#now back to fandom posting hopefully

[holyhikari]

some personal reflection on my late diagnosis and a few other stuff that might interest somebody or not.

I don't have ADHD, at least not "formally." I'm usually fine with not having qualified for an official ADHD diagnosis during my evaluation (even though a few professionals have argued that I should have had + my medication is ADHD-focused and it works) because I usually just need sensory/social accommodations and ASD covers that.

But it's absurd HOW LONG it took for me and the people around me to notice and accept how mentally hyperactive I am, because it carried me through my early academic life. So I was just "a very bright kid", not a single adult could tell (or, at least, no one thought of it as an issue) I was hyperfocused on and a bit obsessive about school because most subjects interested me, I couldn't control that drive nor my perfectionism and the good grades/the praise for them made me feel better about not understanding how to socialize with most other kids because they acted in ways that didn't make any sense and I was adamant that all of my actions could be reasonably explained to others since I was like five years old. So, yeah, we couldn't relate. I got along well with the weirdos though.

It's funny in a tragic way that sometimes adults can't tell you have socialization problems because you're well-spoken and mimic their communication patterns and don't have trouble following their instructions, but I assure you that the other kids CAN very much tell that you're not like them. (Fun fact: my mom DID notice that most other kids confused me and she was aware of/tried to help me through the bullying I suffered, but whenever I asked her opinion on the matter she just went "oh sweetie that's because you're around adults often and in this household we're all like this :D so it's only expected". LOL)

And since I couldn't have known that often overthinking to the point of tears AS A PRE-SCHOOLER (yes, I have memories of that) wasn't normal and assumed that everyone else had that many thoughts per second... well. That mental hyperactivity paired with the skills related to my special interest (linguistics) served me well until I crashed and suddenly had to navigate the world without the "high results" it allowed me to achieve as a kid.

And now I'm an adult who struggles with basic tasks like a toddler because I can't prioritize anything correctly unless I'm at gunpoint. And I'm perpetually underestimating my struggles, I try to convince myself on a daily basis that I'm just a regular 20-something mess in this world and that every young adult is like this simply because growing up is hard, so I must be trying to find excuses to be "lazy".

At least I know this experience isn't uncommon at all with late-diagnosed neurodivergent people.

I think I want to write more about my experiences. I might keep those reflections here since I (FINALLY) ditched T*itter and I don't want to do it anywhere with my IRL name. I feel even safer/detached here, typing in English instead of my first language has that effect xD

[biblically-accurate-dca]

substitute

[blitzwhore]

It's always fun experiencing severe mental illness symptoms because of fiction, eh?

[ironicsoap]

you are expendable, you are not expected to return

[the-sky-queen]

So there I was. Two new fandoms joining Sonic inside my head and two new AUs planned to go with them. Then, everything changed when an old fandom that I haven't been in for years rose up out of nowhere and decided to consume all my attention.

*coughs* So anyway yeah, I started writing for it. I'm 8,000 words in and it still isn't quite done help XD

[babyboywilson]

happiness is having someone comment that your writing is beautiful when you’ve been insecure to get back to writing again

[purple8cat]

I THOUGHT THIS PART FROM VNC CHAPTER 62 LOOKED FAMILIAR

i mean they're not. the exact same but they are very similar to each other!!

Also this could just be me but I feel like that these two have a lot of parallels. Break's family are the Rainsworths, who are not his biological family. Johann's family is Dante and Riche, who also not his biological family.

When someone they care about dies/gets threaten their first instinct is murder. When the Sinclairs died Break killed 116 people to bring them back, and when he thought Reim had been permanently dead he killed Fang. When Vanitas had threaten to kill Dante, Johann told him that he'll kill him if he meddles with his family.

Another thing they have in common is that there both, how do I put this, angry in some way/some point in their life? Break had been bitter and depress after returning from the Abyss but then learned to smile again because of Shelly. Johann... Okay, I can't say much about Johann because not much has been revealed about him yet BUT he definitely is sketchy!! With how the Dhampirs are treated it wouldn't be far off to say he would be angry at the world/society. He also has been shown to not like Noé much. Johann has also been shown to be very protective of Dante and Riche, so it's possible that he could've been similar to how Break had acted in the past, and now has something to live for and would do ANYTHING to protect it.

Another thing I'm just now realizing and probably should've brought up first but they have similar vibes/atmospheres. Though Johann is more flirtatious and Break is more... Weird. I guess. Eccentric, if you want a fancy word. They're also have this whole... How do I explain it? They're good at observing/analyzing things is I guess the best way to explain it?

I think I'm gonna stop there, there was something else I kind of wanted to talk about but I think it was a little bit of a stench fkdjgfjdf. I could be wrong about some of these, I didn't mean to write this much so basically all of it I wrote on a whim. Whatever my brain thought of I wrote down which resulted in this (which reading over it might be noticeable considering this post is kinda a mess kgjkfjgjfj). There's also the fact that some of the Johann stuff was just speculation, which could 100% be wrong. But I do think some of it I'm right about!!

[svtskneecaps]

so what i'm putting together from osmosis and the wonderful livebloggers and the incredible arkanis english updates account is something like this

Prefeito Jota: Hello, I'd like to hire you to investigate what happened in my city/island(?)!

Bagi, who was previously "invited" to a mysterious island/city by its elected official, subsequently trapped on the mysterious island/city, investigated the deep mysterious history of the island/city, came to no conclusions, found her brother after years of searching, was separated once again from her brother, gained and lost an adopted daughter (possibly to being kidnapped by the island government, which was evil), gained and lost a demon fiancée (possibly to being dragged back to hell, so there's no way to find her), gained and lost a close demon friend to dubious circumstance (did he die for his children? is he with skeppy in the gas station?), and has had an unknown amount of time to process and/or suppress all of this: Sure! :D

[seamayweed]

- the first is an ask about mad dog, when there were still only 3 fics in english for the choi kang-woo/kim min-joon pairing, mine included (mine, actually, being the first one in english); the two characters kiss in every single one of these fics.

- the second is a conversation in the replies of an mctna post about a banghwi scene. while the ship is personally not my cup of tea, it is an excellent and strongly canonically implied pairing and it makes me angry on behalf of the amazing, extremely talented authors who do write fic for this underrepresented ship. whether the complaint is about the first few pages of bangwhi fics (which only span two pages) or the first few pages of mctna fics in general, i don't recall a single one of them being objectively 'bad' - just bc it might not be your cup of tea and some of the tags might squick you out, doesn't mean it's 'bad'. and even if it was, who's to say the fics aren't still someone's favorite, akin to a gem they've found bc they were looking exactly for a story like this for years?

i'm just... so tired. why do ppl do this? why do they love to dunk on others' fics and hard work so much? do they think that tumblr is magically devoid of ao3 fic authors and that we won't stumble on these conversations and disparaging comments about our fics, especially if the posts can be found in the very public main tags?

not to mention that the fandoms in question are already extreeeeemely tiny and the fic for them is already very rare. can't we even muster up some bare modicum of fandom etiquette and respect in small fandoms like these? i would go on to say that while it's perfectly fine to not like a fic and talk about it, these are conversations that should have been best kept in private DMs - or at least outside of the main tags.

the thing is it's super, super discouraging and does the very opposite of making more ppl feel inclined to write for your favorite small fandom or rare pair. with some ppl tending to be so harsh and judgemental (and honestly entitled) when it comes to fic, it doesn't surprise me at all that so many ppl are so insecure about their writing that they don't dare to post their fics for fear of not being 'good' enough. i find that really sad since fic is all about having fun and doing something you love and sharing that joy with others!! it's not about being objectively 'bad' or 'good'. and tbh i've never read a fic that i can't say at least one (1) good thing about.

so why don't we do more of that instead of complaining about fic where everyone can see it?

[halfbaked00q]

catboy ask anon here. sorry i didn't mean to make u feel bad!! saw a mention of ficlets in your bio so i thought u wrote fic. mb. dont let me interrupt ur vibing <3

Oooh, hi babes! Thank you for coming back and clarifying the tone/intent/context and yea like I acknowledged,,, it kind of was me being bitchy about it :') and also I think whoopsie it might have been a bit of a NOO THAT'S THE THING IM SENSITIVE ABOUT.jpg kinda thing lmao,,, also since I'm pondering self-reflectedly, ig I don't do well without context due to personal stuff probs (lets face it, it's the mother; when is it not the mother- but yea,, ig when I get not enough context I jump to *narrows eyes* is this a trojan horse...)

but also lol,. Ahhhh okay I see where the confusion may have come from!! Unfortunately lmao, I have nothing so realized or respectable as a ficLET to my name,,. no, you see but alas, the bio says ficBIT,. as in.. crumbs lol. I have like the leftover scraps of cake after you make cake jars. and sometimes I squish them into cake pops!! but often I just serve them up as is,. bone apple teeth <3 still yummy, I hope! but you are indeed spooning alternate mouthfuls of cake bits & frosting here lol

[stick-by-me]

Metallic super chicks!

[doodlingwren]

It's 2024 can we please stop saying it's normal to trace or copying an entire drawing and pretending it's 100% your work? Just bc you changed the character or added clothes on a base you found on pinterest it doesn't mean you created original art

Edit: I need to specifying some things, or somebody might misinterpret this post in the future.

Tracing and copying are more than okay to use if you need to exercise or study stuff! Copying might be a bit better because you're actually training your eye and hand on how to make shapes and volumes. My best advice is, if you trace something, keep it for yourself and don't post it online (if you do, ask the original artist if they're okay with it)

Always use references, especially for anatomy stuff! It's not a cheat! Poses are complicated, and there are a lot of photographers posting pose packs FOR FREE TO USE! Or even artists drawing them :)

Remember to read the TERMS OF SERVICE when using a photo/ base you've found online: some people want credits, others are fine without them! But you have to check to know, and please be respectful

YCH (your character here) are NOT free to use bases; please know that. They are artwork from other artist showcasing a type of commission they are doing. And neither are WIPs

do NOT trust stuff you find on Pinterest. A great part of the artworks over there have been uploaded 1) without the artist consent and often 2) with a misleading use. Already happened to find other artist artworks or sketches being given out as "bases".

This post came from the fact some of the images used and traced were actually anatomy studies made by a very famous artist who requested for them not to be traced over (or if used like that, to give credits were it's due).

For the actual bases, they can be found on Twitter, and credits are required as well.

For that one traced artwork. It's actually a work in progress made by an artist, and I suppose it was uploaded on Pinterest, so some people might think of it as a base? Although it has on it "WIP" and the original artist name (if you've been drawing. You know exactly what those 2 things mean). The other things that bothered me it's while for the other there has been an attempt, this one it's traced 1 to 1. Didn't bother to change the character face at all. That's what makes me mad. Taking all the credits for something that you didn't do. That's just being lazy and not giving a fuck about art. Also they traced other artist's illustrations as well with their OCs so. I guess it's not just fandom art 😂

On a side note, this is something that I've seen happen quite a lot. And especially if you're doing commissions for a living, a trace accusation can destoy your carreer. Therefore, I won't tell this person a name or make a callout post. I did block them and moved on, and this was a vent post I had to do for myself.

[conditioned-to-be-a-friend]

hey sorry again guys for not postint for a while. it kinda feels like all my posts were just met with people being mean to me and it made me a little sad :((( im trying to get back into it but i just wanted to give you guys an update ad for why ive been so quite for so long ill be back soon i hope !! sorry to keep you waiting !!

[yes-that-would-be-dark]

UNLIKE BASICALLY EVERY DEATH NOTE CHARACTER, I PROMISE THIS BLOG IS NOT DEAD. I simply forgot it existed

[agenttexsflippedshit]

me, weeping out of sheer loneliness: what if i went and got a phd

[kameonerd566]

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