#now im sitting in my bed eating off brand oreos and hating myself

[just-me-in-my-head]

TFW you've been called mature for what feels like your entire life and you finally realize (once you're going to college two years in advance) that you aren't mature, you just learned to push your emotions down so that others didn't have to deal with tantrums or outbursts and now you realize that you don't have coping mechanisms or friends or any personality at all (surprise, you're also taking sociology and it's fucking you up majorly) and every time you express any emotions you feel blinding rage towards yourself because you're "being childish"

[theycallmegothboy]

1-100 >:DDDD REVENGE!!!

FELIXXXXXXXXXXXX >:(( 1. Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora?  -spotify  2. is your room messy or clean? -it’s pretty messy i guess  3. what color are your eyes? -blue and grey

4. do you like your name? why? -yeah it’s fine 5. what is your relationship status? -single 6. describe your personality in 3 words or less -certified intrusive thot 7. what color hair do you have? -brown and rn it’s red 8. what kind of car do you drive? color? -i dont have a car 9. where do you shop? -hot topic, goodwill, target 10. how would you describe your style? -comfy emo 11. favorite social media account -of mine, probably discord or youtube 12. what size bed do you have? -twin >:(( 13. any siblings? -i have 1.5 brothers  14. if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why? -probably vancouver, idk canada seems lit 15. favorite snapchat filter? -i like the one with devil horns and a tail but its cute 16. favorite makeup brand(s) -i dont wear makeup 17. how many times a week do you shower? -i used to shower every day, but i dont do anything that gets me dirty so like maybe 3 times but if i leave the house then i shower 18. favorite tv show? -stranger things 19. shoe size?  -8 or 9 20. how tall are you? -5′6 with shoes >:(( 21. sandals or sneakers? -sneakers wtf 22. do you go to the gym? -lol no 23. describe your dream date -making some pie or something together and then eating the pie and then sitting on some rooftop looking at stars 24. how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? -quite a bit actually but i’m saving up for a phone lol so soon it will be like maybe 10 dollars lmao 25. what color socks are you wearing? -not wearing socks but the ones i had earlier were white (ankle length) 26. how many pillows do you sleep with? -just one but it sucks 27. do you have a job? what do you do? -NO BUT IM TRYING TO GET A JOB BUT THE FUCKIN PEOPLE THERE ARE GHOSTING ME AND WONT REPLY TO MY EMAILS SO LIKE SBJHBJS 28. how many friends do you have? -like 4 lmao 29. whats the worst thing you have ever done? -idk nothing super bad but i do a lot of small shit that makes me feel guilty when i realize what i did 30. whats your favorite candle scent? -juniper rosewood 31. 3 favorite boy names -leo, clay, charlie 32. 3 favorite girl names -ivy, uh... idk thats all ive got 33. favorite actor? -no clue 34. favorite actress? -no clue 35. who is your celebrity crush? -not a celeb but i’d smash danny phantom 36. favorite movie? -nightmare before christmas or edward scissorhands 37. do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? -no, but my fav book is probably the prince and the pauper? idk 38. money or brains? -CASH MONEYYYY jk probably brains but if your entire personality is being “smart” like fuck off lmao   39. do you have a nickname? what is it? - a bunch of people call me son (see #49, #100), some call me rat, dumdum, goth boy

40.how many times have you been to the hospital? -just once i think when i was birthed. i also went once with my brother cause he kicked some scissors i left out on the floor and it sliced his toe the fuck open and he needed stitches and i watched him get the stitches and almost passed out :/ 41. top 10 favorite songs -please dont make me do this i dont have it in me 42. do you take any medications daily? -yea i take 20mg of vyvanse but i need to get it raised to 30 cause 20 is Not Enough 43. what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) -i got some dry fuckin skin yall dont even know 44. what is your biggest fear?  -it depends. the dark is a pretty constant one though 45. how many kids do you want? -like 2 or 3 eventually 46. whats your go to hair style? -in my face, looking stupid 47. what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc)  -it’s pretty small 48. who is your role model? -i dont fuckin know lmao  49. what was the last compliment you received? - “i belive in you, my son, you’re an amazing human being“ (same friend mentioned in #100, not actually a parent of mine) 50. what was the last text you sent? -”no it’s a raccoon“ YOU GET NO CONTEXT LMAO 51. how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real? -i dont think i ever hardcore believed in him, maybe i did though i remember sleeping under the tree one christmas eve waiting for him but i was like “oh yeah that makes sense“ i guess 52. what is your dream car?  -i honestly dont give a shit as long as it actually fucking works 53. opinion on smoking? -cigarettes? fuck no that’s nastyyy. weed? that’s fine i guess but wait till you’re like 18.  54. do you go to college? -no. am sophomore n highschool 55. what is your dream job?  -musician/palentologist 56. would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs?  -fuck the suburbs lmao, but also im tired of rural, so like.. semi urban?? 57. do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels?  -no but i take the little soaps >:)) 58. do you have freckles?  -yes 59. do you smile for pictures? -awkwardly, yes 60. how many pictures do you have on your phone?  -dont have a phone but i have like 12 on my computer currently. 4 are of me, the rest are of my cat or random shit 61. have you ever peed in the woods?  -yes 62. do you still watch cartoons?  -cartoons these days kinda suck but like if they were good fuck yeah i would like gravity falls can come hang yknow? 63. do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds? -i had nuggets from mcdonalds today so i guess them? i dont really care 64. Favorite dipping sauce?  -i got sweet and sour but i dont like it that much. that schezuan sauce was great 65. what do you wear to bed?  -wouldnt you like to know? ;))  66. have you ever won a spelling bee?  -NO ive only been in two. the first one i misspelled the word “turmoil“ cause i had never heard it before and the second one i spelled the word “owed“ as “ode“ cause i was thinking like ode to joy and then i felt like a big Fool afterwards :(( 67. what are your hobbies? -lol what hobbies 68. can you draw?  -i am physically able to draw, but not well, no 69 (haha). do you play an instrument? -yeah i play a few 70. what was the last concert you saw?  -i saw Chicago in either georgia or tennessee i cant remember in like 2016 71. tea or coffee? -hot coffee, iced tea. NOT the other way around. (i love both though) 72. Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts? -starbucks 73. do you want to get married? -sure why not 74. what is your crush’s first and last initial? -dont have a crush 75. are you going to change your last name when you get married?  -idk maybe 76. what color looks best on you?  -i dont know but i wear black a lot and that’s pretty dope 77. do you miss anyone right now? -yeah  78. do you sleep with your door open or closed? -closed 79. do you believe in ghosts? -on the fence. not 100% “oh my god look at these gHoSt oRbS i need to sage my house!!!“ but i accept that there’s some things i wont understand about the world and that i have no answers to. i wouldnt be surprised if there are, and i wouldnt be surprised if there aren’t. 80. what is your biggest pet peeve? -whatever my adhd decides i viscerally hate with a firey passion right at that moment  81. last person you called -my brother (the 1 of the 1.5 from #13 and the one who sliced his toe in #40) 82. favorite ice cream flavor?  -chocolate is dope 83. regular oreos or golden oreos?  -regular double stuff. if you say golden, mint, peppermint, or thin oreos i’m gonna have to euthanize you, i dont make the rules.  84. chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? -rainbow cause it’s prettier  85. what shirt are you wearing?  -queen shirt from hot topic 86. what is your phone background? -i didnt get a phone between question 60 and now but my computer one is some mountains with the moon in the background 87. are you outgoing or shy? -really depends on who i’m around 88. do you like it when people play with your hair? -YES FUCK AAAAAAA (this girl played with my hair literally once in middle school and i was like oh shit and i had a crush on her until the end of middle school true story,,, so ashley if you’re out there-) 89. do you like your neighbors? -to the left they’re fine and their dog is nice but idk what happened to the horses so that’s sus but that’s where our cat came from so they can hang  guess, behind me they’re fine but their boys are loud, to the right they’re fine, and even further to the right are the dope neighbors and waaaaaaaaaay far to the right is a llama and he’s dope as hell 90. do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? -whenever the fuck i remember to/have the energy 91. have you ever been high?  -i dont think so but i wouldnt put it past myself 92. have you ever been drunk?  -not that i can remember, no 93. last thing you ate?  -sloppy joe from a can 94. favorite lyrics right now -”not gonna waste my life, cause i’ve been fucked up“ 95. summer or winter?  -fall. fuck you 96. day or night?  -night but i like it when it’s actually night and it doesnt get dark at like 4 fucking pm cause that makes me depressed 97. dark, milk, or white chocolate? -dark is good, milk is fine, white is only suitable for fancy stripes on chocolate covered strawberries 98. favorite month?  -i vibe with september 99. what is your zodiac sign -sagittarius (was almost a scorpio but i was holding out >:))) 100. who was the last person you cried in front of?  -in person, my mom like 6 months ago, on a discord call, my friend (i love you by the way, you’re the best,,, i dont think he has tumblr but im just putting it out there) like a month or so ago. i hate crying in front of people, i turn into such a hyperventilating snot monster which is not suitable for human gaze and thats the real tea :/

felix this took like 2 hours of my life i will never get back i hate you and i hope you’re happy with what you’ve done <3 <3

also anyone who wants to stalk me, enjoy this information that im handing to you on a silver platter :)) <3

[ratpresenting]

1-100

Unusual asks! 1. Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? Spotify all the way, I have like, 40 playlists and I use it every day2. Is your room messy or clean?So messy, but I clean it up once it really bugs me3. What color are your eyes?Green-ish?4. Do you like your name? why?Not really, it's a really common name and i don't really feel it fits me, but I'm fine with it. My middle name is Elizabeth and I've always wanted to go by Eli but its too far gone now5. What is your relationship status? I'll stick with complicated6. Describe your personality in 3 words or lessFriendly, obnoxious, anxious7. What color hair do you have?Dirty blond8. What kind of car do you drive? color?I don't have a car, but if I'm saving up for one and its going to be a motorcycle, not a car. 📣(I hate everything about cars!!!)9. Where do you shop?Mostly thrift stores and consignment stores10. How would you describe your style?Like, 80s mom meets 90s grunge meets modern goth witch11. Favorite social media accountProbably twitter at this point12. What size bed do you have? Queen 👑13. Any siblings?A half-sister, shes a little older than me though, and she lives across the country, but i love her and miss her!14. If you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why?Probably Eastern Canada because my family is super Canadian and i just love it there15. Favorite snapchat filter? Idk any really, I guess that one that makes ur eyes and mouth really big because my friend uses it alot and its so funny!16. Favorite makeup brand(s)Mostly Tarte and Urban Decay; Tarte because I'm allergic to most other shit and Urban Decay because I love the Naked palettes and I will suffer for them17. How many times a week do you shower?I wash my hair every few days but I shower like once a week in the winter and every couple days in the summer18. Favorite tv show?Brooklyn 99 or Game of Thrones19. Shoe size?8-ish20. How tall are you?5'9" if I stand up straight21. Sandals or sneakers? Depends on where I'm going, I like my feet to breathe, but boots and sneakers can be so cool and really put together and outfit22. Do you go to the gym? I have a gym membership that I sometimes use, but not having a vehicle right now is imposing on that23. Describe your dream dateA date that keeps going. Starting with food or drinks or whatever, and having such a good time that you keep it going and you go somewhere else, and another place. Enjoying each others' company so much that you don't want the night to end, even if that means staying up until the sun comes up. It doesn't matter if we're just sitting in a park talking and smoking cigarettes, its that neverending want that matters to me. 24. How much money do you have in your wallet at the moment?Cash, $12. I mostly use my debit card so i don't really carry cash25. What color socks are you wearing? I am not wearing socks right now because I am in bed but usually black26. How many pillows do you sleep with?1 under my head but usually at least 3 in my bed, well as all the shit thats on the left half of my bed27. Do you have a job? what do you do? Yes I work at a restaurant called Tokyo Joe's, I'm the unofficial assistant manager, and I am most often making sushi or taking out food and such.28. How many friends do you have? Including work friends I have 5, not including work I have 3. 29. Whats the worst thing you have ever done? Broke up a couple. Its whole thing.30. Whats your favorite candle scent? This candle I got from Ross, its tobacco leaf and Rose, but I'm more of an incense gal31. 3 favorite boy namesCharlie, Adrian, and Danny32. 3 favorite girl namesEli, Andi, and Dani (These and the last 3 are interchangable because I like genderless names)33. Favorite actor? Idk any off the top of my head, mostly because I kind of hate men, I really like Chadwick Boseman's acting, and I really like Leonardo DiCaprio as a person34. Favorite actress? This is really hard because I love lots of ladies, but acting wise I like Charlize Theron and Natalie Portman I guess? Idk I've seen like 7 movies. I love my gal Kristen Stewart though35. Who is your celebrity crush?I have several, more well known being the aforementioned kstew, and some lesser known names such as Lynn Gunn, Paris Jackson, and Hannah Hart36. Favorite movie? This is so hard, I guess the lotr trilogy because I can always watch that if I want to. I'm really more of a tv show kinda gal37. Do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? I used to when I was younger, I stopped when my depression took over pretty much my whole life, but I've been slowly getting back into it. I used to read a lot of teen fiction and my favorite was always Harry Potter, but now my favorite book is probably Through the Looking Glass, just because I loved it as a kid and its a nice nostalgia read, as well as a unique and creative book.38. Money or brains? Always brains.39. Do you have a nickname? what is it? Not really but I wish I did!40. How many times have you been to the hospital?I myself have had to go to the hospital only once that I can remember, ( I crashed my motorcycle) but other than that a few times for visiting family/ friends41. Top 10 favorite songsIn no particular order-Anyone Else, Pvris-Somebody Else, The 1975-In A Week, Hozier-Cherry Wine, Hozier-Pork Soda, Glass Animals-Interlude 1, Alt-J-Agnes, Glass Animals-If I Believe You, The 1975-Obsidian, Trevor Hall-From The Dining Table, Harry Styles42. Do you take any medications daily? I'm supposed to take allergy medicine but I never do so no43. What is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc)Kind of on the dry side, I'm a lucky shit though because I barely take care of it and its pretty nice and soft44. What is your biggest fear? Everyone hating me45. How many kids do you want? A couple, adopted only46. Whats your go to hair style?I have pretty short hair thats curly. The sides and back are short and the top is curly, parted on the left,so it hangs just above my right eye47. What type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc) Smallish condo with my ma!48. Who is your role model? Hannah Hart!49. What was the last compliment you received?My coworker said I have a very elegant air to me, especially when I tell stories, because I always cross my legs and i talk very extravagantly with my hands50. What was the last text you sent?My coworker Kaylee❤ dropped me off and I let her know I was in my house because you can't see my house from the street and she worries51. How old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real?I don't think I ever believed in him?52. What is your dream car? I'm gonna replace car with motorcycle and its an Zero SR ❤53. Opinion on smoking?Unfortunately, I smoke. I love cigarettes! I smoke Newport 100s. I bought a vape to help me smoke less and it definitely helps!54. Do you go to college? Ya, I'm very slowly getting my associates at MCC55. What is your dream job? I have no idea, but something I enjoy doing, and hopefully something that makes changes for the better56. Would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? I truly just want to live in the middle of the woods and be a woodland witch 57. Do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? No, I have too expensive of shampoo for that and thats a stupid waste of plastic.58. Do you have freckles? Not like the classic type, but I have some random ones on my body.59. Do you smile for pictures?Almost always60. How many pictures do you have on your phone? Over 200061. Have you ever peed in the woods? Yes, I've been camping several times62. Do you still watch cartoons? Not really63. Do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds?I don't eat chicken nuggets because they are 1. Chicken and 2. Garbage64. Favorite dipping sauce? Balsamic vinegar or Sriracha, depending on what it is. 65. What do you wear to bed? I sleep nakey 66. Have you ever won a spelling bee?Maybe? I don't know67. What are your hobbies?Sometimes reading, sometimes writing, alot of staring at my wall in the dark while listening to music68. Can you draw? Not well, but thats not gonna stop me!69. Do you play an instrument?Nope70. What was the last concert you saw? I haven't been to a concert in a really long time but i think the 1975? 71. Tea or coffee?TeaStarbucks or Dunkin Donuts?72. Dunkin has better coffee but Starbucks has better literally everything else, and the Starbucks next to my work is literally my sanctuary and all the gals that work there are such sweethearts I love them all so much even though they probably hate me.73. Do you want to get married?Someday far from now, and really only for adoption purposes74. What is your crush’s first and last initial?Denied75. Are you going to change your last name when you get married? Idk it depends if their last name is coer than mine76. What color looks best on you? Probably blue but im partial to black77. Do you miss anyone right now? Yes78. Do you sleep with your door open or closed?Closed79. Do you believe in ghosts?Yes!80. What is your biggest pet peeve? Rudeness just to be rude81. last person you calledMy coworker Kaylee❤82. Favorite ice cream flavor? I'm more of a shaved ice or sorbet gal, but i love the Ben and Jerry's line of almond and coconut milk ice creams!83. Regular oreos or golden oreos? Lemon!84. Chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? I guess chocolate? Rainbow sprinkles are literally flavorless sugar85. What shirt are you wearing? I was wearing an old '92 Hard Rock Cafe shirt from Hawaii that I snatched from my ma and turned into a crop too86. What is your phone background?My home screen is a golden sunset cloud photo I took a while back and my lockscreen is a picture i took in the woods of a tree with mushrooms growing on it87. Are you outgoing or shy?I am usually shy but I work customer service so if I have to be I can be very outgoing, its so draining though88. Do you like it when people play with your hair?Yes! Please do!89. Do you like your neighbors? I mean, I don't know them but 2 of the 3 smoke weed so they're probably pretty cool!90. Do you wash your face? at night? in the morning?Look it gets washed when it gets washed let's not discuss it91. Have you ever been high? I spent ages 17-19 almost exclusively high. I don't really remember a lot of it92. Have you ever been drunk? Yes, several times. I am a lovey drunk and I love to kiss when I'm drunk. Or cry. Just depends who I'm around93. Last thing you ate? Diced cucumbers with lemon and salt and some white rice with peanut sauce and onions94. Favorite lyrics right now"Where does your body go when I leave you alone?Would your heart know if I met you in a brand new set of bones?Cause you may see me in different bodiesHiding below with the same soul"Same Soul, Pvris95. Summer or winter? Winter, but only because I live in Arizona so winter means like, 70 degrees96. Day or night? I like being out and about at night but there's no where to go because everything is closed97. Dark, milk, or white chocolate? Only dark. Like, at least 80% dark98. Favorite month? I like October, the weather is nice and it has a fun atmosphere, plus Halloween!99. What is your zodiac sign?My Sun sign is Capricorn, but I have an Aquarius Stellium and I kind of identify with that more100. Who was the last person you cried in front of? Technically my cat this morning. I don't do alot of public crying. Lots of private crying though! I'm a big baby of emotions