#oh yeah my wife went missing months or years ago n I finally chased her down to a fuckin mansion

[cherrysnax]

I just be in situations and honestly I think it’s cause I’m unemployed

[barrysjumpsuit]

the killing in kildare - an outer banks/criminal minds crossover (jj pov)

this came to be thanks to a post by @pixelated-pogues and @poguesoftheobx and tbh my main motivation for this was jj being an asshole to feds

word count: 3k

warnings: mentions of (canon) abuse, some abuse/fighting, mentions of canon murder, this is purely unedited so prob typos and bad grammar idc

summary: following the murder of sherriff peterkin, our favorite BAU team comes in to assist the kildare county police department with their case

a/n: i hate this and rewrote it twice, but here ya go!!! couldn’t make it a true criminal minds bau type case due to the canon but i did my best. also there’s mayward if u squint

---

“We haven’t had a homicide here in ten years,” Deputy Shoupe was explaining as he led the BAU team through the police station. “All sorts of weird shit going down lately. We’re at our wits end.”

“And all this happened after Routledge’s disappearance?” Agent Hotchner asked, weaving his way through desks as Shoupe unlocked the conference room door. 

“Yes sir, his kid - also John Routledge, we call him John B - thought he’s out there, but we’ve officially deemed him dead after he didn’t show up after a couple months, now the kid says a local killed him. Have a seat.”

Shoupe gestured to the chairs surrounding the table, and the team sat down, Hotchner and Rossi near the head of the table. They all listened while Shoupe explained what went down over the course of the past year - Big John’s disappearance, which turned out to be linked to his hunt for the gold of the Royal Merchant. Word had it that a man named Ward Cameron, the elite of the island, was responsible, or at least involved. “That statement came from Routledge’s kid, so I’m not sure how true it is,” Shoupe explained. 

Turns out, Shoupe believed it was the younger Routledge who murdered Sheriff Peterkin. A local reported him running around, covered in blood. He had become involved in the treasure hunt with his friends, wreaking havoc around the island in the process. There were strange men who reportedly chased the kids, who later turned up dead in someone’s nets, sporting wounds from a gaff hook.

“And now Pete…” Shoupe continued, trailing off. “That kid’s on the loose. We haven’t seen or heard anything about him in a few days. We think he got away, but I still have officers out keeping an eye open.”

It wasn’t the type of case the BAU would normally take on, but it was interesting. A hunt for treasure, mysterious men and local residents turning up dead, and the murder of the Sheriff.

There were a few questions and a brief silence as the team looked over the photos and files they had been given. Morgan finally spoke up, his voice filled with determination. “We’ll find whoever did this.”

--

JJ laid on the dock, swinging his feet which dangled off the edge. The tips of his boots barely skimmed the water. In one hand, he pinched a joint between two fingers. His eyes were closed, and occasionally he sucked on the joint, enjoying the calmness that overwhelmed his system, easing the anxiety that had been overwhelming ever since he saw John B disappear the night before.

They had finally eased off the search once there was word of his escape. He was out of Kildare County, out of jurisdiction. 

With no more cops hanging around, JJ could finally return to the Chateau. He knew he couldn’t go home - his dad had probably realized that JJ had stolen the keys to the Phantom by now, and JJ would be a goner. Being at the Chateau was familiar and comfortable.

Both Kiara and Pope had returned home to be with their families. Ever since two nights before, JJ had been at the Chateau, Kiara having dropped off food from The Wreck to last him a few days.

JJ was too caught up in his thoughts to hear the footsteps making their way down the dock until someone spoke. “JJ Maybank?”

He knew the voice of a cop when he heard it; JJ bolted upright, immediately jumping into the water, his joint long forgotten as he plunged under the water and started swimming.

Arms suddenly wrestled him. “We just want to talk, kid,” someone said, and JJ threw an elbow their way. Whoever had jumped in and grabbed him was too big, and wrestled him back to the dock. “Grab him, Spence.”

Hands pulled JJ back onto the dock. “You’re not in any trouble, JJ.”

JJ struggled in his hold, but more hands were on him, and he knew he couldn’t get away.

“Alright, you got me, congratulations,” he said, throwing his hands up. “John B didn’t kill Peterkin, he didn’t kill anybody.”

“Hold up, kid,” the first man said. JJ saw that they weren’t dressed like normal cops, and the man soon confirmed his suspicions. “My name is Derek Morgan, this is Spencer Reid, we’re with the FBI. We just have a few questions.”

“Ask away,” JJ said, exasperated. He was cornered on the end of the dock by the two agents.

“We’d like you to come with us,” Agent Reid explained. “To take an official statement. You won’t get in any trouble and you’ll be able to leave whenever you want.”

“If your friend is innocent, we want to help him, all right? That’s what we’re here for.”

Maybe it was the weed, or maybe it was the fact that John B was gone and safe. Whatever the case, JJ nodded, allowing the agents to walk him to their SUV to take him back to the police station. He was more than aware of all the looks everyone gave him. JJ greeted them, in typical JJ fashion, and he was brought into an office.

A blonde woman was sitting at the conference table, papers and files spread out before her while she spoke on the phone. JJ recognized the photos of the two square groupers that were killed, hauled up in nets by some fishermen. His stomach turned at the memory of them breaking into John B’s house. 

The agent set the phone down onto the table before sticking out her hand. “My name’s Jennifer Jareau, but you can call me JJ. You’re a friend of John B’s?”

JJ laughed. “JJ, that’s a good name, I like it.” He smiled with satisfaction as Jennifer’s face flushed red. “Look at that, we even look alike, we’re both blond bombshells.” 

“This is JJ Maybank,” Agent Morgan interjected, a smile tugging on his lips, too. 

“Well, all right, JJ. Can you tell us what happened? From the beginning? We found that the officers here tended to have a… biased report, so sorry about that.” Her eyes shifted slowly towards Deputy Shoupe.

“Nah, it’s all good. I have a bit of a reputation here, so that doesn’t surprise me.” JJ couldn’t help but throw a wink towards Shoupe. “Ol’ Shoupe and I here know each other pretty well.”

There was a pang of satisfaction inside JJ as Shoupe sighed. “Just shut up and talk, Maybank.”

“Aight. So, JB’s dad was looking for this gold his whole life, ya know? He went missing at sea about a year ago. Then this month, after Agatha, my friends and I were out fishing and we found a sunk boat. It belonged to Scooter Grubbs, and we were like ‘oh, how did he get his grubby little hands on it?’” he paused, clearly proud of the joke he made. “Anyway. Scooter turned up dead and we found a compass in the boat. It was JB’s dad’s. So we were like ‘holy shit, it’s a ghost compass’. But after we found that compass we were chased by some guys, total square groupers - they tried to shoot us! Then they next day we went to ask Scooter’s wife about it but found the guys there, then they came to JB’s house looking for him and the compass. Then we found a map and tape recorder to John B from his dad in this creepy ass tomb the compass told us to go to, and we knew something was up.”

JJ paused for dramatic effect. Everyone, even Shoupe, was watching and listening intently, Jennifer scribbling down notes as a tape recorder played on the table. Agent Morgan was visibly amused by JJ’s storytelling.

He continued with the story. “So we found the shipwreck, right? But there wasn’t anything on it. So we were like damn, someone beat us to it. But then John B started mackin’ Sarah Cameron-”

Agent Reid made a confused face at his slang.

“Mackin’. You know, making out, dating, Sarah Cameron. Turns out, there was a letter left by Denmark Tanney. He was the sole survivor and hid all the gold at the Crain house. But this is where it gets good,” JJ said, leaning forward, as if the story wasn’t thrilling enough already. “Ward Cameron must have known that John B was looking for the gold. He had him move into his house and must have overheard him talking to Sarah about the gold. The gold was gone. Ward loaded it up in his plane. While this was happening, John B went to Lana, Scooter’s wife, and she told him everything. About how Big John and Ward were looking for the gold, and they were about to find the merchant, then Ward shoved John and split his head open and dumped him over the side of the boat.”

“We have agents talking to Lana Grubbs right now,” Jennifer said, and JJ nodded vigorously.

“Good. Oh yeah, JB said Ward took him fishing and tried to kill him with a gaff hook. That ring any bells?” JJ looked from Morgan to Reid, and then to Jennifer, who just nodded. “So turns out Scooter found his body and got the compass. Then he was coming back when Aggie hit. After JB found out, he was pissed, man, and we went to the runway to stop Ward from stealing the gold. He was taking it and Sarah to the Bahamas. JB went out to try to stop him. He said Peterkin showed up to arrest Ward, but then Ward’s kid Rafe - he’s a crazy motherfucker - shot Peterkin, John B ran because Rafe was gonna shoot him too, then Ward called our friend Shoupe and said John B shot her and denied everything.”

“Did you witness anything at the airport?” Morgan asked, walking to sit down beside JJ.

JJ shifted uncomfortably, filling with guilt. “No, we ran once Peterkin showed up. I’m on probation. I didn’t need to get caught out there. As far as I know, the only people who were there were Peterkin, Ward, Rafe, John B, and-”

He stopped speaking as Jennifer’s attention was immediately diverted, her eyes locked on something outside the window. JJ’s head whipped around, seeing the one person he never wanted to see ever again. All of his cockiness and charm was gone the second he laid eyes on his father.

“Reid, lock the door,” Jennifer said quietly as Shoupe and Morgan slipped out of the office, leaving the three of them. From outside, JJ could hear yelling, the voices of his father and Shoupe unmistakable.

“Don’t let him anywhere near me,” JJ said suddenly, almost pleadingly.

“Who is that?” Agent Reid asked, and Jennifer nodded as if acknowledging that she was thinking the same thing.

JJ muttered, “My dad,” wheeling his chair out of view from the window.

“We won’t let him near you, okay?” he heard the woman say, and JJ just nodded. “I’m going to call the rest of my team to see how it’s going, you can stay in here. It’s safe here. We’ll be back soon with some more questions for you.”

JJ nodded again, opening his eyes and watching the two agents leave the room, closing and locking the door behind them. 

He sat alone for a while before pulling out his phone. He noticed he had several missed calls and texts from Pope and Kiara; he called Pope back, greeted by the frantic sound of his voice. “Dude, where the hell are you!”

“Bro, the FBI is here looking for whoever killed Peterkin,” JJ said, not answering his question. 

“You’re talking to them?” Pope asked in a worried but hushed tone. “JJ, you’re actually talking to feds?”

“Hey, they wanna help John B, man. Help him and put away the Camerons.”

“I can’t believe it.”

“I told them everything, Pope. They’re talking to Miss Lana too. Who knows, if you or Kie back me up-”

“JJ!” Pope was yelling now. “JJ, do you know how many laws we’ve broken? No, JJ.”

JJ opened his mouth to say something, but quickly hung up the phone as the door opened and a two stoic, official looking men walked in.

“I’m Agent Hotchner, this is Agent Rossi,” the taller one stated. His tone was flat and hard, and JJ instantly didn’t like him.

“Are you here to take my story again? The recorder’s right there bro, I don’t even think she turned it off.” He pointed to the tape recorder, which was still running.

“No, we’re here to ask if you would happen to know where Rafe Cameron could be hiding.”

“His house? It’s really big, you might want to check everywhere.”

“We did a full sweep of the place,” Agent Hotchner said in the same disinterested tone. “Any friend’s place? Anything like that?”

JJ sighed. “He’s this guy’s bitch. Some basehead named Barry. If my dad’s out there, ask him about where to find him, he buys coke off him. Rafe does, too. The two of them jumped me a few days ago.”

“Do you know where he lives?” the other agent asked, his voice slightly softer. “His father isn’t speaking, we’ve arrested him but can’t find his son.”

“Where’s Ward? I’d like to talk to him.”

“I’m afraid we can’t let you do that, son.” Agent Rossi pulled out the chair next to JJ and sat down. “Where does this Barry guy live?”

JJ sighed. “Shitty little trailer on the west side of Sunshine street. Ironic, huh? Dude’s full of sunshine.” He paused as Hotch watched him through narrowed eyes. “Second place south of the Dollar General, you can’t miss it, it’s a shithole.”

“Thanks, JJ,” Agent Hotcher said, and the two men left, closing and locking the door behind them again.

Sighing, he kicked his feet up onto the chair that Agent Rossi had vacated, rubbing at his temple. He had barely eaten since John B left, and barely slept. His high had worn off, leaving him tired and with a subtle yet persistent headache.

“I want this fuckin’ thing to be over,” he muttered to himself.

A voice made him open his eyes and walk over to the window. Ward Cameron was walking through the main space of the station, his large strides quickly covering ground, followed by two officers. He was yelling at Jennifer, the agent hardly flinching as he berated her. The glass muffled his voice, but JJ could tell he was pulling either the wealth card or the my-daughter-ran-away-from-home card on her.

“Hey Ward!” JJ yelled, pounding his palm against the glass. “Ward!”

The man’s head eventually turned to see JJ, and seconds later, he was at the pane of glass, yelling at him. 

“You’re a fucking murderer, Ward!” JJ yelled, ignoring the words Ward was throwing at him. Your friend could have killed my daughter. You ruined her life. You ruined my life. You’re a liar. JJ countered with words of his own. “You killed Big John! You killed those men! You tried to kill my best friend! Your son killed Peterkin! You don’t care about your family, Ward!”

The last sentence made him snap. Jennifer and two officers were trying to restrain Ward, but he shoved them off, picking up and chair and throwing it at the window.

Luckily, the window was made for scenarios like this. Ward couldn’t touch JJ, and both of them knew it. They kept yelling until they finally cuffed Ward, leading him out of view, JJ’s face still pressed against the window, his body shaking with rage.

He flinched as the door opened, and Agent Reid came in, standing in the doorway sheepishly. 

“What do you want?” JJ muttered, plopping back down in the chair he had been sitting in before.

The agent shrugged. “Just thought you might want to talk, is all. Nothing you’ll say leaves this room.”

JJ regarded him through squinted eyes, his arms crossed across his chest. “Why do you think I need a therapy session?”

Reid shrugged again. “Thought it wouldn’t hurt to ask. You’ve been through a lot recently. I can tell there’s more going on than what you told us.”

He sighed. “Everything just went to shit so quick. My best friend was framed for murder, he left, and now my dad wants to kill me the first chance he gets. And once they get the Camerons I’ll be expected to resume life as normal.” He threw up his hands for effect. “Life was never normal, life was never good. It’s fucked, man.”

--

JJ sat with Reid for another hour or two. The small talk had eventually drifted into an awkward silence, broken by more yelling.

“I didn’t do it!” JJ heard from outside the office. He could recognize Rafe’s voice anywhere, and it filled him with rage.

Reid had forgotten to lock the door. In one fluid motion, JJ was on his feet, throwing the door open, running and tackling Rafe, knocking him from the agent’s grasps. Grabbing his shoulders and throwing him against the ground, JJ collapsed to his knees, one on either side of Rafe.

He was helpless with his hands cuffed, and Agent Morgan pulled JJ off Rafe, restraining him. “Easy, big guy,” Morgan said cooly. “We’ve made the arrests, JJ, your friend’s name is cleared. You can get out of here.”

“What?” JJ asked stupidly, looking to a woman he had not yet met. She had long, straight black hair.

“You’re free to leave. Your story matches up with what Lana Grubbs told us, and we were able to recover a gun from the Cameron residence that matched the type used in the murder of Sheriff Peterkin.”

At that, she followed the others, leaving JJ standing in the middle of the police station. He could hear muffled shouts of Rafe, which dissipated after a door slammed.

It was over. JJ almost didn’t know what to do, so he just left.

A body collided with his, then another. He struggled at first, but recognized the arms wrapped around him, and melted into Pope and Kiara’s embraces.

“They made the arrests,” JJ found himself saying. “JB’s gonna be okay.”

tagging @jellyfishbeansontoast @pixelated-pogues @kookkyra @poguesoftheobx @shawnssongs @stargazingstarkey @letsgofullkook @jjmaybcnks @ims0golden @jjsmentalpolaroids @queenk00k @sortagaysortahigh @thegreatestofheck

[extremelyblackandwhite]

i wanna know what love is - 31

Pairing: rockstar! sebastian stan x writer!reader

Warnings: fluff

A/N: it’s the last chapter. guys it’s been such an honour to write for all of you, to listen to all of your feedback. this was my very first fanfic i felt people enjoyed and it’s been such a rollercoaster. it’s so bittersweet that it’s ending but it’s been a blast and i’m gonna miss it. i hope you enjoy it guys. much love, bea xx

(did i name one of their children after jess mariano? yes. do i have any regrets? no.) (if anyone wants any drabbles about them pls ask bc i’m finding it rly hard to say goodbye to them)

Last Chapter 

                                                   1 YEAR LATER

    - Y/N, wake up. - Mary hit the sleeping Y/N with the pillow making her whine as she opened her eyes to the bright sunlight. Y/N groaned, grabbing the pillow and turning to the side trying to go to sleep again. As she felt like she was about to fall asleep again, she felt cold water hit her. The girl raised her torso, eyes wide open as she stared at the red head holding flowers in one hand and a vase on the other hand. - It’s your wedding day and we have a schedule. 

   - You just tossed water at me. - she shrieked at her, feeling the coldness hit her. - God, this is my wedding day not the army.

   - We have facial, makeup, hair and dress, and that’s just for you. - Mary grabbed her by the arm pushing her up. - Let’s go.

Mary had been over the moon when Y/N asked to help her out with her wedding. They had to get married in London due to the boys being on the recording studio after Sebastian joined them back a year ago, therefore Y/N had made it well known that she was gonna get married in a garden which Sebastian didn’t really mind. What both of them minded was everyone wanting them to spend one week apart at least for luck. They both hated it, specially Sebastian who kept wondering she was gonna give up and be a runaway bride, something Y/N had told him she wouldn’t various times.

In order to make up for that stupid arrangement, they decided to have a first look away from everyone else much to both their families despair which keep telling them it was bad luck. They didn’t care however. 

Y/N spent four hairs in the makeup chair, between having face masks and her eyebrows tweezed at the same time someone did her nails along with the heat of the curling iron she found herself falling in and out of sleep. The photographer even took some photos of her asleep as Mary did her hair. 

She was finally ready and in her dress after four long hours, she felt beautiful in her wedding dress and couldn’t wait to see Sebastian, mostly because she couldn’t picture him fully dressed up. Mary and the rest of the team left leaving her in the room waiting for Sebastian who came in a bit later. His eyes watered as he saw her standing there dressed in white, looking like something that had fallen from heaven. 

   - I love you so much. - he pulled her into his arms, kissing her softly on the lips, missing her already. 

   - You can’t cry. - she said, noticing his watering eyes. - Or I’m gonna cry and I think Mary will kill me if I mess up the makeup. 

   - That’s not cool man. - she held her finger against the corner of her eye trying to prevent her tear from streaming down her face. - You look so handsome. 

   - Yeah, these are your father’s shoes. - he said making Y/N chuckle at how he did a little tap dance. - Oh, I got you something. 

   - C’mon, Seb. We promised no gifts. - she smiled at him as he took a small box from his trousers’ pockets. He handed it over to her, eyes set as she opened the little box to revel a pair of little pearl earrings. - Aw, Seb, you shouldn’t have.

  - I thought you needed something new for the wedding. - he kissed her forehead. 

  - Well, happily I knew you never follow your promises so I got your something too. - Y/N moved to her bedside table grabbing a rectangular back and walking back to him, slowly so she wouldn’t trip on her dress.

  - Now that’s just not fair, that’s a much bigger box. - he pointed at the box, making her roll her eyes. He took it from her, slowly opening it to see a pregnancy test, a positive pregnancy test. His eyes went from it to her and back to it. - Are you pregnant?

  - Yeah. - she smiled at him, the tears returning again. - I’m pregnant.

  - You’re pregnant. - he picked her up, twirling her before kissing her a few times, going from her lips to her nose to her forehead. - You’re pregnant, we’re gonna have a baby.

    - YOU’RE GONNA HAVE A BABY! - Mary opened the door, receiving confused looks from them. - What? I was just making sure you wouldn’t have sex and ruin my masterpiece before the wedding. 

    - Can you keep it a secret until the honeymoon? It’s quite recent. - Y/N asked, leaning against Sebastian’s side which had the biggest grin ever. - But yeah, we’re having a baby.

   - Right, we’ll talk about me being the baby’s godmother after the wedding. You go the altar, Y/N, we’re getting the garter. C’mon

                                                   5 YEAR LATER

Sebastian was driving down the highway like a crazy man. He had been away from his wife for a full month after doing press for the new album and all he wanted right now was to get back to their home. If Y/N was around she would’ve screamed at him to slow down but all he could think about was being with her again. 

He pushed onto the drive away, getting off the car and rushing over to the door, unlocking the door. As he stepped in he heard a high pitch voiced followed by someone hugging onto his legs.

   - Jess! - Sebastian saw his wife rush down the stairs, bath towel in hand and then looked down at his first born who was wearing his bath robe which meant him and his wife were fighting the bath time routine again. - Jess, what did I say about running down the stairs? 

  - But it’s daddy! - the little boy pointed at his dad who crutched down to pick him up. Y/N playfully rolled her eyes, walking over to Sebastian, placing a kiss in his lips as the toddler wrapped his arms around his dad. Y/N would always say that Sebastian was always Jess’ favourite, despite him being the one who looked more like her with the same eyes. He had been her hardest pregnancy when compared to his sister. All Y/N had wanted to do was lay down and watch TV, specially Gilmore Girls which had been where she had rediscovered her childhood crush on Jess Mariano. After a bit of name discussion, she decided to name the baby Jess. - Daddy’s back. 

  - Are you trying to avoid bath time again, bud? - Sebastian tried to apprehend him but he could never do that. He missed his wife and kids too much besides, his oldest had inherited his persuasion abilities. - You don’t wanna make mummy sad, do you?

  - No. - Jess cuddled onto his father’s side, arms still wrapped around his neck like a little baby koala. 

  - Why doesn’t daddy do bath time today? - Y/N smirked looking up to her husband. It was his time to try and hold down a slippery toddler. 

  - Alright, to the bath we go. - Sebastian held Jess as he climbed up to the upstairs bathroom along with Y/N which turned to enter the room near their own room. Y/N had already set the tub with some bubbles so Jess would find it interesting enough to care. All Sebastian had to do was managed to get his son into the tub which he didn’t do without a fight leaving his shirt completely drenched. - C’mon bud, it’s just a bath. Don’t you wanna smell nice for tomorrow’s party?

  - I’m gonna be 4. - he raised four fingers, his little smile that resembled Y/N’s so much splattered on his face. - Mummy bought a cake and we’re gonna have a bouncy house.

  - A bouncy house, no way! - Sebastian smiled as he carefully ran the loofa over his son. In no time he was out the tub and wrapped around a little green frog towel. He picked him up, still remembering the time when he would not walk unless Sebastian picked him up and took him to his bedroom. His friends always poked fun of how spoiled Jess was and Sebastian hated to admit it, but he did spoiled his kids like no one else. Back when Y/N was pregnant with Jess, every single thing possible available for babies was bought by Sebastian and it was no different once Jess got his toddler bedroom. He had been the only one for a long time and Y/N and Sebastian had so much love for him. - Ok buddy, which pyjamas are we wearing tonight? 

 - The space ones, please daddy. - he pointed at the NASA themed pyjamas they had gotten him once he started to get interested in space, something Y/N was really happy about. - Daddy, why do you leave for so long?

 - Well ... - Sebastian handed him the pyjamas, helping his son get dressed and then tucked into bed. - Sometimes daddy has to go away for a bit, but I’ll always return to you guys.

 - Can we read the new book mummy got me? - he held a blueish book in his tiny hands. Sebastian grabbed the book: I Love You to the Moon and Back. Well, he certainly did. 

 - I love our time together as we start each happy day, I love our bath time silliness the way we splash and play, I love to lift you way up high so you feel really tall. We’ll climb the highest mountaintops hold tight and you won’t fall, I love to share the magic of the stars above and think of all the different ways that we can show our love ... like when we’re touching noses, playing chase, or seeing friends. Our love is always with us, and it never, ever ends so snuggle safely in my arms, our day is nearly done. I love you to the moon and stars, my precious little one.

He looked up from the book, Jess fast asleep holding the very first stuffed toy Sebastian had bought for him when he heard Y/N was pregnant, looking like a precious little angel. Sebastian got up from the small chair, leaning to kiss his son forehead before walking to the master bedroom he shared with Y/N. There he found her wife with their second child, Marion. Marion was a recent addition to the family, she was about to turn one. Marion was the child that both Y/N’s and his mother said looked most like him with her big bright baby blue eyes, however her temper was Y/N’s. Mellow behaviour, liked to sleep a lot, specially leaning against their parents’ chest and unlike her brother adored the bath time.

   - Look who it is, Marion. - Y/N said, holding her baby girl in her lap. - It’s daddy. 

  - My little princess. - Sebastian threw himself onto the bed, holding his baby daughter in the air making her giggle. Marion still did not talk, she was an observant one like Y/N, however she had started to walk although Sebastian always joked she looked tipsy when walking. - You’re sleeping in daddy and mommy’s bedroom tonight? Are you, my little precious baby?

   - She’s with a cold, really whiney. Thought it would be better to let her sleep with us rather than wake up Jess. - she sat by Sebastian’s side, head leaning against his side. - I’m really glad you’re back home.

   - Me too, no more month long absences. - Sebastian held his daughter, getting off from the bed and walking to the crib Y/N had brought into the room. He laid Marion in the million of all her toys which both him and Y/N kept buying for her, leaning to kiss her on her head before turning to Y/N. - I think I might be thinking about a break for maybe a few years.

  - You sure? - Sebastian leaned next to her in bed, cuddling her. - I don’t want you to pause your career. 

 - But I miss the kids, besides, it wouldn’t be a complete pause. We could do some shows here and there, just not long months away from you and the kids. 

 - Whatever feels more comfortable to you, honey. - she smiled, tilting her head to kiss him. Sebastian smirked through the kiss, turning her on her back so he was standing above her. - Are you trying to get lucky, Mr. Stan?

 - I think you deserve some care, Mrs. Stan. - he leaned into her neck, leaving open kisses there. - Don’t you think so?

 - Mummy ...

 - Oh my god. - Y/N pushed Sebastian off her once she heard her son’s voice coming from the end of the room. She did not want to traumatise her son for the rest of her life. - Jess, baby, what’s wrong?

 - Nightmare. - Jess climbed onto the bed, putting himself between Y/N and Sebastian. 

 - Aw, baby. - Y/N pulled her son into a hug, kissing the top of his head. - It’s okay, why don’t you stay with mummy and daddy for the night?

 - Really? - he looked over to his dad who sighed before nodding his head. Maybe it would be better to have fun with his wife whenever the kids weren’t around. - Daddy, you’re gonna love the party tomorrow.

 - I’m sure I will, bud. - he pushed the duvet over his son and wife. - But now, we need to all go to sleep, okay?

 - Okay. - he closed his eyes, turning on his back. Sebastian leaned in to kiss Y/N goodnight.

 - Goodnight, Y/N. Love you.

 - I love you too.

He couldn’t ask for anything else. 

[detectivejay-chuckles-halstead]

Jay Halstead x Reader

Description:  Write a story about someone cleaning out their attic. They find an old piece of clothing, and inside of its pocket is an old keepsake.

Words: 4238

Warnings: MCD

Pairings: Jay Halstead x Reader

Sammy was at school, so you took the opportunity to do some much needed cleaning. You hadn’t touched the attic in months, not since...You didn’t like thinking about it, tried to avoid it. Most of his stuff had been shoved up in the attic with the help of his team. You’d told them you’d go through it when you were ready. It had taken a while, but you were finally ready. 

It was a slow process to even get into the attic, trying to tell yourself it wasn’t the right time. But if it wasn’t the right time now, it would never be the right time. 

There were three stacks of boxes, about nine boxes total, all labeled with his name. Jay. You couldn’t figure out how his life could be boxed into nine boxes. He had taken up so much room in your heart and in your life. There were things that weren’t in the boxes, that were around the house. Pictures. The cased flag from his funeral, his badge, his dress blues hat. His favorite clothes. His ashes in an urn on the mantle. You couldn’t help but finger his wedding ring on the chain around your neck. 

You brought the first box down from the stack, sitting cross legged in front of it, methodically going through each item. You weren’t going to get rid of anything, but you knew you had to go through it, to process everything. 

It had been six months since you’d lost him, the hardest six months of your life. There was no doubt about that. Each day was a little easier than the last, but you couldn’t help but remember those first few weeks which had been the hardest. You couldn’t help but remember the day you found out he was gone. 

-----

Six Months Ago

It was a normal day like any other, smiling as you woke up next to your amazing husband. His arms held you close to his body, perfectly molded to him. He’d always said you were his missing puzzle piece, how perfectly the two of you fit together. It was a nice calm morning, until your five year old came bounding in, joining the two of you in bed.

He was the best thing that had happened to you. For a long time, you’d thought it had been Jay, until Sammy came around. You would kill for your little boy, and would definitely die for him without a second thought. And you knew Jay felt the same way. Sammy was your miracle. For a long time, you thought a child wasn’t part of your plan. You’d suffered through two miscarriages, countless doctors appointments. There had been countless nights crying into Jay’s chest as he held you close, as you wondered why the universe thought it wasn’t meant to be. You’d been hopeful when the pregnancy test came back positive, but very reserved. Nothing scared you more than losing another baby. Jay had been the optimistic one for the two of you. And the day Sammy was born, you thought you were dreaming until you held that crying baby in your arms with Jay smiling at your side. 

“Do you have to go?” you asked Jay when his phone went off on the bedside table. He just gave you a smile and a kiss. 

“You know Chicago. Crime stops for nothing. I’ll call you when I can,” he assured you as he got up, your eyes scanning over his perfect body. You no longer counted the scars, or the bruises when he had them. You still worried, but it was something you were used to by that time. 

“Just no visiting me at work, got it?” you reminded him, getting a laugh. 

“I promise I’ll do my best.” A visit at work usually meant he’d gotten hurt. Most of the time, though, it meant a victim or criminal was the one that got hurt. 

“You better, Jay Halstead. I love you too much to lose you.”

“I love you too,” he seconded, kissing you before kissing Sammy. The little boy -- who was a spitting image of his father -- giggled, smiling as he pulled his dad in for just a second longer. “I love you, little man.” 

“Love you, daddy.” 

You’d gotten Sammy off to school without a hitch, which was a miracle in itself. Usually, there was a lot of kicking and screaming and crying. You were thankful for the easy morning, strolling into work like any other day. 

“How’s my favorite sister-in-law?” Will asked you from his locker as you hung up your jacket. 

“How many times do I have to remind you that I’m your only sister-in-law?” you countered with a smile, pulling out your phone to show him pictures of his nephew. 

“I swear, he’s looking more and more like Jay every day.” You couldn’t disagree with that.

“Yeah. Eighteen hours of horrendous labor, and he comes out a carbon copy of his dad,” you joked before heading off to start off your morning in the ED. 

There’d been no texts from Jay that day, which didn’t worry you too much, considering it happened sometimes. Especially when caught up in a case. It was a little suspicious, though, when you got a call from Voight to not expect Jay home that night. Usually, it was Jay letting you know he’d been gone for the night. Again, though, it didn’t worry you too much. 

Going to bed that night, you’d just had a gut feeling that something wasn’t right, but didn’t ask. Oh, how you wished you’d asked. 

Getting Sammy to school the next morning was harder than the previous day. You couldn’t figure out why, the boy kicking and screaming. He’d been crying for Jay all morning, and you wanted to do nothing but swing by the station to show him that Daddy was okay. But something in you stopped you. Instead, you dropped him off at school with tears still on his cheeks. 

You went to work, trying to shake off whatever feeling you had. It was difficult, not letting it affect your job, but it was doable. That was until you heard the ambulance report on the radio. You were on the trauma doctor that day, but Maggie quickly pulled you, telling Ethan to meet the crew in Baghdad. That didn’t mean you didn’t hear what the paramedics were saying.

“Forty year old male, CPD officer, shot by offender. GSW to the left chest, no exit wound. Hypotensive and bradycardic. GCS 8, blunt force trauma to head and face. Pupils are equal and reactive. Two large-bore IVs bilateral ACs with 2 litres fluid wide open. Five out.” 

You didn’t know it was Jay, but at the same time you did. In your gut, you knew. And your fears were proven correct when they wheeled him through the door. The short glimpse you got of him told you things were not looking good. 

They’d cut off his shirt, the same one he’d left the house in the previous morning. EKG stickers were stamped across his chest. A non-rebreather was strapped to his face, giving him oxygen that was much needed. Blood covered his face, matted in his hair. His eyes were closed, chest heaving with each breath. You couldn’t tear your eyes away, even as they pulled the curtain to block your view. Not until you felt a firm hand on your shoulder.

Anger grew in the pit of your stomach, quickly drowning out the worry and fear. Voight stood next to you, a look of pity on his face. You couldn’t help it, it was your instinctual reaction.

“You were supposed to keep him safe!” you yelled at the older man, but he didn’t flinch. “He is supposed to come home every night, safe! And you couldn’t do that?” 

“Y/N, let me explain,” he said, voice unwavering, as if he didn’t care. You knew that wasn’t true though, Intelligence being a family after all, which at this point you scoffed at. What family would let something like this happen?

“Explain? Explain what, Hank?” you continued, cutting him off before he had a chance to say anything further. “Explain how you couldn’t keep my husband safe! Huh? Explain that to me, because that is your job! It’s your job to make sure he comes home to his wife and to his son every night!” You felt Will grab your elbow, shaking him off quickly as you shoved your hands into Hank’s chest as you continued. “Explain to me how my husband is in that trauma room fighting for his life! Because you better have a damn good reason, because it’s your life on the line too! Because if he doesn’t make it, I’ll kill you myself.” There was anger and truth in your words, spitting them out like fire as the rage began to consume you. Because it was easier to feel rage and anger than it was to admit how terrified you actually were. 

“We were chasing a lead, weren’t expecting the deal to go south. Jay was caught in the crossfire.”

“He better pull through, Hank,” you reminded him again, before letting Will walk you to a chair at the nurse’s station, knowing you didn’t want to be far from Jay. 

It didn’t take long for him to be whisked away to emergency surgery, and for Will to take you up to the surgery waiting room, along with the Intelligence team. None of them said anything to you, or even looked your way until you mentioned something to Will.

“Sammy’s at school. Usually, Jay would pick him up,” you said softly, not knowing any of them had heard you. 

“I’ll go get him, take him back to your place,” Kim assured you, taking Adam with her. You nodded, not wanting to leave the hospital. Not until you knew Jay would be okay. 

Honestly, you didn’t know how long you’d been sitting in the waiting room, eating when Will brought you food and drinking when he brought you water. You couldn’t bring yourself to move, worried you’d miss when the surgeon would come out to tell you what was going on. 

“Dr Halstead,” Marcell said when he walked out, taking a seat next to you. A quick glance at the clock told you it was going on eight hours since ay had been brought in. “He’s out of surgery. Luckily the bullet missed a lot of the important stuff. Just a small knick on his subclavian artery, which we were able to fix fairly easily. His internal bleeding is also controlled. What we’re most worried about is the extent of his head trauma, which time will only tell. He should be waking up soon, if you want to see him,” he told you, letting out the sigh of relief you didn’t know you’d been holding in. 

Sure enough, there he was, skin pale, but chest rising and falling. You sat next to him, taking his hand in yours, waiting. Just waiting. For some sign he was really okay. Even when Will told you to rest, you couldn’t bring yourself to do it. There had been times before where you thought you might lose him, but this was different. This felt like the real deal, and you didn’t want to waste a second away from him. 

Around two in the morning was when you felt the pressure on your hand, looking up to see his eyes fluttering open. Your eyes met his, those beautiful ocean eyes. Those two seconds of looking into his eyes felt like an eternity until they closed again, a deep breath exiting his mouth, and the worst sound you could think of. 

All of your medical training went out the window, as you sat there as the wife. Not as the doctor. Because if you were the doctor you would have known that his heart was no longer beating. But you did know that, your instincts kicking in as you pressed the blue button on the wall, hands pushing hard on his chest, feeling his ribs cracking underneath your hands. The sound of his flatline piercing the silence of the room, mingling with your heavy breathing as you held back your tears. 

Hands were on your arms, pulling you away. Vaguely you heard someone say your name, but the sound of the blood rushing in your ears was too loud to hear what they were saying. Not as you saw them keep pushing on his chest, shove a tube down his throat, push multiple medicines to try and get the electricity flowing through his heart again. 

“Time of death, two fourty eight,” Marcell said to the team, to you. Whoever had pulled you away was the entire reason you were still standing as your legs gave out from underneath you. The love of your life was gone, and you weren’t sure what that would mean for the rest of your life.

-----

Remembering that day was difficult, it would be for anybody. But for you, it hit a little harder every time. The fact that there was nothing you could do. They had later told you it was a blood clot. One blood clot took away the love of your life. 

As you continued through the boxes, you couldn’t help but remember some of the better moments between the two of you, flooding back with some of the items you’d pull out. Like a tie. Who knew one tie could remind you of one of the best days of your life.

-----

Six Years Ago

Your mom had tears in her eyes as you stood in front of her, white dress hugging your body tightly. Your hair was in a loose updo, makeup done up. The last thing you needed to do was begin crying as well, considering how long it had taken for the makeup artist to do your makeup. 

“You look so beautiful, honey,” she told you, taking your hands in hers. You couldn’t help but smile at her. “I wish your dad was here to see you. He would have loved Jay.”

“I know he would have, Mom. But at least I have you.” You hugged her before pulling away again, glad you had the photographer capturing these seemingly small moments. 

“Let’s go show Jay how beautiful you look.” 

The two of you walked out, waiting for the bridal music to begin before beginning your walk down the aisle. As soon as your eyes met Jay’s, a smile was on your face, and you could see the tears welling in his eyes. You weren’t expecting him to cry when he saw you, but it was a nice surprise. As soon as you reached him, he took your hand in his, wiping away tears with his free hand. 

“You look absolutely, stunningly beautiful,” Jay told you softly, squeezing your hand before you had the urge to straighten his tie, which apparently Will hadn’t done for him. Then, the priest started talking. You didn’t pay much attention, too focused on looking at Jay. That was, until it was time to speak your vows. 

“Y/N Y/L/N,” Jay started, clearing his throat with a smile when you heard it crack. “When I met you, I never thought we would get to this point. Mainly, because I thought you would have the common sense to run far, far away from being with a cop. But you didn’t, and you have given me the best three years of my life. And I cannot wait to spend the rest of our lives together, and creating as many memories as possible. No matter how good or how bad it gets. Because I love you, and that’s what love is about,” he told you. Afterall, the vows weren’t for the guests, they were truly between you. 

“There was a split second when the reality of your job came crashing down, where I had the instinct to run far, far away, but I couldn’t. Because I realized how much I love you. There was no describing it. I knew that I had to be with you until I died, because we work. We work perfectly, even when everyone thought that we wouldn’t. A part of me knew that it was meant to be the second I saw you, as if our souls were already connected, even before you asked me when your suspect was going to wake up, no hello to begin. And here we are, three years later, Jay Halstead. I sure didn’t think we’d get here either, but I wouldn’t want to be here with anybody else. Because I love you, more than anything else,” you told him. 

The priest finished, the two of you sliding rings on each other’s fingers before sharing a kiss that conveyed more emotion than you thought possible. But it was official. You were Jay Halstead’s wife. 

-----

You knew he’d kept his suit from the wedding, but coming across that tie reminded you of that moment more than a picture ever did, if you were being honest. You couldn’t help as the tears welled up in your eyes. There wasn’t anything you wouldn’t do to have Jay back with you. 

More memories came back as you went through the boxes methodically, gently handling each item as if it were treasure. Because it was to you. These were the things you had left of Jay. You’d take no boxes, no possessions at all, if it meant he was alive. 

There were things you’d kept downstairs in your bedroom, things that were too hard to pack away. So, when you came across his favorite black hoodie, you were a little surprised, thinking it was downstairs in your closet. There were a lot of memories associated with this hoodie. Slipping it on, it felt like he was holding you again, and if you closed your eyes, you could imagine it for a little while longer. That was, until you felt something in the pocket. 

With a shaking hand, you pulled it out. It was a note and a small box. The note you recognized, it was one you’d written years ago. 

-----

Eight Years Ago

“Detective Halstead!��� you called from across the ED.

It got some head turns, but the only one you cared about was Jay’s. Which as soon as you saw him, you smiled. It didn’t take long for him to recognize you, getting a smile in return. You were holding a small piece of paper in your hand, not letting him see it as he walked over. 

“Doctor Y/L/N,” he said as he approached. “I came to see Will. Have you seen him?”

“Yeah, he took a patient upstairs to the ICU. He should be back soon. Do you maybe want to go get a cup of coffee while you wait?” you asked, hopeful. 

“Sure, but please tell me it’s the kind you pay for and not the free watered down shit in the waiting rooms?”

You couldn’t help but laugh and nod in agreement, shoving the paper in your pocket for the time being. The two of you walked in silence out the coffee cart in front of the hospital, thankful for the warm weather. This wasn’t the first time or second time you’d ran into Jay, having enough of a working relationship to randomly ask him for coffee, but this wasn’t a random thing. This was something you’d been wanting to do for a few weeks now. 

“So, Jay,” you said. “You seeing anybody?” You weren’t expecting him to choke on his coffee when you asked, but couldn’t help but chuckle when he did.

“Can’t say that I am. Why do you ask?”

“I’m not usually this straightforward,” you answered. “But, here’s my number. You should give me a call sometime soon, go get dinner.” You handed him the note. It was more than just your number, but that’s what you played it off as. He unfolded the paper, a blush flushing across his cheeks when he read it, clearing his throat again. 

“I’ll give you a call,” he assured you, tucking the note away in his pocket. “Thanks for the coffee.” You nodded, watching him walk away. 

Three days later, you were sitting in your living room at home, a rare day off. It was nice, to just lounge around, not worried about anything. No life or death or decisions needing to be made, nobody calling for a doctor. You had a glass of wine, and a stupid reality show playing on the TV. You weren’t really paying attention to the TV though, more focused on a phone call that you weren’t sure was coming. Or maybe he was just busy, you weren’t sure. You were pulled out of your thoughts by a knock on the door. 

You didn’t even look through the peep-hole, not worried. There stood Jay, holding up the note in his hand. 

“Bold move putting your address and your next day off on here,” he told you as you stepped aside, letting him in. 

“Do you want something to drink? I just opened a nice bottle of red, or I have beer?” you offered, ignoring what he’d just said. You knew it was true, but you figured you needed to be bold to get his attention. 

“I’ll have a glass of whatever you’re having.” You nodded, going to the kitchen to grab another glass. You brought it back, pouring him a glass as the two of you sat on the couch. Jay looked at you hesitantly before kicking off his shoes and making himself comfortable. “This isn’t something I normally do,” he told you.

“And you think I give every cute cop I come across my phone number and address?” you countered with a smile as you handed off the glass. 

“I don’t know what to think, Y/N. I mean, it’s very straightforward.” That definitely wasn’t a lie. 

“Well, it seemed like you were never going to make a move, so I did it for you. Plus, if you weren’t interested, you wouldn’t be here,” you reminded him. 

“When a pretty doctor lady invites you over, you don’t just turn that down,” he added, taking a swig from the glass. 

“You always have a choice, Jay.” He just smirked and shook his head. You had a feeling it was more than that, that he actually wanted to be there with you. 

The night was full of good wine and laughing. A few hours later, you looked over at the clock to see that it was nearly midnight. The two of you had naturally gravitated towards each other, your head resting on his chest with his arm around you. It was natural. 

“You should stay the night, Jay,” you told him, knowing he probably shouldn’t drive. He’d graduated from a couple glasses of wine to a couple of beers. 

“I can call a taxi,” he assured you. “I don’t want to impose.”

“What if I told you I wanted you to stay?” you asked with a sly smile. You really did want him to stay. The night was still young, plus, you were really enjoying his company. You’d learned more about Jay that night than you had in the weeks of knowing him. 

“I’d ask if you were absolutely sure, because me staying the night means everything is going to change between us.” 

There wasn’t a second thought when it came to what you wanted. Your mind had been made up, kissing him softly. It seemed to take him by surprise, but he seemed to go with it pretty fast. He was a really good kisser, better than you had originally imagined. 

“Jay,” you said against his lips before repositioning, straddling his lap with hands in his hair. 

“I’m kind of glad I took you up on this offer,” he told you before kissing you again, hands on your waist as he pulled you flush against him. This was definitely your best idea yet.

-----

You wouldn’t have believed anybody if they told you you’d end up married to the man. But you were. You eventually brought yourself to open the box that had been residing in the pocket of the hoodie for at least the past six months. 

“What?” you asked softly, carefully opening the small box to reveal a locket. Quickly popping open the locket to look inside. 

“Jay…” You saw a picture of the two of you on your wedding day. On the other side was a picture of Jay and Sammy right after Sammy was born. The smile on Jay’s face was as bright as the sun. He loved every second of being a father. You figured he’d gotten it for your anniversary since it had been coming up right after he died. There really was no other choice than to wear it.

When you looked at your watch, you saw it was getting to the mid-afternoon, and Sammy would be home soon. Carefully, you packed the boxes up again, still wearing his hoodie. It still smelled like him, comforting. As you began your descent down the attic ladder, you could have sworn you heard his laugh, saw him out of the corner of your eye. You were a firm believer he was still there with you, and all of this -- the memories, the locket, the memory of his laugh -- just solidified that even more.  

[writing-mermaid]

Today is where your book begins the rest is still unwritten

Summary : Y/N is about to marry her fiancé Brock Rumlow. Tired of being a trophy wife, and just before saying "I do", she runs away, helped by her best friends. She finds herself in Australia, where she will finally starts to be herself again.

Pairing : Bucky Barnes x reader

Warnings : None

Word Count : 12 539

Square Filled : @star-spangled-bingo : Free space

@buckybarnesbingo : Sharing a bed

Author’s note : This story has been inspired to me by the wedding of friends. My thought was, what would happen if at the last moment, the bride to be says no. A huge inspiration for that story also comes from the song Unwritten by Natasha Bedingfield. I'm fulfilling a few challenges with that story :  @until-theend-oftheline : "How did I even become this person ?" (I know your challenge is over for a little time but as I told you, I tag you in as I started to write that story a while ago), @staticscreenwriting : "Oh he's very handsome, isn't he ?", @writing4inspiration : "Am I ever going to see you again ?", @bxcksdoll : "I've got you. Breathe, okay ? I've got you.", @my-emotional-self : "Have you ever danced in the rain ?", @icantlivewithyou: "Dance with me." Don’t forget that feedback is appreciated and really important.

Song of the title : Unwritten - Natasha Bedingfield

Masterlist

Bucky Barnes Bingo masterlist

Star Spangled Bingo masterlist

Ko-fi

It's not so hard to say. I do. Come on Y/N, you can do it. Yeah, when the minister is going to say : “Would you Y/N, take Brock Rumlow as your loving and faithful husband until death tear you apart ?” “Yes, I do”. It's not so hard ! Except that it is. I can't marry him, I thought that it was what I wanted but it's not. And I'm really realizing it right now, at the venue, in my white dress, making me look like a freaking meringue and that I didn't even choose. Not the date of that wedding, the place where we're celebrating it, the music, the flowers, the food, the rings, the honeymoon... I couldn't choose a thing and Brock did it according to his own tastes, that I don't share, without asking me, if I do or do not want this or that. And now, I'm standing in that fucking ugly dress, looking at myself in the full-length mirror, waiting for my dad to take me to the altar.

 Yet, my story with Brock started in a good way. I met him when I started to work in his father's law firm right after my studies. Brock was the one who welcomed me on my first day, waiting for me at the reception desk. The least to say on that day was that he was really handsome, his grey suit hugging his firm body, his dark brown hair perfectly combed, a confident smile on his face. When his brown gaze was fixed on me, I knew that I would probably be doomed. After a few months, Brock asked me out and I accepted gladly, why would have refused, he was handsome and charming, the perfect combo. One thing after another, things became serious and we moved together after two years of dating. I kept my apartment in case of needing but at the moment I moved in with Brock, he paid everything not wanting me to spend my money on everything. And that's when it really started, when Brock started to rule my life as he wished. He started to choose my clothes, the places I could go, what I could drink or eat, where we went on holidays, which friends I could see... I literally lost my free will. He even told me I could quit my job as he was making enough money for us to live and that someday, he'll take the lawyer firm after his father, and someday maybe our son would. He was planning everything without even asking me. I didn't resign anyway, saying that maybe we could need the money someday in case of hard blow, he laughed and said that I could keep my job if it was amusing me. When I opened up about this to my best friends, Steve and Peggy, they said that I should be careful, that soon, Brock would probably trapped me in an unhealthy relationship where he would control anything and unfortunately, I let it happened, and I was stupid enough to say yes when he asked me to marry him when I wasn't sure that it was what I wanted.

 And here I am, in that ugly white dress, my hair combed in a way I really hate, around a lot of people I don't really like or don't even know, in a place I didn't even choose, in a dress I didn't choose, for a wedding I know now I don't want, food I don't even like and a honeymoon in a place that don't even make me dream. I have lost my free will, living my life as if I'm not living it. How did I even become this person ? Someone so passive that she let a man deciding for everything in her life when she used to be a free spirit. I wanted to do a lot of things before I met Brock, and before I became a lawyer, and I didn't. I sigh, looking at myself in the mirror, once again, trying to force me to look radiant and happy to get married to the man I love. Or that I'm supposed to love, I don't know, frankly, I'm not even sure that I love Brock. A knock on the door makes me snap out of my daydream.

  “Y/N are you ready baby ?”, my dad asks, entering the room. “You look...”, he says, not finding his world, and I perfectly know that it's not because of the thought of his baby girl to get married.

“I am dad. Ready I mean.”

“Are you sure, you seem a little...”

“No, I'm good”, I try to reassure him with a small tight smile. “I promise, I'm good”, I add, squeezing his hand in mine.

“If you're ready then”, he holds me his arm and I take it, lifting my meringue to walk properly with that pair of heels I'm uncomfortable in.

  We walk towards the main room where the ceremony takes place, where Brock and all the guests are waiting for me. I take a deep breath when we stop in front of the huge wooden double-leaf door, and my father looks at me again, searching for any sign of me giving up on this wedding that him and my mother don't really seem to understand. One day, when we were alone, my mother even asked me if I was happy, she said, I seemed to have lost that spark I always had before, and that longing I had for discovering the world and writing.

  “You know, you don't have to do it if you don't want to”, my father states, looking down at me.

  Before I have time to answer him, the doors open, the music resonates and we walk towards the altar, I've made my decision, it was hard to do, but that's the good one. My father stops in front of the altar and kiss my forehead before letting go. Peggy is next to me, she already knows what I'll do, she, her sister Sharon and Steve (who was the only man with us last night) know what I'm going to do. The music stops and I stand by Brock, looking at me as if he has won a trophy. A trophy wife, that's all he wants, and I know it and I came to that realization. The ceremony starts and the minister starts his speech, asking if someone in the audience wants to oppose the wedding.

  “Would you, Brock Rumlow, take Y/N Y/M/N Y/L/N as your loving and faithful wife in wealth and poverty, until death tears you apart ?”, the minister asks him.

“I do”, Brock answers, a smug smile on his face, looking down at me.

“And you, would you, Y/N Y/M/N Y/L/N, take Brock Rumlow as your loving and faithful husband in wealth and poverty, until death tears you apart ?”

“I don't”, I firmly answers, while surprised and shocked whispers rise from the crowd behind us.

“What do you mean, you can't ?”, Brock asks aggressively.

“I can't, I don't want to be your thing, I'm sorry, I have to go.”

  And without letting him the chance to say a thing, I grab the bottom of my dress and start to run towards the doors, Brock is so shocked that he's not even chasing me. I don't stop until I'm in the street, spotting Sharon in her car just in front of the entrance of the building. She opens the door from the inside, and I rush in. She barely closes the door and takes me to Steve's and Peggy's apartment.

  “You sure he's not going to look for you in here ?”, Sharon questions, opening the door.

“No, don't worry, I'm sure he's going to think I went to my apartment, that's the first place he's going to look for me and then at my parents. Luckily, I don't let any clue on where I'm going to go, and I don't even tell my parents.”

  I sit on the couch, thinking about them, my poor parents, I didn't even tell them what my plan was.

  “Are Steve and Peggy going to join us at the airport, as it was planned ?”, she pours two glasses of water while I go to the bathroom in order to change into more civil clothes and get rid of that abomination that someone dared to call a wedding dress.

“Yes, they are”, I shout through the open bathroom door, slipping myself into a pair of jeans and a random t-shirt. “That's more discreet than them coming back here to pick me up.”

“Y/N, I know you're worried about your parents and your family, but you took the best decision about it, you had to give Brock no choice or you would have been trapped in a marriage you didn't want”, she says, as if she was reading in my mind. “Don't worry, Steve, Peggy and I will tell your parents where you are in good time, you know you can count on us”, she adds, pulling me into a hug.

“I know”, I mumble in her hair. “I know that I can trust the three of you, and that you are the best friends someone could ask for.”

  She lets me go and I drink my glass in one go, before putting a pair of sneakers.

  “I'm ready to go”, I state.

“So, let's go for your biggest adventure !”, Sharon smiles, grabbing her car keys on the kitchen counter.

  With only a little suitcase and a backpack, I take one last look to my friends' apartment without any regret, just the feeling that I'm going to miss them so bad.

Less than an hour later, Steve and Peggy, join us at the JFK airport, Peggy is still wearing her bridesmaid dress and Steve his tuxedo.

  “Y/N”, Peggy shouts, running towards me, before taking me into her arms. “Are you alright ?”

“Yes, yes, I'm good. How was it back there ?”, I ask her.

“Your parents are wondering where you are and sort of worrying but they know you're going to be okay. And Brock, well, when he got a grip on himself, he screamed that he didn't understand how you could have done something like this. He rushed to your apartment and I wouldn't be surprise if he searches at your parents' home when he will see that you're not there.”

“I just hope he's not going to make your lives or my parents' a misery...”, I sigh.

“Don't worry, our lips are sealed !”, Steve says.

“Thank you Stevie”, I say, hugging him. “I love the three of you so much.”

“And we love you too”, Sharon adds, while now, the four of us are hugging in the middle of the airport, people passing by us and looking at that unusual show.

  I wipe the tears forming in my eyes and look at my three friends.

  “So, you really are doing it”, Peggy says, a little smile on her face, knowing that my destination was a dream I had since young age.

“I'm doing it. I would have love it to be under other circumstances, but, here I am.”

“Calling all the passengers for Sydney, flight 384. Passengers for Sidney, flight 384.”

“That's me”, I say, smiling to them.

“Have fun there”, Sharon says, hugging me one last time.

“I will.”

“Enjoy your freedom”, Steve adds, pulling me into his arms once again.

“I promise.”

“Take care of yourself and don't think about anything else, wear what you want, party as much as you want to, drink, go the beach and I don't know where else, live, that's all I can say to you after 7 years being a nun”, Peggy is the last one to say goodbye.

“I swear to you, I will live. I love you, the three of you. I'll let Sharon know when I'm there, she's the last person Brock will ask news about me.”

  I start to walk towards the registration desk, waving one last time at my friends, ready for a big adventure.

 Once I'm sitting on my seat, I sigh in satisfaction, savoring my restored freedom. I look at my bare ring finger, I left the outrageous engagement ring Brock offered me back in New York and someone there is supposed to send it back to him. After an hour or so in the air, I finish to fall asleep, just waking up in between during the flight to eat or go to the bathroom. I didn't realize until now that I was that tired. I'm probably relieved to leave all that wedding thing and loveless relationship behind me. I don't know how long I slept, but at some point, I feel my neighbor shifting on his seat, we might arrive soon. I wake up, completely rest and well. At least, as rest as you can be after such a long flight, but I feel well.

 We land two hours later, two hours, during which I took advantage of the magnificent view from the window. It's so different from everything I know, the landscape absolutely doesn't look like what I've seen until now. It's wild and has huge extent and I can't wait to discover that country or at least the region I'm going to stay in for a few times.

 As soon as I land in Australia, I feel tired again, even if it's barely the middle of the afternoon. My only haste is to go to the small bungalow I rented not far from the beach.

  “So here we are”, the owner says, showing me the little house. “It's small, but it's cozy, I think you'll enjoy it. I don't know how long you intend to stay but, I think you're going to like this place. Everything is nearby, the beach, the city, some stores. And it's very calm, as you asked for a quiet place, it's the good one.”

“It's perfect”, I answer her. “Thank you.”

“I think you probably want to rest a little, you had a long journey. I took the liberty to put some food on the fridge, and don't even think to refund it, that's on me. There are some fruits and juices and fresh water”, she adds, smiling before exiting the bungalow.

  I look around one last time before going into the bedroom and letting myself fall on the bed, instantly falling asleep. I don't know how long I slept but, when I wake up, the sky is all dark, glowing with stars I've never seen during my whole life. I step under the porch of the bungalow and look at the sky, thinking that I really took the good decision. I deeply breathe the sea air coming to me and head back inside in order to take a hot shower and going back to bed.

 When I wake up the next morning, I'm completely rest, and I decide to have a walk in the surrounding area. The sun is already high in the sky and it's also very hot, something I'm not usually used to when Brock chose the places we were going to visit and it was always planed, visit that thing at that hour, that one at this hour. Going on vacation with Brock was never spontaneous, always as regular as a clockwork. Once, we went to Paris and I wanted to climb the 270 steps to see Paris from the Sacré Coeur in Montmartre from where you can see the whole city's landscape at once, and where the view is stunning. So, I took him by surprise to take him there and once at the foot of the steps, he said we didn't have time and that wasn't on the program and that we were going to stick on it. He also said that the next afternoon I could do it on my own as he had an appointment for work. I thought we could do something romantic for once, but I was wrong, romantic things were only for the beginning of our story. I went to Montmartre on my own the next day.

 After another quick shower, I put my bath suit and over it, a white tank top and a short. In a bag I fold a towel, my wallet, sunscreen and my e-reader. Once under the porch, I slip my feet in a pair of flip-flops I bought last summer. I'm going to take a little walk this morning, probably eat something at noon and then head to the beach and enjoy the sun and the sea. During my walk downtown, I buy a summer hat to protect my head and my face of the burning sun of Australia. I finally stop in a small café, Hela's Cabin to take a breakfast. When I pass the threshold, a stunning dark-haired woman greets me and shows me a free spot in a corner.

  “Welcome to Hela's Cabin sweetie, what can I serve you ?”, she asks me, her Australian accent sort of singing in her words, while she was handing me a menu.

“I'm going to take”, I start, studying the menu in my hands. “I'm going to take a bowl of fresh fruits, an apple-pear-cinnamon juice and pancakes please.”

“On its way to you, love”, she says, after writing everything down on her notepad. “Skurge, fresh fruits, juice and pancakes on the way please !”, she shouts, to be answered a “yeah” by a drawling voice.

  I take a look around me, looking at the café's decoration. It looks like there is a mix between Australian culture and Northern European, like Sweden or Norway. This place seems to be such a peaceful one, suitable for everyone, families, couples, people that are alone, students, vacationers, everyone seems to be welcome here. I sit back and relax on my chair, pulling out my e-reader while waiting for my order.

  “And that's for you sweetheart”, the brunette comes back ten minutes later. “Enjoy your food and don't hesitate to compliment the chef !”, she adds, winking.

“Thanks”, I smile at her, before cutting a bite of pancakes.

  Jeez those are the best I never ate ! Nothing in common with those horrors that Brock made me ate every Sunday at that restaurant he likes to go for brunch. In here, it has a taste of paradise, it's sweet and light, not like those things full of grease and oil I have eaten in New York. I take a bite of the fresh fruits from the ball laying down in a white bowl next to the plate, it's divine. They are so juicy and sweet, just the perfect balance of sugar and juice. I'm never going to leave this place I swear.

  “Was it good ?”, the black hair woman questions, coming back when my dishes are empty.

“It was more than good, thank you so much.”

“You're welcome darling, come back whenever you want”, she adds, when I pay her. “We are open from 7 am to 1 pm. Serving food and drinks all day long.”

  When I go back outside, I'm surprised by the heat and realize how fresh the restaurant was. I take my sunscreen bottle from my bag and put some on my arms, legs and face, I rather be protected than burn because of the sun. I wander a little more and finish on a crowded beach. I take a quick look from the sidewalk I'm on, I see families playing on the sand or in the water, surfers taking the waves, some bathers. The water seems so good and I just want to dive in it. I take my flip-flops off and start to walk on the warm sand, letting my feet sinking in. It's such a pleasant sensation. I already know that this is something I couldn't have done barely two days ago. I sneak between the people around to find myself a spot, but I feel like I'm wasting my time, until I spot an empty place near a pile of beach towels and a cool box a few meters away. It's little but I can fit in it, I think. Once there, I start to unfold my own towel, ready to lie down under the sun a little, when a tall blond and muscular man, goes out of the water, a surfboard under his right arm, and jogs towards me.

  “Hi !”, he warmly says.

“Hi”, I say back. “I'm sorry, am I impinging on your space ? I can't leave if you want, find myself another spot.”

“No that's okay”, he answers with his deep voice. “You can stay here, you're not impinging and there are no other spots around, I don't think my friends are going to mind”, he smiles at me. “I'm Thor by the way”, he adds, extending his hand to me.

“Y/N”, I answer, shaking his strong hand, or rather being shaken by it. “Thor, isn't it a Scandinavian name ? I'm sorry maybe I'm a little too curious.”

“It's fine don't you worry and it's totally Scandinavian, my father is from Sweden and my mother is Australian, but she has a thing for Scandinavian culture”, he laughs.

“Well brother, I'm not sure that Annie is going to appreciate to know that you're flirting with a stranger”, a thin brunet guy states, sticking his board in the sand, next to Thor's one.

“Oh, dear Loki, I'm just making friend”, he answers him. “This is Y/N”, he motions towards me. “Y/N, this is my little brother Loki.”

“Pleasure to meet you Y/N”, he says, handing me his hand, as his brother did.

  I shake it and detail the two brothers. Unlike Thor, Loki is less muscular, he's more of a skinny lad, hair as black as his brother's is blond. Their eyes, however, look alike, they both have blue eyes, but I sort of notice a spark of green into Loki's. I also note that, if Thor has an Australian accent, his brother has a British one.

  “Where's James ?”, he returns his attention to his brother.

“Still in water, I presume”, the later answers.

  Suddenly, my eyes widen at the sight in front of me, making the two brothers turning towards the sea. A tall and broad man just goes out of the ocean, he also has a surfboard stuck under his left arm. He walks towards us, some strands of his long dark hair glued to his forehead, and those behind his ears dripping on his suit and finishing their race on the sand. I can see his muscle moving under his wetsuit, I can't help myself but looking at him, my eyes refuse to leave his tall form, I'm biting my lower lip, that guy looks like a Greek statue carved by the gods themselves. What's going on in that bloody country ? Are all men going out of the ocean here are more beautiful than the one before ?

  “Hey guys, what's up ?”, he asks, running his free hand in his hair, pushing the wet hair from his forehead, before sinking his board in the sand. He's even more gorgeous from a closer look.

  He starts to unzip his wetsuit, and I bite my lower lip harder. I haven't felt this way in a very long time. His back is to me, he removes his arms from the suit's sleeves. I breath heavily without even notice it. It's been a long time since I haven't really look at a man, aside from Brock, I must admit that staying eight years with the same man doesn't really makes you look around, even when love is gone. And now, here am I, completely fascinate by a man I don't even know and that barely said four words, and not even to me. He continues to slip the suit to his feet, not even once minding me nor at the other women around looking at him, he must be used to it. I can see a few scars on his left arm, running from the top on his shoulder to the side of his chest, to his wrist. It's really not pretty but it's a part of him. He pulls the suit from his legs and feet and finally seems to realize that his friends are not alone.

  “Hi”, he says, turning to me, a bright smile on his face, and I notice the unusual color of his eyes. Not exactly grey, but not entirely blue either. I examine him, he's handsome. “I'm James”, he continues, “but I mainly go by Bucky”, he extends his hand, waiting for me to do the same.

“Sorry, I'm Y/N”, I eventually answer, shaking his large and warm, but wet and sandy hand.

“Nice to meet you”, he smiles a little more, his eyes crinkling at this action.

“Maybe we should sit down with us and we could talk”, Thor states.

“No, I'm going to find myself a new spot, I don't want to bother you.”

“You don't, please Y/N, stay with us. You can tell us your story, because, judging by your accent, you're not from here”, Loki says.

“This is a good one Loki, not long ago you said you would tell Annie I was speaking to a woman, and now you invite the same woman to stay with us, when we barely meet her, what would Jenny say ?”

“Don't worry brother, I'm just being polite.”

“Yes, polite”, Thor laughs.

  The two brothers start to argue, not really but still, they are chatting loudly.

  “Don't mind them”, James says, sitting next to me. “It happens a lot, but they do love each other.”

“I can see this. I wish I had brothers and sisters.”

“I have five sisters, sometimes I wish I were an only child, but I realize that my life would suck without them.”

  He has a tender smile on his face mentioning his sisters.

  “So, Y/N, what does a New Yorker like you is doing in Australia ?”, he asks.

“I... Wait, how do you know I'm from New York ?”, I question, shocked by statement.

“Because, I'm from there too.”

“That’s a long story”, I answer. “And you, what brought you here ?”

“Less longer than your story probably, a pretty bad break-up. I needed to take a brand-new start. I left my job and I traveled the world. I thought it would help me, but I was really down when I arrived here. I was broke and I met those two”, he says, motioning towards Thor and Loki. “They helped me, taught me how to surf and I decided to stay.”

“And two Aussie guys taught you how to surf, is that it ?”

“Yes, that’s it, they were very patient with me, and it wasn’t that easy for them, but I have been a diligent pupil and I learned fast enough for them.”

“And when are you going back to New York ?”

“I don’t know. For now, I feel good here. It would take me something really serious to get me back to the US.”

“I see”, I smile at him, before turning back to admire the horizon and the surfers taking a particularly huge wave.

“Have you ever surf ?”, Bucky asks, pulling me away from the landscape to meet his beautiful blue eyes.

“Never”, I confess.

“Well, if you stay long enough, maybe I can take you on a ride, of even teach you how to catch the wave”, he tells me, flashing me a dazzling smile.

“Why not, I would love to.”

“Seems that the two of you already get along”, Thor says, sitting in front of us, hanging the both of us two beers.

“We actually discovered that we came from the same city”, I answer him, while Loki settles next to his brother. “And James offered to teach me how to catch the wave.”

“Nice, that means that you are going to tag along with us”, the blond adds, patting my shoulder with his huge hand.

“Yes, sure, if I’m not disturbing you.”

“Of course, you are not going to disturb us. Plus, we could make you visit the surrounding areas.”

“Okay, sure, this is so nicely asked, I can’t refuse.”

“Awesome ! You should come and eat with us tonight, we are doing a barbecue, the two of us, our sister, our girlfriends, James and you, if you accept the invitation.”

“I can’t refuse such a nice invitation, count on me”, I add, smiling at him. “Do I have to bring something ?”

“Don’t you worry for that, we have all that we will need”, Loki states, “our sister has a huge pantry.”

  We spend a few other minutes talking about the coming evening, before I decide to taste the water. Letting the three guys behind me, I can feel James’ gaze on my back while I’m walking between the people or towels lying on the sand. Talking about the sand, I feel it, warm under my feet at each step I’m talking, something I haven’t really felt for a long time. Once in front of the sea, I take a deep breath, inhaling the scent of the ocean. Of course, once again, this is something I didn’t do with Brock. According to him, sand is gross, the ocean is not a place to bath and let’s not talk about what he thinks about crowded beaches. A delicious sensation overwhelms me when the waves hit my toes, and for the first time in a long time, I finally feel free. I feel free to live my life as I want to, as I was delayed to. Walking forward and then, diving in the water makes me realize that I should have to open the dirty window from my gilded cage earlier. From now, I’ll live my life with arms wide open, because today is where my book begins the rest is still unwritten, I just have to stare at the blank page before me.

I go back, to my spot after what seems a day of swimming, when I only spent two hours in the water, James, Thor and Loki still there, happily chatting. I fall on my towel, appreciating the warmth of sun on my wet skin.

  “How was the water ?”, James asks, seeing the satisfying smile on my face.

“Very good, it’s been so long since I swam in the sea, I forgot how good it was. I probably will be completely sore tomorrow, but it was so satisfying”, I sigh.

  I might have fall asleep because at some point, I feel a warm hand on my shoulder. I open my eyes and stretch.

  “Sleeping Beauty is waking up”, Loki says with irony.

“Don’t listen to it, it seems that you needed it”, James says, while I’m rubbing my eyes, siting up on my towel. “Let me help you”, he adds when I’m fully awake, holding me his hand.

  I catch it and he pulls me with a force I didn’t expect. We are facing each other, our chests almost touching, our hands trapped between us.

  “Oh, kiss her already !”, Loki shouts, making us part, and my cheeks blush.

  I start to gather my things, putting back my short and my top on my bath suite, my flip-flop in my hand, my bag on my shoulder.

  “Y/N, would you like to come and eat with us tonight ?”, Thor offers.

“And that way, you’ll be able to let us know about your story”, James adds.

“Are you all sure this is okay with you ?”, I ask. “I don’t want to disturb you, especially if you already had something planed.”

“Oh, don’t worry”, Loki replies with his drawl voice, “If my brother invites you, that’s because you’ll be welcomed. He tends to bring lost puppy dogs in our group. Just look at that one”, he adds, motioning towards the second dark haired man. “He was miserable, and Thor brought him with us and now he’s better.”

“Don’t listen to him, I wasn’t that desperate, I just needed people to talk to”, Bucky shrugs. “I’ll give you my phone number and you’ll text me where you’re staying at and I’ll come and take you.”

“This sounds good for me”, I answer, fumbling for my phone in my bag, before handing it to him.

“Text me when you’re back home and I’ll pass by an hour later”, his fingers brush mine when he gives me my phone back.

“I will.”

  Once we’re back on the sidewalk, I part with them and walk toward my bungalow, turning around to see them laughing while they take the opposite direction.

When I open my door, I let my bag fall on the floor and sigh, it’s been a while since I really enjoy the company of people without Brock sighing every two seconds. And Bucky. How can someone I barely met had such an effect on me. Is it because for seven years I let someone direct me and my life, and that love fade away, and now I need something new ? I grab my phone and text him the address. He replies with a simple smiling emoji, but it’s enough to make me sigh of content. Brock would never have done that. He would have just sighed even more, or mumble that emojis are childish.

I remove my clothes whilst I walk toward the bathroom, wondering what outfit I can wear tonight. I barely know Thor, Loki and James, but they’re were so nice and friendly with me this afternoon, and they offered me to tag along with them. I usually don’t do that kind of things with strangers, but I have a very good feeling about them. I step into the shower, letting the warm water washing the sand and the salt of the sea from my skin. It was only my first day here, but already an amazing day.

When I go out of the shower, a towel wrapped around my wet body, I open of the drawers of the chest and start to fumble for a dress. I finally choose a simple white sundress with pink roses. I dry and style my hair, when I hear a soft knock on the front door.

  “Evening”, Bucky greets me when I open the door.

“Good evening to you too”, I reply. “Please come in, I will just put my bath suite in the washing machine, put a little make up, take my purse and I’m all yours.”

  The last part of my sentence makes him blush and I just want to facepalm myself. ‘I’m all yours’, what kind of girl says that to a man she barely knows.

  “That’s a nice bungalow that you rented”, he says, breaking the silence, while I’m in the bathroom.

“Thanks, I found it on the internet. Well actually, it’s my friend Steve.”

“Is it because of him that you are here ?”

“Steve ?! Oh no, he’s the one that help me escape what I wanted to escape. Him and his girlfriend Peggy, and her sister Sharon, they’re my best friends.”

“I see”, he simply says, and I go out of the bathroom.

“I’m ready”, I grab my purse and follow him outside.

  We take the same path I took this morning to go to Hela’s Cabin, and we stop a few houses further. Bucky pushes the portal, motioning for me to enter before him, following me. I can hear voices and laughs as we progress into the front yard, and the scent of a barbecue.

  “Don’t worry”, Bucky tells me, “You already know Thor and Loki, you’re gonna meet their girlfriends and their sister.”

  I just nod, still following him, before we stop at the side of the house, looking at a small group making food on a huge barbecue and a blond woman putting different kind of salad on a wooden table, a red hair woman setting the table.

  “James, Y/N, finally you’re here !”, Thor shouts. “You finally made it here. Please guys come.”

  He nearly pulls us into the garden.

  “Come on, let me introduce you to everyone you don’t know yet”, he excitedly adds, grabbing my hand and making me follow him.

“Thor please slow down”, I say, trying to calm him down, but also amazed that this big guy can be such a child. “We’ve got plenty of time for you to introduce me to anyone you want.”

  I follow him to the barbecue where a tall brunette stands next to a broad, tall, bald man, with black tattoos on his skull.

  “Y/N, this is my sister Hela, and her friend and associate, Skurge. Hela, Skurge, this is Y/N, the American girl Loki and I told you about.”

“Fresh fruits, apple-pear-cinnamon juice and pancakes well blow me down”, the brunette chuckles when she turns to us.

“You’re the…”, I stammer.

“Girl from the café, yes indeed sweetheart”, she cuts me. “What a complete coincidence. Skurge, that the young lady from this morning”, she turns to the huge man, turning the food on the barbecue.

“Hey”, he mumbles, returning quickly to his task.

“Come one, I have other people to introduce you to”, he grabs my arm this time and storms towards the bottom of the garden, where the blond girl I saw earlier is lightning some lanterns.

  I look behind me to see Bucky quietly chatting with Hela, a beer in one hand, shrugging towards me, as a manner to say that he’s sorry. We finally come to a stop in front of the blond girl. Thor lets go of my arm to tenderly snake his arms around her waist and kisses her cheek with the same tenderness.

  “Y/N”, he says, “let me introduce you to the love of my life, my sweet Annie.”

“Hi, nice to meet you”, Annie tells, trying to escape Thor’s grip, to pull me in a warm hug. “Since the moment I came back, Thor doesn’t stop to talk about you. I’ve never seen him so excited to have met someone new. Except for when we met”, she chuckles.

“Nice to meet you too.”

“Come now, you have to meet Loki’s girlfriend now.”

  He pulls me again, and it’s like I’m nearly flying because of the way drags me behind him. I almost stumble in the kitchen where Loki is leaning against the kitchen unit.

  “Goodness gracious brother, we barely met that poor girl and you’re already breaking her. Good evening Y/N.”

“Good evening Loki”, I answer, finally relieved that Thor lets go of me.

“I think everything is set”, a thick French accent comes from the other room, followed a few second later by a tall red hair girl. “Oh, hi, you must be Y/N”, she says. “Thor couldn’t shut up about you”, she laughs. “Nice to meet you, I’m Jenny.”

“Hey there”, Bucky’s head appears by the French-window. “Don’t yall want to come outside and have a drink.”

“Sure, coming, just before, I need to go to the bathroom, please.”

“I’ll show you”, Jenny volunteers.

“Wait a second before you go”, Loki says, grabbing her hand and pulling her to him before kissing her with passion.

  Seeing them and Thor and Annie, and the way they interact, the way they are with each other, makes me realize that my couple was the complete opposite. Not sign of affection in public or in private, monotonous sex, monotonous and boring life. All that mattered were Brock’s colleagues, Brock’s family, my family and friends being pushed into the background.

  “That’s this way”, Jenny softy says, pulling me back out of my thoughts.

“Thank you”, I tell her. “I’ll find the way back, don’t worry for me”, I smile at her.

“Don’t hesitate to shout if you need something”, she adds before leaving.

  A few minutes later, I go back to the garden, everyone is happily chatting, drinking and laughing. I can’t remember when was the last time I had a real barbecue outside and not a fancy dinner inside.

  “Hey Y/N”, Thor shouts again, waving his hand and smiling at me, that man is so sweet.

  Hela shows me a vacant seat next to her and offers me a drink. I thank her with a smile, looking her evolve around her brothers and sisters in law, after all, all I saw from her until now, was a smiley and friendly café owner. Then, we finally start to eat, and the long awaiting question comes from Annie.

  “So, Y/N, tell us your story, it seems that you told James it was a long one”, she says.

“Well, I hope you all have a long time to listen to what I’m going to tell.”

  And I start to tell them, start to tell my story to seven people I barely know. They all listen to me, something gasping, shifting in their seats at what I’m explaining to them.

  “So that’s the whole story”, I finally say when I tell them how I escaped New York and a miserable and unhappy life.

“I think you take the right decision”, Hela says. “It’s better to be alone than in bad company”, she adds. “Please tell me that from now you are going to savor that new freedom”, she concludes, squeezing my hand.

“I will enjoy every second of it”, I reply with a huge smile.

  A few hours later, full of food and happy to have new friends, I put my chin on my hand and start to stare at Bucky, who’s happily chatting with Jenny and Annie, laughing with them, I can’t hear what they are talking about, but still, James’ laugh must be one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever heard. I love how his eyes crinkle, and how he throws back his head when he laughs.

  “Oh, he’s very handsome, isn’t he ?”, Hela says behind me, making me snap out of my daydreams. “James, Bucky”, she adds, as I’m opening and closing my mouth, acting like a goldfish out of his tank. “That’s okay, after all, you’re only human. I perfectly understand. If I were attracted by men, I would surely also drool over him. Even if he’s not my type, the guy is gorgeous, in addition to be a sweetheart, so I completely get why you’re smitten. You know, the boy was pretty damaged when he first arrived here. Bad break up, like very very bad break up, his girlfriend was cheating on him for years with a friend of them. He told us that the moment he surprised them, he didn’t think straight, took a bag with a few things, went to the airport and took the first flight he saw on the board, and ended up here. Thor and Loki found him on the beach an early morning they were going to surf. He hadn’t sleep in days. They get him back on his feet. Thor calls that surf therapy. Since then, he stays here, does little jobs to pay a room and food. I don’t know when he’s going to be back in the USA but for now, he seems to be good here. He just needs to believe in him again and to trust someone else. I think each of you would do good to the other. And girl, if I were you and after what you told us tonight, I wouldn’t do anything but enjoy the man’s company, you need to live a little”, she concludes before lighting a cigarette.

  She’s right, I need to live a little. Before I can think about something more, Thor comes and grabs me by the shoulder, saying he’s going to show me some traditional Australian game. Around midnight, we all part, Hela saying that if we don’t leave her house, she’s going to kick us outside, because she has to wake up early the next morning. James insists to drop me at my bungalow, while the four others take the other way. We look at them going their way, Thor and Annie holding hands, Loki having his arm around Jenny’s shoulders, while her own arm is around his waist. We turn back to the direction we are supposed to take, a comfortable silence takes place between us. It doesn’t take more than ten minutes for us to reach my bungalow.

  “Thanks for taking me back James”, I say, once in front of the door. “I had an amazing evening.”

“I’m glad you did, that was a very nice evening indeed. Look, Y/N, as you intend to stay here for a while, I was thinking maybe I can make you visit the surroundings and if you still want it, I can teach you how to surf”, he says, scratching the back of his head.

“I would love to Bucky. I know this wasn’t hers to tell me but, Hela told me about what brought you here, and I’m sorry. You said it wasn’t a big deal compared to what the reason I was here, but I chose to leave Brock, you didn’t choose to leave that girl, you were forced to.”

“I’m sort of glad she told you, at least, we both learned each other’s story on the same night. Still, I think that that Brock guy never see how lucky he was to have you. You’re not the kind of girl that should be treated like a trophy wife. So, what do you say, do I take you for a stroll ? Thor and Loki are helping Hela tomorrow at her restaurant.”

“I’d love to.”

“So, let’s say tomorrow morning, I’ll be here at 9.30. Good night then”, he adds.

“Goodnight James.”

  With that, he turns back and starts to walk to his own place.

As planned, Bucky took me the next day, he parked in front of my door with a big bike. He hands me a helmet and tells me to hold on tight and he starts the engine again.

 After that day, meeting with Bucky, Thor, Loki or the girls became a habit. I’m here for a month now, and I think I got used to the fact of being free. Of course, I give news to my family and friends, I sent a few mails from a new email address I made, and postcard or letters, giving the less clue I can for Brock not to find me in case he’s visiting Steve and Peggy, or my parents, which seems very improbable. I had a lot of conversations with Bucky about what it’s like to be single after dating someone for a long time, after almost getting married. We’re becoming closer.

 And as he promised the first day we met, today he’s going to give me my first surf lesson. Yesterday we bought me a surf suit and for the time I’m learning, I’m going to use Bucky’s board before buying my own if I manage to stay on his one and if I enjoy it.

  “Okay”, he says, helping me to zip my suit, “I’ll be with you the whole time”, he adds, before taking my hand in his. “Are you ready ?”, he asks before we walk towards the water.

  I just nod in response, I think I’m impressed, I never surfed of my life.

  “Come on”, he makes me follow him in the water and put down the board on its surface. “As it’s your very first time, this is how we’re going to process. I’ll use the same method Thor used with me. You’re going to lay on the board as soon as we have water at the level of your waist. I’ll push the board a little further on the water, then I’ll let the sea push you back to the shore. Is it okay of you ?”, he asks, and I nod again. “Let’s go then.”

  I do as he says, and the waves bring me back peacefully on the sand. If it’s that easy, I don’t know why I so worried. The second time, Bucky makes me sit on the board, to check my balance on it. Once again, the waves push me back on the sand.

  “There are bigger waves coming, I want to try something if you’re okay”, he says. “You will take the same position sitting on the board, and I’ll be standing behind you. You’ll hold on the board and I’ll take the wave, that way you’ll have the real sensation of surfing, but not yet by surfing by yourself. Is it okay for you ?”

“I trust you, so let’s try it”, I answer.

  This time, he lays on the board while I’m sitting on it, swimming towards the open sea. I can see huge waves forming in the distance. Bucky continues to swim, until he stops, waiting for the waves to arrive towards us.

 “It’s coming, put yourself on your knees and hold on tight, don’t worry, I’m here”, I hear him shouts above the noise made by the waves. I swallow the lump in my throat when I feel the sea unleash around me. It’s too late to go back.

 This time is more violent than the two previous times. Bucky manages to get on his feet and directs the board the best he can, but the waves coming waves are really big. The waves are approaching us, and Bucky manages to keep on. I don’t really know how it happens, Bucky takes a wave looking like a tube and suddenly, we’re up in the air, flipping and the board nosedives, before hitting the surface of the water, making me let go of the edge of it. The last thing I know is that I hit the surface too, and then nothing.

  “I’ve got you. Breathe, okay ? I’ve got you.”

  I feel like I’m in haze, being dragged to the shore.

  “Y/N, can you hear me ? Breathe, I’ve got you and I’m not letting you go.”

  I can feel the sand under my legs and cough, water going out of my mouth.

  “Breathe, I’ve got you, you’re safe now.”

  I cough once or twice before opening my eyes. Bucky sits me up and takes me in his arms, putting a kiss on my head.

  “What happen ?”, I ask, still breathing heavily.

“We were caught in a tube. When we hit the water, the pressure made you let go of the board. But you’re okay, look at me”, he says, taking my head in his hands, forcing me to look at him. “You’re okay and that’s the most important”, he kisses my forehead and holds me tighter, while I’m still trying to catch my breathe.

  The following days, we try again, being careful that another incident doesn’t happen. After a week and a half, I manage to stand up on the board. I’m not really able to surf yet, but as Bucky says, it’s a good beginning. When he saw what I could do, Thor said that I was going to get better in a few times. They make me smile, they’re so sweet and amazing. I really love them all. A lot of evenings and days off everyone has is spend dinning together or at the beach, sometimes going to explore the surroundings. I really love being here.

 I’m here for two months now, and Bucky and I really became closer. We have long talks, sometimes we don’t even talk. Sometimes, I’m just sitting on the beach, a book or my e-reader in hand, his head on my knees, my finger sometimes running through his long chestnut locks. I really feel at peace here.

 Tonight, there’s just Bucky and I in my bungalow. Thor, Loki, Hela, Jenny and Annie have a family gathering at the Odinson’s, so I decided to invite him for a diner and a movie. The evening is nice and as usual, we talk about everything and nothing. The night is warm as the day was hot and sunny, the evening is spent quietly until I hear a soft ploc on the tin roofing of the bungalow. I rise for the couch, completely forgetting the movie and running to the window.

  “It’s raining”, I excitedly shout to Bucky, who’s still on the couch. “There is something I’ve always dreamed to do”, I put my shoes and rush outside.

  It’s not even cold outside and the raindrops are warm on my skin. In barely seconds, I’m drenched . Bucky followed me outside, and he’s standing under the porch, observing me.

  “Have you ever danced in the rain ?”, I ask him, joining the gesture to my words.

“Never but you’re gonna catch a cold. Come back.”

“No, I wanna feel the rain on my skin, because no one else can feel it for me.”

  I dance for a few more minutes, following the rhythm of the drops falling from the sky. I feel like I’m drunk when I’m obviously not, it’s just that brand new freedom that intoxicate me. I’m free, living in a small bungalow in front of the beach, just have dinner with a handsome guy, I have reasons to be happy.

  “Dance with me.”, I plead. “Come on James, dance with me.”

  He sighs and finally leaves the porch to join me.

  “You’re crazy, you know that”, he says stopping me while I spin on myself. “And anyway, how do you want to dance without music ?”

“There is music around us, can’t you hear it ? The music that the rain makes on the roofs, the walls, the ground.”

  I might sound very childish, but it makes him laugh, he throws his head back and laughs of that melodious laugh of his. He grabs my hand and pulls me to him, and we start to sway under the pouring rain. At some point, he pulls me closer to his body, his beautiful blue eyes glued to mine. My own eyes are travelling from his eyes to his lips, several times, and I surprise myself to wonder what his lips tastes like. I’ve never wanted someone to kiss me so much in my life. He might have read my thought because one second later, his lips are on mine, in the most passionate kiss anyone ever gave me. His lips are so soft against mine and my arms find his neck when he deepens the kiss. This makes me feel a little more alive. A real kiss, not those wet sucking Brock dared to call a kiss. After a few moments, we part, both panting, wetter because of the rain, smiling at each other.

  “We should go back inside���, he whispers against my lips, “we’re going to be sick.”

  He pecks my lips, grabs my hand and we head back to the house.

 From that moment, we are more inseparable that we have been since the beginning. I left home for six months now, my skin tanned, I now have brand new skills at surf, and I really not intend to go back for the moment. Steve and Peggy are coming tomorrow, they booked plane tickets to see me and meet Bucky. I also sent a postcard to my mom and dad to let them know that I was alright and that there was no reason to worry about me.

After spending the evening to watch the stars on the beach, we’re now making out on my bed, like a pair of horny teenagers. This became sort of a habit since our first kiss. I’m perfectly conscious that Bucky would like us to go further than just kissing, cuddling and sleeping in the same bed. He’s nested between my legs, his lips are trailing down my jaw and finding my neck that he starts to nibble. I know he wants more, so do I, but for now it’s impossible. I can feel his fingers caress my sides, and make their way under my top tank, tickling my stomach.

  “Stop, Bucky, you know we can’t for now”, I whisper.

“I know, I know”, he mumbles against my skin. “I still don’t get why though”, he adds rising his head looking deeply in my eyes. “I mean I get why, but you dumped that jerk six months ago.”

“I know, but I want to properly end this. There are some things I need to do back in New York.”

“Do you really think you plan is going to work the way you want it to ?”, he asks, lifting his body from mine, before spooning my body, his arms around my waist, his hands above mine on my stomach, his chin on my shoulder.

“I hope so”, I sigh. “I think I’m going to return there when Steve and Peggy will go back home. I will settle everything I have to take care of. I have to see my parents too. Move out from Brock’s apartment.”

“Do you want me to come and help you ?”

“You don’t have to James”, I answer, turning in his arms.

“But what if I want to, what if I want to go back to New York with you, help you to move back to your own place, meet your parents. You just have one word to say, and I’ll follow you anywhere you go.”

  All he gets for these offers is a kiss and me coming closer to his body, before falling asleep.

  “Do you see them ?”, I ask Bucky when we’re waiting at the exit of the plane landing.

“Calm down doll, I’m sure your friends are going to go out of that plane in a few minutes.”

“I can’t wait to see them.”

“I know but stay calm, they will be here in a few minutes”, he says, grabbing my hand and turning me to him, and my body collides with his strong one.

“Hum so do you have an idea to distract me while we’re waiting for them ?”, I ask, raising an eyebrow.

“Oh don’t worry, I have the perfect idea”, he says, leaning towards me and locking his lips with mine.

  And here’s the make out again, though, I’m not complaining. At least not until someone clear their throat behind me.

  “So that’s how you welcome your best friends ?”

“Oh my God, Steve”, I shout, throwing myself into his arms. “Peggy”, I do the same with her. “I missed you so much guys.”

“Yeah, we could see that”, Steve says ironically. “You must be James”, he adds, extending his hand to Bucky.

“I am”, the later answers, “and you’re Steve and Peggy. Y/N told me a lot about you.”

“And she told us a few about you, but not much, given the situation, but we’re staying here for a week, so we will have time to lean to know each other”, Peggy says, her arm hooked with mine.

“Let’s go”, Bucky says, “I borrowed Loki’s car and as I know him, if I haven’t return it by the time I said, he’s gonna be mad.”

 Steve and Peggy follow us through the airport. I can see their eyes widen at the sight of the Australian landscape. I can’t blame them, everything there is so beautiful. They rented a bungalow next to mine and Bucky drops them before returning the car to Loki.

That night, we are all on the beach, around a fire camp, eating, drinking, laughing. We are all in a good mood, Skurge is roasting some marshmallows on sticks to make us sandwiches with biscuits. I’m sitting between Bucky’s legs, my back to his chest, his jacket on my shoulders, enjoying the evening with my friends. Everything is perfect.

  “So that’s why you left”, a voice comes from the dark behind us.

  I suddenly freeze, I would recognize that voice in a crowd of thousand.

  “Y/N, what’s going on ?”, Bucky asks, as he can sense my body tense.

“What are you doing here Brock ?”, I ask, raising on my feet, Bucky following mere seconds later.

“What am I doing here ?”, he asks, ironically. “What am I doing here ?”, he repeats. “What do you think I’m fucking doing here Y/N ?!”, he screams this time. “I’m here to get my fiancée back to New York”, he finally adds, calmly.

“I’m not your fiancée anymore Brock”, I respond, trying to stay calm, Bucky staying behind me. “I thought this was clear.”

  I can see him fulminate in the light of the fire. He’s about to explode.

  “Leaving you on the wedding day and sent you back the engagement ring was supposed to be clear enough.”

“I looked for you everywhere, Y/N”, he continues. “Why did you go this far ?”

“Because I had to find somewhere where you wouldn’t fetch me, as this country represents a lot of things you hate, this was the perfect destination. By the way, how did you get here ?”

“Your parents”, he answers, and I open my mouth, completely shocked at the possibility that my parents betrayed me. “They didn’t explicitly said, but as I know I couldn’t expect those two”, he shows Steve and Peggy while saying this, “to tell me where you were, so I showed up at your parents, pretending that I wanted to have some news of them, and when they went to look for something they have to give me back, I looked around and found a post card from Australia pinned on their fridge, so I read it and then I spied on those two for a while and I managed to know when they were leaving, so I bought a ticket and followed. Now you’re going to come back with me and finish what we didn’t finish last time, meaning marry me.”

“No Brock, all that I’m going to do when I come back to New York is ending everything that has something to do with you”, I say, now completely pissed off.

“I don’t think so Y/N, you’ll come back, be my wife and shut up about everything else, you’ll just stand still and look pretty only opening your mouth when I’ll tell you to”, he spits, walking to me aggressively and grabbing my arm.

“Let me go, it hurts”, I try to struggle from his grip, but he only closes his hand tighter. “Let me go Brock.”

“You heard her, let her go”, Bucky moves from behind me to grab Brock’s collar, making him let go of me, while the others stand up, ready to move in case Bucky is in trouble.

“Or what ?”, Brock snarls.

“Bucky, please stop.”

“Bucky ?!”, Brock scoffs, “what kind of name is that, Bucky ?”

  This time, Bucky doesn’t hold himself for punching Brock. The later falls on the send, holding his bloody nose.

  “Are you okay ?”, Bucky asks me, taking my face between his hands.

“I am”, I nod. “What about your hand ?”, I ask, looking at it.

“It’s probably going to be bruised tomorrow, but it’ll be okay”, he answers before kissing the top of my head.

“I hope you understood now Brock”, I say while my ex fiancé is raising on his feet, “all I’m going to do when I go back to New York is break off all ties with my old life, and everything associate with you. You’ll leave me alone, live your life on your side and forget all about me. I don’t love you anymore, I stopped a while ago and I’m not a trophy wife, I deserve more, I’m my own person and I can decide by myself what I want to do and the most important, I’m finally going to be myself again. So yes, I’m coming back to New York with you at the end of the week, when Steve and Peggy are heading back, I’m getting rid of everything I have to and if you harass me, I’ll ask for a legal restriction from you to approach me. Did I make myself clear ?”

  Brock just nod, probably afraid that Bucky is going to punch him again. He raises on his feet, dusts his prohibitively expensive suit, like who wears a suit on an Australian beach, I know a dumbass thinking that the world belongs to him named Brock Rumlow. He turns back and leave. A few minutes later, by common consent, we all decide that it’s time for us to go back home.

  “Are you sure you’ll be able to handle all of this by yourself back in New York ?”, Bucky asks me when we’re back at my bungalow.

“I think I will. Don’t worry, I won’t be alone, Steve, Peggy, Sharon and my mom and dad are going to be there for me. This is something I have to do on my own”, I answer, putting my hand on one of his stubbled cheeks.

“Y/N, there is something I want to tell you for a while”, he takes a deep breath and looks at me in the eyes. “I love you. I love all and everything of you. I love your Y/H/C, your stunning Y/E/C, the way you fell in love with that country like I did, how you trust me to learn how to surf. I’m madly in love with you Y/N, and I’m ready to do anything for you. And I’m ready to move aside to let you deal with that jerk. But if you need me, I’ll be here for you.”

“Bucky, I… I love you too”, I answer.

  He takes my hand in one of his, and brings it to his lips, kissing each of my finger, then, the back of my hand, and my palm. Finally, his lips crash with mine. I spend the night in his arms, and all the following ones, until the day I have to leave.

It’s a pretty hot day, we surf one last time, have a last dinner at Hela’s Cabin before saying goodbye.

  “You will always be welcome here, sweetheart”, Hela says, taking me in her arms. “I packed you one or two things for you, Steve and Peggy to eat during the flight.”

“Thanks Hela”, I tell the brunette while I hug her tight.

  Then, Skurge gives me a quick but very tight hug, followed by huge hug from Thor and soft one from Jenny and Annie, and a small but warming one from Loki.

 “I’ll miss you all”, I tell them, trying not to cry.

“Call us”, the girls warmly say, “and if you want to come back, just ask.”

  Bucky is taking us to the airport, he borrowed Loki’s car again, but this time, the short dark hair man didn’t ask him to bring the car back right away when he did the last time. Once at the airport, I notice Brock walking with his suitcase towards the boarding gates with that arrogant way of walking of his own. Now that I have seen the man he really is, I wonder how I could fell in love with him, especially when sweet men like Bucky exist.

  “We are giving you some privacy”, Peggy says before we pass the boarding gates. “Come on Steve, let’s see what’s in the shop over there.”

  She grabs his hand and pulls him behind her to the said shop.

  “I wish you didn’t have to leave”, Bucky says, taking me in his arms.

“I wish it too”, I answer. “But you perfectly know why I have to go.”

“Am I ever going to see you again ?”, he asks.

“I hope so, I’m not ready to let go of you James Barnes. I don’t know yet when I’ll be able to come back, or if I’ll be able to come back, but I don’t want to lose contact with you.”

“And you won’t, even if that means we have to wait for a long time before seeing each other again. But I’ll call, text or Skype you every day.”

“Calling to all the passengers to New York, flight 568. Passengers to New York, flight 568.”

“That’s us”, I hear Peggy behind me.

“I don’t want to go, but I know that I have to”, I say, crying for good this time, the tears I was holding until now.

“Don’t forget that I love you.”

“And don’t forget that I do too”, I respond, while his forehead touches mine, before putting down a kiss on my lips.

  He quickly hugs Steve and Peggy, telling them to take care of me, before taking me again in his arms, before kissing me again. When we’re sitting in the plane, Peggy holds my hand and lets me cry on her shoulder. I feel heartbroken right now, leaving that place I lived in for six months, leaving my new friends, leaving Bucky. I cry myself to sleep, between my two best friends who promised to take care and support me as they always did their whole life to the man I fell in love with.

 Once in New York, I take the first few days to see my parents and to explain them everything, why I left and tell them about Bucky. Mom says he’s rather handsome, and dad, he hopes he’s not going to treat me the way Brock did. It’s so relieving to tell them the truth about what they thought was a happy relationship.

 Today is the day, I’m going to take back my freedom for real. Dressed in a blouse and a blue skirt, I’m ready to face my boss, Brock’s father, and Brock too, to finally tell them what I think of them and the job I hated for so long. I take a deep breath and push the glass door to enter the Rumlow and Sons law firm.

  “Oh, hi Y/N”, Greta, the girl from the reception desk greets me. “You’re finally back”, she adds.

“Not for long Greta”, I answer, “I’m just passing by.”

  She looks at me making my way to the elevators. On my way to the top of the building, my old colleagues greet me, all saying that’s it’s good to have me back. I simply smile back to them. When I finally arrive to the last floor, the elevator dings, and I confidently walk to John Rumlow’s office.

  “Y/N, please come in”, he friendly says, when he sees me through the windows of his office. “How are you my dear ? You look great.”

  He makes me enter his office and closes the door. Brock is already here, looking outside.

  “John, Brock.”

“Let’s finish this business, would you”, Brock responds, still bitter of the things I told him a week before in Australia.

“Brock be nice”, John says. “So, Y/N, what do you want to discuss ?”

“First, as I explicitly said to Brock, I’m not going to marry him, I make my self clear enough I think when I left him on our wedding day. I needed to find myself again, I didn’t recognize myself anymore in what I had become. That’s why I left, and it helped me knowing what I want and what I don’t want.”

“That’s what you say, I’m sure you left me for that long-haired guy, what was his name again ? Barky, some shit like this.”

“Brock please, stay polite.”

“James has absolutely nothing to do in that story, I met him there, in Australia. Thing is, I’m not here to discuss my trip or what I’ve done there, because that’s none of your business Brock, because I was free, I am free, I broke up with you the second I left the wedding venue. I’m here to let you know that I quit. Just that I quit, I hate that job, always did. If I did law studies, it was just to please my dad, but that’s not what I wanted. So yes, I may be thirty years old, I don’t know yet what I want, but I’ll probably figure it out. This is my resignation”, I add pulling out some papers from my bag. “I already signed them, this is the end. Nothing connects me with the Rumlow family anymore, and you know what, you can give me a bad reputation, I don’t care, I don’t care because I’m free, and because I met and love someone that don’t want to change me or force me to do things I don’t want. James loves me for who I am contrary to you Brock. Hope you’ll find your perfect trophy wife, it’ll just not be me.”

  With those words, I left the office, feeling so good that this should not even be legal. I say goodbye to Greta who watches me with her mouth wide open. It’s raining outside when I push the door to leave and I just want to dance under the drops, like I did back there in Australia, the night Bucky kissed me for the first time. Actually, I start to spin around under the stormy sky, while some of the lawyers working for Rumlow and Sons pass by me, sending me strange looks tucked under their umbrellas.

When my hair is drenched from the rain, I start to go down the stairs, I can see a man leaning on a car.

  “So, you also dance under the rain even in New York”, a voice I know very well says.

“What are you doing here ?”, I ask softly.

“Well, there is this girl I met six months ago in Australia. She’s beautiful, sweet, kind, she was rather unhappy here, was going to marry a total jerk before running away, from him. And I wanted to be with her, so here I am. I don’t really know yet what I’m going to do in a country that I ran away from almost three years ago, but it doesn’t matter, as long as I’m with her, if she still wants me. What about you ?”

“I runaway from an unhappy future wedding, went to Australia where I spent the best six months of my life. I met new friends, a handsome young man that I hope to see again someday, maybe try something with him, now that I’m free from my ex fiancé, the well-paid job I hated, that I’m back in my old apartment in Brooklyn, I just have to get my belongings back from said shitty ex fiancé, look for a new job. But above all, I wish I can be with the handsome man that taught me how to surf, he just has to come back to the USA for this, but I think I’m ready to follow him across the world.”

“This seems quite a plan. So, what do you think, would you accept a poor, broke guy that has nothing to offer to you ?”

“Of course, I will.”

  I throw myself into his arms, and he spins me around under the now pouring rain. We kiss under it, then Bucky takes my hand and we walk to the nearest subway station. I’m finally ready to write my story staring at the blank page before me. I finally dared to speak the word on my lips. Today is where my book begins, and the rest is still unwritten.

Taglist :

@the-geeky-engineer, @feelmyroarrrr, @amrita31199, @realgreglestrade, @hellomissmabel, @mandy19875, @howlingbarnes, @belleetlabeast, @theashhole, @sebbytrash, @crazychick010, @bionic-buckyb, @callamint, @just-another-fangirl777, @learisa, @hello-sweetie-get-the-salt, @mokacoconut, @marvelbase001, @thefiregypsy, @iamthemaskhewears, @snowyseba, @theycallmebucky, @buckysberrie, @speakcroissant, @fangirlwithasweettooth, @tequilavet, @iamwarrenspeace, @melconnor2007, @buckybarnesappreciationsociety, @mrshopkirk, @poealsobucky, @maiden-of-gondor, @jurassicbarnes, @abovethesmokestacks, @thisismysecrethappyplace, @arawynn, @sebbys-girl, @captainrogerss, @murdocksmartinis, @supersoldierslover, @clintbartxon, @totallynotashieldagent, @crazy-little-thing-called-buck, @4theluvofall, @supernaturaldean67, @prettyyoungtragedy, @papi-chulo-bucky, @just-a-kj-blog, @lenavonschweetz,  @forever-graphically-frozen,  @buckysglow, @winterscldicr, @whothehellisbella, @bethanystan, @re2d2, @asirenscalling, @after-avenging-hours, @mrs-squirrel-chester, @winchester-with-wings, @angryschnauzer,  @callingmrsbarnes, @suz-123, @writingruna, @sugardaddytonystark, @angelicthor, @thatawkwardtinyperson, @themistsofmyavalon, @redgillan, @loricameback, @star-spangled-man-with-a-plan, @bringpietrobacktolife, @farfromjustordinary, @you-and-buckyb, @bucky-made-me-do-it, @lovelykhaleesiii, @newmooneyfanfiction, @lovely-geek, @fanfictionjunkie1112,  @littlemarvelfics, @cordytriestowrite, @firefly-in-darkness, @caplanreads

[ororowrites]

Erik Stevens x OC: Christmas

Pair: Erik x OC 

Warnings: Light smut 

I also have a T’Challa and Storm Christmas fic. You can find that here. 

“Christmas is on you,” Mrs. Thomas told her only child on Thanksgiving. 

Since that day, Karissa was prepping a Christmas dinner menu and decorating her townhouse to get into the holiday spirit. Christmas dinner had been a tradition in her family for as long as she could remember. So, she had a big job on her hands. Since she was an adult with her own spot, the Thomas Christmas dinner was now a major part of her holiday break from school. 

But, dinner and entertaining 5 of her family members wasn’t the only thing on Karissa’s plate. Her boyfriend, Erik, was meeting her family. He didn’t seem to be bothered, but Karissa’s family had no filter. Her grandmother didn’t know when to keep her mouth shut and often said something embarrassing to run off whoever Karissa was dating.

“Where do you want this ugly nigga,” Erik asked, holding up the black Santa she had just purchased a few days ago. 

“Don’t call my shit ugly. Put him on top of the coffee table with the elf,” Karissa pointed towards the living room while she stirred her homemade gravy. The recipe had survived four generations and she prayed she got it just right. “Baby, I think I’m going to need more butter and brown sugar.” Karissa knew as soon as she said that, Erik would have a smart remark ready. 

“You used those two sticks I got last night,” he questioned, stepping back into the kitchen. His short dreads needed some TLC, but she’d have to worry about that later. “What the hell are you cooking?” 

“First of all, we are black. Those two little sticks weren’t going to do anything in the first place. Can you please help me out and go get a few more boxes,” Karissa poked out her bottom lip in an exaggerated pout. 

“You owe me,” Erik said, planting a kiss on Karissa’s lips before grabbing his keys and phone. 

“Love you,” she yelled before he shut the door. To stay on schedule she moved on to items on her menu that didn’t require butter. 

Once Erik returned with the sugar and butter, Karissa finished up dinner while Erik straightened up the space. “I’m tired as hell now. I hope they don’t stay over too long,” she complained, throwing herself on the sofa and putting her feet up on the ottoman. Erik returned the vacuum to the coat closet and joined his girlfriend before pulling a blunt out of his pocket. He lit it and offered it to Karissa after he took a long drag. “You must be nervous about meeting my folks?” 

“Nah,” he lied, leaning his head against the wall. Karissa stared at him until he chuckled, “Maybe a little.” 

“Awww, baby,” she sang, playfully pinching Erik’s dimpled cheeks. “Don’t be nervous, I told my dad to leave the gun at home.” Karissa joked ,earning a side eye from her boyfriend. 

“I ain’t never met a girl’s family so I must be doing something right, huh,” he added, reaching over to grip Karissa’s thigh. Even after almost a year of dating, those butterflies still formed in her stomach from his touch. 

“I guess. You’re cute, that helps you out a bit,” she teased, passing the blunt to Erik and resting her head on his shoulder. “I’m worried about my grandmother flirting with you though. Whatever she says, ignore it.” 

“Damn, is grandma a cougar? You better watch out baby, I may be leaving you behind if grandma’s mac n cheese is hittin,” Erik replied, catching Karissa’s hand as she attempted to slap his arm. “I’m joking, damn!” 

One hour later, the family of five had arrived at Karissa’s small townhouse. Her father, mother, two baby sisters, and grandmother were all standing in the dining room when Erik appeared. They had been wanting to meet him ever since Karissa returned to Chicago glowing and smiling all over the place. Her sisters had been stalking his social media, showing their mother pictures when Karissa had nicely asked them not to.

“This must be Erik,” Mrs. Thomas said, grinning from ear to ear. Mr. Thomas was right behind her, thinking up some questions to pester Erik. 

“Nice to meet you Mrs. Thomas,” he extended his hand but Karissa’s mother pulled him into a hug. 

“We hug around here,” she hummed, stepping aside to let Mr. Thomas meet his daughter’s boyfriend. “Now be nice, Charles,” the wife warned, patting her husband on the chest. 

“How ya doin’, son? I’m Charlie, Karissa’s dad aka Protector,” the father greeted the 5′11, muscular man with a sturdy handshake. 

“Nice to finally meet you, sir,” Erik said, trying to hold his laughter when Karissa rolled her eyes dramatically. 

“I don’t see how your little fine self hasn’t knocked up my grandbaby. Honey, you did good, Nana approves,” the matriarch of the Thomas family blurted out, not caring about her granddaughters hiding their faces in embarrassment. “Come here, baby.” Erik followed her instructions and stepped into Grandma Thomas’s tight hug. Karissa and her sisters couldn’t help but shake their heads at their grandmother’s lack of filter. 

Erik then introduced himself to the twin sisters who were suddenly acting shy like they hadn’t been snooping on his page months ago. 

“Alright, enough of the hugs and kisses, I’m ready to eat,” Karissa announced, clasping her hands together loudly. Her family followed her to the dining room, still gushing over Erik. Well, everyone minus Mr. Thomas who liked to play the tough role. 

“So, Mr. Stevens, do you have any family in town,” Charlie questioned, passing the greens to his wife. 

“No, it’s just me. My parents died when I was a kid and I don’t know of anyone else,” he said, Karissa could detect a hint of sadness but let her father continue when Erik squeezed her hand under the table. 

“Oh wow, I’m so sorry sweetie,” Mrs. Thomas said, holding her chest in sadness. “Well, I’m glad you could join us for dinner.” 

“Me too, I normally spend the holidays working,” Erik explained. “But Karissa told me she was cooking and I couldn’t miss out on that. Right, baby?” 

“Meh, I’m not all that but I got a little something from my mama,” she bragged, flipping her braids. “But I think me promising that apple pie was what got him here. No one can pass up Grandma’s famous pie.”

“There’s more than enough for you, honey,” Grandma replied with a smile. “Looks like you work out a lot so be careful, it’ll pack a few pounds on you.” 

Erik placed a hand on his stomach, “From what Karissa says, I think it’s worth it.” 

“Yeah, if she doesn’t eat the whole thing herself,” Tamia, one of the twins, voiced. “Those pies never stayed in our house for more than one day.” 

“Hush, I saved everyone a piece,” Karissa snapped back, sticking her tongue out at her sister. 

The family continued teasing each other about the famous pie until Mrs. Thomas interrupted the conversation to ask Karissa about her schooling. Suddenly, the mood changed because everyone already knew how much pressure Mrs. Thomas put on her children about school. “How’s Nursing school coming along. I haven’t heard you talk about it since school started back up,” she questioned. 

The truth was, Karissa was no longer in Nursing school and had dropped out earlier in the semester to change her major. Prepared for a big argument, Karissa put her fork down. “Um...I....I’m actually not in Nursing school anymore.” 

The twins gasped, “Girl,” Tonya put her fork down, ready for the blow up that was bound to happen. 

“Karissa! We pay your tuition to send you through the Nursing program. It’s one of the best in the country,” Mrs. Thomas exclaimed, her voice going up an octave. 

“It’s not for me, mama. Would you rather me flunk out or do what makes me happy? I’ve always been into theater and I could go far with it if I-”

“Theater? You think we pay for you to major in something that might not take you anywhere? Do you know how many people actually make it into the industry,” she continued, suddenly losing her appetite. 

“Baby, she’s doing what makes her happy. That’s all that matters, nursing isn’t for every one,” Charlie added, giving his daughter his approval. 

“But it’s all she ever wanted to do as a kid!” 

“Now, Trice, you know that’s what YOU always wanted her to do. This child was putting on shows and dancing everywhere when she was a baby. You ignored that and pushed her into Nursing because you wanted that for her,” the grandmother called her daughter out, causing Mrs. Thomas to wipe her mouth and get up from the table. 

“I’m not about to sit here and let you all gang up on me. I want the best for my child,” the mother complained, glaring back and forth between her husband, oldest daughter and mother. “Do what you want, but I hope you know what you’re doing, Karissa.” 

The table went silent again as Trice walked outside the front door to get some peace of mind. 

“Don’t worry about her, she’ll get over it,” the grandmother voiced, patting her granddaughter’s hand. “Do what you love.” 

The twins went back to eating as Charlie shook his head at his wife’s antics. She was a complete control freak when it came to her children. All of them worked to please their mother but Karissa decided to finally take control of her own life. Her mother meant well though. 

Clearly upset, Karissa began clearing the table and taking used dishes to the kitchen. Erik decided to help instead of sitting in the awkward silence in the dining room. “I’m sorry about that back there. She stays trying to control my shit,” Karissa apologized, taking plates from Erik and putting them by the sink. Hot tears burned in the corner of her eyes. This was frustrating. Theater and performing in general had been her life throughout her childhood. Like today, her mother told her it would be hard to enter the industry so Karissa majored in Nursing. Now she had enough courage to chase her dreams and she was being shot down once again. 

“Aye, come with me for a second,” Erik offered his hand and led Karissa upstairs to the bathroom. He closed the door behind them and grabbea Klennex from the counter. “No need for you to apologize to me. Trust, I’ve seen way worse happen at family dinners. One of my boys’s had his sex tape released at a family New Year’s Eve party. Don’t fret,” Erik laughed, wiping a few of his girlfriend’s tears. “Like your grandma said, do what you love. You know I have you back so that’s not a problem.” 

Karissa sat on the counter, Erik quickly stepping between her legs. “You know I got you, right,” he repeated, this time leaning into her lips. She nodded, tears still clouding her vision as Erik’s lips touched hers. “Hmm,” he moaned, his tongue slowly melting into Karissa’s. 

“Erik...we...they’re right downstairs,” she groaned as Erik attached his mouth to the sweet spot of her neck. “Erik,” she repeated, this time it came out as a moan instead of the stern tone she was attempting to use. But her protests were ignored when Erik locked the bathroom door and continued the assault on her neck and collarbone. 

“We won’t get caught if you don’t get loud,” he warned, reaching under her pleated skirt and pulling her underwear down to her ankles. “Think you can do that?” 

“Hell no, E-fuuuuuuck,” Karissa squirmed when Erik’s thumb met her naked clit. He rubbed the nub while he kissed her, silencing any noise threatening to escape. “Just make this quick.” 

“Aight, I was about to be gentle with your little ass but since you wanted to rush me,” Erik teased, pulling Karissa off the counter and turning her so she was facing the mirror. Karissa assumed Erik was about to break her in two with how hard he was holding her hips,but surprisingly he entered her with a gentle push. She gripped the sink, watching Erik in the mirror. That smug smirk was on his face as he began to move his hips, plunging into her wetness and pulling back out. “Whatchu looking at me like that for,” Erik asked, placing a supporting hand on Karissa’s lower back. 

“Because you’re trying to be romantic and shit,” she replied, whining her hips in sync with Erik’s rhythm. “I know you want to fuck my shit up, don’t you?” 

When she got like this usually Erik would shut her up and fuck her hard like she wanted. “Nah, because your ass can’t be quiet. I don’t want your dad coming up here to take me out,” he pressed, pushing Karissa’s head to the marble countertop. 

A loud moan escaped her lips, causing Erik to shush her as he continued digging into her tightness. His warm flesh tapped her’s over and over, creating a light slap paired with their low grunts. “Shit, Erik,” Karissa’s whispered, unable to keep her hips moving when Erik held them in place.

 A knock at the door made them both jump, “Who in there,” grandma Thomas shouted, frantically banging on the door. 

“Shit, shit,” Erik cursed, quickly pulling out and pulling up his sweatpants. “You don’t have a second bathroom in this bitch?” 

“No! Ugh, how are we gonna get out of here without her seeing you,” Karissa whispered loudly. 

“I gotta shit,” the grandmother yelled again. “That damn potato salad ran right through me.” 

“Looks like we are just going out together,” Erik shrugged, opening the door even with Karissa trying to keep it shut. 

“Well I’ll be damned, that’s where you two disappeared off to,” the elder exclaimed. 

Karissa and Erik pushed past her with their heads down in embarrassment and irritation. Neither one of them got a nut and now Grandma Thomas wouldn't let them live this down. 

“Mmmm, that’s the way you mess around and get knocked up. How you think your daddy got here? Me and Gerald had some moments in that bathroom. Whew chile,” she laughed, finally closing the door behind her. 

“I seriously didn’t need to know that,” Karissa gagged. 

“Maybe we can finish what we started in the backseat of my car? I thought I heard your dad ask about some icecream to go with that pie,” Erik suggested, raising a brow.

Thinking about it for a second, Karissa took off down the steps. “Daddy, did you mention icecream? We can go get some.” 

Merry Christmas, folks! 

[logans-chestnuts]

As You Are, Part 7

Pairing: Logan x Reader

Warnings: Language, Smut

Part 6

You finished your work and went home to scavenge some dinner. Logan had brought all of the Chinese food in existence last night so you had leftovers. You sat on the sofa and picked at your food. You hadn’t had lunch and you were hungry but you were dwelling on Logan. Of course. You had thought of little else since you had dumped coffee on him…two days ago? You decided to call it three.

His clock was going to be all screwed up for a day or two so you didn’t expect much more than the occasional text.

You had brought your flowers home with you, feeling ridiculously sentimental about them. Their scent filled your apartment as you nibbled on your dinner and watched Archer.

Your phone rang and you glanced over at it, not really in the mood to chit chat. Until you saw Future Husband light up, then you snatched it up and answered.

“Hey, I didn’t expect to hear from you tonight. How was your flight?”

“Hey, babe. The flight was fine, I caught a few hours of sleep.”

“That’s good. I’m sure you’re used to it but international travel screws my sleep up big time.”

“Still does for me, too. I don’t generally sleep that well any time though, so it isn’t all that different.”

“Did you sleep here?”

“Yeah, actually. Best I’ve slept for a while.”

“Me, too.”

“What are you doing? And what are you wearing?”

“I am eating Chinese leftovers and watching Archer. And oh baby I’m right here on the sofa naked as the day I was born.”

“Really?” he said hopefully.

“No, you dope. Why would I be naked on my sofa home alone?” you laughed.

“A guy can dream.”

“Why would you dream about me home alone eating leftovers in the nude?”

“All I need is the nude part.”

“Are you ever not horny?”

“Umm, select funerals.”

“Oh my God, Logan, only ‘select’ funerals?”

“Grief can be a powerful motivation to fuck.”

“This is not a pretty side of you, babe.”

“Yeah but you love me anyway.”

You squeaked. How embarrassing. “I…don’t know that I precisely love you –”

“Babe!! Joke!”

“Dick.”

“Really? You traded me a bra for a pizza, told me your husband was in special forces, the Ninja turtle thing and just teased me that you were naked and I don’t get one joke?”

“Well not about…that.”

“What, love? Y/N, I know you don’t love me.”

“Oh yeah? How do you know that?”

“Coz we’ve only known each other like a month.”

“Three days, but go on.”

“And it can take months to know for sure you love someone.”

“Or longer, even.”

“And then there’s the year of not wanting to be the first to say it.”

“Sure.”

“Then the fighting starts.”

“You have not had great relationships, have you?”

“No, hell this is all speculation. I’ve never been in love before.”

“Before? You looooooove me!” you sang at him.

“Shut up,” he said, laughing.

“Logan loves me!”

“I’m hanging up.”

“No no no I’ll behave. I got giddy,” you laughed.

“I am gonna have to go soon.”

“Are you in your hotel?”

“Yeah, and I have to shower and go meet with these people and see what went wrong.”

“Sorry your day looks bleak.”

“Hearing your voice helped.”

“Yeah, me too.”

“What did you need help with?”

“Missing your voice,” you said with a smile.

“Awwwww Y/N looooves me,” he sang back at you.

“I’ll probably love you some day,” you said with a laugh.

“Oh?” Logan said after a pause.

“Yeah.”

“Um OK good,” Logan responded lamely. “Hey I need to get ready for work.”

“Have a great day, Logan. I hope whatever the issue is it’s an easy fix.”

“Thanks. Bye.”

“Bye.”

“Way to run him off, Y/N,” you said, smacking yourself in the head.

Logan smacked his head on the wall. “Way to ruin it, dickhead,” he said to himself. He debated calling you back but when he saw the time he knew he had to get to Aoki.

L: I’ll call you later OK?

Y: Yeah

“Shit,” he said. A one word response and no emoji from the perkiest texter on the planet. But he didn’t have time.

Logan laid out an acceptably dark, intimidating suit and easily removed shoes and then took a quick shower, re-playing the conversation in his head and cringing at how he handled you saying something so amazing, cute and sweet. He had knee-jerked to his hit 'em and quit 'em response and his reptile brain had screamed RUN!!! Usually his rational brain, reptile brain and dick were all on the same page, but now there was another player – his heart.

Logan wasn’t sure yet if he was happy with this new team member, but so far his dick and his heart were voting the same.

Logan had been in meetings since 7:30 am and hadn’t even had a bathroom break. It was 12:30 pm now, and he was finally able to step away and dial your number. It rang longer than before.

“Hello,” you said in a sleepy voice.

“Hey, did I wake you?” he asked.

“Yeah, I went to bed early.”

“I’m sorry I was kind of a dick earlier,” he said awkwardly.

“It’s no big deal.”

“No, it is. And…I just wanted to tell you that,” he paused here and took a deep breath, “I probably will, too.”

“Huh?” you were confused and fuzzy-headed from sleep. “You probably will what? Those words don’t –”

“I’ll probably love you!” he interrupted.

“Oh. OH! Um…I think my probably might have just gotten bumped up to pretty sure.” You were grinning.

“I can’t talk long but we’re OK? We’re still…we?”

“I definitely want to be a we with you, Logan Delos.”

“OK good,” Logan replied, a smile on his face and relief in his voice. “Sorry I woke you.”

“I’m not. You can wake me up any time and any way you want.”

“You’ll probably regret that at some point, babe,” he joked.

“I doubt it,” you said softly. “Call when you can, Logan.”

“I will, then. Bye, Y/N.”

“Bye, Logan.”

Logan stood staring at his phone for a moment with a look of confusion. He had never really met anyone who wore their heart on their sleeve like you did. You kept taking him by surprise. When he was with you, Logan was transported to a time when his grandparents were alive and he felt loved and wanted.

And he wondered when it would all come crumbling down.

Angela Bradford Delos was a beautiful, frightening woman. Everyone at Delos Corporate avoided her like the plague when she swept through the building on her way to her husband’s office. It didn’t happen often, to the employees’ general relief, but when it did they all did their very best to blend into the walls.

She reached the top floor and marched to the largest corner office and opened the door without knocking. The secretary had been with James Delos for decades and she had an agreement with her boss that if she didn’t have to tangle with his wife then she wouldn’t quit.

James gestured for the other participants of the meeting that his wife had just ended to leave.

“Angela. Always a pleasure,” he said dryly. “What can I do for you?”

“What is this?” she asked, waving a manilla envelope around as she sat down and crossed her elegantly clad legs.

“That is the report I received on your son’s new plaything. I thought you might be interested.”

“What are you doing to stop it?” Logan was not going to become attached to this woman. Angela required a pedigree for her future daughter-in-law, and he wasn’t going to screw up her plans by getting involved with a worker bee with absolutely no connections. Angela had already sacrificed her Mayflower descendant social status to marry the grandson of an Ellis Island immigrant for his money. Her daughter had defied her and married a middle class upstart. Angela was not going to have her son waste her efforts.

“Aside from her middle class upbringing I was unable to find anything that would deter Logan.”

“Isn’t that enough?” she asked snidely.

“Not for Logan, apparently.”

“What did he say?”

“He was more defensive than usual. Practically radiated anger when I called her a whore,” he said casually, leaning back on his chair.

“You need to fix this, James.”

“I actually thought this might be more in your area of expertise. I sent him on a wild goose chase in Japan. He should be gone at least a week.”

“Fine. If you can’t handle this, I suppose I must.”

“That’s the spirit! Family first, right darling?”

Angela gave him a brittle smile and left with all the drama with which she had entered.

Part 8

@drinix @giggleberts

[chase-brody-protection-squad]

wELL THEN how about Chase x Reader where the reader figures out about what's going on with Stacey and the kids and gets upset with the way Chase is being treated? (Platonic or not, up to you!!!)

hOoOoO bOY hOw’s AbOuT sOmE aNgSt

I never liked Gatwick Airport. Too bright. Too busy. But it was closest to Brighton; and therefore closest to my best friend, Chase Brody.

The little snot moved here from Ireland about a year ago, and I haven’t been able to see him since.

Until one night when he said he really needed me to come. We were Skyping, and in the midst of his usually happy demeanor, he became really sad. When I asked him what was wrong, he just said, “Can you please just come visit me? I just…I really need you right now.”

I stammered. “Y-yeah, sure! I’m off for the weekend, pick me up from Gatwick on Thursday night?”

He nodded, and faced away from the camera for a moment.

“Chase?“ 

“I will. Thanks, Y/n.”

Call Ended.

“Anytime…?”

I heaved my luggage from the claim, and headed towards the exit. 

There he was, in his trademark snapback, holding up a sign that said, “Biggest Dork Ever” on it. Once he spotted me, though, the sign dropped to one side. He ran to me, making me drop everything and enveloping me in a giant bear hug. “I can’t believe it. You’re here. You actually came.”

His strong arms held me close, pressing our bodies together. I hugged him back, although a little confused. “Of course, why wouldn’t I?”

I could feel his smile on my shoulder. “Thank you.” He muttered, ignoring my question. 

Chase released me and picked up my bags. Smiling, he nodded his head toward the exit and I followed him out to a shiny black Ford F-150. “Dang, Chase, you got a truck? I always imagined you as a Prius kinda guy,” I teased.

He laughed. “That’s precious, but no. I’ve always wanted a truck. Hop in, and I’ll put your bags in the back.”

I obeyed, and headed to the passenger side. I heard thumps of varying volume and footsteps approaching. Chase grabbed my door handle and opened it. “M'lady,” he said in a deep voice. 

I giggled and got in.

On our way to Brighton, Chase didn’t talk much. He asked me what life was like without him, and how I ever got by. I responded with a quick arm slug. He let me talk, though, and I told him all that had happened to me in the past year. I’d gotten a new job, finally moved out of the flat I’d shared with two other girls, and moved into my own apartment.

Not everything was hunky-dory, though. My boyfriend, Aidan, had hit me after a huge fight we’d had, and I’d left him. “And I’ve been single since.” I finished.

Chase’s hands tightened on the wheel and his eyebrows furrowed. “I hated that son of a bitch anyway. He didn’t deserve you.”

Well, that came out of nowhere. “Chase, you barely knew him. You didn’t have much time for me when you were planning on leaving Athlone. You had to move to Brighton for your job. I’m over it, promise.”

His vise grip on the steering wheel loosened slightly, but he was far from relaxed. “I just hate it…when people you thought you loved and trusted…just rip your heart out…” He almost whispered he last part as we drove into Brighton.

“What do you mean? Did something happen?” I asked, suddenly worried.

Chase’s eyes widened. “No! No, everything’s fine, I’m just trying to relate to you a bit.”

I wasn’t convinced. “Chase, dude, what’s wrong? Why did you need me to come?”

“We’ll be at my flat in a minute. I’ll tell you everything there,” His voice wavered, and I could tell he was holding back tears. He’s not very good at it. I saw one slip down his cheek, and, lightning fast, he swiped it away. “Sorry, I’m just…really glad you’re here.”

I dropped it for the moment, and decided to admire the twinkling lights of Brighton at night. The seemingly starless sky gave way to millions of different colors and sizes of lights. I liked it. I’d always wanted to move to a bigger city. Athlone wasn’t a small town by no means, but it had nothing on Brighton.

A short and quiet while later, we pulled up to a small, eggshell white complex. Chase didn’t say anything, he just smiled at me, got out, and went to the back of the truck. I opened my door and let my feet gently touch the pavement. “This is nice,” I commented.

Chase smiled again, hoisting my bags from the bed. “Yeah, it’s not much, but it’s enough.”

I nodded and got my things from inside the truck. Chase caught up to me and I motioned for him to lead the way.

After a couple of flights of stairs, Chase fished keys from his pocket and unlocked a door near the stairwell. 

The apartment was immaculate. I stepped in, took my shoes off and padded across the soft carpet leading into a small living space. “Wow, Stacy must’ve cleaned, haha.” I joked, looking at him in the doorway.

He froze for a moment. “Y-yeah,” he stammered. “She likes the place." 

I could see why. The apartment may have been small, but the natural light coming from a giant bay window and sparse furniture more than made up for it.

"So where is she?" 

Chase stopped in the entrance to the living room. "Who?”

I rolled my eyes. “Y'know, Stacy, your WIFE. And where’s Mariah and Cody?”

Of all the things that I could’ve expected from him at the moment, laughing, an explanation, et cetera, literally falling by to his knees and crying wasn’t one of them. “Chase!”

I rushed over to him. He held his head in his hands, elbows resting on blue flamingo shorts and fingers pushing his snapback up. He was crying, hard. “She-she-oh, god fuck, Y/n, I’m so sorry.”

I wedged my hands between his hands and his face and pushed them away, grabbing his cheeks and forcing him to look at me. “Chase, what’s the real reason why I’m here?”

His terrified sky blue eyes searched my face for any sort of ill intent, and found none. “Stacy left me.”

That bitch. That fucking bitch. “I’m gonna fucking kill her.” I said, releasing his face and storming to the door to grab the keys.

Chase grabbed my forearm. “Y/n, please, don’t. It’s gonna be hard enough to fight for my kids.”

My hand clenched the keys so hard they left imprints when I threw them back onto the table by the door. “How could she do this?! Chase, why didn’t you just tell me over Skype the other night?” I asked angrily, but not at him.

His eyes widened in fear. He probably thought I was mad at him. “I just didn’t want you to worry all week. I’m sorry.”

 "Take your shoes off.“ I demanded.

 "What?”

 "Take your damn shoes off, Chase.“

He stilled for a moment, then did as I asked. I grabbed his hand and led him to the couch. I sat down and opened my arms. "Come on." 

A confused and flustered look passed over his face as he realized what I meant.

"Stop being weird and sit down.”

Slowly but surely, he eased himself into my lap, draping his legs over mine and resting his head on my shoulder.

“Now cry.”

He looked up at me, our faces inches apart. “What?”

“You’re keeping that emotion pent up. Cry, dammit. I’m not gonna judge.” I said.

He stared into my eyes and I saw his well up with tears. His head returned to my shoulder as he began to let out racking, heartbreaking sobs. One arm went behind my back and around my waist, the other wrapped around my neck.

He cried for quite a while, soaking the right shoulder of my shirt with tears. I didn’t give a shit. I just held him there.

Holding him in my arms, I began to notice how small his frame was. He just seemed so fragile, so breakable.

I couldn’t believe she’d done this to him. He loved his kids to death, would die before he let anything happen to them. She’d taken the best things in his life away,  and now he was broken. I hope I’d never see her again, because if I did, Chase would never see his kids again. I desperately wanted to give her a piece of my mind, but I needed to cool down before I dealt with her. 

That would take a long fucking time.

Chase’s cries turned to sniffles, and he raised his head again. His eyes were bloodshot, and he looked more pale than usual, if that were possible. “I’m sorry,” he muttered.

I hugged him tightly. “You have absolutely fucking nothing to be sorry for. I’m going to absolutely kill Stacy." 

He shook his head. "I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want you in the middle of all of this. I didn’t want you to suddenly pause your life because I’m having a crisis.”

I grabbed his face with both of my hands. “Chase, I’m your best friend. You know I’d do anything for you.”

Suddenly, he grasped me, hard. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled. “It’s just, I haven’t held someone in so long.”

“When did she leave you?”

“About four months ago." 

Four months?! "Chase!”

“I know, I know, but it wasn’t really final until about two weeks ago. That’s when I finally started to break down.”

I shook my head. “You’re insane.”

He chuckled. “I know.”

I leaned back a bit and he raised his head. “You know I love you, right?”

He nodded. “I love you, too,” he said, but sounded unsure of himself.

I looked at him with mock suspicion. “That didn’t sound very convincing, Chase." 

"I-I mean I love you, but not in the way you love me.” 

My heart stopped. “What-what are you saying?”

Chase looked down. “I mean, I love you, but I mean that I want to be with you every second of my life. I want to hold you, I want you to help me, I want nothing more than to just be with you. I want to wake up next to you, I want to make breakfast for you, I want to show you off to the world because you're so beautiful and I need you so much that I can’t help myself.” He finished his little monologue and got off of my lap and turned away from me. “I understand if you want to leave. I’ll drive you back to Gatwick if you need it.”

I stood up, already missing his warmth. “Chase, look at me.”

He did. He looked so afraid, like he’d just fucked everything up. 

I wrapped my arms around his neck, brought him close, and placed my lips on his.

He froze, then tentatively put his hands just above my hips. He kissed me back, desperately, like I was the buoy he needed in his rough waters.

Right then, I knew where I belonged. I belonged here, with my best friend turned lover, the absolute happiest I’d ever been. Fuck Athlone. I was never leaving him again. 

[creativeashproductions]

Anguish // Bucky Barnes

Summary: AU where Reader is an FBI Agent and best friends with Detective Nat Romanoff. Everything changes when Bucky and the reader meet each other. Soon Nat has to decide what’s more important…her happiness or her best friend.

Characters: agent!reader x detective!bucky, Natasha Romanoff, Sam Wilson, Steve Rogers x nurse!Sharon, Wanda x Vision, Pietro Maximoff (mentioned), Nick Fury (mentioned), and Peggy Carter (mentioned)

Words: 2692

Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel or the characters involved. This is also an AU in which the Avengers are actually detectives.

Warnings: Swearing, talk of death, injuries, infertility by car accident, PTSD (mentioned), and ANGST with just a hint of fluff.

Author: Caitsy

A/N: to hold you over till Sunday, April 23rd when I will be finished packing for home! Requests will be OPEN ON SUNDAY

Snapchat to see what’s coming next: caitsyandash

Master List

Prompt List

ASK US A QUESTION LIST

Normally it should be one the happiest days to watch your best friend get married but for Natasha it was the exact opposite. You had been best friends since you were roommates during your police academy days having bonded as the daughters of former officers. When you went to different cities for jobs you had kept in contact and celebrated when Nat made detective and you worked your ass up into the FBI. She was so happy when you took your two weeks off following a botched operation landing you with a bullet to the shoulder.

During those two weeks you had met one of Nat’s co-workers and friend Bucky Barnes at a game night. It was held at Steve Rogers house in Brooklyn, he was a recently transferred detective from Bucky’s childhood, and Steve’s wife Sharon. Sharon was an ER nurse going back to school to become a Doctor. Nat had straight away invited you over not expecting to have you bond so well with everyone.

“I’m Y/N Y/L/N-“

“Agent Y/L/M, dumbs.” Nat laughed poking you in the side. You giggled.

“I’m an FBI agent. I’m on medical leave, got shot chasing a drug dealer.” You laughed nodding to the sling holding your left arm.

“I’m Steve Rogers. Transferred Detective, this is mine and my wife’s home. Sharon’s finishing her shift at the hospital.”

“I’m James Barnes but you can call me Bucky.” A man with brunette hair and piercing blue eyes smiled from his spot, “Steve’s partner.”

“Sam Wilson.”

“Nat’s partner right?” You questioned. 
“Yeah ever since this ass dumped me for his best friend.” Sam teased pushing Steve a little. Steve chuckled shaking his head in response.”

“Wanda and Vision can’t make it. They have parent teacher interviews with their son Pietro.”

“Not to mention tomorrow is the sixth anniversary of Wanda’s brother Pietro’s death.” Sam sighed, “Damn I miss that idiot.”

Everyone was sitting around a table filled with drinks and snacks as they each decided to play a board game with set rules that were based around a drinking game. You bowed up playing due to the medication you were prescribed for the wound and you noticed that Bucky wasn’t playing either.

“You aren’t playing?” You questioned leaning back.

“No…uh…I can’t.” He said nodding to the couch, “I got back from war three years ago. Suffered from PTSD and I self mediated using alcohol. Nat finally got me to see the therapist at the police department. Bruce Banner and we worked out a plan.”

“Are you an alco-“

“No. I came close so I’ve sworn off alcohol until Dr. Banner and I feel like it’s safe.” Bucky admitted, “I don’t usually tell people this.”

“I can’t drink because of medication.” You sighed nodding to your wound.

The week after meeting everyone Bucky asked you out and you couldn’t resist him so you began to see each other. The day you were leaving to go back to work he dropped you off at the airport, Nat was working and he had the day off, and you became official. You both kept the relationship to yourselves for the first couple of months until you decided to transfer to the New York FBI office once you both found it hard to celebrate your first anniversary with work schedules.

Splitting time between Washington, DC and New York City became a hassle so when you were together for almost a year and half Bucky asked you to move in with him with a key and a ring.

“We’ve been together for over a year and we’ve been talking about our future. So will you my best friend, confidant, and love of my life marry me? Move in with me and let’s tell everyone. We can find a house to move in after the wedding and begin our life, so will you become my wife?” Bucky asked opening the ring box during the dinner in your apartment in Washington.

The proposal was simply asked because Bucky wasn’t one to get really emotional. It wasn’t his nature or personality and the amount of decorating he had done to your apartment made up for it. 
“Of course!” You exclaimed hugging him tight. The ring was exactly what you had dreamed of and he knew you so well. Beside it was a key to his apartment.

A few days into moving in together you had called Nat to let her know you were in the city and she had jumped for lunch. She wanted to tell you something important too. She was excited to tell you that she was planning to ask someone out from work. She had fallen hard for his eyes and humour along with a shared interest.

“Y/N!” Nat exclaimed pulling you for a hug at the nice restaurant owned by your mutual friend Vision and his wife Wanda.

“Oh my god!” You responded hugging your best friend tight, “I think this calls for some wine.”

Nat agreed as you sat down catching up as you chose what you wanted to eat. You both knew what you wanted  but it was tradition to choose a desert to share at the end and you never got the same desert.

“Thank you.” You both said handing the menus to the waiter.

“So how long are you staying?” Nat asked taking a sip of her wine.

“That’s the thing. I moved here two days ago, I’ve been settling in and I had taking a tour of the office.” You smiled as Nat’s grin grew larger and larger. She could act anyway with you and you couldn’t care which made her comfortable.

“Are you serious?! Oh my god!” Nat exclaimed as she blushed with her news.

“What about you? You sounded excited when I called.”

“I fell for someone recently and I’ve decided to ask them out.”

“Ooh! Tell me more. Who is he? Someone I know.” You teased her, “I never fought I would see the day that Natasha Romanoff would fall in love.”

“Shut up.” She giggled, “You do know him and I’m not telling until I know if he’ll go out with me!”

“You know how I mentioned I was seeing someone for the past year and I’ve kept quiet about it for personal reasons?”

“Yeah?”

“We’re engaged!”

Nat’s jaw dropped in shock as the news sunk in, she had no idea you and this guy were this serious. It didn’t stop her from squealing and pulling you into a tight hug. She gasped at the gorgeous ring settled at home on your left hand.

“Oh my god!”

“We’re having an engagement party tomorrow at Steve’s place, when I accidentally let it slip to Sharon she demanded that it happen at the Roger’s home.”

Nat was late to the party from processing a young woman she arrested on her way back to the precinct. She had been trailing the girl ever since Sam and her had figured out she was the one responsible for killing the prostitutes because her husband left her after a string of hookups. The woman snapped and killed the females she believed took her husband.

“Sorry we’re late!” Nat announced hanging her coat up in the closet like Steve had always asked her to do.

“No problem Nat.” You grinned pressing a kiss to Nat’s cheek, “Bucky and I are happy you could make it!”

Nat’s stomach dropped when Bucky’s arm came around your waist with a loving gaze resting on the side of your head. Her breathing quickened as the heartbreak began inside her and everyone was unaware of it happening. Before the tears could be seen Nat straightened her spine and placed a guarded expression on.

“Congrats!” The words were bitter on her tongue but she couldn’t help but hate you a little bit.

This was the final nail in the coffin of her believe that she didn’t deserve love or happiness. Every relationship burnt her in the end from the man that left her because the danger she faced. Her first serious boyfriend had dumped her because it wasn’t working out and her last girlfriend dumped her because she found out she was straight.

Nat had a rough life from the moment her father died in accident on duty when her mother was six months pregnant. The shooter hadn’t been found and was probably well respected for killing a successful senior detective. Nat’s mom died in childbirth from unexpected complications leaving her to be passed around family members until she was one. She was then placed in a bad orphanage that sold children to desperate parents. It wasn’t until her adopted father Nick Fury and his wife Peggy were on their honeymoon did they stumble upon the orphanage when the head of it was arrested.

They saw little two year old Nat with her fiery red hair and big innocent green eyes standing with a ratty stuffed bunny with tears rolling down her dirty face. Nick immediately knew she was the child he wanted. Peggy was unable to have biological children and she wasn’t full ready to have kids so soon. They had only gotten married for god sake.

The first decade of being adopted by the Fury-Carter couple was happy with training in different kinds of martial arts and languages. Nick was extremely caring for his little girl while Peggy was more distant. It wasn’t until Nat was thirteen did Peggy grow closer to her daughter. It came to shattering stop on Nat’s fourteenth birthday when Peggy and her were coming home from Nat’s ballet recital did their lives change forever. Nick was working when he got the call from the hospital.

He rushed to the hospital where his wife was laying waiting to be identified officially, she had died on impact. Seven hours Nick waited in the waiting room as his only child and the apple of his eye battled for her life. His little girl died on the operating table twice before she was stabilized and resting in her room.

“Mr. Fury? I’m Dr. Charles. I have some news.” The female doctor said motioning to the seat, “Your wife died on impact when the truck slammed into her side of the car. In the few seconds before the car was t-boned she shifted to take most of the force. This saved your daughter from dying, this is what we see in a lot of car accidents. The parent instinctively moves to protect their child even if they don’t think about it. It was reflex.”

“She does.” Fury breathed as he tearily focused on his wife’s smile in a memory, “How’s Nat?”

“Natasha suffered internal bleeding, a broken ankle, her spleen ruptured, multiple broken ribs, the other ribs are bruised, her right arm is shattered from her elbow and down. That’s not all.” Dr. Charles said scrolling through her tablet.

“There’s more.” Fury mumbled.

“Natasha turned to see her mother and the force caused whiplash but we lost her twice during surgery and we were unable to repair her uterus fully. The trauma had caused Natasha to become infertile.”

Nick was never the same following the day. He focused solely on work and hired nanny’s to care for his daughter. It tore Natasha up when Nick turned his back on her and she in turn focused on getting on with her life.

Natasha standing by the door of your wedding suite watched as your cousin and you mom helped you into your wedding dress. It was a gorgeous dress that fit you perfectly and quite stunningly like it had been sewn and designed specifically for you. Which was also sold cheap because your rich aunt was a close friends with a ton of high class fashion designers, closest with Vera Wang herself.

“Oh baby.” Mrs. Y/L/N cried pressing a kiss to your cheek.

“Mom!” You giggled, “I’m only getting married!”

Nat hid the bitter smile before it could appear and instead focused on tying the lace ribbon that would keep her heels on. She spent her time in the sidelines unable to fully commit to the duties of being your best friend and in the fairytale emotions you didn’t notice. Your cousin however caught on pretty quick.

“Hey Nat! One of your curls isn’t sitting right.” Mary said walking over, “I’ll let Auntie help Y/N and I quickly put that into place.”

“Thank you.”

“You won’t if you mess anything up on this day. I know your legs are begging for Bucky’s face between them but if you even think about ruining anything I will end you.”

“Threatening a police officer?” Nat glared refusing to take off her smile.

“Oh no sweetheart. You didn’t know? My Dad is pretty high up the chain in politics. One call and I can end your career and push you into the need of prostitution and even then…nobody will want anything to do with you scantily clad broke ass.” Mary hissed fixing the hair that was already perfect, “There you go! Y/N! We’re ready!”

“Oh my god.” You gasped as your Dad got up from his seat on the couch, “It’s time. I’m going to throw up.”

“Maybe your best friend and number one shipper of your relationship has some encouraging words!” Mary fakery smiled at Nat, “Right Natasha?”

“Y/N, you’ll do fine. This is the best day of your life and it’s the same for Bucky. Nothing will go wrong.” Nat said feeling the inner depression at losing even the smallest chance with Bucky.

“Ain’t you a sweetheart!” Mary giggled patting Nat’s hand, “Okay places people!”

“This day is the rest of the my life and in a year Bucky and I will be hopefully pregnant with our first-“ “Bucky wants kids?” Natasha gasped shocked.

“Yeah. We already have names picked out, he’s really excited. We bought a house in Brooklyn just a couple blocks from Steve and Sharon.”

Natasha felt even worse as the words settled uneasily inside her. When the group, before Y/N met everyone, the conversation of children came up. Bucky had told the group that he would never have kids in the world that was terrible. That sparked a fire inside Nat that would build over the years they knew each other.

The wedding was beautiful with the warm love between Bucky and Y/N Barnes lighting up the entire venue. Nat was itching to talk to Bucky, screw Y/N. The girl got everything in life without much trouble while Nat only had Bucky to lean on. Nat could settle with being the mistress if Bucky wanted, besides Y/N wouldn’t have to know.

“Don’t.” Mary said taking a sip from her flute of champagne.

“I-“

“You were. I meant what I side. Get it through your red skull you bitch. You had your chance since you met him and he probably didn’t even really talk to you. He wants children with Y/N. I think it’s time you left the party and maybe even the city. Start fresh.”

Nat watched as Bucky snuck up on you to wrap his arms tightly around you and playfully nip at your neck. Pushing past her emotions Nat saw the light blaring full blast in Bucky’s eyes and that was something she hadn’t seen since they’re first day on the job. Your smile was larger than life and she knew right there what she had to do.

“You’re right.” Nat bit her lip getting red lipstick on her front teeth, “I can’t live my life watching her be happy with him like I should have been.”

“Good answer. Your bags are packed from the cabin and waiting in a limo. Break your phone please on your way and don’t come back to the city.”

Nat flashed a smile towards the happy newlywed couple before two larger men walked in front of her. When they passed fully you and Bucky could no longer see even the glimpse of the redheaded woman in your lives. She was gone in a blink of an eye leaving only memories in her wake.

Forever Tag List: Ask us to be tagged or removed!

@cityofsobbingfangirls @tas898 @barbidollash @trustnobodyshootfirst@winchesterfanfiction @deanwinchesterisamazing @oh-my-hecky-padalecki@padackles2010 @msimpala67 @deangirl5509 @heyitssilverwolf @therealme13posts@petlaufeyson @professionally-crazed @winterhurricane @tearsandbloodofmyenemies@blackwidow-romanoff @crazybarnes @marvelofcourse @takemetothefictionalworld @destiel67bellarke @ohmy-sammy @fightinthepain @vivabucky @waituntilthedustsettles @daydreaming1393 @cumonbucky @inhumans-of-shield @basicwhiskeyprincesss @soulfull-ofevans @spookass @glitterintheairblog @girl-with-wild-dreams @frickin-bats@darkestgrungeuniverse @shamvictoria11 @buckyappreciationsociety @sammysgirl1997@fly-f0rever @archer-whovian-violinist @jenn0755 @anamarieswift2194 @unicornofdanger@ifyoudie @jealousbitxh @stormin-thru-glitter @sparklyaura @stilescstilinski @curlyxtomato @katshrev @its-sanaa-k @theoismydad @im-a-light-child @tmriddler @flirtswithdanger @divide-supermarketflowers

Marvel Taglist:

@bellastellaluna @crownie-sr @casismyguardianangel @kitschkylo @hollycornish @katiedreamy