#oh yessssssssss
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legobiwan · 2 years ago
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Oh Mario, I'm about to ruin your whole year here.
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“It’s a Pure Heart,” Tippi says, certain.
Bowser’s face scrunches in confusion. “Yeah, but what happened to it?”
“End of the world, probably,” a drawling voice chimes in.
Mario’s gut plummets through the floor.
A familiar figure appears from behind the partially entombed Pure Heart, clad in a black jumpsuit and green bandana. The lanky masked man saunters forward, making a sneering appraisal of their little band, the corner of his lip rising as his gaze lands on Mario.
“Well, look who showed up to the party!” Luigi taunts, giving them an exaggerated wave. “How’s it going, Jumpsalot?”
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bitwynn · 2 years ago
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I DID IT
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IVE PEAKED
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ghosts-and-blue-sweaters · 1 year ago
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Also Merry Christmas!! (Almost)
WOO MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO JESUS WHOOPEE!!!
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flamingo--ing · 1 year ago
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i love casper especially when he pieces things together like good job! you figured it out! since im not rlly supposed to tell him things he doesnt already know
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gaydiation-poisoning · 6 months ago
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@oh--jeez -POINTING LOUDLY-
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Star Wars in Ojibwe/Anishinaabemowin!
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crownquill · 7 months ago
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MY LIFE HAS BEEN FUCKING CHANGED OH MY GODDDD
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BETTER THAN REVENGE (TAYLOR'S VERSION)
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joffyworld · 10 days ago
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OHHHHHHHH OMG OMG OMG SO COOL EATING EATING EAITNG THIS ARGGHHHHH
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i couldnt stop thinking about the idea of a toww whos *extremely* manipulative. ive always seen narinder (when he was toww) as a prick, yeah, but fairly straightforward with lamb.
this version (mahendra, a genet) seems very nice on first meeting, and goat (ezra) was completely taken in, but he considers all his vessels to be his playthings. its a big shame he started falling for this one because they make him SO mad just by existing.
ezra is basically the opposite to lamb, hes not a natural at managing a cult, he uses fear to keep people in line but quitly finds it kind of distasteful, and he was completely duped by mahendras story of being the victim.
ezra cant help but let her live once defeated, and she wastes no time getting back to being smarmy. the two of them have a horrible but hot situationship going on
songs for vibes include grenadine by dreadlight for mahendra and used to the darkness by des rocs for ezra
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ghosts-and-blue-sweaters · 1 year ago
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OH MY GOSH GRACIE I HAVENT LISTENED TO THE OG IAFIAP IN SI LONG I FORGOT HOW MUCH I LOVE IT AAAAAAAAAAAAAA
YOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OH MY GOSH YES ALSGAJSGAISGKAGS
This inspired me to listen to the song in the car today, and oh my gosh. You are so right. What the heck. I DID NOT REMEMBER THE SONG BEING THAT GOOD WHAT?? I FREAKING LOVE IT NOW WHATABEISGSISGSIGSISVS THE WAY HE SINGS IS DIFFERENT THAN HOW HE SANG IN THE LOVEJOY VERSION AND THE GUITAR HAS SUCH AN AMAZING SOUND AND OUGH
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moonselune · 27 days ago
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I absolutely love how you write for the bg3 companions!!
Can we get romanced companions reacting to seeing Tav being approached by an abusive ex, who grabs them violently when Tav tries to walk away from the confrontation? They are grabbed violently by the hair, neck, wrist, etc? Thank you!!
omg yessssssssss tw everyone this will contain themes of abuse and domestic violence so if you are uncomfortable with that please click off and I will see you in the next one xox
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Karlach:
The tavern was warm and lively, filled with the buzz of laughter, clinking mugs, and the hum of an old bard strumming away in the corner. You sat close to Karlach at a small, dimly lit table, her broad grin as radiant as ever. Her laughter boomed over some silly tale you'd told, her joy contagious as the two of you sipped from your mugs. The night was going perfectly—until they showed up.
You didn’t see your ex at first, but you heard their voice, a cold and unwelcome shard of your past cutting through the tavern’s warmth. “Well, well. Look who it is.”
Your stomach dropped. Turning slowly, you saw them, standing just a few feet away with that same cruel smirk you’d hoped to never see again. They looked the same, too—bitter, angry, and clearly still holding a grudge. Karlach’s laughter faded as she noticed your sudden shift in demeanor. Her eyes flicked between you and the person now looming over your table.
“Not here,” you said softly, your voice steady but laced with warning. “Don’t make a scene. Just leave.”
They laughed, a sharp, mocking sound that turned heads. “Oh, I’m making a scene?” they sneered, stepping closer. “You think you can just walk out of my life and act like nothing happened?”
You tried to stand, but before you could, their hand shot out and grabbed your arm, fingers digging into your skin.
“You’re not going anywhere,” they hissed.
The motion was so sudden that the tavern seemed to freeze for a moment. The mug in Karlach’s hand thudded onto the table, her expression darkening in an instant.
“Get your hands off them,” she said, her voice a low, warning growl.
Your ex sneered at her, but before they could say anything more, Karlach shot up from her seat. She shoved them back with one powerful hand, forcing them to release you. The force sent them stumbling, their eyes widening in shock.
“You okay?” Karlach asked, her warm brown eyes filled with concern as she turned to you. Her hand came to your cheek, her thumb brushing gently against your skin.
“I’m fine,” you muttered, though your voice wavered slightly. “Let’s just—”
Before you could finish, your ex stormed back, their face twisted in rage. They lunged toward you, but they didn’t get far. Karlach’s fist met their face in a flash of fiery determination, the impact so loud it echoed through the now-silent tavern. Your ex crumpled to the floor in a heap, unconscious before they even hit the ground.
Karlach flexed her fingers, looking down at them with disdain.
“Idiot,” she muttered, then turned back to you. “C’mon, love. Let’s get out of here.”
You nodded, your hands trembling slightly as you reached for your coat. As the two of you walked out into the cool night air, Karlach slipped an arm around your shoulders, her presence grounding you.
“Sorry about that,” you murmured after a few moments of silence. “I didn’t think they’d—”
“Stop,” Karlach said gently, her voice firm but kind. “You don’t owe me an apology for their bullshit. What’s their deal, anyway?”
You hesitated but eventually sighed. “We were together a long time ago. It… wasn’t a good relationship. They were controlling, mean. It took everything I had to leave.”
Karlach’s jaw tightened, and you could see the flicker of rage in her eyes as she looked straight ahead.
“Should’ve killed the arsehole,” she muttered under her breath.
You chuckled softly, though it was tinged with nervousness. “You don’t have to solve everything with violence, you know.”
She looked down at you, her expression softening.
“Not everything,” she said with a small grin. “But that? They had it coming.” Her arm tightened around you. “No one gets to treat you like that. Not while I’m here.”
A warm wave of gratitude washed over you as you leaned into her, the safety of her presence more comforting than words could express. “Thank you, Karlach.”
“Always, love,” she replied, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. As the two of you walked home, you felt lighter, knowing you were no longer alone in facing the ghosts of your past.
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Minthara:
The streets of Baldur's Gate were alive with the din of activity: merchants haggling in the marketplace, children darting between the crowd, and the occasional bard strumming a jaunty tune. You walked alongside Minthara, her presence commanding, as always. Her arm curled around your waist with a possessiveness that was both protective and tender. Her silvery hair caught the evening light, and her voice, low and firm, reached your ear.
“We are being followed,” she murmured, her lips brushing your temple. “Someone’s gaze lingers far too long on you.”
Your heart sank, a sinking pit of familiarity clawing at your gut. You subtly glanced over your shoulder under the guise of adjusting your scarf, and that’s when you saw them: your abusive ex. Their figure lingered in the shadows, weaving through the crowd like a snake, their eyes fixed on you with that same unsettling intensity you had tried so hard to forget.
“Dammit,” you muttered, rolling your eyes. The weight of the moment sank in, and you let out a frustrated sigh.
Minthara’s amber eyes narrowed as she studied your expression.
“Who is that?” she asked, her voice icy and sharp.
You hesitated, considering whether to brush it off, but you knew better than to lie to Minthara. “Do you remember the scar just above my hip?” you asked softly, barely above a whisper.
Her grip on your waist tightened as she nodded, her gaze fixed on you, unreadable yet intense.
“They gave it to me,” you admitted, keeping your voice steady. “It happened the day I tried to leave them. We fought, and—” You stopped, the memories creeping too close. “They’ve always had a hard time letting go.”
Minthara’s body went rigid. Her hand, still wrapped around your waist, stilled entirely, her nails pressing into the fabric of your tunic. Her jaw clenched, and before you could stop her, she uncoiled with terrifying precision and sprinted toward your ex.
“Minthara, wait!” you shouted, but it was useless. She was already closing the distance.
Your ex barely had time to react before Minthara tackled them to the ground with the force of a lioness taking down her prey. The crowd scattered, gasps and shouts echoing in the marketplace as she delivered blow after calculated blow. Each strike was vicious but efficient, aimed with the precision of someone trained to dismantle an opponent piece by piece. Her movements were smooth, brutal, and terrifyingly beautiful in their ruthlessness.
“Touch them again,” Minthara snarled, her voice low and venomous as she pressed her forearm against your ex’s throat, “and I will ensure that death would beg for you before I allow it.”
She delivered one final punch, leaving your ex groaning and crumpled in the dirt, their face bloodied and swollen. Satisfied, she stood, brushing her hands off as if she had merely swatted a fly. She strode back toward you, the calm precision of her movements making the crowd part before her like waves.
When she reached you, she lifted her chin, a faint, dangerous smile curling her lips.
“The injuries I’ve given them will take decades to heal,” she promised, her voice still simmering with fury. “And perhaps a century to scar.”
You stared at her, part of you unsure whether to admonish or thank her. Finally, you sighed, shaking your head. “Minthara, you didn’t have to—”
“They hurt you,” she cut in, her voice softening only slightly as her gaze bored into yours. “That is reason enough.”
She reached out, brushing her thumb against your cheek with unexpected tenderness. “You are mine to protect. That wretch deserved every ounce of pain I inflicted.”
Despite the ferocity of her words, the warmth in her touch reminded you why you trusted her so deeply. With a soft sigh, you nodded, leaning into her hand.
“Thank you,” you said quietly, the weight of her actions settling in. Her smile widened, pride glinting in her eyes.
“Of course, my heart. No one who dares harm you will ever go unpunished.” She took your hand and began walking again, her steps measured and sure. As the chaos in the marketplace faded behind you, you couldn’t help but feel safer than you ever had before.
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Lae'zel:
The bustling market was alive with noise: merchants shouting out their wares, children weaving between the stalls, and the occasional clang of metal as blacksmiths displayed their crafts. You and Lae’zel moved through the chaos, her sharp eyes scanning for supplies while you trailed beside her, taking in the sights. It was a moment of relative peace amidst your usual adventures.
And then, like a thunderclap on a clear day, you saw them. Your ex.
Before you could react, they were in front of you, their face lighting up with a joy that felt out of place—wrong, even. “There you are!” they exclaimed, pulling you into a hug so suddenly that you didn’t have time to resist. Their arms wrapped around you tightly, and you froze, your breath catching in your throat as panic set in. It wasn’t the embrace of an old friend—it was a claim, a reminder of the control they once held over you.
“I’ve missed you,” they said with a grin, pulling back to look at you. “We have to catch up sometime.”
They left without waiting for your reply, disappearing into the crowd as if they hadn’t just turned your world upside down. You stood there, motionless, your heart pounding and your thoughts racing.
Lae’zel, who had been perusing a nearby stand, turned to you. Her amber eyes immediately narrowed, her expression shifting from mild annoyance at the interruption to something far more dangerous.
“What is this?” she demanded, stepping closer. “You look like you’re about to fight a dragon with a pitchfork. Who were they?”
You couldn’t speak at first. Your throat felt dry, and the words were stuck, lodged somewhere between fear and shame. Finally, you managed to stammer out, “That… That was my ex.”
Lae’zel’s eyes sharpened, her gaze cutting through you like a blade.
“And this is your reaction to a past lover? You are no stranger to affection, but you looked as though the mere touch of them turned your blood to acid.” Her voice lowered, her tone becoming more dangerous. “What did they do to you?”
You tried to explain, but the words faltered. Your lips moved, but the memories caught up with you, dragging you back into a place you didn’t want to revisit. You didn’t need to say it, though—Lae’zel saw the truth in your silence.
She cursed violently in Gith, the harsh, guttural sounds slicing through the air. Her hand tightened around her weapon, and her whole body tensed like a predator ready to strike.
“They hurt you,” she said, her voice barely above a growl. “I will take their head and present it to you as a trophy.”
She turned, already scanning the crowd for their retreating form, but you reached out, grabbing her arm.
“Wait,” you said, your voice trembling. “Just… wait a moment.”
Lae’zel hesitated, her muscles twitching with the need for action, but she stayed. Her eyes never left you as you closed yours and took a deep breath, trying to calm the storm within. She stayed close, her presence grounding you as you forced yourself to let go of the fear and focus on the present.
After a few moments, you opened your eyes and gave her a weak smile.
“Thank you,” you said, your voice steadier now. “I just needed a moment.”
Her gaze softened slightly, but the fire in her eyes hadn’t dimmed.
“Are you ready?” she asked, her voice low and dangerous. “Because I will not let this stand.”
You nodded, a small gesture, but it was all she needed. With a fierce grin, she turned on her heel and stalked into the crowd, her focus like a blade honed to perfection.
It didn’t take long for her to find them. You followed at a safe distance, your heart racing but unable to stop her now. She caught up to them near a fruit stall, grabbing them by the shoulder and spinning them around. They barely had time to react before Lae’zel shoved them against a wooden post, her face inches from theirs.
“You dare to touch what is mine?” she snarled, her voice loud enough to draw the attention of everyone nearby. “You have left scars on them that I cannot abide. For that, I will use your head as my footrest.”
The ex stammered, their confidence evaporating under her ferocity. Before they could say anything more, Lae’zel delivered a sharp blow to their stomach, doubling them over. She stepped back, letting them fall to their knees, then stood over them like a conqueror surveying her victory.
Satisfied that her message was clear, she turned and walked back to you, her expression fierce but triumphant.
“It is done,” she said simply. “They will not trouble you again.”
You let out a shaky laugh, relief washing over you despite the chaos. “Thank you,” you said, reaching out to take her hand.
Her grip was firm, reassuring. “No one hurts you and walks away unscathed,” she said. “Not while I draw breath.”
With that, she led you away, her protective presence a shield against the world.
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Shadowheart:
The party was vibrant, full of chatter, music, and laughter. The hum of lively conversation filled the grand hall as you and Shadowheart wove through the crowd, wine glasses in hand. You hadn’t been entirely thrilled about attending, but Shadowheart’s soft insistence and the promise of shared moments made it worthwhile.
That was until you saw them—your ex.
They were standing near the center of a small group, regaling their audience with some elaborate tale, their gestures animated and their voice dripping with charm. Your stomach turned when they noticed you, their expression lighting up with the kind of false familiarity that set your nerves on edge. They sidled over, slipping seamlessly into your space, and before you could react, they had drawn you into their circle.
Shadowheart, ever watchful, stayed close, her sharp eyes flicking between you and your ex.
“We can leave,” she murmured under her breath, her voice calm but concerned. “Say the word.”
You shook your head, managing a strained smile.
“I’ll be fine,” you assured her, though your grip on your glass tightened slightly. You didn’t want to ruin the evening for her.
As the conversation swirled, your ex began telling a story—one about you. They spoke as if the two of you were still an item, peppering their tale with biting remarks and veiled insults.
“Oh, you should’ve seen them back then,” they sneered, “always so scatterbrained. Couldn’t even get through a simple task without my help.”
The group laughed awkwardly, clearly sensing the tension. Your face burned with a mix of anger and humiliation, but before you could find your voice, Shadowheart stepped forward, her demeanor cool and composed, but her eyes as sharp as daggers.
She interrupted smoothly, her voice cutting through the conversation like a blade.
“That reminds me of a story from my past,” she said, her tone conversational yet chilling. The group turned to her, captivated by the quiet authority in her voice. “There was a time when I dealt with an exceptionally arrogant prisoner. They fancied themselves clever—always talking back, thinking they were in control. So I decided to teach them a lesson.” She paused, taking a sip of her wine as if the next part were merely an afterthought. “I ripped out their tongue and fed it to them.”
The silence that followed was deafening. The group stared at her, their eyes wide, as the weight of her words hung heavy in the air. Your ex, who had been so confident mere moments ago, visibly paled, their mouth opening and closing as if searching for a retort.
Shadowheart tilted her head slightly, a faint, dangerous smile playing on her lips. “It’s remarkable how much quieter some people can be after a simple… correction.”
Your ex stammered something unintelligible before hastily excusing themselves, practically fleeing from the room. The tension broke, and you couldn’t help but laugh—a genuine, bubbling sound of relief and delight. You turned to Shadowheart, your heart swelling with gratitude and affection.
“Thank you,” you said, grinning. “The look on their face… I’ll treasure that forever.”
Shadowheart leaned in, her lips brushing against yours in a tender yet possessive kiss.
“I love you,” she said softly, her words a vow as much as a declaration.
Then she pulled back slightly, her eyes glinting with something dark and resolute.
“Hold my wine,” she said, pressing her glass into your hand. “There’s something—or rather, someone—I need to deal with.”
Before you could protest, she was gone, her dark hair flowing like a shadow cutting through the crowd. You watched her go, a mixture of admiration and mild terror filling you. Whatever she had in mind, you knew one thing for certain: no one would dare cross her—or you—ever again.
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Jaheira:
The warm hum of Jaheira's household had always been a comfort to you. The chatter of the children, the occasional laughter, and the scent of a home-cooked meal mingled with the faint floral aroma of the plants she meticulously tended. You were setting the table, ready to sit down for the evening meal with Jaheira and her family, when an insistent knock sounded at the door.
The sound froze you in place. It wasn’t the friendly, casual knock of a neighbor or friend. No, it was sharp and demanding, like someone who felt entitled to be heard. Dread pooled in your stomach, but you swallowed it down. You weren’t that person anymore. You were stronger now, surrounded by people who cared for you.
Still, when you opened the door and saw your ex standing there, their familiar sneer twisting their features, that old fear reared its head.
“You shouldn’t be here,” you said, keeping your voice firm. “This isn’t the time or the place.”
Your ex scoffed, taking a step closer. “I’ll decide where I should be,” they spat. “We have unfinished business.”
Your heart raced, but you held your ground. “Leave,” you repeated, gripping the doorframe tightly. “Now.”
Their response was to shove you—hard. The force sent you stumbling back, and you hit the ground with a painful thud, the breath knocked out of you. Your ex marched inside, their eyes scanning the room like they owned it.
“Get out!” you shouted, your voice shaking more than you’d like.
The commotion brought Jaheira’s children rushing into the room. Jhessem and Tate were at your side in an instant, their small hands helping you sit up as they looked at you with wide, worried eyes. Fig, ever the fiery little warrior, grabbed her wooden sword and brandished it at your ex, her small frame trembling but determined.
“You leave them alone!” she yelled, her voice high-pitched but fierce.
Your ex laughed, a sound that sent shivers down your spine. But the laughter died when Jord and Rion stepped forward, their presence filling the room with an almost tangible force.
Jord, tall and broad-shouldered, the half-orc planted himself between the children and your ex.
“You’ve got two seconds to get out of this house,” he said, his voice low and rumbling with warning.
Rion, her sharp features twisted into a glare that could cut stone, pointed a finger at your ex.
“You do not belong here,” she said, her tone icy. “Leave before I make you.”
Despite the bravery of Jaheira’s children, you quickly pushed yourself to your feet, positioning yourself between them and your ex.
“This isn’t their fight,” you said firmly, your voice stronger now as you faced your abuser. “Leave them out of this. Leave us alone.”
Your ex sneered, taking a step toward you, but before they could say another word, the sound of measured, deliberate footsteps echoed from the staircase. Everyone turned as Jaheira descended, her eyes sharp as a hawk’s.
She took in the scene at a glance—the children bristling with protective anger, you standing tense and pale, and your ex, whose presence tainted the very air. Her expression darkened like a storm cloud.
“What is this?” she asked, her voice calm but carrying an unmistakable edge.
Your ex, ever the fool, sneered. “Just having a little chat.”
Jaheira’s gaze flicked to you. “Are they threatening you?” she asked, her voice low and dangerous.
Before you could answer, your ex made the mistake of laughing. “This is none of your business, old woman.”
Jaheira didn’t respond with words. Instead, she raised a hand, her fingers curling in a subtle motion. Thorned vines erupted from the floor, twisting and writhing like living snakes. They wrapped around your ex with terrifying speed, pinning their arms to their sides and tightening until they yelped in pain.
“Get them out of here,” Jaheira commanded, her voice like steel.
The vines obeyed, dragging your ex toward the door. They thrashed and cursed, but the thorns only dug in deeper. With a final, satisfying motion, the vines flung them out into the street. The door slammed shut behind them, and the vines retracted as if they had never been.
Jaheira turned to you, her eyes softening. You immediately started to apologize, guilt bubbling up in your chest. “Jaheira, I’m so sorry—I never thought they’d come here. I never wanted to put you or your children in danger—”
“Stop being ridiculous,” she interrupted, her tone gentle but firm. She stepped closer, her hands cupping your face as she looked you over. “Are you hurt?”
You shook your head, the lump in your throat making it hard to speak. “I’m okay.”
“Good,” she said, her hands dropping to your shoulders. “You’ve been through enough tonight. Rest now.”
“I’ll make some tea,” Jord said, already heading toward the kitchen with calm efficiency.
Fig tugged at your sleeve, her wooden sword still clutched in her hand. “We’ll always help you,” she said, her voice small but fierce.
You managed a smile, ruffling her hair. “Thank you, Fig.”
Jaheira wrapped an arm around your shoulders, guiding you toward the sitting area.
“You’re safe here,” she murmured, her voice steady and soothing. “No one—no one—will ever hurt you again.”
As you sank into the cushions, the tension slowly leaving your body, you felt the warmth of Jaheira’s family around you. They had rallied to protect you without hesitation, and for the first time in a long time, you felt truly safe.
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Gale:
The cozy, labyrinthine aisles of Sorcerous Sundries stretched out around you, their shelves laden with ancient tomes and scrolls that hummed with latent magic. The scent of old parchment and ink filled the air, grounding and soothing. You and Gale had been immersed in your own quiet exploration, each lost in the treasure trove of knowledge. Every so often, you’d exchange a snippet of discovery—a passage here, a glyph there—but for the most part, it was a shared silence, warm and comfortable.
As your fingers trailed over the spine of a particularly aged tome, its title caught your eye: The Heart of Aetherial Bonds. Intrigued, you flipped it open and found a passage that immediately reminded you of Gale. The words were poetic, a reflection on the ties between love and magic, the way one could amplify the other. A small smile tugged at your lips. He would love this.
“Gale,” you called softly, tucking the book under your arm as you began to weave through the aisles, searching for him.
Your steps were light as you rounded a corner, spotting a familiar silhouette a few shelves away.
“There you are,” you began, but as the figure turned, the words died in your throat.
It wasn’t Gale.
Your blood ran cold as you recognized them—your ex. The person who had haunted your past, whose shadow you had thought you’d escaped. Their eyes lit up with a twisted glee, and before you could move, they stepped forward and grabbed your arm in an iron grip.
“I can’t believe it,” they said, their voice dripping with possessive satisfaction. “I’ve been searching for you, and here you are.”
“Let go of me,” you said firmly, trying to pull away. Their grip only tightened, the familiar pain radiating up your arm.
“You’re coming home,” they hissed, their tone leaving no room for argument.
Your heart pounded as you pushed against their hold, your voice shaking. “You’re hurting me—let go.”
But just as before, they didn’t listen. Their other hand reached to grip your shoulder, and for a moment, panic threatened to overwhelm you.
Then, the air shifted. A crackling sound filled the room, sharp and electric, like the air before a storm. A chill ran down your spine as the oppressive grip on your arm faltered. Both you and your ex turned toward the source of the energy.
Gale stood at the end of the aisle, his form illuminated by a pulsing, arcane light. His expression was unlike anything you had seen before—fierce, unyielding, his eyes glowing with a raw, dangerous power. Magic swirled around him, forming tendrils of energy that snapped and sparked against the air.
“Release them,” he said, his voice a low, commanding growl.
Your ex hesitated, their bravado wavering as the sheer intensity of Gale’s presence bore down on them.
“This isn’t your business, mage” they spat, but their voice lacked conviction.
“Oh, but it is,” Gale said, his hands lifting as the magic in the air intensified. “You’ve made it so.”
Before another word could be uttered, a blinding flash of energy erupted from Gale’s outstretched palms. The searing light enveloped your ex, their scream cut short as their form disintegrated into ash, leaving nothing behind but a faint, acrid scent and a smudge of dust on the floor. The magic dissipated as quickly as it had appeared, leaving the air still and silent.
Gale was at your side in an instant, his hands gently cradling your face as he looked you over.
“Are you hurt?” he asked, his voice soft now, filled with worry.
You shook your head, tears welling up as the adrenaline drained from your body.
“I—I’m okay,” you managed, your voice barely above a whisper. “Thank you.”
He pulled you into his arms, holding you close as the weight of what had just happened settled over you. The tension in your body melted as you buried your face in his chest, the faint scent of his robes and the comforting hum of his magic grounding you. Your shoulders shook as quiet sobs escaped, the fear and relief spilling out all at once.
“It’s over,” Gale murmured, his hand gently stroking your back. “You’re safe now. I won’t let anyone hurt you again.”
You clung to him, the sound of his heartbeat steady and calming against your ear. After a while, your tears slowed, and you pulled back just enough to look up at him. His face was a mixture of concern and quiet anger, his protective instincts still on high alert.
“I don’t know what I’d do without you,” you said, your voice trembling but sincere.
He smiled softly, brushing a stray tear from your cheek. “You’ll never have to find out.”
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Astarion:
The lively hum of the tavern wrapped around you like a familiar cloak, its warmth and noise a welcome respite from the chaos of adventuring. You sat at a corner table with Astarion, his sharp wit and flair for drama turning a mundane evening into something delightfully entertaining. Together, you exchanged hushed gossip about the other patrons—their fashion choices, their whispered secrets—and laughed at his outrageous commentary.
“Oh, look at him,” Astarion murmured, tilting his head toward a burly man near the bar, his tone dripping with mock seriousness. “I’d wager he’s had one too many pies—and just one too many wives, judging by that tan line on his ring finger.”
You snorted into your drink, shaking your head. “You’re incorrigible.”
“And yet, you adore me,” he said with a playful smirk. He lifted your glass with a flourish. “Speaking of adoration, I’ll be a dear and fetch you a refill. Don’t miss me too much.”
You grinned, watching as Astarion sashayed toward the bar, his charm radiating even in the simplest of tasks. Leaning back, you took a moment to enjoy the bustling atmosphere, but your peace shattered as a shadow fell over your table.
Your stomach churned as you turned to see your ex standing there, their presence as unwelcome as a dagger in the back. Without waiting for an invitation, they slid into Astarion’s vacated seat, their grin sending a chill down your spine.
“Well, well,” they said, leaning closer. “Fancy seeing you here.”
You stiffened, your pulse quickening. “Leave,” you said coldly, standing abruptly. “This isn’t the place, and I have nothing to say to you.”
But as you turned to leave, their hand shot out, grabbing a fistful of your hair and yanking you back with a cruel force. A sharp yelp escaped your lips as pain flared along your scalp.
“You think you can just walk away from me?” they snarled, their grip tightening. You tried to swing at them, but panic muddled your movements, and they easily avoided your weak attempts to break free. The room seemed to close in, the once-lively chatter of the tavern fading into a distant hum as fear took hold.
And then, just as suddenly, the pressure on your scalp vanished. You staggered forward, catching yourself on the edge of the table, and turned to see your ex frozen in place. A knife glinted at their throat, a thin line of blood already welling against the blade’s edge. Behind them stood Astarion, his expression icy and predatory.
“I’ve been dying for a fresh kill tonight,” Astarion purred, his voice dangerously low. “And it seems you’ve volunteered. How considerate.”
Your ex’s bravado crumbled as they began to stammer, their hands raised in shaky surrender. Astarion’s grip on the knife didn’t waver, his sharp eyes flicking to you.
“Darling,” he said, his tone almost conversational, “this one’s causing you trouble, isn’t he?”
You met his gaze, your scalp still throbbing but your heart swelling with gratitude. Nodding slowly, you gave him permission with a single, deliberate motion of your head.
Astarion’s smile widened, and he dragged your ex out of the tavern with an almost casual ease, ignoring their sputtered protests. The crowd parted instinctively, sensing the danger in his stride. You stayed behind, nursing your scalp and taking deep breaths to steady yourself. The minutes felt like hours, but eventually, Astarion returned, brushing off his hands as though he’d simply taken out the trash.
“All taken care of,” he said, his tone light as he reached for you, cupping your face gently. “Let me see—did they hurt you?”
“I’m fine,” you said, though your voice wavered slightly. “I—I could have handled it.”
Astarion raised an elegant eyebrow, his hand trailing down to rest on your shoulder.
“Oh, please, my love,” he said with mock exasperation. “You’re many things, but you’re not a liar. Let me have this one.”
You sighed, relenting. “Thank you, Astarion.”
He smiled softly, leaning in to press a kiss to your temple. “You’re welcome, darling. But seriously, are you okay? That brute—”
You interrupted him with a nod, placing a hand over his. “I am now. Because I’m with you.”
His expression softened, the predatory edge replaced by something tender.
“Always,” he murmured, his voice a promise. With a protective arm around your waist, he led you out of the tavern, away from the echoes of the past and into the safe haven of his presence.
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Wyll:
The ballroom of the Ulder Ravengard's estate was a vision of opulence. Crystal chandeliers cast shimmering light over marble floors polished to a mirror sheen. Noblemen and women in resplendent attire swayed to the music of a skilled orchestra, their laughter mingling with the hum of conversation. You and Wyll had been thoroughly enjoying yourselves, weaving through the room, gossiping about fashion choices and laughing at poorly-hidden flirtations among the elite.
Wyll, as always, moved with an effortless charm that drew people to him like moths to a flame. He introduced you to old friends, clinking glasses with ease, his laugh rich and genuine. His warmth was contagious, and you found yourself at ease in a social world that might have otherwise intimidated you. But when Wyll excused himself to chat with a group of friends near the wine table, you waved him off with a smile, happy to people-watch for a while.
A light tap on your shoulder pulled you from your thoughts. A hand reached out, beckoning you to the dance floor. You assumed it was a friend or an acquaintance and allowed yourself to be led. But as you turned, your stomach plummeted. Your blood ran cold.
It was them.
Your abusive ex stood before you, their grin as sharp and cruel as you remembered. It was a grin that promised pain masked under a veneer of charm. You instinctively tried to pull your hand away, but their grip only tightened, their fingers digging into your wrist.
“Don’t look so surprised,” they said smoothly, their voice low and venomous. “You didn’t think you could escape me forever, did you?”
“This isn’t the time or place,” you hissed, keeping your voice quiet to avoid drawing attention. “Let me go.”
“Oh, I don’t think so,” they replied, their grip tightening further as they began to lead you into a slow, swaying dance. Their tone was soft, deceptively sweet, but their eyes glinted with malice. “You owe me this much, at least. Don’t make a scene. Wouldn’t want to embarrass your fancy boyfriend or his oh-so-important father, would you?”
Your heart raced as they leaned in closer, their breath hot against your ear.
“You think you’ve moved on, don’t you? That you can just walk away from what we had? You’re mine, and you always will be.” You tried to twist out of their grip, panic rising in your chest.
“Let go of me,” you spat, your voice trembling despite your best efforts to stay composed.
Their smile only widened. “Oh I don’t think so,” they said, their voice dropping an octave. “You’re going to regret leaving me.”
You braced yourself, half-expecting them to lash out. Your eyes squeezed shut as you prepared for a blow that never came. Instead, a loud, sickening crack echoed through the ballroom, followed by gasps from nearby guests.
Opening your eyes, you saw your ex sprawled on the polished floor, clutching their face. Blood gushed from their nose, staining their pristine clothing. Standing over them, his posture rigid with fury, was Wyll. His usual easygoing demeanor was gone, replaced by a simmering rage that made the air around him feel electric.
“Touch them again,” Wyll growled, his voice low and deadly, “and a broken nose will be the least of your worries.”
Your ex scrambled backward on the floor, their bravado shattered as they stared up at Wyll in terror. Before they could say anything, a pair of Flaming Fist guards appeared, having been alerted by the commotion. Wyll waved them over, his eyes never leaving your ex.
“Take them,” Wyll ordered, his voice firm. “They’re disturbing the peace.”
The guards didn’t hesitate. They grabbed your ex by the arms and hauled them to their feet, ignoring their sputtering protests and threats. As they dragged your ex away, Wyll finally turned to you, his expression softening in an instant.
“Are you alright, love?” he asked gently, stepping closer to cup your face in his hands. His warm brown eyes scanned you for any sign of injury.
“I’m fine,” you managed to say, though your voice was shaky. “Wyll, I’m so sorry—I didn’t mean to cause a scene—”
“Stop,” he interrupted, shaking his head. “You don’t need to apologize. This isn’t on you.”
The weight of his words, the sincerity in his voice, brought tears to your eyes. He pulled you into a tight embrace, his hand cradling the back of your head as he whispered soothing words into your ear. The rest of the ballroom seemed to fade away, leaving only the comforting warmth of his presence.
When you finally pulled back, he brushed a stray tear from your cheek and gave you a small, reassuring smile. “You’re safe now. That’s all that matters.”
You nodded, your breath evening out as the panic subsided. “Thank you, Wyll.”
He kissed your forehead tenderly before taking your hand in his.
“Come, my love,” he said, his voice returning to its usual warmth. “Let’s get you a fresh drink. We’ve both earned it tonight.”
And with that, he led you away from the gawking crowd, his protective arm wrapped securely around you, a silent promise that no harm would come to you as long as he was by your side.
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Halsin:
The forest was tranquil, the golden light of the afternoon filtering through the dense canopy of leaves. You moved between patches of wildflowers, humming a tune as you gathered handfuls of blooms for the orphans back at the grove. The air was sweet with the scent of flowers and moss, and for a time, you felt entirely at peace.
Your basket was nearly full when a faint rustling behind you caught your attention. You paused, glancing over your shoulder, but the forest appeared empty. Shrugging it off as a rabbit or some other harmless creature, you bent down to pluck a cluster of bright yellow flowers. You didn’t notice the shaggy, wiry wolf stalking closer, its pale eyes fixed on you with an unsettling intensity.
Suddenly, the wolf sprang from the underbrush, a blur of fur and teeth. You gasped as it collided with you, the force of the pounce knocking you to the ground. Its heavy paws pinned you to the forest floor, the breath driven from your lungs as you struggled beneath its weight.
Before you could scream, the wolf began to shift. Fur melted into skin, limbs elongated, and in moments, you were staring into the face of your abusive ex. The recognition hit you like a blow to the chest, your blood running cold.
“You,” you breathed, horrified, and immediately began to struggle.
They leaned closer, their wild eyes gleaming with an unnerving fervor.
“Did you miss me, darling?” they crooned, their voice dripping with mock affection. “I’ve missed you so much. I couldn’t let you go, not like that.”
“Get off me!” you snapped, shoving at their chest with all your strength. Your heart pounded as you tried to call for help, but their hand clamped over your mouth, silencing you.
“Shh,” they whispered, their grin twisting into something darker. “Don’t make this difficult. You’re mine. You’ve always been mine.”
Panic surged through you, and you did the only thing you could think of—you bit down hard on the palm of their hand. They hissed in pain but didn’t flinch away, instead smirking as if they found your resistance amusing.
“Still feisty,” they murmured, their tone infuriatingly condescending. “I’ve always loved that about—”
Their words were cut off by a deafening roar, a deep, guttural sound that reverberated through the forest. A massive brown bear charged out of the trees, barreling into your ex with bone-crushing force. The impact sent them flying, their body slamming into the trunk of a tree with a sickening thud.
The bear was relentless. Your ex shifted back into their wolf form, snarling as they tried to defend themselves, but they were no match for the sheer ferocity of Halsin. His claws tore through fur and flesh with savage precision, his roar echoing through the woods as he drove your ex deeper into retreat. When the wolf finally lay broken and bloodied, it whimpered and slunk away, disappearing into the underbrush.
Halsin remained in bear form for a moment longer, his massive chest heaving as he watched the wolf flee. Only when he was certain the threat was gone did he shift back, his towering frame immediately rushing to your side.
“You’re hurt,” he said urgently, dropping to his knees and cradling your face in his large hands. His amber eyes scanned you for injuries, his expression a mixture of worry and fury. “What did they do to you?”
“I’m okay,” you said, your voice trembling as the adrenaline began to fade. “I’m just… shaken up.”
His arms wrapped around you, pulling you close. His embrace was almost crushing, but you didn’t mind—you needed the grounding warmth of his presence as much as he needed the reassurance that you were safe. You buried your face against his chest, clinging to him as your body trembled.
“I should have been here sooner,” Halsin murmured, pressing a kiss to your temple, then your forehead. “I’ll never let anything like this happen to you again.”
You rested your head against his chest, letting his warmth and steady presence soothe your frayed nerves. “You were here when I needed you,” you reassured him. “That’s all that matters.”
Halsin pressed a kiss to the top of your head, his breath warm against your hair. He didn’t let go, and you didn’t ask him to. In that moment, being in his arms was the safest place in the world.
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[If you or anyone that you know of has experienced behaviors like this please do not hesitate to contact your local authority]
oof that was a bit of a heavy one but i hope you guys enjoyed it - Seluney xox
If you want to support me in other ways | Help keep this moonmaiden caffeinated x
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ghosts-and-blue-sweaters · 2 years ago
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OH MY GOSH OKAY THIS IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE ART PIECES I HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR IT FOR SO HEKKIN LONG OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH
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100 acre server
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differentnerddiplomatopera · 3 months ago
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incorrect Odydiopen quotes
Odysseus: I’m not casual, I will kill us both. Just a reminder.
Odysseus: What do you mean killing is not an act of devotion?
Odysseus: Gas? I lit that. Gate? I kept that. Girl? I boss that
Penelope: He couldn’t even if he tried.
Penelope: “I could fix him” actually my type of man is the one who commits atrocities in the name of love
Odysseus to Palamedes: if you ever disrespect me, and I was chill about that, your death day draws nigh.
Odysseus: forgive and forget? Hell no, resent and remember 
Penelope: When I go out in public, do people look at me like “omg that girl is so pretty and normal?”
Odysseus: Absolutely
Penelope: Good, the facade still works
Odysseus to Diomedes: Choke me sexually or lethally, I don’t have a preference 
Penelope: I got too excited while playing chess and told my opponent that I was going to slit his throat and slaughter him like a hog. Something to work on for next time.
Odysseus to Diomedes: it is not enough for you to simply be gay for us to build intimacy together; you must also beat me in a game of wits
Telemachus: Father, what is dad doing?
Diomedes: we’re making your dad do a mating dance to do something 
Telemachus: oh? What is he trying to do?
Diomedes: well he is-
Penelope: NOOOOO-NO-NO-NO NO
Diomedes:…..
Telemachus:……
Penelope: Baby I know you can be dense sometimes, so I gotta stop you
Odysseus: can I quit now?
Penelope: Once I heard Diomedes ask Odysseus if something was safe and Odysseus said probably.
Penelope: I have never moved from one room to the other so fast in my entire life.
Diomedes: I am so glad to sleep in an actual bed,
Penelope: (joking) what, were the tent’s that bad?
Diomedes: OMG, let me tell you. Odysseus used to set up alarm systems in our tent today to alert us of people’s presence. Athena forbid, I try to piss, and Odysseus tries to stab me.
Penelope: …
Diomedes: Yeah, the war with your husband was really fucking fun.
Penelope: (snickering)
Diomedes: Oh my- I’m leaving.
Penelope: (Cackling) wait no I’m sorry, come back! 
Young Penelope: I want two boyfriends, and I want the boyfriends to be boyfriends & and I want to be their girlfriend & and I want the boyfriends to take me out on little boyfriend dates where we’re all boyfriends and girlfriend.
Older Penelope: Fucking yessssssssss, let’s gooooooo!
Diomedes: you guys really ruined my plans to brood for the rest of my life and be angsty and sad.
Odysseus and Penelope: (kissing him) yOuR WeLcOMe!!
Odysseus: Penelope, when in the midst of the war, I laid with Diomedes.
Penelope: Boy, if you don’t spill the tea right the fuck now
Odysseus: Bitchhhhh, I got you
Penelope: I need details, be very descriptive 
Odysseus: Ok so, when he-
Penelope: Hey, you wanna bring things up to the bedroom?
Diomedes: Sure…what’s up there?
Odysseus: By the way did you bring protection?
Diomedes: *wielding his dagger* WHY WHAT’S UP THERE?!?
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kellyvela · 4 months ago
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Sophie confirmed she's shooting The Dreadful next!!!! I'm soo excited <3
YESSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!
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It's from this interview for BBC Radio 1's Screen Time:
Here is a transcript from minute 22:45 onwards:
Radio 1's Screen Time: All right, let me wrap up with a classic end, What is next? What are you gonna do next? When will we see you next? What are you currently working on?
Sophie Turner: I just wrapped yesterday a show for Amazon Prime called HAVEN, which is another heist show, but set in modern day, but the stakes are a lot higher, it's a 4 Billion pounds at stake here. [ . . . ]
Sophie Turner: So that's coming up next, which is gonna be really fun. And then I've got a movie coming out called TRUST, I don't know when sometime next year, which is like a horror thriller. And then I'm shooting a movie with my good old buddy Kit Harington.
Radio 1's Screen Time: I've heard of him.
Sophie Turner: I've heard of him. Isn't he the hairy short one.
Radio 1's Screen Time: I was gonna say, isn't he the bloke with the big beard now?
Sophie Turner: Yeah
Radio 1's Screen Time: He's gonna be in INDUSTRY soon.
Sophie Turner: Yeah, I think it's already out, isn't it?
Radio 1's Screen Time: In the US.
Sophie Turner: Ohhhh.
Radio 1's Screen Time: Which we hate.
Sophie Turner: Which we hate.
Radio 1's Screen Time: So we now have to wait until October when is out on BBC.
Sophie Turner: Oh my God, why so long?
Radio 1's Screen Time: Because it's nice to wait for things that are good.
Sophie Turner: Yeah, exactly.
~~~
It's a shame the interviewer deviated to INDUSTRY, instead of keep talking about her next project with Kit.
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allastoredeer · 10 months ago
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Just had a hilarious thought.
Yes, Alastor is attracted to power. But his coming to that realization was not prompted by Lucifer or even Vox.
It was seeing Zestial!
Imagine: He first arrives in Hell, and he's still building up for his big reveal, and then sees Zestial putting on some impressive power display and was like: Oh.
Z was his first aesthetic crush. Thankfully a passing one, but it explains why he respects him so much.
It puts a whole new spin on his reaction to Zestial appearing in front of him on the street in Episode 3. Then his immediate order for the EggBois to shush, despite barely tolerating them before. "Shut up, he needs to think I'm cool."
Okay, okay, okay, I got, like, 3 messages side by side the other day (including this one), that involves Vox as well, and I've been super sick the last few days, so I read this in my migraine, dehydrated addled state and cooked up an entire backstory with Alastor and Vox, which includes Alastor's attraction to power (and his previous attraction to Zestial), and his falling out with Vox, and why they are what they are, and Velvette was in there somewhere, but now that I'm not longer sick I only have fragments of that glorious, complex, multi-faceted, super emotionally charged relationship, and I'm pretty sure most of it spawned from this.
That's all to say, I am so so SO fucking on board with Alastor's first crush being Zestial because when I watched episode three when it aired, and saw them interact, my first thought was "I ship it."
Literally, I shipped Alastor/Zestial before StaticRadio or AppleRadio. Alestial was my first Hazbin ship 😂 So this is just dasdfjlnsaklfjna YESSSSSSSSSS
"Shut up, he needs to think I'm cool." It's okay, Alastor. Zestial thinks your the coolest. Your the most entertaining Overlord on the block. He told me himself.
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ghosts-and-blue-sweaters · 2 years ago
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Hi I'm here to say thank you for always leaving such lovely and excited tags on my posts! I'm always excited to see what you have to say, and I appreciate you doing that a lot!
Awww, of course! :D It’s really fun for me to ramble in the tags alsgaksgaka and it makes me so happy that you notice them!!
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arcane-vagabond · 6 months ago
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yes because if you think this man would fumble a proposal wait till you hear his VOWS. no way would he do it infront of y’all’s very small wedding, it would be a non negotiable to have a private reading beforehand. theyd be blunt and a little awkwardly worded but theyre so honest and full of love that its a little shocking he would ever admit those things, nonetheless write them down.
Yessssssssss!! You two would have such a small ceremony. Really, I think it would probably be a spur of the moment type of affair where the two of you just go on down to the courthouse with two witnesses and get hitched. Nobody even realizes y'all are married at first.
I think it would be Javi who sees the rings first and points it out like "Yo, what is THAT on your fingers?" And the two of you aren't exactly trying to hide it, so you just kind of shrug and go "Oh these? Yeah, we got married the other week."
And everyone is just standing around looking at each other like "????????? ?? ???"
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