#obvious clause here that some autistic genuinely find empathy difficult

[theorahsart]

When any of my friends get diagnosed officially with autism, I watch them go gradually from one phase to the next regards Empathy.

The first phase is the: 'Oh, no, I don't have empathy, I can't interpret feelings very well you see. I always found it difficult, and now I know that I dont understand feelings very well' phase.

Which theyve been taught via the process of trying to get diagnosed. Its a topic used a lot to identify autism and used in many diagnosis tools.

Then eventually, once they've been diagnosed, and so have the freedom to fully explore themselves without holding up their differences through the lense of specific criterias needed to get a diagnosis, they start to go through the next phase:

'But it is kinda strange....because I do feel things a lot. And I understand other peoples feelings. In fact I feel like I feel emotions more intensely than other people. But I just get misinterpreted a lot, because its like we communicate differently...'

And then they get to that final conclusion:

'OH, I do have empathy. I have a lot of empathy. I recognise feelings very well. Its just that Im not speaking the NT language, and they aren't speaking mine. So Im in a world where the feelings get lost in translation'

I observe this a lot because from an outsider pov, its very easy to see that your friends have empathy and feelings, even if they've convinced themselves during the 'Im autistic' realisation that they dont. And Ive been through this myself, many years ago. You know you're different/autistic, and try to squeeze into the specifics set up for a diagnosis criteria originally made by NTs