#numbskull

[weirdmarioenemies]

I've been thinking about Snood a lot lately. Never did I expect I would suddenly become so Snoodpilled! Exactly one week ago, I decided I didn't want to talk about each Snood individually. But I can't help it. I'm gonna do it! I'm about to Snood! I could go on and on about the history of Snood but other people have done that already and you can find it if you're interested. I am just going to explore the designs of each of these little disembodied heads (they are officially referred to as such. I don't know where their bodies went) and you're going to watch! I want you to imagine this happening physically. You sitting in a room while someone plays a slideshow of Snoods while analyzing them. That's what we do here!

Jake is the Main Snood! The simplest, the most straightforward. He is sort of just a face, and I know all the Snoods are, but this is even more straightforward than most! He is pretty striking, though, with his deep blue and intense stare, compared to the more expected yellow smiling face. Despite his simplicity, Jake has served as the mascot of Snood from the beginning, and I guess he's a good choice for that. I don't actively enjoy the designs of many Snoods, so maybe I would say that about any one declared as the mascot, though.

Zod is already much more of a freak than Jake! He's angry, his sclerae turn cyan, and he bares his sharp teeth. My favorite part is that his nostrils glow! What's going on in there? Little creatures throwing a raging party? Or maybe it means it works as an electrical outlet! Most of all, Zod's most interesting feature is his shape. He has four flat-looking protrusions, as if he could easily stand on any of them. Or maybe they're suction cups. Or maybe they're open holes! Stick your arm in and wave at someone from through a Zod! If you cover all but the top one, you could drink a beverage out of him!

Midoribe heard someone say "be there or be square", and let me tell you. He was not there. He is the Snood who fills up most of the space of his sprite, which gives him an interesting vibe of being the Biggest One. I feel like the characters all being radically different shapes would lead to aiming being a bit more difficult depending on which one you're launching. There could be a Snood Visual Clarity tier list! Awesome. Midoribe's face isn't all that interesting, besides his fascinating nose. The bridge is oh so thin, but the nostrils so builbous, looking almost like two tunicates attached to a stactite! Pretty cool of his nose!

Geji is my favorite Snood! The face isn't that exciting compared to the other Snoods', though I like how happy she looks in the standard expression. I say "she" because Snood HD made Geji a very standard Girl Snood design, but look at this original one and tell me that isn't an awesome and epic girl. The best part is all her tendrils! Geji is like a bacterium or something, with all these cilia emerging from her relatively small main body, and filling out the space of her sprite! I bet those could catch plankton if they needed to. They even droop like mammal ears when Geji is sad. But Geji has much reason to smile, and that includes her very interesting widely-placed but tall teeth. Look at them!

Sunny is, I think, the most conventional Snood. A yellow smiley guy with sunglasses, and he's named after the sun. Pretty standard! However, he is the only standard Snood to wear an accessory, which I guess is notable of him. He has the default Mii nose and that is funny to me. The more I look at him, the more I like him! I really like his lopsided smile, and I reasonably like the way his mouth widens SO much when grinning. He is so happy. Lastly, I like how he reminds me of Cheez-It Gripz. Remember Gripz? Gripz were just okay.

Mildred has a really wacky shape! I am not sure how to describe it. Actually, now that I look more closely, she's shaped like a baby's shirt and diaper at rest, and like a somewhat poofy dress when frowning. I don't think that was at all the intention, she is just very oddly shaped! I like it. Mildred has easily the most striking eyes of all, with cyan sclerae, black irises, and pink pupils! They look like they would give her some kind of ability along the lines of X-ray vision. Their positioning makes me think of a hammerhead shark! Mildred's upper lip has a funny little nubbin that seems to lock into a funny little nubbin-shaped slot on the lower lip, and it feels almost beak-like to me. Mildred could chomp a prickly pear pad pretty easily if she wanted to.

Spike is the last of our regular Snoods, and I think he might be my second favorite! His worried expressions are so endearing to me. I think he would be the big tough guy with a heart of gold. He looks like he would be a monster living under a kid's bed, and he would be more scared than the kid when they encounter each other. His horns are kind of the most creature-like of a trait that any Snood has, which is interesting! I think if Spike had a full body, he would have hooves.

AAAAHHHHH!!!! EEK!!!!! This is Numbskull, and Numbskull is a BAD SNOOD! Numbskull cannot be matched with itself and gets in the way and is evil and a bad guy. At first glance it looks like a standard skull, but the more I look at it, the more it looks alive, actually! It has lips. It has nostrils. What I thought were cracks are brown, as if hair! Skin vibes from this Snood. Not only is it an obstacle, but if you don't manage to save all the Snoods, they will turn INTO Numbskulls! Not only did you kill them, you made them bad guys. Nice going, PAL! Luckily we have some MAGIC SNOODS to help deal with them...

Rowbuilder will build a row of all the same kind of Snood, giving an easy area to clear, and transforming other Snoods, including Numbskulls. They can become nice again! They put redemption arcs in Snood! Rowbuilder himself is a weird sort of guy, with a very gaunt face, even more gaunt than the actual skull guy. He has weird Rayman hair on top, and two big ol' arrows on the sides of his head that can stick out to show you that, oh yes, this is a Horizontal Ability guy. I don't have much opinion on him. That little triangle under his mouth could just be a gradient thing, but I think it would be really funny if it was a Snood Soul Patch.

Stone, on the other hand, I love! What's going on with this thing! It is honestly frightening-looking! A strangely-textured orb, entirely out of style with the other Snoods, and a face that's just some vacant, featureless depressions. This would give uncanny valley vibes to a sentient bowling ball. Even though it's a rock, the texture looks like an annelid worm's segments to me. Also even though it's a rock, it explodes! I really don't know why it isn't a bomb (and it would in fact be replaced by a bomb in a later game) but I'm glad it's an unsettling rock instead!

Then there's Wildcard. This goofy guy. This chucklehead. He is playing one of his trademark Tricks on us by not having a unique design in the original game, forcing me to use his sprite from a different game, completely disregarding the consistency of this post! The rascal! He is on our side though, and can turn into whatever Snood is needed to make a match, so don't kill him with hammers. He's alright in the end. The real shame is that he wasn't the Joker in Snood Solitaire! Joker's Trick!

And last, and arguably least, we have Odin. I like Odin, but Odin does not appear in any "mainline" Snood games, just a few spinoffs! Their design is much less upsetting than any other Snood's. This is easy to look at. So obviously I would love to see what Odin would look like if they were a gradient freak like the other Snoods! I think peach is a good color choice for an additional Snood, and the expressions are fun and distinct, but the arrow-shaped horns (?) do evoke Rowbuilder, so something a bit more distinct would have been nice. Maybe antennae, or ossicones!

And that's all the Snoods! I will not be going over their various redesigns, because none are nearly as visually striking and distinct as the originals. Especially the Snood HD ones, who are cohesive and have more mass appeal, at the cost of actual interesting designs. In the end, I still feel none of the Snoods are my style, but they sure are Interesting!

[teecupangel]

I realize I've had a similar idea in the past, but please consider: reverse isekai protagonist Desmond who is the only human left in the world after touching the isu device because everyone else was transported into a bunch of different parallel universes (/=crossovers of your choice), each containing one of his ancestors.

He must now convince his ancestors to undo their parallel universes an de-isekai the world before reality collapses in on itself.

Oh, and he has no idea how to contact them, all he can do is get into the Animus and see what they're doing.

No preassure.

(+extra points if we get some cameos from the modern day protagonists. Maybe they're the key to fixing the world?)

You know what would be funny?

If everyone was transported into universes connected to their voices and the modern day Assassins are there for the ride and have no idea what the fuck is happening.

.

So we have Altaïr and his voice actor Philip Shahbaz has been in a lot of films and tv series. Considering how I write Altaïr, I would suggest we punt him to one of the crime procedural series that his voice actor guest starred in. We can go for SEAL Team because the episode Philip Shahbaz is in for that series is set in Syria so we can have Altaïr see what his homeland has become in this possible future. Alternatively, we can kick him to NCIS instead and it would be a case of Altaïr having to deal with both the modern day world and hiding himself from the NCIS team who is looking into the death of a military personnel that, coincidentally, was nearby when Altaïr was transferred into their world. Since you want one of the modern day protagonists as a cameo, how about instead of being a cameo, they become the main Assassins’ sidekick? The Watson to their Holmes, some may say. We’re pairing Altaïr with the initiate of Unity and Syndicate (there is a possibility that they’re not the same person but I normally just make them the same person because they’re meant to be us in those games). The initiate would know how the Brotherhood operates so they serve more as Altaïr’s assistant that he calls ‘novice’. The recruit is actually the one who realizes they’re in a tv show because they watch criminal procedural shows while grinding (because, according to them, Arno’s rank system is a grindy piece of shit)

.

For Ezio… now, Roger Craig Smith has done a lot of character voices BUT there is one specific character that we’re going to choose because (1) it will confuse the hell out of Ezio and (2) the characters share the same birthday: Sonic the Hedgehog. And he would have the lovely Layla assisting him for this predicament. Layla is just as confused as him but the best part of this entire thing is that Layla grew up playing Sonic the Hedgehog so they’re not going in blind. Sonic absolutely mimics Ezio’s voice whenever he wants to mess with the man XD

.

Okay. So for Ratonhnhaké:ton… he voiced a multiplayer character in Red Dead Redemption and that is all the excuse I need to kick him to RDR. Normally, he’d be punted to RDR1 but if you want to punt him to RDR2 instead, be my guest. Regardless of which game he gets kicked into, the main premise is the same. Ratonhnhaké:ton tries to find the Brotherhood but sees none and gets roped into the Van der Linde gang’s ‘shenanigans’ (RDR2) or entangled with Dutch’s Gang (RDR1). For this one, he gets stuck with Numbskull and it’s a very tense partnership because Numbskull admits that they’re a Templar (whether by choice or because they were coerced would remain vague until later on) but they’re both in the same mess so they’re gonna try and make the best of it.

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And now we come to Haytham. I am sooooo tempted to put him in a Hallmark movie called Christmas at Holly Lodge just to fuck with him. BUT if we really want to fuck with him, we kick him to Riverdale and let him suffer through the batshit crazy plot that series had. And, just to rub salt to the wound, he’s stuck with Noob who is starting to Bleed Edward Kenway. Haytham gets roped into Riverdale’s plot because Noob believes that’s the key to how they can return to their own world. The problem? Noob only watched the first season of Riverdale so they’re both flying blind XD

.

In post-apocalyptic world where Desmond is the only human left…

Instead of the Animus, he finds out what his ancestors are doing because the Apple connected to TVs from a random mall that Desmond went to for a supply run.

He’s still working out on how to contact his ancestors.

But his phone… strangely enough… has four new contacts that he doesn’t recognize.

Desmond still needs to find a signal though XD

[doctor366]

Monster Trio

[spacevixenmusic]

Source: ThunderCats [2011]

[cheesycokeart]

watch out for those numbskulls!

just felt like drawing something of an action pic featuring the warmongers! i really gotta mess around and make more "bioengineered" designs. they gotta fill different evolutionary niches, y'know?

also i tagged this one as mature for the violence, know the amount a' blood here might not be to everyone's tastes!

[i-am-trans-gwender]

When I was a kid I thought elephant trunks were there dicks.

[googlyeyesonmagiccards]

Who you calling a numbskull, numbskull!

[wutbju]

The Haldeman-Julius Weekly from Girard, Kansas on December 19, 1925 nominated Bob Jones, Sr. for the Numbskullurian Hall of Boobery for saying:

If you could understand the Bible, I wouldn't have it. The very fact that men have been unable to understand it convinces me that it is the Word of God.

That's a dumb argument, Bob.

[peridot-tears]

I don't know why Ubisoft is ashamed of their silent first-person Animus user period. It was actually really neat to look inside Abstergo's fancy-evil corporate guts and see Shaun and Rebecca slip in incognito. The implications of Numbskull's coerced initiation are fantastic, and you got these delicious soundbites of Juhani Otso Berg's interactions with Warren Vidic and Violet Da Costa.

Not to mention that at this period in time, Ubisoft seems to have mastered weaving the modern-day plot into the memory you're playing. It's smooth, it feels like it drives the story forward, and you still get to enjoy the past timeline.

(Desmond sneaking into the soccer stadium in Brazil during ACIII and all those tunnels you have to explore as Layla felt exhausting. At least Layla's gave you a nice look at how she's literally walking in Kassandra's footsteps, but those caves get repetitive.)

[appealingtonobody]

[evilhorse]

I don’t want a thing to do with you, you—you—numbskull!

[sad-theater-kid]

Chat if you like crafts and plants and stuff go follow my friend

@nonbinary-numbskull

[teecupangel]

What if Desmond time travels not with Clay/Ezio/other assassin, but with a modern-day Templar with minimal fighting training (Rogue's modern protagonist?) that's freaking out the entire time and follows him around like a lost puppy?

Why just Numbskull?

Why not make him responsible of all the nameless/voiceless protagonists?

Imagine Desmond waking up in some random time period and he has three people he doesn’t even know all looking at him with varying faces of surprise and confusion.

Just imagine the dumb shits Desmond has to deal with on top of trying to figure out what the hell to do in this time period (bonus points if it’s like the 3rd Crusaders where they would definitely stick out soooo badly).

Their backstories…

Initiate: Be careful! They’re a Templar!

Numbskull: Berg had a gun! You think I have any real say if I was going to become a Templar?! Hey, at least I’m not some rando who gets instructions from some woman I don’t even know the real name of and only leaves messages on my computer. Really feel the UNITY there!

.

Noob: Hey, you think we can pop in and kill Juno?

Desmond: … It’s in my to-do list but we can’t do it right now. Why?

Noob: I have a list of how we can try to kill her without setting her loose.

Desmond: (stares at Noob for a moment) Why?

Noob: She tried to take over my body after her reincarnated husband tried to frame me and kidnapped me.

Desmond: … I need a drink.

Noob: (perks up) Can I get a Shirley Templar?

.

Then Desmond has to deal with them having skills that just give him headaches.

Desmond: Uuuhhh… Where did you get all these?

Noob: I pickpocketed the guards after I pretended to be a guard. Guard meetings are borings.

Desmond:…………… Are we sure you’re not a kleptomaniac?

.

Initiate: If I stand perfectly still and control my breathing, they won’t see me.

Desmond: ……… That’s… that’s not really… oh my god…

.

Numbskull: I did it! I made a grenade launcher! Look!

Desmond: ……… I’m pretty sure you just made mortar.

Numbskull: …… I miss Benjamin.

.

Assassin: Your acolyte is a danger to everyone!

Desmond: (not even surprised anymore) Which one?

[doctor366]

The spot

[brutalgamer]

Arcade fans can continue those mini-home arcades, as Numbskull reveals two more quarter-scale cabs

The masters of the quarter-scale form factor, Numbskull is dropping two more cabinets with Elevator Action and Zoo Keeper.

[theoldbrewery]