#oh THIS is mean awful bad news jay!!!!!!!! THIS is the dirty no good!!!!!!!!!

[itsalwaysforyou]

i’ve been in absolute anguish over these seven seconds all day btw

[redhoodieone]

Hate You More

A new fic that I was inspired to write! There will be a Part 2 since this is going to get VERY smutty. Enjoy!

WARNINGS: Language. Mentions a little smut.

I’m a princess. Well, a “bit” of a princess. But that’s not exactly my fault. I’m an only child. My mom and dad always wanted one kid and once they had me they were happy...until they divorced when I was eight-years-old and my dad left somewhere far away. Ever since then, it was always just me and mom, which was never a bad thing.

We were close and got along just fine. Every weekend was our Nicholas Sparks movie marathons on the couch, eating a shit ton of strawberry ice cream straight from the carton, and painting each other’s nails and having her braid my hair and tell me stories of when I was little.

Everything was perfect with just me and my mom...until she married him.

Bruce Wayne.

I never thought my mom would ever want to remarry but Bruce somehow stole her heart and made her fall in love with him.

I didn’t want to blame her for being so stupid for marrying him. I mean, Bruce did treat my mom right. I just hated him so much for convincing my mom to move us into his mansion.

So far away from my first home.

But I know he really loves her, despite being known as a billionaire playboy, womanizing, man whore. After three years into their marriage, I noticed he really cared about me and treated me like his daughter; certainly overprotective and reminding me if I ever needed anything to always go to him.

He even helped me get into GCU. With his help, I’m now into my second year. He’s really proud that I’m a responsible, twenty-one year old college student, and that makes me feel good.

But it hasn’t always been perfect with Bruce. Not only did I get a stepdad, but I got THREE asshole stepbrothers: Dick, Jason, and Tim. They’re the boys Bruce adopted.

Dick wasn’t exactly an asshole. He’s twenty-five years old and he’s always in and out of the mansion. He’s a party animal and I rarely see him unless he’s home for Sunday dinners and for Alfred to do his laundry.

Tim is tolerable. He’s always kind to me, but he’s also a shy and awkward fourteen-year-old. He’s seriously a nerd and he’s becoming an addict to coffee and always being on his computer. But he doesn’t bother me at all.

Not like Jason Fucking Todd.

He’s twenty-one years old and is a complete lazy ass who mooches on everyone.

I honestly hated him the second I met Jason. The second my mom and I moved into the mansion, I had set down backpack on the kitchen counter so I could remove my sweater and throw away the empty bag of fried fast food I had for lunch. The moment I turned around, Jason had jumped up to sit on the kitchen counter and had the nerve to pick up my backpack and throw it to the floor.

“Oops! Your shit was in my spot.”

I had my fucking cell phone, laptop, and picture frames of my family in there.

And that’s how it all started. Jason made it very clear he hates me and I refuse to back down and be nice to him. I mean, the fucking asshole has zero respect for me anyways. All he does is drink, eat all the food, and bring bar sluts home to fuck loudly in his bedroom which is right NEXT DOOR TO MINE!!!

All night and early in the mornings. All I can hear is Jason’s headboard slamming repeatedly against the wall and his bimbos screaming, “Oh God! Right there, Jay! Oh my God, HARDER!”

Seeing him afterwards is worse though. I could be walking to the bathroom or the kitchen and he’d just happen to come by to use the bathroom too, or get a drink of water...only using a sheet that’s wrapped around his waist!

He’d fucking smirk at me and I would try so hard to not look down at his big bulge and thick hard on.

Jason is my stepbrother...only my stepbrother, I constantly remind myself.

But Jason is also an asshole. He may look sexy and taste delicious but his one unattractive flaw is his behavior.

And I’m not one to sit back and let assholes walk all over me. I do get back at Jason quite a bit; enough to piss him off.

Today is one of the days I decide to have a big appetite. After my shower, I run downstairs only wearing my comfy pajama short shorts and a black tank top. I remember Dick is at his own apartment and Alfred is away in London on “holiday” as he calls it. Entering the kitchen, I see Mom making breakfast for us: pancakes, bacon, and sausage.

Bruce is sitting at the kitchen table, drinking his coffee and reading on his cellphone. Tim is drinking a cup of coffee (maybe 5th refill?) and eating pancakes and some sausage.

“Good morning,” I say to all of them.

“Good morning sweetie,” Mom replies with such a warm motherly smile.

Bruce grins at me. “Good morning, Y/N.”

All Tim does is nod his head to me and continues to eat.

“I’m starving,” I say and already fill my plate with two pancakes and some bacon and sausage as well.

I take a seat next to Tim and dig in. Ace, Bruce’s dog moves closer to my feet and looks up at me for some food. Fucking puppy dog eyes...I sneak a few pieces of bacon to him.

Mom eventually sits down with hers and Bruce’s plate. He smiles lovingly at her and the two kiss.

It’s a calming morning. Everyone’s eating and just enjoying the silence...until the asshole comes into the kitchen.

Jason literally has no shame. He comes in only wearing his black boxers and has very cute bed head. Stop it, Y/N. He’s completely shirtless. Not even acknowledging he’s in the kitchen, Jason quickly makes a plate for himself which he only puts three pancakes and like two handful sizes of bacon.

I silently growl and tighten my hand around my fork as I’m stuck looking at his bare, muscular upper body. His arms look strong. He’s just...all muscle. All man.

But then I remember he’s a fucking asshole and I hate him.

As if he can feel my eyes on him, Jason quickly glances at me and smirks. He actually fucking flexes his muscles for me.

I immediately look down because I just know my cheeks are red like tomatoes. God, does he have to be so attractive???

“Good morning, princess,” Jason taunts me, after greeting everyone else, obviously. He sits directly in front of me with that shit eating grin. “Did you sleep well last night?”

I glare at him. Fuck him. “Yeah, I did. You know very well that I can’t sleep peacefully unless you bring a whore home and fuck her until she’s blue in the face, Jason. I mean, when it’s so quiet at night, I just can’t fall asleep! It’s impossible! It’s like I HAVE to hear you fuck just to go to sleep!” I say sarcastically.

“So, you do listen to me when I fuck my girls, huh? Is your sex life nonexistent that you have to get yourself off on others who actually get off?” Jason jokes and shoves a piece of bacon in his mouth. “That’s pretty pathetic, even for you, Y/N. At least Tiny Tim here watches internet porn. Maybe you should start getting yourself off with that instead of listening to me fuck.”

“Jason...” Bruce warns. “Don’t even start this morning.”

“Start what? I’m not even doing anything,” Jason says. He raises an eyebrow at me and keeps that fucking smirk on his face.

“Leave Y/N alone, Jason,” Tim butts in.

“Quiet Timbers. Let the princess tell me off. I love it when she gets all red and pissed off.”

My mom glances at me with a serious look, too. Why is she giving me that look when I didn’t even do anything?!

“Aw, there’s sausage?! I didn’t know there was sausage up there!” Jason whines. His eyes dart from my plate over to my mom and Bruce.

“I actually served the last few pieces to Bruce. I’m sorry, Jason,” my mom apologizes. She frowns and looks down at hers and Bruce’s empty plates.

“That’s all right. I see there’s still five uneaten sausages on Y/N’s plate,” Jason says and smirks at me. He looks down at my plate and back up at me. “You’re not going to eat them, are you princess? Because if not, I want them.”

He’s fucking teasing me. Jason is mocking me with those green eyes and that fucking smile that wets every girl’s panties. It’s like he actually believes he’s going to get away with this. He really thinks he’s going to get what he wants. Jason slowly reaches a hand towards my plate to get my sausages.

I want to burst his cocky bubble in front of everyone.

“Actually...I’m going to give them to the dog. And by dog, I mean Ace,” I say, quickly grabbing all the sausages in my hand and feed them to Ace under the table. “You see, I don’t feed dirty dogs like you. Ace is a clean, loyal, and sweet dog. You on the other hand are a dirty, disgusting, slut who fucks anything with a hole.”

My sudden outburst startles everyone at the table. I see everyone’s wide eyes and open mouths hanging in shock at me.

Jason chuckles lowly. His eyes are full of anger and hatred for me. “What did you just say to me?” he asks.

“You heard me,” I reply with the same tone. “Unless you lost your hearing due to all the screaming from the banshee skank you brought home last night from only God knows where.”

“You know, you’re starting to sound like a jealous bitch. For someone who has claimed to hate me and not want anything to do with me on multiple occasions, you seem to be really obsessed about my sex life,”

“Oh please, don’t flatter yourself,”

“Y/N stop,” my mom says.

“You think I’m flattering myself?! I’m not the one who always checks myself out! You know, I always see you staring at me right?! If anything, you’re flattered by me!” Jason snaps.

“ENOUGH!!!” Bruce shouts.

We’re all silent but Jason and I continue to stare each other down.

“I’ve had enough of the two of you fighting! It’s old and it’s seriously ridiculous. It needs to end now. Your mother and I are going to leave for Spain tonight, and I don’t want to hear anything bad about the two of you while we’re gone. Now, apologize to each other,” Bruce says.

“Apologize to the princess? For what?! She’s a fucking bitch, who’s always bitching, and she’s basically the biggest bitch who ever bitched!” Jason yells. “She should apologize to me!”

“If I’m a fucking bitch then that makes you the biggest asshole here! You’re literally the most disgusting, disrespectful, lazy ass guy I have ever met! You have NO respect for anyone who lives here! Why should I fucking apologize to you?! All you do is drink, eat all the food, and bring random whores to our house and force us all to listen to you have sex!” I yell back.

“Our house? You think this is your house, too? I hate to burst your “bitching bubble” sweetheart, but this isn’t your house! You’re extra baggage that had to be dragged here! Your mom was wanted here; not you. As far as I’m concerned, you’re not even family!” Jason yells louder than before.

My bottom lip trembles uncontrollably. I feel tears running down my cheeks. I need to get out of here before I completely break down in front of Jason.

“You’re such a fucking asshole, Jason!” I choke out.

I quickly jump out of my seat and run up the stairs. After I slam my bedroom door, I throw myself down onto my bed and cry. I can even hear Bruce screaming his head off and tearing Jason a new one.

——————————————————————————

I wake up to an empty stomach. Rolling over onto my back, I rub my eyes and yawn. It’s dark in my bedroom; indicating it’s already nighttime. I reach for my cellphone on my nightstand and see it’s already eight o’clock.

I must have been really exhausted to have slept the day away. Those days usually happen after I cry a lot and feel like shit.

Mom and Bruce are probably already gone. Their Spain trip is only for the weekend. I’m seriously glad about that since I don’t know how I’m going to get through the weekend with Jason still around.

Maybe if I’m lucky he’s already at the bar and picking up skanks. That means I have time to eat and a few hours of silence for myself.

I decide to go downstairs and I instantly notice all the lights are off except for the kitchen light. Slowly stepping into the kitchen, I see it’s empty and that there’s a big box of pizza and two drinks; a bottle of beer and a glass of orange juice with the bottle of Vodka next to it.

Raising an eyebrow in question, I look around to see who did this. Noticing the back sliding door is open, I walk over slowly to peek out.

Jason.

On the phone and sitting at the patio table.

He doesn’t see me but I can hear him clearly.

“Do you think she’ll really like it?”

[craftypeaceturtle]

A is for Arrival...?

Summary: Remus and Janus are shopping ready for the new arrival for their family.

Note: The start of an AU and series because I’m just a sucker for any type of familiar sides. Romantic Demus and Royality.

Next Part: B is for Baby Time

.

“Hey Jay?” Remus suddenly stopped; his eyes enormous. 

“Yes, dear?” Janus put on a dramatic Victorian tone, his spine straightening with his hand frozen poised with the packet of washing up sponges. 

“Do we need to get birthday stuff?” Janus immediately scrunched his face, “No wait! Listen. You celebrate your kid’s birthday every year so surely you celebrate his first ever one ever. Right?”

Janus stared into the distance as he dropped the sponges on the floor, “Call your brother.”

“No,” Remus whined but still pulled up his phone and promptly shoved it into Janus’ chest, “He’ll only make fun of me if I ask it. If you ask it, then maybe he’ll presume he’s the stupid!”

“Did he celebrate Logan’s first ever ever birthday? What would you even call it? First day of existence?” Janus frowned as he speed dialled the number. 

“If he did, he didn’t invite me!” Remus shrugged before picking up the sponges. He immediately crowded into Janus and smooshed himself into his shoulder. 

They picked up on the second ring, Patton’s sigh answering. Something that they probably weren’t supposed to hear. “Hello Roman. We just have a quick question,” Janus chirped. 

“Hey Janus. It’s Patton by the way. Wow, another question, huh?” Patton, meanwhile, gave Roman a stern look and thrusted the phone at him again. Roman pulled a face as he shrugged and ducked back down behind the sofa. Frowning, he put it on speaker so they could both suffer, “What did you want to ask?”

“Should we celebrate our baby’s first ever day? Like a birthday but for their very very first birthday?” 

“What!” Roman shrieked before leaping back on to the sofa; ever so suddenly finding the strength to talk. 

“What do you mean ‘what’! God, he’s such a douche,” Remus muttered.

“I’m a douche, oh am I? Why would you celebrate a baby’s first ever day. It’s their first ever day in this world! They get overwhelmed and scared so easily. It’s a big scary world out there and you’re going to shove a party in their face! The baby is barely old enough to move it’s own hands! It’s a baby!” Roman complained while Patton giggled.

“To treat this seriously for a second, when you finally get your baby, the very last thing you want to do is mess around too much. After all this time, all that waiting, you finally get this tiny fragile baby. A tiny itty bitty baby. All you’ll want to do is just sit there and watch them quietly. A party is the last thing you’ll think to do. Heh, me and Roman even forgot to eat that day and only remembered hours later,” Patton spoke softly with his own memories uplifting his annoyance. Roman smiled and knocked their shoulders together. 

“...So is it worth buying like finger food in case we forget to eat?” Remus interrupted.

“Uh... yeah? I mean, yeah that would work,” Roman fumbled.

“Okay. Cheers. Bye!” Remus called out while Janus rolled his eyes, “Wow. We really need to get them something for putting up with all this.”

“Well I’m going to keep talking to them, you weirdo.” Janus ran his hand through Remus’ crazed curls but he was quickly shrugged off as Remus went to evaluate which bleach was best for their toilet, “How are you two?”

“Yeah, all’s good here! Just your typical day, what are you doing?” Patton chirped.

“Baby shopping mixed with some normal shopping. Extremely exciting, I’m sure you’re jealous,” Janus felt his voice go soft at just the mere mention of his coming baby.

“Aww! That’s so sweet,” Patton sighed, “I miss that so much about Logie. Baby clothes shopping is the only reason worth becoming a dad.”

“Oh Pat! Such slander, I’m impressed,” Janus laughed.

“Oh hush! Everyone knows that baby clothes are the best cutest things in existence. Aw, are you going to buy Halloween clothes! Me and Roman saw some adorable skeleton onesies today and I came this close to buying it for the baby.”

“Yeah, I think at this point we’ve bought him more Halloween clothes than normal baby stuff. That’s the whole reason we still have to do some shopping. There were these pumpkin shoes and socks. Oh Pat! I swear if I wasn’t so macho and cool, I would’ve cried. Baby shoes are just so tiny!” Remus raised a brow at his squealing voice. But then he also knew exactly what Janus was talking about just from his tone alone. Those shoes were actually pretty cute. 

“They are right! Aw, do you know any more about the baby?”

“Well...” Janus drawled while Remus took a breath. They agreed that Janus was going to deal with this breaking news.

“We met up with the mother yesterday.”

“Oh! My! Oh! Oh, Jayjay! That’s amazing! How was she?” Remus quickly snatched the phone and flicked it to speaker. Janus raised a brow at him but he was only met with the most mischievous smirk back. He frowned but turned back to continue talking only now with Patton’s voice squeaking out across the aisle. 

“She looked exhausted. I felt so bad for her. Meeting up for a coffee looked like the very last thing she wanted to do,” Remus said. 

“Bless her,” Janus sighed, “She was lovely.”

“Aw, that’s good. We never really got to meet our surrogate, how come yours wanted to meet?”

“Well, she apparently had a bit of a health scare. All is good! Everything is all good! But she just wanted to sit down with us and actually go through everything that happened. So we sat and talked about the health of the baby. Again, all is good obviously. But... so... we may or may not have found out our baby’s gender,” Janus winced once the squeal erupted over the phone. Remus cackled at the amount of people who turned to look at them with dirty looks before he turned the speaker off again. Ah, yes wouldn’t be a trip to the shops if Remus couldn’t spread some mild chaos. 

“What’s their gender!” Patton screamed before launching up from the sofa. Roman was giggling as Patton jumped up and down and spun him around. 

“We’re having a boy!” Janus smiled. He would deny the glow in his chest for this rest of his life but he couldn’t help but grab Remus’ hand. Remus smiled, thankfully, and squeezed his hand with his own lovesick smile. Their baby boy.

“Oh a boy!” Patton squealed high enough for dogs. 

“Typical, not one girl in this entire family,” Roman chuckled. 

“Oh congrats guys! When’s the due date again?” Patton sighed.

“10th of December. I almost feel bad for the boy. He’s going to have to put up with the whole Christmas birthday combination.”

“I’m still upset that he wasn’t a Halloween baby,” Remus frowned. 

They chatted for a few more minutes before Janus finally hung up. They were still holding hands- they would look exactly like a couple from a lovey film if they actually dressed like normal people rather than Disney villains. All they needed to do now grab was some more normal baby outfits. A very simple easy task. Just look at some clothes and chose some cute functional clothes.

But every single time... every single time, they would find the most abnormal baby outfits possible. That and they always spent a good ten solid minutes of staring at the tiny shoes. They looked like build-a-bear shoes. They didn’t even look real. 

“I can’t wait until he arrives,” Remus mumbled as he picked up a hideous orange dinosaur patterned jumper set. Janus tried to hide the smile but he quickly placed his head on his shoulder as they stood there. 

“Neither can I. He can’t come soon enough. Just like how you can’t put back that gross set soon enough.”

“You don’t like it! I think it’s cute.” Remus tilted his head as if that made it cuter. 

“He’s so not going to be an orange baby.”

“You don’t know that! Does he even need a colour?”

“You’ve got green, I like yellow. He also needs a colour. While we can still have control over what he wears at least,” Janus stated like Remus was a toddler trying to argue that the sky was green. 

“So we both have our ugly colours. Then he also needs an ugly colour too! Orange is a disgusting colour!” Remus thrusted the jumper in his face. 

“Oh totally exactly, dear,” Janus rolled his eyes before he then felt the passion erupt from him, “Okay. Firstly, for your information, yellow is a beautiful colour thank you very much. You’re the one that chose the grossest colour of green to embrace. He can have purple,” Janus winced as he guided Remus’ hand back down to the shelf. 

“Purple?” 

“Yes. A beautiful colour. Not only does it screw over superfluous ridiculous gender roles, it also is close enough to match our dress senses,” Janus stated with a proud look. Remus opened his mouth but then snapping it shut with a respectful nod. Yep, that sounded like a plan.  

They eventually found some normal tiny eeny weeny pair of jeans and they used all of their collective strength to stay clear of all the Halloween clothes and bought some presentable jumpers. Janus was finally starting to get fed up with standing around in a shop before he realised that Remus’ eyes kept flicking to a shelf behind them. 

He never made any move to actually go look at whatever it was and he never mentioned it. Janus found every reason to keep looking at the same pairs of stripey socks to give him time but he still said nothing. It was so uncommon that Remus felt shy about suggesting something. What could be the harm? “What you looking at?” Janus asked while exaggeratedly turning around.

“Um... I just noticed...” Remus drawled off. It was just a discount shelf. It was stacked with just random broken items that clearly no one ever take any interest in. Remus shyly sulked up to it and pushed aside the chipped mugs and torn notebooks without any hesitation. He pulled up a baby blanket. 

It was the exact same incredibly soft material all baby stuff was made from. The stuff where your hand magnetised to its softness. It was a quilted baby blanket in a pastel lilac. It was cute but it wouldn’t be on a discounted shelf without reason. There was a large smudge of black marker on its corner. But as Remus held it up, Janus laughed. It wasn’t quilted. It was sewn to be a spider web pattern around the blanket. Clearly an old Halloween gimmick. 

He turned to ask if Remus was all ready to go then and was immediately punched in the stomach. Remus was all teary eyed and awkwardly looking anywhere but him. His fingers brushed through the blanket over and over again. 

“Oh Reem,” Janus cooed and tugged the blanket from his grasp but he didn’t let go.

“I don’t even know why I’m tearing up!” Remus pressed his arms against his face. Janus felt himself tearing up as well. Something about how Remus’ voice would go all wobbly and pitchy when he was on the edge of tears just always got to him, “Just... oh this is so fucking stupid.”

“Well you’ve got us both crying in a shop at 9 in the morning. I’d say it sounds pretty dumb,” Janus smiled.

“Just... he could be our little spider. Just like how I’m your octopus and you’re my snake,” Remus’ voice was practically crumbling away. Janus felt a disgusting childish tear slip down his face.

“Oh Reem.” Janus hugged him, only so he didn’t have to experience the embarrassment of people seeing his husband’s gross taste in blankets of course. 

“How much spider stuff have we bought him! Like that would be perfect. And this is purple and spider!” Remus felt a tear escape his control too but he just buried his nose in Janus’ hair. 

“Oh you are such a nightmare of a husband. I’m taking you back to the husband shop and refunding you,” Janus groaned, he broke away and snatched the blanket from his grasp and shoved it into their trolley. At least it was cheap. Plus they would probably end up staining it with gross new born baby vomit anyway. 

[unmaskedagain]

Worse than the Devil

Hey Everyone, I got really inspired by the amazing response to my first fic Queen Of Mean. I decided to write a follow up. Its to Selena Gomez’s version of Cruella De Vil. I loved it when it first came out and it sent shivers when I realized it was perfect for my follow up.

Looking back the missing pigtails in the bluenette’s hair when she walked into class Monday morning, dressed like she just got off the runaway, flanked by Chloe at her side, should’ve been the first warning sign.

But in the class’s defense, it had been a crazy weekend. The fireworks that came with Ladybug’s video, Alya’s meltdown, and Lila being outted as a liar didn’t die down after class ended that day.  No. The weekend had been filled out a never-ending stream of group texts, complaining of hurt feelings, nasty little liars, and why, or why wasn’t Marinette replying to their texts? Answering her phone? Didn’t she know they were sorry? Didn’t she know they needed their everyday Ladybug now more than ever? Alya in particular.

Alya, who had spent the entire weekend, nearly 24/7, trying to save her blog; defend her life’s work against the avalanche of criticism that had come it’s way; even the most loyal fans screamed of betrayal. She had released a dozen video explaining what happened and begging her viewers to understand that people make mistakes. Calling Marinette with no answer, texting her best friend for help only to get no reply. Texting Marinette that Lila was a dirty, rotten, liar in over a hundred different way, in over a hundred different texts; only to never get a reply; which Alya never understood. Marinette was right. Lila was a liar. Alya and Marinette should be teaming up to bring her down like their brought down Chloe; stand together like best friends do.

As Alya sat patiently at her desk, with Nino holding her hand in support, waiting for Marinette to arrive so she could find comfort in her bestie, never once did an apology cross her mind. Alya was too indignant, too self-righteous, convinced the Ladybug was victim-blaming. It wasn’t Alya’s fault. Her boyfriend agreed. Her entire class agreed. She just knew, soon, all of Paris would agree.

           When Marinette casually strolled in, talking animatedly with Chloe about their week, she left the other students stunned. Gone was the pintails. Gone was the easy-going, simple, practically trademarked pink pants and grey flower decorated shirt. Gone was the happy smile that the students had always remembered was there to greet them and bring them cheer on a sour Monday, like the day was.

           Instead, Marinette’s hair was down and flowing down her shoulders, longer than they could ever remember it being (though granted they hadn’t paid much attention to their once friend in last few months, except for giving her a few quick glares and sneers) and was perfectly coiffed with strands pullback in braids that would’ve made Daenerys Targaryen take notes. She was dressed in all black; a cropped leather jacket, a sparkly black halter top that tied around her neck in a pretty bow, her jeans black and skin tight, and killer high heels that would make most girls envious. The only color Marinette wore was the sliver bracelets adorning her arms and the classic movie star red lips she sported. Marinette looked a supermodel.

           And if Marinette’s new look didn’t stunned them. Then the look on her face when she glanced at them sure did. Move over Hawkmoth, because if Marinette didn’t scare you, no evil thing could.

It was like the entire classroom went colder. Maybe it was because of the ice in Marinette’s stare, her curved red-stained smirk that screamed: beware. The way everything about her just screamed predator, alpha, top of the food chain. Queen.

           Alya blinked hard. Nino blinked hard. Adrien blinked hard. Too stunned at the sight to even remember to badger the bluenette.  She and Chloe, also dressed like a runaway model, flounced to the back of the class without a hello, a smile, a wave; anything friendly. It was like they were too insignificant for the girls to notice. If they had an ounce of luck still in their lives, that would’ve been so.

           Unfortunately for them that wasn’t the case.

           The girls were painfully aware of their existence; of every move they made over the week, every stupid text they sent, every false apology uttered. Because the downfall of the Ladyblog was just a taste of what was to come. At this point, Marinette and Chloe was just Spiders waiting for the kill.

“Girl, you don’t have to sit with Chloe,” Alya exclaimed.  “We’ll make room, right?” Nino nodded quickly, eager to give his childhood friend an olive branch.

“Why wouldn’t I want to sit with Chloe?” Marinette asked nonchalantly. “She’s my best friend.”

           What happened next was similar to what, Marinette, thought happened in movie; where the main character says something shocking at a dance, there’s a sound of a record scratch, and silence as all eyes turn to the speaker.

           The smirk the spread over Chloe’s face, the glow that filled her, the thought of the havoc she was about to help commence practically made her purr.

“Best friend?” Alix asked, her pink hair pulled back and her face skeptical. “Last I checked, you were mortal enemies.”

“Last time you check was not long after Lie-La came to class,” Marinette retorted.

“Which is the last time you’re opinion matter to us,” Chloe added. “Or well to Mari here. I never paid you peasant any mind.”

“You can’t be best friends,” Alya jumped up. “You shouldn’t even be friends. I can’t believe it? After what she did to you?”

           The other students nodded.

“She stole your design.” Rose put in.

“Bullied you for years,” Max said.

“Ruined your present for teach!” Kim added.

           Alya nodded smugly at the class backing her up, and gave Marinette a bright smile and an expectant look that always used to work on cowing the other girl.

“Bygones,” Marinette sighed. “I forgave her. And we bonded over how stupid you were at believing Lie-La.” Marinette leaned back in her seat. “Besides it’s not like she ever called me a jealous bitch? Told me to check my sources? Ditched me a million times. Whispered mean words about me right in front of me. And even crueler words behind my back. Chloe would never do that.”

“You know who would?” Chloe grinned. ‘You.” She pointed at Alya. “And you.” She pointed at Alix. “And you!” At Nino “And you, you, you, you. And well everyone here really.”

“Chloe maybe be mean; in fact the greatest mean girl Sharpay,” Marinette smiled lovingly at the blond who preened at the praise.

“But at least I’m not a bad friend,” Chloe snipped viciously.

“Now Chloe that would imply I’m still friends with them at all.”

           At the statement, students wilted into themselves. Their misdeeds weighed heavily on them. They had been so upset at Lila for lying to them, at themselves for believing her, kicking themselves for not listening to Marinette, they never once considered how Marinette felt about the whole mess. But now they knew, she wasn’t happy.

           Little did they know just how furious the once sweet girl was.

           The two girls turned their attention to each other.

“Wasn’t this week just amaz!” Chloe said easily. “Fashion shows are always just so spectacular.”

“Your mom is, like, the best,” Marinette nodded eagerly. “I still can’t believe we got to model.”

           Chloe side-eyed the students, pretending they weren’t listening. “And why not? They were short. And just look at us. We’re beautiful. We deserved to be on that runway.”

“Runaway?” Mylène asked, awed. “You were in a fashion show.”

           Marinette nodded, kindly, though inwardly smirking. “There are pictures from the show online. They’re trending.” So was Marinette’s social media accounts. “We got to model with Kate Upton and Bella and Gigi Hadid.”

“We’re all the rage!” Chloe stated. “Mommy’s thinking of making us the faces of her new line. We’ll be in next week’s issue of Teen Vogue.”

“I posted a few photos on my Insta,” Marinette shrugged. “You can look if you want, I guess.” It was said with a faux unsure, insecure, unassuming voice; a voice that even the most terrifying vampire bat could have even the smartest of victims dancing to it.

           With that the girls went back to their conversation. Pretending they didn’t notice their classmates whipping out their phones to verify.

“WOW,” Rose beamed. “They do have pics with the Hadid sisters. Oh you look so pretty Marinette.”

“Dude is that Kendall Jenner?” Kim asked.

“Beyoncé!” Alya yelled. “Beyoncé was there. You met Beyoncé.”

“Chill,” Chloe snapped. “We didn’t meet her. We just waved. Jay-Z was there too btw.”

“Jay-Z,” Nino whispered in awe.

Before befriending Marinette, Chloe was have gladly lied and said they met the goddess, that was Queen Beyoncé. But Marinette wouldn't suffer liars. And hated anyone who lied about her. Chloe was smart enough to know losing Marinette as a friend would be costly to her; both personally and professionally.

           The blond refused to toss away the blessing that was Marinette’s friendship. Not the like fools before her. They didn’t know what they lost. But Chloe would make sure they did.

           It had taken weeks of slowly inching her way to being Marinette’s friend. The girl had been untrusting the blonde’s actions at first. But eventually, Chloe won her over, proved she could be a good friend, if not the best friend Marinette ever had.

           And the best part? Chloe didn’t have to change. Granted she had to dull unsavory traits like lying and stealing but it was worth it.

“Tony. Stark.” Max gulped like he was just told Santa was in fact real. “You are in a picture with Tony Stark; Iron Man.”

“Pepper Potts wanted a vacation,” Marinette said. “Peter, their son, is a friend of mine. We met last summer when he was visiting England with his class. I was there with my grandma. We hit it off. He knew I was nervous about going on stage so he got his mom to come here so he could support me. It was just supposed to be the two of them. Until Mr. Tony realized and followed along. Swore up and down they were trying to ditch him,” Marinette laughed.

“Oh please,” Chloe huffed. “He was proud that his kid was hanging out with a gorgeous French model.”

“Two gorgeous French models,” Marinette corrected. “The three of us got ice cream afterwards, remember? I can’t wait for this summer. Peter said we can spend of three weeks at Stark Tower; interning. PR for you. You’ll be amazing at it. God knows I could do, though.” She said glumly. Though her internship was going to be assisting the Pepper Potts on her day to day life.

“Ridiculous!” Chloe snapped. “Utterly Ridiculous. You know you can’t wait to get your hands on Thor’s cape to find out what material Alien princes use. Not to mention the plans I saw for a potential Captain America supersuit.”

Marinette crossed her arms, and huffed. “Hey that man is walking around dressed like America’s drunk prom date. Someone has to step in.”

“It’s a classic look,” Nathanial told them.

“It’s a crime against fashion,” Marinette hissed.

           With that, the girls went back to talking about their weekend and bickering over summer plans. Or at least they tried to.

“You could’ve invited us,” Alya snapped. “Or at least told us.”

“Why?” Marinette asked. “We’re not friends. Why don’t you ask Lila how it was? I’m sure, she’ll happily spin you a yarn about how amazing everything was. And promise you’ll meet them next time.”

           It was like a slap to the face. The entire class quieted back down; wishing the bell would ring already. And wondering where Miss Bustier was.

           Unfortunately for the teacher, quite a few concerned parents and staff members had taken issue with how Bustier had been running her class. Bullying, students being constantly turned into Akumas, why Lila could miss so much school without it being a major issue.

“Don’t you think you’re being harsh?” Adrien asked. “They’re sorry.”

No, Marinette thought darkly. They weren’t. Not yet. But they would be soon.

“Okay,” Marinette shrugged, carelessly, inhumanly. “I don’t see why that matters. I accept their apology but it changes nothing. Sorry doesn’t fix anything. It doesn’t magically make every alright again. It’s no Ladybug charm. Let it go.” She warned.

           While Marinette did have plans to bring down Adrien, they were for a later time. And when she did, it would be painful. And it would break him. Like he helped break her.

           For months Adrien had stood by, remained silent as Marinette was made into an outcast, bullied, lost all her friends… when he knew. Knew Lila was lying, knew Marinette was just trying to help. After he promised, vowed to have her back. Instead, Adrien let them deface her sketchbook after Lila accuse Marinette of yet another bullying incident; destroying all of Marinette’s hard work. Despite knowing Marinette couldn’t have possible done what Lila said she had. He just let it happen, too afraid to stand up and tell the truth.

           Adrien didn’t take the hint. Or didn’t recognize a warning when he heard it.

“Their hurting too!” The blond boy defended, outraged at how his everyday Ladybug

“How?” Marinette asked curiously, innocently reminiscent of the girl who had been their friend who had existed when the world was still a wholesome place. “You said it yourself it’s not like Lila was hurting anybody. At least that’s what you told me, remember? You knew Lila was lying since like forever and you’re just fine.”

           It went silent again. Adrien paled. Marinette could barely stop the smile from slipping onto her face. If she wasn’t careful, they might combined their collective ten brain cells and catch on. See that she was a monster that should’ve never been released.

“You knew?” Nino asked in horrified disbelief.

           Dozens of hurt filled eyes trained on Adrien. It was at that moment Ms. Mendeleiev walked into class. “Students, I’ll be filling in today and possibly for the rest of the week. Everyone in their seats. Class is about to begin.”

           It was the smoothest devastation Chloe had ever witnessed and grew up with her mother and Gabriel Agreste as role models.

           In few years, the blonde knew there would be few would who hesitate to call Marinette, or herself, the devil. Too stunned to realize just how much worse either girl was.

           Chloe glanced at the girl who had become her best friend, and fellow mean-girl-in-arms. Marinette had her bluebell eyes trained on the chaos she had just unleashed, once again, on her fellow classmates.

           A lessor man, woman would’ve shivered. Chloe had shivered and had nightmares the first time that gaze rested on her.

           However, when time wore off the shock; Chloe realize she’d only see those type of eyes watching from underneath a rock.

           If you weren’t scared of the New Marinette, then you hadn’t met her yet.

Look out world, Chloe thought. Long Live the Queen.

[bluebellhairpin]

Our Saving Gra(v)e

Knock-Off!Avengers X Fem!Reader

A/N: Thanks Steve, look at what the Avengers turned out looking like without you. - Nemo

Warning(s): Giant Snake incarnate. Morgan Stark is older now. 

Summary: A Black Widow replica, a giant snake, a alien with daddy issues, a Hydra experiment, an Engineer, and a sniper extraordinaire walk into the Avengers Building. Sounds like the start of a bad joke, I bet you’re waiting for the punch line, right? But in reality... It is a bit of a joke. 

Masterlist   

“My Uncle is gonna kill me.”

“Your uncle? What about my brother!” 

“Your brother’s on another planet. He won't even know. Thor however - He just knows when I’ve messed up. Remember last time?” 

(y/n) looked between the two, not really bothered by the exchange. After all, destroying another garage they used as a ‘home base’ and conversations like these were normal. For them. 

“There was no ‘last time’.” She said, standing from her place leaning against her bike. “You’ve never met Thor in your life - uncle or not.” 

No matter what happened, Jormungand was always on to exaggerate - a trait gained from none other than his father, and a trait (y/n) loved to point out. Loki was an awful load of dramatic, and seething with the good old white lie - not to mention his gaggle of mismatched children that no one ever talked about. The latter was something Jormungand didn’t like about his father - more like the only thing he didn’t like.

Zulauang however didn’t like his father at all, and in turn any others of his family - which led him to being on Earth instead of his home planet, and only surviving because of Jormangard’s illusion skills to make him seem three-feet shorter and less purple that what he actually was.

(y/n) - she was the peacekeeper. Despite her violent background and origins, she was always seeking to use her words rather than her fists - especially when it came to an enormous snake and a nine-foot giant. 

A car rolled up behind them, pristine, and shining back a glossy black in the darkness of the night. From the driver's seat stepped a young man. He had the build of a weathered soldier, dark blue eyes, and slightly curly hair. Many swooned at him, and it was no wonder - he was all the best bits of three of the best World War II fighters

“Are we getting a tumble again?” he asked, looking up at the undisguised giant.

“Alex, you know he started it.” Zulauang said, pouting slightly and sending a dirty look at the snake incarnate. “He always does.”  

“You’re such a baby Zula.” Another voice came from the nearby tree - unaffected by the same event that took the garage. The inhabitant of the tree - Jay - enjoyed the birds-eye view of situations, and always seemed to know what was happening next. Hence why they slowly started moving down out of the tree before anymore words were spoken. 

(y/n)'s phone started buzzing from in her pocket, and she wasn’t too surprised to see the last and sixth member of their little group calling in to join the conversation - Charlie always had good timing. 

“Hey hey, Proxy!” Her cheerful voice rang through the otherwise silent space, and Zulauang went out of his way to appear in the camera of the screen to wave at her. “Hello Zula.” 

“So what’s ‘hanging’ Charlie?” Alex said trying to use 'cool words', but only succeeding in making Jormungand snicker from across the space. Alex ignored him. “Found a new place already?”

“I did. Made some calls. Had some calls. You’ll never guess where I got us.”

“The White House?” Jay suggested, seeming to appear at (y/n)’s elbow. They were always like that. 

“What, that quickly?” Charlie mimicked Jormungand’s snicker at Zulauang’s unsure words, rolling her eyes through the screen.

“Yes. I’ll send you through the coordinates and meet you there.” 

----------

“This so not the place.” 

“Oh, sure it isn’t. You really don’t trust Charlie that much?” Jormungand looked over at (y/n), unimpressed.

"I'm just not overly fond of what this building holds." Alex spared Jormungand a glace through the rear-view mirror before continuing to drive through the opened gates of the Avengers Compound. 

“You don’t even know if Thor is here.” Beside Alex she shook her head, “You need to stop being so petty.” 

“And to move over, you’re squishing me.” Jay’s voice piped up from the backseat, a slap sounded, Jormungand letting out a yelp followed.

“Hey, that hurt you little-”

“-Oh look! We’re here!” Alex slammed on the breaks, another ruckus erupting from the backseat, as (y/n) braced herself against the dashboard.

“At least give me a warning first.” she mumbled to Alex, adjusting her clothes before stepping out, the rebuilt and majorly up-graded Avengers Headquarters standing in its full glory. All for them. 

“Alex drives like an old man.” Zulauang said, running up behind the parked car with a puff. “And I don’t see why I couldn’t have gone with you.”

“I do.” Jay said, now almost on top of the car’s roof - ignoring Alex and his whines about them getting marks on his precious ride. 

“Yeah, you’d be too big.” Jormungand laughed, dramatically doubling-over in laughter at the thought. Before Zulauang could get a protest out, Charlie stepped out the front door of the Compound, flanked by two people (y/n) just managed to recognize.

“Hey guys! Good trip?” Charlie asked, then gesturing to the two with her, not bothering for an answer, “Good. This is Bucky Barnes - James for those here that aren't Alex - and this is Morgan Stark. Tony’s daughter.” 

Morgan grew up well - she looked a lot more like her father compared to her mother, but her big brown eyes and hair that almost matched Tony’s might’ve just been throwing everyone off.

Bucky - or James as Charlie thought he should be called - didn’t look a couple years older than the memorials in the museums showed him as from all those years ago - an effect from the serum, surely. 

“Bucky is fine, Charlie.” the man said, stepping forwards to properly greet the new group. “We - the Avengers - have been keeping pretty close tabs on you lot, especially those of you who aren’t native to earth -”

“I knew it.” Jormugand was getting lots of looks today.

“- and we’ve wanted you to come here for a while, and haven’t had the opportunity to catch you at a good time. So I’m here - with Miss. Morgan - to show you around your new home.” Bucky said, sending a slightly wider smile at his almost-son. 

“So does that mean we’re Avengers?” Jay asked, now off Alex’s car and standing lightly on their toes.

“Add ‘In-Training’ onto the end of that sentence and your answer is a definitive yes.”

[polygamyff]

26. Part 2

Touching Maurice’ shoulder, I am in awe with him. He won’t put reign down now, just watching him rocking her in his arms as he spoke to Shawn, I have never seen him so happy. Just smiling, he is so full of joy “so where were you Shawn?” I asked, I didn’t catch where he ended up “I was in New York, I was helping Maurice with the Promo he was supposed to set out in New York, I didn’t say because I was like what is the point. He was ok and I know he will be thinking about the business, sorry I ditched you all. Did you find Malik?” I paused thinking, Maurice doesn’t really know “he’s here, in bed all that time” Maurice looked over at me “he’s in bed? Can’t even see me, lazy ass” now it makes him look bad “we will talk after” I said to Maurice, looking down at Reign in Maurice’ arms she is fully awake and so content, moving in front of Maurice “you happy to be back in daddy’ arms? Look at you” Reign looked at me “you happy now baby?” Her upper lip curled up, this makes me so emotional, she has both of us back “she happy ain’t she?” I can’t believe she is not crying for milk “she is Maurice, she needed you as much as I did” my daughter is funny, she is laying in his arm like it’s comfortable hammock, you can tell the difference in him he is very much confident with picking her and holding her up with one arm “how was New York? I miss is it in a weird way?” he won’t be going there any time soon “it’s good, everyone is so worried. They was on the edge, I arrived and they kept asking, is he ok. They sent flowers here, they in the hall. They actually love you, I goes what about Marquis, and the office was like so about Maurice. I didn’t really know your ideas or where your head was at for promoting this hotel, I hired Drake. We are sponsoring some show, I forgot now. Also Power 105.1 we putting out an advert, like a competition to win open night tickets, five night stay, flights and spending money. I also was reading, there is already been bookings like all of the suites are sold, like not based on family taking it up. It’s New Year too, people want to be there. Biggest building, spectators. It’s like New York hotel, it is selling anyways” pulling a face “does that mean we have to spend Christmas there?” I need to know that question “well yes, I mean we could spend it here but I think I want to be there. We will discuss after” Maurice said to me “let’s eat! Come” my mom waving us over.

Maurice will not leave Reign alone, she has officially fallen asleep. I gave up my food to feed her “you like her dress though? It’s a little big but it’s to impress you” rubbing her back “I am impressed, she looks so pretty. She looks drunk on milk though, why you do that to her? She was happy in my arms” a little bit of sick came out “she needs to sleep Maurice, trust me. She will be awake for you later” laying her back down, wiping Reign’ mouth with the towel “motherhood looks good on you though” Maurice complimented me, I grinned looking down at Reign “you blushing” side eyeing Maurice “no” placing Reign towel on the table, Maurice placed his arm behind me “you sure about that” I shrugged “why do you have to be annoying and point that out, just eat” let me side track him “I have ate, I ain’t no fat nigga no more. I am skinny” I snorted laughing “we know” I giggled “what do you mean we know? What is that supposed to mean?” looking over at my mom “my mom said that I am not used to seeing a man with muscles, she was talking about Jay” Maurice gasped “wow Terry, that really hurt my feelings” my mom mean mugged me “I was just pointing it out, but do you like my food?” look at her, she is changing the subject.

I cooed out, they bough Maurice a cake “awww y’all, this is so sweet” I didn’t know they was getting him cake “you all making me so emotional” Maurice said placing his hand over his heart “seriously, wow. Thank you, it’s the little things in life. Like this, I have had everything. I won’t front, I had it all. But it’s things like this that make me happy. I stared death in the face, I was gone. I drifted off to sleep and that was it. Being here is so surreal, it makes me want to cry now. Thank you all for being here, even my brother and mom. They not here but thank you all for caring, I also want to thank Robyn. Baby you gave me life, I appreciate you so much. The love you have for me, I don’t deserve Robyn. You didn’t deserve everything you got, I wish I wasn’t like this. I wish I was never married because you deserve someone pure because that is what you are, you are pure. I am so tainted but you’re there always there, shining like an angel. I don’t deserve you at all, for what you did, for what you gave me. I don’t deserve you” biting on my top lip, I don’t want to cry. Maurice put his head down “I appreciate you all, got me emotional” Maurice hugged me “that was so sweet, baby you deserve me” he does and he needs to know this.

Maurice broke off some of his cake and held it out to me “eat some?” shaking my head “you eat it” I need to stop staring at him, everytime he catches me he offers me something. I am just in awe that my man is here in front of me “come on, let me feed you” Shawn laughed “you’re supposed to do this on your wedding day, you both cute” Maurice is really making me go shy, he edged the cake near my face “it’s nice, come on” rolling my eyes “a little bit ok? That is too big by the way” bringing my head forward and biting a bit, Maurice’ mouth fell open just watching me “lick my fingers clean then” he pushed the whole thing in my mouth, moving back placing my hand over my mouth. He is such an asshole “seriously!?” I said with a mouthful “you two, anyways. We are going home now” my mother announced, Maurice is so stupid “let me walk you out mother in law” side eyeing Maurice as he walked behind my mom, swallowing the cake down. That was actually a nice cake “I can’t wait for you to both marry, girl. I want you to be my sister in law” Nalah pointed at me “it’s nice to have a sister that I can talk too” that is so sweet to hear from Nalah.

Opening the door ever so slowly, nobody had checked on Malik and I feel like I should but I hope he is decent and not naked, I do not want to see anything “what you doing?” I jumped at Maurice’ voice “my god!” I spat, he scared my life “just asking, what are you doing? That is Malik’ room?” closing the door “I am not trying to sneak in your brother’ room and trying something you know” Maurice is so suspicious “well I am just asking what are you doing?” he is so silly “I am checking on him, we lost Malik. The moment you was awake he ran, he was outside the gates at the home drunk. He cried to me and gave me the drugs he said he didn’t take, I didn’t want you to know because I didn’t want you to know” Maurice’ eyes shot open, he looks angry “no, wait!” I placed my hand on his chest “you leave him, just check if he is ok. Let him sleep, Maurice this is not his fault. Your father blamed him, he wants to be loved. Please just don’t, just look and see he is sleeping” Maurice is angry but he shouldn’t be “I got that nigga clean” Maurice walked by me to check on him, I hope he doesn’t wake him or shout.

I told Maurice that Reign would be awake and she is, he is doing god knows what in Malik’ room. He’s been a while anyways “I can’t believe how much hair you have baby girl, I love this one piece though. You look so cute” I am going to hopefully be able to settle her enough so she sleeps in her crib, hearing the door close. Looking up from the bed “what did you do now? I hope you wasn’t mean to him” picking up Reign’ dress from the bed, she will wear this again “we just spoke, I said I love him and that we will talk tomorrow. I didn’t do anything bad, but I want her. Is she ready?” picking up the dirty diaper bag “she is, she is here. Please don’t make her all hype, she needs feeding but I think she wants some play time” walking off as Maurice made his way to her “first night baby girl, you got me. I am going to be put you to sleep, oh wow. You have beautiful hair, you is perfect girl!” my smile grew, I am so happy he is back.

Maurice is so in love with Reign, he just keeps on talking so much. I got to do my things, she ain’t crying so it’s ok “I think she is getting annoyed now, she want some breast milk? You want some breast? I want some breast too” he is funny “if only you could feed her” climbing up on the bed “you know how hard it is for me to pee? It’s a mission, I am still healing. I never get the chance to rest but I do now” sitting next to Maurice on the bed “I am sorry, I know that is my fault” least he knows it, Reign is just staring at Maurice so intently, she seems amazed by him “Reign, baby girl. You happy with daddy being here” her eyes looked my way but looked away “oh no, Robyn. You ruined it” Reign’ face scrunched up “good, now you can see she cries” Reign let out the loudest cry “wow Reign, sell me out like this. I thought we got along” picking Reign out of his arms “daddy just wants some love, she is such a diva. She is just doing it for milk” kissing her face even though she is crying.

Why do I feel like this, like it’s my wedding night. Maurice is tucking Reign in so I let him but then it’s just me and him, god I wish I could have sex right now “did you take your medication right?” shuffling down in bed, I groaned out at the feel of the silk covers “I have missed this bed “yeah I did, I am good. I ain’t forgetting” laying on my side “keep your boxers on, you are getting up at night” he can do it, I don’t care “mhmmm fine” Maurice got into bed “handsome, why did you say about not deserving me? I don’t think that because you do deserve me, all of me” Maurice pulled the covers over us both “I don’t though do I? I don’t deserve, you are so pure” He held me close, to feel his touch against me is making me tingle, he rested his face against the crook of my neck. Breathing her in heavily, I giggled “I can’t believe I am in bed for twelve, this is new to me but I am just going to sleep like a baby with you” our eyes locked, lacing my fingers around his neck. Pressing my lips against his, long and hard, just greedy for him. Moving my head back, pecking his lips with kisses “I love you Bonita” my smile grew “I love you too, you can’t ever leave me” Maurice shook his head “never will” Maurice kissed me.

[hellagayweird0]

Jay’s Season 14 Episode 3 Chat

(Read more will be included)

~ SAMMY AND SAMMY BEARD 😍

~ “Some people say I look good.” YES AND YOU DO, BABY

~ “No.  No, Sam.  No people say that.” Dean I stg don’t you dare insult the Sammy beard, I will hurt you.  SAM LOOKS GREAT

~ “Michael bailed.”  The fandom:

~ Ok camera hi um I like his face but I don’t need to see it so close, thanks

~ Chief is now and forever going to be a nickname I use for Sam in my fics, thank you very much.  I LOVE CHIEF

~ Jack: “Dean?”  Dean: *starts singing* “I heard that you were talking shit and you didn’t think that I would hear it.” *But seriously, that part of the song just automatically started playing in my head when they saw each other 😂*

~ “Is it really you?” Jack noooooooooooo it’s a liiiiiiie

~ Dean and Cas: *smile at each other*  Me: 

~ EXCUSE ME WRITERS WHAT IS THIS BULLSHIT “Dean and Cas don’t hug” THING I NEED ANSWERS I WILL FULL ON RIOT I’M MAD

~ “How’s Nick.”  *crawls into a corner* We don’t mention that name in this household, sir.  He’s not welcome here

~ There are so many layers to suits, damn

~ NEW SCAR, FRIENDS.  TIME TO RESEARCH

~ “Cas, I’m gonna need you to get in my head.”  All the Destiel shippers: 

~ Oh that’s a Dark Kaia and a stabby stab

~ WHAT WAS THAT DRAMATIC ZOOM OUT, CAMERA PERSON?

~ *screams* JODYYYYYYYYYYY I’VE MISSED YOU, MOM

~ Hey Claire my wife, what’s up I miss you

~ Aw Jody happy to hear from her son again

~ OH OKAAAAAY, HOLD ON *pulls out a chair for the writers* SIT DOWN AND LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT.  YOU’RE TELLING ME THAT YOU CAN BRING DARK KAIA BACK TO THE SHOW AND INCLUDE HER IN STUFF BUT YOU CAN’T DO ANYTHING ABOUT WAYWARD?  ALRIGHT, COOL, JUST WANTED TO CLEAR SOME THINGS UP (Can you tell I’m totally over this 😆)

~ Oh I’m glad the “giant meat fork” thing has context now 😆

~ AW JACK *hugs him*

~ Dean you can’t come back and just start giving Jack orders.  You aren’t the parent here

~ LOOK WHAT YOU’VE DONE, DEAN.  NOW BABY CHILD IS ALL SAD

~ “I didn’t mean to be a dick.” *coughs and remembers last season* Sure, Jan

~ (Also ok I get he’s been through a lot and I’m being hard on him BUT I CAN’T HELP IT)

~ Oh hi new people, you’re both adorable and I already love you

~ Ok nope I’m calling so much bullshit here.  You’re telling me that Dean literally cutting Sam off to insist that Cas stay in the bunker and not go with them to help, even though Cas could be a huge help to them, is normal Dean?  He seems waaaaay too eager to have Cas not go with them.  I don’t trust that AT ALL

~ See, Dean and I handle hard times/pain the same way.  By joking, not taking it 100% seriously, and sometimes flat out ignoring/avoiding it.  Not for bad, insulting reasons.  Just because it’s easier to joke than to face stuff.  (Sorry, this took a dark turn 😆 I just wanted to say that.  I relate to Dean a ton.)

~ NOT A SLIGHT B.M. SCENE MY HEART CAN’T TAKE IT

~ AW MAMA JODY HUGS

~ HAHA SEE DEAN, JODY LIKES IT TOO

~ I love the looks they give each other when Jody’s not looking 😆 little things like that make a scene so much better

~ Dean wtf is going on with you, you’re so eager about this, I don’t trust that

~ JACK HEY NOOOO *grabs him by his jacket* PUT THAT STUFF BACK YOU AREN’T RUNNING AWAY GET BACK HERE YOUNG MAN

~HE WROTE THEM A NOTE I’M CRYING (also 2 things.  one, who taught him how to write?  two, HIS HANDWRITING IS AWESOME.)

~ “Like Sleeping Beauty.”  *starts sobbing* Jack, could you be anymore pure?  ALSO WHO TAUGHT HIM ABOUT SLEEPING BEAUTY BECAUSE I WANT TO GIVE THEM A GIANT HUG.  THANK YOU, STRANGER

~ Oh thanks for mentioning Rowena.  I miss my favorite witch

~ “Are you going somewhere?” Cas parent mode is activated YES CAS BE A GOOD DAD I LOVE YOU

~ Jody, you don’t even have to ask, of course you get a vote, you queen

~ Sam is like “Nope this is some bullshit.”

~ AGAIN, CAMERA PERSON, I DON’T NEED HIS FACE THIS CLOSE, CAN YOU FOR THE LOVE OF CHUCK BACK UP?

~ *sings* SUPER MONSTEEEEEEERS

~ DEAN FUCKIN TOUCHED A HOT TIN CAN AND HAD NO REACTION.  I’M SORRY, BUT WTF??  THIS ISN’T FULL DEAN AND I’M STILL. CALLING. BULLSHIT.

~ Oh hey Dark Kaia, my love

~ I love how Dean just casually lands on Sam

~ I LOVE WHEN DARK KAIA IS A NINJA (also what was that “throwing the spear, diving to it, grabbing it, and running off 😆 it was strange but cool.)

~ Ok but for real I’m super curious as to who this AU!Kaia is

~ “Let’s find her and ask.” Oh yeah, I’m sure you’ll have a nice, calm chat over some tea maybe

~ “It’s marked ‘gross stuff’.” Could I love this show anymore than I already do?  The answer is no

~ AWWW JACK JUST SITTING WITH THE GIRL *screeches*

~ “Is that your dad?” “One of them, yes.” If you’ll excuse me, I have to wrap myself in a blanket and sob into a pillow

~ JACK IS SUCH A GOOD LISTENER LOOK AT HIM BEING CUTE

~ Oh that glance, the pressure is on, Cas

~ DEAN I SWEAR STOP GOING SO FAST WITH NO PLAN THIS IS HOW PEOPLE GET HURT HAVEN’T YOU LEARNED ANYTHING

~ Look at that floppy Sammy hair

~ Well isn’t that pretty and purple

~ Now let’s all take a second for dramatic timing to kick in- yup there it is

~ JACK CAN’T HELP HE LOOKS SO SAD NOOO

~ “First love strikes quick.” THEY MADE IT CANON, BITCHES!!  YEEEEEES *breaks out the whiskey* TIME TO CELEBRATE KAIAXCLAIRE

~ Oh Sam knows a little about losing love (I’m sorry I had to)

~ “He’s not ready for this case.” IN CASE YOU HAVEN’T NOTICED, HE’S NOT READY FOR MUCH OF ANYTHING, BABE

~ Dark Kaia jump scare, hi

~ THAT’S GOTTA BE SOME DIRTY WATER

~ Those crackers will dry out your mouth so quickly, my dear.  Take some dirty water with you

~ Here’s Deany

~ Oh well you’re welcome to tie me to a chair any day of the week, sir (i mean what....)

~ “I was trying to kill the blonde.”  Jody: *pulls out a gun* “I WON’T HESITATE, BITCH.”

~ DEAN BACK AWAY FROM MY DARK WIFE

~ Oh no the poor girl!!

~ JACK THIS ISN’T YOUR FAULT, CAS THIS ISN’T YOUR FAULT

~ NO MY TINY SON DON’T CRY PLEASE NO DON’T BE SAD

~ YES JACK SAVE HER YOU GOT THIS BABY

~ DEAN FUCKIN CHILL I SWEAR

~ In what world does a chair slide that easily?  Apparently this one

~ DEAN WTF STOP

~ JACK YOU’RE SUCH A SMART BOY

~ “You’re no different than him.  Threats, violence, anything to get what you want.” *starts clapping*

~ “I am nothing like him.” SURE JAN

~ “Jack, are you sure?”  “No.” *breaks it anyways* I love him

~ Heeeeey she’s okaaaaaay YOU DID IT JACK I’M SO PROUD OF YOU

~ Why do I miss Michael!Dean?  Is it bad that I want him back? 😆

~ Excuse me, don’t kick her

~ Aw Jody

~ Yay new friends coming to visit

~Guys, you didn’t even knock first.  Rude

~ SAM’S ANGRY FACE DOES THINGS TO ME THAT WE WON’T TALK ABOUT

~ “I was never one to turn down a buffet.” ME TOO

~ WHY DOES SAM ALWAYS GET THROWN ONTO TABLES 😆

~ Hi um don’t touch Sam’s beautiful face, thanks

~ GO JODY

~ GET AWAY FROM MY MOM

~ Wait wait wait, would a chair losing a leg really loosen the ropes?  HOW DOES THAT WORK, AM I MISSING SOMETHING HERE 😆

~ Dean: “Now you’re in trouble.” Dark Kaia: *dives out the window*  Dean: “Well shit, never mind.” 

~ NO JODY

~ YES DARK KAIA I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, YOU BADASS

~ I hope we meet again, wifey

~ Jody, you’re such a fuckin queen

~ Aw yeah, Claire deserves to know

~ “I just feel like I already lost before I ever even began.” Was that shade towards what happened (or rather, didn’t happen) with Wayward?  WAS THAT SHADE?  IF SO, I’M SO PROUD AND I BOW DOWN TO JODY

~ EXCUSE ME NO DON’T GIVE ME A SPLIT SECOND OF JODY CRYING I DON’T LIKE HER CRYING NO THAT’S NOT OKAY NOOOOO

~ Jack just lying on his bed, contemplating life, is meeeeeee

~ LIL JACK SMILE

~ I. FUCKIN. LOVE. CAS. AND. JACK. FATHER. AND. SON. MOMENTS.

~ I LOVE WHEN CAS IS PROUD OF HIS CHILD YES

~ Not gonna lie, I had to take like 5 minutes because I was crying over this scene BUT I NEED AN EPISODE WHERE CAS AND JACK GO ON A HUNT TOGETHER PLEASE AND THANK YOU

~ THE LIL SMILE IS BACK

~ Other parents are proud of first steps, first words, and stuff.  And the fandom is over here like AW HIS FIRST COLD HOW PRECIOUS 😆

~ “I’ll make you some soup then.” PLEASE HOLD AS I RESUME MY CRYING

~ NO I’M NOT READY FOR THIS B.M. SCENE, NOPE, NO *jumps out of the impala* *screams from the distance* NOOOOOOPE

~ “I put us all in danger today.  Stupid danger.” YEAH WE KNOW

~ As hard as it is, baby, you can’t skip like that.  You have to be careful.

~ Hey um Dean I don’t like this “putting yourself down” part *hugs him* stop it

~ Are we forgetting that both Sam and Dean have been possessed by archangels?  I’m sure Sam knows what it feels like (I’m not yelling at Dean 😆 I’m just saying)

~ Dean: “I was underwater.”  Me: *breaks out into singing All Of Me* MY HEAD’S UNDERWATER-”

~ NO CAMERA PEOPLE YOU ARE EVIL DON’T YOU DARE GIVE ME A SHOT OF SAM WITH TEARS IN HIS EYES WHO SAID THAT WAS ALLOWED

~ Okay, let’s pause for a second.  Dean, sweetheart, you said yes because Sam and Jack were in danger.  If you hadn’t, Jack would be dead and who knows what would’ve happened to Sam.  You did the right thing, and whatever Michael does/did, isn’t on you.  You had no control after he took over.  You said yes to him helping you save Sam and Jack.  You didn’t know he’d take over and start doing all this stuff.  Not. Your. Fault.  Alright, let’s resume

~ JACK, UM, THAT’S BLOOD.  JACK THAT’S FUCKIN BLOOD.  EXCUSE ME YOUNG MAN WHY ARE YOU COUGH BLEEDING?  THAT’S NOT OKAY IN THE SLIGHTEST.  YOU NEED TO TELL SOMEONE AND GET HELP, DON’T YOU DARE PULL A WINCHESTER AND JUST NOT SAY ANYTHING.  BABY BOY PLEASE IF ANYTHING HAPPENS TO YOU I’LL GO HUNTING FOR SOME WRITERS.  PLEASE DON’T DIE

~Also, I’m getting Sam S8 flashbacks and I don’t appreciate this

And that’s it for S14 E3!  This episode was the best one this season so far by a long shot.  It felt like the first real episode.  And for some reason, it felt really short.  But it was still good!  I’m really excited for next week’s episode!  Even though it’s a filler, it looks awesome! (even though Sam beard is gone....I’m not sad....*sniffs*)  And that mystery girl with Sam who I’ve been trying to figure out the identity of for so long is in it SO MAYBE I’LL FINALLY GET SOME ANSWERS.  She’s adorable.

[holylulusworld]

Masquerade

Summary: Believing your fiancée kisses you like never you give in to the heat he causes. What if there’s more hidden behind the mask he’s wearing?

Pairing: AU!Dean x Reader, Sam Winchester, OFC’s

Warnings: angst, language, wearing masks, semi-public sex,  sex against a wall, a hint of kidnapping, mentions of arrange marriage/breakup-ups

This is it...my 6.666 post...

Standing in the room full of people you look around, sniffling as your life will be controlled by the husband your father chooses for you. You never met this man before, still, your father insists he is the perfect partner for you. – Rather for your fathers’ business but who wants to argue about ‘true love’.

Snorting you glance at all the people behind masks. You know for sure all these men and women don’t need masks as they are wearing fake smiles every day.

It’s one of the huge masked balls your father likes to throw. You hate it, hate the greedy people entering such an event, hate you must be here instead of lying in the arms of the man you love.

For months you were sneaking out on your father, had an affair with a mere mechanic under your father's nose till he caught you red-handed as you talked to Dean on the phone.

Two days later Dean broke up with you, telling you it’s not right to take the money and your ‘good’ life away from you. That was four weeks ago, and nothing is like before.

You talked about running away, starting a new life and suddenly he cut you out of his life. He quit his job, changed his numbers and never contacted you again.

Love is a fairytale your father likes to say. Before Dean broke your heart you believed he’s a bad liar, now you know he’s right.

“Smile, act like you want to be here.” Your father insists and you nod, faking a smile. “Good girl. Don’t you worry, your fiancée is a nice man, with a reputation matching mine.”

“You mean a greedy monster…” You snarl through gritted teeth, breaking out of your father’s tight grip to run out of the room.

Taking your mask off you sink to the floor, silently sobbing as you will have to marry a man you don’t even know.

“Y/N…” A gruff voice tries to catch your attention and you wipe a few tears away as a tall man walks toward you. “Your father is looking for you. Isn’t it impolite to run away the moment he wants to introduce you to your future husband?”

“I just…” Choking out an apology you shake the man’s hand, giving him a cracked smile. ���Sorry. I needed fresh air. Sometimes life becomes…”

“I get it, Y/N. Let me introduce myself. I’m …” You place your finger onto his lips, and for a moment they feel like Dean’s, so you close your eyes when he cups your face. “No names?”

“Just for tonight. Can we pretend we are not the person we are?” Now his eyes lit up and he nods. You want to say more but then his plump lips press against yours and you feel a spark ignite.

“For tonight I’m whoever you want me to be, Y/N.” His voice close to your ear now, his hands placed onto your hips he whispers all the right things. “All you want me to do, I’ll do for you…”

“I want…”

----

The next thing you know is that your dress lies abandoned on the floor, just like your underwear. Brain mush, your body on fire you let the stranger you just met explore your body.

His lips travel down your collarbone as he holds you against the wall with strong arms. “Tell me what you want, Y/N…” That voice, so dark…deep…almost like Dean’s whispers against your skin as your legs tighten around him.

“Make me forget I lost him…please…” He moans against you, nipping at your soft skin to mark your body as his property. “Please…

“All you want…”

Shoulders, his broad shoulders feel like Dean’s, his lips caress your skin as your lover used to do and the way he sinks into you makes you cry out at the memory of the last time you made love.

“Can I…” Sniffling you hide your face in his neck. He’s still wearing his suit and the black mask. For a reason, it was his condition to make you feel good. “…call you Dean?”

“Do it, Baby…” His fingers dig deep into your flesh as he starts moving inside of you, making you cry out with every hard thrust. “Call my name…”

“Dean…please…oh please…” Not knowing how to stop the fire this man lit you lean against the wall, watching him work his length into you in a frenzy.

Underneath his expensive suit, you can see his muscles flex every time he pumps into you. “Say it again…call my name…” He urges you on and you’ve got no clue if your future husband is kinky or crazy, but you call Dean’s name, crying it into the empty room to let it echo through your father’s way too huge house.

“Please…I…” Gasping you wrap your arms around his neck, bringing him close to your body while he drives into you faster, harder, with so much force your vision blanks out for a moment before you whimper his name one last time.

“That’s it, Sweetheart. Did so well for me…” Grunting your name your stranger, rocks into you, thrusts four, five more times until his cum coats your walls. “Letting a stranger fuck you bare is dangerous, Baby Girl…”

Chuckling you rip the mask off Dean’s face to kiss him fiercely. “We should get out of here…”

“I know, couldn’t resist to have you right here, under his nose. Asshole.” Dean moans as you gyrate your hips, letting his dick twitch one last time. “Love you, Y/N.”

“I love you too, dirty boy. Now let’s get my stuff and…” Dean’s lips silence you and you slide your fingers through his hair, whimpering as he pulls out. “Wear what I got you.” Pointing at a bag Dean smirkd, licking his lips as you walk butt-naked toward the bag.

“Pervert…” Giggling you open the bag to dress in a different dress and mask to not draw anyone’s attention toward you.

“I could just kidnap you naked, but I don’t want the security to see your naked ass.” Grabbing your waist, he twirls you around laughing as you squeal.

“Let’s run…now…”

“Sammy got your stuff and waits for us outside the gate. We need to hurry, Sweetheart. I don’t want your father to shoot me for real…” Taking your hand Dean leads you out of the room and toward the front door.

Laughing you almost bump into an angry looking guy. “Excuse me. Have you seen Ms. Y/L/N, I’m her fiancée?” Cole asks and Dean needs to hold back a chuckle as you lie shamelessly.

“She was in the ballroom not moments ago, Sir. I bet she’s still with her father.” You coo as Cole's eyes you up and down, licking his lips.

“Thank you…”

“You’re welcome, Sir.” Dean grunts, slinging one arm around your shoulders. “We have to go, our babysitter called. Little Charlie is crying for his mommy.” Dean lies to get away from Cole.

----

“Where is my fiancée?” Looking at your father Cole squares his jaw, not wanting to wait any longer to lay claim on you.

“She must visit the restrooms, Cole. I’m sure she will be back soon.” Your father panics. Knowing you left the room over an hour ago he fears you went straight to your room to hide from your future husband. “I’m sure she will love to meet you.”

“I hope so, for your good,” Cole smirks, giving your father a cold glare as he can see the hesitation in his eyes. “If not your business could go downhill pretty fast.”

----

“Got her.” Dean pants as he runs toward the Impala while you hang over his shoulder, laughing like crazy as he insisted on ‘kidnapping’ you Winchester style.

“Dude!” Sam laughs, slapping Dean’s head as he helps you on your feet. “We should get the fuck out of here before her father realizes you kidnapped his daughter.”

“Right, I’ll drive, Baby shotgun. Sammy, backseat. We will start a new life somewhere far away from your shitty father.” While you sit next to Dean you smile as Sam explains he hacked your trust fond to transfer all your money to a new account.

“You are a genius, Samuel Winchester…” Squealing you give your friend a high-five as Dean slaps your ass.

“Safety belt, kiddos. Let’s roll…” Dean speeds off, smirking as a patrol car passes him by. “Do you think daddy is already missing you?”

“No jokes, Dean. Let’s get away from here as fast as possible. I want to become a dirty mechanics wife and have awful lot children with him…”

Dean smirks, wiggling his eyebrows as Sam groans in the backseat. “I love to make babies for sure.” Rubbing your belly Dean groans. “Soon you will be round with a Winchester, Sweetheart.”

“Dude, not when I’m around. Now take the next left and then the last exit to the right. This way we can avoid getting caught by cops. Can’t wait to see her reaction to the hideout we found.” Sam laughs as you glance over your shoulder.

“Hideout?”

“Uh, our grandfather was kinda crazy, sweetheart. He built a thing he called ‘the bunker’. It’s a bit underground but huge, safe and no one can enter it without a certain key. We can hide there till your father calms…” Pecking Dean’s cheek you imagine having a life with the man you love.

“I will live in your car if we have too, Baby. No matter where you go, Dean. I’ll go with you and your freaking tall brother…”

“Hey! I’m not that tall.” Sam smiles as he got a message from Jess. “Jess says she prepared food and a welcome home surprise for Y/N.”

“Your girlfriend is the best, Sammy.”

You lean your head against Dean’s shoulder, closing your eyes as he drives toward your shared future without your father and a husband you don’t love.

SPN Forever Tags

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@spnfamily-j2​, @supernatural-bellawinchester​, @butifulsoul125​, @lyinginthegingerlocks​, @deans-baby-momma​, @spn-dean-and-sam-winchester​, @20gayneen​, @janicho88​, @thefaithfulwriter​ @dreaminemz​, @negans-lucille-tblr​, @akshi8278​, @midnightsilver16830​, @mrspeacem1nusone​, @ria132love​, @caligraphee​, @the-witch-in-silence​, @multisuperfandom​, @deansgirl-1968​, @justanotherwinchester​, @jadesupernatural​, @squirrelnotsam​, @gaveherhearttotheliontattoo​, @roonyxx​, @jason-todd-squad​, @thevelvetseries​, @spnsuper17​, @adoptdontshoppets​, @woodworthti666​, @frederikkeborup​, @psychicforest​, @luciathewinchestergirl​, @michellemxndes​, @addictedtofictionalcharacters​, @gabifernandessn​, @magssteenkamp​

[redhoodieone]

Don’t Tell Me Part 2

A/N: Okay…here we go! This chapter answers the burning, dramatic questions like: How did Jason and Y/N realize they’re in love with each other? What was their first time “making love” like? And, now that they know they’re having a baby, what’s next for them?

 Warnings: Language, smut, baby making…etc…

  Y/N’s Point of View I know I’m in a lot of trouble. I’d be stupid to ignore that I haven’t had my period in two months. It’s going on three months now, and it’s only a matter of time before anyone suspects I’m pregnant. All I wear is loose blouses and t-shirts, and black yoga pants to slim my little bump that’s beginning to show. But lucky for me, no one’s said a word. I’m living in a house full vigilantes and detectives and not one of them as figured it out yet; not even Alfred (who knows absolutely everything about everyone.) Just thinking about being pregnant is frightening enough. I honestly never thought I would be a mother since my own mother had abandoned me as a teenager, and I had lived off on the streets until I got a job at Bat Burger and could afford to live in a cheap apartment nearby. My own father walked out on us, before my mother bailed with her new boyfriend to Atlantic City. Ever since then, I knew families were stupid and only for those who are blessed and do nothing wrong ever. I was never exactly innocent as a kid. My history is as sketchy and dirty as any other scum in Gotham. I stole a lot as a kid, since I never got to have new toys or products, since mother and I were lower than low class. I have stolen clothes, makeup, sneakers, and even food when I felt I deserved better. It did feel good to steal, but once I got home with all my “new” stuff. I felt guilty, and awful even. So, maybe this was a punishment for me. Maybe this is what was going to happen since everyone in my family had fucked up more than once. I deserved it all, and I still do. I’ve even gotten myself pregnant...with a guy I’ve been fucking behind my boyfriend’s back for over a year. And to top it off, it’s his brother’s child...who I’m secretly in love with. When did it happen? How did it happen? And why did it happen? Since I can feel safe and tell the truth in my head, I suppose it happened the right after Jason’s birthday, after Tim and I made it to our one year anniversary. Dick, Tim, and Damian decided throw Jason a surprise party at the Manor. Jason had been complaining he didn’t want to do anything for his birthday, and even threatened his brothers if they planned anything, he would shoot them in their kneecaps (I love that kind of threat he would make lol) and make sure they wouldn’t patrol for a year. But of course, the brothers threw Jason the biggest and outrageous surprise party. Many people went, including Clark Kent and Lois Lane, as well as Jason’s best friends Roy Harper, Kori, Artemis, and Bizarro. I heard it was the biggest party since Bruce’s birthday party. But unfortunately, I couldn’t make it to the party. Many employees at Bat Burger were suffering from stomach flus, and I had to fill in and work overtime, including long nights. I was really disappointed. I really wanted to go and meet the other superheroes I’ve never met but only heard of, but I wanted to keep my job. Tim was really disappointed, too. I heard from Barbara that he mostly hung around his brothers all night, because he really wanted me there. If anything, I assumed Tim, Alfred, Bruce, and Dick missed me a lot. Damian was probably glad I didn’t show up to hang all over Tim. But Jason missing me? No fucking way. Especially since I figured he would have hooked up with Artemis or some other bimbo I don’t know about. But from what I heard from everyone; the party was a success. The food, drinks, and music was amazing, and everyone partied until one in the morning, before Alfred shooed everyone away because he was exhausted after preparing for the party. I had just gotten home around 2 that same morning; sweaty, sleepy, and sick of smelling like Joker fries. After a struggle, I managed to take a shower, and climb into bed for at least 6 hours until it was time to go back to work. My eyes were closed. My breathing is calm. I could just fall asleep until... “You missed my party.” I open my eyes, and quickly sit up in shock to see Red Hood sitting on the window sill. Jason was in complete Red Hood costume, and the way his body was facing me seemed tense and anxious. “I’m sorry I didn’t go. I had to work. A lot of people are sick with the stomach flu,” I explained. “It would have been better if you were there, though,” Jason replied, his voice scrambler making his voice deeper and a little more frightening. “How? All your friends were there, right?” I asked. I wonder why Jason’s acting more stranger than usual. “I seriously doubt my presence would have changed anything.” “It would have, believe it or not. I see you as a close friend. It just...it would have been better if you were there,” Jason said, his voice sounding painful. He stands and turns to leave, but I find myself jumping off the bed to stop him. “Wait! Just wait a minute!” There I was in my short dark blue pajama shorts and white tank top, dressed for bed in this hot August night. Red Hood finally turns to face me, his white lenses take me by surprise. I force myself to look up at him, and hope he’s looking back at me. “Why are you so upset about me not being there for your birthday party? Didn’t you have fun with your family and friends? Didn’t you enjoy the food, drinks, cake, and music? Didn’t you love all your gifts, even though you’ll bitch about them later, and all the other fun memories you made tonight? Didn’t you get everything you wanted?” I asked, pleading for him to see his birthday party wasn’t all so bad. He raises his hands up to his helmet, and removes it. I’m now face to face with Jason Todd. I can see his sweat covered face with some of his dark hair matted to his forehead. His blueish, grey eyes full of life and mischief, and the strong jawline that defines his handsome masculine features. He’s breathing hard, and his body trembles a bit. The pupils in his eyes dilate, when they find mine. “No, no I didn’t get everything I wanted, Y/N...” Jason’s voice breaks; it shatters my heart to see him in so much pain and anger. “Because what I want will never be mine.” “What are you talking about?” I barely whisper. “What do you want, Jason?” “All I want is you, doll.” Our lips touch. It was like fireworks were shooting throughout my body, from my toes to my head. His lips against mine felt perfect; as if everything in our lives were just normal and peaceful. The second Jason opens his mouth to mine, we savagely allow our tongues to mingle and search through each other’s mouths as if this was our last time to ever kiss. Savoring each other’s taste. Savoring each other’s touch. Savoring each other’s heat. The moment has me weak. “I want you too, Jay...” I whisper softly. Jason pushes me down on the bed, and straddles me. He lifts up my tank top, and dives down to suck, lick, and bite my nipples. He massages my breast, as he whispers how he loves me braless. Our mouths find each other’s again, and I take the initiative to roll us over so I can straddle him. I miss this. I miss skin on skin contact. I miss the heat between two bodies. I slip out of my pajama shorts and panties, so I’m completely naked on Jason. He growls and runs his hands all over my body. I moan louder at every touch. “Fuck Y/N...you’re so fucking beautiful...” Jason groans. He removes his boots, pants, shirt, and jacket in no time. Only in his boxers, I straddle him once more and I begin to grind against his hard bulge. We swallow each other’s moans through our kisses, and I can feel myself staining his boxers with my juices. I start kissing and licking his neck and chest until Jason lifts my head up. “Stop...” Jason pants. The guilt in his eyes says it all. He wants this, but he remembers why he can’t exactly do this with me. “What about Tim?” Tim. My boyfriend Tim? “Oh my God...what am I doing?” I ask, panicking to the point where I climb off him and cover myself with my sheets. “How could I be doing this to him? He’s my boyfriend. He’s my sweet loving boyfriend, and I’m doing this to him.” “I know, I can’t believe what I’m doing, either. As much as I give Timbo shit a lot, this is probably the worst thing I could do, and I don’t think I could do it,” Jason admits as well. “Tim’s such a great guy. He’s a good guy. He’s a nice guy and here I am, practically throwing myself on his hot older brother because I haven’t had sex in a year, and I’m horny as fuck!” I cry out loud. Covering my teary eyes, I curse myself for being such a slut. “I’m such a goddamn slut...” Jason’s hands remove my own from my face. There are tears in his eyes, too, and I wonder why he’s crying. “If anyone is at fault...I’m guilty as well. I mean, fuck!” Jason snaps, and kicks his boots to the wall. He frowns, and wipes his tears. “What kind of a brother am I? What kind of brother falls in love with his little brother’s girlfriend? I’m not fucking saying I’m a saint, because I know I’m not and never will be one, but this has got to be the most evil thing I’ve ever done. Tim’s...a great guy. He...gave me a second chance and has always been there for me and look at me now, I’m sitting next to the most beautiful and kind woman I’ve ever met.” Jason then moves to the floor, and pushes himself between my legs. His face is full of sadness, hurt, and love... “You...never judged me. You know about every horrific, devastating, and evil thing I have done, and yet...you still became my friend,” Jason whispers, his voice cracking at the end. “Why? Tell me why, Y/N. Why do you still like me even when I’ve never and will never like myself?” The tears fall from my eyes. “Because you want to be a good person, and that’s just as good as already being a good person in the first place,” I whisper back. Our teary eyes stay on each other’s, until our lips slam against each other’s. Our moans sound pained, and our hands grip each other’s bodies, and we fall back onto the bed. The sheets are off me, and feeling Jason on top of me is making me breathe harder. I run my hands over his strong muscular arms, and chest; feeling every hard inch of him. Jason quickly gets out of his boxers, and I practically whine when his thick, hard cock rubs against my pussy. “How long has it been for you?” he whispers in my ear, before kissing my neck. “A-a year,” I choke out. “Fuck doll...why hasn’t he touched you like this or take you the way I want to take you right now?” “I-I don’t know. Maybe I’m not...” I moan against his two fingers slipping into my aching, wet pussy, while his thumb rubs against my clit. “Maybe I’m not good enough for him.” Jason stops his movements, and looks into my eyes. “Don’t ever say that again, Y/N. You’re so fucking perfect. You’re so kind to those who don’t deserve it. You’re funny, smart, and you sure know how to get a guy’s heart racing. You’re so perfect that I don’t even know how someone like me can be on top of you...wanting to make love you until you can’t scream or walk anymore. If anything, you deserve the best.” “You deserve the best, Jay,” I say truthfully. “Then so do you, Y/N.” “But Tim just doesn’t want sex-“ “Then you deserve someone who can pleasure you the way you can pleasure them,” Jason says softly, as he kisses me once more. “Do you trust me, Y/N?” “I do...” I moan against his lips. “More than anyone...” Jason then slips inside me; stretching me to the fullest and stalling when our breathing is heavy. There’s no foreplay, no teasing, and no patience. With one arm supporting himself near my head, the other rubs against my hips, as I begin to meet his thrusts halfway. My hair is spread all out on the pillow, and I imagine my lips are red and chapped from our kissing, but Jason just watches me with hooded eyes. “Jaybird...” I moan out. A grin takes over his face. “Fuck! I love it when you call me that!” he gasps out. I wrap my legs around his waist, and he begins to really pound into me. The way his cock is stroking my walls, he’s hitting a sensitive but sensational spot that I need to feel now more than ever. “Baby girl...you’re so fucking tight and wet. I-I wanna stay inside you all the fucking time now.” I take the initiative to kiss him; more passionately than before. One of my hands caresses his faces, as he other run along his scars and bruises on his chest and shoulders. Jason pulls away to release a long, needy moan. “Oh God, Y/N...you’re so good to me...” Jason whispers against my lips. “You deserve it, Jay,” I whisper back. “But you’re just...Fuck doll, you’re so fucking good to me,” Jason groans, kissing me again, as he starts thrusting harder, faster, and deeper in me. One of his hands moves down and begins to rub fast circles on my clit. “I wanna feel you cum all around me, baby girl. I wanna make you cum so hard.” With Jason’s thumb rubbing harder against my clit, and his thick delicious cock continuously hitting my g-spot, I begin to breathe harder and my pussy clenches and unclenches tightly around Jason’s cock. I throw my head back onto the pillow, revealing my neck and chest for Jason to kiss as I cum all over his cock. My orgasm is strong, and it makes me wrap my legs around his waist painfully. “Jay! Oh God! Fuck!!!!” I moan louder. “Fuck doll, y-you made a mess all over my cock,” Jason pants, and squeezes my my hips while his last few thrusts are harder and faster than before. “Next time, I-I’m gonna eat your pussy and lick your cum off until you’re begging me to fuck you again and again.” His thrusts come to a sudden stop, and he cums inside me. Jason moans my name, and a list of swear words. He groans heavily, and kisses me until we’re both out of breath. Once he pulls out of me, Jason pulls me beside him, and cuddles with me. Jason kisses my forehead, and nuzzles his face into my shoulder and neck. I kiss his shoulder, and he finally gives me a serious look I’ve never seen before. “No one can ever know about this, Y/N.” “I know, especially Tim,” I agree sadly. The guilt already eating me alive. “But it’s not the last time we’re doing this right?” Jason asks, his grip tightens around me. “I don’t want this to be the last time,” I confess. “I don’t want it to be the last time either,” Jason admits. My eyes lock into his. “Jay...the way I feel about you...” “Y/N...” Jason pauses, and takes a deep breath. “Whether you want to hear this or not, I-I have to say it out loud or it’s going to fucking eat me alive. I love you, Y/N.” The way Jason confessed his love for me makes my heart beat faster to where I can’t breathe or think. I feel the same way, and as guilty as I already am, I have to be honest, too. “I love you too, Jason. I love you so much,” I confess, and our lips touch again. And that’s when we betrayed Tim for the first time. And it wasn’t the last time, either. I close the bedroom door, and I lie down to rest. Tim is out on patrol with Bruce, Dick, and Damian; while I have informed them I’m down with the stomach flu and need to rest up. My hand rubs the little bump that will soon hold and protect the baby I’ll have soon. A gloved band moves to mine, and touches the bump as well. “It’s...mine,” Jason whispers. He knows, and he’s stating it as if I have forgotten. “I know,” I reply. “When will we tell him? Tell all of them?” “I don’t know...” I respond, unable to keep my voice steady. Jason sits beside me, and kisses me. The way he kisses me calms the nerves, and the threatening storm of our guilt and mistakes above us, if only for a moment. “I...I want you to know that this doesn’t change anything. I love you, Y/N, and I’m going to love this child, too,” Jason admits, before he kisses me one more time before he puts on his helmet. I turn to watch Jason stand up in all his Red Hood glory, as he faces me one last time. “Tim will understand...if we tell him everything. He’s not a hateful guy, and I know it’ll be hard as fuck to regain his trust, but I seriously doubt shit’s going to hit the fan. Trust me.” And on that stressful note, Red Hood left. So...what do you think? Should there be a Part 3??? Let me know, folks! 

[a-jynx]

Too Good At Acting

Summary: You’ve been working on Supernatural as Agony, Crowley’s daughter, for a little, while now and you’ve gotten to know the boys a little bit better, so what happens when they learn of the rocky relationship that’s hidden between scenes?

Pairing: J2x reader, past Alexander Calvert x reader

Warnings: Cursing, angst, with a touch of fluff, mentions of verbal abuse, Alexander being a dick (but only for the fic! he's amazing!)

Notes: I love Alex so no hate towards him!

Forever In Tags: @waywardnewcomer  @natashacamillaus  

Enjoy! Feedback is appreciated!

“Dean, this is ridiculous! Do you really believe that I would-” I growled as Agony, while Jensen or Dean growled back, frowning instantly.

“You know what, Agony, I knew as soon as you and I met that I shouldn’t have trusted you!” Dean snapped back as I took a step back, eyeing the demon knife in his hand. Tightening my hands into fists, I took a step towards him as he eyed me.

“Oh, and why’s that?” I snapped as Dean suddenly threw his arm up and against my chest, as I gasped while my back pressed flushed against the wall of the motel room.

“Because you’re a black-eyed bitch,” he mumbled as I grinned, leaning forward as his ragged breaths fanned across my chest, making my heart thump harder against my ribs than before.

“But that just makes me not fragile..” I whispered when the loud bell cut the scene, the director and stagehands getting ready to clean up the set, yet my back stayed pressed against the wall.

My e/c eyes slowly trailed over Jensen’s face, while his lips stayed parted slightly and his eyes wild, and daring as I tried to fight back the grin on my lips. I tried to wiggle out his hold yet he stayed in his trance.

“Um, Jay... You can put me down, now.” I shyly whispered as Jensen suddenly looked up, meeting my eyes as I broke out into a breathy laugh as he took a step back, his eyes cast to the ground.

“Right, uh, sorry there Y/N/N..” He stuttered while rubbing the back of his neck, just as Jared entered the room only to come to an abrupt stop, sensing the tension between us.

“Are you guys alright? I don’t want to stop you guys from doing anything-” Jared laughed, holding up his hands as I rolled my eyes, moving to walk past him as I felt Jay’s eyes follow my every move.

“We’re fine, Padalecki. Also, like Jensen would want to do anything with me.” I scoffed as I tried to not let the real pain show through my voice while walking past the building of a man.

“Wait, Y/N, are you alright?” Jared’s suddenly concerned voice made me become stiff as I cleared my throat of any real hurt, turning halfway towards the boys I nodded.

“Yes, Jared. I’m perfectly fine.” And with that, I walked away already feeling the boys eyes following my retreating figure out of the set, and back towards my trailer just hoping that Alex would be there to talk about... That.

“Hey, do you think Y/N was acting weird?” I asked Jared and Misha while sitting down to eat for our lunch break. Misha arched a brow, shrugging with a mouthful of steak.

“No, not really. I mean her acting was pretty amazing,”

“No not - that’s not what I meant.” I shook my head, taking a quick drink from the clear cup. “I meant, she’s been acting strange... Like, she’s hiding something.” I sighed as Jared frowned, but nodded slowly.

“Guys, she’s my - our best friend. She would tell us if something was bothering, or wrong with her... Hopefully.” Misha sighed adding a small mumble to the end, yet I caught it.

After a few minutes, I looked around to see that Y/N still wasn’t out of her trailer... Shaking my head, I pushed myself up and away from the table as Jared looked up, following my lead as Misha busied himself with talking to our make-artists.

“Jay, do you really think we should just go see her? I mean, sure she was acting weird but maybe she just needs time-”

“Jared,” I stopped walking as he stumbled to a stop, running into my back some as I sighed, running a hand through my dirty blonde hair as he furrowed his brows.

“It’s Y/N. We need to worry about her.. And I don’t know about you but I feel like it has something to do with that-”

“Alexander Calvert!” A sudden scream came from little ways in front of us, causing us to run forward while screaming out, “Y/N!” The loose gravel below our feet slipping as we tried to move closer, only to see Y/N sitting on her knees with tears dripping down from her chin as we got closer.

“Y/N! Y/N what the hell-” Jared asked as we skitted to a stop, falling to our knees as I wrapped my arms around her shaking shoulders as she turned her face into Jared’s chest while he cradled the other side of her shaking body.

“I.. He... Alex..” She tried to cry out, but only tightened her grip on my and Jared’s shirts. I looked up at Jared, his eyes looking red as they lined with tears while staring back at me. I nodded towards her trailer as Jared nodded, slowly helping me lift her from the rough, sharp gravel.

“Sh, sh, sh, it’s alright Y/N/N... Jared and I are here, it’s alright.” I whispered as Jared released her, moving forward as he opened the door as I lifted her up and held her against my chest.

“A... Alex,” her voice was a mere whimper as I climbed into the small trailer as I moved towards the small couch, resting her back on the plush cushions. Jared closed the door, joining us quickly as she continued to cry her pretty e/c eyes out into our costumes.

It took a few minutes for me to calm down from hysterically crying, I hiccuped while looking up to meet the gorgeous, and caring eyes of Jensen and Jared as I cleared my throat, trying to wipe away the stupid tears.

“Guys, I’m sorry-”

“You don’t have anything to be sorry for, sweetheart.” Jensen smiled softly while one of his hands gently rubbed my arm as Jared leaned forward, placing one of his large hands on my knees.

“What happened, Y/N/N?” Jared’s caring voice broke through my disturbing thoughts as I looked up at him; new tears glossing over my orbs as I sniffled softly.

“We...” I inhaled deeply, sighing out of my nose as I tried to calm my breathing as Jensen gave me a tight squeeze while Jared gave me a tight squeeze on my knee.

“Alex and I... He got so mad about me not taking his acting advice, and when I told him that it was stupid for him to be so... So mad about it, he flipped out. He broke one of our photos together, then before rushing out towards his car he called over his shoulder that...” I paused, as they leaned forward as they waited for me to finish.

“We’re done. Over. Nonexistent... Whatever word you want to use.” I sighed as I felt more tears slowly dripping down my cheeks, but a calloused thumb was there to wipe it away... Or, more like two.

“Awe, Y/N... Hey, it’s going to be okay, you’re going to be okay. Jensen and I, we’re still here and we’re not going to leave you - ever.” Jared grinned softly as Jensen nodded along, adding something quickly.

“I mean, hell, Jared and I had a bad feeling about that Alexander kid since you introduced us... And we wanted to know-” Jensen paused as he looked over at Jared with a questioning look.

Jared grinned slowly before nodding as I looked at them both with a confused look, while my eyes still watered and small drips went past my eyelids. Both of their thumbs reaching up and dusting away the droplets.

“Jared and I were wondering if you would want to... Well, to be in a three lovers relationship..? Only if you want too! I mean, we’ve thought about this for a while but we didn’t want to make it... Weird?” At the end of Jensen’s speech, it sounded that more of a question as I felt my heart slowly begin to swell. I moved forward and pressed my lips against Jensen’s rough ones, only to pull away and press them against Jared’s.

“Only if you both promise to not get mad at each other if the other gets more time with me,” I grinned as they both wrapped their arms tightly around my shoulders and waist as I fought back a laugh.

“Well, good thing we’re both too good at acting.” Jared shrugged as Jensen and I rolled our eyes as Jared scoffed, pressing his lips to my temple, as Jensen did the same.

[bloo-jae]

Doe's Playlist

1. Billie Eilish - No Time To Die

"Was I stupid to love you? / Was I reckless to help? / Was it obvious to everybody else / That I'd fallen for a lie / You were never on my side"

2. Jack Stauber - Fighter

"Call me fighter / I'll mop the floor with you / Call me lover / I'll take you for a drink or two"

3. Mr. Kitty - Dream Diver

"I'm always falling apart / Always losing my mind / Losing everything when I think of you / Tell me the reason why / Tell me that I should trust you / I'm always running away / Always leaving behind / All the memories I held in my heart / I gave you everything / Now I can never trust you"

4. Mr. Kitty - Sanctum of Ash

"Time will smooth me out / Down to ash and dust / All the weight is lifted / As my memory rusts"

"Let me be the shards / Scattered through your past / I will pull you through / The fragments that kept me attached / Just let me go"

5. Kali Uchis - Dead To Me

"I don't know what you've been told / See, I am not your enemy / But if there's one thing that I know / It's that you ain't a friend to me"

"You think you got problems with me / But baby, I don't even think about you / You watch everything that I do / But what are you up to, I haven't a clue / 'Cause baby, you're dead to me / Why I can't I be dead to you / I think that we both know the truth / You're obsessed, just let me go"

6. Tally Hall - Just Apathy

"My course is run and I'm so tired / Until the next one comes inspired / I feel bad and I should / I made her sad and I knew it would / 'Cause it's one thing / Or another / I don't even know why I bother / One thing just tears her down"

7. Matt Maeson - Dancing After Death

"If I let go / Would you hold on / Would we fly / Is it safer / If we just say / That we tried / Are we laughing / At the danger / Are we dancing after death / You and I"

8. Oliver Tree - Hurt

"I'm sorry if I hurt you / I'm sorry if it got that bad / I'm sorry I can't help you / Somebody should've had your back"

"I tried but / I don't think so / Maybe it was me who was fuckin' up / I gave all / I could give but / It seems like it never really was enough"

9. Vashti Bunyan - I'd Like to Walk Around in Your Mind Someday

"I'd like to walk around in your mind someday"

"You say you just want peace and to never hurt anyone / You see the end before the beginning has even begun"

"But most of all I'd like you to be unaware / Then I'd just wander away, trailing palm leaves behind me / So you don't even know that I've been there"

10. Frozen Musical - Monster

"If I'm a monster / And it's true / There's only one thing that's left for me to do / But before I fade to white / I'll do all that I can to make things right"

11. Dirt Poor Robins - Great Vacation

"Dear Mr. Thoughtless, there's some things you shouldn't say / for the judge can hear you and it soon will be the day / Where he'll take the words you spoke and lay them at your feet / Syllables and decibels, he didn't miss a beat"

12. ieuan - Virtual Reality

"Tell me this is real / It's been hard to feel alive for a while it seems / Is this our destiny? / Virtual reality has got a hold on me"

13. Kansas - Carry On My Wayward Son

"Once I rose above the noise and confusion / Just to get a glimpse beyond the illusion / I was soaring ever higher / But I flew too high"

"Masquerading as a man with a reason / My charade is the event of the season / And if I claim to be a wise man / It surely means that I don't know"

14. Next Year's End - Faceless

"Who are you now? / What have you become?"

"I'm not the person who I wish I was / I've fallen victim to my misjudgements / A dinner for two and I feel so alone / I gave my jacket to a cold soul"

"I know myself / More than I ever have before / It's times like these / I'm free"

"Know yourself before you love someone else"

15. The Submarines - 1940

"Something's wrong when you regret / Things that haven't happened yet / But it's a glorious day when morning comes / Without the feeling of alarm"

"You couldn't sleep for the awful fright / That kept you up in bed last night / But while curious shapes shift in the dark / They vanish with the sunrise spark"

16. Cavetown - This is Home

"Get a load of this monster / He doesn't know how to communicate / His mind is in a different place / Would everybody please give him a little bit of space?"

"Get a load of this train wreck / His hair's a mess and he doesn't know who he is yet / But little do we know the stars / Welcome him with open arms"

"Time is / Slowly / Tracing his face / But strangely he feels at home in this place"

17. Oliver Tree - Alien Boy

"I fell down to Earth / From a hundred miles away and somehow / I still make it work / But it's overrated and somehow played out"

"Ten doors down but you still can't see me / I talk a lot of shit so you won't believe me / I really wouldn't say anything else / I shouldn't be standing here all by myself"

"'Cause I'm out there / Tried to tell you that I'm out here on my own"

18. Bo Burnham - From God's Perspective

"You're not going to Heaven / Why the fuck would you think I'd ever kick it with you? / None of you are going to Heaven / There's a trillion aliens cooler than you"

19. Tally Hall - Ruler of Everything

"I've been you, I know you, your facade is a scam / Y'know you're making me cry, this is the way that I am / I've been living a lie, a metaphorical scheme / Detective, undercover, brotherhood, objective, obscene"

20. The Neighbourhood - W. D. Y. W. F. M?

"Two nights ago, she got that look in her eyes / Kaleidoscope, but that's only half the time / Three days before, she told me that I don't even try / She's crazy though, I guess there's something wrong inside"

"Maybe you're right, maybe this is all that I can be / But what if it's you, and it wasn't me? / What do you want from me?"

21. The Neighbourhood - How

"How could you question God's existence / When you question God himself / Why would you ask for God's assistance / If you wouldn't take the help"

"They say the end is coming sooner / But the end's already here"

22. atlas - dissociate

"I saw a picture frame, but it turned out to be a mirror / My reflection's so much clearer when I'm not aware it's me"

"It's a long way down if you fall / And it's a long way up if you don't / And it's a long way down if you fall / And it's a long way out so / I sit in the center and I ponder my disinterest for it all"

"It's a lot easier to imagine ending things / When I'm watching myself from the third person / It's a lot easier to imagine changing things / When I'm watching myself from the third person"

23. Mindless Self Indulgence - It Gets Worse

"Hey, you, baby, you don't know / How bad it's gonna get / If you think shit sucks now / You ain't seen nothin' yet"

"Now, I'm no psychologist / I'm no doctor with no degree / But it don't take no fuckin' scientist to figure out that there is nothing in this world for me"

"You're going down the road, the same one that we have / We cannot wait to see life kick you in your ass / I shed a little tear for all of you out there / There's no way to escape, there's no way to escape"

24. Foals - Spanish Sahara

"I'm the fury in your head / I'm the fury in your bed / I'm the ghost in the back of your head"

"Now the waves, they drag you down / Carry you to broken ground / So I'll find you in the sand / Wipe you clean with dirty hands"

"So god damn this boiling space / It's the Spanish Sahara / The place that you wanna leave the horror here / Forget the horror here / Forget the horror here / Leave it all down here / It's future rust and it's future dust"

25. Raye - Bet U Wish

"I think you understand you messed up / But now how dare you even mention love / Love is the last thing that you gave to me / And don't you even think to lie, don't you even think to lie / There are no words that you could ever say / To erase the hurt you sent my way / I'm still returning from recovery / I bet you wish that you were mine, bet you wish that you were mine"

"Everything is gone / For you I have nothing, absolutely nothing / But I bet you wish, I bet you wish, I bet you wish / I bet you wish, I bet you wish, I bet you wish"

26. Mother Mother - Ghosting

"I've been ghosting / I've been ghosting along / Ghosting the world / Ghost with no home"

"I remember / I remember the days / When I'd make you / Oh so afraid"

"And this is why I have decided / To leave your house and home unhaunted / You don't need poltergeists for sidekicks"

27. OneRepublic - Everybody Loves Me

"Don't need my health, got my name and got my wealth / I stare at the sun just for kicks all by myself / I lose track of time, though I might be past my prime / But I'm feeling oh, so good"

28. SIAMÉS - Mr. Fear

"Hello, my name is Mr. Fear / I wish I had a faster therapy / I've come to mind control your needs / Tonight I'm gonna star all of your leads"

"You know, I'll never disappear / Now get me out of here / Don't trust in me, my dear / No cure is coming"

"'Cause you make me feel like I'm so alone / I know it's not real, but it's in my soul / And I just can't try to face the dark inside my head"

29. Jai Paul - BTSTU

"I know I've been gone a long time, but / I'm back and I want what is mine"

30. Absofacto - Dissolve

"Your voice like an angel / Chainsmoking all month long / Like you're someone I believe in"

"You held me, but I'm volatile / And never got my head screwed on / Now I'm melting through the floor"

"Am I only a lab rat / Someone you can test things on / Are you training for a new love?"

"All in white, like you're an angel / With the sun glimmering off your glass mask / This isn't what I signed up for"

[p101recaps]

Broduce 101: Episode  7 (Quick Livestream Recap)

I’m sorry this is late, I took down notes when I watched the livestream and effectively passed out from exhaustion after lol

We go back for the position evals, and I’m sure by now everyone knows what went down. Not only was it top class fuckery, it was just sheer nonsense. The utmost shameless fuckery, all thanks to the ridiculous voting system and petty fans.

Mnet switched their editing style up. It’s more all over the place as opposed to the normal levels of all over the place.

BTS’s Spring Day vocal team kicked things off. They’ve been dressed well, in shades of pastel pink. 

This is a team of sweet kids.

They decide the main vocal will be centre but none of them can seem to sing well enough at their first discussion

Kim Youngjin gets to be centre because he has more impact than little Woojin and he also makes them all feel a bit bad because he points out this may be his last performance. He’s a rapper but feels comfortable singing after carrying his team last group mission

Only baby chick Seonho votes for baby maknae Woojin lol

It upsets him and his satoori wavers. His singing seems inconsistent, even though the vocal coaches prefer Woojin’s voice

Youngjin gives up centre to Woojin, which is smart. Sidenote: Youngjin’s new copper hair is a good look

Baby Woojin makes new mum Kahi coo, but he’s having a hard time hitting some high notes

Jinyoung’s tone gets a lot of approval. It’s very pleasant but I suspect there’s something weird about how he was trained. He sounds so strained and out of breath, which should be corrected quickly for idols

Daniel gets unnecessary screentime during the performance. Mnet needs to cool down

The stage is very beautiful and the boys look good but the performance was not great. Seonho showed off his piano skills.

Woojin’s voice cracked, as we all know from fancams. It’s a shame because they should have rearranged the song if they knew their main vocal was struggling with it. Strangely enough, Kenta and Seonho ended up sounding the most stable because they didn’t have as much to sing. Kenta’s a better singer than I thought. Youngjin’s good for a rapper too.

Live rankings: Youngjin<Jinyoung<Kenta<Woojin<Seonho. Kenta almost cries again.

NSYNC’s POP is up next. I could’ve sworn it was called Dirty Pop for the longest time. 

This is the team of low ranking trainees that were forced to pick the position and song because it was the only one with spots lefts, with only Jung Jung as an actual dancer. Most of them are singers and rappers.

Woodam is particularly discouraged because he’s not the strongest dancer and he’s only received whatever attention he has due to his voice

They’re scared at choreo check in since Kahi doesn’t pull her punches, but Kwon Jaesung likes their choreo and Kahi appreciates their rallying despite not getting to show off the skills they wanted to

The episode focuses on Woodam but they were all desperate especially considering that they’re low ranked as well. 

They work hard, bless them.

The full performance is better on broadcast than it was on fancam (I think they released dress rehearsal cams), they do as much as they could. Jung Jung does his flips and flashes his underage stomach. All in all cute but largely forgettable. They flash hearts at the end. Chungha sends one too.

Live rankings: Sangbin<Woodam<Insoo<Jaechan<Kiwon<Jung Jung. 

Rap evals, SMTM Who You is up.

This performance trended because of the Ha Minho edit. It’s hilarious because this means Mnet can actually do their job but are usually just sloppy. It’s also scary because it reminds you that they can Chanmi you easy if you mess up

All of them are rappers rapping this time around, but they’re a bit awkward around each other 

Euiwoong is specially feeling the dread as he has to perform with Woo Jinyoung, who is an acknowledged talented rapper by all the trainees, and Sanggyun, who has done the rounds at SMTM like every idol rapper. 

They’re not impressed by Euiwoong’s desire to be centre, and they all end up voting to make Jinyoung centre. 

This editing is really slick, I can barely tell they’re missing Minho. I can only catch him in reflections lol

Sanggyun keeps forgetting his lyrics but the coaches rave about Woo Jinyoung. They all get praised at dress rehearsal though

THEY FUCKIN BLURRED OUT HA MINHO LIKE HE’S JAY PARK’S ARM

I take back my comment about their editing being slick

The performance itself is fine, they’re really confident on stage. Sanggyun and Jinyoung in particular are good. Euiwoong isn’t great but after Dongbin last episode, I’m glad he can at least keep up. They get a lot of hype from the crowd and coaches. 

Sanggyun in particular gets a lot of passionate screams. 

The editing....oh man do I have a lot to say for this one when I do my in depth performance post

Live rankings: Euiwoong<Sanggyun<Jinyoung<Ha Minho. 

I am cracking up at how awkward this is. He must have been impressive though, he’d hyped himself up by whining about not getting to rap for a while so I assume he lived up to that. 

Rap evals, IKON’s Rhythm Ta is next

Namoo Actor’s Lee Youjin becomes an unwilling leader. He didn’t enjoy his stint carrying the responsibility last mission but his dongsaengs look at him hopefully. 

He sighs, giving in.

Starship’s little kid Gwanghyun gets to be centre although he’s originally a vocalist. He had rapped at the first episode evals too though?

He gets critiqued by the vocal coaches about his flow, and there’s a cute bit where he gets coached by Woo Jinyoung.

They seem to enjoy working together, and get along well. What a trio of puppies.

The stage is pretty average. There was nothing wrong with it per se, but there isn’t anything outstanding about it either. It would have been fun to watch live, I reckon, a fun song to dance or sing along to. Gwanghyun sings the bridge, which helps the performance. Enjoyable.

Live rankings: Youjin<Taewoo<Gwanghyun. He cries out out of guilt towards his hyungs. They must have all got really close. 

They showed the rap position rankings, and Nation’s Leader GodJonghyun was first. The performance was after his Sejung edit aired, and he looks very handsome, but he feels bad because of his mistake. 

Brand New Music’s Youngmin was second and Cube’s Lai Guanlin third.

Vocal evals, BoA’s Amazing Kiss is up

Aw I really miss her. 

Most of them picked the song never having heard it when their original picks got filled up. It’s an old song, and was more famous in Japan, where it was released first before it re-released in SK, if I remember right

They listen to it for the first time, and rearrange it with RBW Lee Gunhee’s help as leader. He also gets picked as centre over Yoon Heeseok, whose singing isn’t as reliable. 

It makes him Joo Haknyeon aka Kwon Hyunbin after, according to the editing, and he keeps being distracted and non committal. Gunhee feels bad. 

They have a discussion to talk it out. Heeseok cries. Healing and empathy. Power of friendship. Redemption arc! 

They impress BoA at their check in with her before before she leaves for her schedule

The set is beautiful, like the starry night sky. It reminds me of Lovelyz’s Destiny stages. Gorgeous.

The performance is good, the arrangements suits the song and the trainees. Yoon Heeseok forgets his lyrics and cracks his voice right after at the end of one of his lines, he recovers very well though. 

Gunhee and Sunghyuk are as good as I’d expected. Dongsu looks incredible, but that nasal tone needs to be reserved for sections where it truly fits. 

A wink from RBW Lee Gunhee that makes his eliminated RBW trainee friends die of shock. He’s really so extra, I love it.

Aw Dongmyung, I miss that ball of fluff. A fanaccount said Sunghyuk did his warm up dance that evening, which is beyond adorable if it’s true

Yoon Heeseok cries for Sung Hyunwoo too :(

Live rankings: Heeseok<Sunghyuk<Dongsu<Gunhee

Vocal evals, IOI’s Downpour. It’s also called Sonagi.

Lee Seokhoon is dressed in the same way that the team is lol

What is with this flood of millennial pink. 

I kinda like it.

Jaehwan picks Sewoon as his rival, look at this broship get the Mnet edit approval

Ha Sungwoon doesn’t want to be leader and suggests his hyung instead and so Auntie Jisung becomes leader with a dramatic ceremony befitting him

No one knew Yoon Jisung is a vocal behind the memes. A man of layers.

They all want to show off their serious vocal chops. Sungwoon gives up centre to Jaehwan. Auntie Jisung gives him a smiley double thumbs up

Hyunbin has really good luck with his teams. He gets a redemption arc edit from a very guilty Mnet that essentially pushed him off a cliff for Jonghyun

His team is helpful and he gets to be the Sohye to Jisung’s Sejung this time around. Jisung mentions he wants the team to do well and prove himself too since people have been horrid to him for being not handsome 

Trainer Seokhoon asks at one point if he knows why he’s 3rd in rankings, he says it’s because he speaks well/a lot. I’m not sure which one he said

Hyunbin gets a lot of coaching and support from his teammates but he can barely sing in his own range

Jisung essentially mothers Hyunbin like the halmeoni he is and his teammates flood the guy with support, creating one large GodJonghyun moment.

I’m the girl in the audience screaming Jisung-ssi Jisung-ssi hwaiting!

The performance is...very good. It’s like watching the If It Is You stage again. They get a lot of intense close-ups to look beautifully sad and use their voices to sound beautifully sad. It’s so lovely. Kwon Hyunbin’s voice is a sore thumb but it looks like Auntie Jisung is his coaching mum even there. 

Ha Sungwoon and Minhyun sound great, Jaehwan is of course flawless. 

Trainees that cry: Gunhee (ofc), Eunki (whose whole team helpfully flaps their hands at him to dry his tears)  and Seonho. 

Noh Taehyun blinks back his tears furiously, thinking of the fruit face comments, ending up having to brush his tears away before they fall at the end. Softie.

Hyunbin gets the whole crowd to chant don’t cry as he sobs. Little Woojin points out hilariously that Hyunbin yanked out his in-ear even as he cried

Live rankings: Hyunbin (pat pat goes Auntie Jisung) <Jisung<Sungwoon<Minhyun<Jaehwan. Auntie Jisung mom hugs everyone and Hyunbin cries again.

Vocal position rankings are announced, with Baby Chick Yoo Seonho third, Jung Dongsu second and Lee Gunhee first. 

Dance evals’ Get Ugly is up, with the most hype fans

They’re serving very teenage boyfriend looks, their styling is great.

Their behind the scene issues are stacked team problems. Daniel becomes leader, inspired by Nation’s Leader Angel GodJonghyun

Straight up, Samuel wants to be centre. So does Jihoon. Samuel has a breakdown. 

The more I watch him, the more it sinks in that he’s sixteen.

Park Woojin timidly wants to be centre too. Cutie.

They give it to Samuel because he’s so keen and the song is for a foreigner, whatever that means. 

The POP team says they have one good dancer with Jung Jung, but the Get Ugly team are all Jung Jungs lol

Coach Kwon Jaesung says they’re beyond the Avengers, they’re the Guardians of the Galaxy.

Okay then, Dabbing Ajusshi.

Their dance check in is a mess. They all have different dance styles and it’s affecting their team. Daniel suddenly feels the weight of being a leader, he’s more hesitant when it comes to choreographing as opposed to the other dance leaders. Kahi is not impressed, they need to get their shit together

The performance is fine. I have a lot to say about it in the in-depth post. Woojin stands out in particular as someone who catches your eye because of his dancing. Of course, Ong-ssi’s bit of showmanship is memorable. Daniel does too, his new hair works well on him. 

We see some more ab flashes. I’m becoming immune. I’m used to seeing them only when Nam Woohyun doles them out. It used to be like rain in a desert. And legal, too.

Hyungseob blows a kiss and winks. 

Park Jihoon made that anime reference a trend for real.

Live rankings: Samuel<Daniel<Hyungseob<Ong-ssi<Jihoon<Woojin

This show has wrecked a sixteen year old boy.

Dance position rankings place Noh Taehyun first, Joo Haknyeon second and Hong Eunki third. 

The stacked team’s fans sunk them. I hope they’re pleased. 

At least Noh Taehyun rose to heights he deserves. He’s a true triple threat, I’m glad for my crybaby.

I’m glad for Woojin getting some well deserved credit for his talent, but Samuel is a good dancer if nothing else, and having Park Sungwoo multiple ranks above him is a travesty. 

Jang Moonbok, in a display of unbelievable unfair immaturity, ranked last in the rap positions. Kim Dongbin ranked above him. I’m disappointed.

To sum up, Pledis Kim Jonghyun, Ardor and Able Noh Taehyun and RBW Lee Gunhee get the 110,000 vote benefit for gaining the most votes in their respective position categories. 

Next week, eliminations and song group missions!

This week’s rankings are based on on-site votings, plus benefits (10,000 for ranking 1st in their groups, plus 100,000 for ranking first in their position category):

Lee Gunhee

Kim Jonghyun

Noh Taehyun

Im Youngmin

Yoo Seonho

Kim Yongguk

Kim Jaehwan

Jung Sewoon

Joo Haknyeon

Park Woojin

Jung Jung

[taeyangdyb]

♡Giving love a shot part 52♡

♡Jae’s views♡

Jae: Look whatever it is, it can’t be that bad.

Jay: don’t laugh, are we going to stop having sex now?

Jae:*lol* what kind of question is that?

Jay: I told you not to laugh

Jae: what kind of question is this though?

Jay: well Gray and Byul isn’t doing it

Jae: We’re not Gray and Byul. I’m sure our sex life is much more fun then theirs. Besides Byul’s stomach is getting bigger that’s probably why it might be uncomfortable…if she’s on the bottom

Jay: so we can still do it?

Jae: why?

Jay: just checking. What about when your stomach gets big?

Jae:*brushes his hair back* we’ll find way

Jay: that should be fun

Jae: You being on top, all big and stuff

Jae: hey, you’re mean

Jay: but I know you’ll be the sexiest pregnant woman ever.

Jae: you think so?

Jay: I know so. But  to tell you the truth, I think we’ll Still be smashing even when we’re 50 years old

Jae: can you open this bottle for me, you talk too much shit *hands him a water*

Jay:*open the water and hands it to her* we gonna be having sex even in the nursing home. As long as my d*ck can go up we f*cking

Jae:*spits out her water* BAABE!!

Jay: what?

Jae: You horny?

Jay: as hell

Jae: you’re horrible

Jay:  how?

Jae: you gonna be a father, and you mouth is that dirty?

Jay: how is it dirty? And besides it’s not like they’re here yet *parking the car, walks out in open the door for Gajeel, and her* so what are we doing tonight?

Jae: not sleeping with you

Gajeel:*runs in the house*

Jay: come on babe, it’s been-

Jae: I know how long it’s, but I have plans tomorrow

I know it’s mean but I really wanted to sleep. The next  morning he was in his feelings

Jae: *lay on top of him* good morning

Jay: ….morning

Jae:  You okay?

Jay: I’m fine

Jae: you look fine but you don’t sound like it. What are you doing today?

Jay: nothing going to Q’ s party

Jae: have fun

Jay: You?

Jae: I have a few papers to sign and then I’m taking Joon and Eric somewhere. Have fun

Jay: you’re not going?

Jae: idk if I’m too tired I’ll come straight here.

After getting ready I head out. The day went by rather quickly. I did everything I had to do now I’m just going to slide by the party.

Walking in I feel so under dress wearing a white polka dotted shirt, white jeans, and a black stiletto bootie. I spot Jay where he sit with his friends and of course, this girl who’s been crushing on him for the longest.

The minute I got there, the mood changes, for the better for some and worst for others.

Jae: hey babe, hi guys

Jay: hey

Q: Mrs.Park

Jae: how’s it going?

Q: good, I see you still look beautiful as always

Jae: awe thank you

Jay: you want something to eat?

Jae: no

Jay: drink?

Jae: what are you drinking?

Jay: beer, I’ll get you a water *walks off*

Jae: okay

Simon: so how’s everything? How is he?

Jae: he’s a bit more overprotective.

Loco: more than he was before?

Jae: yup, it gets annoying at times, but I still think it’s cute.

Simon: you scared?

Jae: like crazy

Simon: how did you feel, finding out?

Jae: a hundred thoughts went through my mind, the more I think about it the more I get scared.

Jay: here*hands her a water*

Jae: thanks *gets off of his chair*

Jay: you can sit

Jae: what about You?

Jay: i’ll just stand

Jae: I’ll just sit on you

At this point we are all comfortable with each other, the others don’t mind or care that I’m sitting on Jay’s lap. Or maybe they use to seeing it over the years.

*Jay and Jae in their own little world, and so does everyone else*

Jae: you still mad at me?

Jay:*wraps his arms around her belly* of course not. How was your day?

Jae: tired

Jay: why didn’t you go home?

Jae: I missed you

Jay: awe baby you could’ve called me

Jae: I wanted to see you

Jay: video call

Jae: I wanted to feel you holding on to me like that

Jay: you could’ve told me that on the phone, I was going to meet you half way

Jae: that’s fine *shivers*

Jay: you cold?

Jae: no

Jay: babe?

Jae: a little

Jay: you want to go home?

Jae: I want to stay with you

Jay: Jaeha if you’re tired there’s need for you to be here.

Jae: you want me to leave?

Jay: yes

Jae: okay *frees herself from him*

Jay: babe- I didn’t mean it like that

Jae: I’ll see you later *walks out*

Jay: Jaejae-

*Jay’s views*

I’m not sure why, but Jaeha has been a bit sensitive. For some reasons any little things sets  her off.

I made it home 3hours later, and she was already in bed.

Next morning is awkward, because she doesn’t even want to talk to me.

*Breakfast*

Jay: how was your night?

Jae: fine

Jay: are you feeling alright?

Jae: clearly, since I’m sitting here

Jay: hey I’m just trying to talk, no need to be catching an attitude with me

Jae: im done eating *walks back to their room*

Jay: *follows her* hey, what is wrong with you?

Jae: does it look like anything’s wrong with me?

Jay: yea, SINCE YOU THROWING TANTRUMS LIKE A FREAKING KID, SOMETHING MUST BE WRONG WITH YOU.

Jae:*walks in the bathroom and slams the door*

That escalated quickly.

Jay:*sits on the floor*

4o minutes later she came out all showered

Jay: bae I’m sorr-

Jae: *walks in her closet/dressing room and locks the door*

Jay:*sigh*

Another hour passes and she’s still in there. The only thing she doesn’t have in there is a shower, who knows how long that’s gonna take.

After getting ready she took her thing and walk out without even saying anything to me.

Jay: you going out?

Jae:…

Jay: look I shouldn’t have yelled at you I’m sorry.

Jae:… *walks in the closet and grab a purse and transfers everything from one to another, ignoring him*

Jay: JAEHA!

Jae: WHAT?!

Jay: I’m sorry

Jae: good for you *takes her purse out the door*

*hours later*

I’ve been calling her all day literally no answer. I know for a fact that she has he phone in her bag.

As usual everyone plans to meet up somewhere, I’m sure we all can guess where that is.

*coffee shop*

Because a lot of us as been friends for so long, when we plan to meet up, we’ll need more than one table.

Jay: hey guys

All:*greeted each other*

Byul: where’s Jaeha?

Jay: she went out

Mark: how is she?

Jay: good

Joon: and the baby?

Jay: fine..i guess?

Mark: what you mean you guess? What did the doctor said?

Jay: what- wait I’m lost

Mark: Jaejae has a doctor’s appointment today

Jay: I didnt know that

Mark: oh great

*2ominutes later*

Jae: hello all you little people *mood changes as soon as she see her husband*

Mark: where’d you go?

Jae: shopping, race track and-

Joon: you did what?

Jae: I went to the race-

Mark: Jaejae-

Jae: Mark let’s not have this conversation okay *sits next to Byul* Hey how you feeling?

Byul: like a beach ball

Jae: a cute one

Ailee: when are you fixing your nursery room?

Jae: as soon as I find out what I’m having.

Ailee: when’s your appointment?

Jae: I had one today

Yori: and how’d it go?

Jae: rescheduled

Ailee: why?

Jae: didn’t feel like going, I was not in the mood for things like that

Joon: what you mean things like that?

Byul: please tell me you’re joking?

Jae: I was not in the mood for that

Byul: Jaejae you’re pregnant going to the hospital is a must. When’s your next appointment?

Jae: next week

Ailee: why didn’t you put it for tomorrow?

Jae: I don’t think I’m gonna be in the mood for that tomorrow

She’s kidding right? As if things weren’t awkward enough, this one come out of nowhere.

Lina: hey Jay

Jay: hey

Lina: thanks for the ride last night

Jay: you’re welcome

Lina: mind if I sit?

Jay: uh I guess.

Lina: thanks

*awkward silence*

Byul: so my baby shower is tomorrow,  you guys are coming right?

Jae: uh about that-

Byul: Jaeha I’m exexpecting you, you don’t have a choice

Jae: can-

Byul: whatever it is no, I need you there.

Lina: can I come?

Not sure that’s a good idea

Byul: uhm sure, right babe? *looks at Gray*

Gray: of course it’s your shower.

Byul: great

Jae:*rolls her eyes*

Yori: Jaejae is the new fantasy bra out yet?

Jae: yup, saw it this morning.

Yori: how much is it?

Ailee: who cares about the price, how was it?

Jae: It took, like, 700 hours to create and it has 9,000 gemstones. It was crazy to see that and be able to hold it. And it’s heavy – it weighs more than 450 carats. only a 3 millions 

Yori: that’s not bad

Ailee: so you going for it?

Jae: no yall can have it, I don’t wear lingerie and besides if it was another color I’d get it, or I probably will. Green isn’t my thing

Lina: you’ll spend that much money on a bra? Do you know how much you can do with 3 million?

Jae: I am aware of how much that can be done with 3 million.

Yori: that's  something  poor people say

Ailee: they always calculating stuff

Jae: no only the one's  at the bottom of the food chain.

Jimin: what’s the bottom of the food chain?

Jae: idk ask her

One thing to know with these girls is that if one don’t like you, none of the others will. If you attack one, the rest will come for you.

Jae: I’m leaving

Joon: already?

Jae: yeah, I’m sleepy and hungry

Mark: want anything here?

Jae: no

Mark: you’re going to text me as soon as you get in the car telling me to bring you something, please get it now

Jae: okay, *calls waiter* I’ll have two slices of cheesecake and carrot cake and a water.

The whole table literally shock to see her eat all of that.

Joon: Jaejae?

Jae: what?

Joon: you’re going to have multiple children

Jae: yall need shut up with that

Joon: you will, normally you would eat one each, not two of each

Jae: I did not have breakfast

Joon: that’s all sweet not food, why didn’t you?

Jae: I’ll see you guys later*gets up*

Mark: who’s gonna pay for all this?

Jae: do you have your wallet with you?

Mark: yes

Jae: do the math

Mark: not my favorite subject

Jae:*smile walks towards him and whisper something in his ears*

Mark:*smirk and started laughing* yo that’s not even cool

Jae: then why are you smiling?

Mark: cause…

Jae: I’m listening

Mark: just leave 

Jae: my point exactly,  I’ll see you guys later love you*walking out*

Mark:*follows her* hey, does that mean you won’t-

Jae: have I ever broken a promise to you?

Mark: *smile* I’ll see you later *back to the table*

Joon:*raise his brows* care to share with the whole table?

Mark: not with the whole table*calls the waiter and pays for both his and Jaeha’s food* I’ll see you guys later

Joon: you going to Jae’s?

Mark: no, she was just here

Joon: then where are you going?

Mark: *leans down and whisper something in his ears*

Joon:*bust out laughing* you serious?

Mark: yup, later y'all

Byul: will I see you tomorrow?

Mark: of course

After that, no part of me that wanted to be here. Everyone started to leave one at the time. Since it was already late afternoon I went straight home.

The drive home, all I had in my head is that Jaeha and Mark would be somewhere, but getting in our room there’s candlelight in the bathroom, she’s in the tub with her long rapunzel hair hanging on the floor.

Jay: hey I’m home

Jae: okay

After she got out of the water, we went straight to sleep. I spent half of the night watching her sleep. Again next morning waking up, we had a silent breakfast, and went up to do her work until it was time to leave for Byul’s baby shower.

Jae:*wearing a white floral bodysuit and a knee length leather skirt, and a two piece heels*

Jay: you ready?

Jae: yeah

We drove to the place completely silent. Getting there I know it’s going to be a problem since Byul invited Lina.

In the venue the whole squad is already here.

Gray: the Park’s are here*greets them*

Jae: where’s Byul?

Gray: in the room

Jae: well I’ll see you in a bit *go looks for her friends*

Jay: what is she doing here?

Gray: Byul invited her. Are you guys fighting?

Jay: who?

Gray: you and your wife

Jay: I might’ve yelled at her yesterday

Gray: oh boy

Jay: she was being all sensitive over nothing.

Gray: yo she’s pregnant. Her hormones are going all over the place, her body’s changing that’s all. Byul curse me out out of nowhere, I got curse out for turning on the light. You can’t be frustrated when she’s only a few weeks in. You have 8 more months to go.

Jay:*sigh*

Gray: and do me a favor

Jay: what?

Gray: please don’t entertain Lina tonight.

Jaeha isn’t the type of woman that will argue with anyone if anything she simply ignore you. That’s the worst on me since we still sleep in the same bed regardless of the argument we have. At times like this, she ignores me as if I’m not even in the same same room as her.

Jay:*looking at Jaeha sitting with the other girls*

Chacha:*elbows him* go say sorry

Jay: no use

Chacha: how come?

Jay: I’ve tried saying sorry. If anything my sorries are meaningless

Loco: well figure something out, cause you were wrong

Jay:*walks to her* can I talk to you?

Jae: I’m listening

Jay: can we talk in private?

All the girls leave and close the balcony glass door.

And now I have no idea what to say.

*Meanwhile inside*

Gray: are they going to be okay?

Simon: of course, those two can’t stay mad at each other. If they were going to break up, they would’ve done it years ago.

*Back outside*

♡Jae’s views♡

Is he going to say something or not? I left my jacket inside and this guy got me sitting here and not saying anything.

Jae:*tapping her nails on the table*  I’m going back in

Jay: bae-

Jae:*stands up and hold out her* come on it’s cold

Jay: you still mad at me?

Jae: yea

Jay:*sigh*

Jae:*hugs him*

There’s no use of staying mad at Jaebum. We’re going to talk anyways.

Jay:*looks down at his short wife* Jaejae I still have a lot to learn-

Jae: *reaches up and kiss him* you’re doing fine. Let’s go we’re holding up the party

Back inside the shower continues  we play game. I won most of them since I used to watch Jiyong’s kids, so I’m familiar with a few stuff.

As it gets late in the night, these people started playing question games that as nothing to do with a baby shower.

Gray: I think Jay and Jaeha are the biggest freaks among us

Jay: what?

Jae: excuse me?

Gray: I’m not the only one who think so.

Simon: y'all look like y'all be on some freaky shit

Jae: wow, what exactly do you guys think we do? How did this conversation even to that?

Jay: we both work now. When I get home and she’s sleeping, I don’t wake her up. And half of the time I wake up she already left. Even if she’s home at times she’s stuck in a office.

Chacha: what it can happen during your lunch break, car and stuff.

Jay: that’s what YOU do in your dressing room

Chacha: don’t you all do that ?  

Jay: uh no

Jae: that’s nasty *looks at her friend*

Ailee: what about you?

Jae: I only do that in my bedroom

Loco: Only?

Jae: yea only in

Simon: what if you get the urge while you out?

Jae: I hold it in

Gray: hold it in?

Jae: yea, or I just tell him and then we leave where ever we were. Jay’s always in the mood for that. If we’re far from home, we just find a hotel.

I feel sorry for this girl that’s still here. Like is she not getting uncomfortable? *tsk tsk tsk* poor thing.

Yori: so when do you find Jay the sexiest?

Jae: honestly it’s either he’s wearing clothes or he isn’t, I’m okay either way. But I think Jay’s the sexiest when he’s wearing a suit and has his hair pull back

Jay: *smile*

Jae: or naked either one works for me.

All these sex talks are making me feel some type of way, and I really don’t want to do that tonight.

♤Jay’s views♤

We stay up and talk, Jaejae fell asleep. I had to wait till she wake up to leave. The next couple days we’ve got very busy due to Valentine’s concert. Jae and I barely see each other, when I’m home she’s in business meeting away, when I’m away she’s home, or we’re both out of the country.

♡♡VALENTINE’S DAY♡♡

Valentine’s day creeps up on people so fast it’s ridiculous. This is the first one in a while that I’ll be celebrating alone. I’m not upset, because I know how the whole business thing works

Simon: what are you doing later?

Jay: heading home

Simon: come on man, you know the tradition

Jay: Jaejae is not here, not in a party mood.

Simon: well your wife specifically told me to take you, so you would not spend it alone *shows him the text messages*

Jay: okay but just one hour.

We had a good show…. as always. Now time for that party.

*Jay texting Jae*

Jay: hey

Jae: hi

Jay: what you up to?

Jae: signing my hundredth paper for the day. You?

Jay: at the party you wanted me to go

Jae: having fun?

Jay: yea

Jae: really? Someone just sent me a pic of how miserable you are

Jay: it not fun if you ain’t here, I missed you

Jae: who said I’m not there?

Jay: what? *looks around*

Jae: *standing across the room still in her business attire*

Both:*walks towards each other*

Jay:*hugs her* I missed you

Jae: I missed you to

Jay: why didn’t you tell me you were coming?

Jae: I wanted to make in back before the 15th. The drive from the airport to the house would take too long, but from here to the airport isn’t that far.

Jay:*smile*

Jae: where’s everyone?

Jay: somewhere around making out

Jae: oh

Jay: wanna go home?

Jae: you ready to go?

Jay: yeah I’m tired, it’s been a long day

Jae: okay.

*outsite*

Jae: want me to drive?

Jay: yea

Jae: *smile* I thought you hate it when I drive?

I hate when she drive, but I wanna get home under one hour. Why? Because I want her so bad right now.

Just as I thought, under an hour.

Getting to our room it has pedals from the door to the bathroom, with the lights dim.

Jay: Babe?

Jae: I thought you’d be too busy to do it, so I did it for you. *pulls him in the bathroom* come on

Jay: are you going to undress me to?

Jae: do you want me to?

Jay: nah I got it

Jae: okay

It’s obvious that the sexual tension is pretty high, but she’s just… I don’t know ignoring it. We sat in the tub and watch a full movie and then gets out.

After getting out, she puts on her robe.

Jae: I’m going to get something from my old room I’ll be back

Jay: okay

In the meantime, I’m just going to get ready for bed. Jaeha and I started to record her belly growth process, even though there’s nothing there yet, we still do it every day.

Going through her bag I found the camera and start looking at the days when I wasn’t around. It’s coming along a little bit. Time to do tonight’s check up.

Jay:*turns on the camera as he heard the door opening*  ladies and gentlemen please welcome Mrs.Park to the….. stage

Definitely not what I expected. I’ve known her for almost 10 years, and I’ve never seen Jaeha in a lingerie. Sweat shirts are as lingerie as I get.

Jae: what are you doing?

Jay: I’m about to record this historic moment of you wearing something like this 

Jae: okay suits you *walks to the bathroom and brushes her teeth* stop recording.

Jay: why? it’s fun

Jae: babe

Jay:*still follows her around*

Jae: you’re sick

It is just so fun messing with her.

Jae: okay fine, I’ll just give you something to record

The look on her face change from being nice to im gonna be petty at F*ck

Jay: *backing away* what are you doing?

Jae: giving you something to record

Jay:*turns off the camera* you win

Jae: I thought you wanted to record?

Jay: I was just kidding

Jae:  see I had the whole night planned out for you, but you ruined it.

Jay: bae-

Jae: oh well at least I tried. Night babe *kisses him and fixes herself in her spot*

She’s kidding me ..right?

Jay: babe I am horny af, how you expect me to sleep on this bed with you looking like that and not touching you?

Jae: the room next door’s empty.

She gave in at the end of the night Of course.

*next morning*

Jay: you know, you should wear lingerie more often

Jae: I will pass on that thank you. *sigh* I should  probably get up now

Jay: work?

Jae:*snuggles on his chest* yea.

After we both got up and showered Jae went in her office and started working. Before I’d have to get out of the house and go to my office, but since I have both office an studio at home I can just go in my sweat pants.

Our offices are far from each other. It’s sucks but good at the same time. Jaeha’s office is in the main house, while mine is away but not too far from it. I’m okay with that, because sometimes I have work related meetings, I don’t want just anyone walking in and out of the main house.

Jaeha stays in the main house, cause she only does paper works, no one goes in her office besides her lawyer, dad, Mr.Kim and I. Jaeha’s one of these people once she focuses on doing something, she lose conscious, she doesn’t get up to pee or eat. Even if there was an Alien invasion and everyone died she wouldn’t know.

*knocks on her office door*

Jay: hey

Jae: hi

Jay: can I come in?

Jae: sure

Jay: how’s it going?

Jae: good

Jay: are you gonna be done anytime soon?

Jae: not really, why? *looking through papers*

Jay: dinner’s ready?

Jae: oh

*dinner table*

Jay: how’s it going?

Jae: straight

Jay: you gonna go back?

Jae: no, my butt and back  hurt, I feel like crap, my head hurt.

Jay: you gonna take anything?

Jae: I’m pregnant I can’t just take anything.

After we ate, I wanted to go out, but Mrs.Park isn’t feeling well so I’m just going to stay in, like that the day end.

*next day*

This woman was almost in tears all night, but when I woke up this morning, she went out to work. I guess that means I have to head out to.

♡Jae’s views ♡

*10hrs later*

I haven’t been feeling well all day. I'm  sleepy, but going to meetings after meetings I don’t even have time to complain.

Finally the end of the day, time for me to drive home.

Mr.Kim: would you like me to drop you home?

Jae: no, you’re probably  tired, we’ve had a long day.

Mr.Kim: it’s no problem, my job isn’t finish until I know you’re home safe.

Jae: how effective is coffee?

Mr.Kim: it’s pretty effective, but considering the fact that you’ve never had it once in your life, I wouldn’t advise  it.

Jae: come on it can’t be that bad, can it?

Actually it was that. I got a coffe on the way home and by the time I made it, I couldn’t stop throwing up. I’m just greatful I was able to make it home in a piece.

Jae:*calls Jay*

Jay: hey babe what’s up?

Jae: where are you?

Jay: I’m out with the guys

Jae: oh

Jay: what’s up you don’t sound to good?

Ok if I tell Jay I’m fine and he comes back and find me where I currently am * laying down next to the toilet* he’s gonna be mad, but I also don’t want to interrupt his “guy time”.

Jae: I’m alright

Jay: you sure?

Jae: yea, I’ll see you later

Jay: Jaejae if you’re lying to me I’m gonna be very pissed off, what’s wrong?

Jae: throwing up

Jay: why? Did you eat anything?

Jae: I had some coffee

Jay: What? You never drink coffee

Jae: I was tired, I didn’t feel like driving

Jay: you have drivers, you could’ve called me *sigh* where are you?

Jae: next to my new best friend, the toilet

Jay: can you move?

Jae: every time I move, I feel sick and throw up

Jay: okay I’m coming home.

Jae: iight

*Meanwhile Jay’s side*

Beenzino: you good man?

Jay: Jae’s not feeling well

Simon: what'sup?

Jay: she drank coffee, now she’s throwing up

Simon: she never drink coffee

Jay: yea I don’t know what possessed  her today

Simon: thats  your cue to leave

Jay: yeah I’ll see you guys later

On the way home I called my mom and asked her what I should do, she said soup.

Walking in she was on the floor, I know it sucks, cause the floor is cold.

Jae: you look nice

Jay: you look miserable

Jae: the floor is comfier than I thought

Jay: I’m not even going to ask you how your day was. Come on lets get you clean up

Jae: I didnt throw up on myself, and I can get up on my own

Jay: What are you talking about?

Jae: I’m saying that this is so embarrassing

Jay: how is me taking care of you embarrassing? Do you know how many times I’ve changed your clothes?

Jae: yeah, but normally I be K.O'ed 

Jay:*sigh*

I dont know why she’s making a fuss.

Jay: what do you want me to do?  Leave you on the floor?

Jae: just help me up. *sits on the edge of the tub* I’m sleeping in my other room tonight

Jay: wae?

Jae: I wanna skip shower

She wouldn’t go down without a fight. I spent the night watching her, she is sweating like crazy. I hope there’s nothing wrong with her, cause my schedule is going to be hectic for the next couple of weeks. We all know that I can’t function if this girl is not okay.

Waiting for her to wake up…. Waiting Waiting Waiting *sigh* still waiting

Is it normal to sleep the whole day without waking up?

Jay:*calling mom*

Mom: hello

Jay: mom

Mom: yes

Jay: is it normal for Jaeha to sleep all day?

Mom: I think that alright since she is pregnant

Jay: but she’s been sleeping since yesterday

Mom: is she alright?

Jay: she had coffee yesterday, and she was throwing up all night, and whatever she ate or drink, came right out

Mom: Jaeha doesn’t like coffee

See EVERYONE KMOWS IT

Jay: should I wake her up or no?

Mom: yea, try giving her something to eat. Nothing too heavy  maybe some soup or something. Even if she doesn’t want to eat all of it.

Jay: mom? Do you know how hard it's  gonna be to wake her up, let alone force her to eat

Mom: it’s gonna be 10x worst when you have kids so take this as practice.

After 25 minutes I finally get her. To wake up. She doesn’t want to eat cause she think she’ll throw up.

Jay: how you feeling?

Jae: sleepy

Jay: uh uh no no no , no more sleep.

Jae: I’m tired

Jay: because you’ve been sleeping all day, come on let’s go take a walk

Jae: I hate walking

Jay: let’s go for a drive, ice cream, anything but sleep.

We managed to leave the house. I try to bring as much conversations as possible just to keep her awake

Jay: so I was thinking that I should get my parents and apartment, you know close to us

Jae: that’s a good idea-

Jay: why do I feel there’s a but coming?

Jae: but why not get them a house instead of renting out an apartment.

Jay: not really following you, it’s just the two of them why get them a house?

Jae: they want a place to make memories, you know draw on the walls, pictures you know things that won’t be moving to different houses.

Jay: did you do that?

Jae: at my dad’s parents house yea, my grandparents have my drawing still in both their offices, so does my dad.

Jay: how come I dont have any?

Jae:*lol* you have a long way to go.

Jay: *sigh* I know

Jae: should we go back home now?

Jay:*looks at her*

Jae: dont worry, I’m fine, i just wanna eat.

Jay: should we get something while we’re out?

Jae: no

Jay: babe

Jae: I’m sure.

We drove back home and just chill.

[survivorbouvetisland]

Episode #4/5: “I'm just lying and making a big deal about things because it is funny”- Bodhi

Bodhi

I don't know what is even happening I'm just lying and making a big deal about things because it is funny

Roxy

Im aolot inactive. Lmfoa

the serious confessioanl didnt uplod :/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NesmOdGOnX4

Lol thibis eric's org

Trixie 

If all goes as planned, Shea is gone! We purposely threw the comp to get you out. I just wanna say it's nothing against you as a person, I would have loved to work with you but we all felt you were going to be a problem later on so we had to send you home now. 

I feel really bad that I had to vote Zack out especially with him being a newbie. I also feel awful not letting Roxy in on our alliance. Hopefully with merge she can join us. She really doesn't deserve to get voted off so soon.

So we threw the comp yet again and it worked - Zack is out. I would have liked to work with him but I knew he'd be a vote for the other side once we merged. Nehe's voting confessional for him was BRUTAL. It makes me scared if I ever got a vote from him. We had yet another tribe swap, back to 3 teams again. I travelled through tribes and landed on Skua with basically all my alliance minus Austin. I hope he manages to stay safe so when merge comes we can reunite as the Outsiders. 

I wonder who Adelie is gonna send home, huh?

QuilLynn 

I feel bad blindsiding shea tonight, i genuinely like him and would have liked to work with him. I think the tribe swap fucked him over a bit because he picked people who were already closley aligned (like nehe+trixie, austin+zack) for me right now the safe and smart thing to do is take out shea. I do want austin gone soon though, because once we merge he'll be a huge threat because he has connections on both sides.

so that immunity was a mess. The day started out good, tribal went as planned and we got out shea and going into the new immunity we thought we stood a chance and were genuinely going to try to win, however, knowing that bodhi and kelsey are probably on the bottom of that tribe and would be possible numbers for our alliance come merge we decided to throw it and take out Zack who we believe to be a number for skua. Austin has it out for jay it seems and is looking to take out his numbers and I think he actually thinks he's running things and making the decisions. Thats fine he can think whatever he wants, but it was trixie  and I who made the Shea blindside happen and saved his ass. We OMG INSTANT TRIBAL BRB

This instant might come back to bite me in the ass rip, its messy and people still haven't voted and I think austin thinks i'm voting him

I think roxy is really buying my "innocent newcomer" act right now that i'm using to cover my ass for this zack vote. I'm hoping i can get out of this still with the trust of all my tribe members. If i had to pick one to go next it would be Ali, because that rat went to austin saying I voted him... We'll see what the future holds

This new skua tribe is the perfect stiuation! I have trixie who is my #1 in this game, nehe who i'm closely aligned with and roxy who thinks were together 100%. I really want to win these upcomong challenges because I feel like there will only be one or two votes before we merge and I want all four of us on this new new skua to make it! It would break my heart to vote roxy at this point as we already blindsided her twice at tribals and she still trusts us, so i'm really hoping it doesn't come down to that. I'm also hoping for another clue, since i have one from skua before I think getting a second clue would really help my chances of finding one of these fucking idols!

Once again my team won, I mean so far this whole game I've only been on a losing team if we threw the challenge. I know i'm going to look like a threat come merge but i'm kinda looking forward to it. I'm hoping I can still use my innocent newbie "idk what i'm doing" act to get people to trust me, but I know eventually they'll want to take me out. I feel after this challenge our "outsiders" alliance from albatross will be over. Austin only got 10 points in the challenge so odds are he'll be taken out next, and if he's not then I'd take that as a sign that he joined the other side and if thats the case we'll have no use for him. Part of me is hoping that adelie takes him out tonight that way we don't have to do the dirty work later, but unfortunately I think that comes with the price of losing a jury vote. 

also, nehe is really pissing me off. If we lose the next immunity idgaf about the alliance at this point I like roxy more right now and I'd send his ass home.

The tribe chat is fun and all but... Roxy, girl. Sometimes it's a bit much. Jokes  and sarcasm just flies over her little aussie head. God bless.

Jacob 

Austin be throwin'? I played the challenge for less than an hour and I still got a better score. I hope he doesn't have an idol.

Shea

Aint shit

Austin 

:)

Rig-gate is real huh

Lily 

honestly i dont even know whats going on right now. we swapped? thats cool. we're not going to tribal? rad. honestly like if i got voted out next round i dont know if i'd care that much this premerge is just so chill for whatever reason its like my natural habitat

Andrew

I think Ali is a robot. Also lily and I are lookin for an idol™

Ali

I need to merge next I don't trust these hoes

Kelsey 

My goodness...after that disaster of a video challenge, I was truly blessed to stay. I had never really had the opportunity to connect with anyone and Regan basically eliminating herself was...luck, dear, it was luck XD But then a scadulous tribe swap happens and I'm even LUCKIER!!! With a tribe of four, I feel like we totally could just slay the house down and all four people are people I'm able to bond with over something quickly. Jay was super on the Regan boat and knows that I'm not the best with speaking with people, as was the other snake picture. And Austin says he's rather close to Jay, so I'm feeling rather good if we go to tribal, not that we wi- oh, we already lost, ok. Austin says he would love to work with Jacob and I and to eliminate Jay, which doesn't sound the most predictable, but at this point in the competition, I've never made it to the top thirteen and I usually mess it up for myself when get too involved with voting and being gung ho. This time, maybe I can just take a deep breath and survive past another one...apparently, there is this "plan" to convince Austin that I'm going home which makes the pit in my stomach advance even further but...it can't be helped. I could be making top TWELVE. TWELVE!!!! I've got to just take a deep breath, close my eyes, and jump off the bridge. Let's hope I land in foam~! And THAT'S all there is to it! Bon Apetit, beh-bay~ Kelsey Mikaelson

Zack

I have had Nehe and Austin approach me for a solid three. However, I have also been approached with a solid three person alliance with Trixie and Quillyn. If I can get this group to final five, I think I would be sitting pretty. Unfortunately, that means I have to turn on my alliance I've had from day one with Shea, Roxy, and Ali. But Ali and I have talked and he's going to jump ship with me. 

So, I've had Ali, Austin, and Nehe all trying to subtly convince me to trust the others of the three. It quickly became apparent that they're all working together, or at the very least, Austin has them both wrapped around his finger. Austin also mentioned Bodhi and Jay being numbers for him on the other side. Having everyone on my tribe trust me, I realize that this is my opportune moment to make a game-changing move and flipping the vote on Austin. I convinced Trixie and Quillynn (who have offered me an alliance for the time being) that if we want to succeed at all, we need to split up these three. More specifically, take Austin out because he seems to be the main tie for all of these people. Take out the kingpin, the rest will scatter. With Roxy still trusting me over everyone else, we should have just enough votes to take Austin out. I don't like sitting around, doing what I'm told, and waiting to be taken out in the final six. So sorry, Austin. I really hope you're out this week.

Jay

Regan is going to straight up murder me for voting her out, but sorry. You blew up on Kelsey, you're going home. Sorry not sorry. Also you're just gonna vote with Austin every vote and we can't have him having more power than me :)

Hey guys! This might be my last confessional in this game. So, Austin says he has an idol and that he's playing it. So like, I decided that I'm just gonna go for voting him. The thing is, if me, Jacob, and Kelsey stick strong, and he plays an idol, one of us go. HOWEVER, provided it's not me, whoever is left from Kelsey and Jacob is still trusting of me. Which would not be the case if i threw a vote onto Kelsey and Jacob left. Tribal is starting now. Good luck to me I hope things go well.

Nicholas 

hi so im trying to win this paintball challenge so my ass doesnt get voted off. i feel like for the first time ever in a survivor game i dont fit in with my tribe and like they are going to cut me the first chance they get. oh well i guess we will see what happens. its time to shoot some bitches

Nehemiah 

So now i'm on the albatross tribe and you can say that I'm on the bottom but actually theres people on the tribe I trust. Trixie and Ali are instant ride or die homies in my opinion and so is Austin. After I helped us win the lip sync with my amazing talent Trixie and Quillyn wants to have an alliance with me and Austin as we are the outside forces I am 100% fine with this. But Ali isnt with the other side he's with me and Austin. So this is also good if we go to a tribal. So i'm set up pretty nicely.

We have decided to throw the challenge to get out Shea. I personally have no connection to shea in the form that I didn't care if we threw the challenge. The outsiders alliance of me, QuilLyn, Trixie, and Austin is definitely off to a good start. We got shea to vote Austin and Ali is on board to vote Shea. I'm in a good spot when it comes to everything. I don't know how I'm going to fare going forward in the game but I do think I'm in a very good spot and I know how to speak to people. Zack was doing the challenge all by himself. We tried to throw it and he just wouldn't but to be fair he didn't know. So i had to talk him into throwing and getting out Shea leading on the idea that if he does so Austin and me would work with him. Everything should be good tonight.

The outsiders threw yet another tribal so we can get out Zack.

After our tribal of blindsiding Zack there was in our guts either a tribe swap or merge. As you can see it was a tribe swap and ironically I ended up on a tribe with my 2 fellow Outsiders and Roxy. I lied to Roxy the previous vote but I don't wanna loose that relationship just yet. There's a good chance my new tribe can win immunity and not have to vote off Roxy but if such things happen we are 3-1 and we have the ammunition to take aim. I only fear for out other votes that we need secure which that is being Bodhi, Ali, Kelsey, and Austin. I need all 4 of them to stay safe but I have a smart feeling that ain't gonna happen. But I still stand on what I said last time in that I'm in a good spot and I don't have to do much bullshit or manipulating just yet. I showed I can be sneaky as well as cutthroat when I need to be but I'm good for now.

[theworstbob]

yellin’ at songs: week thirty

brief reviews of the songs that debuted on the 8.2.1997, 8.4.2007, and 8.5.2017 editions of the billboard hot 100

8.2.1997

4) "Mo Money Mo Problems," by The Notorious B.I.G. ft./Puff Daddy & Mase

WELCOME BACK. I am refreshed, I have had a nice few days away from pop music, I got that sweet sub-2:30 in LTTP rando, and I'm coming back to this song, which, hey. It's a classic! I have nothing to add to the discussion around this song. This is one of the most enjoyable pop songs ever made, one of the most enjoyable rap songs ever made, people at the peak of their talents figuring out a magical way to rhyme over an incredible beat. Seriously, "I'm Coming Out" is one of the best songs ever made, and this improves on the foundation, and it's just this beautiful, magical place. It's so good. I am incapable of saying anything constructive in regards to this song. They nailed it. I don’t need to tell you how they nailed it because you can hear how they nailed it.

45) "Coco Jamboo," by Mr. President

So my opinion on this song is that I would have rather not listened to it, but a cursory glance of their Wikipedia page shows that this was a #1 single in Sweden. It reigned for five weeks in the fall of 1996, and it was preceded by "Wannabe" and  followed by a song from a band called E-Type named "Free Like a Flying Demon." You know what kind of owns? "Free Like a Flying Demon." It's not quite what I wanted "Free Like a Flying Demon" to sound like, I thought Sweden was still willing to make a #1 hit out of the occasional bitchin' metal jam (I'm probably thinking of Norway, those freaks mosh), but this sounds like a decent Depeche Mode outtake.

72) "Do You Like This," by Rome

Enh! I've had worse. Thank you for asking me how your song was! This review was much easier to write with the prompt! I also appreciate the way this dude is passionately drawing in every single breath. He is inhaling with PURPOSE. He feels these feelings so intensely, he has to gulp in all the oxygen he can so he can properly express his feelings. Also at one point he goes "nnnnnn" for seven seconds. This is the ur-R&B dude song.

75) "Can We," by SWV ft./Missy Elliott

The soundtrack for Booty Call has two unforgettable cuts, both in vastly different ways from each other. This is more in step with what I expected from the Booty Call soundtrack, just a smooth song asking if y'all DTF. Not that song that was just straight-up porn, just a song that sounds like the last half hour at a club and a last-ditch effort to make something happen. I like that. Especially after Rome being over-dramatic, I'm way into a song that's just, "I dunno, it's just sex. Y'all wanna do it or no?"

81) "Fix," by BLACKstreet ft./Ol' Dirty Bastard

WHAT IS THIS I LOVE THIS. HELL YEAH. I am so, so appreciative that BLACKstreet was willing to go on this adventure, and that Ol' Dirty was willing to hop on the bus with them. This was pretty amazing, though, hey, I'll cop to being a sucker for rock guitars where there typically aren't rock guitars. Slash did things! Slash toolded around in the studio for ten minutes and did enough amazing things to be featured in the song! This was hella fun, I hope more R&B artists made hard rock jams in 1997. I want to live in a world where I don't just hear Rome a thousand more times, I wanna hear this overtake Rome and his ilk for the definitive '90s R&B song.

90) "Can't Get You out of My Mind," by Lil' Suzy

Hey! You know how I haven't been that into Europop? You know how I've been enduring these garbage dance songs for the sake of experiencing the odd "Fulton Street" or "Fix?" GUESS WHAT, THIS WHITE GIRL FROM NEW YORK JUST DROPPED CULTURAL APPROPRIATION INTO THE MIX. I know I made fun of "It's Alright, It's OK," but I would listen to a thousand white girl journal entries before I listened to some girl from Brooklyn pretend she's from Hamburg.

You know what I forgot to do last week? The Top 20s! Here’s what 1997 looks like through 30 weeks. 20) "Step by Step," by Whitney Houston (3.15) 19) "Can We," by SWV ft./Missy Elliott (8.2) 18) "On and On," by Erykah Badu (1.25) 17) "I Want You," by Savage Garden (3.1) 16) "It Must Be Love," by Robin S. (5.24) 15) "Smokin' Me Out," by Warren G ft./Ronald Isley (6.21) 14) "Fix," by BLACKstreet ft./Ol' Dirty Bastard (8.2) 13) "Silent All These Years," by Tori Amos (3.22) 12) "What They Do," by The Roots (1.11) 11) "Step Into a World (Rapture's Delight)," by KRS-One (4.5) 10) "I'm Not Feeling You," by Yvette Michele (2.22) 9) "Bill," by Peggy Scott-Adams (3.29) 8) "Just Another Case," by CRU ft./Slick Rick (7.5) 7) "I'll Be," by Foxy Brown ft./Jay-Z (2.15) 6) "Felton St.," Leschea (6.14) 5) "Bitch," by Meredith Brooks (4.26) 4) "Mo Money, Mo Problems," by The Notorious B.I.G. ft./Puff Daddy & Mase (8.2) 3) "Return of the Mack," by Mark Morrison (3.1) 2) "Hypnotize," by The Notorious B.I.G. (4.26) 1) "Not Tonight (Ladies' Night Remix)," by Lil Kim ft./Angie Martinez, Left Eye, Da Brat & Missy Elliott (7.12)

8.4.2007

6) "What Time Is It," from the cast of High School Musical 2

Given that there will be hella High School Musical 2 in this space four weeks from now, I'd like to reserve the right to have a comment on High School Musical 2 until such a time that it is appropriate. This song is fun! Make sure to come back in four weeks to hear me say that again but longer!

7) "Sorry, Blame it on Me," Akon

...Did anyone else notice that Akon released an album in 2017? In this calendar year! I know it's hard to keep track of alll the things that are happening, what with the president yelling about how he can pardon himself and all, but I went to the AZLyrics page to clarify some of the lyrics, to, y'know, make fun of this shitty song where Akon is only passively-aggressively taking the blame ("even though the blame's on you/you can put the blame on me" christ dude either own your shit or don't), but there's an Akon album called Stadium with the number 2017 in parentheses next to it and song titles under it! The songs have lyrics! One song has a Ludacris feature! Oh, man. This is one album I am not going to listen to! (Follow-up: looks like it’s yet to be released. I am sorry for teasing you like this, I know how much you have been looking forward to hearing new Akon.)

85) "Ready, Set, Don't Go," Billy Cyrus

Everything about this song is gross and awful and I hate that it exists and I hate how it was brought to existence and I wish I had watched a lyric video instead of the music video because I hate looking at this freeloader's face. "This is where I don't say what I want so bad to say." YOU RELEASED THIS SONG TO RADIO. SHE CAN HEAR YOU. JUST NAME THE SONG "I DESIRE ATTENTION AND AM SO VERY HAPPY MY DAUGHTER ENDED UP BEIN' FAMOUS."

88) "You Can't Stop the Beat," from the cast of Hairspray

In 2007, there were multiple feature-length musical comedies featuring Zac Efron. It's not that we didn't have anyone else that could sing and dance while acting. We just decided to let Zac Efron have a go at it. Also, while I have not seen this film (either original or remake, would much rather see the original), I am so glad it exists. So, so very glad there is room in some subculture for John Travolta in drag and a fat suit.

89) "Bed," J. Holiday

Dipping back into 2007 R&B is weird after so much 1997 R&B because I have to come up with something different to say than "'90s R&B, amirite?" This song, though, it's always been a personal favorite. It's over-the-top, but it never feels silly, settles in this nice groove where it's this ridiculous song about fucking. It's probably a mid-tier '90s R&B song, but this was kind of the best 2007 had to offer; I'm not sure why else I'd remember it if it weren't the among the strongest things R&B had to offer that year. Fun fact! J. Holiday's most recent single is called "After We Fuck." Getting better with age like a fine, horny wine.

90) "Can't Leave 'Em Alone," Ciara ft./50 Cent

This is nice! (many hours pass) Nope, nope, still haven't formed any grander opinion on this song. Ciara whispers prettily, and Fiddy doesn't do anything to make the song less chill. Real quick? Team? Team? Real quick? I don't mean to presume, but I'm pretty sure the niceness of this song means the best song to debut on the Billboard chart the week of 4 August 2007 was "You Can't Stop the Beat." Guys, I know I've had my issues with 2017's music, but that's because it's boring. There's nothing wrong with boring, but the problem ends up being that the songs are just there, they're incredibly average. 2007 hasn't been funky in weeks. It's just been bad. Like, look at next week: you have "Stronger," which is a classic, but then three county dudes and whatever "Hood Figga" is gonna end up being. It's easy to yell at 2017 because it's new and we want it to be better, and we can yell at 1997 because of the occasional dip into horrible Eurodance, but I don't think any of the three years has wasted more of my time with songs that just blandly exist than 2007.

97) "Stranger," Hilary Duff

It's like someone decided to take "Beautiful Liar" and add 100% more of everything. Honestly, if they're gonna follow up "With Love" with this, I should be allowed to make whatever mean joke I made in the "With Love" review. If they're not gonna put any effort into their music, I shouldn't have to put effort into the review. (I think I've used that line in a previous review, so look at that, I'm doing it anyway, probably!)

99) "Online," Brad Paisley

This is one of the best country songs about catfishing in existence, as well as the only country song about the internet version of catfishing. This is a fine companion piece for "High Maintenance Woman," and my headcanon is that the maintenance man is also the main character of this song. I will never not appreciate Brad Paisley playing guitar and dad jokes, I can appreciate this very dad summary of how the internet works, and you KNOW your boy appreciates any song with a tuba section, however brief. It won't keep a cover of a 20-year-old musical closer from being the best 2007 song of the week, but it's a song with some degree of depth (and any degree of sweet, sweet tuba) that we can enjoy, and that's kinda "best-case scenario" territory with 2007 songs.

It has been nearly two months since we updated the 2007 Top 20. Since then, one new song has been added. 20) "Lip Gloss," by Lil Mama (6.9.2007) 19) "I Don't Wanna Stop," by Ozzy Osbourne (5.26.2007) 18) "Stolen," by Dashboard Confessional (4.21.2007) 17) "Beautiful Liar," by Beyonce & Shakira (3.31.2007) 16) "Cupid's Chokehold," by Gym Class Heroes ft./Patrick Stump (1.13.2007) 15) "The River," by Good Charlotte ft./M. Shadows & Synyster Gates (2.10.2007) 14) "Say OK," by Vanessa Hudgens (2.17.2007) 13) "Alyssa Lies," by Jason Michael Carroll (1.13.2007) 12) "Never Again," by Kelly Clarkson (5.12.2007) 11) "Can't Tell Me Nothing," by Kanye West (6.16.2007) 10) "Get Buck," by Young Buck (4.14.2007) 9) "And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going," by Jennifer Hudson (1.13.2007) 8) "Thnks fr th Mmrs," by Fall Out Boy (4.28.2007) 7) "Candyman," by Christina Aguilera (1.13.2007) 6) "Misery Business," by Paramore (7.21.2007) 5) "Because of You," by Ne-Yo (3.17.2007) 4) "Umbrella," by Rihanna ft./Jay-Z (4.28.2007) 3) "Beautiful Flower," by India.Arie (6.16.2007) 2) "Dashboard," by Modest Mouse (2.17.2007) 1) "The Story," by Brandi Carlile (4.28.2007)

8.5.2017

75) "A Lie," by French Montana ft./The Weeknd & Max B

Like, this is what I mean when I say 2017 is incredibly average. I remember mostly enjoying the two French Montana songs on the chart, but I don't remember anything that happened in these songs. They don't do anything. They just exist, and they're pleasant to listen to, but no one's taking any risks. There's nothing wrong with a B-, B- is still above-average, but my stars, why settle? Does no one want an A? What are we doing here. What was I supposed to hear in this song to make me believe there are only 74 songs currently in existence which best encapsulate the present moment. It's not bad, I just want something to care about.

86) "Jerika," by Jake Paul & Erika Costell ft./Uncle Kade

This is a love song by a man who, every time he has ever seen any banana in his life, will chuckle, point, and say, "Penis." If I could go back in time and stop myself from starting this project, I would not, because my life is better for having "Felton St." and "Bill" and "Get Buck" and "It Ain't Me" in it, but I would give that time machine a long, long look before deciding not to board.

91) "Young Dumb & Broke," by Khalid

Absolutely fuck this song. Fuck this PBR'n'B version of an anthem. Fuck this dude's ironic detachment, fuck this go nowhere track, fuck that dumb Rodney Dangerfield-ass joke in the second verse, fuck whoever told this dude he was complex, and fuck the naked appeal to the #teens. American Teen. Do #teens actually listen to media with "teen" in the title? I mean, they must, they've been making songs with "teen" in the title since before Billboard published charts, but this song isn't for teens as it is for pretentious music writers who want to write thinkpieces about the state of R&B. This stupid song probably got an entire Slate article published about it by now, and he's only 19 for seven more months, and boy, won't it be a drag when he can no longer substitute his age for an identiy. What a fucking bore.

96) "Woman," by Kesha ft./The Dap-Kings Horns

Y'ALL, FUCK YEAH. Like, last week's song was last week's song, and I respect that it needed to be made. But you know what I like? I like when someone shouts about how happy they are to be alive over a saucy horn section, AND GOT DAMN, THIS DELIVERED ON THE PROMISE OF THE TITLE. Everything about this is good and pure and should be enjoyed without reservation and a daily fixture at every karaoke bar and shouted from the top of every mountain simultaneously and goddamnit it's not gonna be on the chart next week, is it. (This is only gonna be #18 on the list. When 2017 is on, it is goddamned ON, and that's what makes enduring the French Montanas and Khalids such a chore, because I know they can do better! They have done better, and frequently!) But man, this song, I am in love with the Scissor Sisters-y breakdown, I am going to buy space on the Jumbotron at a baseball game to propose to that breakdown, this song muthafuckin' rules.

Seriously tho the 2017 Top 20? 20) "Felices los 4," by Maluma (6.3) 19) "Bodak Yellow," by Cardi B (7.22) 18) "Woman," by Kesha ft./The Dap-Kings Horns (8.5) 17) "Smile," by Jay-Z ft./Gloria Carter (7.29) 16) "Love Galore," by SZA ft./Travis Scott (7.1) 15) "Bad Liar," by Selena Gomez (6.3) 14) "DNA." by Kendrick Lamar (5.6) 13) "It Ain't Me," by Kygo x Selena Gomez (3.4) 12) "Craving You," by Thomas Rhett ft./Maren Morris (4.22) 11) "That's What I Like," by Bruno Mars (3.4) 10) "Chanel," by Frank Ocean ft./A$AP Rocky (4.1) 9) "Strangers," by Halsey ft./Lauren Jauregui (6.17) 8) "Either Way," by Chris Stapleton (5.27) 7) "Run Up," by Major Lazer ft./PARTYNEXTDOOR & Nicki Minaj (2.18) 6) "Green Light," by Lorde (3.18) 5) "ELEMENT." by Kendrick Lamar (5.6) 4) "Despacito," by Luis Fonsi ft./Daddy Yankee (2.4) 3) "Issues," by Julia Michaels (2.11) 2) "iSpy," by KYLE ft./Lil Yachty (1.14) 1) "Hard Times," by Paramore (5.13) There’s been hella jams in 2017, like there’s a reason it and ‘97 are tied in the standings (SPOILERTH), but man, you just get tired of hearing the same shit all the time, y’know?

Won won the week?

1997 won this week incredibly hard. 2017 put up a good fight at the end, but man, 1997 started strong and never looked back.

Current standings: 1997: 11 2017: 11 2007: 8 2007 is lagging behind, but next week is “Stronger” week, and 1997 doesn’t look to be lining up the strongest contenders, though I could be wrong and Nastyboy Kiick could be ready to dazzle me. What will 2017 bring to the table, and can Kanye carry a bunch of schmucks to a W? Find out!