#now who do i WANT TO beat me in a fight-
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i was going to make a poll/tournament style bracket "which monster from my monster mash do you think you could beat in a fight" tournament. but i stopped almost instantly bc the thought of "living doll/cursed toy red pyro" coming in dead last, and the mental image of hoards of people ganging up and beating the snot out of poor little baby-ghosty pyro made me cry.
but also the real last place "easiest to be in a fight" contender is phantom of the opera spy. that's literally just some incel who lives in the walls. like tell me you don't already want to EXTERMINATE that fuckingg guy.
#i mean you're right- pyro WOULD be the easiest to beat in a fight but at what cost? :((((#i think the hardest to kill (not counting entities where are technically undead/ already dead ) it would be yeti heavy#.txt#monster mash au#the only AU i need bc it is perfect and i will be taking no constructive criticism abt it at this time. bless <3#now who do i WANT TO beat me in a fight-#well thats another story.
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Part of the reason that Republicans are so desperately acting like they will never lose again is because they are deeply terrified that this is their last real chance to win. The big orange dipshit came in and gutted the party of everyone who wasn't a loyalist, which left it full of nasty little gremlins who have gaping voids where charisma and human decency is supposed to go.
They still hold a lot of power, but if we stop them this year the next presidential election may not be the Most Important One Of Your Life™, that's not a guarantee or anything, but if they don't win here and now their future looks grim, this dipshit is the only guy they have left and he's extremely diminished and has his brains leaking out of his ears at this point. We can beat him into the ground.
So that's what we're gonna fucking do. We're gonna break these fucking fash. They will crash upon us and we're gonna break their fucking necks. When they come for us they will lose because they're fucking losers and we have each other's backs which is something they fundamentally are incapable of comprehending.
#We will fight them on the shores in the trenches etc etc etc#I know it's been said before but the people who said it were right to beat back fash for whatever else they weren't right about#Fuck these fucking little bastards who want to rule our fucking lives and destroy our communities#They've got too much power as is and right now is our moment to crush them and take it back#If you're not into Harris fine work to kick the GOP off your city council they're shitty little gremlins there too I guarantee it#(Hell if you're in LA there's two good chances to swap a shitty Dem for a good dem on the council)#But it's time to fucking break their necks and if we do it here the worldwide movement of these fuckers is gonna follow#Not because we're particularly special but because our fascists are pretty large exporters of the stuff#A loss for them is going to shred their party this unholy alliance is already fraying between the fundamentalists and the tech ghouls#Let's magnify that shit for them by making them eat it.#Don't mind me I'm just sick of these fucking ghouls and ready to make them suffer for what they've tried to do#All implied violence in this post is metaphorical ;)
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If nothing else Koenma is a Kuwabara stan and I'm right there with him o7 (I need to write the kuwameshi fic that goes with this fr)
#maybe one day i'll write that au i have sitting in my head#ever since the comment he made about making kuwa spirit detective instead ive been thinking about it#like...what if yusuke is still recruited same as canon but like#kuwa was already spirit detective? doing assignments for the guys upstairs and all#and they made yusuke help him after his resurrection instead of going solo#and it's hilarious because they still have the ''rivalry'' set in place so it's like#now i gotta be coworkers with this guy i was in a fist fight with last week?#yusuke is like you can't be serious you want me to fight DEMONS with the guy who cant even beat ME? lmaooo okay#kuwa would be more in tune with his powers atp in this au and super offended like hello#why would i use my reiki on a FELLOW HUMAN CHILD you DICK i can hold my own on my assignments just fine#but he's actually really excited to be able to spend time with yusuke doing something besides getting his ass handed to him#they're both genkai's students (she's endlessly annoyed but they grow on her)#i just think it'd be fun cos like#it'd be harder to exclude kazuma from shit if he's literally been involved in this shit before he even met#kurama and hiei#kuwabara isn't really told about yusuke's resurrection so things go mostly the same up til he's brought back#they're both called to koenma's office and it's the spiderman pointing meme 💀#it's koenma's first time seeing kuwa in person as he usually just sends assignments with botan#yusuke has already seen him cos of the resurrection arc#and koenma is SUCH a fanboy ''kuwabara it's such a pleasure. you know you're my best worker 🥺''#''um urameshi am i seeing things or is that a fuckin baby'' yusuke will NOT stop laughing#it fucks koenma up so bad he makes sure he's in his adult form when he's around kuwa next#cos he wants to be the respected boss but also guy that you can chill with!! he's so cringe#okay yeah i need to write this it's such a fun concept#kuwameshi#yu yu hakusho#kuwabara kazuma#yusuke urameshi#koenma
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i do think it is legitimately very funny whenever someone tries to make the claim that lavabending is inherently a very slow subbending and therefore not good in a fight. specifically when using that argument against Bolin's skill as a bender.
Sure, I feel like in very specific instances with Ghazan that could be a fair argument to make. It takes him a moment to destabilize the Ba Sing Se wall and for him to kick up enough lava to destroy the airbending temple. (to the point I would argue that if Bolin had been versed in lavabending like he was in s4 he would have swept the ground with Ghazan), but in moments where he's actually in a fight his lava is incredibly quick.
Just the lava frisbee on its own is an incredibly quick move
But making that argument with Bolin in particular is absolutely batshit when outside of lavabending he is an incredibly quick fighter. I would say it is one of, if not the, most defining things about his fighting style. He moves very, very quickly and uncharacteristically agile for a earthbender. This is a known thing. Like
I am not the first person to say this but no other earthbender does backflips like he does. And THEN with lavabending he is just as quick if not more so
Bolin since season 1 has had an uncanny knack for bending incredibly fast, and his lavabending is no exception to that rule. It's honestly something that haunts my brain all the time because how quick he is with it low-key breaks the balancing? a little?? Like earthbending was always shown to be very strong but in turn it was slower than other types of bending, but with Bolin that doesn't really seem to be a hangup he has.
#:v#bolin#legend of korra#NO ONE IS DOING IT LIKE HIM....#the way people will sit down and try to convince me with their whole chest that mako is a better bender is wild.#Like mako has a lot of other strengths but I would not say he stands out as this uniquely strong firebender#honestly except for azula most of the firebenders we see are talented for sure but none of them like Otherworldly strong when in bending#Again not saying he is weak but if you want the Strong bender of the lok group it's Bolin hands down 🤷#obvs Korra is strong but she's the avatar she's going to be strong#Bolin is just a guy he's a kid for the majority of it a child who has had zero formal training#and I would argue could beat the majority of the beifongs#with the exception of toph but even then it's not gonna be this easy toph sweep#sure toph can metal bend and is an incredibly skilled earthbender but also Bolin is also very skilled and has Hot Rocks#tho tbf I hate comparing those two can't they just both be good?#anyway Bolin solos su and the chief in a real fight I will die on that hill Specifically#s4 Bolin I mean it's the lava diff#god I sound like a powerscaler put me down now guys#anyway. Bolin 🔛🔝
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Sims 2 CC Mega Post
I say 'mega' but there really isn't a whole lot, I just didn't wanna split it up. Anyway, yeah, I mostly and normally and prefer to make Sims 4 stuff, but I made some Sims 2 stuff for me last year and this and I figured, may as well share it. Most of these require outside meshes so keep that in mind, Sims 2 CC downloading is a bloody nightmare.
Alex Skin
So I made a custom skin with tattoos for Alex as it seemed simple enough to do. Ain't gonna look perfect, but it looks fine from a distance, same resources I used for my Sims 4 versions, so I did vector the rose and skull. I based the skin off these default replacements. You don't NEED these, but they make it so that everyone matches. Yes that site requires an account and login, it's NSFW, it has body hair and works with nudity. Because obviously I play with mods like that. I made the skin look right for Fit/Thin/Fat but I didn't bother with any age but adult nor did I bother with female, because, idc. I THINK this is Alex's hair mesh, but idfk, I have so many that look like this.
It also works in Castaway Stories, as does all of these, because I used them in it too. :> That made Alex the palest guy on the island as all the skin tones in Castaway Stories were shifted to one tone darker per. I manually put my replacement skin in that too, but I didn't have the darkest, so no body hair to them.
Streaked Jack Hair
You need this mesh to make this work. I made this for myself as I didn't really like anything else I had for him, and this is Sims 2, so I went with earlier hair, and I liked how this mesh looked. Loosely based on like this hair. I didn't bother with other ages beyond adult again. I would have if I decided to de-age him and send him to university, but I did that with Otto instead.
Again also works in Castaway Stories, as I used it, again. It's easy to import Sim's faces from 2 into the stories games.
Awsten Tricolor Hair
Awsten Red Hair
You need this mesh to make this work. The bright green in that is also great and I used that for him at first. These are his eyes too, or rather his right eye. No screenshots of the red hair, but it's just a bright plain red in case you prefer it. I made this hair as it looked okay with the colors kind of being randomly spread around the mesh. This is his outfit btw. Again only works with adult as far as I'm aware.
BONER Shirt
R&R Shirt
NoRegRetsShirt
JALEXShirt
BMTHShirt1
BMTHShirt2
BMTHShirt3
BMTHShirt4
You need this mesh to make these work. All of these are Everyday fashion only by account of only the Everyday category having the option for separates and these are all tops. Don't ask me what pants I use, I have so many downloaded, but these work with all of them.
As it turns out I didn't take screenshots of all of these ingame, but maybe these help with that.
PTV Hoodie
DropDead Hoodie
You need this mesh for the PTV hoodie. I don't THINK the DD hoodie needs anything external, I compared it to a vanilla mesh and it seemed to line up. I don't know, I made it last December and I didn't log everything I did. Like the shirts above, Everyday category only as they are tops.
As a bonus, here's some misc Sims 2 screenshots to hit the image limit, including this stuff and with no context to my game. I know most people on modern computers play with The Ultimate Collection, but I installed it via discs, and a few ISOs as I didn't feel like spending $30+ for a few missing stuff packs on eBay. :) Pretty sure those ISOs are why my game is British and I have to always manually set the clock and a few other small things every time I load it. Not a big deal to me, just felt I'd mention for clarity. Castaway Stories is from an ISO too as have you SEEN those prices on eBay?! I have Sims 3 on Disc too, 100%, never made any CC for it tho. I love how Sims 2 was out at the peak of, ahem, mid to late 2000s culture so a lot of CC for it is of it's time in the best possible way. I kept this theme going with adding in custom music that ONLY existed from before 2009 (so 2008 is my cut-off date) and it's fun only hearing music of the era ingame. :) I DID make stuff for Sims 1 too years ago but I don't know how I even really did it so idk how to make more and also I don't care that much. I wanted to try playing with Alex and Jack in Sims 1 too but I kept getting fucked up files that didn't work or look right and I didn't know what I needed to do to make it right and I didn't wanna waste more time than I already did trying to make their faces. I do have semi-not ugly faces and outfits for a couple others tho.
Oh yeah, all this stuff is made in the Body Shop and GIMP for textures.
Whole SimFileShare Folder
#sims 2#sims 2 cc#ts2#ts2cc#sims 2 download#sims 2 cas#alex gaskarth#awsten knight#jack barakat#bring me the horizon#pierce the veil#Sims 2 is chaos and drama and no one attracts chaos and drama in my game like Alex and Jack do#Their house is a haven for enemies to come by and steal their newspaper knock over their trash can and pick fights#So the yard is often a biohazard of trash and inside isn't much better as both of them are slobs and Jack is lazy#Also they're engaged to each other despite both their aspirations hating commitment go figure#Jack did it I didn't they just somehow decided to accept despite getting negative memories for it lmao#Alex is a crybaby who's hard to satisfy and Jack just wants to make out and woohoo he's a lot easier#But they both have a lot of enemies who they fight a lot especially Jack as it feels like no one like pranks in this game#And I use him to attack Sims who are mean to Alex a lot too as Alex gets a lot of shit from townies for some reason#Awsten likes them as he likes to eat trash and also he's a werewolf and he just doesn't seem to care about much of anything#I had a case where Rian kept coming over and inviting himself in to make out and woohoo with Alex while beating up Jack#Now I got Jack and Rian to kinda get along but Rian is grumpy and it doesn't take much from Jack to set him off#Otto also hates Alex and likes Jack but again drama drama drama#I totally get why Sims 2 was really popular with middle aged moms in its heyday its like a soap opera#Geoff exists too as a werewolf as he wanted to be one and I just used him to turn Awsten as well#I brought Awsten and Geoff on vacation with Alex and Jack as I wanted to meet Bigfoot and have Jack flirt with him#But I needed mods to do that grrr#Also Alex got pregnant on that vacation but we don't have to talk about that it made him very difficult to work with#But he kind of already is a little bitch all the time anyway#sims castaway stories
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As much as I love playing embrace Dark Urge runs (discussion in therapy pending), there's something so narratively satisfying about how a Resist Durge playthrough can go once you get to the Bhaal Temple. Your character steps into the ring with Orin, it's intended to be a duel, but odds are you're getting eviscerated pretty quickly. You then switch to one of your other characters in your party and throw an attack, effectively breaking the duel and setting the whole temple upon you.
(Adding a cut because this ended up being longer than I thought)
But, I think it's a very satisfying way to play. Your party members have grown fond of your Durge, seeing them as a friend, a family member, even a lover. They've watched you and your pain over your Urge and what it makes you do or want to do. Maybe you've slipped up once or twice, but you've been trying so hard to be the hero they know you can be, that Faerûn needs. So, when it comes time to finally face your demons and you're getting so horribly hurt in the process, they can't help but rush to your defense. It'll put all of them in danger, but it doesn't matter because they want and need to help you, their ally and companion.
Bonus points if you select your character's romanced companion as the savior/duel interruptor to make it extra delicious. They've fallen in love with you, stayed with you when your Urge craved their blood the most, maybe by this point in the game you've helped put their demons down as well. They see you in pain, a final valiant effort to overcome your Urge against the power of Orin, a whole cult, a god of murder himself. They want to protect you, save you as you saved them.
I'm also fond of the extra beauty of Astarion being your Resist Durge romance since it puts the two of you in very similar situations. Fighting against the will of your masters, finally defeating your demons with your newfound companions' help and being offered the greatest power you could ever fathom... only to deny it, ignore power in favor of your party and your love.
This isn't even mentioning just how goddamn good the Withers resurrecting you cutscene is. This skeleton in your camp with unknown and unfathomable power (also apparently supposed to be Jergal himself if I've done my research properly?) is able to bring you back to life, free of your Urge. The line along the lines of "Bhaal could only destroy what of you that he knew, but because you've grown past your Urge and become your own person, he couldn't destroy that new growth" is just so weirdly powerful narratively. Tav may be a default character for you to create upon making a new save file, but Durge is the canon protagonist and I think that entire scene shows it the best. It's a beautiful secondary climax of the narrative (primary being battling the Netherbrain of course).
And, perhaps it's just an oversight on Larian's part or something that'd be a bit difficult to work into the cutscenes mechanically, but I think that it could only get more impactful if your companions could comfort each other during these moments. Everyone and their mother wishes you could hug Astarion after he kills Cazador, but also imagine your romanced companion cradling your body after Bhaal kills you. It seems just a little odd that they all (meaning your party) kinda just stand around staring at your corpse, especially with how close y'all have gotten.
Idk, I have a lot of thoughts about this section of the game in this particular type of playthrough and some of them are hard to articulate into words. It's just such a damn good narrative peak and can really make you feel things.
I've completed I think two resist Durge runs and just hit this point on my third and it really stuck out to me this time (then again my new antidepressants are kinda fucking with me so that might be playing a role). I left it as my last mission before dealing with the Netherbrain and I think it helped build the anticipation of that moment. Everyone else has been helped by you, and now it's your turn to come into your own. I really felt so connected to my character walking into the temple, feeling like everything has been building to this, that regardless of what happens our suffering will finally end. And you have your party there to help you in your time of greatest need as you've done for them.
There's a reason this game was Game of the Year, the narrative is just so powerful and the replay-ability is just insane. I've beaten this game ten times, heading for my eleventh and it truly just never gets old and never fails to make me feel so many things so strongly.
#we're gonna bypass how i have the withers big naturals mod installed#because it kinda undercuts the moment when withers comes in to resurrect you and he has these massive honkers#i'm a big fan of embrace durges since it's a great way for me to let loose without real world consequence#(my anticipation for patch 7 grows daily of course)#and it's also just fun to be your worst self and create the fucking legion of doom with your party#you'll never beat the sheer power of an evil durge/ascended astarion/dark justiciar shadowheart/minthara team up#I AM FULLY AWARE I AM SINNING WHEN I ASCEND ASTARION AND IT PAINS ME EVERY TIME BUT I LIKE EVIL NARRATIVES SUE ME#but a resist durge run makes me feel so many more things#helping shadowheart with her family helping astarion learn to be his best self free from cazador lifting the shadow curse among other things#plus everything I mentioned in the main post#and then the final crescendo of the score at the end of the epilogue party cutscene is a HUGE chills moment#although i will always be mad that in order to keep gale from ascending you have to make him seek forgiveness from mystra#she should be apologizing to him wtf no wonder i accidentally ascended him so many times him#gale telling her to shove it just MAKES MORE SENSE and is the healthier thing to do but it gets you his fucking bad ending wth#okay i suppose him blowing himself up is his bad ending but whatever#apparently him exploding the netherbrain can get you the win for honor mode and as someone who can't even get through balanced mode#you bet your sweeeeeet ass i'm not above sending gale to blow himself up to avoid a run ending fight if i got that far#honor mode is not about getting the ending you want it's just about completeing it and dude there's no way in hell i'll get close otherwise#i'll shut up now#fishgills speaks#fishgills plays bg3#bg3#baldur's gate 3#the dark urge#bg3 durge
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genuinely always so shocked to see mirei hate. like literally god forbid women do anything.
#contra.txt#y5 haters in general... does playable haruka mean nothing to you...#DOES SHINADA TATSUO MEAN NOTHING TO YOU...#for legal reasons this is a joke people are allowed to feel however they want about whatever it's just viddy games#and i fully acknowledge y5 and its litany of flaws#of which there are certainly enough for any given individual to justifiably dislike/hate its entirety but I AM A Y5 LOVER THRU AND THRU#saejima's arc is just an arguably less interesting rehash of the one he had in 4?#(jail; jailbreak; betrayed by his lil buddy guy#but now we're sans the interesting character stuff of his feelings regarding the hit. & also i miss his hair.#& that's not even to say i think saejima is boring in y5 i think there's some interesting subtext to take away from his character#unique to this entry but it's pretty hard to deny how much is literally just y4 again but now he's bald)#BUT WHO GAFS he got buffed to hell gameplay-wise and punches bears now#and also baba's a great character and he doesn't have to do a whole chase minigame if a cop sees him anymore#bloated/unfocused feeling in general to the game?#WELL THAT'S JUST MORE CONTENT BABY!!! only a real issue if you're a completionist imo#+ are u telling me you don't wanna drive a taxi? u don't wanna play a video game in which the goal is to drive as normally as possible?#and i loveeeee multiple protagonists yay <3 y0 y4 and y5 are my favs so far lol (up to y6)#kiryu's inclusion in y5 also feels way more justified than in y4. he was so tacked on there i'm trying to remember what he even really did#other than tiger dropping as a boss fight before instantly forgetting how to tiger drop the second he became playable#and losing track of yasuko and getting tag-teamed by akiyama and tanimura (cough) and beating up daigo#but in exchange akiyama becomes the protag that feels kinda tacked on in y5. way less so than kiryu in y4 tho for sure#anyway. weird/strangely justified plot beats? WELL THAT'S JUST EVERY YAKUZA GAME#an arguably strange/poor writing choice for majima especially given how he ended up being written in y0?#well honestly other than the age thing i think it makes him more interesting... he's kinda fucked up!#but i do get why people are /really/ not a fan of it. ik i just said i think it makes him more interesting but if it gets retconned#or even just never mentioned again i wouldn't be surprised tbh#but additionally he's not even a major character in y5 so it feels like it's not really a significant complaint imo#anyway anyone can do this ('this' being acknowledging the flaws of a thing and then letting how much they otherwise enjoy#said thing determine how much they let said flaws influence their overall opinion) ...such is the beauty of subjectivity... i love you.#yakuza
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people begging me to do something to make a certain someone happy aren’t taking into account that i hate this person and i will revel in the knowledge that i kept them from getting the most perfect version of what they wanted. in fact i hope they mourn the loss of this for the rest of their life and die unhappy about it
#i wish i could do worse. i wish i could go through and ruin everything i ended up giving them (all against my wishes) and i wish#i could ruin everything they love because god do i hate them and i will laugh when they finally fucking die#i have no idea why everyone glosses over all the shit this person has done to us and all the pain they’ve caused and i can’t fathom why#everyone wants to make them happy and why they’re willing to beg and bribe for me (and one other person who also hates them) to#give in but it is amusing and i hope they all fucking cry about it like oh nooo did poor [REDACTED] not get something they will never#get another chance to have ? oh well that sucks so bad for them i’m oh so sorry i caused that i can’t believe i managed to ruin their#chances for this how awful that this person i hate who has done and gotten away with so many horrible things didn’t get their perfect#little fantasy how sad we should all comfort them and call me a bitch who has no respect for anyone#god sometimes i wish i gave into violence more in the past bc i wish i got to fucking beat their ass up back when it would be self-defense#unforch i will never get to now. SAD!#i suppose i have murder fantasies and the thought of being able to ruin their funeral to soothe my soul#and the knowledge that i could make them fucking hurt by refusing to cooperate w them#and ough every time an opportunity presents itself for me to fucking take back what they took from me arises i have to fight myself#on it bc everyone will know it was me. i don’t even want what they have i just want them to know they will never get it back and#god it would upset them so much but they never should have had it in the first place ough if i get the chance before i ditch everyone here#for good i’d want to take it and stick around just long enough to hear how much they’ll cry about it before i fuck off#unforch i would need to know where all of their copies of things are but fuck i hate knowing they’ve taken so much from me bc i didn’t#get a fucking choice and they think they have to right to keep it all bc oh it makes them so happy they love having it they’re so fucking#afraid of losing it but it’d be so easy and i doubt they’d even notice for a while and i genuinely could disguise it as a mistake something#got misplaced some files corrupted etc etc but whatever this is fantasy a sweet little daydream of mine my second fantasy involving#them has smth to do with setting their house on fire and my third fantasy is desecrating their grave when the time comes#okay i’m done w this lalalalalala *skips off into the distance* i think revenge is not productive but god is it delicious to think about
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my depression is getting really really bad. like it’s been bad before but this is like… consistently really bad. like a long unending stretch for several weeks (and tbh months) now. to the point where no inoculation actually sticks (and im isolating myself from most of my inoculations anyway and feel unable to stop doing it even though i know it’s self destructive). im either helplessly unbearably miserable or numbing out on video games. i just don’t feel like it’s going to get better for me and i KNOW that is factually untrue but the feeling is louder than the knowledge and it’s just utterly immobilizing. ive been sinking in quicksand for 2 years.
#purrs#longer than that too ofc but i think ever since i moved to campus in 2021 and shit started hitting the fan my life just started snowballing#and picked up speed majorly when i moved back home and ive been stuck in this horrible limbo ever since. like im scaring myself with how#deeply profoundly unhappy and unwell i am. i am just detached and scattered and bewildered by everything. and the only way to break free is#to fight it but i don’t even have the strength. like in order to fight it i have to have the strength and it s exactly the thing that is#being stolen from me. and i work really really hard to suppress it when im around people so no one can tell but on the inside im being eaten#alive and every day that goes on the pain gets harder to bear except im numb most of the time so i can’t tell except for when i can#one of the things that makes me saddest is ive pushed everyone away either by ghosting them or scaring them. when what i want and need the#most is love and comfort. but then when i get it it isn’t enough. idk. im not explaining it well i just feel like. horrible. unbearably#i think i need to go on meds like i truly cannot go on like this not even in a s*i cidal way it’s like i just can’t take living like this#delete later#i know im causing the people who love me pain by being unable to accept that they do love me and that’s the worst fucking part. is hurting#people by being like this. scaring people by being like this. and being so disconnected from myself#and feeling completely and utterly beyond help like nothing ive tried has fixed it but also there are a lot of things i haven’t tried but i#feel so terrible or my freedom is limited so i can’t. idk.#also the crushing knowledge / sense that i have lost the most precious important years of my life both bc of the lockdown and bc of mental#illness lol. except that’s not true bc of all the stuff abt how your best years are always ahead of you and you can make them. but it doesnt#feel like it for me and then i beat myself up bc my job is literally to exude that belief and help other ppl feel it and i increasingly cant#i remember in high school having the thought that one day i could be depressed and being conscious that i wasn’t and now i look back on that#and am like… how. and will i ever not be. i don’t think so. it just feels unending
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FRUIT LORE! FRUIT LORE! FRUIT LORE! FRUIT LORE! FRUIT LORE! FRUIT LORE! FRUIT LORE!
#zoro once again sacrificing himself to fight.....#komachijo cant die.... enough people with names starting with a k have died... (kiku kin and kanjuro) maybe its a curse....#who's who was a marine.... WHAT IS THAT cp9 too..... OHHHHH 13 YEARS AGO SHANKS STOLE THE FRUIT!!!! FROM THE GOVERNMENT!!!!!#SHANKS LORE SHANKS LORE!!!! I CANT WATCH ANOTHER EPISODE TODAY FUCK!!!! I WILL GO INSANE TONIGHT AND GET ANSWERS TOMORROW I GUESS#talking tag#watching one piece#episode 1039#nami promoted zeus aldjsksjsk#the info he stole?? who?? and who is dead?? oh whos who.... he can die i guess he already told jinbe#the heart pirates saying luffy doesn't have a pulse and a smash cut to jinbe saying he is alive 😭😭#jinbe and luffy retrospective.... i love them so much.... best thing to come out of marineford.... .#jinbe saying he doesn't want to speak with him ajdkajsk slay......#nika mention.... omg.... the sun pirates of course... I AM TELLING YOU!!! NIKA IS URANUS THE THIRD ANCESTRAL WEAPON AND THE THREE OF THEM#WILL BRING THE GYOJIN TO THE SURFACE (TO THE SUN!!) <- me when i connect two dots#jinbe got tired of the racism. BEAT HIS ASS!!! BREAK HIS NECK!!! LETSGOOO!!!!#he got him by the tail.... is the secret technique a gyojin haki special????#episode 1040#yamato furry??!?!?!? damn ace really got the whole deal jesus.#informed consent akdhaka here we dont do medical malpractice lmao is he scared of needles???? lmaooo#this sounds like a me in my gf's ear audio akdhaksjsk#now just noticed that the franky shogun robot has chicken legs just like franky 😭😭#the fucking helicopter tryceratops..... what the hell..... and what is what sword.....#luffy dead on his pirate doctor friend's boat but there is no doctor on board akdhaksk#episode 1041
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think letting me get into transformer was a really really bad idea I kinda thought id just read mtmte and call it a day but I went beyond that and am making a personal mini reading list of stuff I really want to get through and then my supplemental reading like ok. so maybe. i just like reading comics. with a fuckass continuity. I am easily entertained.
#croak#debated for a momen to put the g1 cartoon on while I did animation hw#fighting th eurge but its like#dude why nto u already binged earthspark while doing animation hw#im scaredddd#guys i am not beating the 12 yo boy interests allegations in my fucking frnd grouppp#now who wants to help me learn what gunpla to get as a beginner
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yesterday i!!! went & finally finished the final boss of octypath 2 because i never did that <3 smiled very widely at all of hikari’s lines naturally. <33
#lem text#octo2 talk#⛵️#beat it FIRST TRY because i’m awesome at this game. B) <33#i could never manage to beat 1’s final boss but that was a couple years ago…. so maybe i would be able to now.?#I DO STRONGLY MISS. A CERTAIN CHARACTER FROM 1. i’m just so attached to the qol changes in 2 hfmnkdn but maybe i’ll pick it back up <33#i could also go through 2 again if i wanted to i had a lot of fun <33.#you would just see me add like five side characters to my f/o list within like a weekKFND <33#I LIKE LITERALLY LIKE FOUR CHARACTERS WHO YOU HAVE TO FIGHT. HKFND I COULD FIX THEM IM VERY CUTE AND CHARMING.!!!!!!!!
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Did I stay up until like 3:30 A.M? Yeah! Was it worth it? Maybe! Did I finally beat gunfire reborn? Hell yeah!!
#this is actually such a big deal to me#yeah it was with a dlc character but fuck you i do what I want#yeah it was only on elite mode but fuck you i do what I want#now everybody clap before I send my three weed smoking girlfriends after you#ignore how I recorded this with my phone balanced on itself precariously#I don’t have anything to record on my laptop and this was a spur of the moment thing cause I was like holy shit I’m gonna beat final boss#so I paused the game pulled out my phone and started recording it#I wonder if this is the high those people who record school fights feel
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I really am beginning to get murderous impulses
#if she doesn't start respecting me she is going to very soon do something and I will not be able to control myself#and I will end up beating her into a pulp#and I HATE to admit that. I do not want to do that.#but I am so scared that I'm gonna get pushed too far and because I don't have flight or fawn options I'm gonna react with fight#I'm so tired of this. I'm so tired of walking on eggshells.#I'm having trouble with my relationship with my m*ther because we're both targeted.#y'know. the woman who simultaneously neglected/enabled neglect on me and was far too close to me#whatsit. emotional incest? that isn't even scraping the top of it#the woman who thought it was real fun to chase me around the house and beat me up every time we washed up the cutlery#the woman who I now have a close relationship with that I DON'T WANT#I should've killed myself before we'd even left home#I should've hung myself the moment I heard the knocks at the door#I don't wanna live in a house where I'm scared of being gassed because she keeps putting bleach in the toilet and denying it#and I KNOW it's chlorine because of the smell#because there's a line of rust down the back of the bowl from the leak that she won't acknowledge#of getting beaten up for not wanting food poisoning#of her screaming at me that I don't have anything wrong with me despite evidence to the contrary#of her fucking with everything I own to the point where I'm gonna develop a hoarding problem OUTSIDE of the ocd hoarding#my grandpa and m*ther have!#I don't have enough of the symptoms to have ocd despite having a few of the major symptoms#but I think that's from other issues#but god. I'm gonna fucking do something drastic soon
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apparently someone in my fucking gsa is a racist cunt who keeps creeping on my little sister. this is the final straw i think
#im gonna talk to the teacher who supervises our group for advice bc the creep talks to her constantly#but if nothing comes out of that im gonna fucking go after her myself. she has no fucking right to do the shit she does.#if im the only one who's gonna call her out then so be it#nobody wants to call her out bc she's neurodivergent and everyone wants to use that as an excuse for her dogshit behavior#nobody fucking cares!! im neurodivergent too and im still completely capable of not creeping on a 15yr old!!! what the fuck!!!#also it's bc she's a trans girl so i guess she's incapable of bad shit in their eyes?? news flash!! she's not fucking immune!!!#she can be JUST as much of a creep as cis people!! my trans ass will beat her trans ass into the ground if she doesn't stop this shit!!!#sorry. im so fucking angry. ive been angry all day bc some bitch tried to beat me up earlier and his friends started going after me too -#- so ive got a target on my back and then i hear about THIS bullshit and now i need to fucking hit something or im going to die#i have nothing to hit though and pacing isn't helping. so im going to force myself to sit down and watch something stupid and eat junk -#- food until im distracted enough to not feel like my nerves are on fire. then ill spend the rest of my night high off my ass so ill be -#- able to sleep without feeling like i need to fight someone.
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del
#somethign i keep thinking abut thats really simple but impacted me quitea bit is when sable said like...#keeping constant tabs on people who wantnothing to do with you and seem to be fine moving on without you is destroying you#i think that is definitely also a part of what was almost a shell shock of clarity for me?#and the whole like. pretty much get out of my life thing the whole moving on thing#i think its because like. i considered them my whole life. so to realize + even be told that like. idk. its done its over pretty much#without even really a second thought#when all ive been having is second thoughts up until that point. i was willing to go through hell for what id done. for forgiveness#and then having that stomped on. my hurt and my pain that no one had to read. calling me disturbed. vomiting at my thoughts#in my weakest moments. where i was belly up. it changed my view entirely. that i am not even worth a second thought to these people#my mourning. my own disgust in myself and my own actions. not enough. still even in my own space am i revolting to them#i dont wanna say i felt like i was shown true colors but i do kinda feel like i was shown true colors#it would not be the first time with this group where i was shown such an ugly uncharitable mean spirited and devoid of faith in me reaction#to a mistake i havemade. i cannot even remotely imagine the people im with now responding to *anything* like that#even if i had done something reprehensible. there would at least be some sense of “i care about you so much” in any response theyd give me#even if disappointed. even if revolted by me. there is no such thing with the rest of these people ive known. not even slightly#the want and need to mend something important to you. to fight for it. was just not there in regards to me. they only care about themselves#and what happens to them#cus qhen i tell you i was sitting feeling absolutely awful over the things i was reading that they were going thru.#just to turn around and be strangled and beat for my own reactions to the situation... like. night and day by a certain point. night and day
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