#now mom is crying hard now :( college is shit but atleast im not home to hear him screaming at everyone at nigjt
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it would feel so nice to work towards a career that has meaningful impact and makes millions of people happy
#i follow this person cleo abrams on youtube and she's always talking so excitedly about scientists#and their amazing discoveries cool facts and she's so excited and starry eyed and hopeful#she genuinely just wants to educate people and has so much hope that we can make the world a better place#also like idk maybe unrelated but i saw the mv of new romantics and just. wow#say what you will about her but there's no doubt she's made an insane number of people happy SO HAPPY that they're crying#so many tours#idk i want#i wish my life was bigger#i feel so isolated and always just focusing on myself my career my health my enjoyment#what about everything everyone else#i keep trying to be completely okay with being alone i keep telling myself to not need anyone and be 100% independent#find happiness within hobbies interests#but it feels like a losing battle#i don't know i just. miss everyone 😭😭😭😭#but it hurts too much tbh always more sad than happy always more crying than laughing#i miss my bestfriend i don't know what i did wrong but she won't pick up my call she keeps saying she's busy#i don't want to be clingy because she hates that shit i don't want to drive her away but she's my only friend#i miss my fucking mom she doesn't care if i live or die obviously but i miss just having her presence in the house#and even tho my sister is here she's never fully present always on her laptop working#i wouldn't really say i miss my dad but wow it's been so long since mom and dad stayed together at home it was almost#always miserable but sometimes at the lunch table it was nice#i don't know everything and everyone is moving and changing so fast and i can't breathe under it and it's already september#but this entire year felt like a blur it's like everyone who left took a chunk of my heart with them#and i should be happy because im so close to the exam which will get me out of this house finally be financially independent#like i wanted since i was 11 i could finally start my life#but it all feels so. i don't know the whole future seems black like i can't imagine life past november 2025#how do you imagine happiness if you've never been happy?#and all these feelings are making it so hard to study and studying is so fucking important because if i don't ill be stuck here forever#and i don't want to go thru attempts fail and pass again atleast back then i had a reason first heartbreak‚ not getting to go to college#but what now why now i don't even understand i know objectively i do not have it that bad it's literally better even if i compare to my own
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Has anyone ever made fun of your taste in music? No because my music taste is SO varied.
What’s your favourite season of the year? I’m gonna go with Autumn.
Do you have pop-tarts in your house right now? No, we don’t have those things!
Is anyone’s birthday coming up? D’s on Saturday...
Does someone owe you over twenty dollars? I owe noone nothing.
Do you remember who you liked in grade eight? No haha.
When was the last time you burned any part of your body? My mouth today or yesterday on food, I don’ remember because all my days have blurred into one since being ill.
Have you ever overflown a bathtub? I don’t actually think so.
Are you dressing up for Halloween this year? I doubt it.
Have you ever called somebody dollface? Ew absolutely not.
If I gave you ten dollars, what would you spend it on? I’d say a Mcdonalds but I feel like shit so not that, i’d probably be boring & save it for something.
Have you ever thrown food at a stranger in a movie theater? No.
What are you most excited about right now? I have literally nothing to look forward too... Though I would say my brother gets his GCSE results next week so finding out those.
Does / did either of your parents serve in the military? Nah.
Are you somewhat of a perfectionist? Yeah for sure.
Do you like sour candy? Yeah I love! Especially Haribo Tangfastics.
Where would you like to go on your honeymoon? Hawaii.
Do you have Verizon? No?.
What do you do to stay awake when you’re tired? If i’m tired, I sleep.
Are all nighters something you have grown used to? I couldn’t now if I tried haha.
Do you usually wear sunglasses when you’re driving? Don’t drive, but yeah when i’m a passenger.
Do you wear your shoes around the house? Hell no, wherever I am, my shoes come off!
Is there ever a time that you enjoy cold showers? Summer!
What clothes are you most comfortable in? A comfy tee/giant hoodie & whatever knickers im wearing.
Is there anybody you’re not ashamed to tell anything to? My best mate Tash.
What has changed most about you in the past year? My home life & my health neither in a good way.
Are you good at painting nails? Yeah.
Smoothies or slushies? Oh I like both.
Are you good at filling silence in awkward situations? Nah, I just switch off.
Ignoring nutrition, could you live off veggies for the rest of your life? Yeah definitely .
Elaborate on a way you have volunteered? I have no idea.
Do you use a full length mirror daily? Yeah, I have a huge one that’s in my hallway..
Can you walk in heels, or do you feel awkward in them? Yeah I can walk in them perfectly fine, my mum has worn them every day for over 30 years so i’ve learnt from the best ha.
Any TV shows you sit down weekly to watch? Teen Mom OG & Teen Mum UK because i’ve watched OG for the last 10 years & I come from the UK sooo... Tbh it’s mainly Youtube uploads I wait for. Don’t know the last tv show I actually watched on normal telly tbh that wasn’t on Now Tv or Netflix.
Does anybody know about your sex life other than your partner? Yeah, some of my friends I guess?
Even if you don’t like politics, do you still have opinions on the issues? I do.
Are you one to sneak food into movie theaters? I haven’t seen a movie at the cinema in years. I want to see Once Upon a Time in Hollywood so someone best come with me.
Will you tell someone if there’s something in their teeth? Yea?
Do you ever actually make your bed? Never, only when i’ve just washed the sheets.
Do you make an effort to eat healthy? Kind of but only because i’ve wanted to loose some weight, I stay within a certain, quite low calorie limit atleast 6/7 days & some days just eat way less cos that’s just how it is.
How are things between the person you like / love / are with? Good, fine, same as ever, even if he is a pain in the ass.
Where did you sleep last night? In my bed.
The last time you kissed someone, what colour of shirt were they wearing? Monday & they weren’t wearing one lol.
What year do / did you graduate? School, 2008, college 2011 & OU not til like 2023.
What kind of booze did you last take shots of? Mate, the thought of alcohol/shots makes me wanna throw up, I have no idea, probably vodka though.
What’s something you want to purchase next time you’re at the mall? I need to go to Lush for a new body scrub.
Has someone of the opposite sex ever told you that you were sexy? Yeah.
If you could see any musician live, front row, who would you choose? Fuck, so hard because i’ve already had better & had my best mate take me with working passes to Fall Out Boy where we spent the concert in the sound bit in the middle of the floor (he’s a sound tech) & had them sing 2 feet away from me with no barriers while I sat with the tour manager & it was just the best experience ever. I have a video with Patrick smiling at me singing Immortals while I was trying not to cry & well yeah.
If you had to choose between a million dollars or to be able to change a regret? Money, because I can change what I regret whenever I want too.
Are you taller than your mom? Nah, i’m 5ft & she’s 5ft 2.
Have you ever been around someone who was high? Yeah, who hasn’t haha.
Do you prefer to take your showers at night or in the morning? Night time, it’s how I relax.
Think back to June. Were you in a relationship? Yeah.
What’s so special about what you’re wearing? Nothing, it’s just a big tee & knickers lol.
Do you have any ‘naughty’ photos on your phone? :).
Could you handle living with a male roommate? I lived with Dan for like 5 years, so in a relationship yeah.
What were you doing at 10:00 this morning? Sleeping.
Why aren’t you texting the last person you kissed? It’s 5 past midnight.
Do you think anyone has feelings for you? Yeah.
What do you miss the most about your past? Having more money, D being well & home.
When is the next time you will kiss someone? Idk.
Has anyone taken their shirt off in front of you? Yes lol.
Plan on getting drunk or high tonight? No.
In the past week, have you cried hysterically? Yeah, in pain & just because I cry a lot so multiple times.
Do you think you’ll actually live a happy life with somebody? I hope so, or I won’t bother.
Are you on birth control? No, haven’t been in years.
Did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night? No, don’t think so.
Last time you were really happy? This weekend I guess.
Do you tend to fall for players? No.
Have you ever asked a boy for advice? Yeah.
Are you wrapped in a blanket? Yes, so cold.
Did you get a full 8 hours of sleep last night? 7 & a half hours then an hour & 38 min nap.
Have you spoken to your mother today? Father? No & no.
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Do all the asks coward
1. what does your wallet look like?
-i got it as a present from my uncle for christmas and its really expensive but also so ugly im sorry uncle tom. its like that ‘southern fashion’ bullshit that white MAGA moms wear. but it was better than my old wallet, which looks like this and i got when i was 12:
2. favorite color?
- baby pinnk
3. do you own a pride flag, or more than one?
-heres the thing: my parents basically know im not straight but i havent told them. my brother has thought i was a lesbian since freshman year, i have a small pride pin on my backpack, ive never been on a date, its complicated. but no, i dont have one. maybe one day, hopefully.
4. describe your favorite outfit
-black pants, platform doc martens, hoodie under a jean jacket, one clip on earring, and holding my crushes hand :]
5. when was the last time a girl made your heart flutter, and what’d she do?
-okay so theres this girl in my theatre class who is really cute, and she put her head on my shoulder and shes pagan so she drew a little sigil on my arm that means “safe and homely” so like :)))))))))))))
6. do you use nail polish?
-i do, i mostly do black tho
7. do you keep organized?
-absolutely. i have things online filed accordingly, i pick out my outfits the day before, my binders are neat, i learned how to army fold my shirts, i keep my shit CLEAN
8. ever take naps?
-only accidentally. ill be laying in bed watching youtube and next thing you know my autoplay has me watching a markiplier video even tho i dont like him and its 4 hours later
9. who was your first crush?
-idk if this is a real person or not so ill do both. my first fake person crush was either troy from high school musical or frankie stein from monster high. and my first real crush was on a boy named dominic in elementary school. i told him i liked him at the end of 5th grade because i thought i was switching schools but then i didnt and we never spoke again.
10. what are your crush tendencies? fall hard or often?
-both both both. i am the worst with crushes. i have crushes all the time because im romantic and a fucking fool. i have 3 crushes off the top of my head rn and i like them all for different reasons. thats not to say that i want to date them, but its that i like them a lot and i kinda wanna kiss their cheek or hold their hand idk
11. describe your ideal day
-play overwatch with my best friend (u gonble >:) ) then hang out with my cat, go get a smoothie, buy some cool shoes or something, take a shower and be asleep by 9 :,)
12. describe your ideal date
-i have stated that build a bear is an amazing first date and im NOT BACKING DOWN. ITS CUTE AS FUCK AND ILL ACCEPT NOTHING LESS!!
13. whats your favorite food?
-either sushi or strawberries :3c
14. who do you feel most comfortable around?
-my theatre class, people from camp, and gobble
15. what is your favorite compliment to receive?
-i dont have a favorite, any and all are going to make my face go red so i have to cover it and maybe make me cry
16. did you/do you like highschool?
-the first 3 years fucking sucked but senior year has been amazing so far. mostly because i just kinda stopped giving a fuck but its amazing
17. favorite animal?
-i think its cats now. i really like cats
18. do you like your name?
-eh, its okay. its pretty but also it seems like there are 60 million fucking people named grace and its so annoying. i wish it was something more unique idk
19. what kind of weather is your favorite?
-a light rain. no swinging trees or thunder, just lots of rain. its nice to stay inside and feel secure
20. do you believe in horoscopes?
-absolutely not. but theyre fun if you like them
21. tell us about your music taste
-its horrific. to sum it up, my two favorite musicians are the gorillaz and frank sinatra. take from that what you will
22. have you had your first kiss? if so, what was it like?
-i havent had my first kiss yet. gonna be honest, i felt like i was going to, a few times at camp and recently when classes ended. but yeah, nothing yet
23. did you have a favorite stuffed animal as a kid?
-i went thro cycles of favorites. but one ive had for years is a plush shadow the hedgehog from universal studios i got when i was 6. i used to carry him around, even to a pool once
24. what time do you usually wake up and go to bed?
-if you know me, you know i go to bed ridiculously early. i usually get tried at around 6pm and fall asleep between 7:45 and 8:30. and i always wake up before 6 am. i havent slept past 6 am continuously since the end of junior year. please help me
25. what dream trip would you take with your wife?
-maybe to go explore new york, just the two of us that sounds like fun :]
26. do you have any pets?
-i have 2 dogs and a cat. the family owns the dogs but that cat is mine
27. what pair of underwear is your favorite?
-uhhhhhhhhhhh i have some with rainbows that are cool? i dont have favorites, none of them are cute anyway
28. what makes you smile?
-funny jokes make me smile real hard, and if you compliment me at the right time, i kind of pull my legs up and hide my face? its cute and charming i promise
29. what makes you feel heavy?
-in both the physical and metaphorical sense, eating bread
30. what makes you feel better?
-watching bo burnham always makes me feel better, hes my go to whenever im really depressed
31. how do you show your love?
-i show my love in everything i do. everything i do is for love, i love love so much its sickening
32. when is it time to get a haircut?
-whenever u want to lol?
33. where would you live if you could live anywhere?
-maybe san francisco, its beautiful and i love the city
34. do your friends and family take good care of you?
-as much as i allow them to. sometimes i go days without communicating and i know thats annoying but my friends put up with it (they shouldnt have to, i know) and my family is okay. its cliche to say, but they honestly dont understand what im going thro alot of the times, esp with my anxiety and shit
35. have you always used the labels you use now?
-back in the beginning of highschool, i used they/them pronouns and identified as asexual/aromantic. eventually, it didnt feel right, so i know identify as cis and bisexual and that feels right to me
36. what makes you laugh?
-my friends, when people shit talk gobble and i in overwatch even tho???? we didnt know him?????? and the mcelroys always get me
37. who is your favorite fictional character?
-too many options, see list here
38. who do yo admire?
-my father when hes not threatening to throw my phone into a fucking lake and my friends for putting up with me
39. describe yourself in three words
-i am baby
40. how long does it take you to get ready in the morning?
-usually about 45 min, more or less as each day goes
41. what do you wish you could tell your younger self?
-listen: STOP GIVING A FUCK ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE. YOU WILL NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN, BE YOURSELF. STOP HIDING AND BEING SCARED OF YOURSELF, BE GENUINE!!!!
42. what would you do if you win the lottery?
-get my parents settled, see about other family members, and then distribute the money to charities accordingly, starting with flint and getting them water
43. would you call yourself a romantic?
-yes
44. what is your gayest childhood memory?
-my mom had cosmos magazines
45. do you have tattoos or want any?
-i dont have any tattoos but ive been obsessed with them since the 6th grade. id love to get tattoos, i just dont know what or where and also im afraid of pain
46. whats your worst habit?
-either biting my thumbs, starving myself, or ghosting my friends. prob ghosting my friends
47. what are you proud of?
-i guess coming out of my shell finally? idk, i actually have friends now and it feels amazing tbh. im in 5 group chats now. i havent been in a group chat since 6th grade. :))))))
48. did you know that youre actually a gift to the world, for real?
-hi i love you?
49. whats your favorite memory?
-there are so so many. but what comes to mind first is our dance night at camp where we all stood outside and i finally gave ian my tumblr and we all ran inside to dance to mr. brightside then ran outside again and we requested nightcore and rivers was fucking dancing their hearts out and we all sang along and im going to crying just typing this out
50. do you have a sweet tooth?
-i guess so. too much makes me feel like shit but i do really enjoy smarties
51. what do you like most about yourself?
-this is dumb, but my sense of style. since i got a job ive been wearing shit i actually like and its amazing. ill admit i have cool clothes
52. what makes you fall for a girl?
-besides acknowledging me, probably getting to know me and not like, putting me on a pedestal. idk its weird, ive met a lot of people this year who like to place me so high it feels like i cant make a mistake around them without disappointing them. idk, i want someone to call me out on my bullshit instead of assuring me im okay. i want to know what i do wrong so i can fix it
53. make a recommendation
-for what? uhh okay for music, listen to ‘clay pigeons’ by michael cera (yes i know michael cera) and for television, watch bojack horseman and for movies, watch the docuseries called ‘7 days out’ on netflix
54. have you ever had your heart broken?
-yeah, when i broke up with maddy because we werent ready to date. i cared and continue to care about her and i didnt want to hurt her but i knew its what we both needed. its what i needed, atleast. and i cant be a good girlfriend if i feel like im doing badly. but also ive had friends break my heart and family break my heart. but im okay now, this heart is ready to be broken again
55. when do you feel most yourself?
-def when i was at camp, that place is magical in the way it allows you to be yourself. but also when i talk to gobble because hes my best friend and when im at college, we can talk more and its gonna be dope as shit
56. name a gorgeous celeb
-jake gyllenhaal jake gyllenhaal jake gyllenhaal
57. what are some of your favorite songs this week?
-fake happy by paramore, im not okay (i promise) by my chemical romance, tomorrow comes today by gorillaz
58. tell us 2 or your biggest hopes and fears
-biggest hopes: i publish a book someday & i get a job doing something i love
-biggest fears: i end up homeless and broke & something horrific happens in college
59. what flavor chapstick/lipbalm is the best?
-raspberry i guess
60. are you okay?
-i answered a lot more honestly then i shouldve for some of these and i start new classes tomorrow so im feeling really anxious so im doing alright i guess.
gobble you test me but i do love you
#g0bbleb0ners#that took 90 minutes#also i got kinda real here.... :////////#whatever no one reads these things anyway
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