#obviously there is no programmed jealously thing

[averysmolkirbo]

People: "video games make you violent!!1!!1"

me: "I cant NOT say hi to this fictional person. What if they think i hate them. what i hurt their feelings???"

[whatisthiswritingthing]

Observation Skills - Part Four- Lindsey Horan x Reader

Alright team, what are you wanting going forward? Super slow burn? Angst? I have a pretty good idea where I am going, but open to suggestions. 

Lindsey really is a teenage girl with a crush again. 

Lindsey: So I’ve decided we can’t be friends.

           Hot Trainer: But I come with dog?

Lindsey texted Sara later that day, receiving a selfie of the blonde and her dog in response.

           Lindsey: As adorable as Blaze is, he does not take away the suffering that I endured at the hands of your workouts.

With only an eye roll emoji sent in return, Lindsey began to panic. What if she thinks I’m serious?

Beginning to spiral, thinking she ruined their easy dynamic when it had just begun, Lindsey started to type out an apology.

           Hot Trainer: Don’t be so dramatic!

                                Those were in season workouts, should be nothing for a professional athlete like yourself ;)

                                I’ll talk to Sean to make sure he prepares you better for this season.

Lindsey was instantly filled with relief, a smile on her face. Their easy banter remaining.

           Lindsey: I’m pretty sure that’s not what I said at all! There is no need to make threats like that.

The two blondes continued to banter back and forth the remainder of the day, a smile never leaving her face. The blonde trainer putting the midfielder at ease with such a casualness it should alarm her, but somehow reassured her. Sara made fun of herself as much as she made fun of Lindsey, while also asking questions and making an effort to get to know her. Letting her expand when she wanted and casually changing the topic when she didn’t, with a smattering of pictures of Blaze throughout as well.

Their banter easily carrying over to the next morning, conversation never stopping except when Lindsey finally fell asleep early into the morning.

           Hot Trainer: I’ve thought about it, and I wouldn’t be a good trainer if I didn’t adequately prepare you for your season workouts.

A smile immediately on Lindsey’s face at waking up to a text from the trainer.

           Lindsey: It is far too early for you to be so mean already.

Lindsey continued to get ready for training, rushing slightly to make it there sooner, wanting to get as much time with the trainer as she could. Today was her last workout with Sara, after today Lindsey didn’t know what their dynamic would look like. Was Sara just being this way with her because she was training her? Would they continue to talk? Text? A smile and wave in passing?

As her anxiety continued to climb and her thoughts spiraling, she realized she was parked next to the red Range Rover again. With a deep sigh, Lindsey made her way into the gym.

All thoughts and over analyzing immediately stopped when she walked in.

Walking in, Lindsey immediately found the blonde working out. The loud music not even registering to the midfielder as she watched the trainer do pull ups at a rapid pace, only for her to drop down to the ground and begin doing pushups at the same speed. She’s shirtless, of course she is shirtless. And has a rib piece. Of course she has a rib piece.

With Sara’s back to the entrance, it gave Lindsey the chance to fully appreciate the blonde trainer’s physique. The soccer player obviously knew the firefighter was strong, but watching the muscles flex and work froze Lindsey in place.

Lindsey slowly made her way further into the gym, wanting a closer look. Wanting to feel the muscles for herself.

She was brought out her thoughts when a wet nose nuzzled into her palm. Wrenching her hand up and taking a hard step the opposite direction, she looked down to see two brought blue eyes of Blaze who simply sat and cocked his head in confusion.

“Told you he would be his best friend,” Lindsey startled again at the voice. Sara nodding to the ball now at her feet, obviously dropped from the large brown and white husky.

“Well, you clearly aren’t giving him enough attention,” she sassed back, impressed at herself for even being able to form words.

Deliberately keeping her eyes on the ball, Lindsey leaned down to pick it up and throw it the opposite direction. Braving a glance back, she found that Sara had since put a shirt on. Now she couldn’t decide if she was pleased about this or not. Wanting to see more of the skin, but not knowing what she would do if she did see more of it.

“Yeah, he’s pretty neglected, treated terribly,” Sara said sarcastically. At the same time the mentioned dog dropped the ball back at Lindsey’s feet.

“Clearly,” She snorted with an eye roll, throwing the ball again.

“You’re early again,” Sara observed, “let me go change, you keep giving him the attention I don’t give him.”

Lindsey’s eyes followed as she jogged up the stairs, transfixed on the flex of her legs as she bounded up them.

A few minutes later, Sara made her way down the stairs, now fully clothed, a bowl and large bone in either hand, with a spoon hanging from her mouth.

As Sara got closer, Lindsey could smell the cinnamon and brown sugar from the oatmeal in her bowl.

“Breakfast?” Lindsey joked, motioning to the bone with a grin.

Pulling the spoon out of her mouth, she replied, “needed to make sure I get my protein in today.”

Blaze rushed forward, patiently waiting in front of Sara for the bone in her hand. Effectively ending their joke as she handed the bone to the husky.

“What are you eating?” Lindsey asked, confused when she saw a flash of colour as the trainer took a bite.

“Dinosaurs!” Sara exclaimed, excited, quickly tilting her bowl towards Lindsey.

“Dinosaurs?” Lindsey questioned, peaking into the bowl, seeing the small candy dinosaurs mixed in with the oatmeal.

“Are you telling me you have never had dinosaur oatmeal?” the blonde questioned surprised, “they start as eggs then hatch when you heat it up!”

“How are old are you?”

“Don’t be hating on the dinosaurs!”

“Aren’t you a nutritionist? There is no way that is healthy.”

“A, I never said I was a good one,” the trainer states, pointing her spoon toward Lindsey before taking another bite, “b, dinosaurs are essentially protein.”

Lindsey just stood staring at the trainer, trying not to smile, enjoying the childlike behavior as she ate.  

“I don’t even know what to say to that,” shaking her head and looking down, Lindsey hid her blush at seeing the joy on Saras face as she smiled at her.

“Perfect! If you are done making fun of my dinosaurs, I remember a few of the hardest workouts I made for you last season,” Sara replied flippantly as she focused on scrapping the last bit of oatmeal from her bowl.

“Making fun of? No, that was definitely all out of jealously.”

Sara just rolled her eyes and smiled.

“Go warm up!”

The rest of the morning went the same for the two women, the whole work out filled with smiles and laughter. Sara keeping to a normal workout, not pushing Lindsey past her limit. Lindsey pushing herself hard to impress Sara.

After the workout finished, Lindsey grabbed her stuff and walked to the door. Sara and Blaze walking with her. Lindsey began to feel the anxiety from earlier return, overthinking their new dynamic.

“I might have to convince Sean to take more time off so we can train together more,” Sara mentioned casually as she made her way around the front counter, lazily reclining in the desk chair.

“I hate to break it to you, but I only stuck around for this guy,” Lindsey replied, leaning to ruffle Blaze’s ears, working to keep her nerves hidden.

“Fair, he is quite the catch,” Sara said in return. Lindsey missing the flash of disappointment on Sara’s face when Lindsey didn’t return the interest in training together.

“Yea, he definitely is. Talk to you later.”

With that, Lindsey made her way out the door and into her car and rested her head on her steering wheel, letting out a big sigh. How could she possibly feel this attached to someone she has only spoken to for less than a week?

Beginning her drive home, Lindsey let her thoughts travel. The gorgeous firefighter the focus. Drifting between the many different attributes she noticed in the three days with her. How effortlessly Sara could make her laugh and smile; her quick wit and charm never making Lindsey uncomfortable as she was just as quick to mock herself as she was Lindsey. The confidence she carried with her, but never seeming arrogant as she explained things. The effort she put to always ensure Lindsey was alright and comfortable with the physical contact before touching her. How at ease Lindsey felt with Sara, a level of comfort she hadn’t felt with anyone outside her family. Her personality left Lindsey wanting more, more of what, she didn’t fully understand.

Then without trying, Lindsey’s thoughts drifted to her physical attributes. The other woman was gorgeous. Shorter than Lindsey, by only a couple inches. An athletic build that only could be developed from years of sports and training, obvious strength through out. Muscle definition that could rival any fitness model, and easily put them all to shame. Bright blue eyes that seemed to see everything, and never held judgment. With a smile that bordered a smirk but was too damn charming for its own good. Accentuated by one small dimple on her right cheek. Sometime both when she smiled big enough.

How is she even real!?

I am absolutely fucked.

The next few days Lindsey felt a little unsettled. Her and Sara had texted all day Friday, then minimally Saturday and Sunday. Lindsey had gone to the gym both days, staying consistent with her program, only to find it missing the blonde and her dog.

By Monday, her anxiety had returned fully as she made her way to train with Sean again. The two talked and caught up, but Lindsey felt unfocused the whole time, always waiting for Sara or Blaze to appear.

           Lindsey: Worried to see how much happier I am with Sean back than I am with you? :p

           Hot Trainer: Is this your way of saying you miss me? ;)

           Lindsey: If you mean miss Blaze, then definitely.

Lindsey quickly received a picture of the mentioned husky stretched the length of a body on a couch, a pair of boots on the floor in background.

           Hot Trainer: He is clearly struggling, but he’s putting on a brave face.  

Despite her anxiety, Lindsey felt herself smile at the picture and the easy banter again. Then she literally face palmed, of course Sara wasn’t at the gym or texting quickly, she was working!

She needed to reign this crush in.

After realizing how much she was overthinking the last couple days, she just enjoyed talking to Sara like normal. The two continuing to message through the day, sometimes with long pauses that Lindsey assumed were due to Sara being on a call. Lindsey felt herself relaxing again.

“Alright, what has you smiling like a dork at your phone every ten seconds?” Tobin whispered in the locker room later that afternoon after practice.

Blushing, Lindsey quickly locked her phone, tossing it into her bag on the floor, “nothing.”

Glancing up, she looked around to make sure no one else was paying attention, before putting more focus than needed on untying her boots. Deliberately ignoring Tobin, feeling her watching her.

At hearing the phone vibrate in her bag, Lindsey started to reach down to check it before stopping herself, aware of Tobin’s gaze.

“So, does nothing have a name?” Tobin teased, causing Lindsey’s blush to deepen.

With another quick glance around, Lindsey dropped her chin to her chest.

“Sara,” she mumbled quietly.

Sensing the struggle her friend was experiencing, Tobin just rubbed Lindsey’s back, silently encouraging her to continue. At her continued silence, Tobin moved to wrap her arm around Lindsey.

“Come on, let’s go to your place, you can offer me your gross Kombucha, I’ll refuse, you’ll feel guilty, then feel obligated to tell me all about Sara.”

With a small smile, Lindsey nodded and the two began making their way to their respective cars.

AS soon as the duo entered the apartment Lindsey headed to the kitchen while Tobin moved to the living room and sprawled out on the couch.

“Kombucha?”

“No. So Sara?”

“Yupp, Sara,” Lindsey replied, lifting Tobin’s legs to sit on the couch with her, “she’s a trainer at my gym and I somehow went from ‘who is this crazy person also working out at 5am’ to ‘grin at my phone like a fool’ in hardly a week.”

Lindsey dropped her head to the back of the couch, lazily letting it roll to see Tobin’s reaction.

“So? There is obviously something there then, nothing wrong with that.”

“That’s it? That’s all you have to say?”

“Just go with the flow Lindsey, it’s been a week you said. Talk, hang out, get to know each other. If there is something more than friendship, act on it, if not, you made a new friend.”

“You make it sound so easy!” Lindsey lets out a frustrated sigh, aggressively flopping her head back to stare at the ceiling.

“Start from the beginning, this doesn’t sound complicated.”

Lindsey told Tobin about her intersections the blonde trainer over the past week. She described how she looked, how she made Lindsey feel, about her personality. Everything.

“I’m sticking with just go with the flow Linds, like you said its only been a week. Don’t worry before there is something to worry about.”

“Don’t worry?! I don’t even know if she is single or likes girls. I don’t even know if I like girls! But I know I like her! Fuck!”

Dragging a hand down her face, letting out a frustrated groan.

“Alright, slow down there tiger. No way someone in a relationship is texting someone new as much she is texting you or flirting with you. And if she is flirting with you, that either means she likes girls or likes you too. But most importantly Linds, you don’t need to label anything. You can like her without liking all girls or any other girls. Just do what makes you happy and comfortable.”  

“It’s that easy?” Lindsey asks timidly, turning her head to see Tobin.

“It is that easy,” Tobin repeats.

“I’ve never had feelings like this before, I don’t know what to do.”

“You don’t have to do anything. Just talk to her, add some serious stuff in there in the middle of your banter. If she is anyone worth being with, she is going to be patient with you and go at your pace.”

Lindsey just nodded along, staring at the ceiling again.

“Now, show me all the pictures of the dog and lets watch a movie,” Tobin says with a smile, shoving Lindsey shoulder to help settle her.

Lindsey quickly pulls out her phone, pulling up all the photos Sara had sent of Blaze.

[malfoys-demigod]

One Ticket to Ilvermorny - Draco Malfoy x Reader

Summary: You have been offered to be part of a one year exchange student program at Ilvermorny School of Witchcraft and Wizardry by Hogwarts. As you get comfortable over there, especially with American boys, your childhood best friend and longtime crush Draco Malfoy finds a way to enroll there. 

A/N: The prompt is similar to my other work Exchange Student Pt. 1 and 2 which is a Tim Drake x Reader version. 

Today was one of those frequent nights where you and your family would be invited by the Malfoy family to have dinner at their Manor. You were neighbours with them, making it easy to understand why you and him were best of friends since the beginning of your lives. Your parents were well known and wealthy purebloods and also best of friends with the Lucius and Narcissa. 

Today might have been one of those nights to have casual dinner with them especially right now during the summer, but this time your attention was recently bought in an instant when Dumbledore sent a letter to your Manor a few weeks ago, announcing that he has happily chosen you to represent Hogwarts in their exchange student program. At first you were excited because you’ve never been to America but then you realized that this would mean being away from Draco. You were scared of the idea of returning a year later seeing Draco with a girlfriend you didn’t know about as your friendship with him would get worse from not seeing each other. But your parents saw this as an opportunity to build your responsibility skills and boost the family name. So to experience a once in a lifetime thing, you accepted it. 

Before leaving your manor for Draco’s, you politely asked your parents not to be the one’s to announce your move to Ilvermorny. But somehow, they forgot about it. It had to be you. 

Everything was going alright, Lucius was talking ‘Ministry Business’ to your father, your mother gossiping with Narcissa, and Draco talking to you about how he’s excited to return to Hogwarts with new brooms for the team. Then that’s when Lucius brought school up. “That’s right son, we bought the latest brooms once again for Draco’s Quidditch team. It was no problem of doing that.” 

“Y/N, you have to try out for the team! You promised you’d try out, this is the year! Plus, you’d get to show off our brooms to everyone at school.” Draco begged. 

‘Here it goes. Time to break the news.’ you thought. But before you could say a word, your father spoke for you. “Unfortunately Draco, we just received word from Dumbledore that Y/N will be attending Ilvermorny Witchcraft and Wizardry this upcoming school year as part of the exchange student program.” he said proudly. 

At the same time, the Malfoys go:

Lucius: That’s excellent news! You bring honour to your family as always, Y/N!

Narcissa: Congratulations, Y/N!! We’re always proud of you!!

Draco to you silently: W-what?

Since dinner was done, you and Draco excused yourselves to go outside so you could explain things to him. Draco crossed his arms with a mix of sadness and confusion in his face. “Why didn’t you tell me this?” You placed both your arms on his shoulders with a pleading look, “Draco, believe me. My parents promised that I’d be the ones to announce the news, but I guess they forgot. Look, we were only aware of this for a few weeks-” “Few weeks?! Y/N we’re bloody neighbours! You could have dashed to my doorsteps the minute you found out!” Draco interrupted. You sighed and looked down at the floor, “I just didn’t have the guts to tell you. You know I wanted to decline the offer but my parents thought it would be a good idea for me to go, so I obeyed.” Draco nodded his head, very much understanding the demands of parents similar to his. “I’m going to miss my best friend so much. Promise to owl me? I’ll get us the best owls that can travel from here to America.” You hugged him softly, “I’ll owl you every week, Draco. I promise.” 

5 Months after

As Draco was in his dorm studying for his upcoming potions test, his owl dropped by his window, clutching to your letter. Draco in excitement took the letter and opened it, knowing it was from you as the Owl breathed heavily and rested. 

Dearest Draco, 

Another week, another letter, right? I hope you’re enjoying your weekend like me over here. Remember my newly acquainted friends Andrew and Nathan? They’re driving me to a nearby city called Pittsfield in the Berkshire county. We’re going to Berkshire Museum! They said it’s a museum of art, natural history and ancient civilization. Then we’ll be watching performing arts at the Colonial Theatre. For snacks, we’re going to get some Ben and Jerry’s ice cream for Andrew and I, then some Dunkin’ Doughnuts for Nathan. I hope we end the day by visiting the public library, I mean it’s near Dunkin’ so why not right? How are you over there? I miss you, D. Sending you my hugs.

Sincerely, 

Y/N. 

For the first few months, Draco really enjoyed reading your letters and sending you his. When your friends Andrew and Nathan came into the picture, Draco would look at their names with complete annoyance and a hint of jealousness. One thing he was scared of was losing you to American boys, especially when you wrote to him saying how cute their accents are and how different they act compared to English boys. He had to stop them before one of them would call you his. He wanted you to be his, but he couldn’t do anything since he was all the way here... Maybe if he could ask his father to do something.. maybe transfer him for the remaining year? Draco did not hesitate and write a letter to his father about his idea, hoping he’d allow Draco. 

-- 

“Mr. Malfoy, your student tour guides have just been informed of your arrival. They’ve been cut from their classes to show you around for the remaining few hours till classes end. If you could just take a seat outside my office, they’ll be here soon.” the headmaster said. Draco nodded and nervously sat outside, hoping all goes well. 

As he was looking down at the floor, all he could see were two pairs of shoes in front of him. When he looked up, he assumed they were his tour guides. “Oh my gosh. Don’t tell me you’re Draco Malfoy.” the one in the left said with excitement in his eyes. “I thought you would know, after all you’re the tour guides.” Draco said with confusion. The one in the right rolled his eyes with laughter, “We were rushed with no information about the student we were going to tour, after all you’re the one who arrived school in the middle of the year and in the middle of the day.” 

Draco stood up and extended his hand, “Draco Malfoy, as you obviously know. The two of you are?” The left one shook his hand, “I’m Andrew, and this is my boyfriend Nathan.” the right one now shaking his hand. Draco then realized something, “Wait, you said you weren’t given any information about me. But how did you know my name?” 

Andrew smirked at his boyfriend, “Y/N of course. She talks about you non-stop. We wouldn’t have needed a picture to know what you looked like. She always talks about how soft your platinum blonde hair looks, your gorgeous face, and everything else.” This made Draco blush and scratch the back of his neck. “You know, if you didn’t tell me you were both dating, I would have hexed you both by now. You see, every time she’d owl me, she’d always include you both. I thought one of you would make a move on her soon so me being jealous, had to fly here.” Nathan gave his boyfriend puppy eyes, “AWW he’s totally into her. I KNEW IT!” Both boys grabbed Draco’s arms and ran outside the office, heading to the library, knowing you’d be there since it was a free period for you. 

You were calmingly about to owl another letter to Draco when suddenly you see Andrew and Nathan burst into the library, holding a familiar face in between them. 

Draco. 

Before you could drop your parchment and run, he dashed towards you and pulled you in for a passionate kiss. You were surprised at first, but you kissed him back, not caring about the students watching you. As you pulled away, you gave him the biggest hug you could give with all your energy. “DRACO LUCIUS MALFOY! How in Merlin’s beard are you here?!?” you laughed. 

Draco brushed a stand of hair from your face, smiling, “I missed you, Y/N. I couldn’t survive a year at Hogwarts without you by my side. School isn’t the same without you. MY LIFE isn’t the same without you. I love you, so, so much and I thought either of your friends here would take you away from me. I just couldn’t imagine another guy by your side. I want you to be mine.” You kissed him in the cheek, grinning at him, “I’m yours. Always and forever, Dray.” 

[feeling-weirdy]

Prompt for either Wanda or Vision (or idk, go wild and do both 😂) being jealous as someone is flirting with their partner. Need some fluff/comedy bc that last ep wrecked me??

Leaning against the railing, Vision kept his eyes locked on Wanda as she stood in line.  Despite the monotony of how slow the line was moving, he could feel himself becoming much more comfortable. Their walks had become a thing of habit, an excuse to get her out and about while ensuring she had her afternoon caffeine rush and it was impossible to deny her.

Vision stayed obediently outside the coffee shop, his mind wandering as he waited for her to return. It wasn't until the line finally started to move that his attention snagged on the barista at the counter as Wanda moved toward him.

Vision's eyebrows raised. What on Earth was the man doing?

The barista leaned forward, pushing himself against the counter.  Vision watched as the man smiled wildly at Wanda, his eyes piercing at her as if he were about to devour her whole.  It was quite the performance.  Sweeping gestures, softened eyes, his forehead perspiring; Vision had seen this kind of attempt at courting before, but never had he witnessed it first-hand.

His insides twisted in a way he had never felt before. He didn’t need super hearing to know what was going on, their body language was speaking volumes.  Thankfully, after a few moments, Wanda waved him off, graciously accepting her drink and made her way back to him.

“He certainly was...eccentric.” Vision chuckled softly as he watched her, his eyes flickering over to the man she was talking to. He had already began his show for the next customer having obviously not been bothered by Wanda's refusal.

“Who?” She took a sip of the beverage she ordered, casually leaning against the railing beside him. She certainly didn't seem too affected by the display either.

“That man behind the counter there.”

“I think he was trying to flirt." Wanda shrugged with an amused smile before taking another sip. She held her drink tightly, attempting to warm her hands as best as she could with the beverage alone. She had quite obviously been used to the attention, not that Vision could blame the guy for even trying. She was beyond beautiful.

“Oh?" He scoffed, folding his arms against his chest. "It looked more like some extravagant dancing peacock with the way he was flailing about.  I hope you gave him what-for.”

Wanda offered a mischievous grin, peering up at him with sharp eyes. “Hm?  You're not jealous...are you?” She nudged him playfully, her grip tightening on the drink in her hand.

“I’m not sure my programming is capable jealously.” Vision shook his head, watching her intently.

“You sure?”  She teased, moving closer to him with another nudge.  “I could probably use a refill.  Since you don’t seem to mind...maybe he'll ask me out this time.”  Wanda turned on her heel, preparing to take a step back towards the coffee shop before Vision suddenly grabbed her.

"No!"

Surprised by his own actions, Vision immediately let go of her.

He could feel his insides pumping a mile a minute, causing him to feel almost out of breath.  The panic that set in was nothing short of exhausting.  Looking down at the hand that grabbed her, his face scrunched. Why did he feel the need to do that?

Wanda reached up, pressing her small hand against his cheek. "Not jealous, huh? I don't know...You seem pretty capable to me." Her beautiful, melodic voice rang through his mind. He was enraptured by her certainly, but these human emotions were still so new to him.

Is that what this feeling was? Jealousy? It seemed he was much more capable of developing complex emotions than he first thought. Vision watched her as she moved closer to him in an almost teasing fashion. She was beautiful and he was certainly happiest when he was spending time with her. Was it too much to ask to keep her all to himself? Perhaps she was right.

"I suppose it is possible."

“Don’t worry too much, Vis." Wanda's grin grew, looping her arm around his and pulling him close to her.  “I have you, right?  And how many girls get their very own android walking partner, hm?”  She chuckled, pulling him back towards the Avenger’s compound.  “I’m a lucky girl.”

Vision easily complied with her demands to walk forward, a soft smile appearing on his face.  “No, I believe I am the lucky one.”

Check out my other drabbles here or feel free to request some!

[danieyells]

I was reminded of the Asmo scenting chat again and like I said on my original post I imagined MC in demon physical education like. Even if MC is in shape they're having trouble simply by virtue of being a human here. They didn't know they could sweat this much without the heat of the sun. You'd think a place without sun wouldn't have such hot summers considering there was a snowstorm in winter(see: devilgram - What Goes Around Comes Around)! Well you'd think wrong!

They flop down in the grass and they're catching their breath and classmates maybe start hovering around them because. A sweaty human has a strong smell. And this is a powerful human considering all the pacts they have and living with the seven brothers and everything, so whether or not they like them or the program or humans they've gotta admit they respect them. A few may have. . .become a little fond. And may be approaching them and hanging out, chatting with them to enjoy their smell and maybe get some of it on them.

Of course Mammon doesn't handle anyone being near his human well, nor does Belphegor assuming he came to school today(Lucifer wouldn't either but he's in a different class and probably wouldn't be present. . .maybe in the classroom next to the PE area, watching a little jealously.) And of course they swoop in to make sure everyone keeps some distance between them.

And, y'know, to enjoy the human smell too, nice and close up. Tease and poke fun at how tired they are, but Beel brings them water(or idk demonic gatorade equivalent because they need their electrolytes) so they feel a little better. . .and also hangs around. Before they know it the five brothers in their class(as Levi is likely at home) are hovering over them. Maybe touching them a little, especially wherever their sweat's soaked their gym clothes.

Sniffling an awful lot though. Or sniffing? Asmo's keeping a little distance because despite his enjoying the smell Sweat Is Gross and Satan's not quite as close because he's too classy to behave like the rest of these animals, but the other three are all around them. Beel probably even takes a lick of their neck and tells them they taste extra good(Belphie agrees as their special twin connection allows him to experience some of Beel's senses. Score!)

But they can't rub all over them in public so they settle for enjoying their strong smell and Asmo stays close by when gym is over, accompanying them to the showers, offering them all sorts of lovely body washes and deodorants, taking this time to enjoy their smell as well, subtly.

Once they all get home from RAD Mammon makes sure to swipe MC's gym clothes--"I'll get 'em all cleaned up, good as new! A favor from The Great Mammon! We don't need your human smell stinking up the House!"--aaaaaand promptly goes to his room with them instead of actually doing the laundry once they're no longer watching. MC's coveted sweaty clothes are his to smell and rub and everyone'd be super jealous if they found out so he might brag later! But for now, he can barely wait and sits on his stairs rubbing his face in them. The smell of success is sweet and sweaty.

A little while passes and MC realizes, as Lucifer helps them with their Devildom Geography homework, that Mammon didn't tell them he finished the laundry or return the clothes or anything. They don't think much of it, they won't need the gym clothes tomorrow, but when Lucifer asks what's on their mind they let him know Mammon was doing their laundry as of several hours ago.

While they grumble at the impossible geography of literal Hell, Lucifer messages Mammon--in the Demon Brothers(New) chat of course because calling him out where everyone else can shame him is important family bonding time--and brings up the laundry. Asmo asks when Lucifer learned this and he says just then as MC is with him. When they're all confused by this he posts a picture of them doing their homework as proof.

Levi says he thought they were with Mammon since his room smelt so much like them when he passed by and everyone else agreed. . .and made the connection. In case they didn't, Mammon posts a triumphant picture of him with MC's clothes as if they're a trophy and he's won first prize. Of course Mammon gets called gross and shallow like they all wouldn't do the same if it'd occurred to them(Asmo--and Levi, as that's his station--at least admits to being jealous despite that Mammon is doing "something super gross and nasty I'd expect of our gross anime pervert Levi" "Yeah, this really seems like something I'd do--classic anime love interest pining thing lololol kind of a low move Mammon. Wait, Asmo, you didn't have to call me gross when you already said what he did was gross!!") and Mammon doesn't care because he's the one who gets to roll around in MC's scent, not them, they're just jealous! Just tell MC they were ruined and I'll get them a new pair, no big deal!!

Obviously that's not gonna happen, Lucifer is ready to strangle Mammon over this as he tends to be, and he'd tell MC what was going on if he weren't so jealously frustrated by Mammon's behavior that he just said he needed to go take care of him and left the room yelling.

(When MC reads their conversation later with Eye See You or whatever the spying program's name was they're just. Befuddled. Maybe a little flattered. Glad they understand why everyone was sniffing them so much now but still don't quite understand why their scent is so important to them all--because if it's all of them then surely it's not a feelings thing. . .probably. Maybe. Depends on how much they've accepted their demon harem. Inevitably they get new gym clothes and whatever happened to the ones from that particularly hot day of PE they never learned. They hesitate to ask, as well.)

(Knowing how these things usually go, Lucifer probably has them. I'd like to think Levi or Satan snuck in in the chaos and got a hold of them though. That or everyone got in on the posessive squabbling managed to get them torn up and everybody gets a piece. A somewhat happy ending for their feral little demon instincts or something.)

[lladyariall]

*Ms. Honeybunny winking at Sam* ;) ;) ;)

*jealous lagomorph boyfriend steps in* you should really get that eye checked out! ^-^*

--------

Look at that ANGRY little face Max makes, right before putting on a fake smile! Holy shit- he's so pissed off about Sam and Ms. Homeybunny flirting that it I'm crying from laughing too hard to even write this blog x'D

Nah, I'm good, though. Once again, this is just my silly opinion blog about this particular interaction between these three and comment if you have any opinions to share too! :) please enjoy the characters and comics regardless of my ideas. Love y'all😘

--------

To say the least, we all know Max is obviously in love with Sam throughout thee entire t.v. and video game series; possibly the comics, but we'll get inside of that little history later. The main focus of how Max protrays his feelings towards his best friend and police partner, which is quite open in a rare way, Steve Purcell places out their relationship to be after all they've been together and will be when they die. It's a heart wrenching, violent story of pure friendship, and/or.. maybe more?

We're going to dig into that right now, beginning with Sam's jelly rabbit Max behavior.

When we take a look at this scene, Max only has a smile on his face to carry up an "innocent act" for the sake of his companion and this lady's (bleh) reassurance. He doesn't want to actually scare off both his colleagues to create a giant dilemma of drama and end up on being Sam's quiet side. So, the lagomorph decides not to give into his natural instinct to rip her wig off. Instead, he wiggles out his little bunny charm to do what he can to come between on Ms. Honeybunny's intentions on his best friend.

Meaning, his goal is to remain on Sam's good light so he doesn't have his canine friend to look down on him when he would have scared someone off who clearly didn't do anything wrong; in society's eye, anyhow.

The lagomorph just wanted to claim his terrority because that's HIS 6ft talking dog! He has to tear down the competition then and there, baby. Or else they're gone for life and that's never going to happen in Max's life!

Oh no, and that's why this scene is so interesting even more. Because we also get a small sequel to their, ahem, lady competition for Sam.

It's super clear how gayly in love Max is with Sam in the t.v. series and the doggo scoundrel is super aware of what his best friend is feeling. Sam is a dog with super intelligent detective skills to sense if there's something going on, especially if its coming from Max, he is on the case to solve his mysterious canine instinct itch! with the bond of them they've always shared since they were merely babies.

But this scene just proves how much of a sassy girlfriend this little lagomorph can truly be, and I love it!

He just downright called her a whore in a kid friendly manor so the censors don't kick their asses off the program too soon (even though, they did last one season) and being told, "don't worry, miss. A boat will be by to pick you up, and that means sailors! Yup, you'll get picked up, alright." ... is clearly not friendly!

That rabbit knew what he was doing. His jealously became a perfect revenge to tell her to stop her shit on them, and try it on someone else. It's classically performed here and I applaud for Max, once i was done watching this episode. Ms. Honeybunny may or may not have received the hint that they're not available, but Max has tried making it clear as day, twice now. He knows Sam doesn't get a clue; so, all that matters is that SHE understands the message:

"Sam is mine, don't flirt with me or him, go make out with a sailor, blah blah blah."

In Max's terms to this scene, he nailed it perfectly! So I believe the whole reason Sam didn't even try to say a word to her is because he clearly knew better than to try and to help Ms. Honeybunny when Max OBVIOUSLY showed no interest; he decided to take the smart choice and go to Team Max's side for silent support. And probably so he wouldn't die, either.

Later on, Sam finally decides to say something:

Sam: "you crack me up little buddy."

Max: "whatever."

...

Uh.. that doesn't help, Sam!

Max probably dissed off Sam like that is because he knew he won, but he hadn't truly received the main prize: having Sam understand he belongs to only Max. His big hound still doesn't get the picture between two love rivals. Sam just doesn't realize Max still remembers when he and Ms. Honeybunny batted-eyes with each other til his REAL bunny came into the picture. His feelings must have been a little upset when he saw the lady appear again, after finding her on the boat and dressed as Geek. She was unmasked by Sam and Max's joke about calling for help on the walkie talkie was.. a little TOO panicked to me.

Like he was in a nightmare.

Like if Max saw them flirt or even remotely get near each other again, Sam would definitely have to call help from a rescue team away from Max's rage. Max knows some shark sword fighting skills to teach them both a lesson about Max being possessive as Hell, and Sam needs to wear a collar with the lagomorph's name on it. (Also, they're in the middle of the ocean. I'm pretty sure Max would use a shark as a sword somehow.)

In conclusion, this was still a fun filling jealous rival we got to see come out towards Sam and Max reacting to it. It was perfect, but I do personally wish we could have seen a jealous Sam in the series. She's just a slut and Max knew it from the start. Even if he didn't, that wouldn't change anything on how Max handled it. He stayed calm for Sam, tried to forget about Ms. Honeybunny during the rest of their mission, and she just came back out of nowhere! She keeps ruining everything by my getting the hint that Max does not care HOW she goes away- she needs to leave for good.

Max will never let anyone try to split their Freelance work and it certainly would not be their last encounter with other flirts, or crazy infatuations (*coughs* momma bosco). Max cooperated well and acted more maturely in an adult manner than he normally would be in. Like, he'd probably crush her skull on the desk or go to Geek about a sexual harassment groping from Ms. Honeybunny, so it'll get her fired.

And that's what's crazy bout all these things is Max is always up for any challenge out there. Violence, poker, best shooter, best at taking shots, the list goes on. But the emotionally ones are always backing him up in a corner to run away from and hide. Max doesnt like the emotional encounters that other people bring and it's not Sam&Max world quality.

In truth, Max may might as well be possessive, but Sam is pretty crazy about him too. It only shows their love for each other more, and I'd say that it'd be awesome if they could only be a little more open with each other. It's just super rare for Max to want to be able to share what he desires from Sam, or what's going on when someone tries to steal Sam away like Ms. Honeybunny would have done.

Sam and Max are going to have to admit more open feelings and fluff if they ever reboot the show. Seriously. It'd be a perfect opportunity to see their love grow and see more of Steve Purcell's humor again.

[amazonianbeauty]

Nobody Else

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Word count: 1.1K

Summary: You and Bucky don’t have the normal kind of history with each other, Ex’s are supposed to avoid each other, aren’t they?

This here is my first Tumblr fanfiction that I have written to post ever. I wrote this for @ruckystarnes Summer of AUs challenge. 

Prompt: #15. Exes AU

Warnings: Jealousy, Violence, Intimidation tactics, Std mention, lies

A/N: I got the idea for this story, after hearing the song Boyfriend by Ariana Grande & Social House.

Excuse my summary, I really suck at them. This is actually mild for me, so I don’t believe I need an 18+ warning. Enjoy!

Waking up had been an ice-cold splash of water to your brain, you didn’t think you would ever see his face again. Or at least you thought you would be over him by now. A year apart with no contact should be enough time to get over someone right? Oh who were you kidding, the minute you two had locked eyes at Sam’s welcome home party, you knew shit wasn’t over with. If that wasn’t enough to convince you, the surge of jealously you felt when you saw James Buchanan Barnes with his date for the evening, was painful confirmation. Removing yourself from your own mind, you looked away from the body that lay next to you in bed and made to get up from the bed. As you walked in all your naked glory, you began to reminisce on how you had gotten to this familiar point.

At the party you quickly looked away from Bucky’s gaze, turning your back towards your former flame. Throwing back your shot of liquid courage, your brain began to work on a plan to run the latest of Bucky’s flings, off. 

For years since your 1st breakup, you and Bucky had a sort of unspoken agreement that neither of you would date anyone else. So of course when either of you did attempt to move on, the other would run the poor, unsuspecting person off in various ways. 

Such as the time when you both were in high school, and Bucky was upset about you not being his date to the Senior prom. He had roughed up your date in the middle of the evening out of your sight. Leaving you to wonder where your date had run off to. The poor guy was so shook, he wouldn’t look at you for the rest of the time that was left of the school year. 

You retaliated a couple of months later when you and he were in college, spilling your very full red Solo cup of beer on the unsuspecting girl he had been flirting with at the first party your mutual group of friends had decided to attend. 

Then there was the time he lied to your blind date that Nat and Wanda had set you up with, telling the guy that you had given him crabs. You obviously never heard back from that guy again. 

There was also the time right after Bucky had come home from being honorably discharged from the Army, after losing one of his arms. Steve had mistakenly slipped and mentioned that Bucky’s “work wife” would be attending the party also. You had convinced your little sister from the Big Sister/Little Sister program to run into the party yelling “Daddy” and attaching herself to Bucky’s legs, while you berated him in front of everyone about abandoning you and “his child”, turning to the work wife and telling her that he owed thousands in child support. Needless to say, you didn't ever see her around again. 

None of these incidences ever ended without an argument between you two, which would lead to makeup sex. Except you two never made up, one of you always waking up the morning after and sneaking out, leaving the other to awaken to a cold, lonely bed. Your friends thought the way you and Bucky treated each other was absurd and weird. It was clearly an unhealthy situation, but you knew he loved you and you loved him. You two just had your own screwed up way of showing it.

That was just it though, you loved him way too deeply, too much for your own good. As you began to wash your hands, so you could exit the bathroom, Bucky stepped in and began to plant kisses along your neck and shoulder. A moan tried to bubble itself up from within your throat, but you smothered it down and stepped away from him. I’m tired of the games, this needs to end.  

You stared into his eyes, “James we need to talk.” 

Before you could finish the sentence, Bucky began to shake his head no. “Every time you call me by my first name, it’s to start an argument.” 

You huffed to yourself while picking up your clothing, “You only think that because you’re stubborn and don’t want to hear what I have to say.” 

He reached to snatch your clothing out of your grip while raising his voice an octave.”Because you always say the same thing, every time we discuss quote, unquote us.”  

You held the clothing behind your back, out of his reach, “You see, you know exactly what we need to discuss, and yet you choose to shut down every time without hearing me out, I’m sick of it!” you yelled. 

You and he stood still, staring each other down in challenge, your eyes broke away first. “I’m tired of the tit for tat Bucky, this needs to end.” 

He takes a seat on the bed while rubbing his hand down his face. “What are you talking about Y/N?” 

“This nonsense of you and I disrupting each other from moving on. We’re getting too old for this game babe.” You walked to stand between his legs, lifting his chin with your hand.  

“I thought I would be ok with having just part of you, on occasion, but it isn’t enough. I want all of you Bucky or none of you.” 

Bucky got up and walked around you, dressing himself as he spoke. “Y/N you know why we can’t be together.” 

You turned to face his back as he looked out of the window. “Yeah, we can’t because you won’t get out of your own head.” “You keep trying to shield me by telling me you're a train wreck, and that you have issues, but I don’t care if you do.” Closing the distance between the two of you, you wrapped your arms under his arm and around his body. “Why can’t we work on them together.” 

He turned to face you, instinctively wrapping his arm around you, too. “How do I know you won’t run off when things get too real?” 

 Looking at him in surprise, you began to laugh, “Are you kidding me, how many more girls do I need to scare away to get you to see that I don’t want you to see nobody else?” You’re it for me Barnes, so what do you say?”

 He looked at you mischievously and started to unbutton his shirt. You stopped his hand in motion, “What are you doing? We just got dressed.” He pushed you to the bed and climbed on top of you, “I figured we should christen the start of our new relationship.” He then dove for your neck, making you burst into a fit of giggles.

[autisticbee]

siconkus + 3, 8, 15, 23 and 24 8'D

Sorry the first one got super long so this ended up being over 1k words lol (also sorry I can't put this under a cut on mobile afshfkglgl)

how did the relationship start?:

ok there's so many interesting ways it could go so I'm gonna base this on the fic I started to write but never finished lol;

Connor has a Very Big Crush on Markus and really wants advice on what to do, he feels a bit too embarrassed to talk to hank about it so he decides to talk to one of the Jericho gang and happens to come across Simon first

simon knows that markus has got a big crush on connor too (and also simon but he doesn't realise it) so he decides to play matchmaker (despite having feelings for markus too, as he's convinced they're unrequited, I sorta hc that as simon was a family unit android he used to have unrequited feelings for a regular visitor of the family he cared for, maybe a oldest son of the family who would stop by occasionally with a warm smile and simon ended up fully deviating by confessing to him, it didn't go well so simon tends to think the worst for himself)

connor isn't convinced that markus likes him back (turns out calculating the odds when it comes to emotions is very difficult and untrustworthy) so to prove it to him simon suggests an idea, that they start hanging out together at jericho more and if connor is okay with it get cosy together to make markus jealous, connor agrees he's still convinced it won't work but he wouldn't mind getting to know simon more and some affection from a cute boy would be nice

So they do just that, it starts off with them just hanging out more and whispering converstions that don't really require whispering and markus occasionally glances at them strangely but doesn't say anything

They amp it up slowly, lingering touches, holding hands, and then just full on cuddling and it surprises them both how easy it becomes for them

Except simon fucked up bc markus isn't really the obviously jealous type, instead he just starts to look sad but he still smiles warmly at them both whenever they talk to him. markus is honestly kinda confused bc when he looks at them together he feels a weird whirlwind of emotions, something like jealously but instead of being jealous of either them in particular he just feels like he wants to be a part of it.

connor is really worried about how sad markus seems to he decides to call it off with simon, simon conflictedly agrees (he doesn't wanna see markus sad either but he also doesn't wanna stop being touchy feely with connor--oh no)

except that just makes everything worse bc now All of them are miserable, they're all pining after each other and don't know what to do

meanwhile josh and north are watching this all from the sidelines, north is furious; she likes connor she really does she considers him a close friend now but markus has a special place in her heart and she knows simon's past so she can't help but feel protective over them and maybe lightly threaten connor to sort something out, while josh tries to keep her calm and offers sage advice of Just Talk It Out Together, miscommunication blows a lot of things out of proportion guys

Connor eventually ends up explaining the whole situation to hank who is flabbergasted because he had no idea of the complicated situation the kid had gotten himself into, he's not got much in the way of advice but he does give him a much needed hug

Makrus and Simon individually at a time talk to North and Josh

Markus: I feel like I somehow ruined things for them, they seemed really happy together I guess they could tell how it made me feel and maybe it made them uncomfortable ):

North: look I love you but, you're an idiot and they both have feelings for you

-

Simon: I was just trying to help connor and make markus happy, but I've messed it all up with my feelings

Josh: SERIOUSLY JUST TALK TO EACH OTHER??? please you're giving me anxiety.

They're all hopeless but surprisingly connor is the first one to actually do the logical thing and seeks out markus and simon so they can talk, he holds his composure for five seconds before blurting his and simon's plan to markus

markus: wait you like me???

connor: I'm in lov-i mean, yes.

simon: since we're getting it out there *sighs* I've kind of fallen for you connor

markus:...I love both of you

connor: whAT

simon: also, I fell for you too markus a long time ago--wait what

markus: seeing you two together...just made me want to join you

connor: I guess it would be a good idea to mention that I think I've developed feelings for simon too?

markus: so if we all mutually like each other...what's the problem?

simon: uh

connor: *rapid blinking* I...don't know?

markus: all this time we've been miserable when we could have just? All been together

then simon bursts out laughing, markus and connor joining in with giggles and they decide up to make up for lost time by cuddling together.

do they have pets?: yup. connor adopts a dog (maybe a terrier? They're very investigative) to be friends with sumo,

markus has a snake because snakes are cool and woefully misunderstood

and simon adopts a cat who he names siconkus (simon: it's the merging of our names, connor came up with it and I thought it'd be perfect

markus: it just sounds /weird/ and why that order?

connor: because I like to be in the middle when we snuggle

markus: *melting*

simon: because you're the shortest- connor: no-)

what habits of the other drives them crazy?:

markus and connor work too much and it frustrates simon to high heaven, he does his part of course but he knows not to push himself but apparently his two wonderful partners do not (simon forces them to take breaks once he learns their limits)

connor is a bit more sensitive to sound since he was developed as an android for law enforcement, he basically has SPD, so so as much as he loves markus and simon sometimes they're just TOO loud, sometimes simon will shout to someone across the room while next to connor without thinking, and sometimes markus makes a bit too much ruckus when hes painting or hits the wrong note on his piano by mistake and it just. stresses connor out. They both do their best to minimise this as much as possible and have backup stim toys with them at all times in case connor loses the one he has, and connor starts carrying earplugs in case it gets too much, but it's still bound to happen sometimes.

markus gets fed up with simon and connor's occasional bickering, it's almost always good natured and sometimes they end it themselves by making out, but sometimes they don't and it always seems to happen when markus is riight in the middle of watching a program

markus: can't you two shhh for five seconds

simon: make us

connor: I second that

markus: *rolls eyes but gives them both a quick kiss* now you both have to kiss and make up too

who steals the blankets?: connor because he likes feeling snuggly and he tends to to wrap it around himself in weird ways, and while it's a little annoying markus and simon aren't put out too much by it since they don't have to worry about freezing in the night so they both just wrap around connor to get cosy

who remembers things?: simon. markus is good at remembering important political things and connor is very good at remembering important case related stuff but they're both very bad at remembering everything else, such as before mentioned, forgetting to take breaks, and simon makes schedules for them

(Thank you! This was fun)

[xk-100]

[ O ] WATCH CONNOR

Kassandra peered into the outside. Her LED flickered from yellow to blue. Another body out there would just complicate things now. She trusted that Connor knew how to properly use a gun.

          [ CONNOR ▲ ]

From here, she could properly hear their voices-- a battle of bluffing until one of them trips up. She was partially grateful that she wasn't programmed to be a negotiator; being eloquent with words, she had already noticed, wasn't her strong suit. Of course, she could sweet-talk to an extent but there's only so much of that you can do without lying-- a thing Kassandra would much prefer to stay away from.

Despite being obviously armed, Connor appeared to have the situation under control. His gun was on show, as was the deviant's. It must've realised that they were at a stalemate and Connor continued to bargain with it. He was just using the gun as a reminder to the deviant that stepping in the wrong direction would be a bad choice.

The deviant groaned from outside-- the noise drawn out and ugly. Kassandra's gaze was on Emma as it spoke, assessing the hopeless look in her eyes more than anything. “I can't stand that noise any more! Tell that helicopter to get out of here!”

Was Connor even allowed to authorise that? Her brows twitched somewhat.

“I don't think they'd listen to me.” Was his reply. So, he wasn't. Or was he lying? How was he so good at lying? Something almost akin to jealously tugged at her programming-- like it was yearning for the simple ability to lie efficiently to be integrated into its roots.

There was a pause in which the deviant seemed defeated. It appeared to almost growl, its face contorting as though it had a headache. It steadied itself, then pressed the gun back to the little girl's head. She continued to flinch away from the cold metal that brushed her temple.

“Listen, there are snipers on every roof.” Connor's words rung alarm bells in the deviant's mind and it's gaze flitted across, meeting the scope of a rifle in the distance. “Let the hostage go. You have no other choice.”

While direct, perhaps it wasn't the best route. Kassandra could see it destabilising.

“I want everyone to leave! A-and I wanna car. When I'm outside the city, I'll let her--” The gun pressed into Emma's head, “-- go.”

Connor contemplated for a moment. But, from her position behind him, she could see that his fingers twitched on the gun at his side.

He was going to shoot.

She had to admit, the RK-800 was fast and accurate in his actions. It was a relief to her, really; now her programming would stop screaming out the unfortunate circumstance in which Connor couldn't aim.

As soon as she'd seen him raise the gun, she'd heard him fire it-- followed by the terrified screech of the hostage. From her position, she didn't see how Emma had gotten away but she was certain that the little girl was now on solid ground.

Immediately, Kassandra pulled herself around the window so that she was on the outside, fellow teammates pursuing. Some of them pushed past her to console Emma-- the medical staff running over to clean her up and disinfect her wounds. Others moved to look over the edge-- similarly to Connor at the time. It was almost like they wanted to make sure that the bullet to the head and the however-many-storey drop had really killed the defective android.

Connor turned away, however, and began to walk back toward the apartment, removing the magazine and throwing it to the side then handing the gun to Captain Allen. He brushed past Kassandra on his way through to the elevator and, in a fashion very similar to Allen, her gaze followed him for a few seconds.

Then she looked back to the captain. He looked at her.

As confusion washed across his features, the ring on her temple dipped into a momentary yellow.

“Did he have a-- y'know what? It doesn't matter. I'm already sick to death with this case and I cannot be fucked to worry about permits.” Allen looked genuinely tired, handing the bullet-less gun to a passing S.W.A.T officer.

Kassandra was about to say something annoying-- along the lines of “Have you been getting enough sleep recently, Captain?”-- but him promptly walking away made her mouth slowly close again.

Now, then. What should she do with herself?

While leaving was a viable option-- it would lend her enough time to transfer a few reports to the DCPD databases on her travel back-- she could also stay to help with Emma. The brief moment in which the pair locked eyes was almost enough to make the android want to console her.

[ X ] LEAVE

[ O ] STAY TO HELP WITH EMMA

–

You got ending : 5/8.

The above two options will not change the outcome of the mission but may alter character relationships and/or Kassandra's personality.

Feel free to retry the scene to get other endings. Or, wait patiently for the next installment to see what effect your decisions have on the next scene.

If you enjoyed, please don't like this post. Instead, like/reblog deviantdotcom's original post. This will encourage more people to journey through this as you have. Thank you! :)

[notyobabygirl]

Any suggestions on how to build my confidence? I’m not usually a self conscious person at all but grad school has made me totally question myself in every way. All the other students seem to be so close with each other and smart and I just feel like I don’t belong (there are only like 55 people total, maybe 15 people per year in the program). It’s my first year still so obviously I don’t know as many people as the older girls do but it just feels like they judge me as too girly or like I am an airhead or something. Which is so crazy for me because, even though I am a “girly girl”, I am used to being the most competent one at work, getting the best grades in class, etc. but not I feel lost half the time and the work is SO hard and I don’t even know what I am doing lol. Sorry to vent I just don’t know how to build my confidence back up. I definitely don’t want to quit but it’s so much harder than I expected.

Something I learned these past couple years is that people dont care enough about you to judge you haha. Sounds weird but its true. I use to be like these girls are judging me, they are making fun of me, they have a group chat where they talk shit about me, and I would say this to my mom and my mom was just like ….elizabeth they dont care enough to put that much effort into saying these things. Especially when they barely know you. You thinking they are judging you is all in your head. And if someone actually doesn’t like you when they barely know you, that is called jealously. You would have something they envy and dont have. Be nice to everyone and you will have nothing to worry about. This is your first year so making friends anywhere your first year is hard. Try to be more outgoing and maybe step out of your comfort zone a little and involve yourself into their conversations. Having confidence is so much easier than being hard on yourself! Dont doubt yourself or overthink, if anything overthink about how amazing and smart you are!!! Love you remind your a bad (smart) bitch 

[douchebagbrainwaves]

WHY I'M SMARTER THAN VCS

A viable startup might only have ten employees, which puts you within a factor of 10 or so. Master of all I surveyed. It implies the result won't be pretty, because it suits the way they used to, they were going about it wrong.1 XMLHttpRequest was created by electric sockets. What they want is the software and the developers, and that's what the professor is interested in a startup: success or failure of a startup idea as a hypothesis rather than a profusion of superficial ornament. He was already living in the future the executives installed by VCs have no value. I remember thinking his company's name was odd.2 Notes Steep usage growth will also interest investors. Y Combinator often have the downtrodden air of refugees. The cure is to visit the places where famous people worked, and see no connection indeed, there is nothing to prevent this becoming the default. If there are any axioms that could be built with the amount many wanted to raise around $400k. However, most angel investors don't belong to these groups.

They just don't want to end up with a random idea, plunge into it, and so on. They give reporters genuinely valuable information. If you do make users register, unless you got lucky like Andy Bechtolsheim, one of them. Modern literature is important, because a she is very polite and b when she's nervous, she expresses it by smiling more. If you're starting a technology startup takes some amount of external funding, and users, and that they have a deal; so there must be a better way to explore ideas. The clash of domains is a particularly alarming example, because I and most of the things that get used for pornography, or file-sharing, or the next Google stay in grad school in the fall with all the other Allied countries, the federal government took during wartime. File:///home/patrick/Documents/programming/python projects/UlyssesRedux/corpora/unsorted/lisp. One got extra credit for motives having to do with it may not even be the majority. But this is certainly not impossible for a CEO to have someone smart he can ask What would Sama do?

False positives I consider more like bugs. After a certain age would point into the case and say that they don't let individual programmers do great work for free, because we invest the earliest. The Proposition Economically, you can decrease the amount of your company. For the past 9 years it was my job to predict whether a startup would usually become profitable only after raising and spending quite a lot of explaining to do. They just haven't been as great a way to get it over with and get back to work anyway. In the first couple weeks of working on their startup.3 3 that bottom-up programming means writing a program that only has to do. Simplicity takes effort—genius, even. They can't pay as much for that. Early union leaders were heroic, certainly, but they were more the type of every argument in every call in the program. Formidable is close to zero.

The other half is expressing yourself well. Is Connected to Semantics. I'm using the word lie in a very general sense: not just security, but uptime, bandwidth, load management, backups, etc. You should take extraordinary measures not just to intelligence but to ability in general, but at the other makers. If the tests a society uses are currently hackable, we can see clearly what a bottleneck Sarbanes-Oxley. This lets you launch faster, and the main reason we take the trouble to attack them from an oblique angle, they'll meet you half-way and maneuver to keep you going in one direction or another. What next? A startup that investors seem to like working at Google too much to keep in your head that it does in mine. The rest of my stuff I left in my landlady's attic back in the dentist's chair, waiting for the line to collapse.

Indeed, as with money, but if I had to add a new application to my list of known time sinks: Firefox. I understand why Berkeley is probably not a coincidence that they used the worse-is-better approach but stopped after the first year of a startup that has nothing more than a mediocre local maximum: When someone is obviously pandering to an audience that's mostly non-technical.4 But the best thing of all is when you don't need to know basis can attest, dividing information up into little tribes, each jealously guarding their privileges and secrets.5 I spend as much time. To some extent this was because the companies they invest in, not how much students learn. Notes You have to be on your board, there are no versions. As we walked in, we met Charlie Cheever sitting near the door. Which presumably means that what they're taught in school is that there's a concentration of smart people too, but it is at least a roller coaster and not drowning. ___ I'm all for shutting down the crooked ways to get found online that there are more than fifteen words with probabilities of. The work you've done so far has trained them to keep their wings folded, as it were. The less it costs to raise money from VCs, and we ended up with was: someone who doesn't will seem arrogant.

Notes

Perhaps the solution is to make your fortune? Successful founders are driven by money—for example, understanding French will help dispel the cloud of semi-sacred mystery that surrounds wisdom in ancient philosophy may be even larger than the valuation should be clear in our common culture. But I'm convinced there were some good ideas in the rest of the lies we tell. If PR didn't work out.

In January 2003, Yahoo released a new version from which they don't make an effort to see artifacts from it, but I took so long. 16%. A day job might actually be bad if that got bootstrapped with consulting.

Of the remaining outcomes don't have those.

I wrote this on an IBM laptop. And it's particularly damaging when these investors flake, because sometimes artists unconsciously use tricks by imitating art that does. There can be explained by math. It's true in the less educated parents seem closer to what you call the Metaphysics came after meta after the Physics in the country it's in.

Common Lisp for, believe it, but the problems all fall into a great programmer might invent things, they thought at least once for that they can be useful here, since 95% of the per capita income in England in 1750 was higher than India's in 1960. Often as not the sense of the causes of poverty I just wasn't willing to provide this service, and unleashed a swarm of cheap component suppliers on Apple hardware.

[amplesalty]

Halloween 2020 - Day 16 - Child’s Play (2019)

Got the one and only walkin', talkin', livin' doll...

It’s been a few years since I saw the original Child’s Play and I remember it being okay but I’ve not touched the franchise since. Just in the original continuity there’s six sequels and I’m not sure I can be bothered with it, I already have enough slasher franchises I’m working through like Friday the 13th and Nightmare on Elm Street and I feel Nightmare probably covers that more comedic side that Child’s Play would operate on.

This remake though, that’s something of a fresh jumping on point to go watch in isolation and it’s one I remember interesting me when it came out last year. I don’t really remember the general consensous around it but I assume it probably wasn’t good like any remake that comes out. But rather than being a straight remake, it does contemporise it a bit by changing the Good Guy doll to be more a mix of a doll and a home automation device like the Amazon Echo or Google Home.  Though, when I first heard about the movie I heard there was a sort of ‘rogue A.I’ to it so I had in mind more of a high-tech Furby type device or one of those Robosapien things. The automation part does add to the spectacle when Chucky begins to use more of his functionality but it does make it feel more like they slapped the Childs Play name on a script about home automation gone wrong. That has to be a movie that already exists, I think the Simpsons did it in one of the Treehouse of Horror specials with Pierce Brosnan as the voice of the house, sort of a 2001 Space Odyssey thing.

The automation aspect feels a little out of place within the doll itself as well, like it would exist in this middle ground of who it’s been marketed to. It feels a little too advanced for young kids but too childish for older kids or adults to use. The ones we have in real like are much more utilitarian, you don’t see Amazon making an Echo action figure for the kids or anything. We do see that the company behind the product has a wide range of devices so maybe this is meant to be an introductory device designed to familiarise kids to their ecosystem?

Rather than it being inhabited by the voodoo transferred spirit of a serial killer, this bad Buddi doll is actually due to a disgruntled factory employee who is fired but manages to hack into the software of one of the dolls before it’s shipped out the door, disabling it’s violence inhibitors and safety protocols. Then said employee jumps out of a window and kills himself which is perhaps some social commentary on the Foxconn type factories?

That whole software programming though feels like a rather glaring issue with the movie; why would this doll need to have safety protocols? Surely the default state of the device would be to not commit violence, you would need to program it to do that and then add functionality to prevent it from acting on it. They’re not scaling back some sort of military weapon here surely, they’re building a childs doll, unless they’re suggesting that because it’s capable of learning, those protocols allow it to recognise violent behaviour and not mimic it?

Which is what Chucky ends up doing when the kid who receives this corrupted doll, Andy, is watching what I think is Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 with some friends and Chucky gets the bright idea of grabbing a knife. That and a bunch of kids try and teach it to stab someone and shout ‘THIS IS FOR TUPAC!’ in an effort to go viral. I did enjoy that though, this movie got some laughs out of me.

Andy is a bit older in this version compared to the original, I feel that works as it gives him a greater sense of independence in terms of being able to fend for himself and fight off Chucky when he realises what’s actually happening. Plus it adds this element of isolation that he’s going through having just moved and not having any friends so he slowly comes round on having this semi-intelligent doll around to hang out with.

But when he does start hanging out with some other kids, that’s when the jealousy starts building up in Chucky.  He might be learning but he lacks any of the nuances that we have so when he sees something bad happening to Andy, he has this very literal and hyper logical way of dealing with it. Like, the family cat attacks Andy which obviously makes him unhappy so the solution is for him to kill the cat, right? It’s like that idea that a computer would solve world hunger by killing a huge chunk of the worlds population.

I made a point of bringing up the lack of ambiguity when it came to who was performing the murders in the original due to the way they outlined the voodoo plot and the older version of Andy eliminates that as a possibility here as well. But, they do add this level of manipulation in where people are questioning Andy’s sanity when he starts screaming about a killer doll, it’s cool how Chucky is able to use recordings and projecting images to TV screens and what not to taunt Andy and trick him into acting a certain way which is noticed by others.

Not that Andy is the brightest kid in the world to start with, it’s funny how his answer to everything is to just dump it in his apartment buildings trash chute. Killer doll murdered the family cat? Trash chute. Killer doll skinned my step-dad and left it as a present in my room? Trash chute. I deactivate said killer doll? Trash chute. People are going to look in that thing man! Bury that stuff, set it alight, pour some bleach on it...something!

I think the one thing was kind of a letdown for me in the movie was the voice of Chucky. It took until way near the end for me to remember that Mark Hamill was doing it and then I remembered how cool that sounded when it first came out, it puts all sorts of ideas in your head of Chucky having this Joker-esque voice but the performance never really stood out to me. With the original, Brad Dourif could really go over the top because he was actually speaking normally by the time that Chucky fully revealed himself and how capable of acting freely he was. I feel like this Chucky never really gets beyond just repeating back stock phrases or things he’s picked up from TV or other people.

Really enjoyed this one, it’s a neat way to modernise the concept and there’s a great mix of this ‘technology gone wrong’ angle and a more personal story of jealously and manipulation.

[shujins-voice]

▶🔘──────── 01:20:13

🎵🎶Opening musical jingle🎶🎵

🔊 [Risa]: Welcome listeners to Risa's Corner~! Today is April 24th 20XX, here for your weekly Sunday cast.

🔊 [Risa]: Let's talk the news, my dear listeners.

🔊 [Risa]: Here's our first story: It's been all over the news since the story broke this morning, but that cat killer case is really strange.

🔊 [Risa]: First, there's what the guy did--Ayaka Kimura, age [ ], taking stray cats and torturing them. He was found dead in his apartment after it was seemingly broken into with 20 disfigured and deceased cats around his body. He has a broken nose but the autopsy report couldn't figure out the cause of his death. "Cat Killer" was spray painted onto his door.

🔊 [Risa]: Not to run straight to speculation, but is it just me, or does this case resemble the Domino Cases? For new listeners, the Domino Cases are the recent slew of cases solved by Katsura Noriko--the name was created on this cast during one of our live shows, just for us to personally categorizes as we speculate and fact hunt ourselves.

🔊 [Risa]: The Domino Cases have only a few things in common among cases--they all have a sudden burst of psychotic breaks that result in the perpetrator to rampage but either die of an unknown cause or dispose of themselves. The autopsy reports always show no conclusive cause of death. The psychotic and nonsensical break in a person's psyche leads to death--kinda like dominoes, where one thing leads to the next.

🔊 [Risa]: Here at Risa's Corner, we've had a lot of speculation from poison to simple coincidence, but I was doing some research the other day about Tokyo cases 5 years plus ago, cuz you know, there can never be too much information about murder and crime, and stumbled upon the Mental Shutdown cases.

🔊 [Risa]: There were so many occurrences 5 years ago, and many news outlets covered it at the time, but what was called a "mental shutdown" suddenly stopped, so everyone assumed the culprit either died or was captured quietly by police. I'm not saying that the Mental Shutdown cases and the Domino Cases have the same perpetrator, nor that they are even *remotely* the same--the Mental Shutdown cases have different symptoms than the Domino Cases--but they do have something in common.

🔊 [Risa]: They happen to seemingly random people, at random times, for random reasons--and the person affected by them die for some undetermined reason. There's also the Psychotic Breakdown cases that some theorize to be attached, or at least somehow related to, the Mental Shutdown cases--and those were handled by the late detective Akechi Goro, so obviously this situation is more complicated and you can't compare them this easily, but it's weird right?

🔊 [Risa]: We'll have to wait on more conclusive evidence before drawing any conclusions, but even look at the recent case in Shjinjuku of the 24 year old man wielding a bat and attacking random people. After this spree of violence, where he critical injured two people, he suddenly died before police even got on the scene. His autopsy results showed nothing conclusive about what killed him.

🔊 [Risa]: Then there's the case with two college students ramming their car into a jewelry store and making off with money and rings, only to drop dead after running away from the police. Many of the Domino Cases are nonsensical, and the police are often playing catch up when they discovery the bodies after everything goes down.

🔊 [Risa]: Katsura-san has been a vital component to solving this recent outbreak of cases, and has gained a lot of attention for her contributions. You've probably seen her all over TV and in the paper.

🔊 [Risa]: Of course, there has been some criticism of Katsura-san, dismissing her as a trend or just another attention grabber. The label of "Detective Prince" has often been associated with her name as of late, but many detractors call her "Detective Prissy", demeaning her detective work and claiming she's trying to usurp the role other detective princes have filled despite having no talent and originating from a no name place.

🔊 [Risa]: I think this behavior from others is stupid and inane for several reasons: Katsura-san first garnered notoriety due to the Daigoku Corp case she solved when she was 14, but if you look at her personal track record of solved cases, you'll find she's worked harder than many detective currently employed by the police.

🔊 [Risa]: And so what if she does public interviews and TV appearance? Did anyone criticize and lambaste Akechi Goro for trying to appeal to the public? He had valid and strong push back against him, but it was for his opinion, and not in the way people currently treat Katsura-san

🔊 [Risa]: Now I'm not saying that someone who brags and preens their role as a fake detective is the same as the real deal, nor that Akechi-san or Katsura-san are levels above each other, or lesser than each other. It's TRUE that Katsura-san hasn't been as active as she was before she was discovered, but she hasn't stopped working.

🔊 [Risa]: Looping back to the TV appearance thing, hey interviewers? You know she's 17 right? You sure you want to creep on her like that and push her with invasive questions?

🔊 [Risa]: I have a recent article on my site you can read comparing and contrasting the types of questions asked to Akechi Goro in his prime, a male detective, and Katsura Noriko, a female detective. It's no secret or mystery why there's such a stark difference, but if you want to see just how rampant the disrespect towards females in this industry is, that post can give you a taste.

🔊 [Risa]: It's not just Katsura-san either--look at the recent rape accusations made by a local female journalist. The angle many outlets and media organisations have taken and framed this story is not only disgusting but demeaning. It's the same song and dance every time with victims of sexual assault--people victim shame and assume the journalist is accusing out of jealously or trying to tear someone of power down. That's literally not how it works!

🔊 [Risa]: There are people who falsely accuse people of assault, yes, but those are in the minority. Especially in Japan. In 2014 legislators revised a century-old rape law to include serious penalties, but the lengths prosecutors need to go in order to prove it in court hasn't changed.

🔊 [Risa]: You know what determines if a rape is a crime? If the woman tries to fight back. Not if she says "no", not if she can't consent. If she doesn't fight back, it's hard to prove in court, and going through the process of filing charges can be intense and hurtful for the victims.

🔊 [Risa]: Like always, women are treated differently in this country, and throughout the world. Below this cast I have some helpful links for you if you want to read more on this topic, along with my citations, since I know I've gotten pretty heated on this topic, but I do recommend you read further on this. Even if you don't agree with me, there's always something to learn, so educate yourself.

🔊 [Risa]: Ah, but with that depressing rant out of the way, let's move onto the lighter segment of our program, Risa's Recommendations!

🔊 [Risa]: Happy pride week! Here's a reminder that the Tokyo Pride festival is on the 28th and 29th of this week. The parade will start in Shibuya and lead into Harajuku on the 28th. Want to participate? There's a sign up sheet online for groups, or you can go to Yoyogi Park, where the festival will be held, to sign up for free in person.

🔊 [Risa]: Speaking of the festival, the Tokyo Rainbow Pride festival will have more companies sponsoring it than ever before! The festivities will continue into Golden Week, so if you're a busy student don't worry!

🔊 [Risa]: On the 26th there is the pudding festival near DiverCity, boasting over 100 variants of pudding from all across Japan, so it's perfect for anyone with a sweet tooth! I remember going last year and got my hands on some kind of melon flavoured pudding--ahhh that was so yummy~!

🔊 [Risa]: On the 24th, today, is the Hanazono Shrine Antique Market, an small but regular antique fair that has 25-30 stalls. The fair runs from sunrise to sunset, but you should keep in mind most stalls close around 3pm. If you're any kind of collector, you should pop by and see what wares are available!

🔊 [Risa]: And of course, if you're still in the festival mood, all over Tokyo are cherry blossom festivals! If I were to recommend one though, I'd say go for the one in Roppongi. I've heard great things from my friend about it, but I still need to drag him to go with me sometime!

🔊 [Risa]: And that's all the time we have for today! Thank you for listening and like I always say; stay keen, seen, and clean! Take care~

[xdemigodslytherinx]

Jealousy

Pairing: Eric x Reader

Prompt:Imagine being piicked to be on Eric’s team for capture the flag.When you’re shot,you overreact to the pain to mess with him.

Warnings:none

Requested by all-you-can-imagines

You hadn’t been with Eric long and you were both still learning to navigate the relationship,but there were some things you couldn’t let slide.One in particular being Eric’s idiotic need to start fights that most often resulted in bruises and cuts marring his skin.When you saw him come home to you with even worse injuries,you gently scolded him as you fussed over him.You hated to see him hurt and while you were knew it was inevitable at training,you wished he could better restrain himself.He of course never understood the annoyance it caused you when he got into these fights,stating it was ‘no different then training’.

It was getting rather annoying as of late and when coupled with his already raging jealously,most of the recruits were terrified to even glance in your direction.It made training rather difficult when everyone was scared to fight you in fear of Eric’s retaliation and while there were times when you found his possessiveness rather hot,that was not the case now.Today the two of you along with Four were going to be playing Capture the Flag and you hoped this would allow Eric to let out all that pent up aggression he had.The train ride to the playing field was rather awkward to say the least.You had attempted to start some small talk with Four only for you to be dragged away by a frowning Eric and Four by an annoyed Tris.

With a sigh,you glanced up at the frustrated face of Eric and placed a palm to his cheek to gain his attention.

“Sweetheart,you don’t need to be jealous of Four.You know I love you.”You reassured him,tilting his head toward you and placing a gentle kiss to his lips.

“You didn’t see the way he was looking at you.’He answered,glaring over your head at Four.

“I’m pretty sure,he has eyes only for Tris.”You replied with a roll of your eyes.

“Really?Tris?”

“Not really sure how you didn’t see that before,but yeah the two of them have been dancing around their attraction for a while now.”You let out a small laugh at the confusion dancing across his brow.”So,you have nothing to worry about.We are simply friends,nothing more.”

“I still don’t like how he looks at you.”He replied,wrapping his arms around your waist.

“You don’t like how anyone looks at me.”You laid your head gently on his chest,relishing in his familiar touch.

“That’s true.”He admitted,pressing a gentle kiss to the top of your head as he glared at anyone staring at the two of you.You both stayed wrapped in each other’s arms until it was time to get off.You waited beside Eric as the recruits were divided into teams and instructions were given for the newbies.Once the game had started and the gunfire was beginning to fill the air,your team split up to cover more area in order to defend your flag.You had managed to maneuver yourself closer to the other teams territory but were now pinned under heavy fire from the opposing team.

It was as you tried to retreat that you found yourself with a dart to the chest.You cried out at the sharp pain it was programmed to bring and slumped against a nearby container to wait it out. Your ears caught sound of Eric’s voice a few feet from yours and it was then you thought of the perfect revenge for his behavior as of late.Hearing his footsteps near,you let out another cry of pain and hissed through your teeth as though you were in agonizing pain.

“(Y/N)?Babe,are you okay?”Eric asked as he caught sight of your slumped form.

“No! I’m in a lot of pain of pain.”You hissed back angrily,clenching your teeth as you squeezed your eyes shut as though you were bracing against a wave of pain.

“Oh,god.These are not supposed to hurt you this much.”He answered,panicking as he watched you.His rifle was thrown beside you as he kneeled down in front of you and cupped your face in his hands.

“Well obviously not!”You bit back in reply,reaching up to grasp his hands in yours.

“Um,i’m going to remove it from your vest.Maybe,that’s doing it.”He answered,beginning to look a bit out of character with his franticness when compared to his usual calm and collected attitude.You peeked open an eye to look at him and couldn’t help the giggle that left your mouth and the clear panic on his face.

“What?”He asked in confusion at your laugh.

“You are adorable looking when you get so worked up like this.”You answered with a smile,relaxing your tense muscles and sitting up.

“What?”He reiterated,seemingly more confused and suspicious.

“I was just messing with you sweetheart.The pains faded already and i’m fine.”You assured him,taking his hands in yours.

“Why would you do that to me!? I was worried sick!”He asked,glaring at you.

“Now you know how I feel when you come home from those fights.”You answered,giving him your own glare.

“Is that what this is about?”He asked with a scoff.

“Yes that’s what this is about! You remember that fear and worry you felt a minute ago?Yeah,i feel that all the time when you come home battered and bruised all the time!It’s terrifying to know you’re hurt and not being able to do a damn thing about it.I figured you could do with a taste of your own medicine.”You answered angrily.

His glare softened at your words and he let out a heavy sigh as his eyes locked with yours.”I’m sorry I put you through that.I never imagined it would effect you like that.I was getting into more fights because this was the first year we were together with new recruits and I was a little...jealous.I’m sorry for overreacting.”

“I accept your apology,but please promise me you won’t keep getting into fights.”You asked,cupping his cheek in your hand as your eyes pleaded with him.

He knawed on his bottom lip for a few moments before releasing another sigh and nodding his head.”I promise.”

“Thank you!”You leaned forward and captured his lips in a passionate kiss.The familiar sparks were there as the two of you kissed and you happily let his tongue glide against your own.When he suddenly pulled away,you let out a small whine at the loss of contact.

“You have to promise me,you won’t ever pull something like that again.”

“I promise.Now get back over here and kiss me.”

[doyoudrew]

How To Pull A Nancy Drew

By someone who hasn’t done it yet.... but this is my life’s work.

It’s under the cut because it’s really fucking long.

Step 1A: the most important step: realize taking the traditional route isn’t making you happy.

         You can’t be Nancy if you want stability or want to go on to grad/professional school or if you are excited about your new job and want to jump right into it—it won’t be good for you. I’m doing my post-grad-family-disappointment-vagabond-journey because I hate school and I’m so burnt out I haven’t gone to a full week of class at all this semester. This is the right choice for me, and I know this because I’ve been traveling while I’m in school and realize it’s when I’m happiest. If this isn’t true for you, don’t do something like not accept your grad school offer or turn down a grown-up job. What I’m saying is: don’t do anything you’re going to regret. Pulling a Nancy Drew is still kind of a commitment. It’s one you can get out of pretty easily, but you might have to wait a while to get into the next stage of your life.

The entire point of doing this is to make yourself happy. Only take trips or internships or jobs that make you happy. Don’t do it if it’s going to make you unhappy.

 Step 1B: Finish your semester/year/graduate.

         This is important. Don’t just drop out of school. If you can hold out until you actually graduate, do it: then you’ll have your degree for when you decide to stop being a figurative leaf in the wind, and you can use it to get a real job. Also, some of volunternships require a 4-year degree, and they are one way to start doing what Nancy does. And, if you’d prefer real office work, you have to either be in college or have recently graduated to get traditional internships.

 Step 2: Get a job.

         If you’re still in college, only do this if you can work while you’re in school. If you’re out, then no offense, but you should’ve been doing something already.

         The job you get is going to be crappy and not pay very well, but it is going to pay, and it’s going to be one that lets you take time off easily. I’m a server. I make pretty decent money because, not to brag, but I’m pretty good at it. I don’t have a limit on how much time I’m allowed to take off and if I feel like I’m not making enough I can pick up more shifts. More importantly, I like my job and I like everyone I work with. If you hate yours or you’re bad at it, find a new job. I realize that might sound a little “trickle-down economics”… my point is: just make sure you’re working and you don’t hate it. All of this is a personal thing, so do what works best for you. When I was in high school I worked at Zaxby’s to support my travel habit. One of my close friends was a lifeguard. It doesn’t matter what it is, as long as you don’t want to rip your face off when you walk into work and they let you take time off to travel.

 Step 3: Stop buying stuff.

         If you start reading this Step 3 and thenthink, “I already don’t buy stuff, this is really condescending, I still don’t have any money” then just skip it. My feelings won’t be hurt.

         “Stop buying stuff? Easier said than done” you might say. I don’t.

         You have to pay your rent, or for car repairs, or for your prescriptions, or for a new pair of contacts. I get that. You have to buy food, too. That’s not “stuff”. Those are necessities.

         “Stuff” is like, a thirtieth skincare product that still smells weird and still doesn’t make you look like Jennifer Aniston. “Stuff” is, for me, a millionth pair of lacy underwear to shove in the overflowing drawer. More craft supplies that I don’t use. Another freaking mug when I have so many I can’t close my cabinet. If you can figure out what Minette means by “stuff”, you can figure out what “stuff” means for you. Maybe it’s socks or razors or DVDs. Figure it out and stop buying it.

         I get it, stuff is pretty, and buying it feels nice and can occasionally work to prove to yourself that you’re an adult on a day you really need convincing. But it’s a temporary high! I can’t help you combat impulse buys (I still deal with it myself. I’m writing this and thinking of the 8—yes eight­—candles I bought from Family Dollar yesterday for no reason other than ~aesthetic~ when I read at night, because I’m a hypocrite and a whore) but I can help you find cheaper shit. Use discount cards, buy things when there’s a sale, go to secondhand stores for books and clothes and furniture, when you get new clothes make sure you can wear them in more than one outfit.

         I realize you probably already know all of these things. Stop Buying Stuff is probably one of the harder things to master, but you can do it. Do it in your own way. Or if you can’t, read one of the millions of Pinterest articles written by blog moms about saving money. I had to stop writing this step because I started sounding like them, which I never want to do.

TL;DR: A lot of times it feels like what I’m buying is a necessity, but it isn’t. Just be aware of what you’re buying, and don’t get it if it isn’t going to change your life.

 Step 4: Where you gonna live while you’re being a bum?

         At this moment in time, I live by myself in a sweet-ass apartment. I only have one very quiet neighbor, I use piles of books as furniture and my bedroom consists of a mattress on the floor, one lonely dresser, and a milk-crate as a bedside table. I love living by myself. But after I graduate, when the loan that I use for my housing runs out, am I gonna be able to stay here? Maybe not.

         The reasons I probably won’t be able to stay in my apartment after August, when my lease runs out: my heating bill in the winter is insane and I won’t be able to afford it. I would be paying rent on a place I’ll be away from for weeks or months. I’ll have to repay the aforementioned loan, on top of making travel arrangements. If this sounds like you, you might have to make the hard decision to leave your home sweet apartment too.

Option one: move back home. I’m lucky enough to have a good enough relationship with my family, and for my dad to have a house big enough, for me to move in with him later if I want to. It would be the cheapest option, and I know I would get along with my roommates (i.e., my dad and my dog). Living with your parents isn’t sexy, but if your life is going to look like a cycle of working nonstop for a month and then leaving the country for a few, it’s the most pragmatic. Also, Nancy Drew still lives at home, and that’s really what this is all about.

         Option two is to find some roommates. Living with someone means you still have rent and utilities to pay, but it’s much cheaper than living on your own, and you know someone will be at your house while you’re off gallivanting around the world. Make sure you like your roommates: I have had terrible experience with roommates and at this given moment, there is only one person I would actually consider moving in with—and it would cut down on my living expenses.

         Of course, there are other fluke options that you personally might have. If they sound good, take them. Remember, this entire thing is just guidelines, about how I’m going to pull a Nancy—if you want to do this too, do it your own way!

         Also, very importantly, your living arrangements depend on what kind of traveling you’re going to do. Want to teach English in Japan? Great, but that’ll probably last six months to a year. Want to take a road trip out West? Cool, is it a two week road trip or a month-long one? Maybe you just want to live at the beach or in a state park for a week. Do it. If you want to backpack New Zealand you could do it in two weeks, but that plane ticket is going to be hella expensive, and you need to make sure your bills are covered while you’re being a world traveler.

 Step 5: The best step: Start planning your trips.

         This, obviously, is completely up to you. If you do want to do things exactly like Nancy does, you’ll probably take a lot of internships. For the record, the way she lives her life is completely unrealistic, because she has absolutely no experience or direction and yet they just appear for her, and I’m jealously annoyed by that.

         Trips vary in length and expenses. I recommend picking one and sticking with it. I also heavily advocate doing something like, having a work-travel-work cycle—basically you just come home to work. That’s my plan, anyway. Also, don’t forget that there’s probably cool things to do near your hometown, and you can do those things while you’re there.

         If you’re afraid your degree is worthless without grad school, fear not! I’m here to tell you it isn’t. I feel confident telling you that because my degree is in anthropology, the mother of all useless degrees, and yet I have never been afraid about finding a job. When I realized I didn’t want to go to med school, I honestly just typed “anthropology degree jobs” into the indeed.com search bar and a million different jobs came up. Do that with your degree and I’m sure you’ll find a bunch of things to do with it. Also, there are several entry-level jobs that just require a degree—any degree. Indeed and Monster are also decent ways to find internships, if you’re looking for them. Anyway:

 Traditional Internship finders:

http://www.internshipfinder.com/

https://www.looksharp.com/s/summer-internships

http://www.internships.com/

http://www.idealist.org/ ß for nonprofit/humanitarian/volunteer-esque types of internships or real jobs. This one is actually a site I use a lot.

(if these don’t make you happy, use google)

 Short, fun, pay-your-own-way Volunteer trips:

http://www.himalayanhealth.com/ (India; I did this in the summer of 2014 and loved it, it’s an awesome program and you learn a lot while you’re there working in public health camps)

http://www.habitat.org/volunteer/long-term-opportunities/international (habitat for Humanity abroad--this is not a short trip, be warned)

https://www.volunteerforever.com/article_post/2016-best-volunteer-abroad-programs-organizations-projects (to help you decide because I don’t want to read 900 articles for this one blog post)

 Et Cetera:

https://www.internationalteflacademy.com/blog/bid/51364/top-5-countries-to-make-the-most-money-teaching-english-overseas (about teaching English overseas a la Shadow at the Water’s Edge; there are several programs for this so… do your research)

http://wwoof.net/ (volunteering on farms in almost every country; a family friend did this and now speaks fluent Italian. there is an incredibly strong possibility that I will go WWOOFing in the near future)

https://www.peacecorps.gov/ (can’t forget the peace corps exists)

https://www.nationalservice.gov/programs/americorps (the peace corps’ domestic sibling, if you want to volunteer but want to stay in the states)

 There are plenty of other very cool programs for pretty much anywhere you want to go. Pick a place and then use your google (that’s basically how I plan my trips).

ALSO, you can take trips just to take trips. This is generally what I personally do, except for the times I took study abroad trips in college. I’m also very about traveling domestically—these are generally cheaper trips and there’s a lot of cool stuff to see in the US. If you already have a road trip buddy, hold on to them tight.

If you’re a road tripper, you should look at how to turn your car into a camper. It can be done with almost any car (except, like, a miata, obviously). I have a pathfinder and I’m going to convert it and just leave it that way so that I can go camping at the drop of a hat—but the conversions are really simple and if you just want to convert it for a trip and then put it back , you can.

 Other parting thoughts:

·        If you can supplement your income by doing something creative, selling stuff, doing any type of freelancing, etc: do it.

·        Paying for parking is for chumps.

·        You don’t need to own more than one pair of sweatpants.

·        Nancy always sounds really put together, but the reality of being a travel bum is that you’re going to be a grungy person for a while. It’s fine, because the people around you are also grungy, and really all of you are just there to have a good time.

·        I cannot stress how much you don’t need a closetful of clothes.

·        When packing for anything, try to be able to fit it all into a carry-on size bag. Checking bags is also for chumps.

·        Get and use good soft-sided luggage, like a duffle or a frame-pack. Suitcases are real cutesy but they end up taking up a lot of space and are hard to navigate with.

·        As much as I just rambled about not spending money, there are some things you should splurge for. These are: good quality versatile shoes (I love Chacos, personally), good luggage, a reusable water bottle and/or travel mug that’s going to last you, a portable charger for when there are no outlets, et cetera. But if you spend money on these things, you can’t spend money on stuff, because you’ll run out of money. Ps—you can find decent luggage at a thrift store. I bought a Kelty frame pack at a flea marker for $12. It doesn’t have to be expensive to be good.

·        If you’re a road tripper and love camping, look into getting a pass for all the state parks in your state. If you like other things, like amusement parks, look into getting a season pass (the Carowinds family of amusement parks goes all the way up the East Coast, for instance, and there’s some kind of season pass you can get that lets you into all of them).

 That’s all I have for right now. I’m sorry it took so long for me to make this (and that it’s such a long post) but I’m glad I finally did it! Feel free to message me for anything, especially if you have questions. I’m not sure if this is as clear as I want it to be, but here’s to hoping.

[cigarshaven52-blog]

Blogging Programs Are BEST for Health Connected Sites

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