#obviously not referring to current events exactly but I was looking forward to at least taking a breath for one fucking second

[prizefigures]

If one of my exes who was really into new age spirituality has been putting curses on me or something could you fucking cut it out I get it already

[itsclydebitches]

Hi! I was just watching good omens and I came up with some questions, but I didn't know whom to ask, so I was digging around for go analysis blogs and found you. *takes a breath* So, I was wondering if you had any thoughts on why Heaven's camera angles are the way they are. I noticed that, in heaven, the camera tends to focus on the characters' heads specifically, so they fill most of the screen. Either it's a meta reason or a reference to something (like Newt with the Office) that I'm not getting. That's the main thing, but I've also wondered why exactly Aziraphale uses the verb "fraternize" in the 19th century. It seemed an odd pivot from caring about Crowley's safety to Heaven's rules. Thanks so much!

Hello! Omg yes, let's talk Good Omens cinematography.

First, the obligatory Analysis Disclaimer: I doubt there's a specific interpretation that you're just not getting, some singular, "correct" reading of the scene(s). Two years past release, I'm positive the fandom as a whole has come up with plenty of ideas (I mostly hang on the periphery. I'm far from up to date with GO meta), but any and all of it will, by nature, be subjective. Thus, all I can offer is my own, personal interpretation.

So for me? It's about intimacy.

Not intimacy in the sense of friendship, but rather the broad idea of closeness. Confidentiality. Emotion. Knowledge. Understanding by means of literally getting into the thick of these conversations. I love the camerawork in Heaven (and elsewhere) because the camera itself acts like a person — an additional party to these interactions. And, since we're the ones watching this show via the camera, it makes it feel as if we're peeking into scenes that are otherwise private. Obviously all cinematography does this to a certain extent, the camera is always watching someone or something without acknowledging that we're doing the watching (outside of documentary-esque filmmaking), but GO uses angles and closeups to mimic another person observing these scenes, someone other than the characters involved.

The easiest example I can give here is when Michael makes their call to Ligur. Here, the camera is positioned up on the next landing of the staircase, as if we're sneaking a look down at this otherwise secret call. There's even a moment when the camera pans to the right to look at them through the gap in the railing, briefly obscuring Michael from our view.

Here, a standard expectation of any scene — keep your character in focus — is done away with to instead mimic the movements of someone actually hiding in the stairwell, listening in on the conversation. It creates that feeling of intimacy, as if we're really there with Michael, not just watching Michael through a screen. The camerawork acts like a person overhearing an illicit conversation prior to falling back on mid/closeup shots. We're spying on them.

To give a non-Heaven example, the camera helps us connect with Aziraphale during Gabriel's jogging scene. It's hard to show through screenshots, but if you re-watch you'll see that the camera initially keeps them both in the frame with full body shots, allowing us to compare things like Gabriel's unadorned gray workout clothes with Aziraphale's more stylish outfit; one's good jogging form and the other's awkward shuffle. However, this distance also creates the sense that we're jogging with them, we're keeping pace.

That is, until Aziraphale begins to lag. Then the camera lags too, giving them both the chance to catch up, so to speak.

Until, finally, Aziraphale has to stop completely and the camera, of course, stops with him. We're emotionally attuned to Aziraphale, not Gabriel, and the camerawork reflects that. Even more-so when we cut to a low shot of Gabriel's annoyed huff at having to stop at all, making him appear larger and more imposing. Because to Aziraphale, he is.

This work carries over into Heaven's other scenes. The closeups are pretty much a given since, whether it's Gabriel realizing Aziraphale has been "fraternizing" with Crowley (more on that below!), or Aziraphale choosing to go back to Earth, the scenes in Heaven are incredibly important to the narrative. Closeups allow the viewer to get a good read on each character's emotional state — focusing on minute facial changes as opposed to overall body language — and that fly-on-the-wall feeling is increased as we literally get an up close and personal look at these pivotal moments.

Compare a shot like this one of Gabriel to the line of angels ready for battle. We don't get closeups on any of their faces because their emotions aren't important. Yes, that's in part because they're background characters, not main characters, but a lack of emotion — their willingness to enter this war without question — is also the point of their presence in this scene. So they remain a semi-identical, nearly faceless mass that runs off into infinity down that hallway, not any individual whose inner life we get a peek at via a closeup.

I particularly like Aziraphale's conversation with the angel... general? Idk what to call this guy. He's just gonna be Mustache Angel. But, getting back on track, his scene has a lot of over the shoulder shots which, admittedly, are pretty common. From a practical perspective they're used to help the audience situate both characters in the scene — you're here, you're there, this is how you're spaced during this conversation — but it can also help emphasize that closeness between them. Keeping both characters in the shot connects them and though Aziraphale and Mustache Angel definitely aren't on the same page here, those shots help cue us in to the unwanted intimacy of this moment. They're both angels... even though Aziraphale no longer aligns himself with them. They're both soldiers in a war... but Aziraphale will not fight. This angel has a list of Aziraphale's secrets, including that he once had a flaming sword and lost it... but Aziraphale doesn't want to admit those circumstances to him. This angel wouldn't understand, even if he did. Intimacy here, connection and closeness, is something discomforting because Aziraphale can no longer embrace those similarities. They put him (and us) out of sorts, so when we get them both in frame, that connection creates tension, not relief.

And many of those over the shoulder shots are given sharp angels, or the camera is placed too close to the "off screen" party. Compare a shot like Luke and Rey to Aziraphale and Mustache Angel. Here, Luke is a clean, solid line on the left side of the screen, just enough there to cue us in to where he is in relationship to Ray, In contrast, Mustache Angel's mustache is Too Close and proves rather distracting. Rey and Luke are connecting here over being Jedi with responsibilities to uphold (or at least, Luke will acknowledge that connection later lol); Mustache Angel is forcing a connection with Aziraphale that makes everyone uncomfortable.

We are too close to him here. He feels too close to Aziraphale too. This whole conversation is upsetting and discomforting, pushing Aziraphale to finally choose which side he's on (his own with Crowley). The shots aren't meant to subtly keep the audience from getting lost and then otherwise be unobtrusive, we're supposed to be Very Aware of this angel's body and how close he's getting to the character we've come to identify with — both literally (he's leaning in) and in terms of forcing Aziraphale to finally make his choice.

When Mustache Angel marches forward and gets all up in Aziraphale's face, the camera positions itself behind Aziraphale in a way that makes it feel like we're hiding behind him, with Aziraphale taking up far more of the screen than Luke does. Like the scene with Michael or running with Gabriel, the camera often likes to mimic a "realistic" response to these events. This angry, shouty angel is getting closer, best take a step back and stay out of sight behind Aziraphale, holding his ground.

These closeups also serve as a nice contrast to the wide and longshots we get of Heaven. It's an imposing place with skyscrapers in the distance, lots of steel, immaculate floors, and endless white. It's overwhelming and it's cold. But then we cut to those mid-shots of Gabriel and Michael, telling us that they're in control of it all.

Aziraphale? Aziraphale is not in control. Not now, anyway. When he appears in Heaven we get a longshot to show off this endless void and he's just another, tiny speck in it. If he weren't flailing around — an acting move that likewise helps sell how out of his depth he is — it's unlikely you'd even notice him. Aziraphale's clothing and hair blends in perfectly with the background. He's forgettable. Easily overlooked. Someone to underestimate. And when he moves, he has to come to the camera. We don't cut to Aziraphale to establish control like we do with Gabriel. He's left to awkwardly shuffle up to Mustache Angel until he's finally come into view.

Yet when Aziraphale makes his decision, he aligns himself with the brightest, most colorful, most interesting thing in the room: Earth. Earth, with all its messy individuality, is the antithesis to Heaven's controlled uniformity and a bright blue orb hanging in the midst of all this white helps remind us of that. Aziraphale rejects becoming one of the identical soldiers and instead literally reaches out for the one thing in Heaven that doesn't fit in.

When he leaves, we get an extreme closeup for the first time. Mustache Angel is pissed and as such we not only get a good look at his face in the aftermath of Aziraphale's choice, but that extreme closeup on his mouth as he's shouting too. It's like he's shouting directly at us, the viewer who is currently cheering on Aziraphale's decision. There's a war, dammit... but we don't care. Not in the way he cares, anyway.

So there's a lot! And I could probably go on, but apparently I'm only allowed to add 10 images per post now (tumblr what the actual fuck if anyone knows a way around this please share!) and I've already had to merge a bunch of images like an animal. So let's awkwardly finish up with the duck pond scene.

...without a GIF because they apparently count as images too 🙃

Simply put, I don't think Aziraphale bringing up fraternizing is a pivot from one to the other — from caring about Crowley to caring about Heaven's rules. I mean yes, Aziraphale is lagging behind Crowley in terms of rebellion and a part of him is, at this point, absolutely concerned with how he'll come across to the higherups, but that worry doesn't stem solely from a (now very shaky) desire to obey for the sake of obeying. The thing is, Aziraphale's disobedience is, by default, also Crowley's disobedience. If they're friends and they're ever found out, they'll both get in trouble. Which, we know from the end of Season One, basically means being wiped from existence. That's horrifying! And it's a horror that threatens them both. I don't think Aziraphale cares about rules for the sake of rules; after all, he started off by giving away his sword, lying to God, is currently meeting with Crowley anyway... this angel has always ignored/bent the rules — established and implied — that don't suit him. Rather, he cares about the rules if he thinks they have a chance of being enforced. If there will be consequences for breaking and bending them. This is still about caring for Crowley (as well as saving his own, angelic skin). If they're found out, Crowley dies. And, as we the viewer learn, Heaven was indeed observing them that whole time. There was always legitimate risk attached to this relationship. Aziraphale's fear, hesitance, and at times forceful pleas to stop this stem as much from Aziraphale worrying about Crowley's safety as they do a learned instinct to obey the rules without question. He pushes to end the relationship because the relationship threatens the only thing Aziraphale cares about more than that: Crowley himself.

As for the term "fraternizing," that's a loaded one! I won't go into a whole history lesson here, but suffice to say it has military roots: to sympathize as brothers with an opponent. That is literally what Crowley and Aziraphale are doing. They are an angel and a demon, supposedly innate enemies, supposedly poised for an inevitable war... yet they've formed an incredibly strong kinship. They've both learned to love their enemy, the thing every army fears because, well, then your army won't fight (just as Aziraphale won't). However, beyond the enemy implications, "to fraternize" eventually took on a sexual meaning: to not merely love as a brother, but to lay with the enemy too, usually women from enemy countries (because, you know, heteronormativity). Nowadays, "to fraternize" often implies a sexual component. I've been rewatching The Good Wife lately and in one subplot, the State's Attorney cracks down on fraternization in his office. He doesn't mean his employees are forming bonds with assumed enemies, he means his employees are having sex on his office couch. So Aziraphale's phrasing here carries a LOT of weight. He's both reminding Crowley of their stations in the world — you are a demon, I am an angel, us meeting like this can have formal, irrevocable consequences for us both — as well as, given the fact that this is a love story, drawing attention to the depth of this relationship. They love one another, as more than just friends. Though whether Crowley's scathing "Fraternizing?" is a response to Aziraphale falling back on the technicalities of their positions, or acknowledging a love he's yet to overtly admit and commit to — or both! — is definitely up for debate.

[nikkiwriteswords]

Hi! I would love to hear your thoughts/predictions/hopes for s3, now that we got the episode titles :D

Hey Nora!! Let me go grab my tua theory hat real quick. Spoiler alert, it looks exactly like the umbrella hat on the 3 right here:

Full disclosure, I've only got like a pinky toe in the tua fandom right now, but I'm still going to see what BS I can spin from these titles.

1. MEET THE FAMILY. The description on imdb is "The siblings get to know some more of the 43 children in an alternate timeline." So, I think this is pretty self-explanatory. Netflix likes to start things off with a bang, so s3 of TUA will probably be no different: we'll probably get a vague flashforward/flash-sideways to a "what if" scenario that will make sense by the last few episodes, and the rest of the episode will be sowing seeds for the s3 plot. The big question is, what family are we meeting? I think this episode will revolve around themes of family (no-brainer) and redefining the relationships between our Umbrella siblings in light of the season 2 finale, as well as their new Sparrow 'replacements'. To that end, initial Sparrow sibling parallels will be presented and subsequently complicated in this first episode. I also predict we'll see varying reactions to this alternate Reginald, as the Umbrella siblings are thrust into an outsider perspective that follows on from season 2.

2. WORLD'S BIGGEST BALL OF TWINE. This is going to be a multi-layered metaphor. I can feel it. It will no doubt refer to the plot that's about to unfold (is it an outside threat to both parties - the Umbrellas and Sparrows - from, say, the Commission, or is it more to do with the two rival Academies?), but I wonder if it also refers to the Wizard of Oz type scenario the Umbrella siblings find themselves in: they aren’t in Kansas anymore. (But you know what is in Kansas? The world's current biggest ball of twine.) Also kind of want to see Klaus knitting again in this ep - perhaps as a way to subtly re-address his ongoing addiction issues, especially now Ben is gone.

3. POCKET FULL OF LIGHTNING. This probably has to do with powers. Sparrow powers, Umbrella powers. There'll be a lot of new flexes in this season, so who this refers to is anyone's guess.

4. KUGELBLITZ. Here's where it starts to get interesting, because this title carries forward the subject of lightning from the last one. According to a very quick internet search, kugelblitz literally means "ball lightning" in German, and refers to both a) a glorified WW2 tank designed to take out aircraft (a certified Big Boi), and b) a theoretical black hole made from light/radiation rather than matter. So this is absolutely going to be a new, unseen power - probably from the Sparrows. Hopefully from Christopher because a cube executing a move named after a sphere just makes me chuckle. Ah, fun with shapes... But in addition, this power is probably going to pack a huge, debilitating punch to whatever narrative is underway at this point in the plot. I'll bet money that whoever wields this power is the tank character in their party or they are after this at least.

5. KINDEST CUT. This throws me back to the barber shop meta, I'm not gunna lie. Someone's going to get hurt, either physically or emotionally, and it's going to be the lesser of two evils. If it's a follow through on the barber metaphor, then Reggie will be the one to orchestrate it. Or, in a surprise twist, will he be the one gTetting hurt or being silenced? (Remember that cutthroat allegory that chases the siblings through the first season, particularly Allison and Klaus. It was about becoming voiceless.) 6.MARIGOLD. Big shout out to this post for spreading the word on the marigold symbolism. I'm pretty sure this will be Reginald backstory, which ties in with the creation of the Umbrella Academy. Also, because I'm a sucker for flower symbolism and reading into things, consider that marigolds:

a) fall into two families, the calendula which means "little clock" and the tagetes, which is named after the Etruscan prophet Tages. The Etruscans believed heavily in predestination - some events are set in stone, and cannot be changed. (Consider the way the apocalypse seems to always come for one set of siblings...) b) are named as such colloquially because they were offered in place of money to the Virgin Mary. (More divine imagery, and reference to a pure mother figure...) They are Mary’s gold. So maybe it’s a reference to Reginald’s wife, which would fit with the flashback scene we see in 1x10.  c) are a flower of duality. They have strong connections with the sun and resurrection, yet the marigold is thought to be a flower of grief because it blooms in autumn. Again, think about that flashback in the first season. At the end of the world and a wife dying, there was the promise of rebirth. d) It's also a very common flower. Remember, there's actually 43 siblings out there. We've only met 14.

Also Netflix loves to do this thing around the halfway point (usually episode 5/6) in a season they're producing. They'll switch up the narrative with a twist or turn that provides a new perspective. 7.AUF WEIDERSEHEN. Once again, a German connection. And, obviously, a goodbye. Considering the last season focused on Kennedy, are we going to get some earlier Cold War time-travel shenanigans? Or maybe WW2? I think Blackman has said something about the Berlin Wall, which is interesting. A country divided... Umbrellas and Sparrows allegory? But as an aside, I'm also kinda lowkey hoping it's a nod to Auf Weidersehen, Pet. If you don't know the show, here's the wiki summary for the first season:

Auf Wiedersehen, Pet is a British comedy-drama television programme about seven British construction workers who leave the United Kingdom to search for employment overseas. They find work on a German building site in Düsseldorf but despite promises of hostel accommodation, are forced to live in a small hut that reminds them of a World War II POW camp. The rest of the series is driven by the interactions and growing friendships between the various characters.

In episode seven, three of the “Magnificent Seven” visit an intercontinental hotel. Just saying. If s3 was to go this route, my money would be on Luther, Diego and Five getting up to shenanigans in this one. I miss 125 shenanigans.😢

8.WEDDING AT THE END OF THE WORLD. Honestly, I’m holding out hope that one of our fave siblings gets married. I feel like that’s a trap though... Actually I feel like it might actually be a trap. As in, this is when the rising action really kicks it up a notch. But also remember the title of 1x01: We Only See Each Other At Weddings and Funerals. Maybe the siblings get split up, possibly in episode 3/4, and they’re trying to reunite through episodes 5-7. Also thinking about hotels and apocalypses...  There’s something very fatalistic about these titles so far. I have a feeling that the B-plot or the subtext is going to reveal a lot more about Reginald’s history and the destruction of his world.

9. SIX BELLS. This makes me think of church bells, which is some nice continuity with the wedding of the last title. But church bells are rung for all sorts of reasons - as a call to worship, or in celebration or mourning, or to tell the time. (Thinking back to those marigolds suddenly.) But why six? Now I’m thinking of bell ringing (change ringing), and the way different bells have different cord lengths to control the time of their chimes. It’s a highly mathematical process. Will this episode be Five’s time to shine? Will he coordinate his siblings through a large attack? 10. OBLIVION. Does anything even need to be said about this one? Hotel Oblivion baby ✌✌ Any further theorising would require more knowledge of the coming plot tbh.

Edit: I wrote most of this at 2am, so I’ve just tidied it up a little. Thank you for the ask, Nora! This was fun to think about. 

[arhvste]

irreplaceable - oikawa tooru

summary - you and oikawa have been broken up for a couple of years but managed to maintain a close and friendly relationship with each other however, it proves to be too much of a challenge for you two to keep your relationship purely platonic. - fluff

an- this was requested on my wattpad i’ll tag the user when i find it, also i have no idea what the hell is going on with the spaces between paragraphs i can’t fix it google docs obviously hates me but i’ll put up with it for now.

warnings - cursing (minimal)

“Hey I think we should break up. It’s for the best right now.”

-

It had been 3 years since you and the famous Oikawa Tooru had decided to part ways. There was no bitterness behind the decision to end your romance, it was just like Oikawa had said, “for the best right now.”. You two had remained close friends despite your relationship status returning back to single, there was no reason to be unfriendly and throw away what you had so carefully and lovingly built up over the past 2 years with each other. Your schedules disagreed with each other and time spent together had slowly but surely decreased leading you both to mutually decide on putting a halt on your romance to prevent the feeling of neglect on either side.

You truly were happy for Oikawa and everything he was achieving and still were just as close to him as you were before, the only difference being you two weren’t exactly physically affectionate anymore. Not that you minded a huge amount but part of you did hang on to the last two words of his break up line.

“Right now.”

Before, you had secretly hoped to naturally rekindle your romance and pick up from where you left off as time went on and your schedules changed but it never happened. Not sure on Oikawa’s thoughts and feelings about the situation, you had decided it was best to move on and you did your best to do that, managing to convince yourself you were over the setter. Deep down you knew you still had lingering feelings for the boy but they were enough to handle and had gotten exceptionally easier to control and ignore when you were around your ex. You were almost certain that those lingering feelings had eventually faded but you always knew the boy would have some sort of place in your heart as your first serious love and you were fine with accepting that.

Whatever Oikawa was feeling about you, it didn’t matter as much to you as it did before. He was happy to be working towards his goals as a professional volleyball player and you couldn't be more proud of him.

Things were fine the way they were. You were still good friends and still hung out together as you did before. Both happy and content with the events occurring in your own lives while still being able to offer support and a platonic type of affection. Things were okay as they were and you were both okay with that.

-

The door slammed open startling you from the couch causing you to snap your head up and in the direction of the front door to your apartment. Your gaze met an irritated looking Oikawa who was currently dripping wet from the rain. Little droplets of water fell from his pretty brown locks which had stuck to his face agitating him further and his soaked clothes that would definitely need throwing in the dryer immediately.

“Bad weather?” you hummed teasingly as you swung your legs off the couch and made your way over to the soaking volleyball player.

“No, the sun is shining, temperature absolutely sweltering as you can tell by my excessive sweat.” he sarcastically quipped back, taking off his puddle filled shoes as close to your front door as he could.

Even after your break up, the two of you would still frequently visit each other's apartments whenever you wanted. Though you weren’t exactly romantically affectionate anymore, you both still found comfort in each other’s presence and the pair of you would visit each other when one of you needed to vent something out or you just felt like a general catch up between your busy and cruel schedules.

You threw Oikawa a warm towel that had just come out of your dryer. He caught it sharply and brought the warm and soft material to his face savouring not only the comforting warmth it brought to his cold skin, but also the relaxing scent of you. Oikawa would never admit out loud but, the scent of you was so familiar to him it almost gave him a sense of home. His pride wouldn't allow him to ever admit to something so sappy out loud to you, at least not for now.

“Go on, you know where everything is, go take a shower and leave your clothes in the basket outside. I’ll throw them in the dryer and make us some tea.” You smiled warmly at him as you made your way past him into the small but clean and sleek kitchen area to fill the kettle with fresh water.

“Thanks Y/N-chan. You’re the best!”

“We can’t have one of Japan’s top rising volleyball stars catching a cold can we? Now when you make it big, you’ll have me to thank because I kept you in good health.”

Oikawa snickered slightly before making his way to the bathroom down the hall in your apartment.

It wasn’t rare for the boy to visit you after training. Sometimes he needed a little extra support or words of encouragement particularly after training sessions he found more challenging or tiring than usual. You were a good listener who gave honest and unbiased feedback and that was something Oikawa could greatly appreciate you for.

After you heard the bathroom door click shut you approached the washing basket and grabbed his sopping wet clothes and threw them into the dryer in the small utility area. Turning it on a quick dry you set the basket back down and made your way back to the kitchen to finish serving the hot tea.

Grabbing two mugs, you carefully poured the hot liquid into them and carried them over to the small coffee table which sat in front of your couch. You went back to the kitchen to grab two plates and a loaf of milk bread you had made earlier. Oikawa had taught you how to make milk bread and you made sure to have some made as much as possible just in case he ever decided to drop by. Your cooking and baking skills didn’t go unnoticed by the setter who decided that “Y/N-chan’s milk bread is the best.”. You smiled to yourself fondly remembering the time he announced that after trying a piece of your first attempt of the recipe.

You heard shuffling noises from the bathroom and after a couple of minutes you heard the bathroom door open. Oikawa made his way over to you with damp silky hair which had perked up slightly, the soft white towel slung over his neck to keep his fresh t-shirt from getting soaked through by the water droplets in his hair and a pair of fresh training shorts.

“You’re always a few steps ahead huh?” He smiled as he sat down next to you and relaxed into the couch.

“If you’re referring to the warm clothes I keep in the airing cupboard for you, you’re welcome.” Turning to lazily smile at him.

You both stayed like that for a few moments. A comfortable silence washing over the two of you. Neither of you felt the need to speak up just yet, you both allowed yourselves to indulge in the calming and warm atmosphere around the pair of you.

After a few moments passed by, Oikawa leaned forward to rip a piece off the milk bread loaf. Biting into it he hummed in approval before eating the whole piece. “Y/N-chan, you make the best milk bread you know?” Your laugh rang through Oikawa’s ears. “Your flattery will get you anywhere Oikawa.”

A few moments passed again, nothing said between the two of you. Oikawa had a slight frown on his face looking as if he were deep in thought. You noticed this but decided to let him be for a moment.

The setter sat there trying to find the right words to use to get his current thoughts across to you. Truth be told Oikawa had shown up to your place purely for a general catch up but picking up on the little quirks and details to your routine with each other, he had been thinking about you the minute he noticed the spare clothes you kept for him in the airing cupboard. He had never really lost feelings for you. Sure, he had been on a few dates here and there, but nobody lasted more than 3 dates before he grew bored. His mind would always wander back to thoughts of you and he took this as a sign that these other girls were just temporary fillers for the void left in him when you had split up. He had always known you were the only one who would satisfy his physical and emotional needs, but he wasn’t sure as to the whereabouts you were in your feelings for him so he never spoke up about the situation.

After a few minutes you grew slightly concerned. Yes, you knew the two of you could sit through a while of comfortable silence but the bothered face on your ex worried you slightly.

“Oikawa? Are you okay?”

“Huh? Oh- uh yeah, sorry lost in a thought for a second there.”

He looked up at you with his pretty brown eyes and gave you his signature charming smile.

You had known Oikawa for years and you had grown close enough to be able to tell a genuine smile from a fake one and the smile he was currently pulling right now was most certainly fake. You frowned at the boy making his smile drop a little.

“What's wrong Y/N-chan?”

“I should be asking you that? You should know by now to not pull that half assed expression with me.”

Oikawa sighed and broke eye contact with you as he cast his gaze down to the coffee table.

“It’s just, well- Ah fuck it. You’re really irreplaceable to me. There’s nobody as good as you.”

Your eyes widened at the boy's sudden confession. Did Oikawa Tooru really recite back what feelings you thought you had gotten rid of? Just by that sentence alone, past feelings to which you were certain you had managed to contain and bury had come rushing over you clouding your thoughts and completely throwing you off guard.

“That doesn’t sound like something you say to an ex girlfriend.”

He looked back up and locked his longing eyes into your own.

“Well, maybe I don’t want you to be my ex girlfriend anymore.”

You felt as though your heart couldn’t take much more. Your chest felt tight and you knew for a fact your face was turning red as you felt your skin heat up from the volleyballers direct and unfiltered confession. You opened your mouth but were stopped when Oikawa quickly spoke.

“Listen to me Y/N, I’m not playing games. I’m done trying to fill the gap only you can fill. I’ve fucking missed you like crazy and I didn’t want to admit it. I never said anything because I wasn’t sure what you were thinking or feeling but you have my heart Y/N. It’s always been you. No matter what I do I can't stop thoughts about you creeping back on me when they shouldn’t. Tell me I’m crazy Y/N. I should be over you by now but I’m not because no matter what I do or try, I can’t deny the fact I’m still in fucking love with you!”

You didn’t think twice about your next move. Before you could even think of the words to reply to him, instinct took over you and you threw yourself onto the boy and crashed your lips onto his. He took a second to process what was happening but after a second of not reacting his arms snaked around your waist as he kissed you back with an equal amount of passion. With that one kiss, Oikawa knew the feelings were mutual. You could both feel the raw desire and need for each other, the deep feelings and passion that was once locked away, finally free and was poured into the kiss. He pulled you onto his lap properly as one of his hands drew little circles on your waist while the other made its way up your neck as his fingers skillfully weaved through your silky hair. You pressed your body closer to his as your own hands wandered into his slightly damp locks.

Finally pulling away, you both took a second to catch your breath. You looked up and into Oikawa’s twinkling eyes which held nothing but sincerity and genuine love and adoration for you.

“Idiot. You should’ve spoken sooner.”

Nothing could stop the bright smile on Oikawa’s face. His handsome features lightened up as he laughed and caressed your cheek. Small tears gathered in the corners of his eyes threatening to spill at any moment. You leaned forward and wiped them away before they could fall and left a trail of small pecks across his soft skin.

“You have no idea just how happy you’ve made me. I love you so so much I promise I’ll never leave you again Y/N.”

He spoke with such honesty as a big smile broke onto your own face.

“I’ll hold you to that. And Tooru, I love you too.”

He pulled you in close inhaling the scent of you. Sure you were both okay with your close friendship but this to Oikawa felt like home. That once empty gap that could only be filled by you, full once again making his heart flutter.

Things were okay the way they were but this? This is how things were meant to be.

[wordupcomics]

How would you describe Bob's relationship with Tobey? And will your relationship get better as the comic progresses? ...🤔

Oh boy anon, you don’t How badly I’ve waited for this question! I love the dynamic between them and the progression of that dynamic!

In short, I’d describe their relationship as like a parent-in-law and child-in-law that don’t really like each other but are willing to accept each other in their lives because of the one or several people they have in common (for Tobey and Bob this person is obviously Becky, with Theo and Julie playing a role too)

Their relationship is complicated, and it will only get more complicated before it gets any less so.

That’s a relatively simple way to put it, as it’s constantly changing. So for a more thorough explanation, see under the cut

So I feel context is important here. Context both in terms of important moments in each character’s life and in terms of how they have felt about each other prior to this point.

First, since it’s a shorter bit, let’s discuss an important part of each character that is effecting their current view on each other

For Tobey, Becky’s comment in batch 4 says it all

“I realize you have an issue with the entire concept of abandonment...”

Tobey has huge issues with abandonment. And if he believes you abandoned someone, he’s going to take it very seriously.

Meanwhile Bob has sacrificed so much for Becky. She’s been his number one priority since the day she was forced into his life without warning.

Now let’s talk about how they felt about each other in the past, divided into chunks of time.

Also I’m counting Bob leaving as the same event because they happened close together and not really anything changed in that time

Pre bob leaving/ Tobey going good:

Pretty much indifference on both sides.

For Bob Tobey was just some punk ass kid trying to destroy the city every other week, so basically just another Tuesday

For Tobey, Bob was just the pet of some classmate, and Huggy was just a minor annoyance in his quest to get WordGirl's attention/affections

While Bob was in space:

Bob stayed at indifference, probably even less so than before. Before Tobey at least came to mind (or I guess was more forced into his mind every time a robot crime was committed lol), but while Bob was in space really the only person he thought about was Becky for obvious reasons. Yes, at some point enough time had pasted that Bob realized Becky was old enough that she likely had a family of her own, but Bob never considered the idea that Tobey could be part of that family. If you had suggested to Bob the idea that Becky might have married Tobey, Bob would have been like "I mean I guess it's possible, but I doubt it"

Tobey in general respected and admired Bob/Huggy in this time, the exact amount of respect and admiration changed, as it grew as he got to know Becky. As Tobey go to know Becky, he learned more about Bob, so his respect for Bob was much greater by the time Becky and Tobey were married than when the two were friends. As a parent, Tobey really wanted the kids to know about Bob and encouraged Becky telling the kids stories about Bob. The greater respect and admiration Tobey felt, the more Tobey was convinced that something had happened to Bob, as apposed to Bob leaving by choice. In Tobey’s mind Bob leaving by choice, leaving nothing but a note and practically no explanation, is the same as abandonment. And as Tobey heard about Bob from Becky, her friends and family, it was clear to him that Bob really cared about Becky, and therefore, the idea that Bob would willing leave Becky, abandon her, was not even a possibility. It didn’t make sense, so the only explanation was that something terrible had happened to Bob. Tobey’s perspective here becomes important later.

The very brief period of time where Bob had return to Earth and found out Becky and Tobey were married but hadn’t reunited with Tobey yet (lol very specific):

This one only applies to Bob, but I really wanted to bring it up. I found it very hard to visually show Bob’s reaction, because in my head Bob’s tone was very important, and I couldn’t quite get his facial expression right to translate that tone. So I’ve worried Bob’s reaction to finding out Becky married Tobey comes off as a protective and disapproving “Are you kidding me??? You married Tobey??? What were you thinking?????” Which is not what I intended. It was supposed to be more of clarifying, shocked “Tobey? We’re talking about the same Tobey as when you were a kid? Really? Well okay if that’s who you like...” Basically Bob understands that Becky is an adult and trusts that her and Tobey’s relationship isn’t something bad, he trusts that she’s a good judge of character and judge of what’s okay and not okay. He’s not disapproving, he’s just shocked that Tobey was able to get to the point that Becky would like him enough to marry him. In this time, Bob’s really just curious to see how Tobey turned out.

The Shift

Tobey and Bob each had a moment where their more positive opinions of each other switched to negative ones.

Tobey I made sure you could see his change in behavior.

From happy

To essentially a “Wait what?”

To mad

And notice when this “shift” was. The moment he found out where Bob really had been. The moment he found out Bob DID leave by choice. He did, in Tobey’s eyes, abandoned Becky.

And for Bob, his “shift” was the result of Tobey’s

“IF I HAD CARED ABOUT HER?!” Bob has given up so much for Becky, Becky has always been his number one priority, and Tobey has the nerve to claim that Bob didn’t care about her at all?

(Also notice how Bob referred to it as a “letter”, and Tobey called it a “note” showing how differently they seem the same situation)

In the near future (So for the rest of “Return to Fairy City”

I once mentioned that I wanted Bob to have a horrible first day back, to just have a lot of bad luck in terms of first impressions on Becky’s family. Well...the day isn’t over yet...

Bob has one more unfortunate moment to get through. And it makes Tobey’s life particularly hard. True, what happens isn’t really Bob’s fault, but Bob does cause it. It’ll make sense I promise. And what’s worse, it’s really Tobey’s problem that he now has to deal with. As you can imagine this doesn’t help things (this will all happen next batch btw)

I also plan to do a mini comic for a scene that I don’t have in Return to Fair City, this scene will show Tobey and Becky’s conversation about Bob (not the short one in batch 4, a different one where they are calmer and can actually have a conversation) and them coming to an agreement about the situation and this really dictates how Tobey acts towards Bob going forward. This scene will take place in between two scenes featured in the next batch. I’m thinking I will try to post that before the batch because I think you guys should know where Tobey is coming from when Bob accidentally makes Tobey’s life harder XD

Going forward (Beyond Return to Fair City)

Like I said, Tobey and Bob’s relationship in general is like a parent-in-law and child-in-law who don’t like each other but accept each other in their lives. For a short while, both of them are going to be a bit on guard, basically like “I’m going to try not to be near them, but I’m also going to keep my eye out to spot any potentially problematic behavior from them, and if I see anything, I will DEFINITELY be saying something.”

For Bob he’s on guard because he knows Tobey’s past, and doesn’t know his present. All Bob has to go on is Tobey’s comment about Bob not caring about Becky and that’s not exactly a good sign to him. However he still trusts Becky’s judgment, and he understands that Tobey, no matter how much Bob might not like him, is Becky’s husband and Theo and Julie’s dad. Bob’s not about to say anything that could damage, or worse, break up a family unless there’s something REALLY bad going on.

For Tobey this all goes back to the above mentioned conversation he has with Becky. The two will come to an agreement that works for both of them and Tobey’s actions are part of that agreement. Essentially it comes down to “say something if it’s a red flag, otherwise be civil.”

And spoiler alert, neither will find anything to “say” about the other, so they’ll each slowly move out of that and just into a “Just stay out of each other’s way” type thing.

I love developing their relationship and I look forward to having them go from “I don’t like you, but I accept you as part of my life” to “I don’t like you, but I do care about you” and beyond.

[lokidrabbles]

A talk of Fidelity (Loki x Reader Oneshot)

After a failed attempt to make him envious, the reader finds out of Loki’s past involved with the Goddess of Fidelity.

Note: This is a little lengthy, however I hope this is as close to gender neutral as it can be!

As usual, you found the Asgardian prince making himself at home in your kitchen, his nose deep into some archaic textbook and a mug of some hot drink beside him on your dining table. You noted Loki must have probably rummaged through your cupboards in search of something to munch or sip on, purposefully looking for whatever type of tea you had picked up during your last shopping trip. You had grown to become very familiar with this type of setting and even began to look a little forward to it at the end of your workday. Loki (at least you assumed) would wait for you to arrive to your small abode, chiming in on your musings from the day, whatever drama had happened between your coworkers, or how much you had been craving some sort of sweet. Ever so often, Loki would offer some type of commentary or disclosure on how humans, or Midgardians, had such an unusual way to go about their day.

Today, however, you were understandably curious at how Loki would react to your a certain account on your way home from work, and so, you jumped right into the conversation piece unannounced.

“You won’t believe what just happened to me on my way home.”

You rang in quite loudly, placing your belongings on the kitchen counter. Loki, a a tad irritated you had disrupted his focus with such an entrance, gently closed his literature, his eyes narrowed on you.

“Pray tell us.”

You gingerly took a seat next to him on the table, a playful grin displayed on your face.

“Guess.”

“No.”

“Okay, fine I’ll tell you!” You inched in closer towards him, wanting to explore what possible way Loki would react to this. There was nothing exactly ‘official’ between the two of you, but, you figured the ongoing domesticity indicated some sort of relationship. And somewhere within your gut, you had a notion he’d be the jealous type.

Loki nodded quickly towards you, his arms crossed over his chest. “(Y/N), get on with it.”

“I ran into my ex! Can you believe it?” You whispered with some weird excitement in your voice.

Loki remained quiet for a bit, awaiting for you to offer more context towards the news. He shook his head and gestured at you. “Do you wish for me to maim him or something of the sort? You’ve lost me for a bit.”

“What? No!” You threw your hands up in the air, visibly surprised at his nonchalant approach to stabbing people. Knowing Loki for quite a while provided you with some understanding of the way he would often like to resolve issues as such. And you could not allow him to freely roam the city and potentially harm someone. Again.

“What do you want me to do with this information then?”

You sputtered. “Don’t you want to know what we talked about?”

“I have a hunch I’m going to hear about it regardless.”

You clasped your hands together eagerly. “Well, he asked if I was seeing anyone. Obviously, he was probably insinuating I’d be free tonight or something of the sort.”

Loki nodded attentively, taking a quick sip of his tea.

“Or-.” You paused briefly. “Maybe they actually think I’m still single or something. But anyways, they did ask me for my current number so we could catch up sometime. Such a weird experience. Huh, Loki?

Your eyes were focused on Loki, awaiting for some type of arrogant comment on how you shouldn’t be talking to anyone else who has had this type of history with you. Yes, you were seeking out for some defensive words on his part as it absolutely melted you on the inside.

He yawned.

“You’re out of teabags by the way.”

Your grin immediately dropped to a scowl.

“You suck Loki.” Defeated, you drooped your head onto the table, a pronounced pout on your face. Loki raise an eyebrow at your dramatics, quickly catching on to your intentions.

“Was this your attempt to make me jealous? Quite childish (Y/N), I don’t see the need to do so.”

Loki playfully flicked your lower lip, his own twisting into a sly smirk. He admitted to himself how it was endearing to have you explore this certain feeling within him in an attempt to have some affirmation over his possessiveness. Despite your arguments with him, Loki knew you enjoyed how dominating he would be from time to time.

“I’ve seen you flip out when other guys or girls keep staring at me. Why is this different?” You mumbled, gesturing confusion with your hands.

“Because I know you’re not foolish enough to run back to that rat of your ex-partner, or wanting to be unfaithful.”

“You sound so sure of yourself.” You replied with some contempt.

“Of course, you’ve been blessed with my companionship. Who in their right mind would want to ruin it?”

Loki lifted his chin up with much gusto, absolutely adoring his own stroke of his ego. You stuck your tongue out at him. You hated when he would become so arrogant (and knowing he was damn right about it).

“Being faithful huh?” You lifted yourself back upwards, resting your chin gently on your palm, again, leaning in closer towards him. “Is this something important to you?”

“What kind of question is that?”

“I mean, when you mentioned that, to me it sounds like seeing this as something for the long run.” You explained, motioning your hand towards him and back to you.

“Fidelity is a virtue I do value very closely believe it or not. Is this odd?”

You snorted at how genuine his question sounded. As far as you knew, Loki was actually pretty “faithful” himself. There wouldn’t be a single night out where he wouldn’t receive unwarranted attention from others despite it being very clear he was there with you. Both men and women would literally throw themselves at him with deplorable attempts to flirt, buy him a drink or attempt to obtain his number (luckily he was still very technology challenged). Your quick instinct was to assume Loki would absolutely revel in the attention, however, he was quite tame when encountering this. Actually, to be fair, Loki was the most respectful person in this aspect, as he immediately shoots down anyone else attempting to woo him away from you. Something you never really experienced before.

“It’s not odd. However, you never struck me as the long term commitment type if we’re being honest here.”

Loki softly hummed, leaning back gently at the back of his chair.

“Maybe. That is something I would have considered a long time ago. I have been faithful to others before however.”

Your brain stopped functioning for a hot second.

“Wait, you actually dated someone in the past?” Honestly, the fact did not surprise you at much. You didn’t need to be reminded of the matter of Loki being over a thousand years old and probably being knowing more people than you ever will in your lifespan. Surely, somewhere within the entirely of his lifetime, he would have a partner of sort. Perhaps even more than you could count. You suddenly realized you were probably dating history’s biggest man whore.

Loki placed both of his palms together, looking up in deep contemplation, trying to draw far back from within his memory.

“Dated? Well, yes I suppose that’s the best way to refer to being betrothed nowadays.”

Luckily, you weren’t drinking anything of the sorts at the moment, or surely it would have been sprayed out loosely from your lips. Your eyes became wide, your expression largely speaking for your utmost shock at his words.

“Loki, you were engaged?” Your voice was loud and clear.

Loki shot you a confused look. He didn’t expect you to have taken something like this in such an adverse way. It wasn’t particularly an interesting fact to talk about. However, he did slightly enjoy how flushed you had looked, especially how your cheeks turned slightly pink.

“Touchy subject? You’re notably worked up over it. Look how red you’ve gotten.” He was humoring you again.

A sputtering noise came from your lips as you became at a loss for words. This certainly wasn’t being ‘worked’ up. This was genuinely new information for you. Very important information which you assumed would have been brought up at some point. You clasped your hands behind your head, clearly in disbelief as Loki continued to nonchalantly sip at his tea mug, completely unfazed by your current crisis.

“Uh, don’t you think that is an important detail to throw in? Especially to me.” You lowly said through your gritted teeth.  

“Why? It was a few centuries ago. Many, many years before the idea of you was even conceived.” He playfully poked your nose in an attempt to get you to lighten up. No avail, your gaze was still wary and rigid.

Loki, in obvious frustration, lowered his head and let out a pronounced sigh. “(Y/N), please. This is not as big of a situation as your’re believing it is.”

You released your hands, gripping them down at the edge of the table, ready to give him a piece of your mind.

“Hey, don’t get annoyed with me Loki. It’s just a tad irksome to just find out about, probably a significant period in your life. Especially as the person who is currently sleeping buck naked next to you.”

“And with this fact alone, you should know this is something you shouldn’t be so upset about. I don’t let just anyone take a gaze at my nude self.”

His brows bumped together in a scowl. “If I tell you, will you please stop interrogating me?” You nodded furiously, scooting your chair even closer to him, completely invading his personal bubble. “Tell me.”

“It was many years ago. I was young, my parents wanted to me to marry nobility, many events transpired in between, and I never wed her. Clear? Honestly, it’s been so long ago, my memory is still a bit hazy with it all.”

“Why, what happened? Details, Loki.” You tapped harshly on the table with your finger. “You can’t just leave out details like that!”

In a flash, Loki quickly gripped your fidgeting hand, immediately halting your agitation towards him. His gaze was narrow and fixed on yours. “Stop. Let me finish.”

You immediately shut your mouth like a scolded child. Loki was a trickster, but even you could tell when he was being stern with you.

“She died. That’s why I never got married.”

A knot formed in your throat. Immediately, you swallowed, and felt it drop down to the pit of your stomach with the weight of a boulder. Loki must have been able to take hint from your pale face, holding your hand very tightly to, once again, assure you everything was fine.

“I don’t understand.” It was all you could spew out.

“She died, it was a while ago, like I said. (Y/N), I’ve told you I don’t like to repeat myself.”

“I mean, I got that, but, how? What happened?”

“Does it matter? She died, and so, my engagement was null and void.”

Silence fell the both of you. You weren’t sure what to make of it. For now, you felt entirely like a pest towards him with how much you poked and prodded and a conversation piece which could have been hugely personal to him. Yet, at the same time you were happy he had told you such an intimate part of his past. Or at least you assumed it must have been something special for him.

You looked up at Loki, biting your lip in shame.

“What was her name?”

He raised an eyebrow at you, noting how your energy had died down along with your inquiry. In all honestly, Loki knew you had absolutely nothing to worry about. But again, you were human, and erratic, and he wanted to make sure you had some peace of mind. “You’re certain you want me to tell you more about her?”

“If you don’t mind.” You said meekly. Truthfully, it was something extremely hard to hear. Who would want to hear about your partner’s first potential life mate, only to hear they passed away abruptly? But you also wanted to demonstrate your personal strength to Loki. Whatever it meant.

Loki reach a hand towards your face, tucking a strand of lose hair behind your ear, slowly trickling his fingers across your check, caressing it gently. A seemingly simple gesture, but you knew exactly what he insinuated through it. Reassurance.

“Sigyn. She was the daughter of a nobleman who had a very prominent relationship with our family. Of course, many noble families would fight among each other to see which daughter would be able to wed into royalty. Quite a dense situation for me once I realized how most Asgardian noblewomen were.”

”Mhm?” ”Self-centered, vain. Not the type to have an engaging conversation with, if you understand what I mean. Luckily, Sigyn was a bit more interesting.”

”Interesting…in a good way?” You cocked your head playfully.

“Of course. She was young, very kind, very humble, but…she was a tad vapid and naive unfortunately.”

“And she got engaged to an arrogant and narcissistic Prince. I wonder who truly got the crappy end of the deal then.”

You attempted to picture a younger Loki within your imagination only utilizing your most recent information and notion you had of the Asgardian, which wasn’t exactly your notion of prince-y qualities.

“Mind you, there were many noblewomen who would have killed to be wed to me. Status, power, among many other qualities.”

You noted to overbearingly confident smile in his face. Like you said, arrogant and narcissistic.

“Tone it down Loki.” You retorted with jest. “Remember you got stuck with me, something faaaar from nobility, so come back down for a bit.”

“And you must remind me so Midgardian.” He arched a sly brow at you, knowing very well he was also pulling your leg. Loki raised himself from his seat, cup in hand, heading over to the sink to politely wash it after raiding your cabinets earlier.

A tug of curiosity continued to pull at you, despite fighting with yourself to stop being so damn nosy. But again, it was always some type of accomplishments to have Loki disclose something this personal towards you.

“As with most Asgardians, how unbelievably beautiful was she?” You began to slightly twiddle your thumbs, hoping it wouldn’t be as bad as you would imagine it to be.

“Most Asgardians? Well yes, she was among the most beautiful women in all of Asgard, worthy enough to be wed to one of the princes.” Loki muttered, continued to rinse out his cup, and drying his hands on a hand towel.

You snorted. “So I probably shouldn’t even fathom comparing myself to a literal goddess.”

Loki chortled. Your ears perked up. Loki never chortled. Your defenses shot up immediately.

“Oh, you are nowhere close to being like Sigyn. Goodness. It’s like…what’s the expression?” Loki turned to you, poking his lips in contemplation. “Comparing apples to…grapes?”

“Oranges, Loki. Apples to oranges. And no, that’s not making me feel any better.” You began to hesitantly tap on the table, shooting an extremely irritated look towards him.  

“Ah yes, oranges. Sigyn belonged to nobility. She had discipline, class, wisdom. And you are-”

“Don’t answer that! Ugh.” You, again, dramatically, drooped your head on the table, feeling that familiar weight over again. Loki rolled his eyes skyward, stepping behind you, patting your head to humor your theatrics.

Your eyes attempted to look behind towards him, slowly raising your head to a more mature position.

“Do you miss her?”

A simple question. Something Loki was able to respond to without any hesitation.

“I did, for a brief period. Time heals however, and I tend to be able move forward. She’s a fond memory now, back when everything seemed much more simpler.”

His last words sent a pang of pain in your chest. You were no stranger to Loki’s recent history and all of the travesties which had befallen him. Hearing him voice some far recognition of how life was, maybe, much happier, indirectly hurt.

“I’m sorry I brought this up. I’m happy you told me about it though.”

Loki leaned over behind you, his sleek arms wrapping around your shoulders in a close embrace, resting his neck on the crook of your neck. You shivered as you felt his soft breath on your bare skin, his lips dangerously close to touching your sensitive neck. You felt him chuckle slightly.

“I was going to say, while Sigyn was the definition of nobility, you are much more interesting.”

“Oh.” You cursed at him for being so damn slick with you. You felt his arms become tighter around you, and you swore you could feel his heartbeat along with yours.

“Perhaps why I have a sickening soft spot for you. You’re nothing like that, you are a completely different experience. You’re a  mess, a fool, a little dimwitted human. But you’re also the most genuine being I’ve ever met.”

You swore your heart was going to jump out of your chest at any moment, feeling Loki’s cool lips give you an endearing peck on your cheek. Your entire body heated up, and you cursed yourself at how ridiculous it must have been for you to have caused such a scene like this.However, you would be lying to yourself if you didn’t absolutely burst with glee at his attention towards you.

“(Y/N).” He whispered coolly into your ear.

“Hmm?” “If you ever tell me you’ve run into your ex-partner again, and you tell me you’ve talked to them again, I will make sure to make them disappear from this timeline. Don’t toy with me like this again.”

And yes, you determined Loki had a deep pang of jealousy over you, much to your dismay.

[silver-lily-louise]

Keep Up - a Shadowhunters fanfic

Summary: This isn’t ‘the old days’. Tonight, she’s a little tipsy, and she’s standing in the home of two people she loves more than life itself. Tonight, she’s had enough. At a New Year’s Eve party in Alicante, Maryse runs into a few familiar faces from the Lightwood-Branwell wedding-that-never-was, and sets the record straight. 

A/N: Hi! I read THIS piece by @alecmagnuslwb, and had a thought: what if all four of Robert and Maryse’s kids were queer? And what if they all chose Downworlders? Which led to this - so please enjoy Maryse owning her character development, and defending the extended family she has learned to love and wouldn’t trade for the world. <3

Read on AO3, or below! 

~oOo~

Magnus knows how to throw a party. Maryse has known this longer than she’s been able to admit it, ever since the one he organised for Max’s rune ceremony years ago. The walls echo softly with laughter and chatter, the buffet is full of enough variety to make things interesting whilst also offering guests some time-honoured favourites, and the music is a gentle hum in the background – present, but never loud enough to make conversing difficult.

Which is probably why Maryse hears a few familiar voices, their disdain discordant against the calm, joyful atmosphere. ‘Of course, I’m not against it, per se-‘ ‘No, of course not. But trust me, I understand the… hesitation.’ ‘As do I, honestly. What people do in private is one thing, but in positions of leadership… Our politics rely on tradition, that’s how we stay on course.’ ‘Yes, yes, exactly.’ The last voice lowers, continuing in a murmur. ‘Personally… -icante even needs… -rlock.’

Maryse turns with a slight frown, and has the misfortune of meeting eyes with the source of the discontent. ‘Maryse!’ Sophia exclaims, and Maryse suppresses a groan as the short, blonde woman moves towards her, leaning in to press an air kiss to each cheek. ‘Oh, it’s been an age,’ she says, linking arms once more with her brick house of a husband, Jeremiah, and poorly concealing the pity in her eyes as her gaze scans over Maryse’s de-runed arms and neck. ‘It has,’ Maryse agrees, managing not to cringe under the quiet, condescending scrutiny. ‘When was the last time we were all together?’ Probably some dry political event or another, she thinks. These four, at least in her eyes, are the kind of people you only invite to something when you need to keep the peace; when their departments are going to be overseeing a factor of one of your projects, or when you’re about to need a favour from them. Of course, it’s possible Magnus and Alec invited them for their scintillating company, but she rather doubts it.

‘It was at the, uh… wedding,’ Colin says, chiming in as he and Erica wander over. Well, that certainly makes sense. Alec’s almost-wedding to Lydia was very much a political affair. ‘You know,’ Erica says, almost conspiratorially, her pity only a little better-concealed than Sophia’s, ‘we were so sorry to hear about your de-runing, Maryse – weren’t we, dear? Especially after it came so soon after… well. The wedding.’ ‘Still,’ Jeremiah adds, ‘despite all of that, your eldest has managed to do… surprisingly well for himself. That must be some comfort.’

And in the old days, Maryse would have reluctantly agreed with them, ‘forgiving’ Alec simply to avoid dragging the family name any further through the mud. Even after Max’s ceremony, when Magnus stopped her son tumbling from the roof and she began to realise how wrong she’d been about Downworlders, she probably would have laughed off her doubt in such company – waxed lyrical about being the mother of the Inquisitor, focusing on her pride and stifling the mental turmoil until she was once again in private.

But this isn’t the old days. Tonight, she’s a little tipsy – even after all this time, she forgets how quickly champagne affects a Mundane body – and she’s standing in the home of two people she loves more than life itself. Even from here, she can see the warded doorway behind which baby Max is sleeping. Tonight, she’s had enough.

‘Yes,’ she says breezily, locking eyes with Jeremiah. ‘My eldest has done well for himself, hasn’t he? I mean, as if inventing the portal, banishing Asmodeus from this plane, sealing the rift above Idris and saving the world wasn’t enough, he’s now the first ever High Warlock of Alicante? Oh, yes, I’m unspeakably proud of him. What mother wouldn’t be?’

Jeremiah’s eyes widen in surprise, but Sophia titters a laugh. ‘Ah, well – yes, of course, but we actually meant – ‘ ‘Oh – my second eldest?’ Maryse interrupts, and when Sophia nods, she tilts her head in mock confusion. ‘Hm. Well, Meliorn didn’t tell me about any promotion – as I understand it, his position in the Seelie Queen’s guard is fairly high-ranking as it is – oh, unless you mean the union ceremony? I didn’t know you’d heard about that. It was beautiful, though, yes. He makes Jace and Clary so happy.’

The small group in front of her is growing steadily more wary, but she carries on, because if there’s one thing she knows it’s how to hold the floor and make a point. ‘Of course, if you didn’t hear about the ceremony, that means you were likely referring to Alec. And you’d be right again, obviously. Becoming Inquisitor, fighting for lasting changes to outdated traditions, now fatherhood – he truly goes from strength to strength, has done ever since he was a boy. I’m so proud of the example he sets for the others, especially as he handed down the position of Head of the New York Institute to Isabelle. She’s now doing wonderful work alongside her girlfriend, the current Alpha of the local werewolf pack, and their boyfriend, the first Daylighter in Angel-knows-how-many years. I can only hope Max goes on to follow in their footsteps, standing strong in whichever path he chooses to take – he and the person he’s seeing would be here tonight, of course, but Rowan was only turned recently. It takes time to build up the kind of effortless control our dear Maia exhibits, and understandably, they didn't want to risk transforming at a party full of drunk Shadowhunters.’

Maryse steps forward, and although the couples in front of her are too politically savvy to show weakness by stepping back, she relishes the spark of caution in their eyes, the unease she’s brought them to so easily. ‘I’m not such a fool that I’ve forgotten what it’s like to think how you think,’ she says, dropping the airs and graces. ‘The Angel knows I’ve done my share of harm in the name of tradition. But times are changing, and speaking from personal experience? I’d advise you to keep up. I have nine children now – and one day I may have even more, if Max decides to share his life with anyone. And I am so, so proud of each and every one of them. If you plan on accepting my family’s hospitality in the future, you’d do well to remember that.’ She smirks, raising her glass in a mock toast, finishing her champagne as quiet settles over their little bubble of conversation.

No, she realises – over the whole room. Because the only noise now is the gentle music in the background and the odd murmur, and a quick glance confirms her sudden suspicion; almost everyone in the room is looking at her, apparently enraptured by her speech.

Her eyes catch on a few particularly important faces in the crowd. Alec just looks stunned, while Izzy’s eyes are watering, her lips curved slightly in a trembling smile. She’s holding Maia’s hand tightly, her grip returned even as Maia flattens her mouth into a straight line, her eyes dancing with amusement. She’s hiding it much better than Jace, though – he lets out a snort, quickly covering his mouth and pretending to cough.

Magnus appears then, the image of an in-control host as he waves a hand and a dull flash sparks over the buffet table, replacing the savoury food with gelato, tiramisu, and various other sweet treats. ‘Everyone, please help yourselves to dessert,’ he says. ‘Oh, and keep an eye on the time – midnight fast approaches!’

The tension in the room breaks as people start moving with interest towards the food, or turn back to their dancing and conversation. Magnus, for his part, sweeps back to rejoin Alec – but not before laying a hand gently on Maryse’s arm, flashing her a small smile and a glimpse of golden eyes. She smiles in return, marvelling slightly at how what was once a show of intimidation is now one of trust.

Turning away, she spots Luke across the room, once again talking to Raphael and Simon, and begins to make a beeline for them. She’s sure they’ll make for far better company than certain others she’s talked to this evening.

~oOo~

[writingpaperghost]

I Would Offer It Happy With a Smile on My Face (Chapter 3)

Chapter 3: Even When We’re Fallen or When We’re Hurt

Asahi's starting to get the hang of this Earth. Starting.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24860734/chapters/60289978

“Okay!” The sound shattered the peaceful silence in KPaRS’ main headquarters room. Gathered in it were the members of the main crew. The one who spoke was a their captain, Matsuoka. He was the oldest member of the crew and had been there the longest, though he’d deny his age whenever asked. All in good fun, everyone knew. The first thing one might notice if he weren’t in his uniform might be his light brown hair, but as it were now, his uniform is the first thing one would notice. It appeared a bit different than the normal uniform, it didn’t have a high collar, the stripes there went down the front and met the ones at the bottom and sides. It lacked the pockets that a normal uniform on the sides, and on his arm was a sort of band, yellow, red, and blue. He had his hands clasp together in front of him, a smile as he continued. “Now that we’re all here, we can begin our meeting.”

To one side were the two engineers, who’s appearance stood out the most compared to everyone else in the room. The first one, a woman named Chikako, had brown hair, pulled back into low twin pony tails, and she had bright blue eyes, covered by a pair of protective glasses.She wore tan overalls, with a tool belt around her waist, underneath green tank. She wore dark green finger less gloves that came up to about halfway to her elbow. Over her overalls was her uniform vest, which was much light the jacket that others wore, but with only one pocket over her chest.

The other engineer stood beside her, a man named Katsuhito, who looked far more casual in his demeanor. Light brown hair kept back in a low and short ponytail, he wore a uniform much like Chikako’s, though unlike her, he wore only the standard mechanics uniform for KPaRS. Tan overalls and dark shirt underneath with the uniform vest, the only part out of place was the top of his overalls, where the straps hung at his sides.

“Wouldn’t it have made more sense to have this meeting when the monsters started acting strange?” Katsuhito asked, shoving his hands into the pockets of her overalls.

Matsuoka smiled, “This meeting is partly about the Kaiju’s strange behavior, or at least what we can do about it, we’re still waiting on research from the conservation.” He looks over the group for a moment, “But let’s worry about that part for now.”

To the other side were the pilots and the singular member of Ground Support. There was Jun and besides Jun was Rin. Rin had reddish brown hair, shorter than Katsuhito’s but still a little long. Much like Jun, they wore KPaRS’ uniform, though they lacked the goggles, which were instead replaced with a green scarf that was loosely wrapped around their neck.

On the other side of Rin was Fuyuko, the single member of Ground Support, who’s duty was to ensure that citizens evacuated when a Kaiju came into the city. Fuyuko had black hair held up in a ponytail and dark skin, upon which one might notice a few scars that came mainly from debris. Her job was something of a dangerous one that put her near buildings that could be damaged or destroyed, after all. The most remarkable part of her uniform was her gloves and the utility belt around her waist, which held first aid materials and the like.

Rin spoke, “Do we have any idea why all the monsters suddenly started attacking like this?”

“Unfortunately,” Matsuoka sighed, slightly, “The researchers at the conservation have yet to be able to determine what has been agitating the Kaiju...”

“Well, we can’t just continue trying to deal with them as we have.” Fuyuko grumbles, “As it’s been, we can barely do anything!”

“Of course, Fuyuko, That brings me to my next point.” Matsuoka paused for a moment, then looks over to Katsuhito and Chikako, “The higher ups have asked that we begin to develop more... effective methods for chasing Kaiju out of the city.”

“More effective?” Chikako asked, barely hiding her skepticism, “We barely know why their doing these things! How are we supposed to make something that works better?! Just make some really strong guns!?”

Matsuoka’s often neutral face faltered, showing a slight degree of what might have been discomfort. He sighs slightly, but a proper response wasn’t necessary. It was easy to tell what he would say, they all had known that it would be a possibility since it became clear that the monster attack weren’t just a string of odd coincidences.

Katsuhito sighed, resignation clear on his face, “We’ll come up with something, won’t we, Chikako?”

“Don’t really have much of a choice, now do we?” She huffed, crossing her arms, her voice dripping in annoyance.

“It’s not ideal,” Matsuoka finally said, “But as far as they are concerned, if we can’t stop these attacks than they’ll just find someone who will. At least if we are the ones designing and using the methods we can at least try to lessen how much harm comes to the Kaijus.”

“Guess so,” Katsuhito sighed once again, rubbing his temple with one of his hands, the other slipping into his overall pockets once more.

“Great!” Their captain brought a smile to his face, though it appeared rather forced, “Now on to our next topic...”

“Which is?” Rin asked.

“The curious giant that has began to appear, so the so called ‘Ultrawoman Grigio’.”

An unusual commotion followed, a reaction that was odd for the group. But this was one of the few cases where people had different opinions. They all agreed that Kaijus shouldn’t just be killed, even if they were rampaging. They all couldn’t agree about what to think of Ultrawoman Grigio.

“I think it’s pretty clear that she’s got something to do with the monsters.” Jun growled, “Obviously, she has to behind them.”

Beside her, Rin looked less sure. “Well, I don’t know about that,” They muttered, “But she does help deal with the Kaiju, and with less violence. It makes our lives a lot easier.”

“Hah!” Katsuhito laughed, “Okay, but Jun’s gotta be right. She’s clearly behind the monsters!”

Chikako shrugs, “I don’t care what’s she’s up to, I’m more curious as to where she came from. She just sort of showed up, after all.”

Fuyuko seemed to hold more of an opinion than Chikako, “In the two attacks since Grigio appeared, there was way less damage and civilian injuries.” She’d know, after all. She was the one of them that was on the ground in the thick of those sort of things.

Then there’s Matsuoka, who watches passively. He doesn’t seemed horribly bugged by the conversation, though he seems to have a smile upon his face. He crosses his arms and continues to watch, ready to intervene in case the discussion escalated into an argument.

Regardless, that Grigio was certainly interesting...

---

Asahi really never knew what to do with herself. Sometimes, when Tomomi needed help, she took photos for him. But outside of that and dealing with Kaijus - and a Kaiju hasn’t shown up since Gomess and that was about a week before - she didn’t exactly have a lot to do. She’d read some of the books that Tomomi had lying around his apartment, but that was honestly starting to get old.

She explored the city more for a few days, but at this point, she’d explored about as much as she could. A good part of one of the days was spent with Tomomi looking for clothes so she actually had something to wear other than what she arrived in. But she still didn’t know what to do with the rest of her excessive free time.

She couldn’t really try to find a job, since she didn’t actually exist in this universe. So she’s left with little to do throughout the day. If Tomomi was there, she’d be able to talk to him, though there was only so much to talk about. But right now, she was alone in the apartment, with one of Tomomi’s books laying by her side.

She was sooooo bored.

This Earth wasn’t that different from her own, but she was already finding differences. She wasn’t seen a sign of Aizen Tech, which was pretty weird to her, but fine since she seemed to remember that Makoto Aizen was a bit of a kook who caused her brothers a lot of trouble.

But then this Earth had it’s own really important events! She was going through a few a Tomomi’s non fiction books and multiple times she found reference to things called “The Awakening” and “The Terrible Fights” or other similar titles. While she was able to learn from one of the books that The Awakening was a time period where a bunch of slumbering Kaiju awoke, resulting in the world they were in now, where Kaijus were essentially giant animals. She’d have to ask Tomomi about The Terrible Fights, because that sounded very bad.

But none of this solved her current boredom.

She could go to the park! That’s a great idea, Asahi decided. There was a park that wasn’t very far from where Tomomi’s apartment, she’d found it when she exploring a few days before. Yeah, that’s a great idea.

So a few minutes later, Asahi walked around the park, taking in her surroundings. There wasn’t much special about the park, but it was nice and rather peaceful. Or as peaceful as a public park in the middle of the day could be. But someone catches her eye, though she isn’t sure why. There was a man on a bench, his head tilted backwards. His eyes appeared to be closed, though Asahi doubted that he was actually asleep.

Asahi moves over and sits on the other half of the bench. Being closer allowed her to see the vest that he wore, which seemed vaguely familiar. It was like the jacket of the KPaRS pilot, Jun, but as a sort of vest. He must work for KPaRS too, though maybe not in the same way as Jun did.

When she sits down, he opens an eye and looks over at her, an eyebrow arched curiously. “Are you okay?” She asked.

The man moved his head forward, turning it to look at her. He seemed a bit surprised, though he might have been hiding it. “Why do you care?”

Asahi digs her hand into her cardigan pocket, grabbing one of her candies. Those, thankfully, were something that didn’t change between her Earth and this one. She pulls her hand out and opens it, presenting the candy. “Candy?” She offers, “They’re really happy!”

The man looks hesitant, eyeing the candy and then her with suspicion. He raised his hand, slowly and hesitantly, then carefully takes the candy from her hand. He examines the wrapper, sniffs it as if to determine the flavor, than slowly unwraps the candy. She plops it in his mouth.

“Thank you,” He says, careful to make sure his words are understandable.

“You’re welcome!” She beams, “You seemed really preoccupied, so I thought that maybe something was on your mind?”

The man sucked on the candy for a moment, eyeing her. Then he says, “As you can probably tell, I work for KPaRS. Given the past week or so, being a bit stressed is a given.”

“Oh...” Asahi thinks for a moment, “What do you do?”

The man smiles, “I’m an engineer,” He explained, “And given the fact that Kaijius have been rampaging for almost no reason, so I kinda am one of the ones that need to figure out what to use to stop them.”

 “Ah, like better nets or something?”

He scoffs, “Better nets. I wish.” He grumbles, “But the higher ups have decided that no. Having better pacification and containment measures isn’t enough, we need to use actual freaking weapons.”

He waves his hands about his head, eyes closed as he continues to gripe, “I mean, shit! Let’s not care that these Kaijus are sentient and have feelings and such like humans do!” He adjusts his vest, “Or that it’s our job to try to protect the Kaijus as much as people! That doesn’t matter the second that it starts being an inconvenience to everyone else!”

Asahi winced.

“Oh,” The man saw, “I’m sorry, I get a bit...”

“Passionate?”

He laughs, “Yeah,”

“I’m sure you’ll figure it out,” Asahi said, looking towards the sky, “I mean, there’s got to be a way that you could create something more effective than what you’ve been working with, but not super lethal...”

She waves her hands, a clear enthusiasm in her movements, “Because killing Kaijus is a really unhappy thing to do.” She thinks for a moment, returning her gaze to the man, “Maybe something like a stun gun? I dunno...”

The man looks at her and doesn’t respond immediately, then he sighs, “Maybe...” Then he thinks some more. “You might be on to something...”

“Oh...” Asahi hadn’t actually expected that. “Er, well, I don’t know about that...”

“No really! I’ll have to think about it and talk to me coworker... but it could work.” He actually looks pretty excited, all things considered. “Ah, I’m Katsuhito Yoshioka.”

“Nice to meet you!” She smiles in response, “I’m Asahi Minato.”

Katsuhito checked his watch, then stood up quickly. “Shit! I have to go!” He starts to leave, then quickly turns around and adds, “It was great talking to you!”

Well, that was an interesting conversation.

---

Asahi was back at Tomomi’s apartment talking with Tomomi. Or it was more like Tomomi was talking about his day, because Asahi hadn’t had much happen, other than her conversation with Katsuhito. It was during this talking that the TV, which had been set to the news with the volume low, caught her attention.

There was a Kaiju attack, the screen showing footage. The Kaiju had two large horns, which curled into hooks at the ends and it’s mouth was beak-like. It’s arms and legs appeared to be layered in a manner similar to a pine cone, it’s hands were sort of pincer like. Asahi thought it looked kinda silly.

“Oh, great,” She said, “A Kaiju.”

“An Eletrikzaurus,” Tomomi informs her, “True to it’s name, it can send an electrical current through it’s body, shocking anyone who touches it.”

“That’s fine, I don’t need to touch it to fight it,”

“It’s horns can fire a beam and it’s hands might be able to detach. Not sure on that one though.”

“...” Asahi was silent for a moment, “That’s a little harder to deal with, but I’ll manage.”

She heads towards the door, waving to Tomomi, “Okay, gonna go fight this Kaiju, bye!”

“Good luck!” He calls back. Asahi runs through the hallways, trying to get out of the complex as quick as possible. She needed to get outside to transform, first. When she reaches the street, she pulls out her Gyro.

“Color me with your power, Grigio!”

Like with Gomess, Eletrikzaurus quickly brought it’s attention to her, instead of continuing to focus on the building he was swatting at. Grigio began to review what she knew. Okay, be careful if she touches it, it could shock her. But it could also definitely shoot her with a beam, and maybe detach it’s hands. She could probably dodge the beam, so it would probably be best to keep a distance.

She summons her bow and starts to fire arrows at the monster. Really, that seemed to work pretty well, so she figured she would keep up with that tactic.

---

Katsuhito watched the screens as they showed Grigio fighting the Kaiju. She was staying far away, shooting it with her arrow. Somehow, she knew enough about the Kaiju to avoid risking to get shocked. Either someone told her... or maybe she knew since she was the one causing them to attack? Somehow, despite his earlier thoughts, right now, watching Grigio, Katsuhito doubted that.

Well, that doesn’t matter right now, he was instead finishing his design. Like the girl, Asahi, had suggested before, it was essentially a taser. It would be able to shoot a power electrical shot. Jun and Rin would have to be careful not to miss, or at least not to hit anything with people or electrical devices in it.

“Oooh,” Chikako coos from over his shoulder, “That looks cool! You think the higher ups will be okay with it?”

“I hope so,”

---

The fight was going fine, at least for a while. But now! Now Eletrikzaurus has started dodging her arrows, even her Grigio Scatter Shots! Fine! She’d have to change her tactics, though she was still trying to figure out the best way. She might need to get close though, since she only had a few more ways to attack the monster. She’d need to weaken it like she did with Gomess, then she could tie it up.

Wait, what is it doing? Up at it’s horns, something was forming... Where did Tomomi say it could fire beams from? Didn’t he say the...

Crap... Eletrikzaurus prepared to fire a beam from it’s curved horns. Grigio could try to stop it with a barrier or she could try to dodge it instead. But if she did that, the building behind her would get hit! But she couldn’t tank the hit either, so that seemed to leave only one option.

“Grigio Barrier!” She managed to bring up a barrier just in time to stop the beam. Right, now she had an opening, or at least she hoped she did. She runs forward and tried to punch the monster.

Technically, she did succeed in punching it, really, it did little to try to stop her. What it did do, was electrocute her when she hit it. Grigio stumbles back, clutching her hand, but still tingling a bit all around. Shit.She didn’t expect it to be able to electrocute her so quickly.

Maybe she’d done enough damage to use Grigio Shot? Though she wasn’t frankly all that sure... Even though she’d put distance between her and Eletrikzaurus, she saw something coming towards her. She raises her arms to cover her head, and then the monsters hands hit her. But the monster itself was still a ways away. Well, that answered the question of whether it could detach it’s hands or not.

She swats the hands - if they could really be called that - away, sort of punching them while they were in the air. They flew back to the monster, reattaching in it’s wrists. Right. That’s a thing it does.

Alright, maybe she could just finish this fight? Her color timer began to flash and beep, so that seemed to answer her question. She positioned her arms and aimed and Eletrikzaurus. “Grigio Shot!”

The monster stumbles back, then she uses her Grigio Bind, tying it up. She waits a moment to make sure that it didn’t break free. Once she was sure, she smiles to herself and leaves, happy to let KPaRS to handle it from there.

---

“Okay! Where could that portal possibly lead to?” Katsumi, as the oldest of the Minato siblings, had long since learned how to be calm under pressure. Or at least as calm as he possibly could.

Isami was doing a considerably worse job at appearing calm. Which is to say, he did not appear calm at all. Instead, he paced around the Minato’s living room. “I don’t know. We’ve searched everywhere we could think of... and she’d be able to come home herself! Unless something happened...”

“We’re... we’re not getting anywhere with this, are we?”

Their mom walked in, standing with her arms crossed, “You’re really not.”

“Mom!” Isami yelped, “Have you found anything?”

“Nothing for sure, but I’m sure we’ll find her. And I’m sure she’s fine. She is an Ultra like the two of you.”

“Yeah,” Katsumi notes, “But she’s not as good at fighting. If something happens...”

“We’ll just have to trust she’ll be fine,” Their mother moved over to them, rubbing their backs. “We’ll find her. I’m sure where ever she is, she’s safe.”

---

“So it turns out Eletrikzaurus can totally detach it’s hands.” Asahi says to Tomomi when she returns to the apartment.

“So it turns out.”Asahi's starting to get the hang of this Earth. Starting.

[thebookkeeperslibrary]

Lost Time: Ch. 3

Fandom: Time Warp Trio Author: The_Bookkeeper_96 Rating: T Summary: Another summer at Horae Manor begins, but before Joe and Tessa get the chance to train, they are sent out on a mission to explore the magic capital of the universe, Mancika. Rumors of illegal magic conversion spread throughout the city, and Joe and Tessa need to locate those responsible. But after the events of last summer, Joe isn't eager to work with his Aether partner, and the two are struggling more with each other than with their enemies. Read on AO3

Preview:

"It is important that every magic wielder identify their weakness. And then learn how to guard it at all costs." Principles of Magic, Chapter 6 by Flynn Alvaro

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Dinner had been long and silent. Seriously, I'd been in libraries that were louder. Fred had tried to lighten the mood with several bad puns and jokes, but it just made everyone even more uncomfortable. Sam, Arwen, and Juniper prodded Tessa and me for information, but neither of us was in a talking mood after everything we had just learned. We needed more time to process it all.

I had hardly touched my dinner, and I'm regretting it now. My stomach rumbles so loudly, I'm sure everyone in the room can hear me. Which included Cas, who's sitting next to me, and Tessa and Ro, who were on the ground about twenty feet below us in what looked like a large high-school gym. Apparently, this was the training room. Designed for all of our magical learning needs. It was hidden behind a door underneath the grand staircase in the entrance hall.

Tessa and I had been forced to come here after dinner. Ro and Cas didn't want to waste any time in preparing us for what was to come. Given that the fate of the entire space-time continuum rested in our hands, I don't blame them.

Fred, Sam, Arwen, and Juniper, on the other hand, had been told they could do whatever they wanted to do. Fred had followed Arwen off to a different training area, designed for those who didn't have any magical abilities. Sam and Juniper had wandered off to the expansive library. The girls didn't seem too happy to have company, but they couldn't exactly say no. So they were stuck with them.

"I really am sorry to drop all this on you and Tessa. But you deserve to know the gravity of the situation." Cas drums his fingers on the balcony railing as he speaks. "I'm also sorry that we have to force you into training so quickly, but Ro and I have an emergency council meeting tomorrow evening, and those things can last for days. So if we don't do this now, who knows when we'll be able to work with you."

"Right, the council…" I bite my lip and hope he doesn't ask how much I actually read of his books.

"Just how much of those books did you read?"

Damn. "Uh, well, you see, the thing is my normal school classes were really tough this year, and I didn't really get a lot of free time to do any magic stuff."

He tilts his head back and sighs. "Can you at least tell me what the nine magics are?"

"Um…" I scratch my head thinking back on the small amount that I did read. "Well, there's time and space magic, obviously. And the other seven are the magics of life, death, nature, mind, body, creation, and the elements." I sit up a little straighter, proud of myself for at least getting that much.

"Correct. But what are their proper names?"

"Proper names?"

He sighs again. I'm beginning to worry that he'll push all the air out of his lungs soon. "The common way to refer to the different magics would be to call them the magic of time or the magic of the elements, but in more professional settings the correct way to refer to them would be using their proper names. For instance, the magic of time is temporamancy. Space is aethermancy. Life and death are animacy and necromancy respectively. Elemancy is the magic of the elements. Mundumancy is the magic of nature-"

"Oh, yeah!" I cut him off, excited to remember something else. "And cephamancy is magic of the mind. While corpomancy is the magic of the body. Then the magic of creation is fabricomancy."

A soft smile plays along his lips. "Exactly. I'm glad to see you read the first chapter at least. Now can you tell me the origin of them?"

I press my lips together, mind racing to see what I know, but nothing comes to me.

Cassius leans forward, looking down at Tessa and Rowena who are talking on the ground below. I glance down at them as well. From Tessa's grumpy expression, I can tell she's not happy to be here. She looks up at us, at me. Her scowl lessens, but only slightly.

"This should be interesting," Cas muses.

"What are they doing?"

"A little magic practice. Rowena seems to think Tessa will learn better with an audience. We'll see how this goes." He nods at Tessa, still looking up at us. She gives him a terse nod in return and says something to Rowena before walking off to the far side of the gym. Rowena walks to the other side.

My gaze settles on Tessa as she settles into her spot. With a flash, her hands spark to life, bolts of purple electricity sparking between her fingers. A purple glow radiates out from her body like a second skin.

"Wow," I mutter, unable to help myself. She makes it look so easy.

Cas chuckles. "And that's not even the most impressive thing she can do. Now let's see how well you learn with a live demonstration."

My head turns sharply to look at Cas. He doesn't actually expect me to listen to him drone on about magic history while there's a cool magic show going on in front of me, right?

I'm proven wrong again as he takes a deep breath and begins, "There are currently nine known magics in the universe. All of these magics came from raw magic, the All Father's power. Raw magic still exists today, and occasionally someone will be born with the ability to wield it, but it is a deadly, all-consuming power."

"Can people choose their power?" I ask, already more interested than I expected to be.

"What? Not happy with your time magic?" He frowns at me.

"No! That's not what I meant. I just-"

"Relax." His frown lifts into a smile. "It's okay. No, there is no natural way for someone to change their power. The magic you have is the magic you're born with."

"Are there any unnatural ways?"

His face darkens. "No." The quickness of his response easily betrays his lie.

"But you said-"

"Joe." All traces of Cassius' usual warmth is gone. "I admire your curiosity and eagerness to learn about all this, but some stones are better left unturned." He ends the discussion with that. Before I can think too much about it, he returns the conversation to its original topic. "The first magics created were Time and Space. From Time, the All Father created Animancy, Necromancy, Cephamancy, and Fabricomancy. From Space, he created the other three magics."

"Can people with the magic of time or space use those other magics?" My thoughts trace back to last summer, when Cassius healed my wounds after we returned from Cealus. He'd said we both had healing magic, just not as much as actual Animantists.

"To a degree, yes." Cass nods his head. "Because of this Space and Time magic is considered to be a higher tier of magic. It's more complicated than the others, but this in no way makes us superior to them." He gives me a pointed look at that. "Despite what some people may believe. All magics are equal to each other. They are all important in maintaining the balance of the universe.

"You're job as the Warp Wizard, the job for any of the Greats, is to protect the balance of the universe. This task is especially important for the Warp and Aether Wizards because their domains are so vast and affect everyone." Cassius' hands light up with magic. He creates an orb of green light. The orb shifts and transforms into a yin yang symbol. "There is a balance in everything. And if the balance is disrupted, everything falls apart." The yin yang symbol dissipates into the air. Just as quickly as it disappears, a new shape takes its place. The forms continue to change shape as Cas speaks, synching up with the words he's saying. "Balance comes in many forms. Good and evil. Love and hate. Life and death. Even as the Warp Wizards, we cannot change the past or alter the future to our benefit. If someone we love makes a bad decision or loses their life, we must honor the path of time, accept what has happened, and move on as best we can. It is also our duty to ensure that everyone in the space-time continuum does the same."

I try my best to smile and keep my eyes open. Magic is just like sports. You have to learn the rules of the game before you can play, but the rules of magic are kind of boring. Surely as the Warp Wizard I would be able to have some fun with it. Maybe just go back and make sure I pick the right lottery numbers once or twice.

The death clock and its ominous tick flash before my eyes. Oh, right. The fate of the universe is in my hands. Maybe I should be thinking about all this a bit more seriously.

I look back down at Tessa, surprised that Cas has been able to hold my attention for so long. She hasn't moved, but neither has Rowena. The girls simply stare at each other across the vast floor.

After a long, tense silence, Ro shakes her head. With a sweep of her hand, she sends a wave of violet energy racing towards Tessa. She raises her arms in an X in front of her face. Just before the wave crashes into her, she slices her arms down, parting the wave with a small gap just big enough for her to fit through. She tumbles through the hole and rolls to her feet, ever the acrobat. Her sabre flicks out beside her. Cutting it through the air, Tessa is gone in the blink of an eye.

Rowena apparently anticipates this reaction. She moves her hands through the air, fingers forming strange shapes, almost like she's speaking sign language.

The room rearranges itself before my eyes. I try my best to keep up with the transformation, but I'm lost and confused almost as soon as it begins.

The gym is half the size it was a second ago. The ceiling is almost touching my head now. Cas has to bend over to avoid hitting it. "I hate when she does that," he grumbles.

When Tessa reappears, she is only five feet away from Ro. By the shocked look on her face, I can tell this is not where she wanted to be.

Rowena immediately attacks her, lashing out with her fists and magic. Despite her lithe build, she's able to put a lot of strength into her movements. I have no doubt that she could knock me out in one hit.

Tessa does her best to dodge the quick punches, sliding back and forth, arms blocking her face.

This only makes Rowena attack harder, adding magic to her punches. A purple glow surrounds her fists.

Tessa jumps back out of the way. She uses her magic to propel herself through the air and jumps farther than any normal person should be able to. She spreads her hands out, palms facing the ground, the purple glow returning to her hands. Moments pass, but nothing happens.

Rowena presses forward, the light in her hands growing more and more intense. She throws them out in front of her, sending a laser of space magic flying straight towards Tessa.

Just before it reaches her, Tessa flings her arms up, and a shield of magical energy shoots up from the ground. Rowena's magic bounces off of it, flying back at her. She has no time to turn it off or redirect it before it hits her square in the chest and sends her soaring back. Purple flames dance along the floor at the place of impact.

Rowena manages to get to her feet, and with a wave of her hands, the flames die down, leaving only scorch marks on the ground in their place.

Tessa lowers her shield, breathing heavily as she stares down her mentor, who frowns at her in return.

"That was not what you were supposed to do." Ro's frown deepens. The smaller space allows me to hear their conversation better than I could before.

"Hey, I won, didn't I? Don't be such a sore loser." Tessa crosses her arms and looks away. The confidence in her voice is contradicted by the guilt on her face. She knows she messed up, but she's too stubborn to admit there's a problem.

I wonder what was supposed to happen. It all seemed like an impressive display of magic to me. Tessa did technically win the fight. So what was the big deal? Was there a specific spell or trick she was supposed to do?

"This sounds like something you two should discuss in private. If you wouldn't mind?" Cas says to his sister as he points to the ceiling, which is squishing his hair flat against his head.

"Of course. Sorry about that." Rowena pushes her arms away and up and the room returns to its normal size so fast, it makes me dizzy.

"Now, where were we?" Cas straightens his spine and fixes hair. "Oh, yes, balance. One of the many forms of balance is the partnership between the Warp and Aether Wizard. Which is why it is so important for the two to cooperate and be in perfect sync. For centuries, two people from almost every generation have been chosen as the protectors of the universal balance."

"Almost every generation? Were some of them skipped?"

Cassius goes on, ignoring my question. An annoying habit of his I really hope stops soon. "The Warp and Aether pair are complements to each other. One will excel where their partner falls short and vice versa. For example, what did you notice when watching Tessa practice?"

I think for a moment. Tessa's movements were graceful, and she was confident in every step. "She acted like she was on stage. Like she never left the circus."

"Well, yes," Cas chuckles. "But what did you notice about her attack style? Or lack thereof."

I look back down at the scorch marks on the floor. Was I supposed to know stuff about attack styles? I think back to our run-in with the drake at Cealus. Tessa had run and let Arwen do the fighting. She had managed to make a maze to confuse the drake and get us safely away from the city, but she hadn't fought anything in the process. "She didn't fight back… or attack at all really. She just defended herself and waited for opponents to take themselves out."

Cassius grins, and I can't help but feel proud again at another correct answer. I didn't exactly excel in any of my normal school classes, so doing well in magic school felt pretty good.

"Precisely. Tessa's strength is defense. Which as you saw, is still a pretty good battle strategy."

"Why doesn't she attack? Can she do any offensive moves?" Battle strategy is a new subject for me. It's not like it's part of a standard school curriculum. But I understand football, and the two don't seem that different.

"Oh, she definitely can, but for whatever reason, she chooses not to. It's been a long-going argument between her and Rowena. Tessa refuses to let her full magic potential out. Ro and I haven't been able to figure out why." Cas pauses, tapping his finger against his knee.

I clear my throat, bringing him back to the present with a start.

"Right, so we know that Tessa is strong in defense but weak in offense. Even if we hadn't seen your impressive displays of power in the past, we could assume you would be very strong in offense."

"But I'm probably weak in defense then, right?"

He smiles at me. "Weaker than Tessa, but we can still ensure you know how to defend yourself. Something you're going to be practicing soon."

"How soon?" I jump up in my seat. Finally, practicing magic, the whole reason I came here.

Cas snaps his fingers, and the next thing I know, we're standing in the gym, right next to Tessa and Rowena, neither of which seems surprised by our sudden appearance. From this new perspective, the room seems a lot more like an arena than a gym.

I turn to Cas, eyes wide. Does this mean…?

"Now."

[meagan-marie]

Six Months at Riot Games

I’ve been up all night after reading Kotaku’s article on the company culture of Riot, and its effect on women in particular. Cecilia contacted me as a potential source, but I didn’t commit to providing my experience on the record because I was worried about the ramifications of speaking out. The discourse around this conversation and the reticence to believe the women who came forward has stunned me. I’ve been carrying around a heavy weight on my shoulders since 2014, and I feel it is finally time to let it go. I only lasted six months at Riot before resigning.

In 2014, I left a job I loved and colleagues I adored to take up a post at Riot Games in Dublin. One of their recruiters had reached out to me nearly a year prior, and while I was immensely happy at my current place of work, I had always wanted to work abroad at least once in my life. I was becoming addicted to League of Legends, Riot had a history of great community-centric initiatives, and I felt that if I turned down the opportunity, I would always ask myself, “What if?”

I was initially apprehensive, as I had been told firsthand that Riot could have a “bro” culture at times. So I did my research. I asked the recruiter directly about the mysterious “culture” of Riot, and why conforming to it was so important. I even messaged a handful of women ex-Rioters to ask about their experiences. They all confirmed that Riot could have a “frat party” type atmosphere at times, but didn’t relay stories of overt sexism or harassment.

I took the job in early 2014. I sold my car, packed up all my belongings in a shipping container, committed to a long-distance relationship with my partner, and sent my cats off for the mandatory 30 days of quarantine. I fully committed, expecting to work there for several years at the minimum.

Before I detail some of what I experienced at Riot, first, let me state the obvious. The behavior below is NOT indicative of all Riot employees. The large majority of Riot employees I’ve met have been lovely, and as evidenced above, there are many people who weren’t subject to sexist behavior and harassment. That being said, from my own experiences and that of many others speaking out this week, an unacceptable number of people – primarily, but not exclusively women – have been subject to inappropriate behavior at Riot for years. It is systemic to the company’s culture and needs to be addressed as such.  

I’ve outlined some of the most notable negative encounters with Riot staff below. These don’t account for the daily microaggressions and condescending remarks that are too numerous to detail. For transparency, being four years removed from Riot has not degraded my recollection of these events. I am drawing them directly from the eight-page resignation letter I sent to Riot in August of 2014.

Content-Warning: Sexist, racist, homophobic, and transphobic language, as well as mentions of sexual assault.

At Riot, employees are encouraged to play League before/after work, or during lunch. My very first week at the Dublin office, I heard shouting from individuals playing together, calling each other “f*ggots” repeatedly. I was unnerved, but it was my first week and I didn’t know if this was a common occurrence. I didn’t say anything at that time. Eventually, the language would escalate to “n*gger”. No one flinched, and I realized it was considered the norm. Nearly the same thing happened my first day of meetings at the Riot LA office, where two men were loudly calling each other “c*cksuckers” right outside the office of the CEOs.

Soon I began to notice gendered language regularly being used among male Rioters to insult each other. Guys would tell each other “not to be such a girl” and call one another “p*ssies” quite regularly. They would casually refer to women as “b*tches” and say that “all women were crazy.” I also overheard a group discussing how a female professional made it far in the industry, suggesting she ��sucked c*ck to get to the top.

My first month at Riot we had an opportunity to talk with one of the CEOs for an office-wide AMA. We were encouraged to submit questions anonymously. I submitted something that had bothered me for some time as a League player. I wondered why – other than the child characters and Yordles – nearly all the female champions had the exact same body type. The male champions were young, old, skinny, athletic, obese, handsome, monstrous, and more – they were unique and diverse. The most prevalent characteristic of female champions at the time was sex appeal. I wanted something more. I wanted to know when we would get a female equivalent of Gragas. 

The senior staff liked the question so much that they requested I ask it live, rather than anonymously. I was apprehensive at first because I was so new, but I also understood that this was an important opportunity to directly challenge someone in a position of power who could make a change. Unfortunately, the response boiled down to “giving the players what they want”, to which I rebutted that Riot was big enough to influence player perception of what characters are cool or fun to play. I was very disappointed by the response, which felt dismissive of the issue. (As a side note, I was happy to see Riot’s efforts to diversify their female champions these past few years.)

After the meeting, I realized I had put a target on my back with some of the men in the office. I didn’t even make it to my desk before a male colleague came up and told me that “women don’t want to play unattractive champions. They want to feel beautiful.” I was stunned. A woman behind us audibly laughed at the fact that he was informing us of our gender’s gaming preferences. A few male coworkers also asked why I would like to see an “unattractive” female champion, or a plus size female champion, because “no one wants to look at that.” These were several of dozens of conversations I would have on the matter.

Things only got worse the longer I stayed at Riot. I didn’t go out with colleagues after events because strip clubs seemed to be a common destination. Asking me what age I lost my virginity at was deemed appropriate conversation during a team dinner, and employees I didn’t know prodded into how my sex life worked in a long-distance relationship.

I felt out of place in my direct team as well. Our Jira sprints were named things like “thong.” I was the only woman on that particular team, and so a senior staff member named us the “Bros and Ho”.  I immediately tried to shut that down, but it was used for weeks regardless.

Rape became a punchline to jokes quite frequently, including one instance where an employee went on for several hours about how he was going to rape his male colleague, who was his hotel roommate. He was graphic in exactly how he was going to rape his roommate, who was a new hire, and it was obvious that the individual in question was extremely uncomfortable.

While on a team outing, the same senior staff member messaged a new employee’s girlfriend on Facebook asking if she was “DTF” - shorthand for “down to f*ck”. He thought it was a funny joke. The new staffer didn’t feel comfortable challenging him, even though his girlfriend was very uncomfortable and called to ask why she was being harassed by his boss.

Then came the final straw. At a work dinner, it came up that I thought I’d been paired in a hotel room with a male Rioter. It turned out to be a typo in the name, and, as was standard, I was paired with another woman. A senior staff member proceeded to repeatedly call me sexist for not being willing to room with a man I’d never met before. At first, I thought he was kidding, but he continued to make arguments to his point. I explained why I would be more comfortable sharing a room with another woman, and told him I wasn’t enjoying the conversation and would leave if I was continued to be called sexist. The conversation continued, with him eventually saying that my unwillingness to room with a man was the same as not hiring a woman due to her gender. I left the table in the middle of dinner, unwilling to take any more after six months of such behavior. I submitted my resignation shortly after.

My biggest concern with Riot – putting my own experiences behind me – is the inappropriate and sometimes predatory behavior that some staff exhibited towards fans. I frequently pushed back against comments and scenarios like these but found I was one of the few that would speak up. Rioters are often seen as celebrities with dedicated fans, and it is easy to abuse that power. 

I regularly witnessed lewd comments about women passing by at events, discussing their level of attractiveness, whether someone would sleep with them, and guessing if they were the age of consent.  

Several times I heard male employees bragging and sharing intimate details about hooking up with players at events, including a cosplayer we worked with in an official capacity. Several male colleagues even asked me to “hook them up” with cosplayers.

When I brought up the inappropriateness of a young League cosplayer having silly-string unexpectedly sprayed across her chest during a video piece by a third party – the gag being that he had ejaculated on her – I was told I was the “comedy police”.

I overheard at least a dozen employees comment on how cosplayers only make costumes for attention and ask “is this even considered a costume?” when a very famous cosplayer recreated a scantily-clad female champion. I showed them that she was one-to-one with the splash art. They begrudgingly conceded that it was an official outfit. This is obviously highly hypocritical.

At least three times Riot Dublin employees made inappropriate comments via work email about a female cosplayer’s breasts (one they regularly worked with).

While in LA, I had a week of very successful meetings with Rioters to help get a new cosplay initiative off the ground. In a recap meeting, I expressed how happy I was that we were creating such great programming for cosplayers. The senior most staff member responded with “Who wouldn’t want to work with cosplayers? Because Boobs.”

During one event, a first-time cosplayer came to our booth crying because someone had commented negatively on her weight in relation to the character. Another coworker and I consoled her for nearly 30 minutes, and she left, feeling much better. After she left, a fellow Rioter called her a “fatass” and asked why she would try to cosplay the character she chose. I was in shock but told him how inappropriate that was to say about our fans, especially those passionate enough to make and wear costumes. Cosplayers have also been called “tr*nnies” and “attention whores” by Riot employees at events.

In meetings, I was told that we shouldn’t put cosplayers on stage to play League live, because they are mostly women, and therefore not very good at the game.

Further examples of disrespect include when I argued that we shouldn’t let a cosplayer in blackface on our stage for a parade, keeping in mind that Riot is a global company. I was repeatedly called racist by my colleagues, who tried to convince me that it was an acceptable practice and I was overreacting.

This is not a comprehensive list. These were only the very specific examples I could draw from when I drafted my resignation letter at Riot. After word got out that I quit, I was contacted by several other women from the office, asking to meet. I was told more horror stories, discovering that some of them had been physically touched, cornered in shared vehicles, and faced professional retaliation for turning down advances. They asked for advice. I told them that they needed to speak up too.

The reason I didn’t share any of this before is because I felt trapped. I am not proud of myself for staying silent. After I quit, I was stranded in Ireland with my entire life in an apartment, no job, no car, and not even a cell phone, as it was immediately taken away from me once I resigned. I needed to get back to the United States somehow. Riot was my best bet, and I worried that if I didn’t agree to their mandates or went public with anything that I’d ruin my chance of getting home. After six months of near-daily misery, I was exhausted. I signed their agreements. I needed to get out. I recognize that I put myself at legal risk by disclosing my experience now. After years of regret and the thought that these practices could still be going on today, affecting countless others who also feel alone and outgunned by a company they were once excited to be a part of,  I am willing to take that risk. I want to work towards a better and more inclusive industry and show solidarity with the other women who have come forward.  

I left Riot feeling like a failure. I felt like I wasn’t tough enough to stick it out or make a positive change at the company.  I had been very public about my new adventure in Ireland, and all I could post about the return home was an agreed upon “culture fit issues’ statement to my social channels. Friends and followers could tell that something was wrong, but I couldn’t expand further.

To be clear, not everything from my time at Riot was negative. I became good friends with several of my co-workers and loved interacting with fans. Riot is a massive company that employs thousands of people. There are going to be women at the company who’ve never experienced sexism or harassment from their colleagues. I am very happy that they have found a safe working space with their particular branches or teams. That being said, these harassment-free experiences don’t invalidate the experiences of women like myself, and the dozens of others I personally met while working at Riot, who struggled with fair and respectful treatment on a daily basis.

The in-depth article on Kotaku and outpouring of other stories from both current and ex-Rioters finally gave me the courage to speak up, despite my concerns about professional or legal ramifications. I should have done this four years ago. I tried to facilitate change while working at Riot and after my departure. I’m hoping the groundswell of voices will now finally cause real, meaningful change within one of the most influential gaming companies in the world.

Two final notes:

To the many good eggs at Riot:  I’ve seen many of your posts. I understand your frustration if you have not been witness to this type of behavior, or experienced it yourself. That being said, you can support your company and the individuals who have come forward. Your anger shouldn’t be directed at the subjects of this abuse and maltreatment, but rather the individuals who perpetuated these acts in the first place. Please keep an eye out for your peers, and hold others accountable for their actions.

To young women hoping to work in gaming: Gaming can be a tough industry, but please don’t let conversations like this drive you away from pursuing your passion. The more we dissect and discuss these situations in a public forum, the more steps we take to making the industry a more inclusive place. As tough as gaming can be, it is equally welcoming and rewarding.

[shadowluverworks]

Remissionem - Chapter 1

Finally getting to post this! If you guys would rather read it on archive, fanfiction, deviantart, or inkbunny, you can find it under the username: Shadowluver1242

Special thanks to @galoots for reading through and editing this! Read the story below.

The Wound A Word Opens

           Scrooge McDuck: the richest duck in the world. He has more money than one could ever dream of, and he made it square. On top of being a businessman, the duck’s a world-renowned explorer. Solving mysteries and rewriting history is his pastime, and his family shares in the love of adventure...that is, all but one. Donald Duck is not as graceful as his uncle, not as smart as his twin, and much more prone to getting hurt than having fun. After losing Della to the call of the great unknown, his view of the “family business” soured even more. However, his three nephews, Della’s kids, have shown the same passion their mother and great uncle shared. After many deliberations with himself, he finally conceded in allowing the triplets to accompany the entrepreneur in his travels.

           There were, of course, strict rules to follow. Donald doesn’t just give the responsibility of his nephews’ lives to anyone. Even with his inhibitions, he relinquished his family to Scrooge McDuck. Heaven help the old miser if something were to happen to those three. Donald had already lost one family member too many, and he’s determined not to lose another.

           The sailor had made a personal vow of no more adventuring. Those days were long gone for him. He had never felt as much of a rush and received such enjoyment out of it as his kin did, which is why he’s currently relaxing on the hammock of his house boat. His family has another journey planned for today, but rather than worry about them returning safely, as he usually does, he attempts to keep his mind at bay with a nap. But fate never seems to be on Donald’s side, and at a loud shout of his name, he’s awakened by the thwack of his face meeting the boat’s wooden floor.

With a groan, he rubs his head as his eyes open sleepily. In front of his beak are spat-clad feet, and he doesn’t need to guess twice to know who’s interrupted his beauty sleep, “Scrooge?” He sits up with a scowl. He should ask why the old duck is on his boat, but then again, his boat is in Scrooge’s pool. Feeling rather agitated at the rude awakening, his mood is more combative than normal, “What do you want?!”

The Scottish duck pushes away the slight pain in his chest at the absence of ‘Uncle’ before his name. That’s been increasing in regularity ever since the events of the Sunchaser. Maybe his nephew had only been referring to him as that in front of his great nephews all this time? After his reputation had been dirtied in their eyes, Donald has been more frequently dropping the ‘Uncle’ and simply calling him ‘Scrooge’. He despises that.

But that’s not what he’s here for. Ever since the Shadow War and nearly losing his family for good, he’s been trying to rekindle the relationship long lost between him and his nephew. It’s been a rocky road at best, and the two of them have been known to lose their tempers at a drop of a hat. So today he chooses to keep the smile on his beak as he addresses the duck kneeling before him, “Came teh invite ye. Teh kids ‘n ah thought it might be fun teh have a sort of...” he waves a hand around, trying to come up with the words, “...family adventure.”

He can feel his fight or flight instinct kicking in. Scrooge is skilled at many things in life, talking to his own kin, however, was a skill he did not possess. Part of him wants to run and pretend he never asked while the other is still hopeful his nephew will accept his offer. Though the rather confused look that comes over Donald’s face as he stands up does nothing to soothe the old duck.

The sailor crosses his arms in front of his chest, “You know I don’t adventure anymore.” He looks his uncle up and down. The old man is good at hiding his feelings, but Donald has known him for years.

Scrooge was obviously nervous, “A-Ah knoo, but, well it’s just been a long time since ye’ve gone ‘n...ah jus-”

Donald holds up a hand to stop him, “I don’t adventure anymore because someone always gets hurt.”

His uncle blinks as he turns away to walk out onto the deck of his houseboat. He’s not surprised when he’s followed, “Thas’ nae troo! We’ve bin on several trips now ‘n everyone always comes back in one piece!”

Donald leans over the railing and looks over his shoulder at the other, “In one piece, yes, but I have to take care of the bumps and bruises!”

Dark turquoise eyes flick away at that. Sure, there are small injuries here and there, but no one had lost a limb or worse! You can’t live if you’re afraid to get hurt! In the past, Donald had been the one to sustain most of the injuries, and perhaps that is where the insecurities are coming from now. But the boys are skilled where their uncle is not. They take after their mother and himself. But then even Della had...

Scrooge frowns at the duck across him, “Thas’ part a teh fun! A bruise ‘r a scar lef’ behind tae remind ye of teh adventure when ye got it! Ye’ve got tae make memories while ye can, lad! Besides, those wee boys are much more capable than yer givin’ them credit fer.”

Donald’s eyes narrow and he straightens, glaring at the other, “I know they’re capable, why do you think I let them go with you?!” He can’t protect them from everything, they would never live!

His uncle’s brows furrow, bringing a hand to his chest, “Donald, ah knoo ye worry fer them, but ye can-” Scrooge cuts himself off, his eyes lower to the boat floor. He can’t finish that sentence because it’s not true.

But his nephew knew what he was about to say, and it only seems to stoke the sailor’s internal furnace, “I can what? Trust you?! I think you’ve made it very apparent that I can’t!” Scrooge’s eyes lift to glare at his kin. His instinct is to defend himself, but he keeps his beak shut for once, jaw clenching.

Donald continues in his fit, “The only reason I let the boys go adventuring with you is so they can get it out of their systems. So that maybe they’ll grow bored of it while they’re still young and can move on with their lives before something terrible happens! I know they’re already better at it than I was because they still actually want to go. They’re only ten years old, but I trust them and their decisions in this! Do you know how sad it is that I trust children more than I trust the adult in charge of them?!”

For a long time, Scrooge knew how Donald felt deep down, but hearing it so blatantly out of the young lad he raised, that all faith in him was lost, it stings. Like many times before, Scrooge abandons any hurt feelings in exchange for anger. His teeth grit as he takes a step forward, “At least when teh boys are with me, a successful businessman, they might learn a thing er two on how tae supply fer themselves once day instead a livin’ on a boat in their uncle’s swimmin’ pool and moochin’ off his hard-earned wages!” He wanted to take that back as soon as he said it. He knows more than anyone that even if Donald was lazy in nature, the duck had tried everything to hold on to a job to support his family. It wasn’t for a lack of trying, he would take any job if it meant providing a safe environment for the boys to grow up in.

Scrooge’s outburst was out of line, but he can’t take it back. Especially not with the hurt expression that quickly flashes across his nephew’s face. Though it’s instantly hid behind anger once again, as their family is known to do. Donald’s fists shake at his side, but he doesn’t blow his top. Instead his voice lowers to a mock calm, “Really? Alright. Why don’t I just see how much they’re learning, then?” With that, he gives his uncle a shoulder shove out of his way and marches off the boat, shouting, “I’ll get Launchpad to move the boat back to the marina after!” over his shoulder. The old coot wanted a family trip? He’ll get a family trip.

As the sailor enters the mansion to most likely cut through and get to the front yard where Launchpad and the children were waiting, the rich avian allows his face to fall in shame. This is not the way to repair the bond with his kin and he knows it. He hadn’t meant a word he said; Scrooge didn’t want Donald to leave, quite the opposite actually. He scolds himself for letting his anger once again take control of his tongue. This adventure is no longer sounding as fun as it did a few minutes ago.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

           Donald mostly ignores what exactly the treasure they’re after is. Most likely something gold and cursed if he knows his uncle. It had been several hours since their argument this morning and they both had time to cool down, but neither made a move to apologize. They mostly avoided one another.

The Duck’s and McDuck’s are good at arguing, not so much at having heart to hearts; a trait that Donald has attempted to break in his nephews. From a young age he made sure to talk out any disagreements with the boys, whether between they and him, or among the triplets themselves. Kids can hold onto grudges, but Huey, Dewey, and Louie had always been inspiring at resolving their fights before it ruined any relationships.

           Scrooge had not been raised that way. He had, in a sense, raised himself since the age of 13, and, knowing nothing about being a parent, had raised Donald and Della from a young age as well. Della had always been better at talking about her feelings, but it wasn’t the same for Donald, at least not with his uncle. He’s learned a lot raising her sons, but the way the relationship was severed between his uncle and he is something not easily mended.

Donald sighs, his glance once again settles on the old duck. They had pushed their anger away for the children, not wanting to bring any negative feelings to the adventure. Webby and the triplets crowd around Scrooge’s seat next to Launchpad in the cockpit of the Sunchaser. He’s explaining the history of the location and what they’ll be looking for, but the sailor isn’t listening. His mind is years away in the distant past when he and his twin had the same wide and excited eyes the ducklings now have. Where had the time gone?

When they arrive several hours later at the ancient Mayan Ruins in Central America, the crew managing to escape a water landing by a feather’s length, his uncle takes the lead through the deep jungle while he brings up the rear himself, leaving Launchpad and the plane behind. They have yet to truly enter the temple ahead, but small native structures could be seen rising and falling through the thicket. The trees above them grow together so close in their canopy, only small rivers of light can be seen cascading through the leaves and lighting the world around them.

The dirt path they’ve taken eventually turns to a stone one. So battered is the path, that the stepping-stones are often broken or missing in places. Small green flora has managed to take root, and they rise up a few inches out of the small cracks of earth the pathway gives way to.

The group hikes for a few miles before the trail leads them to a small mountain, or rather large hill depending on how you look at it, gradually rising them higher out of the undergrowth. Huey occupies himself with identifying different plants, animals, and insects they pass along the way, while also keeping a sharp eye out for any poisonous ones. Webby next to him is jabbering about the native culture and history of the ruins around them.

Louie trails behind, just in front of Donald. He wipes the sweat off his brow as his bangs cling to his face; he should have packed a t-shirt. The humidity is suffocating, as if you can take a handful of the air itself, and the heat draining. You can practically feel yourself becoming dehydrated. He doesn’t know how the others can manage so well.

Dewey stays closely behind his great uncle, wanting more than anything to swing through the trees on vines and cut his way through the vegetation. Scrooge had strictly advised against such acts however, insisting he would lead the way on this expedition, and that everyone was to stay behind him. The kids have noticed his behavior is a bit off today, but don’t bring it up.

           The old duck grits his teeth. Curse the arthritis in his hips. The pain in his legs had started this morning after his and Donald’s argument, and had seemed to only get worse the farther he traveled. He’d hoped moving would bring some relief, however it only increases the closer they get to the temple. It was almost as if his experienced body is giving him a warning. But that’s ridiculous; surely, it’s just one of the many days when his age is making itself known to him. Nevertheless, he’s being extra cautious today just to be safe, especially with his nephew keeping a close eye on him.

He’s sure he’s slowing the group down with his sluggish pace. He hates the fact his cane is proving to be more and more necessary. Most days he has no symptoms whatsoever, and finds little use for it, but then there are days like today when he doesn’t know if he can remain upright without the extra support. Scrooge shakes his head to focus on the task at hand; he can’t let himself be distracted, that’s when someone can get hurt, and that’s not going to happen today.

The group has reached a rather open area, making him take pause. To their right, more jungle reaching up and over their heads as the hill continues upward. To their left, an unnaturally clear view from the trees that shows how high they’ve already climbed. A gravel-like hillside drops abruptly to jungle nearly a hundred feet below. Off in the distance you can barely make out the bright light of the sun reflecting off the metal wings of the Sunchaser in a small clearing near the lake. More jungle filled mountains continue for as far as the eye can see.

Ahead of them, the path leads to a stone door with a rather threatening face carved into it, a trademark symbol of the natives that used to inhabit this land. The door is attached to the beginnings of the temple; however, hundreds of years have made the living forest become one with it, and most of the structure is covered under vegetation. It looks as if it was built into the mountain itself. The entrance lays about a hundred yards yet ahead of them. The senior duck’s eyes narrow; something isn’t right. Everything is too perfectly cleared away.

           Donald hasn’t been watching exactly where he’s walking. The sounds of the forest have distracted and brought him back to adventures of old he’d shared with his family. Looking to his right, his attention is further distracted by a blue morpho fluttering about before silently landing on a native flower blooming on one of the many trees. He hasn’t noticed his uncle and the kids pause at the clearing, that is until he collides with his elder.

The old duck is pushed a few feet ahead and nearly collapses with a wince when the stone he steps on suddenly lowers underneath his weight. The switch seems to have activated a centuries’ old booby trap, as massive boulders are swiftly released up in the hillside to their right and swing on their ropes tied to the tree tops above them. Four stones in total, each twice the height of Scrooge, sweep along the path in front of them, swinging back and forth and threatening to push them over the edge.

           The experienced avian sends a glare behind him, hands on his knees as the sudden movement sent a wave of pain through his body. A pink flush blooms across the younger duck’s face as he gives a grin and a shrug accompanied by a small giggle in embarrassment.

Louie rolls his eyes, “Great! Now what?”

His older brother garbed in blue smiles at him, “Aw, come on! It’s not so bad! We’ve had worse death traps than this!” As if to prove his point, he runs ahead of the group towards the first swinging rock. Pausing to watch its movements, he waits until it just passes in front of him before running quickly to the next safe spot between the first and second boulders. He turns around to his family with a triumphant grin, “See? Not so hard!”

           The other three children and their elder move to follow him, leaving his uncle behind. Donald takes a few steps forward to where Scrooge stood but a moment before, watching his family wait for the rock to swing ahead of them. He holds his breath to keep himself from yelling out as his anxieties surface.

Now that he was focused enough to observe the awkward landscape before him, the layout makes sense as the death trap revealed itself. The boulders are supposed to crush any potential robbers and send them flying through the sudden break in the tree line down to their demises on the jungle floor, or at least that’s the idea. Donald can only picture tiny duck bodies soaring through that very air and meeting an unfortunate ending, but his family runs past the stone, and quickly joins Dewey on the other side. He releases the air in relief. This is why he doesn’t go on these trips, they are far too stressful for him now with the children along.

           As he attempts to calm his racing heart before his family goes to the next stone, a distinct snapping makes him whip his head up to the jungle hillside next him. It sounds as if young saplings are breaking. The sound catches his uncle’s attention as well, making him pause as the kids continue onward. Scrooge’s fingers grip tightly to the cane he leans on, the pain has come to an all-time high; something is definitely wrong. Donald’s eyes widen as his body is rapidly dwarfed in comparison to the fifth massive boulder hurdling down the hillside towards him. The overgrown jungle must have temporarily kept the stone at bay before crumbling under the weight.

           Time seems to slow down, and yet it all happens too quick for anyone to process. Instead of feeling the rough surface of the boulder making contact with his face, Donald feels two distinct hands push his limp body a good five feet away. The duck grunts as he bounces and slides across the rough surface before quickly turning his head back. He stares unblinkingly as a nauseating thud enters his ears, a body flying lifelessly through the air to his left and down to the hillside. Rocks slide along with the figure as it rolls along the rock face before falling down the drop-off into the trees, snapping branches and vines under its weight. Birds flee the scene up into the sky and other wildlife run to hide from the sudden noise before the form finally lands on the ground out of all their view.

           Then all is quiet. The branches shake back and forth, before stilling once again. The forgotten fifth stone swings unaffected, as if it didn’t happen. Donald makes eye contact with his family ahead who stare in equal horror back at him. It feels like hours pass as they process what had just happened, all staring back at each other as the once life filled jungle is dead silent. Finally, it seems to hit them all at once, as they stare in the direction the body flew before crying out in shock, “SCROOGE!”

~~~~~~~~~~

           Donald never remembers running so fast. After the kids made it safely past the swinging boulders, the five of them run down the hillside as quick as their legs can carry them. Huey’s shaking voice tries to determine if someone can survive such an ordeal. Louie’s sobbing, repeatedly screaming, “He’s dead, he’s dead!” Dewey remains silent as the scene replays in his head over and over, tears stinging at his eyes.

Webby is the only one who seems to keep it together as she makes the group stop on the path to catch their breath; they’re all hyperventilating. She grabs Louie by the shoulders and gives him a good shake, “Louie! He’s not dead! We’re gonna find him and we’re gonna get him home!” The boy sniffs in response but says no more.

Donald can see the girl trembling. He’s the adult, he’s supposed to be calming the children down and making a plan to help their uncle! But at the moment, he feels like he might vomit. The sound of Scrooge’s body crumpling under the weight of the boulder still stuck in his head. He no longer feels like an adult, he’s a scared child. He simply exists alongside the kids.

Webby forces Huey to stop his dead-end rambling and focus with a smack across the face. The red garbed boy seems a bit hurt by the action, but he pushes his feelings away for the time being, and determination enters his eyes. Together they track the trajectory to locate where their uncle’s body could have landed. Finally pinpointing the most probable location, the group runs once again. Leaving the path, they venture into the deep thicket. Dewey leads the group, moving branches and leaves nearly as big as him out of the way for his followers. He’s not sure what else he can do, he’s not as smart as his older brother and Webby. But he can at least clear a path for them. It’s a while before anyone says anything, the only sounds to be heard are the twigs breaking under their webbed feet, and the still quiet sniffs of the youngest triplet.

They spot something up ahead. Donald feels himself run faster, ahead of his fellow ducklings. There’s a small clearing where broken branches lay scattered across the ground. One limb, still attached but hanging, swings back and forth melodically. The sun shines through a small break in the trees from its missing appendages down to the forest floor. All Donald can see is red.

A broken and crumpled body lays entangled with vines and branches. The family pauses in shock, taking in the scene before them. Their uncle’s body is motionless, his clothes in shreds. His top hat and spectacles landed relatively close together a few yards away in the tall undergrowth; his cane a few yards on the other side of him, hooked on a low branch. His feathers, once as white as freshly fallen snow, now a dirtied mix between brown and red. So much red. Donald’s heart sinks.

[erenthecoordinate]

Hi! Any thought on the chapter?

I don’t have a whole ton to say about this chapter, honestly, it was a conveniently paced setup chapter.  We got a couple significant reveals, potential foreshadowing, and an epic cliffhanger.

To touch up on the latter, a number of people believe this is the climax of it all and that we only have several chapters until the finish.  Personally, this feels more like a buildup to the bigger, ultimate climax.  Business needed to be taken care of with Marley first.  The true happening is solving what happens to Eldia(ns) in the long-term.  I was hoping for more answers regarding Eren, but it seems we’ll have to wait an action sequence before we get his internal insight on anything.  There is still some stacked-on evidence of his intentions though, and I don’t think that should go unnoticed.

It is kind of a no-brainer that Pieck’s intimidation tactics to get Eren to submit wouldn’t work out.  At this point, Eren is confident (maybe too confident) that no one can afford to kill him without a fight.  And he sure as hell would put up one.  She decides quickly that her better option is to appear desperate for his cooperation to take down the nation that had devastated the island in the first place, and that he in turn infiltrated back.  This isn’t the first time we see Pieck so easily put her hands up and appear harmless, of course, but she makes it convincing enough where Gabi is questioning where her loyalties lie.  Interestingly, much of what she is saying in regards to her opinions of Marley is genuine, but that doesn’t mean she sees Eldia’s Paradis as allies, much less Eren.  So, props to Pieck for her deception and information prodding.

Between Eren and Pieck, Eren is one with little words and feigns ignorance to a lot of her questions.  He obviously knows why Zeke has the abilities he possesses, and quizzes Pieck to see how much she knows.  It is clear neither trust one another, but it makes we wonder if Eren would actually consider allying with another warrior if they were interested in aligning with his plan.  I don’t think he intended to ever believe her seeing as how he braced himself for a fight and stood quite a bit away from Pieck and Gabi when he asked her to point her comrades out.  It just would be interesting to see if he would at all.  Guess we’ll never know now.

I see you’ve taken some lessons from Annie again, Eren.  I wonder if we’ll ever see what object he is using in his pocket.

Anyway, with the two’s conversation, some things were revealed.  Eren is aware of the spinal fluid that’s in the wine.  He is likely aware of who drank the wine or at least who would be at risk. That said, I’m not entirely convinced Eren initiated or advocated for this wine plot to happen, and am better convinced by a theory that implies there was more forward planning before his (willing or unwilling) participation.  Maybe I’m just thinking the better of Eren, but that’s just what it seems to me. 

 Pieck believes Zeke’s words to Eren on the roof were true, that this was the most genuine he had ever been toward anyone.  Pieck is painted as a very perceptive person, so I’m inclined to agree with her.  

Before the action, though, a quote that has sparked a lot of discussion is what Eren says to Yelena in regards to Pieck trusting them.  Yelena is sure that Pieck is deceiving them and Eren agrees that she is not trustworthy, apparently much like “another woman.”  [Note: More officially, it’s actually “that woman”] English has this statement translated as if there is another woman who is not to be trusted.  But, can refer to Yelena being the one not to trust Pieck.  Or…that Pieck is the one not actually trusting them.  Or…well, it’s complicated.  Japanese readers are still confused what exactly Eren is talking about and people are guessing that there is not much meaning behind whereas others are thinking that Eren is talking about someone not on-scene.  Isayama just managed to pick the vaguest meaning of this sentence and it’s suspiciously convenient that it’s within a conversation about trust.  

Personally, I’m bouncing back and forth between believing it’s just him referring to Pieck not trusting them after all or that he is talking about another woman they cannot trust, whether he means someone non-present.  There aren’t a lot of women in the cast (sadly) that may spark the latter point.  The only one I can think of is Kiyomi, which is entirely possible.  Mikasa and Historia being regarded in this way don’t make sense.  Regardless, the way it is worded in a confusing manner was intentional, or at least I’d like to think so.

It’s also neat to point out that this is the first time we see Eren and Yelena actually interacting that isn’t a flashback.  I wonder how their demeanor normally is around each other.

Really quick, I’d like to appreciate a couple glamor shots of Eren looking intimidating and angry.  Even if this is the only mood he is emoting this arc so far, it’s refreshing to see him break from his barely phased and unreadable demeanor.  At least I have NO question why Eren is upset!  And he’s gonna be shoeless in shorts after all this.  Wow.

Side B to the story is the 104th and Sasha’s family (Nicolo, included) in their cell.  I guess it’s relatively…generous that they were given supplies to eat, drink, and keep heat while behind bars?  

Armin and Mikasa recall Eren’s hostility toward them and very quickly Jean asks what went down.  When Connie brings up that Eren has become a different person, effectively a piece of shit friend, Jean isn’t entirely certain about it.  Despite how hurt they are, he reasons that, once again, these actions wouldn’t be made by a sane Eren without a reason behind it.

We’ve seen quite a number of people bring up that “no, this is not like Eren” as a means to analyze his current behavior, and I believe even the flashbacks and Eren’s lack of input in the grand scheme of things (aside from what other characters are saying), are meant to tell the reader to stay tuned, Eren may not be how he is projecting himself to be.  How much longer until the truth?  Well…probably another volume, who knows!

That said, it’s understandable that Armin and Mikasa, despite having grown up with Eren and experiencing his changes, are most shaken and uncertain.  Eren’s hostile words towards them hit a personal note and attacked their identities.  He made them doubt themselves and that makes them doubt their support for Eren. So Jean reiterating that this is unusual behavior and it can’t be taken at face value has them consider for a bit.

Yelena finally comes to talk to the 104th in their underground prison.  Naturally, the group is confused by what is going on and demand answers.  Before that though, we get some more blatant racism targeted at Sasha (who is dead, what a low blow!) that Yelena is quick to shut down.  I don’t trust Yelena but I’d be lying if I didn’t feel like this guy deserved it.  It may have been an excessive action, but it’s true that you probably don’t want a guy sputtering insults at the people you are still trying to win over.  Also, what a dick!  You’re just as bad as Floch last chapter!

Also we learn that Onyankopon isn’t as innocent as he claimed to be...

Or at least, on the surface.  He still seems uneasy whenever he is around Yelena but more talkative around Hange, so I’m wondering how deep their loyalties lie and whether or not these two are cooperating to push forth their own separate (but symbiotic) agendas.  As we see not even a minute later, no one would want to be caught on Yelena’s bad side anyway.  Oof!

Afterwards, she reveals the plan to the group and they are all taken aback by the euthanization add-on.  Yelena confirms that the idea to pass down the Beast Titan down to royalty and the Coordinate to another series of chosen successors, as well as threatening the world with the Rumbling by initiating a small scale test run, were still part of it.  Historia’s pregnancy and getting Zeke to the island was no big surprise to them considering upper military branches and the government were willing to chance the event.  It appears, however, that not everyone was involved in Yelena’s full agenda.  Although Nicolo served the wine, he had believed Yelena and her circle of allies were more interested in securing the island to rule and destroy Marley as revenge.  Yelena assures that this isn’t quite the case and the action they are taking is for the benefit of Paradis and all Eldians alike.  At this point, it’s hard to imagine she is lying anymore (although, I don’t doubt there is some revenge seeking on her part).  She has little reason to when those who would want to stop her are behind bars.  And she doesn’t personally dislike them.  In fact, she is more than happy if they “understand” her.  Armin is “moved” to tears actually.  Of course, as far as Yelena knows, Armin isn’t one for master manipulation.  Mikasa, on the other hand, knows better.  Connie and Jean are more shocked, but I’m inclined to believe it’s because they noticed Armin suppressing laughter before crying (yes, it is laughter).

I know there is debate on what this all means.  Did Armin finally crack?  Is he actually moved by Yelena’s motives?  Is he just expressing all the pent of emotion he has carried for a long while only to finally release them when the truth of it all comes out?  Or…most likely…he has figured something out and the crying itself was a cover up.  Either he thinks the plan is so outrageously NOT Eren that his doubts are being relieved or the plan is in general so outrageous that there has to be a way to stop it and well, since it’s Armin, there is definitely something cooking up in there.  Once this is all over, I think he does need an actual good cry, though.

What I predict in the next chapters is, of course, more action.  I think Zeke is bound to arrive at some point either as a cliffhanger for ch117 or sometime within the battle.  Whether he and Eren come in contact to put an end to Marley’s remaining forces depends on what damage they can do to the non-Eldians.  The wine drinkers are suspiciously all together, after all, not far from the invasion.  I think the 104th will be able to break free somehow and arrive at the scene.  To do what, I’m not entirely sure.  But I think we’ll get a final verdict on whether they will decide to support Eren again or leave him to his demise.  I have reason to believe they will forgive him if they feel like his actions aren’t an actual danger to them, albeit not that they would be as close as they were before ever again.  Something’s got to give at the end of this frustrating mystery, right?

Again, I’m probably too hopeful, and I don’t think any BIG answers will come until after this battle.  In fact, I’m really anticipating more “villainous” demeanors from Eren that will either confuse people or have readers believe he really is totally gone.  But we are getting our final Reiner v Eren fight and I’m QUITE excited about this!

Not a really long reaction.  A good chunk of the chapter was people deceiving each other and the playing “can I trust you?” game.  Needless to say, I don’t think anyone really trusts each other.  Well, except for Pieck and her comrades.

I miss those moments from the alternative perspective...  :(

Thanks for the question!

[natashabarnes]

To preface:  Avengers: Endgame shook me to my core and I needed to find a constructive, healthy way to talk about what I am feeling and this seemed as good a way as any. This is an endeavor seeking emotional intelligence. So I’m here to talk about how media can affect us, honest-to-goodness grief, and yeah sure, my opinions and most importantly, Natasha Romanoff. There will be spoilers, obviously. You’ve been warned.

It’s late afternoon on Friday, May 7th, 2010.  I’m a super-soon-to-be-college-graduate, and I’ve just missed my bus home.  There are few places grimmer than where I currently found myself: the Inter-City Bus Terminal in Reading, Pennsylvania. The good news was that buses from Reading to New York ran roughly every two or three hours most of the day, I was going to be fine. I was going to be late, but I was going to be fine.  At the risk of sounding dramatic, I didn’t know it but I had a date with destiny that evening. Since I couldn’t imagine sitting around and waiting in a bleak af bus terminal, I sought refuge a mere block-and-a-half away at the R/C Reading Movies 11 & IMAX. Lucky for me, I was able to schlep my suitcase and (always) large purse over right in time for a showing of Iron Man 2. I remembered Iron Man (2008) to be a whole lot of fun so I sprung for a movie ticket to be able to watch most of Iron Man 2 before I had to catch my bus.  I knew nothing about this film going in and I was having a good time up until the moment Scarlett Johansson came on screen as Natalie Rushman (who even me, a noob S.H.I.E.L.D./espionage sector of Marvel, knew was actually Natasha Romanoff, aka the Black Widow).  Once she made her entrance into Tony Stark’s personal fitness center, I wasn’t having a good time, I was having a great time…and also a weird time.  I was in complete awe of her; I hung on her every word, her every move.  Everything about her radiated a sense of intelligence, purpose, intention, and most alluring to me, confidence.  Looking back I realize I was seeing the kind of woman I wanted to be; not only did she have every trait I wanted as a person, she seemed to be this unattainable personified perfection.  At the time, I wrote off my fascination with her pretty quickly as the voice in my head said “but you’ll never be like that, you know that, right? You’ll never have those things.” I had to leave to catch my bus just as Rhodey showed up to Justin Hammer’s Stark Expo presentation and at the time that was pretty much that.

Let’s skip ahead.  It’s the evening of Wednesday, April 24th, 2019.  Thanks to the kindness of my best friend/basically sister, I was able to see Avengers: Endgame a day early.  I’m a mess.  I’m soaking wet from the collar bone up and my eye makeup is every place on my face with the exception of my eyes.  I’ve been sitting for over three hours and somehow I’m out of breath, my sweat is cold. My status of Full Blown Mess was credited to the fact that I had to watch Natasha Romanoff die violently, fiercely, and courageously.  The shock I felt that night was all-consuming.  I kept saying to my friend through hard sobs, “I just thought she’d be safe. I really thought she’d be safe.”  So many people I know at this event found me after the fact to check in with me.  Am I okay? Do I need anything?  The only answer I came up with on the fly was “I will be, it hurts now. But I’m just…so proud of her.”  More on that later, but basically, people were so kind and if I had to be a mess, at least I was among people who also cared and understood where I was coming from. While my friend engaged in a last bit of work for the day, I sat waiting, attempting to calm down by staring at costume designer Jany Temime’s recent Instagram post where she selfied with Scarlett expressing excitement about working on the upcoming Black Widow film. I reminded myself that this night was not goodbye, just a very jarring “see ya later.”  Of course the present is not necessarily made easier to bear just because more (and potentially the best) is yet to come.

What a difference nine years made.  I’d gone from casual move-going fan who’d only read Spider-Man comics when I had time to being a hardcore, ride-or-die fan of Marvel Comics and the Marvel Cinematic Universe. My library had grown exponentially, along with my knowledge of these characters, and let’s not overlook my closet’s growth after falling into the deep pit of cosplay. I can’t exactly put my finger on the “when” of it, but at some point I stopped stifling the portion of my heart that belonged to superheroes and let them take over with complete abandon.  I’d always had a heavy habit of trying to be what other people wanted me to be.  Though I may have lived very independently, in retrospect my choices and interests were so often chosen for the satisfaction of other people (I am not assigning blame to anyone but myself on this one). Superheroes serve as a perfect example of a passion of mine I chose to shut down for so long. Once I leaned into that passion, I felt so much more complete.  It’s no surprise that Natasha Romanoff was the character I ended up being most passionate about.  

Natasha is a strong woman who spent a lot of her life in the service of others across moral and political spectrums.  She followed their orders always and has plenty of regrets about her past.  Maybe I was self-projecting, but throughout my dedicated years as an MCU viewer and Black Widow comic reader, I always saw Natasha’s arc as two parts:

1) a woman coming to terms with what she’s been and what she’s done seeking to move forward in a more universally beneficial direction.

2)  a woman learning who she is, what she wants and choosing to act of her own volition.

Obviously the two are deeply connected. While her past experiences may have made her moral compass more grey than that of her peers, she’s a woman who wants the Right Thing To Do to be the choice she makes of her own agency.  There’s a beautiful deleted scene from Captain America: The Winter Soldier where Nat speaks to Nick Fury for the first time in confidence after discovering he faked his death and did not include in on the secret.  “I needed to keep the circle small.  You would have done the same thing,” he says.  “I know,” she replies, “that’s a problem.”  A scene she has with Steve Rogers discussing trust that made the final cut achieves a similar idea.  In past appearances in the MCU, Natasha had expressed a desire to make amends for her past and seemingly had started to do so through her work with S.H.I.E.L.D. and her participation the Battle of New York.  These moments in Cap2, as the fandom frequently refers to it fondly, are less about her outward actions and more about her inward struggles. What she seems to learn by the end of the film is that letting people in is a key part of her goal of a truer sense of self.  By the time we meet her in Captain America: Civil War, within the first hour of the film she delivers one of my favorite quotes as the family around her begins to split apart, “Staying together is more important than how we stay together.”  Nat’s journey continued to be one of finding self-possession, self worth and using that greater sense of self to give back to others, both the found family around her and the innocent she can protect.  

With all of this in mind, Avengers: Endgame is my favorite MCU film and features my favorite Natasha Romanoff content we’ve seen so far.  From the moment the film begins, she is a woman hell-bent on remedying the greatest tragedy in the history of the world.  Long gone is the woman we met in her first two films who did the bidding of an organization and/or focused mainly on giving back to those she felt she owed. In Endgame, Natasha aims to save the world, to bring back everyone lost, to restore families.  We first see this when she agrees to find Thanos with the team and reverse the snap. When that mission fails, we skip ahead five years and that’s when I personally really lost it. In five years, Natasha has never stopped trying to fix the world. Let’s be clear, every other member of the original six Avengers most definitely has stopped trying to find an antidote to The Thanos Problem.  Sure, Steve is trying to fix things in a different, more practical way, but there’s still an acceptance of the circumstances in his actions.  The sight of her alone broke my heart and filled me with a sense of honor.  This is a woman we have always seen in control and put together and when we find her she is a noble, beautiful wreck. She’s abandoned most self care, wearing only her depression clothes, and surviving off hope and peanut butter sandwiches desperately communicating with allies around the universe. These people make time for her but are clearly losing patience with her and her insistence that not only can this be fixed, but that it is all of their responsibility to do so.  And in case it wasn’t obvious enough how much she’s changed, this scene gives us what I believe will be (for now at least) Nat’s most iconic moment on screen.  “I used to have nothing, and then I got this…this job, this family.  And I was better because of it.  And even though they’re gone…I’m still trying to be better.”  Nat sums up her entire character arc in this one delicate and stunning moment showing just how strong allowing herself to be vulnerable has made her.  Loving has only made her braver, caring has only made her more tenacious, and giving has made her unstoppable.  She is, in this moment, the woman she always wanted to become.

Remembering the aforementioned scene is absolutely necessary when absorbing Natasha’s choice later in the movie to sacrifice her life so that her team can get the soul stone.  Her entire life has lead her to this moment. Yes, killing off the only female from your original team is a bold move with a LOT of weight attached to it, and one that can definitely be seen as shortchanging her, but I just can’t see it that way. Natasha Romanoff made the ultimate heroic choice, one that the rest of the film hinges on.  My brain can’t navigate the concept that fans have been robbed of her unnecessarily without also hearing a diminishing of the selfless choice she made and the course she followed in the time we’ve known her and beyond.  It’s only when I think of the alternate concept of Clint dying for the soul stone that I feel completely, hypothetically swindled (though while we’re talking about him let’s also not forget how excellent it was to see a man and a woman with no blood relation platonically love one another unconditionally).  Please don’t misunderstand, if you are angry, I respect that, we all deal with stuff different ways, this is just my take.  Natasha Romanoff earned that moment.  Is it devastating to watch? One thousand percent yes, but what I felt even more deeply than the devastation was pride.  I am so proud of this character that in no way can I bring myself to see this choice as abuse or mistreatment of her character.  In that moment, she was magnificent.  Natasha Romanoff died valiantly, unafraid, and of her own free will so that everyone else could live.  Natasha is a hero of the highest standard, full stop.

Entertainment Weekly recently featured a half-hour interview with the original six Avengers to promote Endgame. I was more than moved to hear Scarlett speak about Nat’s arc and confirm what I’d been absorbing as an audience member for years.  “She’s come into her own as a woman saying ‘who am I and what do I want and what do I need out of my relationships and also out of my own self’ and she’s someone who is understanding her own self worth.”  Without going into deep detail, watching Scarlett’s performance as Natasha has affected me in a way I can only describe as profound.  Every MCU film she appeared in had at least one moment that hit a nerve inside me in ways equally gentle and harsh, but still every nerve was hit with the reassurance of knowing that if she could change, I could too.  Catalysts for personal growth can come from anywhere and at my most lost somehow I remembered that moment sitting in a theatre watching Iron Man 2.  Something in my brain told me to follow that feeling I had watching her, not in an effort to emulate her completely, but to see an example of someone one who is “my own woman–first, last and always.”  Natasha taught me that self love, self worth and opening yourself to others are traits more powerful than lightning, stronger than a suit of armor and they’d protect me more than a shield.  In the years I’ve watched and read this character, my life has changed for the better in every way.  She’s been a gift to me and the gratitude I feel is overwhelming.  I may have saved myself, but Natasha taught me how.  As fans I think we all love having more media to look forward to, especially when that media features an inspirational figure for us.  Before Endgame I’d frequently have passing thoughts reminding me that someday the time of Scarlett’s particular incarnation of Natasha will be over.  Who would I be without this character? After Endgame, I’m less afraid of that future.  No matter what form of this character I will have in my life, I will always follow her example and I will try to be better.  

[cosmicflowchart]

Stefan’s Favorite Ending [Request]

“Fic idea: Stefan can see all the possible timelines and has to decide for himself what ending he'll choose.” Summary: Stefan remembers every ending--and there’s one he particularly likes. Requested by: Anonymous Warnings: dissociation, multiple timelines, surveillance, references to control by external forces, drug reference, memory loss and sudden return Word Count: 1474

“I’m trying again,” is the last thing Stefan tells his father before he storms off. He knows he’ll forget what just happened soon, but before that happens, he pulls out a pencil and paper from his pocket and scribbles, “Accept TS Offer--BAD END.” Then everything goes black.

With a gasp, he wakes in his bed again. He’s not sure why that still scares him. It’s not a particularly invasive song. Not like the records Colin had him pick up for “inspiration.” He can’t remember the song titles after waking up, nor can he recall who Colin is. To be honest, he’s not sure where those thoughts are coming from, but they sure are invasive. Much like this song, ironic and too upbeat for his current mood.

He sits up, head foggy and eyes glazed over. As he wakes more, something’s tickling in the back of his mind. This always happens when he wakes up: he remembers that he’s forgotten something. Of course, he doesn’t remember what he’s forgotten, just that he has. It’s starting to get on his nerves.

The tickling becomes an urge. He swipes his hand under his pillow, and it brushes up against something hard yet small. His hand comes back out with a small notebook. He doesn’t remember it being there before.

Curious, he opens it.

Well, it’s his handwriting for sure, but again, he can’t recall ever writing in this. It could be an impostor, or stalker, he surmises based on his confusion. But as he reads through it, something in his mind struggles to be heard. It doesn’t get louder than a whisper. The notes contain references to “endings,” one being particularly large. It spoke of a bad end from accepting an offer from something called “TS.” Or someone, he adds.

At the very end of the notebook, there’s a note in someone else’s hand. Even an exhausted Stefan wouldn’t have doctor’s handwriting as bad as this. And yet...it’s familiar in the way that an old novel off your grandparents’ bookshelf is familiar, even if you’ve never opened it. It’s deja vu but it can’t be that he’s held this before.

Stefan mouths the words in the note.

Call me when you’ve explored every path. Colin.

Beneath it is a number he thinks looks familiar. He flips back through the notebook. What could he be missing? Why is this familiar to him?

Suddenly, the words all click. Endings. Like the book Bandersnatch. It’s in his writing, so it’s him. It’s perhaps another version of him, maybe another dimension or lifetime (or path), but it’s still him. He’s recorded every single ending.

The more he reads, the more it comes back to him. Meeting Colin Ritman, shaking his hand, “we’ve met before,” buffer error, The Bermuda Triangle, Jerome F. Davies, that documentary from Colin, dropping acid, P.A.C.S., his mother, his father, the glass cigarette holder, the fucking cereal. He remembers every choice, every song, every death...and more importantly, every end. What happens right before he resets. That’s the most important thing. He remembers those moments.

Stefan presses his fingers to his temples, as if to hold it all in. The notebook falls open on the bed in front of him. The writing’s too small to read from this distance. His hands fall to his sides before pressing into the bed.

“Don’t try to stop me, alright?” he almost yells at Netflix. “I remember it all. You can reset me if you want.”

He waits. 

He doesn’t wake up again, just sits there. 

He lets out a breath, eyes scrunching closed, and he climbs out of bed to get ready.

Once dressed, Stefan finds himself drifting downstairs to the phone. He’s vaguely aware of his father, who chirps a calm, fatherly “good morning” before disappearing from the room. He punches in the number, despite having left it upstairs. Something in him just knows. At this point, he doesn’t care that this is all just happening. He has to talk to the one person who understands this.

The phone rings three times before the recipient picks up. “Ritman residence,” drones a familiar voice. “Make it quick.”

“Colin, I’ve explored every path,” Stefan wastes no time. He’s worried for a moment that this will reset everything. When it doesn’t, he visibly relaxes, letting out a sigh.

“Are you absolutely sure, Stefan? Did you get the secret ending?”

“Which one? The weird dial-up noises on my Walkman, or the death by Jerome F. Davies?”

Colin chuckles. “You’ve got them all, then. Well done.” Stefan doesn’t ask, but he wonders how Colin knows all of these endings. He wasn’t there for all of them. “Well, mate, now that you know all of what’s in store for you, here comes the fun part. You get to decide which one fits you best.”

Stefan blinks. “But I’m not in control.”

“That’s right, you’re not, but now you’re exactly like me: you can see all possibilities. You know everything that’s going to happen. Feels nice, doesn’t it? Feels powerful, and yet you feel powerless. Like playing a video game.” By the end, Colin sounds actually excited, not in the way he was while telling Stefan about Pacman dying repeatedly, but in a new way. Stefan wonders if this itself is a path he hasn’t done before, but he pushes that thought away.

“A bit. But, but Colin, what do I do now? I know all this, but I, I don’t know how I’m supposed to use it.”

“You remember how you finally figured out Bandersnatch had too many endings, so you limited the options for the player?”

“I do, yeah.”

“You’ve got the knowledge. You’ve fought back before. So whoever’s controlling you…”

“My friend from the future.”

“Do you know they’re your friend?”

“Well…” He looks upwards, knowing that his controller can hear him. “They wouldn’t get through all of these endings if they weren’t at least curious. I’d hope they were my friend. They’re the only thing consistent in my life. Besides specific events and people, obviously, but even when those change, my friend stays the same. I think. It helps to have something to look forward to. And now that I know they’re there, and we both know what’s in store for me, we can get even closer.”

“Fair enough,” Stefan can hear the grin in Colin’s voice. “So then comes the question: which one’s your favorite? I don’t want to influence you by revealing my own, but from a design perspective, there’s a few good ones. Not all climactic, but still decent. There’s that fucking true end too, which is great if you’re a writer but--”

“Colin,” Stefan cuts in, “I don’t mean to be rude, but you asked me a question. Can I answer it?”

“Yeah, of course.”

“I like the one where I learn the truth about Netflix, and I fuck up Dr. Haynes’ day good and proper.”

Stefan’s giggling at the memory, and Colin laughs as well. “Shame I’m not there for that one. I’d love to see you do that. Does your friend make you fuck her day up?”

“Yeah, they, uh, they make me throw coffee at her, and then my dad comes in and I fight him too. It’s wild, yeah, but, but even though there’s a few different versions, I still like that one. No one dies. I get to meet you and everything’s cool...and I don’t have to worry about the game.” He stops. “Maybe that’s it. If I’m stuck having to program this game...I like the ending where it doesn’t matter anymore. For a little while, I’m free from it. I can just concentrate on what’s wrong with my head. And I get to shout out my friend instead of just being scared of them.” His friend makes a noise of approval. “What about you?”

Colin pauses. “It doesn’t matter. But I appreciate you asking anyway. I do like the endings where you try to do good. Never works, obviously, but it’s still nice.”

Stefan’s dad comes back down the stairs, gesturing at his son. “Sorry, Col, my dad needs the phone for a work call,” Stefan twirls the cord nervously. “Sorry to interrupt you.”

“No worries. There’s always a chance this could happen again. See you in the next lifetime.” He hangs up, and Stefan hands the phone to his dad.

He walks back to his room, looks to the ceiling, and says: “I’d kind of like to do that fight ending again, if you don’t mind.” A little smile comes over his face as he adds, “Friend.”

Stefan wakes up with a start, but this time, he’s smiling. Whatever the person controlling him tries, he knows which choices will take him to his favorite ending. And he’ll force himself to get there if he has to.

A/N: I took a bit of liberty with the request, sorry if this was too far off, anon. If that wasn’t your fave ending (any of yours), I totally understand. I admit to some personal bias on that front. (I also considered doing a ‘choose your own ending’ version where Colin responds differently, but I wanted to keep it short and simple. Ish.)

[thesportssoundoff]

So Who Replaces The Count?

Joey

May 30th 2018

First we can begin with what I figure is a fair yet short talk on "The Count" Michael Bisping. There are a hundred different words to describe Michael Bisping's legacy and they range from as sterling as the label of pioneer to as damning as simply referring to him as an asshole. If I had to find a single word to describe Bisping, I'm pretty sure I'd go with professional. In a sport where everybody from promoters to the fighters seems to be rife with amatuers getting the Peter Principle treatment, Bisping was a rare pro's pro. He never missed weight, he took fights all over the place against anybody offered him, he kept himself in shape to be able to fill in at any time, he always seemed mentally prepared for every fight he was taking and even if Bisping didn't always win, you never had a fight where you felt like he didn't give himself a chance to win. Even if Bisping was all sorts of limited athletically, his cardio, pacing and fight IQ always gave him a shot against any opponent. Put this way; here were the first five TUF season winners at the start of 2018:

Forrest Griffin- Retired Diego Sanchez- Active, on a two fight losing streak, 2-3 in his last five fights Rashad Evans- Active, lost four fights in a row Joe Stevenson- Trying to salvage his career outside of the UFC Michael Bisping- Former MW champ in 2017, two straight losses to guys in the top 10 Kendall Grove- Trying to salvage career outside of the UFC Matt Serra- Retired Travis Lutter- Retired Nate Diaz- Retired?

Most of them are out of the sport, some of them are scrapping to try and stay alive in MMA and some are just trying to hold on for a little bit longer in the UFC. As amazing as it sounds, guys like Rashad Evans and Diego Sanchez have just been trying to hold onto whatever remains of their relevancy. Michael Bisping headlined the biggest PPV of 2017----and then took a fight a few weeks later for the fuck of it. That was also the first time Michael Bisping lost two fights in a row which speaks to his absurd consistency and longevity. Not bad for a dude who I think most of us would consider limited athletically. Also worth pointing out that DJ Mikey B had his career renaissance with just one eye as well after Alan Belcher damaged it with an inadvertent eye poke. Bisping was even a professional asshole; a dude who understood how to promote fights and be the heel that MMA needs sometimes. Bisping's resume is highlighted by his insane win total, the TUF win and his KO over Luke Rockhold---but the one thing I hope he's remembered for is how he embodied professional fighting in so many different ways.

Having said all that, let's chit chat about what you need to remember about Michael Bisping and what the UFC is going to miss going forward. Of  Michael Bisping's last 10 fights, 9 of them were main events and only 2 were in the US. Bisping was Mr. International and the sort of fighter the UFC could use to either break into new markets or just guarantee fans a main eventer of consequence. He was a reliable headliner for free TV at the very least and his truest value may have been as a Fight Pass star for international fans. That's a lot of main events to make up, especially internationally. Who can the UFC turn to be the next big UK Star potentially? Well let's look at some dudes (and a lady!) who might be capable of filling up that spot:

1- UFC WW Darren Till

This is the easiest of the choices possible and the one that seems the most likely. In six UFC fights, Darren Till has headlined twice, both overseas. Till is really young, has weight division versatility at WW or MW and he is probably the best fighter out of the UK now that Bisping has retired. Till has the Bisping personality (although his shit talk seems more matter of fact and less humorous) and he's building himself up a crazy fanbase. Darren Till is the best fit for the spot but ironically enough, he might be TOO good. Bisping was always consistently above average (minus his second half career renaissance around Thales Leites) whereas Darren Till already has wins over Donald Cerrone and Wonderboy on his ledger. Dana has already said his next fight is going to be in Las Vegas so clearly Till's going to get his first real test outside of the United States. If Till turns out to be a draw, he's not playing around in the UK. Conor McGregor only headlined one time out in Ireland before it was straight up Vegas and MSG. Darren Till's talent might prevent him from being the next Bisping.

2- UFC WW Leon Edwards

After nine fights in the UFC, almost primarily in Europe, Leon Edwards gets the opportunity to headline for the first time in the UFC against Donald Cerrone in Singapore. Edwards is under 30, he's fought plenty of times in the UK and he's the sort of guy who has earned his reputation by virtue of a tremendous glut of wins against good enough competition. It's taken a long time for Edwards to get his first main event which kind of is the problem; he's really nondescript. He's showcased some good wrestling but not great, he's had some pop in his hands but nothing recently, his fights are prelim memorable but not exactly the sort of fights you'd show to your friends. He's another one of these really good WWs who just doesn't generate any sort of excitement. If it was about results, Edwards would be a lock but unless he wow's vs Cerrone, this feels like a case of "We needed a guy" and not a case of any genuine enthusiasm for his future.

3- Cage Warriors FW Paddy Pimblett

Paddy "The Baddy" Pimblett is one of those fighters who I have a tough time figuring out. I've watched him fight about five times in Cage Warriors and I still don't quite know what he is. Maybe it's the Marc Diakiese effect where a fighter who seems to have serious issues often getting fights where they need to be leave me on edge. Be that as it may or may not be, Paddy is already a big star in Cage Warriors, a Liverpool native who has tremendous character and some absurd grappling chops. He's one of those guys who "gets it" about how to promote and market yourself. He's not perfect but I suppose that's part of the charm. Paddy opted to re-up with Cage Warriors in March so he'd be a ways away I suppose from getting the call. Pimblett has a lot of Michael Bisping in him but again, there's some Diakese here.

4- Bellator WW Michael Page

Currently the attention of Bellator's next big free agent is Michael Chandler which is understandable. Talent at 155 lbs like Mike Chandler, still technically in his prime-ish at 32 years, are wanted on the open market. The reality though is that if I had to choose between two fighters with one fight left on their deals, I'm not entirely sure that Chandler would be the guy I'd want. That would probably have to be Michael Page even with the concern. I know Michael Chandler will be a decent LW in the UFC (maybe a little better, maybe a bit worse) whereas MVP could be the best WW or the worst WW. The pacing of his career suggests he's not going to be there---but if the UFC is looking to replace Michael Bisping, you'd HAVE to want to be in on MVP. He's a "star" in the UK, he's loaded with personality and while we've seen him put up stinkers time and time again; he's the sort of dude who has the ability to be a Vitor Belfort who lives off of the highlight reel. They'd have to sign him away from Bellator obviously but we can't let facts get in the way!

5- UFC FW Arnold Allen

There's something very Ortega-y about Arnold Allen. The late comebacks are obviously a part of it but there's something to be said about a guy who always seems to find a way to win under any circumstances vs opponents who are worlds higher in rank and stature. He's really flawed but I stop assuming guys are lucky and stop figuring they're bound to find a way to lose after their third "How'd he do that shit?" win. I don't know if Allen will ever be a superstar but he's young, he's talented, he has a knack for pulling off miraculous wins and he's cutting his teeth in a ridiculously tough division. It's worth noting that Allen has a checkered legal past (a bar fight where he apparently either hit a woman or was defending his girlfriend depending on who you ask) and we saw Jimi Manuwa struggle to get fights outside of Europe because of that.

6- Women's boxer Nicola Adams

By all accounts Adams is an MMA fan and considered making the move over to MMA at one point. It may be worth checking in and seeing just whether she'd reconsider that. She's obviously not a sure bet to develop into a "star" and at 35 she's a weathered athlete BUT wouldn't you rather take a chance on someone like this knowing what the upside could be? Even if you have her for 3-4 years before she retires, you're still getting arguably one of the greatest women's athletes you've ever had.

[thenerdytomboynewb96]

Samantha Allan Park Ch. #45

Any references to TMNT or anything from popular media and culture is NOT MINE. I only own my OC's. Any references to “TMNT Out of the Shadows” DO NOT BELONG TO ME. Only my additions that I came up with myself belong to me. Anything from the films or other series ARE NOT MINE, only my OC’s and my ideas that I have added onto the story FOR FUN. Thank you.

Chapter #45

*The same day, Monday June 8th, 2015. A little after 12:50p.m. in the lair*

The fight had ended at 12:50p.m. The turtles wanted to head straight home, but Sam knew that she couldn’t run from Chief Vincent forever. Her turtle brothers however were not going to allow her to turn herself over so easily. They convinced her to at least return with them to the lair and have a full on discussion with everyone who played a role in the events that had occurred that day.

When the group of 5 returned to the lair, they met up with April, Casey, Jay, and Vern. All three men instantly began talking about how ‘badass’ they were during their fights (after Jay rushed over to hug his sister, while also mildly panicking at her injuries, and then further checking to make sure she was truly okay). Jay and Casey talked about how they teamed up and out-smarted the giant mutants they were up against, and Vern was thrilled to announce that he had taken out a Foot soldier all by himself by jumping down from a large freight shipping crate. While Raph was impressed with what these guys had accomplished, he was getting fed up that Sam kept standing up from her chair and that he had to keep gently pushing her back down to stay seated. She had stood up for the 5th time by the time he was fed up and was ready for the conversation to get back on track.

“Alright already! You guys did great, and we appreciate it, but can we please talk about how we’re going to handle THIS?” he emphasized as he shoved Sam back down into her chair for the 6th time. Sam plopped down and groaned as she leaned back in her chair and crossed her legs. “Ughhhhh can I please get up so I can use the bathroom?” Raph crossed his arms and looked down at her. “I don’t buy it” he huffed. “Raph, the main bathroom is right around that corner. She’s knows that if she tries to leave that I have access to all the tunnels traps right here” Donnie said gently (but also in a tone so that she knew that even though he was facing Raph he knew Sam would get the hint). “I don’t want to escape, I just wanna pee!” Sam whined, her face literally on the table as she leaned forward in her chair. “Fine” Raph gave in. Sam then quickly scoot back in her chair and rushed to stand up. She made sure to glare at Raph before she practically ran towards the bathroom. “Don’t give me that face!” Raph called after her. “If you don’t like my face then look at my ass!” she retorted. Mikey quickly cupped his hand to his mouth to hide his laughter, but Raph smacked him across the back of the head anyway. “My sister everyone” Jay said as he shook his head and laughed. “So, you guys knew she would have turned herself in back there to, huh?” he asked. The four sighed and slumped down into the remaining chairs at the table. “If we hadn’t boxed her in then she would have walked right over towards Vincent without even thinking about it!” Donnie scream whispered, slamming his pointer finger into the table as a means to emphasize his frustration. “We have to come up with something” Mikey said softly with saddened eyes, “we can’t just let her throw her life away.” “Casey, what are the odds of Vincent meeting with Sam and discussing everything that happened the other night and why she attacked the police the way she did?” Leo asked. Casey bit his lip and rubbed his hands down his neck. “Before tonight I would have said she didn’t have a chance at all for that to happen, but after seeing how you guys saved the city and possibly the entire world, she may give her a chance to explain. I can definitely talk to her, and Jay, April, and Jade can aide me as well. If you’re willing that is” Casey said as he now turned and faced April. The woman began nodding her head as soon as she heard her name. “Of course. She’s been through hell, and Vincent needs to understand that before she makes her final decision in how to deal with Sam.” “So it’s settled,” Raph added, “we keep things down low and avoid telling Sam because who knows what she’ll try to sneak by us. You guys talk to Vincent, we keep her busy down here until the time comes for Sam to meet with the chief.” “She has to rest up anyway. Her shoulder needs to properly heal, and her hands were cut up pretty badly as well” Donnie added. “We’ll use that, and also testing out her powers as reasons as to why we want to keep her down here.” “One more thing” Mikey added. All eyes were now on the youngest in the room. Leo couldn’t explain it, but somehow he knew just what his baby brother was going to say, and he agreed with it wholeheartedly. “Whenever Vincent decides to meet Sam, we HAVE to be allowed to join her. The two don’t meet in any way unless the four of us are right behind her” Mikey demanded, using his hands to speak the same way Donnie had. Donnie and Raph looked at their youngest, and then right towards their oldest brother. They waited for him to state why this was a bad idea, but Leo just shrugged and smiled. “Couldn’t have said it better myself” he chuckled.

Just then Sam had exited the bathroom. She looked up and could tell that everyone was purposefully making sure to avoid eye contact with her, which obviously meant that they had all been talking about her. She rolled her eyes as she continued to walk towards the table. “Geez, you use the bathroom once and you turn into Medusa” she stated as she walked back and slumped down into her chair. “Well then you should be honored to see yourself as such a lovely lady” Mikey said cheerfully, thinking he was complimenting his friend. Sam squinted her eyes and formed an odd smile as she turned towards her friend. “Mikey, who’s Medusa?” she asked. He shrugged. “I dunno, some goddess right?” Sam nodded. “If that’s all you know, then I’ll take what you just said as a compliment” Sam said with a smile. “Exactly!” Mikey announced, crossing his arms with pride.

“Well we don’t want you turning men into stone so you’re going to relax down here” Jay said as he pat his sister on the shoulder and stood up. “Saw that coming” Sam mumbled. “And hey look at this” Donnie said as he held the girls hand to her face, “you’re also injured! And this isn’t your only injury either! So that means you get to head over to the med lab. Looks like you were staying here anyway” he said with too much enthusiasm as he pulled Sam along with him, even if she was groaning all the way.

With that, the turtles gave Donnie space to check on Sam (who ended up nerding out as Donnie tested some of his latest medical tech on her). Each of the remaining brothers went off on their own for a while. Meanwhile, their human friends up above were working towards arranging that meeting like they discussed. Sam had no idea this was in the works, and that’s just how they wanted it to be. Jade and Casey talked to Vincent first and provided evidence (with Jay sharing his own personal stories as well) as to how Sam ended up in her current situation. He included details of how they grew up and the tragedies they faced and how that led her to the turtles who had continued to help straighten her out. April also joined in and explained the turtles back story (after gaining permission from the turtles and Splinter to do so) and helped fill in missing details about what had happened that the turtles cared for Sam so much, why they were working together to break into headquarters that night, and why Sam had reacted the way that she did. After 4 days of discussions and research on the events that had occurred recently, Vincent finally decided that she would meet with Sam with the turtles behind her.

*4 days later, Friday June 12th, 2015 at 9p.m. at Police Headquarters. The hallway right outside the chiefs office*

The group of 5 were updated that Vincent was willing to meet with Sam and that she was kind enough to let the turtles accompany her. However, the turtles needed to remain silent and let Sam do the talking on her own. If they wanted to remain in the room with her, then they needed to remain calm. She wanted to meet with them in a private location where she could record the conversation, so she made arrangements for the group to meet her in her office once the sun would be going down. She sent the majority of her officer’s home so that the group would have the walk of the building without exposure of being seen by new faces. So here they were. Sam was sitting calmly outside the office. The brothers…not so much.

Raph was pacing as he always did, crunching a hand weight as he did so. Leo kept tapping his feet. Donnie was holding a small cellular device in his hand which he kept tapping against the palm of his other hand. Mikey was constantly twiddling his thumbs together. Sam was about to say something to them, but Jade had interrupted her thoughts as she carefully exited the office. “The chief is ready to see you now” she stated. The four boys shot right up and got into their typical formation: two brothers in front of Sam, two brothers behind.

The group entered the office. The boys stood a little further towards the back while Sam took a seat in the front. She was hooked up with patches and wires in order to conduct a lie detector test. The man reviewing the results was a member of the NYFS who had already seen the turtles before and had sworn long ago never to reveal a bit of information about them to anyone. Chief Vincent smiled as she noticed how the boys were respecting her wishes. “The four of you may sit down as well. I said you couldn’t talk over top of her, I didn’t say you had to hide yourselves.” The four nodded and then assumed their same positions. Mikey sat on Sam’s left and Leo on her right. Raph sat behind Mikey, and Donnie right behind Leo.   “So,” the chief said as she stared right at Sam’s eyes, “I’m going to run through things from the very beginning, and I’m going to ask you some questions to see if they match what other voices have told me.” Sam was silent, but she nodded to show she understood. “What happened July 28th 2010?” Sam pursed her lips together before she spoke. “I lost everything, everything except for my brother.” “How?” “The Foot. They killed everyone.” “Who-” “My siblings, my family” Sam cut in. Vincent nodded her head. “I see. And you were 12 at the time. I can see how that would lead you to lash out and commit the crimes that you did” Vincent said as she held her hands together on her desk. “I see you’ve been looking at my record” Sam stated. “You have a record?” Mikey asked, slight shock in his voice. His eyes went wide and he then turned towards the chief. “Oh, I’m so sorry-” “It’s okay. Obviously your friend never told you about her criminal days. I’d advise you explain your thought process now.” Sam gulped and sighed. “You know how I bring you guys with me to explore the city? Well, it took me a few tries before I became good at it.” “Oh” the chief said with wide eyes, “you’ve included them in your breaking and entering?” Now Sam was starting to get pissed. She responded with more sass and attitude than she had meant to. “Yes. Because my family was dead, my brother was never around because he was being manipulated to work for the Foot, and every friend or anything close I ever had completed abandoned me because they knew why my family died but decided to hide the truth from me until it almost ruined my life even further. So yes, when you have nothing to look forward to, you find something that makes you feel alive again, something risky that makes you feel like you’re fighting back even though you don’t know what you’re fighting for, something that-” Just then she felt a hand from each brother on either her arm or her shoulder. She closed her eyes and didn’t open them until she had calmed herself down. “Yes. I snuck into places because I had nothing, and that’s what gave me purpose, like I was looking for any type of sign. Eventually that lead me to these guys, and for once I had something to look forward to.” “And that was?” Sam looked the chief right in the eye. “Living life to the fullest with my family.” Vincent couldn’t help but notice the small smiles that were being fought to be kept hidden away from the brothers as they listened to the girl talk. “Well, it seems these four have helped keep you out of trouble at least since after those 4 incidents of us catching you breaking into various buildings, the only things we have left on your record are all your different therapy sessions. Besides for medical and academic records, nothing comes back up under your name until last summer when you apparently joined the Foot clan. Explain that to me.” Leo and Mikey sensed Sam clenching her fists under the table. She was obviously growing frustrated from having to discuss some of the most depressing and most difficult times of her life all at this one very moment. “My brother told me to leave the city and run away because Shredder wanted me as a recruit. But I knew that leaving would lead to Jay’s death, and I wasn’t going to let that happen.” Chief Vincent tilted her head to the side. “Why exactly did Shredder want you of all people?” “Look at who’s sitting around me” Sam said matter of factly. She felt a light nudge by Leo, meaning she needed to politely answer the question again. “Shredder found out I was friends with these guys, so he demanded that I either come work for him, or Jay and I both perish. At the time plans were already being made for a rebellion to occur within the Foot clan, so I joined thinking I would be in and out quickly. Unfortunately I was in there for an entire month before the plans were put into action.”

“And that’s where these four come in, right? You became closer to them because they helped save you and everyone else.” The room was silent as everyone waited for a remark from Sam. Without moving their entire bodies, the four brothers slightly turned so they could look at Sam, confused and worried at her long pause. Finally, she figured out how she wanted to respond. “It…it was a lot more than them just showing up to save me…” she muttered. She then looked up and saw that based on the chief’s expression, she was obviously waiting for Sam to elaborate on that response. This was all really beginning to stress her out. Every dark turn her life had ever faced was being relived right now, right in this moment, and it was beginning to pull her into a brand new dark hole in itself from the upsetting emotions she was experiencing. She then felt Mikey place his leg right next to hers, and even this gentlest type of physical contact brought her back to reality. “I had just gained their trust, they had just started seeing me as family. And what happens? They see me working with the Foot clan. They felt betrayed, I felt like an idiot, I got into a fist fight with one of them and could have possibly killed him, and then the rest told me to leave.” All four brothers looked off to the side, remembering these dark days and regretting so much about how everything was handled. “All in all, I betrayed my family and once again I felt like I had lost everything. So when they showed up unexpectedly, it changed everything.” Sam then looked back up at the chief, hoping she had said enough to answer the chiefs question, and she could tell by Vincent’s expression that she had done so. “Alright. So explain to me how you gained these powers then. What caused them?” “A mix of Shredder’s experiments and also me dying” Sam said straightforward. This caught the chief off guard. “Excuse me?” “Oh, you didn’t know? Shredder was constantly testing mutagenic chemicals on humans and-” “Not that. You, you died?” “Oh yeah. Saving this one” she said, shaking her hand with her thumb pointed towards Mikey, who looked embarrassed as he was being pointed at. “But it’s okay because he used a special type of mutagen that brought me back to life. It gave me powers in regards to controlling and manipulating wind while also giving me enhanced strength. And yes, that’s what you saw at headquarters the other night, an example of what those powers can do-” “Objection!” Donnie interrupted, the thoughts in his head overriding his actions. His brothers were all staring at him with wide eyes, hoping that whatever he had to say wouldn’t get them or Sam in trouble. Sam however was smirking as she turned around to face Donnie. “Objection?” she asked. “Um, I just had something to add, if that’s allowed” Donnie stated, attempting to sound confident as he first looked at Sam and then at the chief. The chief nodded. “Alright, go on.”

“Sam gained her powers because of the mutagen that was injected into her body due to circumstances involving her time with the Foot, but we’ve been monitoring them as best as we can. We’ve learned a great deal about how they work and what she is able to do with them, but we also just recently learned that this mutagen zones in on the users temporal lobe in the brain, meaning it can affect memories and emotions. So when she attacked the other night at headquarters-” “It was out of her control” the chief interrupted. “It’s obvious she has an emotional connection to all of you, so based on what you just said, when her family was threatened she took action.” “Couldn’t control the action at the time” Sam mumbled, “but I can now. I would never harm anybody like that on purpose.” “How do you know your emotional senses are now stable?” the chief asked. “She controlled herself during our fight with Krang” Leo added. “Mikey got caught, but Sam controlled herself and helped us save him, rather than letting her protective emotions take over and just act without thinking.” ‘So she was with them’ the chief thought to herself. She was still curious and a bit worried about what risks the girl in front of her could cause to the city, but it seemed she was with a crowd that could maintain control of her. This played a major role in the chief making her final decisions about what to do with Sam.

“Alright, so here’s the deal” the chief began, “we have records of Sam, and we have records of you. Sam’s were already on file, but all my information about the four of you is pretty new. I’ve seen video files that were hidden away from the night the Foot fell, and many ex Foot in the NYFS told stories of how they were stopped because of you guys and how if it weren’t for you, Shredder would have gotten away with a lot worse in the past. As for you” she said as she now stared directly at Sam, “while you have a record, you’ve experienced things that no person should ever have to go through, let alone a child. I’m not saying that makes your early actions okay, but I see where your mind was. That and the fact that your brother eventually convinced you to clean up your act and you’re now in programs that positively represent our city, it’s obvious you’re no longer into regular criminal activity. I’m not exactly thrilled to hear you sneak into buildings after dark, but it also sounds like you’re also doing so with these four who obviously have an incredible impact on you. Oh, I read all the letters people sent to the four of you, and if you’re ever interested we’ll make sure you see them” she said with a small smile. “SO, because of your improving records and emotionally reasonable life decisions you’ve made in the past, and because of the good work your friends have done to keep this city safe, I’m letting you off with a warning.” All 5 sets of eyes were now staring wide at the chief. She smirked. “Even though you broke many obvious laws in regards to harming officers, you yourself have helped keep this city safe by taking tremendous risks to your body that aided you in stopping Shredder when you probably could work towards taking over the city yourself. So, as long as you follow my rules, then you’re safe.” “And, what exactly are your rules?” Sam asked cautiously.

“I don’t know if you’ve heard, but the NYPD and the NYFS are officially partners now, so anytime you hear anything about this Krang or Shredder or god knows what else will come for us, you ALL need to report your findings to us. In order for our parties to respect each other, we have to trust each other and work together.” The group nodded, assuming this wasn’t such a bad rule. “I’m going to turn a blind eye to your group sneaking into places since from what I’ve understood none of you have ever stolen anything anywhere you’ve gone. As the cities heroes that hide in the shadows, we’ll pretend we don’t know anything as long as you don’t break any rules outside of sneaking in.” Again, the group nodded their heads. “My final rule, you all need to send updates to the NYFS about Sam’s powers and any progress you make in better understanding them.” The chief could sense the tension in the room once she stated her final rule. “Look,” she said as she made sure to face each person in the room at least once as she spoke, “I know that’s not what you want to hear, but if for whatever reason something goes wrong I need to know so that I can keep the people within this city safe. I have no idea what exactly could go wrong, but that’s also because I don’t know anything about these powers except for what you told me seconds ago. I’m fine with you conducting whatever tests you’re planning since the other day you made it clear that you have enough tech to do so, but we need those records after you’ve collected them. If that fails to happen, then any tests deemed important will be conducted by the NYFS. Plus, this allows the rest of us to understand what’s going on in case, somehow, Sam seems off to certain extents. The way I’m explaining it sounds horrible, but I hope you all can understand what I’m getting at.”

Leo nodded his head. “We get what you’re saying. Donnie?” he asked since this last rule would affect him the most out of his brothers. “I get it. Message received loud and clear” Donnie stated. He wasn’t thrilled with basically having to share information about what type of tech he had or would be using since this would be revealed in the tests that would be completed, but if it meant keeping Sam safe then these reveals would be worth it. “Alright” the chief said as she stood up with a smile, “in that case you’re all free to go. Oh, and I assume we’ll see you all tomorrow at this same time down around Battery Park.” The boys looked back and forth at each other in confusion. “Battery Park, ma’am?” Leo asked. Her face scrunched as she stared back at him. “Well yes, it’s one of the few places you can go in order to reach the Statue of Liberty. That’s where your ceremony is being held.” “Our ceremony?” Raph questioned. “Yes, where you’re all getting your keys to the city. Did you not tell them?” the chief asked as she looked down at Sam. Sam was trying her best not to laugh at the shocked expressions on the boys faces. “Heh, no” she stated bluntly, playfully curling up in her chair as a chorus of ‘SAMMMM!’ ‘Aw come on!’ and other claims were made aloud. “Why didn’t you tell us?” Leo asked in a mix of frustration and excitement. “Because your reactions are priceless. I wanted to see if I could go all the way up until tomorrow night before you realized. But this reveal is just as awesome” she said as all the brothers started nudging her. “We’ll be there and ready right at 9” Leo reassured to the chief. “Excellent.” “Oh, just to be sure-” “The only ones that will be there are your immediate human family and the officers who helped you enter the building” the chief said with a smile, knowing what Leo was thinking before he could speak. “Anything else I can answer for you before you go?” she asked. Leo paused, and then a huge smile grew on his face. “Can we bring our dad?”

*The next night, Saturday June 12th, 2015. 9p.m. at the Statue of Liberty monument*

And that was exactly where the group was now. Donnie had driven the truck and followed Jay and Casey’s cars all the way towards Battery Park where the group then boarded a ferry that took them over to the Statue of Liberty monument site. There the four were given their keys to the city as a small ceremony was held to congratulate and thank the turtles for their hard work. Chief Vincent stood and spoke from a speaking stand as she gave a short speech about who the turtles were and all that they had done for the city. All the participating officers stood in rows in front of the small stage where the turtles were now standing tall and proud. In the crowd stood Vern, and on his right Jade, and then Jay, Sam, April, and Casey on the far end. Splinter had also joined the group and was currently attending the event, but he could sense that multiple female officers were a bit ‘freaked out’ by his appearance as a giant rat, so in respect to them he decided to find a comfortable spot where he could bask in the warmth from the lights above and made it his own. He was still in clear and close eye sight of his boys, and that’s all that mattered. As the brothers stood on the stage, Leo, Donnie, and Mikey were all facing towards the chief as she spoke while Raph was currently facing outwards at the crowd of people who were here congratulating him and his brothers, something he never thought would ever happen. Chief Vincent was now coming towards the end of her speech. He then began to smirk as he saw Sam keep wiping at her eyes. Man she was more emotional than she allowed people to know and realize about her.

“For your incredible valor within this community, and for your uncompromising cooperation with this agency, I present to you the keys to the city. A symbol of our appreciation, respect, and for our continued partnership. To you, brothers: Leonardo” Leo had been staring out towards his father. Knowing that his dad was here to see the progress that he and his brothers had made in keeping the city safe, and in working together as a team based on everything their father had ever taught them, this was one of the greatest honors he could ever truly receive. He then looked up at the chief as he heard her announce his name and he shot her an appreciative smile, displaying how thankful he truly was for this experience. “Raphael” Raph shot a similar smile towards the chief and then shone this smile towards the crowd, specifically his human family. It all started with April, and then Vern came along and helped them (no matter how ‘macho’ he tried to be) and then came Sam and Jay, and now even Casey seemed to care and want to help lookout for the group, and Raph would be a total liar if he said he didn’t feel any type of bromance with the hockey maniac that had joined their group.   “Donatello” Donnie had been watching his brothers as their names were called and was grateful just to see the two of them calm and at peace for once. While he was excited to receive this honor, right now it was his brothers that were all on his mind. Family always came first, and to see his oldest brothers so happy meant more to him than any key to the city ever could. He then turned in time to see his youngest brother have his name called, and he chuckled at the way his baby brother reacted. “Michelangelo” Mikey had been staring at all his oldest brothers the way Donnie had. As a younger brother, all he could ever want was for his oldest 3 brothers to feel happy and at peace, so seeing their reactions made his heart happier than anything else. However, he was still the baby brother, so of course his reaction was still very comical compared to Donnie’s more mature and nonchalant glanced smile to the crowd. Mikey heard his name and he whipped his body forward and his hand shot up to give a quick wave to the all those watching.

“Uh, last names?” the chief whispered to the brothers. Each of their faces went blank as they realized they had never EVER thought of this, and they also began to wonder how the heck they had never once thought of this. Donnie was about to make a comment when they all heard someone coughing, and possibly trying to speak from the crowd. “cough, cough, ama, cough, toe” Sam coughed. “I’m sorry?” the chief questioned. “Ahem” Sam said, lightly beating her hand to her chest to make it seem like she was actually coughing. “I said their last name is Hamato” she said as she held her arms down below in front of her waist and twiddled her thumbs. She then turned towards Splinters direction, as if gaining his approval. “Right Sensei?” Splinter stroked his furred beard between his claws. “Hmmm Hamato, as in the great ninja Hamato Yoshi…yes, that seems like a nice last name for our family. It blends together quite well.” He then noticed Sam giving him a thumbs up with a large smile on her face, and the old rat couldn’t help but laugh as he shot her a thumbs up in return.

“In that case, to the Hamato brothers, congratulations” the chief announced as a round of applause pursued for the brothers. People then began to disperse and talk amongst each other. Sam was smiling and watching over the brothers, who were now excitedly talking amongst each other, as she felt a light nudge in her right side. “Well, looks like someone had to copy me, huh?” April teased. “Psh, you named all of them, it’s only fair that I get to give them one last name to share” she said as she nudged the woman back. “She’s got a point” Casey added. April then teasingly shot him a confused look. “Okay, who’s side are you on?” she asked. Sam noticed the obvious fliting going on between these two, so she turned to talk to Jay, only to notice that he was talking to Jade and Vern, so she decided it was time to move forward and congratulate her brothers. She took a few steps forward and hopped up onto the small stage. She then paused for a moment before deciding which brother to stand by and from which direction, trying not to obviously walk right over towards him first. She then shook her head, deciding that it didn’t matter if she walked towards him or any other brother, they were all family and that’s what mattered. “Wooooooooooow” she said as she leaned in close towards Leo’s chest, “these things really shine.” Leo gently pushed her back as he laughed. “Thank you for respecting me by not touching the key, but you’re invading my personal space.” “Dude, personal space doesn’t exist within this family” Sam teased. Leo shrugged. “Fair enough” he said as he threw his arm around her, although he did so in a way where Sam now had an arm basically covering her head so that she couldn’t stand up, similar to what he’d do if he were wrestling Mikey. “Okay! Okay I get it!” she said through laughs. Leo turned to face her once he let go. “Hamato Leonardo. I like it. It rolls off the tongue well” he said with a smile. “Right?! Like they all sound good when pronounced it the English format-” “English format?” Mikey questioned. “Yeah, like first name then last. Michelangelo Hamato. It sounds good right. But when said like how names are pronounced in Japan, last name then first, so Hamato Michelangelo-” “That sounds badass!” Mikey stated with wide excited eyes. Sam snapped her fingers and then pointed at him. “Exactly!” “What made you choose that name?” Donnie asked. “What, you don’t like it?” She groaned as a means to tease him. He chuckled in response. “Actually, I love it. It sounds perfect. I’m just curious why seaside.” “Why what?” Raph asked. “That’s what Hamato is known to stand for” Sam responded. “But I chose it more so because of who the name belonged to rather than its meaning. The Hamato clan was known to defend and protect each other until their final breath. They were true warriors who honored the codes of the ninja, but also strongly believed in protecting one another. They lived in the shadows, but they made sure the rest of their clan was their waiting for them when they came back. They didn’t go behind each other’s back and they didn’t betray each other. They were a true family” she said with pride. “Awww look at you getting all mushy” Raph said as he ruffled the girl’s hair, in which she playfully scowled at him in response.

“Oh that’s Sam alright” Jay said as he hopped up onto the small stage. “She has more emotions bottled up in here than she lets on” he said as he rubbed his knuckle against the top of her head. He then faced the four brothers. “Alright so I have three comments and questions for the four of you. First of all, congratulations Mr, Mr, Mr, and Mr. Hamato” he said as he waved his arm in front of him and then bowed. “Second. I wanted to ask this in front of all of you so that no one is keeping secrets from anyone, but this mostly pertains to you” he said as he now pointed straight at Donnie. “Me?” Donnie asked, pointing to himself. “Yes. So, there’s a project that various scientists in the NYFS are working on and we were curious to know if you’d be willing to join us. Now that the Mutanimals live in the sewers they’ve been exploring and found an awesome underground space that we can use for this project. Don’t worry, it’s nowhere near your lair, and the few guys working on this project have already seen all of you before and have sworn to keep their mouths shut. What do you guys think?” Leo paused for a second. He wanted to trust and assume this would all be safe, but he also needed to take precautions both as leader and also as the ‘always worried older brother,’ Leo looked at Jay and then back towards the rest of his brothers. “We all go and check it out the first time to see what precautions you’re taking and to meet the people you’re working with, and also to learn more about what this project is. That will determine whether he officially participates or not.” Leo then turned and faced Donatello. “Fair?” he questioned cautiously. Donnie nodded with a smile. “Fair.” Jay clapped and rubbed his hands together in excitement. “Awwww this is gonna be awesome! Alright, final comment. PLEASEEEEEE RSVP as soon as possible whether you guys are attending or not. We’re still trying to figure out how much food we need and we don’t know whether or not we’ll be sending plates up to you guys or not so once you know for sure please contact me” he said, holding his hands in front of him as if he was praying for their cooperation. Leo chuckled but shot him a puzzled look. “Um, sure. But what are we RSVPing for exactly?” Then the brothers paused as they began to realize what Jay was talking about. “Wait, you don’t mean what I think you mean!” Mikey exclaimed with a huge smile on his face. “But, how? No way!” Raph stated. Jay’s eyes were wide and his jaw dropped low. “Wait, are you guys serious?” he asked as he looked at the mix of puzzled and thrilled faces in front of him. “SAM!” While Jay had been talking to the boys, Sam had momentarily gone over and talked to Casey and Jade, but she was now returning to the stage as she heard her brother shout her name and then frantically wave her over. “What’s up?” Jay stood there with one arm crossed over his stomach and the opposite knuckle resting on his chin. He then stood in front of Sam so that she was turned so that her back was to the guys as he spoke to her. “Sam, you told the guys they’re invited to the wedding, right?” Because Sam was facing Jay she couldn’t see the jumping Michelangelo, the jaw dropped older duo, and the smiling-arms behind his head Donatello. “Of course I did!” Sam stated, waving her brother away. “Really? Tell me how they reacted” Jay said. “Well…they…huh” Sam said with her arms crossed as she looked up towards the sky as she tried to remember what she told the turtles…only to realize that she had not, and that meant they were all reacting right now behind her. Her eyes widened as she spun around and stared at the now calm brothers after getting their excitement out. “Awwwwww you boob you did that on purpose! You didn’t even record their reactions for me” she pouted. “Well that’s what you get for keeping us in the dark!” Donnie teased as he slapped his hands down on her pouting shoulders as he stood behind her. “I didn’t mean to” she mumbled, “I’ve just been very busy lately.” “So, what else haven’t you told us?” Raph asked. “Oh! Did she tell you she got accepted to Blair?” Mikey asked. This time Sam was able to see the boys animated reactions. Of course, right after they decided to tease her as much as possible. “Great, so that means we’re stuck with you for the next four years?” Raph asked. “Oh you’re stuck with me way longer than that!” Sam exclaimed. “Right, I keep forgetting you’re the headache that just keeps coming back over, and over, and over again” he said, rolling his wrist. “Exactly! Now even the strongest pill can get rid of me” Sam said with a beaming smile. “Man you suck at updating people on important info” Leo mocked. Sam opened her mouth to defend herself, but then gritted her teeth together. “It’s definitely not my strongest quality” she said, scooting back a bit in embarrassment. “Soooooo we’re going right?” Mikey asked his brothers. “How exactly will all of that work?” Donnie asked. “So we have two way mirrors that will cover the top pews, that way you guys can sneak in and no one can see you, and then the church we’re holding the wedding at has this huge back room where we’re holding the reception” Jay informed them. “We’ll have the few people who have actually met you guys keeping you up to date on what’s happening, and yes we’ll feed you” he said as he stared straight at Mikey. “Yeah, exactly as I told all of you” Sam said, before she was playfully shoved by all four brothers. “We’ll be there” Leo said to Jay. “WE WILL?!” Mikey basically shrieked. “Yes, we will. But only if you behave” Leo said as he now pointed his finger at his youngest brother. “What? I’m always…uhhh never mind” he backed off as he saw the glares from his three older brothers.

Just then Chief Vincent returned back to the stage to talk to the brothers. Sam and Jay walked back over towards the small crowd and continued to mingle with familiar faces. Of course, Sam was eavesdropping as best as she could even from the further away distance where she was currently standing. “I think you should give people more credit” the chief said, “they’ll accept you now.” ‘They already did, it’s your guys who didn’t’ Sam thought to herself. “You’re probably right” said Raph’s voice, “but uh, I think we’ll stick to the arrangement that we already had.” Sam smiled to herself, happy to hear that she would still get her quality time with the brothers. But then her face became more sunken and serious. ‘Wait…why am I so happy to hear that? I want them to be able to share their uniqueness and quirky abilities with others someday. What the hell?’ Sam thought to herself. “If you ever need us, April knows where to find us” Leo stated calmly. Sam didn’t know it, but the reason Leo had only mentioned April’s name was because he wanted to keep Sam away from having to talk to the cops (unless she was in danger of course) as much as possible based on everything that had recently happened. “Really? You could live a normal life, like the rest of us” the chief stated with enthusiasm. This made Sam role her eyes. Of course she wanted the turtles to experience all that life had to offer, but she also loved how different they were. But then she heard Raph say: “Normal? What fun is that?”

Sam then turned around when she heard this and stared at the brothers, but she did so at an angle so that she could see them as she stared through the crowd of people, but from their angles they could not see her (or so she thought, since one of them wearing orange had been keeping his eyes on her in secret the entire time without her knowing). The chief chuckled. “Well based on what I already know, you four have had some interesting adventures. So I can understand and respect you choosing your lifestyle over ours. Besides, it seems you found some great family members even if you do spend most of your time underground.” The boys smiled as they each looked out in the same direction that the chief now was at the family they had within the crowd. Mikey however was the only one that noticed Sam spin around once she saw the brothers gaze wash over the crowd. He chuckled. “Yeah, our extended family is pretty great” he said in a relaxed tone. The chief stared back at the turtles one final time. “Any last requests for the night before we all head home?” she asked. The brothers looked at each other and noticed that Leo kept looking back at the towering monument behind them. “You’re allowed up there you know” the chief stated with a smile. Leo whipped back around. “We are?” She nodded. “I just have to tell the officers that guard this monument so that they know not to leave until you come back down.” “Whoaaaaaaa. Thanks!” Mikey said enthusiastically. The chief laughed. “My pleasure. I’ll be right back.”

At that moment, Splinter joined the boys on stage. “My sons, I’m so proud of each and every one of you” he said with a heartwarming smile. “I’m so happy, yet so sad to see each of you grow and mature the way you are” he said genuinely. Mikey shot him a confused look. “Why would you be sad dad?” The old rat chuckled. “Simple. This means you are no longer the baby boys that I have watched over all these years” he said as he placed his hand on his youngest sons shoulder. The four brothers smiled. “Dad, you know we’re always gonna be around no matter how old we get, right?” Leo reassured with a smile. “I know, but all parents feel this way as they see their children grow over time. BUT, tonight is a time for all of you to celebrate together. I on the other hand am going to head home. Don’t do anything crazy now” he said with a playful glare towards his sons. “Pffff what, us?” Raph teased. “As if.” “Wait, who are you leaving with? You’re not heading home by yourself” Donnie stated. Splinter shook his head. “Do not worry my son, I’m heading home with our human companions since it seems they’re all leaving now as well.” The group looked over and saw their human friends walking over to say their final goodbyes. While April, Casey, Vern, Jay, and Jade all said goodbye to the oldest three brothers, Mikey pulled Sam away from the group to talk to her. “Okay what’s happening?” Sam asked a little more awkwardly than she meant to. “You’re leaving?” he asked as if he had just been punched in the gut. “Only for 8 years.” “WHAT?!” “I’m kidding!” she laughed as she pushed his shoulder. “I’m just heading home with Jay so I can help him and Brenda plan their upcoming wedding since important planning was put on hold due to this crazy alien invasion that happened a few days ago. You should have been there for it, it was all over the news!-” “Why are you heading home?” Mikey said, interrupting her teasing. She shot him a confused look. “I just told you, to help with wedding-” “But you can do that any day. Why tonight?” he asked timidly. Sam could sense that her friend felt hurt, as if she was ditching him to go hangout with someone else and like she was avoiding them. She smiled and began to talk in a more serious tone. “Look, when I still had my siblings, there were times where we would all hang out as a family while also inviting all are friends that were as close as family, but there were also times where we wanted people to respect our need to hang out with those that were just family. Sometimes siblings have to just focus on each other. That doesn’t mean I’m going away, it means I’m respecting that you guys need time where it’s just you. Plus, I know I’m the greatest tomboy out there, but brothers still need times to just be themselves. Just like how there were times I wanted to be alone with my sisters, no matter how different Amber and I were from the other two” she said with a light laugh. Mikey shot her a genuine smile. “You look out for us too much” he teased, although this type of teasing had sincerity to it. Sam looked him right in the eye and smiled. “Well that’s what happens when you have four new younger brothers that take over your life.” As she spoke, Mikey could sense from the sparkle in her eyes alone how much he and his brothers truly meant to Sam. He hoped that she realized that they all felt the same way about her. “Now come on” she said as she spun him around and began to pull on his arm, “let’s get back to the group before they start getting suspicious.” “Heh, okay” he said, although in his mind he was thinking ‘suspicious of what?’

Once the two joined the rest of the group Sam updated them that she would be heading home with Jay and Jade (who was also involved in the wedding) to help with wedding planning. The remaining three brothers teased her some, but they didn’t need her to go into full details about why she was truly leaving. They all knew her well enough to know where her mindset was at.

With that, the human group began to head out. Splinter went with April, Casey, and Vern, and Sam went with her older brother and Jade. As the group was beginning to board the ferry to head back to Battery Park, they all turned around to see the four boys cheering from the top of the statue of liberty. “Man they’re fast” Jade said with a smile. “They’re also just insane” Jay teased, knowing his Sensei could hear him. “I’d defend them, but they all have their interesting moments. But you didn’t hear that from me” the old rat teased. Sam laughed and then looked back up at her four turtle brothers. She was happy to see them united as a group once again, and although she had just stated to Mikey that she knew they needed time to hangout by themselves, she’d be a liar if she wasn’t hoping that the time she would get to hang out with them again would come by soon. ‘Then again, a small, extremely short break from these guys wouldn’t be horrible, especially after those weird random thoughts I had about him the other night’ she thought to herself with a shudder (to which she informed a suspicious Jay that it was just the breeze from the cold night’s air). Minutes later the group arrived back at the port where Sam decided that once she met back up with her brothers, everything would be back to normal…she hoped.

  Random info: so I listen to a wide variety of music and many times I listen to songs that motivate me to plan out and come up with ideas for future and current events throughout the series. If anyone is interested, I would highly recommend listening to the song Beautiful Creatures by Illenium. Like if you listen to the lyrics you can twist them so that it fits the lives and goals of the turtles, at least those are the images I’ve been picturing as I listen to that song (that and the vocals and more techno instrumental sound is insanely addicting). But seriously I could see this song being a perfect way to end a TMNT film as the credits come up. Kind of like how at the end of Out of the Shadows they had a new remixed version of the 80’s theme playing while those cartoon images of the cast were played along the with the cast’s names, I could see this song being used for something like that and being the perfect end to a TMNT movie.