#now i even know when i want to be around someone and when i don't!
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unriding · 3 days ago
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TRYING TO TAKE YOU HOME WHEN YOU DON’T RECOGNIZE THEM. ft. dan heng, jing yuan, mydei, phainon, and sunday.
sfw. f!reader. in which the hsr men try their best to convince you that they really are your boyfriend and not a complete stranger trying to take you back home after a long night out.
cw for implied alcohol consumption. not mentioned otherwise — just the silly scenario where reader seemingly doesn’t recognize them upon first glance. prompt from anon on prev blog! fem!reader for all.
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— DAN HENG.
He wonders if this was truly the best course of action.
“Give me back my jacket, you jerk...” your words come out slurred, barely mustering the strength needed to keep your hold on his sleeve as you trail behind him down the street.
His jacket — he'd usually correct you — but he doesn't this time, lest you eventually come to the conclusion that the mentioned jacket isn't even yours and therefore holds no importance.
“Soon. The agreement we settled on was that if you don't make a scene, I'll give it back.”
It sounds like a threat.
And if someone were to spot him now, this would certainly paint his image in a light that he would much rather not be perceived in, if given the choice.
He knows this all too well — apparent from the nervous sweat collecting along his temples and the frequent clearing of his throat whenever your grip begins to loosen, but you seem to only giggle at the statement now, eagerly nodding along.
“Really? You pinkie promise, stranger? I'll be reaaall quiet then.”
“Yes,” his brows furrow — from either stress or a sense of urgency that you don't seem to have, “I give you my word. So, please, keep your voice down and follow me.”
You respond with a cheerful hum before eventually falling silent again, the street quiet aside from the patter of your clumsy footsteps following closely behind his own.
Though it’s short-lived, much to Dan Heng’s misery.
Only about a minute or two goes by until you start to tug on his sleeve, and his heart nearly stops beating in his chest. Perhaps you’ve already realized. Or perhaps you’ve pegged him as a dangerous type of guy — which wouldn’t surprise him, given the circumstances.
“Hey…” you tug once more, even harder now, and then stop walking entirely — shifting your weight backwards to avoid being pulled straight into him.
Uh oh.
“Hey.... stranger?” You're mumbling now, eyes locked on the floor, and his breath is stuck in his throat.
“I'm sleepy.”
“You.. you want to sleep,” He repeats, still uncertain — his words coming off a bit too similar to that of a question. “Right now?”
You nod, hands coming to rub at your eyes, as if doing so could wipe away the sudden wave of drowsiness that has overtaken you. Though, your efforts prove to be futile in the end, with each blink becoming slower than the last.
“Yes,” you murmur, “Here. I'm going to nap … and then .. and then I need to find my boyfriend.”
Boyfriend. A part of him is relieved you remember, at least. Perhaps the other critical piece of information will find its way back to you soon as well.
Your eyes flutter back open when something familiar is draped across your shoulders. “Don't sleep here.”
“Here,” he turns around, lowering himself onto a knee to gesture for you to climb on. “I'll take you to your boyfriend.”
— JING YUAN.
“My boyfriend taught me how to fight, so don’t you even dare.”
He blinks, once, twice — the hand gently patting your head a moment ago now entirely frozen in place. “Oh?”
It makes sense as soon as you turn to glare at him. While he’s rather certain he hasn’t done anything to warrant such a look, another part of him — his heart, skips a happy beat over how adorable you look, even if you’re not smiling at him like usual.
“I see,” Jing Yuan continues again, only a moment later, taking a seat beside you (and choosing to ignore the way you make the conscious effort to scoot an inch away from him). Sassily so, he might add, similar to the way you so endearingly turn your body away from him and puff your cheek out when he’s teased you just a bit too much for your liking.
His hand finds its way back to you again, slower this time — traces over your cheek until he gently cups it in an effort to feel the warmth radiating from your skin. A chuckle almost betrays him and slips out at the sight of your eyes nearly fluttering shut, subconsciously leaning into his touch until you abruptly come back to your senses and swat at his hand.
He smiles at you. “Hm. Your boyfriend — is that right?”
Your eyes narrow at the amusement in his voice, likely wondering why a stranger would be speaking to you so familiarly. “My boyfriend. The one with a suuuper heavy weapon that …. that you probably couldn’t pick up … with help.”
“Ah, how admirable he must be. You have no need for worry — I would never dream of wielding such a weapon.”
You huff before deciding to face the opposite direction, all whilst scooting a secondary inch away from him. Perhaps a third, for extra measure.
“This boyfriend of yours,” he speaks again, holding back a chuckle when you dramatically sigh at the sound of his voice once again, “surely he wouldn’t mind someone like myself keeping you company until he returns, wouldn’t you think?”
“I have grown quite curious. Perhaps he would allow me to see this impressive weapon for myself.”
— MYDEI.
“Actually, you’re rather comfy, stranger.”
Mydei only huffs in response before glancing over his shoulder from where you’re draped over his left like a sack of potatoes, quickly confirming that … as of now, you still seem content, at least.
“I’ve told you before. I’m no stranger.” The singular arm currently holding your thighs to his chest tightens, and you only giggle against his back, arms freely dangling beneath you. “Yeah, yeah.”
You’ve been surprisingly cooperative. In fact, he thinks he should make a mental note to remind you about being less trusting of strangers tomorrow — because .. surely, it should not have been so easy to convince you that he could simply carry you to your ‘boyfriend.’
Even now, when he’s seemingly been reduced to nothing aside from a mere stranger, you’re as inviting and friendly to him as ever — mumbling something about his strength, followed by a worried “Hey but — let me know if you get tired or anything, okay?”
So, he lets you talk, opting to silently listen to you ramble on about your day (aside from the occasional glances over his shoulder to check on you). It’s only when he hears a sudden shift in your voice that he stiffens.
“Say…” you start, drawing patterns along his back with a finger, as if nervous about his response. “Do you think Mydei’s worried?”
“I don’t want to worry him,” he lets you continue, eyes shifting back to the path ahead of him. “What do you think, strong stranger? He won’t be mad, right? Or sad, maybe?”
He huffs. “No. He wouldn’t be mad. Not at you.”
— PHAINON.
“Oh.” You hug your knees in disappointment to let out another heavy sigh, one far too telling of your emotions — practically seeping back into your lonely puddle when you realize that this person who had found you in your corner was also in fact… not your boyfriend.
“‘Oh?’ Well, someone doesn’t sound very excited to see me.”
The stranger decides to approach you anyway, taking a seat on the tiles beside you before letting out an exhale himself, back of his head coming to lightly rest against the wall. “What’s on your mind?”
“Hmph,” you leer at him from where your head is halfway buried in your arms, knees hugged tightly against your chest. “I wanted to see my boyfriend, not some random person. I’m tired, y’know.”
“Your boyfriend? How strange.” The confusion starts to leave his face the longer he looks at you — lips curling ever so slightly at the idea that suddenly comes to mind.
“He must be cruel … to leave you here all by yourself.”
He almost slips and calls you cute when you stick an arm out to weakly jab a finger into his shoulder, turning your head to the side again to mutter a “Hey. He’s not cruel.”
Truly too cute — the way your eyes have narrowed into something resembling a glare — the same one you always give him whenever you scold him for being too careless. Though, it tends to fade as soon as it comes, replaced with soft kisses against the crown of his head as you lull him back to sleep.
“Aw,” He’s smiling now, “You’re certain he’s not cruel?”
“Obviously I’m certain,” You huff, ignoring the way he seems to look happier at this and hugging your knees even tighter against your chest. “I like being around him. A whole lot, actually.”
The way his eyes begin to soften at your (unintentional) affection most definitely wouldn’t go unnoticed by you, he’s sure, nor the way his hand twitches — wanting nothing but to extend in your direction to pull you in for a hug. Though, luckily enough for him, you’ve settled on resting your head in the comfort of your own arms again, oblivious to the lovesick one seated beside you.
“I’ll make sure to tell him again … when I see him. So let me be, you weird stranger.”
— SUNDAY.
If someone happened to be wondering whether a halovian’s wings flap awkwardly when rendered completely speechless — this would be their golden opportunity to witness it firsthand.
“M-my apologies,” his wings flutter again, then a third time when your hand only tightens around his wrist, eyes narrowing at him in suspicion. “Please excuse me. I was only checking for your temperature, since you seem to be rather…”
“No.” You don’t let go. In fact, you hold onto him as if you’ve just now captured a crook attempting to steal March’s snacks.
“..Forgive me,” his eyes flicker from your hand to your eyes — then back to your hand. As if there may be a slim chance that you’ve simply forgotten about the ironclad grip on his wrist and would release him from his confinement, soon. Surely. “Then perhaps I should go get you a glass of wa—”
“No.”
“…”
“I… I see.” The nervous flutter of his wings shifts to something more sheepish — one wing moving to cover his mouth, as if deep in thought. Which wouldn’t be far from the truth, for even someone such as himself is left dumbfounded by your current behavior. “Then.. is there anything you’d like for me to help with? Someone like March may be better suited for..”
“My boyfriend…” he falls silent as soon as you speak, noting the softness of your words now — barely above a hushed whisper (though the familiarity has him quickly perking up in response). “I want my boyfriend.”
His head tilts at this. Subtly. Truly confused — and even more so when your brows furrow only a second later, followed by a tug on his wrist. “I want my boyfriend.”
“You’re stuck with me until we find my boyfriend.”
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nsharks · 2 days ago
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bleeding blue | apocalypse au
part thirty —other parts
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pairing: Simon “Ghost” Riley x fem!reader words: 3.8k tags: death. blood and gore. zombies of course. AFAB reader. single dad ghost. enemies to lovers. SA and implication of child SA (very subtle). summary: After losing your companions, you run into a skull-masked man and his daughter. They are your last hope for survival. a/n: this chapter is all from Blue's perspective. if anything regarding the abuse or suffering of children triggers you do not read. though it is really not graphic at all (imo) and the SA is EXTREMELY implied and subtle (just a woman looking/potentially touching Blue's private area to check for virginity). I wanted to tell you so there are no surprises.
B
Blue hasn’t been without her father for more than an hour in over five years. There were moments when she'd imagined him disappearing, especially when he said no to her, when he could annoy her, push her too hard, or withhold the words she craved. And yet—now, with her head resting in Twix's lap, she can only long for him. The thought of his absence fills her with cold dread. The kind that erupts goosebumps on her arms despite the stuffy air in the room. Twix’s fingers gently stroke the back of her scalp, but it does little to ground her as her mind drifts to Ghost. He’s alive, that woman said. But it's been over a day, and he still hasn’t come for her.
"Do you think he will come soon?" she asks quietly.
Twix's fingers pause at the top of her hairline. "I think... I think he is doing everything he can to find you."
Blue is old enough to know that is a non-answer.
She knows, deep down, that Twix doesn't think he'll be coming, either.
"I will figure something out, okay?" she promises.
"Okay," Blue whispers noncommittally.
"Hey." A faint smile. "I've done pretty good at getting us out of shit in the past, right?"
Blue mumbles, "I guess so."
But this time felt different from those times. No matter how many times she catches Twix squinting around the room, murmuring things to Nereida, even Blue knows that a bright idea won’t magically appear. Not in here, where there is nothing except the three beds, the bolted cell, and the out-of-reach door that Ghost has yet to barge through.
When Blue's fingers instinctively search for her wrist, Twix’s face softens, and she gently encloses her palm over Blue's knuckles. "Alright. I want you to close your eyes and imagine that beach you showed me once. The one with white sand, and super blue water." Blue plays along with a deep sigh, closing her eyes as she feels a callused thumb brush her cheek. "Almost as blue as your eyes. See it?"
"I guess."
"Good. Now, I want you to imagine that you are lying on the sand, eating all the Twix bars and Nutella you want. Oh, and Grim is there. He was trying to make a sandcastle but got his head stuck in the sand."
Blue's lips twitch despite herself. "This is dumb."
"Dumb? Well, I don't think Grim finds it dumb. He can hardly breathe right now so you better stop eating chocolate and haul his ass up."
Blue snorts quietly, eyes screwing tighter as she imagines it; pulling the bunny out of the sand, giggling, the waves crashing. She falls back onto the sand with him in tow, but he darts away from her hands, toward the water. When she looks over, sun glaring, someone else is there. It's her father, and for a moment she is ready to jump on his back and beg him to play in the waves with her. That's when she notices he is keeled over, ripped apart, bloodied and battered.
Blue jolts, inhaling sharply. When she reopens her eyes, the image is still there. 
"What's wrong?" 
"I just saw—" she rubs her eyes profusely, but he's right in front of her. Blood begins to spurt from a sever in his throat. His head snaps forward, hanging by a thin thread of tissue. "I see him! H-his head is..." 
She jerks upright from Twix's lap, her eyes blinking rapidly as if trying to shake off the vision. When that doesn't help, she buries her face in the pillow, but the image remains too real to ignore. The thread snaps, and her father’s head rolls away silently.
Twix’s voice cuts through, her hands gently shaking Blue’s shoulders, but it feels distant, like a shadow compared to the sickening thud of her father’s headless body hitting the ground. Thick blood pools at her feet, and she tries to move, but her muscles won’t obey. The blood rises and rises, suffocating her, until she can’t breathe.
"Blue, it's just... you're imagining it."
"I can't... I can't..."
Someone flips her over on the bed and hugs her shoulders.
Twix's chapped lips press into her cheek.
"Please, Blue. I'm here."
The touch is enough to drain the blood and free her lungs. Her father's dead body floats away. She gulps for air, cold sweat clinging to her neck, and curls into the body beside her. Lingering panic races through her heartbeat, but then, after a minute, it begins to slow considerably. A new feeling washes over with the force of a tidal wave; fatigue.
Blue suddenly feels so tired that she can't keep her eyes open. It’s as though the terrible images have drained her entirely, leaving only murky water in their place. Her mind begins to float, and the edges of the world blur. Twix's face is in front of her yet feels so far away. Her lips try to part for words to come out, but it takes three tries just to manage: "I feel strange."
Across the cell, Nereida whispers, "I do, too."
Weight shifts on the mattress as Twix tries to sit up, leaning against the wall. Her head dips slightly, then snaps back up. A shaky inhale. "That... that fucking bitch. The oatmeal!"
The oatmeal? Blue’s thoughts latch onto the warm meal they’d been forced to eat, but the memory slips away before she can hold onto it. The slow descent snowballs. Twix’s voice distorts, blending with the chirping of birds outside the window. Her body slides down the wall, crumpling back beside Blue. She tries to hug Twix again, but her arms won’t cooperate.
Minutes later, or maybe hours, Blue hears the metal screech of the cell door swinging open. Veiled ghosts drift in. She can do nothing to run from them. Murmured voices, speaking words she doesn't understand, bleed through the heavy blanket of fog lying over her.
"Vous avez dit que celui-ci était intact?"
"Oui, Maman."
"Nous offrirons son corps pur au Seigneur. Les deux autres seront aptes à avoir des enfants."
"Mais elle est une... Je veux dire, oui, Maman."
She feels something cold and sinuous lifting her—snakes. No, not snakes. Hands. Cold, unfamiliar hands. Twix shouts something slurred. Then Blue is dragged by her feet, her spine no longer supported by the bed. She tries to squirm free, but her limbs feel heavy, useless. More hands clamp down on her arms.
No, no.
She wants to call for Twix, but her voice is muffled beneath a palm, the sound dying in her throat.
A weathered voice coos in her ear. "Sweet child. There is nothing to fear."
She can't scream.
All she knows is Twix is no longer the one beside her.
Cold fear surges through her veins, and she claws at someone’s arm. The retaliation is swift—a prick to her neck.
The strike of pain intensifies her dizziness, the last fight in her body fading away. They're dragging her again. The hard floor beneath her feet melts into soft grass, and the stark white ceiling shifts into a blue, cloudless sky before everything fades to black.
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A gentle melody repeats in her subconscious until she rouses.
The same three-note tune, over and over.
Peeling her eyes open against the buttery sunlight, the first thing she notices is an open window above her head, its thin white curtain dancing in the light breeze. Upon the windowsill sits a small, cooing bird with pearly grey feathers and a black ring around its neck. Its head tilts almost mechanically, two little black eyes regarding her. She stares for a long moment before her eyes fall closed once more, lulled by the familiar call. Only when the bird quiets does she truly come to her senses. The sudden silence jolts her upright.
This isn't the same room she was in before. There hadn’t been a window in the cell, and certainly not one left open. The air there had been thick with the scent of old wood and lingering dust. But here... here, the air is different. It smells of fresh flowers, of the tall grass she used to wade through with Ghost while hunting. 
The bird calls once more before flittering away, leaving her reeling.
"A collared dove."
Her gaze snaps to the right where an old woman sits in a mahogany chair, knitting needles in hand. Without looking up from the red yarn she weaves, she explains idly, "They are very common. Lovely, but common."
The accent of her old voice is nothing like Blue's Mancunian one. But she understands each word.
Her voice pulls through her teeth with great effort. "I don't... Where am I?"
The old woman's brow furrows as if she is deep in thought, but it smoothes over after she undoes a stitch and loops it again, hands moving with an unnatural slowness. "You had them in England, yes? They are very common there, too."
Blue's fingers spread into the fine linen, her pulse ticking as she blinks a few times to sharpen her vision. The woman before her is older than anyone she has seen in a long time, though there is a faint resemblance to a woman deep in her memory who she believes was her grandmother. Unlike the woman who visited their cell with food, this one does not wear a veil over her face. Long wisps of gray hair fall over her shoulders. Wrinkles etch around her eyes and lips. She is still cloaked in white, but around her neck hangs a red cord beaded with a cross dangling at the end.
Her fingers clench. "I don't care about the-the stupid bird. Why am I here? Where are my friends? You..." she swallows the feel of sandpaper in her mouth, "You put something in the food. You made me lose control of myself again!"
Finally, grey-blue eyes flicker up beneath a questioning brow. "Oh, sweet child. You are so full of fire." With an unsettling calmness, the woman sets down the knitting needles on a carved side table. Pressing a palm to the surface of it, she rises slowly, then laces her hands in front of her. "Come, and perhaps your questions will be answered. Though, I wouldn't try to run." She moves toward the door, her gait shuffled but steady. A glance over her shoulder beckons. "Your friends are under my care."
The mere mention stiffens Blue's spine. She forces herself to her unsteady feet, swaying slightly, bare toes digging into the wood planks. Each small step feels lighter than the first time she woke up from being drugged, though her body still protests. Ahead, the woman is already walking away. It wouldn’t take much to catch up, but Blue lingers, her eyes sweeping the room with deliberate caution—always stay aware of your surroundings.
For a moment, she considers grabbing the knitting needle and stabbing the woman. But then what? Everyone, her father included, is under her care, and any misstep could mean their deaths. Ghost always told her to never act without some type of plan—to wait for the right moment. Blue doesn’t even know where the others are.
As she hesitantly steps out of the small house, the realization hits her. There are more people here than she’s seen in a long time. Almost like a town, but not really. Smaller than that, but more than her group. The building they just left is a small, home made of light grey stone. To her right are more homes, smoke billowing from the chimneys. She counts at least four of them. Straight ahead of her is gravel road. This is where the woman heads, with Blue trailing behind her. To the left is a stretch of green lawn, bright and lush. She has the itch to sprint over it, but a voice ends that idea.
"Catch up, girl." 
Gravel bites her toes as she walks to the woman's side. She is still only dressed in the simple, white slip. She hasn't worn a dress before.
"Where are you taking me?"
"There are some things I wish you to see." 
"Why... why can't the friends I was with be here to see them, too?"
From the corner of her eyes, Blue catches the woman smile lightly. "What do you think of France?"
Blue digs her nails into her palms, swallowing down her frustration at the non-answer. "It's... nice, I guess." It isn't a lie. The beautiful beach they left from, the fields of wheat and flowers, were things she'd only imagined before. 
"Good. My husband was from India but owned this land. I never wanted to leave it. France is the most beautiful place. I knew I wanted my son to grow here." She exhales in a quiet appreciation. "My husband said this land would thrive, even after the plague. He was right. The Lord spared it. He did not spare Ashwin, though."
Blue doesn't know what to say to that. If she should feel sorry for this person or not. She didn't state her husband's death in a sorrowful way, merely factual. As they walk, they pass a few men hunched over tree stumps, chopping wood. The smell of fresh earth and spilt sap wafts up her nose. The men glance up, their gazes lingering on Blue a moment too long, making her shift uncomfortably. Then, they lower their heads respectfully toward the woman. She speaks to them in French, and their chuckles follow her words.
Under a warm afternoon, they approach what looks like a large barn, bordered by wooden fence posts strung with taut wires. Inside the fenced area, Blue notices a white horse, smaller than Cherry, along with four cows. More men are working nearby, some tending to the animals while others, farther off, wield sickles to harvest stalks of wheat.
When they stop in front of the fence, Blue can't stop herself from asking, "Where are all the girls at? Like the one who fed us? I've only seen guys so far."
The woman doesn't look at her. "Our community is built around the roles God intended for us. Men have bodies made for working under the sun. Women, like those beautiful young ladies you traveled with, are vessels to be cherished, protected. Especially in these times when they have become rather scarce."
A few of the words fail to make sense to Blue, never having learned them from any of the books Ghost read her. "Um, is that why you separated the girls in my group from the men?"
She hums, a slow sound. "Women are kept in their own quarters with the infants."
"Okay," Blue rocks on her feet and grips the hem of the dress before the light air can catch it. So is her dad one of those men working, then? She squints, confused, and shakes her head. No; if he was anywhere out here, he would've come to her. He must be locked up, too. A wave of anger buzzes in her chest, louder than the cicadas. "That still doesn't explain why you are holding Twix and Nereida prisoner. If women are so special, why are they locked up and I am out here? And where are all the men from my group?" Her mind briefly flashes to the others; Kyle, Price, and... Ari. 
"None of them are prisoners, child. They are merely being readied for the role their bodies were created for, by God."
Blue grits her teeth. "You're not really answering my questions. What about me? Why did you bring me to," she glances back at the working men, who haven't stopped to look at her like the others had, too engrossed in the strenuous labor. "A fucking farm. What could you possibly want to show me here?"
"There is someone I need here before our next stop." She leans closer to the barbed fence and calls out, "Pierre! J'ai besoin de toi et de trois hommes pour nous accompagner jusqu'à la cale. Apporte les chaînes."
A man—Pierre, she guesses—strikes one of the cattle's hindquarters, wipes sweat from the back of his neck, then shouts in French to three others following behind him. They unlatch a gate in the fence and slip inside a small shed for a brief moment, emerging with rusted chains in hand. They approach, causing Blue to falter and step back. An old, strange woman is one thing, but three strong men are another. A fissure of terror cracks through her, and she inhales shakily.
"You need not be afraid."
She blinks up at the woman, who for a moment, conjures something similar to a comforting expression. Blue nods, and then they are walking again, with the four men trailing behind them. The sound of the chains dangling in their grasp makes her feel uneasy. What are they for, and why are they coming with them? She is ready to build the bravery to ask when the woman ghosts a hand on her shoulder.
"What is your name, child?"
"It's... um, Blue."
A soft chuckle. "The English and their strangeness. This is not your real name, is it?"
For some reason, Blue finds the truth stuttering out of her. "No, it's—the name I was born with is Amelia."
"Amelia. Much better. Tell me, Amelia, did your mother have blue eyes?"
Blue nearly chokes, her footsteps halting in the grass as she flinches away from her hand, curling her fingers into fists. "What the fu—why are you asking me that?"
The woman stops beside her and clasps her hands together, the long sleeves of her gown falling over them. She is a small woman, hardly taller than Blue, and can't be any stronger than she is, but something about her emits control. Blue can't look away from her eyes, even as her jaw tightens, stomach swirling.
"There are many answers to questions that can be discovered on their own if one simply looks for them. I know which one of them is your father—"
"How could you know?" Blue demands. "I haven't even said any of them was my dad."
Thin lips twitch at the side. "A daughter gets the shape of her face from her father." A bony finger reaches to trail the edge of Blue's cheek, and she trembles from the cold feel of it. "But the features are all from her mother." She looks away and continues walking, speaking over her shoulder, "A little dove might have also told me he was asking for you."
When the men step forward, Blue is forced to continue walking. It feels hard to breathe, even though the canopy of trees offer fresh, rich air. "Then why are you asking about my mother?"
"Your eyes are blue, but your father's are not. I was simply curious."
"My mother is dead," Blue finds herself gritting out. 
"I figured. Neither of those women were her, and many mothers have been lost. A very terrible thing. A child needs its mother. You will call me Maman, Amelia. This is what French children call their mothers."
"I am not going to fucking call you that. Tell me where we are going," Blue presses, swallowing as she looks back at the farm behind them. Through the gaps between the men's shoulders, she sees that it is rather distant now, along with the small homes. She looks back ahead; nothing but overgrown vegetation. Even the flowers have grown sparse over here. It is quiet and still. She can hear the thrum of her own heart.
"Your fire is admirable, but you need to learn respect." For the first time, Maman's voice carries an edge, one that sends a shiver down Blue's spine. A foreign bird call echoes through the leaves, and the woman holds up a hand, signaling for everyone to stop and listen. "Ah. That’s the Bluethroat, if I’m not mistaken. Much rarer than the dove. You won't often find those in England."
The bird calls again—a trilled chirp—as they crest over a small hill, and the air suddenly grows heavier, more pungent. A smell Blue knows well makes her freeze, but a strong grip on her arm keeps her moving toward the source of the stench: an old, smaller building made of much darker stone. The sharp rustle of wings through the trees fades into the distance, but the tension in her body doesn’t ease.
"You, too, are rare, Amelia," Maman continues, voice steady and unhurried. "A pure, young female like you—so virtuous—carries more favor from God than any other. Your friends have their purpose, and you have yours. Each of us plays a part in shaping the new vision of God's children."
The men move in front of them now, except for one who continues gripping Blue. The tremble in her body intensifies, and a cold pit grows unbearable in her chest, thundering. She is forced to stand about four meters in front of the large door, where one man grips the handle while two others, including Pierre, stand beside it, their hands ready with chains and their stances wide. It’s now, through the stinging film that grows over her eyes, that Blue notices large metal muzzles attached to the chains.
Blue is too stunned—too confused, yet frightfully aware—to move a muscle when Maman procures a knife from inside her robe. Pierre shouts something in French, but Blue can barely hear him. Her senses are fixed on the bead of sunlight glinting off the knife, and on the scratching and snarling she hears from the other side of the door.
"Please—" she gasps, unable to finish the thought.
Maman ignores her in favor of snatching hold of her wrist. Cold fingers force her arm to extend, and a burning pain cries out when the knife slashes a laceration from her elbow to the rim of her palm. 
"Une seule coupure pour les attirer."
The blood weeps, and the door shakes from the ignited frenzy behind it.
Tears finally escape Blue’s eyes just before the door opens. She feels it—the sensation of her body being torn apart beneath rotten teeth. She squeezes her eyes shut, thinking of Ghost, when she hears more shouting and the harsh sound of chains being whipped through the air. When she opens her eyes again, the men are wrestling two Greys into the muzzles.
"Deux c'est bien!" Maman orders, and the door is slammed shut over the others that threaten to spill out toward the fresh wound. 
Blue is alive.
Her arm numb and bleeding. 
Maman yanks something else from her robe—a strip of cloth. She wraps it roughly around Blue's forearm, then issues another command. Without warning, Blue is hoisted from the ground and callously tossed over the shoulder of the man who had held her in place. They start heading back the way they came, the leashed Greys trailing behind them, and finally, a scream rips from Blue’s throat.
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"You said this one was intact?" "Yes, Maman." "We will offer her pure body to the Lord. The other two will be fit to have children." "But she is a… I mean, yes, Maman." "Pierre! I need you and three men to accompany us to the hold. Bring the chains." "One cut to attract them.” “Two is good!”
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heavyhitterheaux · 1 day ago
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Protector (NSFW)
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AN: This is long so be prepared 🫣
Synopsis: You and Joe had been infatuated with each other since you were both fourteen years old. Something happens in your senior year, causing you to have to break up with him and also making you have to hold onto a secret; giving birth to his firstborn child that he never knew existed.
Pairing: Ex-boyfriend!Joe Burrow x Ex-girlfriend!Reader
Do not engage if you are underage
Please Do Not Repost My Content Anywhere
The sun visor in your car came down with the swift movement of your hand so you could gaze in the mirror at your appearance. After applying another layer of lip gloss, you straightened out your necklace that contained his initial which was gifted to you from him on your sixteenth birthdays.
First it was meant for him, Joseph.
Now it was also meant for the little one you two made who wasn't quite so little anymore, Julian.
And after more than ten years, you still had it.
The only time it ever left its rightful place was when you had to clean it.
You still remember the conversation that you had when the two of you were just fifteen about the future that you planned to share with one another.
The two of you were laying down in Joe's backyard on one of the many blankets that your grandmother had knitted staring up at the night sky. It was one of your favorite past times between the both of you.
“So, what are we naming our kids when we have them?” Joe asked as he looked down to see you pick up your head from his chest to look at him.
“Hmm, never thought about it until just now.”
“After we're married of course. I'll be playing in the NFL and you'll be an aerospace engineer at NASA.”
“I don't know if I'm smart enough for all that.” You replied and Joe instantly frowned from your response.
“You are smart enough. Stop talking about yourself like that and selling yourself short.”
“Fine, I'm going to be an aerospace engineer at NASA.”
“That's better and I just thought of a name.”
“Tell me. But we need a name for a boy and a name for a girl so whichever one comes first we'll be ready.”
“I like Julian for a boy. His name will start with a J like mine.”
“You don't want him to be named after you?”
“No, I want for him to be able to have his own identity.”
“Good point and I like Julian too. Now for a girl.” You said as you adjusted to make yourself more comfortable.
“Juliet since you like Romeo and Juliet so much and I have no idea why.”
“Um, correction! I like the movie with Leonardo Dicaprio, there's a difference. Because truth be told they were both stupid as hell. How can you love someone after you've known them for like 2 hours?”
“Are you going to leave him for me?” Joe playfully asked and you rolled your eyes.
“Joseph, don't be stupid. It's us until the end of time, you know that and he is way too old for me.”
As you closed the mirror, you turned around to look in the backseat to see your son looking down playing his game and you called his name to get his attention.
“Julian.”
“Yes, mom?”
He looked up at you with those same blue eyes that his father had and you quickly sighed.
“Let’s make this quick so we can get in and out. Did you still want spaghetti for dinner?” You planned on staying the night at your sister's apartment before making the two hour drive to Cincinnati to your new house. You told her that you would cook dinner since she told you she couldn't even boil a pot of water.
Just like it was when she was 14.
“I guess.” He told you as he shrugged.
“What's that look for, bubs?”
When he was quiet, you immediately knew.
“I know you're nervous about us moving and starting at a new school, but you'll be fine. And besides, you have football camp in a few weeks to look forward to, that your aunt was nice enough to sign you up for.” You told him and he sighed but nodded his head nonetheless.
After you had gotten pregnant your senior year in high school, your mom was the first one to find out and within a week, you were in Texas with your grandmother and refusing to have an abortion like both of your parents wanted.
You had been there ever since.
After finishing high school with literally a month left, you went off to go to Texas A&M University on a full scholarship and then onto Harvard online to do your masters. From that time, you stopped talking to your parents and in turn they didn't allow you to talk to your siblings, Sabrina and Ryan.
You were one of the top engineers at your job in Texas and they recently opened a new facility in Cincinnati and asked you if you would be willing to transfer to get it off the ground.
It took you three months to finally make a decision.
The final thought as to why you were willing to do it had everything to do with Julian.
He was getting older and just about every week he was asking about his father.
His father, who was in fact Joe Burrow the quarterback of the Cincinnati Bengals.
Who also happened to be his favorite player who he was obsessed with.
He didn't know about Joe and Joe didn't know about him.
But that wasn't by choice.
It all boiled down to your parents as well as his, but mainly his mother.
Your younger sister had begged you to come and see her once she messaged you after she found your account on social media once you told her you were moving back to Ohio. However, you made her promise not to tell your parents. If she uttered a word, you would have no problem cutting her off because protecting yourself as well as your son was your main priority.
“Can we make brownies too?”
“With vanilla ice cream and caramel sauce on top.” You replied as you stuck your pinky finger out for him to wrap his around yours.
Robin did a double take as she noticed you in the aisle comparing two brands of pasta and could feel the color drain from her face.
She knew it was you, there was no denying it. You looked the same, but more mature.
She wanted to leave the aisle as soon as possible, but it didn’t quite work out that way since she also needed a box of noodles for dinner.
Hoping you wouldn't take too much notice of her, she made her way over and picked up the brand that she had always bought when you suddenly turned around and she caught your eye.
The expression that flashed across your face was unreadable as you were analyzing her. You were staring at one of the four people that had ripped your future away from underneath you.
The future that you and your boyfriend had planned in high school.
She was the first to speak and you were surprised she was even speaking to you at all. Considering what she had done.
And how much she didn't like you.
“Y/N?”
“Mrs. Burrow.” You flatly said as you threw the box of pasta in your basket.
“I… it's nice to see you.”
“Hmm.” You told her and quickly noticed that you had lost sight of Julian, but more than likely he was somewhere in the candy aisle. But to your surprise you heard his voice from behind you.
“Mom!? Can I get fruit loops!?”
When Robin set her eyes on who she assumed was her grandson, there was absolutely no denying it.
He looked similar to her youngest son except for the fact that he had curly hair which she assumed he got from you. Everything else was Joe up and down.
“You can get the small box.” You replied as you smiled at him go back down the aisle and turned back to Joe's mother.
“Does Joe know you're here?” She said in a soft voice and you were confused on why she even cared.
“What difference would it make if he did?”
“Is he…?” She asked assuming she was talking about Julian and wanted confirmation.
“He's nine and will be ten in December so you do the math and I know you see the resemblance. But for now I'm going to go so I can feed my child. Don't worry, everything is all still going according to your plan. But it's getting kind of hard to keep this a secret, right? I mean paying off your son's girlfriend's parents to keep them and her quiet about the pregnancy so that his future wouldn't get derailed.”
“Who told you that? And I did it for the both of you.”
“Bullshit. You never liked me to begin with and it didn't take a rocket scientist to figure that out and it doesn't matter who told me. You always had it in your mind that I wasn't good enough for him. All I know is that my son is going to know his father one way or another and there is nothing you'll be able to do about it. Good luck begging him for forgiveness. I hope you have a good night.”
Without another word you walked away from her and found Julian in the next aisle holding his box of cereal and browsing the candy aisle just as you suspected.
“We're making brownies, King Julian. So, no candy.” You said as he turned around to look at you.
“But I also need a snack before dinner and who was that lady you were talking to?”
“Stop trying to change the subject and no you don't.”
“Yes I do and I noticed she kept staring at me.”
“She wasn't anyone that you need to worry about because she isn't important and you can get one other thing. Now come on, your Aunt Sabrina is waiting for us.”
“Is she younger or older than you?” Julian asked as he grabbed a Snickers bar.
Just like his father.
“Younger and how old do you think I am?”
“Well I know you're old enough to have wine so you have to at least be 21. How old is she?”
“25.”
“Oh, never mind then.”
“I just can't get over how big he is and how much he looks like Joe.” Sabrina told you as the two of you were sitting at the kitchen table and her gaze was on Julian in the living room watching Netflix.
“The older he gets, the more and more he looks like him. Guess who I ran into at the store before coming here?”
“Who?”
“His mother. She saw me first.”
“Oh shit. And what did she say!? I know for a fact she never liked you. Anyone could see that.” Sabrina asked as her eyes went wide.
“First she was like it's good to see you and then asked if he knew I was here and I asked her what difference would it make if he did? And I basically told her to get out my face. And you’re right, she never liked me and I know for a fact that she thought I wasn't good enough for him or dare I say it the right ‘fit’”.
“I still can't believe how everything went down and how they never told him. Like that's their grandson. You two were supposed to be end game.”
“I know and I just… I hope when I gather the courage and strength to tell him that he wants to be in his life. Julian keeps asking about him and all he talks about is how he's his favorite player. I also hope that Julian won't despise me for not telling him.”
Little did you know that Sabrina had signed Julian up on purpose for the football camp. Not only because you told her how he loved to play but because she knew that Joe was hosting it along with Ja’Marr and Tee. She was going to make sure Joe knew sooner rather than later about how his ex-girlfriend fell off the face of the earth with his kid.
This had gone on long enough and wanted to see her big sister get her redemption story.
“From what I've seen, I think Julian will ultimately be relieved. It wasn't your fault to begin with and it's not like you hid it from him on purpose. And our parents were dead fucking wrong with how they treated the entire situation and I'm sorry that happened. I know I'm not responsible, but I also lost my big sister in all of that. And I'll never forgive them for it. It was like you disappeared off the face of the earth. And I never stopped asking about you.”
“I figured that out of everyone that you would. So when you messaged me, I got excited, not going to lie.” You said being completely honest.
“I only talk to them if it's absolutely necessary. The entire dynamic changed when you left. Do you ever think you'll talk to them? Can't blame you if you decide not to.”
“Probably not the best idea to talk to the people who wanted you to abort your kid.”
“Hmm, I guess not and you make a good point. But enough about that, what have you been up to? Do you really work for NASA?”
“Yes, as an aerospace engineer.”
“Like you always wanted. You were always smart as hell and could run circles around all of us. Only thing I know how to do is hair and make up. The parents were very mad when I dropped out and went to cosmetology school.”
“At least you figured out what you wanted to do and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. There are still people who are 45 years old and don't know.”
“Good point.” You told her as she got up to get the brownies out of the oven that all three of you had taken part in making earlier.
“Oh and the day of football camp is my orientation so I won't be able to take him. Do you think you'll be able to?” You asked and Sabrina tried not to show the disappointment on her face.
“Yeah, sure.”
“But I should be there by lunch time. So I can see him play for the second half of the day. He's really excited to go.”
“Perfect! And I'm really excited too since I have never seen him play before.”
The wheels immediately started to turn in Sabrina's head and she just hoped and prayed that everything was going to work out exactly how she wanted it to.
The day of football camp, Julian had been bouncing off the walls from the moment he woke up. As promised, Sabrina stayed over the night before so that she wouldn't have a long morning in rush hour traffic trying to get to your house and then eventually the stadium on time.
To her surprise, when she got there and signed Julian in, Joe was nowhere in sight but she was still holding out hope as she looked over at Julian in his black jersey with his rightful last name across the back of it.
She learned last night that he had a jersey in every color, which had been your doing of course.
You had explained to her that every day was a battle on if the day finally arrived that you were going to tell him the truth. I mean what possible harm could it do at this point? When you were younger, you had been terrified of your parents, but not anymore and you were done keeping your son a secret.
When you finally gave birth to him on December 10th which also happened to be your birthday along with Joe's, you were instructed to not even give him the Burrow last name which was a part of the deal that was made between both sets of parents.
A deal that neither you nor Joe was a part of.
And none of them showed an ounce of remorse for what they had done.
About two hours or so into the day, Joe made his way to Paycor stadium since Ja'Marr had asked him and Tee to participate in a football camp with him for kids ages 5 to 17.
Tee had sent a text to let him know where they were and after parking his car and walking into the stadium he made his way over and was immediately greeted by the both of them.
“Joe, we think we found your long lost son.”
Ja'Marr joked with him as he gave him an eye roll in return.
“What in the world are you talking about? It is too early for your nonsense and Tee is no better for going along with you.” Joe told him and Tee held his hands up in defense.
“Now what did I do!?” Tee exclaimed while looking at him.
“An entire list so don't get me started now what kid are you talking about?” Joe asked and he followed Ja'Marr’s gaze to see.
“That one and look at that, he plays quarterback.”
“He is literally you with curly hair and freckles.” Tee added as he would glance at Julian and then glance back at Joe comparing the two.
“What's his name?” Joe curiously asked as he was watching him do drills.
It was almost as if he was looking in a mirror.
“Mm, Julian I think.”
Hearing the name out loud made a wave of emotions come rushing back towards Joe and he was trying to do his best and not be upset about it.
That was the name you two decided that you were going to name your baby boy whenever it happened.
Because Joe had been dead set on marrying you and he didn't want anyone else.
He still thought about you every day and knew that deep down he would probably never get over not knowing what happened to you and what made you suddenly break up with him for no reason.
It didn't make sense then and it still didn't make sense now and no matter how hard he tried to wrap his mind around it, he just couldn't.
He tried to move on multiple times, but he found himself always comparing his girlfriends to you no matter how hard he tried not to.
You meant absolutely everything to him and you were one of the very few people who believed that he would go on to do amazing things in college and eventually the NFL. From day one, your nickname for him was superstar or MVP.
“Wait…..” Joe started to say, but his focus was now solely on Julian.
“What?”
"Me and my ex-girlfriend picked out the name Julian for our son when we were in high school.” He said nonchalantly as he shrugged his shoulders.
“Uh? You didn't get her pregnant did you?”
“No, she definitely would have told me. But it was weird because one day we were planning our future together and the next she was breaking up with me. The entire thing never made sense. I literally haven't seen or heard from her since we were 17. What's his last name?”
“Deveraux.”
At that very moment as soon as the name left Tee’s mouth, Joe thought that he was going to throw up.
Ja'Marr and Tee both looked at him confused.
“Uh? You okay over there?”
“No. That's her last name.” Joe quietly said as he pinched the bridge of his nose.
“I… well maybe it's a coincidence.”
“How!?! That isn't a common last name!”
“And you having a mini meltdown isn’t helping the situation either. We’ll figure it out later when camp is over. For now we need to break them off into groups based on their age and get them ready to play against each other.”
The camp was only supposed to last from 9 am until 3 pm and as promised, you were actually allowed to leave early and looked down at your phone to see that Sabrina sent you the address to where it was held. Once you put it into your GPS since you were still learning your way around Cincinnati, the Paycor stadium popped up on your phone and you did a double take.
No.
Absolutely not.
But you also thought, it was still the off season and training camp wouldn’t start for a few more weeks. The likelihood of you actually running into him was slim to none. So that way you still had time to process and run through what you were going to say to him when you actually saw him.
Because it was bound to happen one way or the other.
All because his mom saw you and will more than likely tell him but fail to mention the child that you two share.
Once you got there, you spotted Sabrina’s car and quickly backed in next to her before making your way to one of the many gates that surrounded it to make your way inside. Once you told them you were here for your son, one of them was nice enough to walk you over to the field where all the parents were gathered. You quickly spotted Sabrina and she waved you over.
“Sabrina….”
“What’s wrong?”
“Why didn’t you mention that the camp was going to be held here and hosted by several Bengals players?”
“Oh, that? Um, I didn’t realize until we got here.”
“You were always bad at lying so I suggest you change your answer.” You told her as you crossed your arms and looked out towards the field and spotted Julian.
“Okay fine. I figured the sooner that Joe knew about Julian, the better. As soon as I saw that they were doing a camp before they started training camp in a few weeks, I immediately signed him up. And this was right after you told me that you were moving back here.” She whispered to you and you let out a deep sigh.
“I don’t know if I’m ready to see him yet. He probably still hates me for what I did to him.”
“But that wasn’t your fault.”
“Well, he doesn’t know that. Like you didn’t see the look on his face when I broke up with him. He looked so confused and hurt and I couldn’t tell him that I wasn’t doing it because I wanted to. I was doing it because both sets of parents made me. Have you even seen him yet?”
“Yes and he cut off all of his hair and dyed it blonde…. Again.”
“I remember when I dyed it blonde for him our senior year.”
“And got it all over our bathroom. Good times.”
“But, take a deep breath. He probably misses you more than you know.” Sabrina told you as she tried giving you words of encouragement but all you were doing was trying not to have a panic attack.
“He’s probably moved on and honestly when I think about it, it’s probably for the best. Hopefully it’s someone that his parents approve of.”
“Will you stop talking down about yourself? You were his first love and I’m sorry, that doesn’t go away overnight, it just doesn’t. The two of you were attached at the hip and I know for a fact that the two of you can get back to that and raise Julian together. Also, I want to be a bridesmaid when the time comes.”
“SABRINA!”
“What?!?! I’m just being honest. “
“A lot has to occur for that to even happen.”
“How much do you want to bet he has a ring picked out for you? And I see you’re still wearing the necklace he gave you on your 16th birthday with his initial. So, I rest my case.”
Sabrina knew for a fact that he had a ring for you since the day after you left because she had seen it, he immediately cornered her in a hallway at school to see what happened. At that time, she didn’t know, but all she did know was that your room was empty and that she was missing her big sister.
As Joe had finished helping the kids in his group put on the flags to get ready to start the game, he jogged to the sideline and as soon as he looked to his left, his jaw hit the floor and he started hitting Ja’Marr’s arm.
“OW! What is going on?!”
“That’s her and her sister Sabrina. Fuck that’s her, it’s really her.”
Ja’Marr followed his gaze and saw you talking to who he assumed was your sister and his eyes went wide.
“I… wait a minute…. Y/N is black?!”
“Uh yeah why is that important?” Joe asked him as Tee had come to stand next to them.
“It’s not…. I just wasn’t expecting her to look like THAT. I thought you said Athens only had like 2 black people? Damn, she’s pretty, how did you pull that?”
“Seriously?” Joe asked and Ja’Marr held his hands up in defense.
“I should have known the way you were eating that fried chicken you had been around some seasoning before in your life."
“Wait…. THAT’S HER?!” Tee asked and they both nodded.
Tee took a moment to look at Julian, you, and then Joe and simply nodded his head.
“You the baby daddy, alright.”
“Joe, stop trying to hide behind me, YOU’RE TALLER THAN ME. And did you forget you just dyed your hair? Y/N can probably spot you from a mile away.”
“I don’t know what to do! Should I go and talk to her?”
“For one of your nicknames to be Joe Cool, that is definitely the opposite of what is happening right now. Yes! Go and talk to her when we’re done or when the kids eat lunch.”
“What if she doesn’t want to talk to me?” He asked and they both just looked at him.
“Are you a hormone raging teenage boy again? I highly doubt that she wouldn’t want to talk to you.”
Meanwhile, you looked over to where Joe was standing next to Tee and Ja’Marr, and the butterflies in your stomach instantly hit you like a ton of bricks.
“Sabrina, he’s right there.” You told her as you tugged on her arm.
“And I hear wedding bells.”
“Seriously?! Now is not the time.”
“It’s the perfect time actually.”
“What do I say if he comes up to me?”
“Uh? Hi? Have you suddenly lost all of your brain cells? For you to be an aerospace engineer, I wouldn’t actually be able to tell.”
“That���s different!”
“The kids are about to have lunch anyway so just go up to him then. You actually should have worn less clothing to be honest so he can see what he’s been missing.”
“Uh no, for one there are children around and two, I just came from my new job so that’s a definite no.”
“Changing the subject for a minute, but Julian is actually really good.” Sabrina said as he watched him run down the field for a touchdown.
“Well, look at who his dad is.” You replied as you shrugged.
“Did he always want to play quarterback?”
“Mm hmm, and wouldn’t take no for an answer.”
“What do you think his reaction will be when you tell him?”
“I honestly don’t know. I know my baby like the back of my hand, but that I’m not quite sure about.”
“The baby who is almost taller than you by the way.”
“If he’s only nine now, I can’t imagine how tall he’s going to be when he stops growing.”
“How tall is Joe?”
“6’4.”
“Oh, so we have a little ways to go.”
When the first game had come to an end, Julian spotted you and ran straight into your arms.
“Hi bubs, are you having fun?”
“Yes! Thank you Aunt Sabrina for bringing me!”Julian said as he was still holding onto you but turned towards your sister.
“You’re very welcome, sweetheart.”
“Mom, before we leave do you think Joe will sign my jersey for me?”
“I'm sure he will if you ask him.”
Sabrina got a small smile on her face as she saw Joe walking up behind you.
“Julian, look. There he is, go and ask him.”
As soon as she said that, the butterflies that had been in your stomach the first time you saw them were there once more.
As you turned around, you were met with the sight of your ex boyfriend that you hadn't laid eyes on in person in close to ten years.
“Um, hi Mr. Burrow, could you sign my jersey for me?” He shyly asked as he held up the orange Bengals jersey with Joe's number on the back of it. He made sure to wear the black one, bring the orange one, and the white one was hanging up in his room on the wall while the other white one was hanging up in his closet.
“Of course I can. What's your name?” Joe asked Julian as he handed him the jersey along with a marker.
“Julian and I play quarterback just like you do. You're my favorite player and I've watched you ever since you played at LSU.” He proudly told him and Joe had to laugh to himself.
Julian had literally been watching him since he was 4 turning 5 and had been intrigued ever since.
“Really? Wow, that's a long time ago.”
“I want to play in the NFL one day like you and thank you for signing it.” He confessed as Joe handed him back his signed jersey and squatted down to his level.
“You're welcome and if you practice and work really hard, there is no reason why you can't make that happen. And listening to your mom is also going to help.” Joe told him as he glanced up at you and winked.
Okay so maybe he wasn't mad like you thought he was going to be.
Julian eagerly nodded as Sabrina grabbed his hand and started to pull him in the other direction.
“Now come on and let’s get in line for some food. Your mom has something that she needs to take care of.” Sabrina said and you looked at her confused.
“Wait, what?”
She grabbed Julian’s hand and mouthed to you ‘talk to him’. Once they were both out of earshot, you heard his voice.
“It’s really you.” He quietly said and you simply nodded.
“And it’s really you.” You replied as your necklace caught Joe’s eye.
“You still have it…” He said more as a statement then as a question as he reached up to play with the charm.
“I'm wearing it for two people now. Joseph Lee and Julian Oliver. Only time I take it off is to get it cleaned and then it goes right back on.”
Joe nodded his head and looked in the direction of where Julian was standing next to Sabrina, you followed his gaze and sighed.
“Yes.” You quietly said and you immediately got a guilty look on your face.
“I…”
“There is so much that I have to tell you and cannot do it in a span of five minutes. But yes. You keep looking at him so I answered your question for you because I know what you're thinking.”
“He looks just like me. How old is he?”
“He’ll be ten on December 10th.”
“The same day as ours.” Joe replied and you slowly nodded your head.
“I know we don’t have a lot of time right now, but please understand that I didn’t break up with you because I wanted to, I did it because I was told to and being a scared teenager doesn’t leave you with a lot of options. Just wanted you to know that.”
Joe slowly nodded his head and you couldn't quite read the expression on his face.
“After the kids are done, can we go somewhere and talk? Just us?”
“Of course, I’ll see if my sister can take Julian.”
“And he has no idea does he?” He asked, referring to Julian and you shook your head no.
“So, all this time?”
“You can be mad at me because I would be too, but I moved back because I was done hiding him. He deserves better than that. I wanted for him to know you and for you to know him because that is ultimately who ended up being hurt by all this.”
“He seems like a great kid. And I expect nothing less if he came from you.”
“He is and he is exactly how I imagined that he would be. Just about everything he does reminds me of you.”
Sabrina took Julian without a second thought to give you and Joe time to talk when you had asked her. The two of you decided on one of Joe’s favorite restaurants in the city and made sure that the two of you got a booth in a corner away from everyone else so the goal was no one would bother him.
You were looking over the drink menu, when you could feel Joe staring at you.
“I see some things haven’t changed. Joey, it's not nice to stare.” You told him as you laughed and felt your cheeks heat up and all he did was smile in response.
“Can’t help it if you’re so pretty. Gorgeous now actually. Always been that way.”
“Smooth talker Joe Burrow definitely hasn’t changed.”
It was quiet for a few seconds as both of you were once again scanning the menu when you blurted it out.
“I took a pregnancy test on April 1st because I felt off and before I could tell you, my mom found it.”
“And then what happened?”
“She talked to my dad and in turn both of them talked to your parents...” Joe immediately cut you off.
“Wait, they knew?” He asked and you gave him a slow nod.
“I was told to break up with you and that I had to move in with my grandmother in Texas while your parents paid mine off not to say anything. I only found out about that part last year.”
Joe stayed quiet so you continued.
“So, the day I broke up with you once again, obviously not my choice, a few days later I was on a plane to Texas. My parents said the only way that I would be allowed back in their house was if I got an abortion and I was not allowed to say anything to anyone about it. Of course by now you can see what my answer had been. I haven’t talked to my parents since and I don’t plan to. Looking back on it, I would have done things a little differently.”
“What would you have done differently?”
“Made sure that I told you because that wasn’t fair. You have been thinking for almost ten years that I didn’t want to be with you anymore and that was the furthest thing from the truth and you missed out on knowing your son. We can do a DNA test too to confirm. The last thing that I want anyone to say is that I’m lying.”
When Joe remained quiet, you reached your hand across the table to take his.
“I’m really sorry and I should have told you sooner and…”
“Stop. Y/N just stop.” He told you as he used the other hand to pinch the bridge of his nose.
“I know you’re mad….”
“I am mad, but pissed off is more like it but it’s not towards you.”
“Oh.”
“You had to go through that all by yourself when I could have been there. My son doesn’t even know who I am. I mean technically he does, but not in the capacity that I want him to.”
You slowly nodded as you allowed him to let all of his feelings about the situation be known.
“My parents knew I had a kid and did everything they could in order to keep me away from him.”
“And I missed out on nine years… almost ten.”
It almost looked as if Joe was about to cry, but did his best to compose himself.
“And you named him Julian Oliver, just like we both wanted.”
“I did, but I was told that I couldn’t give him your last name since they took the money or whatever.”
“And here I was thinking that I would never see you again.”
“The feeling is mutual, except on the tv when I watch you play of course. I knew from the beginning how good you were and that you playing in the NFL was bound to happen.” You said as you smiled at the thought of you two sneaking out and going to the park near both of your houses and laying down in the grass to look up at the night sky.
“You did and told me from day one even if I didn’t believe it myself.”
“I know this is a lot to take in but…”
“Just tell me everything, it’s just better to get everything all out in the open once and for all.”
“I mean that's the majority of what happened. I lived in Texas, graduated, went to Harvard. Got a job at NASA…” You started to say as Joe cut you off.
“Wait…. Back up, you actually did it?”
“Yes, you are looking at one of the top aerospace engineers at NASA. I moved back because they opened up a new facility here in Cincinnati.”
“I'm proud of you. I always knew you would end up working for NASA.”
“Thank you and this is the first time I've seen Sabrina too. Because I told my parents I wouldn't get an abortion, I couldn't talk to my siblings anymore. They didn't come to my graduation. I mean, I moved when there was literally a month of school left. I didn't go to prom because if I didn't go with you, it wasn't happening. My grandmother was my only saving grace. I didn't want to leave her and come up here, but she told me that would probably be the best thing for Julian. When my mom or dad would call to talk to her, they never asked about me. That was when my grandmother told me that she cheated on my dad and got pregnant with me and she felt that their relationship would go back to the way it was before it happened if they just got rid of me in a sense. They don't know that I know that. So my mother literally hates me and I don’t know who my actual dad is.”
Joe looked at you in disbelief and every time he opened his mouth to say something, he immediately closed it.
“I'm sorry you had to find out that way and sorry that it even happened at all.”
Before answering, you shrugged your shoulders and waved him off.
“It is what it is.”
“Y/N, no it isn't. That is some heavy shit you've been carrying around for ten years. Have you talked to anyone about that?”
“No and I don't want to. What good will it do?”
“You know better. Priorities can include Julian, but also includes yourself.”
“I guess, but not now. It's just… it's hard trying to wrap your mind around the fact that just about everyone in your life hates you and you were essentially a mistake.”
“You've always talked down on yourself and I see some things never change.”
“Sabrina said the same thing.”
“So that obviously means that we're telling the truth. You have always been the smartest and prettiest one in the room and it's still true now.”
“Even if I am, I'll probably never see it that way.”
After the two of you spent at least 2 more hours with each other, you exchanged numbers and it would be decided when and how the two of you would tell Julian.
The thought was exciting, but Joe was also dreading it. What if Julian despised him for not being there for him as well as you?
But for now, the day ended with a lot for Joe to think about.
Seeing you for the first time in ten years
Oh and the biggest one with you and him sharing a child that you were essentially bribed and threatened in a way to stay quiet about.
Knowing that his parents knew the entire time made Joe sick to his stomach.
He also had a feeling that both Ja’Marr and Tee would have their phones in their hands waiting for an update on what had happened. Before he could send the message that he had just typed, Tee beat him to it.
Tee- 👀👀👀
Uno- Spill the damn tea and stop leaving us in suspense
Joe- He's mine
Tee- I KNEW IT
Uno- Soooo I need details on why you didn't know about this….
Joe- My parents paid hers off not to tell me and made her move to Texas to live with her grandmother. And apparently she would only be allowed to move back if she got an abortion and of course as we can all see, she didn’t
Tee- YOUR PARENTS KNEW!?
Uno- This is some Tyler Perry movie shit 😫
Joe- They knew and pissed off doesn't even begin to describe how I'm feeling right now. I missed out on damn near ten years of my son's life. He has no idea who I am
Tee- Technically he does know who you are
Uno- But still that shit is CRAZY. So are the two of you going to tell Julian?
Joe- Yeah, but I'm getting a DNA test first because Y/N won't take no for an answer and I get it. I know he's mine and she does too obviously but that way no one will be able to say anything about it. We have to decide when we're going to tell him. I don't know how he's going to take it.
Uno- Whatever you need from us, we got you
Tee- Ditto
Joe- Appreciate it. First thing I need to do is confront my parents and ask them why they kept this from me
About a week or so passed and Joe had been ignoring the calls from his parents. He would talk to them a few times a week, but ever since he found out they knew about Julian, he really didn't know what to say to them.
However, he did promise to have Sunday dinner with them and he planned on confronting them and getting this out in the open once and for all.
There Joe was sitting at the dinner table with his parents and pushing his food around on his plate. Both Jimmy and Robin noticed and they exchanged a glance with one another before Jimmy asked if he was okay.
“Joe, you okay over there? It's one of your favorite meals and you've barely even touched it.”
“You know what, dad? No, I'm not okay.” He replied as he set his fork down and looked at him.
“Why? Did something happen?” Robin asked and he was doing his best in order not to roll his eyes.
“Something did happen and I don’t like being lied to.”
“Who lied about something?”
“Apparently the two people who have the title of being my parents tried to hide the fact that I have a child who is damn near ten years old. So, no one was going to say anything?”
Joe looked at both his parents in anticipation as the question he asked them lingered in the air.
When both of them were quiet, he spoke up again.
“Oh, so no one has anything to say?”
“Joseph, we did it to protect you as well as your future.” Jimmy finally spoke up as Robin remained quiet.
“Protect me from what exactly? Because that literally makes no fucking sense and you know it.”
“I don't care how old you are, watch your mouth when you talk to us.” Robin said as she crossed her arms and finally looked at him.
“I can't believe you two, but especially you. When Y/N broke up with me which I learned was your doing all along I came and confided in you not knowing what you had actually done. And let me ask, were you ever going to say anything?”
“I….”
“Never mind because whatever excuse you're about to pull out of your ass isn't worth it.”
“JOSEPH LEE BURROW!”
“NO, I GET TO BE PISSED OFF NOT YOU TWO. I GOT TO MISS OUT ON THE FIRST NINE YEARS OF MY SON'S LIFE BECAUSE YOU TWO PAID HER PARENTS NOT TO SAY ANYTHING ABOUT IT AND MADE HER DISAPPEAR FROM MY LIFE. I PLANNED ON MARRYING HER AND I WOULD HAVE DONE IT IF SHE HAD GOTTEN PREGNANT OR NOT.” Joe had been seeing red from the moment he stepped into his parents house and did not plan on backing down.
“We get you're upset, but let's calm down so we can talk.”
“You should have talked to me almost ten years ago. For now, I'm done. But answer this, forget about me for a minute. How could you do that to your own grandchild?”
“We never wanted to hurt you.”
“Hmm, funny. Because the people who did end up getting hurt were me, Y/N, and Julian. That's his name in case either of you wanted to know.”
“I saw Y/N with him about a month ago when I went to the grocery store.” Robin quietly said and Joe just shook his head at her.
“And you didn't say anything!?”
“When I saw him…. He is literally you up and down. There's no denying it. I know that us saying sorry is not going to cut it but….”
“You're right, it's not. Nothing you say is going to cut it or make me forgive you two for what you did. Y/N had NO ONE. She went through that by herself. Her parents shipped her off to Texas because she refused to get an abortion. I don't care what I would have had to do, she meant everything to me and I would have done anything to make sure that they were both okay. Now when we finally do tell him, he's going to wonder why I wasn't there.” Joe stated as he pushed his chair away from the table and stood up.
“Joseph…”
“I'm done. I don't want to talk to either of you right now.”
Once Joe was settled in his car, he immediately called you on facetime so that he would have you to keep him company on the long drive home that he had. When he pulled out of his parents driveway, you finally answered.
When Joe's face came into view, you could tell that he was upset and that something had happened.
“Joey? Is everything okay? What's going on?” You asked as you got up to head into your bedroom to be able to talk to him without Julian overhearing.
“I just left my parents house.”
“Okay? What is that look on your face for?”
“I asked them why they lied to me for almost ten years and of course no one had a good answer as to why they did it.” Joe breathed out as he pulled onto the highway.
“Oh and my mom mentioned seeing you about a month ago and failed to tell me anything. They're trying to apologize now but for what? Why even do it at this point? You knew what you were doing from the beginning.”
“I don't want to come in between you and your parents. I know how close you are with them.”
“It doesn't even matter. What's right is right and what's wrong is wrong and in this case they're dead wrong. And they also knew how I felt about you and how important you are to me.”
“Joey… hear me out for a second.”
“I'm listening.”
“Your feelings are completely valid and I'm not downplaying how you feel at all. But instead of focusing on being pissed at them, focus on finally being able to be a part of Julian’s life. He deserves you and you deserve him. I need you to be in the right and the best headspace. Do not come around him with that hanging over your head.”
“I… get it. I'm just… I can't believe that they would do that to me.”
“I know, but good news…”
“What is it?”
“DNA results are back and it's confirmed that you're my baby daddy even though we already knew.” You told him and saw a small smile form on his face.
“Now we just have to decide when we're going to tell him.” Joe told you as he sighed.
“Who knows? It might actually go better than we think it will.” Deep down you were not only trying to convince Joe, but convince yourself.
“But what if it doesn't?”
“Then we'll figure out a plan if it comes down to it. Do you want to wait until after training camp?”
“I was thinking the same thing. And maybe you two can come to the first home game of the season? And then we can go from there.” Joe's heart started to beat faster and he wasn't quite sure if it was nervousness or excitement.
“I like that idea.”
As promised, Joe made sure the two of you had tickets to the first home game of the season and the two of you were going to be directly behind the Bengals bench. Joe wanted you to be in his suite, but you told him that Julian had never been to an NFL game and needed to get the full experience.
Joe had sent you a text earlier saying that he couldn't wait to see the both of you and that the two of you should tell Julian after the game.
There Julian was next to you sitting there in awe and munching on his hot dog as he anxiously waited for the game to start. He dragged you as soon as the gates opened so he wouldn't miss anything. That was when you spotted Joe and a few other players come out the tunnel to come and warm up.
“Julian, look up.” You told him and his eyes immediately went to Joe.
“Mom! He's right there and there's Ja’Marr, Tee, and Andrei.”
“I see and look who's walking over here?” You replied as Joe began walking towards the two of you.
“I don't have anything for him to sign!”
“He signed your jersey already!”
“Oh, right. I forgot.” Julian said as he slumped down in his chair and you couldn't help but to laugh.
“Hey Julian.”
“You remember my name?” He asked as his eyes went wide and Joe nodded his head as Julian stood up to stand against the railing.
“Of course I do. And your mom told me that this is your first NFL game in person.” He said as he turned to look at you and wink, making a smile form on your face.
“It is. I usually just watch it at home with my mom.”
“I hope I'm able to see you a lot more this season.”
“Well, you have to talk to my mom, she's the boss.” Julian said and you stifled a laugh.
“I definitely think that I'm going to be able to convince her.”
Julian smiled at Joe as he went back to eating his hot dog and Joe motioned for you to come closer to him.
“Hmm, I knew you would look good in my jersey, but I didn’t expect you to look this good.”
“I figured that you would like it.”
“That’s putting it lightly. So we still on for later?”
“Yeah, I'm cooking so just come by when you're done here and we can go from there. Since it's going to be after the game, I plan on making you a cheat meal. I already texted you the address.”
“I most definitely have missed your cooking so no complaints here.”
“Well ten years have passed and I've gotten a lot better.”
“That isn't all that's gotten a lot better.” Joe told you as he looked you up and down and you could feel your cheeks heat up.
“Joey, go finish warming up and behave yourself.”
“I am behaving! Just calling it like I see it.”
“I beg to differ.”
Even though the Bengals didn't come away with a win, Julian was still excited nonetheless to be able to go in person. You were now standing in front of the stove while Julian was sitting at the kitchen table and playing on his iPad that you had recently gotten him when the doorbell rang and you knew it was Joe since you could see him on the security camera.
“Bubs, can you go see who's at the door for me?”
“Yes, mom.”
Julian basically sprinted towards the door and when he opened it, his mouth hit the floor.
“Hey Julian, your mom invited me for dinner.”
“I… Uh…” He started to stutter and you suddenly appeared next to him.
“Julian, don't leave our guest waiting outside. Invite him in already.” You said as you smiled at him and he immediately moved to the side so that he could come in.
He had a bouquet of flowers in his hands and quickly gave it to you while also hugging you.
If it was left up to you, you would have stayed in that hug forever.
“Pink roses still your favorite?” He asked and you quickly nodded.
“Yes, still my favorite, but now peonies are high up on my list too.”
“I'll keep that in mind for next time. It smells good in here, what are you making?” He asked as he was now following your lead into the kitchen.
“Tacos. Always a good cheat meal and still one of your favorites?”
“Still one of my favorites.”
Watching both Julian and Joe stuff their faces with tacos was comical. It was the fact that they both fixed their tacos the exact same way and you noticed right away. Being that you were so nervous about how Julian was going to react, you didn't have much of an appetite. When Joe finished, he looked up and made eye contact with you as you then took a deep sigh.
It was now or never so let's get this over with.
“Julian, I have something that I need to tell you.”
“Okay, what is it? Are we still going to the aquarium?”
“Yes, we're still going and it's something else. Something that you have been steadily asking me about for a while.”
“A puppy?!”
“Uh no. Not exactly. Julian, Joe is your dad.” You finally said and he looked confused as he glanced back and forth between the both of you.
“Hold on, I don't get it.”
“It’s taken….” You started to say and he immediately cut you off.
“You knew this the entire time and kept him from me?” Julian asked and you knew that shit had officially hit the fan.
“It wasn't that simple, Julian.” Joe immediately spoke up as he looked at him.
“How is it not? I thought you didn't want me but you've been here the entire time.”
“The difference was that I didn't know about you, it wasn’t the fact that I didn’t want you.”
“Julian, just listen for a minute.” You said but he made a face at you.
“Why should I? What else are you lying to me about?”
“I…”
Without another word, Julian pushed himself away from the table and ran upstairs to his room leaving both you and Joe at the table looking at one another.
“Deep down I knew this was going to happen.” You quietly said as you started to play with the ends of your braids.
“I'll go and talk to him, it'll be fine.” Joe told you as he grabbed your hand and gave it a small squeeze before standing up and going to talk to Julian.
Joe took the steps two at a time and there was no denying which room was his, seeing as his walls were covered in any and everything Bengals related.
“Julian, can I come in?” Joe asked him as he stood in the hallway in front of his bedroom door.
He nodded as he angrily wiped tears away from his face.
Joe walked in and sat down next to him and sighed.
“I know you're upset, but don't take it out on your mom.”
“But she lied to me.”
“She didn't necessarily lie, she was just trying to protect you. None of this has been easy for her. And I can imagine that it hasn't been easy for you either.” Joe explained to him and Julian quickly nodded letting him know that he agreed.
“She has done an amazing job taking care of you and I'm very thankful to her for it. But now you also have me. If I would have known from the beginning, things would have been a lot different. But we can't do anything about the past. We just have to focus on the future and move forward. Do you agree?”
“Yes.”
“Good now can I get a hug and you go back downstairs and apologize to your mom? I don't think what you said made her feel all that good. And we don't want to hurt her feelings, right? Because you don't like when people hurt your feelings right?”
“No, I don't like it.”
“Now come on so we can get some of the cake your mom made.”
“Okay.” Julian said as he quickly hugged Joe's side and nodded his head.
“I'm glad you're my dad and not Patrick Mahomes. I don't like the Chiefs and I wouldn't be able to fake it either.” Julian added and Joe had to stifle a laugh.
About a month and a half went by and Joe would spend as much time as he could with Julian on his off days seeing as though it was the middle of the season.
It was almost as if no time had passed and Joe quickly fell into the role of being a father. He made sure to call Julian every night before he went to sleep and also used that opportunity to talk to you. Your current thought process was not being sure if rekindling the relationship between the two of you was in the cards. Truth be told, that would definitely be the icing on the cake, but you weren't exactly quite sure what Joe wanted and he didn't mention it to you either. But the most important thing was him having a relationship with Julian.
And for now, you were content with that.
You were currently working from home and it was the early afternoon when your phone started ringing. Glancing down, you saw it was Joe and a wave of butterflies had hit your stomach and quickly answered.
“Yes, Joseph?
“Don't do that. Am I in trouble? You only did that when I was in trouble.” He asked and you laughed as you shook your head.
“Hmm, depends. Have you done something that would warrant you to be in trouble?’
“I don't think so, so let's go with that.”
“Everything okay?” You asked as you plugged in your laptop to prevent it from dying.
“Yeah, it's fine….” Joe started to say and then trailed off and he would always do this if he knew he was about to say or do something that you weren't completely on board with.
“I can still read you like a book. Spit it out.”
“Okay, just…. Keep an open mind with what I'm about to ask.”
“Okay, go ahead. I'm listening.”
“I want Julian to meet my parents.”
It was quiet for a few seconds and even though he couldn't see you, you were shaking your head.
“No.”
“Y/N, just hear me out. Julian has literally only been around you and your grandmother since he was born, right? For the most part?”
“And that wasn't my choice. It was decided for me.”
“He should have the opportunity to know who his grandparents are.”
“The grandparents who wanted NOTHING to do with him? Do I have that right?”
“I know, but they apologized multiple times for what they did. They know how I feel about it. I literally didn't talk to them for almost a month.”
“So, that makes it okay?”
“No, not at all and I told them that. But they are making an effort because they genuinely want to get to know him.”
“They didn't even allow me to give him the Burrow last name and all of a sudden they want to get to know him? Joey, let's be serious for a second. They probably would have NEVER told you that he even existed if it wasn't for me.”
“Y/N, I know this may be difficult for you but we can't change what happened. All we can do is move forward.”
“Your mother fucking HATES me and she always has.”
“No she doesn't! Neither of my parents hate you.”
“He's just getting to know you, give him some time to adjust.”
“Well we wouldn't be going through this if you would have told me.” Joe shot back at you and immediately regretted it once the words left his mouth.
“We wouldn't be going through this if it wasn't for YOUR MOTHER WHO FUCKING HATES ME like I said before!”
“Where did you even get that from?”
“Joseph, don't be dumb. So I'm going to open the door for her also to hate my child that she wanted no connection to from the beginning? No fucking thank you. If I don't talk to my parents what makes you think I want to be around yours when they are just as guilty? And I feel like you're downplaying what they did to me! Did to us! How can you not see that?” You asked as you felt a few tears slip out.
You should have known that it would eventually come down to this. You just didn't think it would be so soon.
As in Joe's parents wanting to be in Julian's life too.
“I'm not trying to make you upset. I just…”
“Too late because you already have. I have work to do, so bye.”
Without another word, you hung up the phone and threw it onto the couch behind you while you were doing your best not to cry even harder.
After you had hung up the phone on him, Joe was at a loss. He frustratedly ran a hand through his hair before sighing and attempting to call you back.
When you didn't answer, he came up with what he thought was the perfect idea to get you to talk to him.
A little over twenty four hours later, your doorbell rang and you checked the camera to see that it was Joe and rolled your eyes.
A little over twenty four hours later, your doorbell rang and you checked the camera to see that it was Joe and rolled your eyes. 
“Go away, Joseph.”
“Y/N, let me in so we can talk.”
“No.”
“We aren't 17 anymore stop giving me the silent treatment. I know how to bribe you.” He told you as he held up the pizza which you assumed was pepperoni in the camera.
"You're right we're not 17. Which means, I don't give in to your bribes anymore. So there's that.”
"Stop acting like you don't want this pizza and open the door. I also threw in a new telescope for good measure.”
“Wait, you got me a telescope?” You asked as you slowly cracked open the door and peeked your head out.
“You aren't getting it unless you let me in.”
“And what kind of pizza is that?” You asked as you were pointing. You already had a feeling that you knew what it was, but you needed confirmation.
“Your favorite.”
“What's my favorite?”
“What is this? 20 questions? Come on Y/N, let me in already.”
“Then tell me what's in the box!”
“Pepperoni and I got extra ranch on the side now open.the.door.”
“Hmph, fine. But hand over the pizza first.”
“No, not a chance. You're going to take it and slam the door shut. I still know you like the back of my hand.”
You sighed and finally rolled your eyes as you fully opened the door so he could step inside.
Once Joe was fully inside the house, he made his way into the kitchen and set the pizza on the table and went on the hunt to look for plates not knowing if he should take out two or three.
“Where’s Julian?”
“With my sister, so l'm by myself.” You answered as he then took down two plates and brought them over to the table. Opening the box, he slid two pieces on one of them and slid it over to you while also setting the ranch down in front of you.
“Thanks.”
“No problem.”
The two of you were eating in silence when Joe finally broke it.
“You know that I never liked fighting with you.”
“I know.” You quietly answered as you picked a piece of pepperoni off your second slice of pizza and popped it in your mouth.
“So can we come up with some type of compromise?”
Taking a deep breath, you nodded your head before pushing your plate into the center of the table and giving him your undivided attention.
“I know what they did to us and Julian wasn't fair and I'm not trying to downplay it at all. When I finally did answer the phone and talk to them, I explained how I felt and said that they betrayed my trust which I never thought was going to happen since they're my parents. Your hesitation is valid because mine was too when they had first asked. But the more I think about it, he does need to know who his family is.”
“I get that. It's just…. The main thing in the back of my mind is him getting hurt on the same level that we did.”
“They know that if they did that, that they would never see him again and I made that very clear. Because at first when they asked, I had the same reaction as you did and I said no.”
“Okay, I will do it for Julian and I promise to play nice. When did you want him to meet them?”
“You busy Sunday? All of you can be in my suite at the stadium for the game.”
“I’m not and that sounds like a plan. The last thing I said to your mom when I saw her in Athens was ‘good luck begging your son for forgiveness’ and I also told her something along the lines of her not liking me so this should be interesting.”
“You want me to have security at the stadium on standby?” Joe jokingly asked and you smiled at him while shaking your head.
“No need. Julian is my main priority and that will always be the case. As long as he’s happy and taken care of, I’m more than content with that.”
“That reminds me. It’s going to get cold soon so I wanted to take him shopping for some winter clothes. Has he ever even seen snow before?”
“He’d like that and no he actually hasn’t and I have a feeling that he is not going to like it, but he may surprise me so let’s see.”
“I can do it on my next off day. I’ll pick him up from school so you don’t have to worry about doing it.”
You nodded your head as you were deep in thought and Joe grabbed your hand breaking you out of your trance.
“What’s wrong?”
“I just stop to think sometimes on how our lives might have been different if you had known from the beginning.” You quietly answered as Joe nodded his head.
“I do the same thing. I’m just happy that you finally decided that enough was enough and told me.”
“Honestly, I didn’t know how you were going to take it and I was scared out of my mind. I also thought you still hated me after I broke up with you out of nowhere.”
“I could never hate you, no matter what the circumstances had been. And you didn’t know how I was going to take it? He literally looks like the perfect mix of both of us. I couldn’t deny him even if I wanted to. It’s funny that Ja’Marr and Tee actually noticed first. When they told me his name and I saw you, I started connecting the dots.”
“He’s starting to look like you more and more everyday.”
“I have another question for you and it’s okay if you don’t want to answer it.”
“Go ahead.”
“Would you ever talk to your parents again? Or at least try to find out who your actual dad is?”
“It’s not on the top of my priority list and they knew where I was the entire time. If they really honestly did care about me, none of this would have even happened. Sabrina doesn’t even really talk to them and as for my other siblings, I have no idea. Who knows what lies they told them about me. I honestly think that the only people who care about me are you, Julian, and Sabrina. And I’ve always felt like that.”
“And you know I’ll never stop caring about you.” Joe told you as he kissed the back of your hand before massaging it in small circles.
“I know.” You said with a shy smile.
“But enough about that, it’s finally dark outside and I’ll get the telescope out of my car since you did hold up your end of the deal with letting me in the house and it’s evident that my bribes do still work.”
“Burrow, don’t start.” You said as you pointed to him as he stood up from the kitchen table. He held his hands up in defense before smiling at you.
“Just calling it like I see it.”
“Joey! That piece doesn’t go there, it goes over here!”
“That’s not what the picture says!”
“Are you looking at the picture or reading the actual directions?”
“Umm, kinda both.”
“Hand it over to the actual aerospace engineer please.” Joe did as he was told but not before he rolled his eyes and pinched your cheek making you laugh.
“I am so fucking proud of you for making it happen. I always knew that you were going to do it.”
“Thank you, Joey. I can give you credit for telling me to go for it and not sell myself short. Julian was also my motivation. I had to be able to make enough money to take care of both of us.” You told him.
“And now you don't have to worry about doing it all by yourself anymore.”
Once you finished putting the telescope together, the two of you spent some time looking through it until you grabbed one of your fluffy blankets to lay on the deck in your backyard allowing the two of you to lay on it.
It was an usually warm night in October and you figured that you better enjoy it before the winter air kicked in. The two of you were simply gazing up at the night sky which you both did often when you were younger when Joe wrapped his arms around you and you moved to lay your head on his chest.
“I can’t even tell you how much I’ve missed this.” He whispered in your ear as you nodded in agreement.
“Me too.”
“I figured that you would have been married by now and forgot all about me.”
“How could I forget about you when people were saying your name everywhere I turned? And besides, I kept up with what you were doing. I was very excited when you entered the transfer portal and went to LSU. Being a backup quarterback didn’t fit you very well since I knew how amazing you were. And I honestly thought you would have been married by now.”
“You never let me forget it either. And I wasn’t marrying anyone who would be in your rightful place. Only person that I was ever going to make my wife was you. What I told you when we were seventeen hasn’t changed.”
“Just patiently waiting for you to win MVP and I know that it’s coming. And I know Julian would want nothing more than for all of us to be under one roof.”
“I want this with you. We get to do it right this time and no one can tell us no.”
Nodding your head in agreement, Joe turned your head to face him as he leaned over to kiss you. You eagerly kissed him back as both of your hands were exploring each other’s bodies. As Joe took the bottom of your shirt in his hands, he broke the kiss and searched your eyes for permission before he proceeded. When you nodded your head, your shirt was then peeled off of your body and thrown to the side as he comfortably moved you to the side so that he could hover above you.
At this moment, you were thankful for your fenced in backyard and the fact that your house wasn’t very close to anyone else’s. So the likelihood of the two of you getting caught was slim to none.
The next piece of clothing to come off of your body was your bra as Joe started to place several feather-like kisses all over starting from your neck as he worked his way down. His tongue lightly grazed one of your nipples before taking it fully in his mouth and slowly beginning to suck on it making a quiet moan slip from your mouth. He soon switched sides before you tugged on his shirt telling him to take it off. Once he did, he added it to your pile of clothes to the left of you before moving downward and slipping off your leggings that you were currently wearing with nothing underneath. 
He quickly spread your legs and settled himself in between them as his mouth finally made contact with your core.
Joe continued to pleasure you as he heard your soft whimpers and inserted one of his fingers as he started pumping it in and out of you. Your hands quickly made a way into his hair as you tried to pull him as close as possible to you.
“Shiiit.” You quietly said as Joe wasted no time adding another finger while his focus was now solely on your clit.
“Mm, Joey.”
“You gonna cum for me, baby?” Joe asked as his mouth left your clit for a quick second before going right back to it.
Not being able to utter another word because of how much pleasure you were in, you simply nodded your head. 
You didn’t know how much time had passed, but before you could tell Joe that you were close, You quickly squirted all over his face, However, he didn’t move a muscle as he tightly held onto your legs and still gave you as much pleasure as possible.
“Baby… mmm… Joey, I can’t….” You told him as you were doing your best to attempt to move away from him so you could somewhat recover from the constant feeling of you hitting your peak over and over again, but he obviously wasn’t letting that happen.
Being as bold as he was, he held eye contact with you the entire time, making you shake your head at him. When he finally came up for air, he placed several kisses all along your thighs before moving back up your body to place a kiss on your lips, which you gladly accepted and gave him several more.
“You are such an ass.” You whispered against his lips and all he did was laugh at you. 
“Now, is that how we treat someone who just made you cum not once, but multiple times?”
“Hmm, yes because I know that you aren’t going to do anything else about it, but make me cum more and make me beg for mercy like you just did.”
“Good girl.”
“I see not much has changed.”
“But I see something on you has.” He replied as he began to play with your nipple piercings before leaning down and sucking on them.
“I figured that you would like that.”
“But I know that I’m going to love being inside you more. You ready for me?” He asked as he slipped another finger back into you. He took it back out and eagerly began sucking on it as he peered down at you.
Nodding your head, Joe slipped off his sweatpants along with his boxers and lined himself with your entrance.
“I know that you don’t have a lot of neighbors, but we still need to be quiet. Think you can do that for me, baby girl?”
“Yes.”
“You promise not to make a sound?” Joe asked you as he inserted himself in you at the same time making you gasp.
“Hmm, that wasn’t quiet. Don’t let it happen again.” He whispered in your ear as he began pounding into you.
Your arms had now wrapped around his neck as his head was resting on your shoulder. It was taking everything in you not to make a sound and you knew that as hard as you were biting down on your lip that blood had probably trickled out of it. 
A small moan slipped out and Joe immediately stopped his movements and picked his head up to look at you.
“I thought I said not a sound, baby girl? And you were doing so well.” He told you as he pulled all the way out before slamming his hips all the way back in making you gasp.
Joe reached down to sloppily kiss you as he continued to move in and out of you with you trying not to make a sound. Your hands went back around his neck as he movements became sloppier indicating that he was close.
“Joey…. I’m close.”
“Hold it until I tell you to.”
“But…” You quickly protested, but all Joe did was shake his head, indicating that he didn’t want to hear it and that you had better listen to him.
It was taking everything in you to not let go right then and there as he was still going, but when you finally heard his voice, you wasted no time.
“Now you can.” He whispered against your lips as both of you came at the same time. Joe made sure not to finish inside you and his cum was covering the lower half of your stomach before you sat up and caught him off guard with you taking him in your mouth.
“Oh shit, babe.”
He made sure to move your hair out of the way as you continued to pleasure him as you also kept eye contact with him the entire time. The use of your hands also helped when your jaw was quickly becoming tired.
It didn’t take long for you to taste his cum at the back of your throat once he released in your mouth and milked him until the very last drop. Once you were finished, you laid back down on the blanket as Joe laid down next to you before pulling you on top of him and kissing your forehead. 
“I’ll give you ten minutes and I think we need to go inside for the second round because I know for a fact that I’m going to have you screaming.” Joe told you as he smirked and leaned over to kiss you.
It was now Sunday and as promised, it was the day that Julian was going to meet his grandparents. You were nervous to say the least, but at this point in time, it is what it is. You and Joe both compromised and you were going to uphold your end of the deal.
Julian actually didn't know that he would be meeting them. All he knew was that he was going to get a chance to sit up in his dad's suite and watch the game.
You and Julian would be wearing matching jerseys, along with jeans and your pandas to top it off.
As you were laying out your clothes to wear later, you got a facetime call from Joe and quickly answered.
“Good morning, Joey.”
“Good morning, my love. You ready for later?” Joe asked as you could see him moving around in his bedroom.
“I should be the one asking you that.” You replied as you sat down on your bed next to your outfit.
“I'm good. About to leave the house in a few. Excited to see you as always. And my baby boy of course.”
“And your baby boy is excited to see you play as always. Wouldn’t stop talking about it from the time that I told him.” 
“Where is he? I want to talk to him before I leave.”
“Hold on. Julian! Come here for a second.”
“Coming mom!”
Once he came into your room, he was all smiles as he hugged you before sitting next to you on your bed.
“Someone wants to talk to you.”
“Is it dad!?” He excitedly asked as you handed him your phone.
“See for yourself.”
Once Julian saw his father on the screen staring back at him, his smile got even wider if that was possible.
“Dad!”
“Hey King Julian, I'm excited to see you later.”
“Me too! Me and mom are wearing the white jerseys with our pandas so we can match you!”
“Definitely take a picture once you two get dressed and send it to me. And Julian?”
“Yes?”
“You have to promise me to be on your best behavior today. I know you usually are, but I just needed to remind you. I have some special people coming to the game to meet you.” Joe told him and Julian nodded in agreement.
“I will, I promise.”
“And what's my one other rule?”
“Besides being on my best behavior? Listening and protecting mom.”
“Perfect. I'll see you later, little man.”
“Oh! Can we get ice cream after the game?”
“Yes, as long as mom approves.” Joe answered and Julian immediately turned to you and gave you puppy dog eyes.
“I… how can I say no to a face like that? Of course we can.”
“I want rocky road or no…. Maybe bubble gum…”
“Well there's no rush, you have a few more hours to decide.” Joe replied as you noticed that he was now outside walking to his car.
“Okay Julian, let dad go to work and you need to go downstairs and finish your breakfast.”
“But mom, I want a chili cheese dog.”
“I… Not for breakfast you aren't! I will get you one later, promise.”
“But…”
“Julian, what did your mother say?” Joe asked him as he was now driving.
“To wait until later.”
“So we need to be patient, right?”
“Yes. I'll go finish my food.” Julian said with a slight attitude which Joe quickly caught onto and shut down.
“Lose the attitude this instant or we aren't getting ice cream. Didn't we just have an entire discussion about you listening to your mom?”
He let out a deep sigh before nodding his head in agreement.
“Go ahead and do what she told you to do.”
“Okay.”
Julian handed you back your phone before heading back downstairs and you were once again left with Joe.
“He gets his attitude from you.” You said without hesitation and Joe immediately snorted.
“That is one thing that I can actually agree with. Even though your attitude is just as bad.”
“I… it is not!”
“I will never tell you a lie, babe.”
“I'm ignoring you. But good luck today and as always either way it goes, I'm still proud of you.” You told him and he gave you a small smile in return.
“So if I win, victory kisses and if we lose sympathy kisses?”
Once you had arrived at the stadium with Julian and had gotten settled in Joe's suite, the two of you were there by yourselves for about twenty minutes before his parents made their presence known.
“Hi, Y/N.” Joe's dad was the first to speak and you gave him a small smile. Robin was next to him, but you couldn’t quite read her facial expression.
“Hi, Julian, these are the special and important people that your dad wanted you to meet.” You told him and he turned around in his seat to smile at the both of them.
“This is your grandma and grandpa. Your dad's parents.”
“Wait, dad has parents?”
“Everyone has parents, silly!” You explained to him as both Jim and Robin made themselves comfortable.
Robin finally spoke and pulled you to the side to be able to talk to you.
“Y/N, can we talk?” She asked and you looked to see that Jim was explaining something that was happening in the game to Julian and nodded your head.
“Sure.”
Once the two of you were outside the suite in the hallway, she took a deep breath before saying anything.
“I… first off thank you for agreeing for us to meet and get to know Julian. Because Joe’s original answer was no and I can imagine that yours was the same thing.”
“You’re welcome.”
“I want us to be able to put all of this behind us and move forward. Looking back on what I did, it wasn’t right in the slightest despite me wanting to protect my son. You have always been there for him and I knew that you cared about him. I knew once he knew that you were back in Ohio that it would be the same thing. I don’t think telling you sorry is enough and it will probably never be enough. Joe didn’t even talk to us for like a month and a half when he confronted us about it. Even after all this time, when Joe talks about you he lights up. And he does it even more now that he knows about Julian. I hope that you can forgive us for what we did. I know that it won’t happen overnight and that it will take time, but there is no rush. We want to be a part of Julian’s life and a part of yours.”
Clearly taken aback from what Robin had just confessed to you, all you could do at the moment was nod your head.
“Thank you for telling me that. I always thought you hated me when we were in high school so that was your entire reasoning behind doing what you did. But Joe swears up and down that you don’t.”
“No, I didn’t hate you and I still don’t. All I wanted to do was protect his future and was willing to go to extreme measures to do so. I know we hurt the both of you tremendously. I still think about the night Joe came to me in tears because you had broken up with him because we had told you to.”
“I still remember the look on his face, but he told me that he doesn’t hold it against me and knew for a fact that something wasn’t right about the whole thing. One day we were planning our future with each other and the next, I was breaking up with him.”
“That was definitely a dark time for him and that didn’t help when it spilled over to him going to Ohio State as a backup quarterback.”
“I can imagine.”
“But I just wanted to pull you to the side to talk to you. Now let’s go back in and enjoy the game.” She told you as she leaned in to hug you which you quickly returned.
Once you took your rightful spot next to Julian, he turned to you and asked a question.
“Where are your parents, mom?”
“Not really all that important right now, babe.” You replied and you were actually dreading the day that he found out the entire truth as to why he only had you in his life for so long and no one else.
As the game was quickly underway, the Bengals won the toss, but deferred it to get the ball at the start of the second half. Jim and Robin were both making conversation with Julian and you had to smile at how excited he was to meet them despite your protests. But what you weren't expecting was your actual parents to walk through the door.
“Hi everyone!” 
Hearing her voice was like nails on a chalkboard and your flight or fight instincts immediately kicked in. You turned around to see both of your parents staring back at you and wasted no time questioning them.
“Why the hell are either of you here?”
“Now, Y/N is that any way to talk to your parents?” The person who calls himself your father asked.
“You aren’t even my real father, so you can pipe the fuck down.”
“OKAY! WHOA! Y/N, we just reached out to them to see if they wanted to come and watch the game with us since we knew that you were bringing Julian with you.” Jim stepped in to say as he put a hand on your shoulder. Meanwhile, Julian was looking at you confused.
“No. They need to leave immediately.”
“Y/N, why are you so upset? We just wanted to meet our grandson too.” Your mother softly said, making you instantly roll your eyes.
“Neither of you have talked to me since I was seventeen when I first got pregnant with him so what in the world makes you think that you have a right to just show up out of nowhere and talk to him? I don’t even want to have anything to do with either of you and I know for a FACT, my son is not going to be around you either.”
“That was a difficult time for all of us.”
“Difficult for who? You made me break up with my boyfriend at the damn near end of my senior year when I had a MONTH LEFT and move all the way across the country to live with my grandmother. Neither of you came to my graduation or checked up on me to see how I was doing and every time you called to talk to her, she would ask if you wanted to talk to me and the answer was always no. I was literally in the hospital in labor BY MYSELF because grandma was out of town on a business trip. A FUCKING NURSE HELD MY HAND INSTEAD OF IT BEING MY BOYFRIEND OR MY MOTHER. DON’T YOU DARE TALK TO ME ABOUT IT BEING A DIFFICULT TIME FOR YOU.”
“Okay, Y/N, baby girl I get that you’re upset…”
“No, you don’t know ANYTHING and you need to….. Where’s Julian?” You asked no one in particular and everyone looked around the room dumbfounded and confused just as you were.
“He was just sitting right there. I… maybe the bathroom?”
“He never leaves without telling me because he knows better. SHIT.”
Meanwhile, Julian was wandering the hallways of the stadium by himself when all of a sudden he was spotted by Mama Tee who he met when he also met Ja’Marr and Tee after one of the Bengals home games. She spotted him too and immediately went up to him and was looking around for you.
“Julian? What are you doing out here by yourself? Where’s your mom? You look upset?”
“We were in the suite and I met my dad’s parents, but my mom’s parents also came and she got really upset. They started arguing and I wanted to leave. I really want my dad right now.” He told her as tears threatened to fall from his eyes. 
“I… okay. Well you can’t go to him right this second since he’s playing in the game, but I need to get you back to your mom because she is probably losing her mind. Julian, baby, you can’t walk away and not tell anyone.” She told him as she grabbed his hand and was leading him back towards the suite. 
“Dad told me to always protect my mom, but I also know not to interrupt adults when they’re talking so I just left. I don’t want them here and I’ve never seen her like that. I don’t want to be around anyone who has hurt my mom.”
“Okay, how about this? Let’s dial her number so I can tell her that you’re okay and we can go from there.”
Julian nodded his head as she handed him her phone and quickly dialed your number. You answered on the first ring and he could tell that you were upset, not only about your parents, but about him also walking away from you.
“Hello?!”
“Mom!”
“JULIAN OLIVER! Where are you?! You need to get back here NOW.”
“I’m with Mama Tee. She’s walking me back right now.”
“Once you get back here, you are not leaving my sight until you turn eighteen, you understand?” You told him and he nodded although you couldn’t see him.
“Yes, ma’am.”
Julian quickly handed Mama Tee her phone back and she could hear your quiet sobs.
“It’s okay, Y/N, he’s fine. Not a scratch on him. He just got upset because you were upset and he wanted to leave. Of course he told me that he wanted his dad, but I told him that he has to be patient and wait until after the game.”
“I never want to argue or deal with confrontation in front of him but all I saw was red when my parents showed up.”
“He also told me that because they made you upset that he doesn’t want to be around them and that they need to leave.”
“Well lucky for him, his wish has been granted because they literally just left. They offered to help look for him, but I said absolutely not.”
“Well, we’re outside the suite now, you can come and get him.” She told you as you quickly hung up the phone before practically running towards the door and opening it to see Julian looking at you with Mama Tee standing behind him.
Julian quickly hugged you and you were squeezing him for dear life.
“Listen to me, do not EVER do that again.” You told him as you grabbed his face for him to look up at you and he nodded.
“I don’t like seeing you upset or seeing you cry. They made you cry.”
“I… well they won’t be a problem anymore, okay? Promise.” You explained as you wiped a few tears that had fallen on Julian’s cheeks and kissed his forehead. 
“Okay.”
“Now, get back in there and watch the game with your grandparents. They were worried about you too.”
As Julian went inside the suite to sit back down, you turned back to Mama Tee and smiled. 
“I can’t thank you enough for spotting him and bringing him back.”
“Of course, I know he’s a good kid, and his main concern was protecting you but he also told me he knows not to interrupt when adults are talking. He got upset, so he left.”
“Yeah, that sounds like my baby. I swear that I couldn’t have asked for a better first born.”
“You and Joe definitely have one amazing kid.”
It was now close to eleven at night and Joe had tucked Julian in before coming into your bedroom and falling face first onto your bed with you laughing at him.
“Is someone tired?”
“Definitely, but not tired enough not to spend any time with you.” He replied as he moved to lay his head on your chest as you wrapped your arms around him. 
“How did your talk with your baby boy go?” You asked because you immediately wasted no time in telling what had happened during the game when you saw him in the tunnel before his presser.
“He knows now that if he becomes upset, he has to tell one of us before simply walking away. He was upset and I get it, because I definitely told him to look out for you which he was doing. It shouldn’t be a problem again. But, my parents were okay?”
“Yes and they apologized about everything and also apologized about my parents because they didn’t even know the full story. They actually gave me hugs and your theory was confirmed.”
“What theory? And I’m sorry that they basically ambushed you. But you know that you have me and Julian to protect you.”
“Your mom told me straight up that she never hated me and yes my two favorite boys.”
“I told you and you didn’t want to believe me.”
“And she wants to not only be a part of Julian’s life but mine too but she knows that this all isn’t going to happen overnight.” You explained to Joe as he began to play with your necklace.
“I’m going to get you a new one.”
“What’s wrong with this one?!”
“Nothing’s wrong with it, I just figured I could add a few diamonds to it to give it a little upgrade.”
“Fine, not going to argue about that, but I want it in rose gold.”
“Anything you ask for, if I have the ability to get, consider it yours.”
-
One year later
“Julian, you want to hold her?” Joe asked as he was cuddling your newborn baby girl, Juliet against his chest and he eagerly nodded.
“Go sit down over there and I’ll hand her to you.”
As he sat down in the corner of your hospital room, he was all smiles as he looked at his dad in front of him as he anticipated holding his baby sister for the first time. From the moment you told Julian that he was going to be a big brother, he stepped into his role and took it very seriously.
“You ready? You have to make sure you support her head.”
“Okay, I’m ready.”
Joe gently placed her in Julian’s arms and he was in absolute awe.
“She’s so little. Hi Juliet, I’m your big brother, Julian and I love you so much already.” He told her as she cooed and looked up at him with her brown eyes.
Joe recorded the entire interaction on his phone and when he was finished, placed a kiss on top of your head.
“We really did it.” He whispered in your ear as you looked at him confused.
“Did what, babe?”
“We finally got our happy ending. We’re together, married, and have our Julian and Juliet.”
“And it only took maybe ten years.”
“Doesn’t even matter how long it took, we made it happen. Still can’t believe that everyone in the house has the exact same birthday. Now what are the odds?”
“I know like that is literally insane. Now we have four birthdays to celebrate on December 10th.”
“Now, does my wife want sushi since I know these nine months have driven you up the wall with not being able to have any.:
“Yes, please, oh my gosh. I couldn’t get her out of me fast enough. I forgot how much I actually loved it until I couldn’t have any.” You told him and he laughed as he shook his head at you.
“Mom!”
“Yes, Julian?”
“Can I request a little brother, next?” He asked and your eyes went wide as you looked at Joe.
“Um, let’s just try to focus on being a good big brother to Juliet first and then we can see.” He told him as he adjusted the flower headband that was on Juliet, a gift from her grandparents.
“JOSEPH!”
“I… what?! You know it’s hard for me to tell him no!”
“If that’s the case, I’m going to need a lot more than sushi.”
“That’s fine, how about a Birkin?”
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Liked by lahjay_10, cincinattibengals, sabrinaaa, teehiggins and 2,472,097 others
joeyb_9: Finally got our happy ending. Welcome to the world, Juliet Maeve Burrow. Julian is so excited to be your big brother ❤️
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gangstalkerbarbie · 1 day ago
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In a number of societies in the past, there were jobs reserved for people with isolating conditions or people with disabilities — in some Arctic cultures shamans are born, not made, because shamanhood is one such job for people we would call schizophrenic, for example.
In pre-revolution Ukraine, blind men who needed to support families had a protected social role as a type of lorekeeper and bard, with claim to a circuit of villages to ply their trade in. They often took in orphans to lead them around, but only taught their art to the ones that could do that work according to the rules governing it and keeping it the welfare system that it was.
There's something kind of similar with witches across religions as a job, in the same cultural sphere, because witches and folk healers (there is overlap) were touched by the other side themselves (typically you would become something like a znakharka because you were let's say an orphan with severe trauma, or so obviously what we would call borderline that someone had to teach you to control it, and if you already know what those plants do why not learn more), and therefore qualified to help other people going through it.
People didn't always like or trust them, but they fed them and made sure they were safe anyways, because there was a niche reserved for people like that even though there was very little anyone knew how to do for them.
Entire social safety nets used to exist in a wide variety of diverse places that not only provided care for people who couldn't care for themselves in some ways, but set up systems that preserved their agency. I like that people are concerned on here for the mere level of caring about people currently ostracised and people whose disabilities make them hard to be around and people who cannot do most conventional work, but when thinking about people's welfare I think it's important to also think about ways they can be integrated in your society, in your life, next to you as other human beings, right now.
Because after they leave crisis mode, once their basic needs are met, all people want to give back. I think a lot of people get stuck on taking care of the psychologically ill and variously disabled, but there are going to be times when they don't need as much help as they do now, and what are they going to feel whole and competent doing then? What has been done to create an environment where they can gainfully be employed at skills they are good at, without being forced out of those professions because other people with less to worry about can meet demand faster?
In this essay I will prove that the modern equivalent of the kobzar is the furry artist
If safety in your ideal society is entirely based on care by networks of affinity, and does not provide care for people who are not liked by anybody, then your society is actually even worse than the situation we are in now.
Pissing off people close to you or over-exhausting your social network or isolating yourself is often an inherent part of many mental health problems, addictions, etc. By the time people need care the most, they have often lost all their networks of affinity, and with some bad luck, any of us could find ourselves in that situation.
There has to be unconditional care available for the more unlikable of us, or there isn't really a safety net for any of us.
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copperbadge · 1 day ago
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bet you wouldn't be sick if you were still masking
I know that you must be feeling really hurt and helpless and ignored right now; a lot of people are struggling with the way the world is and feel profoundly powerless. I know I do. So I can understand you might find it satisfying and empowering to lash out at someone you think earned the misery they're in, even when you don't have all the facts.
But the truth is, it feels good for like a minute, and then the feeling fades. And if the only rush you get is in trying to hurt others, it turns you into a small, mean person that nobody wants to be around. I hope you avoid that; the world has enough lonely bullies, we don't need to make more. But you're on the journey, not me, so it's up to you. I hope life gets easier for you soon.
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holdmytesseract · 2 days ago
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One Night or Forever?
Daryl Dixon x fem!Reader
Summary: When one thing leads to another, you and Daryl spend a passionate night together at the CDC. Unfortunately, neither of you is interpreting the signals right afterwards...
Warnings: 18+! MDNI! smut (not entirely graphic, but it's definitely there - like, you know exactly what's going on), uhhh sub and dom Daryl? unprotected rough-ish sex? Daryl gets a bj (yes, you read that right), he's a bit mean, too - but also a cutie patootie, uhh slight angst? bit of drama, alcohol - drunk-ish Daryl and tipsy reader, fluff, swear words, bickering
Set in Season 1!
Word Count: 4,5k
a/n: You want it, you got it, friends. I don't know what this is, though - or which demons possessed me as I wrote it. I really don't. I also don't know how I should feel about it. Embarrassed? Proud? Send help, lol.
Anyways, I hope you like this! Please go easy on me. Smut isn't really my forte...
EoH Masterlist °☆• LITRM Masterlist °☆• Daryl Masterlist °☆• Masterlist
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"Booyah!"
Daryl's toast had been the starting shot for an evening full of conversation, fun, laughter - and alcohol. Some would say reams of alcohol. Wine, booze, beer - you and the group stopped at nothing. That was probably the reason why everyone staggered somewhere on a scale between tipsy and shit faced drunk at the end of the evening.
You were currently on your way to your personal room - something you'd describe as a luxury. Sure, back at the quarry you had your own tent, but there was a huge difference between that and a whole goddamn room. With a own freaking shower! It was crazy. Who would've thought that something so plain and simple would become such a valued, precious thing? Most likely nobody, because it was something taken for granted.
Well... Not anymore. Not since the world went to shit.
After passing a very drunk Glenn on the way, you more or less stumbled into your room. Tipsy... You were definitely tipsy. Without a single care in the world, you started to shed your clothes the moment the door shut close behind you. All you wanted to do was sleep. You had too much alcohol coursing through your veins to search for something you could use as a pyjama. You hadn't a problem with sleeping naked. Not tonight.
Unfortunately had your plan a catch... One that you weren't aware of yet.
This wasn't your room.
You were just about to free your body of the last piece of fabric you were wearing - a pair of admittedly beautiful dark blue lace panties, when a sudden voice managed to almost send you into cardiac arrest.
"Wha' the fuck 'r ya doin' in my room?!"
You startled so bad, that you almost lost balance and fell flat on your ass. Your balance was a bit off-track anyways, due to the wine...
With wide eyes you turned around to face the intruder.
"Daryl?"
You blinked. "What are you doing here?" He scoffed; his cheeks puffed out and reddened. He had been drinking way more than you did, and it showed. The archer's hands were fumbling clumsily with the fly of his jeans. "Jus' been taken a damn piss, 'n 'm comin' back to find ya standin' in my room." You crossed your arms over your bare - an information which hadn't reached Daryl's brain yet - chest. "This is clearly my room, Dixon." He scoffed again. "'S not!" "Yes, it is!" "'S not!" The man took a few wobbly steps closer. "Go bullshit someone else, I-" He stopped abruptly in the middle of his sentence; eyes widening to the size of plates. Now the information had been received and processed.
"Yer almost naked," he stated; bluntly staring.
Oh, you suddenly realised and remembered as well. He was right.
In any other situation, you'd have frantically tried to cover yourself up and perhaps even threw an insult at the man standing across from you, but the alcohol lowered your boundary of shame and loosened you up; making you see things more relaxed.
You huffed out a breath. "Yeah, no shit, Sherlock." Daryl still blinked and tried very hard to not let his eyes drop, but that was an almost impossible task for the alcoholized man. "Why?" You shrugged your shoulders. "'Cause I wanted to go to sleep." The archer swallowed hard. "In my room? Naked? Ya lost yer damn mind, woman?" "It's my room," your tipsy self was still profoundly convinced, while you made your way over to the bed on slightly wobbly legs. Daryl just watched you; flabbergasted, speechless, shocked - and incredibly turned on. After all, he had a damn pretty woman in his room - no, bed. Half naked!
"You could join me, Dixon." He scoffed again and tried to walk in a straight line over to the armchair; accepting his fate. "In yer damn dreams. 'S ain't gonna help me - or my hard-on." You giggled at his words like a schoolgirl and rolled around in the sheets. "That the reason why you can't get that zipper up? You like me, Daryl? Like what you see?" You pestered him with questions; smirking, and watched his cheeks redden even more - if that was physically possible and your eyes didn't betray you. "Shuddup," Daryl just growled in response. You giggled again, before a long beat of silence passed between the both of you.
The alcohol didn't just lower your boundary of shame... It also caused you to become bolder. "I could help you with that, you know..." You tried to sound as flirty and seductive as possible and turned in the sheets once more, but now to face the man sitting across from the bed. You perched yourself onto your stomach and crossed your ankles in the air; swaying your legs.
Gods, you felt like a teenager again. Damn the alcohol and your crush on the archer. It was a dangerous combination, since you hadn't planned to actually act on said crush. Well, and here you were now in his - nu.uh, your - bed, almost naked and trying to seduce him.
Some might say this escalated quickly...
"Help me with wha'?" The archer finally responded after a long moment; dumbfounded. His usually very smart and witty brain slowed down by the alcohol. You thought for a hot minute that he had already fallen asleep on you. You rolled your eyes and groaned - acting like Daryl just said the stupidest thing in the world. "Your boner," you deadpanned - as if it was the most normal thing to say.
The archer swallowed hard; feeling his chest (and pants) tightening.
"Wha'?" He crooked out. The normally so talkative, glibly redneck seemingly rendered speechless by your boldness.
Once again, you rolled your eyes. "Do you reaaaaally want me to spell it out for you, D?" Daryl clearly needed a moment to recover, but once he did, he scoffed.
"Pf, yer bluffin'."
"I'm not."
"Yeah, ya 'r."
"No, I'm not."
"Yes, ya 'r. Can tell. Yer way to innocent fer shit like tha', sunshine."
"Are you challenging me, Dixon?"
"Nah, jus' statin' facts."
Now you were the one who scoffed. He really asked for it, didn't he? You smirked and hid your face in the blanket beneath you. Oh, you were so going to prove him wrong.
You rolled your barely covered body around a third time, but this time to get up from the bed - which was a much more difficult task than expected, but you made it in the end - even though not gracefully and certainly not seductively. "Facts, huh?" You asked the crossbow-wielding archer then with a raised eyebrow and your hands on your hips. He crossed his arms over his plaid beige-brown shirt clad chest; bare forearms and biceps bulging with the movement. "Yes, facts." Although he stared into your eyes with his blue coloured irises, he still had a hard time for them to actually stay on your face.
"Well, you can go screw your opinions - or me. Your choice, pretty boy," you stated and shrugged your shoulders as you bridged the short distance between the bed and the armchair. Before the younger Dixon could even do as much as open his mouth for a snarky respond, you had dropped to your knees in front of him - between his manspread legs.
Daryl's eyes widened and his jaw slacked. "Wha' 'r ya doin'?!" He literally screeched and gripped the armrests of the armchair. "Proofing you wrong, pretty boy." You smiled up at him like a Cheshire cat; hands and fingers clumsily trying to open his jeans. "F-Fuckin' hell, wha'?! Yer insane, woman!" The archer cursed above you, but also didn't make any moves to stop you. So, you took that as a sign to continue. And continuing you did...
It took you a hot minute to get your eye-hand coordination straight and overcome the obstacles which were his jeans and boxers, but once you did, there was no holding back. "Ya really gonna do th- F-Fuck..."
You did.
"Told you, Dixon," you stated with a mischievous glimmer in your eyes; hands firmly cupping him. Daryl answered nothing. The archer had a hard time to control his breathing and rapidly beating heart. He was still gripping the armrests like a vice - his knuckles already turning white. He really couldn't believe this was happening right now. Was he asleep and dreaming? Was he hallucinating? Did the wine manage to fog up his brain so much that his eyes were deceiving him? But when he felt your lips wrap around him, he instantly threw all those thoughts overboard again. This was real. It had to be real. After all, he was feeling it, right?
"F-Fuckin' hell," he cursed again; feeling waves of pleasure crash over him. One of his hands loosened its grip on the armrest and went in your hair instead - tying your loose hair into a makeshift ponytail. You were already too far gone to care; the taste of him addictive.
Working your magic, you tried to grant the man above you as much pleasure as possible - and it seemed to work. Within a few minutes, Daryl was a whimpering mess - a side you'd never thought you were ever going to see of him. Not in your wildest dreams.
"Ain't... Ain't g-gonna last," the archer panted breathlessly; the hand in your hair twitching. You didn't want him to. You wanted him to fall apart. A gentle squeeze of your hand was all it took. "Y-Y/N, damnit, 'm gon'- Gonna cu-" His sentence got interrupted by a low moan that paved its way to the forefront of his lips. The hand in your hair twitched again as he attempted to pull you off him. You didn't let him, though, and easily dodged his lousy attempt. Instead, you helped him ride the wave. His thighs twitched; muscles tensing as his high crashed into him. Daryl felt like he had been hit by an eighteen-wheeler - but in the best way possible. It had been so long...
The gentle grip he had of your hair slackened; hand falling limply to his side. You lifted your head to look at him to witness his blissed-out state. Daryl's eyes were closed, and his breathing laboured. You smiled; hands gently caressing his clothed thighs. "You believe me now, D?" He gave you a mere nod. Clearly he needed another few moments to get his head straight again. Your smile never ceased as you kept up your fingers movements. Your knees protested by now, but you didn't care.
Another few moments passed, before the archer peeled his eyes open again. Seeing you still on your knees for him managed to send another shockwave of arousal throughout his entire body.
Wide-blown eyes stared at you intensely; the gears turning in his fogged up head.
"T-Thanks, I guess," he whispered then. His voice was still hoarse. You smiled up at him. "You're welcome, pretty boy. Said I'm gonna help you." Daryl nodded almost shyly and clumsily stuffed himself back inside his boxers. You eyed him thoroughly and started to giggle. "Didn't think you'd loose it so fast. Wouldn't have pecked you to be a... premature guy." Not that it mattered to you, but you couldn't help yourself but to tease him a bit. It was meant to be a playful comment, but you seemed to hit a sore spot...
You could practically see how his eyes darkened, before he narrowed them. "Whatcha say, huh?" He asked in a gruff voice and stood up; towering over you. You blinked - were a bit taken aback by the sudden shift in his demeanour. "I-I, uh... Said I didn't think you'd be one t-to, uh, come too early..." The archer growled under his breath. "Ya better watch yer mouth, sunshine," he said in a threatening tone and grabbed your arms to pull you up on your feet. Daryl quickly noticed, though, that his legs were even more wobbly now that they've already been before; forcing him to take cautious steps. "What are we doing, pretty boy? You gonna make me pay for saying that?" You gave another sassy remark; provoking him and tickling his nerve ends even further. A grunt passed his chapped lips as he dragged you with him. Once close to the bed, he wrapped his arms firmly around your bare midsection and literally threw you onto the bed - wobbly legs be damned. You giggled at his eagerness and slid upwards to rest your head on one of the pillows; giving the man a confident look. "C'mon then, pretty boy, show me what you got. I know you want to." He scoffed and crawled on the bed. "Pretty boy my ass." You just giggled again. You felt intoxicated by the wine you had consumed and definitely aroused - which got only worse when you felt calloused, deft hands gripping your delicate skin. Daryl parted your legs and settled on his knees between them. His eyes were directed on your face. He looked like a predator - ready to attack his prey. It was incredibly hot.
"'M gonna shut tha' sassy mouth 'a yers, just ya wait," he growled in a deep voice, and wrapped his arms and hands around your thighs like a snake - holding them firmly and simultaneously keeping you splayed open for him, before he literally yanked you down; bringing your hips closer to his.
Your breath hitched in your throat at his sudden movement and the upcoming anticipation.
His fingertips danced over the skin on your hips then - and suddenly got your dark blue lace panties ripped into shreds.
"Daryl!" You shrieked, then gasped. "Those were my favourites, I-" "'S jus' a damn piece 'a fabric. Dun be such a crybaby," he interrupted you; instantly putting you in your place. Your mouth clapped shut. This was yet another new side of him. Sure, you knew he was hotheaded, but he literally just went from kinda submissive to dominant within the blink of an eye. Was it the alcohol? Or truly his temper?
The clinking of his belt ripped you out of your thoughts. Some shuffling and the rustling of fabric was the only premonition you got, before you felt him against your hot and pulsating center. Your hips instantly bucked; trying to get closer.
More friction.
More pleasure.
More of Daryl.
The archer hovering above you scoffed. "Look how needy ya are. Dun even hafta prepare ya." You could see the corners of his mouth twitching into a small smirk. "Tis all jus' from gettin' me off, huh?" You nodded and bit your lip. Daryl on the contrary shook his head, "Yer tha' desperate? Pf... Pathetic." and lined himself up, before hitting home.
Stars exploded in front of your eyes as his hips met yours. The most sinful moan the archer had ever heard in his life slipped past your lips; only spurring him on more. He picked up a firm, steady pace - leaving you a mess beneath him barely within a few minutes. Just what you did to him.
Revenge was sweet, wasn't it?
His precise, powerful thrusts carried you from one high to the next - and Daryl enjoyed it. He loved to see you fall apart beneath him. And this time, he was the one lasting longer. "Who's commin' too soon now, huh? 'S not me, sunshine. Told ya I'd shut tha' sassy mouth 'a yers," he growled lowly; slowing his pace to just give you a few moments of recovery. You moaned at the sheer endless pleasure he granted you. Your hands gripped his thick arms like a vice after he had planted both palms firmly in the mattress beside your head to gain more leverage. "F-Fuck, Daryl," you whimpered; fingernails digging into his sweaty biceps. "I know. Jus' one more, 'kay? Can ya give me one more?" You nodded wordlessly. "Good girl," the archer praised and picked up his speed once again; pulling another sweet moan alongside some incoherent noises from you.
Your hands travelled. They left his arms to rest on his chest, where they fisted the fabric of his plaid shirt with the ripped off sleeves. The fabric held a darkened stain - a puddle of sweat formed on his chest.
Your hands continued to fist his shirt, as you pulled - an attempt to undo a few buttons. But once the archer noticed what your mission was, he stopped dead in his movements. "Nah, dun do tha'," he scolded you instantly and peeled your hands away from the fabric covering his upper body. "W-Why?" You asked breathlessly; not understanding his sudden mood shift. "'"Cause I told ya to!" He snapped.
Just in that moment, you realised that you must've hit another sore spot... But this time one that actually seemed to get to him. Not one that managed to turn him on.
"S-Sorry, D-Daryl, I-" You immediately apologised, but got interrupted once more. "Keep holdin' on ta my arms, if yer need sum'thin' to hold on to." His voice was gruff, but way more soft than a few moments ago. The archer redirected your hands and placed them once more around his sweaty biceps. Without another word, he continued where he left off, causing your grip to instantly tighten. "There ya go," he praised you again and readjusted your legs with his thighs. Just the slight change of angle was enough to send you a third time over the edge. This time, though, you dragged him right with you.
A broken sound - close to a cry, left the man's lips as he pulled out and coated the supple skin of your stomach with his release. A single droplet of sweat rolled down his neck as he threw his head back in ecstasy. It was a sight to behold. A sight you might never forget for the rest of your life - no matter how long your life was going to be.
A few moments later collapsed Daryl on the mattress beside you. He was clearly spent. Perhaps this had been something you both needed. Who knew?
"Imma take a shower," the archer announced after a while and left the bed - but not before gentleman-like wiping the mess he made on your stomach away with his hand. Without another word, he left, while you just laid there - still naked and staring at the ceiling; recalling in your mind what just happened. The sex managed to sober you up a bit. Did that really just happen? Had you been dreaming this?
You heard the water run, but not how Daryl returned to the room and settled down for the night in the armchair. You had ventured off to dreamland at some point.
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To say the next morning was awkward was an absolute understatement. Awkward was not even remotely enough to describe the vibe between the both of you.
When you woke up again, the archer was nowhere to be seen. Now sober, you left the bed, picked up your clothes, noticed that you truly were - in fact in his room, and tiptoed butt naked down the hallway into your room. Luckily nobody had seen you. That would've been scandalous, right?
Your luck was also that everybody was quite hungover from last night. Some more, some less. Therefore noticed nobody the way you and Daryl acted around each other.
You could barely manage to look into his eyes.
You felt ashamed; thinking that you pushed him too far yesterday night. Thinking, that you were too bold and unable to control your damn feelings. Thinking that you pushed him away, instead of drawing him in. You anticipated that the archer must hate you now - and you couldn't even blame him...
Nevertheless seemed a conversation inevitable. You didn't want to destroy the friendship - if you could even call it that - the both of you had before last night.
It took you days to bite the bullet and ask him to talk, though. Sure, you had been on the road again since the CDC was a dead end, but that wasn't an excuse in your eyes.
"D-Daryl?" You approached him cautiously as you found him alone in the stables of the Greene farm; saddling a horse to go looking for Sophia. "Whatcha want?" He asked you and gave you a short look. You swallowed nervously. "Can we, uh, can we talk?" "'Bout wha'?" You watched him work for a moment, while your fingers fumbled with the hem of your t-shirt; trying to gather all the courage you could find. "That, uh, night at the CDC..." Your words came out as a whisper, but Daryl heard them nonetheless - and froze in all his tracks.
"Why'd ya wanna talk 'bout tha'?" He asked nonchalantly after a beat of silence and continued his work; had seemingly shaken off the small 'shock' quite quick. "I-I..." You started and sighed. "Things f-feel so weird between us since that n-night, and... I don't want that. I-I'm sorry for what I did. I'm s-sorry for making you sleep with me." Your eyes were stuck on him. You watched him and tried to gauge his reaction - afraid of what was going to happen.
"Yer sorry 'bout it?" Daryl asked then - almost in disbelief. Then he scoffed. "Do ya regret it?"
That was a question you didn't see coming. A question you haven't thought about yet. Did you regret it? Your memories took you back in time; letting you relive that night you shared with him. The answer was clear - as you quickly discovered.
"No, I don't, but... It was wrong. I shouldn't have-" "Wrong?" He interrupted you. His voice appalled. "Tha's what ya think 'bout this? 'Bout... us?" Daryl accused you with a grimace on his face. Was that... sadness you could detect in his blue orbs? Hurt?
You blinked; "U-Us?" were definitely confused by his words. "W-What do you mean 'us'?" "Ya know wha' I mean, Y/N." You shook your head. "No, Daryl. No, I don't. We've been practically ignoring each other since the CDC. We can't even talk properly! Neither of us can look into the other's eyes! Everything is just... weird, and you talk about an 'us'? No, I don't get it. Tell me. Explain it."
A frustrated huff left the archer's lips, before he started to gnaw at the pad of his thumb; averting your eyes. All of a sudden, the usually so confident redneck became all shy and insecure. "Dunno how," he started; merely shrugging his shoulders. "'S difficult, 'n I ain't good with words." "Try it, D," you encouraged him and gave him a soft smile. "Please. I want to make things right between us again." The archer nodded and took another moment - most likely to gather his thoughts. "'S tha' feeling, ya know? Can't pin it down. Always feelin' so strange whenever yer close to me."
Your heart skipped more than just one beat as his words urged to your ears. Could it be...? No...
"W-What do you feel? Can you... describe it?" Daryl lowered his gaze to the ground. The little stone laying beside his left foot suddenly became really interesting. "Jus' strange. Gets harder to breathe, 'n... My stomach's all messed up. Feels like an itch I can't scratch." You couldn't believe this was happening. Did that night cause Daryl to fall in love with you? "You're doing good, D. Keep going. What else?" You had to know.
He grunted; his foot playing with that little stone, before kicking it aimlessly over the concrete ground. "I... always go back to tha' night in my head. Can't forget it. Yer look. Yer touch. The way ya felt, I-" He stopped himself to take a deep breath. And you smiled. Perhaps having slept with him hadn't been a mistake. Perhaps you interpreted his behaviour wrong. Perhaps you just misread the signs...
"I jus' dunno how to act 'round ya. I dunno wha's happening to me. Tha's why I ain't talkin' to ya. Didn't mean to ignore ya..." Daryl apologised with his head still lowered.
You stepped closer to him and cautiously reached for his hand. He flinched, but didn't pull away. "Daryl, I... I think I know what happened to you," you whispered. "'N wha's tha'?" He asked; finally brave enough to lift his head to look into your eyes. You smiled and squeezed his hand. "I think you... are in love."
As quick as the man had lowered his guard, as quick was it up again.
He pulled his hand out of your grasp and scoffed, before he took a few steps back. "Pf. Love? Me? Tha's ridiculous, woman - 'n we both know it!" "Is it, yeah? You really think so?" "Yes!" He yelled, and wanted to rush past you - but you stopped him with your palm splayed on his chest. You didn't know if what your heart made you do was a wise decision, but it acted on its own will. Your head was powerless anyway.
Daryl's eyes travelled from yours to the hand on his chest and back. "Whatcha doin', woman?! Leave me the hell alo-" You had heard enough. You had held yourself back long enough. This was the only option you had left. It was do or die.
You cut the man off with standing on your tiptoes and connecting your lips to his. It was a chaste, gentle kiss - but nonetheless meaningful. It felt so right. So good. His lips so soft and warm - compared to his seemingly rough exterior. His blond-brown goatee tickled your skin in the best way possible.
Once more, Daryl froze to the ground; not moving a muscle.
When your lips left his again with a soft pop and you reopened your eyes, you could see how his eyelids fluttered slowly open as well. You could feel his heart galloping underneath your palm. "What do you feel now, Daryl?" You asked in a hushed tone. Your eyes never left his. The archer swallowed hard. His Adam's apple bobbed in his throat. "I-I-I..." He stammered out; his cheeks heating up. "G-Good," he croaked out. "R-Real good." You smiled - happy that your heart had made the right decision. "Wanna do it again?" He blinked. The tips of his ears got red as well. "I-If yer willin' t-to k-kiss me again?" Your smile even widened, before you reached up to cup his beardy, red cheeks in your palms to pull him into another kiss. Daryl gasped against your lips; eyes falling shut and lips following your lead. It caused the kiss to get more intimate. More demanding. More passionate.
His hands acted on their own will, as they settled on your waist and pulled you closer. Your body crashed against his. You could tell that he hadn't kissed a lot in his life; his movements clumsy and messy - but perfectly Daryl. And you loved it. You didn't care how experienced or skilled he was. All you cared about was him - and all the love he deserved you wanted to give him.
He was far from perfect; had his flaws - but so were you.
"What do you say now about love, pretty boy?" You asked in a playful, yet loving manner; your hands crossed behind his neck. Daryl's hands gently squeezed your sides, "Shuddup." before he dipped his head to indulge you into yet another kiss.
Yeah... He was definitely whipped.
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Tags: @angelwings-crossbowstrings @belitoxx @fictive-sl0th @marvelcasey05 @loz-3 @whore4romance @stitchintimefan @bigbaldheadname @making-the-most-0f-it @erebus-et-eigengrau @km-ffluv @0-aubrie0 @sweetz1919 @mikaela-granger @secretsicanthideanymore @dilfdixon @txtttttttttttttt @dixons-sunshine @cakesandtom @mayday2007 @dixonsdarkelf @huntedmusicgardenn @ffsjustletmesleep
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stillarobyn · 2 days ago
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I understand the intention behind this post and I don't disagree with it. I don't.
If you're writing a period piece or something with a certain dark tone, then yes, you absolutely want to keep to that, give your gruff sailor a mumbled line about not being like most other men, or your scattered workaholic scientist can say she never felt like she was missing out on anything by not having a partner while they save the world.
But do not limit the reach of fanfiction by expecting it to be held to the same standards.
Because we need both. Because the target audience for a lot of works that employ this are young, they're disconnected from community, and they're lost. They think they're broken or they don't fit or they are made wrong.
I, a millennial, didn't know about bisexuality until I read about it in fanfic somewhere around 2003 (I was 13). I didn't know any out gay or queer people growing up. It was still scandalous on tv, and my parents didn't have any problem with it, they just didn't talk about it. I can't imagine how isolating it would have felt if my parents prevented me from watching anything with gay characters or spoke negatively about them.
My first discovery of nonbinary identity was in a bandom fic I read in 2010 (I was 20, for those playing the home game). It was maybe two years after that that I began to talk with nonbinary/genderqueer/genderfluid people online. I knew a couple of binary trans people in college, and one in high school, but this was my first time meeting people who weren't a binary gender. In 2012! It took another two years for me, at this point a full-ass adult, to start describing myself that way.
All of this oversharing to say...my understanding of queer identity was not hand-held by anyone in my life, but boy I learned to accept these foreign ideas I saw in myself because I had a safe fictional environment to explore these concepts and terms.
I think it was 2014-2016 when fanfic spaces had a boom of "everyone is trans" AUs and headcanons, and they were often rose-tinted and a bit twee, but that's the point of them. I saw identities I had to look up, and when I asked in follow-up "okay, but what does a person who feels like that look/act like?" it was all crickets, except in fiction, and specifically fanfic.
"But the world is different now, not knowing is no excuse" NOPE. not with anti-lgbtqia legislation passing in the US, or in other hostile countries around the world (I'm from the US, my argument is US-centric based on my experience and knowledge, but by no means exclusionary of people in other countries), or even family situations or rural upbringing or any other circumstance that isolated young queer folk from other queer folk.
A popular live-service video game introduced a nonbinary character and I saw twitch chats full of people who were just confused and uneducated. Ignoring those who were hostile was easy, but the uninformed, especially the non-English-speakers and people who didn't come from Western cultures, were largely open to learning something they never had framework for. Made all the more frustrating in a game environment where the characters didn't make a habit of having these discussions on screen, but that's a different rant.
I don't know if OP intended this in reference to original media, or toward fic, but I saw a lot of established characters in the reblogs so I just want to address that. I'm a characterization first fic reader, so I get it. "Everyone is trans" fics aren't for me, but there's a space needed for them if someone needs to see Captain Kirk and Spock debating the application of terminology of human gender and sexuality in interplanetary cultural settings...now actually I kind of want that fic so I played myself.
Dragon Age Veilguard came under attack for daring to openly and forwardly use the term "nonbinary" in its fantasy world, as though something about the word is inherently incompatible with the fantasy genre? But the game was pretty clear in its goal to create a safe gaming space for marginalized folks when so often their experiences are erased, ignored, tokenized, or stereotyped. The narrative, therefore, had to be hostile to the unaccepting, educational for the ignorant, and validating to the vulnerable. Getting to play in a world where people are referred to as nonbinary (just like me) and where people use they/them pronouns (just like me) and where no one ridicules or attacks them specifically for this? It felt comfortable and safe and the world was ending in the game, but I felt a personal empowerment in my immersion.
More complex and nuanced discussions by characters about their queer identity add to the picture. It shouldn't be in every work because every author has their own angle and their own philosophy about it, but they have just as much a right to a seat at the table. You can have your fics where Tony Stark's sexuality is a smirk and a wink, and you can have your fics where he explains that he used to call himself bisexual but the world is bigger and weirder so he considers himself omnisexual now. And if you don't like that, scroll past it. The author didn't write it for you, but someone else needs to hear that.
Maybe this is just a personal vent that escaped containment, but I feel the need to remind some folks that some people need the LGBT center brochure version because they didn't get one in the mail. It's a tough time for everyone in this community, no need to make it tougher.
he would not fucking say that but it’s he would not fucking talk about his queer identity like he was reading out of a college campus lgbt center brochure
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leilawanderingaround · 21 hours ago
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Having brainrot about Yandere Phainon again... I should go see my therapist.
"I will have to reject you, fair lady. For I already have someone waiting for me beyond this wall."
Phainon- the ever gentleman, kind hearted hero of Okhema has many suitors on his tail be it man or women but it is undeniable that he only has eyes for one person only.
This person is considered the biggest mystery of Okhema. They would occasionally catch Lord Phainon gaze ever so lovingly at a locket but would soon put it away after noticing he was being watched.
Even the Tribios were curious enough to ask him. The deliverer would only shyly chuckle, scratching his neck. "It is someone I left behind at Aedes Elysiae. I hope to reunite with her one day."
Hearing that they would pale and soon apologies. All people know that Aedes Elysiae was destroyed by the black tide. Its fate is left undiscovered to most people. Only a few people know what truly happened to Aedes Elysiae and the supposed beloved of the saviour of Amphoreus.
"Still mourning for her, deliverer?" While most of the time, Mydei would have knocked or raised his voice to announce his arrival. Today was quite different. To lock oneself in a room of the departed and forbid everyone else from going inside on the day of their death anniversary is quite rude. Especially when it's you.
The crown prince carefully picked the lock on the door before gently opening it to walk inside. Not wanting to affect anything that belonged to you.
"Mydei, sorry but I am not in the mood to banter with you today" Phainon said, still not turning from your bookshelf to face his friend-rival.
"Hm, not like I am here to fight you. Where is it?" Mydei shook his head. Now is clearly not the time for such a thing, even he knows that. "Her locket as well as her weapon. Aglaea told me you kept them, handed them over."
"Surely the crown prince of Kremnos would know better than to ask for something that is not his" Phainon still keeping that nonchalant attitude, turn around to smile at Mydei.
The crown prince has to stop himself from hitting the deliverer on the face. After all, they have promised Aglaea to not wrought havoc on a day such as this. "Well, it is not my kingdom that killed her."
"She is not dead" Of course that sentence alone was enough to anger Phainon.
Mydei let out a huff, crossing his arms "Right, right, as if being frozen in time, waiting for her death is any different than truly dying."
"Mydei, we have talked about this. Once the prophecy is completed, she can be rid of Oronyx's influence and return to Okhema. Let's not lose hope, my friend." Phainon said, lending an olive branch to the crown prince. A final act of putting down the flame of hate between the two.
"She does it all for you. Betray her god, sacrificing herself, and frozen Aedes Elysiae in time. To save your home, family and dear friend. I can only hope you return her as much as she has give, Phainon." Mydei said, reaching Phainon's side and took the bow near him- your weapon before walking out. "Priest of Oronyx, helping Kephale's soldier, how laughable"
Phainon watched as Mydei left the room, his hand held tight onto your locket "You don't have to worry. For her..."
"I'm willing to forsaken my tilte as the hero and burn Amphoreus down just to see her again..."
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rosenclaws · 2 days ago
Note
Could I pleasssse request a smut/fluff fic with Logan where he secretly likes the reader and doesn't like the readers bf? The reader is in their early to mid twenties and has been best friends with Logan for years and he snaps one night when her bf is being an asshole 👀 thank you so much 😭
warnings: Angst to fluff, asshole boyfriend, he's mutant hating low key, threats, fighting
a/n: Hehehe i fucking LOVE a good jealousy fic, also I based the asshole ex on multiple asshole exes of my own lol.
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Things were well and truly complicated. You always knew what being a mutant meant for your relationship life. Having to dip your toes into the water to see if they the kind of person who wanted your kind dead or if they were more open to the idea of mutants.
Even then you ran into all kinds of assholes. If you could even get past the first date then you'd have to drop the bomb that you work at a mutant school with mutant children. Safe to say your dating life was pretty empty.
"You here again sweetheart?" You roll your eyes when you hear Logan's voice. It's Friday night and you're sitting in the living room of the mansion with a root beer.
“Yeah, so are you.” You bite back. He just chuckles and takes a seat next to you. Spreading his legs until his knee knocks into yours.
“Weren’t you supposed to go out with that kid, what was his name Jacob or…”
“Jason. Yeah he canceled when he saw the pick up address.” You remember the absolute terrified voice he spoke to you in, afraid you were going to melt his bones through the phone or something.
“You really know how to pick em.” You shove Logans shoulder as he laughs.
“Fuck off, I don’t see you getting any action lately either.”
“That’s because I’m not interested in dating some stranger.” He grumbles.
Truth is Logan hasn't been interested in anyone except for you for a while now. Its been years and as pathetic as it sounds Logan was too afraid to say anything. But there's no reason to mess up a good thing right? Plus it's not like you've been showing any interest in him.
“Look, any guy would be lucky to have you sweetheart, you just need to find the right one."
"Feels like I've been searching forever. Feels like I should make a marriage pact or something." You say with a groan.
"A marriage pact?" "Logan questions.
"Yeah you know, if we haven't found someone by the time we're forty we just, get married."
"We?" Your eyes widen and you start to flounder. The last thing you want is for Logan to think you're a creep or something. It's not like you fantasize about Logan or anything. Totally not.
"Not you, I mean if you wanted to then sure but I was just talking hypothetically you know. I mean god could you imagine you and I?" The words tumble out of your mouth with no filter. You just can't stop yourself. Logan cocks and eyebrow and you pray for something, anything to happen to help you shut up.
"Yeah...hard to picture you and I" Logan's face hardens as he talks.
Like he thought before, you don't want him. You could just burst into flames right here and now. The tension is palpable. Logan has been your friend for a long time but he never fails to make you a little nervous. He shouldn't have this hold over you but god he's just so big and intimidating.
"You know what? We should go out." You say abruptly.
"What? Hey give that back!" You grab the beer out of his hand and he looks at you confused.
"It'll be fun please, I'll buy the first round." You offer and he thinks for a second.
"Fine."
You don't really know what drove you to want to come here. It was loud and crowded and you and Logan had gotten separated after the first drink. Maybe you just wanted to avoid the odd feelings you get whenever you're alone with him. Plus that last conversation was awkward as hell.
You sigh as you swirl your drink around. You spot Logan across the room. He's leaning against the wall while a very pretty red head is all in his space. Your heart clenches as you notice the cocky smile on his face and how he's not pushing her away. Guess someone is getting lucky tonight and it isn't you.
"Hey, couldn't help but notice a beautiful girl all by herself." You look to your side to see a guy slide into the seat next to you. He seems nice enough. He's cute and all.
"Oh I'm here with a friend." You say looking back at Logan.
"Yeah, he seems busy to me. The name's Carter. Let me buy you a drink, no strings attached I swear." He offers. You take one last look at Logan, that woman's hand snaking up his arm. Fuck it.
"Alright deal."
Things since that night have been, a little off. You went home with Carter after Logan had disappeared. Carter was nice enough, at least he was at first. He treated you nice, bought you flowers. He didn't care you were a mutant or that you worked at a mutant school. He was the perfect gentleman. For the first couple months.
It happened so slowly you didn't even notice at first. You spent less time at the mansion, instead now spending it with him. The kids started to miss you and so did your friends but you were happy and they were happy you were happy.
You rarely saw Logan anymore. Ever since you came home from the bar he had been avoiding you, or something. Carter would come by the mansion but his nice guy persona seemed to fade the more he spent with everyone. It didn't help that one of your students accidently lit him on fire once. That's when the fights started.
He didn't trust the kids there, said they were dangerous. He would tell you that he liked mutants but h was worried for your safety. And he really didn't like Logan. The first time the two of them met it ended in a fight on the car ride back to his place. Logan was a strong personality and the two men clashed.
Soon every time your job got brought up it ended in a fight. He'd talk bad about your students, about your friends, about Logan. Carter wanted to keep you away from there because he loved you but they were your family.
He loved you, you had to believe it was all because he loved you. I mean you had spent so long looking for a man who didn't care about your job or your mutant abilities and Carter was that guy. At least you thought he was. You won't find anyone better. Carter liked to say that. It's hard to come by someone who's okay with what you are. So you just had to believe he did it all because he loved you.
"Do we really have to go to this stupid thing? Can't we just stay in..." Carters hand snakes up your leg but you bat his hand away making him huff.
A pissed off look on his face as you drive to the mansion. It was a simple staff party but it had been too long since you got to relax with all your friends. Carter had insisted on coming along but right now you wish he had just stayed home, especially if he was going to complain the whole time.
"This is really important to me. We don't have to stay long I promise." You say in a cheerful tone but Carter just rolls his eyes.
"Whatever." It was exhausting. To Carter anything he wanted to do was fine but as soon as there was something you wanted to do it was a chore.
"Don't understand why you're so obsessed with being around these...people." He mumbles under his breath. Not this again. You plaster on a fake smile as you pretend you didn't hear him. He loves you for who you are right?
The party was in full swing by the time you get in. You greet your friends, trying to hide your feelings as Carter says something about getting a drink.
"You finally made it." You turn to see Logan standing behind you.
"Logan! Didn't expect to see you here." You tease. Parties were never Logan's thing.
"I heard you might show up, can't miss that now can I?" He opens his arms and you don't hesitate to hug him. You missed this. Your nights used to be filled with movie nights and late night snacking with Logan. It's been so long since you got to do any of that.
"Hey, is everything okay?" Logan clocks the fake smile immediately. He's noticed the ways you've changed. You're deflated, tired. It's all that assholes doing and he knows it.
"Yeah every things fine," Logans hands rest on your arms, he's about to press you a little further but Carter comes back.
"Hey man get your hands off my girlfriend." Carter almost seems to puff out his chest as if he was trying to appear bigger than Logan. Logan rolls his eyes.
"Calm down bub, just saying hi to my friend."
"Well she's my girlfriend."
"Yeah she's also a person not a fucking object." Logan growls and you step to get in between the two of them. The last thing you wanted was a fight right now.
"It was great seeing you again Logan." You smile as Carter wraps his hand around your wrist.
Logan reluctantly lets go of you as you're taken away by your boyfriend. He feels this anger burning inside of him. Every time he sees that bastard touch you he wants to rip off his damn arms. Every time he sees your smile fall or hears your fake laugh.
"Jealous much?" Scott comments, a smirk on his face as Logan turns to glare.
"I ain't jealous." Logan snaps as he stalks away.
Yes he is, he's very jealous. He's jealous that asshole is your boyfriend and not him. He's jealous that he's not the one who gets to hold you at night and call you his girl. But he was too late. So he's got no one to blame but himself.
Carter hadn't left your side since your moment with Logan. Normally you'd be happy about this but he was doing nothing but complain every chance he got.
"Can we just fucking go home already. You saw your little friends."
"It's barely been an hour Carter. All I asked for was this one thing! These people are my family would it kill you to try and act interested." You snap, finally fed up with his attitude. He scoffs and crosses his arm.
"I am trying. It's not my fault your family are freaks! Especially that fucking monster." He says with an extra glare towards Logan. Heads start to turn as he raises his voice.
"They're not freaks and don't call Logan that! He is not a monster!" You hiss. You've had it up to here with Carter. Everything you thought about him was crumbling down. If this is what love was then you'd rather be single.
"Of course you come to his defense. What are you fucking him on the side?" He spits.
Logan looks ready to pounce but he's being held back. If he could he'd maim this guy until he's nothing but blood and bones. He doesn't care what insult this guy spews his way but the second he disrespects you, all bets are off.
"He's my friend that's why I'm defending him. I will not let you talk about anyone of these people like that! You are nothing but a hateful asshole. You can go home and don't wait up because you're done."
You're seething with anger but there's a sense of relief that washes over you. You can feel every ones eyes on you but you don't care. You turn around to walk away but Carter grabs onto your wrist.
"Don't fucking walk away from me!" You wince at how hard he grabs you and that's when Logan snaps. Like an animal he's on Carter in an instant. Claws out and a murderous look on his face.
"Get your fucking hand off her before I slice it off." Whatever arrogance Carter had was gone in an instant. He lets go of your wrist and grabs at Logan's arm but Logan is unmoving.
"Listen here bub, you're going to get your sorry ass out of here and never come back." Logan leans in, just close enough that Carter is the only one who can hear his next words.
"If you even think of contacting her again I'll find you and I'll rip you limb from limb." Carter scrambles out of Logans grip and falls to the ground.
"You're all fucking insane." He yells as he runs out the door.
There's a weight that falls off your shoulders the second he's out of your sight. You let out a sigh as you turn to face everyone. Some of them were looking at you with pity and others were happy he was finally gone.
"I am, so sorry for ruining the party."
"You didn't ruin the party sugar, we're glad he's gone. Now we can really party." Rouge says with a smile, you're grateful for her as this breaks the awkward tension.
Things seem to go back to normal but you slip outside, not really feeling a party mood anymore. You hear the door open and foot steps behind you. A root beer is placed in front of you and you gladly take it. Wordlessly Logan takes the spot next to you. Man you can't remember the last time you got to sit down with Logan.
"Thank you, and I'm sorry." You say. He shrugs and throws an arm around you, pulling you closer.
"Nothing to be sorry for sweetheart, asshole had it coming." He takes a sip of his beer and you sigh, leaning a little closer to him.
"How could I be so stupid, things went south way before tonight. I just...didn't want to see it."
"Hey, you're not stupid. You were in love." Love makes you do a lot of things. Turn a blind eye or in Logan's case. Pretend like the feelings aren't even there.
"No I wasn't. Not really. I think...I was so afraid of never finding someone that I latched onto the first guy to give me an ounce of attention." You groan. What's so wrong with wanting to be loved huh? Nothing. But you deserve a guy who isn't a complete asshole.
"There will be other guys, anyone would be lucky. to have you"
"Yeah? Like who?" You say with a snort.
"Like me." Logan says simply. Your eyes widen as you taken in what he just said.
"What?" You ask in disbelief.
Logan shifts where he sits. Fuck this isn't how he imagined telling you, in fact he thought he never would. But Carter made him so angry and he'd be dammed if he let another dick come and take you away again.
"Like me, I want to be the lucky bastard."
"I...Logan how long have you felt this way." You ask, a hand coming to rest on his chest.
"It doesn't matter,"
"Yes it does, please. I need to know how much of an idiot I've been." You beg and Logan frowns, he doesn't like it when you call yourself an idiot.
"Years sweetheart, I've been in love with you for years." He confesses.
All this time. He's been there. As your friend, as something more. Too wrapped up in his own shit to say something at first and then by the time he worked out some of it, it was too late. He hates to admit it but that asshole did one thing right, it pushed him to stop hiding how he really feels about you.
"Logan..." You whisper as your lean in close to him.
His hand snakes around your waist and pulls you closer. Your lips ghost each other for just a moment, before he leans closer and kisses you. Your lips move together slowly. Logan groans against your lips as he pulls you even closer, if anyone were to look outside they'd see you practically crawling onto his lap.
His other hand cups your cheek, keeping you right there for him to kiss over and over. A part of you is kicking yourself for not saying anything to Logan sooner. So much pain and annoyance could have been avoided had one of you just confessed, but the other part of you is too happy to care. Too happy knowing that he felt the same way and that he was finally yours.
"I wish we had done this sooner."
"Me too sweetheart, but you have me now." He says as he kisses you again. A thought lingers in your mind and you pull away from Logan much to his dismay.
"Fuck, I need to get my shit from Carters place." You say with a groan.
"Don't say his name ever again," Logan grumbles and you laugh.
"I'll take care of everything so you never even have to think of that asshole." Logan buries his face in your neck, kissing every bit of skin he can reach.
"Now, lets ditch this party and make up for some lost time." Logan purrs.
God there's so much time to catch up on, you mourn what could have been but Logan taps your cheek. Snapping you out of your spiraling thoughts.
"You alright sweetheart?" You nod, shaking your head free of those thoughts. That's all in the past now, it took a while but you found your way to Logan and that's all that matters.
"I've never been better. Now, take me home."
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lavenders388 · 2 days ago
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hey :) I was wondering if you could do a Dae ho fic, where he and the reader are absolutely oblivious to their feelings and Jung-bae decides to do what he can to push them together (the ultimate wing man) Thanks
~Oblivious~
Kang Dae Ho x Reader
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requested 💌
a/n: this is the cutest request ever:) i love jung bae and dae ho together and this is such a sweet idea! sorry if this seems a bit rushed!! i wrote it before school:3
"during lights out, we should keep watch over the group in pairs." gi hun states sternly. he is met with some mumbled "why?"s, but out of desperation and lack of anything else to follow in the place, everyone has silently agreed to just go with what he says.
as the recorded voice echoes throughout the large, intimidating room you all will call home for the night, you look around to who could be your second for watch duty. you think about choosing maybe guaem ja or her son as they have become the closest to you, closest to friends.
"hey y/n, you watch with dae ho tonight." you hear from the bunk next to you. you look and see it to have come from jung bae, the man who knows gi hun from before the games. you've grown to trust him as well, his genuineness aiding in delivering moments of relief from the awful place you've all found each other in. you notice he's trying to hide a smile.
"okay sure!" you say with a small smile, relieved to know what the plan is for the night as well as to have someone to spend it with. the thought of not being alone relieves your fear massively, and then thought of dae ho being your partner made your twinge.
"may i stay here until it's my turn?" you ask gi hun, referring to your bunk that's across the X side of the room. "yes of course, it wouldn't be safe to walk all that ways in the night." gi hun replies. the reminder of the unsafe situation makes your skin crawl thinking about what could come throughout the night.
all you want is to just go home, but knowing that home wouldn't be much better makes your spirit falter. you've grown to enjoy being apart of your group, the community being something very starkly different than what you're used to. you had a few friends before coming to the game, but you were never super close. they probably haven't even noticed you're missing yet. as the brisk thought of them not having a clue of your whereabouts crosses your mind, you look around to the group who decided they would protect you throughout this before even knowing you. they're all talking amongst themselves, joking and being kind. its refreshing. it makes you forget all about where you are.
you decide that when you're out you wont be notifying your friends back home. you'll take the money and spend your time with the people you're with right now, the people who chose to care for you out of the kindness of themselves.
thinking about this makes you realize how much you don't want to stop spending your time with these people. your thoughts are interrupted by a soft hand on your shoulder. you turn and see dae ho.
you smile at him, and listen as he begins to tell you why he got your attention. "we should stay close together until its time for our watch. would you like to sleep in the bed next to mine?" he says with his normal confidence, all though you notice his voice faltering a bit when he asks you to sleep next to him. "of course dae ho, thank you for asking." you say smiling at him again.
"actually would you guys be okay taking the first watch, it would probably be the safest one." you hear from above you as you see jung baes head poking out of one of the taller bunks. you both agree and get out of bed heading to where gi hun designated the watch point of your little base.
after you get settled, an awkward silence falls on you. "do you really think that people will try to fight us tonight?" you ask dae ho in a whisper, trying to start a conversation but also speaking your worry in a way that might make you feel better. "I'm not sure, but gi hun said that's what happened last time. he didn't say it was every night though, so maybe we'll be okay tonight." he says in a soft but still confident tone. it makes you feel safer, knowing that fighting may not even break out tonight. his voice comforts you as well.
"what do you plan on doing with the money when you get out?" you ask him, looking up at him for the answer. "well first i would pay off some debts, then i think i would buy a house, or even an apartment depending on how much i get. and then after that i haven't really thought of anything." he says with a chuckle that brings a smile to your face. "what about you, y/n?" he asks you. "honestly the same as you. like exactly. I wanna pay off whatever I can and then settle down somewhere. and then I'm not sure." you say to him with a smile. you think its funny you both have the same plan.
"i think thats a great idea y/n." he says to you softly and genuinely. you've grown to really appreciate the way he speaks to you, to everyone. you smile at him again as another awkward silence falls over the two of you. "if you make way more than what you think you will, then what do you think you would do?" he asks sweetly, caring for your answer as well as to dissipate the silence. "I have no idea!" you say a little louder than you should've, with a hint of sarcasm. "i think maybe id get like a cool car or something i don't know." you say laughing at yourself. your laugh makes him smile.
"what would you do dae ho?" you ask him in return. "i might start up a business or something, like maybe a coffee shop or a little market." he answers. you find this endearing. "that's really interesting!" you reply. "that sounds really fun, maybe ill do that as well."
"maybe we could do it together."
he states, his mood shifting from small talk to something more.
"i would really like that." you reply.
"hey lovebirds its our turn to watch." jung bae says laughing with gi hun from behind the two of you. you wonder how long they've been standing there.
as you crawl back into the bed next to him, you begin to hope there was truth in jung baes words.
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whisperofwonder · 13 hours ago
Text
Wife Guy
The wife guys of Haikyuu
(The term does have some negative connotations but I don't mean it like that here. They're just some dudes who really love their wife. Cool? Cool.)
Featuring: Bokuto Koutarou, Iwaizumi Hajime, Sakusa Kiyoomi x wife!reader - ~300 words each
(if someone else needs to be here, tell me. I might write it.)
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BOKUTO KOUTAROU
Come on. He's the ultimate unironic wife guy.
You, his wife, are the light of his life. He adores you. He doesn't shut up about you. Your friends and family know this, the Jackals definitely know this, even his fans know this because he can't resist posting about you even when the social media managers get on his case. The moment your name or the words "my wife" pass his lips, anyone within earshot knows that it's all over.
He never misses an opportunity to tell you how much he loves you. You need to know that, in his eyes, every little thing about you is perfect. Not only that, but he's a really touchy guy. He loves holding your hand, putting his arm around you, barraging you with kisses, any form of skin to skin contact with you. You and everyone around you have gotten used to the constant PDA over the years. He's just so pure and sweet about it that no one can even say a thing about it.
One of the things he loves about being a professional athlete is that it gives him the means to spoil you. Designer items, the latest tech, lush vacations, whatever it is that catches your eye, he's already got his credit card out. He's not trying to buy your love, he's showering you in his. No matter how often you insist that all you need to be happy is him, he can't resist a little treat every now and then.
The day you agreed to marry him was one of the best days of his life. Every time he takes notice of the ring on his finger, a little jolt of joy goes through him, even after all this time. The mere fact that he gets to spend the rest of his life loving you is simply unmatched.
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IWAIZUMI HAJIME
There's a reason that Iwaizumi Hajime (27) Athletic Trainer is written as a knight in every single medieval AU. He's chivalrous, hard-working, and utterly devoted to his wife. He might be quieter about it, but his love for you is an undercurrent to everything. From the kiss pressed to your forehead when he gets up to start the day to the moment he pulls you against his chest in bed each night, there are a hundred little moments when he shows just how much you mean to him.
Most obvious to everyone around him is the small smile that comes across his face every single time he talks about you. "Oh, my wife picked it out." "Yeah, she did make this." "I'm taking her to dinner tonight, actually."
You will never walk closest to the street on his watch. Forgot your jacket? No you didn't, he tossed it in the back seat. When you're washing dishes after dinner, he's right there with the towel to dry. Craving ice cream at 10 pm? The corner store is only a few minutes walk for him, no it's no trouble, don't be ridiculous. It all just goes to show that he's constantly thinking of you - what you might need, what you might want, what might make you smile. If it's within his power, why wouldn't he do it for you? It's just inconceivable.
You make his life better. All he wants is to do the same for you. He might never say it out loud, but being married to you is the fairy tale life he hadn't dared to hope for. Spending every day by your side is enough to make him the happiest man in the world.
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SAKUSA KIYOOMI
His wife is his person. The world is full of irritants, uncomfortable situations, people who rub him the wrong way. You are the one that soothes it all away. His safe space. Coming home to you every day feels like a weight sliding from his shoulders.
He took to the simple day-to-day of married life so well. Dating was never his scene. Truth be told, you've felt married long before he put a ring on your finger. Everyone says the pair of you are the token old married couple. He might scoff, but to him it's the best kind of compliment.
He takes real pride in the home you share together. It's a sacred place that deserves to be kept neat and clean and comfortable. No matter what kind of day he has, he'll always spend at least a little time making sure everything is running smoothly for you, keeping up with the small things that he knows make your life a little easier.
His favorite moments are the quiet ones you share together. When either of you has had a less than perfect day, it's an unspoken rule that you'll be spending the evening together, curled up in your own little world where nothing else matters. Nothing is more comforting to him than the feel of you in his arms, breathing in your familiar scent. Everything else simply melts away.
Marrying you was the easiest decision he's ever made. There was no alternative. In the course of his life, he knows that he's doing something right, because with you by his side, he knows he can face anything else that may come.
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mimipolo · 8 hours ago
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hey :) could you do a nam-gyu fic where thanos is flirting/put claim on the reader, but she clearly like nam-gyu more. just him dealing with his attraction for her, but still trying to be on thanos' good side
Nam-gyu x reader
I don't know if I did this right I had like five different ideas for how it could pan out so I hope this is alright
| ₊˚⊹ᰔ
You were content with the idea of completely ignoring Thanos, his odd claims and even weirder way of flirting. Sure, it was fairly entertaining but it wasn't something you planned to put up with for long.
That was until he walked up to your bunk with a friend in towe. A friend that immediately caught your eye.
"Ayy Senorita!" He draws out in his usual musical tone, behind him a man that looked uninterested, perhaps even annoyed to be there making you grin slightly.
"Aren't ya gonna come down." A whiney voice calls up to you, his face pulling into a frown as he crossed his arms.
"Dude, this a waste of time let's just go." He's still behind Thanos, a hand already on his shoulder, nudging him slightly, hoping to convince him to turn back, and as his gaze went from him to you he stops. The eye contact he made with you was so undeniable you actually looked at the rapper directly for once, startled by how your heart suddenly raced.
"I think I'll stay and eat up here...thanks though." Your refusal immediately has him grumbling as he dramatically pivots to walk away. But his friend hangs back a small moment longer, the brief acknowledgement held a value only you two could fathom.
"Come on Nam-su we outt." Thanos drawls lazily, his arms in his pockets as he swayed from side to side.
"Nam-gyu..." He sighs defeatedly, it was pretty clear this wasn't the first time and likely wouldn't be the last time he'd have to correct the rapper of his name.
Nam-gyu huh? You wouldn't like to admit it but you kept the name close to your mind, maybe he'd favour you for remembering it. Which was a weird thought to have for someone you hadn't actually properly met yet.
You hoped to though.
And he did too, when Thanos was insistent on getting you to eat with them he was almost instantly irritated. Why? What was the point of that? From the beginning he wasn't a fan of any distractions that could lead Thanos away from him, it was inconvenient and if he wanted to win he needed both their focus on that damn cash prize.
What he hadn't prepared for was the you. You who Thanos had miraculously spotted among all the bland people in this weird murder game. And he would never admit it, especially not to him that he understood why he was so hooked on you.
And with that came a jealousy. A deep, seething jealousy that came from nowhere. Now he was frustrated with himself, Thanos and you. And the worst of it all is him actually being just as bummed you didn't come down to eat with them.
| ₊˚⊹ᰔ
From then on there was this tense love triangle between the three of you which Thanos held no part in. You had no intention of making it clear to the man you weren't interested, first of all: it'd be too much of a hassle, and second because of his favour you've been able to survive games you probably wouldn't have. So you'd put up with him, no big deal.
The only thing, no, person making this harder was Nam-gyu. He was also seemingly smart enough to judge it's best to not make any big move as you were both benefitting from being close to Thanos. But it was painfully clear his attention was always on you, his eyes only snapping back alive at the mention of your name during the moments Thanos seems to talk forever. Having to tip toe around the unspoken attraction towards each other was fine by you, exhilarating even. But you're really starting to wonder if Thanos really can't notice when you and the longer haired man only glance between each other whenever he flirts with you.
Apparently the small amused smiles and prolonged eye contact wasn't enough for Nam-gyu. This could end badly if he was caught but he couldn't care less at this point, this whole time it's just felt like the two of you were saying a million things while saying nothing at all. And he'd actually be damned if he let Thanos hold him back from talking to you. He believed you felt the same, it's not just anyone that looks at him so fondly and sees him as an individual. You saw him like he was someone familiar and when he lies awake, he's convinced that's why he's so drawn to you.
Which is also why he's sneaking to see you during lights out. Was this a good idea?
Probably not.
But he'd already climbed past a snoring Avengers threat so he might as well see it through. He sucked in his breath harshly when he heard the familiar snoring pattern pause when he finally made it to the ground. His heart only relaxing when it fell back into rythmn. Not that he was too worried though, he had thousands of excuses on the tip of his tongue. A benefit that came with being a pathological liar.
He is oddly greatful that the majority of the people that were on your bunk had died, the only remaining players being two beds above yours. Meaning he didn't need to sweat about not waking anyone on his way up. As he begins climbing he draws to a question. What if you're not even awake? Even worse what if you are or he wakes you up and you think he's some weirdo. He physically shakes the thought away as he continues his ascent, he just needed to see you, then he'd go back.
It was odd being able to see you so up close, watching the way your chest rose and fell with each breath. Seeing you like this calmed him down and made him want to fall asleep himself.
He freezes when you shift and his hair brushes your nose, your face scrunching up as you waft away the unwanted texture with a groggy hand. Eyes squinting open to see a stunned Nam-gyu instead of a stray price of fluff from your pillow.
What, is he doing here?
You gasp sharply, immediately sitting up and accidentally banging your head against the bed above you in your rush. He's quietly shushing you as you hold your head in whine in pain. You only look back at him when the pain has slightly subsided, hissing one last time before tear pricked eyes meet his.
"The hell are you doing here?"
"Can't I come to see you?" You squint at his words, they pissed you off, obviously he could but you were literally sleeping?
"You came to watch me sleep?" You ask sarcastically, grinning knowingly as he groaned and rolled his eyes.
Seeing as you weren't entirely put off by his night visit he crawls onto your bed fully, catching you a bit off guard but you make no objection against it which makes him strangely glad.
"Thanos isn't any good, you shouldn't be with him." He says bitterly, when you don't say anything immediately after he looks away from you and runs his hair behind his ears.
"...And you're saying you are?" you say with the slight raise of your brow.
You were just fucking around you already liked him more from the moment you saw him. Long disobedient hair and an angular face and a surprisingly sharp tongue when provoked. Ticking most of your boxes, you just wanted to see how he'd respond.
"Nah... but I could be better, than him at least." He says with a small huff which makes you laugh slightly, and he immediately notes he's never heard it before.
"I'll see you to that." Your words make his heart seize up but in the way when he's won when he didn't expect to. The carefree act he had going was going to crumble if you kept being so casual with him.
It's only now he feels the tensity of the situation, sitting in your bed in an area mostly secluded. He was actually feeling nervous being around you without Thanos there as some barrier to the two of you. You're looking at him expectantly as if waiting for him to make some smart ass response but you're so pretty right now. Your eyes on him and him alone. He's keeping quiet because if he spoke as he was now... he couldn't promise he wouldn't immediately embarass himself.
Instead he looks between you and the wall, his eyes scanning your face each time before he looked away. Despite the chaos of feelings reeling from inside him his face was mostly unreadable. The only thing telling you anything was his jaw tightening and loosening, maybe chewing the inside of his cheek.
You tilt your head to see if he'd look at you if you were more in his line of view but he only locked eyes with you for a moment before looking up.
He was nervous?
The thought made your chest swell even though you knew he was probably just deep in thought. Either way your fighting back a smile as you take his face in your hands and place a soft kiss on his lips. It was honestly amazing how he came back to reality from the contact. Staring at you with wide confused eyes as if questioning why you would even do that.
And when you start to laugh to yourself quietly he's chuckling flustered beside you. His lips pursed tight to not let the grin on his face appear, but his feelings were clear in the new softness in his eyes.
Nodding lightly like he's fully savoured your presence he's manoeuvring himself to leave your bed, giving the underside of your knee a light squeeze before settling on the ladder.
"G'night..."
"Night Nam-gyu."
The first genuine smile of the night freely slips onto his face, making your own smile appear before he's making his descent back down. Grinning to himself like an idiot all the way back to his bed because he managed to get the girl Thanos saw first.
| ₊˚⊹ᰔ
Ever since then it's been this mutual joke between you two. You're holding back a snicker as Thanos serenades you because Nam-gyu's right behind him rolling his eyes and mocking him.
Nightly routines of him visiting your bed comforted you on those nights you couldn't will yourself to sleep. There's been more than one occasion he's stayed the night and forgot to go back to his bed and when questioned about where he was so early in the morning it's always "Needed to piss". He's glancing back at you accusingly as if you forced him to stay (you asked repeatedly very nicely.)
I love him sm I'm gonna cook him into a lasagna.
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pretty-little-mind33 · 2 days ago
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Hello! 😊 I absolutely love your latest Pietro headcanons. 💙 Only if think if it’s no trouble, (and because I love sharing thoughts with you about it) what would you think about headcanons of Tony Stark’s daughter being in a relationship with Pietro? It’s completely up to you. Have a good one and take care! 👋
~ hi! i can def write some headcanons! it helps with my writers block 💕 plus i adore stark!reader hehe! hope you enjoy! ~
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• as Tony Stark's daughter, you choose your boyfriend's very carefully. they have to be a certain way to appease your dad lmao (and you have high standards)
• Pietro Maximoff starts off as the exact opposite of the boys you would usually date. you know he's the last boy your father would approve of so you keep your feelings hidden, eventually convincing yourself they're feelings of hate.
• Pietro knows he should hate you. you're Tony Stark's daughter. he pretends he does, enjoying the little game you both have, but in reality he knows he doesn't (mostly because Wanda very quickly knocked some sense into him haha)
• you both bicker and banter. Pietro constantly sets little pranks for you. harmless ones that only annoy you.
• Tony notices the exchanges very quickly and he knows exactly what's happening even before you do!
• he doesn't approve of Pietro but he wants to understand. so one day he corners Pietro and demands he explain why he's all over you.
• at this point, Pietro's hatred for Tony has dwindled, and he's not intimidated by him. he'll tell him plain and simple: "I'm in love with your daughter."
• Tony will be a little taken aback by his boldness but will smirk and let him go with a warning to be careful around you. you don't look it but you're fragile.
• one night, at an Avengers party, everything changes.
• you brought a boy from your uni class and Pietro is fuming. he can see that boy doesn't treat you right; he doesn't dance with you when you ask, or hold your drink, or tell you how beautiful you look. Pietro is angry you've chosen that over him.
• so he'll excuse himself from his conversation with Clint and invite you to dance. right in front of your date.
• you're a little shocked but you'll take any escape at this point so you take Pietro's arm and he leads you to where some guests are dancing. it's not a slow dance but Pietro keeps himself close, asking why you would date someone so pathetic.
• his tone is harsh and you're conflicted. he's also so close you can barley breathe, let alone think. butterflies erupt in your stomach.
• you bite back a snarky answer, which causes Pietro to chuckle and he leans in, his lips near your ear.
• "You don't really think that, do you, Princezna (Princess)."
• one thing leads to another and you end up in the hallway, kissing Pietro like your life depends on it.
• for the first few months, you keep your relationship secret— or so you think.
• all the Avengers know you're dating, even your dad, because Pietro can never keep his eyes off you. he's extremely protective, especially on the field so he keeps you safe.
• Tony waits for you to tell him. he can see that Pietro is good to you, so he doesn't want to risk your unhappiness by messing this up. he loves you more than he loves his pride!
• eventually, you do tell your dad and he's just smirking because he already knows.
• once Tony is on board, you and Pietro date publicly. you're like a power couple!
• you still bicker and banter, but now lovingly. you move into the same room in the tower, much to Tony's dismay, but you're an adult he can't stop you.
• Pietro likes being around you. he loves taking walks and holding your hand, or just sitting and lounging around next to each other. he usually has a hard time being still, but he really tries with you!
• you're like peas in a pod 🥺
• a very unlikely couple, but you work perfectly! and you're good teammates too! you like training together!
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kawhh · 2 days ago
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Thinking abt Quinn and someone who lets him take control over certain things in the beginning. Planning dates? Go for it, you're new to the area and don't know where the good places are. Cooking dinner? Love a man who can cook! Helping with your skincare routine? Amazing bonding especially if Quinn lets you put a face mask on him too! But.....you're a bit stubborn for the rest of the things. Wanting to keep your job. Your apartment. Pay your own bills....etcetc
I apologise, nonnie. I woke up in a darker Q mode.
You lull him into a false sense of security at first - his possessiveness is soothed by you letting him plan and control everything for him.
He can make sure you get proper food in you. He can balance every single ingredient that goes into you. Knows it's all done by him and that you can't get sick from some other cooked food. He trusts a few restaurants and small grocery markets that he's used for years but anything else going into you is a gamble.
Dates? He knows where to take you to make sure he has the most alone time with you, places where it isn't crowded. He wants your attention on him.
He doesn't realise you aren't as accommodating when it comes to bills and jobs. And why do you protest against moving in with him? Do you think he can't provide for you? Why does he need to lose hours of you to work? What if someone is a creep in your workplace? What if you spend more time with your co-workers than him?
if you aren't at his apartment on top of spending time with co-workers, when does he get to see you? No, no, it's not enough. Anything could happen to you when you're not with him. At least he has ways of watching you at his own place when he's away.
If he can't convince you - he'll just have to.. force the situation.
He's cancelling your cards. Now you can't worry about rent and bills. He has enough money to throw at processes to make them cancel anything of yours himself.
Anything you need, he can simply buy or subscribe to himself. That way he can even keep an eye on what you're watching or doing.
He won't fully get you fired from your job - that'd distress you too much and might cause more problems for you. But now you don't need the money for everything else do you? You can work part time. He can work through that. He can track you, make sure he knows when you're at work and when you're leaving.
He'll make up excuses to get you home faster. He might even give you some drowsy medicine that forces you to call out sick. He can't drive you - he has practice (even if he doesn't. He'll drive around the block until you know you're stuck without transport)
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winterchestnut · 8 hours ago
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Pardon the SOBBING.
Someone on love and deepspace twitter mentioned that "Caleb is for the only child daughters," but they also included eldest daughters.
Caleb is for the ones that grew up with no one to rely on, who grew up and matured too fast, and ALONE.
As a guy who had lots of half-siblings (one of my parents decided to have too many kids *bombastic side eye*) and never grew up with any of them, BUT I was considered the most mature out of my cousins and subsequently had to take care of them when my older teenage cousins and the adults decided to fuck around and abandon us, that hit hard. Like
"Wdym, Caleb is openly giving me someone to rely on? Who's practically BEGGING me to call him when I need something or someone?¿?¿¿ When it's my turn to ask for help after years of "I dunno, you figure it out." Now, it's my turn to be sheltered and taken care of by someone who has been in love and obsessed with me since we were kids?¿¿?" Bc, I Am Tired. Like, "Sorry, mom and dad I'm not the perfect Asian child that wanted to become a doctor."
This bitch even notices when we have a little booboo on our finger. From a photograph.
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I know I'm laughing and joking around with Caleb's whole lowkey yandere🤪theme, but I wish someone irl were this forward and caring for me.
And one more thing, someone responded to me that they like to immerse themself into MC and that they feel like they can "be themselves" with Caleb (bc MC very much has her own personality and she acts slightly different with each LI), compared to with the other LI's where they felt like they need to be more badass, more clever, more snarky. And I felt that. I like Rafayel, but I'm genuinely not an optimistic person who can keep up with him. I like Sylus, but sometimes I don't want to "handle it" and be MORE than who I am now. I like Zayne and Xavier, but I wholly understand that I am a toxic person and they don't deserve to take the brunt of my mental health.
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marvelandponder · 2 days ago
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I'm gonna speak from my experience and it's probably going to be different than OP's and that's okay
I had super bad social anxiety from about 10th grade through most of university. I straight up believed that if I didn't have anything "worthwhile" to say, it was a burden to say anything at all, because then you'd be subjecting people to a painfully awkward social interaction they didn't want
So basically everything I had to say wasn't "worth it" and I felt like I was failing every social interaction, or cowarding out by hiding myself away when it became too exhausting
I think over the course of those years I had about 4 or 5 therapists?
Each was helpful for different reasons but the one that was the most helpful was a guy who had me write out what I believed about socializing. And we picked them apart until we got to the underlying truth
The one that really stuck out to me was we basically got to a point where he was like "so you believe human beings are inherently judgemental"
That didn't feel right. Like, yeah, we have automatic passing thoughts, but most people don't really care about what's weird with others for more than few seconds. Then they're focused on themselves again
So that stuck out to me as a belief I could revise. Where were examples of when people didn't care about me being awkward or not knowing how to socialize?
We devised a plan to test the new theory
I was in university at the time, and there were scheduled meet ups in our LGBTQA+ centre's on campus. That seemed like a pretty safe place to try things- I had even been there before
So I went. I went a few times. It was still tough sometimes but I started to feel more safe saying things, contributing to set discussion topics, or just being quiet when I didn't have anything to add (and not beating myself up for having nothing to add)
That built a little bit of confidence, then I had a few job experiences that helped too. At first those sucked - I would have panic attacks sometimes. But then around the time I was doing this therapy, I got one where I could tell my managers first thing, hey, I've got anxiety, this is what it might look like if I have a panic attack. And I didn't have a single one that term, or the term after.
I built up confidence just by reinforcing my new beliefs that people really weren't as hyperfocused as I was. I became more social - I had a cubicle of three other students around me, so I joined in on their discussions and even had a good time
Fast forward a few years, I'm now more comfortable and confident in any social situation than ever. I call with friends every week, I go out with my partner and do all sorts of stuff together, I have this huge community of people around me in all kinds of capacities!
I'm not you, and what worked for me isn't gonna be what works for you. Also? It's valid as fuck to not be in a place where you can at all comfortably socialize with any human beings at all, and to be there for so long that you just straight give up. Or maybe it's all you've ever known
That's fucking valid and you don't need to feel ashamed for it. And also, in my personal experience as someone who couldn't socialize without anxiety for several very formative years, people can become social
Doesn't mean you have to, or that one is better than the other. I'm just saying I was in a big doomer place before about my own ability to socialize and if I was talking to my past self, she'd be so fucking relieved to hear that things get better and she doesn't have panic attacks about talking to people anymore. She actually likes it
people are way way too generous in assuming that you can just “learn to be social” and everyone will welcome you with open arms and forgive you forever for all the years you spent not talking to people. sorry no. if you don’t start out social you never get the opportunity to become social. people assume that’s just how you are and treat you accordingly, and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy
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