#oh it’s hanlon’s razor - never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity

[coffee-at-annies]

But Pittsburgh was open spelled without the h in its early days as a city, no? I suspect the tweet writer was incorporating that knowledge into their joke about ye olden dayes

Nah. I think the person spelled it wrong. There’s several cities named Pittsburg so spellcheck won’t catch it and it’s twitter, people don’t give a shit about historical accuracy they care about making a quick joke and staying under the character limit.

[uncloseted]

How do I become more empathic towards people and towards myself as well? I’ve noticed that in often lack empathy towards people’s mistakes and their feelings afterwards, like just as an example when Effy feels hurt about Freddie and Katie, I thought “you chose Cook, so you have no right to feel that way” and it extends toward myself I’ll make a mistake and when I regret it I tell myself “well you knew the consequences so you have no right to be scared or upset”.

I think empathy comes from understanding why people make the choices that they do.  When it comes to empathy for yourself, I would make a point of asking yourself why you did what you did, what caused you to form the beliefs that made you think that choice was a good idea, and what beliefs you might want to change in light of what happened.  

To take an example from Skins, if you can say, “oh, I hurt Freddie’s feelings by sleeping with Cook.  I did that because I’m afraid of being vulnerable. I’m afraid of being vulnerable because I’m afraid people won’t love me for who I am.  I’m afraid people won’t love me for who I am because my parents have always wanted me to be a perfect little girl, but I feel like I’ll never meet that expectation because of my mental illness/because I was born backwards,” then I think it’s easier to have empathy for yourself because you’re just reacting in the best way you knew how given all the things that you’ve experienced. 

With other people, I think taking a similar tact works.  Imagining all the different interpretations of their action, all of the possible reasons they thought their action was a good idea, and what caused them to form those beliefs, it’s easier to be empathetic towards them because you can see where they’re coming from, and you can imagine that maybe you would have done the same thing if you were in their situation.

The last thing I’ll say is that I think it makes a big difference to assume that people are trying their best and want to be good.  I think Hanlon's razor is very true- one should never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.  People are frequently ignorant or selfish or oblivious or hurt, but they’re very rarely actively trying to cause harm or pain.  Having that assumption as a starting place makes it much easier to give people the benefit of the doubt and respond empathetically to them.

[prorevenge]

Contract Negotiations in a Second Language

This one's a bit bit, sorry for the length, I've tried to cut it down... hard to do without losing some twists and turns in the story. Hope you think it's worth it, I sure do!

TLDR @ the End.

I work in China as an English teacher. There are hundreds of great jobs out here, but at least an equal portion of people trying to screw you in every way possible. Each company I've worked with has been an education in paperwork, contract negotiations, and leverage. 6 years in, I'd like to think I'm finally getting the hang of it. 6 years working here isn't unheard of, but it's rare, and my level of education/job experience (plus standard white face) sells for quite a premium here.

At this private school I'm one of 3 foreign teachers, a job that carries a lot of prestige locally, and brings in a lot of students (read $$$), as only certain schools are even permitted to hire foreigners and even less can afford/find them. During recruitment periods, parents are paraded into my classroom, and I'm sometimes given bonuses because of how often I'm complimented on my energy, teaching style, even handsomeness (this matters in China... I'm NOT handsome, but white in rural China is auto-handsome). The other foreign teachers here are African--and yes, there's a substantial racial bias, and they get paid much less. I've chosen this school, because it's got the lowest cost of living area with the highest offered salary---but most importantly the highest amount of free time. I work about 20 hours per week, save 70% of my salary, and spend the rest traveling. I had negotiated a VERY competitive salary. I also signed a non-standard contract that I had personally edited. I was proud of myself... at least until....

I arrived at the school and the international staff liaison immediately asked me to sign their 'standard contract'--the earlier one was a mistake, and couldn't be submitted for my visa. I now knew this was one of "those schools" I'd heard stories... they would do anything to screw over the 老外 (foreigner). I pulled up my big-boy britches. ... I needed to be prepared. ... I wasn't...

Initially, I didn't even read the "standard contract," it offered me only 2/3's of my agreed upon salary, so I told them to update that. They returned (days later) and I read it--a horrific document that would lose me: my Christmas holiday (a great luxury in China), my salaried status (a shift to per/class pay with no pay for canceled classes), and even allow them to charge me if I leave without finishing my contract. More terrifying still? "additional 'activities' or 'events' could be assigned without pay or notice" apparently at any time. The contract would also require me to locate another foreign teacher 'replacement' before allowing me to sever employment, and prevented me from leaving this school for any competing school in China.

"Everyone signs it!" was chanted at me by four separate workers (all of the English speakers in the building), each appalled that I was arguing. I informed them "I'm not everyone. We'll stick to my contract."

(I found out later, everyone apparently does sign it. They just don't bother following it. The other foreign teachers just run away on payday. The school has lost more than 10 teachers this way.)

Four individual attempts were made to rewrite the "standard" contract to include what I had negotiated for. Each new version left out new things... (I hate to ignore Hanlon's Razor: "Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity." , but we were approaching the edge of Occam's Razor here... "The simplest explanation is usually true.") God, I prayed they were only stupid! By the end, I simply wrote the contract using their format.

Except by then we were 6 months into the school year. Operating that long without an official contract in China is dangerous, and can allow the government to seize my 'illegal wages.' But there were just 3 more months until summer vacation... except...

that's when the school decided that they didn't want to pay my summer salary. Now my paperwork clearly said that I was a salaried employee, and that I was to be paid whether they had classes or not. Summer had no classes, I pointed out, but I still get paid. ... I hadn't anticipated them creating a summer school just to give me classes. But, the dates for 'summer holiday' wasn't specified, so I lost three weeks of my vacation to their "summer classes." At the meeting where I debated the ambiguities in the contract, seeking some discussion, a meeting of the minds, the boss lady simply demanded, "Will you comply with the contract you signed or not?" [This remains the most English and the only grammatical English she's ever spoken within my hearing.]

Would I do what I signed up for? Fuck. ... I would.

...but contract negotiations were already starting... for the school year (by now) beginning in only two months. I hadn't been prepared before, but I was determined to get my 3 weeks back.

The initial plan was to set my demands so high that eventually insisting on getting 3 weeks vacation or 3 weeks extra pay would seem reasonable. I rejected the three contracts they offered me (each one a version I had already seen and refused the year before), the foreign staff liaison (FL) suggested that I again write the contract myself, so I would be happy with it. I sighed, and uttered , "好吧," (a reluctant "Fine.") Don't mind if I do!

I had three contract versions sent to them by the end of the day. (They were just modified versions of my last 3 employers)-- but they were written in amateur and heavy English legalese. Poor ESL (English Second Language) workers never had a chance. They balked.

Now, my email clearly explained that each contract offered different benefits, each a separate option I'd accept: One gave me less classes/week, one provided substantial penalty fees for each week my salary was delayed, one insisted that my "holiday" salary for the year (3 months) be paid immediately. Additional benefits tossed in at random: sick days, penalties for not giving notice of canceled classes/holidays, (as opposed to the less than 24 hours notice I'd heretofore received). I even added my water/electric bill, cafeteria meal card, and internet to the list.

Overwhelmed by the complexity of the documents... FL asked for the 3 to be combined into a single document. I did, again reminding them that they contained several options, and this time adding that it was really an initial negotiating position. I'm quite certain that reminder was never read. Well, I combined the documents... every potentially reasonable request I had managed to concoct over 2 months was thrown together into the final draft.

I imagine FL having a quiet heart attack upon reading it, knowing sending it to the boss was akin to a suicide attempt. That's when they stopped paying me.

I had now agreed to working one summer month [okay, 3 weeks] "free" (as it should have been a holiday), and now I had worked another month, but payday arrived without them paying my salary... my legal options were pretty unknown to me, it's not my legal system, and I can barely parse a Chinese sentence, much less read legalese... I continued to work, and occasionally remind them about needing paid... as I neared two months behind in salary... we began "negotiations."

These contract negotiations were more stressful than any breakup I've ever had: First, I would be called into the office, berated at for being ungrateful (usually) for hours, have it explained that I was being unreasonable, told precisely how much each of the workers in the office made (fractions of my salary), and then asked to make some concessions, ... I told them they'd receive concessions only if they made some proportionate concessions on their end. (This is China. None of the people I was talking to were authorized to make any concessions, they were just aware the boss lady/owner (HRH-- Her Royal Highness) was NOT HAPPY with my requests [or perhaps would be not happy?--I still don't know if/when she read the contract]) But there was nothing they could do... I started playing games on my laptop while waiting for them to run out of stamina. I wracked up 120+ hours on the game. Wake up. Go to class. Go to meetings. Get yelled at. Lunch break, go home, nap, return in the afternoon for a repeat performance. Had this for an entire two weeks with little variation... well sometimes the meetings were before class, sometimes the meetings were after. Variety is the spice of life! I began to look forward to classes, as they were a reason to escape "meetings."

Finally, someone must have decided I wasn't going to budge, and the contract was sent to the boss for approval. My demands had been shuffled, reworded, and buried in paragraphs--but the content was largely unchanged.

HRH immediately made a (6+ hour) trip to the school from Beijing for our meeting. Upon her arrival HRH stood for a photo session with me, I was given chocolates, wine, the (ceremonial) position of vice principal, and the promise of a raise. (I hadn't even considered a raise! I made way too much for the region as it was! But it'd been promised, so I added it into my next draft.) The meetings lasted 3 days on and off. (Although my time with her was less than 3 hours total, because we were constantly interrupted by investors, new students, parents, etc.)

On the third day, I left the meeting (for lunch) with the regretful promise that I would begin looking for work elsewhere. I already had four interviews scheduled for the afternoon.

No sorry, I couldn't possibly return to the meetings, I've already scheduled an interviews until 4. Yes, I know, it's important, but I've already scheduled the meeting. ... Okay... okay... No. I have a meeting. .... Yes. I understand. ... No, I still have a meeting... I'll come over immediately after. ... Oh, HRH wants to talk? ... Sorry, still have an interview. ... No, I won't cancel... Yes, HRH is very very busy... well, it's very kind of you to (finally) give me that promised raise, but I have promised to have these meetings, and I keep my promises. Buh-bye.

[Between interviews] I'm sorry. I have an interview now, and can't answer your direct messages, but yes, some sick days is reasonable... I've g2g... That'd be nice... The Wechat [Chinese skype/facebook] call is starting. Buh-bye.

I arrived to a very different meeting. My boss was sitting in a room of 6 police officers with a pile of money on the table bigger than a large suitcase. I was certain she was paying them to arrest me. 'Oh fuck,' I thought. 'HRH is real fucking hardcore. What the fuck was I doing?'

I was told that I wasn't allowed to leave the school, that my contract only allowed me to work for her. I agreed that might be the case, (suddenly, I was in a very agreeable mood) and asked if I could read that part in the contract I'd signed. She picked up the contract and began scanning. The contract said no such thing, but her face never changed as she scanned the substantially altered "standard" contract. Everyone in the room pretended we weren't paying attention to her.

​

She finished scanning. There was a glance at the FL.

"Yes, you will only work for me." She asked me what the other schools were offering, salary-wise. I told her. She rounded up the number and tossed two wads of cash to me, and turned to continue her conversation with the police. "Bring his contract. We're signing it now." A worker snatched the money from my hands and counted out my (very late) salary.

The poor staff. They were still unprepared. (They brought the combined version of the contract that I'd emailed... my first 'final draft'.) HRH didn't even glance at it before signing. I got everything I could have thought to ask for. I celebrated for two weeks--in Thailand.

Epilogue: FL has an easier job (same pay) in a different school now. We're still not friends, but she told me she's grateful to not work here anymore. She won't say it's my fault, (that's not Chinese culture), but I'm 99.99% sure it is. I've bought her gifts, (2) until she stopped accepting them.

This year I promised no new demands in my contract... I just wanted my salary... ... but there were still some changes...

First, since I've accumulated an additional 80% of my yearly salary in fines, (they failed to pay my three months holiday salary up front). I've had my contract reviewed by a Chinese lawyer. It may be not eloquent, (online translated) Chinese, but it would hold up in court. To be honest though, I still feel bad about them signing that insane contract, so I'm holding to the stated intention in the penalties... This year, as an addendum I added: "As the penalty is meant to be corrective, rather than punitive, so long as my wages, and the wages of my fellow employees, are paid on time, the missing fines from last year will not be assessed. All fines will become due, including all subsequent late fees, if any teacher can demonstrate that they have not been paid by the 15th." I calculate that weekly fines will have pushed my punitive figures to 200%+ of my yearly salary by that time. They asked for one change-- I was the only staff member with Christmas off, and it was breeding resentment. Instead of Christmas and Christmas Eve, could I accept instead holiday days in lieu? I wrote the addendum myself. I wrote "Upon request of Party A, instead of the Christmas holiday, Party B will receive an additional 12 paid holiday days." 12.

​

The addendum was returned signed. I can only assume HRH is still not reading my contracts before signing.

I'm now up to 4 months paid holidays, and yesterday I sent the excel spreadsheet with the complete calculations of all fines from last year. There was a panic, until I restated the reminder that the fines will not be assessed so long as I can't validate any complaints about myself or my friends/co-workers not being paid on time. I was assured (again) it wouldn't ever happen.

TLDR: Boss in China screws me out of three weeks vacation, creating special "summer school classes" just to make me work, only possible because of a bad contract translation/ambiguity. So, I rewrite my contract next year- give myself a raise, three weeks of paid vacation, free meals, and nearly extortionate fees for late payments. I could demand 80% of my salary extra this year in penalties alone. Instead, I wrote myself in an additional two weeks of paid vacation. Going to see how long I can keep this up.

(source) story by (/u/StillAdamRoots)

[secretlyfantrolls]

Would you mind elaborating on the callouts and meme one? not trying to start an argument or anything, everyone is tired of callouts now but I'm actually genuinely curious about why you don't like the memes

Genuinely uncertain whether this is bait but... Sure! I’ll put it under a read more so those who don’t care can skip it.

Callouts first. As a disclaimer, I have been called out before for saying some pretty bad, ignorant shit, so my views may be tainted a little, but a lot of folks I know for a fact feel the same way. But hey, those times give a couple of decent examples for me to use, so I’m gonna roll with it.

The key points boil down to three things - culture, upbringing, and growth. People need to realise that this is only an “American website” in so far as it’s hosted in America by an American company. There are folks all around the world on here, and language is different. To use one of my callouts as an example, I used a term to refer to a group of people that I genuinely did not know was considered problematic in America - I assumed it was fine because the news used it. Sometimes, people say things worded poorly, or the word has a different meaning for them in their region.

The second is upbringing. My second callout was me saying something super fucking ignorant that I now know was bad. If it’s bad, why did I think it was okay in the first place? The answer is my upbringing. It turns out my dad is pretty casually racist in that sort of… I guess the kind of way where he’d never hurt anyone but stereotyping and slurs are fine kind of way, so I learnt a lot of habits/opinions through that. I would be willing to bet that’s the case for many people. Some people don’t know any better because that’s how they were raised.

This segues perfectly into the third point, growth. After that callout, it took two weeks before someone actually… explained to me what I’d said, asked me why I’d said it, and sat down and talked with me about it. And that is literally all it took for me to realise I’d said something bad and learn about it. All the callouts did was prompt me to feel shit - someone sitting down and explaining shit to me helped me grow and learn. And honestly, that’s why I don’t like callouts. To me, a callout is a declaration that a person is a lost cause. Some people are just inherently racist or sexist or whatever and in those cases, sure, call them out. But 95% of the time literally you just need to sit down with them for 10 minutes and have a talk.

Hanlon’s Razor says “Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity/ignorance” and that’s pretty much the case in most of the ones I see. People on here have such a preoccupation with holding the moral high ground that they actively try and kick down others. You’re not doing anything useful if you don’t at least TRY and help people grow as a person when they do something problematic, you’re just being a bit of a prick. “It’s not my job to educate you” - well… actually, yeah, it is.

Now the memes.

Look, I’m not going to pretend everyone’s happy and all that, millenials are depressed as fuck. Most of us probably do contemplate suicide at some point. I’m not going to go into my history on that topic because that’s between me and my therapist, but suffice it to say, I have one.

Suicidal ideation should not be normalised. Ever. Like I said, we’re all depressed, sure. But it shouldn’t ever be accepted that that’s the default state we should all be in. I feel like that’s what the memes are doing, it’s reinforcing in people’s minds “this is just how it is and how it’s meant to be” which - I did psychology at college and jesus CHRIST I can’t tell you how fucking harmful that is to a vulnerable person’s psyche.

We’re literally at the point now where we’re telling people it’s normal to want to kill yourself. Like sure, if you’re in your early 20s it might be all “hahaha funny meme” but younger people - and we KNOW they’re seeing this stuff - will absolutely be influenced by that message and probably think feeling like that is normal and not get help.

Maybe I’m taking it all too seriously, but I do genuinely feel sometimes like this stuff minimises both people who’ve made suicide attempts before (”oh well, we all feel like that anyway”) and is going to make people do that stupid thing where they try to start feeling suicidal if they don’t in order to fit in, just like this site and the self-diagnosing craze that happened not that long ago.

[jjnonken]

Right. So. 

I can log into their website and add my car to my “garage”. Cutesy. What if I have another vehicle that’s not a Lexus? Can I add that? Because I’m pretty sure my real garage doesn’t really give a fuck what I put into it. This is a special “garage” that only allows Lexus inside it.

Please don’t do that. Stop trying so hard to engage my sentimentalism. Don’t try to manipulate my emotions. Don’t make me hate my car, I just bought it.

Why is there a picture of a 2020 RX on this page? You lost all your photos of other years? Or are you dangling it in front of me to try to convince me that, against all evidence, I can suddenly afford a brand new model of this car?

There’s a reason I bought a 2014, and it wasn’t because I had piles of money. Here you go again, trying to manipulate me. Put a picture of my car on there, or something generic like your logo. But you won’t upsell me quite so easily, and when people try to manipulate me, it just pisses me off. Witness the fact that I’ve already spent four paragraphs ranting about how you’re trying to manipulate me.

So now you’re pushing your mobile app on me. On one hand, this particular car probably can’t be controlled much from the app; it doesn’t have all the nifty extras. That’s a shame, and I’d have liked to have those extras, but a) it was the right car at the right time and b) not having them probably saved me some money. So I’m OK merely having a luxury SUV with keyless entry, one-button start, garage door opener, compass, sound system, lots of leg room, more than enough engine power, Automatic Everything, comfort and convenience. On the other hand, the app apparently will do things like track when I need to do regular maintenance. I’m notoriously neglectful of my cars, and I’d like to keep this one for a while, so I want to change that. Having a proactive reminder system on my phone should help. Having a reminder on your web site that requires me to log into it first? Not so much. 

So I installed your app. The first thing I noticed is that it is apparently in no way connected to my account on the web site. For all that is holy, why the fuck not? That doesn’t make sense.

So I created an account using the same credentials. (Password security advice rant deleted.) I checked the box that says “KEEP ME LOGGED IN” (all-caps theirs) and clicked Register or Sign In or whatever. So now I’m signed in. I paste the VIN into the field for a VIN and click next, decline to bother with the optional nickname (I really only own one Lexus RX 350 at this time, I think I’ll be able to tell it apart from my bicycle) and click Next or OK or Go or whatever. 

See the last screenshot. If you can’t read it, it says “Provided VIN already associated to a different OEM customer”.

OK, so somebody else used to own this car, registered it with your app, and then sold the car to me. (Presumably not on the same day, but the sequence is the same.) Actually, they sold it to a dealer, who then sold it to me. And it’s also possible that the first owner registered it, sold it on, and the second owner never bothered or was unable to register it, and so the sequence has extra steps in it that I’m missing. Either way, it seems that Toyota is unable to grasp a concept, so I’ll try to explain it here.

Dear Toyota slash Lexus: Some time after people buy a vehicle, they may sell it and buy an upgrade. Usually the car they sell is still drive-able, so somebody with a lesser budget will purchase the now-used vehicle and drive it around for a while. Often cars will change hands multiple times before their lives are over.

That means that there’s a chance that whomever registered the car via the app may, at some point, no longer be the owner. That, in turn, means that there’s a good chance the new owner will want to use your app. 

That is the case here: I’m the third owner of record of this vehicle, and I’d like to register it via the app. In fact, I’d rather not have what is now a third party to have control of my car via their phone. 

Sorry, what’s that? It turns out you do understand this concept. Oh, I’m sorry, I was applying Hanlon’s Razor, which says that I should never attribute to malice what can be adequately explained by incompetence, and was assuming this was incompetence. 

Because the other choice is that you’re doing this on purpose. And I cannot imagine any reason that you would do this on purpose except to allow prior owners to steal my car or gain access to its contents, and That. Is. A. Lawsuit. Waiting. To. Happen.

So, which is it? A company full of people too stupid to understand this concept, or going out of their way to screw over anybody who can’t afford to buy a new car from you? Because I actually can think of one other answer, which is that you just don’t give a fuck about your customers and you’re too lazy to do it right.

I did look for an option to claim the car. Do you know that Ford had my old Taurus registered under a previous owner as well? Not an app, this was before that was A Thing, but it was on their website. And they had a way for me to claim the car as my own, built right into their website. I no longer own that Taurus, so it’s no longer an issue, but I remember being pleased that I was able to do that.

So, what. Did Ford hire all the smart people, and leave you the morons? Just wondering.

No matter what the answer is, this isn’t a good look for a company making luxury cars: too stupid to understand a simple concept; too greedy; too lazy and not giving a fuck. 

So... what will it take to get the previous owner out of my car?

Ah, here’s their instructional video. I wonder if that will help? Hah hah.

One more complaint. You know that “Keep me signed in” box? Doesn’t work. If I hit the Back key, it returns me to that screen, and I have no choice but to go through the login procedure again (or quit the app. Hobson’s Choice, I guess).

As for whether I got the correct VIN: I’ve recorded the VIN in my password manager and pasted it directly from there. If I have it wrong, I have it definitively wrong. But in either case, there was no typo. I’ll check the VIN again but I’m pretty sure I’ve got it right. [edit] I checked, like, three times. It’s correct.

[genquerdeer]

Reverse Hanlon’s Razor

Hanlon’s razor is a philosophical concept related to Occam’s razor. It goes:

“Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity”

Here is my suggestion for examining actions of fascists, racists, police, Trump administration et cetera: use the opposite approach.

When dealing with fascists, never first attribute to stupidity or mistake that which is adequately explained by malice.

Hanlon’s razor is designed so that in everyday life, you wouldn’t assume malice when there is none.

However, with nazis, Trump, fascists - we KNOW there is malice, that’s the entire point. And assuming they’re just dumb is what they want us to think, sadly. They play up the part of hapless fools and idiots so they will be underestimated. That’s how they won the election, for fucks sake (anyone remembers “Clinton has 99% chance of winning”?). They don’t do what they do by accident.

If you see a poster that talks about “being proud of being white” or “white genocide” - laughing and saying “white people want to be oppressed so bad!” is a mistaken approach, since it most likely was put for a specific reason of nazi propaganda and normalizing nazism. Nazi propaganda doesn’t need to make sense, sense and logic is not the appeal of nazism. So, it’s actually a very rational, and a very scary move.

If you see Trump making some outrageous lie or a twitter tantrum - yeah, he’s probably trying to distract people from something.

There just was a ‘leak from Trump staffers” about Trump behaving like a 70 year old baby or some bullshit like that. Ha, ha! So funny! Oh, and at about the same time, Trump made a bunch of cuts to a shitton of institutions, and Dakota Access Pipeline started up again, and Flint water investigation was closed. Ya’ll still think this shit is accident?

Now, I’m not suggesting going into full conspiracy theory, I’m talking about stuff that you KNOW was done by fash, question is about motivations - I’m talking about recognizing that actions taken by fascists, aren’t accidental. If they seem stupid, then that’s probably the truth - they are supposed to seem stupid.

Instinct to call fascists and right wingers stupid redneck idiots and mock them, ha ha, seems almost irrestible for liberal media, despite not realizing that somehow these ‘idiots’ won election that was supposed to be in the bag. "Idiots” don’t win elections. “Idiots” definitely don’t win elections that they would lose in popular vote count, despite having less support, thanks to an effective manipulation of the voting system.

They’re not stupid. If they were stupid, they’d be much less dangerous than they are.