#oh i guess it's not totally clear the art is brand new. the character was born in march.

[temporalreverie]

yard by yard, always stressed 💥

Damocloves, the pathetic prophetic. my first pony oc, from march 10th.

earth pony who dreamed of becoming a unicorn. awoke one day to find a new horn had appeared overnight, alongside a cutie mark telling her that one day it will be broken. she lets this fear hang over her & seep into all parts of her life. often afraid to use her magic or go out in public.

maybe one day this little filly will burst her bubble and make some friends, despite how her fears and excessive self concern have formed somewhat of an abrasive personality. that horn is bound to break eventually.... and then what?

ignore the nonsensical cutie mark placement. its position isn't part of the design i just wanted it visible in spite of the pose. it's actually on the outside of her thigh like normal.

[ladyloveandjustice]

Wonder Egg Priority: Post-Mortem Spoiler-riffic Thought Dump (Repost)

Since I accidentally deleted the old post, might as well!

Quickest Summary: After her friend commits suicide, Ai Ohto enters a world where she’s promised if she protects the souls of other teenage girl suicide victims from the monsters that embody the horrors that drove them to their deaths, her friend will come back to life. During her journey, she meets three other girls fighting to save their loved ones and begins to form a bond with them.

Yeah so. This show. Sure had potential. The subject matter was dense (self harm, suicide, abuse, marginalization, transphobia, corrective rape, sexual assault, mental illness are just the beginning of the list of issues depicted), the animation was beautiful, and I’m someone who truly loves stories where one wrestles with symbolic and fantastical representations of social and psychological issues,  who loves a magical twist on heavy struggles, it was catnip for me initially. The issue of suicide/depression/trauma/suicidal ideation and how it interacts with girlhood  and adolescence is something that really hits close to home for me. It was clear from the beginning the show had so much potential- the system run by these creepy robot guys exploiting girls trauma and convincing them if they racked up enough wins like a video game they can, y’know, undo suicide is a fascinatingly fraught and rich set up that could have the potential to say powerful thing about the social systems that entrap us, Utena-style. It was also clear that the show had potential to fall apart under too many ideas and horribly mishandle the heavy subject matter and end up being another story by that enforces harmful myths and stereotypes about girls. BOY HOWDY GUESS WHICH ONE IT CHOSE.

The show has some genuinely powerful moments in early episodes (I’d say episode 7 was is maybe where you’d want to stop if you wanted to watch the show and get some enjoyment out of it) and the girls it introduces were all immediately fascinating and had some fantastic moments and the potential to be such great characters- unfortunately, it squandered pretty much all of that by the end of the show, when it introduced a brand new antagonist and a whole host of sci-fi concepts at the last minute with no space or ability to actually explore any of it. (A ROBOT IS SUPPOSEDLY MAKING GIRLS COMMIT SUICIDE Y’ALL IM SERIOUS). The girls who’d made progress on their character arcs were all abruptly retraumatized in a way that felt cruel and didn’t serve the story because again, no time to explore it!

Importantly, one of the central driving mysteries of the show- why Ai’s friend committed suicide- had the most disgusting, insulting answer it was possible to have. I’m not going to bother to dance around it- we had a teacher who was framed extremely creepily the entire show. He crossed definite lines- he drew paintings of his female students and submitted them to art competitions and drew a picture of Ai, in particular, AS AN ADULT WOMAN (???), with the title ���latent heat’ (which is as one reviewer put it is the absolute worst thing he could have called it my soul wants to leave my body), and told her she would be hot like her mom (who he was dating) when she grew up. Those aren’t even red flags okay, that’s like….like…Akio Ohtori’s red car has pulled up in the station (I’m just making Utena references to cope shhh).

Ai’s central conflict was she had a crush on Sawaki but also was suspicious he might be a creep who did something to her friend Koito to contribute to her suicide. The conclusion is, nope, Koito is actually KER-AY-ZY and was in love with Sawaki and when he rejected her she falsely accused him of raping her while threatening to jump to her death and but OOPS that silly girl slipped and died! Oh and she’d totally done this before, driving another man to suicide with a false accusation, because this show supposedly exploring the issues of teenage girls is officially pivoting to “yeah but what about the adult men they’re the REAL victims of those malevolent fifteen year olds” now.

Of course we get this all from Mr. Sawaki, Koito doesn’t get a voice or to tell her side of the story here, because who the fuck cares about that I guess! We just accept Sawaki’s word- Ai doesn’t question it, Koito doesn’t get to say anything because she got amnesia or whatever when she got bought back to life and Ai can’t talk to her and Ai also specifically says she was wrong for being suspicious of a teacher made of red flags. I cannot overemphasize how fucked it is that this show is essentially saying young girls who get bad vibes from adult men (or hey, adults in general but this show only cares about men!) shouldn’t like, listen to themselves and be cautious. What a truly dangerous message to send.

(Also, if Koito made such a fuss, why did Ai never hear about it when she got back to school? It should have been pretty obvious whether she fell vs jumped to onlookers if Sawaki could apparently tell, why did no one say that to Ai? And when he was dating her mom did Sawaki bother to mention “oh yeah your daughter’s best friend, who died, you know the reason she’s a traumatized shut in right now, well she accused me of rape and then that’s why she fell to her death but I promise i did not rape her  also she totally fell she didn’t jump :) I did hug her once which was definitely inappropriate considering what I apparently knew of her history but im a nice guy i swear :) anyway I’m so down to date you and be part of your family I’m sure it will help your daughter recover this a great idea”. Imagine a mother listening to that story and being like “yeah this is fine”.

In the Anifem podcast covering this trashfire, Cy Clewis, who taught in Japan, mentions how when she was teaching there, she heard of a teacher who was caught recording elementary school girls in the bathroom, and he didn’t even lose his teaching license, he just could no longer teach in that city. In a world where these kind things happen, where men still easily escape consequences, THIS is the story show told to tell, and I just want to emphasize how fucked that is.

So yeah, I could talk about other aspects of the show, (the way characters like Momoe and Kaoru in particular are handled is something I encourage you to seek out trans takes on, listening to the anifem podcast is a good start! But hey, at least this picture is super cute I’ll always like it:

LET YOUR FLAG FLY MY GUY)

But does it really matter. That one issue pretty much represents how hard the show fell apart and how utterly it fails in caring about its teen girl characters (plus two teen trans boys) and the reality of teen suicide, how utterly it falls apart in both emotional and narrative logic. I’m tired, so the only other thing I’ll say about I find interesting about this show is it COULD be a study in directors, writers and animators clashing. Nojima, the writer, went on record saying he truly DOES believe teen girls don’t commit suicide for the “logical’ reasons men do and are more impulsive (i know, i hope he steps on a lego, DON’T QUIT YOUR DAY JOB AND GO INTO PSYCHOLOGY), yet the director might not. The animators framing Sawaki as super creepy (Atelier emily goes into it very well) and including a lot of depth to a clumsy story may also be them either having different ideas or actively disagreeing with the writer’s vision.

And let’s not ignore how the show was a disaster for it’s poor animators and it’s possible staff may have even been hospitalized. I should mention this was a 13 episode anime with two recap episodes (one of them being 25 minutes of the 45 minute special that was released three months after episode 12).

Basically, the egg is on everyone’s face, and I feel so sorry for everyone involved (except Nojima because he’s pissed me off). I hope things get better for the anime industry and future ambitious projects like this value the health of the staff and stick their landing.

[uhlikzsuzsanna]

SPOILER WARNING: Do not read if you haven’t seen all of Season 1 of “Loki,” currently streaming on Disney Plus.

Ever since “Loki” first premiered in June, Kate Herron, who directed all six episodes of the Marvel Studios series, has had to pretend like she knew far less than she really does. For one, she couldn’t acknowledge that the homages to sci-fi classics like “Blade Runner” and “Brazil” that she’d baked into the elaborate sets for the Time Variance Authority — the cosmic bureaucracy tasked with maintaining the sacred timeline — were “meant to be sinister” rather than just “playful and quirky.”

For another, Herron was delighted to see fans theorizing after the very first episode that Kang the Conqueror — a character already set to appear in the Marvel Studios feature “Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania,” as played by Jonathan Majors — was really pulling the strings of the TVA. But until the finale streamed last Wednesday, she couldn’t even hint that those fans were only half right: Majors does play the mastermind of the TVA, but he’s a variant of Kang referred to as He Who Remains. It’s only after He Who Remains encounters Loki (Tom Hiddleston) and his female variant counterpart Sylvie (Sophia Di Martino), and Sylvie plunges a blade into his heart, that the multiverse is reborn, creating the possibility for Kang the Conqueror to emerge.

Again, though: Herron couldn’t acknowledge any of that, even to those closest to her.

“Nothing has prepared me better for working with Marvel than playing tabletop games with my friends,” she says with a laugh. “It definitely taught me how to have a good poker face. You have to hide your hand — and sometimes lie.”

Now, thankfully, all of that is behind her — as is “Loki” itself. Despite receiving widespread acclaim for her assured, ambitious, and visually sumptuous work directing the show, Herron says she has decided not to return for Season 2 of the series.

“I gave it everything — in my soul, in my heart, everything,” she says. “I feel so proud of the work we’ve done. And yeah, I’ll be enjoying Season 2 as a fan.”

She’s quick to sing the praises of everyone she worked with at Marvel, and she says she’s “sure” she’ll work again with the studio. For now, however, she’s ready to take a holiday, and then turn to a project she’s writing herself “that’s really close to my heart that I really want to make.”

“It’s my own decision, but I just feel like my part with ‘Loki’ is finished now and I’m just excited to see where his story goes,” she says.

Before she parts ways for good, however, Herron spoke with Variety about bringing Jonathan Majors into the Marvel Cinematic Universe, what she thought of the shocking revelation about infinity stones and what she would like to see happen in Season 2.

She always knew “Loki” would introduce Kang and the Multiverse…

From the very start, Herron says, she and head writer Michael Waldron knew that their six-episode run of “Loki” would always end with Loki and Sylvie meeting He Who Remains at his citadel, the result of which would cause the creation of the multiverse.

As Episode 6 makes clear, both of these events were massive turning points for the future of the MCU — and Herron still can’t quite believe she got to be the one to make them a reality.

“We were just, like, waiting to be told, ‘Actually, guys, we’ve had a change [of heart],'” Herron says. Instead, Herron says she and “Quantumania” director Peyton Reed participated in casting Majors in the role.

“I was just like, pinch me,” she says. “I can’t believe I was at the table for that, because I know it was such a big decision for them all.”

Herron also decided to have Majors provide the voices for all three “Timekeepers” who are supposedly at the head of the TVA, but are revealed by Sylvie to be nothing more than “mindless androids.”

“We didn’t have someone cast for those voices,” she says. “I remember thinking, well, ‘Wizard of Oz’ is clearly a reference for us. We should have the wizard. It’d be great if it’s Jonathan. So we sent him all the art of the timekeepers. And he just kind of came up with these incredible voices for each of them.”

…but not with a cliffhanger.

The most significant decision of the season, though, may be that it ends with a giant cliffhanger, when Loki discovers he’s in a brand new reality for the TVA in which Mobius (Owen Wilson) and Hunter B-15 (Wunmi Mosaku) don’t even recognize him. But while Herron knew how this season of “Loki” would end, at first, she did not know that there would be any more seasons after it.

“When I started, there wasn’t a discussion of Season 2, exactly,” she says. “It was just that season of ‘Loki.’ As we got deeper into production, everyone was very happy, and obviously there’s so much to explore with Loki. It felt like we should continue the story. So I think the cliffhanger ending came in later in the process.”

Herron says she sprinkled in some hints to viewers that Loki is in a new timeline, like redressing sets to look slightly off, and recasting Eugene Cordero’s TVA receptionist Casey as a hunter headed to the armory in a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it moment. But her favorite bit is that the final line — said by Mobius to Loki — is the same as the first line spoken in the show, by a woman in the Gobi desert, also to Loki: “Who are you?”

“That was kind of the question of the whole first season,” Herron says.

She was just as shocked about the Infinity Stones as everyone else.

In the first episode, Loki discovers to his horror that not only does his magic not work inside the TVA, but Infinity Stones — heretofore believed to be the most powerful objects in the known universe — are just inert rocks there. The revelation sent shockwaves across the Marvel fandom; Herron was right there with them.

“That was in Michael’s script when I first got it to pitch [for the directing job],” she says. “I remember being like, ‘WHAT?! You put me through so much!’ But then I thought, ‘Oh, it’s kind of genius, because it shows how powerful the TVA are. Who are these people? What is this place?'”

Herron especially appreciated how her shock — and the audience’s — mirrored Loki’s own as the rug gets pulled out from under him. “I was quite excited by it,” she says. “It really shows you that there’s a new power in the MCU — and it’s not what we we spent the last decade dedicating our lives to.”

She told Kevin Feige she wanted gender parity among her crew.

Prior to “Loki,” Herron’s most high profile job was directing the second half of the first season of the Netflix dramedy “Sex Education.” She got the “Loki” job thanks to a 60-page pitch memo that filled out just about every detail of the world of the show. After hiring her, she says Marvel Studios chief Kevin Feige asked her, “What are your terms?”

“This was the first time I was gonna get to hire my heads of department on a television show I worked on,” she says. “I was like, I’d really love [the crew] to be 50/50 across gender.”

Herron says she wasn’t out to fill any jobs on the film with a specific gender. But, she says, “There aren’t enough women in these roles. They’re out there. It’s a lack of opportunity. It’s not a lack of interest.”

She did end up hiring two women for critical roles that are still rarely occupied by women: cinematographer Autumn Durald (“The Sun Is Also a Star”) and composer Natalie Holt (History’s “Knightfall”).

“I felt like she was inside my mind,” Herron says of Durald. “We have the same taste. And I love the way that she talks about light as a character.”

Herron hired Holt unusually early for a composer, after she’d completed editing the first episode during the pandemic shutdown. She knew that the particular sci-fi film noir look of the show that she was developing with Durald needed similarly unique music, and she liked that part of Holt’s pitch was focusing on Loki’s identity as a character.

“Her music then started to inspire how I wanted to shoot other scenes,” Herron says. She’s especially enamored of Holt’s vision for her dynamic and foreboding theme for the TVA.

“She was like, ‘Oh, let’s have that theme be Kang’s’ — well, He Who Remains, I guess, in our show. But I hope that will go on to be Kang’s theme. That was the real fun of it is that you feel like he’s really played a hand now across the whole show, because you realize that music is his music.”

Herron, Durald, and Holt all deliver distinctive and superlative work that’s nothing like the MCU has quite seen before — and nothing quite like anything previously in their careers, either. And that’s entirely the point.

“I think for us, it was about just showing people what we could do and that we could do it at this level,” Herron says.

The episode in which Loki comes out as bisexual was inspired by Alfonso Cuarón and Richard Linklater.

Every episode of “Loki” features multiple extended scenes of two characters just talking to one another, a rarity in a comic book production. Herron says that cutting Episode 1 together during the pandemic lockdown and seeing the scenes between Loki and Mobius (Owen Wilson) play out so well “definitely gave us confidence” to continue that rhythm for the rest of the show.

That was especially true for Episode 3. Written by Bisha K. Ali (who went on to create the upcoming Marvel Studios series “Ms. Marvel”), the episode is essentially an extended meet-cute between Loki and Sylvie as they get to know each other on a planet doomed for total annihilation.

“Bisha’s reference was ‘Before Sunrise’ and ‘Children of Men,'” says Herron. “And it lit my brain on fire. It was kind of weird. It was almost like a bottle episode in the sense that we’re just with the two characters, but obviously, it’s Marvel, right? So they’re bonding in this Apocalypse, which also feels very Loki at the same time.”

That episode is best known for making Marvel Studios history, when Loki casually mentions that he’s had dalliances with both men and women. Herron says that when she first interviewed for the job, she asked if the show was going to acknowledge Loki’s sexuality, which had long been established in the comics as bisexual or pansexual.

“I think everyone wanted to acknowledge it,” she says. “It was just really about giving a care and consideration and doing it in the right way. I think everyone knew it was gonna be quite a big moment. So it was just really about doing it in a way that felt respectful. And honoring it.”

Herron also confirms what many fans had suspected, that she deliberately made the lighting scheme for the scene evoke the blue, purple and red of the bisexual flag. “We knew what we were doing with that scene,” she says with a smile.

She has a lot of ideas for what she’d like to see in Season 2.

Since Herron will be watching Season 2 of “Loki” only “as a fan,” she is also free to wildly speculate as to what she’d most like to see happen — like how, wherever Loki story leads, “we’ve opened the door” for the character to explore his sexuality with men as well as women.

Otherwise? She says she wants to know where Judge Ravonna Renslayer (Gugu Mbatha-Raw) goes to when she leaves the TVA in search, she tells Mobius, of “free will.”

“I love her,” Herron says. “Gugu used to always call her an indoor girl, which made me laugh, but she is. She’s in the office, but she used to be this kick-ass Hunter. So I’m like, Okay, well, where’s her path going?”

Herron is also keen to learn more about Hunter B-15’s backstory — since she deliberately decided to hide it in the scene in Episode 4 when Sylvie shows B-15 her repressed memories as a variant.

“I was like, we shouldn’t see her memories,” Herron says. “It’s a character that thought they had power and realizes they have no power. It felt really powerful to at least give her some power in that scenario. The memories are private. They’re hers.” She pauses. “Also as a fan, I’m like, ‘Oh my God, who is she?!'”

“And obviously, you know, Loki and Sylvie?” Herron continues, on a roll. “He’s in a completely different reality. What’s going to happen to him? How will he get back? Or will he get back? And where’s Sylvie? She’s still in the Citadel? And the multiverse of it all. What the hell is going to happen?!”

Herron chuckles at her own excitement. “So I think there’s so many questions to be answered, and so much more road to travel with all our characters,” she says. “You know, I’m really proud that I got to set up Loki’s story here. But there’s so many different aspects of his identity and personality that’s yet to be explored. I’m excited to see where it goes.”

[hopeshoodie]

what do you think of the independent article about fusebox games??

For those who don’t know, here’s a link to the article (luckily not behind a paywall). 

In summary, we knew that Fusebox laid off all of its writers and a bunch of unity engineers on July 30th. What we didn’t know, is weeks before there was conflict about Seduction Games on matchmaker (which imo is super misogynistic and not even erotic enough to make up for it) being biphobic, and the staff wrote an open letter to management. Then they all... Got fired....

And oh boy I have THOUGHTS on it

Before even reading the article I knew what the homophobic issue the writers were concerned about was. I wrote about it when first playing Seduction Games on matchmaker (lol fuck Matchmaker)- there's a scene where the player dares the love interest to embarrass a man by pretending he's gay and making a scene. And that's just... So gross.

After reading the article I guess it was more that Seduction Games is fetishistic and treating bisexuality as a voyeuristic game for het relationships. And that's valid (but also imo not the worst thing FB has done in the department, see Boah in CMM and how they hide their mlm ships from straight players).

I want so badly to read the internal letter sent by the staff because I'm nosy but also I wish I had their words on the matter specifically. I wonder if they were more frustrated with not having control/input in Matchmaker (understandable, it was the precursor to losing their jobs), being lied to that the offending content would be removed only for it to then be released, or just that Fusebox would let offensive content be put out under their brand name to begin with.

Some other disorganized thoughts

The COO sounds like a real piece of work. I don't remember which article I read awhile ago that made it sound like the leadership (CEO and COO) changed and then Fusebox swiftly pivoted to prioritizing shorter content for an international audience. It sounds like he was a part of that. He has a ton of op eds about how to monetize free-to-play models and generally has Bad Takes. But walking out of a meeting and refusing to hear constructive criticism? What an absolute man baby. But also, doesn't he look the part

a real nathen mazri looking dude.

From a business standpoint, I see why they released Seduction Games despite their writing department vocalizing discontent with it. I've seen this shift on a bunch of other story apps. There's money in romance games that target a 13-22 year old female audience that incorporates softcore porn or questionably sexy content. It's a huge issue on Episode, which is technically a childrens app, but the stories that skirt the boundary of appropriate and not are the ones that get the most reads/gems spent/revenue. If you've played Seduction Games, you know it's exactly that. Written with really bland, simple language so that younger readers are engaged, with juvenile, surface-level romance elements and attempts at erotic writing. The characters aren't unique or interesting (the love interest is a massive creep), but it's optimized to appeal to the most amount of people. If they were planning on firing and outsourcing their writing department anyways, it's a win-win for the executives- put out content that establishes their new direction and communicate to the writing staff that they're not in control.

Fusebox's direct comments to the reporter, that their content is "subjective" and 'based on reality shows' is such an aggravating cop-out. The first is literally gaslighting their writers, saying they're reading too much into someone and it's a matter of perspective instead of just... something that they did. Like that story just IS sexist and biphobic, no wiggle room there. The second is just 'other people make bad content so we can too', which... oof. I see why the writers were mad enough to risk their jobs.

I've just got to wonder what's the financial benefit to not releasing S4. Like I totally get that they're shutting down the main LITG game to focus on Matchmaker which makes more money, but at this point we KNOW they have the S4 art assets because we've seen then in promos. They must have some if not most of the writing done, because this all went down close to the scheduled release of S4. Since Fusebox has been clear they're just money grabbing with no integrity for their story or their writers' intentions, why not just release S4? You're not going to /lose/ money- if there are art assets incomplete they can just reuse past assets or cut out scenes. It seems like it'd make financial sense to wring the last bit of gems/interest out of the LITG fandom that won't transition to matchmaker, then full pivot to matchmaker.

IDK anything about Britain's workplace protection laws (in the US it's at-will employment so retaliatory firing is a-okay as long as it's not on protected actions) but maybe in the UK it's not? Like you can't argue this is discriminatory, but it could be argued that the firing was a retaliation for the employees complaining to HR about inappropriate behavior, which is a protected action. But then again you could say that more than just the people who complained got fired so it's a moot point.

tl;dr it doesn't surprise me that Fusebox openly disrespected and antagonized their writers before the mass layoff, but it's super disappointing.

All the more reason I encourage yall to leave poor reviews on LITG/matchmaker, uninstall the games, and not give FB a penny more.

[anestheticrage]

Be me: Japanese honor student🎓, 15, with half a brain and even less of a plan. Hunting bitches by day and witches by night. Livin that dank only child✌️ life while mom n dad yeet all over the globe, leavin me plenty of time to forget not to make 2 lunches for myself #quirky 😜

no time for socialization or basic electronics skills ???📱??? when your best friends are an alien demon rabbit🐰👽 and the inexplicable Hole ™ in your brain. lmao, btw did i mention im ✨M✨A✨G✨I✨C✨A✨L✨

dreamin bout my 2D waifus again when familiar pink haired cancer patient dances through my brain passin out fliers: Kamihama Meguca Dating Service: Sponsored by Cult of the Magius. 250 stones per session 🤔

seems legit, Mr. Moneybags. wasn't spending my unwieldy sack of gemstones on anything else anyway. lets pull 💎💎💎

first up we have Redhead Radagast and her plethora of plants. 🌿☺️🦎

anndd, nearly dies immediately. 

well not off to a great start but i guess shes pretty cute at lea- oh FUCK its her girlfriend, Tsundere Poseidon😒🔱💦, and their exasperated, straight and single Sword Mom 😔🗡️🔥. fml gonna have to save up for the next pull. might as well play a few rounds with what i got tho. 

get in some good girl talk about things like school, color coded hair styles, body count, permanent soul damage, and our personal demon pacts. ya know, the usual 😚 . realize my dark backstory seems to be missing, so the girls take me to Ketchup Queen Sappho 🍅🥧 (wtf?) to molest my glowy egg stone. whatevs, more action than ive had since Kuroe 🖤 got added to the story anyway

the gang agrees it's time to hunt down the cutest rabbit pimp 🕶️🐇💵 in the city. >> say 🎵mukyuuu🎵 one more time and ill hug you so hard my backstory will pop right out, you adorable fluffy bastard. plz be my new best friend 💕

Form brand new friendship pact with Kyubae, and remember that my lil Sis 🐥 was always the best wingman for pickin up magic chicks, and kept her side of the room so spotless i forgot she existed. whoops 乁༼☯‿☯✿༽ㄏ Maybe if I find her i can stop paying these exorbitant pull fees.📵💎

speaking of which: hot damn this week's featured bachelorette is a 19 year old model and magical detective🔎 with massive levels of PTSD and self loathing 🥵💙💦 more likely to stab you or dramatically jump off a rooftoop than utter a single positive comment. wow, maybe i really COULD find true love…

... if i had MORE THAN A 1% FUCKING DRAW CHANCE. 😡 smh

hard to make much progress finding sis or winning the broken heart of a hard boiled detective amidst the never ending lover's quarrel of the Trident Vine Lesbians. 💔 Sword Mom tells them if they don't behave a monster will take them away. LOL classic mom 🤣

>>>HOLY FUCK IT DID

declare all-out war on urban legends, starting with staircases ⚔️ to reunite the dysfunctional trio, and hope that I net a way better lineup with the next 10x pull. at least sad sleuth lady came to help out. they say combat is the best way to bond wi-   and there she goes off the rooftop again 🙄 fml

alright that got way off track, we need a fresh start, away from all the loli drama. how bout a little B&E🔓🔨🤷🏻‍♀️ at the local house of worship to clear my head. ahh nothing like the unanswered prayers of the masses to get you in the mood for another wasted pull, and the 🔥 MIGHTIEST 🔥 headache you could ask for with a side of Double Cooked Pork 🐖🍜 (meh 5/10🧾)

venture forth into the spiritual unknown with your new human flamethrower🔥🌻🧡 and ask your favorite private eye to please, for the love of Eve, trade Meguca accounts with me~~~ Head through the eastern spirit portal to meet up with hologram propaganda sis and detective crush's evil ex, who joined a dating-app cult (#fuck) and also turned into the moon?🌕?(that's rough buddy)

get ambushed by Acid Horse on Wheels 🌈🐴 and vomit up my soul so hard that its time for a crossover episode. T U R F F F   W A R R R *que operatic harmonies* 💛 Blondie with the hair drills and enough attitude and guns to fill up a noble phantasm tries to ban my account permanently, but PI heartthrob denies her admin privileges. aww babe i didn't know you cared. 😭♥️

get kidnapped by my new true love and go back to her place 😏  defs enough empty rooms to house five emotionally traumatized girls and at least two ghosts hehehe👻 XD 💚🃏💜🎸 decide to form the anti-gossip brigade and recruit my blazing sunflower after getting ambushed by the witch living in my fruit loops🥣

❌outvoted 2:1 that cults are bad. mf. fiinneee one last pull to round out the team and then I'll delete the app. cmonnn Karin 🎃~

OH HELL YEAH TWO FOR ONE.

Always wanted a daughter 💜🔨🐄 with a penchant for pissing off the local Martial Arts & Books Club and drinking suspicious liquids offered by total strangers. Well if it's good enough for her AND the sexy mayadere with enough game to seduce a mermaid, might as well get in on that myself. 

#curseddrank 🤢 0/24 would not recommend to a friend, 'cept maybe Ria

win alot of cash 🤑, blow up a fountain, meet the pied piper²🎶🖕, moon cult, monochrome feathers, something about liberation✊🏻; adopt temper tantrum cow girl. aces 💜🥩

Next up!!! skydiving with DJ Hammer! Jump to apparently-not-certain death after suicidal A.I. 💚💾🗼 tells you to rescue her hostage before they run out of Radiohead albums and have to move on to Thom Yorke's solo discography. save the invisible shield kitten 💚👑😿 from happiness and get chased through the internet by the sexiest homicidal Paint Pallette 💚🎨😈 since Caravaggio. (apparently green is the color of the digital apocalypse. i’m deleting Kako from my friend's list)

that’s it, fuck this app. 250 stones 💎 per-life-threatening-experience is more than i’m willing to deal with 😓 don’t wanna mess with the perfect nuclear family anyway. we've already got: 

✔️the two emotionally traumatized moms with memory and commitment issues

✔️the adhd daughter with anger management problems and a giant hammer

✔️the psychologically abused scizophrenic cat

✔️and the eccentric aunt with crippling anxiety

#squadgoals

now that were done hoarding bitches, its time to hunt the witches. and the bitches makin the witches. btw did i mention the witches ARE the bitches! AND WERE ALL GOING TO DIE!? 📽️⁉️💀 wait fuck lets back up a second

This is Nemo📕 and Token🧪 and they have all the answers but prefer if you only ask vague questions in exchange for vague responses so they can fill in the rest by discussing their superior intellect 🧠 at length. not to mention they built that dating app, so of course everyone in my harem decides to be a FUCKING. TRAITOR.🤬

cept waifu prime ofc 🥰💙. [PTSD > brainwashing] 'yOu CaN bE tHe LeAdEr NoW'. i have been from the very beginning you traumatized Hinedere nightmare. maybe if you weren't so caught up collecting surrogate daughters you would've noticed IM👏THE👏ONLY👏 ONE👏PROGRESSING👏THE FUCKING👏PLOT✨

rescue the rest of dysfunctional found-family™ from selves before my adorable firebender burns down Disnihama🎡🔥😱 during her weekly anxiety attack. (love the makeover T B H) 

CHAPTER 8: Magical Girl Massacre🩸🗡️

   - everyone has like, the shittiest day ever

   - the new Pope really needs to be extradited from the church

   - make friends with a really pretty tree 🌺🌲✨

i swear, if i don't finish this god damn story in time to get that free pull im gonna beat the shit out of every mirror i find in that giant mansion that i haven't even had any time to even mention yet. 🖕🏚️ let alone EVERYTHING happening with the prequel [fuck you, I'm the star] girls 💗💜💙💛❤️️ and their multidimensional melodrama. We don't need that many repetitive af episodes to emphasize that Homo-ra is a shitty person. we've all seen Rebellion. 🙄

NO, I DONT CARE IF YOU WANT SAPPHO'S BACKSTORY, I ONLY HAVE 79 STONES LEFT AND IF YACHAN FINDS OUT I HAVEN'T DELETED THE APP YET IM GONNA HAVE TO GO SLEEP IN WITH SANA 😭💎💸😠

uhhhggggg where were we… Topple a cult and burn down Hotel Denoument only to realize that Sis was fused with the dating app servers this entire madokafuckin time (told ya she was the best wingman 😊). 

Dilemma: Sis =🥚, Triumvirate of Trouble want 🐣. What do? vote now:

Help Hatch - IIIIIII

Not Do That - IIIII

What The Actual Fuck Is Going On - IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Lets just fight everyone until something good happens.

🔥🔫🔥🗡️🔥😱🔥🌆🔥😱🔥🛡️🔥💣🔥

Kill (???) the artist-in-chief of the italian reindeer murder police after teaching her the true meaning of Christmas 🎄 hatch 🐣lil Sis and realize she WAS your wingman all along🐰 MUKYUUUU! we're just gonna ignore how much trouble it would have saved if you'd just mentioned that. "yOu DiDnT aSk..." 

FUCK YOU SPACE BITCH. ONCE AN INCUBATOR ALWAYS AN INCUBATOR 🖕🐇🔪

anywho, somewhere along the lines we of course summoned the Antichrist ⚙️ because why not raise the stakes to max and still not kill off a single character. Madofuckinkami, can we PLEASE wrap this up. 😩💤

feathers (not the culty kind, tfm) rain from the sky, and the power of friendship and not having the Urobutcher 🔪🩸as a lead writer saves our peacefully sectioned off alternate reality 😇

TL:DR fuck cults, real life waifus DO exist, don't sell your soul to space rabbits, or your stones to megacorporations. Enjoy arc 2 on the JP server with your shitty translation patch you filthy fuckin weebs 

Yours Truly, 

- Thirsty Weeb Eroha 💗💎😘 

[starkerforlife6969]

Starker- Anger

very loosely based on Billy Hargrove/Steve Harrington from Stranger things. 

TW: Please be careful! Explicit abuse, parental abuse (tony’s dad, Peter’s step dad), violence, Tony punches Peter in the face once, both peter and tony are being abused by their parents, unhealthy coping mechanisms, brief mentions of homophobic slurs, somehow a happy ending, high school au, just- be careful, my lovelies! 

Tony’s known pretty boys like Peter Parker his whole life.

They aren’t worth the paper they’re printed on, and they are printed on paper: stick thin and flimsy. Two dimensional, boring, shallow, materialistic. They’re a dime a dozen back in Phoenix, and frankly, Tony wasn’t impressed with them there, so here, in this dreary little town where school spirit and pep leaks outside of the school’s hallways and into the streets, where popularity matters deep in the suburbs the same way it does in the classroom, Tony really isn’t impressed.

Pretty boys like Peter Parker are pretty, and that’s all they’re good for. A bit of eye-candy.

The bubbly-blonde, cotton-candy cheerleader who’s been assigned to showing him around the school, does so with an enthusiasm that’s borderline revolting. “There are loads of school clubs, you should totally join, like, all of them! Peter’s on the committee, and he’s so open to new ideas, if you think of a club just run it by him! He’d be so happy to! He also hosts these, like, killer parties! And it’s always open invitation, Peter’s house is totally lush, he has this huge pool and his parents are like, never home-“

Jesus Christ, it’s all so inane. Tony reaches for his cigarettes and the girl stutters to a halt as she watches him light it up right there in the hall. Her eyes are wide with awe- rimmed with arousal and wrongness. Tony resists the urge to smirk. It’s all so easy. Cookie-cutter town like this, where the most popular guy in school is on fuckin’ committees for school clubs, he’s not surprised that dark, slicked back hair, black-rimmed eyes and a cigarette will be enough to rework the social structure.

In fact, he’s sort of banking on it.

“Y-you’re not allowed to smoke in here,” she breathes in amazement, and Tony chuckles, fumes curling around his jaw.

“Yeah, sweetheart?” He says around his cigarette, giving her a wink. “You gonna tell on me?”

She shakes her head, hair swishing with her promise, and when the tour ends- she races off, no doubt, to tell the food chain of the cafeteria what she’s witnessed.

* *

Maria cries that night, when Howard kicks Tony’s face so hard he can feel his eye bulge a little.

Tony wants to tell her not to cry. He wants to gather her into his arms and spit blood and say I told you he wouldn’t change just because we’ve moved states. He can’t change, mom. He won’t change.

He loves her for loving him. He hates her for not saving him.

He swallows down putrid blood and sleeps in his car.

When he wakes up, there’s fresh bandages tucked into his glove compartment, a packed lunch, a blanket draped over his shoulders and a post-it note that says (in handwriting that trembles) that maybe he shouldn’t come inside for breakfast. I love you, sweetheart. I’m sorry. Mom xx

* *

The rumour mill has been churning, and when he walks into school with his shiner, it just spins even faster.

People gape, a few, braver ones, flutter over, hovering, but not quite speaking.

Tony feels pretty damn good. It’s nice to feel handsome. Powerful. Nice to know that somewhere, he can exude a little control.

But to be King, there has to be a de-throning.

“You,” he drawls, slamming a locker shut and narrowly missing a freshman’s fingers. “Peter Parker, where is he?”

The freshmen swallows hard, shrinking into his neck. “Uh-uh- p-probably in the a-art rooms, T-Tony.”

Tony grins, and pats him on the cheek. The boy already knows his name. Everyone must.

Without another word, he turns and heads for the art rooms.

When he gets there, his breath catches in his throat.

Dappled in sunlight, twisting spirals of cedar hair, amber eyes and practically drenched in a golden aura, is Peter Parker.

He’s frowning at a canvas, and it makes Tony seethe.

Pretty boys like that are all the same. Oh, is his biggest fucking problem the fact he can’t decide what to paint? He certainly doesn’t have any money issues, not if the expensive shoes are anything to go by. The designer jeans, the pink sweater with the ruffled lace collar.

Tony hates him. Fucking envies him. The sight of him- so beautiful, so serene- so troubleless, he has everything. He has everything. No doubt two parents who adore him, a nice house, money, talent, beauty- a future. And everyone here adores him, fuckin’ thinks he hung the moon in the sky.

“You think you’re worth anything?” Howard sneers, jabbing Tony’s shoulders hard enough to bruise. “You ain’t worth a damn thing, sport. You’re worth shit.”

“Well,” Tony smiles, all mean and sharp at the edges, and feels a vicious sort of victory in the way Peter jumps.

Like he’s not used to be snuck up on. Like he’s not used to being scared. “Oh, you scared me,” the boy laughs, a blush on his cheeks, “you must be Tony-“

“You’re as pretty as they said you were.” Tony continues, because he doesn’t want to hear Peter’s sweet voice. Doesn’t want to hear another word out of his mouth. “Prettier, even. They don’t do you justice.” He trails his fingers across still-wet canvases drying on easels, smudging and ruining the paintings.

“Hey, I think- you’re not supposed to touch those,” Peter points out worriedly, pearly teeth nibbling at his bottom lip. “You might accidentally-“

Tony moves so quickly it must look like he’s teleported. He backhands Peter so fucking hard, it’s so fucking satisfying, and the boy topples to the ground gracelessly.

There’s no movement for a long moment, before the boy lets out a strangled gasp, wrenches himself away.

Not far enough. Goddamn, he’s so weak. How can anyone be this weak? Tony knows to cover his head, to curl up in a ball, but Peter’s splayed out and defenceless.

Tony reaches down to grab him by the designer sweater, lifting him clear off the ground as Peter winces and recoils. The mark on his cheek is darkening rapidly, an ugly scarlet. “You run this school, Parker? You their precious king?”

“What? No! I…” there are tears sparkling in his eyes, he even cries like a Disney character. “I don’t- I don’t understand, please don’t-“

Begging never stops anything. Tony drops him and punches down in one swift motion, right onto Peter’s stomach- forcing all the air out of him, along with a pitiful whimper. “You ain’t king of shit, you get that, Parker?”

He doesn’t stick around for an answer, not that Peter could give one, with the way he’s wheezing, and he strides out; fingers streaked with paint and blood.

* * Peter doesn’t come into school the next day, and all eyes are stuck on Tony.

They’re not all as admiring anymore, but they are intimidated, and that’ll do. The girls still flock to him, the younger students still flee.

It’s easy to dethrone. History makes it look hard, but it isn’t.

“Liam’s throwing a party next week,” Cindy says over lunch. Tony’s sitting at the “popular” table. It looks like all the others, but the people there are substantially more attractive. He’s sitting where Peter usually sits, that much he can gather, and the students (his subjects) whisper with nervous fear. “You should totally come.”

“Maybe,” Tony murmurs, but he will go. Anywhere that isn’t home in the evenings. Anywhere else.

*** Tony feels good on Friday.

His dad is out of town on business, and he and his mom ate take out in front of the tv and didn’t have to worry when they spilt some on the rug.

He parks his beat up car in one of the teacher’s spots, and his entourage rush to greet him and update him on the gossip and prattle on about things he doesn’t give a shit about.

That is, until one of them says-

“Peter’s back in today.”

And that, Tony has to see.

He’s not technically in AP english, but he winks at the receptionist and she buckles like everyone does.

Peter sits at the front of the class, scribbling notes furiously, and looks entirely put together in a white chiffon blouse and green slacks. The bruise along his cheekbone is horrific. Darker and splotchier- there’s a tiny little cut above his left eyebrow- Tony doesn’t remember doing that, but that happens sometimes. He hits a little harder than he means to.

Seeing it is a weird feeling. It makes disgust well up inside him, something horrible and tortured screeches to be let out, and on the other hand-

He’s a king looking down on the enemy wounded.

Peter doesn’t look up at him once during the class, even though he goes out of his way to be annoying and aggravating.

The teacher kicks him out eventually, and when the bell rings, he waits by Peter’s locker.

The boy approaches cautiously. He’s alone. All alone. High school fans, so fickle, Tony tuts.

“Parker,” he grins, watching as Peter twists open the combination lock. “Finally decided to come back.”

“I guess so,” the boy says quietly, demurely, changing out his books. He has hard copies of everything, all brand new and shiny. They don’t look like the torn up, hand-down charity shop copies Tony uses.

Tony waits, but Peter offers nothing else. He feels too sharp around the edges, he feels like he’s shattering. “Well? Aren’t you gonna tell on me or some shit? I haven’t heard a word.”

“You want me to tell someone you attacked me?” Peter clarifies curiously, looking at him with huge, honey eyes. It’s like someone bottled sunlight. Tony’s winded by the sight of them.

“I-“

“What would that achieve?” Peter asks, blatant with honesty and genuine inquisitiveness. “It wouldn’t make you stop. It might get you suspended, maybe expelled, but then what? Not like you couldn’t come and find me outside of school. Then I call the police? Try to get you arrested for assault? You’d be released in a year anyway, and then what?”

Tony snarls, banging his fist against the lockers so loudly the entire hallway falls silent. He leans in and spits into Peter’s face: “How about some fuckin’ gratitude that I didn’t leave a mark, huh, pretty boy? Where’s my thanks?”

Peter doesn’t step away. He looks up and juts out his chin in a way that’s meant to be intimidating but is more endearing than anything. “Thank you.” He whispers. His lower lip shakes. “Thank you for what you did to me.”

“Don’t fuckin- stop cryin- get up! Get up!” Howard yells, hauling Tony to his feet. He stumbles, unable to stand, and Howard shoves him against the wall. “Fuckin’ ingrate, say thank you- thank me for taking the time to fuckin’ teach you!”

“Thank you,” Tony manages around a sob, sliding to the floor and bursting into tears.

Tony staggers back hard.

He’s not-

He’s not.

*** Pretty boy Peter is a bug under his skin.

Tony can’t stop thinking about him. Can’t stop wondering where he is, how he is.

Jefferson High is a huge school, but the fields and playgrounds are bigger, and that’s where students spend their time.

Tony finds Peter every lunch time, curled up in the big chairs in the library, buried in a book.

Sometimes he’s wearing oversized cream sweaters, sometimes when it’s hot, he’s in some fancy lace get up, and Tony eyes the smooth, soft skin on display. Sometimes he’s almost asleep, looks so peaceful and cosy (Tony wants to reach out and gently, gently touch) sometimes his eyes are moving so rapidly, his lips parted in exhilaration, fingers clumsy as they hurriedly turn the page that Tony would give anything to know what he was reading.

For Peter to tell him what interested him so much.

As it is, he doesn’t approach. Just watches from the shadows for as long as he can, before slipping out undetected.

He’s particularly good at that, thank years of practising.

The swarms that once worshipped the boy never hang out with Peter anymore, but oddly enough, Peter doesn’t seem to care, or even notice.

Tony can relate to that. Losing Cindy the air-head might actually be a relief. He’s tried to shake her off, but she latches like a leech.

Instead, Peter spends his time with a dreary-eyed girl. A girl Tony knows gets called dyke by the guys in the shower-room.

Tony doesn’t join in their bantering over jokes like that.

She’s cool, though, and clearly doesn’t give a shit. She’ll be something big when she’s out of here, and Tony wants to her see her succeed. Wants to flip on his television set one day in a few years and see her face.

When he gets home that night, he has the book Peter was reading at lunch tucked under his arm (the librarian too, is a sucker for his eyes).

Howard glares at him, kicks at him when he walks past like he’s a mangy mutt, but he makes it to bed and he flips on the switch, snuggled into threadbare sheets, and he reads.

*** Amidst the thrum of music, the boozy smell of alcohol, and lipstick on the back of playing cards, Peter Parker shows up to Liam’s party.

Tony’s halfway through a keg, but he’s not feeling the effects (so what? He’s built up a bit of a tolerance) and people are chanting King Tony! when he spots wavy brown hair and pretty pink lips.

He follows without even meaning to.

Peter’s face is healed now, back to as beautiful as ever. Tony heals fast too.

“Parker,” he greets, when Peter helps himself to punch. “You showin’ your face here?”

Peter smiles. “I was invited.”

That surprises him. “Really? Who’d wanna be seen with a nobody like you?”

“Liam and I go back.”

Well damn, not as fickle as he’d thought then. Anyway, the sight of Peter is thrilling. It’s troubling. “Get the fuck out,” Tony orders, because a rather large part of him wants to- wants to kiss-

“I was just leaving.” The boy corrects, turning away.

There’s a welt on his back.

It peaks out behind the strappy, vintage style blazer. But only just. It’s been cleverly covered up, if Tony wasn’t so familiar with the sight he’d never have spotted it and-

He reaches out, calls for Peter to stop- wait-

But he’s already gone.

*

It’s an obsession.

But it keeps him from the house. He drives around town slowly, cigarette hanging out the corner of his mouth, arm hanging out the window of his car, and he coasts through fancy neighbourhoods, sees wholesome families praying before eating their dinner in their grand dining rooms.

He hates them.

He spots Peter’s pretty red Camaro parked in the driveway of an enormous house.

He parks around the block, comes back, and lingers.

It’s totally normal. The curtains are shut, but Tony can see enough. They have neat hedgerows, cultivated fox gloves, and a bird feeder out front. There are three cars parked neatly, Peter’s, a blue beetle, and a large jeep, all lovingly taken care of and gleaming in the evening light.

The kitchen curtains have charming little frogs on them, the mat out front says welcome.

He can’t have seen a welt on Peter’s back, because that doesn’t fit.

It fits Tony. With his beaten down house, lack of kitchen curtains, lack of prayers, his scratched up, junkyard piece of crap, his bruised knuckles and his split lip.

He’s wrong.

*** His mom’s been saying that Howard’s getting worse.

Tony zones her out. She says stuff like this all the time. Other times she says he’s getting better, then he’s getting worse, but she never does a fuckin’ thing about it.

When he staggers out of the house at three am, bleeding bad, throbbing all over, and he falls into his car- can hear his mother screaming, can hear Howard demanding him to get back inside, he steps on the gas and tails it.

He’s driving to the hospital, hardly able to see through the blood and the pain and the black spots dancing across his vision, when he crashes into a street lamp.

It’s not a bad crash. Another dent in many, he thinks, but he suddenly feels warm all over.

He’s cosy. He could fall asleep.

*** When he wakes up, he’s on a cloud. He’s floating on air.

He blinks and there’s a warm, gold light, and two, beautiful honey eyes.

He’s in heaven.

But that can’t be right, he’s a piece of shit.

“You got that right,” comes a chiding, slightly teasing tone, and he squints against the dimness to see Peter Parker above him, dabbing at him with white cotton buds.

Feeling seems to come back all at once. First, an ache that drags through his whole body, then the blinding sting of whatever hell fire Peter’s putting on his face, third, that Peter’s straddling hm, and it’s a really rather nice hot, weight.

“Mm, baby,” he groans, sliding his coarse hands up Peter’s bare, smooth thighs, “this is a pleasant surprise.” He bucks his hip a little, feels his clothed dick nestle between two plump cheeks. He gets a little burst of pleasure that’s such a fucking relief from the pain that he grinds upwards again.

Peter’s hand is firm on his chest, pressing him down into the bed, not cloud. “You’re hurt, Tony. One problem at a time please.”

Problems. Damn. He has a lot of those.

“Tell me about it,” Peter sighs. “I’ve parked your car at the drive-thru theatre. I left a note at the lamppost. I hope no one minds.”

Tony blinks, dazed, and watches as Peter tends to him. It reminds him of that film his mom used to watch all the time, the fuckin horrible one with the dancing and the singing and the monster.

Beauty and the Beast, his mind supplies.

Peter’s face isn’t pretty. It’s beautiful. Dimples and prominent cheekbones, lovely eyebrows and long lashes. He has freckles and a beauty mark on his jaw, perfect for kissing. His forehead is creased in concentration as he works on Tony’s face, his tongue resting on his lips.

Tony may not be in heaven, but he is looking at an angel.

“Do you really…” he whispers, reaching up a clumsy hand to stroke tenderly at Peter’s face. The boy doesn’t even flinch. “Did you really have a…a belt mark on you…”

Those eyes snap to him, a vulnerability come to light, a hidden truth revealed.

Then they darken, and look away. “You need to get your rest.”

“It doesn’t make sense,” Tony croaks, eyes burning, “you’re perfect. It’s not meant to- not meant to happen to perfect people, only- only broken ones, like-“

“Nobody’s perfect,” Peter whispers wisely, dabbing cream onto his fingers, and then onto Tony’s face.

“Who does it to you?”

“Step dad,” Peter shrugs, “he never hits her, though. I think he misses his own son.”

“I’ll kill him for hurtin’ you, I swear,” he slurs, filled with righteous ire. Who could hurt such an angel-

“That’d be hypocritical.” Peter muses, opening a pack of antiseptic wipes and swiping at Tony’s temple. He’s good at this. He must be well-practised.

Tony drowns in self-loathing. “I’m a shit.” He hisses, “I’m a shit, I’m sorry, but my dad-“

“I understand.” Peter nods, fingers stroking through Tony’s hair. “I empathise. I don’t forgive you. Not yet.”

“You might, though?” Tony urges, craning into every touch. “Maybe?”

Peter grinds down once, making Tony’s dick jolt with arousal. “Maybe.” He whispers.

*** Tony hates his anger management counsellor so fucking much.

But Howard hates him going, so Tony always shows up on time.

Peggy is patient and understanding, but no-nonsense.

When he shows up with bleeding knuckles and a jagged cut on his arm, she offers him a lemon sucker and shakes her head.

“He started it.” Tony hisses, taking a sherbet and sucking on it.

She doesn’t say anything.

“It wasn’t Peter, if that’s what you’re thinking. I would never hurt Pe- I haven’t ever hit Peter again.”

She’s silent.

He feels like a kid. He hangs his head on his chest. “I get so angry.” He whispers.

“And does violence make the anger go away?”

He nods, looking at her through tears. He cries so much nowadays. Peggy says it’s a good thing. “It turns it into power.”

Peggy looks at him, urging him to get there on his own.

“It’s not power,” he mumbles, lemon on his tongue, “I feel helpless.”

“We all do sometimes, Tony,” she smiles, and offers him another lemon drop. “I want to talk about your mom today. About the things you think she likes best about you.”

Tony wants to run and hide, but instead he sits and listens.

* Sometimes, when Peter reaches over to hold Tony’s hand, Tony yanks it away, his whole mood sours, and he storms out.

He always comes back though. Shame-faced, small, and he reaches out for a hug and Peter gives it to him.

He yells sometimes too. When he’s trying really hard not to, it slips out. Horrible things, things he doesn’t mean, things he wishes he could take back but he fears are going to hang there in the air forever.

He always cries afterwards, and calls Peggy.

Peter yells too, from time to time, when he’s fracturing a little, when Kurt presses where it hurts.

Tony holds Peter tight when that happens, kisses his hair all soft and gentle in the ways he never thought he could be, and promises that they’ll both do better. They’ll both be better.

Peter sees Stephen Strange, a counsellor on the other side of town.

Peggy thinks it’s a good idea for Peter and Tony to heal independently of each other, just in case they become a support system for one being, rather than two people.

Strange says you shouldn’t feel guilty for lashing out. Peggy says you should apologise if you’re sorry.

Peter kisses the hollow of Tony’s throat and says: “I want to tell you all the things I love about you.”

By the end of the forty-minute list, Tony has to cut Peter off, because he can’t hear him over his own sobs.

After a month of no violence, Tony’s greeted to Peter covered in flour and icing, holding a poorly shaped cake that says one month of peace is groovy baby.

They eat it in an old tent, camped out on the edge of town. The cake is disgusting, and Tony’s new favourite. 

They have sex in the grass and Tony kisses Peter’s new welt, and says that he deserves so much more than this.

That, if he likes, Tony will try to give it to him.

**

They have a modest house in a modest town. They have curtains with kangaroos on them, and no dining table- just a coffee table with bean bags in front of the television.

They have one nice car that they share.

They have friends.

They meet each other in the drive way, both on their way home from work, and Peter blushes when Tony holds out the bouquet of tulips. “Pretty boy,” Tony grins, as Peter buries his face in the petals. “I heard from a little birdie that it was your wedding anniversary.”

“Mm,” Peter giggles, “that’s weird. Me and my husband promised each other no presents.”

“Ah,” Tony sighs, drawing Peter into his arms, kissing him silly for the whole neighbourhood to see (not that they haven’t seen it before. It’s stupid and reckless but it’s a good town). “So, if we go inside, there’ll be no freshly baked cake on the counter, right? You didn’t sneak home on your lunch break to bake me something?”

Peter sighs. “Who told?”

“Becky. She can’t keep a secret, Pete.”

Peter laughs, and they thread their fingers together and head inside.

It’s not a perfect ending, but it’s happy. They fight, sometimes. They tremble. They remember things they wish they could forget. They break down on the side of the road. They spend nights in motels.

But those are fewer and farther between. And in the end, they always come home- to each other.

The cake is terrible. It always is. But Tony eats every single bite.

It’s the same recipe as the one Peter made all those years ago, after one month of no fights.

It’s stale and it brings back so many memories.

“Is it good?” Peter asks worriedly, putting the tulips in water.

Tony takes a huge bite, and shakes his head in wonder. “Yeah, baby,” he whispers, “even after all this time, it’s still really, really good.”

He thinks it always will be. 

[ranma-rewatch]

Episode 12: A Woman's Love is War! The Martial Arts Rhythmic Gymnastics Challenge!

AAAAAhhhhh! After 10,000 years, I’m free! Time to watch more Ranma 1/2! We’re getting ready for the middle part of what I guess you could call the Kodachi introduction arc, and like I intimated last time, she’s not exactly my favorite character. That said, I am interested to see how this can play out over the course of two episodes, so next paragraph I’ll have watched the episode.

Uh, so, I don’t think an episode has surprised me by being this much better than I was expecting so far in this rewatch. Like I said before, low expectations, but I really enjoyed this one. The episode starts with Akane and Ranma heading to school on the day before the marital arts match, only for Kodachi to show up and attack Akane.

This has nothing to do with the match, though. She literally just came by to see Ranma, who she has fallen completely in love with, but decided to attack Akane on-sight because why not. After Akane literally throws her at Ranma, he is suddenly confronted by our old friend Tatewaki Kuno, who is surprised to hear of Kodachi’s affection for this rapscallion. After a few seconds of thought, he makes it clear Ranma has his permission to date her, but when Ranma snaps about now being asked about this, Kodachi gets sad, feeling like maybe Ranma hates her.

Trying to avoid her wrath, Ranma runs and hides behind Akane, pointing out that he is her fiance, which would put a hamper on dating. When Akane confirms this, new stakes are given to their upcoming fight: if Kodachi wins, she gets Ranma. Kuno is totally down with that, since with Ranma out of the way, he sees himself easily winning Akane’s (and Ranma’s) affection.

It’s as Kodachi runs off, laughing, that Kuno finally reveals why he jumped into this conversation in the first place: Kodachi is his little sister. He’s aware that she has quite a few terrible qualities, and so warns Akane that she is likely to cheat quite a bit before and during their fight. As he walks away, Ranma and Akane reel from this family revelation, and Ranma notes that he can actually see the resemblance now.

From there, we cut to Akane practicing that night in the dojo with Ranma. She’s clearly gotten a lot better, though makes it clear the new stakes have nothing to do with why she wants to win so badly. Just as Akane notes that she hasn’t had Ryoga’s assistance in training for the last few days, or seen P-chan, the piglet runs into the room, carrying evidence that he’d been in Hiroshima and Kyoto. (Fun fact: my best friend went to Hiroshima while she was studying abroad there!)

There’s some banter over Ryoga’s reappearance, but then Akane trips on a tool, injuring her ankle in the process. It’s bad enough that Kasumi makes clear there’s no way she can play in the match, which means they need a substitute to avoid giving up. They consider that they’d need to find someone with great marital arts skills, who is really acrobatic, and looks like a girl. All eyes go to Ranma just as Ryoga enters the room, having once again used Soun Tendo’s hot bath to change back to human, and throws cold water on Ranma.

He offers to train Ranma through the night, though it’s clear quickly that Ranma’s general skills do transfer pretty well. The only big hurdle is that in Rhythmic Gymnastics Martial Arts, the fighters aren’t allowed to deal direct blows, only use their themed weapons to fight. Akane observes at first, but they both tell her to go and get some sleep, which she ends up agreeing to. Once she’s gone, Ryoga gets serious in fighting, and reveals why he’s really doing this: he wants Ranma to lose. If he does, Ranma has to date Kodachi, which leaves Akane open to date him. He’s not trying to spar with Ranma, he’s trying to injure him bad enough that he can’t fight.

Akane wakes up the next morning and quickly hears the fight is still going on, heading into the dojo to find they’re going at it, though they’re both clearly exhausted. Oh, and the dojo is wrecked. Ranma is delirious from lack of sleep, and almost falls for a thumb tack in the hand trap from Kodachi when they go to the match at her school. Meanwhile, Ryoga is amazed to find that he’s managed to get from Akane’s house to the school without getting lost, and chalks the miracle up to the power of love. There’s another trick from Kodachi in the dressing room, and Ryoga is hit by random cold water while trying to get to the gymnasium, leading to Kodachi kidnapping him for some scheme.

Soon, it’s time for the match to begin, and Kuno is watching in the stands, ready to root for his sister for what he admits is the first time ever. Kodachi descends from the ceiling in a wedding dress while having rockets fired at her new opponent, all very on-brand for her. Ranma is asked what his name is, and he just gives them his real name, to Akane’s confusion. The Kuno’s both just take this as Ranma somehow having the exact same name as, well, Ranma, and some of their classmates in the crowd notice that they do look alike, pondering on how they’re connected.

The fight goes to start, but Kodachi begins by dazing Ranma with a twirly ribbon and an onslaught of black roses, then uses that opening to attach a chain to Ranma’s wrist. On the other end of that chain is P-chan, which Kodachi thinks will ensure she ends the match. But we don’t get to see that yet, because that’s for next episode!

So, a lot of thoughts, actually. First things first, I feel like this is the first episode of the series so far that’s really gone whole-hog into what a lot of people think of as the series’ main premise. For this whole set-up, Kodachi loves uncursed Ranma but hates Akane and cursed Ranma, Kuno loves cursed Ranma and Akane but hates uncursed Ranma, and Ryoga loves Akane and hates Ranma whether he’s cursed or not. This creates a network of alliances that all work against Ranma and Akane’s wishes. He doesn’t want to date Kodachi and Akane wants to get a victory for her school after Kodachi unfairly beat up the actual gymnastics team.

It all feels very farcical, in a good way. Throughout this rewatch, there have been times when the humor doesn’t really land for me, usually because it just gets too silly for me, if that makes any sense. But this worked perfectly, it was all very character driven while also being deeply ridiculous. Things like Kuno having the sense of mind to see that his sister is a weird one while not being cognizant of his own strangeness kind of brought it to earth in a way, and it was all just a good time.

I also quite enjoyed a lot of the animation, the changes to character designs, and the general dynamics on display. There was something weirdly smooth to how Ryoga entered Akane’s room and put his arm around Ranma’s shoulder that just felt cool to watch. The facial expressions in that scene, and throughout, were also in top form. The way he goes from clearly coming in with an ulterior motive, to revealing what he’s really up to, it all felt a little more devious than we get from Ryoga, but in a good way.

I’m not usually a big fan of leotards, but, uh, Ranma and Akane can both really rock them. (I’d also love to see uncursed Ranma in one, I’m sure his butt would look just as good.) Akane showed up to the match dressed like a ringside coach, and it just radiates powerful butch lesbian energy. The referee to the match is also dressed in a pretty masculine way, and similarly gives off wonderful vibes. Just a really aesthetically pleasing episode for me.

The pacing was also really tight. A lot of stuff got packed into the episode’s runtime, and I’d love to compare it to this section of the manga to see if that’s because it’s a particularly dense storyline or because they made the decision to just stuff the episode with as much manga as they could. We’ll get to my rating after the Character Spotlight, but this is just a treat of an episode, and one I have to say again that I wasn’t anticipating in the slightest. Major kudos to everyone who worked on this episode.

Okay, so, now let’s do a Spotlight on Kodachi. The big reason I held off on doing one last week is that her last name hadn’t been revealed, and her Kuno-ness is kind of a big part of who she is, I didn’t want to wait for the next time I decided to give her a Spotlight to cover that part of her.

Alright, so, as usual, let’s start with voice actors. In English, she actually had three different VA’s over the course of the series run. I’ve actually decided that, going forward, with cases like these I’m just going to focus on who the current voice actors are, and talk about the new ones when they appear. Her first actress in my native tongue is Teryl Rothery, who is actually more well known for her live-action work. She appears to play a main character in Stargate SG-1, which I have never seen, and has filled the role of Jean Loring in Arrow. (Which I have seen, but never noticed that Ray Palmer’s ex-wife was in the show in the seasons I saw of it.) In Japanese, she’s portrayed by Saeko Shimazu, who has actually played a role in every Rumiko Takahasi anime adaptation from that era, so that’s neat.

They definitely play the character a little differently. Shimazu is genuinely fantastic at playing Kodachi as the well known anime archetype of the Ojou. The way she does Kodachi’s laugh might be the best Ojou laugh I’ve ever heard, and she’s generally good playing the character oddly seriously. Like, if you didn’t know Kodachi was a dangerously violent person, her voice acting would just make you think she’s a soft spoken, very feminine girl. It fits her whole aesthetic really well, honestly. Rothery went in a very different direction. I feel like it’s hard to think of Kodachi as anything other than a villain in her voice, she’s more clearly malevolent, like a Sailor Moon villainess. Her version of the laugh is a lot more unhinged sounding, for lack of a more appropriate word.

That kind of leads into one thing I was kind of surprised to notice. It feels as though the Dub and Sub versions of this character differ quite a bit. In the English Dub, they frequently use words like ‘crazy’, ‘unstable’, and ‘mad’ to describe Kodachi, and in a way it kind of dominates her characterization. I’ll talk more about that in a minute, but I’ll say for now I had to sigh at those bits. But imagine my surprise to see the Sub instead talk about her being ill-mannered, stubborn, tenacious. As far as I can recall, they didn’t use any mental health-related words, instead just focusing on the idea that she will do anything to get what she wants.

This creates two fairly radically different versions of the character, at least for me. And I actually greatly prefer what I’m finding in the Sub. Kodachi there is played much more as a dark mirror to her brother. Ranma might say they’re the same, but they clearly aren’t. Kuno is a jerk, and doesn’t seem to take the objects of his affection’s input. But he also, at the very least, sees himself as honorable, a man of culture, and doesn’t seem like the type to cheat in a competition.

Kodachi has no such scruples. She is utterly ruthless, while also sadistically delighting in causing pain to other people. She is, in a way, defined by the fact that she is constantly trying to cheat, to get any victory she can, even while acting as though there’s nothing wrong with what she does, that’s she’s just a beautiful girl doing what she has to. The way they each fall in love with a different form of Ranma, while hating the other, is also a nice touch.

That was all a lot of nice stuff I said, but sadly it’s alls I gots for ya. Going back to the whole ‘crazy’ thing, that’s definitely the thing that, at least growing up, dominates her character. As far as I can recall, the fandom generally thinks of her as the ‘craziest’ of all the main cast, and that’s...not very good? I feel like, at least among some sectors of culture, we’re trying to be more aware of other people and trying to take in feedback, and ableism feels like one of the last big areas where a lot of people, even those who are otherwise far left, struggle to get past their prejudices. I’m including myself in there, I screw up all the time. But yeah, I think we need to kind of think a lot more about the ‘crazy’ tropes in media, especially the ones that associate with violence and evil characters. So far at least, I don’t really have a lot to dig into with Kodachi especially, but it’s something I’ll have in mind going forward.

The other area I feel like I have to rain on this Spotlight a little is just what Kodachi brings to the dynamic of the show. Which is mostly...not a lot. Of all the main characters who are a part of the primary love dodecahedron, she is the one who feels like could generally just not exist without impacting anything. She basically just does what Kuno does, but in the opposite direction. Ranma is going to end up with a lot of suitors, and someone else generally fills the role of ‘violent and amoral’ much better than Kodachi, plus she’ll be appearing pretty soon from where we are now. At least as of now, Kodachi is a character I find doesn’t hurt the show at all, but also doesn’t particularly make it better.

If it wasn’t clear from all the gushing before, I really liked this episode. But how much? Where does it fall among the ranks of all the episodes I’ve seen thus far? After some careful consideration, I think I’m actually going to put this at the number two spot. It really was that good, I have very little bad to say. The only reason it didn’t take the top spot is that I just love episode 7 too much. That makes the current standings:

Episode 7: Enter Ryoga, the Eternal ‘Lost Boy’

Episode 12: A Woman's Love is War! The Martial Arts Rhythmic Gymnastics Challenge!

Episode 9: True Confessions! A Girl's Hair is Her Life!

Episode 2: School is No Place for Horsing Around

Episode 6: Akane's Lost Love... These Things Happen, You Know

Episode 8: School is a Battlefield! Ranma vs. Ryoga

Episode 11: Ranma Meets Love Head-On! Enter the Delinquent Juvenile Gymnast!

Episode 4: Ranma and...Ranma? If It’s Not One Thing, It’s Another

Episode 5: Love Me to the Bone! The Compound Fracture of Akane's Heart

Episode 1: Here’s Ranma

Episode 3: A Sudden Storm of Love

Episode 10: P-P-P-Chan! He's Good For Nothin'

This has been a really fun one! Next time, we’ll be covering lucky episode number 13, “A Tear in a Girl-Delinquent's Eye? The End of the Martial Arts Rhythmic Gymnastics Challenge!”, which will also be the ending to this little arc. I’m excited to join you then, and see if that episode fulfilled the promise in this episode’s set-up! See you all then!

[belladonnaandulriched]

the artist | chapter nine

My fingers quivered and quaked from the nervous tension but I was in fact able to dial Stone's number. I brought the phone up to my ear.

“Hey, golden age of Hollywood,” he greeted me in a jovial tone. Even though it had been a couple of days, it was nice to hear his voice again. It was especially nice to hear his voice over the phone as he sounded much happier and not as exhausted as he did that evening when I met him and Dave.

“Hey, Stone, can I ask you a favor?” I started in a soft voice.

“Sure—why are you whispering, though?”

“It's a secret,” I assured him.

“Okay,” he lowered his voice to that of a low husky whisper.

“I want you to—not sell Joey flowers if he asks for them.”

“Why?”

My mind raced for the right answer. I was already in too deep. If there was another thing the pandemic taught me, it was the power of a lie.

“He's allergic to a few species,” I replied.

“Oh?”

“Yeah. I forget which ones he said, but yeah—he's pretty allergic. Like painfully so. You know—it's the pollen out here. It's radically different from that in upstate New York.”

“Oh, I bet it is. I never would've thought of that, if I'm honest. But, it sounds strange given how Dave and I have planted the seeds and made them come alive and whatnot. We try to make it so the pollen won't be so territorial, if you will…” He cleared his throat. “...but I guess if Chris can be allergic to a certain chrysanthemum we’ve bred, then I s’pose anything’s possible with our gardening. I kinda like Joey, too, he sounds like a cool guy...” And then I heard a soft beep on his end.

“Oh, wait, hang tight, Holly. I'm getting another call. Can I hit you back in a few minutes?”

“Absolutely,” I told him as I felt my throat close up. He switched lines, which in turn left me in total silence.

“What have I done,” I muttered to myself. But I wanted to see where we would go from there. I wanted to see what Stone would do and I wanted to see what Joey would do. I nibbled on my bottom lip and tried to calm my nerves but it was almost useless.

The line crackled back on.

“Holly? You still there?”

“Yeah, I never left.”

“That was in fact Joey—he wants to send you some new pencils.”

I opened my mouth but no sound came out.

“He told me he tried calling you but the line was busy. He called me because Lars said about me being an art guy myself.”

“Oh, you are?”

“Yeah. I’m not nearly as big on it as him, but I'm definitely there, though. But yeah, Joey said he'll send you something nice and perfect for any new pieces of art because he wants you to have it. He saw a box of graphites and he thought of you. His words, not mine.” My heart skipped a couple of beats and I could feel the butterflies whirring up inside of my stomach.

This was just one thing.

Not even a couple of hours later, while I was at my computer and doing some doodles to acquaint myself with character movement, Chris called me.

“Holly—I'm at the Blick store right now. I found some ink pens and I was thinking of you doing some pen and ink kinda stuff.”

“Like, black ink or colored?”

“Black. Like you could start there and then work your way towards color. You know, help you experiment and stuff.”

“You just want me to draw you in black ink,” I teased him with an accompanying snicker.

He let out a huff of a sigh.

“Okay, fine, you caught me.”

I giggled at that.

And then once I hung up the phone, Joey called me.

“Hey, hi—did Stone tell you?”

“Tell me what?”

“About the—the thing I wanna give ya, the graphites.”

“Yeah, he did.”

“Yes! Well, let me just say, I—” He cleared his throat. “—I hope you like them. I gotta tell ya, Hahlls—I did what I did to get 'em for you.”

I parted my lips but no sound came out at that.

I thought about what I had told Stone to do for me and I wondered if Joey knew at all. Or perhaps he was just being sweet and I opened a stupid loophole behind his back. Either way, I had no other choice but to ruminate on what I did for a bit. I saved the drawing and closed the laptop, and lay down on my bed for a moment and gazed up at the ceiling.

Maybe I just jumped the gun. Joey wanted to do something kind for me, much like how Chris wanted to do something kind for me. I also thought about hitting back Will with the prospect of heading on back up there so as to share my aesthetic eye as he described it.

I definitely jumped the gun, especially when there was a knock on the front door and the sound of it jarred me out of my daydream.

“I'll get it!” my dad called out. I froze in place. I pictured either Joey, Chris, or Will there at the front step and I knew I would have to come clean with my parents right then. I pursed my lips together as I heard the door swing open in the next room.

I closed my eyes and held my breath.

“Holly?” my dad called out. I opened my eyes and found myself face to face with the cottage cheese overhead.

“Holly, something came for you!”

I let out a low whistle and rolled off of the bed. I padded into the next room to find him holding a brand new metallic box of graphite pencils in hand. Nice graphite pencils, the kind that rich people before the pandemic could buy without a moment's hesitation. And the kit that came with a pair of erasers, a pure white one and a kneaded one, plus a pencil sharpener, even though I had no shortage on those.

He scraped to get them, I just knew it, especially once I remembered how he spent on that lemonade for me. I regretted sending Stone that request.

“Who's it from?” asked my mom.

“No idea. I heard the knock on the door and then I looked out and these were laying on our doormat.”

She entered the room from the kitchen and showed me a smile.

“Aw, sounds like Holly's got a secret admirer,” she remarked. “They were kind enough to get her the real deal.”

“Yeah, they—they were,” I added in a soft voice. He handed me the box with a lopsided smile, much like Joey's smile and with the same warmth as Chris. I held the tin before me and stroked the top of the lid with the pad of my thumb. I expected the same to happen with Chris within time; but in the meantime, all I could do was head back to my room to try out the pencils for myself.

But at the same time, I wondered if this was the beginning of something else, aside from Chris. He would be the one to send me flowers and shower me with gifts, whereas Joey did it whenever he could and also because he wanted to do it. He wanted me to have it, as Stone said. He did it because he wanted to. He did it because he liked me.

And Chris was the same way.

I started to wonder about Lars, too, like if he had any aces up his sleeve that he wanted to show off to me. I could only make an uneducated guess about that before I headed back up to the gallery to assist him and Will in the speakeasy. If I had to make a call for either him or Chris to pick me up whenever he could, then I would have to. I had no other way, anyway, just how I was sure Joey had no other way with the little money he scrounged from his pocket.

[dat-town]

Bowling date

Characters: Jeongguk & You 

Genre: fluff fluff fluff (i was supposed to write something else but watching his vlive distracted me and apparently i haven’t written fluff with him before)

Words: 2422

Summary: Jungkook is trying to be cool but fails (because he’s too cute for his own good) featuring you trying to impress him with you non-existing bowling skills.

It definitely wasn’t the wisest idea to say yes to a bowling date. Yeah sure, your crush of more than two years finally asked you out and you would have been an idiot to turn him down… But bowling? You had absolutely no idea about it. Yet, you were too delighted to care about sweet little nothings like this when he walked up to you after art class and asked if you are free on Friday and if you liked bowling. Your response was immediate, you didn’t even think until it hit home: you will go bowling with Jeon freaking Jungkook, the class’ ace and most popular boy. And you will probably humiliate yourself while trying to act like you know how to play because your chatty mouth said that you loved bowling very much. Is it too late to turn back now? you wonder and your steps halt in the middle of a busy street in Hongdae.

Jungkook even offered to pick you up but your mother would probably get a heart attack if she saw you get on a motorbike with someone. In the end you agreed to meet at the bowling centrum which is now in front of you in all its glory. Based on its shiny, trendy colours alongside with the modern architecture it must be a popular place among high schoolers. Maybe it won’t be that bad. You fidget with the end of your shirt and brush a reckless lock behind your ear while texting Jungkook that you arrived. It makes your heart flutter that he answers right away: come in, i’m at the reception!

You take a huge breath trying to calm down your rattling heart and you walk up to the entrance on trembling legs. Just as you want to push the glass door, someone opens it wide for you and said someone welcomes you with a heart-warming smile.

“Hi! I’m glad you could make it.” Jungkook ushers you in while holding the door for you You thank his chivalry with a shy nod as you quickly make your way inside.

“This way,” he beckons you towards the playing area and you guess he’d already booked a lane for you.

While walking next to him, your breath hitches in your throat when you take a proper look at him. You rarely see him in anything but the school uniform and you are taken aback how good he really looks. Of course, he looks dashing in plain button-ups and the boring grey jacket you have at school but this is different. Good different. You feel your heart skip a beat at the sight of him in a simple black t-shirt tucked into his ripped jeans. His tan skin glows under the neon lights and a strand of dark fringe is peeking out from under his beanie. You aren’t even aware you’re staring until he catches you red-handed in the act. You look away bashfully but you’re not the only one blushing.

“Do you want anything to drink? I can grab us something while you change,” he offers like a gentleman but you panic for a moment and almost choke on your own saliva.

“Ch-change?”

You didn’t know bowling requires any special equipment or outfit. You decided on something nice but comfortable when you chose your white A-line skirt and a pretty light blue blouse. Maybe it’s not the most appropriate outfit for a date with sport activities but you wanted to leave a good impression. Your skirt reaches your knees anyway so you should be okay. Unless you were supposed to bring something to change into. Which you didn’t do because you had no idea.

“Your shoes,” Jungkook explains with a confused frown while pointing at your feet and you visibly gulp.

“Oh yeah…” you giggle nervously, a part of you already wishing the ground to swallow you up before you make an even bigger fool out of yourself. You add in a quiet mutter. “ How could I forget?”

You glance around quickly and feel relieved when you catch a glimpse of the shoe rental station in one corner. It would have been way too awkward to admit you don’t even have bowling shoes to begin with. You snap out of your momentary trance by his sweet voice calling your name and you look up at him. God, he’s so tall and handsome. Like a Greek statue sculpted by one of the finest artists of its era.

“So do you?”

“Do I what?” you blink at him still dazed. What did he ask again?

“Want a drink?” he flashes you his signature wide smile. Luckily he seems rather amused than annoyed by your slow-witted reactions. You clear your throat as you try to get a hold of yourself.

“Uh… yes, a Coke will be fine,” you manage to get out and sigh while you watch him turning his back to you, heading to the bar to get your drinks. You bury your face into your hands with a groan and overcome the urge to stamp your feet on the ground at your helplessness.

You’re already here, you shouldn’t screw up now, you remind yourself and walk over to the guy in the corner asking for a shoe in your size. It’s an understatement to say that you are dumbfounded by the poor design. It looks straight out of a 1960’ American movie but you don’t comment on it and thank the employee for his help. You quickly return to your and Jungkook’s booth and manage to put both shoes on successfully before the boy arrives with two bottles of Coke. Only then you notice that he wears the exact same kind of shoes as you. Even though you know probably everyone here has the same brand, you can’t help those nasty butterflies in your stomach at the thought of your couple look.

“Are you ready?” Jungkook turns to you excitedly and does some weird warming-up ritual with a few squats and hand gestures. You shyly imitate him and look at the long bowling lane in fear.

“Well, it’s been a while since I last played so I will be quite rusty,” you warn him trying to sound confident while praying that beginner’s luck will be on your side today.

“Me, too. I might have lost my touch,” Jungkook says with a reassuring smile and steps to the machine to start a new game. He stops at the step which requires the addition of players’ names in order. You’re about to tell him that he should go first when he speaks up: “Do you want me to go ahead?”

“Yes, please,” you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. He must have sensed your insecurity but he doesn’t tease you about it. For that you can’t be grateful enough.

You take a sip of your drink while you watch Jungkook choosing from the neon coloured balls and settling with a purple one. You try not to stare too obviously as your gaze follows the graceful motion of his body as he releases the ball and knocks down eight pins under one try.

“Wow! It’s you out of practice? Then how are you at your best?” you exclaim in awe and clap eagerly when his second shot leaves the alley with no pins standing and apparently it’s a thing called spare.

Jungkook just shrugs shyly and then the machine signals that it’s your turn. Your blood turns cold as you walk up to the balls. You only hesitate a little before picking up a pretty pink that caught your eyes. However, it barely budges as you try to lift it.

“Woah,” you groan frustrated. You haven’t expected it to be so much heavier than a regular ball.

“Check out the weight first! I usually play with the one that weighs thirteen pounds,” Jungkook comes to your rescue again and you laugh at yourself when you realize you tried to lift up the ball that had the number 15 printed on it.

“I know, I just wanted to try it,” you lie and you hope it isn’t as transparent as you think so. You go for the nine pounds ball and fortunately it’s much lighter than the former one. You are confused because of the three holes in it but since you try to look totally in control, you experimentally stuck in random three of your fingers. You try to copy Jungkook’s fluid movements but you almost end up falling forward when you reach the line but forget to release the ball. When it eventually drops out of your hand, it goes straight into one of the two semi-cylindrical channels on both sides of the lane. It earns you zero points that’s called gutter according to the screen showing your results.

“Oops,” you try to mask your awkwardness by being funny about it and based on Jungkook’s light chuckle, it’s working.

“Don’t be disheartened. You just have to keep trying,” Jungkook encourages you when your second ball ends up in the gutter, too. He’s way too nice and considerate.

After a while your constant failures can’t be blamed on being out of practice. Especially because when you do hit a pin or two, you literally throw a celebration way too happy for somebody who has played this before. But you have Jungkook to cheer you on and he even offers to help you improve your technique and posture.

“Let me help you. You are too stiff,” he declares at one point probably having enough of watching your miserable attempts. He walks up behind you and put his hands gently on your waist. You freeze immediately, not knowing what to do. You can feel his warmth close to your own and his breath keeps hitting your neck.

“Here like this, you should bend your knees and lean a little forward while you give a push to your ball,” he explains in a serious tone demonstrating by guiding your arm back and forth while you stare straight ahead targeting the pins that stand stubbornly after you successfully knocked down three of them. “Make sure not to spin it by turning your wrist. Okay, so four small steps and then do it like I showed.”

He lets you go and you do as he advised. Your ball is rolling in a straight line unlike your previous ones and you can’t do anything but gape when you miraculously manage to hit all the remaining pins in one go.

“Oh my god!” you squeal loudly and before you could stop yourself, you jump into Jungkook’s arms. He tenses up for a second, clearly not expecting your sudden outburst but recovers smoothly by patting your back a few times before you step back hesitantly.

“Uh… sorry,” you offer lamely. It’s so freaking embarrassing, you can’t even look him in the eye.

“No-no, it’s okay,” Jungkook coughs and you’re a little late to realize he does it to mask his own shyness. It’s cute. Just like the way he acted all sweet the whole evening and it helps you loosen up a bit. Bowling is actually quite fun once you get the hang of it. You enjoy taking turns, cheering for each other and chatting about literally everything - school, art projects, songs, video games, yourselves - while you’re at it. In the end, your time runs out way too quickly.

“You didn’t even have to try so hard. You would have won anyway,” you comment while you’re packing preparing to leave after two hours of playing. It was harder than you imagined, it physically tired you but you’re still all hyped up.

“I just wanted to impress you,” Jungkook shrugs next to you and freezes when you stop mid-action to look at him. “Did I say that out loud?”

“Yeah, you did,” you answer with a nod and find yourself smiling. Happiness blossoms in your chest as he stares at you like a bunny caught in highlights. Maybe it’s time for you to be honest with him, too. Without sincerity, there’s really no point of this, no matter how much you’d like to get on his good side. You have watched him for two years from afar, you’ll be fine even if he decides he doesn’t like the real you.

“Jungkook... I have to tell you something…” you begin while biting your lip nervously and intertwining your fingers in front of you.

“Let me guess:  you have no idea how bowling works,” he cuts in with an evident smirk on his handsome face and you gape at him.

“You knew?”

“I figured it out pretty quickly but you were too cute trying so I didn’t say a word,” he seems genuine when he compliments you and you find yourself blushing even harder when he continues: “By the way, you are really pretty tonight. Not that you look bad on other days, you’re beautiful no matter what, I just… Ahh, I didn’t said it earlier because I wanted to seem cool but I guess I’m ruining it now...”

“Thanks,” you interrupt him before he could say more because you’re already so flustered, you feel on the verge of combusting. Nobody has ever told you anything like this before.

However, Jungkook still looks a little uncomfortable, the way he tucks his hands into his jeans’ pockets and looks anywhere but you gives him away.

“Didn’t I disappoint you, though? I know my reputation is more…” he pauses for a moment to search for the right word. “...interesting.”

Oh. A bad boy with a motorbike, they say but even since you took the same art class and you watched him working so diligently at every lesson, you knew it’s bullshit. You didn’t fall for the rumours about him but the boy with doe eyes.

“No, you are way more interesting. Perfect,” you blurt out before you could stop yourself but the beaming smile on his face worth it.

“So are you up for another date?”

“Absolutely!” you reply without hesitation but this time you are smarter than saying yes to anything. “But not bowling.”

Jungkook pouts.

“Why not?” he looks at you with pleading eyes and you nudge him for his childishness. “I’m kidding. I’m fine with whatever. Though, I’d be happy to properly teach you bowling one day.”

“Okay. One day,” you promise because you have a feeling you’ll have lots of time to go on dates in the future. And maybe someday, you’ll let him take you to a bowling date again.

[tessatechaitea]

Deathstork #14

I wonder if DC would be up for publishing a Deathstork variant cover so I don't have to Photoshop every issue.

Does the Ikon suit's gravity sheath not extend to the sleeves? Seems like an amputation disaster waiting to happen! Or maybe it just can't stop needle points?

Deathstork smashes the guy Dex sent him after between a Dumpster brand trash receptacle and an alley wall. After that, he has enough time to change back into his civilian gear before passing out from whatever was in the needle. And that's exactly the moment Power Girl reappears! She missed all the Deathstork stuff and just thinks Slade is a victim of the rampaging taxi driver. Rose visits a pawn shop to pick up a sword that's now been in her family for generations, wink, wink! Fittingly, it's inscribed with the word "Rose" in Hmong. Lucky! I mean, the story is called "Destiny" but it's really more "Lucky!", right? Oh! Back at Power Girl's Power Cave (a studio apartment on the some compass direction side of New York), I learn that one of Deathstork's sleeves is missing. I either missed how that happened or Raptor still has it. Anyway, one benefit of being taken home by Power Girl is that she decontaminates Deathstork's radioactive suit. It also turns out Deathstork is currently blind. Well, that finally explains that! Remember how he bumped into the wall while visiting Pat awhile back? Sure, that was a few issues ago but it apparently took place in the future. Stupid stories that don't tell themselves in a linear fashion. I still don't even know why this story is called "Twilight"! There hasn't been one teenage vampire or dying god in it at all! Oh! Maybe Deathstork is the dying god. Or vampire! The Ranking! No change! I'm assuming Slade went blind after being injected with whatever he was injected with. But he couldn't even shoot the cabbie in the face so maybe he was already blind but he just didn't know it yet because all of his other senses are as fine-tuned as his reflexes. He didn't realize he couldn't see because his other senses were compensating so well! That totally explains why he couldn't shoot that guy in the face. What also explains it? That cabbie is probably some super villain! I bet he's not dead at all! It's not like Deathstork saw him die, what with being blind and all.

[helloworlddemo1122-yahoopar-blog]

The Guardians of the Galaxy Promise a Bigger, Bolder and Baby Groot-ier 'Vol. 2'

Twenty-five miles outside Atlanta, down a nondescript rural road and past a security checkpoint where proper credentials, I assure you, are absolutely required, a spaceship has landed. The arches and flooring that make up the ship are pristinely white, like some sort of cosmic Apple store, and yellow-orange light glows from all directions, as if the whole thing had been dropped inside a lava lamp. Its passengers include a space outlaw wearing a shirt with a candy bar logo emblazoned on it, a blue-ish, tattooed alien meathead, a woman with green skin and another woman in skintight green spandex with antennae sprouting from her head, and Kurt Russell.

Russell affably welcomes three-fifths of the so-called Guardians of the Galaxy aboard his ship, a wide grin spreading across his scruffy face. The alien with the antennae, Mantis, looks on skeptically, however, as Peter Quill, Gamora and Drax survey the ship in wonder. Fleetwood Mac's "The Chain" swells as Russell pats Quill on the back. And if you don't love me now / You will never love me again / I can still hear you saying / You would never break the chain...

"Chris, keep looking at your dad, even if it feels too long!" a deafening voice booms over the music. This voice of God belongs to director James Gunn, whose spiky head is hunched over a monitor, a microphone hovering near his mouth as he watches the scene unfold.

It's late in April and production is currently more than halfway complete on Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 at Pinewood Studios, which Marvel has established as its home base for the foreseeable future. Today, one behemoth soundstage has been transformed into the spaceship to film scene 113. Production moves on to shoot a close-up of Mantis (played by newcomer Pom Klementieff) as she announces in a loopy, slow drawl, "We are here." The orange lava turns blue. "They're taking a trip on Kurt Russell's spaceship. His freaky, creepy, '60s, pop-art spaceship," Gunn tells a group of reporters, ET included, on set. That's all Gunn will say about this scene, though he and his cast are happy to speak to how the next volume in their operatic space adventure will push the furthest edges of the Marvel universe.

"It's a different type of pressure that we're under now. Before the pressure was, 'No one knows you. What's it going to be like to be the first Marvel movie that fails?'" Chris Pratt, who plays Peter Quill, admits during a break from shooting. Pratt is tanner in person, his floppy hair a lighter shade of blond and tight, gray shirt accenting his muscles. He laughs that good-natured Chris Pratt laugh as he recalls, "I can't even tell you how many times I answered that question. I was like, 'Oh, god! This is not looking good!'"

That pressure, at least, has lifted. As Pratt puts it, "People really liked it!" which undersells exactly how much people liked it. Guardians of the Galaxy was liked by critics to the tune of a 91 percent fresh rating on Rotten Tomatoes and the movie-going public made it the third-highest grossing film of 2014. (And Marvel's third highest-grossing film ever, after Avengers and Iron Man 3.)

"I think the pressure we're feeling now is, How do we do the same thing in terms of wowing an audience?" Pratt, who has only become a bigger movie star himself due to the success of Jurassic World, explains. "Getting people to come in thinking they know what they want but leave having got what they want, but it wasn't what they wanted to begin with."

That message is clear and Gunn echoes it wholly. "I think there's a trap a lot of sequels fall in, where they say, 'OK, we had that beat where there was a dance-off, so what is our dance-off in this movie? And we had that 'We are Groot' moment, so what is our 'We are Groot' moment?'" he says, his forehead setting. "I'm like, 'Screw all of that! This is its own thing.'"

Which doesn't mean that Vol. 2 is throwing out what audiences loved about the first movie. The entire rag tag team, from Pratt, Zoe Saldana and Bradley Cooper's voice as Rocket, down to Glenn Close's Nova Prime Irani Rael, will return. Instead, the movie is doubling down on everything that worked and wagering that good will to take even bigger risks.

"I think this is perhaps even more unique and more daring than the first film," Marvel Studios president, Kevin Feige, boldly proclaimed earlier in the day, seated in the studio's "war room," a conference room decked out in concept art for the film. "In terms of there's maybe an easy way and a hard way, but the hard way maybe could be more interesting."

The easy way might have included re-growing fan-favorite Groot, the sentient tree voiced by Vin Diesel, back to his adult size before the events of Vol. 2. And Gunn discloses that he "totally, one hundred percent" almost did that, before asking himself, Why not Baby Groot?

"He can kick some a**. He's also an idiot. He's a baby! He's not very smart," Gunn teases of a "very different" Groot. "He's a unique little fella. And he's pretty great in the movie, even though he's not even there! We got the guy on a stick and people are laughing." (Though Baby Groot was not filming during our visit, prop master Russell Bobbitt held court by a protective case from which he pulled out the 10-inch Baby Groot figure used on set. As Bobbitt passed around Baby Groot to a chorus of cooing, he said even the crew members "just die" when he brings Groot out. All of which is to brag: yes, I have held the real Baby Groot.)

Gunn can't help but laugh. "All the time Chris is like, 'Godd**mit. He's going to steal the f**king movie!'"

Marvel Studios

Then there is the extensive roster of new characters joining the Guardians, characters who might just be stranger and more alien than even the talking tree and gun-wielding raccoon -- like Klementieff's Mantis, an actual alien. The Mantis found within the pages of Marvel comics has often been painted Gamora green and is a master martial artist who can communicate with plants and has special empathic abilities. The latter, it seems, may be the only part that holds true for Gunn's adaptation, as his Mantis is also able to manipulate and change others' emotions.

"You're going to think that I'm crazy, but I haven't read the comic books," Klementieff says sheepishly, revealing Gunn instructed her not to. On set, wires protrude from the actress's forehead where her antennae will later be CGI'd in and special effects markers dot her face. "I knew James' version was so different from the pictures and drawings that I saw, that, you know, it would kind of f**k up the [result]...I didn't want the character to be, like, sexual and usually they're always like that. I think we are creating something different."

"I can tell you that Pom is somebody who will be on your radar for the rest of your life after this," Pratt predicts, though neither he nor Klementieff is willing to give away details about how their characters interact. "Like Dave was born to play Drax, I feel like Pom was totally born to play Mantis."

It's not completely coincidental that Pratt should mention Dave Bautista, the former WWE wrester-turned-actor, as Feige hinted that Drax develops a special bond with Mantis over the course of the movie. "At the very core of Drax, he's really just heartbroken," Bautista, taking a break in full Drax makeup with an Under Armor hoodie casually draped around him, reiterates. "There's a real innocence about Drax and I think Mantis has that as well. There's just a very child-like innocence with both characters."

Mantis' introduction comes hand-in-hand with Kurt Russell's, playing Peter Quill's father. The character was teased in the first movie as "something very ancient we've never seen here before" and, in comic lore, Quill's father is the Spartoi alien J'son. Ahead of the press day, Gunn had announced that he was diverging from the source material and that Quill's biological father would not be J'son. Yet in the war room, artwork for a spaceship was labeled as "J'son's Ship" and a planet in another was branded J'son, giving the impression that J'son might not be a person in the movie, but a location. On set, Russell sat in a chair with J'son sewn into the back.

So, what does Gunn have to say for it? "I say the same thing. There is no J'son in the MCU," he coyly protests. "He isn't J'son. He isn't named J'son in the movie. That's just flat out the case. But here's the thing. We'll probably all know who the father is by the time this movie comes out, because the movie really isn't about that."

Three short months later, Gunn was ready to let that mystery go. J'son being a planet and not a person might have been a better clue than anyone could have guessed at the time, as Gunn revealed at Comic-Con that Russell plays Ego the Living Planet. (Gunn also admitted to taking extra precautions to keep us in the dark, writing on Facebook, "When our online press day happened on set, Kurt Russell sat in a chair that read 'J'son,' and all of our script pages and artwork featuring him used the same name.") With that knowledge in place, the movie will deal with Quill being pulled between his biological father (yes, a living planet) and his adopted father, the Ravager, Yondu (Michael Rooker).

"You get to find out who he hopes his father is and who he wishes his father is, and you get to find out whether or not that is the reality," Pratt weighs in. Revealing any further details would surely enter spoiler territory, so Pratt turns the conversation to what he can safely confirm: Kurt Russell is very cool.

"There are actors that I loved growing up, there’s a handful of them, and he is absolutely right at the top of that list and has not once done anything to disappoint the inner child in me," Pratt, who was later spotted laughing with Russell at craft services, gushes. "We're really kindred spirits, I think. Me and Anna [Faris] and Kurt and Goldie [Hawn], I feel like we are the same in some parallel universe. Anna's oftentimes been compared to Goldie Hawn. I guess some people have made that comparison with me and Kurt, kind of like a blue-collar type of dude. He loves to hunt and be outdoors and he's-- I don’t know. I just really, really love him." Pratt chuckles and leans in. "I'm in love with Kurt Russell!"

Perhaps it is the only all-out proclamation of love heard on the Guardians of the Galaxy set, but quite frankly, the thesis of the movie seems to be all about it. With Marvel continuing to test the limits of superhero fatigue -- 2017 marks the first year the studio will release three movies, with Spider-Man: Homecoming in July and Thor: Ragnarok in November -- the Guardians team is focused on making a movie that is as personal as it is action packed.

"For as fun as it is, for outrageous as it is, with characters named Taserface and with Baby Groot killing people and throwing them around, it is very, very emotional and not cynical in the least. It is very, very truthful and sort of unabashedly so, in its emotions," Feige reveals, leaning back in his chair. "It's a very special combination. That's sort of the crux of this whole movie."

Saldana puts it another way. "[Other movies] are all about jokes and punch lines and lubricated muscles and good shots and bigger muscles and other sequels and great f**king hairdos that never come undone," she laments. "And nobody cries. Nobody bleeds. Nobody feels a tremendous loss or void. And these guys are aching all the time. They're just trying to not be so f**ked up. Every day, they're trying to do one less bad thing. And they're trying, because they are a**holes by nature."