#novelty christmas jumper
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noisycowboyglitter · 3 months ago
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"Loch Ness Monster Unmasked: 10 Titles for its Grotesque Visage"
The concept of a "Loch Ness Monster Ugly" puts a humorous spin on the legendary cryptid said to inhabit Scotland's Loch Ness. This interpretation reimagines Nessie not as the sleek, mysterious creature of folklore, but as an endearingly unattractive beast.
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Picture a creature with mismatched features: bulging eyes, crooked teeth, and patchy, algae-covered skin. Its long neck might be knobbly and bent at odd angles, while its flippers could be comically small or disproportionately large. The monster's expression might be a goofy grin or a perpetually confused look, far from the intimidating visage often associated with cryptids.
This ugly Nessie could be the subject of quirky artwork, amusing merchandise, or even a character in a children's book teaching lessons about self-acceptance and the beauty of uniqueness. It plays on the idea that even legendary creatures might not live up to their mystical reputations.
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The "Loch Ness Monster Ugly" concept injects humor into cryptozoology, inviting people to laugh at the often serious pursuit of mythical beasts. It's a lighthearted take on a classic legend, appealing to those who appreciate offbeat humor and unconventional interpretations of well-known myths.
A Christmas jumper, also known as a Christmas sweater, is a festive garment that has become a beloved holiday tradition. These often deliberately over-the-top knitwear items feature bold, colorful designs celebrating the season's iconography.
Typical motifs include Santa Claus, reindeer, snowflakes, Christmas trees, and wrapped presents. Some jumpers incorporate quirky elements like 3D decorations, flashing lights, or even sound effects. Others may display humorous slogans or pop culture references with a holiday twist.
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While traditionally associated with kitsch and "ugly sweater" parties, many modern Christmas jumpers offer stylish designs for those seeking a more subtle festive look.
Wearing a Christmas jumper has become a fun way to express holiday spirit, whether at office parties, family gatherings, or casual outings during the season. It's a versatile item that can be both a conversation starter and a cozy addition to one's winter wardrobe.
Animated Christmas decorations bring holiday scenes to life with movement and often sound. These eye-catching ornaments range from small tabletop figurines to large outdoor displays. Common themes include Santa Claus waving or climbing a chimney, reindeer nodding their heads, elves working on toys, and snowmen swaying to music.
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Many feature LED lights, enhancing their visual appeal, especially at night. Some are battery-operated, while others plug into outlets. These decorations add a dynamic element to holiday setups, delighting both children and adults. They're popular for home interiors, storefronts, and public spaces, creating a magical, festive atmosphere wherever they're displayed.
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justzawe · 1 year ago
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Zawe Ashton for Marks & Spencer
“The thing I’m looking forward to most about Christmas this year is my table centrepiece. It doesn’t necessarily matter if people’s plates can fit on the table or not, it’s all about what’s on display in the middle for me.
I get very excited when it’s time to hang the stockings up, and I make everyone wear novelty jumpers on Christmas Eve. I really love to give a small present on Christmas Eve, open the stockings in the morning and then the presents under the tree later. My sister creates a personalised Christmas quiz for our family, which I always look forward to.
My least favourite thing about Christmas? I’m not a Brussels sprout fan. I want to be. I’ve tried so hard. Last year I tried to jazz them up with a recipe from a cookbook, but it just didn’t work – I didn’t commit enough.”
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dont-f-with-moogles · 11 months ago
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Thinking about Bungou Stray Dogs characters wearing novelty Christmas jumpers… 🎄🎁❄️
Atsushi Nakajima Blue and white design with the face of the white tiger. Printed underneath: ‘Merry Xmas, Ya Filthy Animal.’
Ryuunosuke Akutagawa Red and black design with an image of Atsushi’s tiger form, cut in half. Printed beneath: ‘Jinko All The Way.’
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dlabken · 1 month ago
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Game of Thrones House Baratheon Ugly Christmas Sweater: A Must-Have for the Holidays
As the festive season approaches, it’s time to elevate your holiday wardrobe with the Game of Thrones House Baratheon Ugly Christmas Sweater. Perfect for fans of the epic series, this unique Christmas knitwear combines the charm of traditional holiday apparel with the iconic themes of Game of Thrones. Whether you’re attending a Christmas party or cozying up at home, this sweater is a fantastic addition to your Game of Thrones Christmas wardrobe.
Why Choose the Game of Thrones Holiday Sweater?
The Game of Thrones holiday sweater is more than just a piece of clothing; it’s a statement. This Game of Thrones Christmas jumper is designed to keep you warm while showcasing your love for the series. Made from high-quality materials, the sweater features intricate designs representing House Baratheon, making it a standout choice for any fan.
Key Features:
Comfort and Warmth: Crafted from soft, durable fabric, this Game of Thrones winter sweater ensures comfort during the chilly holiday season.
Unique Design: The Game of Thrones themed Christmas sweater includes vibrant colors and detailed motifs that reflect the House Baratheon style, ensuring you look festive and stylish.
Versatility: Ideal for both men and women, this Game of Thrones Christmas apparel can be worn to holiday gatherings, casual outings, or cozy nights in.
Perfect for Every Holiday Occasion
Whether you're gearing up for a family get-together or a festive party with friends, the Game of Thrones House Baratheon Christmas pullover is perfect for any occasion. Its humorous design adds a playful touch to your holiday outfits, making it a fun choice for those who love to stand out.
Ideal for Christmas Parties
Dress it up with accessories or keep it simple; the Game of Thrones holiday knitwear pairs well with jeans, skirts, or even pajama bottoms for a laid-back look. Be the life of the party with this funny Game of Thrones House Baratheon Ugly Christmas Sweater, and you’ll surely spark conversations among fellow fans.
Where to Buy Your Game of Thrones Christmas Sweater
Looking for the best place to purchase your Game of Thrones House Baratheon Ugly Christmas Sweater for sale? Many online retailers offer a variety of styles, including the handmade Game of Thrones House Baratheon Ugly Christmas Sweater and other unique options.
Shopping Options:
Online Retailers: Check out popular sites for a Game of Thrones House Baratheon Christmas cardigan or holiday pullover. You’ll find options for both men and women.
Specialty Stores: Look for the Game of Thrones House Baratheon Christmas fashion in local shops for a more personalized experience.
Conclusion: Celebrate the Season in Style
This holiday season, embrace your fandom with the Game of Thrones House Baratheon Ugly Christmas Sweater. It’s not just a piece of clothing; it’s a way to celebrate your love for the series while staying warm and festive. From Game of Thrones Christmas novelty sweaters to Game of Thrones House Baratheon festive fashion, there’s something for everyone. Don’t miss out on this opportunity to enhance your Game of Thrones holiday outfit collection. Order your unique Game of Thrones House Baratheon Ugly Christmas Sweater online today and be ready to showcase your love for Westeros this Christmas!
View Product: https://dinounicorn.com/product/game-of-thrones-house-baratheon-ugly-christmas-sweater/
Home Page: https://dinounicorn.com
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spaceshipsoutthepool · 11 months ago
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Quick, need some novelty and /or awful slogans for Christmas jumpers and shirts please? Be as punny as you like
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spotsandsocks · 1 year ago
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Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love ❤️
thank you my love 💕 I got asked twice so im going to be cheeky do two the first one here was fics i love but not everyone's cup of tea. These are my favorite more mainstream fics
Inappropriate Use of Federal Funding
Eddie runs to the airport to stop Buck leaving. It’s a classic!
Sweater Number 23 Christmas fluff with novelty jumpers/sweaters
Of Mice and Men a proposal fic where plans do not go as Buck expected
Reach For Me and I'll Reach For You angst Buck’s hurt on a call and Eddie won’t leave him. As far as Eddie’s concerned they get out together or not at all.
Alone With Your Thoughts more angst - Buck’s hurt and this time Eddie has to leave him. Waiting for help Buck talks to someone he’s never met who tries to keep him alive - a bit of a coma fix
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catb-fics · 1 year ago
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Idk why but I can imagine Van loving all the old classic cheesy Christmas songs, like I Wish It Could Be Christmas Everyday and Merry Xmas Everybody 🎄 🤣
I think he’d like the classics too!
I wonder if he has a Christmas jumper and novelty Christmas socks 😆
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dinounicornst1 · 2 months ago
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Festivus For The Rest Of Us Ugly Christmas Sweater
Festivus For The Rest Of Us Ugly Christmas Sweater
Embrace the Quirky Spirit of Festivus
Are you ready to celebrate the most unconventional holiday of the season? The Festivus For The Rest Of Us Ugly Christmas Sweater is your go-to apparel for standing out at any holiday gathering. Inspired by the iconic Seinfeld episode, this Festivus sweater embraces the humor and spirit of the Festivus celebration. Say goodbye to traditional holiday wear and hello to the ultimate ugly Christmas sweater that brings laughter and joy.
Why Choose the Festivus Sweater?
A Unique Holiday Statement
This Festivus ugly sweater is not just another piece of clothing; it's a statement. Featuring playful designs that encapsulate the essence of the Festivus for the rest of us Christmas sweater, this sweater is perfect for those who love to blend humor with their holiday attire. Whether you're attending a holiday party or just lounging at home, this Festivus holiday apparel will keep you comfy and stylish.
Perfect for Everyone
Available in sizes for both men and women, the Festivus sweater for men and Festivus sweater for women ensures that everyone can join in on the fun. This funny Festivus sweater is designed to fit all body types, making it an ideal choice for family gatherings or friend meet-ups. It’s the perfect Festivus Christmas outfit that you can easily layer for those chilly winter nights.
Ideal for Festivus Celebrations
A Novelty Christmas Sweater
The Festivus celebration sweater is more than just a novelty item; it's a tradition! This Seinfeld Festivus sweater pays homage to the beloved show while providing a comfy and warm fit. It’s an excellent choice for anyone looking to add a quirky twist to their holiday Festivus attire.
Express Your Grievances
What better way to air your grievances than in a Festivus grievance sweater? This unique Festivus themed ugly sweater not only adds humor to your holiday wardrobe but also sparks conversations and laughter wherever you go. It's a must-have for anyone who enjoys a good laugh and a nod to pop culture.
Gift the Joy of Festivus
Looking for a Festivus Christmas gift that stands out? This Festivus Christmas jumper makes for a fantastic present for friends, family, or even yourself! Its quirky Christmas sweater design is sure to bring a smile and create memorable moments during the holiday season.
Shop Now!
Don’t miss out on the opportunity to own this one-of-a-kind Festivus holiday wear. Whether you're looking to add a festive touch to your wardrobe or want to impress friends with your humor, the Festivus funny sweater is the perfect choice. Get your festive ugly sweater today and celebrate Festivus for the rest of us in style!
View Product: https://dinounicorn.com/product/festivus-for-the-rest-of-us-ugly-christmas-sweater/
Home Page: https://dinounicorn.com
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justanoasisimagines · 3 months ago
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Christmas Alphabet!
A = Advent Calendar - Do they have an advent calendar? What is their advent calendar like? Chocolate or something else? For example, a candle or a novelty one etc.
B = Baking - Would they do any baking with you? Are they good at baking? Do they have any special recipes? What's their favorite baked good? Are they good at decorating?
C = Cooking - Who does the cooking? Are they good in the kitchen? Any special dishes? Are they experienced in cooking Christmas dinner?
D = Decorations - What are they like with decorations? Are they minimalistic? Do they go full out? How early would they put up their decorations? E = Events - What events if any do they attend during the festive season? Do they plan any events? F = Family and Friends - Do they spend a lot of time with their family and friends during the festive season? Do they spend Christmas with their family? Any family traditions?
G = Gifts - Are they good at buying gifts? Do they like to get their Christmas shopping early or do they leave it to the last minute? Do they like receiving gifts? H = Hallmark - If they were in a Hallmark movie, what would their trope be? I = Ice skating - Would they go ice skating with you? Are they good at it? Do they enjoy it? J = Jingle Bells - Do they enjoy Christmas music? Would they go Christmas Caroling? How do they react to Christmas Carollers?
K = Kids - How special do they make Christmas for the children? Do they spoil their children? Have any unique Christmas traditions for the children? Are they more relaxed or do they always go over the top?
L = Lights - Would they put up lights outside? Are they subtle or extravagant? Would they take their children to a lighting ceremony? Would they drive around the neighborhood to see the lights?
M = Mistletoe - You're both caught under the mistletoe. How did you get there? What happens?
N = Naughty or Nice - Would they be on the naughty or nice list?
O= Orgainised - How organized are they? Do they get everything done promptly or do they leave everything until the last minute? P = Pjamas - Would they wear matching Christmas pajamas with you? With your children? What would they look like? Q = Questions - Would they ask you any romantic questions during the holiday season? For example; to marry them? To be their significant other? Etc R = Romance - If they were to fall in love at Christmas, how would it happen? How would you meet? Etc S = Santa - Do they take their kids to see Santa? What would they do if their child saw you kissing Santa? etc T = Tinsel - Do they like tinsel? Have they ever found themselves tangled in tinsel? U = Ugly Christmas Jumpers - Would they wear one? What would these look like? Would they be willing to wear a matching one with you? V = Vacation - If they would take a vacation during the festive season, where would they go? What would they do? etc. W = Wrapping - Do they enjoy wrapping Christmas presents? Are they good at it? Do they add additional elements such as bows, ribbons or tags? X = Xtra - An Extra Christmas headcanon Y = You - What do they love about you during the festive season? Would you have any Christmas traditions as a couple? Etc Z = Zzz - What are they like on Christmas Eve? Do they struggle to sleep or do they treat it like any other night?
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frimleyblogger · 11 months ago
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Topical Cracker Jokes (2023) (2)
More topical #Christmas #cracker #jokes
What happened to Mark Zuckerberg’s novelty jumper when he had a cage fight with Elon Musk? He was left with nothing but Threads. What’s the difference between The Polar Express and HS2? One’s a fantasy about a train and the other’s a film with Tom Hanks. What did Robert Oppenheimer get Barbie for Christmas? Atomic Kenergy. Why are the train drivers on the naughty list this year? Because���
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dlabken · 1 month ago
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Transform Your Holidays with Our Transformers Ugly Christmas Sweater
Are you ready to make a bold statement this holiday season? Look no further than our Transformers Ugly Christmas Sweater! This festive piece combines nostalgia and humor, making it a must-have for fans of all ages. Whether you're attending a holiday party, family gathering, or just lounging at home, this sweater will keep you cozy and stylish.
A Unique Addition to Your Holiday Wardrobe
The Transformers holiday sweater is not just any ordinary sweater; it’s a piece of Transformers winter apparel that brings joy and laughter to your festivities. With its vibrant colors and fun designs featuring your favorite Autobots and Decepticons, this sweater ensures you'll stand out in any crowd.
Features of Our Transformers Christmas Attire
Material: Made from high-quality, soft fabric, our Transformers Xmas jumper is designed for maximum comfort and warmth. You'll love the cozy feel as you celebrate the holiday season.
Design: Featuring iconic characters and festive motifs, this Transformers themed ugly sweater captures the spirit of Christmas while showcasing your love for the franchise.
Fit: Available in various sizes, our Transformers holiday pullover offers a relaxed fit, making it easy to layer over other clothing.
Why Choose Our Transformers Holiday Fashion?
Choosing the right holiday apparel is essential for setting the mood during the festive season. Here’s why our Transformers Christmas sweater is the perfect choice:
Nostalgia: With its retro designs, this nostalgic Transformers sweater evokes fond memories of childhood, making it a hit among longtime fans.
Humor: The funny Transformers Christmas sweater design adds a lighthearted touch to your holiday celebrations, ensuring you’re the life of the party.
Limited Edition: This limited edition Transformers sweater is perfect for collectors and fans alike. Don't miss your chance to own a unique piece of Transformers holiday fashion.
Perfect for Gifting
Looking for the ideal Transformers Christmas gift? This novelty holiday sweater with Transformers is a fantastic choice for friends and family who love the franchise. It's a thoughtful present that combines practicality with fun, making it a memorable addition to anyone's Transformers winter wardrobe.
How to Style Your Transformers Ugly Christmas Sweater
Wearing your Transformers festive outfit can be easy and fun. Here are a few styling tips:
Layer it Up: Pair your sweater with a simple turtleneck underneath for extra warmth.
Accessorize: Add festive accessories like holiday-themed scarves or hats to enhance your look.
Casual Bottoms: Combine your sweater with jeans or joggers for a relaxed yet stylish vibe.
Conclusion
This holiday season, embrace your inner child and show off your love for the Transformers with our cozy Transformers Christmas sweater. Whether you’re attending a party, staying in, or gifting to a fellow fan, our Transformers holiday sweater is the perfect choice.
Celebrate in style and comfort while spreading the joy of the holidays! Don't miss out on this Transformers festive clothing item that brings together fun, nostalgia, and holiday spirit. Order your Transformers ugly Christmas sweater today and make this season unforgettable!
View Product: https://dinounicorn.com/product/transformers-ugly-christmas-sweater/
Home Page: https://dinounicorn.com
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mysticalnightenthusiast · 2 years ago
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S.N.A.F.U- CH75“Tis the Season”
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After helping Niamh pack up all her tattooing supplies the final touches for the Christmas party swung into action.  Roisin and Grace headed straight to the kitchen and were holding court and shooing away anyone that dared attempt to “help” Joe and Donnacha went out into the backyard lit up the fairy lights Eadaoin and Daniel put up earlier in the day and started a bonfire in the fire pit.  Niamh had assumed the role of bartender and was bustling around the bar in the games room and earlier Daniel had set a Christmas playlist going and had disappeared upstairs to ‘change’.
“What the hell are you wearing?” Eadaoin asked with a snort of laughter as the curly haired Australian skipped down the stairs clad in an’ ugly jumper’ with ‘Jingle My Bells’ embroidered across the chest “jingle my bells?  Where did you get that monstrosity?”
“The ‘internet’” Daniel replied with a grin “it had matching elf tights and shoes but not in my size.”
“Oh my god you would have worn an elf costume?” Eadaoin asked with a giggle “babe everyone from the track is coming over...”
“And if you remember we said on the invitation to wear an ugly sweater or novelty piece of clothing” Daniel said with a grin “what sort of host would I be if I didn’t abide by my own rules?
“What the hell are you wearing?” Niamh asked with a snort as she entered the kitchen “jingle my bells?”
“Just getting into the spirit of the season!” Daniel exclaimed as the doorbell rang “the party begins!”
Eadaoin and Daniel made their way down the front of the house to the elegant carved wooden doors that marked the entrance to the house.  Daniel unlocked the deadbolt and pulled the door open to reveal Lando who was standing on the stoop wearing a red sequined Santa hat and a knitted jumper with ‘Stop Staring at my package’ It’ written across the front. 
“Hey man welcome, Merry Christmas!” Daniel said greeting his friend with a fist bump.
“Hey Merry Christmas,” the young Englishman said brightly stepping into the house “Merry Christmas Eadie.”
“Hey Lando thanks for coming,” Eadaoin said embracing the younger man “you took Danny’s invitation instructions literally then.”
“Yeah why not, tis the season after all,” Lando said brightly “I nicked a bottle of bourbon from Dad’s cellar to contribute to the bar tonight if you’d like it.”
“Thanks, come through.” Daniel said “you’re the first here.”
Daniel and Eadaoin led Lando through the house down to the kitchen/dining area where the center of activity was.  Eadaoin sought out Niamh and introduced her to Lando.
“Lando this is my cousin Niamh,” she said “she’s just moved back from The Netherlands.  Nevie this is Lando Danny’s team mate.”
To say Lando was floored was an understatement his jaw fell open as soon as Eadaoin introduced her cousin.
“Hi nice to meet ya,” Niamh said brightly “like a drink?  I’m the mixologist for the night.”
“S-sure,” Lando stammered.
“We’ll leave you in Nevie’s company, sounds like more people are here,” Eadaoin said cheerfully as the doorbell rang “don’t get him too drunk Nevie.”
“I won’t,” Niamh promised.
“Bet you fifty quid those two will be snogging before the end of the night,” Eadaoin said to Daniel as they made their way back to the front of the house “Lando is smitten isn’t he?”
Daniel grinned.
“He is,” he said “but I don’t blame him, all the women in your family are good sorts.”
“Oh brother.”
The next people to arrive were Max and Kelly.  The Dutchman was wearing a jumper with ‘Gangsta Wrapper’ on the front and Kelly had dressed up in a Santa themed pantsuit.
“Super Max!” Daniel exclaimed briefly embracing his friend “good to see you man. 
“Hey, these are your new digs huh?” Max asked stepping into the house.
“Well mine and Eadie’s,” Daniel replied as Kelly and Eadaoin greeting each other enthusiastically “she’s gone to town decorating it.  My credit card is going to be maxed out by Christmas Day”
“Oh you’re full of shit,” Eadaoin said dryly as she shut the door.
“So who’s coming tonight?” Max asked shivering slightly as they made their way into the warmth.
Daniel lit up.
“Just about everyone invited,” he said “everyone except Nikita, Lance, Fernando and Yuki.  Checo, and Tonio went straight home after testing, Kimi headed straight to the Maldives and Lance and Sara are going to be in Mykanos til tomorrow before heading to Canada for Christmas.  I got a text from Kimi this morning saying “thanks for the invite but fuck getting on another flight, I’m going to go home, get drunk and get fat.  Might see you in the new year.”
“Has anyone else heard from him since Abu Dhabi?” Max asked.
“Not that I know of but you know Kimi as soon as testing finished he would have well and truly retired from the game.  I don’t think anyone will hear from him any time soon.” Daniel told his friend “I know when my time comes to hang up the helmet I’m going to spend the first month of retirement not going to the gym and sitting on my arse doing nothing.”
“That describes you in the holidays!” Eadaoin exclaimed with a snort of laughter as the doorbell rang again “I’ll get that, head into the games room that’s where the drinks are happening.”
Daniel led Max and Kelly off into the center of the house and Eadaoin answered the door. This time it was Esteban and his girlfriend Elena both wearing matching ugly Christmas themed onesies.  Eadaoin lit up and immediately hugged the perky Frenchman.
“Esteban you came!” she exclaimed happily “come in come in it’s freezing; oh it’s so good to see you both!”
“I hope we’re not too late?” Esteban inquired.
“No you’re both on time; Max, Kelly and Lando are already here,” Eadaoin replied.
“We brought some wine and some chocolate as a housewarming gift,” Elena told Eadaoin giving the redhead a gift bag with Christmas motifs plastered all over it.
“Thank you so much, come through and warm up, the party’s just getting started,” Eadaoin said urging the couple further into the house “Danny Esteban and Elena are here!”
Daniel emerged from the games room and greeted the new arrivals enthusiastically.
“Jingle My Bells?” Esteban said greeting his friend with a friendly fist bump after reading the message on his jumper “Really?”
“That’s what I said,” Eadaoin said dryly “Lando’s wearing one that says ‘Stop Staring at my Package’”
“Are we matching the theme?” Elena asked with a grin as she twirled in a circle.
“Absolutely,” Daniel replied with a grin “you followed instructions to the letter.”
“Who’s here so far?” Esteban asked.
“Max and Kelly and Lando, my parents, Eadie’s parents, brother and cousin,” Daniel replied cheerfully “George, Carmen and Charles and Charlotte are on their way together they’re Ubering it from the same hotel, come in come in!”
From then on the rest of the guests arrived in a rush, Daniel and Eadaoin had barely welcomed George, Carmen, Charles and Charlotte before the doorbell rang again and Pierre arrived in a very elaborate Santa costume and red velvet sack.
“Zis ‘as to be ze best Christmas costume!” the Frenchman greeted then as soon as Daniel opened the front door “I put so much effort into zis!”
“Pierre Gaslyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!” Daniel cheered greeting his friend with a slap on the back “hey man welcome, Merry Christmas.”
“Joyeux Noel,” Pierre replied brightly fist bumping Daniel and kissing Eadaoin on each cheek.
“Katerina didn’t come with you?” Daniel asked.
“Yeah....no she didn’t uhm....we broke up.” Pierre admitted.
“How come?” Eadaoin asked in concern at the same time Daniel said “You don’t look too unhappy about that.”
“I’m not,” Pierre admitted answering Daniel’s question first.
“Was it sudden or had things been brewing for a while?” Eadaoin asked “you don’t have to answer that if  you’re not comfortable.”
“I don’t mind answering,” Pierre replied “you see Katerina and....erm....”
“Jem.” Daniel volunteered.
“Were really good friends.” Pierre continued “and she believes all that shit Jem told Deux Moix and didn’t want to be around someone she thinks bashes women and by extension their new girlfriend.”
“So she thinks I’m a slut and Danny’s a woman basher?”
“Yeah,” Pierre admitted “she refused to believe that Jem was lying and when she found out I wrote a written character reference to the court in favour of Daniel we had a huge screaming argument and I said I can’t be around anyone who believes that shit and dumped her.  I don’t need that crap in my life.  Daniel was fucked over so badly and so publicly and didn’t and doesn’t deserve to be around anyone that refuses to see the truth.  I think things had been brewing for a while when I think about it.”
“And you’re not unhappy about ending it all?” Eadaoin asked.
“No, as I said I think things had been getting difficult for a while,” Pierre replied “the distance between me living in Milan and her living in Paris probably didn’t help.”
“That’s not even a ninety minute flight!” Daniel pointed out.
“Yeah I know but I’m not unhappy with the situation, time to move on, get drunk and bust your ass in a game of poker.”
“Oh pfft in your dreams Gasly you’ve got no hope, Valtteri’s coming tonight and if you beat him I’ll kiss your ass.” Daniel scoffed.
“Really?” Eadaoin said with a raised eyebrow.
“Maybe with enough Vodka under my skin,” Daniel said with a grin.
Ten minutes later Tiffany and Valtteri arrived then shortly after them Lewis, Angela and Lewis’ P.A Sarah arrived each wearing some type of Christmas themed clothing.
“Angela pangela good to see you bro!” Daniel exclaimed laying on a thick Kiwi accent.
The Kiwi trainer rolled her eyes.
“Your Kiwi accent sucks,” she said in amusement, returning his hug “literally no New Zealander sounds like that.”
“I know, just hanging shit on ya,” Daniel said with a grin “hey Lewis good to see ya man Merry Christmas.”
“Yeah to you too,” the champion driver replied bumping fists with him “how was L.A? Thought I’d run into you while I was there.”
“We didn’t venture out much to be honest.” Daniel said as Eadaoin greeted Sarah cheerfully “nothing apart from a drive up to Big Sur to stay in my manager’s cabin for a couple of days.  Its good to stay in once in a while y’know?”
“Believe me I know.” Lewis replied dryly “you heading back there before the end of break?”
“Maybe though we are considering the Maldives for a bit, somewhere sunny.  Kimi is spending the entire Christmas and New Year break there.”
“So I hear, we if you fancy heading to Hawaii for a bit you’re welcome at my place, I’m heading there in the New Year with some of the family,”
“Thanks for the invite; come through come through there’s already a pool game in progress.”
Nicky and Sandra were the last guests to arrive twenty minutes later then the part got underway in earnest.  A spirited game of eight ball was underway between Lando, Max, George and Pierre on one team and Lewis, Valtteri, Pierre and Charles on the other.  In the corner a spirited game of poker was underway with Roisin, Charlotte, Kelly and Sandra with Cahir dealing.  Niamh was keeping everyone supplied with a full glass of alcohol and Joe, Donnacha, Carlos, Daniel, Grace and Nicky had split into pairs and were playing a loud game of darts.
“Wanna give me a hand taking these to the kitchen?” Niamh asked Eadaoin as she stacked a tray full of dirty drinking glasses on a tray “we’re running out of glasses.”
“Sure.”
Eadaoin drained the last of her vodka soda and put her glass on the tray before picking it up and followed her cousin down to the back of the kitchen.
“Can I ask you something?” Niamh asked once they were away from the hubbub and noise of the party.
“Yeah sure, shoot,” Eadaoin replied as she began loading the dirty glassware into the dishwasher.
“Is Lando single?”
Eadaoin immediately burst into a fit of giggles.
“I knew it!” she exclaimed in amusement “I told Danny there was a thing between you two you’ve been flirty as fuck all night haha!”
Niamh immediately turned a violent shade of scarlet.
“Oh go fuck yourself,” she muttered “well is he?”
Eadaoin took several deep fortifying breaths to calm herself.
“Yeah he is,” she said “why?  Fancy asking him out?”
“Yeah I might do,” Niamh replied her face a definite shade of pink “hey he’s a bit cute.”
“Mmm I suppose he is,” Eadaoin replied with a huge grin “haha!”
“Oh shut up ya bitch,” Niamh huffed a small grin playing upon her lips “stop making fun of me.”
“I can’t help it,” Eadaoin replied with a shrill giggle “you and Lando would make a cute couple.”
“Would you mind if I invited him to the show at Whelan’s tomorrow night?” Niamh asked.
“Of course not!  You can invite whomever you like but don’t expect Danny not to hang a bit on shit on you, he’s worse at it than I am.”
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It was another two hours later when the glass supply was low that Daniel volunteered to clean the dirty ones.  Joe helped and the two mean carried the dirty glassware back to the kitchen on two separate trays.
“You’re happy,” the elder Ricciardo observed as he helped his son load the dishwasher.
Daniel grinned.
“I am,” he admitted with a happy sigh “there was a time twelve months ago I never thought I ever would be again.”
“Remember what I said back then?” Joe asked.
“Which thing in particular?”
“The day you arrived on the farm,” Joe replied “I said give it time and let your heart heal, concentrate on who you are as a person as a single man, then if it’s meant to be put yourself onto the market again and the right person will come along for you, and it has all worked out like that hasn’t it?”
“Well I didn’t exactly put myself on the market Dad,” Daniel said in amusement “that day I went running I didn’t exactly leave the house looking to pick up.”
“Well I know that but didn’t I tell you that when the time was right the right person for you would come along?” Joe said dryly “it was and it did, I know you splitting your head open and Eadaoin breaking her ankle isn’t the most romantic way to embark on a relationship but its your and Eadaoin’s story, something you can tell your kids and grandkids one day.”
Daniel rolled his eyes.
“Kids-grandkids?” he said “Jesus Dad all of those are way off. I’m only just settling into being in a proper relationship.  I think both of those are years away yet, even getting married is way way off.”
“Your mother doesn’t think so.” Joe said leaning against the kitchen bench as Daniel dropped a tablet into the dishwasher.
Daniel almost slammed his fingers in the door of the dishwasher in surprise.
“What the fuck?” he exclaimed “Mum doesn’t think what?”
“That you and Eadaoin getting married is far off,” Joe repeated “she figures one of you will propose to the other in the next few months.”
Daniel rolled his eyes again.
“Now that’s Mum saying that!” he said in amused exasperation “in Abu Dhabi Michael said to me he was going to start a book at the track betting on who would pop the question first, me or Eadaoin.”
Joe couldn’t help it and bust into amused laughter.
“He did?” he said with a hearty snigger “what time is it back home?  I ought to tell your Mum that and get her to ring Michael to put a few bucks on.”
“Oh don’t be ridiculous Dad,” Daniel groused watching his father chuckle to himself.
“Only joking kiddo, look I don’t know if you and Eadie will ever get married, you have to be absolutely sure that’s the road you want to go down.  And to be honest your Mum and I aren’t looking that far ahead for you two either we just want you to be happy and it appears you are.”
“I am,” Daniel confessed “the happiest I’ve been in ages.  Look I don’t know if Eadie and I will ever get married but I do know she is my one and done, whether we get married or not I know she’s the last woman I’ll ever be with.”
Joe grinned and slapped his son on the shoulder.
“That’s good to hear son,” he said “now come on let’s go join a game of darts.  I fancy my chances of a win.”
“Against who?” Daniel joked “not me old man.”
“Old? You can kiss my arse m’boy!”
*******************************************************************************************
A couple of hours later just after midnight when everyone was well and truly drunk Daniel briefly paused the Christmas playlist that was blasting through the sound system in the games room which immediately drew everyone’s attention, even Lando who was the drunkest out of all the guests sitting rather close to Niamh on one of the sofa’s in the corner whilst unsuccessfully trying to built a house of cards from a pack of cards from the poker set.  As soon as the music ceased the card house collapsed and he swore loudly.
“Every time I get this fucking thing going it falls down!” he complained “fuck you Dan!”
“Oh shut up,” Daniel told his colleague chuckling as the younger driver slumped on Niamh with a happy drunk grin upon his face “alright everyone I won’t keep you long, I know we all want to get back to seeing how many more cowboy shots Lando can stomach before he passes out on the pool table....”
“He couldn’t even walk to the pool table,” Nicky pointed out with a snort of laughter.
“We could pick him up and put him on there....” Max said with a drunken titter.
“Fuck you Max!”
“No thanks I don’t want spew on my brand new pool table,” Daniel said with a grin “anyway while you’re all here I just wanted to say huge thanks for all the support you gave me and by extension Eadie when I was going through all that shit with the ex.  I read each one of those character witness letters you wrote and I had no idea that’s how you all saw me....”
“Hey that’s what friends do,” Nicky pointed out “you went through a really shitty time and any decent person would have stuck up for you.  We’re all sure you’d do the same if any of us were in the same situation.”
There was a murmur of agreement amongst those gathered.
“Yeah I would,” Daniel replied “in a heartbeat, anyway I just wanted to say thanks for that and thanks for coming tonight, I’ve been having a really good time.”
“We’ve ‘ad a really good time,” Pierre said matter of factly “can you do zis again next year?”
“Nah mate it’s your turn to host a Christmas do,” Daniel said with a grin.
“Jesus Christ mate my place in Milan wouldn’t fit half the people that are here now, Lando would have to pass out in my bathtub.” Pierre replied with a grin.
“Shut up Pierre!”
“We’ll figure out something anyway mate.” Daniel said with a smile as he turned the volume of the music back up “who fancies a game of darts?”
*******************************************************************************************
After teaming up with Grace and Niamh against Joe, Daniel and Cahir in a game of best of three darts Eadaoin excused herself and made her way back down to the back of the house where the downstairs toilet was to relive herself. The loud beat of the music obscured any other noise in the house and it was some surprise when she opened the door she walked in on Carmen on her knees giving George an enthusiastic blow job.
“Oh fuck!  I’m so sorry!” she exclaimed as George hurriedly tried to cover himself up and Carmen wiped her mouth “I didn’t think anyone else was in here!”
The couple before her couldn’t do anything but swear and look away in embarrassment.
“I better leave you to finish,” Eadaoin told the mortified couple “you might want to try running your tongue along his taint and up his balls and dick then pull on his sack as he cums,” she added to Carmen “have fun!”
And with that Eadaoin shut the door and turned on her heel to leave. She went upstairs and relieved herself in the ensuite bathroom then made her way back downstairs a few minutes later by which time George and Carmen had returned.  The younger woman went bright red and avoided Eadaoin’s gaze, turning to talk to Tiffany and Charlotte but George strode over to Eadaoin and engulfed her in a crushing hug.
“You’re awesome!” he declared drunkenly before turning on a dime and striding over to Carmen who still steadfastly avoided Eadaoin’s gaze.
“What the hell was that all about?” Daniel asked in confusion as Eadaoin burst into a fit of giggles.
“D'you really wnt to know?”  she asked in amusement.
“Of course.”
“You know fifteen minutes ago when I went down to the back of the house to go to the loo?”
“Yeah.”
“I walked in on Carmen giving George a sloppy toppy,” Eadaoin replied with a grin “I told her about the trick I use on you sometimes and suggested she try it on George and he obviously blew like a volcano.  Isn’t that the grin of a man who just had the best orgasm of his life?”
Daniel couldn’t help it and roared with laughter.  Eadaoin hurriedly hushed him by pressing her lips to his.
“Shut up!” she hissed “don’t embarrass them; Carmen already can’t look at me.”
Daniel sniggered heartily.
“That’s hilarious!” he sniggered as Niamh and Lando got up from their place on the couch and headed down to the back of the house hand in hand “reckon those two are heading back there to do the same?”
 “Who knows but leave them be!”
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roughandtough1 · 2 years ago
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yesterdayiwrote · 2 years ago
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I love that George had to gift something fashionable to a fashion guy when he's errr... let's say classical in his own dressing ways (I prefer him in sweats and puma cargos though, so I'm not a great judge myself I guess lol) and he clearly went for something safe and useful to not shit the bed hahaha (I'm sure Lewis pranked him like his usual when he asked for help, and you can bet he did)
Look, I like that boy a lot but he is annually DIRE at gift giving in Secret Santa and this year he did not break that streak 😭😂
He has gifted, in order, an extra wide wing mirror (as a gag gift to Alex), a mug heater with a UK plug (for Valtteri, which I can see the logic cos he likes coffee, but dude COME ON 🫣) and novelty Christmas socks (and a Christmas dinosaur decoration) to Guanyu who, let’s be honest, is never putting his feet near them 😂
That being said, he’s had pretty dire gifts in return (a novelty Xmas golf jumper, a t shirt of his own chest and a Brazil drum that I can only assume Esteban got at the airport as he was leaving São Paulo because he’d forgotten 😂)
Absolute chaos tbh and I hope he continues doing it because honestly, it’s actually fucking hilarious
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sketchypenface · 4 years ago
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My first ‘knitted’ Christmas jumper design!
Available on my Redbubble Store
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fazcinatingblog · 4 years ago
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oh my god
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