#oh no gun started crying and so did we
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How dare they...Make us wait two weeks! Here is something that will hopefully help with the drought...
Welcome to our new Podcast Back to OG where we Critically Discuss OffGun's latest show Cooking Crush. Please note we are reacting to the Uncut version of the show.
Be sure to join us on Twitter or Tumblr @criticallyobs.
Thanks for keeping us company - Z and M xoxo
Cooking Crush Playlist
Last Twilight Playlist
Dangerous Romance Playlist
Potential Obsessions Playlist
#critical obsession podcast#spotify#podcast#cooking crush the series#offgun#off jumpol#gun atthaphan#ŕ¸ŕ¸ŕ¸ŕ¸ŕ¸#cooking crush episode 5#ten x prem#firedynamite#who is the bestest boy and why is it ten?#oh no gun started crying and so did we#prem broke my heart and ten made me emotional#i can't wait for the fluffy love#i seem to have gotten lost in the tags again#what will we do with ourselves next week?#critical discussion#Spotify
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THE p-51D. THE mustang. THE jacket. okay. (Thanks to @sassenach082 for letting me know how close i was to planes of fame!!)
#blocked out my face so i donât have to delete these ones#ignore the fit i didnât know we were going#did i cry? oh god. yeah#. i did.#if you had told me seven months ago when i first started writing my 200k icemav fanfic#with the scene where ice & mav are in the hangar with this plane#that i would eventually get to like. Be here. i wouldâve screamed#âate tom cruise. love âis plane. simple as.#this museum fucking rules btw ill post more pics later#top gun maverick#pete maverick mitchell#top gun#military aviation#top gun bts
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Iâm moving out in five weeks and last night I snapped at my roommate who had been a dick to me all year (for something reasonable and justifiable) and ik I shouldnât feel bad but I totally do lol
All year has been the oppression Olympics any time any of us is upset about anything and like.. I reminded him last night that he isnât the only minority in the apartment and he was pissed
#for context he is a white gay trans man#so Iâm not in any way denying that his life is objectively difficult and that there are obstacles that none of us can relate to#but oh my GOD itâs frustrating when any of us are upset about something and he brings up transphobia#like actually- no- you donât understand what itâs like to be yelled at on the bus by a racist and then feel fear when he follows you off#when the school shooting happened this year I was crying (BECAUSE IM A PUBLIC SCHOOL EDUCATOR) and he started telling me how I was playing#the victim when the real victim was trans people and how I donât have anything to be afraid of unlike the trans people who are going#to have this spun as a story about how they are all violent bc of T#like.. my brother⌠kids in my district have died to gun violence THIS YEAR#I had a kid go missing for a week due to gang violence and cried about it#yeah teachers are allowed to be scared and cry over a school shooting even if it was a trans guy who did it#every time I talk about Taylor swift he tells me to shut the fuck up because Iâm annoying but he will talk about punk music for literal hour#he makes fun of anything traditionally feminine and I understand a lot of that is his own struggle with gender dysphoria but⌠câmon man#anyway last night we were joking about all moving to Idaho bc we were looking at Idaho rent and itâs like $3.50 for a five bedroom house lol#and he butts in- unprompted- that he couldnât move there because he would have no rightsâŚ#like .. ok?? we were joking obviously#but I was being a bitch and said âyeah none of us would except for (cis white male roomate who thought it was funny)#in reference to roe v wade getting overturned#he gets so many any time anyone brings up roe v wade as an example of rights and bodily autonomy being stripped away#and gets mad when any of the cis female roomates talk about it as if itâs not a legitimate concern#oh heâs fine talking all the time about all the states he canât live in because heâs trans but the second a cis girl reminds him that#we are also losing bodily autonomy he gets angry and insists itâs not the same#youâre right - itâs not the same- but dude you arenât the only one who has to fear for your rights being removed!!!#like bruh how are you going to look at a mixed race lesbian woman and say I donât understand oppression#he also gets really pissy when we talk about alcoholism because his father was an alcoholicâŚ. THREE of us had alcoholic fathers who either#died or left or became so physically inept due to alcoholism that they canât form a complete sentence or thought#but HE gets to be the arbitrator on dad trauma for reasons I guess???#ugh idk itâs just so frustrating#idk idk Iâm just frustrated
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Danny and Ellie are forced to flee Amity Park. And find themselves in Coast City.
I started writing this with the intention of only writing a short prompt, but then I just kept going until I felt like Iâd written enough.
Danny gets caught up in yet another fight with Skulker, only this time it wasnât because Skulker had come for Danny. No. Heâd come for Ellie. And she was already weak from fleeing the GIW who had shot at her the moment she arrived in Amity Park.
Whether Skulker is after Ellie for Vlad, or because he wants her pelt can be up to you.
Either way, he manages to beat Skulker and captures him in the thermos. Just as he lets out a long sigh of relief he hears the sound of an ecto-gun being fired and then his side is burning and heâs falling. Heâs falling too fast and it hurts and he canât stop-
Danny guys the ground hard. His head is spinning, his skin feels like itâs burning, and he can hear the stomping of feet as someone runs towards him.
He needs to get up. He needs to get away. Find Ellie and make sure sheâs safe. Heâs needs to MOVE- but he canât. Black spots for his vision as he manages to stand up and his eyes meet the end of his motherâs gun.
Before anyone can speak, heâs falling again, handing face first in the dirt. And the familiar feeling of de-transforming washes over him.
The last thing he hears before loosing consciousness is the grief stricken sound of his parentâs voice as three voices shout in unison.
âOH MY GOD DANNY!â
âDANNY ARE YOU OKAY?!â
âNO, GET AWAY FROM HIM!â
When Danny wakes up again, heâs in his room, the curtains are drawn but he can see the sliver of sunlight pouring in through the gap underneath. He notes that his body aches, but not as much as usual after a fight like that. And thereâs a warmth enveloping his hand. Itâs soothing, and he almost considers going back to sleep when he notices that thereâs a ghost in the room. And all too fast heâs sitting up and staring into the exhausted, red, puffy eyes of his mother looking back at him from where sheâs sitting holding his hand in hers.
Just behind her he sees Ellie floating just above the ground talking quietly with his dad.
âDanny,â his motherâs voice draws his attention along with Jack and Ellieâs. âHow are you feeling, sweetheart? Are you in any pain?â
He didnât notice when sheâd helped him to lay back down again. âDo you need anything? Ellie here was just telling us about how regular pain medication doesnât work as well for the two of you. But Iâm sure we could find something for you that might-â
âMom,â Danny rasps. Man his throat was dry.
As if reading him mind Ellie appears by his motherâs side holding out a glass of water with a straw in it. Maddie helps Danny to sit up a little more so he can drink.
âMom,â he tries again, sounding better this time, âIâm okay. I promise. Itâs not that bad!â He starts to lie as the panic sets in. He de-transformed in front of them. He knows he did. And the fear shows on his face, it must, because before he can even begin trying to think up an excuse his mother is crying.
âOh Danny, itâs okay. We know. And weâre not angry at you. We love you. So much.â
And Dannyâs heart swells at hearing it. âYou donât hate me for being Phantom?â He asks quietly.
âNo! We could never hate you Dann-o!â His dadâs cheery tone doesnât disguise the sadness and guilt etched into his face. âWeâre justâŚso sorry that we never noticed before. And that weâŚâ he canât finish his sentence but he doesnât need to. Danny already knows what heâs apologise for.
âIâm okay. I promise. I heal fast!â Danny tied to reassure them.
It seems to help a little, though his parents still have a grim look in their eyes. As they make connections in just how Danny would know that about himself.
And Ellie, with perfect timing to cut the tension, announces happily, âDanny! Good news! Your parents said I could stay with you!â
Ellie had told his parents while Danny was unconscious about being his clone. She saw how they fretted over Danny, cleaning and dressing his injuries with the love and care she only imagined from a parent that truly loves you. And they had accepted her almost right away. Jack even crying as he proudly declared himself a father of three.
Jack soon excused himself, saying heâll go see if Jazz needs any help with cooking lunch. Danny and his mother share a look, and with a final kiss to his head says sheâll go make sure nothing gets brought back to life. And she asks Ellie to please make sure Danny stays in bed and rests.
Danny and Ellie are left alone in his room, and it gives Danny the chance to really revel in everything. His parents accept him. They love him, both sides of him. And they accepted Ellie too! And said she can stay! She doesnât have to be alone anymore.
Now, a lot can happen in the span of a few seconds, let alone minutes. In the time it took for Maddie to reach the kitchen, their front door was kicked down and a group of GIW agents had stormed in demanding they hand over the ectoplasmic scum they were harbouring.
Jack and Maddie drew their weapons and planted themselves directly in front of the GIW agents. The agents state that a ghost shield was put up around the house to prevent any ghosts from escaping, and by law any ghosts within the premises were ti be handed over for destruction immediately. Jazz runs upstairs to Dannyâs room to warn them that the GIW were inside the house and that they needed to run. They need to get to the portal NOW.
With all the authority of an older sister Jazz tells Ellie to grab the go bag Danny had insisted on having prepared, and picks Danny up despite his protests that he could walk. Or well, fly. Ellie turns them all invisible and intangible and takes them down to the lab.
They can hear the sound of shouting, and something breaking and a gun being fired all coming from upstairs as Jazz opens the portal for Danny and Ellie.
Another shot rings out. And then another, and more shouting.
âQuickly you two need to go!â
Another shot.
âArenât you coming with us?â Danny, now Phantom, asks suddenly as he and Ellie are preparing to enter the Ghost Zone.
Two more shots.
âSomeone needs to be here to deactivate the portal in case the guys in white make it down here. Iâll be fine. Mom and dad will be okay, theyâre not here for us so you two need to go. Now!â Thereâs banging on the labâs door and Jazz shoves both Danny and Ellie into the portal. The last thing Danny hears before the portal closes behind them is another shot being fired.
Danny is scared and angry as he and Ellie are forced to fly through the zone with no currently known way to get back to his family. He needs to make sure theyâre okay. He needs to protect them.
But right now Danny is still hurt, and he needs to get himself and Ellie somewhere safe. They begin to slowly make their way through the zone, looking for somewhere to rest and avoiding any ghosts that might want to pick a fight.
Ellie isnât sure how long she and Danny have been moving for. It feels like it could have been days, or hours, or even minutes. But Danny canât fly as quickly right now. Heâs trying to keep a brave face for Ellieâs sake but she can see the exhaustion beginning to take hold of him.
So Ellie makes the executive decision to touch down somewhere to rest. She tells Danny sheâs tired. Danny knows she isnât and itâs only because sheâs worried and wants him to rest. So he goes along with it and they make their way to the next floating island they come across and thank the ancients itâs empty. The two halfas touch down and Danny slumps over as he sits against a nearby rock. Ellie pulls out some energy bars that were tucked away in the go bag and hands one over to Danny.
They do this a few times, stopping to rest, as they gradually make their way to the Far Frozen. Ellie had insisted on going there, Frostbite would know what to do, and he would be able to help Danny with his injuries that had started bleeding again in all the commotion of escaping, and then flying and hiding from ghosts known to attack Danny regularly.
But unfortunately luck is not on their side yet again as a natural portal rips open directly in front of them, and closes behind them after spitting them out in a city they didnât recognise.
Thatâs how Danny and Ellie find themselves in Coast City, hiding out in an old warehouse by the docs while Danny heals and they figure out how theyâre going to get back home.
That is, until now.
Danny stares up at his little sister and sighs with the resigned tone of an exasperated older sibling.
âEllie,â he takes a breath, âwhat did you do?â
âIâm my defence,â Ellie glares up at Green Lantern, who has Ellie scruffed by the back of her hoodie, before looking back at Danny, âI simply do not vibe with the law.â
#dp x dc#dc x dp#dpxdc#dcxdp#green lantern#Hal Jordan#Danny phantom#Danny Fenton#Ellie phantom#Ellie Fenton#good parents Jack and Maddie#good Fenton parents#Ellie was just getting some food#she didnât expect someone to try to rob her!#and she didnât mean to punch him that hate she was just scared and needed to get back to her brother#Hal has no idea whatâs going on#one kid punched a guy hard enough to knock him through a wall#and the other is very clearly injured and also very exhausted by the other kids antics#siblings he guesses#homeless ones at that#and then he noticed the black hair and blue eyes and realises that oh no#he canât let Batman find out about these kids
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Can we have a part 2 Deadpool reader with the boys and maybe soldier boy tooââ if you want to of course
áśť đ đ° .á The Boys x Deadpool!Reader
t/w: loooots of dark humour/jokes, reader's origin will be explained underneath, reader is still an asshole lol that comes with the character, mention about killing,death,gore, weed, drugs, Reader is gn!!!
áŻâ
here's a version with the seven, kiss kiss <3
Origin:
Quick summary, when you were born, your parents had agreed with Vought to have you be pumped full of Compound V so you could grow up and be a hero working under them, but the problem was when you were around 7, they changed their mind so Vought ended up sending several people to come to your house to settle the matter.
Your whole family was massacred in the living room during thanksgiving and when they tried to capture you. You were able to run away. Homeless and living on the street, you grew up in a life of crime, depending on nobody but yourself. Make sense? No? Good! Let's start now.
BUTCHER
To him, you were like a fly that won't leave him alone.
How he knew you was through Mallory, she thought you were okay and fit for the job since you hated Vought just as much.
Obviously he didn't like you once you were introduced to him and the two (M.M and Frenchie)
"No way am I lettin' a supe join us"
":("
Though after what happened to Mallory's grandchildren, the gang pretty much dispersed but wherever Butcher went, you followed. Since he was the only person you trusted... and also enjoy annoying the shit out of.
He'd head inside a club, relieved he hadn't seen you for the past few days so he decided to grab a drink by the bar to unwind.
"Whiskey" He said with his eyes looking around, paranoia shown on his face.
Once his drink was served, he would look back to find your eyes smiling at him, you were wearing a bartender disguise over your red suit.
"Did you miss me?"
"Oh christ..."
When you heard word that he was gathering back the team, you had to be there. What kind of friend would you be if you didn't?
Undoubtedly he had to admit, there were times where he was grateful to have you on the team but there were also other times he regretted it.
For example, that time when you guys needed to sneak into a lab to get something and the goal was to stay quiet but even that simple rule was hard for you to follow.
"Room's up ahead. (Y/N) I need you toâ"
"Heads up!" You said as you threw a bomb at the metal door.
The explosion causing the alarm to turn on and it had the whole lab now on high alert. You shrug innocently when Butcher glared at you like he wanted to tear you apart.
Also, you enjoy constantly pissing him off. You can't die so you don't really care if he'll kill you for it.
"Maybe, if you didn' press the fuckin' button, we wouldn't have to come bac' to save yer ass from the guards"
"OOH GOD SAVE THE QUEEEN!! Please, cry me a fucking river. I got us the target didn't I?"
"He's dead"
"Well you weren't being specific when you said to capture him"
But it's fine, all his frustration will be solved once he uses you as bait. He knows you can't die but hey, it makes him feel slightly better watching you get shot at.
Despite your ups and downs, he appreciates you. When the team would turn against him on his insane journey for revenge, he always found you the only one still standing by his side. You're loyal and he likes that.
Compatibility? 75%
HUGHIE
You treat him like a child.
No seriously you baby talk him sometimes and it annoys him
"Awwwww is little hughie angry?"
"Stop..."
"Does baby want his milky?"
Since he's pretty much the only person who isn't that exposed to crime as the others, he's terrified 100% everytime when he's paired up to do any dirty work with you.
"Now listen buddy, you better start talking or I'm gonna shoot" You said, gun raised at the man who seemed to be begging you to spare his life in a language you didn't speak.
"I don't think he speaks English"
"Ah shit... ENGLISH!! SPEAK!! ABCDEFG??!"
"How is shouting in English gonna make him understand?"
"Eh, you're right"
BANG
"WHY'D YOU SHOOT HIM??!"
"Well did you expect me to pull out Duolingo and start taking classes?!"
You had to admit, it was a pain in the ass each time he starts giving you the cold shoulder whenever he gets mad at you for doing something terrible. It was like his way of guilt tripping you so you always try to apologise in your own ways.
"Hey..." You said, handing him ice cream.
"...I uh... I donât like Strawberry ice cream... I thought I told you that"
"God you're so ungrateful!!"
Since he was such a scaredy cat, you try to tone down your craziness a bit. For the sake of him not going into cardiac arrest.
"(Y/N) STOP!! She has nothing to do with this!! She was tricked" Hughie grabbed you by the arm to pull your gun away from the innocent woman.
You turn your head to look at him, then at the woman, then at him again, then the woman, then him again.
"Ugh finnnne... you're boring..."
However, he does appreciate you trying to be a better person. Even you had to admit, after you met him and became friends. You noticed yourself being less brutal than you used to be. The thought keeps you awake at night and it scares the shit out of you.
But oh well, how could you ever say no to those scared little puppy eyes?
Compatibility? 55%
FRENCHIE
He's like your hype man which is concerning.
Not because you're not afraid to get the job done but also because you always have his back.
"Well... I need some gunpowder but I've run out of them" Frenchie said, telling Butcher that the plan was most likely not gonna happen.
"Hold on" You said with the typical comical âđť gesture before heading into a different room. Everyone exchanging confused glances at what you could possibly be doing.
After a few minutes you'd return with a bag of gunpowder while struggling to zip up your pants with the other hand.
"Don't tell me how I got it. It almost tore me apart" You said, rubbing your ass.
On stressful nights, you guys would enjoy smoking weed together by the sofa and share stories of your traumatic childhood. It's how you guys bond and it's oddly wholesome.
Also when he needs a shoulder to cry on, you were always there for him. You two shared a type of relationship that even Romeo and Juliet couldn't compete with. To be fair they're dead so they actually can't fight.
"Hey reader!! If you're gonna keep reading then you might as well give the post a like or a repost. C'mon, pleassssseeee pleasepleaseplease"
"Ma cerise, who are you talking to?"
Although he doesn't mind your behaviour sometimes but he won't tolerate it if you ever cross the line on something. He's like the owner who sprays water at his pet cat when they don't listen.
"What are you mad at me for?!?!"
"You damn near tried to get us killed!!"
"Hey! You're the one who said it would be a suicide mission so I made sure it was a suicide mission!!"
"WHAT?"
There's no way he can deny how curious he is about where you get your guns and things. He once went in your room to find boxes of dynamite and a RPG just placed against the wall like furniture.
Like do you have a supplier or are you your own supplier?
Compatibility? 99.9%
M.M
Everybody deserves second chances.
He always tells him that to calm himself down everytime you managed to fuck up a thoroughly planned mission.
"What did I say about pressing buttons (Y/N)?"
"Honestly I stopped paying attention after you said 'Listen here'."
M.M has to be the only person you fear to the fact you try very hard to avoid him, this is because his long ass lectures are such a pain to deal with.
"How many times do I have to remind you? You can't just go around doing shit like that. You gotta consider the amount of danger you'll put everyone in..."
"(Blah blah blah... he's still going... uggggh... make it stop...!)"
Unable to handle the lecture any longer, you ended up shooting yourself in the head.
"(Y/N)!" His tone more disappointed than concern since this wasn't the first time you did this to escape his talks.
You know that russian dollhouse he tries to build in season 2? Well you'd constantly be found standing or sitting near him when he's trying to finish the set.
Since you're aware of his OCD, you like to edge him on by sometimes rearranging the parts or stealing some of it so he ends up searching high and low for the missing parts.
You had to admit it was entertaining to watch him accuse other people for touching his stuff when it was you behind all the schemes.
I'd like to think that after every mission when you happen to die, he'd be the one in charge of collecting your remains so you'd grow back.
That's why it comes naturally that his job is to make sure you don't do anything extreme.
"Where are my bombs??!?!" You'd shout, storming around the place looking for them.
"I sold them. Thought it'd do us more good knowing you wonât accidentally blow us up"
"WHAT?! GOD! It's like the writers of the show couldn't afford another explosion for this season so they had to use this DUMB of an excuse!!"
Though he does see some good in you through the messed up parts, he once saw you give his daughter a cute teddy bear when they've been burned by Vought.
She still has the bear and M.M likes to think that maybe you have a soft spot for kids since you never had a proper childhood. That's why he chooses to understand you rather than just being ignorant about your behaviour.
Compatibility? 80%
KIMIKO
She finds you a little odd but she doesn't mind once she realises how everyone is used to you being like that.
Whenever you're bored, you'd come to see what she was up to. Just imagine you sitting on the sofa like a curious kid as you watch her write alphabets on the book.
She also tries to communicate with you since she thought maybe your fucked up mind would understand her better in a way. Like how in season 2 she was repeatedly writing 'boy' to Frenchie but he didn't understand, so she came to you.
"Woow... watching you try to talk to me is like watching a baby take it's first breath..."
"đ"
"It's beautiful..."
Turns out her theory was wrong, you had a harder time understanding her compared to the rest.
Since you're the only two people in the group with powers, most of the time you two are sent on dangerous missions together. It's a nightmare for her because everybody knows communication is key but one is mute and the other doesn't listen.
"(Be quiet! There's people in the other room!)" She'd sign to you but you were busy humming a song while throwing around the enemies equipment.
"Oooh, what's this?" You held up a Homelander figurine which made you laugh as you show it to her.
"Hey look! 'I'm Homelander, I'm God's favourite. I play golf with Jesus every Sunday."
"(Can you please take this seriously?)"
"You're right, you gotta stop messing around Kimiko! We have a target to kill here" You said and you threw the figurine away which apparently clashes into a stack of boxes that came crashing down. The sound making everyone inside the building grab their weapons and began cornering you two in the room.
"đĄ"
"Okay that wasn't me that was gravity"
For the boys, you were plan A and she was plan B. That's because you always end up rushing into a fight first which most of the time resulted in you getting dismembered, which she later comes in to save you.
For example when Stormfront had stopped you guys, your bright ass thought it was a good idea to charge at her even though everyone was signalling you to stop. Next thing you know you were just a head being carried by M.M, you ended up watching as Kimiko fought Stormfront with the help of Starlight and Queen Maeve.
"That's my girl!! Now can anyone lend me a hand? I think I lost mine"
Compatibility? 97%
Bonus +
SOLDIER BOY
You know the scene where he walks out of his containment with the gas surrounding him? You swore when you watched him step out butt naked, you could hear angels singing and trumpets playing inside your head.
Shockingly enough, he was the only person who appreciated your humour. Could be a generation thing. He's just relieved not everyone has gone soft over the years.
In a way, you feel like you've become his babysitter. Everytime Butcher and Hughie left to do some business, you were in charge of making sure he doesn't blow up anyone. You kept him entertained so he didn't mind. That's why on the hunt for his former team members, he immediately chose you to be by his side.
"I'll take red with me"
"Red as in the american flag or the russians?" You asked which had him do the typical boomer laugh.
"I like you, you're funny" He said with a strong pat on your shoulder.
Butcher doesn't mind you with him cause he trusts that you can keep him under control. Hughie on the other hand isn't sure if you can even keep yourself under control.
"Shhh... wait... do you hear that?"
"Ah shit, did I accidentally said my dirty thoughts out loud? It's just you look breedable in that suit"
Another thing he likes about you is that you're okay with killing pretty much anyone, just try not to overstep cause that could potentially piss him off.
"I told you he's mine" He said as he had you pinned against one of the trees, apparently you had shot Mindstorm in the head when he literally made it clear to you minutes ago that was his kill.
"Quite possessive aren't you? I can recommended a therapist I know. Her names Marthaâ"
"You shut your mouth before I shove my shield up your ass"
"Gasp don't you DARE threaten me with a good time!!"
At the end of Season 3, you would obviously side with Butcher when everyone started to turn against Soldier Boy. He had to admit he was kinda hurt though, he expected you to be on his side.
"So what? You're crawling back to him now? After what we've been through?"
"Sorry big daddy, but Butcher has been my day one and I also happen to love him veryvery much"
Cue Butcher rolling his eyes out of disgust.
Compatibility? 100% but after the betrayal? 0% đ
#MOM CUT THE WIFI#THIS TOOK TOO LONG TO FINISH#x reader#the boys#the boys x you#the boys x reader#the boys x y/n#the boys billy butcher#the boys butcher#the boys hughie#the boys mothers milk#the boys mm#the boys frenchie#the boys kimiko#the boys soldier boy#butcher x reader#hughie x reader#frenchie x reader#mm x reader#mothers milk x reader#kimiko x reader#soldier boy x reader#billy butcher#hughie campbell#frenchie#mothers milk#kimiko the boys#kimiko#soldier boy#the boys amazon
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shift shenanigans - s1 social media au
note: jus for fun ! may or may not do more parts.
warnings: crude humor, slightly offensive jokes from richie sry
part two
liked by syd_adamu, marcus.brooks11 and 30 others
chefboyardee: my friends! i love my friends! the two on the right more than the left (iâm joking i promise) đđđđ
see all 8 comments
syd_adamu: brave of you to call him your friend y/n
âł chefboyardee: boss man carmy save me
âł syd_adamu: oh.. :///
marcus.brooks11: you did me so dirty, friend.
âł chefboyardee: love you marcus you look spectacular
âł marcus.brooks11: donât start
richietheking: Where am I?
âł chefboyardee: ya motha
liked by syd_adamu, chefboyardee and 10 others
richietheking: Getting sh$!t done.
see all 8 comments
marcus.brooks11: This is coolllddd.
âł richietheking: You already know it man.
syd_adamu: this is actually crazy
carmyberzatto: can you show this on instagram? i think you should delete this.
âł richietheking: Delete your life.
chefboyardee: come down to the beef for a number 6 the occy way đŻ the safest joint on the block đ¤đŻwe are đ���
âł richietheking: Eyyy I know thatâs right.
âł carmyberzatto: please donât advertise this.
WE HAVE THE BEEF đĽŠ
[ 8:25 am ]
y/n:
bruh im about to lose it. heads up when you guys get to work.
marcus: that catering order is about to be crazy
DO NOT REPLY: These white boards are stressing me out.
syd: we know, probably giving you ptsd from not finishing high school
DO NOT REPLY: Fuck you I did finish it.
y/n: oh i gotta change ur contact name richie
richie poo: ????? What
y/n: it was âDO NOT REPLYâ lols
marcus: valid
syd: real
richie poo: What? Why?! Thatâs so rude
y/n: cuz you piss me off
and you kept blowing up my phone yesterday
richie poo: You werenât answering, and we needed help at the cook out.
syd: the one where you poisoned everyone?
richie poo: Fuck off.
y/n: when iâm off work, iâm off work.
marcus: donât let carmy hear that, y/n
y/n: donât remind me
syd: heâs trying at least, go easy on him. he really has great ideas
richie poo: You mean you have great ideas in that little notebook
tina: Never trust a broad with a notebook.
syd: hey! iâm just being helpful
y/n: do you guys think my ig post will hurt carmys feelings
marcus: it would make me a little sad if i were him, but i donât think he cares
y/n: great iâm gonna cry now
syd: i doubt he even saw it y/n itâs fine
richie poo: Check the work chat. Cousin is in a mood.
y/n: oh great
tina: Help us all.
syd: be nice you guys
WORK
[ 9:15 am ]
carmy: Everyone, we have huge catering orders tomorrow to prep for today. Please get here as soon as you can, the earlier you clock in the better. Additionally, please be careful what you post on social media. I donât want people to get the wrong impression
y/n: yes chef đ¨âđł
syd: ok sounds good
richie poo: Cool it, Cousin. Whatâs the issue with the social media
tina: I use FaceBook. That not allowed now??
carmy: Tina, youâre fine. Iâm talking about those who post work things on public accounts
marcus: facebook is crazy
richie poo: I canât go private
y/n: he needs the likes
richie poo: No Iâm disabled from doing so. Not sure why
y/n: liar
richie poo: đI donât like you
carmy: Then please donât post pics of yourself posting up with a gun and an air horn outside of my shop anymore.
marcus: that pic was fire canât lie
carmy: Well, itâs bad for business.
richie poo: Fine, whatever
y/n: carmy
carmy: What, Y/n?
y/n: is this because of my caption on my post iâm sorry i promise i wasnât being for real
carmy: I donât care Y/n.
y/n: is that code for âi care a lot and iâm crying in the office right now and thatâs why the door is closedâ
oh
syd: ? why the oh
y/n: he opened the door and yelled no 𤨠but i think i saw red eyes
carmy: Please get back to work and Iâll comp a meal for you later
y/n: OMG yes chef đ
richie poo: Inappropriate emojis and you shouldnât have to incentivize her to work
y/n: shut up acting like HR iâm gonna beat your ass
jealousy is ugly which is why you have that mug on your face
carmy: Stop
y/n: yes chef đ¨âđł
i heard your giggle tho
richie poo: Again with the schizo episode
syd: you canât say that richie
richie poo: Oh sorry
#carmen berzatto x reader#carmy berzatto x reader#carmy berzatto#carmen berzatto#the bear#the bear imagine#carmy berzatto imagine#x reader#carmen berzatto imagine#sydney adamu#sydney adamu x reader#richie jerimovich#richie jerimovich x reader#the bear reader insert#the bear text au#carmy berzatto text au#crack#fluff#social media au#text au
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Dead on Main au where Jason is of course Dannyâs Fright Knight and like all knights do he has a weaponâexcept itâs his gun.
The batfam + justice league + everyone (except ghosts duh) donât know that his normal average everyday gun is actually like a super powerful spiritual soul shooter that is, yaknow, capable of blasting someone into an alternate dimension where their greatest fears become real.
So imagine thereâs like a big battle where a ghastly ghoul reigns terror on Gotham. The world sends their best heroâsâwizards and occultists are notably high highest in demandâto stop the ghost but, nothing works. All of the weapons and spells and chants fail.
But,
As the fights worsens and the heros scream for people to flee suddenly--
Loud squeaking footsteps echo across the ground. Jason yawns strolling into the battle zone in a ghostbusters t-shirt plaid pants bunny slippers--he strolls up in pajamas--as if annoyed at being woken up and cocks his fucking normal 'i could buy you at walmart' gun at the ghost.
His brothers screech at him yelling âAre you insaneâ and to "get the hell out of here" in fear and panic because their idiot brother is trying to kill a real life ghost with a damn gun.
But then Jason shoots the ghost and it works.
The ghost fizzles down with a cry into just a little blob.
The young man then spends 30 minutes lecturing the spirit saying things like âyouâre glad Iâm not calling the big guyâ and âyou know our highness would not be happy learning what youâve been doingâ before taking out a thermos of all things and sucking the ghost into it.
Jason then sighs and walks away as if he hadnât just defeated a hell raising ghost with a gun people can buy off a corner pawn store and a soup container.
Immediately the bat family swarms him with questions
Dick grabs him by his shoulders tense with worry, âAre you okay?â
âUm yeahââ Jason tries to reply squirming in his hold
Damian cuts him off, âHow the hell did your gun a physical weapon hurt that ghastly demonic spirit!â
âUh that ghost is actually pretty chill you guys just pissed him off." Jason replies plain
They stare at him with a look saying 'you did not call a ghost that has been decimating gotham chill' probably because he did just that.
Tim is the first to break out of the disbelief stupor as he very inteligently says, "What?"
Jason responds easily with a confused quirk in his brow, "Second, my gun affects entities of all sorts, perks to my job and all that."
"How did being a vigilante and also probably crime boss give you a gun that could do that?" Dick asks
Jason sends him a look saying "are you an idiot" as he replies, "Yea, sure, kicking petty thieves and druggies got me my all powerful spirit weapon--No you dumbass, it's from being the bodyguard of the King of the Infinite Realms! How the hell did you guys not think of that!â
Tim breathes in, then breathes out, then breathes in again and screams, "Why the HELL WOULD WE THINK OF THAT JAY?!"
"The--" Batman, suddenly beside them, chokes, "Bodyguard of T-the what."
Jason blinks at his family then his eyes widen, "Oh shit."
"What?!" His family screech in panic
"Oh fuck," Jason says with a growing hysteric smile, "Danny's gonna have a big ol' fucking laugh with this."
"Brother who is Danny!" Damian demands for an answer
Jason coughs into his palm, "Oh yeah you guys really dont dont know. So I may have forgotten to explain some... things."
Bruce levels him with a stare that says "you think?"
Jason chuckles nervously, "So y'know how I'm half dead?"
pause
Damian very eloquently responds for the suddenly dying screaming combusting members of his family, "...sure."
"Well I met the King of the afterlife which is like the Ruler of Everything and he was really cute--" Jason says distant in his own world
"Theres a afterlife?" Superman asks casually appearing beside the emotionally wrecked family
"Yea its pretty cool. So I start flirting a bit with the guy and we hit it off, I now im his zombie ghost knight boyfriend lover for all time. Oh and i got this sickass gun." Jason says with a happy grin
"That is a pretty sick gun." John Constantine nods
"I know right?" Jason chirps
"You wouldn't mind if I inspected--" John reaches his hand
Jason slaps it away, "Not a chance you soul whore. Y'know your basically the tax evasionist of the Ghost Zone right?"
John only sighs and leaves
"But yea so I'm like the ghost world equivalent to married with the king and became his knight and thats how I was able to stop that ghost guy." Jason reiterates as if explaining a simple question, "Y'guys get that?"
Tim is on the ground trying to decide whether; sobbing hysterically, interogating jason to find out all the things he doesn't want to know or sleeping would be a better use of his time.
Dick has decided to blame himself and has started to draft a reddit post in the middle of the street starting with "I (23 m) have a younger brother (19 m), who I used to resent but really regret now, he died and came back and doesn't even tell me about what goes on in his life anymore. How do I fix our--"
Damian is just staring at the gun and... Jason pushes it deeper in his holster and shifts to the side, better to be safe than sorry with this thieving shit.
As Jason adjusts his weaponry he hears Bruce sob in the background, "He didn't even invite me to the wedding! Am I that horrible of a father!"
Wonder Woman pats his shoulder reasuringly whilst the rest of the League seem to be trying to calm him down
Jason looks around tiredly at the mess he had created and decides fuck it
"Alright I'm heading out for the night, you guys get home safe!" He yells and without caring to listen to anyone and everyone voicing their confusion he zips open a green portal and stumbles in
He crashes down on an unbelievably comfortable bed
Danny blinks blearily before sending the young man a sleepy smile, "Hey Jay, what kept you up so long?"
Jason slipping under the blankets with a yawn says, "You would not believe the night I just had."
------------------
Edit: UMM HII The fic is out now here!! you guys are awesome I'll post the new chapter 2 in a hot sec after editting ^^
#dp x dc#dc x dp#dp x dc crossover#jason todd#jason peter todd#danny phantom#danny fenton#dead on main#i love me a good âHUH????â fic#damian is the true spokesperson for what were all thinking and im tired of acting like hes rude#should i continue?#maybe write a fic?#idk#oh who am i kidding ill probs post this to ao3#this was jus gonna b an idea draft but it got out of hand#oh wells#batman#batfam#jason x danny#yaaaay#fanfiction#sorry abt grammar im sleepy :(#i wrote most of this on my phone which maid me wanna slam it into my celiing but whateves#danny is soooo cutie pie adorbs#but also raaaah im sppoky yknow?#ohkay im tired gn party ppl#there r so many tags...#veerliwrites
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(CW for SA, suicidal ideation) Here we go. My favorite and simultaneously least favorite panel of Vash and Knives.
I've seen a few interpretations of this scene and before we dive into the one that really struck me, let's start with the more... chill one. We're finally introduced to the third gun of Trigun, Vash's angel arm. And the way we're introduced to it involves Knives forcing him to pull the trigger. Of course, since no one knows anything about Knives, the people of Noman's Land blame Vash for Fifth Moon, and Vash likewise blames himself (this is kinda a spoiler but if you've been paying attention, it's just par for the course). However, he's not the one who pulled the trigger, Knives is. It brings up an interesting moral question of blame - do we blame the gun (and Vash, who is being used/objectified as a weapon here), or the person who wanted it to happen? Guns don't kill people, genocidal twins do!
Now for the awful interpretation, the one that makes me cry and wish Vash was real so I could hug him and pay for his therapy. And really highlights how awful Knives is and how far he'd go for his brother in his own, fucked-up way. I touched on this in a previous post about Legato and the Murder Cafe, and the whole time I was thinking about Fifth Moon but didn't want to say anything for the sake of spoilers.
So. Pay attention to the way Vash and Knives are standing. Knives, when he first grabbed Vash's head, was standing in front of him. He moves behind him to better control him and yeah, he's still controlling him via hand on head, and now he's got his other hand gripping Vash's chest, where feathers/wings are manifesting. Knives is assaulting him. If you wanna get crazy with it and say that the angel arm is kinda phallic, you could say... yeah. This is rape. I heard that specific interpretation once and while I accepted it I also don't know if that would be generally accepted or if I'd be called out for it, so I'm trying to tread lightly here.
It also doesn't escape me that of course the angel arm has feminine features like the plants - the plants that, again, humans are exploiting for their ability to create. There's a lot of feminist commentary to be made here but many people have said it better than me. Specifically I'm thinking of this one post I saw about gender fuckery and Tristamp Vash. Anyway.
Also, the atomic bomb/black hole/sun/whatever that is in the middle... It's just so powerful. It's terrifying. The eldritch body horror here is a punch to the gut. What the fuck, Trigun? I thought this was a funky space western!!!
Oh, and here's more commentary on the following few panels:
Vashussy shot, Knives is still right behind him. Yeah, I wasn't kidding about how bad this pose is for them. Knives, you sick fuck.
Vash shoots himself in the leg (a key difference from '98 trigun, lol), because of course he does, but it doesn't free him from the arm.
The arm's getting darker/the light inside is getting lighter! Stampede did an awesome job with their interpretation of the angel arm and I don't think I would have understood it without that. Also, on my first read I didn't notice that Vash is literally levitating, which is cool, but also terrifying because ?? he's not in control of that either??
Finally. A super painful, minimalist, double-page spread. Nightow loves 'em. Vash thinks he's dying (maybe?) and he wishes he had never existed. It's not suicidal ideation per se, but he wishes he didn't exist at all because he's already caused enough suffering. This is a low for him, because he believes so strongly in the concept of the Blank Ticket. (Come on, soupy brain bitch boy, get it together!) He's a monster, it's just how he was born, and he's not in control. Very specifically too, he says "we", and then changes it to "I"... he doesn't blame Knives at all, and that's very him. I want to shake him! Stop playing the martyr, Vash!
#trimax#trigunbookclub#cw assault#cw sa#ive never tagged content warnings before please help if i didnt do it well enough#cw sui ideation#vash the stampede#millions knives#also this is ENTIRELY SEPARATE from kv/plantcest shipping. do not discuss that here. this is not about shipping.#posting this makes me so nervous ngl#dont hate me
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I've had a bit of brainrot today and have to share so I can get it out of my head (maybe) so feel free to ignore lol I've been thinking of 141 having a civilian spouse (separately, just in case there was confusion) that only ever refers to them by their call sign/rank during an emergency situation. Using it just immediately sets off sirens and they see red. - đ
Yesss. Got a bit carried away with this one, lol. Only did 141 specifically, lmk if you'd like to see anyone else! Also tried my best to make this GN!đ
141 With Reader Who Uses Their Callsign in Emergency Situation
Warnings: mentions of guns, violence, unwanted advances/touching, stalking, swearing, injury, crying--- I promise it has a good endingđ
Simon Ghost Riley-
"Golly, aren't you a fine looking thing." You heard a voice say behind you, as you were standing at the bar getting you and Simon another drink. Simon had just gone to the bathroom, so you knew you were on your own for this.
You turned around and were met with a man double your size, a sickening smile making its way on his face.
"Oh, thank you." You mustered a small smile before turning back to the bar, praying the man would take the hint and leave you alone.
"No, I mean it. I could take that little ass of yours home right now." The man came closer, and you could just start to feel his breath on your neck, making you cringe.
"I have a boyfriend, I'm sorry." You tried softly. You were desperate at this point, your eyes searching for Simon.
"I don't see him anywhere." The man smiled, his teeth were yellow, and his breath reeked of cheap booze.
"He just went to the restroom." You mumbled.
You felt a hand grope your ass slightly, squeezing at the flesh there. "Mmhmm, if I were your boyfriend, I'd never leave you unattended like this."
You cried out, moving to swat the guys hand away, to no avail. Nobody around you seemed to notice your predicament, and you were starting to grow scared.
The man pushed you up against the counter, his hand now gripping your waist. "Be a good little pet and come with me, okay?"
You struggled against his hold and screamed out, "Ghost!"
Simon, who had just exited the restroom, heard the wail and immediately started to run to you. What he saw had him seeing red.
He forced himself between you and the man and grabbed his hand roughly. "Who the fuck do you think you are touching them."
The man looked as if he was about to piss himself, as Simon was nearly a half foot taller and twice as bulky. "Sorry, man, they acted like they wanted it."
Simon seethed and twisted the man's wrist with such force that you swore you heard bones cracking. "Get. The. Fuck. Out. Of. Here. Before I decide to do something that'll end with me in jail."
The man let out a small whimper, grabbed his now bruised hand and ran for the door.
Simon watched as he fled, then turned his attention to you, his eyes softening. "Y/N? Sweetheart, are you okay?"
Your eyes filled with tears as you threw yourself into Simon's chest. "Thank you, Si."
"You don't have to thank me. That's what I'm here for, yeah? Why won't we go home, I'll draw you a bath." He pulled away and cupped your cheeks, carefully pressing a soft kiss to your temple.
You nodded your head slowly and let Simon lead you out of the bar, not expecting him to crouch down on the ground once you made it outside. "Si?"
"Cmon, get on my back. Long way to the car." He gestured to his back and helped you on it, holding your legs tightly as he walked you to his car. He'd be damned if he ever let anything like that happen again to his person.
Kyle Gaz Garrick-
You were walking around your local department store one afternoon with Kyle, looking to find him some new dress shirts. The two of you had a friends wedding to attend that weekend, and Kyle didn't have many outfits to pick from.
"What about this one?" You picked out a light blue stripped dress shirt, holding it up for Kyle to see.
"I'll look like a grandpa with that one, babe." He joked, waiving away the shirt.
"You'd be a hot grandpa." You countered, putting the shirt back.
"Oh hush. I gotta run to the restroom, I'll be right back." He chuckled as he gave your arm a squeeze. You watched him walk away with a small smile before returning to the racks in front of you.
Unbeknownst to you, there was a gentleman who'd been following you and Kyle around the store for some time now, and now that Kyle was gone, it was the perfect opportunity to strike.
You were just rounding the next row of racks when the man came up behind you and started to pull on your purse. You cried out, trying to pull back, but the man was too strong. He yanked with one mighty tug, ripping the purse from your arm, and shoved you backward, sending you toppling into the racks behind you.
"GAZ!" You screamed, as the man stared at you, frozen, before turning the other way and running.
Kyle was walking toward you when he heard you scream, and his blood ran cold. He immediately sprinted in your direction, running right into the man with your purse. The man fell backward, and Kyle looked down to see him clutching your purse.
He put his foot on the man's stomach and pushed down hard. "Give me the fucking purse, asshole."
The man refused and tightened his grip on your bag. Kyle saw red and promptly punched the man square in the jaw, knocking him out cold. He grabbed your purse as a few workers finally came to check on the commotion.
Kyle looked to see you clutching your head in pain. He ran over to you, sliding to a crouch position once he got to you. "Baby! Are you okay?"
Your bottom lip trembled as a strangled cry escaped your throat, and Kyle grabbed you, pulling you to his chest. He had to talk himself down from going and giving the man another few punches.
He tucked his arm underneath your legs and lifted you up bridal style. "I'm so sorry, babe. I've got you. Let's go home. Yeah?"
Kyle spent the rest of the night watching over you and icing the bruise that formed on your head. He made a silent vow that day, that he'd beat the ever loving shit out of anyone who dared touch his baby again.
John Price-
BANG!
You looked up from your computer in your home office at the sound of the loud noise. It was late at night, and John was asleep, so you were concerned as to what caused the sound. You grabbed the pocket knife out of your drawer and made your way quietly to investigate.
Peeking your head around the doorway, you saw a large man making his way through your shared home with your husband. It appeared he'd somehow broken in through the front door.
You let out a small whimper, the confidence you had before now fading. John was fast asleep upstairs, and you had no way to get to him without revealing yourself.
You watched silently as the man started to rummage in your drawers, trying to find anything valuable he could take.
He started to draw closer to where you were, and as you slowly crept backward, the floorboards creaked underneath you.
The man was immediately notified of your presence and caught a glimpse of you as you tried to hide around the corner.
"Hey! You!" He shouted, immediately running toward you.
You sprinted in the other direction, narrowly missing his outstretched hand. You ran into the bathroom in the hallway and tried to close the door before a hand came out to stop it.
"Nowhere to run now." He said, a terrifying smile lining his face.
"PRICE!" You screeched, your heart beating rapidly.
John's eyes flew open at the sound of your terrified cry. With adrenaline coarsing through his veins, he flung himself out of bed and grabbed his handgun from his bedside table. He slowly crept down the stairs and took in his surroundings.
He saw you right away, crouched in terror before a man, who had you at gunpoint. John swiftly made his way behind the man before hitting him hard on the back of his head with the butt of his gun.
The man fell limply to the floor, and you let out a strangled sob. "John."
"Hey love, it's alright. I'm here." He approached you slowly, his hands raised up to show you he meant no harm. You held your arms out to him, and he pulled you into him, holding you tight. "I've got you. Nobody's going to hurt you."
He pulled away for just a moment to call the cops but held a grip firm on your waist, letting you know he wasn't ever going to let anything happen to you.
Johnny Soap MacTavish-
"Alright, babe, I'll run and grab the stuff at the bottom half of the list. You grab top?" Johnny asked, eyeing your fairly large grocery list.
"Sounds good, thanks, love." You smiled at him and tore the list in half, sending him on his way after a quick peck.
You watched as he strolled away, basket in hand, and made for the toiletry section of the store.
You were comparing toothpastes when you felt two men staring at you. You subtly turned your head in their direction, and they quickly looked anywhere but your direction.
You felt a slight sinking feeling in your belly and quickly threw one of the toothpastes in your cart. You made for the next aisle, looking around deoderant for you and Johnny, when the same two men appeared again, walking slowly down the aisle toward you.
Trying to brush off the occurrence as a coincidence, you threw what you needed in the cart and started to make your way to the shampoo aisle. Your resolve quickly crumbled when you now realized the men were following you.
The store was rather empty, so there was nobody close by for you to turn to. You sped your cart up and headed in the direction you thought Johnny might be. The men were hot on your tail, making it clear they were trying to get to you.
You felt one of their hands touch your back, and you let out a cry. "SOAP!"
Johnny was just finishing up his portion of the list when he heard your scream. His heart was beating rapidly as he dropped the basket and ran to you.
"Y/N?" He called out and was met with a horrifying sight. You were cornered in one of the aisles by two men and were crying, your hands up in a defensive motion as you crouched on the floor.
Johnny immediately approached. "Leave my partner the fuck alone."
The two men whipped their heads in his direction, rubbing their hands together. It was clear they were looking for a fight. Johnny lifted his shirt slightly, revealing his sidearm strapped to his waist. "Try it, I fucking dare you. You won't like the outcome."
The men clearly knew better than to create such a scene in a store and decided to flee.
Johnny watched as they ran and crouched down to your level. "Baby. Are you okay?"
You choked out a sob and wrapped your arms around your husband. "I was so scared, Johnny."
Johnny gritted his teeth in anger, he hated that anyone made you feel this way. It took everything in him not to go chasing after those bastards.
"I know, baby. I'm here now, though. Why don't we quickly finish up this trip and grab some takeout, yeah? I'm not really feeling up to cooking anymore." He pulled your face away gently and stroked your tears away. "I've got you, always, okay?"
You nod slowly and let him help you up. He grabbed your hand, lacing his fingers with yours, not letting go until you both reached the car.
#simon ghost riley x reader#soap imagine#soap x reader#simon ghost riley#cod imagine#simon riley imagine#mw2 imagine#ghost x reader#simon riley x reader#ghost mw2#john price#captain price#price x reader#price imagine#gaz imagine#kyle gaz garrick#gaz x reader#ghost imagine#ghost cod
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OBLIGATORY COMPLETE OFMD SEASON 2 TEASER THOUGHTS AND SPECULATION POSTâ˘
Okay, to start off, I cannot BELIEVE we got this. I cannot BELIEVE we got a voiceover of Stede's note to Ed. We were all thinking it. We were all hoping for it. I CANNOT BELIEVE WE LEGITIMATELY GOT TO SEE AND HEAR HIS LOVE RIGHT OFF THE BAT. HE LOVES HIS ED SO SO MUCH.
Followed by this shot right as Stede is narrating. It's difficult to tell, but it seems like Ed??? The one-armed jacket and the fact that it's layered with Stede's narration makes me quite certain it's him. But ALONE??? AND COMING OUT OF THE SURF??? (There's a shot later that has me PARTICULARLY raising eyebrows at this moment. I'm thinking that he fell off the boat/was lost in that one storm shown later, and Stede of course is going to dive in after him or attempt to get to him in some sort of dramatic way. Which makes me think he and Stede are going to potentially talk feelings/reconcile on the beach)
And the fight choreography of this. Are you actually kidding me right now. ARE YOU KIDDING ME. GETTING TO SEE ED ABSOLUTELY KICKING ASS IN COMBAT??? NEVER IN A THOUSAND YEARS DID I EXPECT TO SEE A SHOT LIKE THIS BUT I'M HOLLERING SO HARD OVER IT (NOT TO MENTION, AGAIN, LOOKING AT THIS AND A LATER SHOT..........I'LL SCREAM ABOUT MY THOUGHTS WHEN SAID SHOT APPEARS HSKDLS)
Oh, they're PINING pining. They're YEARNING yearning. They're GAY gay.
They want to be back with each other so so so bad I'm losing my mind <3
"Fuck you, Stede Bonnet." The way he's JUST as dramatic as we were all thinking. The way he's hurting in a way WE ALL ANTICIPATED. LIKE, YOU HATE TO SEE IT, BUT MAN DSJKLDSSDKL. Also, the contrast of him saying that vs Stede's voice over is so so insane. The editors are INSANE FOR THAT ONE.
AGAIN, GOING BONKERS OVER ED'S CHARACTERIZATION BECAUSE HE SEEMS EXACTLY HOW I ANTICIPATED. Outwardly, angry, hardened, and cold. Inwardly, heartbroken, desperate, and wanting nothing more than to be back with Stede. Because hello, HELLO, HE'S NOTCHED WHAT I ASSUME TO BE HIS NUMBER OF DAYS WITHOUT STEDE IN THE WALL??????
HI OLU HELLO OLU MY DEAR DARLING OLU
but also screaming and crying and throwing up because this is ALSO what i was anticipating/hoping for. the crew being like "ummmmm lmao captain?? you really think you've got this under control???"
"You think Blackbeard's going to murder you?" I THINK NOT BECAUSE WHAT IS HE EVEN SHOOTING AT JSLDKS. OFF TO THE SIDE??? A WARNING SHOT????? Also the lighting of this and his look matches the ending shot so I'm very eyes emoji at this entire thing.
HOWEVER...
"MURDERER THRICE OVER?????????????"
Like sorry, that sign won't stop me because I can't read. Look at him. LOOK at him. You're telling me he stole the wedding cake toppers so he could PAINT HIMSELF ON THE BRIDE??? SO HE COULD MAKE HIMSELF INTO THE BEAUTIFUL BRIDE HE WANTS TO BE????? SO THAT HE COULD PLAY PRETEND MARRIAGE BETWEEN HIMSELF AND STEDE???????
INSANE!!!
INSANE FOR THIS!!!!!!
Again, bonkers editing. The split screen. The CONTRAST between Stede's hopefulness and Ed's depression. The WAY THEY LINED IT UP TO MAKE ED LOOK LIKE HE'S TAKING AIM AT STEDE. THE WAY THIS PROBABLY PERFECTLY ENCAPSULATES THEIR CHARACTERIZATION IN THE FIRST FEW EPISODES HSDJKLSDS LIKE BITING THE EDITORS BITING THEM BITING THEM
ALSO ED AND ALL OF HIS GUNS,,, NINE GUNS???????
It kills me because he's probably being exactly what he thinks people see him as. He's probably like "Oh, you want a monster? I'll give you a monster."
WHICH,,,, NO, HONEY. YOU'RE A SWEETHEART, SORRY ABOUT IT.
AND THEN LOOK AT THEM. LOOK AT OUR DARLINGS!!! FANG'S FUCKING SPIKES ARE SO METAL. FRENCHIE'S WOLVERINE COSPLAY SHDJKLSHDLKS. JIM!!! JIM JIM MY BELOVED JIM, AND THEIR PAINTED BEARD. THEIR GENDER!!!!!!!
Honey hsdksjds the drama of it all. THE DRAMA. CRASHING WEDDINGS TO DISRUPT LOVE BECAUSE YOUR OWN WAS DISRUPTED??? SIIIIIIRRRR THE THEATRICS, THE SPICE OF IT ALL
excuse me ma'am that is a gay man shdkjshkls THAT IS A GAY MAN. WHAT ARE YOU EVEN DOING,,,
kiss me instead like wtf
OKAY NOW THIS,,,
THIS.
PRESIDENTIAL ALERT: THE BABYGIRL IS FIGHHHTTTTIIIING
BUT IZZY WATCHING ON??? IZZY????????????
I have Genuine Thoughts⢠about this. I have a feeling that the big arc/character development Con mentioned might pertain to him like, REALIZING what's important, and what Ed actually wants and needs. And a good chunk of that will be him realizing the consequences of his actions, and maybe potentially wanting to undo the damage. And also, in his Bitchy Izzy Waysâ˘, he might also get very very tired of Ed's sulking/theatrics and want to rectify things for that reason too.
So I feel like he's going to sort of team up with Stede and show him the ropes for that reason?? So they ALL can work towards betterment???
WHICH IS NUTS LMAO. NEVER EVER EXPECTED THAT.
REGARDLESS, GO STEDE BABY GO!!!
HI REVENGE HELLO REVENGE PLEASE DON'T DO ANYTHING DRASTIC LIKE EXPLODE OR ANYTHING PLEASE BABYGIRL <3
yeah yeah the titties we've all seen them.
BUT AGAIN, AGAIN, STEDE OFF TO THE SIDE. STEDE WATCHING. STEDE LEARNING THE ROPES FROM THE MOST UNEXPECTED PERSON EVER SHDJKSDS LIKE WHAT!!!
AND HEEEEEEERE WE GO. HERE'S THE SHOT I WAS REFERRING TO EARLIER.
THE SAME BLACK SAND BEACH. FIGHTING THE BRITISH. ED AND STEDE. ED WITHOUT HIS MAKEUP ON. STEDE IN A DIFFERENT OUTFIT.
ARE THEY BOTH,,, FIGHTING TO GET TO EACH OTHER??? FIGHTING THROUGH CROWDS AND ENEMIES TO GET TO EACH OTHER'S SIDES???????
WHAT IF THEY FIGHT TO EACH OTHER AND THEN KISS HUH???
WHAT THEN.
HIIIIIIYYYAAAA JACKIE <33333
ALSO HELLO IS THAT THE SWEDE BEHIND HER???????
EXPLOSIONS FIRE EXPLOSIONS EXPLOSIONS FEELING VERY WEE JOHN CODED RIGHT NOW!!!!!!
AND THIS IS YET ANOTHER SHOT I WAS REFERRING TO EARLIER,,,
LIKE UHHHHHHHHHHHHH
WITH ED ON THE BEACH, AND THIS SHOT OF SOMEONE FALLING INTO THE WATER,,,,,,
I HAVE A FEELING THAT ED IS GOING TO DO SOMETHING THAT ENDS WITH HIM FALLING OFF THE BOAT. MAYBE HE TRIES TO SAVE SOMEONE???
if he fights to save stede from going overboard or something equivalent i'm going to eat all the tiles off my floor <3
LIKE IT'S BAD BESTIES. IT'S BAD. IT'S DIRE. THE WATER IS SO FUCKING HIGH AND THEY'RE IN A STORM AND JIM IS SCREAMING AND I AM ALSO SCREAMING!!!
But then also, LOOK AT FUCKING WEE JOHN!!! IN DRAG!!! HE'S A FUCKING MERMAID!!! JIM ISN'T A MERMAID???? WELL, THAT'S FINE--WEE JOHN IS!!! LIVING HIS BEST FUCKING LIFE!!!!! AND WHAT IF HE MADE THAT COSTUME HIMSELF SJDKSDJLS <3
AND THE FINAL SHOT I'M CHOOSING, THE FINAL ONE OF THE SET,,, MATCHES UP WITH THAT LIGHTING EARLIER.
WHO ARE WE FIGHTING, ED BABE. WHAT'S THE TEA. WHO ARE YOU CLOBBERING.
IS IT US?
IT'S PROBABLY US.
BECAUSE THIS ENTIRE THING HAS ME SO SO SO DEAD Y'ALL
#OFMD#Our Flag Means Death#OFMD Season 2#OFMD S2#OFMD S2 Teaser#OFMD Season 2 Spoilers#Gentlebeard#Blackbonnet#Edward Teach#Stede Bonnet#Oluwande Boodhari#Jim Jimenez#Frenchie#Fang#Izzy Hands#Spanish Jackie#Revenge Rambles#OKAY NOW I'M ALL OUT OF JUICE HSDLJKSS#ALL OUT OF BRAIN POWER#BUT MAN#MAN!!!#SO SO SO OSO SO SODOSJDKLSDKLS EXCITED
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all im saying is â¨Logan with a knot⨠and Wade overstimulating you bc you cant get away -đŚ
shrimp anon more like shrimp COLORS bro your vision is INSANE!!!!!!
soooo idk conventional a/b/o rules and i kinda don't care so im picturing a heat cycle as once a month endeavour. and bc you're on T you're a HORNY motherfucker and you're angry and violent so it's basically whoever can get their hands on you or knot in you first will take care of you. then as long as you get bred at least once you're fine. then you calm down and it's big aftercare hours bc your post-heat clarity endorphins are going CRAZY
now since your heat only comes once a month, wade treats it as a special occasion. and it wouldn't be fair of him to do the honors EVERY month, now would it?
so even though he's home with you, and logan's not, and won't be for a while, wade wilson will refuse to fuck you. it's not his turn. he did it last month.
and your heat is MISERABLE. imagine the worst period cramp you ever had, combined with hot flashes, searing rage, and it gives your cunt the sensitivity of a fucking bear trap. you'll clamp down on anything that touches you.
so no matter how much you suffer. no matter if you scream, cry, beg, grovel, bite, or commit acts of gratuitous violence against him.
he will hold out.
he will hold out until logan gets home and finds you naked, cuffed to the bed by your hands and ankles, a chewy ball-gag in your mouth getting crushed by your gritting teeth, and wade's holding a wand vibrator to your cunt.
he waves gayly at logan, "hey pinkie pie, merry christmas! wanna come open your gift?"
"jesus christ, are you fucking torturing him?! the hell is wrong with you?!"
"with ME?! where's your holiday spirit?"
logan just stares at him blankly, puzzled by what this psychotic dipshit could possibly be talking about. in response, and in the spirit of the season, wade sings him a song.
"đźit's the mooost wonderful tiiiiime, of the mooonth~!đľ"
now he gets it.
"oh... okay. so then why did you tie him down like that?"
"well, we had a little INCIDENT earlier..."
--
you had managed to grab one of wade's guns and shot him in the chest
"OW!!! you RESOURCEFUL little shit!!! GRRR, oh~ mysweetboybabydarling i'msoproudofyou, butnoi'mnot, BAD BOY!!!"
--
"no, i mean why didn't you take care of him your-fucking-self, wilson? you really gotta make this my problem as soon as i walk in the fuckin' door?"
"your PROBLEM?! i hand you some prime-time, limited-edition, hot and bothered, ripe for the breeding, tranny boy BUSSY on a silver platter, and that's somehow NOT where your dick wants to spend its evening? am i hearing that right? please tell me i'm not. please tell me you're not this stupid, pookie bear."
instead of arguing back, logan goes quiet. he's thinking. and then, he laughs. that low, husky laugh that you have when you're marveling at the nerve of whatever dumb motherfucker is talking to you. or maybe, when that dumb motherfucker is making a point.
"heh... y'know what? fine." logan angrily strips his clothes off, one by one. his tanktop, "you want me to be the one to knot him? huh?" his belt, his jeans "can't do anything yourself, can ya?" and lastly, his boxers. then he grabs his cock and shakes it at wade.
"so then get me hard, you faggot." he clicks his tongue twice. "c'mon."
wade throws himself at logan's knees and gives him that gawkgawk4000turbotyphoon treatment to get him up. logan sighs in relaxation, grateful that wade was putting his mouth to such better use. once his eyes flutter open, he nods at you, finally giving you even a modicum of attention while you're under intense distress, and he merely waves at you nonchalantly, like how a pedestrian does to a car that lets him cross.
"hang tight, bub. be with ya in a second."
wade works him over until his knot is just barely starting to swell. he then takes his fattened cock and slaps wade across the face with it.
"take his chains off."
"hm... are you sure you want me to do that, princess? he's feisty, y'know. might get yourself bit, if you're not careful."
logan slaps wade again, but this time it's a bitchslap, using the back of his hand. and his claws.
"take. his fucking. chains off."
"mmm, right AWAY, your majesty~!"
#anon#ask#đŚ#deadpool x reader#deadpool smut#deadpool#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool x ftm reader#deadpool x reader x wolverine#deadpool x you#deadpool x trans reader#wolverine#wolverine x reader#wolverine smut#wolverine x trans reader#wolverine x you#wolverine x ftm reader#poly deadclaws#poly poolverine
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đ§đ˘đŞđľđŠđ§đśđ || joel miller x reader
đ´đśđŽđŽđ˘đłđş || joel wasn't looking for a follower, or a protĂŠgĂŠ, or an employeeâ whatever you're supposed to beâ when he saved some dumbass kid from a couple runners. but he ended up with you anyways, and you swore to always be faithful to him... in every way.
đ¸đ°đłđĽ đ¤đ°đśđŻđľ || 9.2k
đ¸đ˘đłđŻđŞđŻďż˝ďż˝đ´ || smut (18+ only; oral f receiving, unprotected sex, very slight dacryphilia kinda?, a touch of degradation and dumbification in there, and virginity loss with some pain and one mention of blood), heavy age gap (not specified but the reader is absolutely an adult), insecure crybaby reader, unrequited love/pining, reader wants to fuck joel so bad it makes her look stupid (and we love that for her cause same), angst, tess getting kinda screwed over but only because it's absolutely necessary for the plot, emotionally repressed joel, mention of reader's parents being deceased (implied to be infected)
this fic does not contain spoilers for anything but minor details from episode one!
They were doing that thing againâ where they talked in front of you, as if you werenât there.
âSo we make the run tonight,â Tess decided, standing while Joel sat on the worn-out sofa with his hands clasped and his elbows resting on his knees. âWe should be back by four, thatâs when the FEDRA boys have their shift change, so we can avoid too much risk of getting caught.â
âWhat should I do?â you piped up. They both looked at you with that oh yeah, sheâs here glare and Tess sighed; she didnât try very hard to hide her frustration with you, but at the same time, she was actually nice to you when she was in a good mood (which was rare). Joel was less mean but also less niceâ he stayed steady in his neutral-to-mildly-irritated state, and you figured if he wanted you to fuck off, he wouldâve said so (probably in those exact words, too).
At the same time, they both instructed you flatly: âKeep watch.â
You sighed, shoulders sinking. âAgain? Canât I at leastâ?â
âYouâre safer here,â Joel insisted.
âYeah, and your gun is safer in the box under the bed, but itâs not gonna do shit to protect you if you never take it out,â you countered.
Tess scoffed. âAnd what are you gonna do to protect us?â
âI wasnât,â you admitted. âYou know Iâm a great shot, but I wasnât gonna try to shoot anybody. Iâm quieter than both of you. I can get in and out betterâ and nobodyâs looking for me. Everybody knows youâre smugglingââ
âNot everybody,â Joel defended himself in a mumble.
â â so if I do get caught, I can probably get out of a search,â you bargained.
âAnd what are you gonna do to get out of a search?â Tess smirked. âBat your eyelashes?â
That did sting, but you rolled your eyes and hoped you had effectively looked like it didnât affect you at all. âIf implying that Iâm pretty enough to get out of a search is supposed to be an insult, I canât wait to hear one of your compliments, Tess,â you repliedâ but your voice was soft and almost shaky, not as confident as the comeback merited. That summarized you pretty well: you had the will to be tough, but when it was time to really go for it, your body failed you and your hands got shaky and your eyes watered. Almost anything could make you cry, Tess had already made fun of you for it; Joel just seemed to get really uncomfortable when you started crying, but you always did your best to hide it from him. It just didnât usually work.
Your whole face probably lit up when you caught Joelâs suppressed smileâ did he think your joke was funny? He hadnât been smiling when Tess made fun of you, so it had to be what you saidâ or maybe he was thinking of something he would say if he cared enough to say it, some comment about how you could do more than that to get out of being searched. He didnât seem the type to make comments like that, but he was well aware what guards might let (or make) a girl do to avoid punishment.
âWhatever,â Tess decided, shaking her head, âyouâre not coming with us, thatâs the point.â
âJoel gets a say, too!â you blurted out. âYou canât just pick for him that Iâm not coming, he has toââ
âYouâll stay here,â he interrupted. So much for getting Joel to let you goâ you thought maybe he would side with you, for once. Deflating, you nodded, and they stopped paying attention to you at the same time that you stopped paying attention to them.
Your mind wandered in times like this, when they were talking and it was clear that it didnât concern you; Tess said once that you had an âoveractive imaginationâ, but she hadnât said it in a really mean way (like she said most things). You didnât want Joel to think that you were always daydreaming, but you couldnât help it sometimesâ you really just hoped that he didnât know he was the subject of so many of your thoughts.
Truth was, heâd caught your eye long before he even knew you existed. Youâd seen him around, doing all those odd jobs he did to make ends meet, and thought he was⌠well, handsome, but not just that. Mysterious. Intimidating, though he didnât exactly intimidate youâ okay, he did, but not like he did everybody else. He intimidated others because they were afraid he would hurt them; he intimidated you because you kind of wanted him to hurt you. Not, you know, bad, just⌠maybe a hand around the neck or pinning you to a wall or something?
It wasnât in spite of your inexperience that you had thoughts like thatâ it was because of it; you had been lonely for a long, long time, and maybe it was just fantasy, but you always wanted someone like Joel. You wanted someone to take care of you, protect you. You were just guessing that he was capable of that, but he proved it when you met for the first time.
It wasnât exactly a meet-cute, or even just a pleasant way to meet; you were short on rations, because youâd given most of yours away to Mrs. Davis who was too old and weak now to earn any extra for herself, and someone offered to pay you ten if you snuck something they could sell out of the old mall in the QZ⌠well, that went about as poorly as anyone wouldâve expected.
You asked Joel what he was doing there, after heâd saved you from the runners, but he refused to tell you. Either way, it was the best luck you ever had that he showed up and fought them off. For a moment, heâd held you close to him as he pulled you away from the Infected; you wished, later, that you hadnât been too terrified to appreciate that.
Ever since, youâd sworn yourself to himâ in more ways than one, but he only knew about the main one: you wanted to assist him however you could, figuring after he saved your life that you should dedicate it to his service. Well, Joel had never been interested in your assistance, or anything else about you. It was actually Tess' idea to let you stay: "if she wants to help, let her do it for free," she whispered to Joel, and he shrugged, and he did. That was how it ended up like this: you were the squeaky, wobbly third wheel of Joel and Tessâ operation, more often than not doing the least important work if not filling your time with essentially goose-chase tasks they invented to keep you occupied. Keep watch and listen to the radio were your biggest assignments; just wait here was another common one, when they were too lazy to call it one of the other two.
Tess left a little while later, and Joel laid down on the sofa. You broke away from your thoughts and tried to make yourself usefulâ you got up to rinse the dishes, humming a random tune to yourself as you worked. You were already back inside your head, wondering if you should tell Joel it was a song youâd heard on his radio and had stuck in your head ever since. Probably not worth it; it usually didnât go well when you tried to talk about things like that. Joel and Tess talked about before a lotâ well, it wasn't that often, because it wasn't very productive to talk about it. But they talked about it occasionally and you never had anything to say. Once, you tried to weigh in: they were reminiscing on concerts before the outbreak, bands and artists they remembered, and you chirped about how "I read about that in a book once!"
They both glared at you, and you didn't say anything else. But you didnât take it too personally, they just didnât want to feel oldâ but you didnât think either of them were old! These days, old wasnât a matter of years, it was really just about usefulnessâ like poor Mrs. Davis, she was old, she couldnât do much for herself anymoreâ and they were both⌠actually, they were both significantly more useful than you. That made you sad. But at least Joel had helped you get better with gunsâ not that he ever let you carry one.Â
âI didnât ask you to do that,â Joel broke the silence as you washed his favorite mug.
âI know,â you said back, voice light and chipper. âYou donât have to.â
You felt his eyes linger on you for a moment after that, but he didnât say anything else.
~
Though they had decided already that you werenât joining them on the run, you ended up thereâ mostly by happenstanceâ when Joel and Tess met with the buyer who wanted half of what they managed to bring back. Not many people in the QZ could afford that kind of contraband, so it made sense that it was one of the FEDRA soldierâs bankrolling this. They were by no means rich, but they had a lot of pull and could provide all sorts of ration cards and promises to look the other way if future issues arose. He couldnât guarantee safe movement out and back in through the boundaries of the city, but he at least promised to look the other way in any future run-ins with the law.
âSo thatâs it: youâll leave at eleven, youâre back by four, and you bring me my share the next day during my break?â the soldier confirmed.
âYep,â Tess agreed. âQuick and painless. Hopefully.â
You didnât expect the manâs eyes to land on you, but you didnât particularly care for it. "Is your little lap dog coming, too?" he smirked, glancing at Joel after he was finished raking his stare over you.
Your face got hot instantly, with shame and confusion. "Iâ I'm not in his lap," you denied, "that's notâ we don'tâ"
âNo,â Joel interrupted firmly, âsheâs not coming.â
There was an awkward silence, the place where he mightâve said and sheâs not my lap dog, if he cared much about the accusation. Tess seemed to be hanging onto that silence nearly as tightly as you were.
âWhatever,â the soldier finally brought everyoneâs attention back to the conversation, âjust meet me here tomorrow at half past one, and weâll see what youâve got.â
You were still thinking about that conversation that nightâ while you were keeping watch, like Joel had asked you to. It was really boring; you spent most of the time on the couch, reading a book youâd bought off someone for a few rations. After a while, your curiosity got the better of you, and you started snooping around Joelâs apartment. There wasnât much to look at⌠he didnât own much, just a few shirtsâ actually, you thought those jeans he always wore might be his only pairâŚ
Your search led you to his bed. Even with no one here to see you do it, you were a little embarrassed to lean in and take a whiff of his pillowâ but it was totally worth it. It smelled just like him, that warm piney kind of scent he had; in times like this, not many people could afford to smell nice, but Joel could. Not to say that he was the type to splurge on all the nicest stuff, you were pretty sure he didnât even own cologne, but he owned shampoo and deodorant, so that put him in the 80th percentile for hygiene in the Boston QZ.
But it wasnât just those products you smelled on his sheetsâ there was something quintessentially Joel to it all, something impossible to define but incredibly addictive. It was instinctual, the way you got in his bed and curled up in those sheets, burying yourself in the comfort of him. It was so easy to imagine how he might hold you, now that you were hereâ all you were missing was his strength, his weight, slow and steady breaths behind you as he drifted to sleepâŚ
You woke up when you heard the door shut. Startled into sitting up, you were hoping youâd have time to get out of his bed before he saw youâ but he was already standing there, staring at you. He was just a shape in the dark, so you couldnât see his face, but you heard the exasperated sigh.
âI thought I told you to sleep on the couch,â he said.
âR-right, sorry,â you coughed, recalling last time this happened with a pained wince.
âBetter yet, I thought I told you to keep watch!â
âYou know you just say that,â you mumbled, âso you can keep me away from the real work.â
He didnât say anything, probably because he knew you were rightâ but even if heâd wanted to, he couldnât, because Tess walked in a second later. âCanât believe he tried to stiff us,â she was saying as she walked in, half-laughing in frustration. âWell, yeah I can,â she added a second later.
Her attitude changed when she saw you in the bed. âIâ Iâll go back to myââ you started, but you ended up just getting up and leaving in a hurry before you could really finish your thought.
Wiping a small tear from under your eye quickly, you walked out of Joelâs apartment and started for your own bunk across the cityâ even though it was more likely than not that somebody would hassle you for walking around during curfew.
Yes, if you had a little more self-respect, you would just stop hanging around those two and find some other work to do, but Joel had done something for you that you could never repay and never forget. He didnât have to love you the way you loved himâ and youâd been sure for a while that he never wouldâ but couldnât he at least be a little nicer? You wouldnât feel right being anywhere but at his side, no matter how much he made it seem like he never wanted you there at all.
~
Honestly, you did consider not going back the next morningâ but you figured they might actually need you for the next part. Okay, not need, but they could at least use you for something: after smuggling anything in, you need a fence, someone to pawn this stuff off. Joel and Tess did a decent job of keeping a low profile, but it was even easier to do so when they had someone like you moving contraband around Bostonâs population.
So, after a few hours of sleep on that radically uncomfortable cot, you decided to head back to Joelâs place. The sun was just above the horizon by this time, but only the people working early shifts for their rations were up now; you liked the city best when it was quiet like this, but then again, you liked almost everything better quiet.
Usually, Joelâs apartment was the same way. But when you walked in, the energy was completely different than you were used to. Where youâd normally find Tess counting up the score while Joel sipped on coffee (or liquor, depending most on the hour), instead you walked in on what was clearly a loverâs quarrel.
The thing was, this was not your typical argumentâ they were doing it Joel and Tess style, which is to say, as repressed as possible. In fact, they werenât even talking when you walked in, but just the way they were standing was indicative of the discomfort they were clearly trying not to acknowledge.
Tess was at the window, arms crossed, looking at the view; and you knew that was a bad sign, because there was no view to be had, the QZ was an eyesore and she complained about it all the time. Joel was sitting at the table, facing the other way, his hand squeezing his own fist instead of the handle of his mugâ it didnât look injured, but his face still had a hint of pain on it.
âIâm sorryââ you mumbled, not sure what you were apologizing for yet, but Tess interrupted you.
âIâll go,â she decided, walking over to the table.
âOkay,â Joel agreed, not looking at her.
Well, you were no relationship expert, and you didnât even know what they were arguing about⌠but you knew that was pretty cold. âSo thatâs all youâre gonna say to me?â Tess prompted him, her tone tight and her eyes red.
You kept your head low, as if that would hide the fact that you could clearly see and hear all this. Â
âYeah,â Joel decided, not as aloof as usual; it reminded you of how he usually spoke to you, that frustration, but it was definitely different. More⌠exhausted. âYeah, it is.â
Tess put her weight predominantly on one leg, her hips shifting, as she let out a scoffing sort of breath. For a moment, she looked at you; you looked back at her shyly from beneath your brows before looking away. Why would she look at me right now?
Shaking her head, she left, mumbling to herself but you couldnât make it out. The door slammed behind her. Joel sighed next.
âEverything okay?â you asked sheepishly, twisting your boot on the floor to watch the shapes it made in the thin layer of dust.
âClearly,â he insisted, and the sarcasm was obvious though his voice was neutral. You could tell he didnât want you to prod moreâ anyone who knew Joel for two minutes would know thatâ but you still chewed your lip as you wondered what you should do.
Your attention turned to the stacks of contraband on the table; most of it was perfectly legal material to own, just not legal to acquire from outside the cityâs perimeter. âLooks like a good haul this time,â you noticed, hoping a change of subject would soothe him a little. Maybe it did, but he didnât show it. He just kept squeezing his fist, and you gently sat down across from him at the tableâ and you started doing what you figured you should, going through what theyâd brought back and starting to figure how much you could get for it.
For a while, he entertained that conversation, though with as short of responses as possible. Not even a âyesâ or a ânoâ, just hums and grunts that got the point across. You could tell he was thinking, but you could also tell he didnât want to beâ that heâd rather forget about all that. For once, he was struggling to do that.
It scared you to imagine doing something he so obviously didnât want you to do, but you knew you couldnât ignore it forever. âWhat made her so upset?â you asked softly, finally.
He paused for so long that you thought he was just ignoring your question, but he did eventually say something. âShe told me something I wasnât ready to hear,â he answered, âand⌠and I guess I said the wrong thing.â
âWhat did you say?â
âActually, I didnât say anything,â he admitted with a thin laugh. âBut, I said nothing in the wrong way.â
"... Do you think she'll come back?" you pressed, and his sigh was answer enough.
You had to wonder if he'd make you a real partner in all this now. Probably not, right? He thought so little of you before, that wouldn't change just because Tess was out.
âIâm sorry,â you decided.
âItâs not your fault,â he promised. âIt was me.â
You didnât press on that, already thankful and pleasantly surprised by how much heâd shared. He stood up a moment later, leaving the table and moving to the kitchenette so he could make some coffee; oddly, that comforted you. Like things were going to go forward now, like life could be normal again and he would still drink his coffee.
For a while, it was quietâ just how you liked it, and how you figured he liked it, too. He was humming a song at one point but you didnât think he realized he was doing it.
It was so quiet, in fact, that when you went to lay on the sofa later, you ended up accidentally dozing off. You couldnât say how long you were asleepâ you were pretty underslept, but it didnât feel like more than an hourâ just that you were awoken to the sound of movement in the kitchen area.
Sitting up, you tilted your head when you saw Joel had begun packing up the contraband haulâ well, half of it. âWhat are youâ?â you began to ask, but then you saw the time, and you remembered; but he answered you anyways.
âOur buyerâs on his break now,â Joel announced as he stuffed a pack of bandages into his bag. âI said I would meet him to show him what we got.â
âI can go with you!â you announced. âYou know, if Tess isnâtââ
âItâs fine,â he insisted, âI can do it myself.â
âJoel, please,â you pressed, âI promise Iâll do whatever you need me to, I just wanna helpââ
âI need you to stay here,â he frowned.
Some things never change, huh? âWhy donât you just let me go? Let me help you?â you whimpered, lip shaking as you started to cry. You hated yourself for it, but you knew you couldnât stop it.
There was a pause before he responded. âI donât like the way he looks at you,â Joel explained, but you doubted that was the real reason he didnât want you to come. âIt only takes one of us, youâre better off here.â
âTess was gonna go!â you reminded him, getting more upset. "I know I'm notâŚ" you trailed off as you tried not to cry too much or too loudly. "I can't do what she canâ I'm not strongâŚ"
He sighed as he knelt down in front of you, resting his hand on your knee. You peeked out from behind your fingers, but looked down again.
"I'm notâ I'm not smart, either," you whimpered. "I don't know anything, about before, about nowâ"
"That's not true," he mumbled, but you weren't finished yet.
"Nobody knows why you even keep me around, I sure don't," you shrugged, dropping your hands defeatedly, hot tears running faster down your face and dripping onto your pants; his hand reached up and wiped your cheeks with a gentleness you never knew he had. âMânot⌠Iâm not tough, like you guysâŚâ
"You know what you are, little girl?" he replied quietly. "You're good. You're sweet. Me an' Tess, we need someone like you to keep us from bein' sad old assholes all the timeâŚ"
He sighed, and you thought was done talking, until he spoke again, softer.
"I need someone like you."
Your heart swelled, and light filled your chest, until you had just enough confidence to finally blurt out what you'd been holding in for months: "Joel, you should know that I alwaysâ"
"Shh," he soothed, nodding. "I know."
Your face got hot instantly again, and your heart sank. "I think everybody knows," you mumbled awkwardly, giving him a half-smile through the drying tears. "But I thoughtâ it's just that you neverâ"
âI couldnât,â he insisted. âYou understand that? I couldnât, not with youââ
âWhy not?â you snapped. âWhy canât you?â
âIf you donât know why, youâre more hopeless than I thought,â he frowned.
âI knowâ I know Iâm⌠a lot younger than youâŚâ you mumbled, almost not wanting to say it in case he actually hadnât noticed that. âI know you think Iâm not very mature and stuff⌠but that shouldnât matter when you really love someoneââ
âWoah, hey,â he coughed, âlove? Sweetheart, youâve got a crushââ
âNo! Donât tell me how I feel,â you snapped, surprising both of you with your sudden ability to stand up to him. âYou can tell me what to do but not what to feel.â
âOkay,â he softened up, âfine. Thatâs fair. But itâll passââ
"I've never loved anybody before," you whimpered, "and I'm never gonna love anybody like I love you. I know that! I know you think I'm just a stupid kid who doesn't understand love, but I know that I really love you! Okay? So just⌠just stop talking! Doesnât need to take this long for you to reject me, geezâŚâ
There was a pregnant pause, you were too caught up in your own frustration to really notice it: the way he looked to the side, chewing on the inside of his cheek for a moment. You werenât expecting him to say anything after that, so it nearly startled you when he spoke. âIt was last night, after you left,â he explained. âIâ I thought about telling you to come back, figured youâd be safer on the couch than walking back across the city at that timeâŚâ
Wrapping your arms around your chest, you smiled a little imagining that, but you knew you couldnât have taken him up on that offer: it wouldâve killed you, trying to sleep on that sofa while Joel and Tess shared the bed.
âShe told me not to,â Joel continued. âThatâs⌠thatâs how it started, I guessâŚâ
âThat girlâs so obsessed with you,â Tess laughed lightly, toying with Joelâs lapel. âItâs cute, really. I mean, itâs sadâ but itâs cute.â
âHm,â Joel said first, not really listeningâ it took him a second to properly react. âWhy is it sad?â he asked when her words processed completely.
ââCause she thinks she might actually have a chance,â Tess explained.
That was it, what he did wrong; he sees it now, in retrospect, but at the time he figured saying nothing was his safest bet. Apparently, he didnât have to say anything.
âShit,â Tess said suddenly, moving instantly from shock to anger. âAre you fucking serious?â
âWhat?â Joel spat.
âYou know fucking what,â she returned sharply. âThat lookâ you looked away.â
âOkay? So?â Joel tried to defend himself, but he knew that she knew nowâ believe it or not, he really wasnât much of a liar. Especially with her.
âSheâs a goddamn fetus, Joel,â Tess reminded him. âShe hasnât seen a hundredth of the shit weâve seen, she hasnât lost anyoneââ
âLost her parents,â Joel corrected.
âWell, we all lose our parents,â Tess rolled her eyes, âthatâs part of life.â
Not the way she lost them, Joel wanted to add, but he was going back to his original plan of saying nothing.
âSheâs not like us,â Tess insisted.
âMaybe thatâs a good thing,â Joel decided.
That was the point of no return; because Tess had never thought of you as competition, she barely even thought of you at all, but if innocence was something he wanted⌠then the competition was already over before it even started. The silence was heavy, more sad than angry, and Joel knew he really fucked up because heâd never really seen Tess speechless before. Is it bad that he didnât regret it, though? Maybe he couldâve handled things better, but telling her the truth couldnât be wrong. Itâs not like heâd been hiding it, reallyâ he never even acknowledged it himself, not often.
âI canât believe you,â she shook her head, and shame twisted in his gut. âPart of me alwaysâ not always, I guess, but part of me wondered. Sometimes the way you looked at herâŚâ
As she trailed off, Joel looked down, too afraid for her to look in his eyes now.
âYouâd do anything to keep her safe,â she said instead of finishing that last thought. âI told myself you didnât look at me like that because you knew I could protect myself.â
âI do,â he promised.
âSo what do you want?â she asked point-blank. âSomething you can protect, or something you donât have to?â
âAnd what did you say?â you asked hurriedly.
âI told her what I wanted,â was all he replied, and your heart skipped. âAnd thatâs⌠thatâs why she left.â
Joel nodded slightly, looking away. But you reached out and touched his face, turning it back towards you. Impulsively, you leaned forward and kissed him; it took all the courage you had, and a hand on his shoulder for balance, but you felt him kiss you back after a moment. It was gentle, for how sudden it was, and you sighed as his hand moved higher up your leg. Â
You were still crying, because of course you were, but he didnât mind as much as youâd worried: he only wiped your tears away, holding onto your face, standing up and pulling you with him.
âI love you,â you whispered as he embraced you, wanting to say it a thousand times now that it wasnât the worst-kept secret in Boston. âI love you, Joelââ
âI know,â he promised, whispering back into the kiss which got deeper with each passing moment. âI know, darlinâ.â
That was enough for youâ that was plenty: the way he kissed you, and held you, calling you darlinâ in that rough-yet-gentle voice⌠you were weak already, melting into his touch, ready to give him anything.
In fact, he had to put a hand on your shoulder and gently push you away to get you to calm down, and your face heated up as you realized how eager youâd been. âDonât need to get so worked up, mâgonna take care of you now, okay?â
âYou always take care of me,â you noticed.
âA different way,â he explained.
Just the way those brown eyes darkened, just the way he said that made your thighs clench against each other. âY-youâll miss the meeting with the buyer,â you realized.
âFuck,â Joel grumbled, and you smiled a bit. âWaited this long and now Iâve gotta fuckinâ leave you again.â
Your hand rested on his chest, the soft flannel of his shirt transmitting some of the warmth of his body, and you looked up with him with wide, wet eyes.
âI know you hate waitinâ here, but⌠I always liked it,â he admitted, his voice softer yet deeper. âI always liked knowing you were here, waiting for meâŚâ
Your heart swelled. âY-yeahâ I didnât mind waiting for you so much,â you admitted in return, âjust didnât want you to think thatâs all I was good for.â
He kissed your temple, making your chest flood with warmth. âI know,â he promised. âYouâll be here when I get back, wonâtcha? Canât disappear on me now.â
âI wonât, Iâll be here,â you assured, turning your face to peck his cheek in return. It seemed to surprise him, like he hadnât had tenderness of that sort in a long time.
~
Funny how youâd waited for him all night before, but that half hour felt longer than all of them combined. You were quite sure you knew what he meant beforeâ about how he would take care of you in a different wayâ and it put you on edge all afternoon.
You couldnât stop thinking about the way heâd kissed you, about his hands pulling you closer. Or his eyes: if heâd ever looked at you like that before, you hadnât noticed (which was probably what he intended). Â
For how much time you spent wondering what you would do, what you would say, when he returned, you ended up not doing much of either: he was on you the moment he stepped in the door, though that was sort of what youâd been betting on when you decided to strip down to just your underwear and wait for him like that. Not that you minded the idea of him, you know, tearing your clothes off like one of those romance novelsâ you just didnât like the idea of having to wait any longer than you already had and this shirt had way too many buttons.
He did take a moment to stare you down when he came back, to appreciate your nakedness, and despite imagining showing yourself to him many times before, you felt a little self-conscious with his eyes just piercing through you like that: you didnât cover yourself, ignoring a slight instinct to do so, but you did wrap your arms over your stomach and cross your legs as you sat on his bed.
Waiting for him to say somethingâ or, possibly, waiting for yourself to find some courage to speakâ you were a little taken aback when he grabbed you and kissed you. And you realized, as his lips moved with yours even harder, deeper, needier than before, that there was nothing else to say.
He climbed on top of you on that bed, laid you down on it gently, as his weight pressed you down into the mattress. You could've sworn you heard him growl when he rocked his hips against yours, a firm bulge in his jeans pressing right up to where heat had gathered between your legs.
Fingers weaving in his hair, you hummed as you did all you could to keep him close, as if he might just disappear if you didnât hold him near to you. But he didnât seem like much of a flight risk, considering his tight grip on youâ so tight it could leave marks, which you hoped it would. You needed more than just memories of this.
âTell me this is what you want,â he demanded, his voice breathless yet somehow not weak at all. âNeed to know you want this.â
âFuck, Joel, fâcourse,â you promisedâ wasnât it obvious? It probably was. But you could understand if he was still fighting back some guilt; you just wanted to do everything you could to help him forget about that. âSo bad,â you continued, âfor so longâŚâ
âSince I saved you?â he assumed, his teeth grazing your lip like a threat to bite down harderâ a threat that made you throb from the inside out.
âBefore,â you admitted, smiling sheepishly. Â
âDidnât even know me before,â he noticed, raising an eyebrow.
âSaw you around sometimesââ god, am I blushing as hard as it feels like I am? â âthought maybe you could⌠you knowâŚâ
Protect me. Hold me. Take care of me. And fuck me like the world is ending even though it already did.
He smirked at you proudly, leaning in to kiss your neck this time, following some invisible trail that made you even more sensitive to the touch of his lips; after he kissed right under your ear, he whispered to you.
âThen just go ahead and take what you want, darlinâ.â
After a shiver ran over you, so strong you thought it might never end, your hands shot down between you so you could get to work on his belt and fly; you felt his smile against your skin, then his teeth a moment later, as his hand rubbed the curve of your waist gently.
Both of you gasped when your fingers wrapped gently around his cock, for different reasons. The skin was so smooth, it was hard to believe something this soft and silky was part of Joelâ and it was hot, or maybe your fingers were just cold, but you hoped that didn't bother him.
He was already starting to move his hips just a bit, rocking into your touch, and you hummed when he suddenly grabbed your hand to force it to press firmer against himself. "You thought about touchin' me like this before?" he asked in a voice that was breathy and lowâ you loved hearing the pleasure in his voice.
"Y-yeah," you admitted shyly; when he let your hand go, your touch wandered, your hands sliding up under the bottom of his shirt so you could feel the skin thereâ the firm muscle, the thin scars, the graying hairs that formed a trail down his stomachâŚ
Grabbing your wrists, he pinned them down above your head, and you let out a joyful whine. "Keep those there," he ordered, and you nodded as you watched him intently.
His hands traced down your body, making shivers run all over your skin; how could a man with so much strength touch you so delicately?
He purred as his fingers ran down to your panties, toying with the edge of the fabric before carefully pulling them down your legs. You tried not to wiggle too much, but your hips were desperate for some friction, for some attention from himâ they didn't have to wait long, though. He groaned at the sight as he parted your legs, grabbing himself to rub his fat head through your folds. "Fuck," he mumbled, your channel clenching on nothing as you saw how far apart his tip forced your swollen lips, "so wet for me already, bet I'll slide right inâŚ"
Your back arched with a moan just imagining that, and he pushed your stomach down flat with his free hand so you wouldn't angle too far away from him, laying his body atop yours. Though you tried to stay still, you couldnât stop shaking as he lined himself up; it felt surreal, it felt hyperrealâ his skin against yours was unlike anything you couldâve imagined.
Youâd sort of wondered if heâd say something before he put it in, maybe a quick you ready? or even here it comes which wouldâve been stupid but an appreciated warning nonetheless. Instead, he just looked at your face carefully, and pushed inside. It was sudden, sharp; your whole body tensed up and you sucked in a breath before biting your lip.
He only made it halfway in, struggling against how tight you were. You were doing everything you could not to give away your pain, but he must've seen it in your expression.
"What's wrong?" he asked in a hoarse whisper. "I'm hurting youâŚ"
"Noâ Joel, please don't stopâ"
You wrapped your legs around his hips to try to keep him inside, but he pulled out most of the way and looked downâ and you winced when he saw the blood. "Baby, you⌠are youâ is this yourâ? Fuck, why didn't you say something?"
"You wouldn't have done it with me if you knew it was my first time," you explained with a whimper.
"No, babyâ I just would've taken my time with you, s'all," he sighed, "would've helped youâ sweetie, it didn't need to hurt like thatâŚ"
Clutching tighter at his shirt, you pulled him down into a needy kiss. "Hurt me more, Joel," you pleaded into it with a breathy whisper, "do whatever you want to me. I'm yoursâ that's all I want, just to be yours."
He kissed you back, slow but passionate; but, much to your dismay, he pulled out and sat up.
"No, Joel, I'm sorry," you whined, "I'm sorryâ I didn't mean to lie, I'm so sorry, I promise I can be good! M'gonna be really good for you!"
But he just shook his head, and you bit your quivering lip as tears ran down your temples. He smiled, just a little. "Such a crybaby," he scolded you softly. "What am I gonna do with you, little girl? You can't even keep yourself together."
He leaned down again, but he slid his knees down on the bed so he could position his face between your legs. He kissed your inner thigh first, and you jumped because it tickled.
Then he held your hips, running his thumbs over your skin soothingly, and you tried not to squirm too much as he looked up at you with those dark eyesâ much darker than before. âYou want me to taste you?â he asked, like it was your idea or something.
âUh, yeah,â you mumbled sheepishly, and he actually laughed for a moment. Â
âYeah?â he repeated. âCould you be a little more specific?â
Ohâ he wants me to beg. âUmâ please? Taste me, JoelâŚâ
He smiled, but not like a haha funny smile or an oh thatâs nice smileâ a really dirty kind of smile, even though his teeth were actually in better condition than most out here. âOkay, baby,â he agreed.
He was subtle about it at first, just giving gentle kisses all around; you felt⌠exposed, even more than you had with his face between your legs before.
âIs that alright?â he asked, his voice rougher than the last time you heard it.
âY-yeah,â you choked, clearing your throat. âDonât⌠donât stop, pleaseâŚâ
When he got back to it, he was much more aggressiveâ long, slow licks between your lips, sloppy kisses with his eyes shut tight; and you whined as you held on tighter to the sheets. You didnât realize how hard you were shaking until his grip on your thighs was bruisingly tight. And as he held you down, he just dug in deeper: every time you thought heâd stop escalating the intensity of it all, he just did it moreâ he just did everything moreâ until you couldnât control your moans and gasps anymore.
His tongue was the fucking devil; he slid it inside you and your eyes rolled back. He sucked greedily on your clit until your hips bucked uncontrollably, moaning against your skin just enough that you could hear it over your own shameless cries.
"Joel, fuck, how are youâ? Oh godâ"
"Mm?" he encouraged you to finish your thought without breaking away from you.
"How does that feel so good?" you sobbed. "Oh my godâ please don't stop, never stop, oh fuck!"
All he was doing was flicking his tongue over your bud, such a small interaction with a tiny little organ, and your whole body was shaking. Reaching down and grabbing his hair, you didn't mean to tug on it so hard but you also didn't expect him to moan deeply when you did. Â
His mouth moved a little higher, focusing on the bud you were sure had never been this swollen or this sensitive. Doing so freed your opening, and one of his thick fingers prodded at it. "Please," you panted, wanting any part of him to be inside you again.
He pushed it in, the roughness of his skin creating the perfect friction on your delicate walls. You were waiting to feel his knuckle against you, but instead he only put it in maybe halfway, not very far at all. It didnât make much sense to you, until he started to rub one place just inside and a gasp instantly inflated your chest.
âOhââ you choked, and he was licking harder on your clit at the same time that he added a second finger; youâd never felt anything like it before. âJoel!â you squealed, hating how girlish it sounded but helpless to the control he had over your body with just two fingers and his tongue.
His rhythm wasnât all that fast but it was relentless, the exact tempo you needed for that pleasure to build and build, toes curling and vision getting all spottyâ you tried to look down at him sometimes, but your head wanted so badly to tilt back and let everything go black.
âIâ oh, fuckâ Iâm gonnaâ fuck, Joel!â you sobbed, grabbing on tighter to his hair; you took one glimpse at it, and when you saw the scattered silver hairs peeking out from between your fingers, it just made you even more overwhelmed.
He hummed and looked up at you, encouraging youâ his fingers pumped faster and faster suddenly, and when it hit, you felt like your whole body was going numb. It started where he was touching you, but then a moment later it was in your head, then it was just running all over and you were too weak to do anything but give into it.
Suddenly it became too much, and the hand that had been holding him down by his hair was suddenly pushing him away; you blinked away the spots in your vision to catch a glimpse of him with that beard soaked in you, but his fingers hadnât stopped yet. âOh⌠ohhh my godâŚâ you whined, breathing harder than you could ever remember breathing before, your head getting all dizzy and cloudy as he smirked up at you and continued fucking you with his hand.
Your hole was pulsing, flexing over and over, waves of slick leaking out until you could feel the puddle spreading under you. Your cheeks burned with humiliation, even though he kept praising you as his fingers milked everything from your swollen spot. "Good girl, good girl," he said over and over, "fuck, good job, soak the sheets, babyâ soak my fingers, keep goingâŚ"
"Joel," you sobbed, desperate for some relief from the overwhelming sensation. He didn't really stop, just slowed down a lot, but he kept twisting his fingers and rubbing that one place until your quivering body collapsed completely onto his mattress. And then he went on for just a little bit longer after that.
Then he stopped. When you thought you might fucking pass out.
He climbed up your body and brought his two soaked fingers to your slack lips. Â
"You want a taste, too, baby?" he purred.
You dutifully opened your mouth and did your best to clean his fingers off, sucking and licking as he hummed a bit; his eyes got a little darker as he felt your tongue run all over his rough fingers.
"What do you think?" he prompted when he pulled his fingers away, and you swallowed as you made a little face.
"I dunno if I like it," you admitted nervously. "Kinda sour."
"Really? I think your pussy's fuckin' delicious."
Your face flushed, but you didn't say anything else because he was reaching down to hold his cock againâ and your heart started racing.
"Ready to do this the right way?" he prompted, and you nodded eagerly. "S'gonna feel so much better, now you're all ready for me. Ready for something this big inside yaâ but it might still sting at first, okay? Just hold onto me tight."
That you did, tighter than you thought you couldâ apparently you were stronger than you realized, especially considering that orgasm nearly took you out a minute ago. But you had to hold on that tight as he began to push that fat head inside you, stretching you so wide before he'd even gotten the ridge of it past your opening. It didn't sting like before, or at least not as much, but it was still completely overwhelming. You forgot to breathe until he was halfway in: you gasped out his name, reminding yourself he was inside you and above you and everywhere, everything.
"See how muchâ fuckâ how much easier it is now?" he grunted, sliding into you slowly until his hips met yours. "See how you're takin' all'a me? God damn, still tight as hell, though."
You were delirious already, he hadn't even moved yet. You didn't think it could get much better than his mouth on you, than coming because of him, but this? This perfect stretch, this addictive friction, knowing he was completely inside you and that he liked how you felt? This was ecstasy, bliss. And he hadn't even fucking moved yet.
"Gonna have a hard time being gentle with you now," he admitted with a growl beside your ear. "You've got one of those perfect little pussies that just needs to be fucked hardâ suckin' me in, just beggin' for it rough and fast."
"Joel," you whined, "fuck me however you want, please⌠I can take it, I swear, I want you so badâŚ"
Still, when he moved, it was slow and patient. Too goddamn slow.
"Fuck," you sobbed, back arching up off the bed as he carefully savored every detail of you. "Fuck, Joel, I can'tâ I can't believe you'reâ I can't believe it's you. I wanted you so much I couldn't fucking breathe."
He smiled at you, and leaned in to kiss your neck; you let out what could only be described as a joyful whimper. âWanted you too,â he finally admitted. âTried not to, youâre so young⌠jusâ couldnât help it after a while.â
"Faster," you whined, "please, fuck, please pleaseâ"
"You are so goddamn spoiled, you know that?" Joel gruntedâ but then he did it, he fucked you even faster than you'd imagined. His thrusts were still deep and long, but they came at you quicker than you could process and you nearly screamed. Â
You were even more sensitive after heâd made you come the first time; it was just overwhelming, the feeling of him, and you felt like your mind had left your bodyâ like your mind had left you entirely.
âYâfeel fuckinâ perfect, darlinâ,â he praised lowly, kissing your neck with all the gentleness and patience his thrusts lacked. âSo good for me.â
Maybe it was pathetic, but being good for him felt fucking amazingâ not just physically, obviously. It felt like having a purpose; youâd never really felt that before.
You lost track of time; honestly, you lost track of everything. Everything that wasnât this had fallen away, and it was just you holding on for dear life as Joel wrecked you all over again with every motion. "Hear that? How wet you are for me?" he groaned, and yes, there was a squishy-wet sound that filled the room with each thrust. You tried to answer him, say something witty about how he made you that wet so many times, but only moans came when you opened your mouth. "I asked you a question," he reminded you. "Can you fuckin' hear it?"
Whimpering, you could only bite your lip and nod.
"Oh," he smiled, "I seeâ you get stupid with cock in you, huh? Get fucked right and that silly brain just turns off?"
You nodded againâ wasnât much else for you to do.
"Just gonna be a dumb whore for me now?" he asked. "Just kidding, I know you already were."
âFuckâ Joelââ you choked.
"No no, it's okayâ it's good,â he soothed you, kissing a tear from your temple that you hadnât even realized was there. âYou don't need to think. I don't need you to think. You can just be my fucktoy, okay? You can just be my slut. Say it."
"I-I'm your slut, JoelâŚ"
He hummed appreciatively; your moan caught in your throat, and you tried to hide your face in his shoulderâ you couldnât believe he was still dressed, for all you knew he still had his boots on, and meanwhile you were stripped of everything. Not just your clothes: you were stripped of all pretense (didnât need it) and dignity (didnât want it). Youâd thought of yourself as his for quite some time now, but now that heâd really made you his, it was more than you couldâve imagined.
When you came with him inside you, it wasnât like how it was beforeâ definitely similar, obviously the same thing at the core of it, but very different. Before it was so⌠sudden, like a firework going off and then glittering into darkness (at least, that was how you understood fireworks to be, youâd only ever had them explained to you). This was more like a deep pressure that just built and built and built, and then at some point youâd crossed that threshold and you were there but it didnât go away, it just stayed at the peak while he kept moving inside you.
He grunted as your walls beared down on him, watching the tears of ecstasy stream down your face. âTryinâ to milk my cock, huh?â he accused with a snarl to his tone. âSâthat what you want?â
You werenât really paying attention, you couldnât while he was fucking you like that. Digging your fingers into his shoulders through the flannel shirt, you just whimpered and nodded.
âSâworkinâ, baby,â he smiled, âlittle pussyâs got me so tightâ is it a little too much, honey? Youâre cryinâ...â
âIâ I always cry,â you sniffled.
âMânot gonna make you take too much more,â he promised, âdoinâ so good honeyâ gonna let you rest soonââ
âNo, d-donât stop,â you begged, and he laughed a little.
âIâm close,â he explained, and even though that shouldâve been obvious, it made you feel better. âNormally takes me a little longer, but⌠never had a pussy like this.â
That was probably just flattery, but you were happy to believe it. Happy enough to just lay back and let that pleasure wash over you, but of course, he expected more of you than that.
"Tell me where I can come," he ordered. Â
"Fuck, Joelâ anywhere you want, anywhere," you pleaded, struggling to keep your train of thought but desperate to appease him as best you could.
"Inside you?" he pressed.
"Yeah, fuck, anywhere," you insisted.
"I bet that's what you wantâ you want it inside. You want this cunt full and dripping."
âFuckâ yeah,â you agreed, âsâwhat I wantâ please, pleaseââ
âShh, donât need to beg,â he assured sweetly, kissing your neck againâ burying his face in the crook of your shoulder, until his panting breaths echoed on your skin. âDonât need to beg, darlinâ, gonna fill you nice and deepââ
âPlease,â you said again, ignoring his assurances.
âJust like you need itââ
âPlease, Joelâ love you so much,â you sobbed, your thighs starting to go a little numb where his jeans were rubbing against them and your clit getting sore from the way he stayed deep inside and grinded himself against you.
âI know,â he promised again, âjusâ say it one more time.â
âI love you, Joel,â you cried, and it was over somewhat suddenly: he stayed still, and you could feel his grip on you tighten, and you heard that sound that was like a groan and a sigh at the same time. Youâd hoped youâd be able to really feel it inside you, the warmth of his come, but everything was so hot that it was all the sameâ what you did feel was full, even more than you had just from his cock in you, and it was enough to make you clutch at his shoulders again despite having almost no energy left in you.
Though he stayed inside for a little while after, he did eventually have to pull out; you were too exhausted to even think about trying to close your legs when he stared down at youâ at his come leaking slowly from your hole.
You knew there would need to be a conversation soon about what this all meantâ what should happen now with the business, with your relationship, even just what should happen tomorrow morning since youâd both given in to instinct rather than take the safer route and have Joel pull outâŚ
But that would have to wait; you still couldnât think straight, you couldnât think about anything but him in fact.
Thankfully, Joel was just fine with the silence. He just held you, let you wander between sleep and wakefulness, and wiped that last stray tear away from your face.
âIâm sorry I keep crying,â you offered quietly, breaking a long silence.
âI donât mind,â he promised.
#joel miller x reader#joel miller smut#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller hbo x reader#pedro pascal x reader#pedro pascal fanfiction#joel miller x you#joel miller x y/n
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Batman and superman are their opposite personalities in civilian form.
.. so this gives us a perfect opportunity for the most disastrously chaotic dynamic (and love square) EVER.
ESPECIALLY if they donât know the others true identities, or even they did and are just being lil shits anyways
Give me:
grumpy skeptical Clark to Bruceâs sunshine playboy persona.
Clark *trying to down as many aspirins as he can, half tempted to throw himself into the sun* : Bruce we needed to surround the enemy, not SEDUCE them!
Bruce *currently on his way to a dinner wearing the most seductive outfit known to man* : Well, you know the saying. We canât gatekeep or manslaughter our way out of it. Girlboss it is.
Clark: Bruce you are going on a date with a STRAIGHT MAN
Bruce: Give me five minutes and then Iâll let you hear him scream my name
*horrified Clark noises*
==================================
Brooding and detective Batman meeting lie-detector and very effective investigator journalist Clark Kent
Batman: Tell me where the bombs are Riddler!
Riddler *currently tied up* : Hehe youâll never find them~
Clark: Mind if I record this session Mr. Riddler?
Batman:
Riddler:
Clark:
Riddler: Who the hell-
Batman: .. Kent. Howâd you even get here?
Clark: Irrelevant questions. *waves recorder* so..?
Riddler: Sure..tell the public Iâm going to paint the walls red-
Clark *in investigative journalist mode* : So which devastating rock bottom led you to lose your mind and pursue this as a career?
Riddler:
Riddler: hey wait hang on this is a fulfilling career!
Clark *raising a judgemental eyebrow*: So.. you fighting a man dressed as a bat, with that atrocious outfit you mustâve gotten from hell and riddles that youâll give him the answer to anyway.. this is fulfilling?
Riddler *voice breaking* : .. yes?
*questioning and judgemental silence*
Few hours later
Red Robin: .. why is Riddler crying and why does he also have a career counselling book in his hand?
Batman *just as surprised and kind of disturbed at how methodical and impressive Clark was in breaking down Riddlers plan based on evidence and connecting the dots* : Honestly I thought he was here for me and he started ignoring me so out of concern for his safety I demanded he paid attention
Red robin: And?
Batman: and he said âoh you donât want me to pay attention to youâ and showed me.. a lot of details and screenshots I donât know how he got his hands on
Red robin:
Batman: Riddler also then attempted to escape and Clark just.. punched him so hard Riddler still doesnât know which universe heâs in..
Red robin: well it couldâve been worse.. Clark couldâve pulled out a gun
Batman: .. he has a flamethrower
Red Robin: IM SORRY WHAT
Batman: .. and he told me we should work together sometimes, and I gave him few crime stories and plots to help raise awareness for the public and stop them.
Red robin:
Batman: also he gave me a therapy card.
=========
Give me ray of sunshine and leader Superman with no sense of self preservation Bruce Wayne
Superman: Good evening Mr. Wayne, thereâs a credible threat against you so Iâll be on the lookout for today-
Bruce *sidling upto him* : .. damn.. when I said send your hottest stripper you did deliver..
Superman *beet red* : Im not the stripper sir!
Bruce: Really?
Superman *furious nodding*
Bruce: okay then.. hey listen, Iâve been learning about important dates in history lately.. do you wanna be one of them?
Superman. Exe has stopped functioning
Later
Superman: Mr. Wayne thereâs a blackout and the building is under attack! Evacuate!
Bruce *running with gunshots behind* : Are you outside? Youâre invulnerable right? Nothing can hurt you? Not even gunpowder or explosives?!
Superman *touched and pleasantly surprised* : yes.. so you donât have to worry about me Mr. Wayn-
*glass breaks and Superman catches the dark mass falling in the air*
Superman: See? Youâre safe-
*realises heâs holding a huge bomb about to detonate*
One explosion later
Superman: ⌠you threw a bomb at me
Bruce: What?? You said you were invulnerable! I didnât know what else to do with it??
Superman: So you didnât think to tell me? Not even a warning?
Bruce: Listen that bomb was hot but compared to how smoking hot you were I didnât think it ever stood a change
Superman: Mr. Wayne, listen. You shouldâve atleast yelled or said something so I couldâve gotten it away in time. What if I hadnât?
Bruce: I did! I yelled GET READY FOR A BLOWJOB
Superman:
Bruce:
Superman:
Bruce: ?? Did I do something wrong?
========
And obviously.. the usual golden retriever Superman x black cat Batman that we all know and love so Iâm just going to leave it at:
Batman: Someone is going to die.
Superman: Of fun!
Batman: Sure if you consider burning to death fun
Superman:
Superman: Oh come on be a little optimistic! We must have hope! We will persevere!
Batman: we are literally being held hostages by aliens
Superman: ..listen okay, let me do the talking. We just gotta de-escalate the situation
Alien: You intruders! You will never get our superior defender systems-
Batman *done with this bullshit* : I already hacked into it twenty days ago and found all of your identities, families and now have full control over your systems of defends and weapons. If I wanted to hurt somebody.. I wouldâve done so already.
Alien *tries to punch him, gets headbutted instead*
Alien *chuckles* : You have a thick skull Batman..
Batman:
Superman *frantic whispering*: Dontsayitdontsayitdontsayitdontsayit-
Batman: .. atleast mines protecting a brain. Wish I could say the same for yours
Superman *heavy sigh*
#superman#batman#superman x batman#superman x Bruce wayne#batman x Clark kent#Bruce wayne x Clark kent#dc#robin#red robin#Tim drake#riddler#the riddle#the batman#batman and robin#dick grayson#red hood#jason todd#batfam#nightwing#bruce wayne#superbat
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Imagine intentionally making Sabo cry
I wrote this while a little intoxicated as I was catching up with the latest one piece episode. I didn't remember most of the Revolutionary Army members' names in the moment, so I improvised. I have elected to keep the improvisations while including the actual names because I found them funny.
That steampunk cat-looking MF (Lindbergh): oh no, Sabo got poison in his eyes. We need to wash it out!
Goth dude (Karasu): we don't have any water!
Sabo: that's okay guys I'll just die, I wouldn't want to be a bother. [Wiping tears on his sleeve]
Koala: [has an idea] We need water to get the poison out of his eyes, but he has the water in him! He needs to cry! Quickly everyone! Say something sad!
Giant bearded school girl (Morley): dead puppy
Flag bitch (Belo Betty): dead vibrator
Sabo: [snorts] Guys, stop, I'm fine, really.
Koala: no like, it has to be really personal. Like Robin told me, she missed you the most out of the two of us.
Sabo: she did? [Clearly moved]
Dragon: [touches Sabo on the shoulder] he told me the same thing.
Sabo: Guys, I told you I'm fine.
You: I think we'll need to pull out the big guns. I was saving this for if we ever became enemies, but here we go [squats down in front of Sabo and fixes him to the spot with direct eye contact]
Sabo: (â ââ ââ Čâ ââ ) / / Oh?
You: Ace died thinking he'd, finally, get to see you again in the afterlife.
Sabo: WTF (Y/n)! {starts bawling]
Dragon: [stares at you quietly] ... Well damn
Ivankov: Well, we need to get you to cry, Sabo.
Sabo: I'm a literal fire-man, this poison is from a plant, it just burns up in my eyes! It has no effect on me!
You: then why are your eyes so red?
Sabo: It was because there was ash in them, but now it's, also, because you ripped out my heart!
You: ... Sorry
List of Up-and-coming works || Master list || Twitter| Kofi || Patreon
#one piece#one piece x reader#one piece imagine#sabo#revolutionary sabo#revolutionary army#koala one piece#monkey d dragon#emporio ivankov#morley#belo betty#lindbergh#Karasu#from the depths of the dragon's hoard#tma original#9/5/24#no beta we die like men
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Rodeo Buckinâ
Every year, my cousins and I take a fun and much needed trip to the rodeo. You might think itâs a little country, but itâs a real melting pot of cultures, the good food, the music, the performances, and ugh the food.
This year my cousin Jane brought her fiance and the whole family was left swooning.
Mario was such a mans man or at least the manliest man my cousins been with in her life. He was a gentleman to all of us offering to buy our food, hold our place in lines, or even giving our smallest cousins a boost to see all the action during the nights big events.
I was so tired from working overtime this week at work and almost fell into a ditch when Mario caught me. Wooo I donât think a man has ever securely held me like that in my life. He wasnât obscenely tall but he was well built and always clean cut. I think my cousin said he was a nurse or medical assistant of some kind so he also made good money.
We all split up to enjoy all the rodeo fun. After a few hours I headed to some of the petting zoo stuff just to relax after a long evening out in the heat. I turned the corner and found Mario near the restrooms making out with some other woman. I couldnât help myself and loudly gasped at the sight. We all thought he was a gentleman but more than anything it proved he was just another whore. He turned to see me and began to hurriedly approach me and thatâs when I ran to find my cousin and let her know the truth.
He was way more athletic than I was so I was at a disadvantage but to my aid came a security guard who saw the built man chasing me. But I was wrong, it was definitely not a security guard for the rodeo. I slid around a corner out of Marioâs sight when the stoic guard yanked me to the side. Mario ran by searching around for me but I was hidden behind the guard.
âThank you sir, but why did you protect me?â I asked somewhat intimidated.
The stoic man stood above me and simply nodded. He guided me to an inconspicuous looking tent. He nudged me to walk inside and I obliged. I didnât understand what I was looking at in the dim room. A weakly glowing orb in the middle of the room had what sounded like a crying creature inside of it. I began hearing a voice as I approached it cautiously despite not seeing any mouths moving on the small orange lizard looking creature inside the orb.
âI need a hostttttt.â the voice inseminated into my head.
âA host? I canât really take in a pet or a roommate right now?â I said without trying to be too sarcastic.
âI sense youâre running from a predatorâŚ.bring it here so I can live.â
âA predator? Oh do you mean Mario? What are you going to do to him?â
âHe will be my host so I can continue living to conquer this planet.â
âI donât really know how youâre going to do all that with Mario but I mean I can do my best.â
I left the tent and saw him still angrily searching for me nearby. I yelled his name before looking around as if I hadnât. When he saw me he gunned it straight to me and I slowly walked back into the dark tent.
Thatâs when the stoic man grabbed Mario and restrained his arms behind his back. He then escorted my cousins fiance in front of the lizard like creature. The voice started making sounds that I couldnât really make out as Mario yelled expletives at me to tell the man to let him go and when he got free he would mess me up.
The walls in the tent started thrashing around as if there was a hurricane outside and as I ran towards the door to see what was going on. A strong gust of wind pushed me back so hard I fell on the ground and hit my head before passing out.
When I came to I saw a figure checking itself out in a bright room mirror. My eyes came back into focus to realize that I was on the floor of the restroom at home and that figure was Mario. I recoiled out of fear that he was about to hit me. Mario continued buttoning up his shirt and turned around to me.
âDonât worry Iâm not going to hurt you. You saved me and I owe you my life.â Mario said as I curled up anticipating a strike.
âOh! Itâs you? Youâre inside of Mario? So where is he?â I asked inquisitively.
âHeâs goneâŚonce we choose new hosts theyâre no longer in existence anymore.â
âThatâs kind of sad. But then again he was a freaking cheater.â
âCheater? How did this Mario cheat? Was there a competition ongoing between you and him?â
âWell no, he was dating my cousin. He was making out with someone else.â
âMating hmm? How do you humans make out? Whatâs the goal of the game?â
âDating actually, but oh well I can show you maybe?â
The creatures naivety was my gain as I tried to hide devilish grin. Letâs be real, no matter who was piloting that body âMarioâ is hot as hell.
âHow did we get home anyways? Where is everyone?â
âYour group found us and I carried you to the car. They said you drank too much? They left back to the event and they asked if I would stay to take care of you, whatever that entails.â
âGreat. Iâm going to show you how you can take care of me.â
I lunged at the beefy man and put my hands on his neck. I used one hand to take off his hat and the other to caress the back of his neck as I went in to begin making out. I know heâs engaged to my cousin but screw that right now I needed to know for myself what made Mario so fine to so many people.
I ripped his shirt off and was greeted by a proud torso. Standing up straight and wide, strong arms, plump pecs, and shoulder that could throw me around into any positionâŚand I wanted to put it to work. He stood there unsure what to do next and I moved down to yank his pants and boots off leaving me to view Mario in all his raw glory.
Oh my god thatâs why so many people want him.
âHow does that fit?â I stupidly asked as if Mario would have an answer.
âI donât understand. Fit where?â
âNever mind. I just need you to keep thinking about what makes you excited and happy so you can help me out.â
The new Mario likely thought about conquering the world and not me like I wanted but nonetheless the objective was met. Mario's body knew what to do and while he was a shower, maybe he was also partially a grower. It was already thick but itâs getting thicker?
I eagerly greeted the scarily wide tool into my mouth and the new Mario finally had a human reaction. Moaning louder than Iâve ever heard Mario even make sounds. Insatiable is the only way I could describe how I felt. I kept wanting more and the creature kept cooing at the pleasure I was giving it. I could keep taking what it wanted while it got what it wanted. I guided his muscular hands to my the back of my head as he began bobbing my head up and down.
He started picking up the pace and I got an idea. Well I missed the rodeo so this was my change to ride the horse myself.
I got up and he looked at me with yearning eyes. He wanted to finish so badly but I remained in control. I turned myself around and bent over. I told him to put his hands on my waist and begin to buck it hard and fast. And did he ever. Using the muscles alien to his usage I could feel all the efforts Mario put in at the gym going in and out of me. Pleasure mixed with pain in the best ways.
I could tell he was nearing the big moment because he left me breathless. It was an unbelievable pounding. I didnât actually think Iâd be able to take him all but I was determined to feel it all myself.
âUnhh ohhhhnnnnn. What is thisssss?â
I could feel the warmth envelop my insides. Woah that was hands down the best Iâve ever had. I kinda wanted to go again. I bit my lip and told him that he would need to go take a shower while I collected myself.
I saw him take a few selfies as I got up to collect myself.
âOn second thought I think I need to come with you to show you how to clean off Mario.â the devilish grin returned to my face
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Iâm sure you could pt. 1
Masterlist
Pairings: Natasha romanoff x reader
Prompt: y/n follows Natasha to Norway. What happens when they go out? (Loosely based off of black widow events)
Warnings: fights, mentions of cuts and injuries, no smut but almost, mentions of death. No actual death though.
A/N: Iâm working really hard on this one but itâs taking a bit out of me. I decided to create two parts to it. Because Iâm basically going with the black widow movie. But including r. So have fun. Tell me if you think I should add something to part two!
Y/nâs pov
âNATALIA ALIANOVNA ROMANOVA OPEN THIS FUCKING DOOR RIGHT NOW!â
I am pounding on the door of the trailer and Natasha opens it with a gun in her hand and she quickly covers my mouth and pulls me inside.
âShut the fuck up youâre gonna get me caught!â
I storm past her and say
âNo you shut the fuck up! What were you thinking?!â
She sighs and says
âDetka please-â
âNo! Donât baby me! I am so pissed with you.â
âPlease let me explainâ
I huff and say
âGo on then. Explain to me why you left with no note not even a call! You could have been dead for all I know and I was just at home waiting for you!â
I start pacing back and forth in the little space there is.
âI know Iâm not an avenger and Iâm not all special like you are, but as your wife I deserve the decency to hear when youâre running away!â
âIt wasnât safe!â
I shake my head in frustration she keeps explaining
âIt never is safe right nat?â
âThey are after me. Everyone is after me right now. I felt horrible but I had to get rid of my everything because of it. I double crossed tony and the government.â
I let out a frustrated groan and she finally realizes how bad my breathing is. She knows itâs gonna be bad if I donât calm down soon so she says
âBaby. I need you to breathe with me. In. And out. In. And out.â
I take a few more breaths and then I look back up at her
âI thought you were deadâ
My eyes fill with tears and she says
âOh dorogoy. Im so sorry.â
I start to sob and she wraps her arms around me and I grab onto her shirt as if sheâs going to disappear if I let go. I start to rant into her chest.
âI thought Iâd never see you again and you just were going to run off. You always do this Natalia I am always so scared. I wish youâd have come home and taken me with you.â
âYou know itâs not that simpleâ
I nod my head and keep crying.
After a long while I finally am able to calm down and we get up and go to the bedroom to talk. Natasha starts with a question naturally
âHow did you know where I was?â
I sigh and say
âThis guy named mason broke into the compound somehow and told me after I almost shot him.â
She laughs and says
âHeâs always been like that. Stupidâ
I nod my head in agreement and Natasha asks another
âHow did you get here? Do you think anybody followed you?â
I shake my head and say
âMason made sure to get me here with nobody on my trail.â
I decide itâs my turn for a question
âAre you hurt anywhere?â
She shakes her head and says
âClint threw me on the ground pretty hard but not bad. I think I got a few bruises but not much moreâ
I nod my head and say
âLet me see youâ
She sighs knowing I need confirmation that she is not damaged too badly. Iâve always been like that.
So she stands up and takes off her shirt and does a slow 360 for me. Before she can turn back around I wrap my arms around her waist from behind and move her hair to the side so I can kiss her neck.
I trail my hands under her breasts and then move to the back and say
âIs this okay?â
She nods her head and whispers
âYesâ
I unhook her bra and let it slide down. I immediately start kneading her boobs softly making her let out some soft moans.
Her head rolls back and she turns around eventually to do the same for me. She kisses me softly and says
âLet me make you feel goodâ
I sigh and say
âNatty I donât want to make you tiredâ
She chuckles and shakes her head
âYou give me life baby. You could never make me tired.â
I raise my eyebrow and say
âI donât know about that. Iâm sure I could if I triedâ
She smiles and kisses me tenderly
âIâm sure you could detkaâ
Before we actually get anywhere the generator goes out and everything turns off.
I groan and say
âWhy now?â
She chuckles and says
âWe donât need lightsâ
I smile and say
âNo. But I think we should figure it out before we fall asleep and then freeze.â
She sighs and says
âYouâre rightâ
And as she is getting off of me I mumble
âAs alwaysâ
Nat turns to me
âWhat was that?â
I look away innocently and say
âNothing!â
She slaps my arm and throws on her bra and shirt again. We both go outside to investigate. Well. I investigate and she stands guard.
You can never be too safe.
Unfortunately the generator has run out of gas. So we need to go into town to fill up the little gas can we have.
We load up and go on our way. I smile at her from the passenger seat until we cross a bridge and a bomb goes off throwing us around.
I black out for a few minutes and once I am fully conscious again I look around and find nat next to me unharmed. But I look around for the perpetrator and see this person in a suit. It looks weird. But Natasha already is in action.
She unbuckles and falls making the car move. I finally realize that weâre hanging over the bridge. I shakily say
âNat?â
She turns to me and says
âGet out and get as far away as possible through the backseat okay?â
âIâm not gonna leave you here with that maniac!â
âHeâs here for me. Not you. Go!â
I know sheâs telling the truth. Itâd be no good if Iâm hurt and sheâd have to handle me too so I slip out the door and she starts shooting at him.
They start fighting and I see a brief case that looks like it has important vials in it. Honestly these things look like magic. So I grab them swiftly and sneak off.
I hide in some bushes and Natasha and the robot person fight more. From the looks of it they are copying her exact moves. Like they know exactly what sheâs doing.
This is terrifying since she is never predictable.
Suddenly. They end up staring right at each other and as Natasha analyzes this things armor, it turns towards me. I know Iâm hiding in a bush but I think it can see me.
She says
âYouâre not here for meâ
And she looks around for something. I widen my eyes and realize heâs here for the briefcase that I have in my hands.
Natasha knows it too so she runs at the armored person and they fight a bit more.
Natasha clearly knows what sheâs doing so she yells
âThrow the case y/n!â
I donât think and just listen to her so I throw it on the bridge and they fight to get to it. But Natasha gets there first.
They fight again and Natasha uses the persons shield that oddly looks like caps shield. But before she can win he kicks her off the bridge and I almost scream out but I remember they might come for me too so I stay silent as tears run down my face constantly.
They end up with the briefcase and I look and see that there is nothing in it. Clearly nat took it out before they kicked her off. But thereâs no fucking point.
Once they leave and I see the way is clear I run down the side of the bank to the water. Itâs a little steep and I slip making me fall a lot but I donât even care. I donât stop running.
I get to the water and start looking around.
Nobodyâs pov
âMy baby! No. No no no no. No no. You canât be gone. Please Natasha nat please. I need you.â
Words start to roll out of y/nâs throat uncontrollably, but nobody can hear.
Y/n is on her knees at the river bank with cuts and scrapes all over them.
They look around and then start crawling to the water. Somehow their brain isnât functioning properly and they just start looking for Natasha while repeating the same things over and over like a crazy person.
Until a gasp comes from the water and y/n looks up to see Natasha coming out on the other side.
She immediately scrambles up and says
âNat?!â
They canât hear her speak and they just lie down. Suddenly they pull some red glowing ball out of their jacket.
Y/nâs pov
That red shit is the stuff that was in Natashaâs briefcase! Itâs her!
I almost yell her name when she gets up and starts looking around. I find my phone which somehow didnât break in the crash or my fall and I turn the flashlight on and wave it at her.
I realize that if I yell at her it might alert that person again. I donât want that.
She sees the light and knows itâs me. So I make my way over the hill and cross the burning bridge and climb back down much slower this time.
âNat?â
âY/n?â
We both sigh in relief when we recognize each other.
I run to nat and say
âAre you okay?!â
She nods her head still a bit winded from being under water
I tear up and say
âI swear to god if I ever find that person Iâm gonna kill them.â
She shakes her head thinking and says
âYou shouldnât be here. You need to go homeâ
I look at her like sheâs crazy and say
âAnd leave you for that thing?! No fuckjng way!â
I can tell sheâs in black widow mode right now
âY/n⌠you donât know what weâre dealing with right now. I need you to go home. I need you to be safeâ
I huff and say
âIâm not going anywhere.â
âWhy wonât you listen to me!â
âBecause! I am only safe with you. If you send me home nobody can protect me as well as you can. You are the only one that can help me sleep at night. You are my safety.â
She sighs and shakes her head knowing itâs a losing battle.
Suddenly I look down into her hands and in one, she is holding the red stuff, but in the other, is a little paper.
âWhat is that?â
She looks up at me and says
âWhat is whatâ
I look her in the eyes to be a bit confrontational and say
âWhatâs in your hand?â
She holds up the red vials and says
âUh- I actually donât know. But Iâm going to figure it outâ
âNo no. Not that hand. That handâ
I point to the other hand.
âWhat? Oh- nothing.â
âCut the act Natasha. Tell me what is in your hand.â
She hesitates but hands it to me
âWho are these kids?â
âMe. AndâŚâ
My eyes widen and I say
âYelenaâŚâ
She nods her head and I say
âShe got out?!â
Nat shrugs her shoulders and says
âWe can talk about this in a bit. We need to get somewhere safe. Where they canât get to usâ
I nod my head and we walk back to the trailer making sure nobody is on our trail.
We sit down and Natasha and I take a second to look at each other and take each other in.
Only now does she realize the cut I got on my forehead because of my fall.
âIâm so sorryâ
I shrug and say
âNot your fault. I went too fast down the hill looking for you and fellâ
She laughs a bit at my clumsiness.
âIâm glad someoneâs getting a kick out of thisâ
She tends to my wounds and I tend to hers as she tells me everything.
âIf youâre coming with me you have to understand the dangers of this. Weâre dealing with the red room hereâ
I nod my head and say
âI might not know much but I at least train with you for hand to hand. And I can shoot.â
She nods her head and says
âI donât know if Yelena is truly out. She could have just been on a mission.â
âOn a mission where?â
âBudapestâ
I smile and say
âYouâre one of the only people I know who say Budapest correctly.â
She nods her head and continues
âIâm hoping sheâs still there. If not I donât know what Iâll do. But mason brought these to me from my hideout there. So she might be laying low if she actually escaped.â
I nod my head and kiss the last wound I just cleaned up for her. Now I move on to brushing and re-braiding her hair.
âWho was that robot person?â
âI donât know. But from the looks of it, theyâre from the red room. So itâs probably not a guy. The red room utilizes women and their weaknesses. That person has been training to fight me since they were a girl.â
I nod my head and say
âWhy donât they look like any other widows?â
âIâm not sureâ
I keep braiding my hair and just say what pops into my head.
âDo you think this girl is special to the red room? Like. Maybe sheâs dreykovs daughterâ
She shakes her head.
âImpossible. She died when I bombed the both of them. I didnât mean to get her, but I had to get him and that was my only time slot.â
I nod my head in understanding and say
âOkay.â
She stands up when I finish the braid and says
âWeâre going to Budapest. Grab your things.â
I look around and say
âI donât have any things. For some reason I just left.â
She sighs and grabs some extra clothes for me.
Before we leave she grabs my hands and says
âBefore we go, I canât in good conscience let you come with me without telling you the dangers of this. We could very likely both dieâ
I nod my head and say
âI know. But thereâs no one Iâd rather die with than you. Iâm not worried though. I know youâll keep me safe.â
She smiles and kisses me and says.
âI could always kick your ass and make you stay hereâ
I smile and use her words from earlier.
âIâm sure you could babyâ
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
A/N: Iâm totally gonna make a part two donât worry. You just might have to wait a little bit :)))
Part two
Taglist
@ilovesnat @ihartnat @marvelnatasha12346 @moistblobfish
#natasha romanoff#marvel#avengers#fanfic#natasha romanoff x reader#natasha x reader#fanfiction#black widow#mcu
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