#of the world. okay i'm at peace now i'm not annoyed anymore
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speaking of interpretations i don't like i hateeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee the idea that lifesteal characters are somehow different people or lose memories between seasons i hate it so bad
#i didn't like it with life series either AGRHGHGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG#m#lifesteal#my blog i get to complain once in a while#i'm just such a hater of anything that requires you to start ignoring the way people actually act/the actual relation of player to game#like zam saying he thinks of it like his characters are separate between seasons is whatever but like. vitalasy for example still Tries#to have conversations with him about s4 in s5. his refusal to engage with those conversations doesn't really make any sense if he's#somehow a zam who did not experience those things ... and it's so much more interesting and doesn't require you to start jumping through#hoops if he does remember and is Choosing not to engage#okay at the end of the day my thing is this: he can think that and act like that if he wants but he can't dictate whether or not anybody#else treats it the same way because the real relationship of player to game is that you Are always the same person and you Did experience#those things so any situation where you try to act like that stuff didn't happen just becomes a character trait rather than a material fact#of the world. okay i'm at peace now i'm not annoyed anymore
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A valid excuse
Floyd x gn!reader
I have been consumed by tweel brainrot there is no turning back
Anyways here's something i thought of in 5 mins lfmaooo
You were awakened from your peaceful slumber by loud and oddly agressive knocking at the door to Ramshackle dorm.
What in the world? Who is trying to visit at this hour?
You groan, gently pushing Grim off you and slowly making your way to the door to find out who your late night visitor is.
"Finally..." Floyd mumbles when the door reveals your slouched figure. He makes a mental note of how you look in your sleepwear.
"...Floyd?" You mumble sleepily, hoping you didn't say the wrong twin's name. It's kind of hard to tell which one it is in the dark.
"You sure took your sweet time answering the door, Shrimpy." He invited himself in, casually walking past you into the lounge . Yup, it's definitely Floyd.
"Why are you here?" You yawned.
He squeezed you really hard all of a sudden, which woke you up almost instantly. You felt your bones cracking, you swear. Way more effective than an alarm clock. Or Grim.
"I had a nightmare... Can I sleep in your bed?" He pouted at you almost comically.
"That's why you came banging on my door at 2 AM?" You raised a brow at him, slightly annoyed. And besides, Floyd wasn't even your boyfriend or anything. He's just that one guy who gets really excited when he sees you for some reason. Why is he coming to you with this overly childish request? Jade works just fine.
His pout increased and he squeezed you even harder. As a warning, no doubt.
Seems there's no way out of this...
"Okay, okay- Fine-" you sounded strained due to your innability to breathe. You kinda don't want to die because of Floyd's squeezing, though it would certainly be a unique way to go.
"Yay~" he let go of you, prancing over to your bedroom like an excited child.
You followed behind him, worried that he might throw Grim out the window to make space for himself. If there's one thing you know about Floyd, it's that he's unpredictable. Not that that's a bad thing, you just don't want to end up with catlike casualty tonight.
"Ehhhh, why is Sealie all cuddled up on your bed?" he sounded offended, like someone just took his well deserved space.
"...He always is." you smile to yourself, thinking of how Grim is actually kinda like a real cat when he's all curled up by your side. You always feel the urge to pet him when he's like that.
Floyd takes a step forward (to "remove" Grim, no doubt) but you quickly pick up Grim and place him down on the rocking chair to prevent a premature death. Grim so owes you for this later.
"Here, the bed's all yours." you point to it somewhat nervously, watching his expression soften. I mean, were you seriously just going to let him sleep with you? You're honestly so tired you don't even care anymore.
He flops down on the bed unceremoniously, waiting for you to join him. As soon as you do, he hugs you tightly. "My dream was soooo bad... It was just horrible..." he mumbled into you with an overly dramatic undertone.
You still have no idea if the nightmare was just an excuse or if he actually had one. Either way, he is squeezing you right now and seems quite satisfied. You let your eyes slip closed.
"Wanna tell me what it was about?" you whisper.
"Later... I feel like squishing you forever for now..." he swung one of his lanky legs over you, sighing happily.
"You know Azul will get mad at you if you squish me forever, right? Cuz you won't show up to work..." you surrender yourself into his embrace fully, noting how smooth his arms are.
"I don't really care, to be honest...."
You suddenly felt a kiss on your cheek and you jolted slightly. Did Floyd just kiss you?
No, no. That was definitely just your imagination. You're half asleep, after all.
it's late at night as i'm proofreading this and i just got a rook card when i wanted the vil one😭😭😭😭😭😭my unluckiness knows no bounds
#˗ˏˋ ★ ♡ 「Wolfie’s other works」 ♡ ★ ˎˊ˗#twisted wonderland x yuu#twisted wonderland x you#disney twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland x reader#twisted wonderland#twst x y/n#twst x yuu#twst x mc#twst x you#twst x reader#floyd leech x reader#floyd leech x yuu#floyd leech x y/n#floyd x reader#floyd leech#leech brothers#floyd twisted wonderland#floyd twst
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cedar
pairing - percy jackson x fem!reader.
summary - saying goodbye is hard, especially, when you still can't accept the fact that it has ended. she thought it was the right thing, but she still forgets he isn't hers. was it really for the best?
warnings - angst, readers cabin not specified, annoying gurls trying to steal our man.
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a/n: my first percy jackson fic, yey!!! i hope u guys enjoy, please, let me know if you would like a part2, have a nice day :)
y/n zoned out, annabeth long forgotten, when she saw some new girls approach percy, who was currently teaching a camper from hermes cabin how to hold a sword correctly.
the girl felt her chest tighten at the sight.
one girl flipping her hair, another giggling, both making percy awkwardly blush. she knew that he wouldn't just ignore them or send them away, it's percy jackson, he tried to help everyone, so when one girl motioned to a sword, y/n realized that she was asking for lessons, too, and percy of course nodded.
but then again, she couldn't feel this type of way.
her mind went to the conversation that they both had 7 months ago. she forgot that he isn't hers anymore. she forgot that she called it off and percy, well, he didn't say anything, just agreed.
"i need some space," y/n whispered, as she tried not to look at the boy in front of her.
these past months have been hard. lonely nights, canceled dates, and red eyes. not only was being a demigod hard, but two teenagers with this destiny being in love was even harder.
the relationship had to be put aside because of the quests, monsters, and just duties as a half blood and a child. not to mention that percy jackson, being poseidons' son, had to fulfill everyone's expectations and desires, that way leaving the person he loves, y/n y/l/n, behind.
he tried to reach for her hand, but she just stepped back, "okay, we can just get away. i mean, go somewhere for the summer, not to camp, but-
she shook her head, knowing that it wasn't possible, the camp half blood was the safest place for them, but the boy still tried, "let's go to greece! the sun, the ocean, you always wanted to, it could be-"
"no," she stopped him, "percy, we just need a break from us... this," she swallowed, "this isn't working right now."
and just like that, percy jackson felt his heart break into a million peaces.
the hero could save everyone, figure things out, help others, but he couldn't fix the distance and the hurt that had grown between them.
y/n hadn't realized that she hadn't stopped looking until percy turned his head and their eyes locked.
it may seem cliché, but time stopped.
those eyes used to make her feel loved. seen. they made her feel like the only girl in the world. he made her feel everything.
she felt her face go hot, feeling her breathing go heavier. percy didn't look away, his own face relaxing, as he saw the beautiful girl. he gave her a small smile, but she just looked away.
"he misses you," annabeth said, besides the girl.
"hm."
"y/n, you should tal-"
the girl stood up, "i'm gonna go check if the new campers need some help with the strawberries."
and just like that, she walked away before annabeth could say anything. her heart felt heavy, it hurt to be near him, it hurt to look him in the eye. she couldn't.
but percy couldn't forget her. them. he wouldn't. his green eyes watched her, the girl still on his mind.
#percy jackson and the heroes of olympus#percy jackson#percy jackson x reader#percy jackon and the olympians#percy jackson x you#percy jackson x y/n#percy jackson blurb#percy jackson angst#percy jackson fic#annabeth chase#percy jackson imagine#demigod#camp halfblood#pjo#pjo fandom#pjo fanfic#pjo x reader#pjo x you#pjo x y/n
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LIFE'S HARD WHEN YOU'RE INLOVE ─
─ WITH RIN ITOSHI !!
At a certain time, when the sun is down and the moon is up, you normally will hear the sounds of sleeping. That peaceful feeling of letting go of everything while regenerating your energy is a feeling that everyone loves. Especially yourself, yet you're here up at 3:49 AM, re-reading that one part in the book where the character "fell in-love".
"Her mind goes blank everytime she sees him.. // Thoughts cannot formulate anymore.. // Before she knew it, she had already fell.."
Your eyes scanned the words, reading what it feels like to fall in-love. So before, what you felt wasn't love, it didn't feel like how it is in the book. So when will you fall in-love? Even though you always say these simple words, "Relationships are too much work..", but sometimes, a girl can only just dream.
The darkness that surrounds your room blackens out your thoughts from the outside world, leaving you alone in your bed, under your blanket with your phone light, showing you the words you wished, secretly wished, to feel one day.
And so, with those thoughts the darkness swallowed you entirely, leaving you to dream with romance on your mind.
It has been 5 minutes since your alarm went off but finally, it reached your ears causing you to awaken from your slumber. A little bit of drool pooled around one spot on your bed as you realized that the posture you fell asleep on, caused your mouth to hang a bit.
The sun from your window gave you some sort of guide to understand your surroundings a bit better. A little too good actually..
"Why can I.." you mumbled, touching your face until you finally got to your eyes, feeling your frames. You groaned, rising from your position, leaving the open book on your bed as you reached for the phone next to it.
Finally, the alarming sound was gone and now it was just silence. It didn't help that you haven't achieved your full 8 hours of sleep, rather you got 3 hours this time.
Staring off into the distance of your room, debating if you should go back to sleep, or get ready for school. Maybe checking your socials will help a bit..
So you opened Instagram, to shake the sleepiness off but after two scrolls..
Back into that position you woke up in! Even with the glasses on.
"There's no way in hell I'm gonna deal with this again." An annoyed Reo said. Here he is, glaring at you with his hands on his hips, ignoring the boy next to you.
It was now 7:00 AM and Reo had a time waking the both of you, which is normal and this "talk" as well is normal. Yet he always ignores the boy..
Though he always says "Thanks to you both, my mornings aren't perfect.", or something so, both you and Seishiro were too busy trying not to sleep through his rants.
After the very normal morning routine in your home with the boys, you three were finally in school. Reo and Sei said their goodbyes as they left to go to their class while leaving you alone to enter into yours.
You placed your items on your table, then..
"Rise and shine! No sleeping here!!" A voice stopped her from resting her head on the desk.
Your eyes shifted from the desk under you, to your one and only best friends! Meguru and Yoichi!!
"Are you okay? You look kinda.." Yoichi started, pulling up a chair to sit next to you but his eyes never left your face.
A pout was formed as you thought about how many hours of precious sleep you lost.
Meguru sat himself on your desk, patting your head.
"You look kinda dead!" Meguru boldly pointed out.
"I stayed up until 3.." You mumbled. The patting ceased and confused looks shot at you.
The duo looked at each other and then at you.
"Are you depressed?"
"..What."
"Are you sick?"
The sudden wave of questions caused your eyebrows to knit together in confusion as you stared back at them.
"Why are you asking me these questions..?" You glared at them.
They looked back at you as if you asked the most insane question ever.
"Well um, you're the only person we know who sleeps longer than 8 hours." Meguru started, as Yoichi supported him.
"We rarely see you stay up, almost never." He said.
Now that you think about it, they do have a point. You're not the one to stay up, mostly just sleeping through everything.
"Oh I was up thinking about love." You simply stated.
And with that bomb-dropped sentence, the boys went dead silent. Until Meguru started laughing.
"WHAT'S SO FUNNY?" You lashed out, standing up from your seat.
"Seems like she's not sleepy anymore.." Yoichi mumbled.. "She sounds grumpy though.." He continued.
Meguru on the other hand had to stop himself from falling off the table, while laughing. You stared at him for a while, with a scowl on your face, waiting for him to stop laughing.
Yoichi, who held a small smile on his face, watched how his friends interacted with each other.
"I won't say it's funny but it's not normal for you." He said, trying to not turn the situation into a funny one.
"Yeah I know I was just thinking, okay?" You mumbled, finding yourself back in your seat, watching as Meguru had finally died down.
His eyes landed on you, giggling a bit at the idea, which caused you to form a small pout on your face. You rolled your eyes and sighed, dropping your head softly on his lap, only because he was on your desk.
"I'm sorry for laughing..!" He softly exclaimed, petting your head that rests on his lap. His habit of petting your head always seems to cheer you up or calm down. Another one is Yoichi's hugs. Those seem to be your favorite.
Twisting your head on his lap, only to see who had entered the classroom thus far, you began to stare at a boy. He wasn't looking in your direction but something about his side view seems.. capturing.
The more you stared, the more Meguru petted your head, the more you drifted off into the dreamland and no one seemed to stop you this time, accepting the duty of waking you up when it's class time.
However, that same boy had noticed your staring. His eyebrows knitted together in confusion yet he shook it off as he saw that you were falling asleep.
## LIFE'S HARD WHEN YOU'RE INLOVE. --
╴“ WITH RIN ITOSHI?? „
ฅ^._.^ฅ : some things about y/n !! she mostly sleeps through the day, only does stuff IF needed !! with her given gift of being effortlessly smart , all she does in her free time is : nap , eat , sleep. hmm what if.. one day y/n develops a crush and now has to ACTUALLY work to achieve a goal ? : date rin itoshi !!
2 // 4
TAGLIST!!: @deezy12299 @kuroronana (OPEN)
-`♥︎´- for this story, i'm trying a something new, which includes words/phrases, foods and hometowns from japan and germany. if there's any errors please point it out !
-`♥︎´- word count : 1k
#imraeswork#imraespace -♡#rin itoshi#blue lock#rin itoshi x reader#rin x reader#blue lock x reader#rin itoshi x you#rin itoshi x y/n#meguru bachira#isagi yoichi#chigiri hyoma#nagi seishiro#reo mikage#blue lock smau#smau#rin itoshi smau#fluff#crack#angst#rin smau#itoshi#x reader#x female reader#rin itoshi fluff#bllk#bllk x reader#bllk kaiser#rin itoshi crack#rin itoshi angst
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You know what do you think of hanza cancelling her own comic that is the guy upstairs? Like for me,I really really hope she's okay. And I know blacklightjack(he make a video about this) and the line he says about artists need to grow a thicker skin is just. I'm sorry like,look I get what he's saying but hanza have to cancel the comic because of toxic shippers. Sure,you can just ignore them and pretend they don't exist but they will still still still annoy you and h*rass you to the point you can't take it anymore and have to cancel the comic because of the whole goddamn toxic fanbase.
(as a Malaysian myself,I need to say this,I really hope hanza is alright. And in my language saya harap dia dapat bantuan Dan menjaga kesihatan sendiri)
So...
sigh I feel like this isn't the answer or essay you expected but I hope you're open to at least hearing it out all the same.
I do not think Hanza handled the situation in a way that benefitted her as a creator or her audience of people who genuinely love her work.
I DO think she was justified to be pissed off with the people harassing her. Those people suck ass and they're the definition of "this is why we can't have nice things."
But like... the notion of "you need to grow thicker skin" is true in being a creator who puts their work out into the world for an audience. Hear me out, this does NOT mean "creators aren't allowed to have feelings". But it does mean that you have to find peace with the fact that there are gonna be weirdos and assholes who take shit too far within your community. You don't necessarily deserve that. But you can't give those people power over you by going scorched earth in the way that Hanza did, because who does it really benefit? Hanza is now out a job and she's soiled her own reputation with her audience by basically going "FINE, because of these few people who were shit, NO ONE gets to have a good time!" And that's just... not a productive or healthy way to deal with these issues because it's just doing what those trolls and shitheads likely wanted. They wanted a reaction out of her, and she delivered it to them on a silver platter.
Like, I think of the dumbasses complaining about Hanza "taking advantage of the dark romance community" (she didn't, she just made a horror thriller comic that they felt entitled to see romance in) and guess what? Now those dumbasses have power over here because she ended the comic and in their heads, I'm sure they're thinking "good riddance". By choosing to not only end her comic, but spoil it entirely for her fans who were there in good faith, Hanza gave power to the people who weren't even a part of her target audience to begin with.
I do think it's ironic if people assume I'd automatically boo the "grow thicker skin" mantra because like, y'all... many of my complaints here are literally about people like Rachel who behave badly with their audience and desperately needed to grow thicker skin. In a lot of ways she's not even reacting to direct harassers, she's reacting to people simply discussing her comic in their own spaces which aren't mean for her. If she spoiled the ending of LO for her fans and ended the comic prematurely, I would feel awful, but... it still would have been her decision at the end of the day that she'd have to stand by and take responsibility for.
I think, at best, if I were to give her any unsolicited advice, she should have just put the comic on hiatus, taken a break, focused on her mental health and given herself enough distance to ask herself if she wanted to continue TGU. Maybe it still would have ended the same way, but at least she would have given herself the time and space to heal and rationalize her choices.
Instead, by choosing the nuclear option of spoiling the series for her readers and axing the comic - just to backpedal and go back to "no no it's just an indefinite hiatus!" - she gave up her power to the people who were harassing her. She reacted in a way that gave them power over her, not herself over them.
And I say this as someone who's currently on an indefinite hiatus with their main project, which I still have not spoiled for the 5 readers I have, despite the fact that I have zero clue when I'll return or if I'll even be able to. Whether or not Cyra and co. break out of the Reaper Society is now a 2 year old question.
I say this all as someone who has been harassed and is still harassed for doing what I wanna do. My first ever webcomic website when I was like 17 used to get emails and comments from shitty classmates and other local yokels who knew of me and wanted to pick fights over a teenager's dumb lil' gag comics. I kept making those comics anyways for myself and for the people who did like reading them, until I was ready to drop the comic on my own terms and move onto my next project, which would be Reaper. Reaper also got a lot of nonsense complaints and harassment. As did my fanfiction projects, as did my digital art, as did everything that I've ever put out into the world through the Internet, because the Internet just sucks for everyone always and then you die 🤣
And now, 10+ years later, I get the occasional "you're a shitty talentless person who isn't gonna amount to anything and yaddayaddayadda" which, to be fair, is a reaction from the folks who are unhappy with my intentions to make a Lore Olympus rewrite comic!
But I'm not going to give them power over me by stopping. I have a story I want to tell and if I stopped telling that story due to the shitty things they had to say and do, then I would be punishing myself and punishing my audience for the actions of a few bad apples. I do not deserve to have those abusive actions targeted at me (though they surely do and that's on them) and I do not have to put up with it, but I genuinely would not be able to live with myself if I gave them power over me by reacting in such an explosive way that my bloody remains land on everyone around me, including the people who were supportive and loved my work along the way.
That said, I also don't know to what extent Hanza was harassed. I've seen people claim she was doxxed, but have yet to see any evidence of that. I have seen people claim she got death threats, but Hanza hasn't shown anything to back that up. I'm going to assume the best of her that the harassment must have gotten pretty fucking bad for her to want to quit, and again, that is justified, and I cannot in any way use my experiences as a way to diminish hers. Maybe she just flat out isn't interested in making TGU anymore which... I can definitely say I relate to that, too.
There's this sort of mindfulness technique in stress and emotional management where you have to recognize that other people's actions are NOT your responsibility, but your REACTION is, because your reaction is what you can control and have power over.
Rachel Smythe finished LO in spite of what wackjobs like me said (and still say) about her and she has power in that perseverance, power that wackjobs like me cannot and *should* not try to take away from her.
mongie decided Webtoons was not suited for her work and vision and decided to put the comic on hiatus until she could get her distribution rights back and continue Let's Play on another platform. She has power in that decision and integrity, power that Webtoons cannot take away from her.
Whether or not you like my work, whatever opinion you have of it that you're entitled to, I have power in knowing that I started a project that I now love dearly and can take pride in, and has brought closure to people like me who were left disappointed by LO. I have power in that stubbornness and refusal to let other people determine what I'm capable of.
Even if you remove the external influence of the audience from the picture, we all have power as creators that we need to harness and take ownership in.
By going nuclear and spoiling her comic for her audience and ending it entirely, Hanza may have gotten the short term satisfaction of turning the school bus around to go back home, but she still disrespected herself and robbed herself of her own power as a creator which will ultimately stick with her far more than it will the harassers who will inevitably move on to some other target and forget she even existed. And that's a decision that she has to live with.
The harassers got under Hanza's skin and gave her more than enough reason to feel frustrated. But they did not choose to spoil and end the comic. She did. And she is ultimately the only one who will have to live with the consequences of that.
I do hope she's okay and that she's getting the time and space she needs to heal from this. If this truly is the outcome that she feels gives her the most power and the ends justified the means for her, I hope she found strength in it, regardless of the opinions of people like myself that ultimately should not matter to her. I hope the people harassing her get what's coming for them whether it be actually getting called out or just the universe delivering karmic retribution on them. I hope Hanza can find joy and peace again either in TGU or whatever project she pursues next. But most importantly, I hope she finds the confidence and power she needs to stick to her guns and create what she wants to create, unapologetically.
"Growing thicker skin" doesn't mean we as creators have to be comfortable with abuse - it just means we need to do ourselves the honor and favor of making decisions that give ourselves power rather than giving it away to the abusers who do not have to live our lives at the end of it all.
And that is my very big bag of cents on that.
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Can I request a fyodor x reader who’s a photographer? Taking photos of natural scenery and usually always has a prompt to go by, but also tends to beat themselves up about their work and maybe something along the lines of them saying they hate their work? Sorry if that’s too specific 🫶
hello anon! don't worry, it's fine!! this request surprised me a bit, but it let me open up to an idea. i hope i did okay, thank you for requesting ♡
a keen eye needs a keen heart Fyodor D. x photographer reader
involves -- domestic relationship, slight parallelism if you can spot it ^^
offering -- JAEHYUN, d.ear - try again (Instrumental ver)
Click after silence, silence after click.
It is, by this point, all you can only hear in these engulfed moments of life being copied in a digital showcase. It's as if you're shrinking nature into tiny, portable photographs—and to you, you find it endearing.
Nowadays, many humans have pushed the Earth they can not live without as some topic to either mingle or discard; however, there were still some people who truly show affection for it. One of them being you.
Photography has been your door, the natural scenery of this world being the contents. With the prompts who linger in your head from photo to photo like the wind enveloping you peace in your space, there has yet to be a talent and skill to which makes you feel the same passion as photography has.
Although... sometimes, it can be very overbearing to shoulder.
The burden of habits were, inherently, starting to flood you. While you had no desire to give up on what you're good at, you ended up doing the same things everyday.
At this point, you wouldn't be surprised if you woke up and find your fingers already meeting the camera, waiting for your head to think up a prompt.
It's almost like you weren't thinking anymore, just doing.
..
Cracking your train of thoughts back to reality from the unlooked-for process of zoning out—a soft groan finally cuts through the silence as not even, perhaps, a stray animal crumbles the fallen leaves to accompany you from the quiet.
You've been snapping photos of the dark forest trees that you were more than sure are enough already. You still need to edit them later, but for now...
"I need to go find Fedya." You mumble, glancing at your camera one last time before you carefully put it back in your bag, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear while you began to walk.
You weren't alone in this forest. Your boyfriend—Fyodor, was also following you to momentarily keep you company before he gave you some alone time.
You didn't have a solid lead of where he could be now, but he couldn't of gone that far..
"I'm here, moya milaya." Till suddenly a familiar voice hugs your cold ears, making your body turn as you see him. The male with a fluffy ushanka, the white of his clothing topped by his long black cloak. Fyodor's voice and appearance makes your bittersweet face curl to a softer smile, walking to his direction to hold him.
"Hi." You lacked energy to say more than that, allowing his arms to give you an embrace close to a hug while he looks at you fondly, "Are you okay?" keeping his voice low in hopes to calm you.
"Yeah.." You mutter, deciding that to talk might be the best despite your exhaustion.
Stepping closer, you pretty much sink your head on his chest as Fyodor lets you without a word, his hands on your waist like you were a delicacy. "I'm just... annoyed, that's all."
"Annoyed?" He asks, although does not budge further than that. Muffling your voice a bit on his clothing, you continue, "I... I have this burning feeling that none of the pictures I took were good enough, but I feel too tense to try again." feeling a grunt wanting to escape your throat. "I.. tsk, I just..."
"Now, now." Fyodor interrupts you, gliding a hand on your back to comfort you. "Breathe, (Name). I can barely hear your breathing."
"Sorry." Your grunt wins your head, escaping with your apology. However, you follow suit to your boyfriends suggestion as you take his quiet embrace to find the rhythm of your breathing.
When you swiftly swept that off, your hands wrap a little tighter on Fyodor's body as the warmth of his coat hiding your arms gives you a chance to take a deeper exhale. You vent once more, "I still need to take so many more pictures today, most in different places thanks to this list of ideas. It... I just..? Ah, for damns sake— I hate this job sometimes."
"..." Fyodor kept quiet, simply gliding his hand on your back like a light massage as he kept you leaning onto him.
Perhaps he was thinking, perhaps he was surprised. Even so, you were slowly losing your conscious to tension and irritation anyway.
"I see. How about you stop for now and take a break?" He finally spoke out, making you tilt your head just a little to let him know you were listening—although you still kept your head on his chest. "If you don't now, you'd be too tired to take photos properly, right?"
"...Right." You hum out in defeat, a light one, that is. Your boyfriend had a point after all, a break sounded nice right now. "Okay, I'll take a tiny break."
Your agreement makes Fyodor close his eyes, albeit you don't see. "Alright. There's a cafe nearby, at the marketplace we walked by. Would you like to relax there?"
And undoubtedly, you had no reason not to accept.
Coffee and tranquility, light hues of brown and lighthearted topics were all that you two shared as you spent more time in the cafe.
Honestly? There was a part of you that thanked he wasn't talking deep topics with you right now, otherwise you might've exploded... though then again, Fyodor wouldn't be the guy to do that anyway—with you too tired to think, how would he get amusing yet interesting responses?
You were sitting comfortably on your chair as Fyodor was back at the counter to pay for the drinks you two had. Your hands occupied with your camera as you scrolled through photographs of your lover enjoying his food, with his endearing smiles you'd never want to miss.
He can be really cute sometimes, is what you thought to yourself.
"(Name)." Yet your little happy circle gets dashed on by his voice, making you turn you head around.
You knew he saw you looking at his photos, which made your cheeks burn a little. But he does not participate in teasing you with it as he tilts his head, "Shall we go now?" making you nod in reply—quickly closing your camera again to get yourself standing up.
At least you've saved the photos. You can look at it later.
As you two left the cafe to now walk through the marketplace, your eyes easily come across a stall that was undeniably different from the rest. It held the same shape of the stalls surrounding, however it was selling toys rather than any consumable product.
It led you to lightly tug on Fyodor's arm, making him follow your heads direction. "Can we go over there, Fyodor?" You ask him like a kid, making him softly chuckle. "No need to ask it that way. Let us go."
It didn't take long for you to get closer to the displays, eyes faintly sparkling at the sight of the items now in front of you.
Your attention is soon grabbed by a specific teddy bear, small, yet very cute.
It had your usual button eyes, lighter shade for its tummy and round ears. You couldn't help but find it the way its sown a bit eye-catching however, realizing it might be hand-stitched—which lessened your surprise for it's location.
"Is something wrong, milaya?" Fyodor wakes your squinting eyes to. You stop bending over and stand up straight again, smiling as you turn to him. "No. I just found the plush to be cute. It looks hand-made, too."
Taking his silence as a gate to continue, you add, "It's hard to see at first, but the fabric it's made of is actually similar to a normal towel rather than your usual fabrics for teddy bears. The buttons are black, yet they have faint scratches of them.. make's me feel a bit bad, actually." getting a bit distracted from your thought as you look back at the item.
Fyodor couldn't help but smile, eyes watching you stare at the teddy bear like you truly were some kid at an amusement park. "Is that so? How keen of your eyes to have noticed that quick."
But before you can counter a playful reply to that, another party joins you two.
"..E-excuse me." The voice squeaks to, childishly and feminine. "Are you going to buy one...?"
The tiny child comes out of its hiding spot, a girl with short brown hair... and a bit of a fatigued expression.
"Hi there." You speak up first, hiding your camera as you felt it might frighten the little girl. "What's wrong, do you want the teddy?"
"N-no." She shook her head at you, her eyes taking slow turns to you and your boyfriend as you step next to him. "I... made the teddy."
"...Oh?" Fyodor was the first to talk this time, your surprise a copy to his. However he does not let it give any chance to appear rude as he smiles at her, "Do you own this stall?" you following to his friendly approach with your own soft expression.
The child nods as her fingers play with one another nervously, "Yes. Um.. I..." eyes losing contact with Fyodor's while she tries to find her words. You two kept quiet, your own eyes falling back to the teddy just beside you, though you still listened.
"Nobody.. is buying any. I-I'm trying to earn some money... so I can help and save my little brother..."
"..."
So that's the reason.
Immediately couldn't you help but find your fingers meeting the same teddy you've been staring at. "In that case, Fyodor.. I want to buy this." You spoke, stepping a foot forward and showing the item now in your arms.
The corner of your eye sees the girl blink expectantly at your action, Fyodor.. silent for a bit, before he quietly clears his throat.
"Go ahead. I'll pay for it." He responds with the smile he put back on, glancing at you before walking to the little girl. She had stiffened for a second until your boyfriend crouched down, "You'll be the one to save your little brother, I'm sure of it." his expression unreadable to you in this position.
Your eyebrows furrow for some reason, seeing a hint of surprise on the girls face. Why was that? You had no clue. Perhaps it was his expression, but you couldn't see it anyway.
Though soon you see the girl smile, pink hugging her cheeks. It served you finally exhaling that deep breath you didn't realize you were holding back, your own smile escorted suit while you hear a hum from Fyodor and see a tilt of his head.
Their silence was met, but it was a happy one as she looked like she could finally have some hope in her eyes again.
"..." You swore something possessed you as your other hand made work of grabbing your camera, trying to be sneaky with stealing a clip so you wouldn't startle the girl nor get Fyodor back standing up. Not now.
Not while he was making a child smile, him knelt down like he was her father. It all happened so surprisingly and suddenly that you failed to control your instincts to click a moment of it to stay forever.
Perhaps you should also take pictures of the stall too. If it gets recognized, you too can help the girl and her brother. The thought made your heart warmer.
With the teddy bear now in your possession, both of your hands were occupied by the stuffed toy and your arm linked on his as you two kept walking. The day was about to end, and new hues of color were now drowning the sky—yet in an alluring way.
"The sky looks beautiful." You breathe out, colors of purple, pink and orange mixing with each other like a harmony made to be one.
Fyodor doesn't reply, however makes your words known as his gaze also follows the paint of the sky.
It's been a while since you've looked at something like this and felt no burden carp your head. You've been prompted with too many morning scenery, it honestly felt so good to see the opposite for once after a long while.
It makes you pull out your camera, slowly unlinking your arms from Fyodor. Before you knew, the look of endearment and pure joy reappears on your face as your features only accentuate it further—and while you weren't looking, such expression on your face makes the male next to you smile as well.
Click!
How many times have you taken a photo today? You had lost count.
Taken in, your feet lack to tell you the way it walks closer to the railings you two were just in front of; Fyodor initially wanting to inform you, however stops himself and just follows behind.
Click!
You rose your camera a bit higher, trying to find a better angle as the colors keep pattering with one another.
You felt like the photographer you always were—your heart fluttering and beating through rushes of attachment and sentiment, no longer numb like you felt it go a few hours ago at that forest.
"There we go." You hear your lover call out, making you lower your camera down to your abdomen. "See, I believe you push yourself too harsh, milaya... all you need is to let the burdens go once in a while, and recall to the true reason why you're keeping up to what you've been sticking up with till now."
Recall to the true reason why, huh.
..It's a bit embarrassing now, as the seconds pass. Crimson pats your cheeks as you fully turn your body to Fyodor, hands still on your camera while his was on the railing.
Why couldn't he just say all of this earlier? At the coffee shop maybe, or even when you two were still at the forest. You ended up taking too many pictures of the things that you found fondness in, things that you kept smiling to as you snapped the photographs. Albeit they weren't natural scenery, it had as naturally brought you back to your talent, yet without the reminder of your habits.
There was only one thing you could say.
"Fyodor... you planned all of this, didn't you?" You finally ask.
"If I simply spoke with words, I fear they wouldn't be enough... so experiencing it is arguably better. You wouldn't of seen this sunset sooner than how you would at home, would you?"
Fair enough.. though it still makes you laugh. Plan after plan, he never seems to get short circuited on it just to get you happier.
"You really didn't have to.." You try to whisper, feeling a bit bad now. But Fyodor doesn't seem to even feel the same way as you did as he simply closed his eyes with that same smile, "Well, what other ending could I have given you?"
After all, a keen eye needs a keen heart. And sometimes, it just needs a small reminder on why.
#krei promptfics#krei & anon#bsd dostoevsky#bsd imagines#fyodor dostoyevsky bsd#fyodor imagines#bsd fyodor#bsd#bungou stray dogs fyodor#fyodor dostoevsky#bsd x y/n#bsd x gender neutral reader#fyodor x reader#bungo stray dogs fyodor#fyodor bsd#fyodor
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AGATHA ALL ALONG + WANDAVISION MEME SET
Happy Meme Day!!! If you want to take part all you have to do is reblog this post. Remember if you reblog to send them out to EVERYONE who also does. Lasts from today up until the next wednesday (the 13th of november)!
“what were you looking for in my house?”
“the respect of your peers and a fulfilling home life. but you were fresh out of both.”
"you're so much like your mother."
"the world isn’t kind to little girls who don’t know their place."
"we are an unusual couple, you know?"
"this world you made will always be broken."
"this is your only warning. stay out of my home."
"we are not in control here."
"everything is meaningless without you."
"you can fix anything, mama."
"we've said goodbye before. it stands to reason that we will say hello again."
"i only remember feeling completely alone. empty. just… endless nothingness."
"_, welcome home."
"i read somewhere that it’s bad luck to say goodbye in the dark."
"i’m not a monster. i’m a mother."
"i just feel you."
"i just wanted to see you clearly."
"this is chaos magic, _"
"i’m tired of hiding."
"you have no idea what you’ve unleashed."
"you didn’t think you were the only magical girl in town, did you?"
"i can’t control this pain anymore, and i don’t think i want to."
"this is our home now. i want us to fit in."
"so long, darling."
"we’re not going anywhere."
"this is our home, then let’s fight for it."
"you don’t get to make that choice for me."
"you’re not my neighbor, and you’re definitely not my friend."
"you asked me to stay, so i’m staying."
"there are rules in life, we can’t just rush aging."
"is this really happening?"
"you’re not supposed to talk."
"thank you for choosing me to be your _."
"they’ll never know what you sacrificed for them."
"i’m beginning to think we should have stayed in bed."
"i’ve kept you safe in here. you feel at peace."
"if you stay here, you’ll die. it’ll be just like _ all over again."
"we can’t reverse death, no matter how sad it makes us."
"what is grief, if not love persevering?"
"i have what i want, and no one will ever take it from me again."
"you are my sadness, and my hope. but mostly, you’re my love."
"you can’t control me the way you do them."
"gosh, you really are a _. otherwise, none of this would be nearly as dramatic."
"honestly, I don't know how to feel. do I hate her? or do I want her phone number?"
"no one in history has had special treatment like you."
"no! i want more time! i want more time!"
"i'm thinking death by a thousand cuts."
"a long time ago, i loved someone. and I had to do something that I did not wanna do, even though it was my job. and it hurt them. she is my scar."
you can find a couple more options below the cut!
"i mean, seriously. we're an album cover waiting to happen."
"hey, you want straight answers, ask a straight lady."
"see, I feel like you've typecast me as the mouthy teen who didn't actually kill the victim but is guilty of some other b-story crime."
"you haven't been yourself the past few days. almost like you got bit by the true crime bug."
"congratulations, my love. i'm sorry I didn't have a ribbon for you to run through."
"you seem relaxed. usually at this point you're either complaining loudly or freaking out loudly."
"stop embarrassing me in front of my friends."
“witches like you are the reason people think we poison apples, steal , and eat .”
"i watch you, _. just as closely as you watch everyone else.
"are you really defending a noted serial killer, you creepy lurker?"
"i have always hated you. but I left you alone, because what you were doing is important."
"last one there is a nice person."
"i let them believe these things about me because the truth is too awful."
"sweetheart? you okay? oh my god! whoa, what’s she doing? where’s she going?"
"we'll be safe as kittens."
"the moral of the story, kids, IS always finish what you started. also, mercy is overrated.”
“may she be smart. not annoying. and also not… SUPER political.”
"i thought you were reading my palm."
“this is undignified. don’t you want me at my best?”
“are there any real witches in the house? because all i see are has-beens and could’ve-beens.”
"what can i say? i like the bad boys."
“did you know she traded her own child for the book of the damned?”
“they can take your power, _, but they can’t take your knowledge.”
“a witch is really just another name for a bad girl, right?”
“that is extremely reductive.”
"i let them believe these things about me because the truth is too awful."
“we’re alive. we made it through the first test. everyone is safe.”
“not everyone. _’s dead. "who’s _?”
“okay, so, confession. i know an egregious amount about you. i’ve been obsessed since i first read up on your _ days.”
“what a team of rejects. coward. fraud. disappointment. i’d say you should burn like the rest of them, but that would be a waste of kindling.”
“the road promises that what’s missing awaits you at its end. power is what i’m missing. sounds like it’s what you’re missing too.”
“it’s giving ‘middle-aged second chance at love’ vibes, and i’m here for it.”
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You know..sometimes, when meimei and snowcat met, they would get into a gun fights. Lovely saw them and thought that they're getting along well :3 but for demonslihor, he knew they're enemies...
Meimei is always annoyed of his yodelling, too but she get along with him for lovely.
Also kumu is water-proof so he just float on water lol 😂 :333
Anyway here's some scenarios of meimei and lovely (and ofc the two siblings figures, demonlishor and lovely :3)
"this's worse..worse then death!" -Meimei
"mhm..no, mei. i can see it through now, all this times..all this memories timelines you were trying to save me so many times..that you suffered many..." -lovely
"lovely.." -meimei
"you always save me so much...that you don't know who you are. I'm so sorry, i was so stupid.." -lovely
"no.. don't say that...!" -meimei
"but, it's okay now..i am now a god and nothing can kill me anymore...and i will put you in a peaceful world..." -lovely
"but..Where are you going to go! you have no home now! this's where you are going to be ruling! is this what you want, lovely!" -meimei
"if i said the truth..what difference would that be?" -lovely
"even, if you are alone or helpless, don't forget that I'm always here with you, I'm always be on your side.." -lovely
"But, how am i going to know you are with me, if you are going to be like this!" -meimei
"nu uh, it's too soon to be giving up hope! we're magical girls, remember? we make nightmares and raiders go away.. that was our job now...and you are going to be in peace while I'll handle everything..." -lovely
"even though, you can't see me or heard me, I'm still by your side!" -lovely as she took off her green ribbon off her hair and give it to meimei.
"even though we're going to be separated, forever..and not remembering eachother, i do hope that we're going to meet together...i promise I'll remember you forever and ever.." -lovely
"no...are you saying that you are going to erase my memories of you?! how am i going to remember you even though i don't remember you!" -meimei
"i did it because i don't want you to be suffering for me anymore.. I don't want you to cry or feel despair...and l'll handle all the raiders, in the past and the future even when they're even made." -lovely
"even though we're not going to see eachother again..pls promise that you'll take care of kicker, even he's not going to remember me after this. he's a really good boy, really..." -lovely
"no..NO! LOVELY PLS DON'T GO!" -meimei
"I'm sorry..but i have to go take care of others, now! meimei..pls take care of yourself, and pls...i love you dearly as my best friend." -lovely
"LOVELY..!!!!!!!!" -meimei
"why does your friend always pick up a gun fights with snowcat?" -demonlishor
"i really don't know why...but I'm gald they're getting along :D" -lovely
Oh and here's about kumu after he kill his friend, nana after he became a magical boy/girl: he wanted to puke and kill himself, he couldn't believe what he has done. He still goes to the Autobot's base..no one knows where nana went, they thought she went missing. Only, kumu knows.
Oh and here's some angst of starscream and alexis :3 (brother and sister figures) and a little bit tiny of demonlihor x starscream
"arugh...wait, where am i?" -starscream
"starscream!" -???
"Huh? Who's there!" -starscream
"don't you remember, who i am?" -???
"it's me, Alexis! Your friend!" -alexis
"a..a-alexis? What... I don't understand." -starscream
"do you really not remember me?" -alexis
"..i...am not sure if i remember-" -starscream as he suddenly got a bit of his memories back of alexis.
"alexis..." -starscream as he slowly fade away to go back to the reality.
"wait, no! Alexis! ALEXIS!!!" -starscream as he shouted.
"w-what.." -starscream
"what happened!" -starscream
"oh nothing! You just suddenly passed out, heeheh!" -Snowcat
"yeah, we don't know but we thought that you are just tired so we bought you to your berth!" -demonlishor
"hm..thanks you demonlishor..i appreciate it." -starscream smiled a bit as he complimented him and demonlishor got flustered
"hey! Don't forget about me! What about me?" -snowcat yabbing about it
"..." -lovely
"What is she doing here?" -starscream
"oh! She just want to check on you after our last battle of fighting those autobots." -demonlishor
"and I'm confused why is she checking on me if we're enemies, is she even choosing sides or what?" -starscream
"oh! Don't be like that!" -snowcat as he laughed.
Starscream stared at snowcat and then lovely who's watching him behind the wall, honestly, sometimes he is confused why lovely chose to spend times with them even though she's on the good side. But, he started to get suspicious of her after he was waken up.
🔥 MORE ANGST CONTENT 🔥
and awwww, they look like a happy family!
#transformers#maccadam#transformers armada#snowcat transformers#starscream#cyclonus armada#demolisher energon#demolisher armada#lovely#meimei#kumu#transformers energon
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Gazing At Me Starry-Eyed
A soft, slice of life in the Sketcher/Way household, (as opposed to the Smith/Way ;) household) in which Gerard is very, very much in love with his family.
Word Count: 5,818 words. Notes: ~ Title from "The Smallest Man In The World" by Taylor Swift. ~ new Taylor music means a new piece inspired by it somehow - you know the drill by now.
This one took me a little longer than I would've liked, but the brain has been bouncing around a bit recently. Not sure why we went down this path with this lyric but I'm not gonna complain.
~ ohshit she's posting! I have been writing, but not completing things and believe me, that annoys me. I wanna post things, but I don't like doing it unless the whole thing is finished.
~ This is tooth rotting. Actually disgusting (affectionate).
~#~#~#~
[Setting: After the Hesitant Alien tour.]
Gerard leant against the doorframe, watching his wife. She was sitting on the couch, leaning her chin on her hand as she watched their daughter play at her feet. Melody wasn’t paying too much attention to her mother - too absorbed in whatever story she was making up with whatever toys she was playing with. Unlike Gerard, who was focusing more on his wife. She looked… Peaceful, actually, watching their daughter. But also pretty tired. Both tired, and pretty. He’d be considered incredibly biased though, because he always thought that Shelly was pretty. Even now they’d been together… However long it had been. He still thought that she was the prettiest - no. The most gorgeous woman in the entire world. She wouldn’t agree, especially now they were a little bit older and she’d been pregnant twice.
Almost as if on cue, Shelly glanced over to the baby monitor on the side table as the expected baby noises came out of the speaker.
“Sounds like your brother’s awake Mels,” she said, leaning down to run her hand over their daughter’s blonde hair.
“Do you want me to get him?” Gerard asked, pushing himself off of the doorframe and making his way over to his girls.
At the sounds of her father’s voice, Melody looked up and beamed. “Daddy!”
“Mm, no, I’ll go in case he’s hungry,” Shelly pushed herself to her feet, wincing a bit.
“I’ll stay with pumpkin then,” Gerard put his hands on Shelly’s waist and kissed her forehead. “Call for me if you need me.”
“I always need you,” Shelly closed her eyes as her husband kissed her forehead and then her cheek. She smiled at him, “but I know what you mean.”
Gerard hummed before sitting near his daughter, who immediately moved to lean against his legs. Shelly watched this for a moment before going to tend to their baby.
Melody watched her go, her eyes slightly wide. “Mama?”
“Mama’ll be back in a bit, pumpkin,” Gerard soothed her. “She’s just gone to see if Zack’s okay.”
Melody nodded before turning herself to face her father fully. She lifted her arms. “Daddy, up?”
Gerard chuckled and picked up his daughter, settling her on his lap. “There we go.”
“Thank!” She beamed up at him before cuddling against him.
“Welcome sweetheart,” Gerard kissed the top of her head. “Mm, you’re getting big, pumpkin.”
“Big?” The little girl looked up at her dad. “Like mama?”
Gerard hesitated, picking his words. “I mean, you’re not tiny like your brother anymore. You’re not a baby. You’re growing up.”
“To be mama.”
“Like your mama, yeah,” he kissed the top of Melody’s head. ”You’re gonna be like your mama.”
Melody giggled. “Love mama.”
“Yeah we do,” Gerard grinned down at her. “Melody, do you wanna tell daddy what you were playing?”
Melody launched into retelling the story about her Lola doll and the dinosaurs to her father, and Gerard listened to her, nodding every so often at her excited babbling and making little “uh huh, oh really?” noises, which just delighted her even more. When she stopped, running out of steam, Gerard checked the time.
“Hmn, your mama’s been gone for a little while, shall we go and check on her?”
An eager nod from his daughter answered his question and he moved her off of his lap so he could stand. He hesitated for a second before picking Melody up again, earning himself a happy giggle as she clung onto his shirt.
“We gotta be quiet though, okay baby? Just in case Zack’s asleep. Don’t wanna wake him.”
“Okay daddy,” Melody nodded and clung onto her father for security.
Gerard adjusted her and started to leave the room before Melody squeaked.
“Lola!”
“You wanna bring Lola?” He turned and went to retrieve the pink mascot. “We can bring them.”
“Thank!”
Gerard chuckled and they went to go and see what Shelly was up to. He carried his daughter up the stairs but put her down as they approached the nursery, taking her little hand. The door was pushed up, just a little bit so it wasn’t wide open - Gerard knew that Shelly always did that, even if it was just him and Melody home with her; it was just a habit she’d developed back when she had Melody and it apparently had kicked back in with Zack.
He glanced down at his daughter, squeezing her hand to get her attention and putting his finger to his lips when she looked up at him. She nodded, let go of his hand and did the same to her Lola plush doll.
This made Gerard chuckle and he gently stroked her hair. Melody giggled softly and almost clung onto the leg of his pants. Gerard was used to that though, Melody was very much a daddy’s girl. She loved her mama, of course she did, but… It wasn’t a secret that he was wrapped around her tiny, little finger and had been since the day she was born. Hell, since the day he found out that Shelly was pregnant.
With his daughter holding onto him, Gerard gently nudged the nursery room door open so he could see inside a bit better. Shelly was sitting in the rocking chair in the corner - the same one she’d sat in with their daughter. She was rocking slowly, humming to the baby boy in her arms. Her son. Their son!
That woman - she was his incredible wife! Sometimes he still couldn’t believe it. That wonderful, gorgeous woman - she had given him two beautiful children. She’d given him one of each in their first two goes. Not that he would’ve had any issues with giving her as many children as she wanted, as many as she felt like she could handle. He never would’ve minded if she wanted to keep trying to get whatever combination she wanted. And, on the other hand, he never would’ve complained if she had only ever wanted one.
“Ooh, now,” Shelly cooed to their son. “You feeling snuggly, sweetie? Yeah, your dad’s like that too. He gets snuggly after meals.”
Gerard tried not to laugh - she wasn’t wrong. Both in regards to actual meals cooked in the kitchen, and in regards to… Well. His wife was more than just a snack; she was a whole meal herself. And, he did like to snuggle with her afterwards - whether that was on the couch or wrapped up in their sheets.
“You’re such a handsome little man,” Shelly said softly. “You’re going to be just like your daddy.”
Still clinging onto his clothes, practically cuddling his leg, Melody yawned.
“Wanna see mama,” she said sleepily.
Almost as if she’d heard this - despite the fact that Melody has said it so quietly, Shelly glanced up and towards the door. She smiled brightly when she saw her husband and then even more so, if possible, when she saw her daughter.
“Hi love,” Gerard said. “We wanted to check to see if you were okay; you were gone for some time.”
“Zack couldn’t decide if he was hungry or not,” Shelly said, moving to stand up, the baby still cradled against her chest.
“Mama? Cuddles?”
“Alright baby, let mama put Zack to bed.”
Gerard managed to pick his daughter up and took her over to watch Shelly tucking the baby in. Melody clung to him with one hand, her other gripping Lola tightly.
“Nigh’ nigh’,” she said, waving to her brother with the hand that was holding Lola.
Shelly giggled, made sure the baby monitor was still on, and followed the rest of her family out of the room. Gerard took them to Melody’s room, putting the girl on her bed. They’d decided, as parents, that she would be okay with a proper bed, but had made sure that it wasn’t too high up, just in case she did fall out or something.
Melody happily complied in letting her parents get her ready for a nap; she was more than happy to do that. They both tucked her in, Gerard kissed her and stepped back so Shelly could snuggle with her.
“Mama, stay?”
Shelly glanced over to Gerard who nodded.
“Can’t hurt, she asked after you earlier. That’s why we came to find you.”
“Okay baby,” Shelly settled on the bed beside her daughter. “Mama can stay until you fall asleep.”
“Thank you mama.”
Shelly settled a bit more comfortably and Melody snuggled up close to her. Shelly hummed and kissed the top of her head, starting to stroke her hair.
“Babe,” Gerard said softly.
“Mm?” Shelly glanced up.
“I’m just gonna go and tidy up the other toys, and then I’ll be back.”
“Okay,” Shelly smiled at him before glancing down at their now snoozing daughter. “I’ll be right here.”
Gerard laughed softly and went to go and tidy away the toys that Melody had been playing with earlier. While he was at it, he gave the living room a quick, general tidy so Shelly didn’t have to do it. He would’ve done a bit more, just to help out his wife, but he wasn’t totally sure what Shelly had already done and what needed doing.
He made his way back up to his daughter’s bedroom, standing in the doorway to observe for a few moments. Melody was snuggled right up against Shelly, clutching her Lola doll. He wasn’t sure, but he had a feeling that it was one of his merch ones, which were based on something Shelly had made when she was pregnant with Zack - she had just felt extra… Nesty, and that had manifested in her making little felt toys. She’d started with simple shapes, like Peeps, and had moved on from there. Nothing too complicated - he had a feeling that the Lola she’d made was the most complicated thing, but she’d kinda stopped after she made one of those that she was happy with. Then Gerard had taken a shine to it, and had used it as almost a prototype for his merch. And then, Melody had taken a shine to the one Shelly had made, so she made their daughter another one and they’d given her one of the merch ones too.
His daughter was snuggled up happily to his wife, clutching her Lola doll, and it was adorable. Melody already looked so much like her mother - she was blonde, she had blue eyes - Gerard swore that Melody also had a similar face shape to Shelly too. He had the feeling that she would only grow up to be even more like her mom. He sighed a little bit and pinched the bridge of his nose. Gerard wasn’t sure if he was going to be capable of warding the boys off of his daughter. On the other hand, she had several uncles, a feisty aunt and a very protective mama, so she’d be okay.
“Darling?” Shelly called softly from the other side of the room.
Gerard looked up at her and smiled. “Yeah?”
Shelly carefully removed herself from her daughter’s delicate grip, and got to her feet before moving one of Melody’s bigger plush toys to be in the spot she’d been sitting in. She covered Melody up with her favourite blanket before creeping out of the room to be with her husband, pulling the bedroom door up behind her.
“Hi,” she said softly. “You okay?”
Gerard reached for her and pulled her close, nodding. “Yeah, I’m okay.”
“You were just pinching your nose, that’s all,” Shelly leant up on her tiptoes to rub her nose against his. “You only do that when you’re a bit stressed.”
“I was just thinking about how much Mels already looks like you,” he returned the eskimo kiss before kissing her forehead. “And how I’m not sure I’m ever going to be ready to chase the boys -”
“Or girls,” Shelly added, already knowing where this was going.
“True, we don’t judge here.”
She giggled.
“But I was thinking about…” He paused to consider his words. “I really don't think I’m ever going to be ready to chase the dates away from my daughter.”
“Oh, love,” Shelly laughed. “She’s a toddler - she’s nowhere near the double digits yet!”
Gerard hummed but blinked rapidly as Shelly stood on her tiptoes again, but this time she cupped his face.
“You don’t need to worry Gee,” she said softly. “You especially don’t need to worry yet.”
He wrapped his arms around her waist, and held her close. “I know, I know. I can’t help it.”
“You’ll worry yourself into an early grave, love,” she kissed his cheek before standing back onto her feet. “You start worrying about that now, and you won’t be around when she hits that point.”
“I know. I know,” Gerard tightened his grip on her and buried his face in her neck for a moment, inhaling her scent. “I’ll try to stop thinking about the future and concentrate on the here and now.”
“Mm hm. That’s a good idea,” Shelly stroked his hair. “Enjoy her while she’s little, ‘cause she won’t be little for long.”
“Oh, god, yeah, I know, I can’t believe she’s not a baby anymore.”
“Well, she’ll always be our baby.”
Gerard hummed and kissed Shelly’s forehead. “Mm, true. But, she really is growing up so fast.”
“Zack will too,” Shelly said with a nod before she covered her mouth as she yawned. “Mm, I think we should go and sit down…”
“Oh. Yeah, of course,” he kept an arm around her waist. “Did you want a nap while the kids do?”
Shelly hummed. “I think that might be a good idea.”
“You’re still breastfeeding after all, and you need to be rested and healthy to produce that,” Gerard steered her to their bedroom so she could lay down and nap.
“He doesn’t seem interested in regular baby food yet,” Shelly said, allowing her husband to usher her to their bed, where she settled on top of the duvet. “I keep trying.”
“I know,” Gerard covered her with a blanket. “And he’ll take it when he’s interested. It’s okay if he only wants mama right now.”
“Mm, I hope so. Melody was much more curious,” Shelly snuggled down more. “But then again, she had daddy asking her to try new foods, and we know she’s a daddy’s girl.”
“And Zack,” Gerard tucked her in properly. “Is very much currently a mama’s boy.”
“That’s just because I feed him,” Shelly sounded mildly amused. “He’s a mama’s boy because mama has the soft, snuggly boobs with the tasty milk.”
Gerard tried not to laugh, grinning at his wife instead. “Well, to be fair…”
Shelly raised an eyebrow at him.
“I normally only want mama, so I can’t say I blame him.”
She giggled and he leant down to kiss her. He soon felt her grab ahold of his shirt to keep him close. He got the message quite quickly, actually, which was good, even though he really enjoyed her next action - which was to let go of his shirt to grab the back of his neck. Sometimes she’d tangle her fingers in his hair and hold him to her that way, and he really enjoyed that. (That was one of the elements that got them their daughter after all. Alongside other things, of course. It had never really been a secret that he was weak to having his hair played with, pulled a little even. At least, it had never been a secret to Shelly. She’d picked up on that fact embarrassingly quickly - and before they’d gotten together too.)
“Stay with me?” She asked, softly and shyly.
Gerard blinked rapidly at her. “Love, why do you look so nervous?”
Shelly sunk under the blanket a little more, pulling it up over her nose. Naturally, when she spoke, her voice was quieter and a little muffled. “In case you say no.”
“N- no?!” Gerard spluttered. “Darling, when have I ever told you no? Especially in regards to something as innocent as that.”
She hummed and nodded a little. Gerard watched this before gently moving the blanket so he could see her face better - she had a light blush on her cheeks.
“Oh love,” Gerard moved to settle on the bed behind her, getting right up close under the blanket to spoon her, wrapping his arms around her tightly. “I could never say no to snuggling and cuddling with you. Why would I ever deny you that?”
Shelly wriggled back against him, into his hug, settling happily. She hummed - it was almost like a purr actually - when he squeezed her gently.
“I don’t know,” her voice was just above a whisper. “I guess I’m feeling a little… Unsure, at the moment.”
“Hmm,” he kissed the back of her neck - although it was closer to the side because it was nearer to where her neck met her shoulder. “I think that you and I need to have a conversation when the kids have gone to bed properly later, but for now, darling, you need to nap.”
“Gee…” Her voice was almost a whimper.
“A good conversation, love,” he kissed her neck again, holding her tightly. “It’ll be okay, I’m not gonna leave you over anything. I love you.”
He felt her relax in his arms at those words - even if it was only a little, and that was something, at least.
“I love you too,” she whispered.
“Go to sleep, pretty mama,” he murmured. “I’ll stay right here with you.”
Shelly giggled sleepily and relaxed back against him and into the blanket. Gerard hummed, buried his nose in her hair and snuggled with her. She fell asleep first, which he expected because, even though he was now home to help her with the house and to support her with the kids, she was still the more active one with it all - she still had the routines down and still took charge with it all. The kids still wanted her first, even though Melody really was a daddy’s girl, she still wanted her mom first. And because the kids wanted mom first, she was often the one to get up at night to tend to Melody. And she had to be up to tend to Zack in case he was hungry, and even if he wasn’t hungry, the scent of his mom and being snuggly with her normally helped. But that was a baby thing - Melody had been the same. (And honestly? Sometimes all Gerard wanted was to snuggle against his wife and smell that lovely combination of her natural scent and her perfume. He got it.)
He completely understood the rest though - he had travelled a lot and hadn’t been around for… Well, not for ages, it really was only for a little bit, right at the beginning of the children’s lives. Maybe because it had been for such a short time, they could exclude it later on down the line. He honestly didn’t see himself travelling again for a little while, but weird things happened so neither of them were ruling it out - he just hoped it wouldn’t be for Quite Some Time now. He wanted to be around for his wife and his kids, and for the milestones.
It made so much sense to him that she was so tired. He was doing his best to try and take over doing the things he could - like the house stuff. It was sort of working, Shelly was getting better at stepping back and letting him take over. Again, at least with the stuff around the house. He was happy to let her take control with the kids - he’d just follow her lead there. He could take over things like, giving Melody a bath while Shelly dealt with the baby, for example. He did his best, and he knew she appreciated it.
Shelly fell asleep first, and therefore, she woke up first. She was honestly a little surprised to feel her husband still beside her - still spooning her, still with his arm around her. She enjoyed it, actually. He was probably feeling a little protective, and determined to make sure that she felt loved.
Not that she’d ever felt unloved, not for a moment in their entire relationship. She’d doubted herself during ProRev, of course she had. Gerard had been on top of the world, in some of the best shape of his life (at that point), at the height of his career (at that point) and she… Was just herself. Just someone who worked for the band, who (according to some) kept her job because of… Less than professional reasons. Even though she knew that they would’ve kept her even if she and Gerard weren’t together. She had been a bit vulnerable during ProRev, admittedly, and that had apparently been a little obvious. Much like when she practically admitted to being self conscious before they fell asleep. She didn’t doubt that he’d remember that, and she most certainly didn’t doubt the fact he’d remember and they really would end up having that discussion later on.
Shelly managed to remove herself from her husband’s hold before a few little noises came from the speaker of the baby monitor on her bedside table. She hummed, tidied her hair a little and made her way to the nursery.
Gerard woke up a little while later - not too long had passed, but enough for him to move in his sleep to pull her closer, only to find an empty spot where his wife had been. He sat up and rubbed his eyes for a moment before checking the time. They hadn’t napped for too long, so that was good - certainly not long enough for Melody to wake up first and come and find them. His first instinct was to go and see if his wife had gone to check on their daughter, but then the baby monitor crackled a little bit. He tilted his head and waited to see what would come out of the speaker next, partially poised in case he needed to head in there.
Out of the sounds he expected to hear from the baby monitor, his wife singing quietly to their son wasn’t one of them.
It had been a while since he’d heard that - she used to sing to their daughter when Melody was a baby, and he guessed that she still did quite frequently, just like she sung to their son; he just didn’t catch her doing it very often, if at all. She was quite shy about it apparently and would clam up quickly if she had even an inkling that someone else might be listening.
“I don’t know darling,” her gentle voice came from the speaker. “Daddy’s the singer, Daddy’s the talented one. Not me, no, not mama.”
Gerard sat in silence, staring at the little device, unable to quite believe the words that he’d just heard. After a few minutes, Shelly started humming again. It didn’t take him long to recognise the song as one of the ones they’d danced to at their wedding. It wasn’t their first dance song, but he definitely remembered slow dancing with her to it, while she was wearing white.
He listened to her for a little longer before pushing himself off of their bed and heading to the nursery, approaching the door carefully. She’d left it mostly open for once, so he guessed that Zack hadn’t needed another feed or anything - just a little attention, and honestly, that was fair. He stopped and glanced towards Melody’s bedroom before creeping over to press his ear against the door, listening for a moment - it didn’t sound like she was awake from her nap yet. Or if she had, she was playing quietly until they came to get her. He’d do that in a minute.
Shelly continued humming softly to her son, cradling him against her chest as she slowly made her way around the room.
“I might not be talented, like your father,” she said softly to the baby. “But I do make well behaved children, so I’ve got that going for me.”
Zack peered up at the sound of his mother’s voice, otherwise snuggled happily against her and Shelly smiled down at him.
“Yeah. You’re going to grow up to be a lot like your dad I think,” she said quietly with a smile. “Oh, if you grow up to be a carbon copy of your father, I’m going to have to chase the girls away, aren’t I?”
Zack patted at his mother, mostly getting her chest.
“Oh… Excuse me, chase the dates away from you,” Shelly leant down to nuzzle and kiss the top of his head. “Boys, girls, both, neither. As long as you’re happy, healthy and safe, darling. We’re not gonna judge you, honey. Mama definitely can’t do that.”
The baby gurgled happily and Shelly beamed.
“Yeah, okay. I get what Gerard was saying about Melody earlier. But we’ll be good, I promise. Dates have to get through your uncles and your Auntie Lux first, and I do not envy them for that. Then they get to meet the parents, and I think your dad might be a bit more… Intense than I am. Especially when it comes to your sister.”
She fell quiet for a few moments, gently swaying with her son.
“I just hope I don’t turn into one of those crazy ‘boy moms.’ I don’t want to be a future nightmare of a mother in law. Or just ‘Zack’s weird mother’ as you grow up,” Shelly stopped for a moment to move her son so he was looking over her shoulder, starting to rub his back gently.
A few minutes of this passed as Shelly slowly walked around the room again; her movements were almost like she was dancing with her baby. It wasn’t until she was facing the window with Zack still looking over her shoulder behind her, that she stopped because her son squealed softly with delight.
“Hmn?” She adjusted him so she could look at his face. “What’s that for?”
Zack gurgled at her again, settling back into her arms. Shelly smiled warmly down at him before turning around, fully intent on going to sit in the rocking chair with him; maybe see if he was hungry.
Instead, she caught sight of her husband leaning one shoulder against the nursery door frame, his hands in the pockets of his jeans. Just casually watching her with that little smile on his face and sparkling stars in his eyes.
He looked so good and it just wasn’t fair. He was still just as handsome as the day Shelly had met him. Hell, maybe she was biased, but she thought that he was even more handsome now with some years on him. Even though he certainly didn’t look his age, and that was even more unfair. Especially because Shelly was starting to feel hers. Maybe it was because she’d had two children - her son wasn’t even a year old yet, maybe it was just a woman thing due to the pressure of society or whatever or maybe she was just feeling sensitive and tired. But she definitely didn’t feel like she looked as good for her age as he did.
“There she is,” he said, moving himself off of the door frame, pushing up the sleeves of his sweatshirt as he made his way over to her.
Shelly swallowed. God damn it, why was that so hot? Why was that still so hot? Jesus Christ. She’d pretty much only just had Zack, she did not need another one.
“H- hi,” she managed, glancing up at him as he stopped in front of her. Just for a second before she looked back at the baby in her arms.
Gerard hummed at her, but stayed watching her for a moment, until she smiled at their son. He moved a little closer and rested one hand on her waist, his hand soon slipping to her hip, where it stayed. She raised an eyebrow but didn’t take her eyes off of their baby. So, Gerard gently squeezed her hip before using his other hand to gently lift her chin.
“Hi gorgeous,” he said softly. “My beautiful, stunning, wonderful wife.”
She went from blinking rapidly at the chin lifting to shaking her head slightly at his words. “Mm, no.”
“Mm yes,” he ran his hand over her hair, gently tucking some loose strands behind her ear. “You are the most beautiful woman in the world, and you get prettier every single day, more gorgeous every single year, more wonderful for every single milestone we hit.”
“Not that you’re biased or anything,” Shelly mumbled.
“Of course not,” Gerard gently took Zack from her, hoisting him up to lean him against his shoulder. “C’mere my boy, time to give mama a break.”
“But -” Shelly pouted a little bit. “But mama doesn’t mind having cuddles with her babies.”
Gerard hummed at her while making sure he could support his son with one arm. Once he was sure that the baby was secure, he leant his cheek against his son’s head and reached for his wife with his free hand, managing to grab her hip and pull her to him that way, sliding his arm around her waist once he felt her lean against his chest a little.
“I know mama doesn’t mind,” he said softly, kissing the top of her head, smiling when that made her nestle against his chest. “But mama is tired, and Zack’s clearly not hungry right now, so maybe you should go and rest quietly for a bit.”
She sighed and stepped back from him, trying to reach for her son. “But, Gerard -”
“Shelly,” he let her move away, but lifted her chin again, his hand slipping to cup her cheek. This action made her eyes widen at first but she otherwise almost melted against him. “Listen to me.”
“Mm hm…” She nodded and his hand returned to her waist.
“You; the love of my life, the sun to my moon, the paint to my miniatures, the coffee to my mug -”
She giggled, going slightly pink.
“The mother of my two beautiful children,” he continued, squeezing her gently. “My gorgeous, wonderful, insanely attractive - no don’t you shake your head at me.”
Shelly squeaked and buried her face in his chest. Gerard hummed and kissed the top of her head again.
“You don’t need to feed the tiny one currently,” he repeated gently. “And, like I said earlier, you need to be well rested, and well to properly produce, so, while the tiny lion doesn’t need sustenance, go and rest, mama.”
“But Melody -”
“Will be fine hanging out with just daddy for a little bit,” he lifted her chin again. “I can solo parent my own children for a little bit, love.”
“You didn’t call it babysitting,” she smiled.
“Of course not,” Gerard shook his head with a small snort before turning his head to kiss his son. “These are my children, Shell, I helped make them.”
“Yeah,” Shelly giggled. “You did.”
He grinned at her before kissing her forehead. “Nothing worse than those fathers who consider parenting and babysitting on the same level that way.”
“Mm,” she hummed happily as he kissed her forehead and then leant up on her tiptoes to nuzzle her son. “I mean, it takes two to make a baby after all.”
“Yeah, and we men get the fun part,” he wrapped his arm around her to hold her close. “You mamas get the hard, painful, incredibly difficult part. And I’m so surprised that you wanted to go through that twice, for and with me.”
Shelly opened her mouth to talk but couldn’t find the words so shook her head and reached for her baby again. This time, Gerard gave in and passed Zack over, watching Shelly soothe the wriggly child until he was cradled against her shoulder. He paused for a moment before holding her tighter, making sure not to squash the baby as well, of course.
“I think you’re amazing,” he murmured into her hair, smiling as Zack giggled. “For choosing me, for loving me long enough to want to marry me -”
“Oh love, I could say the same thing.”
“For wanting to put up with me for the rest of our lives,” Gerard continued. “For going through the whole pregnancy thing, not only once, but twice, Shell. You’re incredible for that alone.”
“Oh, stop,” Shelly shook her head a little.
“Even if my body was capable, I don’t think I could do it - I don’t think I could cope. But you made it look so easy, both times!”
“Well, the first time, I had a very, very good village,” Shelly smiled slightly. “I had some very protective bodyguards.”
Gerard laughed.
“But that’s what you do for those you love,” she said quietly. “You give them the world.”
“Shelly,” Gerard took her hand, kissing the back of it. “You are my world, you always have been. My sun, my whole damn galaxy. I would’ve been happy with just you, honestly, but,” he rubbed his thumb over her wedding ring, keeping a hold of her hand and using his free one to gently tickle under Zack’s chin. “But no, you decided that we should expand our universe and add a couple more stars to our skies.”
Zack laughed at his father - more at the tickling than anything else. He couldn't quite understand all the words yet, but he was safe, snuggled against his mama, and happy with attention from his dad.
“And my god, I’m so glad. So, glad that I’m the one accompanying you on this particular journey, because it’s wonderful to see you add another feather to your well decorated cap,” Gerard pulled her close again and wrapped his arms around her. “I’m amazed by you and I’m convinced that there’s nothing you can’t do.”
“Not that you’re biased at all, Gerard,” Shelly hummed. “Not everyone would agree with that.”
“Of course they wouldn’t,” he said before he grinned at her. “But it sucks to be them, as I have the best wife in the cosmos, and I’m never letting her go. I don’t like to share.”
Shelly giggled, a blush on her face as she leant up to kiss his cheek. “Alright Romeo. You’ve already won me, you don’t need to try so hard. Let’s go and wake Melody up -”
“But you’re supposed to be resting!”
“And I’ll relax more surrounded by my babies and my husband, not alone in our room,” she tilted her head at him. “Okay? I’ll let you wait on me hand and foot and take the lead, but I don’t want to be alone.”
Gerard’s expression softened. “Okay. That’s fair. I’ll take that.” “Good. Compromising is fun, see?” She grinned at him.
“Alright,” he kissed her forehead again. “Okay, let’s go and wake up the other baby.”
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OKAY SO
You technically know me 😼
But imma give you smth to work with :3
So i want a normal, human matchup??
I'm female, (can i say i'm bi i dunno??) 170 in height, kinda chunky but a lil muscly??
I have a permanent resting b face, short fuse, death stare EVERYBODY 😈
I'm nice to people that deserve it?? Like, if a stranger comes up to me and asks something or i ask someone for something i'm an angel but if somebody i know and don't like talks to me, i'm a bitch
I'm overall a bitch, but also a lil shy??
I like drawing, singing from time to time, i ADORE KITTIES AND WILL DO EVERYTHING FOR THEM.
With people i befriend i unlock my NAUGHTY ASS HUMOUR and overall cracked sense of humour.
(Just in case, we both know how i simp for Sanemi but you don't have to match me with him if that doesn't match me - yeah me big ass brain)
IF THIS REQUEST IS TOO CRACKED THEN TELL ME I WILL REWRITE IT???
or give up in shame
LOVE YAH BABE 😻🤯🥳
I match you with Sanemi Shinazugawa!
You and Sanemi both have resting bitch faces and may look unapproachable. In your case, it can be a defensive mechanism but in the Wind Hashira's case, he is a bastard who has no respect for anyone.
In the beginning, the two of you probably butt heads every single moment you two meet, infuriating and annoying each other so freaking much...! But you both secretly love how you can get under each other's skins. Not that either one of you will say it out loud!
Sanemi certainly does not deserve your kindness and he doesn't expect any from you.
It takes time and tons of hard work from you to earn his respect and even when you have it, he doesn't show it. He is as stubborn as a mule.
You aren't afraid of hard work and he admires that trait in you. He does not rely on luck and firmly believes that actions speak louder than words.
He secretly thinks you are cute, but you will never hear him say it out loud on purpose.
Instead, this bastard tells you how you have no place amongst the Demon Slayers and just like with his younger brother Genya, he tries to get you to quit also, but only because he is certain that is the only way he can keep you safe.
He has seen you acting all happy and buddy-buddy with other Hashiras and he knows it's none of his business who you spend time with, but it annoys him to see you smile so sweetly to someone you don't even know that well.
It takes time, so much time and work until he doesn't call you a bitch and instead uses your real name. When he does this, you can immediately tell something is different, and that he has changed his view of you.
You may be tempted to be an ass and tease him, but you know that Sanemi wouldn't say or do something if he didn't mean it. Maybe the two of you could get along? You are both willing to try, even if a little reluctant.
Old habits die hard so he may call you bitch now and then, but it's more affectionative than insulting. In the same way, you may call him a bastard, but there isn't the usual aggressive bite in your words. No, it's much sweeter now.
Sanemi starts to hang around you, but not necessarily in the same room as you. He might be secretly listening to you sing but if you catch him listening, he gets defensive and may unintentionally say something like, "I just came to check who was killing the cat here!"
It doesn't help that you usually have a stray cat or two following you around. You're like a damn cat magnet and they like you almost as much as you adore them.
Sanemi doesn't mind cats, but they seem to love him also for some reason. It's like he chases humans away but attracts cats?
It might take a close situation where you are almost killed before Sanemi comes clear and tells you that he likes you out loud. The fear of losing you would shed away all his protective walls and show the tender love he has inside.
After that, he would start dreaming of a peaceful life with you in a world where Demons don't exist anymore. Maybe have a kid or two if you want any or travel a little? Whatever it is, he wants to do it with you by his side until the day you both enter the next life.
I know you, my dear friend and I know how you love Sanemi, so I kept it a secret, but I totally think Sanemi is your match!
#demon slayer#demon slayer matchup#kimetsu no yaiba#kny#sanemi shinazugawa#1julak1#matchup#Surprise!#I hope you enjoy your match Friend!#ENJOY!
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My forever lasted for only a month! Guess what?! I'm back!!
I've finally realized that I should not punish myself for some... anyway, I will not hold any grudge against anyone anymore. I have so many lovely friends here on Tumblr and I've been missing them a lot. I mean, they didn't do anything wrong to me, why would I cut off communication with them as well?
It's okay not to be liked by everyone. But there's a thing I want to mention that I still like, respect, and humbly apologize to them who I made feel bothered or annoyed with. I'm extremely sorry, I didn't mean to tick anyone off consciously, honestly.
But, here I am, to bother y'all again!
And it was a very wholesome break indeed, I enjoyed doing other things a lot during this time. I've drawn a lot, I edited a lot, I wrote a little one-shot Tangled fanfic just yesterday... and I want to show them to you all!
I'll post everything here eventually.
I'm going to conclude this post for now with a "Eid Mubarak" greeting— EID MUBARAK! May all your sorrows be wiped out, may all you be rejuvenated with new hopes, may this be the end of all wars, may peace be showering all over the world. Thanks!
#pixiesdiary#jasmine#aladdin#digital art#art#ibispaint x#my art#fan art#disney princess#eid mubarak#eid
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Sunday confessions
Some Tomdaya blogs are in clique and they tend to over analyze everything, like right now they are over analyzing Tom being raised to be a gentleman and open doors for Zendaya and it's kind of endless.
Also people analyzing the hand color in Claire's Instagram video is a bit much.
I just get annoyed 😞.
like right now they are over analyzing Tom being raised to be a gentleman and open doors for Zendaya and it's kind of endless.
Wait...what?? Why are they analyzing that?? 😅 It's TRUE! Tom was raised to be a gentleman. 😊
Also people analyzing the hand color in Claire's Instagram video is a bit much.
OKay, I'll admit, some of us were just curious in here as well... But I don't think we harped on it lol. Like I said before, I don't obsessively worry about where TZ are every second of the day like I used to. Those days are over for me lol, and quite frankly, I do feel like it can be a bit much as well sometimes. #ConfessionSunday
I personally think they're JUST FINE, but I think maybe either some newbie shippers or those who still have PTSD syndrome from the Tomdaya 1.0 Split of 2019 seem to be the ones who are very avid in knowing where they are at all times. 😅 For me though, I just personally don't think it's that serious? 😅
I've already made peace with the fact that IF (God-forbid) Tomdaya were to ever split up again, while it would be super sad and gut-wrenching, I know that in the end, they would be okay, and they would have made the healthiest decision for THEM. The world will still turn, and the sun will still rise lol. So, I'm no longer anxious about the status of their relationship anymore because I think they're just fine, and even if they were to split up, I know it's not going to kill me. Plus, my life is already so busy in itself now days that I just don't have the time to worry about where someone is that I don't even know personally. I just see pics/stuff come out and I am happy to get content! 🥰
It's much simpler that way for me personally. 😊
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Brighten My World - Tasneem x fem reader (Chapter 8)
Chapter 1
Previous Chapter
warnings: angst, mentions of eating disorder
word count: 906
---------------
She did not talk to me for the rest of the school day. Only sent me an apologetic look when I initiated a conversation. But she also did not resist when I got into the car with her to accompany her home.
She did pull her hand away when I touched it though.
I did not know what to do. Her words were still buzzing in my mind, burning their way through my whole body.
I was pretty sure that she had not meant any of it. That she had just tried to hurt me to make me leave her. Yet she had been successful. It did hurt, still was.
I only dared to raise my voice again when we had arrived inside her room.
“Tasneem … can we talk? Please”, I requested.
She shook her head, pacing around her room to avoid me as much as possible.
I was torn between respecting her wish and forcing her to talk to me anyway. What was the right answer?
“Okay”, I whispered and sat down next to her bed, hugging my knees.
It felt like I was invading her space. But I could not get myself to leave if she did not ask me to.
I could not help but wonder if she had meant her words to some extend. After all I had kinda forced myself into her life the day I had confronted her with her eating disorder. Had I overstepped the line back then? Maybe I had only wanted to believe that I was good for her. Considering that she was barely hanging out with her friends anymore I might as well be a bad influence.
What was I even doing?
I had to go. My own emotions were overwhelming me more by the second. One wrong step and I would break down as well. I could not support Tasneem like that.
But my body just did not move.
So instead of running away, I hid my face on my knees.
My tears were silent. You had to learn that skill when your mom was talking you down for getting emotional.
Luckily Tasneem was too busy with her own turmoil to notice my state.
After a while her pacing stopped, filling the room with silence.
“I want to binge so badly right now”, Tasneem confessed, making me lift my head to look at her.
“I'm sorry”, she uttered, her voice beginning to crack. “I know I hurt you. I … I didn't mean to. Well I did, but not really. I … ugh! I'm just a total mess.”
She winced when she spotted my tears.
I did not know what to say. She was right. How was I supposed to react?
Tasneem took that question from me by continuing: “I hate myself. I … You shouldn't have to put up with me. It feels like I'm just using you.”
“Why do you love me?”, I wondered.
She was taken off guard by my question.
“Sorry, I … I shouldn't have asked you in such a situation. You're way too upset to think about it right now”, I retreated quickly, fearing her answer or rather the lack of it.
“Of course I love how kind and considerate you are, although I just talked that down. I … I love how you're always there for me, how you manage to make me smile even on the bad days. I love that you're making me a better person in a way that I don't lose myself still. But that's all way too general”, she stated.
Her pacing had stopped as she was standing in front of me, still some distance between us though.
“I love how you always manage to trip over our carpet despite being here basically all the time. I love how you are walking around while brushing your teeth. And how you just start singing without even noticing. Honestly it's insane that some of your quirks make me smile instead of annoyed”, she confessed.
Now I could not decide between feeling upset and overjoyed. Great …
“I love you, too, Tasneem”, I assured her. “And I want you to be able to come to me anytime, but you have to talk to your therapist about all of this. Please.”
“I will”, she promised. “I don't want my life to go back to the way it was before. Before you were in it.”
“Me neither”, I agreed.
As soon as I attempted to get up she was holding her hands out to me. A peace offering.
I let her pull me up and onto the bed with her. She was not restless anymore, but back to holding me in her arms.
“Do you remember when you realized that I wasn't alright either? That I was just great at masking it?”, I wondered.
“Yeah, of course”, she claimed.
“You make my world brighter as well. This relationship isn't a one-way street. You've helped me so much to deal with Layan's death. Without you I would have drowned in my sorrow. Please, don't ever forget that”, I remarked.
Despite such dark moments between us thanks to all our old and more recent wounds, that was simply a fact. We were simply better together. And I was hoping as much as I could that it would stay that way even in the distant future.
The End
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It's kinda ironic to finish this story after eight chapters. After all it wasn't even meant to become a series. It was a Oneshot I just couldn't let go. Now I do have to let go. I hope you all loved this story just as much as I enjoyed writing it.
Tag List: @sunwoniie
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The Ups and Downs of a Close Relation with Deities: Why I choose to love, to Aphrodite and Loki?!...
Short answer?! Well, I didn't: They choose me, and after many months of know them... I accepted them. Period.
If you hasn't read yet, my story with Aphrodite; in ''An Special Note for Aphrodite'', and; my story with Loki, in ''An Special Note for Loki ''; is a tiny part of my relation with both which they seems to be totally okay with that, but... Is a relation with both things: The good with the bad. (And... With a dash of weirdness, trowed in the middle) I will say in more detail, about the happy moments (and sometimes... The not so happy, too!); plus how I react when people talked about them, and; about all... How serious are this kind of relation, in case you are thinking in taking the next big step.
At first, was Aphrodite's Love; and a year later... Loki's Love, which entered into my life: After four years, when I realized than I liked both; I had two weeks of total denial, but I finally gave up, when I realized than what I felt for Aphrodite and Loki; wouldn't dissapear from one day to the other, even if I tried. I started to live this strange and lovely relation, where both of them sitted at each side of me; or they just picked in what time one will be close to me, and the other leaves; and even... Suddenly feeling one of them, hugging me at night. (Sometimes, I had wake up; feeling being hugged by both)
But... For ten years, than felts like forever (Not, in the good way); they started to arguing with me. It wasn't all the days, but when it happened... It was REALLY UGLY, people: At the end of the discussion with Aphrodite, with Loki... And, sometimes were the both of them verbally lashing against me; and me verbally doing the same to both of them, until we were the three so angry; than at the end of the vision, (mostly in a neutral place in The Spiritual World, than I shared with them) than we just slammed the three white doors than communicate with the common living room; and not talking to each other …For weeks without end.
In other moments, of those ten years... I saw their other faces, too: ''The World-Breaker'', with Loki; and... ''The Black One/The Dark One'', with Aphrodite. (Both... Are incredible scary to look at!) After they transformed themselves during those fights, with these terrifying appareances; they leaved me alone, and I ended crying for what I saw; but... I cried even more, for the uncertainty than if I will back to saw them again; and if they ever back, than if we could be together in peace; like in the first time I met them.
...Ten years later, one day... I opened the door, to the common place in The Spiritual World; and both of them, were standing a meter from the door and dressed in the same clothes of the first time I met them; (except, than the clothes of both; were totally white) with a loving energy and smiling to me tenderly, they extended their arms to me at the same time; and I just ran towards both of them, hugging them with all my strength; and I innundated my nose with the sweet fragances than were now so familiar to me, and I realized in that moment; than those hard times... Were finally over! (I'm not saying than we don't fight and argue anymore, but they almost never has showed me that side of them, since then... Thanks to The Gods and Goddesses, for that!)
I find out, during those years of ''Union and Disunion...'' Than there were more pagans in The World, and I made official my entering to Paganism (when I always believed in other Deities in The World, even when I was an small child); I found out than they were more couples of Aphrodite and Loki... I should have feel jealous, but; for the first time in my life; I didn't care about it: I even felt happy, than more people could have the same thing; than I have with them!
When people speaked ill of the Gods and/or Goddesses, I felt annoyed and sometimes I politely told them to don't do that; but... When someone said something bad about Aphrodite, or Loki; then... I just wanted to makes them pay! (Aphrodite and Loki, had to talks me than ''you better leaves them alone... They doesn't even worth it!...'' so I don't went to gave to those idiots, what they really deserve!)
And when someone says something hurtful about any of them, I feel bad; but, when someone says something hurtful about Aphrodite and Loki; and I see to Aphrodite or Loki, sad... I feel hurt too, and I have to put a brave face and speak to them so they doesn't feel bad; when I only wanted to cry... (...And I wishes to told to whoever said that, what I really think of them... [Of course: After punched them in the face, first!...])
Now... How serious is my relation with the both of them: Extremelly serious. But, is not only about the feelings; but is too about how this kind of interactions, will affect your life; is what you should take in account, before to accept.
A few years ago, Loki showed up suddenly; and asked me to marry him... I was extremelly happy, until I realized than he proposed me... At the start of The Pandemic, and after I took a moment to think than; if I married him in that moment, (with not efective vaccines, or even reliable treatments at the horizon; with the fear than my parents could die, and locking myself to avoid that; while The World seemed to being dying) than after I wait for years than he finally says me that, to told me in that time; where he may have in a few months will passed to be my spouse, and shortly in that time, he could be turns into a widower... I think than it wasn't funny at all, and I reacted immediately: I slapped him, and I spended three months not talking to him; to the point that I blocked him from me, and he had to uses my Phone's Music Player; as the only way to talk to me in that time. Two days later, it was Aphrodite's turn to proposed me; but I told her than with the world dying outside, ''I don't feel like I can be happy to get married, right now; and... I need to prepare myself to feel confident enough, so you can be proud of me!'' She was sad, but she understood than I don't felt good enough for join my heart to her, just yet.
When happened the event of the leaving of one of my favorite bloggers, I refused to talk or being near to Loki for two months; which was one of the longer times we have being apart; recently... Very slowly, things are starting to get better; but I'm still dealing with my closeness and trust issues again, since that event.
As I have said before, in one of my posts... Aphrodite, is really strong; and Loki, is extremelly good with magic and spells: Both of them, are the most beautiful and desirable Deities; in their respective pantheons, but... There's something most new pagans ignore, about Aphrodite's and Loki's nature...
...Both, are of the most dangerous Deities of all The Pantheons of Deities...
Loki and Aphrodite's, doesn't take kindly to blasphemy; and offending to Aphrodite for her past, or to Loki for his sex orientation/giving birth/doing or saying bad things to his followers/speaking ill of his most famous children... And they will makes you desire to don't say such things never again, for the rest of your life. (Don't confused yourself thinking than, because Loki likes pranks; parties, to do childlike things and flirts; and, than because Aphrodite likes beautiful and feminine things; and is smiling almost all the time... Than is a good idea to elicite their anger: My sister already payed the price for offending to Aphrodite; with an unhappy marriage with a bad man and an ugly divorce, [ read my post about it, called; Why we must treat to Deities in general, with respect? (...Or how talking about them in bad terms, could land you into a deep trouble!)] and... Another relative of mine, tripped over and hitted himself in the leg; 'cause he said a comment than was enough to makes to Loki used his power, 'cause he doesn't like than people bother or mistreat to any of his followers.)
Okay, you may think: If they are so dangerous, then... WHY IN THE UNIVERSE, YOU ARE STILL WITH THEM?!... Well... You don't choose to whom to love, and except for those huge and ugly fights we had in the past; they treates me even better than most people I have met, in all my life. (Relatives, included) Or... Love, have mades me stupid; or... After all the problems I had in my life, maybe my self-preservation instinct must be totally broken, I don't know. Another point, to consider: You will grow old someday, or became ill enough to start to depend of others most of the time; and relations with Deities, has a caducity date in most of the times; and while many can still have them as boyfriend/girlfriend/fiancee/lover/spouse, forever... They are many more which their relation ended for old age/illness, or... Time, which wears out everything; even strong feelings like Love. But, the biggest danger with a romantic/emotional relation with Deities; is this: Than you could came to believe than is the only good thing in your life, and if it ever ended; you will think than you don't have none else in the face of the earth... Is not true: Enjoy that relation now, but don't spend 24/7 only doing things in that relation; and go out with friends and makes new projects; so in case your relation with Deities ended... You still have someone than you can talk about it, do things than interest you and than makes you get out of the house, so you can start to feel better as soon as possible; after the relation ends.
Yes, even with the ugly parts; I really do love to both of them: One of the half of my heart, belongs to Aphrodite; and the other half… Belongs to Loki.
That's all in this post, and remember: If you are not ready yet for this kind of relation; don't be so hard with yourself, and just do it, when you have readed enough of the subject; and just take your time to think, if you want that relation with all the good and bad than may come.
Than you start this kind of relation when you really want it, and when your Heart and Soul; is really ready for that... So Be It!
#pagan writings#pagan writer#paganism#pagan advice#pagan goddesses#pagan gods#aphrodite deity#loki deity#real life experiences with the gods#to begginer pagans#to begginer wiccans#to begginer witches#pagans#pagan#eclectic pagan#ecletic pagan#hellenic pagan#lokean#pagan from the caribbean#pagan writer is a fool in love#than you can have any relation with deities where you find peace after the hard times#so be it
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"Things you said when we were safe."
Quinlar
This already gives me feelings.
A/N- So ummm this has been collecting dust in my inbox for-fucking-ever. But it's here now. And I think I'm going to slowly work on cleaning out my requests to give myself some purpose until I get myself re-employed. Side note: I made myself cry writing this. ENJOY. Bryce remembered it as if it had just happened. It was before Sofie. Before the Bone Quarter. Before the truth about the Asteri. Before she'd dove through a portal to gods knew where, and left everyone and everything she knew and loved behind.
The night was bright with stars, her own light seemed to sing to them. Just as theirs sang to her... And Hunt, stood beside her on the rooftop looking down at the city below. People moved without a care in the world, and for five minutes everything was at peace. They were at peace.
"Really, Quinlan?" He asked, smirk on his lips, brow raised. "Yes, really." She answered, "We have all the time in the world, I think we can both wait a little longer. We should take it slow, go through the motions." "Live for the experience?" He added with a chuckle. The sound had gone right through her. Had filled her with warmth, her light flared from her chest at the sound of it, and she'd tried to cover it with her hands to stifle it. "Exactly. We don't have anything to worry about anymore. You're free, and we can just--- I don't know... Be?" She rolled her eyes, but the smile never left her face. Calm. At peace. They were okay. He was alive. The halo was gone, he was free to do what he wanted, be who he wanted. Be with who he wanted. And she wanted him more than she'd ever wanted anything. Which was part of why she insisted that they wait. Get to know each other before they brought sex into the equation. Now a part of her wished they could go back. Go back to that moment, say fuck it to waiting. Because she'd have given anything for more time.
"That sounds good." He said, he pulled her against him with an arm around her waist as they both looked to the sky. He turned and pressed a kiss to the side of her head. "That sounds really, fucking good." "Bryce?" She'd hoped that when she came back to the present maybe she'd be at home. Maybe she'd be on the rooftop with Hunt, and maybe everything wouldn't be so broken. Instead she was in Velaris, a place made for someone like her with a star in her heart. But one she wanted nothing to do with. She lifted her hands to wipe at her eyes. It didn't matter. She'd find a way back. She had to. "You miss your home." Elain Archeron said, with a sweet but sad smile. "I miss my life. I miss my mate. I miss my annoying pain in the ass brother, and his friends. I want to go home." Saying it out loud didn't do shit but make her feel worse. "I understand that." She didn't offer any further elaboration. "Come on, dinners ready. And Feyre said she has something of an idea."
#quinlar#bryce quinlan#hunt athalar#elain archeron#hosab#post hosab#pre hosab#sjm fandom#fanfic#answered asks
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OK I JUST SAW YOUR POST AND I LOVE EVERYTHING YOU WRITE GIRL OMGGGG DONT EVEN RIGHT NOW. I USUALLY WAIT UNTIL YOUVE POSTED THE WHOLE STORY THO BECAUSE IM LITERALLY THE MOST IMPATIENT PERSON EVER AND I CANNOT WAIT I NEED TO BINGE READ EVERYTHING LMAOOO (also not to expose myself but im literally the anon who said they sobbed while reading ‘screens’ BUT YOURE JUST SOOOO GOOD IT MADE ME EMOTIONAL OKAY???)
OKAYYYY SOOOOO I LISTENED TO THE ONES YOU SENT AND OH MY GOODNESS !!!! THEYRE SO GOOD I ACTUALLY ADDED THEM ALL TO MY PLAYLIST AND I THOUGHT ID SHARE SOME OF MY FAVES WITH YOU <333
Ker Yegu (Solo Piano) - Yann Tiersen (this one is so good it actually distracted me from the book i was reading when i first heard it)
I’ve Been Thinking of You Every Single Day Ever Since - Laurence Ipsum
Simplicity - Aree
Nantes - Neil Cowley
and another song that’s NOT instrumental but it’s sooo good and i thought of you, i think you’d like it if you haven’t heard it already
cold/mess - Prateek Kuhad
sorry for the dump this was a lot!! but i just wanted to say thank you for entertaining this reallllyyy fun conversation with me i literally get so giddy when i see you replied to my ask i love hearing about all your opinions (no matter how unprofessional they may be, they’re really good as far as im concerned) and really, im open to listening to anything you recommend lmao BUT YEAH THIS IS LONG ENOUGH SO I HOPE YOURE DOING REALLY WELL AND IM SENDING LOVE ~🎶
Don't worry about dumping this! I'm so excited!
I did one listen through of each and here's what I thought:
Ker Yegu -- so pretty. Very peaceful, I actually wrote while listening to it! I’ve Been Thinking of You Every Single Day Ever Since - This is the kind of music I imagined would be playing when I was little and imagined falling in love. It reminds me of like sweet gentle smiles. Simplicity - this was so cute and gentle! I liked it so much! Nantes - i really liked the special effects (?) on this one. The ones that made it feel like it was spinning around my head. It was kind of centering if that makes sense! cold/mess - This is the cutest song in the world 😭 thank you for sharing it, I really really loved it! i could see myself writing a story about it 👀 It's very Zipper-Harry hahahaha
ALSO WHY ARE YOU WORRIED ABOUT EXPOSING YOURSELF. I'm SCREAMING! YOU'RE MY 🎀-anon!!!!! I've been so worried about you because I hadn't heard from you since I posted screens! Omg I'm so happy! 😭
Also, I totally get what you mean about waiting for the whole thing to be finished. I just found out that Bridgerton is doing the split season and I'm PISSED. It's so annoying. give me the whole show or don't. I honestly don't even know why I pay for netflix anymore.
Anyway! I'm so happy you shared these songs and that you're my 🎀 anon as well! I'm so happy! 💕
xoxo
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