#obviously subby!bratty!bottom house still rules my heart BUT

[bougiebutchbitch]

........okay okay okay hear me out

in House’s Head, House realizes he would rather fantasize about diagnosing symptoms than sex

and there’s obviously a bit of self-loathing involved (”How messed up is that?”, his subconscious asks grumpily, in the voice of one tragically un-naked Lisa Cuddy)

he is CONSTANTLY overcompensating and cracking sex jokes to literally anyone who moves in his vicinity

but I think in 4 long seasons he’s been shown having actual hook ups... twice. Once with his ex-girlfriend, once with a random hooker. He likes to sabotage his own potential relationships before they ever reach a physical stage - pretty much every time he shows genuine interest in someone, by the end of that episode or the next he’s pushed them away for whatever obscure reason. And it’s supposed to show his fears of being emotionally vulnerable, but it also means he never really gets physically vulnerable, either. Which - yeah, could be interesting to poke at with regards to his identity as a disabled man, but I also raise you....

ACE HOUSE?????? ACE HOUSE HEADCANONS???????????? I COULD MAKE THIS WORK