#now you’ve surely followed a lot of blogs oh god

[leejihoonownsmyheart]

hiii, now that i know that we're simultaneously reading the pathetic series (hehe) and that you know abt my existence, i wanted to say that i love your writing style, actually you were one of the first blogs i started following when i first got into Tumblr last year , so I've been keeping track with your work ever since! also a quick reminder to keep yourself well rested and hydrated while you do your things, aside from writing, health comes first and I'm sure pathetic Jeonghan would agree ! , anyways take care! i hope to keep coming to your asks more often now💗💗

Nnnnggggghhhhhhhhhhh thank you I’m glad you like my writing 😭🫠 Saying that you like my writing style really is such a high compliment thank you 😭😭

NO WORRIES with the summer in full swing I have been very very healthy! Lots of sleep, rarely overworking myself sigh. It’s boring i feel like I’m doing nothing these days BUT it’s been very healthy. Thank you </3 I HOPE THAT YOU ARE TAKING CARE OF YOURSELF TOO I hope to see you around more too!!

[inkwolvesandcoffee]

Coy Messages & New Love (Daddy Dom!John Price on Tumblr Headcanons)

Or: More headcanons for a story I might write someday.

CoD Masterlist

Username: CaptainBear

He’s a soft Daddy Dom but with a rough edge. So is it any surprise John is very possessive yet also genuinely caring?

And kinda heartbroken you don’t live in England despite coming across as British.

Is always the first to like your posts.

And despite the rules you set, especially the DNI if you’re 40+ (in my mind, John is about 42), you allow him to interact with your content.

Because there’s something drawing you to him, something inexplicable that craves his attention. Something that keeps you hoping there’s a chance.

Your heart almost leaps out of your chest when you receive a notification.

CaptainBear sent you a message.

CaptainBear: Hey, I just wanted to say I thoroughly enjoy your blog and you seem like a very darling girl. And pretty to boot! You probably won’t respond to this and that’s fine, but I thought I’d finally gather the courage to pop in and tell you.

CaptainBear: Also, if I may be blunt, seeing you wear that choker in combination with that bunny shirt makes it very difficult to think. If you were at base with me, I don’t think I’d be of any use. Mission planning would be nigh on impossible.

(your_username): Base? What do you do for a living?

CaptainBear: I’m in the military. Captain.

(your_username): Wow, seriously?! That’s incredible! But, with all due respect, what is a man like you doing in a place like this?

CaptainBear: Satisfying my curiosity. Maybe on a mission to find something.

(your_username): Which is?

CaptainBear: Companionship. With luck, yours.

(your_username): What’s your name, soldier? If you tell me, I’ll see what I can do.

CaptainBear: It’s John. Sorry, should’ve mentioned that. Quite a generic name too, I know.

(your_username): It’s alright, John. Is it short for anything or just John?

CaptainBear: It’s short for Jonathan, but only my Mum calls me that.

(your_username): But what if I did?

CaptainBear: God, you’ve got no idea how much I now want to hear you say it.

(your_username): Maybe someday you will.

He regularly checks up on you, even multiple times a day. Look, John just wants to make sure you ate, stay hydrated, and are healthy.

When he's on leave, it's not uncommon to get a message from him accompanied by a picture of a pint with the context he's at a pub with his pals. More often than not, it's followed by a confession he'd rather spend the evening with you.

Loves it when you send him photos, especially to show off new lingerie you bought.

Thrives on the knowledge he gets to see more of you than anyone else and loves the thought you’re showing others what they can’t have.

Because it’s all his.

Has confessed to jerking off to them… a lot.

Shares little bits of his day with you. He’d be at a bookshop and ask you to pick something for him to read or your recommendations. Or he’ll be cooking and be struck with curiosity because what is your favourite food? What do you like to eat?

CaptainBear: Y/N, I made a brownie.

(your_username): Oh, is it any good?

The photo he sends you answers the question. Nevertheless, just to be sure and give him the chance to give context, you send a follow-up question. (your_username): Did you use 90% cocoa chocolate or is it…

CaptainBear: It’s burnt… so now you know I can’t bake. I’m a man of many talents, but baking isn’t one.

(your_username): I’m sure you more than make up for it otherwise, sir.

CaptainBear: You’ll find out when we meet, my dear.

Assures you that when he’s away on deployment he’s not making up a lie to be with another. And in order to prove that, John will sneak in photos to show you he’s really in Iraq or wherever else.

Drives the task force up the wall because he gets quite lovey dovey in private.

Leaves compliments on your posts which are laced with possessiveness and his obsession with you (my pretty Dollie, sweet little thing, etc.) on your posts. He tags you in photos and reblogs too to let you know what he's into, thinks you like, and hopes for your relationship and possible future.

Furthermore, he also shows you claimed him via reblogs and by stating he’s ‘taken and proudly devoted to (your_username)’ in his blog’s bio (even before he's asked for your submission, which he is pretty sure you'll give him. Until then, it's a way to stave off unwanted attention).

Gets especially gooey with lust and affection when you show him the plushies you’ve crocheted (totally not saying this because I crochet, haha). Like, he’ll immediately brighten when he sees a '(your_username): John (and occasionally sir or even Daddy later down the line), look at this!' followed by a photo of you snuggling with your new animal buddy.

As time passes by and you two get to know each other in more ways than one, you finally decide to meet. The moment you tell John you booked a train to London during the time he’s on leave he’s overjoyed. Ecstatic even.

The moment you enter King’s Cross, he spots you and practically runs over to wrap you up in a warm bear hug before you can get so much as a greeting out. The only sound you make is a surprised squeal as he lifts you up and twirls you around. “My little lady, finally home.”

At last, you regain your voice. “Hello to you too, Jonathan.”

Though he loathes hearing anyone else use his full name, he melts on the spot when you do. Moreover, he’s flattered you remembered the promise he thought was an empty one, a fleeting wish.

Turned into a dream come true.

Takes you out for coffee and Build-A-Bear as a first date the day after because your first day together gets lost to unpacking and settling into the Hackney townhouse he calls ‘home’. Lost to getting the messages (holding hands all the while), learning how each of you likes their coffee, what his favourite cigars are, what your favourite food is.

Lost to the feeling of what it’ll be like to live together.

It’s surprisingly much easier for John to tune into you than he expected. Henceforth, he picks up on the hesitation that underlines your movements, the slight shudder in your lips while he tries his best not to get completely lost in you.

“We don’t have to do this,” he hastily says between kisses, needing to get the words out before you start something you won’t want to finish.

“No, I want to, John. I want you.” You told him you’re a virgin and have given off clues that the concept of actually having sex is, to be honest, quite frightening. Nevertheless, you’ve put your trust in him and feel secure in his touch, his embrace.

“I know, love, but I mean that we don’t, shouldn’t even, have sex if you don’t want to.” His features soften. “Don’t do it if you feel like you need to to please me because you don’t. I’ll wait for when you’re ready. I told you before, this isn’t about sex or the dynamic. I love you. Love who you, you as a person, are and I don’t want to pressure you into doing anything you don’t want.”

After reassuring him and giving him your consent explicitly multiple times, he picks you up and carries you to the bedroom.

Tries to be gentle the first time, but ends up being rough anyway. He’s utterly enchanted, nay, enthralled by how you look, unraveling over and over again.

All because of him.

Nonetheless, John refuses to cum inside you until you’re on birth control and he has bought a box of proper condoms.

“It’s not that I don’t want to have sex with you or cum inside. Believe me, I do, every minute of the day. Drives me fucking mad, but,” he caresses your hair as he pries your legs away from his waist, ”I have to think about your health as well.”

You don’t protest, don’t want to after a soft kiss on the forehead and a husky “I’m sorry, love”. In response, you lightly squeeze his arm and shake your head. “Don’t apologise. I also won’t force you to do things you don’t want to do. Though it’s nice.”

“What is?”

“You looking out for me.”

“‘Course I do,” John snaps into you, picking up the pace again that has you seeing stars, “I’m your captain. Your man. Your bear.”

Those very words, combined with his warm presence, tips you over the edge.

A content echo of his name fills the room, rings in his ears as a satisfied sigh falls from your lips and tears stain your cheeks. It’s this image of chaotic beauty, of gorgeous ruination, which almost makes him break his promise. Nonetheless, after a few more sharp thrusts, he pulls out. Thick creamy white spurts draw an intricate pattern on your skin.

His mark.

John rests his forehead against yours, basking in the afterglow. “I love you.”

Today and the many days he hopes are ahead of you.

[simping-overload]

ᴀ ᴛɪᴇꜰʟɪɴɢꜱ ᴛᴀɪʟ - ᴄʟᴏᴛʜꜱ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛᴀɪʟ (ᴀꜱᴛᴀʀɪᴏɴ)

a/n: a tieflings tail is a 10+ chapter series involving bg3 men and a variety of scenarios with tiefling tavs tail

tags: gn tav, tailor astarion, fluff, 531 words

synopsis: Astarion makes you a sleeve for your tail to keep it warm during the winter months.

『read on ao3』

ヾthis is a multi-fandom blog that is designed for mlm/nbmlm identifying readers! so if you're female or fem please do not follow or interact with my mlm related post!! you will be blocked if you do not heed this warning ゛

Over the course of your adventures with your ever-growing group, Astarion appointed himself as the tailor. Stitching together any holes and tears, he’d find in someone’s clothing.

According to him, he refuses to allow himself to be seen with people who look like disgusting hobos.

He’s mainly self-taught, but after Halsin joined the party, he’s learning from him as well. Halsin himself was taught by his mother and, along the way, picked up more unconventional tricks when he looked after the children of the Emerald Grove.

You are his test dummy to try his newly found tricks on. Though, not only because you’re his lover, but because you’re usually the one who ends up with the most tears and holes in your clothes.

Just as you were now, standing in Astarions’ tent as he patches up your clothing. Some are from old tears, and others are from completely new ones in different places.

Astarion, per usual, grumbles out his disappointments. “By the gods’ love, can you ever just not rip your clothes to shreds anytime you leave camp?”

You suppress your shrug, wanting to avoid getting jabbed with a needle again. “Sorry, Star, we both know that isn’t possible.”

Astarion scoffs, rolling his eyes as he completes the last stitch. Stepping back, he tugs on the fabric, making sure his stitches are secure, and hopefully won’t be teared for at least another few weeks.

It doesn’t seem he’s done as when he stepped away to rummage through his belongings. You stay in your spot, tail curling in curiosity. He turns back around with a long piece of cloth in his hand.

“What’s that?”

“I’m not sure what to name it but, it’s for your tail. Since winter is nearing, I wanted to make you something for your tail. Just to keep you warm.”

You don’t have the heart to tell him that you don’t need one. Since you're a Tiefling, your body heat was more than enough to keep you warm during the winter months.

“Thank you, Star.”

He hummed in response, pulling the long sleeve up your tail and fastens so it won’t fall off. He left a small hole in the end for the tip of your tail to poke out, since you’ve told him before you don’t like that part of your tail being surrounded by anything since it’s the most sensitive there.

You looked at yourself in the mirror. It didn’t look bad at all. The color compliments your skin tone. Twirling and moving your tail around, you get a feel for it. It’s quite comfortable against your skin and were you more susceptible to the cold, you’d for sure be able to keep warm with this.

You hop down from the stool, turning to Astarion. “I like this a lot, love and rest assured I will keep it intact.”

Astarion snorts, grabbing your hand and pulls you to him. “You better, or I’ll make sure you wake up bloodless the next morning, hm?” He teases.

You fake an offended gasp. “You wouldn’t dare.” Leaning down, you press your forehead against his.

“Oh, love, but I would.” He giggles and places a soft kiss on your lips.

[nouearth]

joy-cons.

pairing ; barry allen x gn!reader. fandom: ; dc, the flash (cw) genre: ; fluff. rating ; pg. note ; it's been a while since i've written, so pls spare me the pain! just wanted to write a little drabble to start off my blog!

it took a lot of convincing for you to play mario party with barry. forty pleases and multiple interrogations on why you didn’t want to play to be exact.

are you scared? afraid you’ll lose again? come on, babe. i’ll go easy on you!

it’s not that you hated the game or anything. they’ve become a party favorite for years (except for the tenth game, we don’t talk about you) and you’ve always enjoyed how those games made you feel afterwards. whether you lost or won, cheated or played fair; mario party made you (and everyone) laugh and bond together, and you’ll always credit those games for bringing you and your family closer.

with your boyfriend… not so much.

“barry… listen…” you respond with an insecure smile, hesitant whether you should really bring this up with your boyfriend right now or suck it up and play a round if it makes him happy.

“oh no… are you still mad that i stole all your stars the last time? listen, we can play the other games! i’m sure one of them have an option to turn it off or something…” barry playfully rambles, his signature smile that made you fall in love with him still remaining. “which really defeats the purpose of the game, though. because then it becomes all vanilla and if everyone is given a fair chance-“

“barry- no.” you cut him off with a small peck to his lips, a gesture you often do whenever he goes on a tangent.

“then what is it?” he repeats the same gesture back, following up by leaning his forehead on yours to gaze into your eyes a little closer, his hold on your hands tightening to keep your balance and his upright.

“well… uh… okay, you know that mini-game where you have to button-mash the hammer into the little sand cactus thingies?” you describe the mini-game that made your thumbs sore in aftermath. in all honesty, you were great at it. until barry came along.

“the pokeys? yeah! you know i got a world record on that?”

“uh-huh. i was right there.” you lead him to the couch where both you and barry sit, reaching over to grab the red and yellow joy-cons on the table. “less than a millisecond…” you mutter to yourself.

“what about it?”

“well…” you clear your throat and open your palm that’s been holding the red joy-con for barry to take. “you broke them again.”

“oh- i can just pay you back, you know that-“

“no… barry. that’s not the problem! i’ve been noticing and this always happens whenever we play those type of mini games where we have to break our thumbs until they’re beating red!”

“hey! we don’t have to play those! we can skip and… and we can-“ barry fumbles over his words and you can tell something’s making him nervous. it’s quite comical, this entire situation. you weren’t mad, sad, disappointed, but suspicious.

“barry, did you even look at the joy-con.” you shut your lip tight, almost wanting to laugh, but remain serious as your boyfriend looks like he’s in a state of panic.

“wha-“ barry averts his eyes down to his palm. a singular joy-con, the one that he always uses whenever you guys play together, except it looks a little different than usual. “it doesn’t look broken to me- OOOOOH MY GOD.”

barry’s eyes register to a burnt joy-con. well, the other half of it. one side still maintains its signature red, but barely. he looks up at you with wide eyes and an expression akin to edvard munch’s the scream painting.

“yeah- can you tell me how you managed to smoke literally half of the controller? and out of all the games, it’s mario party?!” you take the controller back from his hand and examine it closely. one of the buttons is also smashed in. no wonder he had to get a different controller mid-round.

“listen- i don’t know how that happened! i mean, i told you i’ve been lifting more recently-“ barry attempts to grab the controller back from you as if withholding it would take any more suspicion off of him. the struggle has him rolling on top of you while both you and barry’s arms extend further away from each other.

“oh my god, barry. are we seriously doing this right now-“ you breathe out from under him.

“and that world record?! i blink once and suddenly you win first place with less than a millisecond to your name?! i’m not even sure if it registered how fast you were, barry.” you struggle through your words as he pushes his weight on top of your lungs in a continuing attempt to retrieve the joy-con, but a sigh of relief exhales when you drop the controller and barry rolls off of you.

“i’m good at games! great at them! i thought we talked about this, y/n!” you take a minute to catch your breath and watch barry desperately retrieve the joy-con as if his life depended on it.

“barry, you literally only win when we play those mini games-“ something catches your eye when he loops his finger through the joy-con’s wrist strap and the edge of the controller knocks an object out from under the couch.

another red joy-con.

you take a closer look and in midst, catch a glimpse of barry’s ‘oh shit face.’ before he could swipe it back under the couch, you hop off the couch next to him and crouch down, taking a closer look.

It’s burnt, just like the one you confronted barry about it. you pick it up and examine it with your hands. same damage.

“I can explain-“ you cut him off when you begin pushing the couch away. “oh my god, y/n. no, no, no, no!” he dramatically pleas, but barry knows he’s in too deep as what has been his worst kept secret, is finally revealed.

a clutter of broken joy-cons, all red with similar burnt marks and smashed in buttons reveal before you. it must’ve been at least fifty controllers scattered in a pile. at least four thousand dollars’ worth of product. he’s broken a few joy-cons before, which is why you brought it up to him in the first place… but that’s only been four or five times. not over fifty?! you could tell barry was in desperate need in saving money too because you also saw some third-party brands that resembled the joy-cons.

“okay, so… you aren’t going to believe me… but i have these amazing superpow-“

“barry..? w-what the hell?!”

© nouearth. please do not repost, plagiarize, or translate my works. and if you like this story, please reblog and leave a like!

[angelbarelywrites]

♡ scenarios | dating negan

♡ fandoms; The Walking Dead

♡ characters; Negan Smith

♡ reader; gender neutral

♡ cw; explicit sexual content

♡ notes; in case anyone forgot i’m technically not a dedicated slasher blog

i put this in sections so i didn’t have to make more than one post lol . also these take place while he’s still the ruler of the saviors. i’ve been obsessed since his first episode oh my god that’s eight years of hyperfixation so that’s usually where my brain goes plot- wise

i’m thinking Billy Butcher is up next? lmk who else we wanna see, Garcia Flynn from Timeless is probably too niche? but i love him so so much

•┈••✦ ❤ ✦••┈•

I. Kisses/PDA

> negan is an affectionate person

> with his wives it’s just for show- they’re hot, and he wants all his followers jealous of his lifestyle

> but with you, it’s different

> his wives don’t like him, per-se. he’s convenient to be married to and easy on the eyes, but they’re cold to him

> and he knows why, he doesn’t really give a shit. especially now that he has you.

> you may not be his spouse- you’re sure as fuck not letting him call you that without a ring- but he’s even more physical with you

> standing by him? hand on your back. sitting? you’re on his lap. look cold? he gives you his jacket and keeps you tucked under his arm

> “i just like takin’ care of you darlin’”

> and he loves kissing you in front of others- from little pecks to long, lingering kisses that makes other people look away

> he seems possessive, and he doesn’t mind people pointing it out

> it’s not that he doesn’t trust you- it’s never that

> he trusts most of his men too…maybe not simon. because simon loves staring at your ass

> but he’s proud. he’s proud you’re his, and he’s yours, and that he gets to show you off

> and like hell he ever lets anyone forget it

> alone he acts like keeping his hands off you is impossible

> he smacks your ass any time you lean over, pulls you into big bear hugs from behind and randomly pick you up

> he doesn’t ever want you to doubt his feelings for you, and physically is the easiest way for him to show it

> he’s very sexual, big shocker

> but his favorite kisses are sleepy kisses

> you wait late into the night when he’s due home from terrorizing his territories

> some part of you is afraid one day he won’t come home- so you always wait

> you’ll be exhausted, rubbing your eyes and yawning and usually wrapped up in a blanket

> but no matter how long he takes directing his men and double checking inventory and dealing with the dead

> “hey there, baby doll”

> you always run straight into his arms and bury your face in his chest. he’ll laugh and pick you up, kissing you gently before he carries you to bed

> most times he falls asleep on top of the covers with you, eager for the morning when he can make it up to you for being gone so long

II. Sharing a bed

> negan isn’t used to sharing a bed anymore

> the wives have their own rooms just down the hall, and so do you

> no reason for him not to give you at least a little space

> and having a room is the height of luxury in the sanctuary anyways. it’s a perk of dating the boss

> but you don’t know how to tell him you do want to share a bed, even though you’re barely apart when you’re awake

> so you just…don’t. you assume it’s a boundary he wants to keep and don’t mention it

> until the night terrors start up again

> you’ve seen a lot of people die a lot of different ways. most of them people you cared a lot about

> the memories always seem to come back in your dreams no matter how far back you push them

> when you’re woken up by one in the middle of a harsh storm, it’s just a bit too much

> you just can’t stop crying, and it’s loud and you need held. you need him.

> you creep as quietly as you can down the hall, and you hesitate at the door until the thunder crashes again

> when you stumble in he sits up fast with a knife in his fist

> then he gives a slightly annoyed sigh in recognition, relaxing

> “the hell are you doing?”

> “i just- um-“

> you can tell he notices the wobble in your voice and opens his arms up without another smart remark

> “hey, hey, i’ve gotcha..”

> he doesn’t ask questions- you don’t cry for nothing. and he gets nightmares too

> falling asleep in his arms feels natural…so natural it becomes a habit

> and he sleeps better with you too, curled around you and holding you so tight you think he might be worried you’ll disappear

> it’s less than a week before you stop using your bed altogether

III. Let’s get kinky

> he’s happy in pretty much any dominant role, whatever you call him is good enough for him- daddy, sir, master, etc

> and he likes when you call him whatever it is in front of his men

> the only chance of getting your dick/strap in him is if he power bottoms. but 95 percent of the time? you’re receiving and it’s big

> he likes being risky. he’ll take you out to visit settlements just to have an excuse to stop and fuck you in the car

> or even in a house there, just a room over from his men and gagging you with his fingers so you don’t get caught

> not that he’ll care if they catch you anyways

> he has a nice big office- half of the reason he uses it is so he can have you on his lap as a cockwarmer while he reads or looks over inventory numbers

> the other half is so you can suck his dick under the desk while he talks to simon or dwight

> (simon is a raging pervert so he definitely knows, too)

> he loves fucking your face, watching you get all teary eyed and drooling all over yourself from taking his massive cock

> “oh look at the fuckin’ mess you’re making!”

> he’s generous though- he loves reciprocating oral

> and he loves overstimulating you too- whether that’s by edging you for hours or just making you cum again and again and again

> he loves taking you from behind, pushing your face into the mattress and gripping your hips so hard they bruise

> but he also loves when you ride him slow, gasping quietly as he watches you fall apart completely for him

[1dmonthlyficroundup]

— 1D Monthly Fic Roundup —

Hi, and welcome to the 1D Monthly Fic Roundup for June 2024! Below you’ll find 1D fics that were all published this month. We hope you’ll check out these new fics! If you would like to submit your own fic, please check this post on how to submit or visit our blog @1dmonthlyficroundup​. You can find all our other posts here.

Happy reading!

＊ Like A Force Of Nature by @reminiscingintherain [T, 30k, Zayn/Liam]

“Yes, that’s it. You’re sat over by the window, next to Liam Payne. He’s in Year 10, so a year below you. I’m sure you’ll find lots to talk about though.” Zayn sighed and turned slowly, looking in the direction that Mr Murs had pointed. Sat at a table, with his arms folded as he gazed out of the window – which just so happened to have a sudden shaft of sunlight shining through to surround him, making him appear angelic in the watery winter beams – was a solid-looking lad. As though hearing his name, he turned to face Zayn, a curious and seemingly hopeful expression on his face. Zayn took a deep breath and manoeuvred his way through the tables and chairs, shrugging out of his bag and dropping it carefully to the floor as he took his seat. “Hi,” said Liam, giving him a friendly smile. “Hi…” Zayn replied, feeling like his insides had melted into goo at the simple word. Well, shit.

Or; the Heartstopper AU no one asked for.

＊ Pay It Forward by @reminiscingintherain [M, 3k, Zayn/Louis]

Zayn's agreed to be a sperm donor for his lesbian friends. Louis' his best friend, and he supports Zayn's decision... right?

＊ I Can Only Hold You by @lululawrence [NR, 8k, Louis/Jordan North]

Louis closed his eyes, genuinely concerned that the omega was not just teetering on the edge of depri, but had already fallen fully into it. “How long has it been since you’ve had any stimms in your system at all?”

“Hmm? Oh, uh…” Jordan went quiet for a moment. “Not sure. My brain feels kind of foggy, Lou. But it’s been since probably Wednesday? Maybe?”

“Wednesday of this week?” Louis asked hopefully. If it had only been a matter of days, this might be withdrawal symptoms from the stimms and not full on touch deprivation.

“No, Wednesday of last week. I think. It might actually have been the week before? Oh god, that’s really bad, isn’t it?”

When Louis learns Jordan is close to falling into depri, he rushes over to help. What follows is so much more than either of them planned for.

＊ You Just Be Yourself by @lululawrence [NR, 13k, Harry/Louis]

“Thanks, Mom.”

Louis’ breath was knocked right out of him at those words, and Grey froze. They then immediately pulled out of Louis’ arms and scurried out of sight before either Harry or Louis could respond.

“Shit,” Harry cursed quietly, looking between Louis and where Grey had disappeared.

“I…” Louis blinked and looked down at the boxes still scattered on the floor. By the time he had gathered them back up, Harry was also gone.

Or five times Harry's daughter claims Louis as her mother, and one time Louis claims them both as his too.

＊ call me any, anytime by @disgruntledkittenface [E, 2k, Louis/Harry]

Harry’s plans for the night are interrupted by an unexpected FaceTime call.

＊ Feelin' So Good Right Now by YesIsAWorld / @louandhazaf [E, 1k, Harry/Louis]

Louis, a just-turned vampire, enjoys his enhanced touch sensation.

＊ Pick Someone Supportive by @enchantedlandcoffee [G, 333 words, Louis/Harry]

Louis sighed and turned to look at Harry, the other boy laughing at something Zayn had said on the phone. "He's just- way out of my league, you know? Besides, I'm pretty sure he doesn't like me like that. Having him as a friend is more than enough."

OR The one where there may be a chance for romance in Harry and Louis' future after all.

＊ I wish you would've cheated (but you smashed my heart to pieces) by @enchantedlandcoffee [T, 292 words, Louis & Zayn, Louis/Harry]

“Lou, what happened?” Zayn whispered, entering the room and climbing onto the bed straight away. He immediately laid on his side, face to face with his friend. “He doesn't love me, Zee,” Louis replied, voice cracking and tears pooling in his eyes as Zayn pulled him into his arms.

Or Zayn didn't quite know what to expect when his best friend had begged him to come over, but the last thing he did expect was a heartbroken Louis and a convieniently missing Harry.

＊ Scarred by @allwaswell16 [E, 23k, Louis/Harry]

As a male omega, Louis has learned to live with disappointment and rejection, but he dreams of the day he finds his soulmate. When Harry inadvertently rejects him as his soulmate, Harry has no idea he's doomed Louis to a slow, painful death.

Pride doesn't keep Louis from telling Harry the truth. But love does.

＊ The Tiniest Moves by @allwaswell16 [T, 1k, Louis/Nick Grimshaw]

Coffee shop owner Nick Grimshaw may or may not have come to work on his day off in the hopes that fresh-off-his-world-tour Louis Tomlinson might stop by.

＊ It's You by @allwaswell16 [T, 2k, Louis/Louis]

Five times alpha Louis talks to omega Lou and one time he admits he wants more from his omega clone

＊ Don’t Embarrass Me, Motherfucker by @allwaswell16 [T, 1k, Harry/Louis]

Harry comes home from work to find Louis and their parrot are up to something. A Darcy the Parrot time stamp

Part 2 of That's How I Know

＊ Counting Lipstick Stains Where You Should Be by larry_hiatus / @larry-hiatus [E, 6k, Harry/Louis]

Louis doesn’t know how he ended up with Harry’s makeup after they split, but pretty soon he’s got lipstick on his mouth and black-tipped fingers wrapped around himself as he contemplates all that he lost. Part 2 of Played With Myself (Where Were You?)

＊ Remember Me As A Time Of Day by @justanothershadeofblue [E, 67k, ot5]

It's the 20th anniversary of the One Direction hiatus, and the powers that be have decided that it's time for a reunion tour, and ideally, an album. Can five middle-aged lads thrust into a house in the middle of nowhere to make music sort out two decades worth of hurts, grudges, and resentments and come together with enough love to make a show - and a relationship - that works?

＊ (on the edge until) you pull me in by @justanothershadeofblue [E, 3k, Louis/Harry]

Louis brings his hands up to rub at his eyes. The light from the streetlight is painting his room in pale halogen yellow and grey. A car zips by in the night, the sound of tires across damp asphalt a comforting constant.

He sets aside the details, and imagines it again. A faceless man. A rich one. Gay, also, obviously, or at least queer. Maybe he’d have a nice voice, Louis always did like a nice voice. Deep, maybe slow and deliberate to contrast with Louis’ own tendency toward high-pitched chattering.

He’d have to smell good, Louis’s always been picky about how his dates smelled. Not that he’s had all that many in the first place, but it’s something he’s always cared about. A full head of hair, too, that’s important. Maybe some curls.

Louis lets a hand run down his chest. His dick is not about to fall off, thank you very much, Niall, but it has been a while since he’s had time for a wank. He doesn’t really have time now – he’s got to get up in three and half hours and get breakfast, but oh well. It’ll feel good enough to be worth the extra lost sleep.

＊ Your A-Team, Your Endgame by @silverkiiwii [E, 70k, Harry/Louis]

Harry and Louis work like a well oiled machine, completely in sync when it comes to their designing and working together but as soon as the curtains are down, they hate each other's guts.

Partnered together and forced to work as a team, will the off-camera tensions bleed on-camera? And when the stakes are as high as two hundred and fifty thousand dollars, can they afford to let that happen?

Or a Next In Fashion au where Louis and Harry are partnered in the competition but they do not get along when they have to if they want to win. Full of fashion, banter, misunderstanding and a whole lot of making each other blush.

＊ everything of mine is yours by @blueskiesrry [E, 33k, Louis/Harry]

"Did you two have a good time?”

Harry in his bathroom, brushing his teeth with frizzy hair and tired eyes. Harry on the couch cuddled up with Posy, cradling her in the crook of his elbow, humming a soft song. Harry laughing with his friends in a pub on a Friday night, a flower field in his eyes. Harry in his bed tucked under the covers, naked against fresh sheets like a shock of moonlight cutting through a storm.

“Yeah,” he says. “We did.”

or: With Harry in New York finishing up his PhD and Louis in London working as a solicitor, they try to navigate their eight year situationship including almost-daily phone calls, the occasional indulgence of casual phone sex, and endless gossip sessions as the feelings they have for each other get harder to ignore.

＊ Slippery When Wet by yeah_alright / @uhoh-but-yeah-alright [E, 3k, Harry/Louis, Harry/Zayn, Zayn & Louis]

Harry has a habit of hot tubbing topless, to both the delight and dismay of her housemates Louis and Zayn. When it gets to be too much for Louis one day, she flees to her room to take care of herself, only to be surprised by Zayn showing up in her doorway and suggesting they take mutual advantage of Louis' view of the back garden where Harry's still enjoying her hot tub time.

In which Louis finds out the only thing hotter than Harry is getting off a few feet from a good friend who finds her just as overwhelming.

＊ do not want this show to end by yeah_alright / @uhoh-but-yeah-alright [E, 2k, Louis/Steve Durham]

Louis's obsessing over his vocal performance after his For Every Question Why Livestream show. Steve helps him take his mind off it.

＊ Louis and the no good, very bad day by @haztobegood [E, 4k, Louis/Harry]

Tap, tap. Honk!

Louis sits up quick. Over by the sliding glass door that leads to his small balcony, a white goose with bright orange beak taps at the glass.

Honk!

Louis collapses back into the bed with a groan. Just when he thought his day couldn’t get any worse, there’s a fucking goose stuck on his balcony.

＊ Figure This Out by @haztobegood [E, 2k, Louis/Harry]

Louis is everything Harry could have imagined when he’d typed “silver fox enthusiast” into his Grindr profile. Too bad he's probably scared Louis off by giving him too many expensive gifts.

＊ Lost But Won by @2tiedships2 [NR, 16k, Harry/Louis]

“If you start out by talking about your weekend of golfing I swear to god I will stab you with a pen,” Louis said by way of greeting. “You’ll have to give me a few minutes though so I can see if I even own a pen. But the warning stands.”

“Hello to you too, dearest Louis,” Niall yelled from where he still sat on the couch next to Harry.

There was a clunk on the floor and what sounded like shoes hitting the wall as Niall announced, “We have a guest. You might want to save stabbing me until you don’t have a witness.”

“Well if they are obsessed with golf then…” Louis trailed off as he made his appearance in the living room.

Harry’s mouth dried up. This was not the alpha that Niall had described.

When Harry loses his passport after a weekend trip to see Niall, the inconvenience of being stranded in America becomes a little more bearable after meeting Louis. Or a lot more bearable.

＊ Fiction, Future & Predictions by sweetkalachuchi / @neverforpickles [G, 2k, Louis/Harry]

“It had been a warm Sunday morning when Harry went for his stroll.”

— Harry Styles is in love with Louis Tomlinson.

＊ We Are World Class by Blue_Green28 / @bluegreen28fics [E, 50k, Louis/Harry]

In the midst of Louis' divorce, Harry and Louis have to keep their relationship a secret. When Harry falls pregnant, they find that this is not as easy as one might think.

or, the footballer!Louis & actor!Harry AU where everyone is way too interested in their sex life.

＊ I'll Still Feel the Same Around You by @crinkle-eyed-boo [E, 2k, Harry/Louis]

He finds himself wishing that the bedsheet would slip down a few more inches so he could get a good look at Harry’s perfectly pert–

Louis’ breath hitches as his cock stirs, suddenly very interested in this train of thought.

Oh.

Oh.

The answer to all of Louis’ troubles is so fucking obvious he can’t believe he didn’t think of it until now.

Nothing puts him to sleep like a good orgasm.

Louis finds the cure for his insomnia in the form of his husband.

＊ Miracle Massages by red_panda28 / @red-pandaaa [T, 3k, Louis/Harry]

It took some effort, but Harry finally got his mouth to cooperate. “Wanna take a bath,” he mumbled.

“Alright.” There was a small pause. “Are you gonna move?” Louis asked, the amused smile audible in the question.

OR Alpha Louis pampering his pregnant Omega, Harry. Featuring nests, a sprinkle of angst, and belly massages. part of a series but can be read independently. Part 4 of Becoming Family

＊ You've Got A Friend In Me by red_panda28 / @red-pandaaa [E, 2k, Harry/Louis]

The preview showed a WhatsApp from Harry, saying ‘you’ve got a friend in me’. While Louis was still looking, a second text appeared, simply the smirking emoji.

Confused, he swiped the app open to reply.

Louis: are you suggesting we watch toy story?

Harry: not quite

Louis: ???

OR Harry sends a naughty picture while Louis is at work and phone sex ensues

＊ Sugar, Sugar by @parmahamlarrie [E, 25k, Louis/Harry]

Meeting your soulmate was the most joyous event of one’s life… or at least, it’s supposed to be. Harry, in all of his 25 year old wisdom, was suspicious of the role fate plays in everyone's lives. He'd rather focus his time dating older men he meets off of a sugar baby website.

Louis isn’t waiting with bated breath for his soulmate either. He has more important things to worry about than love. Mainly, his career as a writer, publishing under a pseudonym. He spends most of the year buried under research and manuscripts, taking as much time as he would like, much to his publishers' chagrin. After receiving many millions after the death of his Aunt Ethel when he was young, he technically never has to work again. As far as soulmates go, he figures if it happens, he will be so old that he’ll be stuck in his ways. Or he’ll have grey eyes forever, he doesn’t fucking care. He can get his needs met through a sugar baby website.

Or… The Sugar baby soulmate AU

＊ Come On and Rescue Me by @kingsofeverything [E, 3k, Harry/Louis]

Louis only intends to watch his hot neighbor’s Instagram live, but he winds up with his hand down his pants.

＊ Tossing Round Like Coins by LetTheMusicMoveYou / @letthemusicmoveyou28 [E, 25k, Louis/Harry]

“No, no it’s fine.” Louis rubs the back of his neck a little awkwardly. “I guess I’m just not used to hearing another alpha talking about taking a knot is all. You caught me off guard a bit, but I don’t mind.”

Harrys look of embarrassment soon morphs into a smirk. “Not a lot of knot talk in the locker rooms then?”

Louis laughs. “Oh yeah there is. But it’s more like arguments over whose is bigger and that.” He schools his face into what he hopes is an over exaggerated, self-righteous expression. “But not me of course, because I’m proper evolved.”

Harry snorts out a laugh. “Of course you are.”

(Or the one where Louis is an alpha who does manly alpha things like play professional football and lift weights at the gym, where he meets alpha Harry who wears nail polish and dates other alphas. Louis isn’t put off by Harry’s strange tendencies, more like intrigued. And maybe just maybe, he’s interested).

＊ Body Stay Vicious by LetTheMusicMoveYou / @letthemusicmoveyou28 [E, 5k, Harry/Louis]

Harry looks at himself in the mirror again, and gasps at what he sees.

The way his sweaty curls are sticking to his forehead while his bare and glistening chest is practically heaving out breaths as he stands in the middle of the otherwise empty gym with his hand down his shorts working over his length.

It makes a filthy picture. He moans into the empty space, and it echos off the cement walls.

Or maybe not so empty.

Suddenly there is a raspy voice from over Harry’s shoulder.

“Can’t say I’ve ever done that particular exercise in the gym. Guess I’ve been working out wrong.”

Harry looks up in horror, and through the mirror, he locks eyes with none other than the blue-eyed stranger he’s been fantasizing about this whole time.

(Or the one where Harry is feeling himself in the gym and gets a little carried away. Of course his gym crush just happens to walk in. They work it out).

- Podfics -

＊ [Podfic] Swipe Right for a Clean Flat by @lululawrence read by Panda_Podfics (red_panda28) / @pandapodfics [NR, Louis/Harry]

Harry was done. He was over this shit. He literally only asked his flatmate to do one chore, and that was the washing up. He couldn’t even handle a few plates and cups. Harry obviously overestimated him.

Louis wasn’t that bad. It was just that he only did the washing if he was going out to pull and wanted to bring someone home. If the dishes were put away, that was how Harry knew to vacate the premises. There was no way he was going to listen to yet another girl moan Louis’ name while Harry laid in bed and wondered what it might be like if only Louis liked men.

Glaring at the full sink and debating washing up himself - again - Harry finally turned and stalked to his room.

“Dire circumstances,” Harry muttered as he picked up his phone and unlocked it.

Or the one where Harry and Louis are flatmates and Harry is tired of Louis not doing the washing up. He figures signing up on Tinder as a hot girl might be just the fix for this issue.

＊ [podfic] Season 3, Episode 5: (now I realize that the world outside) it's bigger than me [a fic by we_are_the_same] by podfic_pals / @podfic-pals [T, Louis/no pairing]

It starts with a phone call from Liam.

“Lou,” it sounds urgent, the way that Liam gets when he’s worried, and Louis sits up straighter, conditioned to that tone even when he had hated it the first few years in the band.

“What’s wrong?” he asks, his brain immediately trying to play catch up, wondering where his keys are and if he can get away with leaving the house without a shower, because it doesn’t matter how long it’s been, it doesn’t matter how much physical distance there is between them, if any of his boys call and need him he’ll be there in a heartbeat. Or as soon as he can, at least.

“Did you mean to post that to your public account?”

Or: Louis accidentally comes out

[lavendertales]

SEÑORITA: Chapter 7**

pairing: Javier Peña x Murphy!f!reader

summary: following your fallout with Steve, you find yourself on Javier's doorstep.

word count: 6.4k (oops)

series warnings: reluctant friends to lovers, lots of playful banter, mutual pining, slow burn, secret relationship, filthy smut.

chapter warnings: face sitting, body worship, piv (safe).

A/N: here we are ya'll, the long awaited explosion of the slow burn hehehe. thank you so much for all the comments and the love, it means so much to me 💕I hope you'll enjoy this chapter as well, and feedback is always much appreciated!

AGELESS/EMPTY BLOGS & MINORS WILL BE BLOCKED!

series masterlist | AO3

You would’ve preferred to sit down inside your apartment in order to have this conversation rather than wander aimlessly on the hot streets of New York at almost midnight with your brother, but the surroundings are less important than the issue at hand.

Steve offered to buy frozen yogurt for the two of you, and fight as you might, you were persuaded to eat a little bowl of strawberry cold goodness. The two of you sat down at this little place on the corner, both clearly too uptight to initiate the conversation. So you clear your throat, exhaling slowly and steadily, and braced yourself.

“Steven—“

“I’m sorry.”

He blurts out the words as he stares at you, his eyes big and regretful.

“I’m so sorry for not supporting you more,” he continues, putting down the spoon. “And for not taking more of an interest in your hobby. It clearly means so much to you and I… I know I was a dickhead.”

“If you’re waiting for me to disagree it’s not going to happen.”

Steve chuckles, huffing.

“It’s more than a hobby, Steve,” you tell him. “In an ideal world where money wouldn’t be a thing, this would be my dream job. I’d do nothing else but write, travel and eat food all over the world. It’s why I took a job at the library. It’s the closest I’ll ever be to achieving that dream.”

“That makes me sad.”

“Made me sad too. But this is reality, and denying it won’t do me any favors.”

“You were always so much more mature and rational than me.”

Surprised, you make a face at him, unable to contain yourself. You’ve never heard such words from your brother.

“Me?” you say with a light chuckle escaping from your lips. “The eternal dreamer?”

“Yeah. Sure, you like to picture fictional worlds and get lost in them but you never lose sense of reality. You’re neither optimistic nor pessimistic. You just… live in the now.”

“You know… I’m actually really close to getting my own book published.”

Steve’s eyes widen further, his face revealing nothing but sheer excitement at this point, and the sight softens you; so much so that you smile involuntarily, rather flustered to finally share this news with him.

“That’s amazing, I’m so happy for you!” he nearly shouts.

“Thanks, thanks. You’re the third person I tell this to.”

“Third?”

“Javier and Sylvie know.”

“Oh. I see. Is it based on Star Wars? Or inspired by it?”

You frown. “No, you doofus, it’s my own story. If I were to publish a fanfiction for Star Wars, I’d definitely get sued by George Lucas.”

“Kind of defeats the point of writing it, doesn’t it?”

As happy as you felt a minute ago, you feel just as dumbfounded now.

“The point, again, is creativity,” you reply. “You start from there and you build towards your own independent stories.”

“Isn’t it a waste of time? I mean why not start right at—“

“Oh my God! You’ve been this way since we were kids. You always thought you’re superior, whether you realized it or not.”

“I didn’t. And I didn’t mean to insult—“

“You never mean to and yet you still do.”

Steve watches you stand up, hands on your hips and munching on your lower lip in what can only be described as anger finally bubbling up at the surface.

“Mom and dad always sung your praises because you chose to do things logically and fit into society while I was a bitter disappointment for spending time alone in my room, reading and writing,” you say. “You finished high school and went straight to the Academy and mom and dad couldn’t have been prouder. Me? I finished high school and went to study literature in college and it still wasn’t good enough.”

“Nobody ever said that, you know it’s not true.”

“They didn’t have to say it. I could see it in their eyes, the way they spoke. I was the weirdo who needed a social life while you were their beloved Steven, making his way into the real world at such a young age, being so brave. Mom and dad never stopped thinking there’s something wrong with me and they didn’t hesitate in telling me that with every chance they got. Passive aggressively but still.”

“There’s nothing wrong with you.”

“I know. I know that now. It took years of therapy to realize that.”

Steve watches you closely, filled with unrelenting guilt. He’s never seen you this decisive and mad, but he knows deep down he’s had it coming. All of the things he wished for your relationship are slowly going down the drain and he begins to fear that if he doesn’t say the right thing now and try his hardest to be here for you, he will lose you forever.

“I never meant to treat you any way other than with respect,” he says, his voice oddly hoarse. “I know I’m pushing things a lot of the time and I exaggerate and I have no right to intervene in your personal life, but it only comes from a place of needing to protect you.”

“I can protect myself, Steven.”

He huffs, grabbing your wrist and thus urging you to sit back down. “Do you remember in seventh grade when that group of idiots picked on you while you were reading on the playground? It rained heavily the day before and they snatched the book from your hands and threw it into a puddle, ruining it.”

“Yeah, I—I remember.”

“And then you told me that one of them, the bigger one, came onto you that same afternoon and forcefully kissed you. I had him suspended.”

“What—how?”

“I may have… broke his nose and threatened him to worse if he didn’t go to the principal’s office to confess to both forcing himself onto you and to bullying you.”

“Oh my—you never told me that.”

Steve shrugs. “Pretty sure that was the moment I started to be mindful of the guys that were around you. And when you got annoyed and purposely started dating the worst guys you could find, things have gotten wild.”

“You can say that again.”

You both chuckle.

“You know, the fact that you confided in Javi about your book before me or Connie is a bit hurtful,” Steve admits.

“Do you know why I told Javier first? Even before Sylvie? Because he asked me. It’s that simple. He took an interest in my passion and he actually cared about it. Hell, he turned my Star Wars story into a real book. He made it into a book just for me because he knows how much it means to me, and how much writing means to me.”

“He what?”

You nod. “Yeah. He didn’t mock me, he didn’t assume he knows better than me. He even encouraged me to keep going, which is how I’m close to finishing the editing part of my book faster than I anticipated. And this from a guy who was a complete stranger to me three months ago. You keep saying that Javier is your best friend but you don’t seem to treat him that way. You treat him like he’s bad news, like you didn’t go through all that shit together in Colombia. You need to get your shit together. Javier is a really good man. A good friend, and an overall good person.”

“I know he is, I’m just worried about him too like I’m worried about you. He hasn’t been the same since we came back from Colombia. It changed him in ways that I… I don’t know. I have Connie and Olivia and I feel so lucky but… he keeps to himself. He barely allows anyone in so I don’t know what it’s like inside his head. I was just so worried that you’d both rush into something you might not be ready for and end up hurting each other.”

You don’t realize you’ve been holding your breath for quite some time, but you certainly hadn’t felt the need to breathe, not in this moment when years of anger and misunderstandings culminate in the most honest sentences either of you have ever spoken to each other.

“Even if we did rush into a relationship or casual dating or whatever, it still wouldn’t be your call to make,” you remind him. “It’s not your decision, it’s mine and his. We’re both adults, tip-toeing around each other and around you because you have this weird protection fetish.”

“It’s not—“

“You know what I meant.”

“I—I’m really sorry, sis. I just wanted us to be closer. I went the wrong way about it, I know that.”

“You did. Trying to intimidate your best friend and controlling whoever your baby sister is around is not the way to go about this. You pulled the same shit in high school and look how that turned out.”

“I was worried about you, about both of you.”

“And you had reasons to, I’ll give you that. But now there is none. I’m okay. And Javier can talk if he feels like it.”

“You don’t know him the way I do.”

“Maybe not. But you don’t know him like I do, either.”

Steve calls out your name once you get ready to leave.

“Whom I date is none of your business,” you retort. “Not even if that someone was your best friend. Which is not. So cut it out already and get your shit together. If you can’t accept this, then leave me the hell alone.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I appreciate it. And I appreciate what you did for me that time in the seventh grade. I really do. But I need some time before I can truly forgive you.”

Javier hadn’t expected the erratic knock on the door at this hour, and he certainly hadn’t expected to be met with the sight in his doorway.

You look just as lovely as ever, though you do seem to be a little tense. He doesn’t ask; instead, he looks you over and welcomes you inside, waiting for you to offer some explanation for your late visit, already perilous enough as it is.

“I know it’s late, I’m sorry,” you coo. “I just—this was the first place I thought of. Didn’t wanna be alone in my apartment.”

“It’s okay. What happened?”

“Why do you assume something happened? Can’t a friend pay a visit to another friend?”

“They can, but not with that expression on their face.”

“What expression?”

“You look like you’ve been run over.”

You frown, distancing yourself from him even further.

“I’m your friend, I should be able to tell you this without a problem,” Javier adds.

“No, you sure can. Thank you for the fine observation.”

“Glad I could be of service. Do you want a drink?”

Say no, your mind screams at you, almost begs. You shouldn’t be drinking, not when you’re feeling vulnerable after the raw conversation you’ve had at long last with your brother, and certainly not around Javier.

It’s not that you don’t trust yourself. You know what you can and can’t handle.

You’re simply afraid the liquor might provide you with the courage to finally tell him exactly what’s on your mind, and that you might end up being rejected. Something tells you Javier might choose loyalty and rationality over his feelings.

He keeps to himself, Steve told you.

“Little bit of whiskey would be nice if you have it,” you eventually reply, catching both Javier and yourself off guard.

“Didn’t know you drink whiskey.”

“I don’t. Not really. Only when I need something really strong.”

“I take it the conversation with Steve didn’t go that well then.”

Fucking hell, how does he do this? How does he intuit things about you without you even saying or hinting them?

“It did. I think,” you smile as a glass of amber liquid is being handed to you. “We talked things through, I told him my piece… he apologized. And he meant it, I could tell.”

“He’s an honest guy, and he means well.”

“I know he does. He only ever wanted to be there for his baby sister and to be a good friend, but he’s taken things too far. Which he’s acknowledged.”

“Color me intrigued and shocked.”

You smile, hiding the gesture in the glass and stealing a glance at Javier. An unfamiliar warmth surrounds you, wraps you in a blanket of confusion and longing that you’re certain you haven’t felt up until now.

“So how come you ended up here then?”

“I don’t know. I just… stormed off, told him I appreciate his apology but I need some time before I can fully forgive him.”

“While we’re at it…” Javier clears his throat, lowering his now empty glass, “I’m sorry too.”

“For what?”

“For everything.”

“You didn’t cause this.”

“I feel like I kind of did mess things up though. I’m quite good at it.”

“Javier…”

“What?”

You lower your glass too, reaching out to take his hand which he hesitantly accepts. “You’re not a bad guy. In no way, shape or form. Trust me on this. I know them pretty well. And you don’t fit in that category.”

When you smile at him, so sincere and bright, Javier pulls back his hand, chugging the rest of whiskey and focusing solely on the way it burns his throat.

And yet when he thinks of the way his body feels when you’re around you, that all-too-familiar burn is nothing compared to it.

“If I wouldn’t have taken this job, maybe things wouldn’t have been this way between you and Steve,” Javier mutters.

“Things between me and Steve have been rocky for years. They would’ve probably continued to be tense if you hadn’t pushed us to talk. Involuntarily, of course. And besides, if you wouldn’t have taken the job… I wouldn’t have met you.”

“I don’t know anyone whose life was better for having known me.”

“There is someone I can think of.”

Javier briefly gazes at you and quickly wishes he’d evaporate. It feels too much, far too consuming to even maintain eye contact with you on account of all the fear, the impossible yearning, the confusion and the—

No. stop it. This is not that.

“Anyway,” you resume, feeling a bit short of breath yourself, “I don’t think Steve wanted me to meet you in the first place.”

“That kinda makes me wanna get back at him.”

“Me too. And you know what would show him?”

Javier raises his brow, already anticipating and dreading the answer before it ever leaves your mouth.

“If we hooked up,” you smile wickedly.

He cocks an eyebrow, his interest peaked and his stomach all twisted in knots. “That so?”

“Mhm. We could let him stew in doubt, let him guess.”

“How would we pull that off?”

“Well, since we already agreed actually doing it is out of the question, a light touch on the arm when we’re all together, gazing at each other from afar, smiling… a kiss on the cheek, stuff like that.”

Javier has no idea when he finds himself in your close proximity again. All he knows is that he’s sitting on the chair next to you, leaning in yet again, cursing his own inner demons for fighting a losing battle, and his breaths betraying his restlessness.

“The buildup to a kiss is the best part,” he coos, and you swear you shiver for a second. “One of them, anyway.”

“Is it though?”

“Yes. What kind of jackasses did you date in the past? Jesus Christ.”

“The worst I could find.”

Against his better judgment—if there was any of it left—Javier chuckles, forcing himself to look at you.

“The moment you look into each other’s eyes and lean in, that’s where it all starts. It’s simple but it’s really powerful stuff. Heart beats faster. Breaths get shallower. At some point your eyes sort of drift away to the other’s lips, wondering what they taste and feel like. And then, when you finally feel bold enough to lean in more…”

You close your eyes, Javier’s faintly whiskey-infused breath all warm and tingly over your lips, and you wait. What you receive in return is a phone ringing though, so you instantly pull away, opening your eyes again and noticing the same expression on Javier’s face as you assume is on yours: desperation.

“I—“he starts, but you shush him immediately.

“It’s okay.”

We shouldn’t anyway, you think.

“Hello?” Javier practically groans into the telephone. “Hey, Con.”

You turn towards him on instinct, curious about the subject matter between the two, though you shouldn’t be; you know exactly what this is about, and at this late hour nonetheless.

“No,” Javier answers in an unusually dark and steady voice, eyes locked on your figure. “She’s not here.”

You look at him, utterly taken aback, and you gulp.

“Have you at least heard from her?” Connie inquires at the other end, unbeknownst to you. “She had a talk or a fight or something with Steve and now he’s worried. He says he called her apartment, went there and there’s no answer. It’s a whole thing.”

“I haven’t heard from her.”

“Javi…”

“Look, Con, with all due respect and care, she’s a grown woman and Murphy needs to stop babying her. She’s perfectly capable of making her own choices and seems to me that right now she doesn’t want to be found. So whatever you think it is that I’m doing…”

“I’m not thinking anything. Should I?”

“We’re… friends.”

“Have you noticed that whenever you say that, the pause between ‘we’ and ‘friends’ gets bigger?”

Javier frowns and blinks several times in a row, dumbfounded. “What?”

“It started out as ‘oh, we’re friends’ but now it’s more along the lines of ‘oh. We’re… sigh… friends’.”

“I sound nothing like that.”

“Javi. Come on.”

“I told you, Con. She’s not here tonight. Wherever she is, I’m sure she’s fine. She just wants to be left alone for a bit.”

“Well if you hear from her—“

“Yeah. Goodnight, Connie.”

Javier hangs up, frozen in the same spot. He knows that now there is no going back and that he’s in deep shit, but truthfully he only gives a damn about your well-being.

Everything else is tomorrow’s problem.

“You lied,” you coo.

“Fine observation skills.”

“Thank you.”

Javier stares at the ground, processing his own words and thoughts. Ever since he left Colombia, he’s all but tried to always do the right thing, the honorable thing and be a respectable man in today’s society. Not the Javier that worked with one of the most gruesome groups in the world for the greater cause, not Javier that bent the American embassy’s rules to fit into his scenarios, but a new Javier that was good and learned from his mistakes.

And now, every time he looks at you, he feels himself falling deeper into temptation, on the verge of making another mistake. Only this one might not be so easy to fix.

“Don’t thank me,” he mutters, pacing around the living room. “It was stupid and selfish. Obviously Connie knows you’re here and Steve’s gonna know and the whole thing’s gonna blow up in my fucking face.”

You notice him purposely avoiding your eyes and you reckon by the edgy way he’s marching through the living room that there are dozens of things on his mind now, if not more.

“Javier.”

No answer, more pacing.

“Javier, look at me.”

Still no answer, slightly less pacing.

“Why aren’t you looking at me? A minute ago you couldn’t stop looking at me when we were about to—“

“We were about to do nothing.”

“Right. I just—“

Then, Javier turns to you so abruptly it startles you for a second. You watch him walk towards you with a look on his face that you can’t quite put together. But it doesn’t intimidate you, nor does it scare you. On the contrary: it rather makes you want to hold him and be with him.

“What the hell are you doing to me?” he murmurs, his chocolate, soft eyes now glued to yours.

“I’m not—I’m not doing any—“

“No, you’re fucking consuming me. Eating me alive from inside out. And looking at you… whenever I look at you, I feel my promise to Steve break. I feel myself break, I feel… I feel the way I did back in Colombia, all fucked up and twisted and you don’t deserve that.”

“You never talk about it. Colombia.”

Javier purses his lips, holding his breath. “Sometimes it feels like I never left. Like it’s hell all around me. But then I think I can’t possibly be in hell cause you wouldn’t be there otherwise.”

Your heart flutters in your chest, your cheeks scorch with flattery and your body only craves more.

“Instead, you’re… here,” Javier continues, somewhat distraught. “You’re here and you’re… warm and fun and… alive. And your scent… I can’t get it out of my fucking head even if I know I should, I really should. Fucking… lavender, ruining me. And I just… I was hollow back there. I was dark and a jackass and… not as half as honorable as I thought I was, or that I’d be. I did shitty things, bad things. Colombia twisted me in ways I can’t revert. But I want to be better now, I want to be worthy, ironically because of you and for you. So looking at you feels like the most incredible thing in the world and the worst.”

You inch closer, breathless from the words that have been thrown at you, so raw and heartfelt.

“Did you ever kill a child?” you ask, and you can see the surprise on Javier’s face as the question is being processed by him.

“No.”

“A woman?”

“No.”

You nod once, slowly, inching even closer to him. “I thought we’re friends,” you whisper.

“We are, which is why I’m saying this with respect and care. Being your friend is killing me.”

“You said I’m not your type.”

“Apparently I was wrong. So very wrong. Apparently… you’re the very thing that I want. Pathetically desperate and… so fucking needy.”

Your skin is on fire by now, your throat dry and your mouth practically drooling.

“Javi,” you manage to get out.

“No, don’t—don’t do this to me right now.”

“Don’t do what? What are you—“

“Don’t say ‘Javi’, not like that.”

“How should I say it then?”

Javier’s eyes drop to your lips, and all of a sudden he’s unable to look elsewhere, consumed entirely by the unholiest thoughts he’s ever known.

“I got some ideas,” he whispers, his tongue wetting his lips.

“Mind sharing them with me?”

“I can’t.”

“But I want you to do this to me. There, verbal consent.”

Javier cocks his head to the side, thus exposing his neck and you’re feeling more parched than ever.

“The things I could do to you…” he mutters as if strictly to himself. “The things I could show you…”

“So show them to me. Show me… you.”

“Fuck, I want—“

“What do you want, Javi?”

The way you said his name, fully aware of the effect it has on him now and how much it messes with his mind, it makes Javier unable to think straight and certainly unable to resist you. In what can only be described as an act of insanity, Javier’s hand boldly rests on your waist, barely touching, and yet enough for both of you to feel the heat radiating from it.

“I want to do this right,” he says. “You’re not a random hookup. I—I wanna take you out to dinner, get to know you and be with you.”

“Dinner sounds nice.”

“Tomorrow night at seven?”

“Okay.”

In an even more insane act, you decide to move closer to him so that your lips press against his stubbled cheek. The touch is tentative, meant to be appreciative and thankful, but in the end, it only acts as a detonator to an already short enough fuse.

Before your brain properly understands what’s happening, you feel Javier sliding down your body until he kneels before you and wraps his arms around your legs and look up at you.

“Show me how to be good,” Javier mutters, and it shocks you to your core. “Show me how to be good, for you. Please.”

You open your mouth, and yet nothing comes out. Your mind must’ve short-circuited because no words come to mind except Sylvie’s from many weeks ago. 

Mark my words, this Javier is gonna be on his knees before you, asking you to teach him how to be good.

Then you’re gonna be in big trouble, missy.

Damn you, Sylvie.

Still tongue-tied, you place your index finger beneath Javier’s chin, thus signaling him to stand back up. He follows obediently, staring at you once more and waiting, his heart in his throat.

Finally, at long fucking last, with chills creeping up your spine, you cup Javier’s cheeks and press your lips against his.

And good lord, is this the softest kiss you’ve ever had in your entire life.

It’s languid, tentative at first, as if you’re both waiting for each other’s reaction to it, but within the following seconds, the kiss turns sloppy and heated, betraying your eagerness.

Javier’s hands wrap around your body expertly, and he hums into your mouth, the sound going straight into your cunt almost soaking you on the spot. This is the part of relationships he’s actually really good at, something he’s very confident in, so he wastes no time in guiding you to his bedroom, leaving a wet trail of kisses down on your neck as he plops you on the bed, him atop of you.

“If you want to stop, you gotta tell me now,” he warns, his voice as dark as his eyes. “I mean, we can stop at any point, but if you don’t—“

“I want this, Javier. I want you. I don’t want to stop.”

Javier groans, his mouth back on yours and seemingly devouring it whilst his hands roam nervously on your body. There’s dampness between your legs, and you have the urge to rub your legs together in an attempt to hide the slickness, but when you feel a calloused hand grabbing the back of your thigh, gently squeezing it, you part your legs as if to make enough room for him. And he does; Javier grinds between your legs, beginning to undress you with so much determination it’s causing your head to spin.

By the time you’re topless and writhing beneath him, you’re begging for him to touch you some more. You’re begging for his hands, his mouth, any part of him that he’s willing to give to you, and Javier obeys without a single objection in mind.

“Lift your hips for me,” he instructs, and you do as he says.

Your pants come off, then Javier’s eyes stop on your underwear, already eating you up with a single look.

“So fuckin’ pretty,” you hear him say, and you shiver.

It’s you who pulls him back in for a kiss, and it feels like the most maddening, enticing and damnable thing in the whole wide world. One of Javier’s hands reaches in between your legs, feeling the dampness soaking your panties, and you gasp. He massages your clit through the fabric, having you moan uncontrollably right in his mouth, more so when you’re completely bare, panties thrown carelessly to the side.

“On my face,” Javier manages to get out during the brief pause which he takes to undress himself.

“What?”

“Sit on my face. Right now. I wanna taste you.”

Your mouth ajar, you stare at him struggling to compose yourself but there is no possible scenario in which you can accomplish that successfully. Instead, your eye roam over his shirtless figure, the sight fueling your needs further.

“Will you let me taste you?”

“I—it’s just I’ve never—done that, really.”

Javier looks dumbfounded at you. “You never sat on a guy’s face?”

“No, some of them barely went down on me, so I—“

“Do you trust me?”

You nod.

“Then take a seat.”

Javier lies down on the bed, quickly disposing of his own pants in the process, and it’s only then that you notice how hard he is. It can’t be comfortable, and yet here he is, choosing to do something that’s aimed for your pleasure. Unless of course this gives him great pleasure as well, which you think it does, and that only makes things tougher.

You climb up his body, quivering when you feel his calloused hands kneading the flesh of your ass and thighs as you do so, and quickly try to figure out the logistics of the act. That is, until Javier loses patience and grabs your thighs, placing them on either sides of his face, and you nearly lose your goddamn mind at his first taste he takes of you.

You’re sitting all the way on his face, his nose nudging your clit and his tongue lapping at your folds, collecting every ounce of arousal he can get. It’s pleasure from an angle you didn’t even dream of, and Javier certainly knows his way around a woman’s body. You react out of impulse and grab a handful of his hair, tugging on it while Javier’s tongue splits you open.

“Oh—f-fuck—“

You’re stuttering, heart pounding in your ears and your whole body afire; so much so that you shake, and not out of pleasure—not yet. But the way Javier yaps at your pussy, you somehow know he’s gonna get you there soon.

Beneath you, Javier listens closely to all the sounds you let out for him; he takes the time to feel every portion of your skin, not just the way his mouth is buried in your pussy, and to say he’s in awe would be a crass understatement. When you start grinding on his mouth, your body’s natural reaction to the way ecstasy builds in your body, Javier can’t help his own body’s reaction to it. You don’t see his hand sneaking behind you to curl around his weeping cock, and even if you did, all you’d want would be to take him in your mouth instead, give him at least half the pleasure and happiness he’d been giving you all this time.

“Javi—“

“Mhmmm—sounds so fucking good when you say it like that.”

“J-Javi, please—“

“Shit I could drink from you—all day long.”

Too impatient, both of Javier’s hands go back to your ass, grabbing it so that you rock faster against his tongue, but you’re already moving out of your own accord in a desperate attempt to capture more of his mouth, to have that feeling that’s only bubbling in your belly explode into a thousand explosive flames.

“Need you to say it,” you hear him beg from between your legs. “Can you say it for me, hm? Ask me.”

“Please, Javi…”

“Say it.”

“Javi, I need—I need you. Need to… feel you.”

Then, it all seizes around you: your mind goes blank, your vision goes dark, nothing but stars all around you and unbearable heat bursting from beneath you and going up till your whole body is enveloped in it. Javier’s hands continue to explore your body, touching and caressing every inch of skin, his eyes never leaving your figure like he’s admiring the most precious work of art there is.

“So beautiful,” you see him murmur as you’re getting off him.

Javier licks his lips teasingly just as you lean down to kiss him again. You doubt you’d ever get enough of his mouth now that you’ve finally tasted it.

“You’re so beautiful,” he says. “And so tasty.”

You smile flustered, still unable to think of anything proper to say. Some words do come to mind, of course; thank you, I appreciate your friendship, I’m in love with you—

Oh no, not that one.

You begin to fear that the way you’re kissing him exposes the reality in your mind, the word you undeniably feel fluttering inside your chest, begging to be released, but you can’t. It’s far too soon and too hasty, so you keep them to yourself. As your bodies get entangled with one another and you find yourself beneath him once again, you abandon those words in a tiny box at the back of your mind, sealed.

 You find that once you keep your mouth shut, you can only gaze at Javier, and he at you. There’s nothing else to be said, not when your body’s being molded in such tender ways by Javier’s hands and mouth, praised for simply being here in between the sheets with him.

“Javi?”

“Hm?”

“Can you please fuck me now? I think we’ve both waited enough.”

“Couldn’t agree more.”

Javier reaches over, opening the nightstand and eventually rolling a condom onto his erection, lining up to your entrance. You can’t help but admire Javier, his eyes, his lips, his cheeks, his strong arms, his chest and his belly, the soft, dark curls at the base of his cock, the way his lower lip quivers when he’s overwhelmed.

“You’re so—“you gasp.

And the way he fills you to the brim in one languid, careful thrust is equal parts mesmerizing and enticing.

“So what?” Javier asks.

“So pretty.”

Javier stills for a moment, blinking in confusion. “No one’s said that to me before. I don’t… am I?”

You smile, nodding enthusiastically. “Yes. Very much so.”

Then Javier sinks into you, inch by delicious inch. You feel him pressing down onto you, completely undone and ravished, and keeps muttering into your ear little praises here and there. Your back arched, you take him and his words deep inside you, allowing Javier to consume you as much as he told you that you consume him.

And you have to admit, it is the most maddening sensation in the world.

He starts to move, a new urge overcoming him than when he’d been with women in the past. Being with you feels different because for the first time in so many years, he doesn’t want to rush; in spite of his neediness and almost two years of celibacy, now that he’s here, with you and inside of you, he wants to remain in this moment for as long as possible. He doesn’t have to rush, he realizes. There’s no bombs going off in the distance or shootings—most importantly, Colombia is not out there.

But you are here, soft and warm and kind and beautiful and Javier can barely breathe thinking about how much he adores you.

He wants to say the words, he feels them on the tip of his tongue, but he doesn’t want to scare you away. And he doesn’t want to rush things when this has the potential to be something so great.

His thrusts keep the same pace, though Javier feels like he could easily come at any given moment. Your tight, warm walls around him make him dizzy, utterly lost in that damned lavender scent and in your eyes and your smile. And your lips—oh God, he could kiss you all day and all night long. All the other times he’d abstained from kissing you, how close he was… how could he not have you that way?

“Javi…”

It’s all he hears, his name moaned from your perfect lips. All he knows now is you, the way you arch your back with each thrust of his, the way you gasp when his hand lays on your stomach and his thumb plays with your clit.

“I’ve thought about this, you and me… before,” you smile, cupping his cheeks.

“Yeah?”

“Mhm. I swore I’d never tell you. But now—“

“I thought about it too.”

“You—you did?”

Javier nods, leaning down to peck your lips, the gesture followed by an ecstatic smile.

“I shouldn’t have. I knew it was… it was wrong, it was dirty and cheap… I couldn’t stop. I—I tried, please believe me, I really tried, I—“

“Javi, shhh. I know you did. You were very honorable, and a great friend. Especially now, to me.”

You both smile against each other’s lips, Javier’s hips stuttering after a little while. He feels that familiar burn in his stomach, and that’s the only time he dares speed up, almost manically so. With a few grunts, Javier buries his head in the crook of your neck, cursing once in a while as his orgasm bubbled in his whole body. He needs to feel you pulse around him more than anything.

“I’m—shitshitshit—“

“It’s okay, come for me, Javi.”

“But I—“

“I’m close too.”

“Yeah?”

“S-So close… please…”

You don’t need to beg: you and Javier are right there, both tipping over the edge of sanity and falling right into the pit of passion and ecstasy. Javier grunts the loudest he ever had, spilling himself inside the condom and remaining still above you, the pleasure coursing through his veins overwhelming him completely. He looks down on you and sees your face scrunched up in the most adorable and alluring way and it dawns on him: it’s because of him. You came twice now, once in his mouth and once around his cock, gasping and moaning sweetly because of him. There’s a pride in his chest, pride and flattery, almost to an animalistic, primal degree.

When he pulls out, you feel empty and lonely, though the thought seems ridiculous because he’s right there still, isn’t he? You can’t help it—it’s like you want your bodies to remain united as one for as long as humanly possible.

“Oh, by the way,” Javier says, returning from the bathroom with a towel that he begins to press on your inner thighs and between them, “this is probably obvious, but we’re not telling your brother about this, right?”

You raise your eyebrows, bemused at his genuine question.

“I know we joked about it before, but… still.”

“Unless hell freezes over, no, we are not telling Steven shit.”

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tags: @pedrostories @psychedelic-ink @milkymoon2483 @ifall4dilfs @casa-boiardi @fallenkitten @jenispunk

[pedrito-friskito]

strawberry wine - joel miller x fem!reader

during - part six

series masterlist | main masterlist | read on ao3

just when you think it couldn’t get any worse.

a/n: fair warning - this part is violent/dark as hell. we’re in the full blown apocalypse now, trying to survive. not much Joel in this part; we’re building reader’s survival story.

word count: 3.3k

warnings: MY BLOG IS 18+, MINORS DNI, angst, canon-typical violence and injuries, death, explosions, blood, some general badassery.

✨follow @friskito-library for updates on new works/chapters✨

Everything seems to blur together, after.

You patch yourself up, cover your shoulder in antiseptic and gauze, ignoring the way your mind whirls as you clean it. Would that…turn you? Make you like…whatever Dean had become? Were you sick already? How long would it—

You slap yourself. Hard. Hard enough that your teeth rattle a little, and you’re sure there’s a welt rising on your cheek. You’re in shock. The adrenaline has kicked in, but you need to let it take over. You need to listen to what Joel said. Take what you can and run.

Get the hell out of Boston.

Dean liked to camp, by some stroke of luck. There’s a backpack in the hall closet, a hunting knife tucked inside, along with a length of rope, a flashlight, a bunch of other camping supplies you’d never think to buy. You fill the bag with food, the first aid kit, some clothing.

After cleaning the blood from your arm as best you can, you wrap yourself in Joel’s flannel. You pull the polaroid out of the box you’ve kept in all this time, stuff it in the chest pocket. You put on whatever shoes have the best soles, grab the bat, and leave, without looking back.

Your car is not an option. As soon as you step out of your apartment, the power goes out, plunging the hall into darkness. Which means you won’t be able to get out of the underground lot. You pull the flashlight out, head for the stairwell, keep the bat hefted over your shoulder. Your hands shake on the grip, but you ignore it.

The city has been plunged into chaos. The lobby of your building is a disaster, shattered glass and debris scattered across the floor. The security guard lies in a heap beside his post, his throat torn out, blood pooled beneath his body. You bite back the urge to scream, the urge to vomit, the urge to turn tail and go straight back to your apartment and stay there until something else—

Planes zip past over head. Not regular planes; fighter jets. The army. You pick your way across the lobby, stowing your flashlight, and as you step through the remains of the door, an armoured truck speeds down the road in front of you, the sound of gunfire echoing up the street. 

Everywhere you look, there are people; some screaming, some shouting, some dead on the ground. Horror zips down your spine when you see more like Dean, sprinting down the road, lunging and jumping at people, pinning them to the ground, teeth tearing into flesh, blood pouring onto the sidewalks. Everywhere, people screaming, people dying, soldiers with guns.

Your breath seizes in your chest, turning your head left and right. Where do you go? Your heartbeat is in your ears, your blood thumping beneath your skin.

Glass crunches beneath your foot as you step onto the sidewalk, keeping your back pressed to the building as people sprint past. What do you do? Soldiers are stopping people, barking orders into walkies, and you watch in horror as right in front of you, a woman no older than you is thrown to the ground. “Please, no!” she shouts, grabbing at the soldier’s legs. “I cut myself on glass, I swear! Please!”

The soldier puts a bullet in her head, and your heart sinks into your toes. Your shoulder buzzes, the pain dulled slightly but a sudden reminder, a thick thump beneath your skin. Oh, god. Her blood seeps across the asphalt, inching towards the toes of your shoes, and before the soldier can turn to you, you bolt.

Every corner you turn is the same: bodies, bullets, fire. They’re mowing people down, more armoured trucks rolling down the city blocks. You just keep going, ignoring the glass and brick and blood that crunches beneath your feet as you do. You point yourself West, and you just keep walking.

Gunfire makes your spine prickle, and a bullet rings off the end of the bat, not two inches from your thigh. You bite back your shriek, sliding down the next alleyway you see. More people barrel down the sidewalk, more bullets rain, and you clap your hand over your mouth to stifle your cries.

What the fuck are you gonna do?

Your shoulders shake against the bricks as you slide down to the ground, a dumpster blocking you from view of the street. You squeeze your eyes shut, cover your ears with your hands, try to drown out the screaming and the sound of bullets hitting bodies, hitting people.

Hitting those…things.

Your ribs shake with every breath you try to take. You’re hyperventilating, your limbs shaking harder with every passing second. What are you gonna do? Where are you gonna go? You can’t—

You don’t wait, you don’t stop, Joel’s voice nearly shouts in your head. You just keep going.

Slowly, you open your eyes. The bat sits on the pavement beside you. The metal is dented where the bullet pinged off, and there’s a splatter of dried blood on one side. From Dean, you realize. Overhead, helicopters whir through the city, fighter jets soaring higher. You can hear the screech of tires, cars colliding with each other, more screams, more glass shattering.

You dig in the backpack for the hunting knife, strap the holder to your belt as best you can. You curl your fingers around the handle of the baseball bat and get to your feet, creeping up slowly, peering over the top of the dumpster.

If you had waited just one more minute.

The man spots you as soon as your head lifts, and something akin to recognition sweeps through his dead features. His jaw looks unhinged, blood dripping from his hands, those same strange marks you’d seen on Dean webbing across his face. A high-pitched wail echoes through the alley, and when he lunges, whatever instincts have awakened within you take over, and you swing. You hit his shoulder on the first one, the same you had with Dean, but the second connects, harder than the first, a sickening crunch as it meets his skull. He topples over, and you don’t hesitate, lifting the bat above your head before bringing it down hard, the ring of metal sounding almost wet.

You wipe the blood on the man’s jacket. There’s a knife sticking out of his back pocket, and you grab it, shove it in the side pocket of your backpack. You tighten your grip on the bat, heading deeper into the alley, eyes darting through the dark, ready.

You just keep going.

+

It’s days, of hiding. The sun never seems to come up, the sky filled with smoke and ash that burns thickly in the back of your throat. The people never stop screaming, and it’s gotten to the point where you don’t remember the last time you slept. You’ve tried not to waste the food or the water in your bag, and hunger gnaws at your stomach, the adrenaline still flowing having taken over every part of your body. You’re still shaking, but it’s not quite as bad.

You just keep going. 

Every step you take brings the sound of crunching glass, and your shoes don’t last as long as you’d hoped. The rubber splits after a few days of sprinting down alleys, hiding in empty storefronts, sitting in the dark. You sleep in short spurts, a rare moment of silence, the bat held in your lap with an iron grip. You stay out of sight as much as possible, steering yourself towards the city limits. Helicopters whir overhead near constantly, searchlights sweeping the pavement. Part of you wonders what they’re looking for.

You hear more people get attacked. The screaming never stops, but your brain seems to tune it out. You stumble into a UPS store and find a roll of duct tape, a few pairs of scissors, one of those ugly brown jackets. You wrap your shoes with the tape; it’s not ideal, but it’ll work for now. It has to.

It’s a waiting game, you learn quickly. Wait for the quiet, but not too quiet. Wait for an opening, where those things are distracted enough that you won’t draw attention. Keep the bat level, don’t let it hit anything. Don’t make a sound. Get where you’re going quickly and stay fucking quiet.

You’re thankful, for the fact that this…whatever the fuck this is that’s happened to the world has kicked your survival instincts into high-gear. It feels like you blink, and it’s been a week, seven whole days since you killed your boyfriend with a damn baseball bat. Seven whole days since Joel called, wished you happy birthday, told you to get out of Boston.

I’ll find you, baby.

Most nights, you cry yourself to sleep. Silently, no sobs wracking your throat, just hot tears that come away black when you wipe your cheek with the back of your hand. Your mind is a blur; your family, Joel, their faces, their fates. Dean. The guilt, the fear; you were protecting yourself, but it doesn’t make it hurt any less. You bury your face in the collar of Joel’s flannel, stare at the polaroid in your pocket until your vision blurs. You blockade yourself in cafe bathrooms, boutique change rooms, storage closets, whatever you can find. Whatever feels safe, not that anything truly does.

The army doesn’t let up, not that you expect them to. Not an hour goes by without the sound of gunfire, shouted orders, the crunch of debris under truck tires. You’ve been listening, as you move, eavesdropping on soldiers’ conversations. There’s talk of a wall, a gate around the city, to keep it contained, a quarantine zone. You hear whispers about guard towers, murmurs about the shopping mall becoming a shelter for uninfected people.

“Yeah,” one soldier comments, holding the biggest gun you’ve ever seen, “if any of them survive what’s coming.”

How fucking comforting.

You hear a few more talking about it, distances and weights that mean nothing to you, but when you hear blast radius, it starts to make sense. The dread sinks deep into your gut, your bag suddenly too heavy for your shoulders, the world slipping out from beneath your feet.

You have to get out.

Joel’s voice echoes in your ear. You tighten your grip on the bat. 

You just keep going.

There’s no warning, when they start the bombings. You’ve been on edge ever since you put two and two together, tiptoeing through the city, still keeping to the shadows. 

Your shoulder still throbs occasionally; you’ve changed the bandages a few times since the first, tried to keep it as clean as possible, but every time you feel it ache, all you can think of is that woman outside your apartment, pleading for her life, the echo of the bullet ringing through her skull. If they caught you, if they saw you were injured, that would be it, you know that. So you keep going, no matter what you hear, what you see.

And then, in the blink of an eye, the world is ending all over again.

The noise yanks you out of sleep, the bookstore you’d been sleeping in shaking as another explosion echoes through the city. The shelves start to shake, the few books that haven’t already been pulled from the shelves toppling to the floor. Outside, the sky is dark, and the air turns to flame before your eyes, building across the city starting to topple, fire crawling up the broken frames, bursting more windows, sending showers of glass shards to the ground below.

And the people…screaming.

The infected, howling.

Your heart is beating so hard you can feel it in your throat, scrambling to your feet as you rush towards the door. Before you can pull it open, another bomb drops, the door blasts inward, and you’re thrown off your feet, colliding hard with one of the shelves, falling to the floor beneath it. Your head hits the ground hard, pain radiating through your skull, and almost like an echo, you hear more of the shelves fall.

The last thing you see is one falling in front of the door, miraculously not torn from it’s hinge, pushing it shut, blocking out the world outside.

+

You dream about Joel.

Well, maybe a memory, more than a dream. The line seems to blur between.

Those two weeks, in the summer, the Fourth of July, every night spent wrapped in Joel’s arms, in his bed. You talked for hours, filling each other in on what you’d missed, what had happened since you left Austin. You only left his bed when you had to, when the sun had come up again and you knew Tommy would be back with Sarah, knew Joel had to go to work, knew you had to find a way to fill your day until he came home again.

He wouldn’t let you leave the circle of his arms, keeping your body pressed to his, a knee slotted between your own, bicep flexed beneath your head. His other hand roamed, starting at the base of your neck, trailing down your spine, all the way to the small of your back, the curve of your ass, before trailing back up again. You kissed him like you had on the day you left, until you weren’t sure where you ended and he began, until he was breathing your air, drinking it from your lungs.

The memory is fuzzy, faded around the edges, but it’s still him. It feels like it goes on for hours, the slow trek of his hands across your body, his mouth along every curve of your face, his body pressed into you so deeply you know you’ll never be the same.

It wasn’t, even when you left. Dean was great, he really was. He loved you, made you happy, made you laugh. You loved him, too. But he wasn’t Joel. No one ever would be. No one ever could.

“I love you,” you hear your own voice say, an echo in your head. Dream Joel smiles, pulls you close.

His mouth doesn’t move, but you hear his voice all the same.

I’ll find you, baby.

It feels less and less like a promise, more and more like a dream.

The dream fades, darkness taking over, and your head throbs. You slide slowly back into consciousness, your limbs screaming in protest, your throat thick with the sour taste of soot and ash and flame. The waking world is just as terrible as you’d left it, and you blink away the dust that’s settled along your lashes, cough so hard your chest sings with pain. You move slowly, not getting to your feet, just propping yourself against the bookshelf you’d been thrown into, resting your aching head against the wood. You’d collided with the shelves and brought them all down, but the main housing of the shelf is still intact, and you fit yourself inside it, grabbing the bat from where it had fallen and pulling it into your lap.

Fuck.

It’s dark outside, the sky inky and black, but still threaded with smoke, flutters of ash, flickers of fire. You wait, anxiety a tight ball in your stomach, for another bomb to fall, another explosion to rip through the city. As you wait, you take stock. Your arms are a mess of cuts and bruises, blood streaking your skin, a few pieces of splintered wood poking out from the sleeves of your flannel. You clean yourself up best you can, loathe to use more of your first aid supplies, but there’s a nasty cut on your forearm, and you know you can’t leave it unattended.

Slowly, you get to your feet, testing the weight on your legs, careful that your knees won’t give out beneath you. You leave your bag near the shelf, heft the bat over your shoulder, and head for the window.

The bookstore only has two small windows, either side of the door. The glass is long broken, leaving behind only the criss-crossed wires that once held it in place. The shelf that had fallen in front of the door creaks beneath your weight as you step up onto it to peer through the opening. 

You barely recognize the city. Everywhere you look, there’s just darkness. Piles of ash and charred remains, fractured cars and toppled streetlights. Twisted heaps of metal, cracked chunks of asphalt, some spots still smouldering, still burning. There are holes in the earth, pits in the ground where the bombs had hit.

And still, the screaming.

Not screaming, you realize after a moment, clutching the bat tighter. The howling. The inhuman shrieking of those…things.

The Infected.

Not knowing what else to do, you wait it out. You sift through some of the books, hoping for an atlas or map, something that could help you plot a path out of the city. If they haven’t put the gates up yet, like you hear the soldiers talking about. It’s hard to know how long you’ve been out for; minutes, hours, days.

You eat something, some kind of protein granola bar that sits like lead in your stomach, and sip your water sparingly. Your throat feels raw, no doubt from the amount of ash you’d inhaled laying there on the ground, but you know you can’t waste the water. The flannel’s been mostly shredded, the fabric torn all over your arms, a large tear across your chest, and you shrug out of it, blinking back the tears that form when you realize it’s unsalvageable. You stuff it into the bag all the same, and pull out the other, about to slip it around your shoulders, but opt for a hoodie you’d grabbed instead.

The polaroid is still intact, a little torn at one corner but the picture is still clear. Worry gnaws at your gut, and you slide it into one of the inner pockets of the bag, where it’ll hopefully be safe. You pull out the roll of duct tape, rewrap your shoes, toss back a few ibuprofen you find in the first aid kit.

You wait for the next morning, when more of the smoke has cleared, the sky not as dark, the screams quieted. Most of the fires have burned themselves out, leaving nothing but charred embers that crunch under your feet as you slip out of the bookstore. You don’t bother pulling the door shut behind you.

For a moment, everything is just…still.

You got lucky; there was a map book still on the shelves, all the pages still intact. It took a while, waiting for decent light, using a pencil you’d pilfered from behind the register, but you had a route, a plan. You had no idea how long it would take you. A car would definitely help, but the state of the streets of Boston didn’t exactly give you hope the roads outside the city would be any better.

Joel’s voice lingered in your mind: it’s everywhere. How many more of those things would you encounter on the road to Austin? Had they bombed other cities? Was this actually everywhere, worldwide? Did you really have a snowball’s chance in hell?

You tighten your grip on the bat, turn down the alley beside the bookstore. It didn’t matter. You have to get out of Boston, and you have to get to Joel. It’s that simple.

Right?

You get to the edge of the city, and every ounce of hope you had left disappears. Your heart hammers in your chest, the bat shaking in your grip, the pain in your shoulder thumping loudly with every step, even as you slow to a storm.

There’s a ten-foot fence around the perimeter of the city. Metal chain link stretching out as far as you can see in every direction, soldiers everywhere you look, tanks and trucks and gigantic guns manned atop guard towers. You can just barely make out the sign pinned to the metal: TEMPORARY BOUNDARY.

It doesn’t matter, you tell yourself; you have to get out of Boston.

PREV | NEXT

[eeunoia]

ENHYPEN Mini Series

E N H Y P E N as Greek Myths

HIPPOMENES & ATLANTA

pairings: park jay x reader

synopsis: you challenged park jongseong into a deal you didn’t expect to lose to.

word count: 9k

important note: i originally planned to write enhypen as greek gods but then i didn’t find some love stories that i like so i end up using some love stories that aren’t greek gods. also these are like modern versions of greek mythology love stories.

warnings: grammar errors, harassement , kissing and mention of virginity, slight suggestive scenes. let me know if i missed some!

note📎: i hope you guys liked it! it really means a lot to me whenever you let me know what you think about them, re-blogs and comments are well appreciated. btw, i love you guys and thank you for supporting me up until now. have a nice day/night! 🤍

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© 2022 eeunoia — all rights reserved.

“This is the third time this week, y/n.” you rolled your eyes as your gaze lifted from staring at your fingers up to Lee Heeseung, the president of the student council at your school.

He was eyeing you with his serious strict eyes but that didn’t even intimidated you. After having a staring contest for a while, you flashed the gentlemen your sweetest smile. “Sorry about it. I promise not to do it again.” you’re sure that came out a little sarcastic but you don’t care. All you think of is to get out from here as soon as possible. It’s boring here.

He sighed and put one of his hand inside his pocket before he leaned over the teacher’s table. “You already said that the last time.”

You ignored what he said and just stared at your fingernails again, thinking that you should get it fixed right away since you’re sick of the colors already. He lets out a tired sigh after realizing you aren’t listening to him anymore. You are at the detention again for breaking the school’s rule. You’re so pissed to Doyoem, your current boyfriend, because he’s the main reason why you’re caught.

You sighed, irritated and gazed at Heeseung once again. You were about to say something but both of your heads turned over to the door because it bursts open. Your lips slowly turned into a pout as you watch another senior entering the detention room.

It was none other than Park Jongseong. He’s known as Jay in your school and also the vice president of your school. His cold, serious eyes glanced at you for a second and teared it away like nothing. He walked closer to Heeseung handing him a folder. A lot of students in your school simp for these two. Not only they have simp-worthy visuals but also they’re smart, responsible and comes from good family. Oh, you’ve heard girls go crazy about them.

You scoffed lightly and crossed your arms at how he just ignored you like that. You won’t lie, your pride got hurt a little because that’s very unusual scene for you. Boys usually flirt and gets interested at your right away. But Jay...

“Okay, I’ll follow you after this. Tell Hana to start preparing the list so we can start already once I arrive.” Heeseung said and signed something at the folder before handing it back to Jay.

He nodded silently and his eyes darted at your direction again. To your surprise, his stares last a bit longer and the next thing you saw was his unamused smirk flashing over his handsome face, staring down at you. A little caught off-guard, you still managed to raise a brow at him.

“(l/n) again huh?” he said taunting you.

Your brows furrowed at him and was ready to say something but Heeseung interrupted it with his heavy sigh, his attention now darted at you too.

“Caught making out at the end aisle of the library.” Heeseung said like Jay needs to know about the rule you just broke.

Jay’s unamused smirk remained as he stared you with that piercing smirk of him. You blinked and slightly cleared your throat as an unwanted feeling slowly crept unto you. You’re a lower year than them but you’re known for being a trouble maker and your free spirited personality. You’ve been breaking boys hearts all over your campus too, so your name really do ring a bell to him.

“Why not suspend her from cheering squad?” he suddenly suggested that made you stand up and furrowed your brows. Even if you’re a little confused as to how he knew you’re part of it, you shoved that thought away.

“No! You can’t do that!” you complained right away. Heeseung’s hand went inside his pocket while he stares at your seriously.

“We can. You’ve been breaking too many rules.” Heeseung stated and your glaring eyes darted at Jay who seemed unbothered because he just smirked at you. He shrugged his shoulders and turned his back to start walking outside.

You clenched your jaw in annoyance and even followed him with your eyes. You stared at the closed door for a while before Heeseung snapped you back to reality. He lets out a sigh and asked you to take a sit. Unwillingly, you obliged, afraid that if you kept on pissing him off your punishment will get worst.

“You’re suspended from practice for 3 weeks.” he said that made you laugh sarcastically. “3 weeks?! My team needs me.”

Heeseung’s face seemed unbothered about it. “Doesn’t seem like my problem.” he said and even smirked at you. With clenching fist, you clicked the side of your cheeks using your tongue before you shake your head from side to side.

“You’re dismissed. I hope you’ll learn your lesson with this.” he said and even started fixing those papers over the table in front of him, not sparing you any glance.

You stood up your sit, completely pissed about the punishment he gave you. Jay’s handsome face suddenly went inside your mind, and you can’t help but to be more pissed off. He’s the main reason why that happened! If only he shuts his mouth of, you won’t be dealing with this trouble. How would you tell your cheer captain that you got suspended because you were caught making out at the end aisle of the library? That would be embarrassing and surely piss your cheer captain.

Your friends were waiting for you just right in front of the detention room. They gave you a teasing smile and even scolded you a little for getting caught. You got irritated just by thinking of it and even put the blame on your boyfriend. Soon, the bell rang indicating that the lunch break was over and it’s time to go back to your designated class. You three walked together over to your class.

The three of you were busy chatting together about random stuff that you even failed to notice Jay that was leaning over the wall, while reading his book. You girls instantly caught his attention since you’re a little loud. When he saw your smiling face, he can’t stop himself from admiring your pretty face. His expression remained the same despite these unfamiliar feelings occupying his chest.

When he saw you stopped from your tracks, getting interrupted by two guys he doesn’t give a fuck who, Jay’s brows furrowed for a while. He saw how you smoothly get into a quick conversation with them. He shook his head from side to side as he watches you flirt with those two guys, flashing them your beautiful smile.

After the short conversation, you continued walking following your friends since they said they’ll go first since you’re still talking with the guys.

“I don’t understand why boys even fall in love with you.” Jay’s words came out uncontrollably as you and your friends walk towards the class. He had caught your attention, not just because of his eye-catching visuals but also because of his comment.

You stopped in front of him and tilted your head over to the side. He was leaning over to the wall, one hand inside his pocket while the other one was holding a book. you crossed your arms, “I don’t see who you are to talk, Jay. I bet I can have you all wrapped my fingers in an instant.”

Jay can see your overflowing confidence oozing while you say those words. You are charmful, he must admit. But he’s no easy man. A beautiful face won’t shut him down.

Since that day, an unofficial war started between the two of you. Eyes silently challenging one another the moment you met gazes. You hated how Jay’s unaffected by your presence. It was very unusual.

“Who’s that?” your fingers pointed at a girl and your friend followed it to see who you’re referring to.

“Oh, Hana?” she answered and glanced at your direction. “She’s a year ahead of us, the secretary of the student council. I can’t believe you don't know her, y/n.” and she even chuckles after that.

You rolled your eyes as your other friend, Stacy, chuckles beside you too, joining the conversation. “You know if it’s not a man, she won’t be interested.” she stated with a teasing smile plastered over her face. Your mouth gapped at her comment, but she just laughs it off. She knew you won't take that seriously, and she’s somewhat correct.

“Rude!” you hissed at her and showed an offended face in a playful way. She just hugged you and tickled you a bit to once again place a smile over your face.

“Why’d you ask anyway? Did she do something to you?” your friend, Thalia asked. She was the one who answered that the girl you’re pointing was named Hana.

It’s your p.e and for that quarter, the girls were asked to learn basics about volleyball while its basketball for boys. Your turn was a while ago and so you’re just chilling out at the benches while waiting to be dismissed. You saw Hana walking inside the gymnasium, straight towards your p.e teacher.

You shrugged your shoulders off, “No. I just noticed her around Jay.”

Your friends nodded their heads and Stacy eventually watches over the boys at the court, fighting to get the ball like as if their lives depended on it. Thalia, on the other hand stares at you for a while more.

“What's with you and Jay?” she suddenly asked, and you choked on your water when she blurted that out. Stacy panicked and even fetch some tissues for you.

“Are you okay?” she asked.

You nodded, “Why would you ask such a question, Thalia?” you looked at your friend with furrowed brows and she just chuckled.

“I’m sorry. I was just really curious, you know? I noticed this tension between the two of you whenever you’re around each other.” she explained and now Stacy’s hooked with your topic too.

You sighed after rolling your eyes and started wiping some part of your uniform because you spilled some water on it.

“What? Y/n have sexual tension with our Senior?!” Stacy and you couldn't help but to glare at her way. Thalia laughed at what she said like as if that’s the funniest thing she heard that day.

“I didn’t say sexual tension! But yeah somehow, it’s like that...”

Stacy pursed her lips downward before looking at you with teasing eyes. You stared at her with squinted eyes, already near on telling her to stop it.

“I thought you don’t date good boys?” she asked and you glanced away to busy yourself at something else.

“Come on, you’re talking like as if Jay is a nerd type of guy. He’s actually really hot!” Thalia said and her eyes almost formed in heart shapes as she simp for the said guy.

You huffed a sigh and find it odd that you heard her simp for him. You've heard your friends simp for a lot of guys and so far you’ve got no problem with it. But when you heard her say those words, it’s a little irritating for you. Maybe because you knew the guys he’s simp for is not really into you. Someone challenging to have.

“But he’s way out of your league, Y/n.” Stacy stated. Your eyes glanced at her right away at her sudden comment. She raised both of her hands when you looked at her, “No offense. You are really pretty, Y/n but just not aligned at his type of girls.”

You pouted, “Why? What’s his type?”

Stacy pursed her lips and looked up like as if she’s thinking of the perfect way to describe Jay’s ideal type. “Her.” she said and even pointed somewhere. You followed it right away and the one you saw was her, Hana. The Secretary of Student Council. “I think he’s not into troublemakers.” and Stacy even smirked at you.

You frowned and rolled your eyes at her, “Whatever, I don’t want him as my boyfriend too. He’s too strict.” and you stood up then started walking down from the benches.

When the class was soon dismissed, you received a text message from your current boyfriend that he wants to meet you at the back building after classes. You rolled your eyes and thought that you will end it with him today. The relationship is not fun and started to bore you already so you think there’s no point of keeping it. You replied to him to wait for a while and just told your friends that you will meet them again tomorrow.

You went to your locker and put something on it for a while before deciding to go where you’re boyfriend asked you to meet. The school are starting to get isolated as everyone was dismissed from their classes already. You didn't feel scared or what while you head at the back building. This isn’t the first time you will be here anyway. For students who loves to do stuff that will violate the school’s rules, this is the a popular place to go to.

“Doyeom.” you called him out when you saw him leaning over the wall while huffing a smoke.

You frowned at the scene and didn’t bother to walk closer to him. Doyeom is good-looking, part of the basketball team of your university and also came from a good family. He’s not that good with academics and often get into troubles but he’s a good boyfriend... somehow.

“What took you so long?” he asked and pushed himself off from the wall to wait for you to approach him.

“Come closer.” he told you with furrowed brows.

“I don’t want to. You’re smoking.” you said and showed him an unpleasant expression. He sighed and took one last puff from his cigarette before throwing it over the ground. After stepping on it, he steps closer to you.

“I missed you. Sorry if you got into trouble because of me.” he said and grabbed you by your wrist to pull you close to his body.

You grunted and refused to give in that obviously pissed him off. He pulled away and stared at you with furrowed eyes. “What’s wrong with you? I already said sorry.”

You rolled your eyes. “I didn’t come here to act lovey dovey with you, Doyeom. I came here to tell you we’re over.”

He didn’t like the thing you just told him because you felt him tightening his hold over your wrist. You’re not the type of girl who will just let him do anything he wants to you so you didn’t hesitate to tell him off.

“Let me go you jerk! You’re hurting me!”  you squirmed and tried even hard to fre yourself from his hold but it was useless.

You yelped when he pulled you hardly causing for you to be dragged slightly. You smell the scent of alcohol and cigarette over him as you stand closer and so you assumed he’s a little drunk too. Now, you’re regretting that you came here. And to think that nobody else are here now because you’re sure most of the students are dismissed now and the guards are probably make their rounds here at night.

“You’re really think high of yourself huh? Thinking you can just drop me whenever you want to.” he seemed really pissed. Maybe you had stepped over his ego because you heard before that Doyeom usually the one who dump his girls whenever he gets tired of them.

You flashed him a sarcastic smile, “Well I just did. Now, fuck off.” you spat and tried to take his hold off from your wrist.

He clenched his jaw, “You are such a bitch, do you know that? Leading me on and then left me hanging? Who the fuck do you think you are?”

Your mouth gapped at the words he just told you. This is so far the worst break up you had. Yes, they often gets mad and offended whenever you end it but not this way. They usually calls you bitch then leave you but him... He’s starting to get into your nerves because of the things he’s telling you.

“Fuck you! Can’t you accept that someone really dumped you?”

Your eyes grew big when you saw him raised his hand, attempting to hit you. “You slut!” he angrily said and you just closed your eyes starting to feel scared.

Your eyes bursts open when you felt Doyeom was pulled off from you. The next thing you know, a broad shoulders were now in front of you, covering you from Doyeom. He’s at the ground after being pulled off and punched hard. You can see a blood at the corner of his lips and his eyes were glaring at the person in front of you.

Wait.. Who..?

“Mind your own business, Jay.”

Your eyes grew out of surprise when you heard Doyeom said that. You heard his sarcastic chuckle before he stretched his arm at his back towards you to make sure you’re okay behind him. His hand held your trembling one and you’re speechless at how warmth they feel, very comforting.

“You’ll be in serious trouble, Kim.” Jay’s tone were firm and serious. From your place, you can see his jaw clenching like he’s so mad about something.

Doyeom seemed to be alarmed at what Jay said because he couldn’t come to say a word. You jolted a little when Jay turned to face you after letting go of your hand. His brows were furrowed as he stared down at you, “You okay?” he asked in an unfamiliar tone.

You gulped as you blinked twice, trying to snap yourself back. Maybe you’re still in shock of what happened and Jay understand why you can't answer properly. He clenched his jaw and sighed. After he scanned you from your head to toe, checking if you’re fine, you saw he gulped and stared away before taking off his coat. You’re confused but soon enlightened when he made you wear them.

“Here, cover yourself.” he said and you can see that his ears were red as he looked away.

You looked down and saw that some of your buttons came off when Doyeom pulled you close. You pursed your lips at the thought that he got shy from seeing your bra. When you finished fixing yourself, Jay sighed and started pulling you towards somewhere. You aren’t sure why but you just let him. He just saved you so the last thing you should feel is to get scared around him.

“You know you don’t have to save me, right? I can take care of him myself.” you started blabbering while he’s still pulling you towards the parking lot.

Jay scoffed after he heard you, he can’t believe that instead of thanking him, you are still very confident to tell him that you got everything under your control. When clearly, you don’t. He just saw your boyfriend almost hit you and here you are saying these things. He cannot believe you, truly.

When you both arrived in front of his car, you just stood there looking at him. It was like as if you’re waiting for what he’s going to tell you next. He sighed, slowly losing his patience with you.

“Just get inside, Y/n. I’ll drive you home.” he deadpans. You pursed your lips, stopping a smile to spread across your face.

You couldn’t believe it. You’ll get to ride inside Park Jongseong’s car. He sighed and opened the car’s door for you. You smirked and winked at him before you finally went inside. Jay sighed out of frustration, doubting if he did the right thing to drive you home today.

“So how many girls did you drove home, Mr. Vice President?” was the first thing you asked him. You saw from his expression that he didn’t expect you to be this straight-forward. Jay do take you as someone who’s bold enough to ask such questions but to actually be intrigued was a different story.

He asked you to wear your seatbelt, dismissing the question you just asked. You looked at him with squinted eyes while you do as he say. “You just avoided my question.” you stated with suspicion lurking over your tone.

He glanced at you before he started the engine of his expensive car. “Why’d you ask?” he asked you.

You pouted, expecting that he will answer the question but instead you got a question from him. You shrugged your shoulders off after heaving a sigh and watch how he smoothly maneuvered.

“I’m just curious.” he just nodded his head at your answer and didn’t say anything afterwards.

“Address?” he asked after he managed to get out from the parking lot of your school.

“Can we go drive thru, first? I’m a little hungry.” you reasoned out but the truth is you wanted to stay with him for a bit more. It’s not always you’ll get a chance to sit inside his million dollar car and have small chitchats with the Park Jongseong.

He didn’t complain about it and didn’t took suspicion as well. He just nodded and asked you which fast-food you want to go to. The atmosphere is not that heavy, in fact you’re very much comfortable around him. You started talking about random things and Jay didn’t even complained about it. He just listens and nodded his head whenever you looked at his way, checking if he’s listening.

“Here,” you said when you offered to pay for the food you ordered since you want to treat him. He did save you and now driving you home.

He glanced at your way and furrowed his brows, “What’s that?” he asked while looking at your card. You pursed your lips, “I’ll pay for our food.”

He didn’t accept it and when you arrived at the window where you’ll pay for it, Jay just handed his card over. You pouted and slowly put your card inside your wallet. When he grabbed the food, he silently thanked the crew and gently handed it to you so you can start eating.

“You should’ve let me pay.” you said as you unwrap your burger. He glanced at you before slowly stopping since it’s red light. He shrugged his shoulders off like it’s nothing.

“I never let a girl pay.” he seriously said and you can’t help but to feel something. Suddenly the thought of girls saying that he’s the standard flashed back over your mind.

“Eat your food, y/n. I’ll drive slowly.” he said that snapped you back to reality. You smiled and nodded at him before started munching on your food.

“I forgot to thank you for saving me today and for the food.” you said while he drives and you enjoy eating.

He nodded as he rest his elbow over the window and started playing over his lips, only one hand at the steering wheel. Your stares remain at him, admiring how good he looks right now.

“You have to stop dating immature boys, Y/n.” he spats that made you look at his face. He seemed serious and have his eyes fixed at the road.

You pouted, “Doyeom is not really bad. Maybe he just didn’t expected that I will end our relationship today.” and you took a sip from your drink.

He scoffed, “So he started like that? Pathetic.”

“Why are you even there?” you suddenly asked. You saw how you caught him off-guard with your question. He cleared his throat and avoided your gaze.

“I heard him talking with his friends that he will meet you at the back building. I know what students do there so...” he couldn’t finish his own sentence.

You smirked and played the straw between your lips, “You’re worried we’ll do the nasty there, huh?” you said like it was nothing.

His brows furrowed hardly and now took a glance at you. When he saw your teasing smirk, he doesn’t know what exactly to feel. Do you really take that lightly?

You chuckled, finding him really cute.

“Don’t worry. I haven’t went beyond first base with any of my boyfriends.” you said with a teasing smile.

He glanced at you, “Liar.”

You laughed because the suspicion over his tone was just really funny. Well, yes. Maybe people won’t easily believe that because you’ve known for being a playgirl and people usually assumes things. But you are pretty serious when you said that.

“I’m not lying.” you said.

As he turns to go inside your village, he glanced at your way to check if you’re saying the truth. When he realized that you are, he smirked and you don’t know if it was just you but his face seemed to brighten after the revelation.

“I didn’t know miss heart breaker is a virgin.” the playful smirk that plays through his handsome face suddenly irritated you. You clenched your jaw and raised your hand ready to hit his face but he was quick enough to stop you.

He chuckles, “Woah, calm down baby.” you instantly blushed after hearing his sweet tone. He stopped right in front of your house but you didn’t leave his car just yet.

You pursed your lips and stared at him. He did the same thing, didn’t really know if he should let you go already or nah. You suddenly broke into a smirk after thinking of a bright idea.

“If I made you fall in love with me after three months, you have to grant me a wish.” you end up offering. A challenging smirk over his pretty lips appeared. You knew it was a bad idea to get involve with him in any way but your pride couldn’t take any damage and so you end up saying that to him. You’ve known him for someone who’s not easily tempted at this kind of things and so you’re surprised when he said, “Deal. and if you fail, it’s me you’ll be granting a wish.”

You raised your chin, trying to let him see his effect on you. He chuckled when he saw you outstretched your arm at his way, “We need to seal the deal, quick!”

He snickered a laugh, “Fine, damn. You are cute.” he mumbled and did as he told.

You smiled widely at him, “So you’re my boyfriend now! See you tomorrow.” you said and to his surprise, you leaned in to give him a kiss at his cheeks.

“Drive safely!” and you waved at him before going inside with bright smiles at your pretty face.

“WHAT?” you looked at your friends when they suddenly asked you that really surprised.

“Jeez you don’t have to shout, you know?” and you even rolled your eyes before pulling out your mirror to check yourself.

“Wait, you’re not being delusional, right? Did I heard that right? You’re dating Jay from the upper year?”

You nodded your head and fixed your hair slightly before putting your mirror back to your purse. They both glanced at each other with shock expressions. You find them really funny and you can’t really blame them if they’re this surprise. They just told you yesterday that he’s way out of your league and then the next day, you’ll tell them that you’re dating him?

“So? I’ll be off to have breaktime with him. See you later.” you bid goodbye to them and they waved at you absentmindedly.

You started walking towards their classroom to go see Jay. You saw some of his friends in front and so you didn’t hesitate to approach them.

“Hi!” you greeted. Their eyes darted at your way and even stopped goofing around to attend to you.

“Yeah?” Jake Sim, the one nearest to you asked, flashing his handsome smile at you.

“Where’s Jay?” you straightly asked.

“He’s probably at the Student Council’s office.” he answered. You nodded your head and thanked them before excusing yourself.

They all followed your figure while you’re walking away from them. They’re all a little confused as to why you’re looking for Jay.

“Did I just really saw (l/n) (y/n) asked where Jay is?” Sunghoon asked still surprised and now with a smirk spreading over his face.

Jake chuckled, “Do you think they’re dating?”

“Ey, impossible! Jay hyung like behave girls and y/n’s complete opposite.” Ni-ki commented.

Jungwon who’s just sitting beside him smirked, “We don’t know. Sometimes, we can’t really predict Jay hyung.”

And they all just nodded their head and decided to dismiss the topic about you. On the other hand, you arrived right in front of the office and you knocked with no hesitation.

The one who opened the room was Hana. Her smile faded when she saw you, “What do you need?” she asked.

“Is Jay inside?” you asked back, don’t really have time to deal with her and she’s not the reason why you came here anyway.

“Why you looking for him?” now, she sounded like a jealous girlfriend. She have her eyebrow raised at you and honestly, it’s not something pleasing to your eyes. You know girls like her and you’re sure that she likes Jay.

You flashed her your sweetest smile, “Because he’s my boyfriend.”

The shock over her face was priceless. You wanted to laugh but you stopped yourself. Even before she can say anything else, the man you were looking for appeared at your sight. His brows furrowed and looking so handsome as always.

“Y/n?” he seemed surprise to see you here.

You waved at him, “Hi baby! I figured you wanted to spent your breaktime with me so I came here.”

Jay doesn’t know what he should feel about this but he sure is pleased to see here in front of their office. “Get inside.” he said and even opened the door wider for you.

He walked back to his sit first so you took that opportunity to look at Hana with a teasing smile. When you saw how pissed she looked, you felt satisfied.

“You don’t go to cafeteria at breaks?” and your eyes soon scanned the files scattered all over the table. It was too many that it almost covered the whole of it.

Jay pulled the chair beside him and made you sit down removing his coat placed over it. You blushed a little at his gentlemen gesture but it seemed like a natural thing for him. He went back on focusing on his work.

“I have no time today. We're busy since a lot of events are nearing.” he answered you. You can still feel Hana’s eyes watching your every move but you didn’t spare her a glance. You don’t care about her at all.

You pouted and can see that he’s tired even if the day just started. You sighed and stood up, Jay furrowed his brows hardly then looked at you a bit confused.

“Where you going?”

“I will get you something to eat. Do you want anything?” you asked with a soft tone.

“No. Just stay here.”

“I insist! I want to take care of you.” you said that caught him off-guard because this is actually the first time he heard that phrase besides from his Mom.

Jay is the type of person who’s very kind, helpful and caring to the people around him. Main reason why he decided to join the Student Council was because he wanted to help the students. It was often that he’s the one who cares for the people around him. It’s rare to have someone to actually say that to him. It was heart warming.

“Baby?” you waved your hand in front of his face when you noticed that he’s spacing out a little.

Jay cleared his throat, “A-Anything.” he answered and you flashed your smile at him.

You asked Hana as well since you’re not that evil to exclude her completely. She didn’t even looked at you and just shook her head. You rolled your eyes and then leave the room for a while to go buy some food for Jay and you.

When you went back inside the office, they’re still busy and now Heeseung’s inside as well. He seemed surprised to see you there but didn’t asked more questions. You offered him some food but he refused saying he already ate something.

Jay made you sit down and asked you to stay quiet as they work which you obeyed. You just used your phone while they do their task. Jay is glancing at you from time to time, to check if you’re okay. You just flash him with your smile. He smirks and pinch your cheeks before resuming on doing his tasks.

When the bell rang, you stood up with a pouting lips. You’re not even doing anything with Jay but for some reason, you’re enjoying his company and now that you have to leave for class just upsets you.

Jay chuckled before standing up and wearing his coat. “Hyung, I’ll just walk her to her class. I’ll be back after.” he said and Heeseung just nodded before waving at you.

You two walked back to your class, you pouted when he’s steps ahead of you. “Don’t you want to hold my hand?” you asked. He scoffed a little but you saw how he blushed a bit before he gently grab your hand to hold it.

Your smile was big as you both walk over the hallways hand in hand, eyes of the students following and watching both of you. Jay seemed to not mind and so did you. This isn’t new for you anymore so you don’t really mind having them looking and watching Jay and you. You can’t really blame them to stare, you know? Specially if you have Park Jongseong holding your hand.

“See you later, baby.” he muttered softly when you arrived in front of your class. You nodded slowly pouting a little. Jay found you adorable but he knew he couldn’t delay you to your class so he leaned and just place a soft kiss at your forehead before asking you to go inside.

You know you just suggested this dating and making Jay fall in love with you just so you can save your ego but you didn’t expect to enjoy it this much. Jay is so much more than just the smart, rich and perfect Park Jongseong all of them knows. He have his own flaws that actually made him perfect for your eyes.

The whole two weeks of you and Jay dating went smoothly. Just him being caring and gentlemen towards you. Honestly, you’re surprised at how patience he is to you. Even if you’re being a brat, he will just sigh heavily and tried dealing with you in the nicest way. It was rare for you to be treated that way. Usually they just don’t talk to you whenever you’re being a brat. People don’t know how to deal with you.

But even if you have many privileges as Park Jongseong’s girl, you also have disadvantages such as him being more strict than you than before.

You stormed your way with a frowning face. “I can’t believe you let Heeseung suspend me!” you yelled at him while he was fixing some of his things inside his locker.

He glanced at you and sighed before he continues. He knew you’ll be upset about him not even trying to lift up your suspension even if he can freely do that and ask his friend for a favor. But no, he wouldn’t let you get your way. Even if you’re his girlfriend, he wouldn’t let you get spoiled rotten. He can spoil you in a different way but not like this. Not when you can put yourself in danger.

“Why? Didn’t you cut class and sneaked out from the school?” he asked you, tone cold and strict. You gulped because you’re slightly not used to that tone of him anymore.

You pouted, “I did but—”

“Then I think you deserve your punishment, Y/n.” he stated and shut his locker closed. You glared at him and pouts even more.

‘Y/n? Did he really just call me using my name? What happened to baby? To love?’ you thought to yourself, clearly sulking. Jay just stared at your face, fighting the strong urge to pull you into a hug and comfort you.

“I hate you! You should have defended me! You’re my boyfriend and—” you were cut off when someone approaches the two of you. Your head turned over to that person and you rolled your eyes when you saw Hana.

She’s also one of your problems. You understand that they’re close friends even before you enter the picture but she should know her boundaries! You are dating him, she shouldn’t glare at you whenever you two are being affectionate. She doesn’t have to come in between your moments, try to ruin your dates and anything more. You don’t know if Jay’s just acting dumb or he’s really just too dense to even notice how Hana’s head over heels for him.

“Jay, I finished the list you asked me to do.” she said didn’t even acknowledged your presence. Her attention was all focused on your boyfriend who turned his attention towards her too.

Even before he can say something you decided to butt in because you’re pissed at Jay for not defending on you and pissed at Hana for interrupting.

“Can’t you see I’m still talking to my boyfriend?” you asked too arrogantly at her. She acts a bit offended, obviously for a show and to ask for sympathy from Jay. It was effective you must say since you saw how Jay’s expression changed after what you said.

He strictly eyed you, giving you a warning look. ‘Wow!’ you thought to yourself.

“You don’t need to be rude, Y/n. Go to my car and wait for me.” he said and even put his car keys over one of your hands.

Your eyes didn’t even look at the keys he handed you but it stayed darted at him with cold stares. You clenched your jaw before slowly shaking your head from side to side. You clicked the side of your cheeks before you dropped his keys over to the floor.

“No. I’m going home by myself. Have fucking fun talking to her!” you said cursing loudly then turned your heels to start walking away.

You can hear Jay calling for you but you ignored him completely and just walked your way out of the school. Jay cursed lowly before he picked up his keys and was ready to go after you but was stopped when Hana grabbed his arm. He glanced at her with a furrowing brows.

“Let's talk tomorrow, Hana.” he said right away, dismissing her thinking she was worried about the thing about the upcoming event.

Hana clenched her jaw and refused to let Jay go. “Why do you have to keep up with that kid, Jay? She’s no good for you.”

Jay stared at her seriously before he gently take her hold off from his arm. “You know I like her for a long time already, right?”

Hana’s eyes watered. Yes, of course she knows. One of the reason he rejected her long ago was because he liked you. She thought it was fine since he seemed to not do any move to you and you’re pretty busy with your boy toys. But now... she’s starting to really think she have no chance at all. And it was all because of you.

Jay then walked away from her to follow you. He didn’t even turned his head to glance back at Hana, all he can think of is was you.

He arrived in front of your house but you refused to see him. He knew how stubborn you are whenever you’re upset so he just let you be and handed your helper the food he got you as his peace offering. He asked her to just give it to you which she agreed on so he thanked her before leaving.

The next day, you tried avoiding Jay the whole day. He was trying so hard and really doing his best so you kind of feels guilty about it. You realized he didn’t really have to defend you from Heeseung because you’re really wrong from sneaking out and its not his fault if Hana kept on getting between you.

So now, after being dismissed a bit earlier, you decided to go meet him at the Student Council’s office to talk to him since you are really wrong and because you started missing him. You’re already used to his presence and so to not be able spend time with him made you sad.

But you didn’t actually know what you should feel at the scene you saw the moment you opened the Student Council Office' door.

Jay hugging Hana... and they’re all alone here too. You scoffed making both of them jolt and turned to face you. Jay pulled off from the hug right away ready to explain but you acted faster than him. You stormed towards them and slapped Hana hard.

“You bitch!” you shouted at her very angry.

You’ve been keeping it all to yourself but to actually see her doing this made you explode. You just couldn’t keep it anymore. Jay pulled you away from her right away, “Y/n!” he said sternly and looked at you like as if you are the one at fault.

Your chest tightened at the sight of him in front of you like as if shielding the now crying Hana. You scoffed and chuckled sarcastically because you just couldn’t believe it. You clicked the side of your cheeks using your tongue before tilting your head over to the side.

“Wow! Just fucking wow!” you shouted and started backing away. Jay attempted to grab your wrist to stop you but you were quick to dodge it off.

“I fucking hate both of you! I hate you!” you shouted at him and you saw pain crossed his eyes but you don’t care. All you can think of is how upset you are right now.

You turned your back against them and started storming out, walking away from them. Jay sighs out and was about to follow you because again, he made you upset.

“Why does it have to be her? Can’t you just like me? I’ve been here all the time.” she said lowering her head because she’s starting to cry already.

Jay clenched his jaw. “I’m sorry, Hana. It will always be her.” and with that he left and she just cried even harder.

Jay saw you walking out of the building so he ran so fast so he can catch up on you. He held your wrist to prevent you from walking away but you started wriggling, freeing yourself from his hold.

“Let me go! I hate you!” you said like a brat and started pulling your arm away from him.

He figured you will end up hurting yourself so he came up with an alternative way to get you to come with him. He suddenly carried you like a sack and you yelped at his sudden move. You’re now hanging over his shoulder as he tries hard to cover your skirt. You screamed and started hitting his back.

“Don’t move so much, baby!” he said and started walking towards the parking lot. Some students around started looking at your way because you two are obviously making a scene.

You kept shouting but Jay didn’t let you down until he arrived in front of his car. You were about to run away but his hold over your waist were firm. You pouted and frowned before shooting glares at him. He didn’t mind and opened his car.

“Get inside.” he said in his softest tone.

“I don’t fucking want to.” you said still very mad.

Jay clenched his jaw and sighed, calming himself. “Please, love? Let’s talk inside.” he begged. You clenched your jaw trying hard to not give in easily but Jay’s soft affectionate eyes are really hard to refuse too.

You rolled your eyes to hide that you’re slowly giving in before you went inside his car. He gently closed the door after that before he walked around to enter the car. You kept silent until he comes inside and stared at you.

“Baby,” he started and was about to reach over you but you moved away.

“Don’t fucking touch me.”

He sighed, “That’s it.” he said in a serious tone so you got confused.

The next thing you know, he lifted you by holding your waist and then placed over his lap. You blushed but choose to glare at him still. “I told you to fucking let me go! I hate you! I hate Hana! I fucking hate you both!”

Jay clenched his jaw. He knows how much of a brat you are but you never gave him this attitude. He sighed rested his hand over your waist to keep you in place.

“What’s with the attitude, love?” he asked softly. Despite the curses and glares you give, he chose to approach you in a gentle way which is you didn’t expected.

Your eyes stared at him, still glaring. He stared back, trying to break your wall and to let himself in your system. One of his hand lets go of your waist and went over to cup your face. He started caressing it slowly.

“Why are you cursing me that way, hmm?” he asked and slowly you calmed down.

You pursed lips slowly turned into a pout as tears slowly appeared over your eyes. Your balled fist that were on your sides slowly loosened before you covered your eyes as you end up crying.

You hated how Jay’s starting to make you feel things and how he gets into your system but you hate seeing him with Hana even more. You hate it. You despise it because whether you admit it or not, you want him all to yourself. You’re starting to feel pissed at yourself too because this is not you. You don’t do jealousy because you know how hurtful and how awful it feels now, Jay’s making you experience it.

Jay's heart cracked at the sight of you crying. His hand left from cupping your cheek and holding your waist, he snaked his arms over your waist towards the small of your back to pull you into a warm hug.

“Stop crying, baby. I’m sorry if I made you upset.” he said softly that made you want to cry more.

He tried shushing you and calming you before he pulled away so he can see your face. He smiled a little, “What made you upset? Tell me so I can do something about it.”

You pouted adorably before your hand started fidgeting over his uniform. You glanced away, feeling shy.

“I’m j-jealous of Hana.” you finally admitted it.

Jay’s heart thumped faster at the sudden confession. He smirked but he bit his lower lip so it wouldn’t spread wider. He slowly pulled your face closer to shower them soft sweet kisses as he mumbled sweet comforting words together with it that slowly calmed you down.

“Please don’t hug other girls like that. I want your hugs only for me.” you said in a sulking tone as you cuddled yourself more over his chest.

You heard him chuckling before placed a kiss at your head, “Damn, you’re so adorable baby.”

After that day, Jay made sure he is distanced from Hana because he doesn’t want another incident of misunderstanding with you. No matter how adorable he finds you jealous, he doesn’t want to upset and make you cry again. No, not his baby.

You went back to normal. Spending time with each other, you bring him snacks during break time since he have no time to stop by at the cafeteria to buy some. You eating lunch with him, you two walking around the campus hand in hand, and going home with him. You also spend weekends with him pretty often as well. You may hate to admit it but there’s a lot of things changed in you when you started dating him. You became a better version of yourself.

“Y/n! Do you want to come?” your head snaps towards your friend when she suddenly asked you one afternoon.

You gave her a confused look, “Huh, where?”

“Cut class!” Thalia answered and even made a gesture of cutting something using her fingers.

You smiled at her apologetically, “I’m sorry but Jay will get mad!”

You’re expecting them to be upset or something but instead the two of them looked at you with a teasing smile. “Ooh, tamed!” she teased you and you just can’t help but to laugh at it.

You must admit, dating Jay for almost two months now do really tamed you down. You’re not that very obedient and still break some rules but they must admit that you’re a lot more better now. And honestly you like this version of yourself even more.

“Baby!” you shouted to catch your boyfriend’s attention. He did and smiled widely as he watch you run your way towards him.

He opened his arm ready to welcome you with an embrace. “Hi, love.”

“I didn’t cut class today!” you proudly said and he can’t help but to chuckle.

“Proud of you love.”

You pouted, “Where's my kisses?”

He chuckled and leaned in to give you multiple pecks that made you happy. Of course, fights can’t be avoided. It will always be part of relationships.

You watch how he hardly clenched his jaw while opened his condo unit’s door for you. He picked you up from your practice and as planned, you guys went to his place and hang out. You often do this already so it’s not new for you anymore.

You pouted as you slowly went inside. He's been ignoring you ever since he fetched you from your practice.

“Are you mad?” you asked as you follow him towards his kitchen.

He got himself a water and chugged over the glass like as if cooling himself. You stared and watch his every move. You’re bothered that he’s being this silent but you also can’t help to find him sexy when he’s like this.

“Jongseong,” you called him softly.

His piercing eyes darted at your direction, “Are you mad?” you asked him after catching his attention.

“I just saw you hugging that Steve guy.” he said and you can’t help but to have a smile forming over your lips.

His brows furrowed, “Are you smiling right now?”

You let out a chuckle and that made him even more upset. He shook his head from side to side before walking away from you and now heading toward his living room. You chuckled even more and decided to follow him.

“Baby, come on!” you said.

“I just find you hot when you’re jealous.” you said and he just looked at you seriously.

“I’m serious, y/n.” he stated that made you pout. You knew that he’s really upset whenever he calls you using your name and not his endearments for you.

You sighed and slowly made your way closer to him. He was watching your every move. You moved his hands that was resting at his lap before you gently placed yourself there, replacing them. You slowly snaked your arms over his nape to support your weight before you looked straight to his eyes.

“Hey, are you really jealous?” you asked even if you already know that answer to that.

“I want you all by myself, Y/n. I don’t like sharing you.” he said that made your heart beat raced.

You blushed as you stare at his eyes, enjoying how sincere he looks right now. His eyes were always been like this. Whenever he says something to you, he seemed so sincere. He’s very caring, protective, supportive and understanding towards you. It was really hard not to fall in love and catch feelings with him but you are scared. Because you know that the two of you started because of a bet, a deal.

“I am yours.” you said using your sincere voice while staring at his eyes as well trying to communicate your real feelings with him.

Jay gulped and slowly held your waist using his hands, he leaned in as you kept your stares at him. “All yours.” you added before he connect his lips with yours in a slow and passionate way.

Your heart were racing so damn fast as the kiss deepens but you also started blushing because you feel like you’re doing it wrongly. Yes, you may have a lot of past boyfriends but you never had this intense kisses before. This will also be the first time with Jay after dating him for two months already.

“Too many past boyfriends and still don’t know how to kiss?” he asked having one of his eyebrow raised at you.

You blushed and glanced away, feeling guilty and embarrassed at the same way. He chuckled before he placed a soft kiss at your cheeks then it moves over to your jaw then towards your neck. You shut your eyes at the feeling he’s making you feel right now. When you felt him sucking at your skin, you moaned that made Jay’s smirk.

“Don’t worry, baby. I got you. I’ll teach you how.” he said and resumed on kissing you over your neck, sucking on your skin. You moaned once again at the sensation and you’re sure it will leave marks.

“J-Jay.” you moaned his name unexpectedly.

“Fuck, you sound so sexy moaning my name.” he said before he slipped his hands inside your shirt.

He once again found your lips and started kissing you hungrily, “You’re mine, Y/n. All mine.”

“Congrats baby!” you shouted at him when you ran to greet him after they just won their rugby match.

Even if he’s all sweaty, he pulled you into a hug and kissed you. “Thanks for cheering for me, love.”

He told you to wait for him because you guys will go to the afterparty together. As you wait at the benches, your mind played over the thought of how the students around you compliments Jay all over the game. He did played so well and carried the whole team.

If you will think about it, Jay have all the things you can look for a lover. He’s kind, caring, handsome, smart, caring, considerate, understanding and can even cook. Now that you experienced being taken care and being Jay’s girlfriend, you now realized why they’re all falling for him. He is very worth it and still the fear inside your chest was there.

You’re starting to overthink that maybe your friends were right when they said before that he’s way out of your league. Even if Jay never made you feel that way, you’re insecurities are getting the best of you. Specially if you know the three months deal with him is almost over. Just a week left for you and him. You don’t want it to end. Sound greedy and all but you don’t want this to end anymore, you don’t want to stop being his girlfriend. Just thinking about someone else having this position makes you angry.

You just can’t let everything sink in over you. You can’t believe you just lost on the game you thought you mastered already. You challenged Jay into this but ended up being the loser.

While you drive towards the party, you’re still occupied and stayed silent the whole ride. Jay of course noticed and started to worry.

“Hey, everything alright?” he softly asked that made you glance at him.

He lifted your hand that he was holding and kissed the back of it. Just by that gesture, a tear left your eyes. You’re seriously worrying and scared right now. You don’t know what will happen once you admit to him that you lost on your deal. How will react? Does he feel the same? Because sometimes he’s making you feel like he does!

Jay panicked and quickly pulled over to the side to attend to you. He unclasped his seatbelt and cupped your face. He even helped wiping off those tears of you.

“Why are you crying?” he asked worriedly.

You sighed trying to calm yourself and mentally prepared yourself for what you’re going to do next. You figured there’s nothing that will change whether you do it now or tomorrow or the week after. You need to let this feelings out.

“What’s your wish?” you asked.

Jay looked a bit lost when you asked that. “W-What?”

You pursed your lips as you stared at him with pained expression. “I lost Jay. I f-fell in love with you.” you stated that caught him off-guard.

“What’s your wish?” you asked once again that slightly snapped him back to reality.

He sighed, “Be my girlfriend for real.”

Your eyes grew slightly while staring at him. He flashed you his sweetest smile before he pulled your face closer to him. “I love you, Y/n.”

You pursed your lips, tears streaming down your face once again. But this time, happy tears.

“I love you!” and he sealed your love with a kiss.

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greek mythology teaser

[sinningtamer]

Not sure if you’ve answered this before but what are your favourite fics and ships?

Love all your art btw! <3 Thx for all the food!

i might've years ago, so let's go again! i'm gonna answer this question as only NSFW/kink related, otherwise the list would be way too long haha

alright let's start with the obvious: ParviII is and always will be my #1 one ship, even when I dip in and out of the fandom a lot (i feel the term OTP is super outdated these days? but if there was one ship i could use it with it's them...)

so obviously i'm gonna say Talking Body and Payment and Payback by @sparxwrites. because. you know. how can i not. oh yeah, Good Vibrations is also a classic. hiii sparx, i'm sorry for picking your older fics, i just have such a bias. they've written a ton of great stuff over the years though, so go give the account a peak! there's something for everyone, especially if you like darker stuff.

...speaking of accounts with a lot of content who lurk around here, shoutout to @pawpunkao3. lmpᴇarI is one of my favorite ships, and they're still such a rarepair somehow?? anyways I think about Between Bedrock and a Hard Place at least once a week tbh. A New Religion That'll Bring You To Your Knees is fantastic, and i have a soft spot for I Spy (even tho i didn't watch too much empires). again, another author with a whole arsenal under their belt, so don't just take my word for it and check the rest of his fics!

back to lmpᴇarI being a rarepair... @thatstoomuchsoup has Chicken Soup for the Soulbounds (okay it's more pearI-centric but they're both there) and is another blog that specializes in some of my kinks and these fandoms. same with @anon-teddy's content, gotta give a shoutout to full. this is also making me realize i haven't sought out enough poly S0up Group or GᴇmpuIse/PᴇarIgem fics...maybe i'll get back to you on that...

there's a bunch of good explicit trᴇᴇbark fics, but i said i was gonna keep this list concise, so the only one i'll specifically point to is how to deal with your supernatural lust for blood (and other things) in a completely normal and god-honoring fashion. for...reasons. also because it's good!

edit: oh my GOD i realized two seconds after posting this i completely forget to mention @also-an-art. go read (this is) hungry work and honey don't feed it right fucking now. i've read both of these in full (pun intended) multiple times they're that amazing. it's rare that the plot is just as good as the horniness, when i tell you i lost my mind at some of the development in these. also hot and dirty (like the la air) is a guilty pleasure. AND it introduced me to a song that ended up being #20 on my spotify wrapped LOL (RPF warning on that one! trust me tho)

let's get to my other bias, shall we? RᴛSpiff and RᴛS00t don't....have any explicit fics. nor does poly lᴀds. CMRᴛ does, though! I'm kinda picky about how people characterize them, but play it cool and Every Stumble and Each Misfire are lovely (note that the second one is also blatant RPF! don't say i didn't warn you o7)

speaking of lᴀds, if you follow me on main, you know i got into Bᴀnᴀna Bᴜs Sqᴜᴀd just last year (I'M SORRY, OKAY, DON'T @ ME-) you'd think getting into an old fandom late would mean a ton of great smut fics, right? to be honest, i haven't found many that i care for, but maybe i'm just picky... however, i remember your lips, they're the ones i miss, and smoke in your lungs, your lips on mine are SO GODDAMN GOOD i'm not even mad it's only those two i like because i could reread them 20 times. god. such fun characterization. shame the author orphaned them because i badly wanna read more of their stuff.

this is the part where you go, spirit, do you read anything besides (mᴄ)yt fandoms??? and i go, not really.............well, sort of. i like 0verwatch! and M0icy!! Reciprocity is a delightful PWP long fic. i'm also not really an omegaverse guy, but Water Me has such a good take on it i fell in looove.

okay, i'm gonna cut myself off here, enough though i could probably name dozens of more fics if i sat and thought about it. if anyone i tagged wants to be untagged, feel free to reply here or shoot me an ask/dm!!

[redemptioninterlude]

Tag a quality blog, You’re it! Quality doesn’t means that you have a lot of followers, or a lot of messages. It means that you’re nice to other people, and you deserve to be happy. If you get this message, someone is telling you that they love you as you are, and they don’t care how many followers you have. Send this to 15 blogs who deserve it. If you break the chain, nothing will happen. But it’s just good to let someone know that you love them. 💙

random love in the inbox ( always accepting ) + @wndrbcy

omg shayyyyy my sweet sweet baby! thank you so much, i mean i feel i’m trash™ but i will take this undeserved praise because you’re a darling and i adore you and i know you’d insist. i hope you know how much i absolutely adore and love you and - i’m gonna make sure i tag these other super deserving blogs down below because tumblr is a dick and caps you at 10 asks.

@ofchaotics - oh my god elllll my sweet baby, my honey, muva made it home. but i think the memories of ATL are gonna hang with us for a while, like, we did that, we did the 12 hours and barricade and beautiful moments staring up at that beautiful man and just in general you are the realest fucking bitch of all time and i fucking love you for that. like, a true ride or die, and i’m seriously so fucking happy we met out of that absolute disaster of a group chat, and i feel that out of everything, it was definitely worth all of it for us to come together as an absolute menace duo. thanks for always indulging my absolute worst and best self at once, and keeping me humble. love you bestie!

@sunxsin - kayyyy jfc where did you come from, the last 2 months have been like??? incredible??? who are you??? like literally it was sewww funny thinking back to when i was like wait are you the ling i have from tumblr like... and you being like NAH, then not expecting everything that came to follow like ; seriously? you’re a fucking whole ass gem and i’m so so glad we connected through the gv and you’ve just been absolutely fucking brilliant and charlie is so right you NEED YOUR PASSPORT ALREADY, like wtf vancity would be a whole fucking trip and just urghhhhh i adore you, you can’t leave, thanks.

@prettydead - oh phantom. how many years now? we’ve really fucking been THROUGH IT babes, and honestly i think you know by now that i would absolutely stab a bitch for you. people are insane, but you manage to come through all of it as sensitive and lovely as you’ve always been and i think it’s such a beautiful thing for you and just - darling. you’re a peach, like, seriously for real. next time i’m in new york you ARE coming from jersey and we ARE going for a fabulous lunch and we WILL hug out what 5 years worth of knowing each other ought to hug out to. you’re beautiful. i love you. that’s all.

@killjoysanonymous - oh em gee. lmao. like honestly i’m... like you know what i’m gonna say. losing each other and finding one another again was just such - like yes. i’m glad. even with all the weird shit that went around it, i’m glad because it allowed us to open up and talk about so much more without all that heaviness hanging over everything and like. watching you grow, thrive, and become this like, amazing person ( well, you’ve always been amazing, but you know what i mean ) has been just a fucking treat. you’ve seriously conquered mountains and are living your best life, and i’m just lucky to be your friend.

@chmerical - fio! fiolicious! jk or am i, anyways, like, fio you’re such a brilliant rper and i’m literally left in awe of you like all the time. watching you play such layered, glorious, and amazing muses has been my little secret delight these last few months, and i’m like, really glad we got this chance to meet because i’ve always secretly loved reading your writing from afar with other people. i always felt shy because i never knew enough about the series before to know how to get involved but now i’m like, all in, all strapped, all ready, you know? plus lol, you’re my cunt in arms against the stupidity of the world.

@wiredsmile - abi! jfc can you believe we first met through another phantom original years ago? like i think what i love is how so much of your optimism, charm, and positivity has remained, you’re just like, this whole force of a human being and it literally is so cool. i wish i had that sometimes because i swear you’re always like, the first to shake shit off and be like KAY WHATEVER LET’S GOOOO, and you’re amazing for that seriously. also i mean i love your muses? the softest, sweetest fluffs? like?? the dynamics we make always shake my fucking heart omfg.

@feralsmile - siren! ok another new buddy but like??? what a girl, seriously, you’ve been so fun and so game and so great to plot with to try a bunch of shit and i love that our spaghetti throwing has come out with such great little dynamics through everything and that you’re so excited and wanna do more with it and i just love love love how just your creativity works. not to mention the like, 5-10 videos i get a day of you reminding me that you’re thinking of me LMFAOOOO you’re such a trip girl, i can’t wait to have you around for an age and then some.

@bubblaegum - evieeee omg ok so you already know i was out here like. i know this bitch, i know her, i KNOWWWW i know her, that then everything from there but like? i love how time has given us so much like, we got the chance to find each other at different stages and see all these great moments and just it’s so lovely being around you again and like - who could have anticipated you loving on bonnie so much LMAO it serious is amazing and like. so are you. and i mean that! i hope you really feel it on the day to day too, because i appreciate you a ton, and you are worthy of so so so much.

@sylkshe - heathyn you are just insanely creative. i have no other way to put it because it’s just like TRUE you know like, you come out swinging, you’re never one to shy away from putting complex stories together for people typically shunned, and you’re just... you know, this stunning person from end to end inside. i feel really glad we got to meet because i am adoring your take on all the muses you’ve been playing, and just ani in general like what a sweet little fluff of a girl who deserves the world, just like you! wishing your move all the best luck the planet can spit up!

@petitsdieu - mel. i don’t know where to start. you might be like wait why am i here but seriously you’re such a fucking force to write with and like. you really inspire some of my best writing whenever we throw our girls together. hara is just such a beautiful and chaotic soul and you are too along with her, and i feel really fucking thankful that after all these years we still manage to put out something so incredibly delicate and lush that my eyes just fucking water over it. you’re amazing. the end.

@xamassed - ariel i don’t know how else to put it but i’m just consistently in awe of how much you do. you’re amazing at everyone you write, your consistency is incredible, and just the amount you can do with everything in the chaos of life around you is like. superhuman. i aspire to be like you with all that seriously, like your quality and amazingness knows no bounds and i feel really lucky that you noticed me despite my mid-ass blog so like, thank you for being willing to take a chance on meeeeee!

@dangaer - jupiter you’re like. seriously one in a million. you have flawless taste and most of the time i’m like why are you even writing with a scrub like me, but i appreciate the fuck out of the fact that we do and that you’re just amazingly talented and so good at exploring really crazy topics with your muses. yeah it’s not always like sweet and nice but you give such colour to villains and i love all the things we’ve come up with and you’re just.. urgh. i love getting replies from you, period.

@finalsurvivorgrp - i hope it’s not weird i threw you on this! i’m just like, seriously wanted to reiterate just how great of a writer i think you are, how your muses are incredible, and just how i always have like, quietly loved your blog from afar. i’m glad that i picked up that random starter despite being nervous about it, because your grasp on horror is just peak amazeballs and i’m just really lucky to have the chance to write with you.

@temporalobjects - what can i say? just. in the years you’re just always dedicated, amazing, and your muses are great. i’m always so happy when we start writing again, and i’m always in lust with your fucking art. you’re just a consistently cool human being and i love whenever i see you on the dash, it’s like an instant smile and a, damn, i hope they’re doing well kind of feeling. can’t wait to do more with you as always! 

@wndrbcy - oh shay, my sweet little butterfly. of course you needed to get this back, and i wanted to make sure you were like damn am i really gonna get this, and the answer ofc is yet. it’s so funny that we’ve managed to connect over the years and carry on cool plots and seriously i fucking just love what we do and how we’re trying new things and how freaky it gets sometimes whenever you’re around because you’re just a lovely human. i know life is hard, but i hope us being friends maybe makes it a bit nicer because you definitely brighten my day. thank you for sending this, particularly on a day where i’ve felt like damn, i’m just nawt that great, and reminding me that i have a place here. love you, to the moon and back.

[elvenking42]

you should answer ALL of those asks in the post

Oh my god ok HAHA get ready for a wall of text then

1. who is/are your comfort character(s)?

If you've been following me long enough you start to see trends. I've always liked Luigi so he's probably the most popular character on this blog. Ganondorf is quickly climbing the ranks somehow.

2. lighter or matches?

Lighter for function, matches for fun :D

3. do you leave the window open at night?

I've tried it in some summer months but all it does is leave the air cold and wet when I wake up, I'm not super into it. But the nighttime breeze is lovely

4. which cryptyd being do you believe in?

I wouldn't be surprised if I came across the Nain Rouge. Although I'd be a little nervous considering he's a harbinger of bad luck

5. what color are your eyes?

A sort of greyish-blue

6. why did you do that?

I thought it was funny :3c

7. hair-ties or scrunchies?

Hair-ties by a mile. Sorry to scrunchie fans

8. how many water bottles are in your room right now?

There's like three empty water glasses on my desk right now I really should clear them out

9. which do you prefer, hot coffee or cold coffee?

Hot coffee for sure. Cold coffee blends are fine, but half the time I drink coffee at all is for the warmth

10. would you slaughter the rich?

I could probably use a hand

11. favorite extracurricular activity?

Drawing :3c I've been having a lot of fun doing some video editing in my personal time too hehe.

12. what kind of day is it?

Honestly it's been pretty awful. I couldn't sleep last night so I ended up sleeping in super late and missed the chance to call my doctor's office and schedule an appointment like I was planning. I got a letter in the mail summoning me for jury duty and had a little anxiety attack about it. And then later I tried to take out some cash at the bank and my card got declined. At this point I'm just hunkering down at my desk trying to get myself to relax

13. when was the last time you ate?

I had some chips like an hour ago.

14. do you love the smell of earth after it rains?

Of course! But my favorite part of rain is the air pressure right before a storm

15. are you a parent? (all answers qualify)

Nah, that doesn't interest me

16. can you drive?

No, ironically this was part of the anxiety attack mentioned previously

17. are you farsighted or nearsighted?

Nearsighted

18. what hair products do you use?

I use a really standard shampoo and conditioner. But I use a special wash for my beard specifically

19. imagine we’re at a sleepover, would you paint my nails?

Yeah! I'm not great at it but I'll try my best

20. do you say soda or pop?

Pop, this is Michigan!

21. something you’ve kept since childhood?

I answered this one previously :D

22. what type of person are you?

I'm trying to get better

23. how do you feel about chilly weather?

I like it! I can tell winter is around the corner and I'm very excited to bundle up. Unfortunately it's also getting dry and my skin is terrible

24. if we were together on a rooftop, what would we be doing?

I'm not too sure how we got up there, I hope you brought a blanket, it's cold out!

25. perfume/body spray or lotion?

Lotion! But perfume every once in awhile

26. a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times?

Some point in the future when I'm living on my own and I've got a stable job and a comfortable home and I can invite my friends over for parties where we all bring a dish and spend the evening playing party games and talking about the nice things in our lives and when everyone leaves for the night I can send them all home with some snacks and a hug. Manifesting it.

27. about how many hours of sleep did you get?

I got 7 hours last night, unfortunately that was between 10am and 5pm so it was godawful

28. do you wear a mask?

Yea! I still wear a mask out in public. I only remove it if I'm eating or in private company with people. It's a little frighting that I'm always in the minority though

29.how do you like your shower water?

Scalding

30. is there dishes in your room?

See number 8

31. what type of music keeps you grounded?

I always return back to oldies when I don't know where else to go. I like familiar lyrics and retro melodies

32. do you have a favorite towel?

Not really

33. the last adventure you’ve been on?

I went to a Dia de los Muertos event last night being hosted by a restaurant I frequent. It was actually super fun, they had love music and vendors selling things. I actually ran into an old coworker while I was there and got to catch up with him. I kept ordering spiked hot coffee because it was outdoors and the drinks were yummy but unfortunately 3 coffees worth of caffeine made it hard to fall asleep

34. is there a song you know every word to by heart?

This one

35. what’s your timezone?

EST

36. how many times have you changed your url?

Actually never

37. someone in your life, other than a relative, you’ve known for 10+ years?

Some of my buddies from highschool. I love them dearly 💕

38. a soap bar that smells good?

Go for a Lavender/mint blend

39. do you use lip balm?

Not as much as I should

40. did you have any snacks today?

Had some goldfish

41. how do you take your coffee?

With creamer

42. an app you frequently use besides this godforsaken site?

Twitter unfortunately.

43.what’s your take on spicy foods?

I like it! Im a little sensitive tho so I take it on the mild side

44. you get a free pass to kill anyone, who is it?

Elon musk is a dead man

45 . can you remember what happened yesterday?

See 33

46. favorite holiday film?

Scrooged is so rewatchable for me

47. what was the last message you sent?

"I know what you are..."

48. when did you first try an alcohol beverage?

I think my mom let me sip her wine when I was like 8. I didn't like it very much so I didn't try drinking until I was 20

49. can you skip rocks?

Sometimes!

50. can i tag you in random stuff?

Sure!

[knotbinary]

hello ! (pls don’t feel obligated to answer this, I know this is kinda a weird ask) im working on making a monster dating sim game (which currently I’m in the planning stage of) and am attempting to conduct some market research here on tumblr 😅. I really love ur blog and was just wondering if you’ve noticed any trends in terms of wat monsters/ monster tropes that tend to do well with your posts ? It doesn’t have to be anything detailed, just general vibes if you’ve noticed any - tho totally chill if u haven’t. Again ABSOLUTELY NO PRESSURE to respond to this, I don’t want to take up ur time (if you’ve even read this far thank you). Sorry for the strange ask ! and thank you for posting amazing content you’re literally one of my favourite blogs

I'm not sure how much help I can be because I don't tend to notice these things, but I can share with you which of my posts are most popular and perhaps you can extrapolate from there. Keep in mind, though, some of these posts did well because I reblogged them to my main (@roguemonsterfucker) and that blog has a lot more followers than this one.

A werewolf who hasn’t told their partner that they’re a werewolf yet, but they buy their partner knotted dildos to test the waters and prepare them…

being left as the sacrifice for the old gods at the edge of the forest. but you are found by the pack of werewolves instead. (cont.)

I’m a simple person. I see fangs and I get hard.

A magic monster dildo. It gains power as you use it until eventually it can take its full form. In the middle of using it, suddenly it becomes an actual monster and starts fucking you.

Oh to be tied up and used as a breeding mount for all manner of horny creatures. (cont.)

A backyard barbecue to get to know your new partner’s friends turns into a werewolf pack gang bang. (cont.)

Thinking about how after sex with a werewolf, you’re knotted for a while and you spend that time just chatting, bonding, maybe even snacking on some food you kept handy.

Can’t get the idea of being a pet to a werewolf and vampire out of my head. (cont.)

Those are all my posts on this blog with a considerable amount of notes.

I'll say, it's interesting that the living dildo one is already so high up on the list considering I only posted it ten days ago. A lot of these posts took weeks or even months to get the amount of notes they have now.

Another that I seem to recall doing well quickly was ironically the other dildo one. Though I think that's partially because I reblogged it to my main, which I don't usually do.

I used this website to find my most popular original posts: https://jetblackcode.com/TumblrNoteCounter

I hope this helps somehow! And I hope you'll let us know when you have the game available! We need more monster dating sims! 🥰

[ceebit]

it's all fun and giggles to see you falling for other groups, but let's do the other way around for once. any tips for new carats? i've been postponing for two years now, need a final push to join caratland 🥹

aw hiii ^_^ i’ve only been a carat for about five months so i haven’t even hit the half year mark—but the fact that you’ve been postponing 😭😭 and for two years no less hon what r u waiting ?? for ??? do u need convincing. i got u.

LOOK AT MY BEST FRIEND. oh my god oh my god. look at the bestie. look at him. swooning fainting falling over etc etc.

thirdly, follow a shit ton of tags. like a lot. ones like #svtsource and #svtdaily are full of so much wonderful fanmade content like gifs, moodboard, graphics, and so on. they’re so nice to look at oh my god ?? the talentry ,, and for free ???? for the free…

blogs like hourly[member] or daily[member] are also good for fanmade content as well, but they also might have updates reblogged as well. some update blogs might have more personalize users to fit the member they’re focused on, though, like my favorites @chweck-in and @fy-wonwoo ^_^

blogs like hourly[member] or daily[member] are also good for fanmade content as well, but they also might have updates reblogged as well. some update blogs might have more personalize users to fit the member they’re focused on, though, like my favorites @chweck-in and @fy-wonwoo ^_^

additionally, try and make friends !! caratland is pretty vast and i’ve made friends in all sorts of communities <3 all it takes really is commenting something nice and being friendly :)

i feel like this is more technical towards starting a content blog which i’m not even sure you want to do but i really can only draw from my own experience 😭 so i’m really sorry if this appears more content related. but the community here is super nice !! it’s super sweet and i’m glad i joined <3

[the-kipsabian]

So. What I think about you. It’ll take some telling to get there. Might get a bit sappy but here goes nothing.

So I’m a pretty new fan of wrestling, less than a year of proper watching still. It was a bit of a spontaneous thing, a friend made watching another sport would post things, and eventually I decided to take a peek and see what all the fuss was about. And in the end, I really enjoyed what I saw. I could get into that, but it’s not exactly important to where I’m going with this.

I don’t remember exactly when I first saw Kip. It was after his feud with OC, but still close to new years. And I thought, geez this guy is neat. Had no idea what was going on with any of his past work, I just liked the way he moved, I guess. So I thought, let me dig a little deeper into this. Eventually I ended up at your blog, and let me tell you, you were a hell of a resource to this baby fan. I’ve always been a bit nervous about following new people (had some bad experiences in the past I’m not eager to repeat) so I think I sort of lurked a while before I actually hit that follow, probably by accident honestly.

So then was Kip and Penny’s trip to Japan, and this is where I got introduced to Chris Brookes, who I’m not sure I even have words for how fond I am of him now. So I very much attribute that to you, and I’m pretty thankful for the introduction to an absolute bastard giraffe man who I adore.

Eventually I got a bit more settled into my new interest, started posting a bit on tumblr, reblogging gifs and the like. And then, just like how I got into wrestling, another fairly distant mutual joked about being interested in what they were seeing. So we talked a bit, I recommended some of what got me interested, and I think in the end that got me a new friend. In a way, I can wrap that back around to you, too.

I see that you struggle a lot. Sometimes it’s with writing, or art. You still make cool things, and I’m pretty awed by that. I’m looking forward to what you’ll make next. I doodled a rabbit on the back of a shopping list today, for the first time in months. It felt like a little victory. I wonder sometimes if your writing, your art, feels like that too. I’ll still celebrate it as if it is.

I’m not really sure how to end this. I guess I just want to say, we aren’t exactly friends, or at least, I don’t feel I can claim that we are right now. But I do think about you, and root for you. And in myriad little ways, you’ve changed my life. That feels a little strange to write, but it’s not untrue. I suppose no one can really know what impact we have on anyone else. At any rate, I hope you’re doing well, I saw you were sick this week.

-🐓

first of all: CHICKEN ANON YOURE BACK HELLO!! its been a while i hope youre doing well! 💜

legit when i read this first thing in the morning, i fucking cried. just.. theres a lot to unpack here, i try not to ramble but this. something like this is literally why ive been keeping on posting everything i do despite occasionally feeling like theres no point to sharing anything. ive always been telling myself that i first do it for myself, and then share it in case theres someone somewhere down the line that might be looking for this content later

and to hear that there is even one (1) person literally like this out there, using my blog and the content i put out to familiarize themselves with my blorbo, im... like oh my god 💜💜

im really glad it has helped you make friends too 💜 and while i dont know who you are, i would consider us friends no matter what tho, especially after hearing this. so glad things like this have helped you to get more into the community, thats amazing! and to touch up on the art thing, yeah its hard at times to pick things up again after a long while of not doing anything - i literally wrote a drabble last night after not writing anything for a week and i havent even seen my drawing tablet in like two months now lmao - but im so happy to hear about your grocery list rabbit!! little doodles here and there are definitely better than nothing, especially if you enjoy doing them!

youre so precious anon, i hope youre having a good day. im still slightly sick, getting better now thankfully so i should be fully operational the next few days and oooooh when that happens its all over you fuckers when i get back to writing (this is affectionate i swear LMAO)

thank you, i love you 💜

[elysianslove]

oh boy idk if you’ve ever talked about this before (i’m new to the blog, and you’re so very talented!!! you make my dumb horny heart just 🦋🦋) BUT what are your thoughts on which of the haikyuu boys are best/worst at being edged? like who’s begging and crying after 20 minutes and who’s able to hold out for hoouurrs before getting just a touch whiny. i. need to know. for science 🤲🏼

thank you so much!!! welcome to the blog my love 🥺 but omg. thoughts. so many. 

HAIKYUU BOYS THAT CAN HANDLE EDGING 

matsukawa issei; he’s purely holding out this long out of spite. as if he has something to prove, which he very much does. he’s barely bucking up into you, trying his best to hold his pants and his hisses from how borderline painful this is, but you can see how tense he is. his abs keep spasming, his biceps flexing as he fists the sheets. he keeps his legs spread for you though, lets you suck at his cock, fondle his balls, stroke at the base and squeeze at the tip with your much smaller hand. he lasts a good an hour and 10 minutes. honestly, genuinely impressive. he won’t let you get off easy though, good luck with that. 

oikawa tōru; originally, i’d think he’d be so bad at this, but honestly, oikawa’s orgasm control is so impressive? even when he’s fucking you, he’s lowkey edging himself because he always holds off until you cum. so letting you edge him isn’t too much of a problem. he definitely cries and begs like a bitch, but he lasts, oh he lasts. approximately 35 ish minutes. definitely cums without warning and without permission, and you can’t decide whether he did it on purpose to piss you off or because he genuinely couldn’t continue. it’s okay, just overstimulate him till he’s crying all over again. tōru’s a very pretty crier, after all <3

kita shinsuke; oh my god, the best boy. he’d last days if you asked him to. he’ll be quietly, as quietly as he can, panting and whining and groaning, silent tears streaming down his face every time you pull away from his cock. every time he bucks his hips up, it’s followed by a trail of “sorry, sorry, m’sorry,” that it’s just so adorable. has you cooing at him, soothingly rubbing at his thigh and murmuring that it’s okay, that he’s doing so good. he lasts around 45 minutes, but when he cums, he promises to do better next time, to last longer. anything for you <3 

sugawara kōshi; this fucking masochist. he likes it. he likes the pain. probably was the one to suggest it to you. he sits between your spread legs, back pressed to your chest with your hand stroking his dick from behind. you stroke at him until he’s so close and pull away, watching as his cock bobs desperately, and he moans for it. he’s so vocal about it, begging and pleading, but when you go to ask him if he wants to cum yet, he tells you, “no, no, i can— more, more.” he lasts 2 whole hours. it’s like, kind of scary. he does pass out after and actually scare, but he gets up a minute later with a cheeky smile like, “again?”

miya atsumu; like oikawa, he will cry and sob so fucking much, and he’ll make such a mess, but god, does he last. atsumu thrives off of praise, and having you tell him how good he’s doing for you, such a good boy, atsumu, all for me? has him drooling for it. both him, and his cock. he’ll get a little dumb halfway, almost just letting you use him, but he does whine a lot, crying and pleading for you to let him cum, but it’s all bark and no bite. it barely has anything to it. i firmly believe he’d be one of top, lasting around an hour and 30 minutes, just because atsumu gets so lost in everything, including giving up control. 

kuroo tetsurō; another one to last mainly out of spite. he wants to prove to you it’s not much, it’s not that bad, it’s easy work. you quickly make him eat his words by the third time you pull away, and it just dawns on him that he’s the one that put himself in this position in the first place. it’s no one’s fault but his own, and because he doesn’t wanna seem like a coward, backing out so quick, he lasts at least 30 minutes, and gets through it without begging, only spitting out curses and panting and groaning deeply. 

akaashi keiji; sweet boy keiji definitely lasts, all for you. he’s not too vocal either, just light curses to himself, muffled moans, broken, bitten down sobs. he genuinely does love to let you have your fun with him, because submitting to you is just so satisfying. and i can see akaashi loving edging so much because of how good the orgasm that eventually comes is. like the moment you give him permission to, he’s seeing stars, and it’s why he lasts as long as he does, why he tries to push for longer. he lasts a good 45 minutes, and he’s been trying to beat that record for a while now. don’t worry, he will. 

sakusa kiyoomi; is so fucked out, so far gone, to the point that you don’t even think he’s in control of his own body anymore. even if you told him to cum, he wouldn’t. he’s so deep in this headspace of being under your control it’s incredible. it’s mesmerizing. he looks so pretty, cock so red and wet and hard as ever, painfully so, against his pale skin, twitching and bobbing and begging for attention. he lasts 40 minutes. it’s the most gorgeous 40 minutes of both your lives. 

asahi azumane; so good! such a good boy!!! doesn’t last so long, but definitely tries his best for you. it’s some 20 or so minutes in that he cums, but he immediately starts chanting out apologies, begging for you to forgive him, to give him another chance. he continues to try until he can last so long, but it’s the fact that he’s willing to that has your heart soaring and your body heating up. 

HAIKYUU BOYS THAT CANNOT, WHATSOEVER, HANDLE EDGING

bokuto kōtarō; baby boy is crying 10 minutes in. he can’t handle it. if you tie him up, he’ll rip through them, flip you over, and fuck into you till he’s filling you up. he won’t even try. he watched a porn video where a person lasted an hour and thought, oh must be worth it, and asked you to try it on him. just. it’s just not for him. he prefers the pain of overstimulation over edging, forever. 

iwaizumi hajime; please he lasts like 2 minutes. he just hates it so much. on him, at least. he can edge you for hours, and he’d the most satisfied man on earth. but sit between his legs and tease him by sucking at his cock, only to pull away just as he’s about to cum? somebody clearly has a death wish <3 but do bring it up and ask to try it! he still won’t last lol. but make him last. watch him cry. make iwaizumi hajime cry. make him. it’s beautiful. 

kageyama tobio; mannnn kageyama can cum untouched, hands free, if you really tried. grind down against him for a minute and he’s cumming in his pants for you. he has no concept of orgasm control whatsoever, and if you tried it on him he’d just get angry at you??? like fine no sex for u tf. he lasts a good 5 minutes, so good for him or whatever. 

kozume kenma; he wants to last. he wants to. but you have him crying, sobbing, 20 minutes in, and he just unintentionally spills down your throat without warning. of course, you’d felt the twitch of his cock, but you’d wanted to see where his head was at exactly. after he came, he felt so humiliated, but he still forced eye contact with you and went, “do it again. i’ll last an hour this time.” like ok no problem for me :) 

ushijima wakatoshi; doesn’t realize he’s being edged, and when you pull away just as he’s about to cum he sits up and stares at you with a deadpan face like, “that was not very nice of you.” he just. finds it boring honestly. he doesn’t want to drag something out like that for so long. he indulges you, sure, but for like 3 minutes, before he’s like alright time to fuck you. 

hinata shōyō; hinata’s just way too overexcited. he really does put his mind to it, but i think he gets too in his head about it that he just ends up cumming right away. but it’s a ruined orgasm, cause you pull away just as he’s cumming, so it’s so not satisfying, but for some reason, hinata loved it? so yeah, lasts 0 seconds, but discovers new kink! 

HAIKYUU BOYS THAT CAN, BUT JUST DON’T WANT TO

suna rintarō; oh he most definitely can. you cannot convince me he wouldn’t be able to. as much as suna is lazy, he’s just as impatient, and he can barely handle how foreplay seems to drag on forever. he wants to be inside you, and he wants to be inside you now. it’s ridiculous. if he could though, he’d last a good hour probably. he just really doesn’t want to. 

daichi sawamura; could 100% do it if he really put his mind to it, but just. why? what’s the point of not orgasming? he just doesn’t get it </3 you can try to convince him by making him do it on you, but chances are he’s gonna realize how much he loves to do it to you only. daichi’s so possessive it’s crazy, and he gets this mischievous glint in his eye whenever he realizes how good something makes you feel, especially if it’s pain. he is a dangerous man. 

miya osamu; most definitely would be able to last hours, but again, he just doesn’t want to. it’s also not one of those situations where he prefers overstimulation either. like osamu’s plenty kinky, sure, but those two aren’t what cross his mind when you say, “let’s change things up a bit.” it’s not that he gets bored of it either. he just. doesn’t wanna do it. like he can spend time making you feel good, and vice versa, with way more different things. and he seems like a very in the moment guy, like choking you in the moment or making you squirt. yk :) 

satori tendō; oh tendō loves edging, just on you. he never really gives you a chance to ever try to with him, honestly. he just loves, loves, loves to edge you, but not because he wants to purposefully hurt you, but rather to praise you, to tell you how good you are for him, to make you feel so good when he finally lets you cum. if you were to edge him, he’d honestly probably last over two hours. like not even exaggerating, he probably would. but no, you’re more fun!