#oh you know exactly what this is going to be

[angelsforthenight]

screen babe, mean babe, guess who’s gonna cream babe! (pt 2)

camgirl!vi x reader (read pt 1 here)

summary: after an abysmal night, you know who PinkSage really is. you want to loathe her, yet you can’t seem to escape vi’s agonising game, especially underneath the guttural heat of your city’s sun.

pre a/n: yaaawl if ur expecting smut in this chapter then i’m sorry but not yet 🙁🙁 i want to drag s.m.g out longer than i did with my last ellie series so you’re gonna have to wait until the next chapter. sometimes a slow burn can be so much better and worth it in the end, i promise! hope you guys still enjoy <3

content: AAAANGST, vi is really mean, very slight slut-shaming, cursing, crying, playful!vi, teasing! this entire chapter is a huge tease, vi is extroverted, difficult goddamn lesbians, some painful yearning, some cute moments, vi’s got one point up in this chap but we’ll see how that’ll go…

“i know who you are.”

your eyes persist in hers: as if trying to burrow yourself inside them and make yourself known.

vi, irritated as is, raises her brows and shakes her head; urging for you to elaborate. you have no idea where your boldness came from, but you find yourself continuing.

“PinkSage. y-you’re PinkSage, i watch you all the time i—“ vi’s face does a whole u-turn, the colour draining from her face.

“hold on, shut the fucking door first!” she hisses frantically. you flinch into obeying her. when you turn back around, your heart sinks at the disgusted look on vi’s face. maybe you hadn’t thought this one through.

“the fuck were you thinking? saying that shit whilst your parents are sleeping right there?” she whisper-scolds, storming towards you. you back away until you’re up against your door. yeah… what exactly were you thinking was going to happen? for your favourite cam-girl to immediately get on her knees and start eating you out? of course this moment hadn’t gone as you expected.

“huh? you just gonna stand there like a dumbass after revealing that shit? you of all people?” vi continues, her voice raising. she’s so enraged! as if it’s your fault that the woman you’re supposed to idolise happened to stay in your house. it’s only a fucked-up coincidence. your lips quiver as you find your voice.

“you— you’re being too loud.” are the only words that you can think of to say. vi stares at you in disbelief.

“… my parents are sleeping after all, right?” you mutter, looking away. vi is scowling so much she may as well pop a vein.

“hah. you’re a sick fucking freak.” she laughs dryly, shaking her head incredulously. though your gaze flicks up to her; bewildered and hurt, you’re not just going to let her talk down on you like this. not when what vi does is worse.

“you spread your legs for, like, a million pervs online. i don’t think you have the right to talk.” you snap whilst your voice trembles. here’s to thinking the world of PinkSage…

“pervs including your dull ass.” vi scoffs.

“watch your mouth, unless you’d like to sleep in the streets.”

“oh yeah? and what would you explain to your parents?” vi’s lips twitch into a grin, “mommy, daddy! kick vi out because i jerk off to her online but she’s being mean to me in real life!” she mocks, her voice lilting into a higher-pitched tone. your instinct is to push her in order to shut her mouth. vi only stumbles a little, but she glares at you as if you’ve thrown tomato juice all over her white top.

“fuck you.” you’re about to leave until something comes over you, feeling compelled to say one last thing. let her sit with this shit.

“and for your information, last time you streamed? you orgasmed to my name. your_user? yeah, that was me.”

you relish in the way vi’s expression mellows into one of astonishment. she’s dumbfounded and silent.

“sleep with that, bitch.” you spit, hastily slipping back to your room. you would’ve slammed the door if it wasn’t going to wake your parents up. your mother sleeps with one eye open and any noise would have her rising from her bed as if she’s a vampire.

once you make it back to your room, you let out a breath you didn’t even know you were holding. you’re trembling: entire body buzzing from head to toe with adrenaline and fury.

two steps closer to your bed and you feel a glob of tears swell in your throat, shooting up to your eyes. they are quick to rivulet down your cheeks like a torrent, and you intake a shuddering breath, coated with phlegm. afraid of vi hearing you next door, you immediately cover your mouth.

you jump into your bed, too arrogant to admit that the reason why you’re sobbing in your pillow is because you’re upset. you’re fucking pissed is what you are, embarrassed that you even said anything — and that vi had the gall to respond like that. whereas a week ago you would’ve praised PinkSage as if she were a saint, you’re sitting here wondering who the fuck this woman thinks she is.

of course famous people are dickheads in real life. you should’ve expected this. you fiercely wipe your tears, yanking your covers over your head. at least you were able to have the last word. you think about the look on her face, hoping she feels just as stupid as you do.

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁

it’s the morning that’s downright awful. you woke up too early, and now you’re forced out of your will to sit with your family and vi to eat breakfast.

your parents are trying so hard to impress her and you hate it. they’ve even gone the extra length of setting a table in your backyard, spread neatly over the stone ground. you don’t remember there being this much food in your house, let alone the gingham cloth fanned over the table. as if this breakfast is a special occasion. they must think vi is a goddamn prodigy! they find it to be groundbreaking how can she be oh so sweet volunteering for animals and taking care of them, and how she works out a lot and that tattoo on her face…

you chew your food slowly, glaring daggers at her as she compliments your mother’s cooking with her mouth full. meanwhile you would’ve gotten scolded for doing that! you’re being petty and stifling: insanely moody in this delicate summer morning. how could you not? you were in tears because of her audacity last night!

you bet if your parents found out what vi really does, your dad wouldn’t suggest playing basketball with her, and your mother wouldn’t be asking her all these stupid, prodding questions. ones like, “vi, do you have a boyfriend? o-or a girlfriend! if that’s what you prefer?”

you two make eye contact then. a split second, but it was palpable like an electric current zipping up your spine. you’re the first to look away; suddenly interested in swirling your fried egg around, smearing the yolk.

“nah. not interested in that stuff.” she replies dismissively, cool as a cucumber, because everything about her is cool! peachy! you prick your bacon with your fork hard, bringing it up to your lips as you flicker a glance at vi once more. since she’s not paying attention anymore, your eyes decide to fixate on the slope of her nose, shimmering from the light mixed with shadows that are dancing from the leaves above.

vi mutters something indignantly to your father, something you don’t hear because she suddenly steps on your foot under the table. hard. you accidentally let out a gasp that’s a little too loud, obliging everyone else to stop what they’re doing to glance up at you. they definitely forgot that you were even here. you glare at vi, who’s looking away as if she hadn’t just done that on purpose. are we suddenly little kids now? did she wake up completely overturned? ready to be an upbeat ray of sunshine after rudely shutting you down last night?

“everything okay?” dad raises a brow. vi only pretends to be curious, furrowing her brows and pouting, a faint jeering expression for your eyes only. what is she trying to play at? this isn’t just mere playfulness. this is something else.

“yeah, fine.” you murmur. you’re ready to push your chair back and leave until you hear your mother.

“oh, y/n can take you. she knows her way around the area better than any of us.” you freeze.

“what?” you brow quirks into a look of foul disdain. especially because vi looks like a grinning dog at your mother’s suggestion.

“you guys can even take the bikes!” dad chimes in enthusiastically. you want the skies above to open up and take you away. right here, right now.

“but—“

“i would love to go with you.” vi beams. that wretched look on her face, full of mischief and lies. the sun on her face isn’t exactly helping either. it’s all a cruel taunt: the way it kisses her face, the way it highlights her plush lips curved into that sweet, deceitful smile. she could be the sun herself… if she wasn’t so obnoxious. yet you find yourself relenting, giving a speck of yourself away to the woman who gets under your skin. you force yourself to stare at the wooden ridges of the table instead of the sunlight dancing on vi’s features.

“…fine. where to?”

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁

the lazy july sun is beating down on you mercilessly. vi’s wearing a baseball cap, but you? you were too pissed off and stubborn to listen to your mother’s advice on wearing a hat. so now you’re suffering.

you’re steering down the tree-lined dirt track with your bike. though it’s so damn hot, you really do appreciate the beauty that summer brings along: how everything appears so bright and awake. you won’t pretend that it can’t be suffocating however, especially when you have a certain pink-haired someone riding a bike behind you, distinctly aware of her eyes boring down your back.

vi slightly quickens so she’s right beside you, you side-eye her.

“who says that theres space for the both of us?” your words may as well have a double meaning. vi grins. there is actually enough space, you just don’t want her next to you.

“i did. you’re so sweaty you’re glowing by the way.”

“aw, thank you.” you sneer at her before picking up the pace.

“hey, wait! i was fucking around!” she chuckles, following you down the road.

you guys ride until you’re in the city: bustling with people and markets. mothers are dragging their screaming kids, men are oozing with sweat; grumbling as they push past people. you’re jealous of those passing by that are able to fan their faces. vi parks her bike, but you don’t.

“well, it has been lovely escorting you.” you mutter sarcastically, gripping the handlebars.

“what? you’re not staying? what makes you think i know my way around?” vi counters. she looks so puzzled, like a puppy. you swallow, seeming to crumble just a little more when you look at her face for too long.

“um, i didn’t know you wanted a tour… but fine.”

you two walk along the markets. vi has quite some time before she’s called in for work so she wanted to familiarise herself with the city beforehand. at first, you guys hardly talk, simply following vi as she wanders about instead: watching as her eyes glint at the vintage trinkets and antiques they sell in stalls.

you feel like a clamshell stalling quietly behind her, as she eagerly chats with quite literally anyone. she’s so extroverted! it’s begrudgingly interesting watching her communicate, her delivery of words smooth and clear, making anyone hang onto her words like rope.

there’s too many people in this narrow path, and too much pushing. you don’t want to lose yourself in the crowd, so you helplessly tug on vi’s sleeve. vi glances back.

“you good?” she keeps walking with you continuing to use her sleeve as leverage. it’d be a mess if you guys were to randomly stop now, with this sea of people that have clearly got places to be.

“yeah, i just don’t wanna lose you.” you reply, realising too late how weird that just sounded. vi, jovial as she already has been, only smiles wider. you quickly back-pedal.

“m-my parents would kill me if i were to lose our guest, you know?”

“here.” you all but expected for vi to lace her fingers into yours, holding your hand as you continue to slink through the masses of people. why is she being like this? was last night completely erased from her head, or does she just not care that much? you stare at the back of her head, as if that’ll give you answers. you secretly enjoy the warmth of her hand, subtly pressing your palm further into hers. vi doesn’t notice. good.

you guys find yourself in a music shop. this, after all the other markets and shops you’ve visited, finally has captured your keen interest. you come here all the time, the main source of all your cds in your room.

your eyes sparkle when your fingers stumble across one you’ve always wanted. limited edition, and it has a holographic cover too! how sick is that?

however, the excitement quickly fades when you remember that because you were stuck in your cloud of fitful anger, you ended up forgetting your wallet at home. you palm your pockets, making sure it miraculously doesn’t just so happen to be there… but nope. nothing.

“boo.” you feel the hotness of her mouth hard by your ear before you even register anything else. you squirm away, glowering at her only to be met with a cheeky smile back. vi’s already got a whole bag of stuff! how nice that must be.

“you gonna buy that?” vi points her gaze at the cd in your hands. you slot it back in the genre section. “i don’t have money, left it at home.” you mumble.

vi snorts, “you’re a real smart one, ain’t ya?”

“shut up. go pay for that and i’ll wait outside.” you grumble, practically storming out the door. you’ve never met anyone quite like vi. she’s so playful, and stupid and sweet, hot and mean all at the same time: getting under your skin in the worst way imaginable. the memory of PinkSage feels like it’s slipping from your fingers like sand.

vi comes back a moment later, smacking a cd down in your hands and walking ahead like nothing happened. you stare at her confusedly, but your eyebrows quickly rest in realisation as you gaze down at the cd. it’s the same one you wanted. your stomach betrays you by fluttering and then churning intensely.

“hey.” you call out, making vi stop.

“what’s your deal? why’d you buy this for me?” you grip the cd, heart beating like a live wire. vi turns around and walks closer to you. branches are singing from the breeze, seagulls are cawing, but you can’t hear anything. not when your full focus is on her. not when she’s walking so close it’s as if she’s going to step right through you.

“‘cause i saw how much you wanted it. you were gleaming.” she shrugs. how casual she must be, whilst your heart is pounding to the rhythm of her syllables. vi-o-let. why must you treat me this way?

“it’s no big deal.” she stares at you blankly up and down. you point your view downwards, focusing on the ladybug that’s started to crawl on your shoe. a kind respite from vi’s torturous gaze.

“why… why are you being so nice? after wh-what happened last night?” curse your sudden nervousness.

vi might as well close the gap between the pair of you, gentle fingers tilting your chin up to direct your gaze on her. oh, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you.

“because you’re my biggest fan.” vi stretches out her words, soft and punishing. this godforsaken woman… you could quite literally die on her feet. your brain short-circuits and then switches off. especially when you witness vi’s gaze flickering to your lips. your breathing quickens, and it feels like your body isn’t yours anymore. you may as well be a floating bubble.

until vi takes her hat off and puts it on your head instead, patting it. “come on, let’s skedaddle. you don’t think our bikes got stolen, do you?” she jogs ahead, whilst you stand here like a dumbass, the cd lying limply in your hands.

this is a brutal penance worser than last night. vi did that on purpose, to see your reaction, and now that she’s got her fill, she’s going back to pretending as if nothing happened. how unsparing. how cruel.

you force yourself to drag your feet, one feet after the other towards vi. your head is lagging behind, still stuck on her touch.

a/n: some of u might hate me for this 😅😅👅👅👅 but oh my god u guys are in a DOOZY for chapter three i’m literally trembling thinking about writing it ughhhfhdhhd once again lmk if u wanna be added to the taglist but also some of u guys need to check that ur mentions are on or else i can’t tag! :< anywhooo sorry that this chapter was a little shorter but did anyone else clock the cmbyn tea…

taglist: @marvelwomenarehot0 @ghgygd @jupitism @reneesub @cotrill09 @itzsky82 @elliesbabygirl @adora-moonshine @maxinephobia @ch3sire-blu3 @krilara @perrzs @thankynext @zaunite-516 @eren-luvr @cpt-prices-leftnipple @goticapomposa @lolitalovess @moonchildcovenxx @spicedcherrylolli @mystar-girl57 @mar1posita @avonnimimi @kirajess @caitvisgirl @heyy-lovey @antobooh @jajsnjz @beachaddict48 @aceywaycy @sleepingwasp @elliezlils11utt @vincinnamontoast @runawaybaby3 @h0n3yf0rlif3 @iluvwomensm

[reiding-writing]

Heyy!! i was wondering if you could perchance do a drabble with dad!spencer and mom!bau!reader where they've gotten into the rhythm of calling each other mommy and daddy in front of the kids and one of them accidentally slips up and does it work without realising. And then the team is like "hold on 🤨" (probably morgan) and they have to defend themselves. Just something i've been thinking about and i don't have the artistic ability to right it myself but you do! Thank youuuu! xxx

SLIP UP. /spencer reid/

your at-home naming habits find their way into the office.

bau!mom!reader 1.1k fluff masterlist.

a/n | this is so funny i love it.

The bullpen hums with its usual energy—phones ringing, keyboards clacking, conversations weaving through the space.

It’s late, and exhaustion weighs on everyone like a heavy fog. Cases have been stacking up, the paperwork never-ending, and you’re all running on caffeine and whatever sugar-laden snack Garcia has left in the breakroom.

You and Spencer, despite being used to sleepless nights—courtesy of two small children at home—are still feeling the burn.

Parenting while profiling is a delicate balance, and some days, it feels like you barely hold it together. But you've found ways to cope, to slip into a rhythm that works.

Spencer leans over his desk, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose as he scans a report. His hair is slightly disheveled—likely from running his hands through it—and his tie is loosened, his sleeves rolled up. He looks exactly how you feel, drained.

You, seated across from him, are going through another file when you sigh and reach for the next document. “Pass Mommy the file, please,”

The moment the words leave your mouth, the bullpen stills. For a brief second, no one reacts. Not even Spencer, who doesn’t hesitate to slide the file over to you, his tired brain not even registering what just happened.

But then—

“Hold on, what?”

Your head snaps up so fast you nearly give yourself whiplash. Across the table, Morgan is staring at you with wide eyes, a slow, knowing smirk spreading across his face. JJ’s eyebrows are raised nearly to her hairline, and even Rossi has paused his paperwork, looking mildly amused.

Hotch looks like he’s trying very hard not to react.

You glance at Spencer, who is blinking rapidly, his brain trying to catch up with what just happened.

And then, it hits you.

“Oh my God.” Your stomach drops. Heat rushes to your face. “I didn’t mean—”

Morgan leans forward, elbows on the table, his smirk growing. “Did you just refer to yourself as Mommy?”

Spencer makes a strangled noise in the back of his throat. “It’s— It’s not—”

“Because I swear I just heard that,” Morgan continues, clearly enjoying himself.

JJ covers her mouth, eyes twinkling with suppressed laughter.

You groan, dropping your face into your hands. “It’s not what you think,”

“Oh, I think it’s exactly what I think.” Morgan chuckles, leaning back in his chair. “Reid, you calling her Mommy at home?”

Spencer makes another choked noise, shaking his head furiously. “No! I mean— yes, but not like that!”

JJ snorts, and even Hotch finally cracks, pinching the bridge of his nose like he’s debating whether or not to intervene.

You lift your head, groaning again. “We have two kids under four. There’s a lot of third-person referencing, okay?”

Morgan raises an eyebrow, amused.

Spencer, still red-faced, starts rambling. “It’s a psychological phenomenon, actually. When individuals—particularly parents—are frequently addressed in a particular way, their brains develop an associative response, reinforcing the use of the terms even in situations outside the expected context. It’s entirely innocent. Just an unconscious linguistic habit.”

Morgan whistles low. “Damn, Pretty Boy. You really just tried to profile your way out of calling your wife ‘Mommy’ in front of us,”

Spencer groans, burying his face in his hands.

Your face feels impossibly warm. “We’re tired, Morgan. We haven’t had a full night’s sleep in—” You glance at Spencer. “How long has it been?”

“Three years, three months, and sixteen days,” he answers automatically.

Morgan lets out a low whistle. “Damn,”

Emily places a hand over her heart. “That’s actually kind of adorable,”

Garcia practically vibrates with excitement. “This is the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I need to hear more,”

“There’s nothing more to hear,” Spencer says, shaking his head quickly. “It’s just a habit. Strictly innocent,”

“Oh, we believe you,” Rossi says, the corners of his mouth twitching. “That doesn’t mean we’re going to let it go,”

“Not a chance,” Morgan agrees.

You groan, dropping your head into your hands. “This is never going away, is it?”

“Nope,” JJ says cheerfully.

Spencer sighs, rubbing his temples. “Great.”

And just like that, the teasing begins.

For the rest of the day—and likely for weeks to come—you hear variations of:

“Daddy, can you pass me that report?” from Emily.

“I don’t know, Mommy, what do you think?” from Morgan.

Garcia, of course, takes it the farthest, occasionally referring to you both as “Mommy and Daddy dearest,” complete with exaggerated winks.

By the time you make it home that evening, you collapse onto the couch with a groan, Spencer falling beside you.

“I’m never going to live this down,” you mumble.

“At least they think it’s funny,” Spencer says, leaning his head back against the cushions.

You sigh. “This is your fault,”

He turns his head to look at you, eyebrows raised. “My fault?”

“You didn’t even hesitate when I said it. You just handed me the file like it was totally normal,”

His lips twitch. “To be fair, it is normal,”

You nudge him with your foot. “Not at work, it isn’t,”

He chuckles, then tilts his head, considering. “Maybe if we just… pretend it never happened, they’ll drop it,”

You snort. “You really think that’s going to work?”

“…No,”

“Exactly.” You groan again, rubbing your hands over your face. “I’m never going to hear the end of this,”

Spencer smiles softly, reaching over to squeeze your hand. “At least we’re in it together, Mommy,”

You open your eyes just to glare at him. “You better not start doing that on purpose,”

He presses his lips together, trying to suppress a grin.

“Spencer,” you warn.

His grin widens. “Yes, Mommy?”

You grab a throw pillow and smack him with it, and his laughter fills the room, warm and familiar.

Exhausted as you both are, you wouldn’t trade this—your life, your family, the teasing from your team—for anything in the world.

[yanderedrabbles]

Foreign Yandere x Air Hostess Reader

He's beyond shady. Got connections and friends in all the lowest places. But you're just a little too slow to realise it.

Foreign Yandere who sees you for the first time on his first flight out of the country. He’s a sketchy guy, got a pack of fake passports in a hidden compartment in his bag, but you smile at him like you don’t see the tattoos, the scarred knuckles, the too quick hands.

Oh, you’re pretty. All the cabin crew are, but you’re something new. Exotic almost. Got him wondering exactly how different you are in bed too, got him wondering if you’d put up a fuss if he cornered you in the bathroom. Hell, you might like it. Folk always said foreign girls were down for so much more.

It’s a long-haul flight and your supervisor is bitchy about damn near everything you do. Passengers aren’t much better after twelve hours with their legs cramped up and only shitty plane chow to eat. He can see it wearing on you, can see the way your smile gets tighter after every too sharp complaint. Makes him want to beat their faces into a pulp.

His last straw comes at hour sixteen, when you’re clearly exhausted and one passenger just won’t let up. Practically screaming at you about not getting his specially ordered meal. You’re dealing with it as best you can, but everyone has a limit. He can see the tears starting to brim behind your waterline, can see you struggling to fight them back.

He stands so fast that his seat mate actually flinches. Comes to stand behind you and glares at the troublemaker. The man doesn’t let up, just switches his anger to him.

“You got a problem, huh?”

Foreign Yandere who doesn’t have a lot of English, but he knows a threat when he hears one. He leans down, shoots the man a smile filled with all the menace of a streetfighter.

“What did you say to me?” he asks, in his own language. It isn’t the standard dialect. It’s the regional kind, the type that’s as rough ‘round the edges as its speakers.

The man quails.

 “Sorry,” he mutters. But that’s not good enough.

Foreign Yandere who jerks his head at you, his message clear even across the language barrier.

Apologise to her.

The guy does. Red in the face, resentful about it, spitting his sorry through his teeth like an insult.

You look up at him, the foreigner with the hard eyes, and thank him. In his own language.

Your accent is thick, the pronunciation too rounded on the vowels. But he’ll be damned if it ain’t just fucking adorable.

“Anytime,” he tells you.

It’s not long after he’s back in his seat that you bring him a complimentary cup of coffee and a muffin. The good stuff too, not the swill that usually gets served in economy. He grabs your wrist before you can leave, grip just a little too tight without meaning to be.

“Can I see you again?”

Your grasp of the language isn’t the best, and it takes you a minute to puzzle out what he's asked. When you finally get it, you smile at him and shake your head. Rueful.

“Against company policy to meet the passengers after the flight ends.”

He lets it go. Sighs and says he understands, wouldn’t want to get you in trouble. A surprisingly polite answer from a man who looks like he never hears the word no without following it with a punch to the teeth.

But he doesn’t let it go. Not really. After the plane is deboarded, he skips lines and almost skips customs to keep his eye on you. When you get into a shuttle bus with the rest of your coworkers, he takes careful note of the hotel name scrawled on the side.

His business goes well - if you can call smuggling business that is. The boys he’s dealing with have their own plane to get him home. The kind of small jet that never lands at any airport marked on a map. He slips them all a little something extra under the table and asks if he can bring a guest.

“Will they be conscious?”

He grins. “Not if I can help it.”

Getting you is the tricky part. He borrows a suit and cleans himself up. Shows up at the hotel desk in the middle of the night and tells them he’s here to pick you up for an unscheduled early flight. He knows your name, your company, even your damn rank in the crew. Everything he says checks out. And if the receptionist that calls you thinks he looks a little rough to be a driver, she doesn’t mention it.

You show up with your uniform a tiny bit askew and a sock sticking out of your suitcase. You must have scrambled out of bed without even bothering to double check with your supervisor. Good. The less people that know the better.

He mostly keeps his back to you. Doesn’t want you to recognise him too soon. He shouldn’t have worried. You’re too jetlagged and blurry eyed to even recognise your own mother.

It’s only when you’re in his car and speeding down the wrong highway that you start to get suspicious. Start to come awake fully.

“Which company did you say you work for again?”

He doesn’t reply. You’re going to have to put more effort into learning and speaking his language. No point encouraging you by answering.

“Excuse me?”

You lean forward to get his attention and when he hears your little gasp, he knows the game is up. That you recognise him. Honestly, he’s a little offended that it took you this long. He could keep track of you through a sea of faces back at the airport after all.

“Listen, I don’t know why you’re here. But please stop the car.”

See? You’re speaking his language a bit better already.

“No chance sweetheart. You’re coming home with me.”

He can almost admire your guts when you go straight for the door, despite the speedometer showing over 200. Locked of course. He’s not an idiot.

When he finally arrives at the hangar, it takes him and two other thugs to finally hold you still.

“Fucking feisty thing,” one of them snarls when you land a good kick to his knee.

When he finally manages to prick the injection into your neck, you’re crying so hard that your mascara is running.

“You put up a good fight baby,” he comforts you as you go limp in his arms. “But I just want this more than you.”

His buddies smirk when they look at your body sprawled out on the seat.

“Nice catch. I’m mad I didn’t see her first.”

“You gonna be nice and share?”

That makes him grin. “We’ll see. If she’s too much to handle, well…”

That makes them snicker.

You shouldn’t assume someone’s a thug just ‘cause of the way they look. But in his case, those scars weren’t earned through gentle accidents.

And when he gets you home, someplace probably tropical, someplace where a missing foreigner isn't that surprising a thing, he'll show you exactly how dangerous it is to smile at a criminal and expect him to just let it go.

[delulustateofmind]

I fear I have gone soft, here is JJK husbands x Reader play fighting.

Satoru is, without a doubt, the most playful of husbands. Mischief practically sparkles in his bright blue eyes as he corners you, wiggling his fingers ominously before lunging. Whether you like it or not, you will be tickled. Just loves watching you scramble away, curling into a tiny, desperate ball, laughing breathlessly as you plead for mercy. But mercy isn’t in his vocabulary. Instead, he grins down at you, bright eyes twinkling with amusement. “Oh? What’s this?” he coos, tilting his head dramatically. “A little snack-sized human? Guess I better show you what happens when a curse eats you.” Before you can protest, he’s on you - playfully nipping at your shoulders, your neck, even your cheeks. His teeth graze your skin between bouts of harsh tickling (he's not gentle with it, you will be bruised by morning), his warm hands squeezing your sides until you're a giggling, half-crying mess. He only stops when you're gasping for air, sprawled across the floor, cheeks flushed, and eyes watery. And even then, he kisses your forehead sweetly, whispering, “You’re too cute when you’re helpless.”

Suguru is different - rougher, slower, and far more smug. He doesn’t just play-fight with you; he toys with you. A playful smirk tugs at his lips as he effortlessly traps you, long fingers curling around your wrist as he twists your arm behind your back - gently, but with enough force to remind you that struggling is pointless. Leaning in close, his breath warm against your ear. “Shhh, baby. Just let it happen,” he whispers a slight chuckle leaving his lips. You wince as you try to pull away. “See? If you keep squirming, it’s only going to hurt more.” The way he restrains you feels almost too easy, and it doesn’t help that his chest is pressed flush against your back, his warmth seeping into you. Then you feel it - the unmistakable hardness against you. He knows you notice, and that only makes his smirk grow. “Aw, feeling shy now?” he taunts, pressing just a little closer. Play fighting with Suguru is always a dangerous game, because he knows exactly how to turn it into something else.

Nanami doesn’t engage in nonsense - at least, that’s what he wants you to believe. But if you’re feeling particularly brave and decide to poke the bear, he’ll indulge you. Just once. He lets out a deep, exasperated sigh, adjusting his tie as he watches you with mild amusement. And then, in a single swift motion, he grabs you, effortlessly tossing you onto the bed as if you weigh nothing. His large hands pin you down just long enough for you to realize - oh, he’s strong. There’s no smug teasing, no taunting - just the confidence of a man. He stares down at you with a small smirk, shaking his head. “Are you done?” he asks, voice calm, but there’s a hint at something playful in his tone. And when you huff in defiance, his lips twitch just slightly. “Good. Because I have work to do.” And yet, as he pulls away, there’s a fleeting touch - a warm palm grazing your hip, a small brush of his fingers along your cheek - that betrays just how much he enjoys indulging you.

Sukuna? Yeah, let’s not. The moment you so much as think about play fighting with him, he’s already watching you like a predator sizing up its prey. Lips curling into a sharp, nearly playful grin as he cracks his knuckles, tilting his head. “You sure about that, little one?” he muses, eyes gleaming at the challenge. If you try to land a playful shove, he’s immediately countering - grabbing your wrist so fast you barely register the movement before you’re flipped onto your back, pinned beneath his weight. His claws press lightly into your skin, enough to remind you exactly who you’re dealing with. “Tch. You’re too weak,” scoffing, though there’s something almost affectionate in the way he smirks down at you, another glint of amusement in his crimson gaze. He likes to watch you struggle, likes to see you realize there’s no winning against him. And if you pout? If you grumble that he’s being unfair? He only laughs - a deep, rich sound that vibrates through your chest as you squirm - before leaning down, lips ghosting over your ear. “Cry all you want, brat. You started this.”

[wosospacegirl]

Matching stitches - Grace Clinton

Summary: Y/n can handle tough tackles and intense matches—but stitches? Absolutely not. After a head collision mid-match, the last person she expects to help her through it is Grace —her opponent.

Warnings: mentions of blood; hurt comfort; just a meet cute overall with a lot of found family and accidentally liking old pictures on ig hehe

Word count: 7k

MASTERLIST

..

The game was heated.

1-1 and both teams wanted to win.

Y/n didn’t see it coming.

She was close to the Manchester United goal, ready to assist either Alessia or Foxy. Leah had played a long ball to Y/n, who jumped as the ball got closer, ready to receive it.

As the ball came closer, Y/n felt the impact of a body against her, knocking her to the ground. She felt something sharp open her inner lip and hit her forehead.

She fell on the pitch, her back hitting the grass painfully. For a moment she couldn't breathe, her lungs aching from the impact.

“Fuck,” Y/n muttered.

The crowd fell silent.

Y/n could smell grass, blood and sweat. It was a mixture of smells that Y/n was used to, but at the moment it reeked.

Her whole body ached as if a knife were slicing through her lips and forehead. She tried to move her head, but that hurt too. She could not see who crushed her.

The Arsenal players came running as soon as Y/n’s hit the ground. A mix of familiar voices reached Y/n’s ear. They were all talking at the same time, but it was as if they made no sense, it was just a blend of words being thrown around.

“She’s fucking bleeding!” Y/n heard Leah’s voice. “Stop the game! Call someone!”

The referee hadn’t blown the whistle yet. Maybe they should because Y/n was not going to get up anytime soon.

Y/n felt lightheaded like she was going to pass out any time soon. She wanted to stay there on the pitch, the grass hugging her, even though it irritated her skin.

Okay maybe her brain wasn’t getting all the oxygen it needed. She felt dazed.

“There’s been a head clash here! Where are the bloody medics?”

Someone said Y/n wasn’t sure if it was Kim or Katie, maybe it was Jen. Oh no, Jen had retired a couple of seasons ago, hadn’t she? Wow, they really needed to get someone to help her out.

Her teammates, whether retired or not, sounded worried. Was it bad, maybe her injury was worse than she thought it was.

Y/n felt like she was dying, but her teammates usually just called her dramatic when she was tackled in a game.

Was she being dramatic right now?

She wasn’t sure. But she was tired though. And it hurt.

She wanted to rest. Maybe she should do that.

“No, don’t. Keep your eyes open,” Y/n felt the warmth of a hand holding hers, “They’re going to take you to the infirmary, okay?”

“Damn, she’s out.”

Was the last thing Y/n heard before everything went black.

..

“Y/n?”

Y/n forced herself to breathe. The air went in and out of her lungs, and her back didn’t hurt anymore, just the slight discomfort of being tackled and lying down on a hard surface.

Was she in a hospital? The bed she was in felt like a hospital bed. It was uncomfortable.

“Y/n, you need to open your eyes, I know you are awake,” the voice said again. It wasn’t familiar to Y/n, but it seemed to belong to an older woman.

Y/n tried to do what the woman asked her. She carefully opened one eye and then the other, but the lights in the room were too bright. She decided to close them.

Y/n didn’t remember exactly what happened. She was on the field playing, then someone crashed into her, and then she was out. She had a faint memory of Leah’s voice saying something to her as she was being carried off the pitch on a stretcher.

The first shock of pain hit her.

Y/n whimpered, bringing her hand to her lip and then to her forehead. Both places were wet and tender. Two very fresh bruises.

Medicine. Why hadn’t they given her some painkillers? If she was in a hospital, it must have been a bad one because she was in pain, her mouth tasted like iron.

Y/n tried to open her eyes again, the light was not as intense as before. She removed her hands from her face and looked at them, they were red.

Blood, fresh blood. She had been hurt and it hadn’t been long ago.

Why did it feel like days?

“Don’t look at it,” the older woman said, taking Y/n’s hands and cleaning them with a tissue.

“What hospital am I in?,” Y/n asked the woman.

“We're in the infirmary, the stadium’s infirmary,” another voice said beside Y/n. The voice was calm, not as energetic as the other women’s, and it was younger.

It was probably the person who had bumped into Y/n.

She was so disoriented that she hadn’t even noticed that someone else had been hurt as well. But if the pain on her face was any indication of how hard they had bumped into each other, the other player was probably in bad shape too.

She tried to turn her head around, but it hurt too much, so she just kept staring at the person in front of her.

Nurse Mary, the badge said. She had a kind, round face.

“Are you all right?” The younger voice said again.

Y/n tried to remember who the voice belonged to. She was being marked by Gabby George and Millie. T seconds before she was hit, but they were in front of her and the collision was caused by someone running to her side. So Y/n didn't see who it was.

Y/n turned her head to the side, trying to catch a glimpse of the girl, but the movement was too fast and nausea hit her stomach.

“Mary, I'm gonna throw up,” Y/n warned the nurse.

A few seconds later there was a bucket right next to her.

Y/n emptied her stomach. The vomit was mixed with blood from her new injuries and she just wanted to go home, put an ice pack on her face and pretend this day never happened, especially after throwing up in front of two strangers.

Nurse Mary patted Y/n’s back maternally. “It's okay, honey. You’ve got a concussion, it's normal to feel nauseous. Miss Grace here also had a concussion.”

Grace? Grace Clinton?

Great, she had puked in front of Grace Clinton. Not embarrassing at all.

Y/n had the vaguest recollection of seeing Grace in the tunnel as they walked to the pitch. She had her hair in a low bun and her shirt looked a size too big for her.

Grace was a midfielder for Man United, she was very young but very skilled. Y/n had never had the chance to talk to her before, but Leah had told her once that Grace was very calm on the pitch and that she should mark her, but not be too aggressive about it, as Grace herself had a chill style of play.

“You bumped heads during the game,” Mary continued. “It wasn’t too bad, so there was no need for an ambulance.”

Y/n felt like she had been hit by a whole bus, not just bumped heads. Clinton was strong, so it made sense that she was in so much pain from the collision.

“–But you Y/n got the worst of it, Grace’s teeth bit your inner lip open when you both fell,” Mary added.

Grace's teeth?

That explained why she felt like her lips were split open.

When Y/n opened her mouth to ask Grace if she was all right, a wet, cold cloth was pressed into her face.

“Ouch! Fuck, it hurts,” Y/n said angrily, but regret quickly struck her. She shouldn't be yelling at Mary.

“I-'m sorry, it just…”

“Hurts?” Mary finished the sentence for her.

“Yeah,” Y/n mumbled, accepting the cloth to her face, the coldness of it helping with the burning sensation and easing her pain. She stayed with the cloth for a few seconds before Mary took it away from her.

“You two sit nice and still, okay?” Mary said. “I need to get some supplies in the other room, but I’ll be back.”

“I’ll talk to your teammates, too, Y/n,” she said, turning to Y/n now. “They were quite a bit worried about you, especially the skipper.”

Before Y/n could reply Mary left.

She and Grace were alone in the small room, the smell of antiseptic and disinfectant filling Y/n’s nose. She hated it.

Y/n slowly sat up on the bed and finally looked at Grace, who was sitting on the bed next to her.

Her back was propped up against two pillows, she was still wearing her Manchester kit, stained with dirt and blood. Her hair was down around her shoulders, a few leaves of grass lying in between the strings.

Should Y/n tell her about the grass? Well, given Y/n’s situation, she wasn’t really in a position to judge. She hadn’t looked in the mirror yet, but she knew she was a mess.

Grace had a very soft, baby-like face, with delicate features, but right now she looked like she had come back from war. Her bottom lip was swollen, with a deep cut on it. Y/n couldn't see it properly because Grace was holding an ice pack against it, but from what she could see it was obvious that the girl’s lip was just also bruised.

“Your mouth–” Y/n said, pointing at Grace.

“Yeah, yours doesn't look too different either,” Grace said, removing the ice from her face. “Sorry about that.”

“It’s okay. I don’t remember how it happened.” Y/n admitted.

“Tooney made a high pass, I tried to get it with my head and I didn’t see you were close,” Grace said with a sad smile. “They say we bump heads but I pretty much bit your lip off, too”

“it hurts,” Y/n said in a low voice.

“I’m sorry.”

“It's okay. Are you okay?” Y/n asked.

“Yeah, I'm fine, but we’re gonna have to get stitches though,” Gracie said casually as she leaned back on her bed.

Stitches.

Great.

“I don’t think I’ll need stitches,” Y/n said, trying to sound stoic. She couldn’t freak out in front of Grace Clinton.

She was terrified of needles and anything that had to go into her skin. She didn’t even have any tattoos for that reason. Y/n was most definitely not going to get stitches, nonetheless here in the Man United infirmary. If it was in Arsenal’s infirmary might be cool about it.

“Well, I can barely understand what you’re saying because of how much your lip is so busted, so I think you are going to need stitches,” Grace said with an amused smile on her face. “She’ll put a numbing cream on it, you won’t feel a thing, don’t worry.”

“I’m not worried.” Y/n lied, her trembling hands betraying her. She quickly tried to hide them by sitting on her hands, but then her feet began to move anxiously.

Grace looked Y/n up and down, an understanding smile on her face. “You don’t have to act tough, it’s okay.”

Y/n felt a rush of blood to her cheeks. “I’m not acting tough,” she muttered, looking down.

She was a grown woman with a fear of needles. She felt silly.

Mary came in, a box written with suture materials on her hand.

Y/n went pale. Maybe she was going to throw up again.

“Okay sweeties,” Mary said enthusiastically, as if she enjoyed sewing people up. “Good news first: I found the anaesthetic cream,” she held up the small tube up as a prize.

“And bad news: we’ve got to be quickly because Y/n’s bus is waiting for her to leave, so let’s get going!” Mary continued.

Good to know that Y/n hadn’t been completely abandoned by her teammates in the middle of Manchester.

“Y/n, let’s get you stitched up first, yeah?”

Y/n gulped and opened her mouth, but she froze and couldn’t say anything. She looked frightened at Mary terrified and then at Grace.

“I can go first, Mary,” Grace said, holding up her hand. “I don’t mind.”

“Okay, then,” Mary said.

The nurse took the suture kit and walked in Grace’s direction. Y/n couldn’t see what Mary was doing because her body was directly in front of Y/n. The girl could only hear the nurse open the cream, and then it was quiet.

Mary started stitching Grace up. Grace didn’t make a sound or move. Y/n was in awe, she just couldn’t believe that she was being switched up and not shaking all over.

In less than 10 minutes Grace’s stitches were done. They were just on her lips, in the same place where Y/n would get hers.

The stitches were small, they looked raw and swollen, but the scar would be tiny.

“Okay, you’re good to go, honey, just make sure you don’t carry any heavyweight until your bruise is completely healed.” Mary patted Grace on the back as the girl got up from the bed.

Mary turned to Y/n and pointed at her. “Now it’s your turn, lie down on the bed for me please.”

Y/n’s heart skipped a beat again.

Okay, she could do it. All she had to do was breathe in and out.

Y/n tried to breathe, but the air didn’t reach her lungs. Her hands started to tremble. She shook her head and put her hands in front of her body, not letting Mary get any closer.

“I don’t want to,” Y/n said, trying to get away from Mary. “I’ll get stitches when I get back to Arsenal.” She was most definitely not going to do that.

Mary looked at her like she was a child.

“And are you planning to sit on a 4-hour drive to London with blood dripping from your forehead and mouth?” Mary asked patronisingly. “Don’t be silly, there’s no way a player like you is afraid of a few stitches, now lie down, I haven’t got all the time in the world and neither have you.

Okay, Mary wasn’t so nice anymore.

If Y/n hadn’t just had a concussion, she’d swear she’d seen the slightest frown on Grace’s face.

Y/n was embarrassed. She was a professional player and she was afraid of stitches, blood and needles. Y/n’s worst nightmare wasn’t to tear her ACL, but to suffer some kind of laceration during the game. And right now her nightmare had come true.

Her brain was already planning an escape route. There was nothing in her contract that said she had to go through with medical procedures if she didn’t agree with them.

And yes, her teammates would not enjoy spending 4 hours on a bus with someone bleeding, but what could they do? Put her on a train and send her off to London on her own.

If she could just get Mary to look away for a second, maybe she could reach the door and…

Y/n felt a dip in the mattress by her side.

“You guys won, did you know it?” Grace said, smiling at Y/n. “Cooney-Cross scored, 2-1 to Arsenal.”

Y/n narrowed her eyes. “You’re trying to distract me, I know it.”

“I just want to talk, really,” Grace said relaxed as if the infirmary was her favourite place to make small talk. “

Mary put the numbing cream first on her forehead and then on her lips. It stung at first, but then she couldn’t feel her skin anymore, as if it was anaesthetized.

Y/n breathed in and out again, trying not to panic. She would get stitches and she would be fine.

She closed her eyes.

“Who-who assisted Kyra?” Y/n questioned. If Grace was being kind enough to help her, Y/n would cooperate as well.

Mary’s cold hand found her skin. She didn't know if she was getting the stitches yet. Maybe not feeling them was worse than feeling the pain, at least she could understand what was happening.

“That Fox girl, I think her name is Emily, right?” Grace said. “Is she American?”

“Uhum,” Y/n said.

Breathe in and out. She just had to pretend there weren’t any kind of needles near her face.

“Now I’m going to do your lips, just keep them closed, Y/n,” Mary said.

If she was working on Y/n’s lips then maybe she was done with her forehead? She didn’t feel any pain, so it was probably good.

“I’ve always wanted to visit America,” Grace said, more to herself since Y/n couldn’t answer her. “I saw that Arsenal played in Washington last season, I hope Man United can play there too, it would be fun to travel with the girls.”

Y/n smiled, thinking about the trip. It was really a nice change of scenery to play in America. The crowd was different, the weather was warmer. It was a good memory.

“Try not to smile now, honey,” Mary said. “I’m almost finished here.”

“We’ve got a game in France next week, it’s just a friendly against Lyon, but it’ll be nice to get away from England’s winter,” Grace continued. “Not that the weather in France is any better at this time of the year. But still, I would rather be cold and eat a good croissant.”

Y/n wanted to smile at Grace again but remembered Mary’s scolding.

“And we’re all done here!” Mary said, clapping her hands. “Now you’re both free to go, I’ll email each of your clubs what we’ve done so they can include it in your medical report.”

Y/n opened her eyes and was met with Grace’s face. She looked pretty, even with the stitches on.

“Thank you, Mary,” Y/n and Grace said in unison as they left the infirmary. They were met with a silent and empty corridor.

Manchester United Stadium was pretty and clean, but it was way too dark to see anything. The hallways were gloomy and Y/n wasn’t a fan of the dark.

“Thank you for what you did there,” Y/n said, looking up at Grace, she couldn't really see her face, but Y/n knew she was there by the subtle touch of their hands as they walked. “You didn't have to, you’re probably late now and–”

“I know I didn’t have to,” Grace said as they walked through the corridors. “I just wanted to do it.”

Y/n honestly didn’t know where she was, she was just following Grace, hoping that the girl knew her own team’s stadium better she did.

“But you were scared and it was my fault that you had to get stitches at the end of the day,” Grace continued. “Besides, it was nice talking to you.”

Y/n blushed slightly. “You still think that even after I threw up in front of you and almost had a panic attack because of some stitches?” Y/n said half-jokingly, feeling a small shiver as their hands touched again

“Well, I did cut your lip open with my teeth, so I’d say we’re even,” Grace joked, turning left into a hallway that was less dark than before.

“It’s a very physical game, it’s bound to happen,” Y/n said smiling. “You don’t have to apologise.”

They walked on until Y/n finally realised where she was. She was near the changing rooms for the away and home teams. Next to the changing room was the media room, where the players, but mainly the technical staff, answered questions from sports journalists.

There were a lot of voices coming from the media room, it looked busy.

Y/n took a quick look inside the room and saw both Arsenal and Man United managers answering questions.

She wasn’t as sneaky as she thought she was, though, because in a matter of seconds a girl with a badge that said ‘Media’ was standing in front of her and Grace, mobile phone in hand.

“Hi girls, I’m Tara, I work for the Barclays Women's Super League’s Instagram and I was wondering if I could get a picture of you two together?” The woman asked nicely. “The fans are worried about your injury, so it would be nice to give a little update.”

“Would it just be a picture? Or an interview? We can’t talk much because of our lips,” Grace said, pointing at Y/n’s mouth and then at herself. “We just got stitches.”

“Just a picture to put on the Instagram feed,” Tara explained professionally. “If that’s all right with you, guys?”

Grace and Y/n exchanged a look and then nodded to Tara, who smiled and asked them to stand in front of one of the lights in the hallway.

Grace took a step closer to Y/n and gently placed her hand on Y/n’s hip. They smiled as Grace made the peace sign with her hand.

Y/n missed Grace’s hand after she had taken it from her body. It was warm, she liked it.

“Okay, that’s great! Thanks, girls,” Tara said after looking at the picture on her phone. “I hope you make a full recovery”

Tara left, leaving Y/n and Grace alone.

“We should probably go before more journalists come, I don’t really feel like talking to them,” Grace said.

“Well, we actually can’t talk much, anyway.”

They walked until they reached a door with the words “Player’s car park” on it. Grace opened the door for Y/n and they were greeted by the Manchester night.

Y/n quickly spotted the Arsenal bus. She even forgot that her teammates were waiting for her, they must be tired of waiting. It was already late.

Y/n turned to Grace “Thanks again, for staying with me…and being so nice,”

Grace smiled, “You don’t have to thank me, it’s alright, I’m the one who should thank you, if it was any other player they’d be mad at me for the injury, it was reckless.”

“I don't think anyone could be mad at you,” Y/n said, looking into Grace’s green eyes

“Oh they could,” Grace joked, looking around the car park. “Sorry again for hurting you, I hope it heals soon”

“It will, I’ll take good care of it,” Y/n said.

“Good. I’ll see you around, yeah?” Grace said.

“Yeah, of course,” Y/n said, feeling warmth in her cheeks. Grace was pretty, very pretty.

“Bye them, have a safe trip,” Grace waved before walking to a car parked on the other side of the parking lot, Y/n assumed it was hers.

Y/n made her way to the Arsenal team bus, but when she opened the door all she could hear was her teammates yapping.

“I think I should go check on her,” Kim said worriedly. “She’s been there for an hour!”

“I already talked to the nurse, she said it would take some time to stitch her up, mate, be patient,” Leah said.

“And that’s why somebody should go with her, Y/n is scared of needles, how is she going to get stitched up alone?” Kim stated.

“Kim, mate, relax! You always fuss over us, Y/n's fine, I just spoke with the nurse.”

“Of course, I fuss over you guys, I’m the captain! And you, Leah,” Kim said pointing at the blonde, “should do the same, since you’re co-captain.”

Leah rolled her eyes. “Okay, okay, I’ll go! You’re talking as if I didn't stand by the infirmary door like a dog until the nurse kicked me out,” Leah muttered as she walked down the steps of the bus.

As she walked down she came face to face with Y/n.

“Oh look who’s here,” Leah said smiling, stopping in her tracks, she turned around and shouted, “Guys, she’s here!”

Leah took Y/n’s hand and the two girls walked into the bus. It was mostly dark, with an annoying smell of the peanuts Katie was always snacking on.

When the girl saw Y/n they all smiled at him.r

“Hey girl, how are you?” Alessia said, getting up from her seat to give Y/n a hug. “I was so scared when you fell there was so much blood on Grace's face! And the referee took forever to stop the game.”

Leah put a comforting hand on Y/n’s back. “You fainted, I thought they were going to call an ambulance. Don’t do that again, please”

“Do that again? You’re saying it like I wanted to get my forehead and lips cut open,” Y/n mumbled, waving and smiling at Kim.

“Leah and Kim were so angry,” Katie said from one of the last seats, “I think the only reason Leah didn’t scream at Grace was because she was hurt.”

“Of course, I wanted to scream! What was she thinking, jumping on you like that?” Leah said, her protective side showing as she squeezed Y/n’s shoulder a little harder. “She knows better than that. If it had happened at Camp, Sarina would’ve benched her on the spot.

“Come on Leah, you’d never forgive yourself if you shouted at Gracie girl,” Beth said, “she’s a sweetheart when we play for England.”

“Plus, I don’t think she saw Y/n, she wasn’t even looking at her side,” Kim said, “But let’s forget about Grace, how are those stitches? Did you panic?”

“Yeah I kind of did, but Grace talked me through it,” Y/n said, sitting down in her usual spot next to Alessia, the blonde wrapping her arms around her.

“That seems like grace, she is like the nicest person ever,” Alessia said. “And she gives great hugs too.”

“Okay, now you’re all making me feel bad for getting mad at her,” Leah said, rolling her eyes and sitting down in her seat a few rows away from Y/n.

“So y/n, tell me, do you think the game was mind-blowing or what?” Kyra said teasingly, sitting in the row right behind Y/n and Alessia, Steph by her side.”

“Too soon to be making puns about her bruise, you menace,” Steph said, playfully smacking Kyra on the head. “At least wait until it heals.”

..

The Arsenal team have been on the road to London for two hours. Everyone was asleep, some girls had their sleep masks on, and others were wrapped in blankets.

Everyone except Y/n.

The pain in her lip and forehead was bothering her and she didn’t have any painkillers she could take, she’d have to wait until she got home to take some ibuprofen. The pain was the main reason why Y/n was awake and playing games on her phone next to a very sleeping Alessia.

Y/n had set the screen brightness to the lowest possible, the bus was completely dark, which made her feel furtive in some sort of way.

She was halfway through with her Sudoku when she got a notification on her Instagram.

Barclays Women’s Super League tagged you on their post.

Y/n quickly clicked on it and in a matter of seconds, the picture of her and Grace appeared on her screen.

“A tough game, but both players are on the mend! ⚽” read the caption. There were an awful lot of comments on the post already. Maybe people were really worried about them.

The picture was cute.

Well, Grace looked cute. Y/n looked awful, her kit was completely dirty with grass, blood and mud, her hair was in a messy bun, and you could literally see the sweat on her neck. Gross.

Y/n’s stitches looked awful as well, they were very red, swollen and just raw.

Of course, Grace didn't look much different from Y/n, neither of them had had a chance to shower before the photo, but still, for some reason, Grace still looked pretty in her Manchester United kit.

Y/n stared at the picture, then the picture stared at her back.

She clicked on the post and saw Grace’s Instagram handle. She clicked on it and started scrolling through Grace’s profile, but not in I'm-obsessed-with-you way, more like a you-were-so-nice-i-want-to-get-to-know-you-better way.

Her Instagram was like any other player's. Lots of pictures of her on the pitch, in training, and at camp, but not much about her private life, unfortunately.

Y/n didn't know why she felt so creepy while scrolling through Grace’s Instagram, It wasn’t like it was wrong or weird, they just met and y/n wanted to know more about her… see if there were any hobbies she was interested in in in, what places had Grace had been, and stuff like that.

Grace seemed like a very nice person through the lens of Instagram. She seemed very dedicated to football, loyal to a few of her friends, and funny but also private.

Y/n wasn’t much different, she also didn’t like to post much about her life outside of football on social media. She and Grace had this in common.

Y/n went back to the picture of them together.

Maybe she should comment on it. Something casual, something funny, but not bold.

Stitch up buddies! she wrote, but then deleted.

God, that was so lame.

Matching tattoos are overrated, so we got matching stitches instead.

That was good. It was casual, it didn’t sound like she was flirting.

She hit send.

Then she dramatically put her hands in her face. “Bloody hell why did I do that?” she whispered to herself, but not loud enough for anyone to hear.

Would Grace think she was weird? She didn’t tag Grace on the comment, maybe the girl wouldn’t even see it and they’d just get on with their lives. Maybe she could delete it.

Y/n waited a few seconds before unlocking her phone again. She decided to finish her Sudoku, maybe it would help her fall asleep.

When she was almost done with a square her phone buzzed. She read the notification.

Grace Clinton replied to your comment.

Y/n’s heart dropped. She hesitated before opening the notification.

No one I’d rather get stitches with❤️

Y/n smiled as she read it, feeling like a giggling teenager with a secret crush.

Grace saw her comment and replied to it, and put a heart emoji next to it and it was a red heart emoji. Y/n stared at the comment for a few seconds before deciding she needed big help.

“Hey Less,” Y/n nudged Alessia, who was sleeping, face against the window, wrapped in an Arsenal hoodie. “I need your help.”

“Mm?”

Y/n place the phone on Alessia's barely awake face, she squinted her eyes because of the sudden light and pushed it away slightly, confused.

“What does a heart emoji mean?” Y/n asked,

“Huh?” Alessia said again, still sleepy.“What are you talking about?” She rubbed her eyes.

“A media girl took a picture of me and Grace after we got the stitches and they posted it, see here” Y/n showed Alessia the picture, but the girl still looked barely awake.

“Okay–?”

“So I commented on it, and Gracie replied to my comment!” Y/n did the same thing, showing Alessia the screen, but this time Alessia took the phone to read it herself.

“Oh,”

“Oh? What does "oh" mean?” Y/n said worriedly.

Alessia smiled at Y/n, a little grin on her face, something you didn’t normally see from Alessia. “Oh as in she used a red heart! That's good, oh.”?”

“Yes! That's what I thought, she could choose a blue one, right or even a yellow one?” Y/n said enthusiastically. “But do you feel like she picked it in a friendly way or…”

“What are you guys on about?” Kyra chimed in from the seat behind Y/n, just her face sticking out of the side of Y/n’s seat. “

“Y/n has a crush on Grace,” Alessia said in a low voice.

“I-What?! It’s not a crush, stop it,” Y/n denied, frowning. “It’s–I just think she’s cute, that’s all.”

“Oh wow, a crush, huh?” Kyra said, wiggling her eyebrows. “Are you star-crossed lovers? She bit a part of your lip and now she has a piece of your heart?”

Y/n rolled her eyes and pushed Kyra's face back into her row. “You’re so annoying, go back to your seat.”

“What are you going to do about that comment?” Alessia asked, ignoring the usual bickering between Kyra and Y/n.

“I don’t know. What do you think I should do, Less?” Y/n asked.

Alessia and Kyra were Y/n’s go-to girls for every problem she had, although she always leaned more towards Alessia when her problems involved other people.

“You should reply to it,” Kyra said, sticking her head back to Y/n’s row. “Drop a heart too, I dunno, but you can’t just leave it at that.”

“How do you even know what we are talking about? I haven’t even told you what she commented” Y/n turned to Kyra.

“I was eavesdropping,” Kyra admitted, “You guys were whisper-yelling.”

“No, we were not,” Y/n argued.

“Yes you were, you should be grateful that Kim sleeps with earplugs. Do you remember the last time we woke her up during a trip? She made Less cry.”

“She scares me sometimes,” Alessia said, looking into the void.

“Guys back to the real problem!” Y/n said, pointing at her phone. “Should I just like the comment and say anything? Or maybe I don't like it at all?”

“Can I take a look at it?” Kyra asked a pout on her face. “Please?”

“Yeah, of course, babe,” Y/n said, giving the phone to Kyra.

She was so bad at socialising and interacting with people in general, especially the ones she found attractive, like Grace.

She wasn’t even sure if Grace was into girls. Then again, she was a football player, so there was at least a 75 per cent chance—but still. Y/n bit her lip out of anxiety, but a sharp pain came, she forgot she had just got those damn stitches.

“Oh no,” Kyra whispered.

“What?” Y/n and Alessia turned their heads at the same time, not so much as whisper-yelling anymore.

“I liked one of her pictures,” Kyra admitted, talking fast “I’m so so sorry Y/n, I just disliked it back, but she’ll get the notification anyway.”

Y/n went pale. Fuck no.

“Kyra!” Y/n said, taking the phone out of her hands.

“Was it an old picture?” Alessia asked, biting her nails and looking from Kyra to Y/n. “Y/n don’t freak out, it’s okay.” She put a hand on Y/n's back and patted it.

“I think it was from 3 years ago,” Kyra said. “I just wanted to see her profile! I’m really sorry!”

“I’m gonna eat broken glass,” Y/n said. No expression on her face.

Alessia put her arm around Y/n. “It’s okay, maybe she won’t even notice, she must get a lot of notifications all the time, she probably won’t see yours.”

“Yeah! Especially after a game, people go crazy when we play,” Kyra said guiltily. “I’m really sorry, I didn't mean to.”

“It’s okay, Ky,” Y/n said, leaning into Alessia's shoulder as Kyra’s hand patted her arm.

“I guess I’ll just never play against Man United ever again,” Y/n continued, biting her nails. “It’s not like football is my only talent, I can quiet it. That’s a good option.

“When’s our next game against United anyway?” Alessia asked, ignoring Y/n ramblings.

“In two months,” Kyra replied. “But it’s just a friendly.”

“Just so you know I’ll have a serious case of period cramps by then. Y/n said. “Renée will have to bench me.”

Y/n was in distress. Now Grace was going to think she was some kind of weird stalker going through old pictures of her. She wanted to hide away in her bed and never come out into the world ever again.

Y/n’s phone buzzed again, unexpectedly.

The three girls held their breath.

“I can’t look at it,” Y/n said, giving her phone to Alessia and burying her face in her shirt. “You look at it.”

Alessia took the phone as Kyra moved her head to see the screen.

“Oh she definitely noticed you,” Alessia said teasingly. “She just followed you! Yay! ”

“What!?” Y/n said, taking her face out of her shirt. “She followed me?!”

“And liked your last post about helping stray animals,” Kyra said, holding the phone to her face.

Y/n felt disappointed. “Really?

“No, I'm kidding, she liked a selfie, and an old one too, from 2021,” Kyra smiled as she jabbed from Y/n playful punch. “Congrats, she likes you back,”

“Now Y/n, you have to say ‘Kyra thank you so much, your mistake was a blessing in disguise, I’m so lucky to have you as a frie–”

“Who likes you back?”

The three girls turned their heads.

Leah was staring at them, arms crossed, frown on her face, her pillow tucked under her arm. She looked tired.

“W-what?” the girls said in unison.

“Did we wake you up? Kyra said, trying to give Leah one of her sweet smiles, but the frown on Leah’s face continued.”We’re sorry,”

“Yes you did, you’re out here giggling like schoolgirls,” she muttered. “But it doesn’t matter, at least Kim is still asleep. If she woke up we’d have a problem.”

They all looked to their left where Kim was in a deep sleep.

“Last time she woke up–”

“Yeah, we remember,” The girls answered Leah again in unison.

“But back to the point,” Leah said. “Who likes you back?”

The bus was silent.

“Oh come on, it’s the least you can do after waking me up,” Leah said, crossing her arms. “You know I never pry on your life, just tell me this once.”

Y/n looked at Alessia, then at Kyra, waiting for them to come in and elaborate a straight-up lie so she wouldn’t have to admit to Leah that she had a crush on the girl who sent her to the infirmary just three hours ago.

“I think Grace Clinton is cute.” Y/n quickly and defensively, crossing her arm and imitating Leah.

Leah grinned. “Grace Clinton, huh? Okay, I wasn’t expecting that. Do you have something for a girl who draws you a little blood? “

“Stop it, Leah, don’t say it like that!” Y/n blushed. “I think she’s cute and kind…and I’m not embarrassed about it.”

“I mean… yeah? Why would you be embarrassed about it? ” Leah said with the i-don’t-really-care-that-much��usual tone in her voice, " She is a nice girl.”

“Yeah, she is,” Y/n stated, a little defensive.

Ok, maybe she should let her guard down, neither Alessia nor Kyranorr Leah were judging her for her little crush.

“She just helped me calm down with the stitches,” Y/n explained. “And she’s pretty.

“You should just ask her out whenever we have a game around Manchester or London,” Leah said casually. “You could take her out to dinner, or to some coffee shop you like.”

“You say that as if it’s easy to just ask someone on a date,” Y/n said, rolling her eyes.

Leah looked at her confused. “Well, it is easy. You just have to ask them. If they say yes you go on the date and if they say no you just say ok and move on.”

“Things just work that way because you are Leah,” Y/n said, defeated. “I'm not like you, I'm not naturally charismatic or good with other people”

“I think you’re quite charming if that’s any consolation,” Kyra said, winking at her.

“It absolutely does not, Ky, but I appreciate you throwing me a pity bone,” Y/n said desolated.

Leah held out her hand, palm open. “Give me your phone–I’ll fix it in like ten seconds.”

“What, no!” Y/n said, holding her phone close to her chest, and protecting it.

“Why not? If you’re too scared I can ask her for you,” Leah rolled her eyes.

“I think you should do it,” Alessia said. “Or else you’ll regret not doing something about it,”

“Yeah, and you’ll whine about it every girl's night,” Kyra said. “Do it, come on.”

“What if she says no?” Y/n whined.

“Then you’ll get over it,” Leah said bluntly. “Haven’t you ever been rejected before?”

“No!” Y/n said. “I’m never the one who initiates anything.”

“Bloody hell, you’re hopeless.” Leah pinched the bridge of her nose.

“Leah!” Alessia said in a more stern voice. “Don’t say that, you have to encourage her.”

Leah held Y/n’s shoulder and leaned forward so they were the same height.

“You can’t be a coward forever,” Leah said, using her authoritative voice. “You need to woman up, are you a chicken or are you a girl?”

Y/n was silent for a few seconds.

“A girl,” she mumbled.

“Exactly, a girl, so let’s do it!”

Y/n thought about it and hesitantly handed her phone to Leah. “Don’t be too bold or too flirty or too Leah about it,”

Leah rolled her eyes but took the phone.

“Hey, Grace. Coffee next time we’re in Manchester or London?” Leah said aloud as she typed.

“No, that's too direct!” Y/n said

“Oh fine,” Leah huffed. “Hi, let me know if you’re ever around London, we could grab something to eat, xoxo.”

“I don't use xoxo.”

Leah looked at Y/n impatiently and clicked on the screen with more force than necessary, deleting the last part. “ok, no xoxo.” she huffed again.

Leah finished typing but didn’t hit send right away. She picked up the phone, teasing Y/n: “Are you going to do it, or should I?”

Y/n takes a deep breath, grabs the phone, and hits send herself—a small victory for her confidence.

“She’s gonna say yes, I can feel it,” Kyra says dramatically as Alessia hugged Y/n.

Y/n stared at her phone, her heart hammering against her ribs. She couldn’t take it back now. Well, she could, but that would be humiliating. The message was out there, sitting in Grace Clinton’s DMs, waiting to be read.

“See?” Leah smirked. “That wasn’t so hard.”

Y/n groaned and buried her face in her hoodie. “I’m never doing that again.”

“Oh, babe,” Kyra cooed, patting her head. “You’re gonna have to survive until she answers first.”

Y/n peeked at her phone screen one last time before locking it. Maybe getting stitches had been less painful than this.

..

Notes: Please like, share and let me know what you think! Feedback is important and makes me want to write even more. :D

Read more of my work here -> Masterlist

[mylovesstuffs]

Habits OT13 picked up from being with their s/o

Request: Hello can i request: habits svt got from being with their partners?pls🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼

Seungcheol – Checking in more often

Before dating you, he wasn’t the type to text much. But now, “Did you eat?” “Did you get home safe?” “Feeling okay today?” He started doing it because you always checked on him, and now it’s second nature.

Jeonghan – Saying “I love you” more often

He always showed love through actions but because you’re someone who expresses affection verbally, he started doing it too. Now, he randomly whispers “I love you” when you least expect it, even in the middle of teasing you.

Joshua – Mimicking your slang & speech patterns

If you have specific phrases or a certain way of talking, he 100% picks it up. One day, the members hear him say something like “Oh, slay” and immediately know that’s from you lol (reminds me of, very demure very mindful video of Joshua).

Jun – Adopting your little happy dances

If you do a little wiggle or jump when you’re excited, guess what? Jun does it now too. He doesn’t even realize he’s doing it until someone points it out.

Hoshi – Subconsciously leaning in for forehead kisses

Since you always give him forehead kisses, he now leans his head forward whenever he’s near you—whether he’s sitting next to you, hugging you, or even just standing around. It's muscle memory at this point.

Wonwoo – Laughing more openly

He’s always had a quiet, subtle laugh, but after dating you, he’s more open with it. You make him so happy that now he laughs more freely, even throwing his head back sometimes.

Woozi – Saying “hmm?” whenever he doesn’t hear something

You always go “hmm?” instead of “what?” when you don’t catch something, and now he does it too. The members were so confused when he started doing it because he never used to.

Dokyeom – Holding onto your sleeve or hand while talking

Since you have the habit of lightly grabbing his sleeve or hand while chatting, he unconsciously started doing it back. Now, when he’s excitedly telling a story, his fingers find your wrist without thinking.

Mingyu – Making your favorite drink/snack without thinking

It started when he would see you make the same drink/snack every day. Now, before you even ask, he’s already preparing it for you. Muscle memory kicked in hard.

Minghao – Subconsciously mirroring your habits

If you tilt your head when thinking, he does it too. If you rub your thumb against your lip when focused, he’s caught himself doing the same. He mirrors you a lot without even realizing.

Seungkwan – Complaining about things exactly like you do

You have a very specific way of ranting, and now, whenever he complains, he sounds just like you. The members immediately clock it when he says something in your exact tone and phrasing.

Vernon – Listening to your favorite songs on his own

Since you always play certain songs, he started liking them too. Now, you’ll catch him humming your favorite song while doing random things, and when you ask, he’s just like “Oh yeah, it’s good.”

Dino – Copying your way of texting

If you use a lot of emojis, type a certain way, or have a texting quirk, he now does too. The members were so confused when he suddenly started sending hearts or using cute speech.

[ober-affen-geil]

Oh hell yes lets go.

Ok so, as someone who has it, endometriosis goes super undiagnosed for a number of reasons.

First, the chief symptom is pain during menstruation which...is often undereported by the patient because they don't know it's a problem or because they've been told it's not a problem enough times they stop reporting it. (Other symptoms include pain during sex, issues with the bowel (poop), and infertility.)

Second, this is absolutely a genetic condition, and when the person you inherited it from isn't diagnosed and they tell you "oh that's normal" well...why would you bring it up to your doctor?

Third, currently the only way* to diagnose endometriosis is with invasive surgery. Tiny little incisions! But basically the only way doctors know for sure is by sticking a camera into the patient's abdominal cavity. More on this later.

And fourth...some people who have endometriosis don't have debilitating pain during menstruation. I have a family member who had a case so bad she was infertile (until treatment) and her only symptom was the infertility. Her partner remembers the pictures from her abdomen as "spiderwebs everywhere" and the surgeon told her she should have been presenting as a, and pardon the language here, "pelvic cripple" and she had no idea.

So, what is it? In extremely simple terms, the lining of the uterus (the "endometrium") has tissue that is "programmed" to shed when triggered by the hormone shift during menstruation. Endometriosis is when cells from that tissue get OUTSIDE the uterus into your abdominal cavity and do exactly the same thing to other surfaces. Shed. And regenerate. Every cycle.

This is why one of the hallmarks of the disease is symptoms worsening over time, and likely eventual infertility and/or bowel problems as other organs can literally get tangled up by the shed lining that doesn't have anywhere to go, or affected by the cells themselves. Often the surgery used to diagnose the condition can be used to "clean out" any endometrial tissue that the surgeon sees, which can (but doesn't always!) alleviate symptoms.

So what to do about it?

Spread awareness, what this month is for. If you think you might have it, ask your doctor. Get a second or third opinion if necessary. Ask around your family, see if anyone else has the same or similar symptoms. I was fortunate enough to have the family member for reference, and know that HER mother had a suspected case and HER mother had fertility issues. Someone my age on a related branch of the family had no idea and I was their point of reference.

Not much is known about it other than it's genetic, what it is, and how to diagnose it. There are a few leading theories as to causes, but nothing definitive. And by the way! It has been found in cis men born without a uterus at all, so congrats gentlemen! There's a slim possibility you could be intersex in the worst way possible!

But I wanted to end this on a positive note, so I left an asterisk all the way up there to come back to. *Surgery is the only CURRENT way to diagnose endometriosis. There's been a very recent breakthrough in Australia towards diagnosing through a blood test, which has had extremely positive results so far. I don't know enough about medicine to have an idea of a realistic timeline, but it's coming!

My ask and dms are open if anyone has any, and I mean any, questions about my experience with endometriosis <3

hey so it’s march now aka the beginning of endometriosis awareness month and i feel obligated to remind you that debilitatingly painful periods are not normal. if you or someone you know is ending up sick or bedridden every month, you are not crazy and deserve medical attention from someone who will take you seriously

[pupyuj]

dude I've been thinking of g!pwonyoung who is submissive and will literally do anything to fuck you, and would call you mommy typa shi🙏 and she's such a beggar like she would al say please just to get what she wants

g!p sub top mommy's girl wony my favorite thing ever !! oh i love it when you guys know just what to send in my inbox 😍😍

[cw: g!p wonyoung.]

one of the rare times wony would deliberately want to embarrass herself over and over again bcs she can’t get enough of you 🥺 you get your way with her every time bcs she never complains and it was heaven for both of you! 🤭 tell her to do ANYTHING and she'd be on it asap—the goodest of all good girls in the world and she loves it when you make it known to her 🥰🥰

wony definitely goes straight to you after a long day at work! even if you're occupied she would be allll over you, hugging you from behind while whining so cutely in your ear just to get noticed... but even if you took like, fifteen minutes to finally pay attention to her, wony would never touch you inappropriately without your permission! baby doesn't like seeing you mad... she doesn't love punishments too much either so she's as patient and innocent as they come! 🥺

and yes, she would call you "mommy"! wonyoung has such a big mommy kink it's so pathetic... she really just wants to be pampered and spoiled 💕💕 and what better way for you to do that than to take her cock after she asked so nicely? and she's totally a service top... sure, wony gets a little too lost in pleasure when she's fucking you bcs it just feels so unbelievably good to be inside you but at the end of the day, you're her world so making you feel even better than what she was feeling is always her mission! 😳💞

wonyoung is so smart too... she knows every weak spot of yours, knows what exactly drives you crazy, knows what makes you want more... and she exploits all of that bcs she loves you so much and always wants to give you the best time ever when you're with her 🥰 and she doesn't have to ask for praises bcs you're always giving them to her! it astounds her how you can speak while fucking bcs she can barely get a single word out!

there you are, getting fucked so good your brain was going haywire and yet you can still grab wony's jaw, pull her close, and tell her how amazing she was making mommy feel right up against her lips... that was always what made wony cum... but that's okay bcs she has a lot of energy to spare that all for you and you only 😵‍💫

[dreamauri]

♪ — 𝗛𝗔𝗛𝗔 𝗣𝗥𝗔𝗡𝗞𝗘𝗗!! lando norris x  fem! girlfriend! reader (fluff) fic summary . . . because why wouldn't you prank your boyfriend?

( my master list | more of lando norris ) ( requests )

You stretch, a lazy smile on your face as you glance over at Lando. He’s still lying in bed, propped up on his elbows, catching his breath, but his eyes are glued to you with the most intense, bewildered look on his face.

You had just finished a vigorous round of sex, and now . . . well, now it was time for a little fun.

You slowly swing your legs over the side of the bed, making sure to deliberately ignore Lando’s wide, panicked eyes. You grab a random shirt from the floor, straighten it, fold it, and toss it into the laundry basket, all the while acting like absolutely nothing out of the ordinary had just happened.

You walk across the room, tidying up, folding the blanket on the chair, and fluffing up a pillow like it's just a regular day.

Lando’s staring at you in absolute horror, mouth hanging open. He shifts on the bed, his entire posture stiffening like he’s trying to figure out what kind of alternate universe this is.

Finally, after a few agonizing minutes, he speaks. His voice is tight, unsure. “Yn . . . ?”

You turn casually, still not looking at him. “Yeah?”

“Are . . . Are you, uh . . . Are you just gonna . . . clean up? Like nothing happened?”

You finally turn to look at him, and that’s when you see the panic and anxiety in his eyes—the dread written across his face. His hands, which were nervously playing with the sheets, suddenly drop to his lap.

Wait . . .

You suddenly feel a little guilty.

He looks like someone who’s just been told the world’s ending. There’s no denying it: the man’s face is full of genuine concern.

Lando hesitates, his voice barely a whisper. “Yn, was it . . . bad? Am I that bad that . . . you’re just gonna go, you know, clean up instead of . . . cuddle? Or, you know, do some aftercare?”

Your stomach does a little flip, your heart softening at the sight of him, still lying there like he’s been rejected in the worst way possible. You realize exactly how horrible your little prank might have seemed to him.

You walk back to the bed, your face suddenly more serious, and crawl onto the mattress, straddling him. Lando’s eyes are still wide, like he’s waiting for you to tell him the worst news of his life.

“Babe,” you say softly, cupping his face in your hands. “You know I love you, right?”

He nods quickly, still looking terrified. “Y-Yeah, but you just . . . You looked so casual, and I thought I…” He trails off, clearly too embarrassed to finish his sentence.

“Lando,” you say gently, pressing a kiss to his forehead, “I wasn’t ignoring you. I was just pranking you.”

His eyes widen, clearly confused. “A prank?”

You laugh, resting your head on his shoulder. “Yeah, a prank. I wanted to see if you’d freak out because you thought I was too busy to cuddle.”

For a moment, Lando doesn’t say anything. Then, after a beat, he groans and flops back against the pillow, throwing an arm over his eyes.

“You’re a menace,” he mutters, clearly both relieved and embarrassed at once.

You smile, running your fingers through his hair. “But you love me.”

Lando sighs dramatically. “I don’t know. After that stunt? Maybe I should rethink that.”

“Oh please, you know you’re obsessed with me,” you tease, pressing your body closer to his.

He lifts his hand to look at you, raising an eyebrow. “I’m obsessed with cuddles and aftercare, actually.”

You chuckle, wrapping your arms around his neck. “Well, then let’s get to that.”

Lando grins mischievously. “I was thinking more of revenge.” He smirked, flipping you over and hooking your knee above his shoulder.

[victhespookygoat]

Full Transcript Below bc Forbes' Website Sucks:

TRUMP (after a reporter asks if he’s too “aligned” with Putin): If I didn’t align myself with both of them, you’d never have a deal. You want me to say really terrible things about Putin, and then say, ‘Hi Vladimir, how are we doing on the deal?’ That doesn’t work that way. I’m not aligned with Putin, I’m not aligned with anybody, I’m aligned with the United States of America and for the good of the world. I’m aligned with the world and I wanna get this thing over with. You see the hatred he’s got for Putin, it’s very tough for me to make a deal with that kind of hate. He’s got tremendous hatred, and I understand that, but I can tell you the other side isn’t exactly in love with him either. So, it’s not a question of alignment, I have—I’m aligned with the world. I want to get the thing sett—I’m aligned with Europe, I want to see if we can get this thing done. You want me to be tough? I can be tougher than any human being you’ve ever seen, I’d be so tough, but you’re never going to get a deal that way, so that’s the way it goes. Alright, one more question…

PROMOTED

VANCE: Hey, I want to respond to this. So, look, for four years the United States of America, we had a president who stood up at press conferences and talked tough about Vladimir Putin, and then Putin invaded Ukraine and destroyed a significant chunk of the country. The path to peace and the path to prosperity is maybe engaging in diplomacy. We tried the pathway of Joe Biden, of thumping our chest and pretending that the President of the United States’ words mattered more than the President of the United States’ actions. What makes America a good country is America engaging in diplomacy. That’s what President Trump is doing.

ZELENSKYY: Can I ask you?

VANCE: Sure.

ZELENSKYY: Yeah?

VANCE: Yeah.

ZELENSKYY: Okay, he occupied our parts, big parts of Ukraine, part of East and Crimea, so he occupied it in 2014. So, during a lot of years, I’m not speaking about just Biden, but those time was … President Obama, then President Trump, then President Biden, now President Trump and, god bless, now President Trump will stop him. But during 2014, nobody stopped him. He just occupied and took. He killed people, you know? What the contact line—

TRUMP: 2015.

ZELENSKYY: 2014.

VANCE: 2014 to 2015.

TRUMP: Oh, 2014.

ZELENSKYY: Yeah, yeah, yeah, so.

TRUMP: I was not here.

ZELENSKYY: Yeah, but…

VANCE: That’s exactly right.

ZELENSKYY: Yes, but during 2014 til 2022, the situation the same that people have been dying on the contact line. Nobody stopped him. You know that we had conversations with him, a lot of conversations, multilateral conversations. And we signed with him, me, like a new president in 2019, I signed with him the deal. I signed with him, Macron and Merkel, we signed ceasefire. Ceasefire, all of them told me that he will never go, we signed with him a gas contract … Yes, but after that he broke the ceasefire, he killed our people and he didn’t exchange prisoners. We signed the exchange of prisoners, but he didn’t do it. What kind of diplomacy, JD, you are speaking about? What do you mean?

VANCE: I’m talking about the kind of diplomacy that’s going to end the destruction of your country.

ZELENSKYY: Yes, but if you—

VANCE: Mr. President, Mr. President, with respect I think it’s disrespectful for you to come into the Oval Office and try to litigate this in front of the American media. Right now, you guys are going around and forcing conscripts to the front lines because you have manpower problems. You should be thanking the president for trying to bring an end to this conflict.

ZELENSKYY: Have you ever been to Ukraine that you see what problems we have?

VANCE: I have been to—

ZELENSKYY: Come once.

VANCE: I have actually watched and seen the stories and I know what happens is you bring people, you bring them on a propaganda tour, Mr. President. Do you disagree that you’ve had problems bringing people into your military?

ZELENSKYY: We have problems—

VANCE: And do you think that it’s respectful to come to the Oval Office of the United States of America and attack the administration that is trying to prevent the destruction of your country?

ZELENSKYY: A lot of questions. Let’s start from the beginning.

VANCE: Sure.

ZELENSKYY: First of all, during the war, everybody has problems. Even you, but you have nice ocean and don’t feel now, but you’ll feel it in the future. God bless, god bless—

TRUMP: You don’t know that. You don’t know—don’t tell us what we’re gonna feel. We’re trying to solve a problem. Don’t tell us what we’re gonna feel.

ZELENSKYY: I’m not telling you, I’m answering on the question—

TRUMP: Because you’re in no position to dictate that.

VANCE: That’s exactly what you’re doing.

TRUMP: You’re in no position to dictate what we’re gonna feel, we’re going to feel very good. We’re going to feel very good and very strong—

ZELENSKYY: You will feel influence—

TRUMP: You’re right now not in a very good position. You’ve allowed yourself to be in a very bad position and he happens to be right about it.

ZELESKYY: From the very beginning of the war—

TRUMP: You’re not in a good position. You don’t have the cards right now. With us, you start having cards.

ZELENSKYY: I’m not playing cards. [INAUDIBLE] Mr. President, [INAUDIBLE].

[CROSSTALK]

TRUMP: Right now you’re—you’re playing cards, you’re playing cards—you’re gambling with the lives of millions of people. You’re gambling with World War III. You’re gambling with World War III. And what you’re doing is very disrespectful to the country, this country. It’s backed you far more than a lot of people said they should have.

VANCE: Have you said ‘thank you’ once this entire time?

ZELENSKYY: A lot of times.

VANCE: No, in this—

ZELENSKYY: Even today. Even today—

VANCE: No, in this entire meeting. You went to Pennsylvania and campaigned for the opposition in October. Offer some words of appreciation for the United States of America and the president who’s trying to save your country.

ZELENSKYY: Please, you think that if you will speak very loudly about the war—

TRUMP: He’s not speaking loudly. He’s not speaking loudly. Your country’s in big trouble.

ZELENSKYY: Can I? Can I answer?—

TRUMP: Wait a minute. No, no. You’ve done a lot of talking. Your country is in big trouble.

ZELENSKYY: I know. I know.

TRUMP: You’re not winning, you're not winning this. You have a damn good chance of coming out okay because of us.

ZELENSKYY: Mr. President, we are staying in our country, staying strong. From the very beginning of the war we have been alone and we are thankful. I said thanks in this cabinet, [INAUDIBLE], I said thanks—

TRUMP: You haven’t been alone. You haven’t been alone. We gave you—through this stupid president—$350 billion—

ZELENSKYY: You voted for your president.

TRUMP: We gave you military equipment and your men are brave but they had to use our military—if you didn’t have our military equipment, if you didn’t have our military equipment, this war would have been over in two weeks.

ZELENSKYY: In three days, I heard it from Putin, in three days—

TRUMP: Maybe less.

ZELENSKYY: In two weeks, of course—

TRUMP: It’s going to be a very hard thing to do business like this, I tell you.

VANCE: Just say thank you.

ZELENSKYY: I said a lot of times, thank you to American people—

VANCE: Accept that there are disagreements and let’s go litigate those disagreements rather than trying to fight it out in the American media when you’re wrong. We know that you’re wrong.

TRUMP: But you see, I think it’s good for the American people to see what’s going on. I think it’s very important, that’s why I kept this going so long. You have to be thankful—

ZELENSKYY: I’m thankful—

TRUMP: You don’t have the cards. You’re buried there, your people are dying, you’re running low on soldiers—listen. You’re running low on soldiers, it would be a damn good thing. Then you tell us: ‘I don’t want a ceasefire, I don’t want a ceasefire, I want to go, and I want this—.’ Look, if you could get a ceasefire right now, I tell you you’d take it so the bullets stop flying and your men stop getting killed.

ZELENSKYY: Of course, of course we want to stop the war.

TRUMP: But you’re saying you don’t want a ceasefire—

ZELENSKYY: What I said to you—

TRUMP: I want a ceasefire. Because you get a ceasefire faster than an agreement.

ZELENSKYY: With guarantees. Ask our people about ceasefire, what they think. It doesn’t matter for you what—

TRUMP: That wasn’t with me. That wasn’t with me.

[CROSSTALK]

TRUMP: That was with a guy named Biden who is not a smart person—That was with Obama.

ZELENSKYY: That was your president. It was your president—

TRUMP: Excuse me, that was with Obama who gave you sheets, and I gave you javelins.

ZELENSKYY: Yes.

TRUMP: I gave you the javelins to take out all those tanks. Obama gave you sheets. In fact, the statement is: Obama gave sheets and Trump gave javelins. You gotta be more thankful. Because let me tell you, you don’t have the cards. With us, you have the cards. But without us, you don’t have any cards.

REPORTER: One more question…

TRUMP: It's going to be a tough deal to make. Because attitudes have to change.

REPORTER: What if Russia breaks ceasefire? What if Russia breaks [INAUDIBLE]?

TRUMP: What are you saying?

VANCE: She’s asking, ‘what if Russia breaks the ceasefire?’

TRUMP: Well what if they—what if anything! What if a bomb drops on your head right now? Okay? What if they broke it? I don’t know. They broke it with Biden because Biden, they didn’t respect him, they didn’t respect Obama. They respect me. Let me tell you, Putin went through a hell of a lot with me. He went through a phony witch hunt where they used him and Russia—Russia, Russia, Russia, you ever hear of that deal? That was a phony—that was a phony Hunter Biden, Joe Biden scam. Hillary Clinton, shifty Adam Schiff, it was a Democrat scam. And he had to go through that. And he did go through it and we didn’t end up in a war. He went through it, he was accused of all that stuff—he had nothing to do with it. It came out of Hunter Biden’s bathroom. It came out of Hunter Biden’s bedroom. It was disgusting. And then they said, ‘Oh, oh, the laptop from hell was made by Russia.’ The 51 agents, the whole thing was a scam, and he had to put up with that. He was being accused of all that stuff. All I can say is this: He might’ve broken deals with Obama, and Bush, and he might’ve broken them with Biden. He did, maybe, maybe he didn’t—I don’t know what happened. But he didn’t break them with me. He wants to make a deal. I don’t know if he can make a deal.

TRUMP: The problem is I’ve empowered you [looks at Zelenskyy] to be a tough guy. And I don’t think you’d be a tough guy without the United States. And your people are very brave.

ZELENSKYY: Thank you.

TRUMP: But you’re either going to make a deal, or we’re out. And if we’re out, you’ll fight it out. I don’t think it’s going to be pretty, but you’ll fight it out. But you don’t have the cards. But once we sign that deal, you’re in a much better position. But you’re not acting at all thankful, and that’s not a nice thing. I’ll be honest, that’s not a nice thing.

TRUMP: Alright, I think we’ve seen enough, what do you think? This is going to be great television, I will say that.

the transcript btw. It was hard to make it out on the video because of the blowhards yelling and me feeling incandescently blind and deaf with rage

oh, to have a leader with the moral fiber and strong backbone that Zelenskyy has

[frownyalfred]

I'm sorry, but the whole concept of "Bob from Gotham, Regular Guy" has seized my brain, simply because of the whole idea of how the Batfam gets to know him.

At first, it's coincidence, the capes having to save this guy over and over. And then it becomes curiosity/concern-why IS this guy at all of these crime scenes? Is he a meta, a villain, a vigilante in the making? This leads to the investigation, and discovering that, no, he's none of that, he is exactly what he appears to be-a normal dude, who just so happens to be caught up in weird shit. This leads to the paranoia that it's all a deep cover op, that "Bob" is actually a carefully laid plot, until it's disproven. Then, it's "is he cursed?" and a magic user (or two or three) is brought in to check, and no, Bob isn't cursed-he's just...unlucky? The universe hates him, maybe? But no, not cursed.

It's after this point where the capes are all exasperated by him showing up, or conversely, they start to build a relationship with them. Not like he's a friend, but how you know the guy who is in the coffee shop every morning at the same time: "Hey Bob, how's it going?" "Oh hey Spoiler, I'm alright. Tied up in a hostage situation, but, ya know, it's Gotham on a Tuesday. You catch the game last night?" "Ugh, yeah. Friggin' Meteors." That sort of thing.

I love this so much. He’s just trying his best and keeps ending up exactly in the middle of things. He’s got kids and a wife at home, he can’t deal with this right now! Susan’s making spaghetti tonight, can you please untie me?

[lila-lou]

✨Age gap crush - Pt. 1/2✨

Summary: Jensen froze—biggest age gap crush? Jared smirked, already knowing the answer. Because Jensen didn’t do attachments. But with you? He already had.

-requested-

Pairing: Jensen x Reader

Warnings: 18+ only! Smut, Language

Word Count: 6341

A/N: English isn’t my first language, please be lenient. 🩷

The hotel room was quiet, except for the faint hum of traffic outside and the soft rustling of sheets behind you. Stepping out of the bathroom, steam curled around you as the cooler air of the room brushed against your damp skin. The towel wrapped tightly around your body felt like the only barrier between you and the weight of his gaze.

Jensen was lying on the bed, one arm tucked lazily behind his head, the other resting against his bare stomach. The soft morning light cast shadows over his toned chest, highlighting the ridges of muscle beneath his skin. His green eyes, sharp and amused, traced you slowly—like he had all the time in the world.

A smirk tugged at his lips. “Well, good morning to me”, he murmured, voice thick with sleep and something else—something that sent a shiver down your spine.

You tightened your grip on the towel, swallowing the warmth creeping up your neck. “Enjoying the view?”, you muttered, trying to sound unaffected.

He chuckled, low and husky, shifting slightly but never breaking his gaze. “Oh, absolutely. Best way to wake up”.

Your stomach twisted at the way he was looking at you—like he knew exactly what he was doing, exactly how flustered you were.

You cleared your throat, the towel still clutched tightly in your grasp. "I thought you'd be gone by now", you muttered, eyes flicking toward the digital clock on the nightstand—but the numbers blurred together. You had no idea what time it was.

Jensen’s smirk deepened. "Didn’t have the heart to leave you just yet", he drawled, stretching out like he had no place to be, no convention to rush off to. "Besides, you looked too damn peaceful earlier. Didn’t want to wake you".

You scoffed, rolling your eyes to mask the way your stomach flipped. Peaceful wasn’t the right word. Wrecked, maybe. Spent.

Last night had been… intense. The kind of night that left your body sore in the best possible way, your mind hazy, your legs barely functioning by the time he'd finally let you rest. And now, standing here, the memory of his hands, his mouth, his body pressed against yours—it all came rushing back so vividly you had to fight the urge to squeeze your thighs together.

Jensen noticed. Of course, he did. His eyes darkened, amusement flickering beneath them like he was reading every damn thought in your head. "You okay there, sweetheart?". His voice was smooth, teasing.

You huffed, turning toward the dresser for something—anything—to distract yourself. "I don’t even know what time it is", you admitted, your voice quieter this time. "You really should be gone. The convention—".

"Still got time". His voice was lazy, like he didn’t have an entire schedule waiting for him. "And you really think I’d leave without a proper goodbye?".

This—whatever this was—wasn’t supposed to feel so dangerous. The two of you had set the rules from the start. No public outings. No red carpets. No standing in any kind of spotlight.

After all, he had enough attention on him—especially after the divorce. He didn’t need the world picking apart his personal life, and neither did you. It worked this way. Just the two of you, in stolen nights like this.

But mornings like this? Where he stayed longer than he should, watching you like you were the only thing worth his time?

Those were the moments that scared you.

And when Jensen sat up, his bare chest shifting with the movement, his smirk softening into something almost… fond, you knew you were in trouble.

"C´mere", he murmured, patting the space beside him.

You swallowed hard. You should tell him to get dressed, to go. To remind him of the agreement.

But your body had other plans.

And Jensen knew it, too.

You hesitated as you reminded yourself what this was supposed to be. Casual. Private. Simple.

But Jensen made it impossible to keep things simple.

The way he looked at you—like he had all the patience in the world, like he knew you’d give in before you even did—was downright dangerous. You hated that he was right.

Slowly, reluctantly, you moved toward the bed, stopping just short of where he was sitting. His gaze flickered down to your legs, still damp from the shower, before dragging back up to meet your eyes. He reached out, fingers ghosting along the edge of your towel, not tugging—just there—a silent invitation.

"You’re thinking too much", he murmured, voice low, rough from sleep.

You let out a small, breathy laugh, shaking your head. "Maybe because I should be thinking", you shot back, but you didn’t step away.

Jensen’s smirk returned, but there was something softer beneath it. Something more dangerous than the teasing. "Tell me you don’t want me here", he challenged, his hand resting on your hip now, warm and steady. "And I’ll go".

You parted your lips, inhaling as if you were actually about to say the words. You knew he’d keep his word. He always did.

But you didn’t want him to go.

You wanted this—the way his presence wrapped around you, the way his voice sent shivers down your spine, the way his hands on your body made everything else disappear.

That’s what scared you the most.

Jensen tilted his head, waiting. Not pushing, not rushing. Just waiting for you to be honest with yourself.

And you hated that you broke so easily.

Instead of answering, you exhaled shakily and let your knee press onto the mattress beside him, crawling up just enough for him to lean back slightly, welcoming you. His hands slid up your thighs, warm and familiar, but his eyes never left yours.

"That’s what I thought", he murmured, pulling you onto his lap, your towel slipping just enough for his fingers to dip beneath it.

Your stomach clenched. "You’re an ass", you muttered, but there was no bite to it.

Jensen chuckled, his lips grazing your jaw as his grip tightened, anchoring you to him. "Yeah, but you like me anyway".

And you hated that he was right about that, too.

Your breath hitched the moment you felt it—him—hot and hard beneath you, pressed insistently against the thin barrier of your towel. A sharp contrast to the teasing smirk still tugging at his lips, like he wasn’t fully acknowledging just how much you could feel him right now.

But he knew. Of course, he knew.

Your hands instinctively gripped his shoulders, fingers pressing into the warm, firm muscle beneath your palms. He was still naked, still radiating heat, and the moment your hips shifted—just the slightest bit—the friction sent a sharp pulse of heat straight through you.

Jensen groaned softly, low in his throat, his hands tightening around your thighs. "Shit", he muttered, voice raspier now, thick with something that wasn’t just amusement anymore.

You swallowed hard, pulse thrumming against your skin. "You should be getting ready", you murmured, though your voice lacked conviction, breathless as it was.

Jensen hummed, tilting his head, his lips brushing your jaw, his stubble rough against your sensitive skin. "Mmm. Could say the same for you", he countered, his fingers toying with the edge of your towel. "But here you are. On top of me".

Your stomach flipped, your thighs squeezing instinctively around his waist. He was right there, and your body knew it, heat pooling low in your belly, thighs already aching from the way last night had left you.

His hands slid up, tracing the curves of your waist beneath the towel, moving slow, unhurried, like he had all the time in the world. "Y’know", he murmured against your skin, voice dropping lower, rougher, "if you’re really worried about me being late, maybe you shouldn’t be sitting on my dick right now".

A sharp exhale left you, your fingers flexing against his shoulders. "Jensen—".

"What?". His lips ghosted over your neck, fingers finally gripping your hips properly now, rolling you against him just enough to make your breath catch. His cock pressed right where you needed it, even through the towel, and suddenly, your brain short-circuited.

You weren’t sure who moved first—if it was him guiding you, or your own body betraying you—but the moment your hips rocked, the friction made your nerves spark, made heat flood your core.

Jensen groaned again, this time deeper, almost gritted, his fingers pressing bruises into your skin. "Yeah", he muttered, breath warm against your ear. "Exactly".

You hated how easily he ruined you. Hated how you didn’t stop, how you didn’t want to stop.

"Fuck you", you breathed, but you were already rolling your hips again, chasing that slow, delicious friction, the warmth pooling between your legs unbearable now.

Jensen laughed, the sound vibrating against your throat. "You already did, sweetheart", he teased, nipping just below your jaw. "And by the way you’re moving? You’re about to do it again".

With a sharp tug, the towel was gone, slipping from your body and pooling somewhere on the sheets beneath you. A rush of cool air ghosted over your skin, but it did nothing to quell the heat burning between your thighs.

Jensen's hands were everywhere—firm, claiming—gripping your waist, sliding down the curve of your back, fingers pressing into your hips like he was anchoring himself. His green eyes darkened as he took you in, his gaze flickering from your lips to the bare expanse of your chest, down to where your bodies were about to connect.

“Fuck baby”, he muttered, his voice thick with something between admiration and desperation. “You’re gonna kill me”.

One hand slid between your bodies, guiding himself to where you were already dripping, already throbbing for him. The swollen head of his cock nudged against your entrance, teasing, pressing, the sensation enough to steal your breath.

Jensen sucked in a sharp inhale. "Fuck—you're still so sensitiv from last night", he groaned, his voice strained now, his fingers tightening their grip on your waist.

Your stomach clenched at his words, your thighs trembling around him. "Maybe if you hadn’t—". You gasped as he pushed in just a little, stretching you open with maddening slowness. "Hadn’t wrecked me so hard, I wouldn't be".

Jensen let out a low, breathy chuckle, but his control was thinning—you could see it in the way his jaw tensed, feel it in the way his fingers flexed against your hips. "Oh, sweetheart", he murmured, his other hand sliding up your side, palming your breast before his fingers curled around the back of your neck, tugging you down. "That was barely me wrecking you".

And with that—he pulled you down onto him, fully, completely, stretching you inch by inch until he was buried to the hilt inside you.

A ragged gasp left your lips, your body clenching around him, adjusting to the sudden, overwhelming fullness.

"Ouw—", you choked out, nails digging into his shoulders.

Jensen groaned, his head falling back against the pillows for a moment, his fingers gripping your hips hard enough to bruise. “Fuck, baby. Look at you”. His voice was wrecked, strained with restraint, with the effort it took for him to not move just yet.

Your breath shuddered, your body trembling at the way he filled you, at how perfectly he stretched you. Every inch of him throbbed inside you, heat coiling at the base of your spine, your thighs quivering where they straddled his hips.

"Jensen", you breathed, barely able to form words, your nails dragging down his chest.

That was all it took.

His fingers flexed against your waist, and then he moved.

A slow, deliberate roll of his hips that sent blinding pleasure spiraling through your core.

You whimpered, your hands flying to his chest for support, but he didn’t stop, didn’t give you a chance to catch your breath. He lifted you just enough before pulling you back down, forcing you to take every inch of him, again and again, harder, deeper, until the only thing spilling from your lips were broken, gasping moans.

"Fuck, that’s it", he gritted out, watching the way your body took him, the way your back arched, your mouth parted in pleasure. His grip on your waist tightened as his hips snapped up, meeting you with every downward roll, sending sharp jolts of electricity through your veins.

"You feel so good", he growled, his voice raw, his fingers possessive as they dug into your skin. "So fucking tight. Like you were made for me".

Your head tipped back, pleasure burning through you, your body already starting to tremble. The grinding, the pace, the deep, deep thrusts—it was too much, and not enough all at once.

"Jensen—". His name spilled from your lips like a plea.

He grinned, though it was more of a snarl, his control slipping. "That’s right, sweetheart. Say my name while I ruin you again".

And he did.

Jensen's grip tightened as he slammed up into you, pulling you down to meet each thrust, forcing you to take him deeper, harder, rougher. The stretch was overwhelming, the pleasure devastating, your body reduced to nothing but fire and sensation as he filled you over and over again.

Your fingers clawed at his chest, nails dragging against the firm ridges of muscle, desperate for something—anything—to ground you. But there was nothing to hold onto. Nothing but him.

"Jensen". His name left your lips in a gasping, broken moan, your head tipping back as your body clenched around him.

He groaned, the sound wrecked, his hands sliding from your waist to your thighs, lifting you slightly before slamming you back down onto his cock. "Fuck—just like that", he muttered, his breath coming ragged now, but his pace never slowed. If anything, he was getting rougher.

Pleasure shot up your spine, white-hot and blinding, your nerves on the edge of snapping. Every thrust hit deep, hitting that spot that had your toes curling, your stomach clenching, the coil inside you winding impossibly tight.

Jensen noticed. Of course, he did.

"Shit, you’re close already", he rasped, voice thick with pride, with something dangerously close to obsession as he watched you, completely undone on top of him.

You whimpered in response, your nails digging into his skin, your thighs starting to tremble.

He smirked—dark, satisfied, in control—as he sat up suddenly, one arm wrapping around your waist, the other gripping your jaw. His lips crashed against yours, swallowing your moans as he thrust up, sharp and precise, stealing the last bit of composure you had left.

"You gonna come for me, sweetheart?", he murmured against your mouth, his breath hot, teasing. His hand slid down between your bodies, fingers finding your clit, rubbing in slow, deliberate circles that had you shattering within seconds.

The orgasm slammed into you with a force that left you breathless, your body tensing, then shaking apart, pleasure pulsing through every nerve ending. A strangled cry tore from your throat as you clenched around him, waves of heat rolling through you as he kept fucking you through it, dragging it out, making you feel every second of it.

"That’s it", Jensen groaned, voice gritted, strained, his hands bruising as he held you still, as he thrust up one last time, burying himself deep. A guttural sound tore from his throat as he spilled inside you, his whole body tensing beneath you, pleasure rolling through him in hot, shuddering waves.

For a moment, the world spun, the only thing grounding you was him, his grip on you, his breath ragged against your skin.

Silence settled between you, thick and heavy, the aftermath still buzzing in the air. Jensen didn’t move, still buried inside you, his arms still wrapped around your body like he wasn’t ready to let go just yet.

And maybe—just maybe—you weren’t either.

But the moment couldn’t last.

He sighed against your neck, pressing the faintest kiss to your damp skin before finally leaning back, his hands gentler now, smoothing over your sides. "If I wasn’t late before", he muttered, voice still rough with exhaustion and satisfaction, "I definitely am now".

A weak laugh escaped you, your forehead dropping to his shoulder. "That’s your fault", you murmured, your body still tingling from the aftershocks.

Jensen chuckled, but instead of answering, he slid his hands up your back, slow, lazy, his fingers tracing soft patterns against your skin.

And that? That was what scared you the most.

Not the sex. Not the sneaking around.

But this—the way he lingered, the way he touched you even when he didn’t have to. The way he stayed.

Because deep down, you knew…

You were breaking all your own rules.

The loud pounding at the door jolted you from the haze of aftershocks and warmth, panic surging through your system.

“Ackles!”, Jared’s voice boomed through the room, followed by another aggressive set of knocks. “We’re fucking late! Get your ass out here!”.

Your entire body stiffened, still perched on top of Jensen, still connected, your thighs sticky, your skin hot from the lingering heat of what had just happened.

Jensen groaned dramatically, his head falling back against the pillow, one lazy hand brushing over his face. “Fuck, Jared”, he muttered, completely unbothered, like he hadn’t just fucked you into oblivion and left you a trembling mess.

Your eyes widened, panic gripping your chest. “Oh my God—”. You scrambled, instinct taking over, hands bracing against Jensen’s chest as you tried to get off him, but his grip tightened.

“Not so fast, sweetheart”. His voice was low, smug, his fingers digging into your waist just enough to make you shiver.

Your heart slammed in your chest. “Jensen—he’s right there!”, you hissed, eyes flicking frantically to the door as Jared knocked again, harder.

“Jensen! If you don’t open this damn door in ten seconds, I’m coming in! I will use my keycard, asshole!”.

Jensen just smirked, his other hand trailing down your thigh, so slow, so possessive, like he wasn’t at all worried about getting caught.

“Let him”, he muttered, his voice gravelly, his hips rolling up just a fraction, making you gasp, clench around him involuntarily.

Your stomach flipped, a sharp pulse of pleasure shooting through you even as your mind screamed in panic.

“You’re insane”, you whispered sharply, shoving at his bare chest, your pulse racing, the heat of him still inside you, still filling you so perfectly.

Jensen laughed, low and smug, but he finally released you, letting you scramble off him just as another aggressive knock rattled the door.

You stumbled, nearly falling, your legs still weak, your thighs still aching from the way he’d ruined you minutes ago. You barely managed to grab your discarded towel, wrapping it around yourself in record time as you bolted toward the bathroom doorway, trying to make yourself invisible.

Jensen, meanwhile?

Completely unbothered.

He stretched slowly, rolling out of bed with a lazy ease that made it clear he wasn’t in any kind of hurry.

Another pounding knock.

“Jensen!”.

Jensen rolled his eyes, dragging a hand down his face, clearly in no rush to deal with the six-foot-four nuisance on the other side of the door.

Little did you know, Jensen had already told Jared about you a couple of days ago. He’d expected this moment, knew it was only a matter of time before you got caught sneaking around.

But seeing you panic like this?

Adorable.

So, he let you squirm.

He smirked to himself as he tugged his shirt over his head, deliberately taking his time, knowing full well that you were still pressed against the bathroom door, heartbeat racing, eyes wide with the kind of panic he found way too entertaining.

Another pounding knock.

"Jensen! Open the damn door, or I’m—".

Finally, finally, Jensen swung it open, arms crossed over his chest as he leaned against the frame, giving Jared a bored look.

"Jesus, Padalecki", he muttered. "Ever heard of patience?".

Jared’s eyes narrowed, already looking pissed as hell, his gaze flicking over Jensen’s still-rumpled appearance—messy hair, swollen lips, trunks thrown on in a half-assed attempt to look presentable.

Jared’s brows lifted.

"Oh", he muttered, crossing his arms. "You definitely weren’t sleeping".

Jensen just grinned. "Didn’t say I was".

Jared squinted, eyes flicking past him into the room. Jensen angled his body slightly, blocking just enough of the view to keep you hidden, even though—let’s be real, the entire scene was screaming of exactly what had happened.

The unmade bed. The disheveled sheets. The fucking smell.

Jared let out a long, slow sigh, rubbing a hand over his face. "Dude".

Jensen smirked, playing dumb. "What?".

Jared’s lips twitched, like he wanted to laugh but was too annoyed to let himself. "You serious right now?".

Jensen shrugged. "Look, man, if you’re mad I didn’t invite you, just say so".

Jared grimaced, shoving his shoulder. "Oh, fuck off".

Jensen chuckled, but before Jared could barrel past him into the room, he leaned in slightly, lowering his voice just enough.

"Don’t be a dick", he murmured. "You already know who’s in there".

Jared stilled.

His brows shot up, just slightly, before his expression shifted—less annoyed, more intrigued.

"Oh, so you finally told her I know?".

Jensen’s smirk deepened.

"…Not exactly".

Jared let out an exasperated groan, dragging his hands down his face. "You’re such an asshole".

Jensen grinned, clearly having way too much fun with this. "Yeah, but I’m your asshole".

"Unfortunately", Jared muttered, shaking his head. He peered past him again, curiosity flickering behind his eyes. "So, are you gonna let her out, or are we pretending she doesn’t exist?".

Jensen chuckled, finally turning his head toward the bathroom.

"Sweetheart?". His voice was sickeningly amused, way too pleased with himself. "You gonna come say hi, or you planning on hiding in there all day?".

You froze, heart pounding, throat suddenly dry as hell.

Jared knew?

Jared fucking knew?

And Jensen never told you?!

You were going to kill him.

Slowly.

You exhaled sharply, gathering yourself, before stepping out of the bathroom, towel still wrapped around you, your face heating instantly when Jared’s knowing gaze landed on you.

Jared blinked.

Then, with zero hesitation, he smirked.

"Oh". He nodded, fighting back a laugh. "Yeah. That definitely tracks".

Jensen’s grin widened, watching the way you glared daggers at him before crossing your arms, clearly one second away from launching something at his head.

"You knew", you said flatly, eyes locked onto Jared.

Jared snorted. "Oh, yeah. Jensen spilled days ago. Thought you knew".

Your eyes snapped back to Jensen, murder flashing behind them.

"You are so fucking dead".

Jensen grinned like a bastard, completely unbothered.

"Yeah, yeah", he murmured, stepping closer, hands slipping around your waist as he pressed a slow, teasing kiss to your temple, just to piss you off more. "Still worth it, though".

You swore you saw red.

And Jared?

Jared just laughed his ass off.

Eventually, Jared shifting his weight before casually holding out his hand toward you.

"Well", he said, smirking, "since we’re not pretending you don’t exist anymore, I guess I should properly introduce myself—".

But before you could take it, his expression shifted, realization hitting him like a freight train. His hand hovered in midair for a second before his face twisted in horror, and he yanked it back.

"Actually, you know what—never mind". He grimaced, shaking his head, his face scrunching up like he just walked into something disgusting. "I just remembered exactly what you two were doing before I knocked".

Your face flamed, heat rushing to your ears as the memory of exactly what had just happened surged through your mind.

Jensen, meanwhile?

Losing his damn mind.

He let out a loud, unrestrained laugh, gripping his stomach as he leaned against the doorframe, fully enjoying the absolute mess unfolding in front of him.

"Wow, Padalecki", he mused, mockingly wiping a fake tear from his eye. "And here I thought you were all about bonding".

Jared shot him a flat look, clearly unamused. "Yeah, I’m good, thanks. No need to get that close".

Jensen just grinned, slinging an arm lazily around your shoulders, pulling you closer as his fingers toyed with the edge of your towel—just to mess with you.

You immediately tensed, glaring up at him. "Jensen", you hissed through clenched teeth, shifting slightly, hyper-aware of just how little was covering you.

He winked, voice dropping.

"Relax, sweetheart", he murmured, lips brushing your ear, "not like Jared hasn’t already figured out how thoroughly I just fucked you".

Your entire face ignited, heat rushing through you so violently you had to physically shove him away.

"Jensen!", you sputtered, barely resisting the urge to smack him.

Jared groaned loudly, rubbing his temples. "For the love of God, can we go now?".

Jensen let out a dramatic sigh, rolling his shoulders like getting up and leaving was the biggest inconvenience in the world. "Yeah, yeah. Just lemme grab a shower real quick", he muttered, stretching. "Need to get her off my body first".

Your face somehow got even hotter, and Jared immediately threw up his hands.

"NOPE", he declared, turning around so fast it was almost cartoonish. "I refuse to hear another goddamn word. I will be downstairs, waiting, pretending none of this ever happened".

And just like that, he was gone, muttering something under his breath as he disappeared down the hall.

The second the door clicked shut, you spun on Jensen, smacking his arm hard enough to make him chuckle.

"You are such an asshole", you snapped, mortified beyond belief.

Jensen just laughed, stepping closer, hands gripping your waist again.

"Yeah", he murmured, pressing a slow, teasing kiss to your lips, "but you like me anyway".

Only ten minutes later, Jensen was moving around the room, hastily buckling his belt, his shirt slightly wrinkled, his hair damp from the world’s fastest shower.

You were still sitting on the bed, still half-naked, towel barely hanging onto you, watching him with a mix of amusement and exhaustion.

"Never seen you move this fast", you teased, tilting your head as he grabbed his SnapBack off the dresser and shoved it on backwards, clearly prioritizing speed over style.

Jensen shot you a look, smirking. "Yeah, well, someone made me late", he murmured, pointedly, as he reached for his watch—

Only to realize you had already picked it up.

You held it out lazily, wrist dangling over the edge of the bed, watching as he stepped closer, his fingers brushing yours as he took it.

That little touch—as brief as it was—made your stomach flip, and suddenly, you were too aware of the way he was looking at you.

Like he was thinking about throwing you back onto the bed all over again.

Like he was debating if being late was really that big of a deal.

You swallowed, trying to keep your voice steady. "Better hurry, or Jared’s gonna come back up here and kick the door down".

Jensen exhaled sharply, reluctantly strapping the watch onto his wrist, still smirking like a bastard. "That man needs to take a breath. It’s not like they’re starting without me".

"You mean the convention where thousands of people are literally waiting for you?".

He shrugged, completely unbothered, but then his eyes flicked back to you—still sitting there, still wrapped in nothing but a towel, still looking too goddamn tempting for your own good.

His smirk turned dangerous.

"You’re really not making it easy to leave, sweetheart", he muttered, fingers trailing lightly along your bare thigh, like he was considering being just a little later.

Your breath hitched, body still sensitive from before, but you quickly swatted his hand away, sending him a warning glare.

"Nope". You shook your head. "You’re already late because of me. I am not responsible for you missing your flight next".

Jensen chuckled, hands up in mock surrender, but you could see it—the way he hesitated, the way he looked at you like he wanted to stay just a little longer.

And that?

That was dangerous.

Because you couldn’t let this become more than what it was.

So you forced a smirk, tilting your head as you leaned back against the pillows, stretching slightly.

"Besides", you murmured, voice laced with mock innocence, "I think you’ve had more than enough of me for one morning".

Jensen’s jaw ticked, his smirk faltering just for a second before his gaze darkened, his fingers twitching like he wanted to reach for you again.

But instead, he exhaled sharply, shaking his head with a grin, before taking a deliberate step back.

"Yeah, we’ll see about that", he muttered, winking before turning toward the door.

And as he grabbed his keycard and slipped out, leaving you alone in that messy, wrecked hotel room—

You had a feeling he was right.

This wasn’t over.

Not even close.

The silence in the room was deafening now that Jensen was gone.

You sat there for a moment, towel still wrapped around you, staring at the mess of sheets, the faint imprint of where he had just been. The room still smelled like him—his cologne, the heat of his skin, the lingering scent of sex and something more.

And yet, all you could think about was what had just happened.

Jensen told Jared about you.

Your stomach twisted at the realization, your fingers gripping the edge of the towel tighter.

Why?

The two of you weren’t even labeled. That had been his rule, not yours.

No commitments. No expectations. Just this. Stolen moments, hotel rooms, late-night calls that always ended the same way.

Jensen had made it clear from the start—he wasn’t looking to settle down again, not after everything with Danneel. You were his secret affair or whatever the hell this was.

So why the fuck did he tell Jared?

Jensen wasn’t the type to just share information for no reason. Jared was his best friend, sure, but that didn’t mean Jensen had to tell him everything.

Especially about you.

And yet—he had.

Days ago, apparently. And he hadn’t even mentioned it. Hadn’t even warned you.

Your heart did a weird, uneasy flip, frustration creeping up your spine.

What did it mean?

Was it just Jensen being careless?

Or was it something more?

You hated that the question lingered, that it stuck in your chest, leaving you restless in the empty bed. Because no matter how much you told yourself this was casual, simple, no strings attached—

Jensen had just tangled you up in something you weren’t prepared for.

And you weren’t sure what the hell to do about it.

Inside the car, the steady hum of the road filled the space as Cliff sat in the front seat, engaged in casual conversation with the driver. The ride to the convention center was smooth, quiet—until Jared turned to Jensen, his voice low, casual, but laced with curiosity.

"She’s pretty young, huh?".

Jensen’s jaw ticked, his fingers drumming lazily against his thigh as he leaned back against the seat. He didn’t react right away, just let the words sit in the air for a second before exhaling through his nose.

He knew what Jared was doing.

"She’s twenty-five", Jensen muttered, glancing out the window like that was supposed to end the conversation.

Jared tilted his head, not buying it. "So… twenty-one-year age gap?". His brows lifted slightly, his tone neutral, but Jensen knew him too well.

"Jesus", Jensen grumbled, running a hand through his damp hair, still backwards in the damn SnapBack because he hadn’t even bothered fixing it properly. "Thanks for the math, professor".

Jared smirked but didn’t drop it. "I mean… it’s kinda a thing, dude", he said, shifting slightly to look at him. "Not saying it’s bad. Just… different for you".

Jensen didn’t respond immediately, but the muscle in his jaw twitched again.

Because yeah, Jared was right.

It was different.

Jensen wasn’t blind. He knew people would raise eyebrows if they knew. Twenty-one years. That was a big gap, no matter how he spun it. And yeah, you were young, but you weren´t a kid—you were smart, independent, and didn’t take his shit.

And yet, that wasn’t the part that bothered him.

It was the fact that Jared was bringing it up at all.

Which meant he noticed something.

Jensen sighed, shifting in his seat, still staring out the window. "She’s not some kid, man", he muttered, rubbing his jaw. "She knows what this is. I’m not leading her on".

Jared made a small humming sound, still watching him. "Right".

Jensen glanced at him, eyes narrowing slightly. "What?".

Jared shrugged, tone even. "Nothing", A beat of silence, then— "Just saying, if it’s really nothing, you wouldn’t have told me about her".

Jensen’s stomach clenched, but he kept his face neutral.

"Thought you’d figure it out anyway", he muttered, shrugging. "You always do".

Jared huffed a quiet laugh, shaking his head. "Yeah. But you never tell me unless you want me to know".

And there it was.

Jensen’s fingers flexed against his knee, his teeth pressing together slightly, but he didn’t argue.

Because Jared was right.

Again.

And that?

That was the part that fucked with him the most.

Jared sensed the difference immediately.

It was subtle, something most people wouldn’t catch—but Jared knew Jensen too well.

During the double photo ops, Jensen was usually his usual self—smiling, laughing, making fans feel comfortable. But there was always something else, something second nature to him.

He looked.

Jensen always checked out the women who caught his interest, just a quick glance, a flick of his green eyes as if gauging if they were worth a second look.

He’d done it for years.

Hell, even when he was married to Danneel, he still had that instinct—never acting on it, never disrespectful, but the habit was there.

But this time?

Nothing.

Jensen’s gaze never lingered. Never even flickered to anything other than the camera, the fan he was greeting, or whatever dumbass joke Jared was cracking beside him.

Not once did he do the subtle once-over. Not once did he let his eyes wander, even briefly.

Jared took note.

He took a lot of notes.

Especially when, during a break between photo ops, Jensen pulled out his phone, his expression shifting just slightly—a look that Jared had never seen Jensen wear while texting someone.

Not some smug grin like he was setting up a fun night. Not some casual response like he didn’t care.

This was different. This was soft.

Jared leaned over slightly, trying to get a glimpse. "Who’s got you smiling like that?", he teased.

Jensen immediately locked the screen, tucking his phone away without so much as a word.

And that?

That spoke volumes.

Jared smirked to himself, shaking his head.

"Yeah", he muttered under his breath. "That’s what I thought".

The panel was going smoothly—plenty of laughs, plenty of inside jokes, the usual back-and-forth banter that fans ate up. Jensen and Jared had been doing this for so long it was second nature at this point.

But then, the question happened.

A fan stepped up to the mic. “What’s the biggest age gap crush you’ve ever had?”.

Jensen froze for a second, his brows knitting together as he tilted his head.

He was clearly trying to decipher the question, his brain gearing up for the wrong interpretation.

“I don’t know.. I don’t… I mean..I didn’t really have like.. uh.. crushes on celebrities when I was… I was too busy…“, he mumbled, still trying to piece it together.

Jared, standing beside him, instantly sensed the opportunity.

He grinned, just barely, leaning into his mic. “Doesn’t have to be a celebrity”.

The moment the words left his mouth, Jensen stiffened.

It was so fast, so subtle, but Jared caught it.

“Well”, Jensen started, but Jared interrupted him. “I‘m gonna answer for him“.

“Oh, great”, Jensen muttered, taking a long, slow sip of his coffee, like he was bracing himself for whatever the hell was about to come out of Jared’s mouth.

Jared, still grinning like a smug bastard, paused for dramatic effect, scanning the audience before leaning forward again.

“He has… he currently has.. a crush.. on somebody who is… ”, he drawled, dragging it out.

Jensen’s entire body tensed.

His eyes flicked with panic, just for a second—the kind of split-second panic that screamed oh, shit, I just got caught.

And that reaction?

Worth every damn second.

Jared barely bit back a laugh as he pivoted, fast as hell, finishing the sentence smoothly.

“34 years younger and 31 years younger”, He nodded dramatically. “And they’re his daughters”.

The audience roared with laughter and `aaaww´s´ completely missing the tiny moment that had just unfolded.

Jensen exhaled through his nose, his jaw clenching, before leaning into his mic with a deadpan look.

“What he said!”, Jensen quickly shot and earning more laughter from the fans.

———————————

A/N: Please let me know what you think.🥰 

-

Taglist: @blackcherrywhiskey @baby19sthings @suckitands33 @spnfamily-j2 @lyarr24 @deans-baby-momma @reignsboy19 @kawaii-arfid-memes @mekkencspony @lovziy @artemys-ackles @fitxgrld @libby99hb @lovelyvirtualperson @a-lil-pr1ncess @nancymcl @the-last-ry @spndeanwinchesterlvr @hobby27 @themarebarroww @kr804573 @impala67rollingthroughtown @deans-queen @deadlymistletoe @selfdestructionandrhum @utyblyn @winchesterwild78 @jackles010378 @chirazsstuff @foxyjwls007 @smoothdogsgirl @woooonau @whimsyfinny @freyabear @laaadygisbooornex3 @quietgirll75 @perpetualabsurdity @pughsexual @berryblues46 @deanwinchestersgirl8734 @kr804573 @iloveeveryoneyoureamazing @iloveeveryoneyoureamazing @barnes70stark @roseblue373 @shanimallina87 @ascarriel @deanwinchesters67impala @thebiggerbear @quietgirll75 @barnes70stark @kellyls04 @spxideyver @ralilda @americanvenom13 @ozwriterchick

[fairyhaos]

❖ kiss your heart // xu minghao

minghao x f!reader, 1.1k+ words

tags: established relationship, both xmh + yn are RICH rich, fluff, kissing, marriage/proposal talks, minghao is literally so in love omfg

warnings: pet names (angel, sweetheart)

notes: literally me rambling about rich + devoted minghao with absolutely no direction planned and i think it's super obvious HELPP but it does not matter !! ur honor i luv these 2 theyre so sassy smitten and it devastates me

“you’re actually the worst person i’ve ever met.”

you glare at your boyfriend as he gets out of the driver’s seat, walks around the front of the parked car and opens your door for you. he’s still smiling that faintly smug smile that’s been on his stupidly handsome face ever since you left the restaurant, and you hate it.

“sweetheart,” minghao says, taking hold of your hand and helping you out of the car, “it’s really no big deal.”

you scoff, rolling your eyes. releasing minghao’s hand, you deposit your purse into his waiting palm and flounce away, across the car park and to the apartment building doors.

minghao struggles to hold back a laugh as he trails after you. “y/n. you’re not truly mad, are you?”

“of course i’m truly mad,” you huff. “you said i could pay for our date this time.” 

during the five years you’ve been dating minghao, he’s taken you on a whole variety of incredible dates. from the impromptu long weekend to paris to the days where you just go to the restaurant down the block for dinner, minghao has never failed to take care of you and always pays for your meal.

any other person would be flattered to have such a rich and devoted boyfriend. and really, you adore that about him, too.

but, well. you’re rich also. and sometimes, you want to be the one to dote on your boyfriend.

you punch in the building code unnecessarily hard and stomp through the automatic doors before minghao can catch up with you. from behind, you can hear him laughing, and it makes you whirl back around to look at him, pouting extravagantly.

“i don’t see why that’s so funny. you promised, hao,” you whine, and minghao just laughs again.

that night had been just a normal date night, nothing more than the two of you dressing up to go to that one upscale chinese place that you both love. and so, it seemed like the best day to finally start paying for your dates—if it was any big occasion, minghao would’ve definitely protested against the idea, insistent that he wanted to treat you on such a special day.

and at the time, it seemed like it would work.

minghao had smiled at you, adjusting the pearls around your neck, and agreed.

you’d felt ridiculously satisfied, excited at the fact that finally, you’d have a chance to pay for your boyfriend. but oh, how wrong you were.

“i’m sorry, angel,” minghao says now, brushing a finger over your cheek fondly before pressing the ‘up’ button for the elevator. “it just so happened that i’d already paid for our meal before we’d even got there. i didn’t want to burst your bubble by telling you so, but i guess that made it even worse, hm?”

you whine again in frustration. “hao, that’s not even a thing! you can’t pay for a meal in advance!”

“i can when i know exactly what we’re going to order,” minghao grins.

“what?! i swear, that must go against restaurant etiquette! that's actually crazy behaviour. i can't believe you did that."

the elevator arrives then, and minghao gestures for you to get in first. you do, still arguing with him over restaurant rules and whatnot. even as you do so, supposedly very upset over his behaviour, you still hold onto his arm and lean against him to take off your heels, and then pass them over to him once they’re off your aching feet.

minghao smiles amusedly, terribly smitten. 

“—going to get you back for that stunt one day, xu minghao,” you say, stabbing an accusing finger into his shoulder. “gonna book out the entire restaurant. no, wait, the entire street! we’re going to venice one day, and i’m going to close down a whole road for us only. just you wait.”

the elevator doors open with a ding, and he trails behind as you continue talking, dreaming up big plans on how to treat your boyfriend sometime in the future.

it’s devastatingly endearing. he knows it was maybe a tiny, tiny bit mean to advance-pay the bill tonight, but in his defence, he does that most nights anyway. plus, he likes seeing how pouty you get over it, knowing you're not actually upset, but still insisting you are because you can pay for your own meals, without minghao's card, thank you very much.

and you very much can—he hasn’t run the numbers in a while, but he’s pretty sure you’re richer than him right now—but he likes paying for you. likes taking care of you like this.

he inputs the keycode to the apartment, chuckling as you continue to rant.

“okay, alright,” he finally concedes, opening the door and letting you enter first, taking off your wool coat for you and hanging it up by the door. “in which case, how about a compromise? i pay for our ordinary dates like these, and you can pay for special occasions.”

your eyes light up at his words. “wait, really?”

minghao laughs. “yes, really.” he puts your purse on the dresser by the door, your shoes in the shoe cupboard and then takes off his own. “except for valentine’s day, white day, our anniversary, and your birthday. i’ll be paying for those.”

“what?” you complain. “hao, you’re leaving me with nothing!”

“you can pay for my birthday.”

“come on, that’s a given. i would do that anyway.”

you’re giving him those big, sad eyes again, and minghao can’t help but smile even wider. lord, you’re just so pretty and you love him so much and he’s never been more grateful for that because he loves you so much too.

“well,” he says, pretending to think, “we don’t have an engagement or wedding anniversary yet. so if those things ever happen… then maybe…”

your eyes widen, little sparkles appearing in your irises even as your entire face softens, gentle and hopeful. “you’re… you want to marry me?”

minghao can’t take this anymore. he walks over, takes your face in his hands and kisses you, once. and then again, deeper, softer, for good measure. just to get his point across.

“of course,” he murmurs against your lips when he pulls away. “i love you.”

you lean in and peck him on the lips once more. “i love you too,” you say, and then pull away so he can see the mischievous glint in your eyes. “hey. if i propose to you, then i’ll definitely get to pay for every engagement anniversary we have, right?”

minghao laughs, pulling you back into his embrace. “sure, sweetheart. that’s only if you propose to me first, however.”

“are you trying to start a proposal race, minghao?”

“maybe. will you join in, y/n?”

you laugh, looping your arms behind his neck and bringing his face close to yours again. “oh, it’s on.”

fics tags: @jeonginssa @weird-bookworm @minhui896 @slytherinshua @haowrld @belladaises @moonlitskiiies @mirxzii @zozojella @kawennote09 @a-wandering-stay @abibliolife @wonranghaeee @icyminghao @sweet-like-caramel @your-yxnnie @odxrilove @kyeomyun @crackedpumpkin @kellesvt @eightlightstar @onlyyjeonghan @aaniag @starshuas @raevyng @isabellah29 @hrts4hanniehae @mcu-incorrect @dokyeomkyeom @suraandsugar @tulsa24 @melodicrabbit @dokyeomkyeom @hopeless-foolery

[bixbythemartian]

the problem with the bathroom wasn't so much that it was ugly, the thread was actually fairly positive and helpful at first, with people who at least didn't hate his design and were cheering him on, giving him advice (please note that SA does filter swearing if you don't have an account, so loving is fucking and poopoo is shit and drat is damn and so on)

Like, the bathroom isn't to my taste exactly, and the gravel surround for the tub always looked deeply uncomfortable to step on, and like a mold magnet, but the colors are fine enough in theory, and he was getting what seemed to be quality materials. it's distinctive and striking, it's a look, I never thought it was particularly ugly. I don't like that particular shade of red, but I know that's a matter of taste. I could do it in green and be happy with it, tbh.

the problem was that this guy was a DIY guy who made at least one REAL BIG OOPSIES and someone said:

I started writing up a big post but I don't think it will be constructive. Basically the jist is this: You've done a really bad thing and are making some choices that will have serious consequences. I suggest stopping here for a bit and thinking things over. Also ask lots of questions and listen to what alot of people are about to say here.

and he responded fairly poorly, a big old 'well the internet just likes to be mean' thing and insisted that things were fine, and that just because something 'wasn't up to code' doesn't mean it won't work, people let code violations slide all the time, it's not a big deal, blah blah blah.

he continued to be like 'oh I can deal with internet hate' while kind of poopooing the idea that he'd made that big of a whoopsie, and then everybody he called to get help for this was mysteriously not returning his calls (he had a big rant about how all contractors just took his money and made stuff he didn't want)

and it went on and on from there. at one point, being roasted for the design of the bathroom, he insisted it was to appeal to women, because women had an 'unfair' amount of influence over home buying, and brought out some really gross misogyny as more women chimed in to tell him he was incorrect

like the thread at SA could have been him responding 'aw, beans' and getting people in to help and then continue the DIY thread and it would have been fine, and wouldn't have been preserved in the comedy goldmine for posterity, almost nobody would remember it

but he kept throwing out shit like 'if you're not going to be CONSTRUCTIVE then don't criticize me!' because he wasn't acknowledging that people weren't being mean to be mean, that 'no, stop, wait, don't!' isn't criticism, it is an attempt to arrest your forward momentum on making a really bad mistake!

and he just kept doubling down, which is just bait for places like Something Awful.

that's more why the bathroom is notorious, although it's become 'look at this ugly bathroom', which really wasn't the original point (although that was part of the thread much later on down the road), it was more of a 'get a load of this guy' situation.

what is the child annihilating zipline

in 2010, a camp counselor goon logged on to the somethingawful forums asking for help with the zipline he build from scratch, and with no engineering knowledge, that didn’t seem to be working right. when he tested it with a sandbag, it continued to gather speed during the entirety of the 143 foot drop (19 degree slope) until it slammed into the wooden platform at the bottom at a speed of 65mph, presumably creating a child paste that would have to be scraped off to be sent home. there were pictures.

[bootycallin]

hi period sex w vi cuz im on my period and needy <3 cw: wlw men fuck off. obviously period sex. this is messy and nasty, don’t like it don’t read it. obv blood. vi lowkey has a blood kink. lotsa titty loving. u cry a little. lowkey projecting. not proofread.

vi knows exactly when your period happens. she just does.

when your legs start aching and you complain about your chest being sore when she tries to lay on it and you’re snappier and more emotional than usual, she knows. so, of course, she takes that as a chance to spoil you. buys you a bunch of chocolate and sweets and cups or entire body with her arms when you’re sleeping.

one little problem, though, are the cramps. she herself has never really experienced them. most the time she’s just achey and sensitive, but you? you’re constantly complaining of cramps, doubling over while standing, a hand on your lower belly. you often tried to tell her, it’s just fine. but she can’t handle it. what? she’s a good girlfriend, she can’t handle seeing her baby in pain!

oh, and most of all, vi’s a sexual creature. her libido’s not insane, but it’s pretty damn high. she could’ve sworn her sex drive lowered significantly the last time she broke up with someone, but then you came around and she’s in puberty all over again.

and she couldn’t care less if you’re bleeding. they say sex relieves cramps, right?

when she starts kissing you, all tongue and teeth and spit, she’s already wet. it’s been, what, three days without sex? she should be able to handle it, but ever since she started dating you, she’s a fucking machine (no pun intended). literally anywhere. bed, couch, bathroom, kitchen island, counter, balcony. any place around the house is game to her. she claims she’s just “appreciating her treasure”, which… is she not?

her hands are roaming, squeezing and squishing any bit of soft skin, fingertips pressing into your flesh, groaning into your mouth. she’s between your legs, her torso on the lower half of your own. her hand slips under your shirt, sneaky, big palm resting on your breast and squeezing the plump flesh. it pulls a moan from you, a whimpery noise. it was pleasure that slightly mixed with pain, breasts extra sensitive and swollen—hell, vi loves it.

“vi—“ your breath hitched, just briefly pulling away to catch your breath.

“sshh.” she shushes you. her tongue peeks out from her lips to lick the seam of your own, seeking entrance and muffling the moan you let out with her own lips. her fingers squeeze, squish, thumbs running over sensitive and pebbled nipples in a way that makes you pull away from her just to throw your head back and moan.

“baby.” vi practically growled—it’s like she’s a rabid animal or something. she tugs at your nipples, relishing in the way you whine and cry. your small hands grasp at her wrists, trying to slow her down.

“vi, wait…!” you cry out. it’s too much. she’s just barely started with you and you’re almost crying—she knew you got sensitive during this time, but she didn’t know it was so much. cute.

she did stop; with a considerable amount of effort, might you add. her fingers let go of your nipples just to push your shirt up, until your pretty tits showed to her. vi’s just obsessed with how they look, pretty puffy nipples perking, shape swollen due to hormones. not that your body’s any less perfect when you’re not on your period, but she can’t help appreciating when your body changes and you look just as fucking good.

vi pressed a quick, butterfly kiss to one of your tits, kissing the other one, then down your sternum. she kissed down your tummy, lower, until she was right above your pussy. she felt like a feral animal. she swore she could smell you. it’s like her entire brain chemistry just immediately changes when she’s next to your cunt, and she immediately can only think of pushing her tongue inside you.

“vi, wait,” you stop her just as her fingers hook under your loose shorts, under the band of your panties. “you know i’m—“

“i don’t fucking care, princess,” vi muttered, almost sounding dangerous, she pulled your shorts down, tugging your legs up to remove them and then putting your legs over her shoulders, face to face with your cunt. you’re wet, and you have to blame it on hormones, because there’s no way you can get this wet thinking of your girlfriend eating you out while you—

you can’t really complain because she was quickly pulling your panties to the side, pressing her tongue flat against your puffy, red folds with a downright pornographic moan.

your hand flew down to grab at her hair, tugging slightly. her sounds are nearly ferocious and she all but rips your panties off of your body. her tongue is quick, licking and lapping up blood and juices alike now without a pad covering it. it's nasty. messy and so fucking good.

"sh-shii— viii..." you drag her name out, a near sob ripping form your throat. she's not listening, drunk on how you taste. blood covers her lips, and she couldn’t give less of a fuck. she just laps it up like some sort of messier vampire, almost embarrassing enthusiasm. hungry, savoring the metallic taste that’s coyingly sweet to her, shoving her tongue into your slick home and holding your thighs open as they try to close around her on instinct.

shit, she’s not stopping anytime soon. not until you’re melting and all she can taste is you.

𝄃𝄃𝄂𝄂𝄀𝄁𝄃𝄂𝄂𝄃 © bootycallin on tumblr. do not copy, translate or cross post without permission. ᛝ

[arc-misadventures]

Demon Sisters

Ren: Dammit!

Jaune: That noble bastard whore!

Ren: He told us to clear up a small cult! Two, three people tops! I've lost count of how many people I've killed!

Jaune: At least fifty three in total!

Ren: You're keeping count?!

Jaune: Yes. Fifty four!

Ren: Why?!

Jaune: Cause I'm going to make that fat noble prick pay a gold coin for every cultist we've killed! And, if he refuses, it'll be one punch per dead cultist!

Ren: We split the punches fifty fifty?

Jaune: Hell yeah we will!

Ren: Awesome! Let's do this!

~~~

Ren: Haa haa haa... What... Haa... What's the count?

Jaune: One... Ohh boy... One hundred, and seventy two...

Ren: One hundred, and seventy two gold coins, or one hundred, and seventy two punches... I'm not sure which one I want more!

Jaune: A hundred, and seventy gold coins, two punches if he refuses. Or, two for the hell of it!

Ren: Hell yeah!

Jaune: But, money aside... The hell is with this cult...? When they came running at us most of them were unarmed, little knives at the best, then they grabbed whatever weapons they found along the way.

Ren: I know cultist tend to be... fanatical... But, when they came running at us, I didn't get that fanatical zeal when they were charging towards us. It was more frantic if anything.

Jaune: Their screams... They didn't sound crazy, but... they sounded scared.

Ren: Yeah... They weren't running towards us, more like they were running away from something, and we just happened to be in their way.

Jaune: Hmm... We haven't seen any of the upper echelon, much less the cult leader, just the peons...

Ren: Yeah... Something feels wrong... Very wrong.

Jaune: Agreed. Stay on your guard, we're walking in blind.

Ren: Always.

~~~

Ren: Okay, seems to be leading to end of the little cult hideoooooooooout...

Ren: Oh...

Ren: Hey, Jaune, I figured out what the cultists were running from!

Jaune: Let me guess: They preformed a ritual to summon a being of unimaginable power to obtain unimaginable power in turn. However, the being they summoned didn't give them squat, and instead killed them all, and is just standing there gloating over a pile of bloody corpses waiting for a tag of foolish heroes to come by, and fight them?

Ren: Yes. But, the being they summoned was a demon.

Jaune: Typical summoned creature during a cult ritual. Shame though, I was hoping for an eldritch monster personally, I'm tired of dealing with demons.

Ren: Yeah, but uhh... There's... There's two demons instead of one.

Jaune: Peachy.

Ren: But, uhhh...?

Jaune: What's uhhh?

Ren: Well...

Jaune: What's, 'Uhhh?'

Jaune: Oh... They're, 'Uhhh.'

Ren: Uhhh... Shit...

Jaune: That's one way to say it.

: Oh? What's this? Look sister! A group of adventures are here to kill us~!

: Adventurers? Maybe we'll be able to have some fun dealing with these two than those pathetic little cultist.

Jaune: Uhh... W-We're just here to deal with the cultists.

Ren: And, we're told they're just be two cultists not... What's the final count?

Jaune: Two hundred, and thirteen.

Ren: Two hundred and thirteen cultist, and two demons wasn't in out contract!

Jaune: And, we don't get hazard pay for this either!

Ren: Since when have we ever gotten hazard pay?

Jaune: Exactly! So, we're just going to go.

Ren: See you later!

: Uh uh uh!

Ren: They've blocked the exit...

Jaune: Cue the boss music...

: The cultists didn't sacrificed enough to myself, and my sister for us to remain in the material world for a few more hours. So while we're here we would like some... Entertainment~!

Jaune: Boss music intensifies...

Ren: Alright then! Bring it!

: Ahahah~! Sheath your weapons, we're not interested in any fight. Well, I can't speak for my sister, I'm more interested in something else~!

Ren: She's looking at you.

Jaune: I can tell, Ren.

: Tell me, Sir Knight, what is your name?

Jaune: My name is Jaune Arc! Paladin of the order of the Summer Maiden!

: A paladin?!

: Of the Summer Maiden~?

Jaune: Now, I've told you my name, what are yours?

: Oh how rude of me, my name is Bleiss, Demon of the Ashen Snow. And this is my sister...

: My name is, Weiss, Demon of the Frozen Snow!

Bleiss: And, I think dear sister, we have found our... Entertainment~!

Weiss: Indeed we did sister~!

Jaune: ...

Ren: ...

Jaune: They're talking about...

Ren: They're talking about you, yes.

Jaune: Alright...

Ren: Okay, ladies! I'm going to leave, I'll leave my friend here with you. Try not to break them, Jaune.

Jaune: Should you be saying that to them about me?

Ren: Jaune, what happened to that, Greater Demon we met?

Jaune: She gave me her card?

Ren: She went away with a lim… She gave you her card?!

Jaune: Yeah, it's a summing card incase I want to...

Ren: Smash?

Jaune: Yeah...

Ren: ...

Ren: Okay, I'm going, I’ll see you later at the bar after I beat up that noble.

Jaune: Okay, see you later, Ren!

Jaune: Okay so... How do you want to do this ladies~?

Weiss: Hold on, you slept with a greater demon?

Bleiss: And she gave you a 'booty call card~?'

Jaune: Uhh... yeah...

Bleiss: Oh my, that's certainly an achievement~!

Weiss: Tell us, what was this greater demons name~?

Jaune: W-Willow the Greater Demon of the Ember Snow.

Bleiss: W-Willow the Greater Demon...?

Weiss: Of the Ember Snow...?

Jaune: Uhh... Yeah, that's the one.

Bleiss: That's our mom...

Jaune: She's you're what...?

Weiss: You fuck our mom...

Jaune: I did what?!

Bleiss: And, you got her card...?

Jaune: Seriously, Willow is your mother?

WB: ...

WB: DIBS!!!

Jaune: Whoa hey?!