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19thcenturyedgelord · 4 years ago

Text

TW: Transphobia, Homophobia, abuse, neglect, p3dophilia, s3xual assault, su!cide, alcohol

~Vent~

My mother is constantly saying that they is only two gender and is always dead naming me, the one time I get her to say my preferred name she rolls her eyes and scoffs as she says it.

My mother has told me my whole life that she owns me and that I don't get to make any decisions for myself, she was dressing me until I was disowned at 14.

My mother would threaten to k!ll herself is I ever did something she didn't like, this includes: having a panic attack, dealing with over stimulation, trying to dress myself, telling her to stop walking in on me while I was showering/changing, going to bed early, going to bed late, saying I was hungry, asking to be allowed to go outside, wearing my headphones, not being strictly christian/not eating kosher, ect.

My mother got rid of my pet hermit crabs without telling me and was constantly trying to release my turtles even though they would die in the wild and they were being taken care of very well with a large, clean tank and plenty of food and hiding places, a special light that was good for their shell, and a great water to land ratio.

My mother slut shamed me because I was wearing shorts that went above my knees (they were perfectly appropriate btw).

My mother would scream at me for hours if I got anything less than a 100% on a test and even if I did get a 100% she would ask me why I didn't get any extra credit even if there was none available and even if I'd did get extra credit she would ask why I didn't get MORE extra credit.

While I lived with my mother I had a diet of nothing but microwave meals and chips and chips because she spent all of her money on vape, cigarettes, and alcohol. I would constantly be near unconsciousness due to my low blood sugar because I had nothing to eat.

She has slapped me across the face multiple times, one time with sharp plastic that cut my chin, she did this as a punishment. One time she slapped me because my blood sugar was low and I was grumpy, this is how it went down:

Me: Hey I know you wanna talk right now but can I make some food first my blood sugar is low this should take me 20 minutes max"

Her: No, I'm you mother and your going to talk to me right now

Me: Can I please just get something to eat

Her: *yells at me wich causes me to get distracted*

Me: *spills uncooked mac&cheese because distracted*

Her: *yells at me then slaps me across the face*

My mother nearly beat me to unconsciousness because she was very drunk, I had bruises all over me the next morning but I was to afraid to say anything because I new she would scream at me and hurt me more.

She molested me daily, forced me to change in front of her, forcefully spooned me in bed for hours even after I said no, and would "playfully" spank me.

She was constantly talking about how sexy a 17 year old at her work was and even bought him vape. She would also talk about some of my friends like that and even tried to internet stalk two of them, we are all minors.

She would lock the door to the apartment and wouldn't give me a key and would force me to wait outside in knee deep snow for hours without any warm clothing because she stole it all. She also refused to drive me to school in -8 degree (f) weather because she didn't want to loose her parking spot. I was also forced to bike to and from band practice (with she forced me to to do because she wanted to live through me) in 30 degree (f) with heavy rain because she didn't want to loose her parking spot.

She would consistently make fun of me for reading or doing anything that I enjoyed because I was a "nerd" and a "looser"

She disowned me after she stole my phone, went through it and found out I was a lesbian.

I couldn't even go into my yard without telling her where I was going, if I didn't tell her I would be screamed at and not allowed out my room, for a day and then not allowed out of the house for two more weeks.

She routinely went through my phone and my belongings without my permission, knowledge, or consent, in case I had anything "suspicious".

I tried moving in with my dad and she sued him.

She stole my most prized pokemon cards, a bag, most of my clothes, all of my old toys, and over $200 from my in the span of two weeks.

My room didn't have a door and she positioned herself so that she had to go through my room to get anywhere else in the house.

She would frequently lock the bathroom door so that it was only accessable from her room.

I told her I like pop music and she called me a failure then continued to play her extremely s3xual, vulgar, music about dr*gs, alcohol, and r@pe.

From the time I was 8 she tried to force me to drink alcohol because its "cool"

She forcefully pushed me against a wall because I refused to give her a hug after she made an offensive joke and I called her out for it.

She screamed at me because I corrected her after she misgendered me.

I had to learn morse code just so I could speak to my friends without her knowing what I was saying.

When I started counseling because I wanted to k!ll myself and because I was having upwards and 15-25 panic attacks per day, she forced me to tell her everything that happened in counseling even if I didn't want to.

She always gangs up on me in fights but if I try to get back up she just yells at me more.

She refused to take me to the hospital when I had a concussion and forced me to go to school all week even though I could barely stand or speak and now I have verbal and motor tics which she makes fun of.

She would scream at me because I sit down in the shower even though I have arthritis. (Yes I have arthritis at 15, it runs in the family and before to long I might develop psoriasis, I have shitty genes)

I wasn't allowed to wear anything that revealed my shoulders, that was low cut, shower any part of my stomach or back, short that went above my knees, ect.

I wasn't allowed to get my hair cut below my chin because it " wasn't feminine enough"

I wasn't allowed to have anything that was "for boys" this included clothes, toys, books, stickers, blankets, posters, movies, ect.

She forced me to watch R rated movies with her even if I didn't feel comfortable watching them.

I wasn't allowed to have any friends over and I wasn't allowed to go to any friends house, the one time I did have friends over she judged all of them and tried me to stop hanging out with them after they left. My friends are all very good people and are the only reason I'm still alive rn, she was just mad that I was talking to people who weren't her.

She screamed at she because I got one (1) drop of dark green ink on her black coffee table that she got for free.

I wasn't allowed to draw any male characters because she was afraid I would get off to them or something idk (this was before I was forcefully outed)

She bought me a triple chocolate cake for my birthday once. I'm allergic to chocolate. She forgot my birthday the next year.

Anytime I would tell her about the terrible bullying that was going on she would tell me to get over it, even after I had been thrown to the ground and strangled by one of my classmates.

If I got into a new game or hobby she would either take it away or shame me for playing it.

She spent all day on the computer playing Sims 3 to the point where I had to feed myself, take care of myself, and play by myself as young as 5.

She screamed at me because while talking about Pokemon lore I mentioned how Arceus is the god of the Pokemon world and she said I shouldn't say that because it would "make god mad" ( I have nothing against christians or christianity btw, just the people who shove it down your throat like she does)

I wasn't allowed to eat or drink the last of anything (finishing a bag of chips, taking the last soda, ect.) If I did she would scream at me and slap me as punishment.

She threatened to forbid me form seeing my cousin (who for the first 11 years of my life was my only friend) if I ever "talked back" to her.

She wod frequently strangle me as a form of "tough love".

When I was 2 she tried to teach me how to swim by holding me under water over and over again, drowning is now one of my greatest fears. Luckily I did learn to swim with the help of cousin and granny and even enjoy swimming but it is hard for me to do things like wash my face in the shower or stay under water for more than a few seconds without panicking.

She never taught me how to cook but then would scream at me because I didn't know how to cook.

Her smoking inside and while driving has caused me to have some lung issues, she denies that she ever smoked near me.

She tried to take me away frome everyone in my life including my family and friends so that I could only spend time with her.

When I was in fifth grade she homeschooled me and forced me to do college lever reading, learn how to code, learn at least two other languages that weren't english, learn how to play guitar, do gymnastics, do jujitsu (japanese), do soccer, learn to sing (keep I mind I had no interest in music, but she did), do a digital homeschooling program set at a highschool level, and learn a bunch of useless skills like knot tying and making friendship bracelets because it was "feminine". This was in FIFTH FUCKING GRADE.

We didn't have a washer or dryer and she would never go to to town to get laundry done so I never had clean clothes.

If I had more that $10 I had to give the rest to her.

She tried to kidnap me once.

One time on accident I stood in a bull ant hill and got stung all over (if you don't know ants all sting at once), I was swollen all over and screaming in pain and she did nothing, not even give me ice or ointment, she just told me to be more careful.

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diagnosedblog · 7 years ago

Note

Pretty much anything Mileven (calling El, El not Jane) with fluff or angst or anything really but preferably while there still young (shortly post season two)

Word Count: 3k

Rating T: Occasional language

Pairing(s): Mike/Eleven

Content:

Chill!Mike - not as nervous or fidgety

Growing!El - has grown on her knowledge but still struggles with things

Limited telekinesis - she doesn’t want to accidentally hurt Mike so she keeps them to a minimum.

Enough fluff but probably not enough bc this is horrible and it’s my first request please spare ily anon

okay let’s DO THIS

(please enjoy it and thank you for the prompt) - Diagnosedblog

January 11th, 1985

7:40 PM

Jim & Jane Hopper Residence

“7-4-0.”

She read this and sighed. Hopper was nowhere to be found, and El was becoming very bored.

After what happened with the gate closing and the previous events, El had decided to simply relax and enjoy being able to sit down and breathe. She still had to hide for the remainder of the year so everyone made sure to keep her under wraps. However, things were no longer as hectic as they used to be and she could finally be with her family and friends. She had more time to be with Mike now and that was the cherry on top; spending time with him. Even a day without him seemed to be a struggle now that they were able to see each other. She had grown used to their separation, and she was glad it was over.

Hopper was out because apparently someone had taken a lawn mower from farmer Merrill’s shed and used it to mow obscene images into the free grass outside of his field. Merrill was absolutely furious and insisted that it was one of Eugene’s ‘hooligan friends’, and he refused to lay it to rest. Hopper went to go question Eugene, only to find out the same thing happened to him. Both men went to the station and were going off completely on one another, and Hopper had to stay to help calm them down and gather more details. He would be home at around 8:40 or 9, beeping “HOME BY NINE” in Morse code.

This left El free to do as she pleased and she didn’t mind, to begin with. She had eaten 7 Eggos, watched 10 soap operas, took 2 naps, read 4 magazines, and attempted to fix the broken radio (which proceeded to explode).

She lay there, dazed and still extremely bored. She no longer wanted the house to herself as she had nothing to do; she had no work to do because she was not yet enrolled in school, and she had already finished her daily practices (she was home-schooled at the moment). There was nothing interesting for her to (try) to read, and she had watched a majority of the soap operas on the television. Everything else was trash on a screen. El wanted Hopper to come home so he could teach her how to play board games tonight, but since he was out she had no guide. She didn’t understand the directions and playing without them was pointless, so she gave up. Board games aside, El really just wanted to call Mike and maybe talk to the Party (except Max - there was still bad blood there). She had trouble working the phone and also didn’t know the Wheeler’s number though, so there was no hope. She laid there, contemplating life.

Suddenly, there was an unfamiliar knock at the door. It wasn’t the secret knock, but it wasn’t alarming either. It was quiet yet simple. Almost as if this person was being cautious or trying to hide. El had been taught by Hopper to never open this door for anyone else under any circumstances and these rules still applied to her even after she no longer had to hide but this person didn’t seem threatening. She pondered on whether to hide and let the mysterious person leave, or just to crack the door open a bit.

She decided to do neither and simply turned the porch light on, looking out of the window onto the porch. When she saw them her eyes grew wide and she quickly scurried to the door and opened it.

The mysterious person had been Mike. Having been grounded, he snuck out of his basement and took his bike up the trail to the woods, as he hadn’t seen El since Christmas Day in late December. They greeted each other with a hug.

“Hey, El.”

“Hey, Mike.”

Having Mike here really brightened up her mood. The boredom was starting to consume her, and she had been wanting to see him for a while, but now that he was here things were looking up; this night wouldn’t so boring after all.

“I brought you some chocolate candies since I know you like them. Maybe you can put them on your waffles.”

“Thanks, I will put them in the fridge. I’m too full to eat anything else.”

She smiled as she took them from his hand and headed to the kitchen. As she went to go put the chocolates away, she noticed Mike was still standing awkwardly at the door.

He noticed her puzzled face and grew flustered. “What’s wrong?”

“Why are you still standing? You may sit after all.”

“Oh. Right.”

She stifled a giggle. Even after knowing for 2 years he was still a nervous wreck, and she thought it sweet.

He quickly took a seat and casually watched the television. “I got the candy from Dustin - he had a bunch of chocolate left over from our last campaign.”

Dustin and leftover food was a suspicious combo. “Is it safe to eat?”

Mike laughed. “Yes, it is, this time at least. He had a bunch of other weird candy that no one wanted and tried to shove it at me, but I just threw it back at him because of no one like honeysuckers.”

This made her grin cheekily as she came up with an idea. As Mike stayed on the couch, she quietly went through the kitchen drawers until she found a pack of uneaten jelly beans. She turned back to him from behind and began to aim. A lift of her hand and a swift wave-

FLICK.

Mike felt the back of his head in confusion. It was something had been thrown at him, like a little piece of paper. He looked around and saw El in the kitchen, who had sneakily pretended to look for something in the pantry. He didn’t find any answers and decided to just ignore it. He impatiently waited for El on the couch. “Whatcha lookin’ for?”

“Oh, just potato crunches.” While she actually picked out 3 more jelly beans.

“Oh okay. I’ll just be here. On the couch still.”

“I’ll be in there just a second.”

THUMP.

Okay, now he knew he wasn’t imagining things. Three tiny objects had basically been launched at his head and he knew who was responsible.

“Hey!”

He turned to find her giggling like a giddy little girl while holding a whole jar of beans.

“Stop throwing candy at me!”

“No. It’s fun.”

She proceeded to launch 5 more beans, but Mike ducked quickly.

“Stop it!”

El just laughed. She was clearly enjoying this.

Seeing her laugh really lightened the mood for Mike. She had never laughed so fluidly before and he loved how happy she sounded. Wait, no. No candy fights - they would make a huge mess and El might break something.

Mike huffed. “Give me the bowl.”

“Nope.”

“Fine, I’ll just take it.”

He got up and walked towards, reaching for it when-

WOOSH.

The bowl was 7 feet in the air.

“El, give me the bowl.”

“No.”

Mike tried to jump for it, but she only lifted it higher.

“Please?”

Mike pleaded with his eyes, which she found charming but ineffective.

“Okay.”

He went for it as it was lowered and-

WOOSH - thump thump thump.

She had levitated it again, but tilted it, so that about 7 pieces fell on Mike’s head.

He looked at the pieces on the floor but kept his head down. He decided it was better to play along. If she wants to play dirty, we’ll play dirty, he thought, smiling to himself.

“Okay..since we’re doing this..” he said, still facing the floor.

He jolted to the kitchen, catching El off guard and thundered through the cabinet doors to find more candies. El grabbed more beans and began to hurl them at Mike but her attempts to slow him weren’t successful, as he found a whole bowl of candy.

“GAME ON!” he screamed as he threw the candy.

El shrieked as about 10 things of candy were hurled at her. At first, she was frightened because she didn’t want Mike to throw them too hard, but the fear subsided when he literally completely missed her and basically threw candy at the fridge.

She bee-lined out of the kitchen as Mike threw multiple piles of jelly beans, laughing maniacally. El suddenly remembered the whipped cream in the top drawer to the right, and she snatched it out when she got back to the kitchen. Mike’s face dropped at the speed of light, as the can was levitated and suddenly sprayed everywhere. The whole living room was soaked - it was snowing whip cream. Mike covered himself and bolted into her bedroom, slamming the door where he could shelter himself.

“Try and get me now!”

“Damn you, Michael!” She learned that one from Miss Wheeler.

She chuckled as she set the can down and sat at the door. Part of her was exhausted, but the other part of her could have done this forever.

Mike was sitting on the other side. “El?”

“Yes, Mike?”

“I just wanna say..” Suddenly the door opened and El flew to the ground.

“Hey!”

“I found the spare can!” He snickered as held it directly in front of her face. “You better run!” She quickly got off her feet and ran out of the room. That’s what she gets for sneaking the second can into her room.

They did these things all night, and Eleven was truly having a good time. Though she did love his calm and kind demeanor, she loved Mike like this too - fun-loving and wild.

They threw and used every piece of candy and junk they could get their hands on - Skittles (“Taste the rainbow sucker!”), chips, whipped cream, waffles, even a piece of cake. The floor was basically destroyed with cream and crushed candy and snacks. You would’ve thought someone sprayed the place with a fire hydrant, as the walls were splattered with everything from syrup to flour. The kids looked even worse - El was covered in everything from Eggo crumbs to cinnamon, and Mike looked even worse with sugar in his hair and a powder covered face, with whip cream up his nose. Eleven found this especially hilarious, especially when it came out whenever he sneezed. He looked so adorable when he wrinkled his nose.

“I don’t find anything funny about this.” He pouted.

“I do.”

He looked at her as she laughed and giggled. This time he was able to truly look at her. She looked so pretty even covered in sugar and messy smashed chocolate. Her smile was still infectious as hell, and Mike couldn’t help but stare. It made him happy to see her so happy and to have so much fun with her doing something so ridiculous. It amazed him that this was the girl he loved, but he didn’t regret it in the least.

El loved that Mike had gone from being the party pooper to being the life of the party in just a matter of jelly beans. She hadn’t expected him to get into so quickly, or to have so much fun. It was so adventurous; throwing Skittles and Hershey’s and expired candy that elderly people gave you and pouring flour all over the place. The whipped cream was the best part - Mike has sprayed directly at her and running all the place had been a pure blast. She was basically in confectionery bliss; the boy of her dreams was acting crazy with her and enjoying every second of it.

She happily munched on a skittle she found in her pocket while continuing to think about it.

“I thought you were full.”

“Well, I’m not anymore, so haha.”

Mike let out a weird giggle that caused her to laugh quietly. Another great thing about him - his weird giggle. It sounded very odd, but it was still contagious. It was beautiful in its own way.

“El?”

“Yes?”

“I had a really great time with you. I thought we were just gonna watch TV, but this is way better.” He pointed to the ceiling, which was dripped with fresh cake dough. They had basically used everything in the kitchen.

“It would be funny if that fell on you.”

Mike raised an eyebrow. “I don’t think it would.”

“I think it will.”

“I bet you 10 bucks it won’t.”

“I don’t have 10 bucks.”

“Better find some.”

“Hmph.”

They quietly laid there, eyeing the fan to see if the cake stuff would actually fall. It did.

Eleven was in pure giggle fits as Mike wiped soggy cake mix off his face.

“You get some too!” He laughed as he slathered some on her.

“Gross!” She exclaimed

Mike cackled. “I’ll get it off just wait.”

“No, let me get it.” She said as he attempted to get up and wipe it off.“No, I got it just let me-”

He stopped as their faces got closer together, blushing very hard. Mike hadn’t realized he was that close to her when he went to focus on the cake mix and he had crawled in between her legs. He thought of getting out of her personal space so not to seem rude, but he didn’t do this. Instead, he leaned in, slowly but surely, and placed a small peck on her lips. They were soft even while dirty, and very comforting. It tasted like sugar and passion. It sounded corny, but it was the most honest he could’ve been. He almost kissed her again and then he realized what he was doing.

“I-I’m sorry. I should’ve given you a heads up, that was rude-”

Mike was interrupted by the crashing of lips onto his. El smiled as she held him in a smooth, but short little kiss, full of affection and silliness. She’d never kissed him like this before; the kiss was either really emotional or just rushed, but this was different. It was more joyful, more giddy and playful. Mike enjoyed it.

She pulled back and saw that Mike’s eyes were closed. He must’ve really liked it because he didn’t open them until she snapped her fingers.

“Mike?”

“Huh? Oh. I’m okay.” He chuckled nervously. El frowned; she didn’t mean to make him uncomfortable.

“I apologize.”

“What? No! It was amazing. I mean.. Really good. Cool. Yeah.”

She grinned at the nervous goof in front of her. “I love you, Mike. I really do.”

Mike smiled, face as red as a tomato. “I really do, too. Love you, that is.”

El laid back down, resting herself as Mike regained his composure. All the excitement had tired her out.

She felt Mike’s fingers intertwine with her, and instantly felt at ease. His soft, warm hands served as a forgiveness for the mess they had made, and both children blissfully fell asleep.

Eleven woke up first. She had had a very good nap, albeit on the floor, and she turned to see Mike still knocked out. He was cute while he slept; the silent breathing and the way he would slightly twitch here and there. She decided to get and check the time to see if Hopper was close. She immediately panicked.

“8-3-0! No! Dad is going to be furious!”

Mike groggily awoke. “What time is it?” Then he saw the clock.

“Shit! We only have 30 minutes to clean this whole house!’

Fear started to set in as the two realized the severity of their mess. Everything was basically vandalized with dry and sticky food as well as littered with candy.

“What am I going to do?” El mumbled to herself sadly.

“I’ll help you clean up. We have to hurry though.”

She perked up. “Of course. I will get the broom.”

“I’ll get the mop. Then we’ll do what else is necessary. Let’s go!”

They spent the next 25 minutes cleaning up what they could. It was definitely grueling; you would’ve thought there was a supernatural war going on, as paper towels and brooms and cleaning supplies flew back and forth along the house. It gave Mike a lot to keep up with and Eleven several nosebleeds and a big headache, but it had to be done.

At about 8:55 PM, the work was finally finished. Mike had just vacuumed the last of the candy, and after putting back in the closet, collapsed on the now clean couch as El sat there in her blankie, popcorn in hand (the only thing not used in the food battle). He looked at her with tired eyes and scoffed. “You get to sit there and eat while I clean. I’m underappreciated.” El playfully rolled her eyes at her silly boy. He smiled at her, all teeth, as they held hands until Mike decided it was time to leave. “I love you,” he said as he enclosed her in a tight hug. “I love you too, Mike.” She returned the hug warmly, and then he quickly got on his bike and peddled home.

Hopper came home shortly after Mike had biked home so he didn’t know the boy had been there. He didn’t notice anything at first, though he did note the house seemed cleaner than usual. “Hey, kid. I trust you been good.” He ruffled his daughter’s hair and let out a sigh of relief at finally getting home. “You been anywhere today?” “No.” “Good. Don’t want you to be in any danger out there.” He said gruffly as he rummaged through the fridge. Then he noticed it - the Eggos was completely gone. He turned back to Eleven who was completely lost in the television, holding the empty box. “Did you eat this whole thing?” She turned to face him and for a brief second Hopper saw worry in her eyes. “Umm…yes.”

He grew suspicious quickly. “Why?”

“…I was hungry.”

“There was plenty of leftover food.”

“It looked gross.” A blatant lie. The food actually was delicious, but she had eaten the waffles first and was too full to get to it.

Hopper grew irritated. “C’mon kid we talked about this. You can’t not eat just because it doesn’t look good. It’s still good for you, you can’t live off of waffles, alright?”

She nodded understandingly. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright. Just eat real food next time.” He started to walk towards his room when he noticed the fan was on but was going really slowly. He flicked it off, and El heard a strange gooey noise. Then she remembered: she’d forgotten to get the fan!

Hopper took note of the house again and walked back towards her, perplexed. “Hey, kid did you clean the house-”

SCHLOOP.

Sticky, soggy cake dough. All over him. Hopper stood there for a moment, pondering whatever it was that hit him when he realized it. “My cake mix?” She stayed awkwardly silent.

“Why in the hell was this on the ceiling?” He growled, turning to his daughter accusingly.

El didn’t know whether to feel bad for him or laugh at how he looked covered in dough.

“I can explain.”

Hopper slowly wiped it from his face. “Oh trust me. You will.”

As he went to go clean himself off, El recapped the evening’s events. She knew she would be in deep trouble. She didn’t care much though.

She remembered the fun she had and how much she had loved being with Mike that whole time. Throwing food, running around, sleeping on the floor, cake dough on Mike’s face; it was all brilliant.

A word she’d learned from Flo at the station. Perfect to describe the night.

Wait.

Mike owed her ten dollars.

Fun fact: Potato crunches are her weird names for potato chips. Just so you know lmao.

#stranger things #stranger things 2 #st #st 2 #mileven #mike x eleven #prompt #request

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