almost too much. Joel has moved onto a conversation with yet another guest. “Right, he’s good. He’s supposed to make me feel wanted. I think I’m just not used to someone being there.”
“That’s not what I’m saying,” Tess’s hand comes to grab yours, squeezing reassuringly. “Professional doms don’t say things in the heat of the moment. They don’t give false hopes. If he’s calling you his or struggling to follow limits, that’s Joel speaking, not his dom alter ego.”
The silence after her words is thick between you. He doesn’t say things in the heat of the moment? You swallow the lead weight that’s made its way from your stomach to your throat, your mind racing through all the things Joel has said to you. My sweet girl. It’s a date. It’s only you.
“Hey,” Tess says, shaking your hand to bring you back. “This DJ sucks, should we go take over the booth?”
You smile, grateful not only for her words of wisdom but now the way she’s able to stop you from spiraling. “Yes, this is a club AND a friday afterall!”
She smiles at you mischievously as she reaches over the bar for the bottle of rosé and then links arms with you as you both practically skip to the booth. “Owning a club is so fun, I recommend everyone try it,” she proclaims through a laugh.
When you reach the booth she waltzes right up to the DJ, “We need dancing music, it’s Friday, it’s a club, and it’s a fucking party!”
“Sorry, Tess. I can’t do that. Joel wanted background music only.” The DJ, who barely looks old enough to be in a club says, his eyes wandering to the low cut of your dress. A few months ago you probably would have been endeared by that look, but you have a real man now. A real man who loves you, says the sparkling box of feelings.
Tess snorts and then tuts at the poor guy. “Joel won’t appreciate you ogling what belongs to him like that. So play Best Friend by Saweetie or I’ll be sure to let him know.”
His eyes snap back to his booth set up, one hand held up in defeat, the other pushing a few buttons and then turning the volume dial up. You and Tess laugh, taking sips straight from the bottle as you move to the dance floor. This is what you need, a friend to help you dissect what’s been happening. A friend who understands the dom and sub relationship, but more importantly, understands Joel. Does him having feelings change how you feel about university? You’ve always seen yourself going to Berkeley, that’s been the dream, but now?
Maybe you should just end this now before your feelings grow too far out of control. The box of feelings laughs. You have no idea how deep you are in this, do you?
Joel
I’m gonna kill that little shit. Frustration rolls through his body as the music grows louder and as he turns to shoot daggers at the DJ he sees you and Tess. Your beautiful face is lit up in a large smile as you sip directly from a $400 bottle of rosé. His anger dissipates as you move your body with a sexy sway, lost in the music.
Joel moves towards the bar, never taking his eyes off of you. Your arms stretch over your head as you shake your ass, the slit of your dress exposing your soft thigh. His palm tingles at the thought of how good you feel against him. The smooth warmth of your leg against the rough calluses of his fingers.
I love you.
Joel orders a whiskey and then walks towards the edge of the dance floor, his free hand tucked into the pocket of his pants as he watches you. As the song changes your eyes find him and you crook a finger at him, when he shakes his head you stick your bottom lip out and give him big doe eyes. He shakes his head again as Tess hands you the half drank bottle of wine. The pink tone of the wine casts a romantic glow across your exposed chest as you take a small sip. His cock stirs to life in his pants, remembering how those lips felt wrapped around him. He shakes his head at you again and takes a long pull from his drink. You stick your tongue out at him and spin away from him, wiggling your hips while glancing over your shoulder.
I fucking love you.
You spin back towards him and crook your finger at him again, mouthing ‘please?’. He stays rooted to the spot. Joel doesn’t dance, especially not to this kind of music. His heart flutters as you start to walk over to him, everything moves in slow motion, the sexy way your dress clings to your hips with each movement, the flash of your thigh, the slight bounce of your breasts with each step. It feels like hours have passed by the time you stop in front of him.
“Please come dance with me.” You say, fluttering your lashes slightly.
He grabs the expensive bottle of wine from you and places it on the tall table beside him. “This is very expensive wine.”
“That was Tess’s doing,” you smile.
“I’m sure it was, because you’re my good girl, aren’t you?” His hand strokes your cheek and he clocks the goosebumps that rise on your skin.
“Please come dance, Mister Miller?”
“I don’t dance, sweet girl.”
You pout again and he wants to suck that perfect bottom lip between his teeth so badly. “What if you just stand there and I dance around you?”
One day he’s going to have to learn how to say no to you, but today won’t be that day. He takes the last sip from his glass and puts it beside the wine. You bounce excitedly on the balls of your feet as he holds a hand out to you. You lead the way, the dance floor now full of people, heading back towards Tess. Joel’s hands come to your hips as you grind against him for the last few bars of the song.
A slow twang of guitar starts off the next song. Joel spins you to face him. “This I can dance to.” He whispers, pulling you in close, one hand low on your back, the other holding yours to his heart.
You smile up at him, “Full of surprises, aren’t you, sweet cheeks?”
At this angle the brim of his hat blocks out everything except for you; not that he needs something to block out the rest of the world when he’s around you. I love you.
“For the right woman I can be, freckles.” He says warmly as you melt into his body.
The two of you continue to dance in a comfortable silence. He watches your lips as your tongue glides across them and just as he’s about to lean in and taste you you speak. “I don’t think I said this yet tonight, but congratulations. This is a huge accomplishment and I’m so proud of you and grateful that you brought me into this space. I hope it’s not too bold, but this has done exactly as I hoped. I feel - freer almost, if that makes sense.”
“Good,” his lips press to your forehead. “And thank you.”
Your neck cranes forward, towards the tangled mess of your hands against his chest. Your lips pressing to the knuckle of his thumb. The gesture shoots straight to his heart.
“I’ve been feeling a bit bad though. You’ve had to go to two events for me this week.” You go to protest but he cuts you off. “What would you be doing tonight if it wasn’t for this?”
You hum in thought. “Any bar where there’s an open mic night or a local band.”
“That so? Do you participate in the open mic?”
“No, absolutely not, but I enjoy music and watching people do things they’re passionate about.”
He raises an eyebrow at you. “Let’s go then.”
“What?”
“Let’s go. I’ve said thank you to all the VIP’s. Let's go do your thing.”
You
“Can we do that?” You ask, trying not to let the smile that’s pulling at your cheeks win.
Joel laughs quietly. “It’s my party, I can do what I want. They can all stay, but the longer I stay here the more I’m going to be pulled away. And you’re the only person at this party that I want to talk to.”
That’s Joel speaking, not his dom alter ego.
The boulder is growing in your throat again as you croak, “We’re dressed awfully fancy for a local bar.”
Joel smiles down at you, his eyes soft. You start memorizing every detail of his face. Everything surrounding the two of you went fuzzy the second he pulled you into his arms. This man, dressed in all black, blurs the edges of everything around you, sucking you in and making you feel like the only person he sees. The slow country song that you didn’t even hear starts to come to end. “I don’t care. Any more concerns?”
He doesn’t care, he’ll never care, he just wants to be with you. The box of feelings that's grown exponentially over this evening inches its way out of the shadows, and you can’t deny it anymore.
You’re falling in love with Joel Miller.
“Let’s go,” you say, excitement replacing the lump in your throat.
Joel wastes no time, peeling your bodies apart and pulling you towards the exit. He doesn’t look back as Tommy calls his name, only stopping at the front desk to grab your purse. You feel giddy, almost as if the two of you are doing something wrong. He opens the car door for you and then hops into the driver's seat. You pull out your phone, ignoring him as he comments on your cracked screen being a hazard, and check for open mic nights, finding one in a small bar just a few streets over.
The bar is small, about ten tables crammed together and then a few stools along the bartop. The stage is only big enough for one person, a few guitars on stands, a stool, and the mic stand. The lighting is low, different neon signs above the bar doing the majority of the work. You’re way overdressed and the looks you get from the packed bar further prove it.
Joel pulls you through the crowd towards the bar. You were feeling slightly tipsy dancing with Tess, but there is something so sobering about being pulled into Joel's arms. And now that you’ve realized you’re falling in love with him, his next question is very welcome.
“Can I buy you a drink?”
“Yes, please.” You smile sweetly, plastering your front to Joel’s side as he squeezes into the bar. “I’ll just have whatever you’re having.”
“Two old fashioneds,” he says deeply to the bartender. You stifle a giggle, “What?”
“You just give me so much ammunition sometimes.”
He swats at your ass and then squeezes, not caring who may or may not see. It’s exhilarating getting to just be yourselves away from the club and you have a feeling you’ll quickly become addicted to this. “Mighty thin ice, baby.”
The raspy voiced woman with crazy curly hair finishes her set as Joel pays for the drinks. It appears that most of the crowd was here to see her, a few tables free up and the place doesn’t feel so crowded. The MC for the night gets back onto the stage.
“Alright, if anyone else wants to show us what they’ve got tonight I’ll be by the bar.” There’s a few cheers and some clapping as the bar empties out drastically, only about twenty people are left. Joel pulls out a chair for you and then sits beside you.
“Thank you for the drink,” you say, bringing the liquid to your lips and taking a small sip. The warmth of it heats all the way down to your belly, a familiar feeling when you’re around Joel.
“Of course,” he nods, sipping his. “So? Do you come here often?”
You laugh, leaning forward on your arms, noticing the way Joel’s eyes bounce from your face to your breasts; now pushed together for him. “What a line! But no, I have never been here. I kinda like it though.”
The MC’s voice fills the room, welcoming a brave soul to the stage. A tall man in cowboy boots and a shiny buckle joins the stage, carefully picking a guitar from the rack before he begins singing. You can tell by the warmth along the side of your face that Joel is watching you and not the man on the stage.
“He’s pretty good,” you say, looking back towards Joel. It’s almost unfair how he can still look so sexy in the neon glow of the lights above the bar.
“Mediocre,” he says with a scoff and sips his drink.
You glance around, “Ok, well you listen to this mediocre man, I’m going to find the washroom.”
You feel Joel’s eyes on your back as you walk away. The gender neutral bathroom is surprisingly clean and you giggle to yourself at the interaction you had once Joel was no longer looking at you. You try to act natural as you head back to the table, sitting down and smiling at Joel.
His eyebrow arches, “What did you do?”
God you hate how well he knows you. There’s no hiding anything from this man. Regardless, you stifle the fit of giggles that are right on the tip of your tongue, “Nothing! I had to pee. Is that not allowed?”
You raise your glass to your lips, trying to hide the smile as the MC heads back up to the stage. “You did something bad, I can tell.”
“Ladies and gentlemen, we have another performer tonight. Please welcome to the stage Joel Sweet Cheeks Miller.”
Joel shoots a teasing glare at you as you start hollering, “Woo! Sweet cheeks!!” You clap your hands loudly. He lets out a sigh, pushing himself up and then grabbing his drink before heading to the stage.
He steps up, running his fingers over the guitars before choosing a black acoustic. He puts his Old Fashioned on the stool and loops the guitar over his head. Your body reacts in a way you didn’t think it would. Fire erupts on your belly, you take a sip of your drink to try to put it out but the heat of the liquor only makes it worse. He adjusts the knobs on the guitar after hitting the strings a few times and then looks up at you and crooks two fingers, calling you to him. You obey, practically floating to the man you’re falling in love with.
Joel bends at the hip, taking his cowboy hat off and placing it on your head. His voice is a gravel filled whisper as he says, “I’m going to spank that pretty little ass of yours in that washroom you were looking for after this.”
“Yes, Mister Miller.” You rasp.
He stands back up, and clears his throat before starting. “This is, well, this is the largest audience I’ve ever played in front of so, go easy on me.”
His hand pushes back the few curls that have fallen onto this forehead before he strums at the guitar.
If I ever were to lose you I’d surely lose myself
His voice is like stepping into a hot bath, full of warmth and comfort.
Everything I’ve found here I’ve not found by myself
He doesn’t break eye contact with you, only glancing away occasionally when he moves his fingers along the cords.
Try and sometimes you’ll succeed To make this man of me All my stole missing parts I’ve no need for anymore
You stare up at him, lips slightly parted, as everything falls into place.
And I believe And I believe ‘cause I can see Our future days Days of you and me
You could go to Berkeley and do great, probably middle of the pack, but you’d reach your goals. You’d become a lawyer and leave school with a handful of job offers. Or…you could stay. You could stay and be the top of your class here. You could stay and continue being with Joel.
Back when I was feeling broken I focused on a prayer You came deep as any ocean Did something out there hear?
The box of feelings starts to vibrate, making it almost impossible to breathe.
All the complexities and games No one wins, but somehow they still played All the missing crooked hearts They may die, but in us they live on
You’re staying. You’re going to the University of Texas at Austin School of Law.
And I believe And I believe ‘cause I can see Our future days Days of you and me
And just like that, the box of feelings explodes like one of those worms in a can of fake peanuts.
When hurricanes and cyclones raged When winds turned dirt to dust When floods they came, the tides they raise Even closer, became us
This wasn’t part of your plan, but you can’t let this go.
And all the promises at sundown I meant them like the rest
You hear his voice, ‘It’s only you, sweet girl’ and ‘your consent is the most important thing to me.’
All the demons used to come ‘round I’m grateful, now they’ve left.
‘Does it look like I own things that aren’t perfect’, ‘tell me, tell me you’re perfect’.
So persistent in my ways Hey, angel, I’m am here to stay
‘I’m here for you’.
No resistance, no alarms Please, this is just too good to be gone
You’re not falling in love. No, you’re already so madly, deeply, insanely in love with this man that it hurts and feels amazing all at the same time.
And I believe And I believe ‘cause I can see Our future days Days of you and me
You suck in a breath for what feels like the first time since he started singing, your chest practically heaving at the release of emotion you’re experiencing.
You and me It’s just, you and me
You’re not sure if people are clapping, you can’t hear anything over your own voice in your head screaming out ‘I love you’ over and over again. Joel hops off the stage, his eye flashing onyx as he growls, “punishment time, my sweet girl.”
Joel
The way your eyes sparkled as he sang and the way you’re following him now, your warm fingers laced in his as he pulled you gently to the bathroom, almost have him convinced that you feel the same way he does.
He locks the door, then jiggles the handle to make sure it’s secure. He’s shared subs with other men and women, he’s used the rooms for people to watch at the club; fuck, one time he even made one sub kneel completely naked at his feet while he sat at the bar of the club. But someone seeing you, something that is all his, ignites a protectiveness that he’s only ever felt for two other women.
You giggle mischievously as he steps close, plucking his hat off your head and placing it back on his. “What did I say I was going to do to you, baby?”
He watches your bottom lip disappear between your teeth before you say, “You were going to spank me.”
He spins you roughly by your hips, pulling your back flush to his chest before walking you over the pedestal style sink. He watches in the mirror at the tell tale signs of your building arousal. Your cheeks flush, the pink creeping down your neck and exposed chest. He sees the way your eyes glass over, cock drunk before even getting it. Joel loves how easy you are to turn on, loves even more that it’s just for him.
No, I just love her.
He stops, the soft light above the mirror lighting the two of you up in yellow glow. The small bathroom is clean, but dark. White and black checkered floor with white walls; hopefully thick walls, but he has ways to keep you quiet while he punishes you.
His lips come to the exposed side of your neck, hovering just above where he can see your pulse quickening. He hears the hitch of your breath as he inhales your lavender scent. He slips into full dominant mode, keeping his voice a deep growling whisper, “Hands on the edges of the sink, sweet girl.”
You obey him without hesitation, leaning forward and wrapping your hands around the shiny white sink. His eyes lock on yours through the mirror as he fists the soft silk of your skirt. His palms tingle at the thought of getting to feel you soon and his cock jumps at the thought of your heart-shaped ass being pink with his handprints.
As the skirt crawls to be just above your knees he says, “How many should you get for that little stunt?”
He watches the goosebumps that spread across your skin. “Five?” Your voice is sweet and innocent with the ask.
The skirt starts to hike up higher, the long slit could give him easy access, but he’s playing a role right now, and he knows that the anticipation makes it better so much better for his sub. “Not much of a lesson in five. How about ten.”
It’s not a question and he knows you know it. He’d be lying though if he said he didn’t want to see if you’d fight him just a little bit. Brat taming is not his thing; granted neither is spanking a sub he’s fallen in love with in a bathroom of a dingy bar while wearing a six thousand dollar suit.
A shiver runs through your body as he exposes your ass. The lacy black thong sends his thoughts into overdrive. God damn, what I wouldn’t give to fuck this woman, just once.
“Do I have your consent to spank you ten times?”
You nod, “Yes, Mister Miller.”
He takes one of your wrists in his hand and brings it back to hold your skirt up and then repositions himself to be beside you instead of behind you. He takes you in, bent over with your ass exposed, pupils blown out. Your chest rises and falls with shallow, shaky breaths. He’s going to have to keep you quiet.
A hand clamps around your lips and your eyes widen. “If you want me to stop, drop the skirt. Got it?”
You nod into his palm as the first slap fills the room. Your skin is soft and warm under his touch as he makes contact again. By the third strike, his hand around your mouth muffles a squeal. The fourth spank lands on your other cheek and a quiet husky moan rumbles against your lips and his palm.
“You’re supposed to be my sweet girl,” he taunts as another loud slap fills the room. He’s been watching you in the mirror the entire time, enjoying the way you try to keep eye contact; but now, at the halfway mark of your spanking, your eyes are hooded with need. He looks down your ass, grinding his hips into your side at the sight of his bright red handprints tattooed on your cheeks. “Fuck, you look so good all marked up.”
He spanks you again watching the jiggle of your ass and how it ripples down your leg. Your back arches as you whimper quietly. “Atta girl,” he says proudly, smiling to himself. “Three more.”
Joel administers the last three spankings quickly, two on one cheek and one on the other. The sound of his palm on your flesh goes straight to his cock each time, he’s practically rutting into your hip bone to relieve some of the ache. He’s given a lot of spankings in his time as a dom and his body has never reacted this way. I’m so goddamn in love with her, I should keep spanking her for making me feel like that, but if I don’t taste her right now I’m going to go insane.
His hand grabs your skirt while his other drops from your face. Your breaths come in fast, like you just ran a marathon. He guides you to stand and then spins you around, a hiss leaves your lips, “It’s cold,” you whisper, making eye contact with him.
He takes his hat off and places it on your head before kneeling down in front of you.
You
The cool porcelain soothes the delicious burn along your ass, but the burn quickly spreads through your body as the man you’ve realized you’re in love with kneels in front of you. His voice has an edge of desperation as he says, “I need to taste you, please baby.”
What is he doing to me? He has to know what he’s doing to you, right? Did he mean the lyrics of that song or is it just the only song he knows? However, at this moment, you’re just as desperate for him.
“Yes,” you nod frantically as you speak, “Mister Miller. Please.’
His mouth connects with your lace covered cunt. Licking over the thin fabric, teasing you with light but mind numbing pressure. Joel Miller always looks good, tall and broad, tanned skin that crinkles slightly around his eyes when he smiles, but when he’s on his knees in front of you it ignites something low in your belly. His curly dark hair is soft to the touch and you bring your hand to his scalp now. He groans at the feeling of your hands on him and continues to lick at your clit through your panties.
The black cowboy hat falls over your eyes, your other hand raises to hold it out of the way. Even with the decision to stay here for law school, you don’t want to miss a second of the salacious acts playing out right in front of you.
“Oh god, Mister Miller,” you whisper, trying to stay as quiet as possible.
He moves to kiss at your thigh, hooking a finger around the gusset of your soaked lace. “This fucking garter, sweet girl. Been drivin’ me crazy all night,” he growls between kisses.
He pulls your panties to the side and your nipples harden under your dress as the cool air hits your throbbing pussy. “Fuck,” he practically whimpers. “You smell so good. Taste so good, too.”
His mouth latches around your clit, sucking it between his lips and everything goes fuzzy as the burn in your lower belly starts to spread. “Ohgodohgood, f-fuck.”
The tip of his tongue flicks against your swollen aching clit with each suck and you start to panic over how you’re going to keep quiet while you come. One of his fingers that pulls your thong out of the way teases at your entrance, gathering your arousal, before he pushes it inside of you to the first knuckle. He looks up at you, eyes flushed onyx as he swallows down everything you give him.
“Mister Miller,” you hum as he pushes his forefinger the rest of the way in. When he curls it forward you release the grip on his salt and pepper curls and clamp your hand around your mouth.
He pulls away, a dimple carving out his cheek as he smirks. “Feels that good?” He flicks gently at your clit and you moan in agreement into your hand. “Good fuckin’ girl.”
Joel sucks your clit back into his mouth, pumping his thick finger against the spongy spot that makes you melt and the heat bursts into tingling pleasure as your orgasm washes over you. Your eyes roll into the back of your head as you fight to keep quiet, grinding your hips unabashedly against Joel’s face. He’s relentless with his ministrations and you bite at your palm as another wave rolls through you.
The spasms of your pussy around his finger slow and you’re finally composed enough to drop your hand, grabbing his shoulder as your knees threaten to give out. Joel slips his finger out from you, placing light, lingering kisses on your mound before standing. His hands find your hips, holding you steady.
“Kiss me,” you slur, feeling drunk off the pleasure.
Your arms loop around his neck as he kisses you. His lips taste like you and you lick at the heady sweetness. You slant your head, kissing him deeper. His body goes soft, relaxing into the kiss. You could do this with him forever, and for once it’s not the box of feelings saying that. The contents of that box have coated your entire brain with the love it housed for the man you’re not even supposed to know exists. The two of you break apart, both panting for air. You break the silence first.
“Take me to the club.”
“We can’t go back there. I’ll just get sucked back into the crowd.” His nose runs up and down yours, dark chocolate brown eyes never leaving yours.
“I need more, Mister Miller. Please, take me.”
“Shit,” he huffs. “Come with me.”
Joel
This is so incredibly stupid, he thinks as he pulls into his neighborhood. The moment the two of you got back into his car you leaned over onto his shoulder and closed your eyes. He should take you to your apartment. You must be exhausted from all the studying and working you’ve been doing. Plus, he kept you out late for two nights. He pulls up onto his driveway, and the slight bump from the curb causes you to stir. He parks in the driveway and watches as you blink and register where you are.
“I can take you home if you want.”
“No, I want to be with you.” Your eyes widen and you start to do that thing where you ramble, only to dig yourself deeper.
Joel chuckles and then leans forward, pressing your lips to your forehead to stop you. “I knew what you meant, baby girl.”
He gets out of the car and then comes around to open your door. When you left the bar tonight you tried to open your door, again, and he scolded you gently. He smiles to himself that you’ve listened finally, that or you’re just too tired and he should really be taking you home. But when he helps you out of the car and meets your gaze again you look anything but tired. Need and arousal flood his system as he takes you in, lips slightly parted and eyes dancing around his face. Your words from the bathroom ring in his ears. I need more, Mister Miller.
He snaps, lips slamming against yours, your hands immediately finding the curls at the nape of his neck; the only hair you can reach because of the cowboy hat still proudly perched on top of his head. He lifts you, moaning at the feeling of your toned thighs wrapping around his waist. He moves on instinct, closing the car door and walking into the house while the two of you fervently kiss in a mix of tongue and teeth. You nip at his bottom lip as he walks into the marble foyer. He closes the garage entry door and presses you against it, sucking your bottom lip into his mouth, His cock is painfully hard behind his pants.
“I need you,” you whine after your lip is free from his mouth.
“What do you need?”
You kiss at his neck, hands moving to loosen his tie. “I need you to fuck me, please, Mister Miller.”
I love you.
He keeps you pinned to the door, his one hand grabbing yours and pinning them above your head. How many times is he going to have you in the position, fighting against what you’re begging for? Hopefully, it never stops.
“My sweet girl, you know I can’t do that.” It physically hurts him to turn you down.
You pout at him before speaking, “Then just be naked with me, I need to feel your skin on mine. Please?”
He kisses you again and starts to move the two of you towards the stairs. Between kisses, he says, “What happened to that shy girl who couldn’t even tell me she wanted me to dominate her?”
You laugh against his lips, “She’s been corrupted.”
“I’m a bad man,” he hums with a laugh and walks up the stairs with you plastered to his chest; one hand around the globes of your ass, the other tucking your head into his neck so he can see where he’s stepping. The moment you reach the top of the stairs he pulls your face back to his to kiss you again.
“This is where it happened,” you say, as he passes the office.
“Where what happened?” He says, pulling back to look at you, his eyebrows draw in in confusion and the black Stetson he forgot he was wearing falls forward slightly. You take the hat off his head, looking at him all wide-eyed and amused.
“The corruption,” you say with a wink. Joel snorts in response and then his lips are back on yours. He has missed having this mix of passion and humour with someone.
When he passes over the threshold of his bedroom he places you on your feet. He told himself he wouldn’t ever have you here. No, not told, promised, because he knew what having here would mean. But you made him fall in love with you anyway. The air in the bedroom feels thicker, and his breathing quickens as he looks at you. The only light that trickles in is from the hallway. He takes in your sparkling eyes, your lips, puffy from his kisses and light nips; the perfect curls of your hair are slightly dishevelled and truthfully - he has never found you more beautiful.
I love you.
You
Butterflies assault your stomach as you stare at Joel. He takes the hat from you and tosses it gently on the foot of the bed behind you. The room is deafeningly silent, only the sounds of both of your quickened breathing and thundering heartbeats fill the void. You stand frozen, the heels of your strappy black sandals sinking into the plush carpet of his bedroom. You remember when you carried his sheets to the washing machine just a few weeks ago, being surrounded by the delicious scents of ash and leather. You had no idea who Joel was then, the man in this house was just a fantasy in your mind. You wait for him to make the first move. Finally, his thick fingers find the zipper along your side.
“Are you sure about this?” He says, his voice is hoarse, and you can tell he’s nervous. You wish knowing that would calm you, but truthfully it just makes your heart burst even more. This morning, the thought of anyone, but especially Joel, having feelings for you was ridiculous, but now you aren’t so sure it’s that absurd after all.
“Yes, Mister Miller. I just - I need…” he watches you patiently. Playing with the small metal zipper pull.
“Don’t be shy, sweet girl. Just tell me what you need.”
“I need to feel your skin against mine. Please.”
He pulls at the zipper as his lips meet your neck. “I love when you ask so politely. My good girl, aren’t you?”
“Mm-hmm,” you hum, fighting the sway of your legs to stay upright.
If he’s calling you yours, that’s Joel speaking. Not his dom alter ego.
Joel’s fingers come to the thin straps along your shoulders. The warmth of his hands against your skin causes you to shiver. He drags the straps down your arms and then frowns at the tape holding the dress to your chest. He tugs gently and you gasp at the pull of the tape. Before you can protest, the sting is soothed by his lips, kissing the sore, pink skin. He does the same thing after tugging the other side and the silky black dress pools at your feet.
You watch the muscles of Joel’s throat flex as he swallows, eyes trailing down your body. “Turn around.”
You spin on the balls of your feet, careful to not catch your heels on the carpet. “So you need to feel me, is that right, sweet girl?”
You nod your head. “Yes, Mister Miller.”
One of his hands comes to gently rest on your shoulder and instinctively lean into his touch. His fingers whirl around as he traces down your shoulder blade and then back up to your neck. “I can’t believe how beautiful you looked tonight. I kept getting pulled away from you every time I tried to get back to you. It was killing me to be away from you.”
You let your eyes close as his fingers run down your spinal column. You feel his heat leave your back and then his lips sponge kisses along the globes of your ass, his hands holding your hips possessively.
“You were such a good girl tonight. Outside of the little singing stunt,” he says between kisses. Every spot that took the punishment of his palm is given attention. “But you paid for that, didn’t you sweet girl?”
You giggle quietly before saying. “Yes, Mister Miller. Thank you, but I can’t promise I won’t do it again.”
“Good,” he laughs, standing up behind you. You hear the unmistakable sound of his silk tie being pulled off. “Because I don’t want you to ever stop teasing me.”
He tosses the tie towards his dresser. Before you know it, he’s spun you around and lifted you into his arms again. Your body knows just what to do, your legs clamping around his waist on their own. He captures the squeak that leaves your lips with his mouth. Nothing makes you melt faster than the feel of Joel’s lips on yours. They’re soft but firm, his tongue warm against yours as he takes what he wants from you and there’s no way you’re not going to let him.
He sits you on the dresser and plants his hands on each side of you as your hands move to work the buttons on his shirt. His lips never leave yours.
“I need you,” you whine as you get the first few buttons undone. The heat of his chest skimming against your fingertips has a fresh wave of arousal coat your already soaked pussy.
Joel moans needily at your confession as he pulls back slightly. He rips at his shirt, buttons burst before he tears it off and stands shirtless in front of you. Your eyes trail down his strong broad chest, stopping on the prominent bulge behind his pants. Your hands fly to his belt. He watches you with rapt fascination as you work the buckle and then the button of his pants.
As you move to the zipper, his fingers go to the lace of your panties. He growls as he splits the fabric.
“Joel!” You gasp. “Those were thirty dollars!”
He grabs your leg, placing the ball of your foot on his chest,unbuckling your shoe. “I just ruined an $800 dress shirt. I’ll buy you more.”
The shoe hits the floor and he grabs your other foot, his eyes locking to yours as he commands, “And it’s Mister Miller. I’ve been lenient with you. Another mistake and you will be punished - severely.”
For such harsh words, he’s being so careful with the small golden buckle on your shoe. “Yes, Mister Miller,” you say sweetly, batting your lashes innocently.
“Feet up on the dresser. Spread your legs for me, sweet girl.”
You lean back slightly, hands being used as an anchor behind you, placing your heels on the edge of the dresser. Cool air hits your drenched cunt and you fight yet another shiver. You’re spread wide for Joel, every single thing on display for him. He looks at you like you hung the moon and your heart flips behind your ribs. You suddenly feel like you did the first time the two of you spoke in his kitchen, his gaze is too much, too intense, and it becomes nearly impossible for you to not yell out that you love him, so you look away, your eyes falling to his strong chest.
“Eyes up here,” he murmurs as he takes the smallest step back.
Your mouth goes dry as you look back up at him. In your peripheral you can see his hands going to his belt, the sound of the buckle jingling tempts you to look down. “Atta girl, stay right here with me.”
You stay in his warm coffee brown pools, flecks of gold and honey appearing as the soft light of his bedroom hits him. I love you.
He bends slightly, his pants and boxers falling to the ground. You try to swallow once, twice, never leaving his gaze as the rest of his clothing comes off. You swear that time stops, the two of you are suspended in a moment that’s all yours. He steps forward and you can feel the heat of his skin against your entire body, you melt into his warmth.
“You want to look, don’t you?” he taunts.
“Yes, Mister Miller,” you hum.
The soft tip of his cock gently nudges at your clit and you gasp. “Look down, baby.”
You peel your eyes away from his, looking down to see where his body caresses against yours. The tip of his impossibly hard cock, precum glistening as it leaks for you, pressing lightly to your soft and swollen clit. His piercing lays flat against his pelvis and you remember what he said about there being benefits to it. You try to memorize the sight in front of you. As filthy and debauched as this is, it’s also passionate and beautiful; it's the epitome of Mister Miller and your time with him.
“Fuck, sweet girl. Your pussy is so pretty…and soft.” You watch as he wraps his hand around the thick base of his cock and rocks his hips. His cock slides easily along the warm folds of your drenched cunt, you swear you can feel the ridge of the underside of the tip as he says, “Who has you this turned on? Huh, sweet girl?”
“You,” you whimper as your legs start to tremble.
“God damn,” his voice now matching yours, “How’d I get so lucky.”
This time you know he’s not asking you a question, yet you hum in agreement as his cock slides back over your clit, the swollen nub relishing in the friction and the feel of him against you. You hope he’s going to keep going, you want to feel him inside of you more than you need oxygen. Instead, his other hand slips between the two of you, his strong digits teasing at your entrance. He slides along your clit again as one of his fingers pushes inside of you.
“Is this ok?” He whispers.
“Yesyes - fuuuuck, Mister Miller.” A bead of pre cum lands on your mound at the sound of pleasure passing your lips.
“Such a good girl for me. Already learning how to take me so well.” His finger slips out as a second joins it. “She’s begging for it, tryin’ to suck me in. So tight, my gorgeous sweet girl.”
Your foreheads meet and it all becomes too much again. You close your eyes as his fingers finally fill you. “Don’t stop,” you whine desperately.
His hips pick up their pace, pressing harder along your most sensitive spots. You get that floating feeling again. He’s so close to exactly how you need him, how you want him. The voice from your now-exploded box of feelings adds, “For the rest of your life”.
You keep your eyes closed, sparks of pleasure occasionally flickering behind them. You’re getting closer to your high with every press of his body against yours. You know if you opened your eyes you’d be able to fall over the edge, but you aren’t ready to be done imagining how it would look if his cock was doing what his fingers were right now.
“I can feel you’re getting close, baby. Clenchin’ my fingers so hard.” His voice is full of admiration, not a tone you’re used to hearing in moments like this. You used to think that you had a first love, and while none of your exes ever mistreated you, they also didn’t look at you or speak to you the way Joel Miller does.
His pace increases again as he curls his fingers forward, your body jolts up with the newly applied pressure behind your clit. You grip his shoulders to ground yourself, the inside of your thighs start to ache, but you’re not going to let your feet fall from the dresser. Truthfully, the burning ache only seems to intensify the pleasure at the apex of your thighs.
“Open your eyes, watch how good your pussy looks against me.”
“I ca-can’t. ‘M so close. I don’t - oh fuck - don’t wanna be done.”
“Just because you come, it doesn’t mean we are done, sweet girl. I’m not ready to be done. I want you to come as many times as you need to.” He presses his cock down against your clit harder as he speaks.
Before you can even take your next breath your orgasm washes over you. It hits hard and for a second you think your throat is constricted, but just as the wall of your pussy relaxes and begins to flutter, a euphoric scream frees itself from your airway. You start to pant, your body falling back to rest on the wall behind you. Joel falls forward with you, and just when you think you’re about to come down from your high, the pressure at this angle sends the strongest wave of your orgasm through you and you begin to gush around his fingers.
“That’s my good fuckin’ girl. Soak me.” Pride swells in his eyes as you chant his dominant name like a prayer. Your breathing starts to even and he slows his fingers and hips, ensuring not to send you into any overstimulation. I’m not ready to be done yet. He slowly removes his fingers, then wraps his arm around you to pull you up. Your feet fall from the dresser and the relief your muscles feel causes you to let out a pleasurable sigh.
Joel
He needs more, so much more, but waits for you - taking a few slow breaths in time with yours. When he sees you coming back down to earth he slides the tip of his cock up and down. At this angle, there’s no risk of accidentally slipping so he runs himself along every part he can reach.
“Kiss me,” you mumble, bringing your face towards his. He captures your lips in a sweet kiss, a kiss he’s sure you can tell isn’t the way a dom kisses his sub. He realizes at that moment that he’s never kissed you that way. No, he’s always kissed you with everything he had, giving himself to you piece by piece.
More. His inner voice growls. I’ll never come back up for air now.
Joel whispers your name between kisses and you both pull back just enough to see each other's faces. “When we got here, you said you wanted me to fuck you. Do you still want that?”
He watches your eyes dance around him. Confusion, fear, excitement and arousal line yours before you pull back from him. He scolds himself for saying it. Of course you’re going to panic, this is supposed to be a safe space. He set a complete ban on sex before he even met with you the first time. It’s right there, in his dom profile; because that’s what he is, he’s your dom. You can come here and beg for it, because you know it’s a safe place where it won’t happen.
He prepares himself for you to slap him or yell at him. Instead, you say, “Mister Miller, I don’t want you to do anything that you don’t want to. This was a hard limit for you, and where I very much want to, I don’t want you to break any promise to yourself.”
He let his eyelids fall shut, for the first time, he doesn’t want to be Mister Miller. He wants to be Joel.
I love you.
Goosebumps break out along his skin as you drag your hands up to his neck, fingers scraping along the back of his scalp. “Talk to me.”
“Just call me Joel,” he says through the boulder that’s lodged in his throat.
He feels your warm lips meet his cheek, kissing him softly before you clear your throat quietly and then whisper into his ear. “Please fuck me, Joel. Fuck me or I might die or go insane.”
“Again,” he growls.
“Fuck me, Joel.” You say, louder and with more conviction than the last time.
He scoops you off the dresser, your soft naked thighs tightening around his waist and he steals your squeal with his lips, kissing you hard with hurried passion. He’ll worry tomorrow about what getting you to call him Joel means, all he knows at this moment is that he needs to hear that you need him just as much as he needs you.
He lays you on the bed, pressing down into your warmth. He can feel how wet you are as you grind up into him. His lips grow hungrier, kissing every bit of your face and neck he can reach, relishing in the feel of your hands running up and down his biceps, your short nails scraping his skin occasionally.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” He asks before fusing his lips to your neck.
Your feet fall to the bed and you arch into him. “Yes, Joel.”
He raises to his knees, unclipping the chains around your body and then working with you to slip your ruined panties off. He reaches over to the bedside table to get a condom, using his teeth to peel the foil open and sliding it on. You’re always completely at his mercy, but this time he’s wholly at yours. One of his hands grips your hip, the other wraps around his cock as he takes in all your soft smooth skin, and memorizes the constellations that your freckles make along your body. Your breasts heave with each shallow inhale and shake beautifully with each exhale. Finally, his gaze meets yours, your eyes filled with every emotion he’s feeling.
“There’s no safeword anymore, my sweet girl. If you tell me to stop, I will.”
You nod as he lines himself up, the warmth of your tight entrance calling to him. Joel pushes gently, your hips rising to encourage him. His balls tighten at the feeling of you wrapped tightly around the tip.
“So tight, sweet girl.” He falls forward, both forearms beside your head to keep his weight off of you.
The two of you rock in tandem, working more of him into you. “Oh god, Joel. More,” you moan.
There was a time when he told you to only call him Joel, it was the only name you could use that would keep this side of him from taking over. But now, hearing your voice say his name in the needy little vibrato, it’s having the same effect as when you call him Mister Miller. He’s sure you know exactly how he feels, and he’s now certain that you feel the same way.
Your hips grind into his and pleasure spikes through his entire body. He’s fully seated inside of you now, your tight pussy squeezing him sweetly. He buries his face into your neck, lavender hypnotizing him. Everything he can see, hear, smell and feel is you. His sweet girl.
“More, please, more.” You whine, circling your hips.
His jaw flexes as he fights his body’s instinct to come. He pushes down with his hips to still you. “I need a minute, sweet girl. Shit - you feel too good.”
Your soft giggle at his confession causes your pussy to flex tighter around him. A shiver runs up his spine, “Baby, please don’t. Just stay still, please.”
He pulls himself away from your neck, his hips flexing forward. He watches your eyes widen as his piercing presses right where it’s meant to. You gasp and clench his hips with your thighs. He smirks, now flooded with desire and determination to fuck you until neither of you can walk.
“Ready?” He says, his voice deep.
“I think - Joel, fuck - I might…”
His animalistic side kicks in, he pulls out to the tip and then slams back in, swivelling his hips so his piercing stimulates your clit, which he’s sure still must be sensitive from earlier, before pulling back and repeating.
“Think you might what?” He demands, keeping his gaze locked on yours as he fucks you.
“I’m gonna - gonna come.” You moan between thrusts.
“So fuckin’ needy. Aren’t you?” You met each of his thrusts with a flick of your hips. Even with the condom, you feel better than he could have ever imagined. All the things he wants to do to you run through his mind; he wants to take you from behind, or watch your tits bounce as you ride him, he pictures you strapped to the spanking bench in his room at the club. But right now he just wants to worship every inch of you. He wants to show you how you should be treated and loved.
The words are on the tip of his tongue. I love you.
He shifts his weight, one arm hooking under your leg so he can take you deeper. “Sweet girl, I want to feel you come on my cock.”
“Fuckfuck don’t stop.” He peppers your jawline with kisses.
“Kiss me,” he whispers. He tilts his head, parting his lips for your warm tongue. Joel starts fucking you faster. He breaks the kiss, “Come for me, baby girl.”
“Are we going to be done if I do?” You ask.
“No, baby.” He huffed a laugh, his hand pushing the hair away that’s started to stick to your forehead. “Never. I’m never going to be done with you.”
“Joel - oh my god.” He feels you getting tighter and tries to distract his thoughts. He’s not ready to be done, but he’s not young anymore so he can’t risk finishing quite yet. “Your - your piercing.”
“Let go,” he says into your lips. He feels it then, that infinitesimal tightening of your pussy around his length before it begins to flutter. Your whine fills his head. He watches the pleasure fill your face, he swears he can see the clouds that form around your vision as you look deep into his eyes and succumb to your high. Your soft body quivers beautifully underneath him, “That’s my girl.”
The primal need to fuck you hard into his mattress simmers his skin. Not yet, not this time. She’s too perfect right now.
“Tell me how it feels, sweet girl.”
Between pants you moan out, “So good, Joel.”
Your body begins to slow beneath him as your orgasm crests and he gives himself a mental pep talk to hold on just a bit longer. His cock is achy with the need to come, and it’s going to be slightly tortuous to stop, but he wants to take you at least one more time before you both fall into what is sure to be an exhausted sleep.
His lips come to your shoulder. “I love fucking you. Your pussy was made for me.”
Your nails scrape at his back. “It’s t-too much. Fuck. Sorry…sorry.”
Joel stills his hips, releasing your leg and pushing his weight off of you, but doesn’t pull away. Your eyes are clenched tight, “Look at me, sweet girl.”
Your eyes pop open, pupils blown in pleasure and love. There’s no denying it now, he knows you feel the same. “Don’t be sorry.”
Your cheeks flush slightly, “But you’re not, you didn’t yet.”
“If you can’t say it, you shouldn’t be doing it.”
“You didn’t get to come yet,” you whisper.
“I don’t want to yet. I’m going to let you catch your breath and then you’re going to climb onto my lap and really learn what that piercing can do.” He winks and then gives you a small smile before slipping out of you. He rolls onto the mattress beside you, removing the condom and dropping it into the waste bin beside the bed.
He hears you hiss, panic clogs his throat as he whips back towards you. “What’s wrong?”
You nod towards his almost impossibly hard cock. “That looks painful.”
“I’m ok, sweet girl.” He pulls you in, melting at the way your body molds so perfectly to his. He kisses your forehead, “You’re incredible.”
“You too.” You nuzzle deeper into him, your warm breath hitting his chest and your leg wrapping around his.
There’s a few minutes of comfortable silence before you speak, “Hey Joel?”
“Mm-hmm?”
“I think we should ditch the condom.” He pulls back as you look up at him, “You have a vasectomy. I have an IUD. We had recent test results as per the club's rules.”
Joel swallows. Not wearing a condom, even though he had his vasectomy over a decade ago, has never been an option. Another rule of JMKink is that you have to be wearing a condom during all penetrative activities; even if the person you’re fucking is your husband or wife. It hits Joel then that the only person he’s felt that intimately before is Tiffany.
“Are you sure? I know the chances of getting pregnant are very slim, but you got into law school today, I don’t want to risk anything.”
“I’m sure,” you hum. “I’m also sure that you should put that cowboy hat back on for the next round.”
Next Chapter
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Hi! I hope you’re having a wonderful day or night.
I saw your asks are open and I had an idea. What if it’s a protective Alastor x Reader who is the daughter of a protective Lucifer? Maybe she kept in contact with her dad so they are closer and she is older than Charlie. When Lucifer comes to visit the hotel him and Alastor cause some drama
Thanks!
W.P💚
I hope this is what you were looking for? I am very new to doing things like this!
Daddy's Girl
Pairing: Alastor X Lucifer's Daughter! Reader
Tags: Sisterly love, some sexual connotations, spoilers, some angst maybe? idk, swearing, Mimzy.
SPOILERS FOR "DAD BEAT DAD"
Word Count: 1,775
The hotel was eerily quiet when you awoke, so you made your way downstairs to see if anyone was awake. All you could hear as you made your way down the stairs was your quiet footfalls and weird murmuring. As you turned towards the sitting area, you realized the muttering was coming from your younger sister, Charlie.
Charlie was pacing back and forth in front of a pin board covered in colorful papers, and strings. She tugged at her hair, her muttering growing more frantic. As you took in the scene, you realized there were a few people standing and watching her. Niffty was bouncing on the couch, her face full of a strange glee. Husk and Sir Pentious were watching with mixes of bafflement and curiosity.
“Hey, Char Char? Are you ok?” You asked, walking around the couch to get a better view. You saw Angel and Vaggie approach from your peripherals as Charlie whipped around frantically.
“Nope! No. Not really! Haha. Hah…” Her false smile falls as she rips a page off the board. “I have been up all night trying to figure out why the hotel isn’t working! We’ve done every single trust exercise and arts and crafts project I could find! We’ve talked about our feelings and… nothing is working!”
You frown. You knew that things taking so long would eventually get to her, but it was sad to see just how severely. She needed more help.
You walk up to your sister, and set your hands on her shoulders. “I think…”
Her expression collapses. “Please don’t say it.”
“We should call dad. And ask for his help.”
She winces. She clearly doesn’t want your dad’s help. You can’t exactly blame her, either. The two of you were raised a little separate, and it had affected her relationship with Lucifer pretty badly. Although, you were older, and it had afforded you time with Lucifer before Lilith had started to separate herself from him. Charlie had only had a handful of years before their relationship went south. It showed in her anxiety with him, and Lucifer’s inability to talk to Charlie openly. It made you sad, but you weren’t sure how to fix that rift.
“He’s the reason the extermination happens to begin with! He just let it happen! He doesn’t even like sinners! Why would he help me?” Charlie hugs herself, looking off to the side. “He’s always preferred you anyway.”
You hear some audible winces from the audience by the couch, but you ignore them. You pull her into a tight hug, her taller frame putting you at her collarbones. “You know I would change that if I could, honey.” You squeeze her tightly and say, “We can at least see if he can get you a meeting. Anything to give you the advantage, Char Char.”
She sighs, and hugs you back. “Yeah. I guess we can at least try.”
You pull back. “I think you should call him. I bet he’s dying to hear from you, even though he sucks at showing it.”
Charlie rubs her arm and nods. “Alright. I’ll do it!”
As she struggles to start the phone call, Husk makes comments about her having ‘Daddy Issues’, and you blanch. How rude! (Even if it was true). The others make comments about meeting Lucifer, but you and Vaggie just keep your eyes on Charlie. She seems so nervous, and it makes your stomach twist in knots.
She finally calls. It rings three times before a faint, “Heyyyy bitch!” rings out on the other end of the line. You facepalm. Good going Dad.
When all is said and done, Lucifer announces he is visiting within the hour, after much cajoling and guilt-tripping on Charlie’s part. Although, from what you could hear, he seemed excited.
Charlie is excited, and so is everyone else in the hotel. You cheer for her, and then the realization hits you.
Alastor. Fuck.
As the final touches are finished, you sidle up to Alastor with a small grin.
“Please, please don’t start shit. Charlie needs this to work. And I need this to work for Charlie,” you murmur to him.
He barely glances at you. “Worry not, sweetheart! You know I would never do anything to risk the reputation of the hotel! Charlie will get the help she needs!” His arm wraps around your shoulders, and he squeezes you into his side. For just a moment, his head ducks down, and he whispers into your ear. “Just need to make it clear whose little girl you are now.” Then he perks right back up like nothing happened.
Your face burns hot. How dare he! But you don’t get to do anything in retaliation, because Charlie is opening the door.
“Chaaaaarlie!” Lucifer exclaims, immediately pulling her into a tight embrace. Your sister’s face is full of shock, and you just want to laugh. Ha! You were right! He continues talking to her in the slightest baby voice, and you can’t help but let some giggles escape you. Your dad could be just so silly! “Oh, it’s so good to see you!”
He lets go of Charlie as she welcomes him to the hotel. He spots Keekee first, and pets her. Then greets Razzle and Dazzle. You watch from the sidelines with a small smile. It was nice seeing your dad outside the home. He had been holing himself up for so long… You look up at Alastor, who hasn’t moved an inch since your dad came in.
You elbow him gently. “You okay?”
Alasotr’s expression is tight. His eyes flicker to you for a moment, before landing back on your father. He merely hums in response, making you frown. How odd… You knew the two wouldn’t get along, but for Alastor to dislike him already?
Then your dad spots the bar. “Oh! What in the unholy Hell is that?”
Alastor immediately shadow-walks to the other side of the room, and you know it’s time to intervene.
“Oh! Just some of the renovations we’ve made.” Alastor gestures with his mic, before continuing. “Adds a bit of color, don’t you think?”
You wince, and make your way to Alastor’s side.
“Hey, Dad,” you say, trying to prevent your dad making any further comments on the decor. That's a good way to piss off Alastor.
“Sweetheart!” Your dad runs up to you, and tries picking you up. You laugh at the tights squeeze. “How’s my girl?” His hands squish your cheeks, making it hard to respond.
You giggle through the ministrations, and finally push his hands back so you can respond. “I’m doing great, Dad. Figured I should introduce you to Alastor here.” You gesture to Alastor, who looks the closest to not smiling that you have ever seen. It makes your stomach feel like lead, as you keep talking. “He’s our facilities' manager, and my…”
Your voice trails off, and you look at Alastor, as if hoping he has the word you are looking for.
“I’m her lover!” Alastor exclaims, quite loudly. His static drops for a moment and then bursts back up in volume, making you wince. Great. He just announced that to everyone in the room. The ‘everyone’ being everyone who didn’t know. You can hear Charlie ‘whoop!’ in the background, and several variations of ‘what the fuck’. “She’s quite the darling. I just couldn’t resist this sweet face!” Alastor grabs at your cheeks, similar to how your dad did, and squishes them. “See?”
You risk a glance at your dad. He looks ready to kill. Fuck. This is absolutely not how you wanted to tell your dad. He nearly killed the last partner you had for ghosting you. You can see your dad’s horns growing, and you push Alastor back.
“Haha! Yeah. Uh. Sorry. I would have told you before now, but we’re kind of new! We were trying to keep it on the down-low for now but…” You glare at Alastor, but he just has this shit-eating grin on his face, and you know he doesn’t care.
“Right.” Your dad continues glaring at Alastor. You wince, and decide to go over by the snack table. Angel is just giving you this look, and you know he will be asking about Alastor’s dick, which you have not seen, later. Husk seems disappointed in you, and you absolutely know why. You just give him an apologetic shrug, and watch as Alastor and your dad seem to start a pissing match.
It ends with Alastor in his face saying, “Fuck you,” and your knees nearly give out. Holy shit.
Charlie finally intervenes, and Lucifer, after some more glaring at Alastor, get her to introduce him to the rest of the residents.
Alastor lays a hand on your shoulder as your dad greets both the guests and the staff. You can feel his thumb rubbing back and forth, and it sends shivers down your spine. You look up at Alastor, but his gaze is still locked on your dad. Annoyed, you roll your eyes with a huff, and look back to the meet-and-greet. Your dad is looking back at you, his frown deep, and a barely audible growl making its way to your ears. Your dad is fucking growling at Alastor. What the Hell?
A rumble builds up in Alastor’s chest, and you can feel it against your back. This one sets heat back up to your face. Gosh, this man needed to get his shit together. No need to start stuff with your dad! Alastor’s hand tightens on your shoulder, before he lets go and stalks back towards Charlie, who is trying to convince your dad to help her.
And then they’re singing. Because of course. Alastor joins in, saying some things that seem to really piss off your dad, but you can't hear much over the blood rushing in your ears. Sometimes these two could be so embarrassing. When your dad pulls out the golden fiddle, you nearly die laughing. (He still wasn’t over losing that one time!) Everything comes to a head, with the two men yelling insults in each other's faces, when suddenly-
“It’s ME!” A woman barges in through the lobby doors, yelling and calling herself Mimzy. She’s blonde, and dressed like a flapper. Alastor seems to recognize her, so you don’t worry.
Later that night, when your dad has finally agreed to help your sister get that meeting, you all settle onto the couches, making a game plan. Alastor sits beside you, one foot resting on the other knee. You lean over and ask softly, “What did you say during that song, anyway?”
Alastor’s grin sharpens, and he presses his lips near your ear, again. “Charlie calls me dad, and your eldest calls me Daddy.”
If you nearly choke on your own spit, you refuse to admit it.
#alastor x reader#alastor fanfiction#fanfic#hazbin hotel fanfiction#hazbin alastor#hazbin hotel#bun's short fics
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𝔱𝔯𝔬𝔲𝔟𝔩𝔢 𝔣𝔬𝔯 𝔪𝔢 ⭒✮⭒
yeah, you’re trouble for me…
a/n: his onigashima outfit…that’s all i have to say!
˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
─── ⋆⋅ ♰ ⋅⋆ ───
18+ !! MINORS DNI
─── ⋆⋅ ♰ ⋅⋆ ───
cw: enemies to lovers, p in v sex, degradation, rough sex, creampie, kidd is a certified perv lol, reader manages a bikini bar;), no set arc - no spoilers, porn WITH plot, pet names: pretty girl, babe
tags ✮⋆˙ eustasskidd x bartender!reader, enemies to lovers, f!/afab!reader, smut
now playing: trouble for me - britney spears
————
“Another round of booze, and make it five glasses!”
“Uh, sir-”
“I SAID GET ME FIVE MORE”
He laughed as he watched the timid bartender run to the back with a horrid expression painted on their face.
“What’s with all the commotion?”
He looked up to see you, the manager of the bar, with an irritated look on your face. His demeanor changed as he was an awestruck at your attractiveness. A green halter bikini top with a black sarong that barely covered the skimpy bottom that rode up your ass. You had your hand on your hip as you waited for the chaotic red-head’s answer.
He finally snapped back to reality before shooting a flirtatious smirk, “Well, hello there beautiful~”
“I’m sorry what-”
“Name’s Kidd….Eustass ‘Captain’ Kidd,” he leaned on the edge of the bar table, his bar stool squeaking in the process.
“Um, ok.”
“So uhhh, nice bikini. Dark green suits ya,” his smirk widening before giving you a flirtatious wink.
“Thanks…it’s a bikini bar?”
He continued on with his failing flirting, “How ‘bout you join my crew, baby girl, cause you gotta nice punk style to ya.”
You felt your eye twitch, “I’m fine with my job, thank you very much.”
“…So, you got some nice curves-”
You gasped at his pervy comment before furiously slapping his face. How can such a man be this confident? While he’s not wrong, you know how to model a cute bikini, you just couldn’t believe the idiocy and confidence of the red-headed pirate.
He rubbed the part where you impacted his face, “OW, HEY!”
“Is that how you talk to women?!”
Before you could say anything else, a man with blonde hair and a mask lightly tapped your shoulder, “Apologies, miss, my captain is very stupid.”
“IM NOT STUPID-”
“He’s not used to making convo with pretty women like you so you have to excuse his poor manners.”
You felt your cheeks become warm hearing the compliment from the masked blonde, “Well, I guess you’re right...”
He laughed, “You see, Eustass? That’s how you talk to ladies. Now go apologize to her!”
The red-headed pirate poured, “ARGH, ok fine!”
————
After composing himself he nervously itched the back of his head, a flustered face to go alongwith his timidness, “Sorry, pretty girl. I didn’t mean to be a pervert…I think you’re very beautiful.”
You felt a bit relieved hearing his words, but that still doesn’t make up for the nuisance he’s been for your bartenders and customers. You let out a hiss through your teeth as you crossed your arms, “I guess I’ll forgive you…But i’m gonna have to refuse you service because you’re over-doing it with the booze!”
“AW COME O-”
The masked blonde coughed a lil ‘ahem.’
“I mean, I appreciate the thought of you looking after my wellbeing…” he grumbled.
The masked man patted his shoulder, whispering in the red-head’s ear, “Don’t mess this up…” You watched as the massacre soldier exited through the swinging doors.
“Anyways, can you hurry up already? I already dismissed all the other girls and I’m ready to close up shop,” you took a drag of your cigarette.
He grumbled at your snarky comment, “Fine, fine…but one more beer.”
“I ALREADY SAID NO.”
“JUST ONE MORE BOTTLE!”
“IM NOT BREAKING POLICY AND YOU’RE DRINKING UP ALL OUR SUPPLY!”
“PLEASE.”
“NO! NOW SHUT UP! YOU’RE CAUSING SO MUCH TROUBLE FOR ME, GOD!”
You both huffed and puffed after the dragged out argument you exchanged. Who does this idiot think he is? He was so annoying and loud, an arm made out metal, scars all over his toned body…You shook the thoughts out of your head, you could never find this oaf alluring at all.
He growled, “GRAHH, I take back the beautiful compliment! You’re a mean grumpy lady!”
“WHATCHA SAY TO ME?! I’M GONNA KICK YOUR ASS!” You grabbed the tufts of his red feather jacket.
“KICK MY ASS?! YOU’RE A PIPSQUEAK COMPARED TO ME!”
You scoffed, “You’re just mad that I’m cute and hot and you’re an ugly grease monkey.”
“WHATCHA CALL ME?!” He grabbed the straps of your bikini top with brute force.
“I CALLED YOU AN UGLY GREASE MONKEY, USE YOU THE THING IN YOUR FUCKING HEAD WILL YA!!” You felt a vein protruding from your forehead.
You both intensely glared at each other while still continuing your grip on each other’s collars. You never understood why your boss was so open to pirates in his bar; most of the ones you encountered are brutes, loud, and annoying drunks who don’t know how to keep their hands to themselves.
But there’s something about him that seems so…interesting. In your head, all you could think was how he looks like a brutish monkey; yet, another part of you feels like there’s something different about him. All you could do was just stare-
“Hey, pretty girl, my eyes up here.”
“I WAS ZONING OUT,” you bit hard on your cigarette.
“Staring at my rocking hard pecs, yea ok,” he smirked while softening his grip on your straps.
You scoffed, “You’re built like every other customer who comes over, what makes you think you’re so different?”
He laughed at your bluff, “Whether you like it or not, we’re both similar.”
You thought about it for a second, you didn’t want to admit it but the red-head pirate was right. You both were short-fuses (except, you think of yourself as the “smarter” one). But of course, you admitting this would equal to letting this big oaf win.
You still had a tight grip on his coat, “Even if we did have some type of similarity, you’re a pervert.”
His smirk widened, “Cheap coming from the girl who was literally staring at my toned abs just now. So, really we’re both in the wrong, baby.”
“I TOLD YOU I WAS ZONING OUT-”
“If you dislike me so much, how come you haven’t kicked me out the bar?” He leaned his head on his metal hand.
Oh goddamnit.
“Knowing you, your ass is glued to the fucking bar chair and won’t move,” you lied as you snuffed out your cigarette.
“Well if that the case, why ya still talking to me? You could’ve easily been silent the whole time, but here you are to me…” His red-stained lips forming a devious smile.
You grumbled in annoyance while a heavy blush peaked onto your cheeks, “Shut up.”
His face got closer to yours, the scent of beer tainting his breath which caused you to loosen your grip on him, “Make me.”
————
This is bad. So, so bad. You’re arguing with an annoying red-headed pirate who can’t seem to keep his mouth shut and next thing you’re doing is making out with said pirate while your legs wrapped around his wide waist. His body large stature loomed over you as he had you pinned on the bar countertop. Your lipgloss mixed with his red lipstick as he ravaged his tongue inside your heated mouth, intertwining his with yours.
His sunction on your tongue causing pleasure to build up inside you as you trailed your hands over the scar of his bare chest, his calloused hand squishing the fat of your ass as he teased his fingers under your swim bottoms.
You huffed, “You’re such a brute, y’know?”
“Hah…and you’re just an annoying brat who wants to police everything I do,” he violently smashes his lips back onto you, sucking on your tongue with desperation. Your lips swollen and red as he roughly made out with you — The taste of bitter alcohol lingered in your mouth.
The needy feeling of your clit causing you to buck your hips towards his clothed erection as you sought out for stimulation.
You could feel a smirk on face as he kissed your swollen lips. “Naughty girl humping my cock like a dog in heat.” His hand gives your thigh a tight squeeze.
You felt your cheeks glow with red at his dirty comment, you were so horny for this man it hurt. You continued rubbing your crotch on him, not caring about the consequences you were going to get from him. In fact, it turned you on thinking about the things he might do to you when you disobeyed him like an untrained dog.
Kidd groaned, “Oh, you fucking slut. You wanna be act like one, then fine.”
He backed away from you, causing you to become saddened at his far-proximity, “Show me how you touch yourself.” His eyes darkened as he looked down upon you, his gaze was practically piercing through the windows of your soul.
You widened your eyes at his request. Nonetheless, you followed his instruction as you removed your bikini bottom, revealing your glistening pussy opened your legs enough for him to give him a show. Your cheeks flushed from embarrassment as he watched you with hungry eyes.
You lowered your hand along your sopping wet cunt, a quiet whimper ripped out of you as you rubbed your digits along your erected pearl. You felt as if your legs were giving out as you circled your pearl in a speedy pace. You bit your lip as you held back a loud moan, not wanting to get teased by the red-head.
You lowered your hand as you dipped your middle and ring finger into your soaked opening, your slick coating them --- Slowly, you pumped your opening as you kept your gaze on Kidd. A smirk painted on his face, as his eyes roamed on your spread out figure.
“Fuck…go faster and I’ll give you a prize, babe,” His fingers pulling down on his metal zipper as he reached for his erection behind his white boxers. You simultaneously pumped your fingers faster as you watched him grab his hardened cock through the boxer’s crotch hole — his shaft was pale, bringing out the pink color of his tip; precum dripping onto the wooden floor as it twitched with need.
A hiss escaped through his teeth as he rubbed his thumb over the leaky slit, spreading his precum over the head. He toyed with his sensitive tip as he kept his eyes on your stuffed cunt. The sight of the short-fused captain masturbating along with you was quite a shock, but who were you to complain?
The more you increased the pace of your fingers, the more you felt your orgasm approaching. A part of you wanted to halt this process altogether, yet, you found a sort of pleasure in being controlled by Kidd. You couldn’t explain it.
You knew this was wrong. You knew this was gonna get you in trouble with your boss…But who fucking cares? It doesn’t hurt to break a rule or two!
“Stop.”
You paused your actions; the feeling of your stomach turning from anxiety as you awaited his next commands. He leaned towards your ear, his warm breath hitting along your lobe, “Thanks for making it wet for me, pretty girl~”
Your eyes slightly widened at his comment as you stared back at him with puppy eyes. He couldn’t help but coo at your expression before spreading your legs to make room for his wide torso. You nervously gulped as you felt the head of his cock align with your hole.
“You workin’ tomorrow?”
“No, I’m off. Why you asking?”
He chuckled before darkening his gaze, “‘Cause I’m gonna fuck ya hard.”
You squeaked as you felt him push the head of his cock further into your crying hole. A grunt slipping through his teeth as he felt your gummy walls clench around him, the feeling of his tip kissing your cervix.
“Just yell out ‘red’ if I’m being too rough,” he smirked.
You smirked back, “This ain’t my first time so you don’t gotta be gentle with me. If you break any glasses, I’ll clean em’ up.”
He swore he felt his cock twitch from your confidence before he pulled back his hips and thrusted into you. You gasped at the sudden intrusion before replacing it with a moan of pleasure.
The feeling of his cock bullying your sweet spot became overwhelming as you felt that familiar sensation of pleasure creep up in your pelvis. You instinctually held onto Kidd’s broad shoulders as he continued to thrusting into you, the feeling of his scars tickled your fingertips. Your leg accidentally kicked the empty mug off the countertop, the sound of glass shattering onto the floor not even distracting you from Kidd’s savage thrusts.
The emptiness of the bar was only filled with echoes of your grunts and moans, the sound of skin colliding as he roughly pounded into you. The way his hips followed a pattern as his movements became needier and sloppier. You were becoming drunk off the way he mercilessly used your pussy like a toy.
You felt a harsh slap on the side of your ass causing you to let out a quiet gasp, “what the hell, Kidd?!”
“What? You liked it, don’t lie,” he growled.
You retaliated by slapping his face, a deep grunt escaped from his smeared lips. His face becoming hot from anger and pleasure. “That was kind of hot,” was what he thought. A devilish smile appearing on your face as you watched him rub the impact from your slap.
He turned to you before smirking back at you, “You really like talking back, huh?”
“What? You like it, don’t ya,” a glint forming in your eye.
He chuckled while having a dark look on his face, “Then, turn that ass around, pretty girl.”
You shifted your body as you laid your chest on the bar counter, your feet arched onto your tippy toes as you faced your ass towards him.
You heard a curse slip out of him as he walked closer to your bent over figure, grabbing the plushness of your ass fat. He aligned himself with your hole before rutting his hips towards yours.
Your quiet moans and whimpers were enough to bring music to his ears as he watched his cream-coated cock disappear into your pussy. His eyes focused on the way your ass recoiled from the impact of his hips, it was so intoxicating he couldn’t help but giving it another smack.
You couldn’t help but arch your back as he continuously fucked you silly. It was getting pathetic…really. You for sure knew you were getting fired if your boss walked in on you getting pounded like a slut by a customer past closing hours. Yet, the thought sent your adrenaline running laps throughout your bloodstream.
Kidd panted as he lowered towards your ear, “You like getting fucked silly by a pirate, pretty girl?”
“N-no! T-this is just a one time thing,” you lied as you felt the sweat drip off your forehead.
He chuckled into your ear, “That’s not what your pussy says.”
He grabbed a fistful of your hair as his hips started to lose momentum from his impending orgasm. He let out a deep grunt as he slowed his pace, “How ‘bout I stuff my cum in ya? Bet ya look pretty with my cum dripping outta ya pussy.” You hummed a little sound of approval, “Fuck…I wanna cum on your cock so bad.” He laughed as he caressed your cheek with a painted finger, “So direct, babe…”
He hissed as he bucked his hips further into you as he chased his orgasm with yours. You held onto the counter for dear life as he drove his cock into your g-spot violently.
Suddenly, a wave of release washed over Kidd as he felt his seed escaped his balls, filling your swollen pussy. Your orgasm shortly approached after as your hole swallowed his cock, your legs gave out as you hung onto the counter. Both your faces sweaty and red from the intense heat of your intimacy you shared, clothes strewn across the floor, hair disheveled into a tangled mess while catching your breaths.
He watched in awe as his fluids mixed with yours as it dripped down your leg, leaving a tiny pool of white onto the wooden floors. His calloused finger stuffed the milky white liquid back into your abused hole, “Bad to waste food, manager.” You flipped him the bird in response as you continued gasping for oxygen.
After, the both of you guys washed yourselves up and mopping the evidence off your floors, you both sat down silently in-front of the bar. The silence was so deafening, a pin drop could be heard. The tension was thick, considering you guys fucked not too long ago. And you guys fucked hard…
“So, you gonna pay your tab?” You broke the silence.
His soft chuckle escaped the red-head’s lips, “That wasn’t enough?”
You scoffed while hitting his arm, “Sex doesn’t pay for cheap beer.”
He playfully shoots you puppy eyes before giving up, “Fine, you’re lucky that you’re hot.”
He slides the paper currency towards you, the smell of berries taking over your sense of smell like perfume (cause you a greedy bitch). “That’ll be going towards my paycheck,” you wink.
His booming laugher filled the empty bar, “Join my crew and you can get 10x more.”
You chuckled before grabbing a cigarette from your bikini top and lighting it, “Not the first time i’ve been told that.”
His demeanor switched from cheerful to confusion, “Say what?”
“Strawhat practically begged me,” you used your pointer finger to turn his head towards the wall on his left, a pinboard collection of bounties hanging by tacks.
The word ‘strawhat’ was like a trigger as his eyes landed on the words, Monkey D. Luffy, with a picture of the smirking rubber boy grinning playfully.
He dropped his head in his hands,
“Curse you, Strawhat.”
e/n: srry for the long wait, writers block a bitch + was busy!! (also srry for the shitty ending lmao)
#one piece#eustass kid#eustasscaptainkid#fanfic#oneshot#one piece smut#smut#eustass x reader#eustass kidd smut
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If you scroll back far enough you’ll see this account was mainly Umbrella Academy posting. I was OBSESSED with this show, especially when s3 came out despite the writing being objectively…iffy in some scenes. But I knew how GOOD the show could be, and hell, s3 WAS GOOD!
And then s4 happened.
And let’s just say
I’m disappointed :D
Spoilers for everything s4 here on out
Ok so watching this season was like being trapped in a burning building but you’re trying to rescue your things, but then you realize they’re also all on fire. I kept watching, thinking “oh, this is gonna lead to this” or “oh that’s a cool reference to that” and NOTHING HAPPENED???
Like in the beginning, with Alison. I thought for sure, everyone was just gonna not like her for a majority of the season, she does something really cool/saves them and then they go “ok, we aren’t gonna forgive you, because what you’ve done to all of us is not able to be forgiven, but we’re gonna try to be better and include each other in our lives”
Nope
They just forgave her off camera and she was just enjoying life with them
And so I’m like “ok, I can excuse that, besides there WAS a 6 year timeskip, maybe we’ll see something with th-“
Nope
Another thing, the sake bombs
My brother in christ Klaus THREW IT ON SOMEONE ELSE AND JUST??? THAT PERSON DIDNT GET HIS POWERS?? My partner legit turned to me and was like “oohhh he’s gonna get Klaus’ powers that’s gonna be so cool.”
But nope that guys never shown again!!
“Okay…” I say slightly nervous “but Klaus is objectively the fan favorite, they can’t fuck up his character”
But then they did. Now iirc, Vietnam wasn’t mentioned at all in s3, and if it was, it was minimum, but there were SO MANY INSTANCES TO BRING IT UP AND THEY JUST DIDNT??
And I tried to excuse it, but legit it was so obvious that they should’ve brought it up. Ignoring the fact Klaus GOT DAVES DOG TAGS BACK AND SAID/DID NOTHING BUT LOOK AT THEM?? you have the scene where everyone is shooting as each other and he’s hiding in the hallowed out part of a grave (which, idk, reminds me of TRENCHES??? Which I’m like 80% sure was used in the Vietnam war) and also, did NOTHING. He covered his ears and I’m sitting there, thinking “oh maybe a flashback”
Nope!
MY BROTHER IN CHRIST I CANT STOP EXCUSING IT, BUT I DO
Cuz when he got locked in the coffin, I’m thinking “oh perfect time to bring up the mausoleum-“
Nope
(Also the way the show tried to make it a joke that he was being used for sex to get money left such a bad taste in my mouth. Like we physically saw him get SA’d and just…it’s a joke??? Like already we had that gross SA of Luther in s3 does NO ONE UNDERSTAND HOW SENSITIVE OF A TOPIC THAT IS??)
Then, obvs there’s the fuckup with Five
At this point, I’m beaten and broken. I have a pounding headache, the dogs looking at me and my partner funny cuz we keep screaming and- HOLY FUCK FIVE IS KISSING LILA
Five, the physically-25-mentally-65 year old, whose ENTIRE CHARACTER MOTIVATION IS HIS FAMILY
Is kissing Lila, the 30 something WIFE OF HIS BROTHER
His brother. Who he saw DEAD IN A FUCKING APOCALYPSE.
I just ??? It’s so bad??? Why??? Did you think??? That was a good idea??? No one asked for that??
(+ there was no reason to include that arc, or the fact that Lila and Diego were unhappy in their marriage. Lila, maybe I can understand, but Diego had NO REASON. Get rid of those arcs, fucking nothing changes)
And I can talk about the bracelet inconsistency, or how they only made Luther a stripper for shock value, but this post is long enough so I’m just gonna mention one final grievance
The ending.
SPOILERS FOR THE ENDING OF THE MAGNUS ARCHIVES
Now, I’ve enjoyed media where they permanently kill off the main characters. Like Magnus Archives (something I frequently would post here)
In the season five finale, they kill of Jon and Martin because it’s the only way to save their world. It makes sense, Jon is already the Pupil of the Ceaseless Watcher + for him and martin, it’s genuinely the only way they can have a decent ending
If they were to keep living, they’d doom the world to constantly be in the eyepocalypse. They address what could’ve been a plot hole by saying “no, living isn’t an option, as much as we want it to be.”
And it’s a satisfying ending! Ask any TMA fan, and they’ll agree that, while sad, it was a perfect ending. So when Umbrella Academy tried to do the same I was…confused? Because that truly WASNT THE ONLY OPTION??
The scene with all the Fives where they’re like “oh btw your family causes the apocalypse every time” I thought we all kinda new that by now….
But also it wasn’t. I am firm in my belief that what caused the apocalypse every time was
1) their powers
And 2) their REACTIONS to each other
S1, for example. Viktors powers inherently cause the apocalypse, but it’s the characters reaction TOWARDS VIKTOR (cough cough Luther) that REALLY seal the deal.
So, no diner Five, it wasn’t THE FAMILY, it was your POWERS. If y’all just…don’t use them and get some family therapy, you guys are FINE.
(Also my partner brought this up, but having a show that revolves around the trauma of the main cast ending with “killing yourself is the only option” is…definitely a choice!)
So yeah. This entire season was trash from start to finish. The songs were not good, the character arcs were not good, the story itself was not good. Everything done was either for shock value (ie making the astronaut a STRIPPER.), ruined characters in ways that didn’t make any narrative sense (Five kissing Lila), or were dragged on far too long (Diego and Luther in the CIA).
And I really don’t want to hate on it, because I love this show, but I really have nothing good to say. It was bad start to finish. Get me out of this burning building, ‘cause my stuffs already burnt.
#the umbrella academy#tua#tua season 4#umbrella academy rant#tua spoilers#klaus hargreeves#five hargreeves#diego hargreeves#lila hargreeves#allison hargreeves#luther hargreeves#tma#surprisingly#tma spoilers
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Well, I guess I’m continuing to make these now! Here’s the next part of my thoughts on every Magnus Archives episode! Now, last time I said that I was planning to write about episodes 21-40 in the next post, but as it turns out, the hyperfixation has set in and my thoughts are a LOT longer (so buckle up if you want to read this), and I also reached the tag limit. So, I’m only going to be covering episodes 21-30 here, and then I’ll write about episodes 31-40, and this 10 episode trend will probably continue for the rest of the posts, but that just means I’ll be able to put them out faster.
Also, unlike my first post, where I wrote all of my thoughts after finishing episode 20, all of these ones were written right after I finished the specific episode I talked about, so my thoughts are a lot more clearly documented. Finally, there’s a link to my masterpost, which will contain all the post’s detailing my thoughts on every episode before and after these ones.
Once again, no spoilers for future episodes please, and for anyone who hasn’t watched up to episode 30, spoilers are under the cut, so I recommend turning away until you’ve caught up. :)
- Episode 21, Freefall 🪂
Statement of Moira Kelly, regarding the disappearance of her son Robert.
WHAT THE FUCK??!! MARTIN??!! DAMN, I guess the horrors did get to him! Well, it’s nice to finally meet him, even if his first line was dropping shit on the ground. Either way, I get the vibe I’m in for a wild ride for this second half. ….What was I talking about? Oh yeah, the actual statement. Anyways this one upset me. Not only did it bring out my fear of heights pretty well, but the portrayal of a grieving mother who can’t comprehend what happened to her son was really heartbreaking. The line “The sky ate him” was kind of comedic at first, especially with Jon’s following reaction (love this guy btw, he’s such a loser), but then it became really horrific when I realized how it was just Moira desperately trying to make sense of the impossible horrors she just witnessed. The plot thread set up with Simon and Harriet Fairchild is also very interesting, and the whole sky thing kind of reminded me of Dominic’s visions in Ep. 4. Overall another one of many fantastic episodes, but HOLY SHIT I’M SCARED.
- Episode 22, Colony 🔦
Statement of Martin Blackwood, archival assistant at the Magnus Institute, London, regarding a close encounter with something he believes to have once been Jane Prentiss. Statement taken direct from subject.
….aaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! Ok let’s start from the top. Firstly, I’m really happy we finally got to meet Martin in this episode, and he’s great! Honestly he comes off as more dorky than stupid, and just comes off as a real sweetheart, so Jon’s distaste for him (outside of very different personalities), gets more mysterious. Though all things considered, after what he experienced, I don’t think that the bullying is his biggest worry anymore… Alexander J. Newall does a fantastic delivery, as much as I love Jon’s readings, you can really feel how terrified Martin is here (also “Blackwood” is a sick as fuck last name, and I related to him trailing off about spiders…) Outside of Martin himself, we have Jane Prentiss (or what remains of her) and…well, let’s just say that I don’t find the sex worms nearly as funny anymore. Jane and the worms inside her are absolutely terrifying, and while I would say I’m excited to learn more about her, I wouldn’t be complaining if the institute staff never had to deal with her again. Also the text episode made me, if you’ll excuse my language…squirm. Honestly, this might just be my favorite episode so far. The way that the plot threads from previous episodes connected here was extremely satisfying, and needless to say, I’m very excited and horrified to see where the show goes from here.
- Episode 23, Schwartzwald 🇩🇪
Statement of Albrecht von Closen, regarding a discovered tomb near his estate in the Black Forest.
Worst episode ever because Jon didn’t do a German accent, smh. Ok but in all seriousness, I really liked this one! It wasn’t the strongest in terms of complex themes in my opinion, but it had a great vibe, and was still very interesting, entertaining, and decently creepy. Having a “statement” written before the archives was founded is a really cool idea that’s executed perfectly here, and while we didn’t learn that much about Jonah Magnus, I still found it cool to get a first glimpse of the archives’ history. (Also, given the eye imagery that appears both in here and in other episodes, I can’t help but feel like Albrecht’s wording of Jonah having “good eyes” or something like that is a little weird…) And…now that we have the instance of something that isn’t a statement, but is important being in the archives, I absolutely agree with the idea that Gertrude Robinson organized these poorly on purpose, so that Jon would get the knowledge he needed to have. Regardless, this whole episode had the vibes of a classic ghost story, which while not as weird and off-putting as some of the other horror here, was still a nice change of pace overall. The descriptions of The Schwartzwald were really well done and added to the atmosphere, and I just like the fact that we have another historical episode, that’s also set outside of The UK. Also, the way that they played with the time period at the end was amazing, I already had my suspicions due to the eye imagery, but the reveal of Mary Keay (and therefore Gerard Wa- I mean Keay) being a descendant of Albrecht was still really cool. I also do wonder if the Arabic book was eventually found by Jurgen Leitner in the future…eh, food for thought. Lastly, I loved Martin jumping in out of nowhere, it was both funny, and a grim reminder about how fucked the archives supposedly are, yippee!
Wow, these are a lot longer than my previous thoughts. This, my sweet children, is a phenomenon called “brain rot”.
- Episode 24, Strange Music 🪆
Statement of Leanne Denikin, regarding an antique calliope organ she possessed briefly in August 2004.
Jon, honey, are we not going to elaborate on the fact that one of ✨the horrors✨is literally inside the institute? Like, HELLO? That’s not terrifying at all! Anwyays, this episode continues the trend of making me scared of things I’m not initially scared of, yippee! It had great vibes as well, the weird shit in the attic was made to be as creepy as possible. Initially, I didn’t find this one to be too scary, and figured it was going to go in the direction of “music makes people feel kind of weird”. AND THEN JOSHUA GETS KILLED AND TURNED INTO A DOLL HELLO??!!! Like, I know he was kind of a toxic boyfriend, but DAMN, whatever was behind the calliope and the dolls did NOT have to go that far. (Also until the end I thought he might be Joshua Gillepsie, and like, I don’t care how toxic he is, but you do not dump a guy who bested an evil coffin with his freezer.) Outside of that, It was really cool to meet Sasha! I like her voice, and the introduction was quite funny. (Also, even as someone who has lived in England for over two years, and has a family that is 90% British, nothing hurt more that Jon’s “Americans”.) Lastly, I have a theory, which I like to call “Ringmaster? More like cult leader.” Because I’M SORRY, but you cannot convince me that a CIRCUS, called THE CIRCUS OF THE OTHER, which possessed a HAUNTED CALLIOPE ORGAN, is anything but a cult. (Watch me when I’m inevitably wrong lmao.)
I guess now is a better time than any to say that I’m kind of wondering if there’s an in-universe reason for the music in the background? I mean, considering that the whole framing device is Jon recording these statements, I have to wonder if there’s a reason for the noise we hear, especially with the worms in Ep. 22 and the music in Ep. 24.
- Episode 25, Growing Dark ⛪️
Statement of Mark Bilham, regarding events culminating in his visit to Hither Green Chapel.
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I LOVE BEING RIGHT!!! I saw the episode title and immediately assumed this would continue the lore of Episode 9, and I WAS SO RIGHT!!! (Also, I now just noticed that the PCOTDH’s symbol is a closed eye, while The Keay Family’s symbol is an open eye…my cult theory thickens…) Anyways, this was another very enjoyable episode! Firstly, even though it’s far from the first piece of media to do so, I though the way they portrayed a cult brainwashing someone when they’re most vulnerable was very well handled and pretty depressing. I also really enjoyed how the episode isn’t the most weird and paranormal on it’s own, but the knowledge of the connections to Ep. 9 makes us know that it DEFINITELY is, even when the characters in the story don’t. The episode was certainly very spooky, the description of the spinach and the dark church definitely got me. (Also my mom came into my room briefly and when she left she accidentally turned off the light and I nearly screamed.) There were also some really interesting plot threads set up here, like the chanting of the northern most human settlement in the world, the mention of “three hundred years waiting”, and I also wonder if “Mr. Pitch” is an alias for “Detective Rayner.” then…the ending. Holy shit. You know, maybe I DON’T need to know what happened to Gertrude….
Episode 26, A Distortion ☕️
Statement of Sasha James, assistant archivist at the Magnus Institute, London, regarding a series of paranormal sightings. Statement taken direct from subject.
I…what…I don’t even…we are so fucked. Ok, there’s a LOT going on here, but I’ll try my best to formulate my thoughts as clearly as possible. Firstly, this episode easily scared me the most so far, I agree with Jon when he says that the horrors being somewhat friendly is scarier than them being antagonistic, like HOLY SHIT this one was unnerving. But with that out of the way…uh…let’s talk about Sasha! She’s really cool, I like how her character gives us a lot more insight into what working in the archives is like for a fairly regular person (i say this because Jon is weird as fuck and Martin is too nice to be normal, and I mean that as kindly as possible). But…while I don’t necessarily doubt her status as the most level-headed person in the archives, I don’t think that’s saying much. Like, she saw a creepy guy with weird-ass hands who spoke in riddles and knew too much about her and her coworkers, and followed him into a dilapidated building, also she works at the council of ghost stories despite not liking horror. Like, no offense, I’m sure she’s overall an intelligent person, as are most people in the archives, but none of them are beating Joshua Gillepsie anytime soon (yes I’m still thinking about him.) But mentioning the guy with fucked up hands, WHO OR WHAT EVEN WAS THAT??!! I have very little ideas as to how this “Micheal” even connects to the greater picture. I know some people connected him to the mentions of the man with bones in his hands in Episode 8, but that honestly reminds me more of the Leitner in Episode 17. Outside of that, his name is quite interesting, I initially thought that he might be Micheal Crew, but given that Sasha doubts it being his real name, I have my suspicions (although it would give us a connection between this, the words in Episode 8, and The Boneturner’s Tale….hm….) However, I could absolutely see him being Micheal Keay, as he gives off enough ghost vibes to pass as him (and I’m assuming that if Gerard’s dead, Micheal is as well.) Also he is not described as having a Lichtenburg figure on him so…yeah. Lastly, we have the return of THE SEX WORMS. And as happy(?) as I am to see that The Magnus Archives, a podcast developed by RustyQuill.com, that is also licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License, is continuing it’s message of staying abstinent, all things considered, that was absolutely terrifying. I just LOVE the knowledge that the worms are a hive-mind and that Jane might not be the source, I LOVE THAT SO MUCH. In conclusion, I am probably going to sleep with a fire extinguisher tonight, and I am very scared for what the next 14 episodes have in store for me.
Also I guess I’ll mention Tim (the archival assistant, not the dead guy) here because why not. So far I’m getting major bastard energy from people’s descriptions of him, which means I will either love or hate him. Also I found it very funny but also kind of sad that Jon said he only trusts Tim to not prank him in Episode 11, and then he pulled a prank shortly before this statement took place.
- Episode 27, A Sturdy Lock 🔑
Statement of Paul McKenzie, regarding repeated nocturnal intrusions into his home.
Ok, after everything that happened in the last episode, it was nice to get a short and sweet one here. Well, as sweet as an episode of a horror podcast can be. Overall, this one isn’t my favorite, I thought it was a little bit under the standards of creativity for the show as a whole, but that’s obviously not saying much, as it was still pretty damn good in its own right. I think it was definitely very effective with its storytelling, and credit where credit is due, it certainly brought out my fear of weird noises in the middle of the night. And even if I can’t personally resonate with this aspect of it, I do really appreciate how it tackled the idea of mental illness at old age, and while I’d be surprised if the statement wasn’t real, considering where the show seems to be going, it did a very good job at planting seeds of doubt in my mind. But still, it was genuinely pretty crushing how Paul had no proof throughout the entire thing, along with how the cops treated him. It really did make me thing about what would have happened if he hadn’t washed the blood off his hands. It still had a creepy atmosphere, and the reveals at the end were pretty interesting, I hope they show us Marcus’ statement soon enough. Also, the aspect of loneliness in this one did remind me a lot of what happened in Episode 13, so I wonder if there’s some connection there. (Also, I love how I’m 27 episodes in and Jon is STILL roasting Gertrude’s organizational skills.) So while this one isn’t the most interesting for me, I still enjoyed it, and it was nice to have a slightly lighter one after Episode 26. I hope Sasha had a good few days off, she deserves it.
- Episode 28, Skintight 📷
Statement of Melanie King, regarding events at the abandoned Cambridge Military Hospital during filming in January 2015. Statement taken direct from subject.
WHOA THAT WAS SO GOOD!!! Ok, I feel like I should start off with my thoughts on the basic premise, as while those episode is certainly…not the most humorous in its execution, the premise itself kind of is. I don’t know why, but I just thought the idea of there being an in-universe competitor was a really fun concept that was executed perfectly here. It kind of reminds me of something like Hatchetfield and Clivesdale (I don’t know how many people reading this will understand that, but there seems to be overlap between TMA fans and Hatchetfield fans, and also like, shut up, let me indulge in my hyperfixations.) The bickering between Melanie and Jon was great, as was Melanie herself, I’d love to see her again as I think she oddly brought a lot to the world of the series. Although I will say that, while it doesn’t make me like him any less, Jon’s reluctance to buy into statements is a lot more frustrating when there’s another person in the room. I also absolutely love the fact that there’s an in-universe spooky podcast mentioned by name, like, come one, that’s genuinely hilarious. But comedic value aside, this one was definitely pretty creepy. In a similar vain to what Episode 23 was doing, the whole “young people enter creepy abandoned building to film stuff and then get genuinely scared” concept felt evocative of other classic horror stories, and the way they spun it into the context of the show was great. The atmosphere was definitely very creepy as well, as I have mentioned, hospitals creep me the fuck out. And lastly…oh my god, THE CONNECTIONS. So, I’ll start off by saying that all of the skin shit reminded me of what happened in Episode 18 (which I hope is true because I think some connections to other things would make me like that episode more). But that pales in comparison to the fact that we have stuff on THE ANGLERFISH, HOLY FUCK THE ANGLERFISH. I’m SO glad that they didn’t throw it away just because it was in the pilot episode. In retrospect, I think that the story of Episode 1 isn’t quite my favorite. It doesn’t really have to be, as I think the main draw of the episode is getting a first look at the framing device and general vibe of the entire podcast, but the stories didn’t really grab me until Episode 2, which is still one of my favorites. But MAN, this episode really made me appreciate the setup at the beginning so much more, and the knowledge that the people who walked into the alley didn’t necessarily die, meaning that all of those names could potentially come back, is SO exciting to me. In fact, when you consider that Sarah was kind of going through what looked like a possession, I wonder if The Anglerfish is a figure of worship in a cult, if that theory is to be true. (Also I have relatives that live in the same area as Sarah so…maybe I should tell them to watch out for their neighbor lmao.) So yeah, this…this show is just really freaking good.
Note: I have discovered the Leitner rant, and therefore I have achieved true enlightenment.
- Episode 29, Cheating Death ♟️
Statement of Nathaniel Thorp, regarding his own mortality.
I should start off by saying that I love the episode title for this, like, it’s not even metaphorical, the guy literally cheated in a game against death. Well, anyways, the main thing that caught me about the episode was how it absolutely blindsided me. While I was right about the soldier being the same as the statement giver, which I think was supposed to be obvious, everything else in those last six or so minutes left me with a wide-open jaw. (Also, can I just say that I love how poetic this guy just…decided to be? Like, I just love it when the statements really show of personalities with the way they’re written, and it comes with a cool framing device.) Regardless, I initially assumed that it was going in a very traditional line. Nathaniel cheats death, becomes immortal, and regrets it in modern day because he’s lived longer that he really should have. That, combined with the fact that “Death” didn’t seem like the one of the more creative horror monsters in the show so far, had me so prepared to just write this one off as one of my least favorites (once again, not like that’s saying much.) And then the twist comes and HOLY SHIT I WAS WRONG. The idea of there basically being multiple grim reapers at the hands of some unknowable power, who have to gain successors to finally die themselves is absolutely terrifying and extremely clever. I tip my hat to you Rusty Quill, you did a great job at fooling me. Kind of funny considering how this is a story about being punished for your hubris (which seems to be a recurring theme???) I have a few other small thoughts as well. Firstly, I can’t help but shake the feeling that Nathaniel Thorp was an actual revolutionary war soldier, but I can’t find anything online other than the character from this episode. Also, the fact that his fate remains unknown makes me think he’ll show up again, as it seems weird to NOT end the story with confirmation of his death, given the themes. Secondly, a lot of the…less than pleasant imagery here definitely reminded me of Piecemeal and The Boneturner’s Tale. I don’t remember the story inside that Leitner very well, but I might check just in case there’s any parallels between it and this statement. (Update: Not really.) And finally, I was just a little bit intrigued by the fact that we learn no one who was working at the institute in 1972 works there anymore. It’s probably nothing, but given the mysteries surrounding Gertrude’s death, I’m just a little suspicious, both in general, and of Elias because he’s still around. Overall this episode went hard, I’m still kind of stunned by what it pulled off.
Jane Prentiss statement…save me…save me Jane Prentiss statement…
- Episode 30, Killing Floor 🍖
Statement of David Laylow, regarding his time working at an industrial abattoir near Dalton.
You know what, Jon is right, there’s a lot of meat in this show. Not that I’m complaining, I mean, it does fuel my obsession with connecting the dots between statements. Regardless, while this isn’t among my favorite episodes so far, I still had a good time with it. The reason it’s not one of my favorites is purely personal, as I don’t do too well with animal violence. Like, as much as I do really appreciate how viscerally Jonny Sims can describe the statements, I will admit that the opening minutes describing the slaughter house made me more uneasy than the actual horror, and not in a particularly fun way, but it was overall fine. Speaking of the actual horror, that was actually pretty good. The endless hallways lined with doors that lead to precarious situations also kind of tapped into a personal fear of mine, but in a more fun and digestible way. And while the idea of “imagine humans being slaughtered like animals” is something I’ve seen many a time before, it was still much more well executed than many other interpretations of the idea (*cough cough*, peta) and there were also plenty of other interesting themes and ideas, like how the episode touched on the inherent horror of working in a job as gruesome as the killing floor, being enslaved to said job, and the idea that maybe we’re all just walking sacks of meat in the end, and nothing more. As for some other thoughts, I was definitely creeped out by Tom Han, I’m not sure whether or not he’s someone who spreads ✨the horrors✨or someone affected by ✨the horrors✨, and his sudden disappearance was certainly…odd. On top of that, it’s admittedly haunting to know that there’s still creepy stuff going on at the slaughter house, and that this isn’t something that happened to David, and only David. Overall, a pretty good episode, I don’t have much to say about it, but it was a fun time overall.
Tim…save me…save me Tim…
Well, if you’ve made it this far, thank you so much for reading! Genuinely means the world to me when there are people willing to listen to me ramble about my horrible (affectionate) interests lmao. I should have my thoughts on the final episodes of Season 1 out in due time, and while I’m sure it’s obvious, I’m absolutely hooked on this podcast. It absolutely has the potential to become one of my favorite things ever if the overarching plot becomes more involved and this is coming from someone who up until now, wasn’t all that gripped by podcasts. While I’m a little sad that I’m as late to the party as I am, then I remembered “oh yeah, I was in elementary school when this horrifying series came out”, and I’m also hopeful that I’ll be able to be around for The Magnus Protocol while it’s airing (I know it premieres in like a week but still.) Anyways, thanks for reading and hopefully you’ll be around for my thoughts on the next batch :)
#tma#the magnus archives#jonathan sims#moira kelly#robert kelly#simon fairchild#harriet fairchild#martin blackwood#jane prentiss#albrecht von closen#gertrude robinson#jonah magnus#mary keay#gerard keay#joshua gillespie#joshua drewery#sasha james#micheal crew#micheal keay#timothy hodge#jurgen leitner#marcus mckenzie#paul mckenzie#micheal mcweirdhands#melanie king#sarah baldwin#the anglerfish#nathaniel thorp#tom han#david laylow
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Don’t leave me now, please. I still need you.
Paring : Gojo satoru x (f) reader
Genre : angst
Tags : angst, jjk spoilers, minor mentions of death.
You loved him so much, every morning you are greeted by the comfort of his arms, he whispers sweet nothings into your ear; his warm breath brushing against your ear lobe. He reassures that everything would be ok, as long as you had him, everything would be alright. And you believed it, you held onto that fact and held him tight inside your fragile heart and promised yourself that you’d never let go.
He is the bundle of joy in your life, you wouldn’t need anything else as long he was here. You cradled his love in your soft palms and watered it, it grew and soon enough, you became dependent on it. You couldn’t imagine what a life would be like with out him.
Soon you are parted with him, as he had to show the world the “world’s best sorcerer” figure. You are slightly disheartened but you tell yourself that it is okay and that he’d come back home at the end of the day, as he always does. He is the strongest after all.
It hasn’t even been a few hours and you already miss him. You miss the sweet fragrance of him. You miss the mischievous kisses he graces you with, you miss his kisses. Every morning you kiss him as if your life depended on it, you were scared that it would be the last time you’d have the luxury of having Gojo Satoru in your selfish arms.
The sun was setting outside your bedroom window, where you waited for him. You loved the sun sets, you admired it with curiosity and bathed in its beauty. You were fascinated by the change of orange to cold navy blues, covered in a kaleidoscope of stars.
You lay in your shared bed, still patiently waiting for your love to come home. The icy breeze seeped through your curtains and caressed your skin, you shivered. You wonder when he will be home, of course you aren’t too concerned, he has come home later than this but you can’t help but worry for his safety. The only noise keeping you company was the slow ticking of the clock on your bedside table, alongside a picture of you and your dearest in the snow two Decembers ago. You remember that it was Christmas Eve, you brought him outside to see the snow. You said that it looked like his fluffy hair. It was cute, you said.
You slowly drift asleep whilst thinking about that memory. Of course your memory isn’t crystal clear but you remember something about a ‘goodbye’. Tears slowly drip from your eyelashes and you wonder why, you don’t know why you’re crying, did something happen? You don’t understand. For some reason, your chest starts to ache, as if the flower you watered in there had started to wilt and crumble. It was very painful. A shaky sob left you and slowly opened your eyes. You looked towards your door, still anticipating your love’s arrival home. He would not come home. You knew that, yet everyday you waited and waited for him- hoping that one day you’ll wake up in his embrace again.
#anime#gojo satoru#jjk#jjk x reader#jjk spoilers#fyp#angst#jjk satoru#fanfic#jujutsu kaisen#female reader
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LIVE RHY REACTION TO INVESTITURE OF THE GODS
Disclaimer: this is an English translated version and I do not know how accurate it is so if some things are wrong or improperly translated please let me know. I will also be including screenshots of dialogue and scenes every now and then but please keep in mind I will probably not go into too much detail of these chapters and that I am just reacting to the scenes that happen in the book.
This is also VERY LONG because the book itself is very long. Do not read it if you don't want spoilers/want to sit through a lot of text.
I’ll be covering Chapters 1 - 10 in this post
Once again, do not read if it's a lot of text and mute the tag #live rhyactions
CHAPTER 1 (GODDESS NU WA AND KING ZHOU):
I can’t believe they made Li Shou king because he was strong. He threw a pillar and everyone told King Di Yi to make him king like ok cool ig
also in the other version I was reading, King Di Yi was called Da Yi.. wonder if that was a mistranslation or something
“King Zhou established his capital at Zhaoge, a metropolis on the Yellow River.” interesting, in the other version they call it Morning Song. huh! The more you know
“The king placed Queen Jiang in the Central Palace; Concubine Huang in the West Palace and Concubine Yang in the Fragant Palace. They were all virtuous and chaste in their behavior and mind and gentle in manner.” (…) im not gonna comment on how much that last line irks me for some reason but… ough
ANYWAYS HE RULED IN PEACE… YIPPEE
“and his peasants were especially blessed by favorable winds and rains” why did that make me laugh a little ok
the four dukes!!!! yippee!!
East Grand Duke Jiang Huanchu, South Grand Duke E Chongyu, West Grand Duke Ji Chang and North Grand Duke Chong Houhu
i hope none of them die
SEVEN YEARS OF PEACE!!! and then a report was sent to him oh no
ough a rebellion.. of 72 marquises in the North Sea District — surely Grand Tutor Wen Zhong can take care of it right?? surely he’ll take care of it.
Shang Rong asks King Zhou to honor and hold a ceremony at Nu Wa’s temple for her birthay (the 15th day of the third month) and King Zhou has the gall to ask, “What has Goddess Nu Wa done that a great king such as myself is obliged to to go her temple and worship her?”
What if i stab him. what then.
thank you Shang Rong you will always be the smart one of the advisors
King Zhou then makes an announcement that he's going to go worship Nu Wa at her temple. amazing. thank you for that.
“It would have been better if he hadn’t gone at all, for it was this very pilgrimage that caused the fall of the Shang Dynasty, making it impossible for the people to live in peace.” i think it was because he disrespected Nu Wa actually
why did he need 3,000 cavalrymen and 800 royal guards if he is such a well known and respected king… hm…
But they were under the command of General Huang Feihu, Prince for National Pacification and of Military Prowess. so maybe this guy’s important for later. hopefully. i do not want anyone to die yet
except King Zhou but anyways
PRAYERS!!! RESPECT FOR NU WA YES
why are you wandering King Zhou. King Zhou go back.
KING ZHOU.
KING ZHOU NOOO
the most beautiful passages describing Nu Wa and how beautiful she is and how she looks at him with joy and this mfer gets horny. ok.
Or, perhaps, it is about how men’s desires in the past were always the cause of their own downfall because he was warned that Nu Wa was a respected goddess and one he shouldn’t take lightly and, in the end, he ends up disrespecting her all on his own and that is what causes his downfall.
“He desired to possess her and thought to himself in frustration, ‘Though I’m wealthy and powerful and have concubines and maideservants filling my palace, there’s none as beautiful and charming as this goddess.’”
rip bozo you signed your own death warrant
AGAIN, I AM SURPRISED HE ACTUALLY DID WRITE ON THE WALL ABOUT HOW MUCH HE WANTED HER. I THOUGHT THE WIKIPEDIA ARTICLE WAS LYING TO ME BUT NO:
Shang Rong: Nu Wa’s been a proper goddess and the guardian angel for Zhaoge, I only suggested that you worship her so that she would continue to bless the people with timely rains and favorable winds and ensure that they’ll continue to live in peace. But with this poem, you’ve not only shown your lack of sincerity ubut have insulted her as well. This isn’t the way a king should behave. I pray you wash this blasphemous poem off the wall, lest you be condemmed by the people for your immorality. King Zhou: shut up i’m king
NOT THE REST OF HIS MEN LOWKEY SIDE-EYEING HIM….
anyways they go to the Dragon Virtue Court they go where he meets up with his queen and concubines happily. hooray!
Nu Wa paying respect to the three emperors — Fu Xi, Shen Nong and Xuan Yuan — before returning to her temple on her birthday is so nice to me? I know Fu Xi is her brother in some iterations and it makes me happy idk :(
WAIT THE MFER WROTE THIS IN THE MAIN HALL?
IT SAYS SHE SEATED HERSELF IN THE MAIN HALL — NAHHH HE DESERVES WHAT’S COMING TO HIM WHAT THE HELL??
GET HIS ASS!!!
did not know King Zhou had two sons (Yin Jiao and Yin Hong)
anyways he still has 28 years to go before his downfall and Nu Wa realized “that she could do nothing about it at this moment, since that would go against the will of Heaven.”
surely this “against the will of Heaven” won’t be a reocurring theme in the book and it’s successor, Journey to the West, right? Right?
of course it will
NU WA SUMMONING DEMONS AND EVIL SPIRITS FROM THE DEMON SUMMONING PENNANT LET’S GOOOO
“All demons the world has arrived to receive her command” queen shit
IT’S THEM!!! IT’S THE THREE QUEENS OF THE SHANG DYNASTY LET’S FUCKING GO!!!
“May you live eternally, dear goddess!” they have more respect than King Zhou LMAO
“you mustn’t bring harm to the people” uh. anyways.
“since his visit to the Temple of Goddess Nu Wa, King Zhou had sunk into deep depression” shut the fuck go hold your wife
“He had no passion for his queen, his concubines, or the numerous maids in his palace. They now all appeared to him like lumps of clay.” Something poetic about Nu Wa making people out of clay and King Zhou now seeing them as clay—but also fuck this dude
King Zhou: im sad because im in love with nu wa and can’t marry her
what if i kill you
NOT THEM SUGGESTING HE ORDER 100 WOMEN FROM THE GRAND DUKES — BRO NOOOOOO
why is that the end of the chapter
[.....]
CHAPTER 2 (THE REBELLION OF SU HU):
King Zhou: bring me 100 virgins. they must be gentle, virtuous and above all beautiful
i cant with this man.
Shang Rong: you already have 1,000 women you can’t ask for more when your people are dying of drought and floods King Zhou: fine
HES SULKING LMAO
Su Hu… i like Su Hu he doesn’t want to give you any bribes smh
Shut up King Zhou i miss Su Hu
“we greatly appreciate the kind concern shown us by your majesty” i dont trust like that…
what if i killed them all
why are you mentioning Su Hu has a daug- STOP
ISN’T THAT SU DAJI’S FATHER HOLD ON
King Zhou: can i marry your daughter Su Hu: fuck you King Zhou: >:O
NOOO HE FUCKING ARRESTED SU HU WHAT THE HELL
he was right though this kingdom is dying because you’re being too horny King Zhou please listen to REASON
HE (SU HU) WROTE HIS POEM ABOUT KING ZHOU ON THE WALL HELLO?
idk if it’s intentional but it seems like he’s making fun of King Zhou for writing on Nu Wa’s temple wall LMAO i love that
we stan Su Hu
“Our goal is the utter decimantion of the city.”
I miss Su Daji
where’s my wife
Fei Zhong is like… the worst fucking instigator huh? He’s the one who keeps giving King Zhou ideas- i hate men
Ji Chang taking place for King Zhou so he won’t get caught in the cross fire… interesting that he hesitated on that? ig?
“How could possibly have offended the king? He’s known to all for his loyalty and good conduct, and for his many outstanding military successes. There must have been good reason for him to write the poem.” Ji Chang you’re one of the few smart people in this novel
tiredly reading this chapter because…. ough… ji chang,,,, rebel,,, ji chang,,, j i c ha ng,,
ANYWAYS BACK TO SU HU ARRIVING BACK AT JIZHOU
he has a son (Su Quanzhong)???? HE’S A DAD???
wait why am i suprised his daughter’s literally daji nvm
honestly this is great for learning how names work yppee
NOT THE 50,00 STRONG ARMY FROM CHONG HOUHU… OUGH
Su Hu immediately getting angry when he learns Chong Houhu is leading the armyncjks
“Chong’s an evil fellow” LMAO??? OK DAMN
not Su Hu apologizing for not being able to salute properly becuase of his armor
“King Zhou has of late become corrupt and immoral as a ruler” SAY IT LOUDER
LMAO NOOOOOO
NOT THE GUYS FIGHTING
STOP PLEASE NOT SU QUANZHONG
nvm they won HELL YEA
RUN AWAY CHONG HOUHU YOU COWARDS
SURPRISE ATTACK AT MIDNIGHT LETS GOOOOO
i forgot peopel took drums with them to war
not Chong Houhu drinking after Huang Yuanji reassured him it’ll be fine. fool. you’re at war. don’t drink before sleeping
“They rushed in like tigers and wolves, slaughtering and maiming on all sides.” ough i love this novel’s descriptions
SO MANY PEOPLE DYING
“Chong Houhu dismount from your horse and die!” these men are violent
if this is how violent they are im terrified for su daji now LMAO
Su Quanzhong my beloved
NOT HIM KILLING SUN ZIYU WHAT THE HELL
not Chong Houhu fleeing and distracting his son and he ends up gettig killed by Su Quanzhong
THAT’S WHERE IT ENDS???
wow wtf
[.....]
CHAPTER 3 (DAJI ENTERS THE PALACE):
MY QUEEN’S ARRIVING LET’S GO
My queen did not, in fact, arrive
These men are going through it
also i thought Chong Houhu’s son died but no hes just wounded LMAO
MOST OF THIS CHAPTER IS MEN CRYING I CAN FEEL IT
Chong Houhu is finally smart for once in acknowledging he cannot win this
“A huge army is marching towards us at great speed.” PLEASE SAY IT’S SU HU COMING TO KICK EVERYONE’S ASS
oh.
nvm
Chong Heihu, the Black Tiger, the Marquis of Caozhou
why does he have a brother-
Black Tiger: i heard you got your shit rocked
Su Hu: Black Tiger’s here? We’re screwed
Sun Quanzhong is so cool but also so so stupid
bro your dad is telling you this guy is trouble because he knows MAGIC bro
Bro don’t go off to fight your dad’s sworn brother bro no
NOT THEM CAPTURING SUN QUANZHONG
BRO
BRO WHAT THE HELL
HERE COMES BLACK TIGER WITH THE STEEL CHAIR
nvm the steel chair was Black Tiger winking and trying to give Sun Quanzhong a signal that he is, in fact, siding with his dad but Sun Quanzhong is too stubborn and fucking decides to fight Black Tiger
honestly bro what did you expect
GET FFUCKING CAPTURED BRO
DUMB OF ASS… STUBBORN BOY SOBS
also no Black Tiger isnt a tiger he’s a human thats just his name i hope i dont have to clarify that again oops
bro
bro???
SU HU WHAT THE HELL???
so… petition to beat up Su Hu??
NO
NO
NO
NO
OH MY GOD
BRO ALMOST KILLS HIS DAUGHTER- WHAT THE HELL??
Why does he blame her and not the man who is lusting after his, supposedly, young daughter? Why doesn’t he curse the man that was a tyrant and has been growing lustful with power? Why doesn’t he realized that she is not to blame for she does not even know what is happening?
Ough.
Black Tiger: Brother, if only you would only consult with me, I could withdraw my troops. Why do you fear and refuse to see me? I don’t understand! There’s no ned to launch an attack.
black tiger and su hu have an interesting relationship.
hm.
tfw even your men are wondering why you are suddenly acting so strange
bro Black Tiger did something to Su Hu huh….
GENERAL ZHENG… OUGH
hes going to fight black tiger oh boy
“Black Tiger was mounted on a fiery-eyed monster” what if i eat him
General Zheng Lun of Jizhou… inchresting
interesting.
NJKCDSNJCD FUCKER CAPTURED HIM SO QUICKLY WHAT???
also Black Tiger’s smoke magic >>>> LMK!Macaque’s shadow magic sorry lmao forgot to mention that
Su Hu: I cant believe Zheng Lun died Zheng Lun: i’ve captured the black tiger Su Hu: what the fuck-
“I’ve never forgotten that we’re sworn brothers. I’m ashamed to be a captive and greatly appreciate your courtesy.”
Black Tiger And Su Hu Have An Interesting Relationship (by which i mean it's strange seeing male friendship represented like this in such an old novel but it's a /pos kind of strange yknow)
uhm.
anyway.
SHUT THE FUCK UP SAN YISHENG PLEASE. STOP
WDYM KING ZHOU WROTE A POEM NOOOO
Poem basically says to let him marry Daji or else they’ll all die.
Su Hu Is Considering This.
“How could I dare to oppose his wishes!” bro you literally told him to act like a better king what’s happening right now-
what if i die
wdym the chapter ends there.
what
[.....]
CHAPTER 4 (THE FOX SPRITE MURDERS DAJI):
the title goes straight to the point huh-
“I won’t sacrifice my life on account of my adoration for my daughter” Su Hu what if you shut the fuck up
yo what the fuck
Black Tiger going off on Chong Chouhu what
wow.
anyway-
“As I cannot let the family perish on account of Daji, I’ve got no choice but to send her back to the palace and apologize to His Majesty.” Su Hu i want you to choke
aw madame yang crying over daj-
what the fuck
huh
huh
huh
WHAT
I MEAN I GET W H Y
BUT
HUH???
y’all she’s gonna die either way im sorry-
“The old couple spent the whole night in despair and sorrow.” and y’all didnt… like.. want to fight for her or…. ok
when’s erlang showing up so he can beat up everyone
OG DAJI DID NOT DESERVE THIS
LOOK AT HER SHE BREAKS DOWN INTO TEARS WHEN SHE HEARS ABOUT WHERE SHE’S GOING
OUGH MY POOR GIRL
Su Hu after hearing there might be a murderous spirit haunting the place they’re staying at: SURELY THIS WON’T AFFECT US IN ANY WAY POSSIBLE
He checked in on Daji to make sure she and her maidservants were sleeping before reading a book on war strategy…
sir make up your mind either cherish her and love her or send her off to be married to a man probably twice her age
HE STARTLES THE GOES TO CHECK IN ON HER
OUGH
EITHER BE A GOOD DAD OR DONT BE A GOOD DAD WTF
the fact he stays awake to keep her safe
wtf
oop
OOP
LMAO
SHES DEAD SORRY LMAO
so.. who’s gonna tell him..
Fei Zhong: Su Hu is here to offer his daughter King Zhou: Why??? Fei Zhong: …b…because you asked for it-
mfer is so offended and for what
Shang RONG MY BELOVED
THE ONLY MAN WITH FUCKING COMMON SENSE LETS GO
and then Fei Zhong ruins it by saying if Daji is beautiful enough then they can forgive Su Hu and if she’s ugly then they can kill her and his father ok wow wtf
SU DAJI MY BELOVED <333
the fact they say she wears red… and i hc’d she wore pink/violets on her way to the kingdom.. and when the spirit kills her and possesses her she’s fully red clothed…. ough..
Can he like… not…. can he not….
I MEAN
i know why she’s so ethereal to him
because hulijing are said to be bewitching to people and they fall in love with them easily
but also fucking come on dude what the hell
sorry this whole thing is jsust… you have to read it to understand how ANGRY i am at this motherfucker right now
“passionate blissful night” daji im so sorry dude ough
NOT HIM FUCKING NEGLECTING ALL HIS DUTIES IMMEDIATELY
BRO I THOUGHT IT TOOK… LIKE 13 MORE CHAPTERS
MFER IS JUST…. GONE
WOW
WHAT A WAY TO END THE FUCKING CHAPTER
OUGH
[.....]
CHAPTER 5 (A VAIN ATTEMPT BY MASTER OF THE CLOUDS):
Master of the Clouds: she’s going to bring calamities
GOD FORBID WOMEN DO ANYTHING DAMN
also like???
she hasnt murdered anyone
Nu Wa sent her
why are people triyng to exorcise her already wtf-
TNE FUCKING MONTHS?
KING ZHOU HAS BEEN DRINKING AND FUCKING FOR TEN MONTHS???? HASNT APPEARED IN TEN MONTHS??? BROTHER WHAT
everyone: we’re worried King Zhou: anyways
HES SO FUCKINGNCJKDSNJK
im so tired of this dude
JUST DO YOUR FUCKING WORK??
where’s his wife bro
where are his sons
what the hell
Master of the Clouds explains taoism
ngl it’s pretty cool
i wont post the whole thing but it’s genuinely cool
he made a poem about the spirit lmao
PINE SWORD… SOUNDS SO COOL TBH
i want a pine sword
HE MADE ANOTHER POEM SAYIG HOW NICE HIS LIFE IS AS A TAOIST MASTER
THAT’S…
i like this dude
funky
Master of the Clouds: this pine sword will kill the spirit in 3 days King Zhou: Cool! Daji:
MOTHERFUCKER BELIEVES HER
OH MY GOD
GASLIGHT. GATEKEEP. GIRLBOSS.
motherfucker you CANNOT BE THIS DUMB OH MY GODNJDKSNJCKDS
bro
BRO
i cant believe it fucking ends there DAMN LMAO
[.....]
CHAPTER 6 (THE BURNING PILLAR TORTURE):
i wonder what this chapter’s about oh boy
she recovered and carried on with her merry-making… i love her actually
“(…) Jiang Ziya will enjoy worldly glory and filfth, and fifth, gods are to be created.” ayo?? first even Jiang Ziya mention
iirc Jiang Ziya was Erlang’s mentor? I could be wrong but yknow yippeeee
so basically, to recap: Master of the Clouds sends a poem to Grand Tutor Du Yuanxian and he immediately writes a report to King Zhou. Shang Rong receives the report and tries to present it to the king at his personal palace
oh boy
Du Yuanxian: hey so the spirit in your home is growing really powerful to the point where the spectral light she emits can be seen in the ninth realm King Zhou: HE ALMOST KILLED DAJI >:(
sorry guys he is…
he sure is something. this man. yea
He asks Daji if she knows anything about this and she just
oh my god.
SHANG TRYING TO REASON WITH HIM OUGH…
Du Yuanxian waiting eargly for news of what King Zhou said,,,,,, only to be told hes a criminal and will be executed bro what
Mei Bo: dw bro i’ll talk to the king and tell him this is all a misunderstanding
i bet hes gonna get killed too lmao
HE CHASTIED SHANG RONG FOR TELLING HIM HE’S LETTING INNOCENT MEN GET SLAUGHTERED BRO PLEASE
KING ZHOU IS SO ANGRY MEI BO ENTERED THE PALACE LMAO
Shang Rong gets a pass because hes so polite (and he’s a veteran and served for three Shang Dynasty emperors)
MEI BO FUCKING CALLING KING ZHOU OUT…
“Du Yuanxian’s a loyal minister. If you put him to death on account of your concubine, you’ll be cursed for butchering your father’s old minister, and denounced as the destroyer of the nation, for your act tantamount to wrecking a house by removing its pillars and beams. I exhort you to let Du Yuanxian live, for it you do, people will honor you as saintly ruler.” i like mei bo
KING ZHOU IS NOW KILLING MEI BO AS WELL
MEI BO WENT OFF LMAO
“You listen daily to the fawning courtiers and spend your nights in dissipation with Daji. The kingdom will suffer disaster soon, and I fear that I won’t have the face to contront our deceased kings in the nether world.” GO OFF MEI BO…. OUGH
….go off girl
go off
like
i - go off honeslty
KING ZHOU LOVES THIS IDEA
SHANG RONG RETIRES BECAUSE HE CANNOT HANDLE THIS ANYMORE
HE WANTS NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS ANYMORE
GO OFF SIR GO
LVIE YOUR LIFE
GOODBYE SHANG RONG… YOU WILL BE MISSED GREATLY SOBS
“King Zhou continued to indulge with Daji day and night, ignoring all state affairs.” daji if you kill him now i wont tell anyone promise
iMMA GET YOU OUT OF THERE GIRL
aside from that, some princes arrived and they were all horrified by Mei Bo's execution after witnessing it and declared they have to do something to stop King Zhou
King Zhou is too infatuated with Daji to notice this ofc-
i feel so bad for King Zhou’s wife
ough… next chapter
[.....]
CHAPTER 7 (FEI ZHONG PLOTS TO DEPOSE THE QUEEN):
…uh oh-
“When the guards announced her (Queen Jiang) arrival, King Zhou glanced at Daji with half-closed eyes. ‘Lady Su! Would you please meet Her Majesty for me?’” bro you have little to no decency…
mfer you’re not even going to go greet your own wife??????
what the fuck man
also i do like that they explain Daji is a “mere concubine” so she doesn’t get to sit down. very interesting
NVM KING ZHOU IS IN FACT THERE TO GREET HIS WIFE BUT I FULLY BELIEVED HE WAS GOING TO STAY BACK AT THEIR ROOM DRINKING WHILE DAJI HAD TO ENTERTAIN HER OKAY
i love daji she’s just singing and dancing and enjoying herself i bet
fuck off King Zhou i don’t need you complimenting her
Queen Jiang: this isn’t good King Zhou: why can’t you enjoy yourself Queen Jiang: BECAUSE OF YOU
GO OFF QUEEN JIANG????
HOLY SHIT
i sure do hope nothing bad happens to Queen Jiang today
King Zhou is fucking drunk!!!!
amazing!!! /s
we love a manipulative queen holy shit
SHE’S SO GOOD AT IT TOO???
HOW MANY TIMES HAS THIS MFER FALLEN FOR EHR CRYING
IT’S INSANE
i’m pretty sure any other man would’ve told her to stop crying or something
damn
abusing the fact he’s so in love with her huh
Queen Jiang: You’ve seduced and incited him to all manner of evil. You’re the instigator and must repent at once. If you continue to wreck havoc upon this dynasty, I will deal with you according to the law! You may leave now. Daji: Daji: so i’m planning to murder her-
no really she tells Gun Juan she must seek her revenge i love her nckjs
Gun Juan is so cool?
“I’m a mere maidservant” girlie you are so smart actually
it’s a solid plan too? i didn’t expect it ngl i thought they were going to curse Queen Jiang but nope! just regular plan which is very nice
bro this isnt a debate come on man
let’s go murder the queen
come on fei zhong-
HELL YEA FEI ZHONG HAS A PLAN
Everyone: go back to work King Zhou: bah Daji: go back to work King Zhou: ofc anything for you daji <33333
i fucking hate this man
this man tried to assassinate the king and failed
you disgrace me you should’ve killed him bro
wait nvm it was all part of the plan???
what the fuck omg
King Zhou: WHY WOULD MY WIFE CONSPIRE AGAINST ME
because you’ve ignored her for almost a year, mayhaps?
“Who has so shamelessly condemned this innocent woman?” Queen Jiang im so sorry but im a daji stan through and through, off with her head
daji about to pull an ultimate powermove i can feel it-
daji i dont trust like that
ma’am?
i dont have the words to describe this so uh placing this down here HAHA
King Zhou is a yes man for Daji and i cant even blame him right now
he still sucks
QUEEN JIANG CRYING
CONCUBINE HUANG CRYING
EVERYONE’S CRYING WHILE DAJI’S PROBABLY SITTING THERE SMILING WAITING FOR QUEEN JIANG TO GET TORTURED
god forbid women do anything smh
so they took one of Queen Jiang’s eyes
y’all will have to read this book yourselves lmao i am not sharing this scene
but it was good
anyways Daji wants to keep torturing her and King Zhou has an inkling of doubt on her for once
i doubt it will last tho
IT DID NOT FUCKING LAST LONG
OH MY GOD????
he has no spine
THEY FUCKING BURNED OFF HER HANDS????
MY FUCKING GOD
AND THE CHAPTER ENDS WITH DAJI SUGGESTING THEY BRING IN JIANG HUAN OKAY ALRIGHT GOOD IG
[.....]
CHAPTER 8 (PRINCES TAKE FLIGHT):
General Chao Tian and Chao Lei bring Jiang Huan to the west palace. yippe
Rip Queen jiang she only has one eye now
Queen Jiang: SAY YOU LIED Jiang Huan: but you ordered me to assassinate the King Queen Jiang: BITCH
HELP
Yin Jiao and Yin Hong playing chess…. free from guilt… not knowing whats about to happen lmao
Yin Jiao is fourteen and Yin Hong is.. two years his junior? So fourteen and twelve i think
no wonder theyre not paying attention
me too guys
YIN JIAO LET OUT A ROAR??? OK IG THEYRE RUNNING TO THE WEST PALACE TO SEE THEIR MOM
theyre crying now awesome
“I’ll cut off Daji’s head in revenge for my mother!” Yin Jiao buddy you’re like fourteen and you just kill your uncle- buddy n- oh boy
oh no nvm Yin Hong is sixteen then since they said Yin Jiao is too young to understa- yeah ok my bad
THE KING THINKS THEY WERE GOING TO KILL HIM LMAO NOOO
HE’S ORDERING THEM TO MURDER HIS SONS
QUEEN JIANG’S FUCKING DEAD?
WOW
OKAY NVM
RUNAWAY TEENAGERS LETS GOO
i would feel bad but i dont want to get attached i dont think children live long in these types of novels
HELLO?
CONCUBINE YANG FUCKING DID WHAT?
King Zhou: i wonder why she did that
BROTHER SHE WAS TERRIFIED YOU’D TORTURE HER
MFER JUST DOES NOT CARE HUH
still tries to kill his sons- im cdnsjkcndks
ERLANG PSPSPSPSPSPPSPS PLEASE I NEED SOMEONE TO COME BEAT THIS MAN UP
help is this why the war starts… because daji wanted queen jiang dead? damn
REBELLION REBELLION REBELLION
why does Huang Feihu have a rainbow ox
what
anyways
Fang Bi and Fang Xiang are taking the princes somewhere safe
BOTH THE PRINCES AND MARSHAL HUANG ON THEIR KNEES KNOWING THIS IS AWFUL AND WRONG BUT DAMN
NOT YIN JIAO SACRIFICNG HIMSELF SO HIS LITTLE BROTHER WILL LIVE AND RAISE AN ARMY AND SEEK REVENGE ON THEIR DAD
OUGH
ough,,,
E CHONGYU?
OH MARSHAL HUANG HAS AN IDEA
YES
YES THEY WILL ALL LIVE
SECRET BETWEEN ALL OF THEM HAHAHAHA
i already forgot who e chongyu was- wasnt he like….. hold on
no i forgot but it’s ok
Marshal Huang giving the boys his jade pendant with gold so they’ll be ok bc they have no money :( aw
Marshal Huang: yeah so i couldnt catch them idk where they went King Zhou: DAMN… it’s ok you can go now
UH OH DAJI HAS AN IDEA
Daji ily queen you go girl
ANYWAYS HUANG FEIHU ONLY SELECTINGT HE OLD AND WEAK SOLDIERS TO GO FIND THE PRINCES LMAO
why are you.. letting two little boys go off on their own
what is wrong with you people
THANK GOD YIN HONG GOT SOME FOOD FROM SOME NICE FOLK DANG
anyways onwards he goes to find E Chongyu
he collapsed at a temple… uh… yippee
SHANG RONG????
SHANG RONG!!!!!!
LETS FUCKING GOOOOO
Yin Pobai and Lei Kai are now in pursuit of the brothers,,, oh boy
chapter ends there aaaaaaa
[.....]
CHAPTER 9 (THE PRIME MINISTER'S DEATH):
ayo what the FUCK
yknow i wasnt going to comment but immediately the generals find the Temple of Emperor Xuanyuan where Yin Hong is sleeping and they find him LMAO
Yin Pobai arrives at Fengyun to talk to Shang Rong uh oh
GET HIS ASS SHANG RONG
also conspiring with shang rong would be the best thing imo
NOT THE BROTHERS REUNITING AND BASICALLY GOING “FUCK! NOW WE CAN’T AVENGE OUR MOM”
uh oh Huang Feihu’s mad-
OH LORD HES REALLY MAD OH NO
no one wants to execute the princes
im assuming a riot’s going to happen?
Daji said to execute the princes today and King Zhou agreed
yep riot i can feel it
JIANG ZIYA MENTION
I CANT BELIEVE SHANG RONG TOLD DAJI “KYS” IN HIS REPORT TO KING ZHOU
WOW
YEA NO WONDER YEAH UHM
shang rong you will always be famous
THATS WHERE IT ENDS? SHANG RONG DIES AND HIS BRAINS AND BLOOD DRIP DOWN THE COLLAR OF HIS ROBE….?
DAMN
MY GOD
OKAY...
[.....]
CHAPTER 10 (THE DISCOVERY OF THUNDERBOLT):
Zhao Qi angirly stepping out of the ranks to snap at King Zhou? uh oh
WHAT AN INSANE WAY TO START THIS CHAPTER MY GOD
WELL IG HES DEAD… HUH….
UHM…. DAMN….
“‘Have you any better means to deal with these stubborn jackasses?’ he asked Daji.”
uhm how about stop killing these men
also i can’t even entirely blame Daji for this she’s genuinely just carrying out orders from Nu Wa to ensure King Zhou is the downfall of the Shang Dynasty? She’s doing her job and it’s going ridiculously good and although a war’s coming… King Zhou is at fault for not listening to everyone that tells him he is being a bad king
YIPPEE SHES OFFICIALLY QUEEN DAJI NOW LETS GO
so hes going to behead the four dukes…. ok
WHY IS SAN YISHENG IN CHAGRE OF INTERNAL AFFAIRS NOOOO
Bo Yikao is a funky name i wonder what it means
Ji Chang’s son going in his place to King Zhou’s court… hmhm
THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN JI CHANG HAS NINETY-NINE SONS????????WHAT
“the star of a great warrior has come to existence” ji chang why do you speak in riddles
WHY ARE YOU ABANDONING A BABY SOBS
MASTER OF CLOUDS
his name will be thunderbolt…
so
like
like his name’s just lightning?
hm
ok well master of clouds have acquired a baby
oh boy the dukes are drinking
well E Chongyu’s drunk at least
HES INSULTING CHONG HOUHU NOOO
Ji Chang stopped Chong Houhu from slapping E Chongyu… damn
so close
JI CHANG SAID TO DECAPITATE EVERYONE SINCE NO ONES SPEAKING UP LMAO
YAO FU???
i have a character named Fu Yao that was wild
anyways
YAO FU TELLING EVERYONE ABOUT DAJI AND KING ZHOU AND HOW QUEEN JIANG DIED
oh shit Jiang Huanchu’s her dad right
uh oh
HE FAINTED
Jiang Huanchu: MY DAUGHTER IS DEAD… MY DEAR DAUGHTER…. HOW HORRIBLY YOU MUST HAVE SUFFERED!
i like this guy
hes just sad over his daughrer dying ough :(
aaaaand King Zhou is killing everyone ok
THATS IT… HE JUST.. GETS ANGRY AT JI CHANG FOR SPEAKING UP AND THE NSAYS HE’LL KILL ALL FOUR DUKES
wild
can’t wait to read chapters 11 - 20
#live rhyactions#fsyy reading#long post#uhm#chapters 1-10 were insane and very good ngl but also uh#what the fuck was chapter 10... ngl...#its insane /pos#SO WAS CHAPTER 9 TBH#if i ever watch a movie about this novel it better include shang rong
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🎵🎵🎵 Album tag game 🎵🎵🎵
rules: share the albums that you can listen to nonstop. those lightning in a bottle-albums that scratch ur brain just right. every single track, an absolute banger. u could not skip one if u tried. no notes. stunning, show-stopping, immaculate. ur no-skip albums.
🔎 bonus & optional (but imo, v fun) rules: 1) add a track rec for us to listen to! AND 2) share ur favorite line(s) from that track! 👀
Now lowkey I'm cheating here because I don't really listen to albums in full and I would probably would skip at max like one song on each of these albums but I wanna participate in the game so I make the rules.
ANYWAYS thank you @bluecoolr for the tag
I will Tag @probably-a-plant-thing @bobeatspie300 @thelemoncoffee @boxtyphoon @toborusk and a cover all if you wanna do it do it!! Also these are all very low no pressure tags.
Billie Ellish- When We All Fall Asleep, Where Do We All Do?
Penelope Scott-Public Void
Mother Mother-Inside
Chonny Jash-The Will Wood Power Hour
Eliza Anastasic-The Grand Relics
Billie was my number one artist on Spotify for like 2 or 3 years in a row and she hasn't left my top 5 since I started listening to her. I fucking LOVE ilomilo
Lyrics: So, where did you go? I should know, but it's cold And I don't wanna be lonely So tell me you'll come home Even if it's just a lie
The fact I get all my music from Tiktok is showing ANYWAYS Penelope Scott has some bangin ass music. I actually associate this song with Steven, and if Bob is down and people are interested I can totally go into why.
Lyrics:You fuckers know it's all built on lies But the beast refuses to die And so I guess well neither can I
Mother Mother is the most basic gay people music but DO I CARE??? NOOOOO!!!!! I can and will add both Haylofts into Oc Playlists! Anyways this bitch got a funky rhythm and I like the way they sing. Also this is probably the album with the most skips but I make the rules I don't care I'mma put it anyways
Lyrics: I'm thinking, "Oh, my God, what a chatty creature" It just kept talking and talking and talking all around in a circle I said, "Hey, little guy, I think it's time to go now"
CHONNY I AM GONNA KISS YOU SO HARD OH MY GOD. YOU, ONE OF MY FAVORITE ARTISTS, COVERING WILL WOOD??? MY OTHER TOP ARTIST. I AM CRAZY AND DERANGED
Now I do think you should listen to both versions of Thermodynamic Lawyer but I really like the lyric changes Chonny does so do whatever you want.
Lyrics:He'll rationalize rhymes 'til the T's and the I's Are re-crossed and re-dotted to a blur Blacks out his eyes, hides the lines, flays his thighs 'Til the-, they think that "he" is their "her"
Ok ok now hear me out. Hear me out here I know it's fucking weird but listen to me. Hear me the fuck out.
This is a fan-Album based on the Podcast The Adventure Zone Balance. Everyone should listen to Balance. It's a funny DND podcast. It is earnest, and stupid and funny and it has made me cry and if you don't have 69 hours to throw to this podcast (with the first 6 episodes being a bit rough as it's their first time playing) I HIGHLY recommend listening to their Current Arc: Vs Dracula. They all know what they're doing and they're doing it hilariously
Rant over. These songs are based on 7 magical objects that are collected by our main characters. These songs also include some clips from the podcast. I'm gonna rec the first one because its the least spoiler-y.
Lyrics: I'm a weapon of mass destruction That can literally fit on your hand So what are you waiting for? I'm thralling as hard as I can Go ahead and put me on- Gloves do not have long attention spans!
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Hi hello I know we've literally just met this very moment but please tell me everything there is to know about your isat OC, I crave knowledge.
HWIWHSIWHEKWNS HI OK !!! This’ll be extremely scattered tho so be warned
Also sorry this took so long 😭😭 i was havin a day yesterday lmao
(Full game spoilers under cut)
So!!! Lorenzo Silvana Halloran ! He/him pronouns, Scissors/Rock dual type with the title of The Performer. He’s 22, half portian and half islander. (Mom was Portian, dad was an islander)
Starting w backstory stuff: When the Country disappeared, he was only 12. He washed up on some random beach with only some tattered clothes, a notebook and a small ring. He stayed with his mom for a little while though left to venture on his own at 14 bc she actually sucks and is terrible.
Living in Portia, he’d grown fond of live performances of all kinds. Music, plays, comedy shows, etc. He ended up doing a few of his own and building somewhat of a name for himself. It became a fine source of money for him.
Isabeau and Mirabelle heard about him a little after Isabeau joined. He’d tagged along for navigation to find the second orb and greatly impressed the two with his skills and he joined ! (After getting proper clothes bc the only fitting ones he had were. Performance clothes and coverups plus one other set of clothes)
Ok !! Now onto everything else
Nicknames, others to him-
Mirabelle -> Renzo
Isabeau -> Renz, Enzy
Odile -> Lorenzo
Siffrin -> Zo, Renzo, Enzy
Bonnie -> Zo/Zozo, Loren (he absolutely hates this. Bonnie thinks it’s hysterical)
He heavily prefers Renzo over Lorenzo, as his full name always feels too formal to him.
Nicknames, him to others-
Mirabelle -> Mira, Belle
Isabeau -> Beau, Ibabeau (hot stuff)
Odile -> D, Odile (shes intimidating leave him alone)
Siffrin -> Siffs, Rinrin, (pretty)
Bonnie -> Bons, Bonbon, Kid/Kiddo
He’s incredibly kind, though a little obnoxious and incredibly closed off. He doesn’t really know how to be super genuine without being incredibly uncomfortable. Also doesn’t ever show fear ever at all. Never he’d rather die.
He hates any blood in large amounts not his own. Hates it. Not a phobia, but it makes him freeze up completely. He didn’t do that good when Siffrin lost his eye. That was the very first time they all saw Renzo actually scared ! Like visibly shaken ! He never did it again tho
He loves puns. Him and siffrin are an absolute fucking nightmare together
His hair is naturally darkless, but he dyes it a vast number of shades. It’s fun and covers up his grays (yes he has grays at 22. Genetics <\3)
He’s the tallest party member ! 6’1 without heels
He used Craft to alter his teeth, which are pointy as hell now, and his vocal chords, so he can hit ridiculous notes he really shouldn’t be able to hit.
His accent is a fucking mess. Similar to Siffrin’s, but mixed with both Vaugardian and Portian.
He really wants to craft more ridiculous stuff onto his body (like pointy ears n shit) but doesn’t. Remember how to do body craft. So he needs to re-learn (from isabeau hehehe)
He loves chocolate, but would only try super weird flavors if Siffrin was doing it with him
Chatty drunk. Absolutely will never shut the fuck up
Has called Odile “mom” on more than one occasion.
He sleeps on the floor bc he can’t fit on the clocktower beds 😞😞 leg too big
Haven’t exactly decided on weapons yet but his weapon will either be an old modified guitar that literally couldn’t play anymore OR these
Thats all for now, but i’m absolutely adding more as i figure out more abt him. Official Renzo info post
#im def gonna add to this in reblogs n shit in the future so. watch out#tysm for letting me scream about my son i love him sm#in stars and time#isat#isat spoilers#in stars and time spoilers#lorenzo halloran#isat oc#in stars and time oc#official renzo post#answered asks
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As promised, here’s the second half of my random thoughts and observations about Desire Catcher now that I’ve finished my latest rewatch (links aren’t working for me right now, but if you want to read the first half just click on one of the tags on this post and it should come up easily). The entire series is 24 episodes, most of which are somewhere between 35 and 45 minutes long - so, depending on what types of shows you usually watch, it might be a bit of a commitment. But I definitely think it’s worth it.
OK, time to brace yourself, as there’s a lot going on in this second part…
At the halfway mark the relationship between Luo Fei and Lu Fengping is starting to fray (oh look, it's my good friend angst again) - essentially, Lu Fengping is frustrated that his mom’s murder remains unsolved and Luo Fei hasn’t given him much in the way of clues like he was supposed to. Lu Fengping ends up working with the main villain (Bai Ya Xing), who is behind all of the crimes/murders that have been happening, to find his mom’s killer and get revenge. (I won’t spoil the details, but I will say that this particular storyline could probably have used some fleshing out, as the details and motivations don’t quite come together in the end. As I’ve noted before, the real draw with Desire Catcher is the relationships, so you can kind of wave those plot holes away - unless that sort of thing really bothers you, which I totally get.)
There’s a bit of a cat-and-mouse game going on throughout the middle episodes, with Lu Fengping getting more cagey and Luo Fei chasing after him a bit, attempting to figure out what he’s hiding. You get Luo Fei trying to casually inquire with multiple people as to Lu Fengping’s whereabouts when he’s gone for no more than a couple of hours at a time (we get it bro, you’re obsessed), not to mention lurking in the shadows near his apartment at night (yikes, dude). During this period there are definitely times when Lu Fengping looks almost guilty for pulling away and for what he’s planning to do, like he wants to confide in Luo Fei but he can’t - there’s a particular wistfulness to his expressions that’s so on point and gets me every time.
One nice little touch throughout is the many dinner dates the two leads go on - granted, one ends with Luo Fei leaving before they even eat anything, and another has him answering Lu Fengping’s question “Does everyone look like a suspect to you?” with “Yes - you look like one too,” so not exactly the most romantic situations (social skills are not Luo Fei’s strong point). But I am a sucker for those little intimate moments - misty evenings with blurry streetlights, tables piled high with steaming dishes and clinking glasses, the muted conversations of the people around them - and of course the sharing food = love symbolism.
Speaking of tropes, if you’re a fan of jealousy, then DC has got you covered. Again, no big plot spoilers here but Luo Fei finds out Lu Fengping has brought a girl home one night - not for the reason he (or anyone else) thinks, but you can tell he’s in his feelings about it (and Lu Fengping, I love you, but maybe in the future do not kidnap a stranger - even if you had your reasons and you were sort of helping her in the moment). He ends up getting arrested (twice!) for the abduction and when Luo Fei fails to help him, their “big breakup” begins in earnest - Lu Fengping saying “I shouldn’t have counted on you right from the start” got me right in the heart, ngl.
*Books as symbolism alert* - we get just one shot of some books strewn around Lu Fengping’s apartment in the second half, but I did find it interesting that the subtitles call out two of them specifically, which feels important. Those are “The Sea, The Sea” by Iris Murdoch and “It Takes More Than A Carrot And A Stick” by Wess Roberts. The former is about love and loss and romantic ideals by an author known for writing about morality and the power of the unconscious - things that seem relevant to a hypnotist, I would think. The latter actually made me laugh audibly when I noticed the subtitle: “Practical Ways Of Getting Along With People You Can’t Avoid At Work.” Sounds about right for them.
Here’s another alert - BIG GIANT SPOILERS AHEAD!! Click below with caution…
OK, so the big event of the second half is Lu Fengping faking his death(!!) in order to give him the time and space away from Luo Fei/the police to move ahead with his revenge plan. Long story short, Luo Fei thinks Lu Fengping has blown himself up, goes through the five stages of grief, figures out he’s still alive and somehow manages to be like, “Hey, thought you were dead but no biggie - let’s not even hug it out and instead just go right back to teasing each other and solving crimes - it’s all good.” Honestly, I’m glossing over a lot here - how absolutely devastated Luo Fei (and everyone else, for that matter) is when he thinks Lu Fengping is dead, how they finally yell a bit about their feelings and come clean about certain things when they reunite, how the OST rips your heart out again and again in these moments (“Did we meet just to be torn apart?” - I mean, come on), how relieved Lu Fengping looks when he realizes that Luo Fei doesn’t hate him for what he did, how Luo Fei suddenly can’t stop smiling (you’ve come a long way, baby). I think these are probably some of the strongest scenes in the entire show, but I must admit that the way they don’t truly address the fallout of something this intense still bugs me (stay tuned for a fic I’m writing on that very topic, in case that sort of thing interests you - and @thinkonce-acttwice, I ✨promise✨ I’m actually working on it!).
I know I haven’t mentioned Liang Yin in this second-half review yet - what happened/happens to her still plays a major role in the story of Lu Fengping’s mom’s death. I won’t give the details here, but do note that there are some flashback scenes of her getting attacked that might be rough for some viewers - so please keep that in mind. However, aside from a couple of moments where the men in her life feel the need to protect/shelter her despite her being quite capable of handling things herself, I will say that the story gives her back some agency, and it does feel as if by the end she’s come to terms with her past and is in a good place overall. And the relationship between her, Luo Fei, and Lu Fengping gets a really nice resolution - a sort of found family thing that brings them all together.
There’s lots of plot movement as we work our way through the final episodes - the big bad villain is vilaining, there’s an evil nurse who’s in on the shenanigans, poor Professor Ling (Lu Fengping’s mentor and fellow hypnotist) gets accused of being a fraud and ends up in the hospital, Lu Fengping almost stabs himself in the heart while hypnotized by Bai Ya Xing (though of course Luo Fei shows up in the nick of time to save him - I swear, despite knowing that this is just a “bromance” show, every time I watch that scene there’s one split second where it seems like they’re about to lean in and kiss - oof), poor Liang Yin gets kidnapped by the big bad villain (unfortunately, more “man pain”). I tell you, this show is a roller coaster ride every freaking episode.
I won’t spoil the final ending too much, but rest assured Liang Yin is fine. Stuff happens, Lu Fengping ends up in prison - though he sort of puts himself there on purpose, sacrificing himself for Luo Fei, even if he doesn’t come out and say that’s what he’s doing. And he basically gets a form of justice for his mom’s death. The very last bit sees him return from prison on parole - he reunites with the police team and Luo Fei in a slightly cheesy but rather touching moment, though, again, even just a quick hug would’ve been nice…
Bottom line, I love all of them, your honor, and will probably never be over this show - there’s so much to unpack in terms of the role of fate in our lives, how broken people can find something in each other to live for, how to forgive others and, importantly, yourself.
OK, again, this one got away from me, and I know I’m probably forgetting like a million little things, but hopefully I’ve managed to entertain at least one other person with my ramblings. And if anything here has sounded intriguing, please check this little show out so it gets the love it deserves! 🖤
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Spoiler Review of S4 Episode One
Ok so I gave a non spoiler review of episodes 1-3 buuuut it is now time for the spoilers I will be tagging these so no one who does not want to see them will. If somehow, you are reading this part, please please please be aware that from this sentence forward there are spoilers for season four episode 1 of The Chosen. Ok? Ok.
…
Episode One:
Ok so literally episode one John the Baptist is martyred. And it is breathtakingly beautiful. The dancer who played Salome was phenomenal, I don’t think she had a single line, her whole thing was practicing and performing the dance which I feel like really shows how this was all Herodias’ idea and she was really just a pawn. At the same time, we flashback to young Mother Mary visiting Elizabeth and Zechariah, which was funny and sweet and so heartwarming. It really is odd to see a woman clearly in her 70s or even 80s pregnant but knowing the story it just made me so happy. We also see Joanna going to tell the disciples and Jesus about John. It’s all intercut between Zechariah’s prophecy about John as a baby, the party, Joanna, and the actual death of John. The scene of the execution is somehow beautiful even as we know something horrible is happening. As John is being led away, he quotes what Jesus had his disciples tell him, “The lame walk, the blind see, the dead are raised,” and he says, “The way of the Lord is prepared.” Which just sent shivers down my spine. We see the silver platter John’s head will be served on and the soldier says that usually it’s used for a wedding banquet to which John says, “I’ve never been to a wedding banquet, but I’m going to one.” Which again, I’m just sobbing at this point. Right as John is about to die, he looks out a window and sees a spotless lamb feeding outside, like a final sign that his mission is fulfilled. Obviously we don’t see a severed head, but the swing of the axe is just as impactful. We cut to Jesus by himself, as if already preparing for the news. When he is told, we see him mourn. Rip his clothes, and cover himself in dirt. It’s heartbreaking to say the least. Also, it is important to note that Ramah returns and everyone is gathering together. Then, we see Joanna arrive and tell Andrew, and then everyone else. The last thing we see is Jesus approaching the group, torn clothes, dirt on his face, looking…disillusioned? It’s hard to describe it. Almost like he’s been too emotionally exhausted to have a readable expression.
Another thing to note, was that Zebeddee and sons have the olive oil ready and are giving it to the local synagogue for ritual purposes. Yousef says it is to benefit local enterprise, but Rabbi Akira is skeptical. Tamar goes with them but is not allowed in the synagogues being both a woman and a Gentile, obviously upsetting her. (Big James offers to stay with her instead of going in!!!!!!! The ship is real!!!!!)
Oh and I just remembered that Salome did have a line and it was just to say, “Anything?” When Herod says he’ll give her anything after the dance.
The interweaving of baby John and John’s execution was beautifully done. I was sobbing. The moment Zechariah can speak again, he begins prophesying and we hear it over John being led in by the soldiers. I like that John seemed nervous (as obviously anyone would be) but he wasn’t necessarily scared. It was that last moment of seeing the lamb that made him smile just as he died. Oh wow like I said I was crying.
It’s also incredibly hard to watch Jesus cry. I expected it to be, but obviously being a Christian and a follower of Jesus makes it so much harder. Especially after the love and laughter we’ve seen him experience as well. They do not shy away from humanity and that is such a welcomed thing.
Episode One was expected, but still managed to be utterly brilliant in writing and storytelling. We all knew John’s death was coming and it was made into a realistically sorrowful but beautiful reality. I cannot wait until I have it at my fingertips to watch again and again.
So that was episode one. Episode two coming soon!
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