#now i can go back to reading without feeling guilty...for 2 days

[bbyquokka]

blow me instead?

– “Why should I blow out the candles, when you can just blow me instead?” prompt

pairing | lee felix x gender-neutral reader

genre | smut – 18+ is strongly advised!

cw | established relationship ; dom felix ; oral sex (blowjob) ; finger sucking ; cum swallowing ; deep throating

words | 2.6k ~ ( 2,693 ) + 2 fake texts !

notes | a lil smth for felix's bday. jisung's will be posted at a later date when i've finished it :( don’t forget to leave feedback, reblog and tell me what you think here. i hope you all enjoy! ‹3

m.list — wips list — you can also read it on my ao3

dont repost. dont translate. minors, ageless & default blogs; dni! feedback and reblogs are highly advised and appreciated!

you forgot. you’ve forgotten the most important day of the year and you are currently kicking yourself for it. it’s felix’s birthday, the one day of the year that you look forward to every single year – but for some unknown reason, this year you forgot.

maybe it’s because you’ve both been really busy that you haven’t given it a second thought. you’re always well prepared for things like this, but this year it slipped your mind.

you knew you forgotten something but you couldn't tell what. you had that nagging feeling in the back of your mind but you pushed it to the side. “i’ll figure it out later” you always told yourself only to forget – once again.

it wasn't until the day before, did you looked at your calendar and see ‘15th sept’ circled and decorated in hearts, labelled ‘felix’s bday!!’ did you panic. that nagging feeling quickly turned into a sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach. worry and panic washing over you and coating your skin in a cold sweat.

it was way into the night to go to the store to pick something up. everything was closed. you thought about making him something but realised that you don't have the materials to do so. so a quick search on the web was your last resort. you hoped you could find something that would do next day delivery but alas, after several hours of searching and drawing up blanks, did you accept your fate.

you woke up the day of his birthday, feeling guilty and it's eating you alive. you don't think you'd be able to face to him without bursting into tears.

“i should at least wish him a happy birthday.” you mumble. you take your phone from the night stand and open up felix's contact. your thumb hovers over the green circle. 

you hesitate. lips pursed together. you overthink. you can hear his sullen tone of voice. you can see his facial expressions twisted into sadness. your heart aches and feels tight, like someone is gripping onto it.

“fuck. i can't.” you throw your phone onto the bed beside you, watching it bounce from impact before rubbing your face with your hands and groaning. “maybe a shower will help me. i’ll call him then!” 

you didn't call him. in fact, you spent the whole day avoiding him. you did pop to the store and buy a small box of cupcakes and some candles. you had this idea of surprising him by turning up at his place with a fancy birthday cake, thinking it's better than nothing,  but when the store only had cupcakes to offer, that idea was quick to fizzle out.

the cakes are now sitting on the counter, untouched and unopened. you're in your lounge wear on the sofa, TV on but you're not tuned into whatever show it's playing. instead, you're on your social media, looking at what felix has been up to the whole day.

pictures of felix with chan, jisung and hyunjin. birthday wishes from friends and family flood his profiles. you're glad he's had a good day but that guilt just won't go away. 

you've shamelessly avoided him the whole day because you couldn't face him. it's cowardly of you and you know it, but in a way, you just shut off.

you rush to your feet. your sock covered soles slapping against the floor as you rush to the door. you open it and come face to face with a not so pleased looking felix.

'“i see you're still alive.” you swallow. he sounds irritated. he's angry at you and you don't blame him.

“felix, i–”

“are you going to let me in or are we just going to stand out in the hallway?” he cuts you off. you look down at your feet and shuffle to the side, opening the door wider for him.

he walks in, kicking off his shoes and hanging up his coat as you close the door behind him. he notices the unopened cupcakes and pack of birthday candles by the side of them.

“so?” he starts as he looks at you. your chin is tucked into your chest, fingers fiddling with one another. you feel like a child about to be told off by a parent.

“i'm so sorry, felix.” you start, keeping your eyes glued to your feet. you don't want to make eye contact with him because the guilt of forgetting is eating you alive. it's making you feel incredibly nauseous.

“for?” his arms crossed against his chest as he looks down at you, brow raised. his authoritative and dominant aura seeps out from his pores and clouds you, suffocating you in the process.

“... i–uh…” you start, words lodged in your throat. felix lets out a small, irritated sigh. “I forgot about your birthday.” 

your voice is small and cracks. you furiously blink back the tears that are threatening to spill from your lower lash line.

“you forgot?” you nod slowly. “is that why you've been avoiding me?” you nod again. “why?”

“because i thought you'd be angry at me… like right now.” felix runs his fingers through his hair slowly.

“i’m not angry that you forgot. it happens. i’m angry because you avoided me on my birthday.”

“i know.. i’m sorry.” you look up at him and chew your bottom lip. the cupcakes catch the corner of your eye. you rush to then, opening them and the candles before sticking one in the middle of the cake.

felix follows you and watches you with eager eyes. his gaze suddenly feels hot. he licks his lips as he admires your body, eyes flickering up and down.

he's undressing you with his eyes. 

you turn around, holding the cupcake in your hand with the candle flame flickering. you present it in front of felix and smile.

“i got you cupcakes though. i know it's not much but i couldn't find anything on such short notice…” felix simply hums and looks at the cake, then you. “are you not going to blow it out?” you question after some seconds pass.

felix leans in close. his lips brush against the shell of your ear as his voice drops and becomes low and deep. his warm breath fans against your ear as he speaks.

“why should i blow out the candles when you can just blow me instead?” 

goosebumps ripple along your skin. your heart suddenly starts racing. his breath feels ticklish against your ear, body temperature suddenly rising

“f-felix!” you squeak as he pulls back, finding amusement at your shocked facial expression. 

“i assume you didn't get me a gift so i can consider a blowjob as one. and if you do a good job, maybe i’ll let you off the hook for avoiding me on my special day.” 

“i–” you swallow a little, the heat from the candle is radiating onto your chin, adding to the increase of your own body temperature.

felix keeps his brow raised before trailing his hand down his torso to his groin where he squeezes and groans softly.

you can't take your eyes off him. you watch his hand squeeze and palm himself through his jeans. his veins bulging from his hands and arms. 

he kicks his head back a little, lips parting and giving you a view of his outstretched neck. his adams apple bobbing with his swallows. soft moan and grunts leaving his parted lips.

“don't just stand there.” his deep voice brings you back down to reality. “blow me.”

you place the cake down on the counter (after you blow out the candle) before kneeling in front of felix. he looks down at you. his dominate aura making you feel small and vulnerable but excited.

you can feel the pit of your stomach tingle and bubble with excitement. warmth coating your groin. the tips of your fingers and toes feel electric from the surging feeling of excitement that's mixed in with hormones.

you reach up and slide your hands up and under his t-shirt. his warm skin hugs the tips of your fingers. the sturdiness of his abs flexing and tensing with his stomach moving in time with his breathing.

you feel his smooth skin, tracing his muscles with your fingers. the only thing that isn't smooth, however, is the small, yet noticeable happy trail that runs from his belly button and disappears below his jean waistband.

“mhm..” felix hums softly, your touch giving him goosebumps. you move your hands lower until they come into contact with the rough fabric of his denim jeans.

you look up at him, asking for permission with your eyes to which he gives with a nod of his head.

you unbutton and unzip his jeans slowly, revealing that he is wearing black designer boxer shorts. you notice how his bulge is slowly, but surely, getting bigger with each passing second as he anticipates and waits.

you pull his jeans down to his knees. you press the palm of your hand against his crotch, massaging him slowly. he huffs. his cock twitching against the palm of your hand.

you give him a few gentle squeezes. your touch is too gentle for his liking so he looks down again you with glossy eyes.

“harder.”

you oblige by wrapping your fingers around his clothed length and squeezing, hard. his hips buck slightly and a soft, deep moan falls from his lips.

you feel his warm hand pressing against your cheek as his fingers graze along your jawline before bumping against your bottom lip.

he slowly strokes your lip, chewing on his own. 

“look at me.” you look up at him, making eye contact. two of his fingers nudge between your lips, gently pushing past them as you part them.

“good.” he whispers as his fingers caress your tongue. your brows furrow together, lips wrapping around the two digits as you suck. your saliva coats felix's fingers thoroughly whilst he pushes them further into your mouth until they're fully encapsulated in the warmth of your mouth.

the hand that around his clothed length has slowed down and is now loosely gripping him. your groin feels hot and excited, tingles in your stomach as felix explores the inside of your mouth with his two fingers before pulling them out slowly.

he gives a satisfying ‘hm’ before instructing you to continue with the nod of his head.

you whimper a little and reach up with both hands, grabbing the waistband of his boxer shorts. your fingertips brush against his hot skin, causing felix to shiver and huff in excitement.

you slowly pull down his underwear, revealing his happy train and v-lines slowly before his erect penis is revealed, bouncing and twitching at the sudden cold air hitting his hot shaft.

felix lets out a small breath of relief. the feeling of being restrained is no longer an issue. his hips buck slightly as you wrap your hand around the base of his shaft, stroking it slowly.

you watch the man above you slowly crumble. his penis twitching, pre-cum leaking from his slit. his shaft is hot against the palm of your hand, tip red and a few veins protruding along the sides.

your hand glides up and down his penis, rotating at the top. you use the pad of your thumb to gently rub his tip, smearing the pre-cum and making his tip glisten.

the sensitivity gets to felix. his hips rocking a little in your hand against his will, thigh muscles noticeable twitching. his head flops to the side slightly, half-lidded eyes looking down at you and watching your every move.

you lean in and lick the side of his shaft a few times before pressing your tongue against his tip and swiping it several times. his salty pre-cum coats your tastes buds, making you feel more excited.

you rub your thighs together as the heat in your groin is unbearable at this point. you're desperate for some sort of friction and attention but you're too into pleasuring felix. with the way felix is right now, you know he is going to be selfish and chase his own high.

your free hand cups and caresses his balls. felix hums softly as you roll and squeeze them gently in your hand whilst kitten licking his tip.

“c’mon, baby. you know i need more than that.” 

you close your eyes as you wrap your lips around his tip. felix shudders and huffs a little, his teeth digging into his bottom lip. you gently suckle on his tip, swirling your tongue around it a few times before slowly lowering your head and pushing more of him into your mouth.

the corner of your lips feels stretched, mouth stuffed. you try to make your jaw slack but even that is a struggle with how thick and long felix is.

you struggle to put half of his length in, settling with a little under. you can feel his tip bumping the back of your throat and saliva is quick to accumulate in your mouth.

felix huffs and puffs, body shuddering and twitching. he reaches down and runs his fingers through your hair a few times. 

you start to bob your head slowly. your hand stroking what your mouth struggles to reach. the head and hand move in synch with each other, providing equally, if not more, pleasure to felix.

he feels the pleasure rushing through his veins and burning. his toes curl against the floorboards and his grip on your hair tightening with each suck as a way to keep him stable and grounded.

“...fuck … baby, m-more..” he pants.

you oblige, increasing speed and intensity. felix's moans become more intense and breathy. his body and mind failing to comprehend the intense feeling of warmth and wetness from your mouth as well as the coolness of your palm.

“... oh fuck.. yes… so fucking good…” 

this just encourages you even more. you remove your hand and place them both on his thighs for stability. you push your head further down his length until you can feel it down your throat.

you hold back your gag reflex, swallowing a few times to tighten your throat around him. felix lets out a string of incoherent moans and whispers. 

your jaw hurts. your lips hurts. your knees hurt and you can't breath but listening to felix whimper and crumble makes it all worth.

you feel him twitch in your mouth. his hips thrusting involuntarily. he's a mess and he's close.

his balls are tightening and his body is coated in a thin layer of sweat. the sensitivity of his cock head is overbearing. 

“don’t stop.. 'm close..” he struggles to say between his moaning. his strangled moans mix in with the sloppy, wet sounds of your mouth. 

he lowers his head, chin tucked into chest as he whimpers. a string of “fuck” leaves his lips as he grips onto you. it doesnt take him long. his cock twitches in your mouth, hot fluid coating your tongue and throat.

felix whimpers and whines, huffing and puffing. his body twitches and jerks. you help him ride out his orgasm before slowly pulling away. 

you look up at him, making eye contact as you swallow. felix shudders and strokes your swollen bottom lip, saliva collecting on the pad of his thumb.

“you did good, yn.” with felix's help, you rise to your feet. the numb feeling of pain on your knees becoming more noticeable now that your legs are outstretched.

“does this mean i’m forgiven?” you mumble. felix nods and strokes your hair gently.

“sorta.” you look at him slightly confused. “my birthday isn't over just yet, yn.”

“true… so, what do you want?” 

felix takes you by the hand and drags you to the bedroom. he gently throws you onto the bed, stripping himself of his clothing as you lean on your forearms and watch.

“i want so much more.” he purrs as he crawls onto the bed, towering over you and kissing the shell of your ear.

“i’m a greedy man, yn. you should know that a blowjob is not nearly enough to satisfy me.”

[kittysoonie]

Notice me

Ceo!Wonwoo x Fem!reader - 1.8k words

you finally have your boyfriend all to yourself but what's the point when he's too busy staring at his phone to even look at the ruby necklace you put on for him?

Established relationship, Non-idol au, angst (happy endings tho) and smut

ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ

You’re seated in a crowded restaurant, as the laughter and excitement of other customers fill your ears. It’s a surprise that you don’t happen to feel the same way as them, it’s your first date with your boyfriend after almost three months and he won’t even look in your direction; his eyes glued to his phone ever since you both sat down in your seats. You play with the food on your plate, huffing out of boredom.

“Wonwoo…” You start and he replies with a hum without even looking up.

“You know the ruby necklace you got me last year from Greece? I’m wearing that today, how does it look?” You ask, half excited in hope that he would look up at you for once tonight.

You felt a little disappointed with yourself, practically throwing yourself at your boyfriend in attempts of catching his attention since the night started. But, to no avail, he replied without even looking up, “It looks gorgeous babe.”

You furrowed your eyebrows as you began speaking, “Wonwoo could you look at me? You haven’t put down your phone since the date started…” your voice becoming smaller by the end.

“I’m sorry honey, the deal is just about to close and if all goes well we can finally go on the vacation you’ve been planning for a while now.”

You could only sigh in response, you know that he’s doing it all for you. He’s loyal, handsome and so loving, it almost makes you feel guilty for stripping him away of his time while he’s so busy. You’re just thankful he’s even sitting in-front of you during such a stressful week but, there’s still a part of you that wants all of his attention to yourself.

After another ten minutes of silence and both of your foods being left untouched, you decide you’ve had enough and message your personal driver asking him to pick you up.

It's not like your absence here would make such a big difference.

In the next 15 minutes your driver is here and you slowly get up and leave and even if you were expecting it, you still feel hurt when you realise your boyfriend hasn't felt your absence yet.

You walk with your head down and sit down in the car, weakly asking your

driver to take you back home making sure he can't hear the silent sobs leaving your mouth.

When you reach home you immediately run to your bedroom, taking off your heels that you put on just for wonwoo and wiping off your makeup - it's all ruined anyways.

You check your phone after a while, once you've finished your skincare and are comfortable in bed as a way of getting your mind off of your awful night.

Wonu💗: ???

Wonu 💗: where did you go?

2 Missed calls from Wonu💗

Wonu 💗: I'm coming home, we will talk then.

And as you read the message simultaneously you hear the front door unlock and wonwoos footsteps inching closer to your shared bedroom. You quickly turn your back towards the door so he can't see your heartbroken expression.

"*Y/N?" He calls out resulting in no response from you.

"Baby I know you're awake, don't ignore me." He adds on with a sigh, reaching out to rub your back softly.

You hesitate a little before looking up to him, eyes swollen with tears.

"Baby talk to me...what happened?" He asks and you feel like crying even more about the fact that he's so unaware about his actions.

Did he not feel as alone as you? Did he not miss you? Maybe he found someone new?

All these thoughts crossed your mind and as if he could see the cogs moving in your brain he continued, "Don't worry yourself all on your own, please...talk to me" he was basically begging.

"All night wonwoo.." you started as he urged you to continue

""You ignored me all night wonwoo. I understand that your work is important and every day you work hard for me...for us..."' you add while he takes your fidgeting hands into his own.

"I know you had to clear out your schedule for today and I'm thankful that you did but, I guess I was just expecting your full attention on me. I even wore your favourite dress tonight in hopes that you would give me all your attention and i don't know...I guess I was just being silly." You finish as you carefully look up to see wonwoos furrowed eyes brows as if he's trying to make sense of everything you said.

Getting a little embarrassed, you take your hands away from him and cover your face, "ugh I knew it, it's just all so silly..I'm feeling like a high schooler again" and to that he chuckles as he urges you to look at him again.

"I'm sorry baby.." he starts as you look at him with watery eyes.

"'You're not being silly at all, you're right, I cleared out my schedule to be with

you, you're not silly for expecting my full attention on you. I'm sorry that I

haven't been here for you, I know you've missed me I've missed you so much too." You carefully nod as you take in everything he's saying.

"I promise, I'll take the entire next week off. We can go wherever you want,just us two, no business calls whatsoever!" He finishes with a small attempt of enthusiasm as you giggle while he pulls you on his lap - both of your legs wrapped around his waists.

And almost immediately, his lips are on yours and what started as an innocent apologetic kiss turns into something a lot more intense.

He swipes his tongue over your lips as you open your mouth, inviting his muscle inside as your hands reach out to grab the back of his neck.

He pulls away with saliva connecting both of your mouths and you look at him meekly, grinding yourself onto him in objection to the sudden loss of contact.

He chuckles deeply as he takes his glasses off while having a bruising grip on your thighs, preventing you from pushing yourself onto him even more as a wet patch grows visible on your sleeping shorts. You lean in to give him gentle yet harsh kisses on his neck that will most likely leave a mark that he will most definitely complain about tomorrow morning before going to work.

""Wonu.." you whine as your hands make there way to unbutton his formal shirt, which he immediately stops.

You look up at him with the best puppy eyes as he gently pushes you on your back, connecting his lips with yours again.

"Hmmm...need all these off.." he thinks out loud, pulling your shirt off.

"No bra?" He asks with a raise of his eyebrows and you whine in embarrassment, covering your chest.

"What's so embarrassing? Nothing I haven't seen before." He says with a smirk as he goes in to suck on your left tit while his hand plays with your right nipple.

"Wonu.." you gasp, "not fair.." you can barely even speak, "you're fully clothed and 'm basically naked." You finish with a whine.

"Well, we gotta do something about that don't we?" He asks teasingly as your hands once again make there way to unbutton his shirt, successfully taking it off this time. He reaches out for your shorts that he takes off with your underwear in one go, cold air hitting your soaking cunt.

You watch as he spits on your wet core and inserts two fingers in one go, erupting a loud moan (it was basically a scream) as he chuckles. "Aww look at my baby, she's been so desperately waiting for me hasn't she? Soaking wet.."he adds with a slap on your cunt as you buck your hips, trying to be as close to him as possible.

"Yes! Yes! Been waiting for you!" You squeal out as Wonwoo smirks in satisfaction. "Been wanting you for so long!" You add on with a moan.

"Don't worry baby, I'll give you all the attention you've been craving." You moan once again as he attaches his mouth to your clit, sucking on it like a starved man.

"Wonuu 'm gonna cum.." you furrow your eyebrows, focused on your orgasm.

"Cmon baby, be a good girl and come for me."

The nicknames puts you on edge as you come with shaking legs.

"Baby.." you whine as your hands are in the air, reaching out for your boyfriend.

"Want you now.." you continue as your eyes fall onto his growing bulge and he raises his eyebrows at you.

"Yeah? You sure?" He questions in amusement, thinking you would be too tired to continue.

"Yes! I waited for sooooo long." You whine.

"Well if my baby waited so long for me then who am I to say no?" As he lets down his boxers for the first time tonight. You're basically drooling at the sight of his cock as it hits against his abdomen.

"You're ready baby?" He asks and you enthusiastically nod your head in agreement which he chuckles to, "words baby."

"Yes wonu I want you, I want your big cock inside me pleaseee" you beg and he thinks he might just cum at this moment.

"Fuck...princess" he moans as he sinks into your drenched pussy, legs touching

his shoulder as you're basically folded in half. He thrusts, slow and deep into

you, grabbing your hand into his, leading it up to the bulge in your stomach."Fuck, you feel this princess? This is how deep I am into you." You gulp at the feeling of his bulge.

"Faster" you whine and he complies.

"Shit 'm about to cum wonwoo" you barely let out.

"Oh yeah? me too princess where do you want it?" He asks while sweat drips down his forehead.

Almost immediately you respond, "inside, inside Wonwoo please, need to feel all of you." And who is he to deny his pretty princess.

You both basically shake during your orgasm as he slows down, pulling out and you swear right now he looks like the most beautiful man you've ever seen.

He rolls onto his side, pulling you close to him as your sweaty bodies become as physically close as they possibly can.

"Feeling good baby?" He asks softly, stroking your hair away from your sticky forehead, a different demeanour compared to literally five minutes ago.

You shyly smile, "uh huh, I feel so good."

And even though it's dark you can basically feel all the heat in his body rush to his cheeks.

After a few minutes of silence he speaks up again, "I gotta clean you up baby and the sheets are all messy we need to change them."

You whine at the thought of moving from this comfortable position.

"Just five more minutes." You whine

"Siri set the timer for 5 minutes." He says with a grin.

"N00000000"

ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ

Read more of my work: Masterlist

[erenjaegerwifee]

Summer In Pandora 🌸 Day 2 - One Bed 

Paring: Lo’ak x Fem!Omatikaya!Reader

Warnings: MDNI 18+, smut, explicit language, p in v, orals (f receiving), jealous Lo’ak, friends to lovers, mentions of courting, passionate sex, Lo’ak feeling guilty and in love, sensitive Lo’ak, body worshipping, sweet aftercare

Word Count: 3.5k

Index: ma kalin - my sweet, sevin - pretty.

Disclaimer: All my characters are aged-up! If that makes you uncomfortable do yourself a favor and scroll, don’t bother reading or interacting with my account, thank you!

main m.list | event m.list

You decided to have a sleepover with your best friend and everything was going fine. You played board games and got into little arguments about how much rent you owe Lo’ak while playing monopoly. You played pranks on his brother while he was chilling out in his room.  

Everything was seemingly normal for a sleepover. Your parents never seemed to care that much when you and Lo’ak would spend time together. They knew well Lo’ak was your closet friend and you liked being around him so sleepovers were not an uncommon thing. You both were never without the other growing up so nothing would change now. 

Even though you have both grown into adults, both exceptional hunters and both single, it was never really an issue to be around each other. It’s not that you haven’t noticed the way Lo’ak would glance at your chest sometimes staring a bit too long. Or the way you would admire his chiseled abs when he would pull back his bow to shoot his prey when you were hunting. No, you were well aware of how hot he was and vise verse, but you never though it would be an issue. 

That was until tonight when you crawled into bed with him after a long day and then some of your playing around letting your limbs stretch out into the comfortable blankets. Lo’ak jumped onto the bed bouncing you up slightly as he looked down at you, “Awe are you tired already eveng(girl)?” he teased you as he seemed to not be tired at all. 

“You’re all talk bitch, when your head hits the pillow, you are gonna be out like a light, it happens every time.”  you look up at him smiling at the thought. “Whatever...” Lo’ak replies while he lays down next to you, “Wanna watch some TV?” he asked you. 

A couple years back, he had a TV installed in his room with movies downloaded on it for this reason specifically. Lo’ak never liked watching T.V alone, he always wanted someone to be with him usually opting between his brother and you, “Aren’t you tired?” you say with a yawn. 

“No but I take it you are, are you getting old? You never go to bed this early” his comment made you laugh. “Oh Lo’ak, I’m just an adult, it sucks but at least I get to have sex so” you shrug watching the TV as he flips through the selections. Lo’ak pauses immediately he felt like his brain lagged, “Sex? You are having sex? With who? Why didn’t you tell me?” he started off and turned his body to you. 

The TV now long forgot, the remote sits beside him as his attention is directed at you. The faith glow of light makes him look beautiful, his freckles shine in the dark but at the same time they don’t. You find yourself tracing the pattern on his face, something that was unique to the na’vi, no one is alike in this way. But Lo’ak was even more special with his extra fingers and toes. Some people may think he is dangerous because of his human feather but you like it a lot. Lo’ak has done nothing but protect you in all the time you have known him, not one day since you knew this man have you felt unsafe. Even though he can be quite reckless, he never has and never will put you in a position to get hurt, and it is not just something you know, it is something he has told you. 

“With no one specific, and I don’t know, I didn’t know how you would take it. You never told me when you had sex, if you did, I still don’t know” you answer him. You lay in your back and turned your head to the side on his pillow looking at him. Lo’ak’s entire body faces you and his head is propped up on his wrist and he watches you, “Ok fine is that what it’ll take? I had sex with, you remember Nila? She was my first time, then a couple more chicks after from the Metakayina clan.” his words upset your stomach but you ignore the feeling.  

“Well when you and your family when to the metakayina, I was lonely and it just happened, after that it never happened again” the sully family had only been with the metakayina clan for about a month. After they were attacked there Jake realized it made no sense, they run away from home is the sky people will find them where ever they go, he didn’t want to put people who do not know war in danger. So at least they decided if they stayed in the forest the Omatikayan are strong. They can fight for their own.  

“Your moving so sudden Lo’ak I was very sad watching my best friend leave with the rest of your family that I love every much.” you try to explain but he stopped you, “with who? Who did you lose it too ma kalin? His voice was soft, almost a whisper and his gaze doesn’t falter, “Adrik, we went to a party and met up there and I was feeling a bit awkward and he stayed with me so I wouldn’t feel uncomfortable. The next few days he’d spend more time with me and he was sweet, but when he requested to court me, I declined, it was the day before you came back home.” 

Lo’ak didn’t say anything, he just took in your words. Yours eyes started to flutter as you drifted away to sleep waiting for his response. Lo’ak watches you drift off to sleep right in front of him but his brain didn’t even process it. He admired your features but he wasn’t thinking about that, no. 

Lo’ak was thinking about how you fucked someone else, his entire life he stayed by your side and the moment he leaves you fall into bed with another man. He doesn’t blame you though, it natural you were alone and someone took advantage of your kind and submissive nature. It was his fault, he should have never left you. Maybe then you would have fallen into bed with him. 

Lo’ak didn’t mean to sleep with those other girls, after Nila he realized how much he really wanted that to be you and he regretted it ever since. When he left for the metkayina he wanted to take you, but he didn’t want to put you in unnecessary danger, no matter how much you cried for him to take you. That was the first time in his adult life he actually cried, it was because he left you.  

Now here you are sleeping comfortably in his bed, looking gorgeous as ever after you told him he made you lonely, “baby no I’m sorry...” Lo’ak whispered, scooting his body closer to yours. You had already fallen into deep sleep but it didn’t stop him from waking you. His large palm rested over the blanket on your hip shaking you slightly while calling your name.  

Lo’ak’s head came down to your neck, he rested his head on the pillow behind yourself and pushing his head into your skin meeting it with his lips. He kissed and whispered into your skin, “wake up kalin please” his voice was strained, desperate, “have to tell you something.” when your stir your body and open your sandy eyes you don’t see Lo’ak, you feel him. 

His body was pressed up against yours even though he’s bigger than you, his feet almost hang off the bed as he finds solace in the feeling your skin, you listen to him sweetly ask you to wake up so he can talk to you, you feel his hands squeeze your hip but they don’t really move from the spot, only to shake you. You feel his breath kiss your neck, the coolness that settles every time he inhales and the heat you feel when he exhales.  

“Lo’ak” you whisper and his head whips up to look at you, his body shuffles up so your lay face to face but he didn’t pull back to give you space, he stayed pressed up against you, “I’m so sorry I left you kalin, I should have fought harder for you to come with us, I am sorry” his apology catches you by surprise. “Lo’ak you do not need to apologize for that it is okay you are back-” 

“No but it is not okay, it’s my fault you slept with him, your first time shouldn’t have been because you felt alone, because I left you alone, I’m sorry, I’m sorry” Lo’ak cut you off desperately trying to win your forgiveness, every pause in his sentence he kissed you on your cheeks, both sides got equal love he even kissed the corners of your lips at one point, it was like he wasn’t thinking straight.  

“I shouldn’t have slept with those girls, I’m sorry they weren’t you, when I left, I searched in every girl for even a little sliver of you but no one was the real thing, I’m sorry you had to find comfort in someone else I promise I’ll never leave you again.” you take in his words, not fully processing but you tried to find a way to understand.  

“Lo’ak want are you trying to say?” your voice comes out a bit mean but you don’t think anything off it. He does though, he pulls his lips away from your face to look at you, his ears are pinned down as he looks into your green eyes due to the dark room. Even though his are almost the same shade, Lo’ak thinks yours are so much more beautiful. The slight difference in your eyes makes it all the more beautiful in his opinion, he has never seen this color on anything in his life, no plant, flower or vine has ever come close to how beautiful the shade of green your eyes are.  

You seem to finally process how mean you sounded and brought your hands up quickly too his face, his hands were still situated around your waist, and the rest of his body was still pressed up against yours except for his face and chest, “wait, I didn’t mean it like that, you just- you woke me up apologizing for something I have never blamed you for, I want to know the reason is all” you pull him closer and rest your forehead to his. 

Lo’ak sighs into your touch, your voice is so soothing to him, he could listen to you talk all day. He closes his eyes and takes in your words letting them resonate with him, you don’t blame him, he shouldn’t blame himself. Lo’ak raises his head from yours and looks you in the eyes, “I- I love you; I was waiting for the right time to tell you but I don’t think any time could be better than this, holding you close to me, in bed, this is all I want for the rest of my life I love you” his words are nervous but you couldn’t have been happier hearing them.  

“Oh Lo’ak, I love you too-” he doesn’t wait for you to finish your sentence, just pulling you close, kissing you on the lips. The action surprises you but you don’t push him away only melting into the feeling of his soft lips. You only break the kiss to get some air and again he tried to kiss you almost immediately. It makes you giggle how sweet he looks wanting to kiss you so bad, cute blush on his face as he looks at you, “Patience Lo you will get whatever you want, but first I wanna know what brought this on” you tease him. 

Your hands run down his neck to his chest and back up, you watch him close his eyes feeling your touch and it makes you giddy, you’ve never seen Lo’ak look so fragile before, it is quite loving to see him relax with you into such a state, “I made a mistake, you shouldn’t have slept with him, I wanted to be the one to do that. I know it sounds selfish and you had every right to do what you did but I can’t help but feel like if I was still here, it would have been me”  

His words make you melt, “It is not your fault. Do not blame yourself you can still make me yours; it was only one time and if I’m being honest the only way I got through it was thinking about how much I wanted it to be you...” you voice is soft, shy as you confess to him, you lean towards him and press a soft kiss on his nose. 

“Let me make it up to you” his words are almost slurred and his blush deepen from the kiss. Before you could protest Lo’ak slide his was between your thighs flipping your loincloth up exposing you to him. You try to close your legs but his big body stopped your movements, “Please, I promise I’ll make you feel good, please let me get a little taste”  

His words make your cunt gush, you hoped he wouldn’t notice to way you got wet so easily but it didn’t matter much when you gave into him nodding your head for him to touch you. “Want to hear you say it kalin, tell me you want me down here”  

This man is down bad for you and you both know it, the thought makes you clench around nothing, “Want you Lo, make me feel good” your voice comes out as a softly but he hears it, not wanting to wasting anymore time he licked a stride up your slit sucking on your clit, you weren’t expecting it to feel so good when you agreed but damn he is amazing, you don’t want to think about where he learned to do this so well but it benefits you entirely. You whimper and feeling his tongue glide along your wet folds and flicker at your clit, it doesn’t take long before he throws you into your orgasm making you gush in his mouth. Lo’ak is reeling between your thighs as he shoves his head in deeps almost disappearing from your view when you clench on his tongue repeatedly, he doesn’t waste a drop. 

When he licks you clean, he raises his head panting, his lower face is messed up with your essence making you turn your head from him shying away. Lo’ak chuckles as he watches you blush and bite on your middle finger glancing at him. He kisses and sucks his way up your body leaving marks on your thighs, hips, abdomen until he makes it to your covered chest.  

“Can I take it off please?” his voice is so sweet but you let him do it anyways. He wastes no time getting you naked after he got your verbal confirmation. Lo’ak takes a minute to admire your bare body before him, his hands run up and down your slim, sexy waist thinking about how soft your skin is, how amazing you look in the dimly lit room, he sees everything so clearly as if the sun was shining down on you. Thats a thought, imagine having you sprawled out naked in the forest taking his cock, he can’t wait for all the fun that comes with being in love with you.  

He snaps out of his thoughts when your hand reaches down to palm him in his loincloth noticing the obvious bulge. Lo’ak groans when his feels your hand squeeze him, “wanna make you feel good too Lo” you bite your lip looking at his strong figure above you, your voice was soft but not a whisper you wanted him to hear how much you wanted to please him and he certainly did.  

“Fuck baby, you’re just perfect aren’t you, wanna suck on my cock for me to feel good...Eywa you really are fucking perfect aren’t you.” he doesn’t move your hand from his covered cock but brings a hand to stroke your hair sweetly. This man just had a way of making you feel submissive for him, his hand runs through the strands of your hair petting the top of your head occasionally. You looked up at him with such lust, you want him so bad, “yea Lo, wanna be good for you” you say sweetly looking right at him. 

Your words make his cock jump under your touch which in turn make you giggle while you look at him, neither of you have broken eye contact yet when he bends his body over yours brining his lips down to kiss you sweetly on the mouth. Lo’ak makes you swoon in that kiss, when he pulls away you raise your head chasing his lips. 

“Kalin, as much as I wanna feel this sweet mouth on my cock, tonight is about you. Tonight, I want you to have everything you deserve” his voice is calm, soft but steady, you know he means what he is saying to you. Lo’ak removes his hands from you and unties his loincloth letting his harden cock bounce freely in the air. The exposure makes his hiss and he strokes it slowly.  

You watch him pump his cock in his hand, he is huge, a little on the thin side but his cock was still thick and the length...he was so long you think he could possibly touch the inside of your belly button. He lines up his cock with your slit pushing in slowly, his gaze shifts from your tight hole taking him in and your screwed up face. He feels the way your small cunt stretches to accommodate him and he drops his head on your collarbone when he bottoms out, “Fuck kalin, did you- are you sure you’re not a virgin? You are so fucking tight” he mumbles into your skin. 

“You-you’re so big Lo-” your voice stutters and he’s not even moving yet, you definitely boast his ego but you sound so good talking to him like that, he almost cums in the stop. He knows what you are trying to say, he understands but he wants to hear you say it, “Hmm, you think so sevin?” he raises his head to look at you watching you bite your lip and nod your head. 

Lo’ak pulls back giving and experimental thrust and when you moan, he swears he hears paradise. Lo’ak takes it as a sign to set a nice pace for it, it’s not too fast but enough to make you mewl out for him. Your arms come to wrap around his neck pulling his down to meet your lips. Lo’ak doesn’t want to muffle your sounds he wants to hear everything, but he just can’t resist his sweet girls asking for a kiss.  

When his lips touch yours your body stutters, you clench on him unintentionally making him moan into your mouth. Lo’ak quickens his speed feeling the way your lips no longer kiss him, your sounds travel from your mouth to his, lips touching sweetly as you tell him how good you feel. “Yea? Feels good? You feel so fucking good too baby, clenching on my cock like that, you’re gonna make me cum”  

His words send a jolt of electricity through your body, his lips travel down to your neck sucking on the sweet spot that makes your legs weak. You whimper loudly into the air when you feel your orgasm creeping up on you. “Lo- Lo’ak wanna cum!” your voice is pitched another octave when you speak to him, “Cum baby, wanna feel you cum in my cock, doing so fucking good for me, such a good girl, cum for me” Lo’ak groans when you gush on his cock clamping down in him tightly.  

He follows right behind you pulling out and aiming to cum on your stomach, but his cum shoots out landing of your naked tits. The cool air makes your shiver as you come down from your high. You watch him pant above you as if he’s so worn out now, he drops beside you on the bed reaching for his discarded loincloth to clean up your body. Not that he would be needing it now.  

Lo’ak sits up dipping the cloth into some warm water then swiping it on your cunt, the feeling making you flinch but welcome the feeling when he pulls away and you’re clean again. You never thought he’d be one for such aftercare but here he was surprising you again.  

You yawn cutely catching his attention and he crawls into bed next to you tossing the cloth aside. He pulls you close your back against his chest and he kiss your shoulder and neck whispering how good you did for him, how amazing you felt, and sweet compliments that would make you blush if you weren’t so tired. You drift off to bed in his strong arms listening to him tell you how much he loves you, you really couldn’t have felt more loved than you do in this moment.   

🌸 I hope you enjoyed reading! I had tons of fun on this one! Please don’t repost, translate or copy my work onto any other platform

🌸Reblogs, comments and likes are always appreciated

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[r0-boat]

May I request some Yandere Von lycaon headcanons please? Thank you! 💗

Hot wolf headcanons coming right up

Yandere Von Lycaon Headcannons

Cw: Yandere, possessive, excessive,and overprotective behavior, super controlling, super toxic, kidnapping.

Von Lycaon knows every little thing about you down to the last beauty mark on your skin. He is a hyperstalker, MF has a leather notebook filled with meticulous notes on you. Along with pictures photos or sketches to go with it. He takes such great pride into knowing every little thing about you.

He wants to know your likes your dislikes everyone you hang out with your family members, He will know you down to what soap you use.

First he was just happy with stalking you knowing everything about you but after a while he would want more. You would start bumping into you on the street slowly starting to hang out with you. And as a handsome and very charismatic wolfman you will be in tranced too much so to even notice what's going on before it's too late.

You will be kidnapped, He had to do it as soon as he could and it's not like it was hard either He had stolen things before. He was rusty but once he knew your schedule and how to get you alone it was so easy to lead you with stray.

Lycaon is not stupid. He knows what he's doing is wrong. You are his guilty pleasure and he cannot help himself. at first he was very conflicted and holding his feelings back but now he does not care.

he assures you that him being your captor is a better option than literally anything else out in the world. With his salary he could easily provide for you then when he is not working you are his one and only. If you know your place, he will happily serve you and give you anything you wish.

Just because he serves you that doesn't mean he's a pushover. Far from it He's only like this because he wants to serve you However he is not afraid to take back what little control you thought you had.

Of course, obedience is not without punishment, and as a strict wolf, he must uphold his rules. And there are a lot of them.

-Supervise internet for 1 hour only, of course certain social medias are blocked and restricted.

-Going outside without his chaperoning is prohibited

-wondering around the house when he is at work is prohibitive However once you're good you will get this privilege.

-You must eat meals by him and him alone Von lygon will provide three meals a day along with snacks and dessert He shall leave warm breakfast out for you before he leaves for work. His Bangboo shall provide you with lunch.

-no tempering with the Bangboo, it's there for your safety surveillance and to provide You with any necessities while he's away.

-television for no more than 2 hours a day. Anymore then 1 hour over this limit and you'll get a scolding. More hours maybe negotiated.

-any books or TV series you want to watch or read must be checked and green lit with von Lycaon first

-hanging out with friends is out of the question unless greenlit by Von Lycaon.

-when he calls you must pick up immediately.

-do not feel yourself up on snacks and sweets. You'll spoil your dinner.

Honestly he doesn't think he's that controlling.

Von Lycaon had a connection set up cameras in your room and everywhere around the house, which was attached to an app on his phone so he could see what you're doing at all times.

Von Lycaon Will cook for you cloth you, bathe with you, He would even goddamn brush your damn teeth for you.

Your Butler by force may look common collected but internally he has no chill when it comes to you and will clear out grocery stores when you even mention you have a craving for any snack or dish.

He is self-aware but he is still delulu from the fact that he wants to get married to you someday. It will happen You just have to trust him more. In one of your many fights with him You yell at him that "You can't force someone to fall in love" and with a straight face looking you dead in the eye he answers " you can love someone by force that's called Stockholm syndrome. I researched that extensively"... You never had that argument with him again.

[becomingmina]

FUCKBOY MIN 2. little series w/ LEEKNOW + HYUNJIN

18+ ONLY! MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!

pairing: hwang hyunjin x female reader x lee minho genre + warnings: slight angst wc: 3.5k mina's note: I really enjoyed writing this. Sorry it took a while! This part was was like a filler, I know.

other works here ; any comments and thoughts you can drop them here ; ty for reading.

series chapter ➵ part one, part three ending one

“You done crying yet or?” Hyunjin jokes after watching over you for the past thirty minutes. He was in the drivers seat handing out countless tissues to you, who was in his passenger’s.

“Hyunjin, stop,” you crack up at his teasing. You were done crying now, you just weren’t done being upset yet. A heavy feeling still lingering around your shoulders as you try your best to block out Minho’s words circulating in your head.

“Are you still not going to tell me what he said to you in the bathroom?” A hand comes to wipe away the last of your tears, his tone gentler now.

Hyunjin can see the marks on your neck, anyone can. He can tell what happened in the bathroom and he knows Minho must’ve said something to overwhelmed you to cry, but he just doesn’t know what exactly.

“I don’t want to re-live it Hyunjin,” you couldn’t tell him. You didn’t want to tell him that you said the L word to Minho within the same month you got rejected by him. Hyunjin could never judge you for that but how can you tell him without telling the whole thing, how it was forced out of you. Dirty? Dirty because of Hyunjin? The words repeats again, haunting you. Hyunjin was involved in Minho’s mean and hurtful words and you feel guilty. Hyunjin did absolutely nothing wrong, he didn’t deserved to be dragged into whatever mess was going on between you and Minho.

“Why? Is it because you might cry again?” He playfully says, not wanting you to feel downhearted at your own actions. He lets out a giggle after observing how you quickly pierced your eyes at him sassily - something you picked up from him. It doesn't matter what situation you're in, Hyunjin always makes it light hearted. He's so playful but in a way where he is still careful and you never fail to warm up to him. Just like this moment.

“I just got my heart broken by the city’s fuckboy, I don’t need the city’s heartbreaker to feed into it,” you chuckle and he follows with furrowed brows, unable to keep a straight face at the names.

“Those names are crazy Y/N,” he remarks.

“I actually don’t think you’re a heartbreaker Hyunjin, it’s just what everyone calls you,” you reassured him, hand finding his to give him a tight squeeze.

"I probably am one," he held yours back tighter, letting you know he didn’t take it to heart. "I'm curious though," he continues .

“Hmm?”

“Curious to why the city’s fuckboy keeps yelling at you,” you eyed him again, arms crossed this time with a fake pout. “Or is it that you’re just a cry baby?” he laughs but he was serious though, he wanted to see why Minho keeps leaving you in tears.

“I’m not a cry baby,” you defend yourself. “You’re probably tired of me crying hey? I know how to smile too!” To be fair, you were kind of a cry baby especially as this is the second time he has picked you up and wiped away your tears, all within a month.

“Wait, can you actually?” he continues.

“I’m actually really sweet Hyunjin, I promise!”

“How about the city’s heartbreaker takes you out one day?” The tension from the incident with Minho start to disappear as Hyunjin slowly soothes it, directing your attention somewhere else - something he is very good at.

“Hmm?” brows furrowed together. His question had taken you by surprise, you were unsure if he was serious. “Like on a date?” You clarified.

“Mhmm,” he confirmed. “So you can show me how sweet you can be and that you’re not just a cry baby.” He already knows how sweet you are. Last couple of weeks you guys spent together talking about everything and nothings have really shown him what type of person you are. You were caring, cheerful, playful. You loved to tease, loves to be teased and takes on jokes like a champ. You were just full of laughter and happiness and meeting someone like you is hard for Hyunjin. It seems that he has developed a soft spot for you, but unlike Minho he isn’t afraid to show you.

You just giggle back, unaware of the thoughts going through Hyunjin’s head, everything falling into silence right after.

Hyunjin is a lovely person and you hate to say yes just to distract yourself from Minho. But Hyunjin has that effect on you, where he has made you forgot about Minho whenever you’re with him. You don’t know how to explain it. Like earlier tonight before all of this, when you went with him to the party, you had zero care for anyone and anything besides Hyunjin and wine. Or like right now, Minho was slowly fading away in your head. If you give him a chance, maybe he’ll be better than Minho. He always was, seeing as he was the one who was here, unlike Minho who didn’t even chase after you.

“Hyune?”

“Hmm?”

“A date with you sounds cool,” your silly smile returning. He couldn’t control his smile back, his eyes turning into thin lines as his upper lips disappears a little showing his white pearlys.

The man who broke your heart an hour ago long forgotten, in moments like this.

+

“You okay hyung?” Han asks, after observing Minho for the past hour just downing his drinks.

“Yeah.. Good.. I’m good.” Minho could barely reply, slurring on his words clearly intoxicated.

“What happened in the bathroom? What did you do to her?” Han was worried about you both. He still doesn't understand what you did to get Minho to push you away like that, especially when Minho would used to reschedule his plans with Han and their friend group just to be with you. It was clear to Han that you guys had something going on. Minho wasn’t much of a drinker too but seeing him suddenly finish all these drinks made Han sense something was up.

“Nothing, I just.. Nothing just shooed her away like usual,” Minho replied, acting uninterested in the conversation.

“Marks on your neck tells me otherwise,” Han replied back, eyeing up at his hyung. Minho doesn’t reply, instead he stays quiet, one hand coming into contact with the marks you left on his skin. His head is in a daze, the scene of you pressing kisses to his neck, how soft your plump lips felt, your tiny hands holding the back of his neck to keep him in place while the other was wrapped around his..

“Hyung? Hey hyung?” Han snaps the older man out of his thoughts, holding him by the shoulder trying to steady him. “She’s a good girl. If you don’t like her don’t do that to her.”

“She gave me the marks Jisung.. I didn’t do anything to her,” Minho huffed, trying to defend himself.

“Sure, it’s not like she didn’t walk out of the bathroom with marks herself,” Minho just rolls his eyes. “If you don’t like her like that, stop hurting her.”

“Looks like you also want to fuck her, seeing as how you’re talking about her-”

“-Just because I feel sorry for her doesn’t mean I want to fuck her, hyung. No girl should be treated like that,”

“Whatever,” Minho pushes the smaller boy’s arms off his shoulders making him stumble back a bit.

“See how you act? You’re a dick. How is it that every other girl gets let off easily when they admit they like you and when Y/N does it she gets yelled at?” Han was over his hyung’s antics, also fuming from the way he was pushed even though he was only trying to help him up.

“Last month you pushed her away then tonight you’re all over her again just because she’s with someone else. You’re so possessive. What did you do to her in the bathroom?!” Han has never called Minho out like this but the way Minho acted was very possessive. It was like he hates seeing other people interested or talk about things that was his. In this instance, you.

“I don’t know,” as much as he hates to admit it, your words engraved itself to his brain. He couldn’t come up with a reason why he treated you the way he did tonight or ever. Just the words I love you bouncing in his head, hitting every surface of his brain. Did he like you back? He’s not in-love with you right? Or was he just possessive over you? Did he want you to himself only? Minho was overwhelmed with his thoughts, unable to voice anything else, eyes just seeking some sort of help from the younger boy.

“You okay hyung?”

“No.”

+

A couple weeks go by and Minho catches himself thinking about you every second pf his day. He doesn’t know how to make it stop. He contacted so many girl just to ghost them before they meet up as he has this feeling of guilt. Not towards the girls, they don’t mean anything to him but guilt towards you. It was like he was doing something wrong to you. But you weren’t even his and he doesn’t even like you back. He has just be constantly in and out, and his friends aren’t any help either. Well to be fair, he’s only been keeping his thoughts to himself so it’s not really his friend’s fault. But you and Hyunjin has been the topic of the week, updates of where you guys went or what you guys did was brought up every single day in conversation.. well ofcourse it would, seeing as how Hyunjin and Minho shares mutual friends.

“You think he really likes her?” Felix asks the others.

“Yeah, if he didn’t he wouldn’t have come with her to the party the other week,” Chan clarified and they nod in agreement.

“Why wonder we haven’t seen him all of last month, he was with Y/N.”

Minho listens to the conversation, quietly contributing and attacking Hyunjin in his head. Yeah but she doesn’t like him. She clearly loves someone else.

“Wasn’t she one of your flings?” Chan’s question wakes Minho up.

“Hmm? Y/N?” Your name comes out more tender than expected from his lips. “I don’t remember,” Minho lies.

“Anyways, I reckon the photo he took of her from earlier this week was cute,” Seungmin says, the rest giggling like high school girls at their friends love life.

“Looks like the heartbreaker Hyunjin found someone he really likes.”

“And Y/N seems to really like him too,” Minho was furious, wanting to tell them what the reality was but even himself wasn’t sure if it was true anymore. Maybe you have fallen for Hyunjin. Maybe you have forgotten all about Minho now.

He looks to his side, watching Felix swipe through Hyunjin’s instagram story. It was the first time he saw you since. You were as pretty as ever. Hair in a half up half down look, in a black dress looking and smiling at Hyunjin’s camera.

Hyunjin had taken you out to one of his favourite bakery and art museum. He had told you to wear something pretty, and be ready by noon. You got dolled up, picking out your most gorgeous dress and by the time he promised, he messaged you to come outside. Hyunjin was lean up against his car, his camera strap across his body, a small bouquet in his hand. It was something you never experienced before, you couldn’t help but smile instantly at the sight. Oh how sweet he was, and definitely very handsome.

“You look like you can be very sweet, Y/N,” he playfully says before pulling you into a hug. You hold him back, arms wrapping around his body pressing your cheeks against his toned chest, staying there a little bit longer than you extended.

“Ready to go?” He asks, and you remove yourself.

“Mhmm, ready to go and ready to show you I can be sweet!” The conversation you had with yourself, a couple days ago still implanted in your head. You will give it a try with Hyunjin. He has always treated you well, despite his title he received from everyone, but a little part of you is afraid. Minho treated you well too, but turned his back on you the second you liked him. You were afraid you were going to fall for it again. Hyunjin could never make you fall for him then ditch you right? But to be honest, has Minho ever picked you up in broad day light like this? No. You guys would sneak around all the time, and was only ever relaxed in a closed off area - that being his house. Minho has never planned a date this. But did your heart wanted that more than this? A unlike tingling heavy feeling fallen in your chest, the feeling is different.

As Felix continues to tap his screen, more images of the date appears. You guys spend a while in the coffee shop just goofing around with each other, then at the art museum.. Oh the art museum.. countless photos of you standing infront of and looking at the art works makes Minho go red.

“Fuck-” Minho bites, fist forming into balls as he feels his blood boiling. Minho was angry now, he was jealous. He didn’t ever show you off like this and was mad someone was able to do.

“Gotta go, gotta go call Bella,” Minho walks out, everyone else looking around trying to seek a reason why he was acting like that.

+

It was dark and late, 9pm to be exact. Silence fill the air as you and Hyunjin both just sit in his car. You shyly glance over to him, unsure of what to do now, he just gives you a smile. You really enjoyed your day with him, it was fun and quite the romantic day. But do you invite him in now? Do you take it slow? What would you do if you invite him in anyways?

"I enjoyed today with you too Hyune," you break the silence. "I'm actually really tried from everything though" you lie, you needed to distant yourself for the rest of the night, to work out what you were feeling. You needed to take it slow. The tingling sensation before was still around you, a feeling you can't explain. "I think I might start ready for bed," you observe his reactions, but there is none. Just him keeping a small smile like earlier.

"We did so much today, I’m tired and ready for bed too," he agrees, one hand reaches over to hold yours. He was so soft, it's like he knows the barrier you had set up. He doesn't questions it and just lets it be.

"Thank you Hyune," you reply, twisting your wrist so your fingers can interlock with his now, giving him some sort of affirmation. You lean in towards him and ahe air grows a bit cold now. You had to do it, to show your gratitude. You continue to move in, giving him a peck to his cheeks. Hyunjin freezes in return, the sudden affection makes him flustered. "Goodnight Hyune." You retracted back your hand, collecting your stuff, along with your nice bouquet of flowers and exiting his car.

It was clear to Hyunjin after the peck that he liked you. He really liked you but he was still unsure of where your feelings stands. Regardless, he wanted to keep trying with you.

+

You were in the middle of the dance floor, to the grand party that Hyunjin asked you to be his date at. Well technically, you were invited by Minho's mum but you can't turn down a cute date with Hyunjin.

“Where are you?” You ask on the phone, eyes searching for a lost Hyunjin. He has disappeared from your sight so suddenly after you guys had spend a hour of drinking the free wine.

“At the table we were before," you can hear him slurring on his words, unable to keep your giggles in at how tipsy he is.

“Okay, coming! Stay where you are," as you turn around someone pulls you back, making you stumble a bit forward into them.

“Can I talk to you?” You encounter a familiar face. Minho was standing in front of you, his hand gripping your wrist not painfully but strong enough for you not to pull back. Your eyes scan his face. He looked so different. He had his hair down covering his forehead, something he never wears out in public. His eyes were coated with a thin cover of gloss, almost looks like he had been draining in his emotions for the longest time ever. Minho looked so soft, you were taken back.

“I gotta go. Hyune’s waiting for me,” you reply trying to pull away from him. You needed to avoid Minho, unsure why but you had too.

“Hyune?”

“Yes, Hyune,” you managed to escape and walked off, only because he loosen his grip. Minho was left on the middle of the dance floor, watching you make your way through the crowd.

“Hyune?” He whispers to himself, confused. A nickname already? Maybe the boys were right.

You don’t know why but a sudden urge to spin around got the best of you.

“Hey Min!” The nickname makes him instantly turn around but he knows it wasn’t going to be you standing there, so he prepared himself for whoever was there.

“Hey, I was looking for you,” he lied to the gorgeous woman infront of him, Bella.

You watch as Minho smile at her, his hand coming in contact with her cheek. You spun around again, not wanting to watch any more of what he got up to, going back to Hyunjin.

+

The music was blaring now and you feel yourself getting light headed from the countless shots and mimosas you consumed. You lean into Hyunjin’s chest, wanting to stay still for a minute to regain control of your body.

Minho doesn't know how he got here but there he stood a couple steps infront of you, watching you with Hyunjin. He has Bella in-front of him holding his hands as she sways to the music, seeking for his attention.

“Hey, I’m losing you here Y/N,” Hyunjin laughs, although him himself was feeling the same thing. He had to control it, he couldn’t let you both loose to alcohol.

“I’m so tired Hyune,” you replied, unable to move your head from his upper chest.

“You wanna go sit down?” He asked, hands coming to your waist to help hold you up. The small contact with your body makes you widen your eyes. You steady yourself back on your heels as you make eye contact with the sweet boy in front you. Your eyes catch his lips for a second, they were so plump, so full and the perfect shade of pink, almost a reddish. A thought ran through your head and you feel guilty about it but you wanted to do it. You want to feel his lips on yours to confirm that feeling that keeps staying around in your chest. His eyes flutter from your eyes to your lips. You looked so pretty like this, your cheeks was pink, eyes looks so bright and full, you were so kissable. Hyunjin slowly leans in, one had holding your face and when he doesn’t see a signal of you avoiding it, he closes the gap between your lips.

Minho’s heart sinks watching Hyunjin kiss you. He has always been possessive of you, hating when your attention is on another person. He has always been annoyed, always been angry but right now, he feels broken, he feels hurt. He didn’t come here with Bella because he liked her. He came here with Bella because he wanted to use her as a distraction. He wanted to use her to get over you. He doesn’t realise it until now, after witnessing the kiss, that since the night you confessed your feelings to him, he felt the same. He felt the same but he was too afraid to say it, to show it. Liking someone was overwhelming, let alone loving someone. Minho was just afraid.

The feeling doesn’t go away, it’s heavy it’s numbing your body. You pull away from Hyunjin’s lips, hands on his chest to help you detach. You can’t keep his eye contact, letting out a heavy breath.

“Hyune, I..” you look up over his shoulder and catches Minho eyes as he towers over Bella. Minho stops to observe you, observing your next move. For a second the world stops, everyone’s face was blurred, the music goes from blaring loud to a long beep, something you hear when your brain restarts similar to the sound in movies when the main character watches someone close to them die. It was only you and Minho.

{Tag list 🏷️@20minsat180dgegrees : @feybin : @whosanaanyway : @k0nst3nceee : @hoes4lino : @ihatewritingshit : @armystay89 : @redstayrosie : @captainchrisstan }

[janeyseymour]

When There Is Love, There is Life... pt 2

I had a few ask for a part 2, so here it is! I hope it's worth the read!

Part 1

WC: ~2.9k

Valentine’s Day had come and gone, and you meant what you told Melissa when she figured out that you were the secret admirer behind all of those gorgeous flowers that she received for the holiday. You are willing to wait for her- she is absolutely, 100% worth it to you. There is no doubt in your mind that Melissa Schemmenti is worth waiting for.

So you’ve been waiting for about two months now, and you entirely understand that these things take time. You’re in no rush.

Honestly, nothing has changed between the two of you since you confessed your feelings for her. The two of you still innocently flirt with each other. You’re there for her, and she’s there for you. She still brings in extra portions of her lunch for you, sometimes you spend your evenings lounging on her couch and drinking wine. She still stays with you during preps and any other opportunities the two of you have to spend together throughout the school day. When teachers are allowed to go home, the two of you walk out together.

It’s nice, it’s simple, it’s warm. It’s exactly what Melissa needs in order to continue to heal her heart from the breakup with Gary, and you are more than happy to be there for her in any way that you can be.

But lately, Melissa’s been thinking: it’s you. It’s always been you. Sure, Gary was fun and she could’ve stayed with him for the rest of her life, but… you’ve always been there. You’ve always acted as more of a life partner to her than Gary ever was. Even if it was just platonic at the time, she couldn’t shake the feelings that she had for you, no matter how hard she tried. When she told you that you were a big reason that she didn’t want to get married and officially broke it off with the vending machine man, she was serious.

It’s been two months. Two months. There was no rebound for her, and she certainly didn’t want to make you feel like a rebound. But two months is a long time, and she thinks she’s ready to start getting back into the game… get together with you.

But when you made this beautiful gesture to her, the redhead knew that she had to make a gesture that equaled your initial efforts. You’re worth it.

The flowers that you had given her all had meaning behind them, and she loved that. She actually pressed quite a few of them before it was too late so she could keep them forever. She’s planning to put them in resin to keep them on display forever. 

So she decides to take a page out of your book.

During your preps, she tells you that she has a few parent phone calls to make, a simple white lie that will keep you out of her room without becoming suspicious.

“Oh, good luck with that one,” you chuckle as you head for your own room. “If you finish them up early, you know you’re always more than welcome to come down.”

She nods. She feels a bit guilty lying to you, but she knows it will worth it.

She spends most of her prep period researching the different meanings of flowers. She knows you love roses though, and roses come in all different colors and signify different things. She’s able to order a custom bouquet of roses, and she’s decided that she’ll put them around the school for you to find throughout your day when she’s able to pick them up. All she wants to do is make you feel as special as you made her feel. You’re worth it. She plans to buy a dozen roses, in an assortment of colors, before planning out where she’ll put them all. By the end of her research and planning, there’s only ten minutes left of her prep. Deciding that she wants to see you, she plans to order the flowers for you while she’s waiting for you to come over that night. Satisfied with her work, she closes her laptop and heads for your room.

When she gets there, she refrains from knocking for just a few seconds, taking in the sight of you.

You’re just sitting at your desk, looking at your laptop. But the way that the sun is hitting you makes you look like you’re glowing, and there’s almost a sort of angelic effect that the light in providing. One leg is crossed over the other, and the slit in your dress shows off just the smallest bit of your skin. Your blue light glasses are set on your face, and she can’t help but think that you look adorable with them on. She knows in that moment (not that she didn’t already) that she’s making the right choice. She licks her lips subconsciously before knocking gently on your door frame.

You glance up, and a smile washes over your face. “Hey. How’d the calls go?”

“Oh they went alright,” she tells you. “But it’s exhausting. Care to join me for a cup of coffee in the break room before we have to pick up our little gremlins?”

You laugh as you move your glasses so they’re on top of your head. “You know I can always use the jolt of caffeine.” You stand and make your way over to her, looping your arm through hers and heading for the staff room.

As she’s waiting for you to arrive at her house for dinner, she orders the bouquet of flowers that she’s going to give you piece by piece. 

The order gets confirmed just as you text her to let you know that you’re in her driveway. She closes her laptop and heads for the door, ready to greet you.

You look perfect to her. Golden hour is upon the two of you, and she has to refrain from pulling you into a kiss right then and there. If she does that, then her flower gesture just won’t be the same.

She picks up the flower the next morning before heading into the school earlier than she ever has. She has to beat you to the school if she’s going to pull this off. Quickly, she drops her bag at her desk before grabbing the little notecards she had prepared the night before. She organizes the flowers and gets to putting them into the different places she wants you to find them. Once every flower is in its right place, she makes her way back into her classroom to actually prepare for her day with the students.

You come wandering in not fifteen minutes later, eager to see the redhead. You take your bags into your classroom and you go to set them down on the top of the desk, but you stop. Sitting there are two gorgeous yellow roses, and there’s a note tied around them neatly. You recognize the handwriting to be Melissa’s right away.

The note reads in her beautiful script, As much as I wanted to hate you, I just couldn’t. So we started off as friends… just friends.

You pick them up and bring them to your nose, delighted with the sweet aroma they let off. You drop your bag before heading over to your cabinet and plucking out the vase that you keep at the school. You fill it with water before heading over to her room to thank her.

Taped on the door though, is another rose. This one is orange, and there’s another note tied to the stem.

As I watched you settle into your role here, I couldn’t help but admire your excitement to get to make a difference. I couldn’t help but adore you… both the personal and professional side. You made work exciting.

You pull that one off the door and stick it in your vase before you knock gently three times. Her eyes flit to you, and she smiles warmly.

“Good morning,” she says in her usual tone, as if she isn’t up to something.

“These flowers are gorgeous,” you tell her as you make your way over to the redhead. “Thank you.”

She just smiles at you softly. “Of course, hun. I’m glad you like them.”

“How did you know I love roses?” you ask as you perch yourself on her desk, admiring the beautiful flowers being held to your chest.

“You have to remember that I’ve seen you walk in here with various bouquets over the months to liven up your room… they’re always roses.”

“I didn’t know you paid that much attention,” you shrug.

She chuckles softly. “It’s hard not to pay attention to you… coffee?”

“I thought you’d never ask,” you laugh. The two of you start to make your way out of her room when you notice something taped to the inside of her door. It’s another flower- this one gold.

“How many flowers do you have hidden around here?” you ask as you gently pry it off the door and glance at the note. She ignores your question and instead gestures for you to read what she had written to pair with this rose. 

Watching your loyalty to not only your students, but this school and your work family has been nothing short of beautiful- like you.

You practically swoon at that little note, and when you look over at Melissa, she’s watching you with a fondness in her eyes. You place the flower into the vase and carry it down with you to the staff room.

You make your way over to where the coffee mugs are in order to start prepping the pot of coffee that you need to make. When you open the cupboard. there, in your mug is a beautiful yellow rose that has red ends, much like the one that you got her.

Somewhere along the line, our friendship turned into more.

As you hold that flower close and smell it, she wraps a gentle arm around your waist, resting her chin on your shoulder. You turn your head ever so slightly, and you look at her with a hopeful look.

“Is this going where I think it is?” you ask softly.

She shrugs. “Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t. But you’re not even halfway to the amount of flowers, so I guess you’ll have to wait and see.”

You roll your eyes playfully, but you’re willing to play along with her game. You half expect another rose to be waiting for you when you open the other side of the cabinet with the coffee grounds in it, but there isn’t one. You go about your morning with more pep in your step than usual, and when your crew starts to filter in to the room, they all look at the two of you curiously. Neither of you says anything, choosing to stay in this little bubble that you’ve created for yourselves. Instead, you sip on your drinks and watch the news with them like you would any other day.

All too soon, it’s time for your group to disperse for the day. You head for the vending machine as you usually do, to grab your bag of chips that you have during snack time with the kids. In the machine is a blue rose. It has a note on it, but you can’t quite see it. Sighing, you insert your money and pay for the blue rose that clearly is meant for you.

As it drops, you feel a warm hand settle on your waist again.

Our friendship had turned into more, but it was impossible. There were too many pieces to make the puzzle fit, so it didn’t happen.

You look at her, a sad look in your eyes. But there’s a sparkle in her own green ones that tells you that this still might turn out okay.

As the two of you are walking down the halls, arm in arm, you ask her quietly, “How’d you manage to get that in there? Gary usually fills our machines, and I know he isn’t about to be doing you any favors.”

She shrugs. “I know a guy.”

You laugh at that. Of course she knows another guy who could open the vending machine for her to plant the blue rose.

“Have a good morning, hun,” she tells you as she drops you at her room. “I’ll see you during prep.”

You watch her as she saunters down the halls, hips swaying just a bit more than they usually do. You have to stop yourself from drooling at the sight. 

You set the vase on your desk where you can see the beautiful flowers, but you take all of the notes off. You slip those in your purse before admiring the beautiful little bouquet that you’ve created. 

Your kids are all too thrilled to see the different flowers.

“Miss Y/N!” one of your kids grins when she walks in. “Those are beautiful! Where did you get these ones?”

You grin. “A special someone gave them to me.”

The class lets out a chorus of ‘ooh’s, and you deal with quite a line of questioning before you can convince them to continue on with your morning.

The kids are wonderful for you as always, and before you know it, you’re dropping them off at art class. The art teacher hands you two beautiful roses, one light pink and one dark pink. Attached to them is a note.

“What does it say?!” one of the girls in your class questions. They don’t let you leave the room until you’ve read the note aloud.

“And even through all of this, you’ve been nothing short of perfect. These two flowers symbolize the thanks and appreciation I have for you, all that you do, all that you’ve done, and all that I know you’ll continue to do,” you read. Again, they let out a chorus of cheers before you turn on your heel and head down the hall to your favorite coworker’s classroom.

She’s all grins as you enter with the two flowers in hand.

“I see Sheila was able to deliver the flowers to you,” she smirks.

“I’m starting to think that she’s my secret admirer.”

She rolls her eyes and nudges you playfully. “Please.”

“Too bad I’m not into her, and I have a thing for this one other coworker of mine instead… sweet redhead, if I can admit that,” you flirt.

The two of you spend your prep quietly, both of you working on things that you have to get done for the rest of the day and preparing for future days. It’s soft, it’s warm, it feels like home. Melissa feels like home.

But that time is up all too quickly, and the two of you have to go pick up your kids.

When it comes time to pack your bags to head out for the night, you can’t help but admire your flowers again. Although they look a bit… more full. Without you noticing, there’s been two white flowers slipped into the bunch, a note attached to them.

I am worthy of you, and you are worthy of me, the note reads. It’s simple. Your heart nearly melts.

You take a picture of the bouquet that you’ve gathered before grabbing your bags and heading down the hall to Melissa’s room.

“How did you manage to slip those last two in there?” you ask her as you saunter in.

She just gives you a shy smile. “Every once in a while, it pays off to have your kids be familiar with me… like when I asked Jamal if he would sneak them in there while you were busy monitoring the kids packing up. It doesn’t help when I’m out at recess duty and they come up to me crying with their drama.”

You chuckle at that. It’s the same for you with her kids. “You’re ridiculous.”

“And? You love it.”

“I do.”

“I’ll see you at my house in an hour?”

“I wouldn’t miss a homemade Schemmenti meal,” you grin.

The two of you walk out together, but this time she gently slips her hand into your own, interlocking your fingers. You glance down at them, a blush creeping into your cheeks.

She walks you to your car, before getting into her own.

You pull up to her house the promised hour later, a nice bottle of wine in hand. You don’t even have the chance to knock before she’s opening the door for you. In her own hand are two red roses. There’s a note attached to them. And before you can even take the offered flowers, she takes your hand gently and pulls you in. She kisses you softly yet passionately.

When you pull away, your smile matches the one written into her face. You glance down at the flowers, reading the note.

From friends, to an impossible love, to something that I’ve found is worth fighting for.

“Red?” you whisper. “That means…”

She nods. “It means I love you.”

Those words take your breath away, and you have to control the tears that threaten to pour over onto your cheeks as you pull her in for another kiss.

“I love you too,” you whisper once you’ve pulled apart. Your forehead rests against hers.

“I’m ready,” she tells you quietly, but with confidence.

  Yeah. She was worth the wait. 

[aceyalonso]

sera's tracks - 1k celebration

AHHHHHH 1K!!!! thank you so much, i honestly can't believe that I've reached a milestone like this because this blog started out as a joke (I wanted to see how long it would take my friends to find my blog), but here we are 🥹 I am so grateful for every single one of you 💗

similar to my 500 followers event (i swear i'll actually do this one!!), I'll give a list of songs and you guys can request.

These songs are some of my personal faves so there will be a good mix of genres for requests! there's a total of 10 songs + lyrics that you can use as a guide for what the fic/story will be (2 are songs I already have planned, the rest are up for grabs)

a/n: to my wonderful moots who i absolutely love and feel like i’ve known my entire life, @nepobbylver @iamred-iamyellow @cleopatrick-123 @emchante, i just want to say i love you guys!!!! mwah mwah mwah (I love my other moots too I swear, I just haven't had the opportunity to interact with them 😖)

how can i request?  send an ask, pairing a driver with the available songs!

↳ example: “hi! can i request [driver] + [song]? also can it be [choose from smut, angst, fluff, or a combination of any of the 2]?”

can i be added to the taglist? of course, just fill out the form below :)

↳ click me!

guide!

smut - [s] fluff - [f] angst -[a]

fics i have planned!

piano man - billy joel [f] - charles leclerc x fem!reader

butterflies - denise julia [f, s] - lando norris x fem!reader

open for requests!

guilty as sin? - taylor swift taken - oscar piastri x fem!reader - [a, s]

i keep recalling things we never did, messy top lip kiss, how i long for our trysts

these fatal fantasies giving way to labored breath, taking all of me, we’ve already done it in my head

without ever touching his skin, how can i be guilty as sin?

be with you - the ridleys taken - fernando alonso x fem!reader - [a, f, s]

someday i’ll make a home with you, it may be big, it may be small

but if the dreams don’t happen right away, that’s okay, i just wanna be with you every single day, for the rest of our lives

I'm gonna work on my temper, while you learn to speak your mind some more, i'll be more of a shelter and less of a storm

best friends brother - victorious cast, victoria justice taken - daniel ricciardo x fem!reader - [s]

i don’t know what i’m thinking, but is it wrong if i see him this weekend?

i kinda think that i might be his type, 'cause when you're not around, he's not acting too shy

i really hope i can get him alone, i just don’t want her to know

bags - clairo taken - ollie bearman x fem!reader - [f]

can you see me usin’ everythin’ to hold back?

i’m not the type to run, i know that we’re havin’ fun, but what’s the rush? kiss and then my cheeks are so flushed

can you see me? i’m waitin’ for the right time, i can’t read you, but if you want, the pleasure’s all mine

mad - ne-yo taken - franco colapinto x fem!reader - [a, s, f]

so both of us are mad for nothing, fighting for nothing

but baby, can we make up now? cause i can’t sleep through the pain

we can fuss, we can fight, long as everything’s all right between us before we go to sleep, baby we’re gonna be happy

superman - taylor swift taken - max verstappen x fem!reader - [a, f]

he’s got his mother’s eyes, his father’s ambition. i wonder if he know how much that i miss him

i watch superman fly away, you got a busy day today, go save the world, i’ll be around

something in his deep brown eyes has me saying “he’s not all bad like his reputation”

if ever you’re in my arms again - peabo bryson taken - charles leclerc x fem!reader - [a, f]

now, i’m seeing clearly how i still need you near me, i still love you so

the best of romances, deserve second chances, i'll get to you some, 'cause i promise now, if ever you're in my arms again, this time i'll you much better

it all came so easy, the lovin' you gave me, the feelings we shared, and I can still remember how your touch was so tender

guy.exe - superfruit taken - lance stroll x fem!reader - [s]

where all the boys at with financial security? a doctor, a model, a man of possibilities

oh, he’d pick me up at eight, and not a minute late, ‘cause i don’t like to wait, no

i need a man who don’t get jealous ‘less i want him to, a gentleman to take care of me in the bedroom

[neptunesgrl]

Things that my redacted favs do that are true because I said so

SWEETHEART, LASKO, GUY

SWEETHEART:

- Calls Milo angel in private, had a couple drinks and it ended up slipping out in front of the pack. David looked very confused for the rest of the night and proceeded to call SH in the middle of the night to say “what do you know”, “what did they (Angel) tell you”, etc. Angel found it incredibly amusing.

- Drinks scotch. Rarely, since it makes Milo uncomfortable. They had it in their apartment once and after they’d learned of his father’s struggle with it, they made sure to keep it out of sight when he came over. Hasn’t bought a bottle since they moved in.

- Reverse pick-pockets everyone. Hates when people make a big deal out of apologies or big emotional things. Their way to avoid it is to make silent apologies. Often but not limited to leaving a couple hundreds in their wallet, cause we all know SH makes bank.

- Nicknames for Milo include: Mi, angel (as previously mentioned), hun/honey, babe.

- Takes the NYT crossword incredibly seriously and looks forward to it more than they’d like to admit

- Raised in New England. Hopes to move back if they decide to have kids, that is until they gain their powers, and need to move back to Dahlia.

Side note: Their child listening to ‘California’ by Chappell Roan on full blast in their room and giving SH war flashbacks

- Has gained a slight NJ/NY accent from Milo. Slips out when they get mad. Specifically with the words: ‘jackass’, ‘told her (so i told ha)’, ‘off (awf)’, ‘call (just cawl me)’, etc.

LASKO:

- Constantly holding Dear’s hand. At first, it was difficult for him to initiate, but once he realized it was the least embarrassing thing he could ask for, it became habit. Sometimes Dear slides their thumb to his wrist to check his pulse when he’s nervous.

- (UNEMPOWERED AU) Dear is an EMT. Sirens used to startle and disturb Lasko, now he finds comfort in knowing Dear is getting to save people (corny and tooth rotting fluff ik)

- Once, Lasko wore Dear’s fleece that went with their uniform since they’d left it at his place and it was too cold to go out without one. It took him 10 minutes of pacing at the front door to go outside and grab the food he ordered. Just in case someone on the 2 second walk down there would need medical attention and thought he could help since he’d be wearing the EMT jacket.

- He owns every single PJO book and shamelessly reads them at least once a year. He’s in the Zeus cabin (obviously). Grover’s his favorite, because in his words, “he’s the only one worried about the logistics.”

- ‘Guilty as Sin?’ is THEIR SONG. I will not be taking any criticisms at this time or ever. It’s just the lyrics about feeling guilty for thinking about the other in that way. Like are you kidding me. ‘I’ve screamed his name, building up like waves’ DEAR WE KNOW ITS YOU IN THE WRITERS ROOM.

GUY:

(these are mostly fem leaning i am so sorry)

- Watched The Real Housewives. Insists Jersey is peak, Honey agrees. They take the finales very seriously. Honeys favorite is Margaret, Guys favorite is Melissa. He insists Honey and him are exactly like Joe and Melissa. I have RHONJ brainrot save me.

- Uses a sleep eye mask from dollar tree that says ‘nap queen’ on it. Found it in Honeys childhood bedroom.

- Raised in NYC (Brooklyn), insists he knows how to use the subway and always gets lost. Honey cracked the code within 2 days.

- Had headgear in high school. No further explanation. That’s it. That’s the HC.

- Child of…

🥁

🥁

🥁

dddiiivvvooorrrccceee!!!! i’m projecting He is so Chandler Bing coded don’t lie.

- Somewhere down the line, he’d like to write a book about him and Honey. Whether they work out or not. Very “You were a wonderful experience” / “You were…everything.” coded. Can you tell that not only am i awful at it, but I hate angst?

- Love letters EVERYWHERE. On dressers, in nightstand drawers, on the windshield of Honeys car, this man will find anywhere to put one of the many notes he has written gushing about his partner.

☕️📰🤍

This has been in my drafts for so long I feel emotional posting it. Please take good care of my baby.

[rowaelinsdaughter]

can i pla request rowaelin x reader where reader doesn’t know they’re mates and feel guilty for being attracted to both of them meanwhile rowaelin are internally begging for her to notice the bond

GUILTY

a/n;;; i got a little carried away but i loved writing this :")

WARNINGS;; guilty feelings, long chapter

she shouldn’t be feeling this. she should have done something earlier. but there was no coming back… she was in love with the queen and king of terrasen, and she felt guilty.

everything started with aelin. she entered one day to her bookstore looking for some books for her to read and to send some of them to her friend, dorian havilliard, the king of adarlan. she was going to bow when aelin told her not to, she had enough of it in the castle, she said. 

she asked her what books she was looking for. romance with some spice scenes she said. and while she entered the storehouse, aelin was cleaning the sweat in her hands. she gave her the books and told her to come back if she wanted anything more. of course. 

and she came back twice a week, sometimes she ordered some books, sometimes she didn’t buy anything… but she had the feeling that the queen of terrasen was in her bookstore for another reason. and one day she came with the king of terrasen. he was beautiful, they both were. you had been feeling something for aelin. her attention towards her, how she would always come to her bookstore when she knew for sure there were better bookstores in orynth. 

6 months passed, and she loved them. both of them. in the past few months, they had taken her out on dates, she had read with aelin in her castle room, rowan had helped her with the store… they had done things they shouldn’t have done, but they did, and now she was in love with the queen and king.

she was reading with aelin in her room, like so many days. they had decided to read the same book together and then comment on it. as they finished the last page, aelin said. “i don’t have words to describe it”

“me neither” she looked to aelin and found her eyes on her mouth. she pressed them together but aelin was still looking at them, she was going to say something when aelin kissed her. her tongue entered her mouth, she tasted like lemon verbena and kissing her was like being in heaven. but she was married to rowan, she was a married female, she had a mate. she pulled apart.

they were breathing fast, but she managed to speak “i can’t, i can’t” and she left, running to her home, leaving aelin in the room with tears rolling down her face. 

a month passed and she didn’t hear of them or saw them, as if they had already forgotten about her. but it was easier this way. it’s better this way.

it’s better this way. 

it’s better this way. 

it’s better this way. 

but she wasn’t better.

she missed them.

she missed spending the afternoon reading with aelin.

she missed going to walk with rowan.

she missed laughing with aelin and how rowan’s eyes would light up. 

she missed them like she hasn’t missed anyone. 

she had felt it the day aelin kissed her, had felt it when rowan would take her hand, a tug in her heart and a voice in her head. go. it would say. go, where?. go, just go. and it was her mother’s voice, who had told her to go every time she was with them. and know she knew what she meant. go with them. go where you feel safe. go where you are loved. go with your mates. 

mates.

she was their mate. 

and she felt guilty for it. for loving them, for being their mate. and she cried. cried for a love that was impossible. 

she had fallen asleep, her eyes red, and her mouth dry. but an incessant knocking on her door, had awakened her. she looked at the wall-clock. 2 am. barefoot, she made her way to the front door, and when she opened it… aelin was there. 

her blue and golden eyes were red from crying, bags under them, and her usually shiny hair was dull, without life. she knew rowan was near, keeping an eye on the street. 

“i need to talk to you” aelin whispered.

should she let her enter? do it. 

so she did. 

she led aelin to the couch, as she sat down, she watched as aelin started to pace. “i know that you may not want to see me or rowan, and i know i should have come the day you left, but… i didn’t know what to say or how to explain what we have, that you are our mate, and” a breathy laugh “gods, this month apart have been like being in hell, because that is what our lives feel without you. hell. we’ve been trying to tell you for months, but we were scared you would run away the moment you knew it.” she walked to her and she watched as aelin kneeled before her, taking her hands. and the tears she thought were dry, started to flow again like a waterfall. 

“but i want you to know that i love you. rowan loves you. we love you. because you are the light in our nights. you are the piece we were missing. so please, let us be yours.”

she kneeled before aelin. moving her hands away from her, she took her face with her hands, cleaning the tears with her thumbs. “i love you aelin, and i love rowan. i love both of you” aelin pressed her forehead with her’s, and a cold wind opened the window, and they watch as a hawk entered the room, and then turned into rowan. he walked to them and kneeling, he embraced both of them. he had heard everything. 

she felt the bond sing with happiness as she melted into her mates.

well done, darling… i love you. i will always love you.

EPILOGUE

she heard a little voice talk to her. but she was dreaming and that voice… she knew that voice. 

“hi there baby” 

evalyn. 

she wasn’t dreaming then. 

she blinked a few times, getting used to the sunlight that entered the bedroom. she watched down and she saw her. her silver hair was knotted, but her green eyes were bright as she talked to her belly. 

“good morning darling” she said to the little girl.

“good morning mommy” she called her mommy, while she called aelin mama. she looked again at her belly. “you think she can hear me?”

she let a low laugh. “of course she can” she said, stroking her hair. evalin climbed higher until her head was resting on her breast, and she hugged the little girl. 

aelin and rowan watched her two girls. 

we did it rowan. 

we did it, fireheart.

all rights reserved to ©rowaelinsdaughter. no tranlations allowed. no copy theme. don not copy my work.

tagging;; @throneofsapphics @danikamariewrites @hellwantfuckme @shadowdaddies

[schrodingerscougar]

Note: I don't feel like giving the poor pair a happy ending. I feel guilty for what I did to Soap in the previous part.

(part 2)

Simon had trouble sleeping lately. Every time he fell asleep, he dreamed of his best friend finding out he had kissed his girlfriend that night, and he interrogated him long enough to learn every little detail, from what her lips tasted like to how much they both enjoyed it.

In his dream the story went on as his imagination filled the gap between the kiss and the confrontation. It was full of gentle touches, delicate smiles, and secret meetings. There he knew how soft your skin was and what made you purr like a satisfied cat.

Whenever there was a chance he would remain alone with you somewhere in the hours spent awake, he immediately fled the scene and avoided talking to you. Hearing your voice and looking into your eyes would make him weak in the knees, and seeing that gorgeous smile of yours would be the nail in his coffin.

“What's wrong, Lt?” Johnny asked him one day, looking down at him from behind the bench.

The lieutenant finished the series he was doing, then put the barbell back to its place with the other man's help. He had to come up with something, a lie that could be good enough to avert the Scotsman's attention. “What makes you think I have a problem?”

Johnny let out a sigh after he sat on the floor and pulled up his knees. “I don't know, you're just strange lately. I noticed you've been avoiding my girl and since we work together, it makes things a little complicated.”

My girl. These words were heart-wrenching for Simon, he just wanted to stand up and leave to avoid this conversation. There was nothing he could have said to make the sergeant feel better without telling him about the kiss. The first one was his fault, he knew that, but you kissed him the second time.

“We just had a little argument, that's all. But I don't think that affects our job,” he said eventually.

“All right, I won't ask any more questions, I see you don't want to talk about it. But don't be too hard on her, okay? She was so sad throughout our trip during the leave. I don't want to see her like that again.”

Simon understood now. This relationship was serious from Johnny's point of view, while you–based on the way you've been apparently acting around him–had your doubts lately. It was his fault, he should have controlled himself better.

“All right, fine, I'll talk to her and we'll sort this out,” he promised.

“Thank you.”

So later in the afternoon he went to look for you, hoping you could have a normal conversation. He wasn't afraid that you would be pissed off, he was more terrified of himself not being able to keep his distance. Because he wanted to kiss you again, he wanted to tell you to break up with Johnny, beg you to choose him over his friend.

He found you in an empty briefing room, reading a book in the silence. He knocked on the door and waited for you to let him in. He could see the surprised look in your eyes, the hesitation when it came to letting him in.

“What can I help you with?” you asked as you closed your book.

Simon stepped inside and closed the door. “We need to talk about what happened back then. I want to apologize, I know I shouldn't have done that.”

Your expression softened and you stood up to walk over to him. “I kissed you too, so I should also apologize. But tell me this; do you want more from me? More than just one kiss?” you asked while you reached out to put a hand on his shoulder.

He wanted to be honest, but something told him he shouldn't be. “You're dating Johnny, it doesn't matter what I want.”

“I can... break up with him.”

“No. He loves you too much.”

You let go of him and began to pace the room like a sad ghost. Simon could sense that you wanted more too, but you understood that your boyfriend's feelings were strong enough to make you stay. Breaking up would have broken his heart, and neither of you wanted that.

In the end you came to a halt and said, “I should ask Price to let me work with them. I don't want problems with you.”

“And Johnny?”

“He'll be fine, we can still be together. But if you change your mind, if you want–”

Simon was quick to interrupt you, repeating his previous words. “It doesn't matter what I want. He's my friend, I won't steal his girlfriend.”

“And if his girlfriend likes you?”

“This can never be more than that one kiss. That one time thing,” he clarified.

Before you could say anything, he nodded and left the room, not stopping until he reached his room and laid down on the bed. Saying those things was killing him, making him feel like crying for the first time since he was young. Why couldn't he forget you? Why couldn't you say you had been drink that night and it didn't mean anything? Why didn't you say you understood that being together couldn't happen?

He couldn't help but wonder if he had just forced you to remain in a relationship you didn't want anymore. If you still loved Johnny after what happened. But at the end of the day, it didn't matter. It was none of his business after all.

[melancholymegumi]

melody's current thoughts . . . 💭

being overhaul’s special test subject ♡ but, you've accepted your phase and had become more comfortable around them— bratty even.

content warnings ; little space , bratty reader , hari is your main caretaker , Kai experiments on you , diapers/pull-ups, piss , they put you and treat you like a baby in the car , you wet yourself on the carseat and Kai degrades you for it, reader is an iPad kid. nothing smutty just fluff ):< (ew)

Hari was always the one who carries you, bathed you and buy you pretty toys! If, you've been good of course. He's also the one to let you hold plushies while getting absolutely tormented by Kai — Kai's against it, but let it slide as long as it doesn't interfere with the experiment.

I've always thought about this too— going somewhere far for a work trip with Kai and Hari, them forcing you to come along just to make sure you don't run away, they know you won't , but a precaution is needed.

Of course for the 5 hour long ride Hari had to put you pull-ups , maybe the ones with the pretty patterns if you're lucky. Kai also doesn't wanna admit it, but even if he's the “cleanest” he's still the dirtiest out of everyone. Forcing Hari to feed you more water and telling him to ignore you everytime you said you needed to go, soon making you wet yourself and degrades you for it. “I told you to be fucking patient and you couldn't even wait? I thought you said you were a big girl, maybe not. You're just a useless mutt who doesn't know how to follow orders and just wants to be pampered all day aren't you? Now poor Hari has to clean up your mess. Don't you feel guilty? Do we need to potty train you again?” and you're just sitting there crying , I mean how could you not? He was so mean for no reason! He was the one that ignored you.

Also, getting gifts for being good (2) !! It's nothing that you ever asks for though, you could be asking for a novel and he'll bring you back a dollhouse. After all , aren't you too little for that? Can you even read?

Hari also feeds you food. All of them are soft foods – and disgustingly healthy too. Porridge , oats , mushed up carrots even. Sometimes you get the good stuff— carbonara spaghetti (that he cuts into bite size pieces) , pancakes (with blue berries and less sugar syrup) all the good stuff. Snacks are a different story. You're only allowed to snack about 2-4 times a day, 5 if you're lucky. The snacks are always pretzels , baby carrots , veggie straws and apple sauce. All of the food that's mainly for toddlers.

If he feels nice, you could play on his iPad! Of course, Hari’s watching you if he's not there— only watching the shows he allows you to watch, and games that he approves of. The iPad had parental control too, which was always annoying. Don't let getting an iPad thru your head though— if you refuses to sleep without it, you'll be forced to sleep with a few melatonin gummies and the experiments will be done without any meds to take the pain away ♡

[daisynik7]

The Takada-Chan Handshake Event

Pairing: Aoi Todo x f!reader

Rating: Mature

Word Count: ~3.5k

cw: explicit language, suggestive dialogue, switch POVs (reader is in 2nd person, Todo is in 3rd)

Summary: Takada-Chan’s first Handshake Event of the summer goes better and worse than you expect.  

Author's Notes: Here’s Chapter 2! Thank you everyone who has supported this series so far. Likes, reblogs, and/or comments are always appreciated, would love to hear what y’all think so far of the story! Thank you for reading! Divider credit to @/saradika.

Previous Chapter | Masterlist | Next Chapter

Two weeks after the concert, Takada-Chan hosts her first Handshake Event of the summer in a convention center twenty minutes away. It’s currently six in the morning as you stand outside the doors, a thermos full of hot coffee in one hand and a small tote bag of your belongings in another. Because of your sour experience at the concert, you plan thoroughly today, deciding to arrive at the convention center. Six hours early. 

Basic logic and reasoning are clouded by your extreme dedication to this pop idol. This is what you realize as you wait outside the building at the crack of dawn, still half asleep. The only solace you find in your current predicament is that you are first. No one can stand in front of you this time.

You packed all the essentials you need to make the next several hours pass by quickly. A small blanket to lay flat on the ground, marking your territory. The pillow to cushion your bottom from the hard pavement. Even snacks and a small bento for lunch for when you get hungry. No matter what the circumstance, you are not leaving this spot. 

Settling in comfortably into your makeshift camp, you start one of Takada-Chan’s concert specials downloaded on your phone. With no one around yet, you listen to it out loud without headphones, nodding your head along to the beat of the music. Fortunately, with Takada-Chan as a welcomed distraction, the first hour flies by. 

7 AM. Five more hours to go. There are a few people around now, walking by to kickstart their day, though no one falls in line behind you. Good. You pat yourself on the back for being here ahead of everyone else. If that’s not true dedication, you don’t know what is! You check your text messages from Sara, sending her a selfie of you holding a peace sign along with a message saying, “Early bird gets the worm!”

You don’t expect a response right away, considering she’s still asleep on a Saturday morning, like a normal person. She thinks this isn’t worth waking up at the ass-crack of dawn just to receive a handshake. In fact, her exact words to you were, “You’ve got to be out of your fucking mind.”

Maybe you are, but you don’t care. Most people have hobbies or interests they would do crazy things for. This is fun for you. You are willing to do it. Would it be nice if you had someone that shared the same level of interest you have for Takada-Chan? Sure, because you won’t have to keep dragging Sara around with you, subjecting her to your ridiculousness. While she is generally a good sport about it, you’d feel significantly less guilty if she actually liked Takada-Chan as much as you. You don’t blame her at all for not wanting to be with you right now, especially in these conditions.

At 7:30, you hear footsteps walking towards you. It’s a young man with spiky, pink hair wearing a yellow tee and blue shorts, seemingly a few years younger than you. He falls in line behind you, leaning against the wall. When you look up at him from your seated position, he gives you a friendly smile, waving. “Hello.”

You return his greeting happily. “Good morning.” 

After formal introductions, where you find out his name is Yuji Itadori, he puts his hands in his pockets and sighs. “Can’t believe you’re here earlier than me. What time did you get here?”

“6:00 AM,” you answer.

He lets out a whistle. “Dang. Dedicated fan, huh?”

You laugh as you stand up, matching him. “Yeah, I guess you could say that. The last event was completely ruined for me, so I learned from my mistakes.” 

His expression becomes curious. “What happened the last time?”

“I was at her mall concert two weeks ago. This massive guy blocked my view the entire time, refusing to move.”

He buries his face in his hand, shaking his head and chuckling. “Sounds like Todo.”

Your eyes widen, recognizing the name. “That’s him! He screamed out to her as she walked off stage! Is he really your friend?”

“Were you near the front of the stage?” After you confirm with a nod, he adds, “Yup, that was him. Oh man. Sorry, but Todo will do anything for Takada-Chan. You stood no chance at all.”

The rage from that confrontation comes surging back, still fresh and hot on your mind. You groan, frustrated. “Ugh, I can’t believe that guy is your friend! He’s such a jerk!” 

He shrugs, stating plainly, “That’s Todo. When it comes to Takada-Chan, he gets pretty crazy.”

You cross your arms over your chest, pouting. “Well, I hope I never have to see him again. Sorry, I know he’s your friend, but I can’t have another event ruined for me.”

Itadori flashes you a guilty glance, mumbling, “Well, actually…”

Suddenly, a voice booms out from the distance. “Brother! I got coffee and donuts!” Oh hell no. It’s him, the asshole! Why? Why is this happening to you? You planned today out perfectly! The giant meathead struts to his pink-haired friend, as cocky and aggravating as the first time you saw him. You turn around so your back is facing the two men behind you, desperately hoping the idiot doesn’t recognize you. In a panic, you take your phone out and text Sara:

SOS NEED BACKUP ASAP 

also, can you please bring me a donut

~~~

Todo orders two iced coffees and a half dozen classic glazed donuts from the café across the street. Today is off to a great start; he managed to convince his best friendo to wake up early and stand in line with him for Takada-Chan’s Handshake Event. This isn’t his first; in fact, he’s quite the regular at these type of events. Hopefully the idol actually remembers him this time. 

Balancing all the treats in his hands, he walks to the convention center, certain that they’ll be first in line. There’s no other fan dedicated enough to wait hours before the event starts just for a handshake. Only heloves Takada-Chan enough to do that. So, it’s a major surprise when he finds someone already ahead of Yuji, literally camped there with a blanket and pillow. 

He announces his presence, approaching Yuji to stand next to him, inspecting the person before them. In the lowest voice he can muster, he whispers, “Is this person here for the event?”

Yuji rubs the back of his neck, replying in a hushed voice, “Yeah, she’s been here since 6 AM.”

“What?!” Todo yells, completely abandoning any discretion. He glares at the woman ahead. Who is this chick? How dare she claim the first spot in line! That should be his!

He pushes past Yuji, tapping on the woman’s shoulder. “Ahem, are you in line for Takada-Chan?”

“Yes”, she responds, not moving a muscle. 

“Well, you see, I’m Takada-Chan’s #1 fan. I’ve known her since middle school. She’s actually my future wife. That being said, I think that I should be first.”

No response. She remains motionless, refusing to even glance back at him. The nerve. 

Growing impatient, he asks, “So, think we can switch?” 

Finally, she cranes her head just enough to peer at him. “Nope,” she answers, facing forward again. What. The. Fuck?! 

A little louder now, he cajoles, “Come on, don’t be like this. You’re going to deny her #1 fan his rightful spot?”

“Not my problem,” she says, venom laced in her tone. Why does this interaction sound familiar?

It all comes rushing back to him. In the same nanosecond it takes for him to imagine fake scenarios from his childhood, his mind returns to an actual memory from two weeks ago. He uttered those exact words to that short girl who was behind him at the concert. The girl who argued with him, called him an idiot and an asshole. This is the same girl. The loser. 

His rival. 

If she thinks she can compete with him in this battle to be Takada-Chan’s #1 fan, she has another thing coming. No one beats Aoi Todo in a contest. No one. And when it comes to the pop idol, there isn’t another living entity in the world that can match his devotion to her. He accepted her rejection in middle school for crying out loud, a fact that all people except Todo continue to dispute. This gal has no idea what she just got herself into. 

Through gritted teeth, Todo growls, “So it’s gonna be like this? Fine. I hope you don’t mind me singing then. I’ve been told I’m tone-deaf, but if I sing loud enough, I’m sure I’ll hit the right notes!” He starts his playlist on his phone, maximizing the volume. In his biggest voice, he begins belting the first song, Love Gem. Yuji hides behind his palms, embarrassed.

She whips around, finally meeting him face-to-face, yelling, “Oh fantastic! I love this song! I hope you don’t mind me joining in!” Her singing is even louder than Todo, which surprises him. He can admit that she carries a tune better than he could, but still, it’s annoying.

They go at it for about thirty minutes, two noisy, obnoxious adults angrily screaming Takada-Chan lyrics at each other. Todo even tries to play some underground tracks that he thought only he knew, but she perfectly recites it with a raised eyebrow, willing to accept whatever challenge he presents to her. 

Seriously, who is this chick?

~~~

It’s been a half hour long battle of attrition against the imbecile, to which you think you’ve won. Todo seems winded, strands from his neat bun coming loose, sweat beading off his forehead. It doesn’t surprise you since the guy has been straight up screaming at you for thirty minutes. 

Sara finally arrives, carrying a backpack with another small bag in hand. She approaches cautiously, ending the bizarre singing match. Todo huffs and puffs, glaring at you as you catch your own breath. “I could hear you from down the street,” she says, smirking. “Sounded like two sentient cats starring in their own musical. Imagine my disappointment finding out it’s just you two,” She passes you the bag, carrying a donut inside, as well as a water bottle she retrieves from her backpack. “Thank you,” you say, taking a swig. 

“So, what is going on here?” she asks, pointing at you, then at Todo. 

“This idiot asked me to switch spots with him even though I was here first. He thinks he deserves it, or whatever.”

Todo interrupts. “I don’t think, I know I deserve it!”

“I wasn’t talking to you, idiot!” you yell back. 

“Stop calling me an idiot!”

“Stop being an idiot then!”

Sara, once again, steps between you, intervening. “Cut it out. You are adults, act like it. You two are going to be here for the next four hours, do you really want to waste your energy bickering with each other?”

You pout, knowing she’s right. It’s difficult containing your pettiness with him; something about him really grinds your gears.

Eventually, Todo’s grimace softens, muttering a reluctant, “Fine.” 

Sara looks at you, waiting. You roll your eyes, obliging. “Fine.”

She claps her hands with a smile, as if she just solved world peace. “Alright! Now shake on it. Did you even introduce yourselves yet? Shouldn’t the top two Takada-Chan fans at least know each other’s names?”

He grunts, extending his large palm to you. You grab hold of it, surprised at how soft his skin is. The two of you shake hands slowly, stating your names, neither of you letting go. Letting go means you concede. Letting go means you lose. 

He tugs you slightly forward, whispering, “You may be first in line, but I’m still Takada-Chan’s #1 fan.” He gives you a smirk, tightening his grip on you.

Feeling bold, you clench him tighter, also pulling him closer, using all your strength to move his mountain of a body. You’re practically nose-to-nose now. “Have fun waiting in second place, behind Takada-Chan’s true #1 fan,” you retort, returning his annoying smirk with one of your own. His eye twitches, annoyed with you. Sara groans beside you while Itadori cackles, amused. 

The next couple of hours elapse normally, thanks to Sara’s presence and the distraction of the two behind you. Sara and Itadori seem to get along well as they chat with one another in line, laughing often. Todo and you stay firmly in your spots, listening to your own Takada-Chan playlists on your headphones. Occasionally you’ll exchange irked glances, arms crossed, guards still up. No matter what, you won’t let him win whatever bizarre competition you currently find yourselves in.   

More fans line up and by 11 AM, the convention center opens, workers directing you inside. By this time, Sara and Yuji leave, neither friend intending to stay for the actual event. You are led through velvet ropes until you see a small table set up in front of a black backdrop. This must be where Takada-Chan will greet people with a handshake. By 11:45 AM, you can’t help but tremble with excitement. 

Todo scoffs obnoxiously. “Something funny?” you ask, facing him. 

“For a self-proclaimed #1 fan, you make it so obvious that you’ve never been to one of these before. It’s comical,” he says, eyebrow raised at you. 

You scowl at him. “Just because this is my first one, doesn’t make me less of a fan.”

“Actually, it does. I’ve been to so many of these, I’ve lost count. The fact that you haven’t been to any, and you still stand here claiming to be #1. It’s pathetic.”

It takes all the resolve you have to keep calm. Only fifteen minutes to go. You’ve managed to last the past four hours with this asshole breathing down your neck. Don’t let him ruin it now. “You can think whatever you want. I know in my heart how much I love Takada-Chan. You can’t take that away from me,” you argue, voice wavering with animosity. 

“Love? If you think your love for Takada-Chan exceeds mine, then you’re more delusional than I initially gave you credit for.” 

He really knows how to get under your skin. Where are Sara’s brass knuckles when you need them? “Alright, I get it, you’re in love with Takada-Chan. Creep. I admit, I haven’t been to many events yet, but we all have to start somewhere. Plus, I already proved to you that I know the lyrics to all her songs, even her underground stuff. Don’t think I didn’t notice you testing me earlier.”

He lets out a barking laugh. “Yeah okay, that was impressive. But you still have a lot to learn before you can call yourself a true fan. I can teach you a few things if you want.” 

“And why would I want that?”

He leans in close, grinning, a wicked look in his eyes. “I’m a pretty good teacher,” he says in a low voice. “I’m sure there’s a lot you can learn from me.” 

Something about the way he says it is intriguing, almost enticing. You remember he is an absolutely douchebag, so the thought passes quickly. “I know everything I need to know about Takada-Chan, thank you very much.”

“Oh really?” he challenges, rapid firing questions about Takada-Chan, to which you answer perfectly. This occupies your time until you hear the other fans in the crowd start to scream. You didn’t even notice Takada-Chan walk into the room because this moron distracted you. But lo-and-behold, there she is, posing in front of the black backdrop, cute as ever. You turn away from Todo, frown literally turning upside down into the brightest smile, in awe that she’s right in front of you.

The security guard beckons you to the table. Your hands jitter with excitement as you walk towards her, stuttering, “Hi Takada-Chan!”

The pop idol smiles politely. “Hi there! Does your boyfriend want to come up with you?” 

Confused, you respond, “Huh? My boyfriend?”

She points at Todo, standing in the front now with a delighted expression on his face, gawking at Takada-Chan. You wave your hands, trying to explain. “No, no, he’s not my – ”

She cuts you off. “I just love couples! It’s rare to see female fans, but it’s even more rare to see couples! How adorable! I love it so much!” she beams, motioning to Todo. Bewildered, he slowly steps towards the table, standing beside you, blushing.

“Aw, you two are just the cutest!” She shakes both of your hands enthusiastically. From your peripheral, you can see Todo glowing, completely unaware of the context.

Takada summons one of her security guards, requesting, “Can you grab a few posters from my dressing room?” The man nods, walking to the back room. She faces you and giggles. “I wasn’t supposed to give any posters away until my next event, but I’ll make an exception for you two.” She winks, and you’re almost certain yours and Todo’s hearts will soon burst from your chests.

“Thank you so much, Takada-Chan!” you say in unison, tears in your eyes. 

“Of course! How about a Taka-Tan Beam? You have your phones ready?”

You and Todo absolutely lose it. He holds his phone out, hands trembling, actual tears rolling down his cheeks. You shuffle around your purse to retrieve your phone, also shaking, ready to record.

“Ready? Taka-Tan Beam!” she exclaims, flashing her signature pose. 

The two of you clap your hands enthusiastically, praising her. Talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show stopping, spectacular… 

The security guard comes back carrying posters rolled up under his arm. He hands them to the pop idol, who then gives them to you. “Thank you so much for coming!”

Todo leans forward, palms on the table. “Thank you, Takada-Chan! Thank you! Thank you!”

“Thank you, Takada-Chan!” you repeat, pulling Todo by the sleeve of his shirt to the exit with you. As you leave, he bows continuously towards the idol, who waves farewell kindly. 

Once outside, you find a bench to sit at. Todo is nearly foaming at the mouth, still unaware of what just happened. You hand him half of the posters, which he takes without looking at you.

“Taka-Tan. Beam,” he mutters in his catatonic state. His gaze is completed glazed over.

“Hey, Todo. Snap out of it,” you say, waving your hand in front of his face to get his attention. When that fails, you bop his head with one of the rolled-up posters.

“Huh?” He finally comes to, focusing on you. 

You laugh. “I can’t believe that just happened.”

“I can’t believe it either. But what was she saying exactly? I was too distracted by her beauty…” he trails off. You tap him again before he goes into a trance.

“She thought we were a couple,” you explain. 

“EH?”

“Yeah. I guess she saw us bickering in line and just assumed,” you elaborate, shrugging.

“She gave us special treatment,” Todo muses, stroking his chin, contemplating. 

What a turn of events. As much as you despise this man, being associated with him worked out the best for you in this particular instance. Takada-Chan thinks you two are a cute couple and she likes it, so much that she gave you exclusive items and extra attention. The sparkle in her eyes was mesmerizing as she performed the Taka-Tan Beam. It went better than you could have ever imagined.

Todo starts to speak, bringing you out of your reverie. “Look, I’m not that keen on Takada-Chan thinking I’m taken, especially by you. But since she can’t date right now anyways, I guess I don’t mind pretending. As long as we keep getting her attention.” 

“What are you saying? You want to pretend to be a couple?”

“Only for Takada-Chan events. Obviously.” There’s that smug look again. 

Eyebrows furrowed, you comment, “What, am I not good enough for you?”

He stands up, towering over you with a shit-eating grin on his face. “I know you’re not good enough for me.”

Hot rage tingles in your belly. What a fucking asshole. On your feet, you only come up to his chest, so you tilt your gaze up to glare at him. “You couldn’t handle me anyways, you fucking prick.” 

He leans down, his breath tickling your skin as he whispers, “I hope you don’t kiss anyone with that dirty mouth of yours.”

You get on your tippy-toes, closing the gap even more, challenging him. You swallow hard, not sure how to respond, but not afraid to back down. He holds your gaze, his mouth twitching slightly as his grins.

All of sudden, you’re very aware of how provocative this situation might look to an outsider. You feel it yourself. Whatever this angry tension is, it’s sort of… 

Okay brain, stop thinking like this. You hate this man. Despise him. Angry thoughts. Angry. 

He doesn’t relent. If you’ve learned anything about this beast the two times you’ve encountered him, he will notback down from a challenge. And knowing yourself, you won’t be able to keep up with him. But you can try. “I’d rather eat shit than be your fake girlfriend,” you hiss at him. You grab your purse and stomp off, leaving him behind. 

“Ha, then don’t expect my help at the next Takada-Chan event!” he yells out. 

As you walk to the train station, you make a promise to yourself to never interact with this oaf ever again. 

[the-universal-sun]

What causes the Stan Twins to throw tantrums most often when regressed?

Ford usually has a strong grasp on his emotions and temperament, he’s had to learn to reign himself in during his inter dimensional travels. So usually, he can allow himself to remain level headed and rational. When he’s little, however, he loses that tight grasp on his emotions, he allows himself to act more childishly, to whine and pout without fear of consequences. Which also means he doesn’t have the emotional grasp to reign in any forming temper tantrums, rare as they are.

I think that Ford would only have a temper tantrum when he’s tired, as what happens with most children. Say he misses a nap, that means he’s cranky and his fuse is shortened, but because he’s cranky, everything irritates him, Lego’s not clicking together on the first try, the shirt tag that won’t stop tickling his neck, even the stray crayon mark on the outside of the pictures lines. So by the time he has a full blown temper tantrum, his temper has already been tested by everything. I think it would really come to ahead when he’s in the middle of a documentary or a Lego set and Stan (or Fidds) tells him it’s bedtime, so he has to clean up. He’s tired, and irritated, but he wants to finish what he was doing, not go to bed, so he just kind of explodes. He yells and cries that he doesn’t want to go to bed, he has to finish what he was doing and that it wasn’t fair, he’s not a baby so he shouldn’t have a bedtime!

Stan would never get mad or yell at him, he missed a nap so he’s already tired and short tempered, and he’s going to be apologizing profusely the next day anyways, there’s no reason to scare him or make him feel worse. Now, what he would do is wrap his arms around Ford and shush his while slowly rocking the both of them, the feeling of Stan’s breathing against Ford’s back would help in calming him down from his yelling at least. Stan would explain that yes he understand he wants to finish his activity, but Ford already missed his nap and stayed up 2 hours passed his bedtime. If (faulty) logic doesn’t prevail with his brother, Stan doesn’t hesitate to bring up the fact that he himself is tired (true) but he can’t sleep without his Lil’ Sixer (also true) so can he please come to bed?

One thing about Ford is that he’s insanely protective over Stan, both when he’s big and little, it just shows up in different ways. When he’s little, he wants to “protect” Stan from things that could make him sad, like changing the channel if one of those sad animal commercials comes on, or sleeping with him to keep away Stan’s bad dreams (it keeps both of their nightmares away). Most of the time, Stan just humors him because he can really tell that this stuff only affects Ford, but sleeping together really does help Stan keep his bad dreams away.

Hearing that Stan needs him is the quickest way to calm Ford down, he likes being someone Stan can turn to for anything, and he’ll do anything for Stan, even eat those nasty vegetables (Ford’s favorite food is jelly beans, I know he does not eat his vegetables as often as he should). How could he forget that he chases away Stan’s nightmares, he’s Stan’s protector, and here he is, throwing a tantrum because he wanted to stay up later! His tears would calm down and he’d mumbled a very pitiful “sorry” that has Stan squeezing him tighter and telling Ford that no apologies are needed. Stan’s not mad at him, he never will be, and that he’s not in trouble. He then would direct Ford to sit on a chair and quickly cleans up whatever Ford was doing, putting Lego pieces away or pausing and turning off the tv from his documentary. He walks Ford through their night time routine, helping him tune his tooth brushing and holding him as he’s stepping into his pajamas. He knows that Ford’s quick to feel guilty about his outbursts, so to calm him down, after he’s tucked in with Dr. Mittens, Stan climbs into bed next to him, wraps him in his arms and reads Ford’s favorite bedtime story when little, The Hobbit, until he falls sleep, after which Stan settles down, clinging to Ford, and drifts off to the sound of his brothers breathing.

Now Stan is younger than Ford when regressed, so he’s more prone to meltdowns than tantrums, but anything to do with anything medical will throw Stan into a tantrum. Before Ford figured the solution of crushing Stan’s pills and putting them into pudding, Stan would scream and cry when he had to take them. He hates pills and anything to do with Doctors. When Ford would bring out his medicine, Stan would try to run away, keep his mouth closed, and turn his head away so he could be forced to open his mouth. If Ford successfully got the pills in his mouth, he’d have to keep his hand over his mouth so Stan wouldn’t spit the pills out. The kicking and yelling and tears was breaking Ford’s heart. He wasn’t mad at Stan by any means, he’s always had a hard time taking pills, the act itself stresses him out, and now Ford feels like he’s hurting his brother, but these are important medications that Stan needs to take daily.

When Stan finally swallows the pills, Ford brings onto his lap and buries Stan’s face in his neck, letting himself cry a few tears, his guilt for putting Stan through this getting to him, rocking them both to the motion of their boat. He get Stan a nice big cup of cooled down hot chocolate, and lets him curl up on his lap with Poindexter and Shanklin 2 as he reads Charlottes Web aloud, pausing every so often to just look at Stan, to check on him and make sure he’s feeling calm again. They both fall asleep like this, heads pressed against each other with a silent promise to do better next time.

(It’s after this when Ford comes up with the idea to mix the crushed pills in pudding, which makes the whole process easier for both of them)

(This kind of veered off into a bit of a different direction, I’m sorry)

[helaelaemond]

Lost Absolution Pt3 - Osferth x reader

Pairing: Osferth x reader

Word count: 3.4k

Fic summary: Osferth thinks of you during morning prayer, and sneaks into your room to find your scent while you're gone. He chases his pleasure, guilty though it makes him, and you watch him find his pleasure. Can be read as standalone piece. Masturbation, mutual masturbation, solo dry humping, mentions of oral and fingering.

Content warning(s): Religious guilt, historically inaccurate representation of Saxon Christianity and Roman Catholic traditions, angst

Rating: Explicit

Part 1 / Part 2

Tag list: @sylasthegrim / @myfandomprompts / @arcielee / @babyblue711 / @troublesomesnitch

Masterlist

You walk with Osferth to morning prayer. You prefer to pray later, but he likes to start his day with it in the little chapel on the estate. There is ice on the ground, and you insist on holding his arm to keep him steady.

"You're still healing, lean on me," you tell him with a quiet laugh. In the courtyards, your fellow servants bustle about their business and pay you no mind. In your concentration, keeping focus on the pathway, you miss how Osferth looks down at you with longing.

"I am well, lady," he replies softly.

You smile up at him. He's so tall. "And you shall stay that way, so long as you do not fall. Careful-"

He puts the weight on his foot wrong on a little patch of ice, and it throws off his balance. With a strangled noise of surprise, he clutches onto your arm and shoulder. It's impossible to stop him from falling, but you greatly reduce the speed with which it happens - your feet are firmly planted on solid ground, and you manage to ease him, more than drop him, to the ground.

"Osferth!" you laugh. You lean over him as you grasp his arm and waist, doing your best to keep him safe. "Are you alright?"

His cheeks flush from the cold, from the embarrassment. "I'm sorry."

"There is nothing to forgive," you assure him warmly. "Are you in pain?"

He shakes his head and bites his lip. Casting his eyes down, he tries to get up, but winces.

"Let me help."

For a heartbeat, it looks like he is going to protest. But when you squeeze the hand you hold, and you smile so kindly, he nods. With your help, he gets back on his feet. The light is gone from his eyes, though, and he won't look at you. When you try to take his hand again, he clasps them both behind his back.

"Your wound, is it-?" Without thinking, your hand goes to his stomach to feel his dressings. The touch makes him flinch. Osferth's sudden change in demeanour makes you swallow. "Forgive me."

His expression is pained. "There is nothing to forgive, lady."

During the weeks that he has grown healthier and stronger, you have repeatedly asked him to use your name and not a title to which you have no claim. Usually, you are both laughing when the topic is raised, but you don't feel like laughing now. Quietly, you ask, "won't you use my name?"

He bites his pretty lip and looks down. His brows furrow like he's concentrating, and unreadable expressions flicker across his face. How difficult he can be to read sometimes, you lament. He won't let you in, not really. There is something holding him back.

"Not today, lady."

"Alright." Tentatively, you take his arm again. The expression he wears would make any passer-by think you were marching him to the gates of Hell, so uncomfortable is he now. He is all stiff and icy, but perhaps it is the pain. You'll have to examine him later.

At the door of the chapel, you let go of his arm and turn to him. "I'll return for you when the bell rings."

"You are very kind," he murmurs, expression fixed on the ground. "I do not thank you enough for all that you do."

You give him a smile that he does not see. "It is why I am here, Osferth. I am here to help."

"But still. I do not thank you enough."

He gives you a pained smile without meeting your gaze before ducking into the chapel. You watch him go inside, and as the door closes, you turn back to your work with an ache in your chest.

There is no one else in the chapel this morning. That is not unusual - many different worshippers come in at different times, and most of the estate is made up of servants who are busy at this hour. So Osferth has the little hall to himself. He approaches the altar, and makes the sign of the cross.

"In nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti. Amen."

There is a small wooden statue of the Mother to the left of the altar, and Osferth fixes his eyes upon it as he clasps his hands in prayer, and sinks to his knees in front of the pew.

"Ave Maria, gratia plena, Dominus tecum."

The words roll off his tongue without thinking. Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb.

His forehead drops onto his clasped hands and he groans softly. The feeling of your hand on his waist will not go away. It had been a soft pressure to hold him safe, yet it had felt like... like... like you were holding him for something else. When you had bent over him, your hair had tickled his face and he caught the smell of rosemary in it. Yes, that's what you use to oil it sometimes, rosemary. That scent haunts his nights.

How good it would feel to bless your womb with his child, to bury himself in you and find his completion with his nose buried in your fresh-smelling hair-

"Sancta Maria, Mater Dei, ora pro nobis peccatoribus-"

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now.

Osferth swallows and fixes his eyes on the statue again. "Nunc, et in hora mortis nostrae. Amen."

You wore a green dress today, green like moss in spring. Osferth loves that colour on you. It makes him think of warmer days. The collar is high and there are laces across your neck against the winter chill, and he stares at the Mother until she resembles you. At her throat, he sees those laces, and he can feel himself untying them to touch the skin underneath. How warm you must be compared to December.

Just the thought of the skin at your throat makes the blood rush between his thighs. The breath he takes in is shaky. "Ave Maria, gratia plena. Dominus..."

Three more Hail Marys are spoken softly by the time he is hard, and his mind is foggy. Rosemary. Spring. Moss. Hail Mary, full of grace. Rosemary, spring, moss. The Lord is with you. The slope of your neck, the shadows of your collarbones. Blessed are you among women.

Blessed are you among women.

When he had been sick, you had worked over his bare torso and touched his flaming skin with a soothing hand. Most memories of that time have faded with the healing of his body, but fragments remain. Your fingers ghosting over his heart, carefully applying pressure. Your strong grip at his hip to turn him slightly and fit bandages around his back and stomach.

Pray for us sinners now, and at the hour of our death.

From the precipice of death you had pulled him, yet closer to it he now returns. For this is purgatory, surely, to desire you like this. To need you.

"Forgive me, Lord," he sighs quietly. "Help me, please. I'm... w-weak. Please."

Even as tears begin to spill down his cheeks, the vision of you returns to his mind. In his mind, you take him into your arms and stroke his hair. You hold him close and comfort him. He grips his hands tighter together and closes his eyes as if this will help. Breaths quicken, but whether that is from anguish or arousal, he doesn't know.

The vision of you slips your dress off and you cradle him in your lap. He weeps, and you run your fingers through his hair as you soothe him. Osferth is allowed to weep, and he is comforted with a hand behind his head, and a nipple in his mouth. He suckles on you in his mind and whimpers.

His knees begin to hurt. The floor of the chapel is cold stone, and he gasps as reality comes crashing around him. "Forgive me, Lord, please. I do not mean to have these thoughts, I-"

This place is not for him right now. He cannot be in the house of God whilst his mind is plagued with such unholy thoughts of you. Ice be damned. He hurries out of the sanctuary, and back to the hall he has been afforded for his healing. It's still early and there are few people around, but still, he wraps his cloak tightly around him. No one needs to see him in such a state.

As expected, you are not here when he returns. He approaches the little antechamber you are using during your time as his helper, and he peeks in. It's only to make sure you're not here, of course, but...

It's wrong, what he does, he knows this. But he doesn't care enough to stop. Your bed is unmade, and the blankets are crumpled towards the bottom of it. At the top, the single soft pillow is folded in half, and the shift you wear to sleep is thrown across it.

Don't do it. Don't come any closer.

Osferth swallows. There are butterflies in his stomach as the visions of being in your lap come rushing back. Rosemary. Spring. Moss.

He glances around, but no one will come. The hall is private, for his use only, and yours. Finan often strides in like he owns it, but it is too early in the morning for him. You are not due back at the chapel until the bell is rung and that is another half hour away at least. You won't be back.

Osferth is in your room, and he is alone.

His feet slowly carry him across the room to your bed. The butterflies make him float, and before he can stop himself, he has reached out and taken your night shift into his hands. Bringing it up to his nose, he inhales deeply. Eyes closing, he lets the smell of you wash over him. God, it's better than he thought.

It takes the strength from him. He sits down on the edge of your bed. Against the linen, his mouth opens, and he runs his tongue along it as if to catch a taste. All it does is dry out his mouth. But it's something. It's something tangible about you. If he doesn't think about it, then he doesn't need to register what's happening.

He can just live in the moment, and forget about it later. As if it never happened.

Hands turn into fists in the fabric as he presses it to his face. There are different smells at different places of the garment. Along the neckline is that rosemary. It must have dripped down your scalp and neck and onto the linen. His eyes roll back into his head as he thinks of the journey it got to take. He envies the oil.

It has anointed you in places he will never touch.

Control is ebbing away from the once pious man. Further down your night shift he goes, below where it would cover your waist. With new vigour, he runs it under his nose until he catches a sweetly sour scent that makes his mouth water. Inhaling deeply, he feels his mouth pool with saliva. That smell, that fucking smell. He wants to taste it on you so desperately-

"Oh, Lord."

Osferth squeezes his hand around the fabric where your smell clings faintly, and pulling it away again, he licks his fingers for the ghost of your taste. Nothing. Perhaps he will find your undergarments and suck them in his mouth until your taste is as familiar as bread and ale.

He fumbles with his leather harness that has a cross embossed onto it, and he casts it aside. With it goes the cross around his neck. There is nothing holy left here.

"Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now,"

It is to your pillow that he now turns. On it, the smell of rosemary is much stronger, and he moans into it. In the privacy of his solitude, Osferth moans your name. Tears of absolute need leak from his pretty eyes.

"My sweet lady, lady, lady."

Using the strength you have nurtured back into him, Osferth climbs atop your bed and presses the pillow into his face. He inhales as desperately as a drowning man until you are in his veins and he will never get you out. Rosemary fills his mind, moss and spring, laces at your throat. The vision of himself in your lap morphs into something else now. He lies on his stomach with his face buried into your pillow, and he cannot stop his hips from grinding down against the mattress.

In his mind, you are below him. You're on your stomach, too, and he fills you from behind. You mewl softly as his cock fills you perfectly, like he was made for you.

Blessed are you amongst women.

With you, Osferth is most blessed. In reality, his clothes are rough and grinding against the bed hurts, but he is not in reality now. He moans into your pillow that he imagines is your hair. You moan back so sweetly it almost feels true.

Into your pillow he whimpers your name. The movement of his desperate hips still only so he can push his breeches down. His hard cock springs free and it's flushed and leaking. He can't bring himself to look at it. Instead, he covers it with your pillow. Onto his stomach he returns, this time with it between him and the bed. How easy it is to think of this dry softness as you.

There is an ache in his stomach and back as he fucks your pillow desperately. He grinds against it as he would grind against you. His chest tightens as he thinks of you. How fucking wet you would be for him if he treated you right. He bites his lip as he thinks about spreading your legs and pressing his tongue there, sliding it up and down and letting it slip inside you, if that's what you liked.

He's never even kissed a woman. But he's seen the act, although it never much interested him. He never wanted it until he met you. Now, it's all he can think about. What do you look like between your legs? Pink like a summer rose, perhaps? Or dark like fine wine, rich and generous? He doesn't care. He wants every version of you.

His thrusts get more desperate as his thoughts carry him away. Once he's made you come on his tongue and long fingers, he'll push you onto your stomach and fill you from behind like this, like he's fucking your pillow. He'll ask you to turn your head towards him so he can kiss you and see your expression, and whisper in your ear how beautiful you are. Surely you'd say something sweet in return.

You're so good to him. You take care of him.

Let Osferth take care of you. He wants to be so good to you. So good.

He cries out your name again. All reason has left him, all sensibility.

So when the door creaks open behind him, he barely has the sense to glance over his shoulder and look at who it is. When he sees it's you, he's sure it's just his imagination. Moss green. Laces at your throat.

You see him on his stomach atop your bed, your pillow under his hips. You watch as he grinds against it, eyes half closed, forehead sweaty. It sends bolts of heat between your legs. You're lost for words, and lost to need.

"Osferth?"

When you call his name, he whimpers again. His hips keep moving. "My lady!"

You're frozen in the doorway. Even if you had wanted to, you can't make yourself move forward, lest it break the spell over you both.

When you pull up your skirts and expose yourself to him, he is sure he has died and gone to heaven. When you bury your fingers into your folds, he whines your name. It's the first time you've heard him use it.

"Yes, Osferth."

He is utterly lost. He's never been aroused like this, never been driven so mad with need, so plagued with visions. Straining his head to watch you makes his neck begin to ache, but it doesn't matter because you are rubbing circles between your thighs and grinding down against your hand and your face is split with frustration and delight and he knows how you feel and-

"Oh! Oh, Lord, my God-!" Osferth moans. Tears leak down his cheeks.

"Yes, yes! Fuck, Osferth, I-"

"Oh, oh! Yes, oh-!"

He comes with a guttural noise that sends you spiralling, too. He jerks against your pillow again and again as he rides his high with green in his eyes and rosemary in his nose. Spring, he has hopes for spring. Pleasure washes over you both in powerful waves. For Osferth, this means curling up on the bed and panting, eyes closed at the intensity of it.

For you, it means leaning against the doorway and letting your knees give out. Your skirts fall back into place as you slide down to sit on the floor, breathless.

Osferth is turned away from you. A few minutes pass, and your heart begins to return to a steady pace along with your breathing. From the sounds of it, he is coming back down, too. "Osferth?"

If he hears you, he ignores you. You watch as he sits up - still facing away from you - and sorts out his clothes. You didn't get to see his nakedness, and you still haven't. God, you want to. You've dreamed about sliding his cock into you hand and mouth, and how good it would be to see what you so long for. But no, he hides himself, turns himself away.

"Osferth, please look at me."

He turns to you as he walks around the bed to pick up his cross and harness, but he doesn't meet your eye, let alone speak. You're in the doorway, though, and he'll have to acknowledge you at some point. Slowly, he puts the leather garment back on, and there is a certain solemnity in the way he puts his cross necklace around his neck. With it in place, he finally looks in your direction. There is a spot over your shoulder that he fixes his gaze upon.

"Forgive me, lady."

"You said my name for the first time."

He licks his lips and looks down as he clasps his dirty hands behind his back. Perhaps in another life, he'd let you lick them clean. "I did. For that, I am sorry."

"For that?" you echo.

"And for... for everything else."

You push yourself to your feet and walk over to him. He side-steps to prevent you from grasping him with your outstretched hands. It makes you want to cry. "Please don't apologise for anything. Just... let me hold you. Hold me. Please."

"I can't."

"Please."

Osferth's eyes are red. "I can't. Please, forgive me."

"Do you love me?"

The directness of your question catches him, and finally, with round, shining eyes, he meets your gaze. He looks wounded. "I... I don't know if that is of consequence."

Before you can even think about what you're doing, you touch his cheek with the hand you found completion with. He turns his head slightly and catches your damp fingers on his lips. His eyes close as a moan almost too quiet to hear escapes him. You move closer to him. "It's of consequence to me."

"I'm sorry," he breathes. "You deserve a man better than me."

"I want no man but you."

He hangs his head. "I will not damn you."

There is no chance to argue before he has left your room. You sit on the bed he has left rumpled. You press your night shift to your nose, and smell rosemary there. No matter how hard you try, you cannot catch his scent. He's not here. It's like he never was.

[rafyki]

Goth! Nico/ Surfer! Percy AU Part 8!

Hi, sorry for the wait!! I was a little in doubt about if making this chapter in Percy's or Nico's POV, tbh, but in the end I decided that we're back to Percy! I always enjoy writing him being all smitten and in love <33

Enjoy~

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7

You can also read it on AO3!!

~~~~

Percy had been looking at his phone for what felt like hours, staring at the empty message box and the name written on top, trying to find something, anything, to write that wouldn't sound extremely lame.

He knew his friends were looking at him, probably thinking he was the most ridiculous lovesick fool they had ever seen - which was fair, honestly, because Percy did feel like he was one second away from screaming into the void and starting to roll around on the cafe’s floor. 

So, yes, he was a lovesick fool - but a lovesick fool with his crush's number now safely saved into his phone.

Crush.

It had been two days since his meeting with Nico at the beach, and for the whole time Percy had felt like the word wasn't right, wasn't nearly heavy enough to embrace the way he felt. When he had told Annabeth, she had looked at him and smiled.

“I can see that, Percy, but you do realize you barely know him, don't you?”

It was true, of course it was - yet it didn't matter.

Percy could still feel the warmth of Nico's hand in his like it was engraved on his skin. The need to hold it again was almost overwhelming, Percy could feel himself going crazy for it.

They had held hands, and it had felt like Nico hadn't wanted to let go either, that he had wanted to make the contact last as long as possible just like Percy had.

Percy wanted to text him. But what do you even write to the guy who's been haunting your mind for the past few months and who you aren't exactly friends with but at the same time it feels like you're so much more?

“Hi, it's Percy, how are you?” 

Yeah, no, that was lame. 

“Hey, would you like to go on a date with me?”

Too forward, definitely not.

Percy groaned, frustrated.

“I swear to god, Jackson, if you don't stop staring at that phone right now, I'm gonna kick you out of this place”.

Thalia's voice pulled him violently out of his thoughts.

“This is a public space, Thalia, you can't kick me out”, he replied without even looking at her.

“Oh yeah, watch me”.

Percy only looked up at her when a kick did actually hit his legs under the table.

“Ehi!”

Thalia smirked down at him. “Told ya”, she said. “I can't believe I only come here like two times a year - and when I do, you're too busy to look at your phone to actually talk to me? That's low, Jackson”.

Percy rolled his eyes, but the pull in his guts let him know that he did feel guilty. He sighed and finally put his phone down, straightening himself and going back to sip his coffee. Not that he would apologize to Thalia, but he could admit to himself that she was right; and after all, if he put aside for a moment his current concern, he really was happy to see her. It had been months since the last time they had the chance to hang out together like this.

“Don't mind him, Thalia”, Annabeth jumped in. “He just got his dream boy's number! And now he's trying to figure out what to write to him”.

She said it like it was ridiculous, but Percy remembered how happy she had been for him when he had told her about the events of two days ago, so he didn't take it to heart.

“His what!?”, Thalia almost screamed, accompanying every word with a painful slap on Percy's shoulder. “Why don't I know anything about this! How could you guys not tell me, come on!”

He swatted her hand away. “Ouch, ow, ow, okay, alright!”

“I can't believe this! I can't even remember the last time you had a crush”.

“Yeah, well”, Percy said, and lowered his eyes. “Doesn't really feel like a crush, anymore”. 

“Oh woah, then it must be serious”, she said. “Come on, tell me everything”.

And so he told her - told her about the first time he saw the pretty goth boy working at the beach kiosk, about how long he had spent just looking at him. Trying to leave out the most embarrassing parts was no use because of course Annabeth had to jump in to point out how ridiculous he had been the whole time and how much he had panicked to just go and talk to him to buy something, and obviously she couldn't leave out his plan to impress Nico with his fantastic surfing moves.

“Annabeth, stop making me look like a loser!”

“I'm not making you look like a loser, Seaweed brain, I’m just telling the truth!”.

Percy kept talking, and he kept thinking about Nico, and he knew that he had the most enamored smile painted on his lips as he spoke. He talked and he couldn't stop because, god, he did love to talk about him.

They had only seen each other the previous day and Percy missed him already. He definitely needed to find the courage to text him - perhaps he didn't need to think too much about it, maybe a simple hey how are you would do, after all.

He wondered if Nico was doing the same, looking at his phone and trying to find something to write to him, or maybe waiting and hoping for a text to arrive.

He was so focused on recounting everything that he didn't notice the way Thalia's expression went from curious to surprised, then to confused, and finally to pensive.

“Wait, what did you say this guy's name is?”

Percy stopped in his rambling. “Nico, his name’s Nico”, he said, and finally noticed how Thalia seemed to be deep in thought. “What’s that face?”

It took a moment for her to reply. “Nico as in… Nico Di Angelo?”

Percy stopped and looked at her like she had grown a second head. “What?”

Next to him, he heard Annabeth’s voice echoing the same sentiment.

“What are you talking about?”

“Goth boy, shortie, long hair and lots of piercings, doesn’t seem like he own anything but black clothes, looks like he doesn’t know how to smile-”

“Hey, I’ll let you know that he has the prettiest smile you could ever imagine!”

Thalia waved him off at the same time that Annabeth said “Yes that does sound exactly like him”.

“And he works at the beach kiosk with a blond guy?”

A long moment of silence passed during which Percy kept staring at Thalia as her words kept swarming around in his head, blinking at her trying to process what she had just said. 

It couldn’t be, could it?

“You know him!?”

Percy could feel his heart run around in his chest, pumping blood loudly in his ears.

That felt so much like fate. 

“Huh, kind of?”, Thalia said. “I saw him a couple of times when I went to visit my brother”.

“Your brother?”, Annabeth asked.

Thalia nodded, smiling. “The blond guy working at the kiosk. That’s my brother, Jason”.

Another moment of silence passed before Percy finally came to his senses. “What the hell, why didn’t you tell us!”

This time, it was his turn to swat Thalia’s arm over and over. She hit back with just as much strength.

“Ow, why would I tell you! I didn’t even know you guys went to that beach - see, your fault you don’t tell me anything!”

Percy could feel Annabeth rolling her eyes at their antics.

But he had more pressing things to think about. He couldn’t believe it- really? 

It was so stupid, feeling giddy for something like this, but Percy couldn’t help the smile that rose to his lips. They were connected.

You’re so ridiculous, Percy Jackson, so ridiculous, he told himself, as his heart danced in his chest.

“Nico Di Angelo”, he murmured to himself. 

He knew his friends were looking at him ready to laugh at him. He looked at Annabeth. “See? I told you he must be an angel!”

They did laugh at him at that, and Percy felt so light he joined them. 

“You really are so ridiculous, Seaweed Brain”.

“Hey, can’t a man be a little in love?”

They stopped in their laughter to stare at him, and it took Percy a moment to realize what he had said. He felt himself blush - he hadn’t even admitted it to himself yet, yet the words had felt way too natural on his tongue, leaving his lips without him even thinking about it.

“Percy….”

“I know”, he cut her off, looking away. For some reason, his hand felt warm. “I know, I don’t know him all that well and it’s too soon. But… that’s why I said a little”.

“So you like him for real, huh?”. Thalia asked. The look in her eyes was earnest in a way that Percy wasn’t very used to. He and Thalia had been friends for a long time now, but it wasn’t often that they ended up talking seriously to each other.

Percy nodded. He really didn’t think he had ever liked anyone like he liked Nico before.

“Now, I don’t know him too well”, Thalia said. “But Jason told me once that it took him a pretty long time to get close to him ‘cause Nico isn’t an easy person - so, from what I know and from what you told me, I can say that you are an exception to this rule”.

Percy’s heart was running miles.

He thought about Nico so easily talking to him, smiling at him, thought of him asking about him out of worry, of him taking his hand and getting in the ocean with him despite his fear of it.

“I can ask Jason about him, if you want. But”, Thalia continued, pointing a finger at him. “You better text him - today”.

~~

When he went home that evening, the phone felt heavy in his head.

He would see Nico tomorrow anyway, he didn’t have to text him, he could easily wait until he could talk to him face to face. Or he could simply wait until tomorro’s evening and see if Nico would be at the beach after his shift again. He could.

It didn’t feel like the right thing to do. It felt like the coward way out, the one that wouldn’t lead to anything more.

And so, before he could think too much about it, he pressed send.

Me: Ehi, Nico! You have the afternoon shift tomorrow, right? Let’s hang out at the beach again after it?

[musings-of-a-rose]

Jump Then Fall - Part 3

Pairing: Javier Peña x ofc “Vanessa Morales”

Word Count: 3600+

Rating: M for mature - 18+ only!

Warnings: Please be aware there is an 11 year age gap. Mature themes and some canon mentioned. Just like ao3, “creator chooses not to use warnings.” If you click Keep Reading, that means you agree that you’re the age to handle mature themes. Also by clicking Keep Reading, you understand warnings may not be complete in order to avoid spoilers for the story.

Notes: When the story starts, Vanessa is 19 and Javier is 30.

**Shoutout to @VaneMando15 for listening and bouncing ideas from me, and for her guidance with being a Latina herself. Without her, this wouldn’t even be a thing, just another line on my WIP spreadsheet. And also to my husband, who is also Latino and answered any questions I had (along with taking me to Colombia back in 2014). And to @wyn-n-tonic, who listened to my rambles and insecurities about writing an oc in first person.

**If you want to be added to the taglist, join here or let me know!

❤If you enjoy the fic, please consider giving me a warm beverage! (It is not required in any way!)

Jump Then Fall Masterlist

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Javier Peña Masterlist

<<Part 2<<

He's coming back. Chucho is bringing Javier back after 6 years. What do I say? How do I tell him he has a son who is already 6 years old? Will he even remember me? Will he want to be a part of mine and Alex's life or will he turn and run?

My mind spirals as I finish drying the last few pans before putting them away. I head upstairs, my brain going through a million different scenarios before I take a quick glance in the mirror. I smooth down my hair and put on a new outfit, a simple summer dress that goes down to my knees, and end up randomly tidying and cleaning the house, never settling on one spot.

I knew this day would come. I guess I just never thought about it specifically. 6 years ago, I was so sure of my choice not to tell him, that I wouldn't want him distracted in Colombia but I wouldn't want him to come home and resent us for forcing his choice. But a part of me, ok a large part of me, feels guilty for not giving him the choice.

I hear Chucho's truck pull up outside and my heart starts beating faster. The truck doors slam and muted voices make their way to the front door. I pick up the book on the counter in front of me and open it, my eyes not taking in a word but I didn't want to look like I was waiting around for them. For him.

"...'m fine. You don't have to b-baby me."

"I'm just trying to make sure you don't vomit on the clean floors."

He's drunk. I can tell by the way his words are slurred, his feet thunking across the wood floors in a sporadic pattern. Before I can move, he stumbles through the kitchen doorway, his eyes taking a few moments to focus on me.

"Who are you?"

My hearts sinks a little. I would've been surprised if he remembered me, but I'd be lying if I said it didn't hurt.

"Vanessa."

He steps closer to me, his eyes scanning my body before settling on mine.

"Are you fucking my dad?"

"Uh, no. I-"

"Ok, Javi. Time for bed. Vanessa will be here later for you to question," Chucho claps his hands on Javier's shoulders and guides him towards the doorway.

"Ok, ok. I have more questions later, Vanessssssa."

I give him a little wave as he disappears through the doorway. Chucho struggles to get him up the stairs, but eventually the sounds of them arguing disappear and I'm left alone for the moment. I turn around, gripping the counter with both of my hands and take several deep breaths.

He doesn't remember me. Or maybe it's because he's drunk? How do I handle it now?

His eyes, though filled with the drink, held a lot of anger and regret. He's hurting. I can't imagine what he's seen or had to do in persuit of Escobar. Chucho walks back in, breaking me from my thoughts.

"Sorry about him. He doesn't usually get drunk like that."

I wave my hand. "It's fine. I imagine he's been through a lot."

"Still, it's not an excuse to act like an asshole...he's going to be out for a bit but I'm thinking hamburgers for dinner? Something greasy to help that hangover he's going to have."

"Sounds good."

Chucho studies me for a moment. "How are you?"

That's a good question. "I...I'm not entirely sure."

"You need to tell him."

I nod. "Of course. But I can't tell him when he's drunk."

He chuckles. "No, I suppose not. But soon, ok?"

I give him a small smile before moving to get out the ingredients to bake some hamburger buns. Chucho moves to the living room, the tv turning on a moment later. He flips the channel and the news report echoes through the doorway to me.

"Breaking news! Pablo Escobar has just been killed. This is live footage of the rooftop where he was killed by DEA agent Steve Murphy..."

I step into the living room, watching the live broadcast of the rooftops where the outline of a dead man lays splaid on the tiles, other men in tach vests surrounding him. A blonde man high fives someone as the news anchor continues their report. But then it dawns on me.

Javier is not there, finally catching Escobar after 6 years of chasing him. He's here. No wonder he's drunk. What happened?

"Why is Javier here, Chucho?"

He's quiet a moment. "I don't know."

I return to the kitchen, mixing the dough before forming the buns. I can't imagine working for 6 years trying to catch one of the most elusive men, only to be forced away at the very end, not even being allowed to be there for his capture. I'd lose my mind too. I know I need to tell him about Alex, but I also need to give him a moment with this.

But how long of a moment?

-------

It takes 3 days for Javier to come out of a drunken stupor. I hear his bedroom door open as he stumbles down the hall with a groan, the bathroom door closing behind him. I hear a slam from the bathroom, sounding like the toilet lid. I wipe my hands on my apron and head upstairs, hesitating for a moment outside of the bathroom door. I knock very gently.

"Javier? Are you alright?"

A grunt followed by another violent heaving sound answers me. I turn the handle, slowly pushing the door open as the heaving subsides. Javier slumps against the side of the bathtub, his hand moving around to find the handle to flush the toilet. His hair is rumpled, his eyes mostly closed, clad only in a pair of sweatpants. I walk over to the toilet and close the lid, flushing the toilet for him. His hand drops to his lap and he takes a couple of deep breaths.

"Thanks."

"Of course. Do you want help up?"

He cracks his eyes open and looks at me. "You're not my dad."

"That I am not."

He lifts his head, opening his eyes a little more before hissing and closing them, squeezing the bridge of his nose. "The fucking light is going to kill me."

"Well I can't do anything about the light coming in this window. But let's get you back to your room in bed. You'll feel better."

I wait a few moments while he gathers himself, extending my hand to help him up. He squints at me and I roll my eyes.

"Just take my hand. I'm stronger than I look."

He takes it and I have to hold back a gasp as his large hands engulf my small ones, the warmth from the contact sparking all sorts of thoughts and memories. I pull him to his feet and he leans on me as I help him back to his room, pulling back the sheets as he slides in. I pull all of his curtains firmly shut, only using the light from the hallway to see around. Javier settles into bed, groaning a little as he puts his hand on his stomach.

"I'll bring you some water and pain meds."

"Oh you don't have-"

"That wasn't a question."

I head back downstairs, getting a glass of water. I stop by the bathroom again, opening the medicine cabinet and getting out some pain meds. I also pull out the bottle of activated charcoal tablets that Chucho handed me shortly after Javier came home. He said they suck to choke down but they'd really help the hangover. I carry everything to his room, shaking out the right amount of charcoal tablets. Javier sits up with another groan, taking the pills and the glass of water.

"This isn't aspirin."

"No. It's activated charcoal. Chucho said it will really help your hangover. You can't take it with any meds though as it'll just absorb those."

"I'll just take the aspirin."

"I really think you need to take the charcoal."

He looks up at me. "I don't even know who you are why the fuck would I listen to you?"

"Because I just carried your stubborn self all the way from the bathroom after you puked your guts out. I'm just trying to help. Take the damn pills."

He studies me through squinted eyes. "Yes ma'am." He chokes down the pills and makes a disgusted face before drinking several sips of water. "Those taste terrible."

"I never claimed they tasted good. So let those do their work and get some rest. When you're ready, come downstairs and I'll make you something to eat."

He looks at me again, his eyebrows slightly furrowed together in concentration. "No really, who are you?"

"Vanessa. Now get some rest."

He lays back and I pull the blanket up, giving him a small smile when I catch him looking at me. I leave the room and head back downstairs, finishing up some of the lesson planning I was doing for the upcoming semester.

A few hours later, Javier comes downstairs, this time with a shirt. Although he only has the bottom 3 buttons done up. I'm not sure why he even bothered with a shirt. Not that I'm complaining. He stands there awkwardly, like he doesn't know what to do.

"Feeling better?" I ask, turning to face him from my stool at the kitchen island.

"Yeah. Those charcoal things worked really well."

"Good. I've never been hungover so I wasn't sure, but I figured Chucho knew what he was talking about. Are you hungry?"

"I uh...I'm not sure," his hand goes to his stomach, his face souring slightly.

I head over to the slow cooker on the counter. "I made some chicken noodle soup. If anything, you can sip on the broth?" I look over at him, his head cocked to the side, watching me.

"Javier?"

"What? Oh soup. Yeah. Sure."

I ladle him a bowl and grab some saltines and set them on a little plate next to his bowl and set it in front of him. I also set down a glass filled with cloudy looking water.

"Coconut water?" Javier asks skeptically.

I shrug. "My mom always gave it to me during and after a cold. Said it gave me back nutrients. I figure alcohol probably takes a fair amount of nutrients from you. So it should help."

"Hhmm. Guess we'll find out." He takes a tentative sip from the cup, licking his lips a little after. "Hey that's sitting alright."

I give him a small smile. "Good."

Before I can move, he grabs my arm and gives it a little squeeze, sending jolts of electricity through me. "Thank you."

"Y-you're welcome."

I sit and pull my planner and books to me, resuming my task of lesson planning. I can feel his eyes on me, like he's studying me. I wish he would find something else more interesting.

"What are you doing?"

I don't look up. "Lesson planning for this upcoming semester."

He takes a slurp of his soup and swallows it. "Teacher? Holy shit this soup is amazing."

I look up at him as he takes another bite, his eyes closing for a moment as he savors the soup.

"Yeah. I'm teaching 2nd grade this year."

"Sounds fun. Seriously, what did you do to this soup?"

"My mom taught me how to cook," My eyes sting and my heart hurts thinking of those memories.

"Well, she did a damn good job."

"Sometimes she got it right."

He looks up at me. "Oh. I'm sorry I touched a nerve."

I wave my hand. "It's ok. I've come to terms with it."

He sets his spoon down, all of his focus on me. His gaze is intense, that little furrow between his brow is back. "You look-"

"Good you're awake, puto. Put some pants on and come help me." Chucho walks in the back door, stomping his boots on the mat outside before stepping in.

"I don't know if I-"

"Come on, son. No more babying I gave you time. Now I need your young bones."

"You sound like a bruja." (witch). But Javier pushes back from the island and starts to grab his plate.

"Don't worry about it, I got it." I stand, leaning over to take the bowl and plate, noticing that he'd eaten all of it. "I have more if you want some."

His dark eyes bore into mine, fanning a flame inside of me. "I want whatever you give me, Vanessa."

SMACK! Chucho slaps Javier on the back of his head.

"What the fuck?"

"Stop flirting and come help me before these chickens run halfway to Mexico."

-------

Chucho and Javier are gone for a few more hours and return just as the sun is setting. I hang up the phone, having had my nightly call with Alex, who is having a blast at science camp. The men kick off their work boots and coats, trudging upstairs to shower.

"Dinner will be ready soon so don't take long!" I yell after them.

Chucho devours the steak I'd made him while Javier opts to have another couple bowls of soup. Before long, Chucho leans back, slapping his stomach.

"Well, I am tired. Gonna get an early sleep. Vanessa? Delicious, as usual. Night, everyone."

"Good night, Chucho."

While he heads upstairs, I start to clean up, Javier immediately moving to help me. I shake my head.

"Nope. I got this."

"I can help."

"Really, it's ok."

"Are you always this stubborn?

"Are you?"

He looks at me before he smirks, but then it's gone just as fast. Man am I fucked.

"I can dry?"

"I appreciate the offer, but really. I'm ok."

"Does washing the dishes relax you or something?"

I know he said it in jest, but now that I think about it, it kind of does. The warm, soapy water calms me down. Gives me space to think.

"Yeah sort of."

He puts his hands up. "Say no more. I don't want to intrude." Did he just wink at me? Javier heads from the kitchen and I hear the front door open, the screen door slapping closed behind him.

After I'm done with the dishes, I dry my hands, thinking. I grab another glass of coconut water and head towards the front door, hesitating for several moments before pushing open the screen. Javier sits on the swing bench, facing out to look over the front half of the farm, a cigarette lit and in between his fingers. He takes a long drag, his lips rounding to blow out the smoke.

"I thought you should hydrate again." I hold up the glass and he turns to look at me, his eyes coming back into focus. He beckons me to him and I walk up, handing him the glass.

"That's a nasty habit, you know," I nod towards the cigarette in his hand.

He shrugs. "You have your relaxing activity, and I have mine." Still, he leans forward and puts it out on the tray he'd set on the arm of the bench. "Come. Sit."

I take a breath and sit, our thighs nearly touching. The air feels electrified, like it's waiting for something to happen. We sit like this for a while, staring out at the cows grazing in the front fields, Javier lightly rocking the swing as he rolls his foot back and forth.

"Thank you for...everything. Taking care of me and..everything." He turns his head to look at me in the light coming in through the windows from the house.

"It's not a problem. Anyone would do it."

He snorts. "Not for me."

"And why not?"

He pauses a moment. "I'm not a good guy."

"Well I know that's not true. You're a great man, Javier." I place my hand on his forearm without thinking, and squeeze. He looks down at where I touch him, placing his hand over mine before looking at me.

"I'm really not. I just..." He trails off, his eyes sweeping over my face. "You...you look familiar. It's been killing me for days."

Well. Now is the time. For this confession, at least.

"That's because we know each other."

His brow furrows slightly. "I had a feeling. From where?"

It still hurts a little that he doesn't remember, even though I know it's a trauma response. Memory loss and PTSD can often go hand in hand.

"You...you gave me a rose, once."

Recognition immediately ripples over his face, his eyes widening, his eyebrows raising a little as he shifts his body to face me.

"Vanessa? From the bar? Right before I left for Colombia?"

I smile nervously. "That's me."

"Summer of new things Vanessa?"

I nod. "Yup. Me."

His eyes are twinkling now, a small smile creeping up his face. "Holy shit! I never thought I'd see you again. It was so hard to walk away from you that morning. The only thing that did it was the fact that the DEA would come down on me hard for missing that flight." His eyes soften the longer he looks in mine and for a moment, we're both transported back to that night, the night he opened up my world.

"H-how are you?" He's hesitant, but his eyes are wide and curious.

"Not bad."

"How did you end up here? I thought you were going back to-" he waves his hand around trying to think. "Austin?"

"Corpus Christi."

He snaps his fingers. "That was it."

Do I tell him about Alex? About being a father? Something inside me tells me to wait. To only surprise Javier with one thing at a time. He's been through so much and the last thing I want to do is pile more on top of that.

"It's a long story but I...got pregnant and my parents..well, they didn't approve. Out of wedlock. Anyway, they kicked me out and I uh, ended up here. Chucho I guess took pity on me and gave me a place to stay. I offered to cook and clean for him which of course he argued against, but," I shrug. "And so I stayed. He demanded I return to college and get my teaching degree I had been working on and he babysat Alex while I did. I owe him so much. My life, basically. I don't know how I'll be able to repay him."

His eyes grew serious. "You're parents kicked you out pregnant?"

I nod. "Yeah."

"That's fucked. Sorry, but it is."

I shrug. "They were the kind of parents that would scrub my mouth out with soap and make me repeat scripture if I had nail polish on so I guess I'm not surprised. I've made peace with it."

"Still. I'm sorry that happened to you."

"Thanks."

We sit in silence for another few moments, one weight on my chest lifted but a very heavy one still remaining.

"The dad didn't help?"

Here's your chance, Vanessa. You can tell him now, despite everything. Tell him. TELL. HIM.

"He...He had other things to do."

Javier scoffs. "What an asshole."

I shake my head vehemently. "No, it's not..they were very important."

"More important than knocking up a young woman?"

"I think so."

"I'm sure."

I turn to face him more directly. "What if it was yo-"

RING RING! RING RING!

The phone cuts through our conversation, forcing an ending that I wasn't ready for. Javier attempts to stand but I put my hand out.

"It might be Alex. I've got it."

I feel his eyes on me as I go inside, answering the phone quickly. It wasn't Alex but some automated political message and I grunt, hanging up the phone in frustration. I should go back outside and explain everything to him, confess it all, but I don't. I do peak my head back outside and call his name, momentarily flustered when he looks at me.

"It was some political something."

"I fucking hate those."

"I'm going upstairs. Drink that coconut water." I point to the untouched glass in his hand and he holds it up towards me.

"Yes, ma'am."

-------

>>Chapter 4>>

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