#oh also another sign of things getting worse: we went from 10 eps to 40 (of bad pacing)!!!!!! wtf

[rinbylin]

watching the first episode of the 2017 webdrama and then skimming through the sanitised 2021 remake (starring whr - fun fact) is the same bewildering and depressing experience of watching addicted 2016 then moving on to what SWM 2023 did to the story in the process of what it believed to be "fixing" the problematics of its canon

[ettadunham]

A Buffy rewatch 6x08 Tabula Rasa

aka i don’t think this is going to work either

Welcome to this dailyish text post series where I will rewatch an episode of Buffy and go on an impromptu rant about it for an hour. Is it about one hyperspecific thing or twenty observations? 10 or 3k words? You don’t know! I don’t know!!! In this house we don’t know things.

And today’s episode outs itself as a product of early 00s television as Michelle Branch performs in-universe to create a sad music montage, concluding an ep that’s otherwise generally remembered for its comedic beats.

Tabula Rasa is the episode that I alluded to most with Something Blue way back in season 4 – so I actually went back to that post before sitting down to write this, to fully appreciate that connection. Apparently I closed that rant saying “we’re here to do a Buffy rewatch, not to have fun”, and that’s the same energy you can expect here.

I mean, I love the silliness in Tabula Rasa, don’t get me wrong. The insane assumptions the characters make after the memory spell, based on stuff like Giles and Spike’s accent, Willow wearing Xander’s jacket, and Anya and Giles nodding off beside each other, lead to all kinds of hilarities. Just as it’s nice to see all the things that still stay the same, and what the characters do get right – like Buffy and Dawn realizing that they’re sisters as a result of their natural banter, or Willow and Tara’s sexual tension seeping through despite everything.

But the most interesting scenes for me remain to be the ones preceding that. Specifically, the talk the gang has about the revelations regarding Buffy’s resurrection at Xander and Anya’s place.

It’s just so juicy, guys, down to its smallest details. It starts with Anya wondering if Buffy walked on clouds or had a harp in heaven, and Willow just kind of looks on with dead eyes, and Xander upon prompting says something dismissive like “you have many good qualities”.

Tara though? Tara’s quick to validate Anya, saying that it’s not stupid to think about what it’s been like for Buffy, but there are many heavenly dimensions, and they just don’t know.

God, I love Tara. Did I mention that already? I think I may have been too subtle about it the last 40 times.

I LOVE TARA.

There, that felt right.

Afterwards, we get a surprising amount of self-reflection from Willow. I say “surprising”, because it’s then followed with another insane plan of “let’s wipe my friend’s memory with magic to make this go away”, so clearly, Willow needs some additional work in that department.

WILLOW:  And we took her away from that. We wrecked it for her. XANDER:  We didn’t wreck. We didn’t know. WILLOW:  We didn’t wanna know. We were so selfish. I was so selfish.

I love this, because not only is the narrative confirming what as a viewer I already deduced, it also reaffirms a quality in Willow that’s easy to look over at this stage of her character arc. Her self-awareness.

Xander is a mostly emotion-driven character. He rarely if ever interrogates his own motives, just goes with what his gut tells him is right. In this case, his go-to approach is to simplify, and focus on what feels important. Buffy’s alive, and he’s happy that she’s alive. The rest they’ll just need to work on.

Willow is pretty much the exact opposite of that. For better or worse, she needs to justify all her actions to herself, and she’s ready to beat herself up over any perceived imperfection.

Or find a quick solution to her problems that stops her from feeling any pain or guilt about it...

Tara is of course the one that gets to the heart of it all, by saying that they need to stop obsessing over what’s been already done, and just focus on helping Buffy. (To quote myself from literally 2 seconds ago: “I love Tara”.) Anya’s quick to agree with her, and Xander supports it too by saying that they just need to spend more time with Buffy.

Willow though instead has the insane idea to just wipe Buffy’s memory, because “video clubs won’t fix this”. But she can. She can fix it. Fix the world. She can make it go poof. And that’ll make her stop feeling horrible about it too.

Tara, whom I love, obviously gets upset at that. And Xander and Anya at this point just… leave. Which, you know, I get it, things are starting to get personal and they can read the room, but also…  This sort of leads to a pattern for me of the Scoobies not really holding each other responsible this season. The argument that Tara and Willow are about to have is about Willow’s approach to magic and the world and people around her. This isn’t only affecting their relationship, as the episode itself will point out.

So, ideally I feel like Xander and Anya should’ve said something too. But then again, maybe they haven’t yet truly considered the implications of what Willow was suggesting at this point, as opposed to Tara, who just found out that Willow used the same spell on her.

Remember all that self-awareness that I mentioned with Willow? Well, that goes right out the window the minute she’s confronted with something that she’s already justified in her mind. Tara specifically uses the phrase that Willow “violated her mind”, and tells her that she’s just helping herself at this point. Fixing things to her liking, including Tara herself.

Which Willow completely fails to internalize, because justifying her actions to herself is so much easier. Instead she focuses on her own fears of abandonment. (“Are you saying you’re gonna leave me?”)

With the ultimatum Tara gives to Willow about not using magic for a week, this is also perhaps our first sign that we’re heading into the direction of a magical addiction metaphor this season. I will probably talk about that more later on, but for now, I’ll just say that while the substance abuse comparison will mostly fail and muck up the original idea behind Willow’s misuse of magic, it does work to a certain degree. It’s ultimately an addiction to power.

And then there’s Giles. I pretty much already said what I wanted to say about Giles leaving with the last episode, and he’s only confirming what I already suspected there, so I’m not really going to reiterate that. In short: I get it, but it’s also the wrong way to help Buffy.

This turn of events of course doesn’t really help Dawn either. No wonder that she’s super upset with Tara for leaving by the end of the episode.

Remember: not only is Dawn the child of divorced parents, her dad has also been absent for most of her life. And then her mom and sister died, and she basically became the foster kid of this ragtag group of young adults (ft. Giles), with Tara and Willow acting as primary parenting figures.

So yeah. I feel super bad for Tara in that moment when Dawn pulls away. You can see how hard this is for Tara, but she refuses to stay in a toxic environment. But I can’t blame Dawn for being a 15-year-old with her own set of abandonment issues either, especially as she’s unaware of the context.

Meanwhile somewhere in town Buffy is making the opposite choice. This time in my rewatch, I was especially hit with seeing Buffy’s reaction after regaining her memories. During the fight, she’s all quippy as Joan, but she checks out the moment the spell is broken. I can’t help but wonder how it was probably even harder for her to have those memories rushing back after forgetting about them.

So Buffy continues her hook-up routine with Spike in order to feel something. And Spike is already being a sleazy manipulative asshole about it, with lines like “I know what kind of girl you really are”.

But then again, Spike is a vampire without a soul. We can’t really expect more from him, and neither does Buffy. That’s kind of the point, sadly enough.

Oh, and of course we’re ending the episode with Michelle Branch performing in the Bronze. Which is very early 00s of her, but strangely enough, I can’t really remember any musician of the same recognition playing before on the show. Even though the Bronze – much like the P3 club on Charmed – serves as the perfect set-up for that.

Goodbye to you all, I guess.