#oh yeah what are the warnings

[egophiliac]

Are you okay with spam likes/reblogs or do you find them annoying?

honestly, seeing a solid row of likes/reblogs from the same person makes me imagine them going through my art like it's some kind of delectable buffet, holding a giant plate and going "hmm, yes, a little of this...some of that...ooh, and can't forget this..." except, you know, on the internet. with the feeling of that one Tom Hanks gif.

(which is to say, of course it's fine! if it starts taking over my activity page I just use the filters, so no worries :D)

[loneycorner]

Blood/gore warning, stabbing(?)

"It's what they all say"

[blaintism]

[starwikia]

suicide cw

look i have been in this area before mentally. it sucks and i wouldn’t wish this on anyone. but, and this is going to sound callous, but i don’t feel any sympathy for james somerton. even if i hope he’s like. not dead. But thats all the amount of goodwill im willing to give him. The more i think about this really, the more angry i am. 

ngl this entire situation is another example of how white people weaponize their mental illness to avoid consequences. Im seeing it in real time.

this man has a continuous habit of using self-harm as a get-out-of-jail-for-free card. in both of his apologies, he has worded his supposed attempts in ways that were clearly meant to guilt people who displayed his plagiarism and overall horrendous history of racism and misogyny. i say supposed because, while i’m not saying those are lies and this would he such a fucked up thing to lie about that i don’t want to think he has, unfortunately, it’s been proven again and again that his word can’t be trusted, as he’s known to lie to try get out of consequences. Hes a proven liar. him lying about this is actually the best case scenario, because no one should go through this entire situation, wouldnt wish this on anyone, but you can only do this so often before people stop sympathizing with you. is this callous? Yeah, but like. I’m actually fucking angry he cant straight up take no as an answer. that this is how he reacts realizing he cant be one of the Cool Kidz™️ on youtube anymore. he acts like he DESERVES a career, like its not a privilege hes lost due to his own actions.

He lied about apologizing and forgiving people, he lied about giving the money to hbomberguy to give to ppl he ripped off (yknow, instead of doing it himself), he lied about the jessie gender situation and rewrote the narrative to make it so he isnt the bad guy, and hes the victim all along actually!

you can’t tell me that supposed last message of his isn’t meant to be a 13 reasons why esq attempt to deflect the blame “look i’m going to kill myself and it’s all YOUR PEOPLES FAULT for not letting me achieve my DREAM of being filmmaker IN PEACE!!! I just wanted Nick’s (the guy who I have thrown under the bus again and again) portfolio up!! Im just being a good friend dont you all FEEL BAD” he refuses to take ANY ACCOUNTABILITY of any of his actions and he IS STILL trying to shove the blame over to other people again.

it’s also pretty ironic people are like “uhhh well hbomber’s fans harassed him!!!” like hbomber outright told people NOT to HARASS JAMES!!! ALSO acting as if james doesn’t have a very real documented history of STRAIGHT UP sending his fans to harass and threaten smaller creators, more notably women, trans, and bipoc creators. especially after he’s stolen typically very personal anecdotes so he could profit from them. so why can he do it but the second people are like “hey this guys an actual piece of shit.” and he can’t handle it suddenly people are trying to white knight his shit? like no he doesn’t get that. he doesn’t get that at all just because he couldn’t handle the consequences of his actions. 

what? were supposed to stay quiet about a man profiting off of other minorities because he wanted to be the spokesman for all gay people? people tried to solve this on a smaller, more private scales for YEARS and he kept doing it. it was clear that the giant public video was the ONLY way to get people to notice. HE WOULDVE GOTTEN AWAY WITH STEALING 87 FUCKING THOUSANDS WORTH OF DOLLARS. HE CANT HANDLE THE FACT HE CANT GET AWAY WITH IT. 

am i supposed to feel bad for the guy who basically threatened a trans woman with the police? i don’t care what anyone says, it’s so fucking obvious that he threatened jessie by implying he was getting the police involved in their conflict. what am i supposed to act like that didn’t happen? are we supposed to pretend like he didn’t glorify nazi’s and outright said that gay people made up a good chunk of the nazis? That he didnt say america joined ww2 bc they were jealous of the NAZIS. WHAT WOULD POSSESS YOU TO FUCKING SAY THAT. but then? He gives women (not even women most of the time, he misgenders nonbinary ppl constantly) shit for writing mlm. are we supposed to act like he doesn’t straight-up sees himself superior and better than people of color and steals their works to put himself on a pedestal? Are we supposed to act like he didnt spit on our elders by saying “only the boring gays survived aids” like man! Fuck you! He BLANTANTLY MAKES UP HISTORY TO PUT HIMSELF ON A PEDESTAL!! HE ACTIVELY TRIED TO REWRITE LGBT HISTORY TO SUIT HIS FUCKED UP NARRATIVES!

yes this sucks ! no one deserves this but no one should be making him a martyr. Thats what he fucking WANTS! He wants to be immortalized as a victim!! (again, supposedly, it was reported hes alive but its not confirmed).

The shit he got isnt near the amount of fucking callous behavior hes done again and again. Again, to drill this point, EVEN IF HE DIDNT CALL THE POLICE HE THREATENED A TRANS WOMAN INTO THINKING HE DID!!! The fact he tried to use a head injury to justify years of the outright ghoulish shit fucking astounds me. Why the fuck did anyone in his life thought it was a good idea to let him TRY to come back. in the end, he had options. he didn’t need to try to make a comeback. HE DIDNT NEED TO FUCKING LIE OR IGNORE THE SHIT HE WAS CALLED OUT ON the reality is, he wanted to come back thinking he could shove it under the rug, was told that no dude, you’re not allowed to be a youtuber anymore. you’re done. you need to move on and went full nuclear. it’s not on anyone’s hands but his own. HES BEEN DOING THIS TO HIMSELF!! But nah man we cant call his shit out bc hell may or may not kill himself. Fuck the other minorities who have the same issues but worse and sometimes BECAUSE of him. This is going to SUCKKKK so bad when other ppl, specifically white gays, are going to weaponize this shit to get away with their stuff.

[only-one-brain-cell]

“None of which we had access to for security.” Oh really? Then how the fuck was JJ able to play Scrabble with her then?????

[billiuspendragon]

Okay I'm kinda talking out my ass/projecting my own autism onto Saiki here but:

Though Saiki is an unreliable narrator and truly loves his friends, I think some of his resentment over hanging out with them is real, and I can understand it.

I am a person who can readily admit I love my friends, and I do like to socialise, but I need plenty of warning beforehand and time to recuperate afterwards, because socialising takes effort. When I'm invited to do something or hang out with friends, I almost always feel a shadow of resentment about it - even if it's a thing I want to do and with people I like. It still feels like I'm losing out on a day of doing jack-shit. Cancelling on doing jack-shit is still cancelling on plans, even if those plans were just "wake up, write fanfiction, draw pictures, etc." and it throws me off. I feel like I can't enjoy spending time with my friends unless I give myself time to get excited about it, and if it happens too suddenly I find myself shutting down or floating away a bit.

Now, if we look at Saiki, who's friendship with all these people was pretty much built on these kinds of interactions, and add those to his deep-rooted belief that he doesn't deserve friends, that resentment and anxiety must be even more strong. I think the fact that Saiki obviously grows to care for his friends really shows his deep desire for connection, even more so if we go with the interpretation that some of his negative feelings about them are real.

My point with this ramble isn't to say "Saiki really does find the others annoying and therefore doesn't like them" but rather the opposite. On some level, Saiki is "tolerating" being out of his comfort zone, but the fact that he's willing to do this for his friends shows that he really does care about them.

[revvywevvy]

dont u just hate it when u and bro are plotting but then some expendable starts flashing u w/ their beacon AND they have the gall to scratch u up when u try to shut that shit down so you have to blow their head off like UGH the nerve of some people amirite

{ zoom and bonus under cut }

{ Bonus }

[solplease]

OH WHAT THE FUCK. WHAT THE FUCK

[helixx2]

gonna be posting my art here now starting with this goober. hello dunmeshi tumblr

[anghraine]

My best friend and I moved in together with his closest friend from his MA program, and while I had met her before (the friend; my bff is a man), we hadn't spent much time together because I've never lived away from the West Coast (and only two years out of the PNW) and she's never lived outside of North Carolina and only briefly visited the PNW once, when she went to Portland last year.

It's been a delight to show her around the PNW and realize we need to explain things that are just sort of omnipresent in our lives. The bff and I were casually griping with each other about having to run an errand to Trader Joe's at an inconvenient hour, and were telling her, "it's okay, you can stay in the car and avoid the people if you want" and she was like "NO I MUST SEE IT, I'VE ONLY HEARD OF THEM" and nearly ascended to another plane when we showed her around the store.

The bff and I grew up in the same town in NW Washington (him for his first 18 years, me from 9 to 19) and he lived in Bellingham and Seattle for years before he went to NC for grad school (I went to the SF Bay Area for mine, a very different experience). Both of them are hardcore coffee aficionados, but he struggled with the different Coffee Ways of the South, so for the true PNW experience they want to tour various indie coffeeshops next.

Also, she adores Kaidan in Mass Effect and we were like, oh, is your passport up to date? We could take a trip sometime and show you your boyfriend's beloved English Bay. It's very beautiful :)

her: O_O

me: Actually, it's worth going to Vancouver BC for its own sake as well, it's truly spectacular. We used to go all the time as kids.

bff: And Victoria!

her: O_O

[todayisafridaynight]

laugh with me while i make my own posts real

tha fuckin outfits under the cut

[v-tired-queer]

In a weird way, I miss how my mom made me feel normal. It was a lot easier for me to regulate my emotions when she was here--she was someone I could talk to no matter what and she helped me work through my feelings, both good and bad. Sometimes even indifferent. She helped me identify what I was feeling, always let me talk it through, and never made me feel bad for needing breaks from certain things or people when things get to be too much. She even helped me understand what others were feeling or needed.

⚠️ TW: self harm behavior in the next paragraph

When I was younger, I used to hit myself on my thighs when I was overly frustrated or overstimulated. Since going to therapy after I got older, I learned better coping mechanisms and learned to identify when I need time away from sounds, sights, touch and smells and other people in general to calm down before I get so overwhelmed. But since Mom passed I haven't been able to get those breaks that I need, and people have been confusing me and frustrating me and I had a moment where without even thinking, I bit my lip, screamed into the bite, and hit my thighs like I used to, and I'm really upset that it came to that. Unfortunately, it feels like it helped, but at the same time, no it didn't.

⚠️ TW over

I'm just feeling really broken and lost. With my mom here, I never really noticed how much I struggle to communicate with others face-to-face. I've had countless moments these last few weeks where fellow human beings have left me utterly confused and frustrated. Mom was great at specifying exactly what she was trying to communicate to me, but the other people I live with aren't.

Long story short, emotional regulation is hard, people are confusing at best and frustrating at worst, I'm feeling more broken than ever, and for God sakes I just want a very, very quiet nap in a very, very dark room, preferably with my comfort objects and away from the rest of humanity.

[viscerax]

Hiiii may i get some brim angst🙏🙏

From the day Brian went missing, Tim's life went crashing down around him. Brian. Brian, his friend on the outside, secret boyfriend behind closed doors. Turns out, its not exactly easy to be openly gay when you're in the south. (Not like either of them didn't know that already. Brian grew up in the deep south. Any hint at femininity or flamboyance in a man and they were sent away to church camp where only God can save them.

But that was okay with Tim. He was okay with keeping his relationship a secret. Because Brian knew. And Brian was the only one that Tim needed to know. )

But when Brian went missing, no phone call, no text, not even a God damned note, Tim's life came crashing down. His other friends were limited to Brian's friends, and he had an itching feeling in his mind that they didn't really like 'his type'. (What did that even mean? Shy, dark, brooding, snappy at times? Could they all tell he was secretly gay? Oh god-)

Even Jay, who seemed awfully nice to Tim, someone he wouldn't mind getting to know, no, even his face fell into the blur of memories as he buzzed about his life. Pretending like it'll be okay.

(Everything is fine.)

Tim tries his best to forget about Brian. But he can't. Tim wishes those pesky memory issues would kick in and wipe that stupid smiling face out of his mind, but it won't, and he can't forget. Whether for himself or for Brian, he's not sure.

(Probably both. Because, if he forgets Brian, then he forgets that anyone's ever truly loved him. That anyone's ever seen him at his best, his worst, and even when he's not himself, and still managed to love him. If he forgets Brian, he forgets that there's anything worth living for.)

So Tim does his best. He looks and looks but he can't find him. Eventually he has to return to work, to school. He can't let life knock him out while he's already down and reeling from the loss of his closest companion. He does his best, and he prays that it's enough. Enough that Brian would be proud of him. Proud that he kept going. Proud that he never forgot him.

The days blurred. They blurred more and more. Memories become murky until he even doubts his memories of Brian. If it weren't for the countless voice-mails from Brian (that Tim saved in preparation for something exactly like this,) Tim mightve even forgotten what his voice sounded like. But no. He can't forget. He has to remember.

(...remember... remember.... memory. what a funny thing.)

And the days blur into a smoke, so much resembling the clouds of smoke he pushes past his lips, and he would laugh at the comparison, if he laughed at much of anything these days.

And then suddenly its 3 years. And Tim is celebrating Brian's birthday alone. Because he can't forget. Can't possibly forget that it's a day to be celebrated. Can't forget its significance or why its so important or why he needs to eat cake on this day. (Wait... who's birthday is it? No no, he needs to remember...)

Memories stop becoming blurry when Jay shows up. Jay feels familiar, like there's a memory of him somewhere in there, but he can't possibly make out his face besides a few faint memories of filming for that cursed film. That film that mightve been how he infected everyone. How he infected Brian and-

(No. No. He didn't infect Brian. He couldn't have. Nope. No way.)

And then suddenly Jay is leaking his medical records online, and he can't possibly care to search his memories for a sympathetic moment from him before he's punching him in the middle of a parking lot. To be fair it was kind of deserved.

The days continued to blur and merge, save for the few distinct memories he has of being with Jay. Arguing with him, late nights in hotel rooms, having conversations that would never be heard by another ear, Jay laying down his deepest confessions as if he somehow knew his fate.

Memories come flooding back like a cracked dam when he sees that audition tape from years back. He can finally remember. Remember auditioning, remember filming on hot days, watching Alex yell at everyone for far too long. But most of all, he remembers Brian. Memories coming back like hot flashes and suddenly he can't breath, not because of the intense memories, but because he's making a realization.

That was Brian. Brian was the masked man behind ToTheArk. He watched Brian die and he didn't even know. He watched one of his only friends fall to their death, and he didn't even know.

He didn't know.

But he knew now. He knew that was Brian. That same exact hoodie, and God, who else could it be?

Tim can't breath. He can't feel himself moving as he practically trips over himself and empties whatever contents left in his body into his toilet because it's all just so much.

Brian was dead. He was dead and he wasn't coming back.

[theres-whump-in-that-nebula]

JoJo Siwa doesn’t deserve all the hate (and homophobia) she’s getting for her style and music; but she does deserve scrutiny for defending Colleen Ballinger and being both active and complicit in abuse that happened on her TV show. Like the girl has been under the public eye in unhealthy environments all her life; cut her some slack — not too much; she’s still a responsible adult — but if you’re going to dogpile her, then at least dogpile her for the right reasons. Jesus Fucking Christ.

[retconomics]

babygirl you are my EVERYTHINg..!!.,1!1!

[dawnthefluffyduck]

Doodles while watching my dad play a game