#oh you can’t because you’re not Brienne of Tarth | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

a-libra-writes · 3 years ago

Text

GoT Imagines - When You're Engaged to Someone Else

Woooo this is a doozy and I'm including new characters, mostly book ones! because i both love my followers and have lost my marbles.

In this preference, you'll be pining with: Ned Stark, Robb Stark, Sansa Stark, Jon Snow, Benjen Stark, Jory Cassel, Mance Rayder, Eddison Tollett, Pre-Reek!Theon, Yara Greyjoy, Victarion Greyjoy, Daenerys Targaryen, Jorah Mormont, Missandei, Grey Worm, Tywin Lannister, Tyrion Lannister, Jaime Lannister, Cersei Lannister, Sandor Clegane, Bronn, Jaquen H’Ghar, Petyr Baelish, Robert Baratheon, Stannis Baratheon, Davos Seaworth, Margaery Tyrell, Brynden Tully, Edmure Tully, Brienne of Tarth, Ramsay Bolton, Roose Bolton, Oberyn Martell, Doran Martell, Arianne Martell, Tyene Sand

Ned Stark

He’s already an expert in suffering in silence, so this should be no different. Although he’s very surprised at the sudden arrangement, and while he isn’t a man to throw his rank around… He wonders if he can’t convince your family to reconsider. If it’s simply impossible, Ned would resign himself to having to stop the relationship. He’s too honorable to ever consider an affair and he’s not a man to start a duel or cause trouble, especially since it would negatively affect your reputation. The heavy combination of missing you, pining after you all over again and feeling like he didn’t do enough is hard. Some days he entertains the idea of still having a friendship, but it doesn’t seem like a good idea. He doesn’t trust himself.

Robb Stark

The young wolf tries to accept it, even if his feelings become more and more angry each day. Robb never threw his name around, but… he was going to be Lord Stark. Wasn't that good enough for your family? For you? He tries to be the bigger man, but if you're miserable with your spouse and they don't treat you well, he can't keep his temper in check. Expect him to have a sudden outburst at a feast and cause a scene. The only thinking keeping him from an outright duel are his parents and his worry about your reputation. But if he was pushed to it….

Sansa Stark

She should've known this would happen. It's the fate of all ladies, yet there's a bitterness that tugs at her when she hears the news. Sansa tries to bury her feelings around others, but she's never done that with you. She expresses her disappointment and sorrow, and swears she'll help if your spouse turns out to be awful. She doesn't want them to be, but she doesn't want you beginning to prefer their company, either. She wonders if her affection for you would wane if she just pined from afar and tried to keep her feelings to herself.

Jon Snow

Ah yes, once again his bastardry is hitting him straight in the gut. Jon knew it was going to happen eventually, he already felt like the relationship was on a timer, and now it’s finally ended. He’s convinced there’s no getting out of it, because even if you did - you’d never be able to be with him in the open. It makes Jon glad he’s going to the Wall; hopefully the distance and cold will dull his feelings. In spite of that, sometimes he’ll tell Sam about you, and he speaks so mournfully it makes Sam think that distance hasn’t done all that much to help Jon’s pining.

Benjen Stark

He should be the bigger person and accept that this is for the best. He’s sworn to the Wall, and you two shouldn’t have been sneaking around. He should be relieved neither of you were caught. None of these thoughts are comforting. Ben tries to cope by making not-so-joking jokes about you running off to the Wall too, or perhaps he should take Yoren’s job and find his way to your court once in a blue moon. Then there’s no joking, and it’s just bitterness. He removes himself from your life after that, not wanting to hurt you with his own negative thoughts. He’d rather you keep the happy memories.

Jory Cassel

He accepts it, not that it brings him any pleasure. Jory's always been proud of his service to the Starks, but he's long understood that his landed seat is not a valuable one. Whenever he married, if he did, it wouldn't be someone as lovely as you. The announcement still hits him in the gut and he dejectedly tries to break it off (though it's easier on him if you do it). If he was in charge of guarding you, he'd switch shifts immediately and begin avoiding you, thinking it'll make things easier.

Eddison Tollett

This relationship already seemed too good to be true, so it’s abrupt end is not surprising. He’s sworn to the Wall and you both were sneaking around to begin with, so this should have been expected, but… it just makes him feel even more tired and dumb. Sam and Jon notice how little he sleeps and that he’s begun to skip meals, and he doesn’t have to explain why. They can do the math. Edd at least doesn’t try to bury any sad feelings or memories. It’s too exhausting to actively try, and it’s something to keep him company while he works. Maybe the feelings will fade… eventually.

Mance Rayder

It's one more reason for him to leave the "South" and go past the Wall. He knew a proper relationship with you wasn't possible because of his vows, but watching you go through this sham of an arranged marriage is just depressing. He'll comfort you best he can until he has to go back to the Wall, though he won't make promises he can't keep. Having to separate from you weighs heavy on him for a long time, and is one of many reasons he abandons the Watch.

Theon Greyjoy

What the hell is this? Hearing the news ruins his whole day, worse if he wasn’t able to hear it directly from you. He’s the heir to the Iron Islands, and his interest in you was clear as day! No, he hadn’t proposed yet… but he was getting to it! Now some mainlander beat him to it? Theon is absolutely seething. He’d prefer to duel your spouse to teach them a lesson in front of everyone, but he’s open to more boring methods like reasoning with your family. If he wasn’t able to change the engagement, he’d be bitter, and more than willing to carry on an affair behind your spouse’s back. He ought to just go the Ironborn route and kidnap you for himself.

Asha (Yara) Greyjoy

When you give her the news and you’re clearly distraught about it, Yara considers carrying you off to her ship right there. If you’re non-Ironborn, you’ll be her saltwife -- and if you’re Ironborn, she wants to have a discussion with whoever the hell planned this when everyone KNOWS you belong with her. You hadn’t expected this possessive behavior, but now you know Yara’s willing to fight for you as soon as someone takes you. No surprise, she’s more than willing to sneak around with you behind your husband’s back - maybe she can goad him into a duel. That would certainly solve a problem, wouldn’t it?

Victarion Greyjoy

He doesn’t understand at first. Victarion had made it clear that you were his, hadn’t everyone known that? No, he never made any sort of formal marriage, but not because he didn’t care. He felt like there was no need, hadn’t everyone known? If your family and spouse are Ironborn, he’ll immediately sail to their keep and raise all seven hells, and marry you right there in front of them. If you were sent away to the green lands, it would take the combined power of Balon, Yara and Aeron to keep him from sailing off immediately and just kidnapping you - preferably after killing your spouse. Victarion is pissed. Someone is going to pay for this.

Daenerys Targaryen

She’s just as mad at you as she is with whoever arranged this ridiculous match. Daenerys doesn’t often entertain arrogant thoughts, but… How could anyone think to match you with someone else, knowing your relationship with her? She feels she ought to be offended, though Daenerys knows this is hard on you as well, and you didn’t ask for it. She’ll think of some clever way to get you out of the arrangement, no way is this person getting away from stealing from her. And yes, that might as well be what it is! While she’s working out what to do, if she so much as hears murmurs of the possibility of your spouse hurting you… all bets are off. She’s taking you back with her, alliance be damned.

Jorah Mormont

The announcement of your engagement is a punch to his gut and a shock to his system. Jorah knew he wasn’t the best husband material, but he was planning to ask for your hand himself - then this happened. What’s worse, he knows as far as practical marriage goes, he has little to offer. He goes into a bit of a panic as he tries to think of what to do. There’s sensible choices, like trying to talk to your family with you. Then there’s not so sensible ones… Maybe running off, maybe just continuing the relationship behind your new spouse’s back, maybe dueling them… While Jorah is in emotional turmoil, he’d do anything for you. Even if you wanted to break off the relationship… or had a plan for him to follow. He’s nothing if not hopelessly devoted.

Missandei

… Oh. Maybe she shouldn’t have expected you to stick around for so long. As close as she is to Daenerys, she really has no fancy titles or things to offer. She understood why your family chose the match, it was a good one, politically speaking… but that does little to soothe her. Quite the opposite, a strong, desolate feeling overcomes her, one she hasn’t felt in a long time. She isn’t sure what to do, if it’s her place to stop the process. Perhaps if you asked her, she could try to make plans. Daenerys would help as well, considering how fond she is of you two, and how much she despises women being forced into arrangements.

Grey Worm

The sudden news takes him off guard, and sends him into a bit of an existential crisis. He was starting to see himself as a person, with his own name and a path he chose to follow… then this arrangement happens, and he’s forced to face what the rest of the world sees him as. It’s not that Grey Worm has a sense of ownership over you, but for once he was allowing himself all these happy feelings and memories with you, and now it’s gone. Of course he wants you back, but he feels paralyzed. What if he makes it worse? Does this have to happen? He starts to become even more withdrawn and distant, worrying Missandei until she decides to help. Grey Worm finally returns to his old self when he has you in his arms again.

Tywin Lannister

His steady composure is hit with such a rage at the news, the servant delivering it goes into a panic. His interest in you was obvious, so anyone doing this was trying to spite him. He doesn’t take the insult well. Perhaps before you’re even able to tell him the news yourself, threats will be delivered to both the spouse’s family and your own - Tywin is especially furious towards them, and won’t forget this - and incidents will be arranged. He refuses to be a man who pines after someone or covets another one’s wife, nor will he allow some lesser lord to take what he perceives as ‘his’.

Tyrion Lannister

The angst hits him like a ton of bricks, and it’s even worse if this came out of left field. It hurts less if he hears it from you, but only just. He should have known your family wouldn’t have accept any proposal he made - and gods know he was ready to do it - it’s just one more log to fuel his self-loathing and bitterness toward this world. But if you knock some sense into him, he’ll snap out of that spiral and begin to plan with you. There’s plenty of choices before the two of you - scandal? Running off? - but rest assured, Tyrion is going to investigate the hell out of this person. He’d never forgive himself if you got stuck with a brute.

Jaime Lannister

The fact he knew this was inevitable doesn't help Jaime's irritation. He can't believe your family arranged for that person to marry you. Seriously? You'd better keep Jaime at a distance from your spouse, because he can't help himself from making snide remarks and sarcastic comments. If he riles up the guy into a duel, all the better. He'll do all sorts of reckless things to begin with, and it's only worse when he's upset. He's also very willing to have an affair behind your spouse's back - you were with him first. You’ll probably have to scold Jaime about you two almost getting caught, but he’s above reproach. His stubbornness and jealousy gets worse the closer you two are.

Cersei Lannister

She’s absolutely infuriated with your family. You were her handmaiden, someone whose been with her for years - and they have the nerve to go behind her back like this?! It smells like a scheme of Tyrion’s, or perhaps Varys, but she’ll deal with them in time. For now, she’ll work out what to do about your spouse. She’ll try to keep you around as much as possible, and her possessiveness comes out in full. You can’t possibly be interested in such a worthless man.

Sandor Clegane

When you tell Sandor, he’s quiet for a discerningly long time before the anger and arguments come out. And then the quiet bitterness. The thing is, he knew this was coming for a while. He knew your time together was limited, he shouldn’t have things like hopes and happiness because it’ll just get taken away. And it is. Even if you explain you’ll try to break off the arrangement, that there’s still a way to get out, he has trouble believing it. He’s seen enough ladies get chained to useless fucking lords, he’d rather not see it happen to someone he cares about, thanks. Sandor will push you away as much as he can, but you could still attempt to convince him to have an affair… or perhaps leave King’s Landing entirely.

Ser Bronn of the Blackwater

He’s only mildly annoyed at the inconvenience. It’ll be a lot harder for you both to sneak around now, and forget about it if you’re having to move somewhere far away. Guess that’s the end of that ‘relationship’ - he should’ve expected it. Bronn is way more willing to stay close if you remain in King’s Landing, and he expects you both to keep fooling around. Now, if he’s actually started to develop feelings about you… he’ll start to act differently. You don’t actually like your spouse, do you? Wasn’t that just some arranged bullshit? He’ll throw smirks and subtle insults your spouse’s way, as if trying to goad them into a fight. More then once you two will almost get caught because he decides waltzing up to your window is totally acceptable, or trying to have a quickie in the middle of the day. A surprisingly jealous side will come out and he’s in total denial about any feelings he might have.

Jacquen H’ghar

This isn’t alarming to Jacquen at first. He knew he could never have such a union with you, and since this Westerosi society is so insistent on marriage, it would happen eventually. Still, your pain hurts him as well. Jacquen would have a variety of plans … anywhere from easily disguising as a guard or servant so he’s always beside you, or perhaps whisking you away somewhere. This isn’t the end of your relationship for him - it’s just a challenge to overcome. He assumes you won’t send him away or break it off.

Petyr Baelish

You being someone else’s wife makes no difference to Petyr, though he’s surprised in himself. Usually he stays out of such affairs, it only causes trouble… But he’s been intrigued by you, and quite frankly, he’s offended that this Lord Whoever from Wherever didn’t take his interest into account. No matter. Petyr has plenty of plans to deal with this pest, though he’s annoyed at his own jealousy whenever he sees you together with your spouse, even if you’re miserable. While he doesn’t want you unhappy, it certainly makes starting an affair and/or disposing of your spouse much easier.

Robert Baratheon

He’s furious and everyone is going to know about it. Robert will complain endlessly to Ned and Lord Arryn about how he found you first, how that useless shit of a husband won’t know what to do with you. Since he does little to hide his disgust, rumors will spread all over court. Hell, he’ll probably say even stupider things when he’s drunk, or he’ll do something stupider, like actually try to aggravate the guy into a fight or a duel. If you’re actually able to get him under control, he has no qualms about having an affair with you… but he may not be subtle about it. So that’s another thing to keep in mind.

Stannis Baratheon

It’s depressingly impressive how willing Stannis is to bury and deny his feelings once he hears you’re promised to someone else. He’ll try to extinguish all the happiness he had with you, bottle up all the memories and feelings that went along with it. This will be fine. He’ll be fine. This iron resolve is easy to maintain if Stannis rarely sees you. If you both are forced to interact even semi-often, it chips away at him, and he can’t help himself from making biting remarks about your spouse when you both visit. He hates feeling this way, he’s never felt it before, and he carries a deep grudge against your spouse and family for making it happen. It’s easier if you write to him, but then Stannis starts keeping those letters and punishing himself by reading them over and over. Eventually he stops entirely, deeming it inappropriate, even if that feels like cutting off one of his limbs.

Davos Seaworth

The old knight is understandably saddened by news of your betrothal and marriage, but it makes sense. Politics-wise, Davos believes he isn’t much of a prize, even when he’s risen to Lord. He should’ve expected this would happen. He’d wish you genuine happiness… But if you were miserable, Davos would feel awful and powerless. If you truly wanted to continue the relationship behind your spouse’s back, his biggest worry would be the secret getting out and your reputation being ruined. He wouldn’t be able to resist forever, but he’d still try to talk you out of it and try to convince you to forget about him.

Margaery Tyrell

She seeks you out the moment she finds out - and that was quickly, because she often keeps tabs on you. Her grandmother warned her about getting so close to her favorite, but it still comes as a terrible shock. Margaery holds you close and promises she’ll make it better, somehow. Maybe she and her grandmother can reason with her family, perhaps you can marry into the Tyrell family, so you both can be together. She’ll fix it, she swears. The thought of someone else being with you is terrible enough, she’ll be even more worried if the person is abusive. Margaery won’t stand for it, and might take a few rare risks for your sake.

Brynden Tully

This stirs up a lot of complicated feelings in the old knight. He knew his relationship with you wouldn’t last forever, that you’d have to marry eventually, and he never wanted to marry…. But he feels like this is his fault, especially if you’re miserable. He could’ve prevented this. Brynden knows he ought to break off the relationship, and he won’t blame you if you do… but he’ll also consider the idea of continuing the relationship. And if you have to go somewhere far away, he’ll still appreciate you sending letters and having a correspondence. The relationship may not be the same long-distance, but he cares a lot about you, and it hurts having you cut from his life.

Edmure Tully

Woe and misery. How much wine is in Riverrun’s stores? He may end up drinking a dent in it by the time the month is out. He almost didn’t believe the news until he heard it from several people, or just you directly. How could this happen? Wasn’t he courting you properly, taking all the steps just the right way? Wasn’t his interest obvious to anyone with eyes? Edmure approaches your family with a bit of a hot head, almost demanding an answer for why they chose whoever over … whoever your spouse is. Edmure doesn’t even care who it is, he hates their guts immediately. More likely than not, he’ll do something foolish, like start a duel. If all else fails, he’ll make sad eyes at you at all the feasts and galas and go into a bit of a depression.

Brienne of Tarth

Brienne is immediately distraught, but also believes she deserves it somehow. This happy relationship just had to come to an end, didn’t it? Well, you two had to be discreet about it to begin with, which didn’t please her … but this alternative feels worse. Brienne switches between trying to stay frosty to make it easier for you two to part, and being unable to hold back her affection and sadness. The best solution she can think of is to stay as your sworn sword, independent of your new husband’s house guards. And gods know, she will come at him with a vengeance if he even dares upset you or lay an unwanted hand on you. That means the relationship could continue, but she dislikes the secrecy even more when you’re married. While she doesn’t like the idea of running away from problems, maybe in certain circumstances, she’d be open to the idea…

Ramsay Bolton

Ramsay is irate, to say the least. Even if you don’t actually know him, you’ve just caught his eye, he’ll become possessive. If you both were romantic before the engagement news, his anger and possessiveness would be even more dangerous. Woe to your spouse if he lives close to the Dreadfort - leave it to Ramsay to think up some “accident” for them to be involved in. And if he finds out they’re involved in some sort of treason or crime, that’s all the better, no matter how flimsy the “crime” is. If he’s feeling especially reckless, he’ll just arrange their murder and take you back right away. Ramsay is a terrible loser, doubly so if it involves one of the few things he actually cares about.

Roose Bolton

On the outside he doesn’t react to the news beyond a silent glare. On the inside, Roose is furious. He had plans for you, plans that may have taken quite a while to get to this point, and now it’s been ruined by someone whose actively working against him… or too stupid to realize what a massive mistake they just made. Roose thinks up various ways to circumvent this and have you to himself. In the meantime, he’ll gladly continue an affair behind your spouse’s back, but that won’t necessarily save them from death. You’ll notice him become increasingly possessive and jealous, even if you have zero interest in your spouse, and you can sense he’ll be holding a deep grudge against whoever arranged this in the first place.

Oberyn Martell

As soon as he hears about the news, Doran has to talk him down from dueling the man…Half his daughters support it, the other half suggest something more subtle. Overyn feels insulted, for one - your affection for each other was obvious, yet your family still made this arrangement. And if he doesn’t get his duel, he will spread all sorts of unsavory, salacious rumors about your spouse, in hopes of creating a scandal that makes your family break the union. Or better, lead to the man dueling Oberyn directly! Oberyn doesn’t even consider continuing your relationship with him an “affair”. You both were together first, and a farce of a marriage you didn’t agree to won’t change that. You just have to make sure he can be discreet.

Doran Martell

While the news of your engagement is depressing, it isn't surprising. He's quite aware of the politics of Westeros, even if his own family doesn't believe it, and he had wind of this engagement. He just thought he could stop it in time. He hides his disappointment, but his family can tell he's withdrawing. Oberyn argues with his brother to go get you and fight, but Doran is a man of silent plans. He'll still love to correspond with you, and you can tell by his letters that he seems hopeful. Maybe he's thought of a way to break it off …

Arianne Martell

Well, isn’t this irksome? Arianne loved having you in her palace and keeping you all to herself, but then this foolish arranged marriage happened… She doesn’t hide her disdain, and she’s annoyed at herself for not doing more to stop it. The princess will spend no small amount of time being angry at the unfairness of it. Once she’s calmed, she doesn’t see why you both can’t continue the relationship behind closed doors. You’re both used to sneaking around, anyway. And Arianne can’t resist ferreting around for some salacious rumors about your spouse… Wouldn’t it be a shame if she found out something that led you to your family cutting the betrothal off?

Tyene Sand

She’s beyond annoyed at this outcome. You were her favorite, in more ways than one, and while she didn’t delude herself into thinking you’d be together forever… well, couldn’t you both have spent your days in court in service to the Martells, or perhaps left forever on a boat to Essos? Why did this have to happen so soon? She’s despondent, much as she tries to hide it, even with her sisters trying to comfort her. She begins to think of plans, just little things … a rumor here, a scheme there. She’ll feel much better if you remain in the Sunspear court, so she can stay close and your relationship can continue.

#got x reader #game of thrones x reader #got imagines #got imagine #game of thrones imagine #got preferences #game of thrones preferences #& yes that is 35 characters & yes I CANNOT TAG THEM ALL bc tumbles wont let me #*screeches*

590 notes · View notes

janiedean · 3 years ago

Note

... please, please, PLEASE write some crack with AA!Davos. And Melisandre losing her entire mind over it ofc.

hello anon this is late and I'm in my inbox trying to catch up with prompts and you're getting something idek what but I gave it my all

"No," Melisandre says.

"For the first time in my life," Davos cautiously replies in the silence that has filled the room, "I would be uttermost fucking glad to agree with you."

"I don't think," Jon Snow says very, very slowly, eyes staring at the sword in Davos's hands - seven hells he never even liked using swords for that matter -, "that it's something either you or she can deny." He sounds relieved, for that matter.

"Beg your pardon, your Grace," Davos goes on, wishing he could drop the damned thing and just run and instead there's the entire Great Hall in Winterfell staring at him in various arrays of bewilderment, shock and in two specific cases relief, and one of them being his King - not Jon Snow, King in the North, but Stannis Baratheon - isn't helping any, "that's - you are the one who came back to life. Literally."

"He's certainly not the only one who has, lately," Jaime Lannister mutters from somewhere in the crowd and oh, right, they told them about Catelyn Stark having... come back to life in the Riverlands when he and Brienne of Tarth brought Sansa Stark here and a Valean army along with her good thing because they were about to lose the damned battle when they did, but then the lady obviously throws her elbow in his hip and he shuts up.

"That still - it makes no sense! How is that - I can't be, all right?"

"You did say," Stannis clears his throat, very slowly, oh please no not him, "that when you woke up on that piece of rock after Blackwater you were surrounded by smoke and you were covered in salty water and you were sure you were dead, and that was just - after your sons died in that battle, wasn't it?"

Oh, Seven bloody fucking Hells -

"That doesn't mean I died for real!"

"Well," Jon Snow's friend, fuck, what did he say his name was when he showed up here from Oldtown a few days ago - Samwell Tarly, right, "prophecies... are never exactly straight, my lord. Also, that sword is quite literally glowing. For real."

Why, Davos thinks, why did I ever hold that fucking Valyrian steel sword of Tarly's that he said he stole from his father, why would I do it, I should have kept my bloody hands to myself now -

"This is impossible," Melisandre says again, staring at Davos, then the sword, then Stannis, then Jon Snow, then at Davos all over again, "this is impossible! The Lord of Light never said it was you."

"Well, I doubt he ever said it was me either at this point," Stannis mutters still sounding relieved of it.

"I would like, again, for once, to agree with this red witch, there is no bloody way it's me, I can't - please, didn't Rhaegar Targaryen start an entire war because this supposed prince that was promised or whatever the fuck had to be his son or his relative? Sure as hell I'm not related to a bloody Targaryen now. Sorry but this is insane. King Stannis here is more related to one than I am. He," he motions towards Jon Snow, "is definitely more related to one than I am, and I doubt Lord Reed was lying when he shared that piece of information with us."

"I would not," said Lord Reed protests.

"Well, exactly," Davos goes on, "and - and the lady Brienne here is more related to one than I am if what history my princess used to talk about is true, there is no way -"

"Wouldn't be so sure," wait, was that fucking Sandor Clegane who has come from the Vale with both Lannister, Sansa Stark and Brienne of Tarth, what has he to share now -

"How exactly," Davos groans.

Clegane shrugs. "You're from Flea Bottom."

"Yes, exactly my point -"

"Targaryens were kings until the rebellion," he points out. "Who says that some of them didn't fuck around with the commoners at some point? Doubtful that anyone would go and claim that some king planted a bastard on them, but you can't know."

"You - you can't be saying that some great-grandfather of mine was a Targaryen bastard," Davos tries to protest.

"I'm saying you can't know he wasn't," Clegane shrugs, sounding entirely too gleeful about it. Why. Why would he be. He has no stakes in this. What the -

"This is not happening," he says, at the same time as Melisandre saying the exact same thing.

No one proffers a word for a moment.

Then Stannis clears his throat. "You know," he says, "I would be seriously considering that it's true just because it not being true is the one thing you two ever agreed on since you met. Maybe it's a sign."

Why is he smiling slightly? All right, he does, mostly to Davos only, as far as he's known, and he just wishes it wasn't a point that made sense, but -

Fuck.

If that sword wasn't feeling warm in his hand when everyone else said that it felt burning to them to the point they couldn't touch it he'd just, throw it on the ground and leave, except he can't, and -

He sighs.

"If," he says, "if this has a chance in the Seven Hells of being true, does that mean I have to do what exactly?"

"End the Long Night," Melisandre says, sounding absolutely not happy about it.

"Yes, a bit more detail maybe? That doesn't mean anything!"

"Save the world from the darkness," she goes on, gloomily.

"That still doesn't tell me how!"

"Well, the Lord of Light never was - He never specified the details, if you're it then you should know yourself," she mutters, and -

Davos is just done, all right?

"That's just - I didn't even know I - you know what, I'll just give Lord Tarly here back the sword -"

"My lord," Tarly says taking a step back, "please do keep it, it's not like I'm ever going to use it properly myself. All yours!"

"All - it's Valyrian steel!"

"And it definitely chose you to wield it, so. Really. You can absolutely keep it, my lord. No offense, my lord."

"Maybe," Jon Snow says, "we should leave Lord Davos to think about this instead of nagging him."

Davos is suddenly very thankful for the lad's existence and for the fact that the moment he speaks everyone immediately rushes out of the room.

Everyone except Stannis - Melisandre stalks out repeating that there is no way, and she'll pray some more, and so on, but at this point he's barely hearing her.

Davos lets out a breath the moment everyone else has left. "There is," he says, "no way this is me."

"Davos," Stannis replies, staring straight at him, "let me just say it once."

"... What?"

"That I never wanted to be that and I never thought it could be me, and knowing it's not me is relieving, but - but I couldn't have imagined anyone more suited than you."

"Your Grace, I'm -"

"Maybe," he smiles a tiny bit wider, "I didn't have it wrong when I thought making new lords was a good idea."

"I -"

"Davos, honestly, to everyone at Storm's End... you could have been that. Maybe it was just destiny that it would have to be you."

"And I have no idea of how I would be supposed to do it," Davos sighs, relenting, letting the sword's tip fall on the ground. He has a feeling he cannot exactly... say no now. Not when he's being stared at like... like he was stared at the day he showed up at Storm's End with a ship full of onions and salted fish.

"Why, do you think she told me how I was supposed to do it?"

"... I imagine she didn't."

"Absolutely not. And not like I... believe that this Lord of Light exists, but if whatever is out there chose you then I still don't think it was wrong."

"Now His Grace is flattering me."

"I don't really think I am," he replies, and Davos can't help smiling back even if he doesn't feel like there is anything to be happy about.

Well.

He supposes he'll find out how in the Seven Hells he's going to stop the Long Night when it's time to. For now he lets himself smile back and when Stannis's hand cautiously grasps his elbow he feels warm for it, and -

It could be worse, he thinks.

Much worse.

But he still thinks this entire matter makes no bloody sense at all.

#davos seaworth #stannis baratheon #stavos #i guess #my fic #sorry anon this is very late #I'M TRYING TO CATCH UP WITH PROMPT #*S #I'LL MANAGE AT SOME POINT #WELL #have azor ahai davos i hope it's somewhat funny bc idk anymore

37 notes · View notes

everydayescapeartist · 3 years ago

Text

JB Fic Exchange Recs - AU Oneshots

Well, I’ve gotten through about half of the @jaime-brienne-fic-exchange fics at this point, which is both not nearly enough for my liking and also pretty impressive for me, lol. I wanted to get some recs out ahead of the reveal because the wealth of talent in this fandom should be celebrated and shouted from every rooftop...and here we are down to the wire. Haha! Obviously, there are SO many more awesome fics available, so take this as just a lovely sampling. Thank you dear authors for sharing your talents with us all!

Bug Juice: Jaime and Brienne's Summer at Camp - THIS IS MY GIFT FIC! READ IT NOW! Okay, even if this wasn't my gift fic, I would absolutely love this fun romp of a fic. My prompt was basically summer camp with JB flair and my author took that to such a level of creativity and snark, it was just beyond perfect! This one is in Myrcella's POV...I didn't even know I needed this, but I really did! She's watching the season finale of a reality tv show that's set at summer camp. Everyone is riveted by Jaime and Brienne's will-they-won't-they, enemies-to-lovers subplot, Myrcella included, even though she does have a bit of insider knowledge naturally. I love the way this is written like reality show segments, with Myrcella's brilliant reactions/commentary/texting of her uncle from her couch. There are commercial breaks that will crack you up. A very serious discussion about Capture the Flag is had. The GoT show digs are fantastic. Really, this is the fic you need to read if you like smiling for long periods of time and laughing potentially so hard you spew your drink. Oh, and also if you enjoy a good ole reality show HEA. Excerpt 1: “When Daenerys took over as Camp Director mid-session, I was worried,” Jaime says to the camera, running his good hand through his hair. “I have a complicated history with her father and she doesn’t trust me. The young Starks don’t exactly either, but Brienne has fought for me. She insisted that I am good at my job—good with the kids. She said that I am a good man.” Jaime’s eye twitches just a touch as he stares straight ahead, his face otherwise a mask of calculated neutrality. Myrcella picks up her phone, about to text her uncle to make fun of how sappy he is when the scene switches to Brienne. Excerpt 2: Brienne takes a long sip, eyeing Jaime skeptically over the rim as she lowers her cup. OMG, when are they going to make out? Just kiss him! Ugh, they better kiss or I’m going to lose my damned mind. “You keep it warm enough in here,” he complains with a sigh, brushing past Brienne, who slowly sets her cup down and turns to him. She wipes her wide palms on her shorts and watches his back as he struggles to shed his hooded sweatshirt. Excerpt 3:

“Nooooo!” Myrcella screams and falls off the couch. She lands on the ground with a thud. She scrambles to untangle herself from her blanket and clamour back up onto the couch to grab her phone. She sends Jaime a shouty text.

Score - Jaime, Brienne, and bar trivia! Also, face-sitting goodness...what's not to love?!

Excerpt: “And because I was right and you were wrong, I demand you two go on a date.”

“Excuse me,” Brienne squeaked. Was Tyrion trying to humiliate her? How could he suggest something so absurd without a cruel intention?

To Jaime’s credit, he had the decency to look mildly embarrassed. He even blushed. “Stop it, Tyrion,” he said, annoyed.

“I’m serious,” his brother replied. “You two have been flirting all night. Do something about it or this trivia arrangement will not work out in the long run.” Privilege - Jaime coming up with ridiculous lawsuits so he can keep spending time with his lawyer, Brienne (and a couple not-so-ridiculous ones too). This one is hilarious and clever and also very sweet. Do yourself a favor and read it!

Excerpt: “Jaime. At this point, I have known you for eighteen months—”

As their drinks appeared, he tapped his mochaccino against her tea. “Cheers!”

“—we have never not been in court! Seven Hells, Jaime, last month you had me sue Stoneheart Press because you didn’t like the representation of Goldenhand the Just in their line of historical fiction novels.”

He took a sip of his coffee. Anyone else would look ridiculous drinking what was essentially a dessert in a three-piece suit. But not Jaime. Jaime just…looked good. “And you won all those cases, Tarth. You’re good. Occasionally graceless while dealing with opposing counsel, but good all the same.

I hope our paths will croissant again - the way to my heart is baked goods...no, really, my hubby's a good and generous baker. So, any story where Jaime has baking skills is going to appeal to me. That said, this one is sweet and funny and has some pining and dare I say it was delicious? Go enjoy it!

Excerpt 1: “She didn’t hire me,” Jaime says. “She’s holding me hostage, actually.”

She stares at him for a moment, and then realizes he’s joking, and he laughs uproariously at the look on her face.

“I’m good at my job. Why’d she hire you? ”

Excerpt 2:

When Jaime comes back to work, he teases her again, though lightly, and she assures herself that whatever she felt in his apartment that evening is something that he can’t possibly reciprocate and nothing is ever going to come of it, so they can just be coworkers and it will be fine. She scrubs the kitchen countertop very aggressively when he comes to help her with a batch of coconut cake and hopes he doesn’t see her blushing. Thankfully, he then spills coconut flakes all over the kitchen floor and she has to get the broom and by the time she comes back her heartbeat has slowed down properly. She tells herself she’s being very, very stupid. The stupidest, really. Absolutely top tier stupidity.

On Paper - Addam is wingman extraordinaire, guiding is best friend through some unintentional sandwich wrapper flirting.

Excerpt:

He knew better than to bring a date to Tarth’s. It was a surefire way to ruin a good thing in case of nasty break up.

Bringing his best friend along should have been safer. Less risky.

It would have been if his best friend wasn’t Jaime Lannister, that’s for damn sure.

Meet Me Cute - J & B are bodyguards to Sansa and Margaery and are forced to be around each other following their charges’ meet cute and all that follows. This is told through multiple POVs and is so fun!

Excerpt:

“Margaery, can you tell Jaime to stop using ‘our’ when referring to me,” Brienne replied, opting not to engage with him directly.

Margaery sighed and turned towards her girlfriend’s bodyguard. “Jaime… why does Brienne hate your guts?”

“Not what I said.”

Jaime shrugged, “Don’t know.”

“Don’t know?” Brienne exclaimed, snapping her head up to glare at him. “You don’t know?”

“I don’t have a clue,” Sansa chimed in. “And Jaime has told me a lot about you.”

“You shush,” Jaime said. Sansa simply laughed.

vellichor - This mesmerizing story of a world-renowned violinist and a used-bookstore owner is told via before & after segments that reveal the development of the characters and of this beautiful relationship.

Excerpt:

So he does not let himself falter as he surveys the audience, sketching out a half-bow before lifting the violin and settling it against his shoulder. His bow is still loose in his right hand, and it trembles when he goes to raise it, the scars protesting a motion he has done a million times.

Those watching will see his hesitation as part of the show, the spectacle—a prolonging of his grand return is what the articles will say tomorrow morning. They will not see the terror that jolts through his body, the fingers of his left hand pressing harder against the strings. They will not see his eyes wandering over to a box on the left side of the hall, the box where a few people he has carefully chosen sit, leaning forward along with the rest.

They will not see how he searches for a tall woman sitting among them, nor will they see the ache that takes hold of his heart when the spotlight blinds him and he is unable to push through the curtain of brilliance to see if she is there.

#jaime x brienne fic exchange 2021 #jaime-brienne-fic-exchange #braime fic recs #braime AUs #jb fic recs #braime fic reccs #jb fic reccs #jaime x brienne

16 notes · View notes

ddagent · 4 years ago

Note

Hiii if hot Instagram dad Jaime maybe decided he wanted to do some fun maiden day activities to post onto his account and dragged long suffering Brienne into it, I would love that. (I will die for that universe)

Thank you so much for the prompt, Anon! This is not *quite* what you asked for; consider it a mild reboot of the insta!dad Jaime ‘verse. I hope you enjoy it all the same.

“This is a passenger announcement. Flight 8OATH7 to Storm’s End is delayed. Please check the departures board for further information.”

Brienne let out an almighty groan that was shared between her and the other passengers wanting to leave Braavos. A quick glance to the departures board showed that the two-minute adjustment in departure time had now extended a full two hours. Several of her fellow passengers headed off to the bar or duty-free shops. Brienne just slumped into her seat. At least it wasn’t Sevenmas she was missing. Just Maiden’s Day.

Oh, but she was really looking forward to spending Maiden’s Day with Jaime.

Slipping her phone out of her pocket, Brienne scrolled to Home and pressed the call button. After a few rings, a confident little voice answered. “Lannister-Tarth residence. This is Catelyn speaking. Who are you?”

Brienne felt herself beaming at her eldest daughter’s phone manner. “Cat, it’s Mummy. Is Daddy around?”

“Mummy! When are you coming back? We miss you!”

“I miss you too, Little Lion. I’ll be home soon. Can you put Daddy on?”

“Sure.”

There was a clunk, then a long pause, before Jaime came on the phone. Excited babbles came over the line, and Brienne could just envision Jaime in their foyer at Evenfall, holding their youngest in his arms. “Hey. Everything okay?”

“Not great. I’m stuck in Braavos; there’s not a flight out for at least two hours. I don’t think I’m going to get home today.”

“It’s okay, Brienne. We can celebrate Maiden’s Day tomorrow, or the next day, or whenever. Love you.”

“Love you too.”

Ending the call, Brienne settled back into the uncomfortable plastic seat made for a person at least a foot shorter than her. The other passengers were on their phones, playing games such as Angry Dragons or Game of Tarts; more than a few were scrolling through social media. Brienne followed suit. She opened up her ravenmail account and replied to a few emails; the university wanting an update on her latest findings. Unfortunately, the Braavosi artefacts she had been sent to authenticate were frauds. After she’d done that and sent a text to her Dad, asking him to check in on Jaime and the kids, she went to open up her own accounts. That’s when she heard it.

“—I guess we’ll have to celebrate another night. Sweetling, we love you, and I can’t wait for you to get home.”

Two seats down were three young women dressed for sun and fun rather than Brienne’s ill-fitting business suit. They were staring longingly at one of their phones. “He is just so hot. He’s such a great dad and clearly an amazing husband.”

“Did you see the snap of him doing topless push-ups with his kids on his back? Oh-em-gee, I nearly died.”

“What about the one at the zoo? All tanned and muscular picking his daughter up to look at the lion cage? He is hot a-eff. I swear, every time I look at his Quip feed, my ovaries hurt.”

The three young women continued to drool over Brienne’s husband, or the hot Dad at kingofthe_pride. He’d had the Quip account since Catelyn was born, wanting to show off adorable pictures of their baby girl while he was a stay-at-home-dad. The account had grown popular as Jaime was earnest, loving, and downright gorgeous. Users on Quip had followed him from being a first-time Dad to looking after their boy, Brynden, and their youngest, Joanna. It brought in a little sponsorship money and a lot of unwelcome DMs. He screenshotted her the best ones, along with some personal pics just for her.

Loading Quip, Brienne found Jaime’s most recent story. He was in their garden, Joanna climbing on his shoulder while the other two gathered round to stare at the phone. “So, I just got a call from my wife that she’s stuck in an airport departure lounge and won’t be able to come home tonight. Which is a shame, because these three cubs were going to stay at Grandad’s.”

Jaime offered the camera a sultry wink that would melt most women. Hells, Brienne had been married to him for nine years, and she was still a puddle! “I guess we’ll have to celebrate another night. Sweetling, we love you, and I can’t wait for you to get home.”

All three of their children waved at the camera; Brynden and Ser Roar blowing her a kiss. It disappeared onto the next story – Jaime’s sister, Cersei, wine tasting at her vineyard in Dorne – before Brienne clicked back to his account. There was another post already.

“Oh–em–gee, they’re making Maiden’s Day cards together.”

The picture was, in fact, in the children’s playroom. The large mahogany table that had once sat knights of old was now covered in card, glitter, and felt tip pens. Jaime’s shoulder-length hair was pulled off his face, his grin wide and bright, as Joanna helped him pour sapphire-blue glitter into the shape of a heart. Brynden was working on his letters in his own handmade Maiden’s Day card. Catelyn was drawing something else.

kingofthe_pride: Couldn’t get to the shops, B. Handmade okay?

Brienne chuckled, especially at the next picture of Jaime holding up Catelyn’s drawing of Ser Galladon of Morne and his sword.

kingofthe_pride: Little Lion misunderstood the task. Think you might enjoy it better than mine.

Already the picture had a ton of likes and plenty of comments. Brienne tried to avoid deciphering the string of emojis following several of them; instead, she focused on the smiles of her husband and children. An email from the university diverted her attention, but, when she returned, there was another post from Jaime.

kingofthe_pride: All your partner wants for M-Day is flowers, chocolates, and a sword.

It was a photo of Jaime in the Evenfall museum on Tarth; a crimson bow attached to the exhibit glass holding Oathkeeper. Brienne barked out a laugh, startling a few nearby passengers including the young women who had been drooling over her husband. The next few posts were equally touching: Jaime and the children making flower crowns (#myqueenofloveandbeauty); Jaime and the children making chocolate cupcakes (#knight-feast).

Shaking her head, Brienne opened up her messenger app and found her husband’s name.

B: I love you. Ser Husband: I know. I’m very lovable. B: And modest. Ser Husband: Well, that picture of me with a flower crown has over 600 likes already. Ser Husband: I just wanted to lift your spirits while you’re stuck in a dingy airport lounge. B: You did. Thank you ♥ Ser Husband: Would you like a kingofthe_pride exclusive? B: Always.

The next photo was a selfie. Jaime was in her study; the last of the afternoon light streaming in and highlighting the blonde in his hair and the crow’s feet around his eyes. The angle was off: there were no pixels of his muscular arms or tight abs. He was just a forty-year-old Dad taking a poorly aimed selfie, and staring at the camera with so much love it made her heart ache.

B: I miss you. Ser Husband: I miss you, too.

“This is a passenger announcement. Flight 8OATH7 to Storm’s End is now boarding Please check your ticket information and proceed to Gate 14.”

B: See you soon x

#Anonymous #braime #jaime x brienne #ship: braime #mine: paragraph prompts #brienne is clearly 'ser wife' in his phone

67 notes · View notes

aliveanddrunkonsunlight · 4 years ago

Text

acts of service

acts of service is not about household chores, it’s about trust and real needs; a good act of service should communicate “I got you”; Jaime x Brienne + love languages based off @observedchaos post

For @naomignome

Author’s Note: TW for pregnancy (not graphic); thoughts about motherhood

She cannot believe she traveled across the whole kingdom in her state to attend a wedding, but the Lord of Casterly Rock deserved celebration, so she was here.

At seven months pregnant, her stomach precedes her everywhere. There’s a dull, throbbing pain when she wakes and trying to roll over onto her back is a feat these days. The man beside her stirs, his eyes blinking awake when she’s finally able to get comfortable sitting up against the pillows. Seeing her frustrated so early in the day makes his forehead wrinkle with concern. “Are you alright?”

“No,” she sighs, tears springing to her eyes. Once she’d gotten past the months of nausea, the tears had begun. She cries at everything now. Releasing a frustrated noise in her throat, she wipes angrily at her eyes. “I’m tired.”

“I know,” he murmurs. “But the baby will be here soon and then it will be over.”

Somehow the thought of her being responsible for a tiny human being is not reassuring. “Oh gods.”

“Well, this part will be over,” he amends quickly. “The rest of it…”

She shoves his shoulder. “You are not helping.”

He sits up beside her, reaching to tuck a piece of hair behind her ear. It’s grown long, nearly past her shoulders, too busy with her duties as Evenstar and preparing for their child to cut it. “You’re going to be amazing. You are amazing.” His hand smoothes across her swollen belly. “We’re very, very lucky to have you.”

His words are making her teary-eyed again. “I love you.”

“I know,” he smiles, his green eyes twinkling. “I love you.”

“I love you so much,” she breathes. “Though maybe not enough to do this again.”

“Fair enough,” he laughs. “Let’s get you dressed.” Jaime has taken to helping her in the mornings. She can do it on her own, but it takes her twice as long around her stomach. He lifts her nightshirt over her head, pausing a moment to let his eyes linger on her body. Her instinct is to hide herself from him, so unlike the knight she used to be. He drops a kiss to her stomach and another to her mouth before he retrieves a fresh tunic and breeches for her.

She has kept the seamstresses on Tarth busy, always needing ever larger items of clothing. “Like dressing a giant,” she murmurs as Jaime bends down, pulling the pants up her legs.

“Beautiful and strong, as always,” he says softly, stepping in to press a kiss to her forehead.

Brienne tugs on his sleeve, keeping him close. “Thank you.” He has been nothing but understanding and helpful over these past months and his gentleness, his unwavering love makes her feel ungrateful.

When she found out she was with child, she kept it from Jaime for several days. Brienne wasn’t unhappy, exactly, but there had been little excitement on her part. Only nerves. She was scared of what might happen during the birth, scared of how her body might change after she spent so long honing it in the yard. Brienne did not remember her own mother, Jaime had lost his when Tyrion was born, and her father was distant for most of her childhood.

As uncertain as she was about her own abilities as a parent, she had none about Jaime’s. He rarely spoke about his children, but she knew he wished he’d been involved in their lives.

When she finally told Jaime, there had been an excited smile on his face, at least until she’d unexpectedly burst into tears. He gathered her in his arms, making soothing strokes up and down her spine until she calmed down. “Will you talk to me, love? Please.”

There is really nothing except time and experience which will make her feel prepared to be a mother, but his reassurance, all the little daily acts of love that he thought she didn’t notice, but she very much did, eased her worries. Brienne hates asking for help and the past few months, she has not needed to, because he has anticipated so many of her needs. Perhaps not all of the strange cravings, but he made many trips to the kitchens in her stead.

The wedding ceremony is not until the late afternoon and as much as she encourages Jaime to go off and see the grounds or do whatever he likes, he refuses to leave her side. “You’re stubborn. When is the next time we’ll be at the Rock? You should spend time with your brother.”

“I’m stubborn? I am? Do you have any idea what it’s like being married to you?” She should be offended, but she simply laughs, the loud, braying laugh she tried to hide for so long. Jaime is grinning and reaches to help her to her feet. “Come, wife,” he teases. “I should quite like a bath before the ceremony.”

His lips brush the shell of her ear and it makes her feel as if she’s coming out of her skin, fingers clutching at the fabric of his tunic. His fingers unlace her breeches and she sucks in a breath over her teeth. He keeps drawing near and then pulling away again. His mouth nips at her neck, teeth dragging across her lower lip, but when he steers her away from the bed, Brienne is confused. “What are you-”

“I wanted a bath, remember?” At her hesitation, he takes her hand, and leads her around the screen which is set up in front of the metal tub. Jaime pours the steaming water from the large kettle which is resting over the fire into the tub. He strips off his clothing and sinks down into the water with a groan that makes her knees tremble. “Brienne,” he waves her over.

“I can’t fit, not with you.” She rubs the swell of her stomach absent-mindedly. Some days it feels as if she cannot even stand up straight. Everything feels heavy. The weight of her stomach, her breasts larger, her shoulders rounding forward.

“Nonsense. Come here.” He stands, the water splashing around his legs.

He is somehow leaner than when they married, the planes of muscle from years of fighting have barely softened at all and she cannot tear her eyes away from how the droplets of water roll down his skin.

Jaime climbs out of the tub to help her in and then settles himself behind her, his legs wrapping around and pressing against her own. She sits forward, but he demands in a kind voice, “Lean back, please.”

“I’m too heavy.”

“I want to hold you.” His fingers trace along her shoulder.

“I can barely be held.”

He sighs, knowing her well enough to know that sometimes her stubbornness simply needs time. “I will wash your back then.” He scrubs gently and she allows an approving noise to escape when his hand travels up her spine. “Your back hurts.” It’s not a question, but she nods slowly. “Where?” She points to her lower back and her shoulders. His stump at her hip, he tries to massage the spots with his left hand, her appreciation murmured in grunts and sighs. Jaime rakes his hand through her hair, fingers smoothing through the strands along her neck. “There are times when I think I cannot be more in awe of you but you always prove me wrong. Did you know that?” She shakes her head. “Come here.” He pats his chest and she leans back against him, allowing him to carry some of her stress.

As the heat of his body wraps around her and she is in the solid weight of his arms, her worry begins to melt away into the water.

“Ever since I found out, I never doubted that you will make a wonderful father. Did you know that?”

“No.” His voice is barely above a whisper.

“Never doubted it for a moment.” She pulls his arms even tighter around her.

“Thank you,” he murmurs, tucking his chin into the curve of her shoulder.

#jaime x brienne #fic: acts of service #love languages #tw: pregnancy

74 notes · View notes

thecaffeinebookwarrior · 5 years ago

Text

The Many Faces of the Strong Female Character

The much-requested, positive counterpart to my classic “Female Characters to Avoid in Your Writing” and it’s much-later sequel.

Here, I will discuss some of my favorite fictional ladies and what makes them work so well; given my rapturous love of women, there will probably be a sequel! In the meantime, I talk more about portraying female characters here.

Happy writing, everybody! <3

1.) The Warrior

(Gif credit.)

When most people hear “strong female character,” they picture the most popular definition of the term: a stony-faced, emotionally shallow, conventionally attractive broad who punches and kicks stuff. She may occasionally shout things like, “I DON’T NEED NO MAN,” while perhaps punching a small baby.

I decided to start with my wife Diana, because she is the perfect antithesis of this trope. She isn’t stony, she’s courageous. She’s unabashed about showing her doubts, hopes, affections, and optimism. Her love interest never steals her spotlight, but she feels no need to shun romance to appear “strong.” She’s beautiful, but not sexualized or objectified.

And while most Strong Female Characters™ are ironically reduced to damsels in distress at some point in their own narratives, Diana consistently takes the lead, totally autonomous over her own story.

You can kick ass AND love babies, people. Joss Whedon, please take notes.

(Gif credit)

Other examples: Okoye from Black Panther, Furiosa from Mad Max: Fury Road, Rey from Star Wars, and Ser Brienne of Tarth from Game of Thrones.

2.) The Comedian

(Gif source)

If you haven’t watched Chewing Gum on Netflix, stop whatever you’re doing and watch it right now. Its relatively simple premise – a twenty-four-year-old from a fundamentalist Christian household struggles to lose her virginity – is a segway into a hilarious, genuine exploration of human sexuality, relationships, and how we forge our identities.

Brilliantly portrayed by the series’ creator, Michaela Coel, Tracy is essentially that one friend who knows exactly what you’ve been thinking and isn’t afraid to say so. She is never relegated to a single trope or stereotype. She’s stumbling, clumsily but enthusiastically, through the life experiences that shape us. Most importantly, she is allowed to be sexually curious, awkward, aggressive, insecure, and – I can’t stress this enough – hilarious. The dialogue is infinitely quotable, and endlessly relatable.

(Image source)

Watching shows like Chewing Gum makes me realize how few female characters – and even fe wer Black female characters – are portrayed as truly human. Typically, they’re allowed to be sexy, but not sexual. They’re allowed to be awkward, but only if it’s cute. They can be insecure, but only if that insecurity can easily be solved by the affirmations of a male love interest. And they’re rarely allowed to be the main source of a series’ comedy.

So remember: let your female characters be human. Let them be awkward, funny, sexual philosophers. It’s easier than you think.

(Gif source)

Other examples: Abbi and Ilan from Broad City, Leslie from Parks and Rec, Tina from Bob’s Burgers.

3.) The Drama Queen

(Gif source)

Watching Riverdale is like hurtling along on a structurally unstable rollercoaster. It’s utterly insane, a lot of fun, and once you’re on, you can’t stop.

But amidst the explosions of batshit crazy plot points, killer cults, and the existential perplexity of finding yourself attracted to emo Jughead, there are some real gems. One of these is Cheryl Blossom, and pretty much every plot line surrounding her.

Cheryl is introduced as a fairly one-dimensional, catty mean girl, though the Regina George-esque charisma with which she’s portrayed makes her instantly likable. Initially, we expect her to be a character we’ll love to hate.

(Gif source)

And yet, within the first few episodes, I was impressed by how layered and complex her motivations were. Much of contempt towards others was misdirected rage from an upbringing of extreme emotional abuse, and grief over her dead brother -- all portrayed without a Snape-style condonation of said behavior. By the end of season one, my thoughts were generally, “Oh, crap, I don’t think I can claim to be watching this ‘ironically’ anymore,” and “MORE CHERYL.”

(Gif source)

Season two answered my wish, and then some. Cheryl was saved from an (impressively conscientiously portrayed) attempt at sexual assault by a pack of her female friends, and her attacker got the shit beat out of him in one of the most cathartic moments of modern television.

To the exaltation of my queer heart, she also came out as a lesbian, in a deeply moving story arc that I never would have expected from this show. Without spoiling too much, she and her new love interest kissing in front of anti-gay propaganda footage was legitimately one of the most powerful moments I have ever witnessed.

(Gif source)

Before the season was over, she viciously threatened her abusive, homophobic mother while covered in blood, shot a serial killer with a bow and arrow, and joined a gang. If that’s not gay culture, I don’t know what is.

Oh, how I wish this show was just about her.

Other examples: Alexis from Schitt’s Creek.

4.) The Lovable Bastard

(Gif source)

Ah, The Good Place. I have never experienced such a breath of comedic fresh air. A new philosophical principle each episode, examined and applied in hilarious and thought-provoking ways. A complete absence of harmful stereotypes. Incredibly lovable, three-dimensional, and ever-evolving characters.

I was considering using my queen Tahani for this list, who externally larger-than-life and internally vulnerable after emotional abuse by her parents. Also, she’s hilarious. Everyone and everything in The Good Place is hilarious. And I also thought about talking about Janet, who is the best character in anything ever, but of course:

(Gif source)

Instead, I’ll be talking about bisexual icon Eleanor, who is something very few female characters get to be: the lovable bastard.

(Gif source)

Eleanor, when we first meet her, is not traditionally good in any sense of the word. She turned down a high-paying job because she was expected to be nice to people. She sold placebos to the elderly, and was great at it. She was drunken, slovenly, hedonistic, and selfish. And she’s instantly incredibly likable.

Why and how Eleanor is so enjoyable, even at her very worst, merits an essay all its own. But in a nutshell:

We empathize with her. We are introduced to “The Good Place” completely through her eyes. We are in her shoes.

The stakes are high. When we discover that her entry into the good place was a mistake, we want her to be okay.

We come to understand her, and how her terrible childhood shaped her destructive behavior.

She wants to be a better person, and with time, effort, and character development, we watch her become one.

Not only is this an amazing lesson in how to endear audiences to your character, it is also infinitely refreshing. The most famous lovable bastards are all men -- Han Solo, Dr. House, Captain Jack Sparrow, the Man With No Name, et cetera -- but women are rarely afforded the same moral complexity. If a woman in fiction has done bad things, she’s not usually a lovable bastard. She’s usually a bitch.

Eleanor isn’t just a great character. She conveys an important lesson: women are people. People with the same capacity for mistakes, growth, redemption, and love as anyone else.

(Image source)

Other examples: Chloe from Don’t Trust the B*tch in Apartment 23

5.) The Cinderella

(Gif source)

Yep. I said it. Cinderella is a strong female character.

My girl not only survived in an abusive household, she persistently stayed positive. She worked each day to make the best of an impossible situation, from which she had no means of escape. That takes an insane amount of courage and tenacity.

But Caff, I hear you scream, she needed help to escape!! Well, my imaginary counterargument, so the fuck what? MOST people need help to escape their abusive situations, and there’s no shame in that. Accepting help from someone you trust is the best thing you can do in a situation such as that, and implying otherwise is horribly damaging to victims of abuse.

But she married the prince, you more feebly protest. Yes! She did! She found love and happiness and a great life in a socially influential position! And that’s an amazing message!

So in the flurry of female warriors, let’s not forget Cinderella, who tells people that their terrible circumstances won’t last forever, to stay hopeful and kind, and that accepting help from a trusted friend can lead to a happy life.

Cinderella is a bad bitch, and she deserves her happily ever after.

(Gif source)

Other examples: For some reason, I’m thinking of Sansa from Game of Thrones. When people try to discredit her as a strong character, they often make similar complaints. But both, quite fittingly, end up as queens.

5K notes · View notes

madamebaggio · 4 years ago

Text

Complete Ships’ List

So… I started doing this mostly out of curiosity. I never thought it’d get this extreme.

I had no idea I shipped so many people.

Now this list contains ships I’ve written about. I didn’t include ships I wrote only as a request, and I also didn’t add ships that I just ship (Like Gisele and Han, from Fast & Furious, for example) or ships that I read about but don’t write (like Crowley and Aziraphale in Good Omens). Normally when I don’t write about a ship is because I don’t feel like I can’t portray them well or because I’m happy enough with what canon gave me (that’s really rare).

Anyway. If the ship is on the list, I’ve written at least something about them

I’m putting this down here more out of curiosity for you all. I know sometimes I say ‘a ship that I ship’ and maybe you’re all in doubt about what would that be.

If you find out I forgot one, let me know.

If a ship isn’t here it doesn’t mean I don’t ship it. My list of unshippables isn’t that long (I think).

OH btw... This isn’t in any particular order.

Robb Stark (Game of Thrones) X Arthur Pendragon (King Arthur: Legend of the Sword)

Tauriel (The Hobbit) x Valkyrie (MCU)

Napoleon Solo (The Man From U.N.C.L.E.) X Miriam “Midge” Maisel (The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel)

Lara Croft (Tomb Raider) X Diana Prince (Wonder Woman)

Vortigern Pendragon (King Arthur: Legend of the Sword) x Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones)

Erik Lehnsherr (X-Men: First Class) X Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia)

James T. Kirk (Star Trek) X Rey (Star Wars)

Klaus Mikaelson (The Originals) x Kisa | Santanico Pandemonium (From Dusk Till Dawn: The Series)

Daisy “Quake” Johnson (Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.) X Gary “Eggsy” Unwin (Kingsman)

Blair Waldorf (Gossip Girl) X Stiles Stilinski (Teen Wolf)

Beverly Marsh (It) x Eleven | Jane Hopper (Stranger Things)

Matt Murdock (Daredevil) X Selina Kyle (Catwoman)

Lydia Martin (Teen Wolf) X Bucky Barnes (MCU)

Natasha Romanoff (MCU) X John Wick (John Wick)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Derek Hale (Teen Wolf)

Joseph Dredd (Dredd) x Octavia Blake (The 100)

Maria Hill (MCU) x Merlin (Kingsman)

Thranduil (The Hobbit) X Loki Odinson (MCU)

Steve Rogers (MCU) x Mera (DCU)

Dean Winchester (Supernatural) x Wynonna Earp (Wynonna Earp)

Daenerys Targaryen (Game of Thrones) x Clarke Griffin (The 100)

Ravenna (Snow White and the Huntsman) X Morgana (Merlin)

Murphy and Connor MacManus (The Boondock Saints) x Anna Poliatova (Anna)

Frank Martin (The Transporter) x Lorraine Broughton (Atomic Blonde)

Baby Doll (Sucker Punch) x Priest (Priest)

Gretel (Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters) X Prince Nuada (Hellboy: The Golden Army)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) X Roan (The 100)

Maleficent (Maleficent) X Jareth (The Labyrinth)

Dutch (Killjoys) x Leonard McCoy (Star Trek)

Sam Winchester (Supernatural) X Felicity Smoak (Arrow)

Diana Bishop (A Discovery of Witches) x John Constantine (Constantine)

Queen Freya (The Huntsman: Winter’s Wars) x Conan (Conan The Barbarian)

Roxy Morton (Kingsman) x Leo Fitz and Jemma Simmons (Agents of the S.H.I.E.L.D.)

Faramir (The Lord of the Rings) x Jon Snow (Game of Thrones)

Lucian (Underworld) x Tamara (Conan The Barbarian)

Snake Eyes (G.I. Joe) x Katia Von Dees (Hitman Agent 47)

Rosa Diaz (Brooklyn 99) x Kate Kane (Batwoman)

Darth Maul (Star Wars) x Lady Jaye (G.I. Joe)

Hattie Shaw (Hobbs & Shaw) x Jane Kano (Charlie’s Angels)

Face (The A-Team) x Han Cho Bai (Red 2)

Jacob Hood (Eleventh Hour) X Santiago “Pope” Garcia (Triple Frontier)

Selene (Underworld) x Mina Harker (The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen)

47 (Hitman) x Elena (Charlie’s Angels)

Dagonet (King Arthur) x Brienne of Tarth (Game of Thrones)

Borra (Maleficent: Mistress of Evil) x Catia (King Arthur: Legend of the Sword)

Diaval (Maleficent) x Yennefer (The Witcher)

Sabina Wilson (Charlie’s Angels) x Daphne Kluger (Ocean’s Eight)

Lady Sif (MCU) x Sara (The Huntsman)

Chris Argent (Teen Wolf) x Madison Maxwell (Dollface)

Frank Castle (The Punisher) x Grace (Ready or Not)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Arthur Pendragon (King Arthur: Legend of the Sword)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Merlin (Kingsman)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Ray Smith (The Gentlemen)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Theon Greyjoy (Game of Thrones)

Robb Stark (Game of Thrones) x Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones)

Éowyn (The Lord of the Rings) x The Weeping Monk (Cursed)

Lucy Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Faramir (The Lord of the Rings)

Boromir (The Lord of the Rings) x Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Éomer (The Lord of the Rings)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Legolas (The Lord of the Rings)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Éomer (The Lord of the Rings)

Castiel (Supernatural) x Bee (The Babysitter)

Matt Murdock (Daredevil) x Jessica Jones (Jessica Jones)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Frank Castle (The Punisher)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Matt Murdock (Daredevil)

47 (Hitman: Agent 47) x Shana ‘Scarlett’ O’Hara (G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Jon Snow (Game of Thrones)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Yon-Rogg (Captain Marvel)

Thranduil (The Hobbit) x Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones)

Roan (The 100) x Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones)

Nuada (Hellboy) x Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones)

Brock Rumlow (MCU) x Darcy Lewis (MCU)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Tommy Shelby (Peaky Blinders)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Tommy Shelby (Peaky Blinders) x Alfie Solommons (Peaky Blinders)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Alfie Solommons (Peaky Blinders)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Jax Teller (Sons of Anarchy)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Willas Tyrell (Game of Thrones)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Willas Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Oberyn Martell (Game of Thrones)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Gawain (King Arthur)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Galahad (King Arthur)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Steve Rogers (MCU)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Loki (MCU)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Steve Rogers (MCU) x Bucky Barnes (MCU)

Sherlock Holmes (Enola Holmes) x Jamie Moriarty (Elementary)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Marcus (Underworld)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Lucian (Underworld)

Storm Shadow (G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra) x Madam M. (Hobbs & Shaw)

Shana ‘Scarlett’ O’Hara (G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra) x Darth Maul (Star Wars)

Darth Maul (Star Wars) x Gretel (Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Derek Hale (Teen Wolf)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Draco Malfoy (Harry Potter)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Thor (MCU)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Thorin Oakenshield (The Hobbit)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Bucky Barnes (MCU)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) X Geralt of Rivia (The Witcher)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) X Prince Vlad (Dracula: Untold)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Borra (Maleficent: Mistress of Evil)

Robb Stark (Game of Thrones) x Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia)

Gretel (Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters) x Aramis (The Three Musketeers)

Éomer (The Lord of the Rings) x Lothíriel (The Lord of the Rings)

Éowyn (The Lord of the Rings) x Faramir (The Lord of the Rings)

James Potter (Harry Potter) x Lily Evans (Harry Potter)

Jon Snow (Game of Thrones x Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones x Peter Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia)

Female Tony Stark (MCU) x Steve Rogers (MCU)

Jane Foster (MCU) x Jack Rollins (MCU)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Raleigh Becket (Pacific Rim)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Merlin (Kingsman)

Eggsy Unwin (Kingsman) x Chelsea (St. Trinian’s)

Anne Shirley Cuthbert (Anne with an E) x Gilbert Blythe (Anne with an E)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Jarvis (MCU)

Debbie Ocean (Ocean’s 8) x John Wick (John Wick)

Bluebell Baggins (The Hobbit) x Thorin Oakenshield (The Hobbit)

Daenerys Targeryen (Game of Thrones) x Yennefer of Venberg (The Witcher)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Darth Maul (Star Wars)

Padmé Amidala (Star Wars) x Obi-Wan Kenobi (Star Wars)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Brock Rumlow (MCU) x Jack Rollins (MCU)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Phil Coulson (MCU)

Tristan (King Arthur) x The Mage (King Arthur: Legend of the Sword)

Gawain (King Arthur) x Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia)

Éowyn (The Lord of the Rings) x Lancelot (King Arthur)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Robin of Loxley (Robin Hood)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Legolas (The Lord of Rings)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Guy of Gisborne (BBC Robin Hood)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Arthur Pendragon (King Arthur: Legend of the Sword)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Faramir (The Lord of the Rings)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Faramir (The Lord of the Rings)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Rollo Lothbrok (Vikings)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Galahad (King Arthur)

Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones) x Robb Stark (Game of Thrones) x Jon Snow (Game of Thrones)

Kíli (The Hobbit) x Tauriel (The Hobbit)

Yara Greyjoy (Game of Thrones) x Daenerys Targeryen (Game of Thrones)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Legolas

Bran Stark (Game of Thrones) x Edmund Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia)

Pepper Potts (MCU) x Phil Coulson (MCU)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Pietro Maximoff (MCU)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Steve Rogers (MCU)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Bucky Barnes (MCU)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Steve Rogers (MCU) x Bucky Barnes (MCU)

Arya Stark (Game of Thrones) x Gendry Waters (Game of Thrones)

Lara Croft (Lara Croft: Tomb Raider) x Sydney Fox (Relic Hunter)

Lydia Martin (Teen Wolf) x Jon Snow (Game of Thrones)

Black Hat (Priest 2011) x Kisa (From Dusk Till Dawn: The Series)

Vortigern Pendragon (King Arthur: Legend of the Sword) x Ravenna (Snow White and the Huntsman)

Borra (Maleficent: Mistress of Evil) x Gretel (Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters)

Jemma Simmons (Agents of SHIELD) x John Kennex (Almost Human)

Anna Valerious (Van Helsing) x Gretel

Éomer (The Lord of the Rings) x Princess Tamina (Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time)

Sabina Wilson (Charlie’s Angels) x Dinah Lance (Birds of Prey)

Jon Snow (Game of Thrones) x Geralt of Rivia (The Witcher)

Chris Argent (Teen Wolf) x Gretel (Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters)

Black Hat (Priest) x Gretel (Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters)

Frank Castle (The Punisher) x Darcy Lewis (MCU)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Arthur Curry (Aquaman)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Mando (The Mandalorian)

Booker (The Old Guard) x Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Thranduil (The Hobbit)

Aramis (The Three Musketeers) x Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Stelios (300)

Lucifer (Lucifer) x Kisa (From Dusk Till Dawn: The Series)

Lucian (Underworld) x Kisa (From Dusk Till Dawn: The Series)

Kisa (From Dusk Till Dawn: The Series) x Dean Winchester (Supernatural)

47 (Hitman: Agent 47) x Madam M (Hobbs & Shaw)

Michael (Legion) x Bee (The Babysitter)

Claire Dearing (Jurassic Wolrd) x Harvey Russell (Rampage)

Lancelot/The Weeping Monk (Cursed) x Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Obi-Wan Kenobi (Star Wars)

Jinx (G.I. Joe: Retalliation) x Raizo (Ninja Assassin)

Chen Leong (Snakes on a plane) x Mercedes (Snakes on a plane)

Ben Daimio (Hellboy) x Alice Monaghan (Hellboy)

Mika Coretti (Ninja Assassin) x Raizo (Ninja Assassin)

Sarah Wilson (The Falcon and The Winter Soldier) x Bucky Barnes (MCU)

Steve Rogers (MCU) x Bucky Barnes (MCU)

Ray Smith (The Gentlemen) x Bucky Barnes (MCU)

Parker x Alec Hardison x Eliot Spencer (Leverage)

Ada Shelby (Peaky Blinders) x Robb Stark (Game of Thrones)

Frank Castle (The Punisher) x Evelyn Salt (Salt)

Frank Castle (The Punisher) x Lara Croft (Tomb Raider)

Erik Lehnsherr (X-Men: First Class) x Sansa Stark (Game of Thrones)

Éomer (The Lord of the Rings) x Diana (Wonder Woman)

John Grimm (Doom) x Scarlett O’Hara (G.I. Joe)

Joseph Dredd (Dredd) x Maiko Mori (Pacific Rim)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Leonard “Bones” McCoy (Star Trek)

Black Hat (Priest) x Alice (Resident Evil)

John Kennex (Almost Human) x Claire Dearing (Jurassic World)

Jaylah (Star Trek Beyond) x Valkyrie (MCU)

Captain James Hook (Peter Pan) x Morgana (Merlin)

Jane Sloan (The Bold Type) x Chris Argent (Teen Wolf)

Jane Sloan (The Bold Type) x James “Bucky” Barnes (MCU)

Steve Rogers (MCU) x Jane Sloan (The Bold Type)

Jane Sloan (The Bold Type) x Merlin (Kingsman)

Loki Odinson (MCU) x Darcy Lewis (MCU)

Lou (Ocean’s 8) x Scarlet (Milkshake Gunpowder)

Gillian Owens (Practical Magic) x Dean Winchester (Supernatural)

Nine Ball (Ocean’s 8) x Jess (Focus)

Phryne Fisher (Miss Fisher’s Murder Mysteries) x Tommy Shelby (Peaky Blinders)

Brock Rumlow (MCU) x Lindy (Jolt)

Frank Castle (The Punisher) x Lindy (Jolt)

The Font Demon (The New Adventures of Monkey) x Tamara (Conan the Barbarian 2011)

The Font Demon (The New Adventures of Monkey) x Yennefer of Vengerberg (The Witcher)

Darth Maul (Star Wars) x Octavia Blake (The 100)

Nina Zenik (Shadow and Bone) x Jon Snow (Game of Thrones)

Nina Zenik (Shadow and Bone) x Geralt of Rivia (The Witcher)

Prince Nuada (Hellboy) x Lara Croft (Lara Croft: Tomb Raider)

Prince Nuada (Hellboy) x Lydia Martin (Teen Wolf)

Bilbo Baggins (The Hobbit) x Thorin Oakenshield (The Hobbit)

Ray Smith (The Gentlemen) x Darcy Lewis (MCU)

Xu Xialing (MCU) x Razor Fist (MCU)

Jaskier (The Witcher) x Jesper Fahey (Shadow and Bone)

Lara Croft (Tomb Raider) x Lu Ren (Tomb Raider)

Mace Browne (The 355) x Maria Schmidt (The 355)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Steve Rogers (MCU)

Susan Pevensie (The Chronicles of Narnia) x Loki Odinson (MCU)

Mikaela Banes (Transformers) x Han (The Fast & The Furious) x Raleigh Becket (Pacific Rim)

Margaery Tyrell (Game of Thrones) x Galahad (King Arthur 2004) x Erik (The Last Kingdom)

Merlin (The Kingsman) x Madame M (Hobbs and Shaw) x Lara Croft (Tomb Raider)

Yennefer of Venberg (The Witcher) x Geralt of Rivia (The Witcher) x Gretel (Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters)

Darcy Lewis (MCU) x Frank Castle (The Punisher) x Brock Rumlow (MCU)

Mr. Quinlan (The Strain) x Gretel (Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters)

Mr Quinlan (The Strain) x Lara Croft (Tomb Raider)

Merlin (The Kingsman) x Madame M (Hobbs and Shaw)

#madame baggio #multiple ships #Crossover Pairings #crackship #a whole lotta ships #why is this my life #i might organize this later #one of these days

43 notes · View notes

firesign23 · 4 years ago

Note

Oh man, I saw this prompt and was like “Oh yes, I love this trope!!!” and then my bastard brain went “But what if you really lean into it--they’re both knights, they know the dangers, so what if instead of it being an easily resolved part of the job it leads to serious problems?” Like chill, you bastard, I just wanted panicked fucking. Alas, it is a short fic about Brienne’s self-sacrificial nature in a modern AU. It’s an angstyish one.

You caught me doing something dangerous and flipped out

Brienne eased open the front door, slipped inside and quietly removed her coat and shoes. Scrunched her nose at the fresh waft of smoke that she’d believed herself numb to. Moved into the living room. With any luck Jaime would already be in bed.

He wasn’t.

He was on their couch, his usually sprawled form wound tight. His prosthetic wasn’t on, she noticed, and his short sleeves showed the burns halfway up his forearm.

He didn’t even look up. “Addam called.”

She should have moved stations, after the incident. Somewhere they didn’t know Jaime, didn’t still see him as a member of the team. She hadn’t.

“He wasn’t there,” Brienne countered, braced for the fight. It was as familiar as breathing by now. “I made a call.”

“You made a stupid call.”

“I saved a kid.”

A sigh.

“Jaime, I saved him.”

“Seventeen seconds. The building had a total structural collapse seventeen seconds after you got out. You’d been warned. It wasn’t a surprise.”

“No.”

She’d been on her way out, she had. But she’d heard crying and there’d been no choice, she had to try, had to--

“How many times is it this year?” he asked.

She didn’t know. More than he knew about. More than the average. Her silence was answer enough though, because he looked at the baby monitor on the side table, sighed again.

“She deserves better, Brienne.”

“Better than a mother who does her best?”

He couldn’t be asking that of her. He couldn’t. He knew what the job was like, still missed it.

“You…” He raked his hand through his hair, gave a low hiss. He’d yell soon, and she’d yell, and then they’d turn cold until the morning when it would be forgotten. Or not forgotten, perhaps, but carefully swept away because he understood. But he doesn’t. “You keep… It doesn’t matter how good you are. It doesn’t--”

“Jaime.”

“No, Brienne.” There was some of his bite, but it was quickly gone. “You are trying to prove something, and I don’t know why. Because you were new, or a woman, or after the... “ He exhaled. “You keep trying to prove something, and when you do you don’t feel like you’ve proven enough. There’s always something greater, some risk you take because you think it’s right. And I can’t… If you haven’t found it yet, you’re just going to keep looking. But I can’t…”

He stood up, fist clenching. She folded her arms across her chest.

“Can’t what?” she challenged, daring him to say it.

He gestured helplessly around the room. “I can’t keep living with the reminders of it, wondering whether you won’t come home. At least when you--” he stumbled over his words, straightened. “I’m taking Jeyne to Tarth for a few days, visit your dad, stay at the cottage. When I come back we can figure out custody.”

He stood, headed towards the stairs.

“Jaime…”

She didn’t know what she wanted to say, what she felt. Anger would make sense. Surprise. Grief, even. But she couldn't--it was the shock, perhaps, or… He raised a hand, shrugged. Looked back at her, a small and bitter smile on his face.

“No. I get it. The job is… it’s so easy for it to be everything. It’s important. Maybe you were right to… Maybe you were right, tonight. I always trusted your judgement.” Another sigh, exhaustion shading his familiar features, morphing them into something else. “But I can’t… I can’t let her be nothing either. If we… I can make her a life outside of the waiting and the worrying, and when your luck runs out, maybe there will be enough to keep the devastation from being total.”

That was unfair. It was the job, he knew the risks. Before she could find the words to argue back, tell him he was being ridiculous and he knew and he’d never minded before, he was gone up the stairs, into the dark.

Grabbing her coat and keys, Brienne headed back to the station. They could use the extra hands, after tonight.

#procrastination prompting #my fanfic

25 notes · View notes

everlarkficexchange · 5 years ago

Text

All the World's a Stage

Prompt 31: “We never see you two so much as kiss in public but last night we all heard you having sex.” Submitted by Buttercupbadass

Rated E (Explicit): Mainly for language because Johanna is a potty mouth and so are other certain characters whilst mid coitus okay I don’t make the rules here so there’s more than one f-bomb therefore we rate it E. Also sexual content.

Written by: @katnissdoesnotfollowback

Beta reading by: @stjohn27

************************

Act 1

Johanna Mason loves her neighbors. That is to say, she loves the entertainment they provide her with. It’s a rotating show of fabulous, ridiculous, and delicious drama, and she has a window to each and every one of their lives. Literally.

Victor’s Square is not exactly a square. It’s more of an elongated rectangle shaped building consisting of thirteen apartments, a workout room, a community center, and an office, with a hollowed out central area for a pool. Honestly, the pool is the reason she picked this place instead of The Arbor, which is pretty damn swanky but somehow they forgot to include a pool, of all things, when they added their five thousand luxury amenities. Since Johanna likes sunbathing and not golfing (ugh boring!), Victor’s Square won out.

The three story design of the building, and her luck in snagging the single apartment on top of the office, means that at some point in the day, barring sun glare on glass or inconvenient curtains, she can see directly into every other apartment on the rectangle. Hence the entertainment.

She’s been privy to all sorts of great shit, and none of them seem to know exactly what they’ve given her. The best part is, they’re clueless. As soon as she realized they were basically living their lives on a stage for her, Johanna started parading around her own place with the curtains wide open…while naked. Stark fucking naked. Just to see what would happen.

And nothing changed. No one complained. Which granted, she’s got a banging body. Axe wielding will do that, but she can think of at least half a dozen residents who’d be put off by her exhibitionism. And yet… nothing. No one started suspiciously keeping their curtains or blinds closed when they hadn’t before. Since they’re all too dumb to figure out that their lives are her parade, she just popped the popcorn and settled in for the show.

Tonight, however, Johanna is in no mood for the show. After a late night shift ending a bitch of a week, all she’s in the mood to do is swim a few laps to get the grime off of her skin then lay back in one of the lounge chairs around the pool, listening to the hum of the air conditioners in the sweltering Carolina night, swatting at the mosquitos because she’s too damn lazy to light the citronella torches, and stare up at the rectangle of starry sky she can see.

It’s quiet tonight. She swims her laps, and it works wonders to relax her tired bones and even more tired soul. After, she lays out on one of the squeaky lounge chairs. The hum and the warm air make her drowsy. Inevitably, she begins to doze, with only a vague awareness of the passage of time and the sounds around her.

It’s the loud click and the whoosh that wakes her. Just for a moment. Not long enough to place it at all before she fades back out into half slumber.

Her psyche is a bitch tonight, dropping long breathy moans into her dreams. The sex so good you can’t quite keep it in kind of moans, even though you’re trying. Completely aware that she messed up a truly great thing just days ago, she tells her subconcious to fuck off and stop reminding her of the one she let get away. Because she was stubborn. Unfortunately, her subconscious is not listening to her. Stupid fucker.

Scrunching up her nose, she refuses to move. She’s sticky with sweat and pretty sure that she’ll lose two layers of skin off her back and thighs when she goes to stand up from the lounge. Besides, there’s a low moaning noise that makes her wonder if maybe she wasn’t actually dreaming those sex sounds.

The moans in her mind grow louder and slightly more frantic until she can place the heavy feeling in her limbs. She’s awake after too little sleep.

Damn it. She’s not actually dreaming this shit. Which means one of her neighbors is on the brink of a seriously great orgasm. She’s not sure if she’s annoyed by the fact that she herself hasn’t had decent sex in far too long, or if she’s amused at yet another dramatic chapter in life at Victor’s Square.

The real question is… who’s doing the nasty tonight?

Act 2

A slight shiver and a thrill goes through Johanna as she finally opens her eyes and stares up at the canvas of stars above her.

Another moan ends in a slight squeal and fuck it, Johanna is hooked on the mystery. Shame she doesn’t have any popcorn down here, because given the sheer volume, and the way the sounds are magnified by the shape of the rectangle around the pool, she’s pretty sure whoever it is, they’re fucking with the windows open.

Kinky.

And a lot more interesting than her job. She does a happy little shimmy and settles in to guess who it possibly could be. First things first… she glances around the pool and discovers to her dismay that every apartment has at least one window open, but they’re all dark. Not surprising given that it’s well past midnight. But it’s unfortunately unhelpful. The air conditioner must be out again. That’s probably what that loud noise was earlier.

She closes her eyes again, hoping to pinpoint the direction of the sounds to figure out which of her neighbors is getting lucky tonight. But the shape of the building makes it impossible. Sounds just carry weird in this rectangular bullhorn. They could be coming from anywhere.

“Ung, yeah, right there… oh-oooooh!” The last sound is hitched and breathy. That’s a woman’s voice, Johanna thinks.

“Yes. Don’t — don’t stop! – I –” The word is pinched off in a desperate sort of ecstasy and Johanna smiles. This could be fun.

It can’t be Caesar and Claudius, the two radio talk show hosts who live in apartment 6. They’re gay. And men. And a couple. But truthfully, she’s not at all disappointed that she can rule them out. She already knows more than she’d like to admit about their sexual habits. Usually she’s not one to kink shame, but electrodes on nipples is a little too close to the realm of torture for her tastes.

“Yes! Please!” the woman begs and Johanna feels her body flush with the erotic sounds, she’s half aroused but fully invested in figuring out who this is. She could of course, get up and walk around to triangulate the sound, but what’s the fun in that?

She quickly rules out Mags in apartment 5. She’s the sweetest old lady, surprisingly spritely. From what Johanna has seen from old pictures of her, Mags was a fucking dish in her youth, but now she’s gotta be pushing ninety. Besides the wrinkles (shudder), Johanna would be worried about heart failure if Mags were the one getting her boots knocked around with this much vigor.

The long moans shift to the choppy, catch breath ones that mean she’s close, whoever the lucky bitch is.

Cinna in apartment 3 is out. He’s ace. Asexual and aromantic. Claims that he’s in a love affair with his work. Well if she could design clothes like the ones Cinna does, Johanna would be willing to give up sex too. She snorts a little and turns her ear, hoping for a better angle on the sound. She’s pretty sure it’s coming from one of the upstairs apartments, but can’t be sure.

Whoever it is, she lets fly a single high pitched note. And then a long stuttering moan that just sounds exactly how it feels to come back down from a really good orgasm. Satisfied, relieved, a little sleepy and a whole lotta euphoric.

Lucky bitch, Johanna thinks again. Her legs feel heavy and her toes tingle in empathy.

Now if only she could catch something of the partner’s noises…unless the woman is masturbating. Possible, but the directions to not stop earlier make it less likely.

A low pitched murmur and a deep masculine laugh helpfully nix that thought almost as soon as Johanna has it.

Not flying solo, but also Johanna can now rule out Enobaria and Lyme from apartment 2. She’s never understood them exactly. On the surface, you’d think they’d be perfect for one another. Their personalities mesh in a weird kinda way. Enobaria is louder while Lyme is more dignified, but they’re so often bickering about politics… and the truth is, they have an open relationship.

Or at least Johanna assumes they do based on the number of not-Lyme women Enobaria has entertained shoved up against the glass door leading to their balcony…but if not, Johanna is perfectly willing to offer up herself as a rebound to Lyme when the inevitable shit hits the fan. That woman is built like a house and fucking sexy in a domineering sort of way. Like Brienne of Tarth hotness.

She can order me to submit anytime she wants, Johanna thinks with a smirk.

As if confirming her thoughts, a long deep moan drifts down to her ears, slow and almost silky. Delighted and yet a little astonished, like he can’t quite believe his luck. Definitely a dude. Blowjob or penetration? Either way, this guy’s pent up, she thinks. She’s also guessing that the girl’s orgasm was from fingering or cunnilingus, which means the show is not anywhere near to being done.

There’s only so many people left who it could be…

Her phone vibrates on her chest and she finally opens her eyes again, lifting it above her face and squinting at the overly bright screen.

Finnick: I can’t believe you’re sleeping on this. Do you hear this?!

Johanna frowns. The time stamp is right now. Which rules out Finnick and Annie in apartment 4. Damn it. They were the most obvious choice for a man-woman pairing going at it with this much abandon, and while Johanna is pretty sure they have mind numbingly, porn worthy good sex, they’re unfortunately discreet about it.

It’s maddening.

Whenever she talks about Finnick and Annie, Johanna’s therapist always hums that way therapists sometimes do when they know you’re engaging in something destructive or unhealthy — such as a minor obsession with your best friend’s love and sex life — but the therapist wants you to figure it out on your own. Johanna can’t help it. Finnick’s a walking sexual fantasy for almost every woman out there. Even her lesbian friends find him hot. And Annie’s gorgeous. Johanna can’t help it if she not so secretly wants them to sandwich her. She’s got a good strap on that Annie could borrow to get it done.

But alas, or maybe fortunately, Finnick’s text eliminates them as the current lucky couple. Pity. She was hoping for something new to add to her spank bank.

Johanna: Where are you?

Finnick: Well we were asleep.

Johanna: Boring. You could be giving them competition.

As if to punctuate her point, a steady cadence of low, slow moans begins filling the air. They weave through the humidity and now Johanna is just angry.

Johanna: Do you know who it is?

Finnick: Nope. I have my theories…

Johanna: Ugh spare me.

There’s three potential couples left, and of those three, Johanna’s got a good guess who Finnick thinks it is, or at least wants it to be.

Johanna: I’ll gouge out my eyes if it’s them.

Finnick: Say it. Call them the name.

Johanna: I’m not using that stupid nickname, you absolute child

Finnick: Like you’re any better.

“Fuck fuck fuck, stop. You’re gonna make me come,” the lucky man gasps. The woman must say something because he chuckles and whispers back to her, the tone traveling if not the words. Johanna sets her phone down then, perked up by shuffling noises that sound maybe like a position change.

So who is left…

There’s Haymitch and Effie. Those two… residents of apartments 9 and 11 respectively…they pretend like they hate one another, and maybe they really do. While Johanna enjoys their epic fights, she’s not overly fond of their making up sessions. She’s pretty sure Effie was some kind of tantric goddess or pretzel in another life with the way that woman can bend.

It’s…unnatural.

Her phone vibrates again and Johanna lifts it in front of her face, this time it’s a notification from Facebook, sent out to all the residents in the group.

Effie: I have already filed a complaint with Mr. Heavensbee in regards to the broken a/c. He says there will be a repairman here first thing in the morning. In the meantime, we should all attempt to be cordial in our behaviors and not disturb the other residents since all will likely have the windows open for the night.

A text almost immediately after let’s Johanna know what her friend thinks of that.

Finnick: Where’s your sense of fun, Effie?

Johanna bites back a snort. Although the notice does rule out the exuberant woman as a candidate for Porn Queen tonight, so Johanna texts Finnick again.

Johanna: My money is on Cashmere and Gloss

Johanna sends the text and waits for the response. She’s not disappointed. She cackles internally at the flood of barf emojis and angry exclamations she gets back. Cashmere and Gloss of apartment 1, or as Johanna likes to call them, The Lannisters. Because they may be brother and sister, but they’re totally doing the nasty. Really nasty.

No one believes Johanna about this, though, and she’s not about to tell the other residents how she knows it’s a fact, not just some cockamamy theory of hers. People get pushed off walls for things like that.

Not to mention then they’d all figure out that she can see into their apartments as well and there goes that bit of fun.

“Fuck,” the lucky dude draws the word out into almost a croak, and there’s a soft sigh from her.

Finnick: Something is wrong with you

Johanna: Do you think he’s well hung? Whoever he is?

Finnick: Who cares as long as he knows how to use it?

Johanna shakes her head at this, easily able to picture her friend wiggling his eyebrows.

Johanna: He sounds well hung. It could still be Haymitch, sans Effie

After all, Haymitch isn’t officially tied down, and at the last residence brunch, Peeta’s good friend Delly was visiting and wasn’t at all subtle about her attraction to Haymitch. The girl was deceptively sweet, bubbly and innocent, but with those knockers on her chest and the way she kept laughing at Haymitch’s worst jokes, Johanna is pretty sure Delly has a thing for the much older man.

Finnick: I’m going to ignore your obsession with Haymitch’s junk for now. And also nope. Annie says she can see Haymitch through our window, sitting on his balcony, drinking.

Finnick: Alone.

Well damn. There goes that theory. Just to be sure, Johanna turns her head and cranes her neck. Sure enough, Haymitch sits on his balcony, lounged back in his chair with a glass in hand. After a second or two, he must feel eyes on him because he looks down towards Johanna and lifts the glass in toast.

Which is when the wall pounding begins and the lucky man’s moans start to grow out of control. Damn. They’re really into it now.

Finnick: You know I’m right

Johanna: You’re ridiculous.

Finnick: It’s Peeniss. How much you wanna bet?

Johanna rolls her eyes and shakes her head. Finnick has some crazy theory that Peeta Mellark, baker and all around way too nice guy of apartment 8 is somehow secretly dating Katniss-I-Will-Shoot-You-If-You-Touch-Me-Everdeen of apartment 12. Not that the girl doesn’t need a good fuck. If anyone is desperately in need of a body shaking, mind blowing, toe curling orgasm, like the one currently building in the summer night, it’s that perpetually scowling and uptight bitch.

Johanna just seriously doubts that the woman now moaning in cadence with the steady headboard thumps and the increasing volume is Katniss. She sounds way too into it, relaxed. Whoever she is, she’s getting nailed five ways to Sunday and is ecstatic about it.

It could be one of Katniss’ lovely roommates. Katniss lives with her younger sister and one of her best friends, Madge Undersee, in apartment 12. They’re crammed into it somehow… but before Johanna can suggest it to Finnick, she dismisses the idea.

Prim’s at college, left three days ago…so it won’t be her. Shame. She’s been living under her big sister’s overprotective arch so long that the poor girl has got some catching up to do in the sex arena. College will be good for that, but it means she’s not the woman–

“Fuck yeah.” A resounding slap and the accompanying whimper make Johanna’s eyes go wide. “Lift that ass for me. Fuck yourself on my cock. Love it when you do that.”

Whoa. Okay.

It could be Madge. Or Gale who lives right next door in apartment 13, but they’re almost as unlikely candidates as Katniss. Johanna is pretty sure Madge is a lesbian. Closeted still, unfortunately, because Johanna wouldn’t mind burying her face between those creamy thighs. And Gale… well it could be Gale, Johanna supposes, with some lucky girl who doesn’t live in Victor’s Square.

Maybe Delly.

Shame it’s not me, Johanna thinks and risks stretching a little. It has been her before, in her own apartment, because while Gale is usually down to fuck, he’s never down to doing it in his apartment.

That’s because he’s got a massive boner for Katniss and isn’t willing to risk her knowing that he fucks around with at least half a dozen girls that are not Katniss. Masochist. That’s what Gale is. But it’s also why Johanna doubts that Gale is the guy currently balls deep in ecstasy. He’s too loud for someone who wants to keep his sex life secret from his neighbor.

As for Peeta…well it could be Peeta with a girl who isn’t Katniss. He’s handsome and sweet enough to get plenty of pussy, if he tried—

“No! Don’t stop!”

“You don’t get to come again just yet,” the man growls and Johanna automatically clenches her thighs at the commanding tone.

More shuffling and grunting. One yelp from her, then the pounding resumes. And doesn’t let up.

“Harder!”

Faster and faster, his moans keeping pace. The resounding slapping of skin.

“Gonna – gonna!”

A chorus of “yes’s” and desperate pleas.

“Fucking yes! Peeta!”

Her phone goes off with a stupid amount of speed.

Finnick: I TOLD YOU!!!!

Johanna types madly at this.

Johanna: So it’s not the Lannisters, but that doesn’t mean it’s Katniss up there with Peeta.

Finnick: Oh come on! Who else could it be? You know he’s got it bad for her!

Okay yeah, there is that. There’s also the fact that Johanna shouldn’t be so bitter about this. Just like Katniss is in dire need of a good fuck, so is Peeta. But based on the sounds and the things they said…

Whoever she is, she’s still squealing and the thumping hasn’t let up yet. Damn that’s a long orgasm, Johanna thinks with more than a little jealousy.

“Come for me. Fucking come inside me. Now. Peeta!”

Those aren’t the words of a sexually frustrated prude talking, Johanna wants to say. Nor are they words of a couple going at it for the first time. Nope. This couple is way too comfortable with each other for it to be a first time. This couple has fucked before. Maybe often.

Go baker boy, Johanna wants to say, but she can’t imagine who he’s with. He hasn’t so much as brought a date home in a year.

A series of texts from Finnick crop up on her phone. Flame emojis and winking faces. An eggplant or two and the three drops of water people use to represent cum. Johanna slouches in her chair, a little miffed that she can’t shut Finnick up yet until…

There’s a deep growling, animalistic sound. A long string of curse words mixed with moans and then—

“Katniss. Fuuuuuuuuck.”

The curse word takes him about a minute to get out all the way. Damn it, Johanna thinks. Now Finnick will be impossible to live with. She can’t even look at her phone as it blows up again, knowing that he’ll be gloating. Instead she turns it off.

As carefully as she can, Johanna peels herself off the lounge chair and tiptoes towards the stairs, intent on reaching her own balcony. Not because it sits caddy corner to Peeta’s apartment and if they’re in his room, it’ll be easier for her to hear any pillow talk. Not at all.

She hurries and nearly gives herself away with the door, but manages it. She stands in the shadows of her balcony and nearly chokes on her tongue at the first thing she hears, besides the unmistakable sounds of coming down thrusts or sucks, maybe kissing, quiet aftermath moans.

“Hold still. I’m not done.”

“Feels too good,” he pants. “Can’t take much more, Katniss.”

“Mmm, you’ll take it and you’ll like it.”

“Yeah, I will,” he says and she giggles.

“Are you braiding my hair?”

“Can’t help it. You look so gorgeous sucking yourself off my dick… I can stop…”

“No… go ahead.”

Another few seconds of suction noises and then Peeta sighs in relief.

There’s the fwump and creak of a bed under weight. Johanna can practically see them all cuddled up like a cute little couple in his bed. Sighing and kissing and caressing in their afterglow.

Disgusting.

“Such a cute ass, and all mine,” Katniss says and there’s a slap then a gasp.

Fucking hell, Johanna thinks, eyes bulging out of her head.

Who would’ve thought the two of them would be so wild in bed? Who would’ve thought they were actually fucking each other?

Johanna wrinkles her nose then, finally forcing herself to go inside her own place. Just out of curiosity, though, she chances one last peek at Peeta’s place. The curtains are drawn, but a helpful gust sucks them out the window just long enough for Johanna to catch a glimpse of two naked bodies on his bed, illuminated in the soft glow of a lamp. Katniss with her head tipped over the edge in the direction of the window and a smile on her face as Peeta kisses a lazy path over her body. Her fingers plucking absently at the tangled sheets.

Well damn and fuck.

Johanna heads to bed after that and prepares a salvo of taunting for tomorrow morning. There’s no way she’s letting something this juicy go unremarked upon, especially since literally everyone who was home would’ve heard it.

Act 3

In the morning, Johanna is up early and down at the community center well before the once a month residents’ brunch that Effie insists on hosting. Poor thing is pinch faced and pale this morning, flummoxed when Johanna offers to help set up.

“I suppose. Since no one else appears to be out and about yet. Nothing funny with the vegetables this time,” Effie chastises and Johanna salutes. She’s got better things planned than erotic displays with the produce.

Honestly, she couldn’t care less about the flower arrangements or the energy inherent in the order of food laid out on the table. Helping Effie this morning affords her a prime view through the community center windows of each stairwell and of everyone arriving this morning.

And not just for brunch, she thinks with a smirk as she spots Gale, still wearing his work shirt, sneaking up a stairwell towards apartment 13.

Where have you been all night? Johanna wonders. Not with Katniss, the girl he’s so obviously got the hots for. Even better for the impending drama. She wonders if he’ll find his neighbors present or if Katniss is still cozied up with Peeta in post coital bliss. They’re probably totally morning sex people, Johanna decides.

Slow, sweet morning sex with loving words. Ugh, gag me, Johanna rolls her eyes at her own thoughts.

Preparations move swiftly after that, even with Effie on her case every few minutes. The pending drama is just too great to dampen her mood.

Peeta’s one of the first to arrive, conspicuously alone. He chats with Johanna for a few minutes, friendly as always, and then moves off as more of the residents arrive.

It takes everything in Johanna’s energy reserve to not throw something at the back of his head. He acts like he didn’t have the fuck of his life last night. It befuddles her and also infuriates her because it means Finnick could be right.

Oh my god, Finnick could be right about them! They might actually be dating. Who’s to say they aren’t if they can keep their sex life together such a secret. If the air conditioner hadn’t failed…

Peeta’s nonchalance this morning throws all her arguments against Finnick’s stupid Peeniss theories out the window. How is that even possible? She had Peeta pegged as a total softie. Hand holding, nose rubbing, and obnoxiously cute, borderline clingy PDA type of guy, not a rail you into the bed then pretend I don’t even know you the next morning type of guy.

Huh. Pegging. Wonder if he’s into that, Johanna thinks then has to forcibly shake the image out of her head. Because not only does it make sense in a way, but the image is also…sexy as fuck. And she doesn’t need yet another happy dappy ass couple to fantasize about and maker her therapist hum at her in that knowing way.

Fuck Finnick and his stupid theories.

When the tenants of apartments 12 and 13 finally arrive together, Madge splits off to talk to Mags. Gale and Katniss are both suspiciously wet haired. If Johanna didn’t know any better, she’d guess that they were the culprits last night, especially when Katniss doesn’t even so much as look in Peeta’s direction.

Her cheeks are flushed, but she’s avoiding her fuck buddy, talking to literally everyone else, twisting the damp ends of her braid around her finger.

“What do you make of it?” Johanna asks Finnick, bumping her hip into his. He shrugs, with that insufferable smirk on his face that he always gets whenever he’s right.

For two people who were so clearly intimate last night, Katniss and Peeta are doing a pretty good job of acting like the other one doesn’t even exist.

“They’re just… both very private people. But the signs are all there for anyone paying attention.”

“But that’s the thing… the signs aren’t there!” Johanna protests. What game are they playing, she wonders.

“I just don’t get it,” Johanna says and Finnick glances down at her.

“What?”

She waves her hands at Peeta, who looks for all the world like he’s fascinated by whatever Caesar is talking about. But why would he be when Katniss is literally right there.

“They act like nothing happened.”

“Well we know something happened,” Finnick says conspiratorially. Then his smile slips. “Actually, everyone here knows about it.”

“Huh?”

“Yeah. Apparently everyone was home last night…”

“Not Gale,” Johanna adds and lifts one eyebrow. Finnick’s eyes go wide and his mouth turns round.

“Oh my. Delicious.”

“Isn’t it?”Johanna says. “But still… you wouldn’t guess it from the way they act.”

“They can’t stop looking at each other.”

Johanna turns her head and motions at them. Absolutely not looking at one another.

“Are not.”

“You missed it. Gotta be quick with these two.”

Johanna shakes her head as she watches Katniss, and Gale who is placing some kind of food on her plate. She’s nodding and listening to him but subtly shifting the food off to the side of her plate while picking up something else and nibbling on it straight away.

And finally, Johanna can’t take it anymore. She stomps over to the tables and loads up her own plate, absolutely not eavesdropping on their conversation.

“Thought you were gonna text me when you got off work?” Gale says.

“Oh. Something came up… Prim. Prim needed to talk.”

“Everything alright?” Gale asks.

And this time, Johanna just catches the quick dart of gray eyes towards blue. Peeta’s shy smile. Katniss’ swift flutter of lashes and nibble on her bottom lip before returning her attention to Gale.

“It is now.”

“Usually is after a seriously good orgasm or two. And by the way, that’s low, using your baby sister as an excuse,” Johanna snorts. She doesn’t mean to, but it just sort of slips out.

Katniss whips around to face her. Dark rouge staining her high cheekbones and her lips pinched together.

“My sister isn’t an excuse.”

“Oh please. Cut the crap.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Katniss hisses.

“I’m talking about the fact that we never see the two of you so much as kiss or even hold hands in public, but last night, I heard you having sex. Loud sex. Phenomenal, shake the rafters loud, sex.” Johanna smirks at the pair of stunned faces looking at her. And the dozen curious faces plus Peeta’s mortified one. All of them focused on her. Center stage, she thinks with a grin and waves a half eaten croissant around at the gathered crowd. “We all heard you. Except for Gale here who was probably out getting consolation tail since you didn’t text him. Really, Brainless, what do you expect if you and baker boy are gonna bang with the windows open?”

There’s ten seconds of stunned silence before Finnick shouts, “I figured it out first, by the way!” Then he grunts as Annie elbows him in the gut.

“Baker boy?” Gale practically growls and Johanna sashays away as Peeta steps over to stand behind a now scowling Katniss. Her hand clenches into a fist as she faces Gale. She leans back against Peeta’s chest, as if she knows he’s there before she even sees him. Good for her. At least she’s not going to shy away from it. But now they’re going to be every bit as insufferably disgusting as Finnick and Annie are.

Love’s a bitch, oh well. Time for that popcorn, Johanna thinks.

#Springtime Edition 2020 #katnissdoesnotfollowback #buttercupbadass #Prompt 31 #early submission #submission

193 notes · View notes

scoundrels-in-love · 4 years ago

Note

hiraeth for the meme? JB?

Anon, you did what I thought was impossible, as in, made me write again. Thank you for picking one of my most beloved words of longing, ever.

Hiraeth: a homesickness for a home to which you cannot return, a home which maybe never was; the nostalgia, the yearning, the grief for the lost places of your past.

Also on AO3. Just excuse to write emotional introspection & landscape porn.

---

Jaime hadn’t been shipwrecked and cast onto Tarth's shores, but he might as well have been, with the odd sense of wonder that fills him as he cranes his neck to peer at the cliff faces that give little way to a rocky beach, as if pebble by pebble Tarth has reclaimed land from sea's unending touch, with sheer determination, like its people create houses and turn them into homes upon the rock.

A castaway might feel fear and longing for their home once the marvel of feeling land beneath their feet wanes, but instead, Jaime feels as if he's been castaway his whole life and finally arrived at the gates of his home. The great, sharp gates that lead onto a steep and sometimes narrow path toward the clifftop that he has walked through a hundred times and still feels humbled and welcomed by.

He climbs slowly, because he has nowhere to be right now, other than this moment and this familiar journey upward. And yet, it is still opposite of the aimless days and months he has known before Tarth. Being here is being , in a way that aches as much as it soothes, from the early morning sun carving its way through the clouds as he works the land to golden, wind swirled evenings spent on docks or in Davos' inn or the longing that's on cusp of being fulfilled, but all the more aching for that, that fills him when he is here.

Finally, he reaches the top, hauls his gaze over the even page of clifftop, though its edges are greatly torn and moves toward one of the further ledges, leaning directly over the sea in a far reach. He would call it desperate, but what can a cliff be desperate for, when it holds its opposite in gentle grasp?

From up here, he sees the port and the town to the North with its beach line that he had followed to the base of these cliffs, deeper inland where the Evenfall Hall lays with the villages that have scattered around it, like crumbs of its marble walls sprouting seeds of homes. He knows the little paths connecting them, can spy his own house and plot of land that will bear his feeble farming attempts this year. It’s not the view he needs, right now.

He looks ahead, instead. To the vanishing line of the horizon where the gray of the sky and sea reach to mingle together, though the grey veil fails to imitate the shifting waves below, try as it might. And it does try , shedding streaks of grays from misty white to muted storm almost-black that take up the rest of the sky, gradually toward the meeting point.

The wind tears at his clothes, bites through the unbuttoned shirt collar like a jealous lover -- no, it does not deserve the comparison. And though the thought is fleeting, he already feels his sense of peace wobbling to the side, like a pile of pebbles built to make wishes with he's seen children build on the beaches.

It's odd, how being almost happy can ache. At least Jaime thinks he is almost that. Happiness is a ghost he has only heard of, sees its blurry outline when he recalls how laughter gilded faces of his mother and sister. It's a grief, maybe, that echoes hurt, for time taking the feeling of happiness with careless hand and even more so for all the laughter that died with his mother that could've spun toward the sky, the way he imagines he could've loved Casterly Rock then, the way he might've belonged.

Being here, makes him all the more aware of it, like a gap between something trembling and warm (he thinks about how a week ago, he had ended up helping Old Jenny when her cow had twins and the sticky, slightly bloody warmth that had imprinted into his hands) in him and the emptiness so large it almost feels like a thing has been drawn all the more sharply, marking the width newborn, wobbly thing must cross before it could even brush up against the void in him, risking being snuffed out. But maybe just that it exists before it dies, is enough.

He knows death like every other soldier does, but here on Tarth he's been learning of birth, too, (of calves and gardens, and dreams) and it scares him, some, with the inevitability it brings into the world. Jaime's never been good with constants - maybe because they've never been that, not to him. Not his mother, not even his twin's love and the sense of belonging she had weaved for him like a home of golden spider web (still clinging to his clothes in places he can't reach to brush them off), not honor or justice.

Only the search has remained.

Because it's never been wanderlust that chased him from city to port and across the sea and back again, though there had been a thrill in seeing new places and exploring every nook and cranny he could. Thrill and eventual disappointment, resignation even - no, not here either. Though he has hardly ever known what he's been searching for. Is, still. Because even now, here, where every step feels familiar and soothing like the sea's back and forth that he has always sought out since childhood, something is missing.

Jaime is content, though, more than ever and he is thinking of what he hasn't in over a decade: stopping. Staying. The thought had shot through his mind before a few times across the world, like a bird speeding across the imprint of sun in the sky, but it had never circled back, never sat down and never made a friend of him. Now, it's grown as familiar as his own worn-in work boots.

He has things here that he couldn't even imagine before, like the sense of marvel at how much the great oak tree has grown (since the last time, since the last time that never was) when he wandered up to Evenfall hall for the first time or the cutting clarity of things he cannot find words for when he's up in the cliffs, and things he never thought he even wanted, like people who smile and greet him, a cat that mills evenings into nights, and even a house that's one something short of home. (Just one, when it's never been anything less than an eternal list of indefinable.)

It used to make him angry, the way he knows homesickness as well as his own heartbeat, without ever knowing what it’s like to be at home, at peace. What kind of wretched thing runs in his blood that doesn’t know rest? What kind of love or hate chases him onward without direction, only with a want that he shouldn’t know, if he doesn’t know what the shape of what he’s missing? But the fall storms and quiet months of winter on Tarth have subdued the anger, drawn outlines in the sand that are almost an answer.

The sun breaks through the clouds then, pouring like rain in rare, bright streams onto the sea and he inhales deeply, as if he could take the light in him to dispel the smothering at the edges of his emptiness. And that's when he hears steps behind him. He half turns to see who it is, expecting one of the children though they're told not to play up here, but instead he falls - no, is pierced by, no, falls - into eyes impossibly familiar, when he knows he's never seen a blue like this, not even in his dreams that often spin blue and gold and gray across his heart.

But he knows them still, somehow, and if colors had sounds then this would have the soft bell of the final piece falling in place, of first notes of welcome home hymn, of relief's sigh - oh. Oh , it's you. You're here. (I've been waiting for you.)

Jaime draws a shuddering breath, tries to ground himself in taking in the rest of the person that makes him want to run away and toward them all at once.

It's a woman, taller than him he gauges even with the distance between them, and broader, too, with features arranged just shy of wrong, but not shy enough for most to not call her ugly, he guesses. (But he can't, because factuality doesn't stand a chance against the gale so high up.)

There's scowl on her face, maybe from the sun or the wind though he feels it's not, and wind has untangled pale strands from her braid to whip into her face and tug along in its rush. Freckles dot her face and for a moment, he believes he could find well-loved patterns in those and the rest, hidden by her dark blue coat and the slightly wrinkled shirt seen beneath the blue and gold brocade vest.

Jaime swallows and looks into her eyes again, trying to remember what is the image of the puzzle that feels complete now, but it's been locked away already. He finds that he doesn't care, he's just happy, because not seeing it doesn't change the truth of it. Just yesterday, he had planted apple trees in his garden and the promise of the pale pink blooms against bowed branches that always seem to remember the weight of all the fruit they will ever bear, alone had been enough to make his step light all the way to this moment.

So he smiles at her.

"Lady Brienne Tarth, I presume."

#Jaime x Brienne #Braime #rainy writes stuff #my fic #Anonymous #sent on a cloud #rainy rambles #absolutely shameless use of the italicized oh #and just wow i wrote... still cant believe

18 notes · View notes

a-libra-writes · 4 years ago

Text

Game of Thrones - Love Letter and Handwriting Headcanons

In this preference, you'll be writing to: Ned Stark, Robb Stark, Sansa Stark, Jon Snow, Benjen Stark, Jory Cassel, Eddison Tollett, Yara Greyjoy, Daenerys Targaryen, Jorah Mormont, Missandei, Grey Worm, Tywin Lannister, Tyrion Lannister, Jaime Lannister, Sandor Clegane, Bronn, Petyr Baelish, Stannis Baratheon, Davos Seaworth, Margaery Tyrell, Brynden Tully, Edmure Tully, Brienne of Tarth, Ramsay Bolton, Roose Bolton, Oberyn Martell, Arianne Martell

my own silly fanfic made me think of this bc there’s letter writing later on in that. whee!

Ned Stark

His handwriting is neat, evenly spaced and fairly plain. It’s easily readable, which is the point - he knows not everyone is well-versed in letters and he tries to make it easier. Ned typical sends ravens, only writing a full letter for when he has to give instructions or relay something important. He has a formal Stark wax seal for this… and yes, he uses that same formal seal when he sends something to you. The more you exchange letters, the more relaxed he clearly becomes in writing. He knows he isn’t romantic or poetic by any means, but he hopes his affection for you comes across.

Robb Stark

Goodness knows he’s had endless lessons on writing properly and expressing the right words, but Robb just has no interest in it. His handwriting is perfectly legible but obviously hastily written, and he doesn’t care if there’s a few smudges or the paper gets dirty. When he’s writing to you, he’ll try to be neater… but sometimes he’s just got so much to say, and he’s so eager to send it, he doesn’t even notice the mess. Robb never thought he’d anticipate letters, especially romantic ones, but he loves receiving things from you. If you live far away, he feels the distance strongly and starts to rely on your letters to feel more connected to you.

Sansa Stark

As expected, her penmanship is pretty and neat. If she's in a good mood she'll add little flourishes here and there, but normally she's a bit embarrassed to do it. It feels childish to do that now. When she finds a nice stationary, she saves it until she writes to you. Her envelopes have the usual Stark direwolf with some wildflowers along the border. Honest and romantic words used to come easy to her, but now she’s more subdued. She’ll include pretty poetry she heard and wanted to share with you.

Jon Snow

His writing would be neater if he just slowed down, but he’s often in haste, especially once he becomes Lord Commander. He never cared about the proper penmanship or address because who would a bastard write to? Really, it’s lucky he was taught letters at all. He’d do his best to write neater for you, but the words keep escaping him - It’s hard enough to express how he feels in person, writing it isn’t any easier, no matter what Sam says. Jon always responds if you write to him, even if he’s blushing and feeling stupid the whole time.

Benjen Stark

He’s perfectly capable of writing neatly, but Benjen rarely bothers to. He jots down what he needs, though he at least has to make it legible - there’s only so many men that know their letters at the Wall, and Benjen has to keep his orders neat. When you pass him a secret letter, he’s grinning like a boy. He thinks it’s adorable that you went through the effort of finding supplies and writing something so sweet. He’ll ask to read it in front of you, but if you make him do it in secret, he’ll want to run and find you as soon as he’s done. He’d fold it up tight and keep it in a safe pouch tied to his belt.

Jory Cassel

His handwriting is pretty messy. Jory was never bothered by it until he had to write you something. Oh no. Wasn't there a proper way to address you? What if it was too personal, or too standoffish? Poor Jory overthinks his letters unless you two write with frequency. His handwriting won't get better, but he's more comfortable writing sweet things. He likes to keep his envelopes and papers plain so no one suspects anything, which is a good habit if you’re dating in secret, but a silly once if you’re married.

Eddison Tollett

He jokes it’s a small miracle that he knows his letters, poor as his family was. He likes to pretend he doesn’t, just so the higher ups on the Wall won’t give him extra duties like they did Sam. Reading never interested him, and he had no one to write to, so it’s just not something he thinks about. When you slip him a letter, he just stares at it dumbly for a minute. Once Edd has a chance to open it up, he’s a little taken aback. What… should he do? Should he talk to you? Respond to it? He’s never had such a nice gesture given to him, never had anyone write such nice things to him (has he even received a letter before??). So the next time to meet him, he still has a stupefied look on his face. And here he was thinking nothing on the Wall could surprise him anymore..

Yara Greyjoy

She was taught writing and reading by her nuncle - because the Gods know her father hardly bothered - so she actually has fond memories of both, even if she hardly does it. Yara would be very curious by anything you sent. Was something wrong? If it smelled of perfume or had a pretty stationary, she’d snort… but once she read the contents, she’d just grin and laugh. If the letter is more romantic, she finds it silly, but so like you. Very endearing. If it’s more saucy and risque, well … she’s going to read this in private and take her time.

Daenerys Targaryen

Her handwriting wasn’t as neat as it could’ve been, given her upbringing. It’s a point of embarrassment, so Dany practices pretty lettering and uses interesting inks she’s found around the markets. It’s a bit relaxing, though when she’s writing something official as Khaleesi and Queen, she makes sure it’s perfect. She’s pleasantly surprised when you write her something - has she ever actually received something this sweet before? She’ll write you back with a smile on her face, and she likes any chance to use that fancy Targaryen seal. Dany will still love to receive and send letters even if you both are staying in a palace together. It’s just one of many romantic gestures she thought she’d never enjoy.

Jorah Mormont

Jorah's handwriting is nice, but he usually writes in haste, so several letters end up smudged. He doesn't like to waste paper and start over. Jorah really can’t believe that you’d send him something romantic and sweet; he tries to hide his grin and blush, but he’ll wear it the whole time he’s reading. When he's writing something really sweet to you, it gets him flustered and happy, so whole words end up smudged. He doesn't notice the ink on his hand until he's already put the letter in the envelope. He keeps whatever you’ve sent him in a protective leather book so they can’t get damaged.

Missandei

She has lovely handwriting in many languages, as she was taught. The neatness of the lines and letters really is impressive. When she's writing something sweet to you, she pauses and struggles with the words for a while. Missandei always has the sweetest, most thoughtful letters - more sentimental than romantic. Her letters are punctuated with citrus smelling paper and a modestly decorated envelope.

Grey Worm

He’s only recently learned to read, and writing is still a struggle - he’d be very intimidated at the idea of writing something to you. When you give him something to read for practice, it takes Grey Worm a few minutes before he realizes it’s something you wrote. And it’s for him! And about him! He’s very happy but also very flustered. It takes him longer to get through it, but he can’t stop smiling all day once he’s done. He aspires to write something just as nice, once he’s practiced more. He’d keep your letters in a safe place, and wouldn’t want anyone else to see them.

Tywin Lannister

His penmanship is near perfect, which you expected. It’s always written in a stark black ink on fine, almost marbled paper that has an equally officially looking gold Lannister seal on the envelope. People whisper it’s liquid gold that seals it, but you know better. Tywin’s letters are for business only, so he doesn’t expect you to send him anything romantic… He wouldn’t know what to do with it, besides read it with some amusement and tuck it away for later. You might think he never read it, until he’ll tease you by quoting it weeks later.

Tyrion Lannister

His handwriting is elegant and flawless, as it was meant to be. When Tyrion’s tired he’ll smudge here and there, and depending on how important the letter is, he’ll start over entirely. When he receives your first letter, he’s surprised by the pretty stationary and envelope - this is for him? - and the contents are even better. Tyrion might have a small mental shutdown if you write him something romantic and kind. He’ll re-read it over and over and be distracted through much of the day. This is really for him? He has to respond, of course, and he’ll do it while his emotions are high. For once he doesn’t think on carefully crafted words, he writes what he feels and picks a more subtle stationary (no giant Lannister seals) so attention isn’t drawn to you.

Jaime Lannister

Gods, he hates writing. Just sitting down to write a report is bad enough, but when it's something important? When it's a response to something lovely you wrote? He struggles. The letters start moving around like they used to, he remembers those awful lessons with his father and he's just put off by the whole thing. Seeing you in person is far better. Jaime's handwriting is neat, because it had to be, though when he's upset he'll write a few letters backwards.

Sandor Clegane

It's a mess. Really, the fact his words are readable is a miracle. 'Chicken scratch' is a generous term, though his name is passable. If you wrote him a letter, he'd have no idea what to do with it, let alone how to respond. Sandor doesn't do sentiment like that; seeing you in person can be conflicting and confusing enough. He'd probably rip it up and burn it after drinking too much (and immediately regret that in the morning).

Bronn

He's barely literate, and not a man of flowery words anyway, so don't respect a response. If anything he'd hand the letter to Tyrion and ask him to read it - only for it to be handed back once Tyrion realized it was very personal and... revealing. Bronn doesn't worry about a response or consider you getting upset about it. If you are, he has ways to make up for it.

Petyr Baelish

You expected him to have neat penmanship, but you didn't expect it to be this nice. And of course, his way with words shows in his letters, but it's even better. You might even blush and have to excuse yourself to read it in private. Petyr loves to write on fancy paper with fancier envelopes that have his sigil, but if they're meant to be secret, the only indicator is a little symbol on the envelope's seal. He delights in anything you send him, especially if he can smell your perfume on it.

Stannis Baratheon

Stannis writes very neat letters with equally impossibly neat rows. He has a habit of gripping his quill too tight, but his letters are concise so his hand doesn’t hurt. While he usually writes quickly because he knows what to say, when he writes to you, he pauses far too often. Sometimes ink drips on the paper while he’s thinking, sometimes he misspells a word he’s never gotten wrong before. It takes a long time, especially if he’s responding to something that was very sweet and romantic. His first letters were very awkward and halting, but they’ve steadily improved. Mostly.

Davos Seaworth

You were the one who helped him with writing, after helping him read as well. Davos isn’t happy with his penmanship, but he didn’t think he’d make it this far, so he keeps trying when he has time. It’s messy but legible enough. Davos is always pleasantly surprised when you write to him; he loves that you took the time to send something so sweet. It’s hard for him to reply efficiently, or to put what he’s thinking into words, so sometimes he’ll wait for you to get back instead. He would use your letters to practice reading… but it gets him terribly flustered to read the same kind things over and over again.

Margaery Tyrell

She doesn't mind taking the extra time to make her letters extra beautiful, to press dried flower petals and put them in the envelope, to look through dozens of stationary to find one that's just right for her mood. For most people, they're lucky to get one of these little rituals - you get all of them. She'd be delighted if you took extra care in your letters, too, and naturally she keeps whatever you send her in a special box (that absolutely no one will find).

Brynden Tully

It's no surprise that his handwriting is simple and gets the job done. His brother used to complain that he wrote like a soldier, not a lord, and Brynden is proud of that. He won't wax poetic to you, but he will plainly state that he misses you and he always writes back promptly. Brynden feels bad that his letters take so long to arrive, so he'll make them longer with funny anecdotes and things he's heard from travellers. He folds his letter a few times and wraps it in a protective parchment, just in case rain comes or some idiot drops it.

Edmure Tully

He writes well enough, with neat letters that are jotted down in haste. Edmure almost never stays and lingers on words and sentences, he just writes what comes to mind and moves on. He’s shocked in a good way when you write something to him - you missed him that much? Enough to write all this? He re-reads it several times, and keeps whatever you send him after that. He’ll eagerly write back, and even if it’s silly and awkwardly worded, you can feel the love in every letter. His letters are often a bit crumpled and are plain except for the Tully seal.

Brienne of Tarth

It might surprise some that she has a lady's penmanship. It was never something Brienne had trouble learning, though she often accidentally broke the quill by holding too hard. Though she cherishes the kind things you send her (and she blushes terribly as she reads them), she struggles to send something in return. Her words fail her and she feels embarrassed for trying, but she does try. Seeing you in person is so much easier, though. She likes to keep your letters in a safe place and read them when she's feeling down.

Ramsay Bolton

The letters are messy, but legible enough. The real issue is all the stains on the paper, usually a combination of mud, blood or water. He has little care for the proper way to write or address others; Roose may have given him the bare minimum and not expected him to actually use it. Ramsay is very surprised and amused by anything you send him, though. He considers writing something back, but decides to wait or just go and see you directly. That’s far more fun.

Roose Bolton

His handwriting is functional and his words are to the point. There's nothing outstanding about the letter or its contents, save for a blood-red Bolton seal on the envelope. Roose rarely sends full letters, though; it's a quick Raven or nothing. Though he won't mind anything you send… he'll be very pleased with how personal they become, and he still won't send anything back right away, if he does at all. Better to keep you in anticipation.

Oberyn Martell

Oberyn has a stylish flourish to his letters that’s unique to him. If that didn’t give it away, the pretty gold ink or embellished envelope will. Often it has the spear as a seal, sometimes it’s some interesting and strange stamp he picked up from his travels. There’s always a slight scent to his letters, and you can’t always place it. The actual words themselves are often scandalous and teasing, though he’s sent plenty of heartfelt things, especially if you enjoy it. He’s no poet, but he’s honest and romantic. Oberyn much prefers to see you in person, but he likes to receive sweet things and re-read them.

Arianne Martell

Her handwriting is beautifully elegant, and she loves getting ahold of pretty colored inks and papers. Her letters straddle a fine line between romantic and a little scandalous, and she likes to use pet names, as if you both are writing in secret. Her envelopes have a pleasant smell, and the official Martell seal. If she wants her letter to be sent especially fast, she’ll take her father’s seal. She keeps anything you send her in a pretty, hand carved wooden box with a lock and key.

929 notes · View notes

ddagent · 5 years ago

Note

Oh hello I am 100% here to prompt ‘hearing each other’s thoughts’ or some version of that

Well, I am 1000% here to write a version of that! I hope you enjoy, Anon!

“Good morning, Ms Tarth,” greeted Jeyne at reception. “Good weekend?” Probably spent the whole weekend at home with her cat.

Brienne stiffened as she swiped her key card. “I don’t have a cat.”

Jeyne fumbled; a line forming across her brow. “I didn’t say—”

No, Brienne thought, you didn’t say anything. That was part of the problem. Somehow, Brienne could hear what Jeyne was thinking. Even what song the security guard was singing in his head. Brienne knew how bored the man with the blue tie was; knew all about the affair the woman in the pencil skirt was having. It was…deafening.

Pinching the bridge of her nose, Brienne raced through reception and headed for the stairs. She couldn’t stomach taking the lift up to the twenty-eighth floor.

Thankfully, no one else took the stairs, so Brienne was allowed some peace as she walked up to her office. She probably would have taken the stairs anyway, avoiding the stares and gossip at the egg-shaped lump atop her forehead. Brienne had made the mistake of trying to stop a woman outside her building from being mugged, and had been knocked to the kerb for her trouble. After a visit to the emergency room, Brienne had returned home only to discover she could hear people’s thoughts.

Not a pleasant experience, looking as she did.

Sighing, Brienne finally made it onto the twenty-eighth floor, and the law offices of Lannister, Baratheon, and Targaryen. They were the most feared law firm in King’s Landing – nay, Westeros itself – and getting a position there was a coup for any lawyer. Brienne had been recruited by one of the senior partners, Renly Baratheon. He had found her arguments spirited and well-researched, and her research skills were currently helping Renly win case after case in civil court.

He was also the first person to address her as she entered the office. “Brienne! What in the name of the Seven happened to your head?”

“It’s nothing really,” she said, stomach churning as Renly crossed the foyer and joined her by the entrance. Her pulse quickened as his fingers brushed her temple. “Just an accident outside my building.”

“You poor thing.” I hope this won’t stop her from doing that research I need for the Bolton case. Brienne swallowed. “Are you sure you should even be in?” With a head that thick, she should be fine.

“I—” Brienne resisted the urge to flinch, to pull away from Renly’s comforting touch; such a stark contrast to the thoughts inside his head. “I’ll be fine, Mister Baratheon.”

He smiled. “Please, Brienne, how many times do I have to tell you? It’s Renly.” That’s it, put on a little charm. “I’m actually really glad you’re here, Brienne. I have some important work for you.” You can do all the boring paperwork while Jason on five sucks me off in the toilets. “I can’t trust anyone else with this.” Because you’re pathetically in love with me, and stupid enough to agree to do all my work. “Can I count on you, Brienne?”

“I think I need to sit down.”

She pushed past Renly, staggering to her broom cupboard of an office. Once inside, she turned the blinds and locked the door. Fuck. It wasn’t as if she expected Renly to share her feelings. But for him to so blatantly use them for his own ends…Brienne sucked in a breath, closed her eyes, and tried to calm herself. Fuck. It wasn’t enough that the Gods had cursed her with a tall, broad frame and ugly features. They had now cursed her with the knowledge of all those around her.

Brienne wondered how many other people secretly found her wanting.

Suddenly, there were two raps at her door. She unlocked it, thrust it open, and came face-to-face with one of the paralegals, Podrick. “Sorry to disturb, Ms Tarth, but the staff meeting is just about to start.”

“Thank you, Podrick.”

“You’re welcome, Ms Tarth.” She said my name again. No one else knows my name. “Did you want some ice for your forehead? Maybe some painkillers? Or a coffee?”

Brienne shook her head, regretting the move instantly. “No, thank you. But…thank you, Podrick.”

It seemed not everyone found her lacking in some way. She patted Pod on the shoulder as she passed through her office door, and joined the other associates in making their way to the conference room. Renly stood at the head of the table, along with the other senior partner who worked at this branch, Jaime Lannister. Brienne had never cared for him: he was arrogant, slick, and the underhanded way he had ousted one of the firm’s own partners had been a disgrace to the legal profession. Her disrespect was mutual: he found her boring, an object of ridicule.

She took a seat far, far away from him.

“Good morning, everyone,” Lannister said, drawing the room to attention. “We have several high profile cases in the works and Mister Baratheon and I would like updates. Let’s start with Addam.”

As the senior associates went around the table and explained the status of their open cases, Brienne was bombarded by more thoughts than she could to process. Two colleagues were secretly dropping the ball; a pair of associates were fucking each other and charging clients for the time. In her head, Brienne began humming the first song she could think of to drown out the thoughts. She got through two verses of The Bear and the Maiden Fair before a voice called to her.

Gods, she really is the most singular woman. I could stare at her for hours.

Brienne lifted her head, recognising the voice. It seemed that Lannister was attracted to one of their colleagues; what a cliche. Was it Melara Hetherspoon, who handled the firm’s divorce cases? What about Pia, one of the paralegals? There were several beautiful women around the table; any one of them could have caught his eye. Brienne could care less about who a man like Jaime Lannister was attracted to.

Her eyes. They’re so blue. A man could drown happily in those eyes. Brienne shivered and looked across the table. Lannister immediately ducked his gaze to the paperwork in front of him. Fuck, did she catch me? Probably not. Tarth’s always looking at Renly anyway.

She never looks at me.

#anonymous #braime #jaime x brienne #brienne x jaime #mine: paragraph prompts #ship: braime #I just...I want to write all the stories #fic: telepathic brienne

287 notes · View notes

aliveanddrunkonsunlight · 4 years ago

Photo

my heart talks of nothing but you - 1920s fic

October, King’s Landing, 1920

Fall in the city has been unseasonably warm. At the train station, people bustle past, sweltering under the station’s glass roof like plants wilting in a conservatory. Jaime stands and waits for the 11:40 train from Sunspear. He is early, and the wait is long enough the heat gets to him, sweat beading under his collar, so he leans his cane against the brick wall behind him and takes off his jacket, laying it neatly across the handle of the luggage cart. Perhaps the Westerlands will provide the chill in the air he’s been craving, as they will be getting out of the city soon enough. He tugs down his waistcoat and, to further combat the heat, rolls up his sleeves. Several women departing from another train give him furtive glances as they pass by. Jaime nods politely to a few of them.

The train chugs into the station right on time, but the people stepping out from the cars blur together in his line of vision, as he is concentrated on spotting one blonde, tall head. Brienne. After months away, she looks different, but he cannot put his finger on what it is about her that has changed, and it hardly matters, for his heart clenches in his chest all the same.

She is dressed in a white shirt and wide-leg trousers. If her clothes did not already put her in contrast to the other women disembarking, her height would. His eyes fall to the long line of her legs and Jaime is so caught up in adoration, he almost overlooks her companion, a mustachioed man with black hair, dressed in a fine suit with a yellow waistcoat embroidered with suns. The man appears too flashy and debonair for Brienne to fall into casual acquaintance with on the train journey, so he assumes it is someone she knows from Dorne.

The pair have drawn closer to where he stands, but Brienne still has not noticed him, so he calls out, “Miss Tarth.” Her first semester of university, Jaime was the teacher’s assistant in her history lecture, and teased her by always using her title, despite her insistence to call her by her given name.

Her head snaps around at the sound of his voice, her face breaking into a smile when she realizes who it is. “Jaime!” she cries out in delight, suddenly in his arms. He laughs against her neck, tempted to lift her feet off the ground, but the familiar twinge in his leg cautions him against it. “What are you doing here? I thought I wasn’t seeing you until this evening.”

Tonight, the university’s history department is holding a small reception and Jaime asked her to accompany him.

“I thought you might be in want of a kind gentleman to assist you with your luggage.” She holds up a worn leather satchel that looks more suitable for a weekend excursion. Jaime gapes. “That’s all you took? I know the Dornish are quite progressive, but I assume you wore clothes.” Brienne studied archaeology and spent the past four months in Dorne on an excavation. One day, he has no doubt, she’ll be head of a museum somewhere.

“Jaime.” she says warningly, but her blue eyes sparkle with amusement. Brienne glances back and notices her companion from the train waiting. “Oh, I’m dreadfully sorry, Mr. Martell. What you must think of my manners.”

“It’s quite alright.” He passes off a suitcase, embossed with Brienne’s initials, to Jaime.

“Jaime, this is Mr. Oberyn Martell. He has expertise in art history, particularly ceramics, and was an unending font of knowledge during the dig. Mr. Martell, this is Captain Jaime Lannister, one of my friends from university.”

“Friends?” Martell’s eyebrows raise. “I thought perhaps professor.” Jaime chooses to ignore the slight on his age or appearance--perhaps both--and shakes the man’s hand.

“He will be one day,” Brienne interjects politely. Whenever she brags about his work to others, he wishes he was someone who blushed because it seems the only appropriate response to the way that hearing her speak about him makes him feel. “He’s starting his graduate studies in history.”

Martell’s sly but amused smile makes Jaime’s hackles rise, but he can hear his father’s voice in his ear reminding him of his manners. “A pleasure to make your acquaintance. Are you visiting someone in the city?”

“Friends, as you say.” His eyes dart between the two of them. “At the university.”

Neither expand on Martell’s meeting, but knowing Brienne, he expects it has to do with her noble view on stolen objects. During many of the past wars, art and other artifacts had been looted from other provinces or populations, such as the Dornish or various groups throughout Essos and ended up in museums in Westeros. She believes archaeologists and other historians have a duty to return these objects to the place of their origin. The first time Jaime had seen her go off on a spiel about it, he had been awed and delighted by the depth of her knowledge, her sound reasoning and argument, and her righteous indignation.

Outside of the station, they part ways with Martell. The man clasps Brienne’s hand in his own. “It has been an honor, Miss Tarth. You are more of a treasure than the ones you dig up.” Jaime has to prevent himself from rolling his eyes. “And you are more than welcome in Dorne anytime.” His silky smooth voice dips low and he drops his head, kissing her hand before rising, eyes lingering on Brienne a bit too long before he is gone in a flash of yellow.

“Was he that dramatic all summer?” he asks under his breath, earning an elbow in the ribs from Brienne. Her cheeks are flushed; he hopes from the heat and not because that onerous man had flattered her.

“Some might say you have a flair for the dramatic.” She turns to look at him, squinting against the sun, but the light makes her blonde eyelashes look quite pretty. “I am so tired of the sun,” Brienne sighs as he waves down a cab. “The only protection against it was to swathe myself in layers. I looked like some spirit haunting the dig.”

Jaime chuckles, opening the car door for her. As she takes his hand to step inside, he notices the top button of her blouse is undone, revealing a small taste of the pale skin underneath, delicately beaded with sweat. He swallows, shutting the door behind her and trying to rid himself of the image.

After giving the driver her address, he leans back against the seat. “But you enjoyed your time there? It was everything you imagined?”

Brienne smiles, almost to herself, before turning towards him. “It was. I’ll save my stories for this evening, though, otherwise you’ll be hearing me repeat them all night.”

Selfishly, he wants to hear them first because he’s missed her. “Did you get my postcards?” He had sent her a series of postcards he collected from various museums around the city, each featuring an object of some importance, and scratched out the names on the back so she would have to guess the object and museum.

“Yes.” Her whole face lights up, brighter than any summer sun, and she launches into a story about how she figured out a particularly tricky one.

“I am quite glad you’re back, darling girl.” Brienne scrunches up her nose a little at the name. He used to call her that, too. The first time he said it, he meant it as a comment about his age and experience in the world he had on her, but she had reacted to it with such irritation, he began using it to needle her. “The city wasn’t the same without you. It felt as if you’d been wrenched from my life.”

She rolls her eyes at him, but there’s a smile she can’t quite keep tucked away. “Like I said, dramatic.” Yet, she looks quite pleased.

#future unnamed 1920s fic #now it has a name #work in progress wednesday #fic: my heart talks of nothing but you #jaime x brienne

38 notes · View notes

ice-cream-nekogirl · 5 years ago

Text

Descent into Love (Kirishima Eijirou x Reader)

I thought I posted this a long time ago but... apparently not? Weird but... i’m gonna post this again!! Hehe... it’s perfect cuz it’s April Fools day.

And... consider THIS like a sequel to the original fic~: https://ice-cream-kitsunegirl.tumblr.com/post/183939426324/april-fools-and-a-red-jockstrap-kirishima-eijirou#notes

You’re a tsundere in this one again~ And... a bit of a meanie... it’s OKAY to have the reader be a meanie btw, we don’t always have to be nice XD I know I’m not that nice... I mean I’m pretty nice but I like to tease every now and then too haha...

Yes I referenced one of my favorite horror movies of all time but it’s a REALLY good movie! Genuinely scary lolol and yes the title is partially from the actual movie ‘The Descent’

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CSYg7Z1KS_I

BTW SORRY FOR ANY OOC-NESS!!

Featuring: Best Boy Kirishima!

Sigh

As you sat on the couch in the common room you rested your chin on your palm, sighing for the 10th time this afternoon. You were beyond bored. It was one of the few break-days and yet nothing interesting was happening, you stared at your classmates, some of them were just chatting, conversations about training, the cooler heroes or about how much stronger they had gotten. Although you only heard ‘blah blah blah’ every time one of them opened their mouths.

“Hey (Y/N)!” However, you heard one person, and just hearing his voice made you smile as you perked up from your palm with a rosey red blush blossoming on your face.

“Hee… oh Kirishima, hey there dude.” You greeted him, adoring the way he grinned at you with those shark-like teeth of his. Which you actually found really endearing, and when he began talking to you, you felt yourself getting lost in his eyes as his words trailed off as you got distracted by his cherry red orbs. They might have been red, but they were some of the prettiest, sweetest pairs of eyes you had ever seen. Kirishima was an enthusiastic and energetic guy, and yet he was so gentle too, each trait was only some of the million reasons why you loved him.

“You know Kirishima… now that I get a good look at you… I rather like your pointy teeth. I always have in fact…” You suddenly said, pointing right at his mouth as he blinked a bit and nervously grinned, feeling oddly flattered as a smidge of pink tinted his cheeks.

“Oh ya do huh? Thanks! I’ve always been a little unsure about em ya know? Not everyone finds sharp teeth very approachable.” He admitted, since despite his personality, some people have found him a little intimidating once they got a look at his teeth. However, you weren’t put off by his teeth at all. If anything, you found them cool.

“Yeah… I wish I had your teeth.” He started to blush at how much you were complimenting him, he’d never really heard this much positivity about his teeth before. “I mean, if a villain were to show up, I’d just bare those pointy things and growl at them. And when I REALLY have to play dirty, I’ll sink em into their jugulars and tear a piece of their flesh off!” You suddenly exclaimed with a slightly crazed look in your eye that made Kirishima perk up and flinch a bit, now feeling slightly dejected since you wanted teeth like his for such brutal reasons.

“Ha… you know I never even considered using my teeth as a weapon before.” He pondered, even though he wasn’t the type to play dirty at all. It wasn’t really something he considered ‘manly’, although he wouldn’t judge you for that, and in a strange way, he considered you fairly manly in your own way and he respected the hell out of you for that. Even if you kinda scared him sometimes.

“You should. If it were me, I’d go ‘Brienne of Tarth’ on a villains’ ass and tear their fucking ear off!” You added, giving Kirishima a very vivid idea of what you meant as he nervously smiled. You reminded him of Bakugou in many ways, except you were a little bit nicer and not so angry like he was.

“Wow (Y/N) I definitely never want to get on your bad side.” He said nicely, and that’s what you loved about Kirishima. He never judged you, always said something nice about you even though you were weird and just a little bit of a trouble-maker most of the time. And he never avoided your or pushed you away no matter how many times you would tease him.

“You could never get on my bad side Kiri…” You said in a softer tone, contrasting with your energetic one you used seconds ago as you blushed upon admitting that and when you saw Kirishima’s contagious smile as his blush deepened. “Awww…”

Why couldn’t this boy see that you absolutely adored him? You wondered. You were sure that the teasing and the jockstrap you gave him should have made him wonder or think that maybe you had a thing for him despite the way you played around with him. It made you pout a little bit because you really wanted to get closer to Kirishima, hug him, kiss him and hug him again til he couldn’t breathe. And maybe slap him a little bit after because he made you feel this way and it was eating you up like some sort of disgusting lovey-dovey parasite. Every time he smiled at you; you would melt a little bit every single time.

You were a human infected with this parasite people call ‘love’, it felt so gross yet so wonderful, he was so wonderful…

It was driving you mad!

But you were so mad for him…

How you hated it!

And how you loved him…

A part of you wished that this could all just be some movie, where Kirishima would be the right guy for you, and you would be the best friend and then he would fall in love with you in the end. The two of you be happily ever after or however those crappy rom-coms ended, but if it meant finally being with Kirishima you would gladly let that all happen and just be with him for the rest of your life with that lovey-dovey song playing at the end credits.

Damn you had it bad…

But at that moment it hit you. All this talk about pointy teeth combined with your raging flurry of feelings for Kirishima and thinking about movies gave you a brilliant and somewhat evil idea just to get your beloved redhead closer to you and to get back at him too for giving you this crush. A devious smile spreading across your lips that Kirishima didn’t seem to think much of. Poor sweet boy, you thought.

“Hey you know what we should do? We should watch a movie together. All together as a class.” You suddenly proposed, which kind of surprised him but just the thought of spending time with the whole class made him grin wide.

“All together? That actually WOULD be a great idea! Yeah… it’s been so busy lately, I think we could use the break. I’m up for it (Y/N)!” He gave you an energetic thumbs-up, looking like he was pretty amped for the idea. Kirishima was always one for palling around with his classmates.

“Great! Cuz I had a GREAT idea for a movie…” You smiled happily when he agreed to the idea, clapping your hands excitedly, but then you made your claps nice and loud to catch everyone’s attention.

“Everyone~! Everyone! I have an announcement and a proposal!”

“(L/N)! As the class rep making announcements is my job.” Iida reminded you, but you paid him no mind.

“Shut up Iida!” You suddenly screeched at him, ignoring the shocked, indignant look on his face as well as some of the other shocked looks from your other classmates because of how loud you could be. Iida attempted to scold you, but you didn’t let him get a word in. “We’re too busy! I say we all take a break since we got the day off, and instead of training, let’s all watch a movie together!” You quickly took on a cheerful tone, which made only the smarter ones a little wary.

“And NO! You can’t back away from this, spend some time with us! Cuz if you don’t I’m gonna kick your butt!” You then declared somewhat angrily, and of course, only Bakugou challenged you.

“Tch, forget it you pathetic excuse for a glowstick!”

“You’re just jealous cuz my light shines brighter than yo’ weak-ass explosions.” You brushed that off, and you laughed and pointed when Kirishima and Kaminari held him back from trying to attack you for the 4th time today.

“Anyhoo… I’d better see you at movie night biatch~.” You smiled smugly at the growling teen, who WANTED to just blow you up but he knew Kirishima had a thing for you. This would be the only nice thing he’d do for him for a while…

Speaking of which, Kirishima looked pretty damn happy about the idea of a movie night with the class, “So (Y/N)… what kinda movie did ya have in plan?” He asked politely, the same question everyone else had been wondering since it was your idea.

However, the others noticed your smile quickly turning into a smirk. “Let’s watch a good old-fashioned horror flick tonight… I have this one REALLY good one that I’ve been meaning to bust out to show my best friends so… yeah…” That little suggestion made a few heads turn, and a few eyes widened which made your smirk widen, especially when you saw Kirishima’s nervous look.

“A horror movie…?”

“Yeah! Nothing says togetherness like watching a movie so scary you might piss yourself and cry your fucking eyes out…” You clasped your hands together, your smirk turning darker as most of your other classmates looked hesitant, save a few who looked interested.

“That could be fun! I love scary movies! They’re so exciting don’t you guys think?!” Hagakure, your partner-in-crime had excitedly agreed with you and backed up your decision. And if she was being honest, these movies were fun for her because her invisibility allowed her to indulge in a little fun when she would prank some people when they were scared out of their wits.

“I enjoy those kind of movies. They tend to have some interesting story-lines, so I’m okay with watching a horror movie.” Tsuyu said, despite her blank expression she was up for it.

“I agree. I would watch one of those.” Tokoyami was quick to agree with her since he was very much an avid horror movie fan, befitting how much of a goth he was. “You may or may not have seen the movie I have in mind before.” You pointed out, since if there’s one thing you and Tokoyami got along with it was your fondness for horror movies.

“Surprise me.” He almost challenged you, which just made your grin grow, especially when you saw the other looks on your classmates’ faces, especially poor sweet Izuku and your dear Kirishima…

“I’m in! I ain’t afraid of no scary movie!” Kaminari claimed, since scary movies didn’t exactly bother him as much as it did for others, but not many of his classmates looked like they believed him. “Me neither!” However, he started a bit of a trend when Mina shared his sentiments, and now many of them started to feel the need to prove their bravery, and to just see how ‘scary’ this movie was…

“H-Hey now! Look if anyone’s not a fan of scary movies then maybe… you guys don’t have to watch it.” Kirishima wanted to be nice though, and make sure no one felt pressured to watch the movie, even though you could just tell what his ulterior motive was: He didn’t like scary movies.

“Heh… let em watch it Kirishima, it’ll give them a lesson in bravery… I mean… what are you really playing at bro? Are you chicken?” You smirked and crossed your arms, satisfied when Kirishima flinched at such a very ‘unmanly’ accusation.

“No! I’m no chicken! I’m just giving them a choice that’s all!”

“It’s okay if you’re chicken, I mean Tokoyami’s the bird here but I guess we just didn’t notice you wearing your chicken hat until now. Though I guess your hair looks chicken-esque enough.” You said, sadistically smirking at the poor guy, whose face was turning as red as his hair.

“H-Hey! Don’t call my hair chicken! This is peer pressure! Come on that’s such an unmanly thing to do!”

“You’re just saying that cuz you’re a big, FAT, chicken!”

“(Y/N)! This is so not cool! Stop saying that!” Kirishima’s blush darkened as you didn’t stop your taunting.

“Chicken~.” You sang-songed, poking him on the forehead to add to your teasing, even when he backed away, “Stop it!”

“Chicken!” You didn’t stop, you were loving how embarrassed he was getting when you started to poke at his hair and even pull a strand out purely for the hell of it.

“OW! I’m NOT a chicken!!” He cringed as soon as he felt that little strand plucked out as he gave you a rare look of mild annoyance which looked beautiful with his flushed cheeks. You almost felt guilty for being so mean to him, but the tsundere in you was telling you that he deserved it for making you love him so much.

But the guilt was winning as you took it down a notch, “Okay Kiri… I believe you…” Your voice softened a bit, and Kirishima wasn’t sure whether to feel comfortable or nervous since he’s learned to predict how unpredictable you could be. It didn’t help when you put your hand on his shoulder, “I suppose you’re only a chicken if you can’t fight against villains like you have… so… okay… you’re not a chicken… and you don’t HAVE to watch the movie if you don’t want to… and I’ll just make fun of you in private to the girls in the locker room.” You sounded a little bit gentle, and you smiled when you saw Kirishima perk up a bit when you took back the ‘chicken’ insult, but instantly he pouted at the last thing you said.

You always did this. But it’s not like he hated it, he actually liked the attention you gave him and you were nice to him at times, which he really liked because it proved what he thought about you. That you were actually pretty cool and that you had a heart underneath all the jokes. But, he couldn’t quite let you win, or get away with calling him chicken.

“Heh. There won’t be any need for that, I’ll prove that I’m no chicken! Scary movies are nothing! I mean… a real man isn’t afraid of a little movie… I’m man enough to watch this!” He was up for this challenge, well… not really, but he’d prove that he could be manly and take a scary movie! It was just a movie! Nothing in them were real… and he knew it!

But you couldn’t help but smirk when he was finally on board, and disregarded the fact that a few of your other classmates… particularly Izuku, Uraraka, Kouda, Jirou and Mineta weren’t really on board. And Sero and Kaminari finally succeeded in getting Bakugou to very reluctantly agree just so they would stop bugging him.

“Perfection…” You resisted the urge to do a ‘villain laugh’ as soon as it was all set in stone for tonight…

4 HOURS LATER at 7 pm…

“Okay…” You were getting the movie ready as you clicked on the remote, “I’m telling you guys right now. That this movie inspired me to pretty much NEVER go anywhere where there’s mountains in my life… after this, you’ll understand why I’m never going anywhere that’s too dark again.” You were kind of exaggerating, but at the same time you kind of meant what you were saying since… the movie kinda traumatized you when you were younger.

Only a few of your classmates took your warning seriously, but Bakugou thought you were being stupid as he scoffed. However, Kirishima sat beside him and he was already looking very nervous and appeared to believe every word you were saying…

What in the world was in this movie to make you stay away from dark places and mountains…?

“There can be revelry in the dark you know?” Tokoyami asked you, but you just chuckled a little bit, “Maybe for you… because the dark is your advantage but… I ain’t never stepping foot into a pitch black place again… not after this movie…” You gave your cryptic explanation, which did nothing to ease your more nervous friends.

“I-It’s that bad…?” Uraraka sounded concerned, and she was just as scared as Izuku and Kirishima was. While horror movies didn’t freak her out that bad, some of them still scared her. And you nodded as you turned the lights off, “Oh… it’s bad…”

Kirishima put his brave face on, even though everything you said wasn’t making him feel any less nervous, “I’m sure it’s not that bad… we can handle anything! Nothing’s too scary for heroes!” He declared optimistically, and you couldn’t help but smile, he was so sweet it was perfect that you chose this movie to scare the Mr. Bojangles out of him…

“Yeah, yeah just start the fucking thing already!” Bakugou was getting impatient though, and demanded that you start the damn thing as you scoffed and just started the movie, “All right already! Keep your panties on…” You muttered under your breath, but that didn’t escape Bakugou’s surprisingly sharp hearing.

“WHAT DID YOU SAY?!”

You had to cover your mouth to quell your snickers as Kirishima managed to calm down the blonde to get him to shut up when the movie started…

50 MINUTES LATER…

The claustrophobic setting was enough to unnerve your classmates as they watched rather intently and felt nervous for the women in the film.

Mineta at first was excited because there was mostly women in the movie, but as soon as thing were getting intense he was shaking like a leaf, and he practically fainted as soon as Holly broke her leg in a rather graphic manner.

But Aoyama actually fainted as soon as he saw Holly’s leg bone sticking out after falling and breaking it, which urged a rather frantic Iida to quickly to lie the boy down with his head on a pillow until he woke up. Similarly, Jirou had to look away as the graphic sight alone made her feel nauseous, and neither Sero or Ojiro fared much better as Sero covered his mouth and averted his gaze from the scene, and Ojiro nearly gagged the more he focused on the bone and blood…

Much to your immense amusement, even if you did feel bad for Aoyama. You certainly didn’t expect anyone to faint. Sick at best, but not enough to faint…

“Oh that’s nasty…” Kaminari didn’t feel as sick as Jirou or Ojiro did but it was clear he couldn’t look at it either, “Eek!” Mina had squealed and closed her eyes once that part came on and practically held a disgusted and mildly frightened Yaoyorozu, “I-It’s okay Ashido… it’s not real…” She tried to comfort the girl, and kind of felt really horrible for Holly even if she was just a fictional character. The injury looked horrible…

Izuku, shockingly wasn’t the most horrified since he’s suffered injuries not unlike that before, but seeing it on someone else was still alarming and frightening to look at. And Uraraka gasped and involuntarily hid her face in Izuku’s shoulder. But then they both gasped heavily at the sudden close contact and pulled away, averting each other’s gazes and blushing darkly. Beside them Todoroki didn’t seem disinterested, if anything he seemed pretty focused on the movie even if that injury was a little bit hard to look at.

“That’s inaccurate. You’re supposed to set the bone once before you splint it in place.” He stated what he knew about injuries based on his own training and what his shitty old man had taught him. “You’re never ever try to reinsert a protruding bone from an open fracture like that.” Yaoyorozu backed up his claim, which made you kinda giggle at how much these two knew.

“Heh… the least movies can do is use correct medical knowledge eh?” You wondered after listening to them, but you were distracted when you saw Kirishima shivering as he tried to not focus so much on how graphic that injury as he gulped hard and resisted any part of him that felt nauseous or sick after seeing… bone… blood… and Holly screaming when they tried to reset the bone…

He swallowed whatever was in his throat and tried rising back up, gagging quietly as you tried your hardest not to snicker at the poor thing. He was so freaked out…

And this wasn’t even the best part.

You heard a sharp gasp though from Kirishima as soon as Sarah saw some kind of creature in the cave, and he was trembling all over again. He knew what that meant, and he wasn’t looking forward to what was happening next, he knew a jump scare was coming soon.

“Y-You all saw that right…?” He asked nervously as many of his classmates made little mumbles of acknowledgement, “Who couldn’t have seen that idiot?” Bakugou rolled his eyes at how clearly scared his friend was, even if he wouldn’t admit that this movie was… surprisingly hardcore, the injury looked pretty real, so real it actually made him cringe the first time he saw it…

“Hehe… don’t worry Kirishima…” You smiled and placed your hand on the redhead’s shoulder, scooting closer to him even when he tried to stop shaking so badly and gulped hard. Was this your plan? To scare him? He was starting to wonder. He wanted to avoid watching any of the more unnerving parts, but he couldn’t since you were right next to him, and making sure he WAS watching it…

And you resisted the urge to snicker like a maniac when you saw that Kirishima wasn’t the only one trying to not watch the movie. Shoji averted his eyes every now and then whenever something disturbing showed up, he didn’t dare look at Holly’s broken leg and Satou was too frightened to eat the sweets he had in preparation for this movie. While Kouda was covering his ears and had his eyes closed as he trembled where he sat next to a rather calm, collected Tokoyami, who was clearly enthralled by the movie.

“How have I never seen this movie? The dark, suffocating atmosphere is frighteningly realistic in that setting…” He thought outloud, obviously approving of your movie choice as you giggled a little bit, “It’s different from other horror movies I’ve seen, but in a good way. It’s not cliché at all.” Tsuyu agreed with Tokoyami and looked just as interested as she did, and you couldn’t help but smile proudly. “Told ya it was good. And this ain’t even the best part.” That piqued some of your classmates interest and dread.

“W-What’s the best part…?” Kirishima asked you nervously, his form quivering as you gave him that insidious grin you were infamous for. “If I told you it’d take away from it Kiri…” You used a cutesy voice even though Kirishima knew better, especially at this moment where he figured out your evil plan…

He shouldn’t have been watching, he should have actually just said ‘no’ to this movie instead of pretending to not be scared. Even though he thought ‘what kind of man is too scared to watch a movie?’. It was conflicting and embarrassing, especially now that you were seeing him all freaked out over a little movie…

You almost felt bad when you saw how scared he was getting, but after 5 more minutes in you noticed just how dark the room was, thanks to the sun setting and making the room nearly black and only the light on the TV allowed you to see most of your classmates getting nervous as they focused on the scene involving the dead animal bones…

A wide grin found its way on your lips as the ‘best part’ came up…

At least 10 of your classmates let out shrieks of terror as soon as the ugly cave monster showed up, and a few had jumped out of their seats from fear.

“AAAAAHHH!”

“IT’S IN THE CAVE!!”

“RUN OUT OF THERE!!

“EEEEEEK!”

“WHERE’D IT GO?!”

“OH MY GOD!!”

“WHAT THE HELL IS THAT THING?!”

“OH SHIT!!”

You laughed outloud as your classmates all shouted almost as if they were in the movie and as if the women could actually hear them, and identified Mina and Kirishima as the loudest screamers when you saw Mina practically hiding behind the couch and Kirishima was shaking in his seat and you swore you saw tears in his eyes. The poor thing did not exactly have what you would call a manly scream and you were loving it. Sadistic as it was, you felt successful in ‘getting back at him’ for making you love him, and at the same time you felt kind of horrible…

“Are you okay…?” This time, you didn’t sound like you were teasing him, you were concerned since he looked pretty scared.

“I-I… I think I peed a little bit…” He said in a somewhat shaky voice, and you tried your hardest to not snicker in amusement as you tried to soothe his nerves and rub his back gently, “Don’t worry buddy it’s all a movie…” As much as you loved how this turned out, you were starting to feel a little worse by the moment.

“I nearly wet my pants…” Sero then spoke up as he trembled where he sat, and Kaminari promptly scooted away from him. “I guess… I wouldn’t blame you…” However, he was just as terrified as his friend was. If he were in that situation, he would have freaked out just like the women did.

But before anyone could relax, the creature showed up yet again and everyone was on edge yet again now that the monsters were there to make the movie all the more horrifying.

Aoyama finally came to from where he lied, sitting up and rubbing his head with a low groan, “W-What did I miss…?” He asked, and as soon as he saw the screen featuring Holly getting her throat torn and ripped apart, he fainted yet again much to Iida’s distress as he jumped a little bit at the scene himself.

Wow, it was that scary to everyone?

Well, Tsuyu, Tokoyami and Bakugou still looked pretty entertained. In fact, the latter was smirking and legitimately entertained as soon as Juno began fighting that ugly fucker.

Of course you expected those three to be comfortable watching a horror movie, but everyone else, especially Izuku, Uraraka and Kirishima looked like they weren’t going to get any sleep tonight. And it got worse as soon as Sarah was forced to watch the monsters eat Holly’s corpse in all it’s gory glory complete with the sickening sounds of flesh being torn and stripped by the creature’s sharp teeth.

Uraraka and Izuku practically squealed in unison as they trembled and turned away with their eyes shut, wondering why did they actually stay and watch this with everyone. Kirishima held back the scream creeping in his throat, at least until he thought bile was rising up and he gagged a little bit. You should have been amused but you weren’t…

‘Aww man… I can’t be happy when he’s like this…’

You thought guiltily as you sighed and put your hand on the redhead’s shoulder, which made him gasp sharply due to that sudden touch startling him, “(Y-Y/N…?”

“Dude… if it’s too much you don’t have to watch… I promise not to mock you behind your back if you do…” You weren’t playing or anything, and Kirishima could tell, “What…? Hehe… I-I’m all right really… it’s like you said it’s just a movie…” He nervously forced a small laugh and crooked grin, “I’m not a chicken after all…”

Kirishima claimed and tried to look brave… for about 5 seconds until he saw Sam and Rebecca get ambushed by one of the monsters in a jump scare that made him jump in his seat and let out a scream, “O-Okay fine I’m a chicken!” This time, he did turn away with his eyes downcast and looking miserable as he started mentally beating himself up and calling himself a coward for letting a little movie scare him. Part of him wanted to cry, but he refused, no way he’d look even more like a wuss in front of you.

He was such a loser. This was so unmanly in every way possible, and on top of that you were there to see him act like such a wuss. Kirishima always knew he was a bit of a wuss when it came to these kind of things, but he thought he could brave it, he really did…

‘What have I done?! Oh Kirishima… no matter what I do I can’t shake these feelings off, and now I feel horrible!’

“Eijiro.”

Kirishima perked up as soon as he heard you say his name, and your heart was beating at what you were about to do next, but you couldn’t stand to see him like this. “C’mere you doofus…” Quietly and discreetly you placed your lips on his forehead which made him perk up and freeze, his cheeks turning as red as his hair as he stared at you wide-eyed in extreme surprise.

“W-Wha… w-wha-what… w-was…?” He didn’t mean to stutter, but he definitely did not expect you to do that as you pouted and blushed heavily. “I’m sorry okay? I didn’t think this movie would freak you out that much…” You muttered and he blushed even more, looking away in shame as you put your hand on his face to make him look at you.

“Admitting you’re chicken is manly though… don’t feel so bad just because you find it scary. I’m still afraid of the freaking dark because of this movie… the only reason I’m not scared is because I’m so close to you…” That sounded kinda sappy, but you meant what you said as you tried not to smile when you saw Kirishima’s look of surprise.

He was touched though, and felt a beam of happiness beginning to blossom in his heart as he smiled wide, “You… you mean that?” He asked somewhat bashfully, and you rolled your eyes a little bit.

“Yes you mook… I really do. And the truth is… argh… dammit… I like you stupid…!” You whispered to him as your whole face burned, and your heart beating out of your chest now that you finally admitted it. Kirishima somehow looked even more surprised, part of him always thought that maybe you had a thing for him, but now this was confirmation that you definitely did…

And he couldn’t help the grin rising on his lips as he pulled you in for a hug, smiling that smile that you fell in love with, “Hahaha! W-Wow um... I... you know I have to be honest I... I like you too (Y/N)! I think you’re pretty awesome…. And seriously manly… to be able to watch a movie like this… and for other reasons too but… yeah I… I like you too…” He blushed and sounded a little shyer when he said the ‘L’ word to you, as he truly did return your feelings and you were just… so happy…

You almost completely forgot about the movie as you smiled warmly and hugged him back. “Good… that is exactly how I feel about you too… you’re the manliest guy I’ve ever met you know that?” Deciding to go soft, you smiled when you saw his smile brightening, but before he could squeeze you affectionately, he made the mistake of looking at the movie when a loud monster screech startled him and made him and his classmates nearly all scream and he did squeeze you… out of terror and he practically clung to you like a sloth to a tree.

At first you were shocked, but then you quickly snickered at his reaction and loved how his arms felt around you as you patted him on the head, kinda stroking the spikes a little bit. “(Y/N)’s got you…” A little condescendingly you spoke to him a soft tone, which made him kinda pout as he made sure to avoid watching the scarier parts while everyone was trembling in terror.

“A-Are you okay Ashido…?” Yaoyorozu asked Mina, who nodded despite her fear, “Y-Yeah… why…?”

“W-We heard you scream just now…” Jirou replied shortly afterwards, but was surprised at Mina’s confused look, “That wasn’t me…” Mina, for once didn’t scream at that last part since she had gotten used to the atmosphere. But everyone knew what Jirou was saying, because after seeing the jump scare featuring Rebecca getting her stomach torn and eaten alive by the monsters they heard someone shriek…

Very femininely and high-pitched…

“Huh? Then who screamed? Uraraka?” Kaminari looked to see the girls, but all of them were shaking their heads because they had held their tongues to avoid embarrassing themselves. “It was very girly sounding…” Despite not getting an answer, Kaminari just snickered a bit and everyone didn’t see Todoroki staring down at his lap and silently blushing as he made sure to avoid seeing anymore of the movie.

You saw. Because it was your job to make sure everyone was watching the movie, and you didn’t expect Todoroki Shouto to scream like a little girl, or Kirishima, the love of your life to hold you so tightly as his grip on you didn’t loosen in the slightest as you held him close and practically cuddled him.

Boy this night was turning out better than you thought…

25 MINUTES LATER…

The ending credits came on and you were a mix of amused, ecstatic and enamored as you didn’t let go of Kirishima, just in love with how soft yet firm he felt thanks to all those muscles on him that you found ridiculously attractive and tempting to just touch, and now you were feeling them up so close. It was like a muscular teddy bear you just wanted to sleep with in bed and never let go. And you had seen what he looked like under the clothes

However, his grip on you slowly loosened now that the movie was over but he still looked a little unnerved after everything he had to see.

“Soooooo… what did you guys think?!” You excitedly asked your friends and classmates, but many of them were rather… shell-shocked, with only Tokoyami, Tsuyu and Bakugou appearing the most entertained.

“That actually wasn’t a shitty movie after all.” Bakugou looked surprisingly calm as he approved of your movie choice, and you actually smiled. “Yeah I liked it a lot. It was one of the better horror movies I’ve seen in a while.” Tsuyu was next to say how much she enjoyed the movie and Tokoyami nodded besides her. “That was brilliant. I enjoyed every moment of it. I agree with Asui, it’s a lot better compared to the more modern horror movies.”

Their approval made you start to smile a little more smugly than you wanted to, “Hehe… why thanks~.” You giggled a little bit, but everyone else…

“T-That… t-hat… w-w-a-was… horrifying…” Izuku barely managed to get his words out as he and Uraraka were still trembling on the couch they were on. “I don’t want to go visit the mountains anymore…”

“I-It’s only a movie! It’s fictitious and there is no such thing as cave monsters!” Iida tried to make his friends feel better, but you just smiled at him.

“You don’t know that Iida… I mean not all caves are explored… who knows what’s in there? There just might be a cave monster somewhere around the world.” You didn’t help at all and added to the fear as many of the others started to tremble.

“She has a point…” Todoroki didn’t want to believe it, but this movie was… surprisingly and legitimately frightening. He didn’t want to imagine getting stuck in a mountain and suffocating from the lack of oxygen while something is potentially lurking in the dark.

“I-I’m sleeping with my lights on tonight…” Aoyama said what the rest of the Dekusquad was thinking, now that they had the wits scared out of them.

“Momo… can you please make me a night light…?” Mina asked Yaoyorozu because that movie seriously freaked her out, “M-Me too…?” Kaminari quickly asked right after Mina did, but the sweet Yaoyorozu did agree to make them some lights for tonight…

You didn’t know whether to be amused or kinda guilty. “Um… you don’t think this movie’s gonna scar anyone for life do you…?” You asked a shaky Kirishima, “I… I don’t think so…” He didn’t sound confident at all as you nervously smiled…

“BOO!”

Kirishima suddenly screamed and many of his classmates followed short when they heard him, and he jumped fearfully. But you had no idea who did that… at least until you heard your friend laughing.

“Hee-hee-hee! Sorry! I couldn’t really resist…” Hagakure was giggling, but nobody could see her so that definitely means she had stripped to be completely invisible. “Ahahaha! Nice one…” You approved of her little joke even when a few of your classmates were shouting at you for starting them, and Kirishima was trembling where he stood.

Smiling, you went over to him and held his hand to take him to his dorm-room, “C’mon…”

Kirishima let you lead him because he was honestly really scared now that he saw everything from that movie and some of the images and scenes weren’t going to leave his head for a while. He couldn’t stop thinking about it now… the blood, the cave-in, the monsters, the women screaming…

Even when it was time for him to go to bed he couldn’t really get them out of his head, and you knew this. So that’s why you were staying with him even when he got in his pajamas and lied in his bed, unwilling to turn the lights off and he almost freaked out when you were about to.

“Don’t!” He suddenly yelled, and you were honestly surprised…

Was he that scared?

Now you really felt bad. “Oh Kiri… I’m sorry… I’m so sorry…” You smiled a little sadly, turning off the light as he gasped and tried his hardest not to look so alarmed as you made your way over to him on his bed. “I’m sorry for calling you chicken…” You patted him gently on the back, and he blushed a little bit at how close you were but your comfort was making him feel a little bit better.

“Nah… it’s okay… you weren’t wrong, I should have just owned up to being a chicken…” Kirishima admitted to that, and felt bad for lying about since lying was not a manly thing to do at all. “You’re the cutest chicken ever. And besides… you’re not chicken at all where it counts.” You kissed him on the cheek, reminding him of the villains he’s fought against, and his bravery when he and Izuku went to go rescue Bakugou.

And Kirishima couldn’t help but grin shyly with a pink blush on his cheeks, “Awww… thanks!” He beamed as he actually kissed you on the forehead in return, which made you freeze and blush heavily as you let out a rather dorky, giddy little giggle…

“Uh… this might sound kinda lame but… do you mind… staying the night?” Kirishima then sounded shy upon asking you that, and you were still in a bit of shock from the kiss, but you nonetheless grinned and happily nodded. “I don’t mind at all~!” You said happily as the two of you exchanged big smiles and an equally big hug.

It took a while for him to actually go to sleep, but you were next to him in bed and the dark felt a little less scary.

You on the other hand, weren’t scared at all. You succeeded in getting the boy you loved close to you. Sure, you might have had to scare the pants off of him, but he was all yours now.

BONUS ENDING…

“Good morning cla-…”

Aizawa didn’t expect to walk into his classroom to see almost all of his students asleep on their desks. The ones who were awake looked a mix of exhausted and terrified with their eyes wide, droopy and bloodshot. And the only ones who were awake at all were you, Kirishima, Tokoyami, Tsuyu and Bakugou.

His eyebrow twitched ever so slightly in irritation when he picked up on what could have happened, “That’s it… no more horror movies on a school night…”

Little did you know, Aizawa planned on finding that movie of yours and confiscating it, as to spare his students from being traumatized any further…

You wouldn’t mind. You were finally with the boy you loved.

HAPPY APRIL FOOLS TUMBLR~!!!!!! :D <3 :3

#bnha kirishima #boku no hero academia kirishima #Kirishima Eijirou #kirishima x reader #mha kirishima #eijirou x reader #kirishima eijiro x reader #bnha eijirou #kirishima x you #kirishima is a good boy #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #mha x reader #bnha x reader #my hero academia kirishima #april fools #kirishima x reader fluff

84 notes · View notes