#not too happy with this set but I've just spent like one and a half hours of my morning on this so. I need to shower lmao
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disenchanteds · 1 year ago
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This is a collection of music written in the middle of the night, a journey through terrors and sweet dreams. The floors we pace and the demons we face. For all of us who have tossed and turned and decided to keep the lanterns lit and go searching—hoping that just maybe, when the clock strikes twelve...we'll meet ourselves.
Happy birthday, Midnights! (October 21, 2022)
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woncon · 3 months ago
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➳ sick duty.
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➶ poly!ateez x gn!reader (yungisang focus) 。˚ °
-ˏ` ✎﹏ Yunho is sick, and you and Yeosang are on sick duty. When the others still haven't arrived with jelly, you decide to go to the nearest shop in the raging storm and buy some, because Yunho really wants them.
➴ genre: slice of life, sickfic, estabilished relationship, polyamory, non-idol!au
: ̗̀➛ warnings: yungisang focus, but everyone gets screen time, poor yunho has a fever, one sexually suggestive offer, petnames, nudity
⌨ :: 3.5K words ♡ ︵ . .
⁀➷ This idea came to me when I saw a double rainbow in early June while listening to Golden Hour Pt1. It was supposed to play in the summer, but I never got to the end. Now autumn came and I decided to write it. But in this rainy, gloomy weather it seemed better to set it in a more autumnal setting. That changed my basic idea a lot, but I'm happy with it as it is.
⁀➷ My lovely @wonsheep, I'm still sorry the rain poured on you so heavily on Wednesday. :( But it was very motivating, as you can see. Many thanks for reading through the story and founding my silly mistakes!
➳ mlist
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I'm hot.
I want tea.
I'm cold.
The sickly season of the autumn-winter months spares no one. Yunho, who is hard to dislodge from whatever well-endowed giraffe's legs he has, is now curled up in the middle of the bed, disconsolate because he didn't pull on a thick enough scarf, or was carelessly underdressed in the living room, or simply spent too much time around a co-worker who has been lurking with some virus. Whichever the case, the poor guy is in a terrible mood.
"I want medicine," he whispers his next wish.
You look at your watch.
“One more hour before you can take the next one,” you say, brushing his hair away to touch his sweat beaded forehead. It's still as warm as underfloor heating.
Frustrated, he rolls to the side and buries his head fully into the pillow. You drop your hands back into your lap, helpless. It's simply exasperating to watch him suffer, to listen to his snotty, ragged breathing mix with the rain beating against the window.
“Do you want something to help?” you ask, when he turns to you again and raises his feverish eyes to you. The skin around his nose is flushed from all the blowing.
“Jelly.”
Yunho is convinced that jelly sweets can help him. Or at least when he's sick, he likes to eat sweets. Other times, not so much. Unfortunately, you guys weren't prepared for Yunho being sick in the near future. Plus, there's a storm brewing, the kind you haven't seen in a long time. It's been raining steadily for a week now, sometimes more, sometimes less. The others went to do the shopping with the car, leaving Yunho behind with the promise to bring him some jelly. He responded with a small, grateful smile.
Now, looking at his tortured expression, you would give a lot to see that smile again, the hope in his eyes. You reach out and take his hand. You sigh. Gently, slowly, you caress the back of his hand, knowing how sensitive he is to touch when he has a fever. You don't want to overdo it and hurt him, but at the same time you want to let him know physically that you're there for him.
"It's on the way." You really hope it is. The last time Jongho called, they were already at the checkout. Your youngest friend boasted that they were bringing five full bags of jelly beans. That was about twenty minutes ago. No news since then. It bothers you that you can't offer an immediate solution to Yunho's every wish.
Before Yunho can ask any more questions, the door opens. Yeosang arrives with a tray holding a steaming mug and something wrapped in napkins that you can't identify yet. With cautious steps, he moves to the other side of the bed among some discarded clothes - because Yunho didn't want to shower this morning, just threw everything off the bed he'd chosen as his regular place - and then takes a seat, placing the tray safely on the bedside table, gently moving Seonghwa's half-finished book.
“I've brought the tea," he says to Yunho. "And I found some biscuits to go with it."
Interested, the patient moves up on the pillow, but still looks vulnerable. Yeosang holds the cup in his hand and gives the man small sips. Meanwhile, you get up and gather up the laundry strewn around the bed and take it to the bathroom. On the way, you hear a conversation emanating from the kitchen, from which you hear the word 'jelly bean' clearly spoken at one point. So after throwing the laundry in the hamper, you go to the kitchen instead of the bedroom. The room is filled with the smell of hot water and tea leaves. Mingi is putting away the tea ingredients. The call is already finished, his phone is on the counter.
Originally, Mingi wouldn’t be on sick duty today. Today's subordinates are you and Yeosang, Mingi just didn't want to leave the apartment in this crazy weather and he’s helping you instead. It's not like this sick duty thing is strict in your relationship, and it's set in stone that Mingi can only nurse Yunho on Mondays and Fridays and holidays or anything. That said, there are rules. For example, Mingi usually only needs one nurse when he gets a cold or something more serious, but at such times it is Yunho for most of the time. Then there's Jongho, who, if he falls ill, no matter what the schedule, has all eight of you at his disposal twenty-four hours a day. Or, again, there's Seonghwa, who hides the fact that he's sick until it's too obvious, and you're all freaking out as to why he won't let you take care of him.
Yunho usually hardly gets sick. When he does, even a mild cold will get him down. And when he is ill, he's even fussier than the sick Wooyoung, and only one lover has a hard time coping with his demands. Usually two people are enough to care for him if there are jelly beans nearby. Which, for now, there aren’t.
“Are they on their way home?” you ask Mingi, who's packing honey. 
"It's worse downtown than here," he says. "The traffic's bad. They're just moving towards home inch by inch."
You both look out of the window, and the tapping of the rain remains as unrelenting as the fever that plagues Yunho.
“Is the tea to his liking?”
“I'm sure of it,” you smile at him. Mingi is usually insecure when it comes to Yunho's well-being. You suspect that the boy's illness was a more significant reason for Mingi to stay home than his desire not to get wet. “But you can ask him.”
You return to the bedroom with Mingi at your side. You remind yourself that this room now functions as a ward. The patient is huddled near the edge of the bed, munching on biscuits soaked in tea, so that they don't scratch his throat.
“It's not jelly,” he mutters, then pulls away from Yeosang and lies back on the upholstered cushions.
You look at Yeosang. Your theory is that you're thinking the exact same thing. If jelly beans are the only thing that helps your boyfriend, you'll do anything to get them. You're even willing to go to the convenience store in the pouring rain, because when you are on sick duty, Yunho mustn't lack anything.
"We'll go and get jelly beans," you say. Yeosang nods his head in commitment.
“We'll go?” Mingi looks terrified. “All of us?”
You can't leave Yunho alone in this state. It's a good thing that Mingi is here, in addition to Yeosang and you, ready for action, and not stuck in traffic with the others downtown. 
“No. You stay here with Yunho and look after him.”
Mingi continues to blink. 
“We'll be quick, don't worry, you don't have to multitask. Yuyu will probably fall asleep soon.”
"It's not me I'm worried about," he protests, "You'll get wet and cold."
"The store is not far away. We won't have enough time in the rain to freeze to death."
Yeosang wraps Yunho in a blanket and kisses him on the head.
"Mingi?" The man folded in a burrito addresses the worried individual.
“Yes?”
“Gimme a hug.”
Mingi doesn't resist, but climbs onto the bed, swapping places with Yeosang, who pats his shoulder as he passes. Before you even leave the room, you hear Mingi apologize and ask for Yunho's forgiveness.
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Yeosang sticks the umbrella out the door. Just a little to test how much it rains. There's really barely any surface out, but the wind immediately grabs it and tugs it further. He pulls it back in time before the umbrella swings out or the wind wins, and you close the door with a great struggle, which also wants to jump off its hinges from the violent gusts of wind.
“I think this will stay here,” Yeosang says, and then drops the solid black umbrella behind you.
You zip up your raincoat. It occurs to you that maybe Mingi is right, and you'll be so wet you'll get stuck in a puddle of icy water. Yet the idea doesn't discourage you, doesn't make you stay, because Yunho needs the jellies.
Yeosang adjusts his hood, then holds out his hand. You embrace him tightly. You check your wallet stashed in the waterproof pocket one last time and place your hand on the doorknob. Then you push it down. The door swings open, and you let it drag you along with it. The back of your coat gets soaked immediately. The rain doesn't fall, it instead pours down from behind in a wave with the wind. Clinging on to Yeosang in vain, it's hard to keep up your own pace and not lurch forward like a rag doll. It's a wonder your boyfriend can close the door.
Although the shop is indeed a block away, at this time it feels like you're wandering for eternity. For one thing, the scenery is completely different in the rain, it's harder to navigate, especially in the raging, commanding wind. Around one corner, Yeosang has to pull you in, because out of nowhere a car appears, its wheels gallantly splashing a full puddle onto the pavement.
Somehow, you do reach the store. As soon as the automatic door closes behind you, the storm is out of the way. Inside, the weather is pleasant. Only the clothes clinging to your skin and the small puddles and mud stains on the floor left by other shoppers are reminders of what a doomsday is happening outside.
“Huh,” you sigh in relief. The first game of the war against weather is over. You only have one more to go to succeed in the jelly bean mission.
“We're crazy," Yeosang shakes his head in disbelief. Then he smiles up at you, sweetly and lovingly, because he's proud you're crazy. You return it.
Insanity is part of sick duty to some extent. Last time San must have used up thirty tissues a day, and ran out in the middle of the week. Hongjoong ran so fast to replace the used-up packets that he was almost hit by a truck. And when you were sick and craving nothing but a mug of hot tomato soup when all the shops were closed and there were no tomatoes at home, only ketchup... Well, Jongho tried.
You purposefully seek out sweets. Luckily, you don't have to wander around and scout the place, you'll often find yourself here. You take off two bags of Yunho's favourite flavour, sour apple. You remember again how pitiful your otherwise healthy and cheerful boyfriend looks.
“This will help him,” Yeosang says encouragingly, as if he's reading your mind.
You nod, then head for the cashier. You get in line. From here, you can see the window and the rain pouring down.
For the first time since the jelly bean plan was born, you have time to think about Mingi's excuse when he cuddled up to Yunho. It's my fault. I'm sorry. But how could it be his fault that Yunho caught a cold?
You're rewinding the previous two weeks. Yunho was in home office the whole time. He really enjoyed it, and when he wasn't working, he was playing video games. He didn't put his foot out until one time when he had to pop down to the shop for something. It didn't rain so heavily that day, just a gentle drizzle. Maybe Mingi had taken off Yunho's blanket one night? It couldn't be, either, because they'd been sleeping far apart lately.
It's your turn, so you suspend your musings. When you get back, you'll ask Mingi and hope it's not too embarrassing for him not to tell you. If he feels guilty, you could help him and reassure him that it's not his fault.
You and Yeosang pay. You put the bags in your coat pockets. You pull the hood up, not that it matters. You cling together again, then step out onto the soggy pavement. 
The way back is harder. This time the wind brings the rain from the front. Each blast smacks you in the face. Neither of your hoods can stay up. Your hair gets wet, the rain drips under your coat. You successfully step into a puddle, literally splashing in the muddy water, and the inside of your boots get soaked. You're wet everywhere, from your elbows to your toes. It's really annoying, but you don't falter, clutching Yeosang's arm until you reach the sheltering door of your home to drop in like two wet rags on the threshold and with a combined effort you shut out the cold, ominous wind. Yeosang slides along the door, his hair leaving a wet streak on the wooden panel.
“We did it,” he sighs, and proudly rattles one of the jelly beans he pulls out of his pocket. The bag is intact, of course.
“We did,” you agree, and pull him up off the ground.
Suddenly you're faced with the problem of not knowing what to take off first because everything is equally soaked. It's almost as if your clothes are the cool part of your skin, plus outer layers. Finally, following your boyfriend's example, you throw your coat on the floor first, then your shoes on the doormat, and socks after.
Before you reach for the next layer of clothing, there is the sound of footsteps. You think Mingi is coming, but when he sighs, you realize it's not your tall lover.
“You guys are adorable and dedicated, but silly at the same time," says Hongjoong with crossed arms.
“But at least Yunho’s jellies will hold out until he heals,” answers Yeosang, taking off his shirt.
“When did you arrive?” you ask.
“About a minute ago. But we'll talk later. Now go take a shower before you too end up feverishly next to Yunho,” Hongjoong advises, then retreats and San steps forward. He unconcealedly runs his eyes over Yeosang's naked torso, and yours, which still has your shirt stuck to it, rather tightly, so it might even be useless.
“If you get sick, I'll be on sick duty every day. The thing is, the adorable, dedicated, silly people are just my type” he winks.
“Move over, Sanie," Wooyoung appears and nudges the other one in the side, "You promised to help hyung pack up.”
San hums and walks away, but still smiles in your direction. You all love to oblige Hongjoong and Seonghwa, and that goes for when there's an opportunity to flirt as well.
“You two are sexy, all wet,” Wooyoung admits. “If you need help with the shower, let me know. I'll be within earshot.”
“We'll consider it,” you promise. Wooyoung nods with a grin, and he also retreats to the kitchen.
You pass through the hallway, but before you can go to the bathroom, Jongho stands in front of you with a plate of jelly beans. “Here. I thought you should be the ones to give it to him. You made a greater sacrifice, and most of us stayed dry. Except for Hwa hyung, who opened the door and held the umbrella.”
“Thank you,” you say at the same time. While Yeosang takes the bowl, you press a kiss on Jongho's cheek.
When you retire to the bedroom, the scene is quite cozy. Yunho is in bed, hugging Mingi, craving jelly beans, and you offer him what he craves most, and what you fought Mother Nature for.
“We got it,” you report.
Yunho snaps his head up. The mere hope brings life to his sick features. You stand by the bed, careful not to get rainwater on it.
“Here, hyung," Yeosang hands the bowl to him in a soft whisper.
“I hope you weren’t too desperate, baby. We hurried as much as we could.”
“You're the best," says Yunho, touched, between bites. “I love you.”
“We love you too, giant baby. Very much,” you assure him.
And he smiles up at you. The mission is a complete success. Whether all that time and getting soaked was enough to put you to bed remains to be seen. In the meantime, you bask in success.
Mingi sneezes. Then he reaches under the pillow and takes out a handkerchief. “My throat may be a tiny bit scratchy.”
“Should we set up someone on sick duty for you too?” Yeosang offers readily.
“Our poor boyfriends,” you sigh, watching them. Yunho in the midst of illness, Mingi as he probably slips into a state of flux.
“I deserve it,” murmurs Mingi, looking ruefully at Yunho.
“Why do you think so?” you ask the question that has been nagging at you for a good twenty minutes.
“When we ran out of milk last week, Yunho and I went to the grocery store... I offered to make out with him in the rain. It didn't rain much, and there was no wind. Still, that's how Yunho got cold.”
"Come on," the other protests hoarsely. He sucks on a jelly bean with great enthusiasm. You wouldn't believe he can taste it. “You offered, I agreed, I could have said no, but I didn't. All in all, it was worth it.”
“Worth it?” Yeosang raises his eyebrows. “You were dying before the jelly arrived.”
"If you haven't kissed Mingi in the rain, you won't understand," he declares, then turns to Mingi. “Want a jelly, princess?
Yeosang and you leave them alone, let them romance each other in the infirmary. Barefoot, you stomp off to the bathroom. You open the door, and a thick, fragrant steam rises from the room. A pleasant warm breeze reminds you how cold you are. You hurry inside. Yeosang closes the door to keep the comforting steam from escaping.
Seonghwa is already drying his hair and got dressed. You look at him expectantly, ready to be reprimanded. But he has no such plans. He takes your face with one hand and Yeosang's with the other. “I am proud of you. Take a bath, then we can watch a movie. We made a whole list while we were stuck in traffic.”
Yeosang hums, you nod in response. Good idea. At this time of year, there's no point in doing anything other than curling up on the sofa together.
You bask in Seonghwa's soft touch until the last moment, and the knowledge that he's proud of you. It's really enjoyable to play good cop, bad cop with Hongjoong, and they don’t scold you twice. Regardless, you need to figure out a way to cheer up that boyfriend of yours who called you adorable, dedicated, and silly all at the same time. 
“So he probably caught it while kissing,” you acknowledge what you've heard by tugging your trousers down after Seonghwa has left you alone.
“Interesting.”
“And understandable. Sounds romantic.”
“Do you want to go back?” Yeosang glances up at you as he pulls towels out of the closet. The look in his eyes is willing. It embarrasses you to know that he would take a single word from you and go back with you into the pouring rain to fulfill that desire.
“I wouldn’t do it in this weather. But, for example, standing in a cool summer drizzle, refreshing after the heat. When me and my partner won’t be so likely to have a fever for a week.”
“Last summer Woo did it with someone. I think it was with Sanie, but I'm not sure. Maybe he caught Hongjoong hyung in a moment of weakness.”
“Really? Is it fashionable to kiss in the rain in our relationship?”
“A bit.” Yeosang undresses completely. 
Your hand is over the laundry basket, you've dropped the last of your clothes in it, yet you don't move. You’re looking at Yeosang. At his naked back, how rainwater is dripping from his hair, onto his delicate muscles. The line of his shoulder blades as his back narrows, ending in the lovely hips you'd hold in your hands for days. And of course you can't neglect his ass or his thighs or his whole being, because once you start looking at him, one part of him is not enough, and the whole of him is overwhelmingly wonderful.
He turns back to you. “Are you coming?”
“Sure.” You follow him into the bath. You take his face in the palm of your hand and kiss him on the lips. “Wooyoung was right.” 
“About what?”
"You're sexy when you're wet," you explain, and at the same time you probably reveal that you were just staring at him.
"He didn't just say that to me, love," he replies, pulling you close. Then he opens the water. The warm, soothing drops fall on your head and drip down your chilled skin. Like rain.
“I have an idea. Let's kiss here like it's raining.”
“Oh,” Yeosang smiles sweetly. His thumb caresses your cheek. “Okay.”
And you shower until the hot water runs out.
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potatoplace · 2 months ago
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this is me trying
ACOTAR x Archeron!Reader
The Afterthought: Chapter 3 | series masterlist
part 2 | part 4 | ACOTAR x reader masterlist
Story Summary: The day after your birthday is spent shopping for Solstice presents and a surprisingly pleasant conversation with one of your sisters. Winter Solstice proves to be a pleasant affair for you this year.
Warnings: self worth issues, discovering bisexuality, honestly there's not much here, it's a fairly fluffy chapter, lemme know if I missed something
Words: ~8.2k
Author's Note: here it is! It's only like... half of what I wanted to cover in this chapter, but I'm happy with what I've written. I hope you all like it! It's a bit nicer of a chapter, mainly fluff-ish with very little angst imo. (It's a lot nicer than I'd planned to be... lol) enjoooyyyy 🫶
18+ only pls
🤍🤍💝🤍🤍
You woke when the sky was still dark, the house beneath you quiet. Your body was still aching, the sharp pains having woken you from your dream of the cabin and your father.
Forcing yourself from the tub, you pulled your bedding back to its rightful place and drew a bath. The steaming hot water was the perfect remedy along with your fingers rubbing gentle circles over your lower abdomen.
The sky was just beginning to lighten when you dragged yourself from the bath and dressed, resolving to do you skincare when you returned from your mission.
Shopping for Feyre's birthday and Solstice was your one true goal for the day, and then you could hibernate for the two days before Solstice.
Your eyes roved over the stack of presents on your desk, catching on something you hadn't expected.
A plate with a piece of white chocolate raspberrry cake, a single candle sticking out of the slice. Along with it was a matchbook and a note. You tried to read it, but only got as far as deciphering who it was from- Feyre, from the signature at the bottom. Most likely an apology of some sort, but you could wait to have someone read it for you.
You turned your eyes to the cookbooks your sisters had gifted you. A sigh escaped your lips, and you walked over to look at them once more. The dessert book Elain had gifted you would be helpful for your gifting ideas- you wanted to give each couple, Mor and Azriel a box full of their favorite cookies and sweets.
Personal gifts would only be for Feyre, Mor and Azriel, seeing as it was Feyre's birthday, and Mor and Azriel had picked out more personal gifts for your own birthday. And of course Nuala and Cerridwen, you had always appreciated their willingness to share some of the cooking duties with you.
Mind settling back on the cookbook that Elain had given you, you flipped through it, attempting to identify everyone's favorites by the drawings accompanying the recipes.
Your head was starting to hurt.
A shake of your head and you closed the book, opting instead to tug on your coat and a hat, grabbing the cookbook before leaving your room, shutting the door behind you quietly.
Before you set out into the wintery city, you stopped by Nuala and Cerridwen's room, a soft knock on their door enough to have Nuala opening it.
"Could I come in?" You asked softly, trying to avoid waking those sleeping down the hall.
"Of course, Y/N," Nuala said with a smile, opening the door wider to let you slip inside, eyes catching sight of the book in your hands. "Did you need help reading a recipe?"
"Not quite, well... Yes, but I would also really appreciate if the two of you could help me find the recipes I need for Solstice presents, if you wouldn't mind?"
"Oh, I'd love to!" Cerridwen said once she had emerged from the bathroom, a towel still wrapped in her hair to dry. "Oo, a book of Solar Court desserts! I haven't seen this one before," the wraith said excitedly once she looked over the cover of the book. "Did you have anything particular in mind?"
"I was hoping we could find recipes for everyone's favorites, I'd like for all of them to have something they like. And maybe sugar cookies too, that could be decorated for Solstice."
"Ah, a challenge," Nuala smirked, a glimmer in her eyes. "Did you happen to want a little *help* making all of this?" She asked hopefully.
"If the two of you wouldn't mind, that would be lovely. But don't feel like you have to, please."
"Anything to help you out and spend a bit more time with you Y/N, it's been lonely cooking without you recently," Cerridwen reassured you, a gentle hand on your shoulder. "Now, let's get to finding those recipes, and Nuala and I will go shopping for any ingredients we'll need tomorrow if that's okay with you?"
You beamed at the twins, happy that they weren't upset at you disappearing on them for three weeks. "I would be so grateful to the two of you if you could help out. Thank you so much!"
The three of you sat down on Nuala's bed, flicking through the cookbook and marking each page that had a recipe you would need.
For Nesta, you would make thumbprint cookies with a blackberry jam- a dessert she had enjoyed since childhood, one that she had stared at hungrily for so long while your family had been impoverished. And for her mate, Cassian, you would bake lemon bars. He had absolutely devoured some at the Summer Solstice celebration this year, only leaving a few for everyone else.
Elain you would give chocolate dipped lacy cookies, her favorite treat to have with tea. Lucien would be receiving snickerdoodles, his favorite cookie and the first thing that Elain had baked for him.
Feyre absolutely adored thin lemon-ginger cookies, and with any possible morning sickness or nausea they could be a simple enough treat for her to have. For Rhys you would be making chocolate chip oatmeal cookies, made from his mother's recipe which Cerridwen had carefully tucked a copy of into the back of the cookbook for you to hold on to.
Mor would be getting lavender and pistachio macarons, snickerdoodles, and peanut butter fudge- the last you recipe you had stumbled across in the back of the book, and you knew it would be perfect for Azriel as well. For him you would be making the peanut butter fudge as well as a mint chocolate fudge, lemon bars, and peanut butter cookies. You hadn't seen him eat many sweets, but when he did they seemed to be either peanut butter, lemon, or mint, and you wanted to cover your bases.
And for everyone, and to give the three of you something to decorate, you would be making sugar cookies, hopefully in shapes resembling trees, ornaments, snowmen- really anything that would scream winter.
With the recipes picked out, the book left in the their care, and the twins' promise to gather the supplies, you set out for the Rainbow, in search of a present for Feyre.
The streets were quiet as you walked past rows of houses and apartments, the snow on the ground muffling everything.
It was easy to find the store you needed for the present you had in mind, the wood and paint scented air greeting you when you stepped inside. You glanced around, trying to familiarize yourself with the shop.
On your left was a wall of easels and canvases, the right taken up by every color of paint imaginable. You went to the left first after picking up a basket, setting nine small, square canvases inside before turning your eyes to look for rope and fasteners to connect all of them together. Your idea was for her to be able to paint one square per month of pregnancy, something to remember how she felt carrying her child.
"Did you need help finding something, love?" A female voice asked from the back of the shop, startling you out of your thoughts. You whipped around, eyes met with the sight of a beautiful fae, her skin shimmering in the light, constantly changing between the colors of the rainbow as she moved beneath it.
You managed to catch yourself from staring at her, your manners kicking in as you met her eyes- bright orange now, but you had a feeling that they would also change hue in different settings, the color shifting from a light sunrise to a burnt orange already.
"I was hoping to find some kind of rope to connect all of these, and something to fasten them to the actual canvas, if you have them," you replied shyly, your heart rate picking up as she came closer to you.
She was so pretty. You felt like you had months ago, staring at Cassian. But that was-
"I certainly do, love! They're on the other end of the shop, come with me," the fae said, her cool hand grasping yours and gently tugging you along with her. "What pattern were you wanting to put them in?"
"Uhm..." You tried to restart you brain, repeating the question in your head until you found its answer. "A three by three grid, I think."
She picked out several pieces of rope, as well as a small bag filled with pronged pieces of metal. "This should be enough of both, but if you need more you know where to find them now!" You nodded and followed her as she made her way to the counter in the back. "My name is Irina, by the way," she said as she bagged your items and wrote out a receipt.
"I'm Y/N." Just introducing yourself made your face flush, your mind replaying her name as you watched her fingers write.
"Oh, Feyre's sister?" Irina asked you, her eyes flicking up to meet yours once again. You nodded in confirmation, and she smiled. "I was wondering when I might happen across the youngest, I've already met your other sisters as well. Feyre's studio is just a few buildings down, and she comes in quite often for supplies. How has Velaris treated you so far?"
"Oh, uhm... It's a lovely city, truly. How... How much do I owe you?" You asked, trying to steer the conversation to a more pleasant topic.
"Eight gold marks, but I've already charged the account on file for you, Y/N."
You gave her a grateful smile. "Thank you, Irina. You have a beautiful shop here, I can see why Feyre comes in."
"Why thank you, Y/N! I'm very proud of it, and even more proud that our High Lady chooses my paints to use for her masterpieces," Irina sighed happily. "I hope the rest of your shopping goes well, love."
"I'm sure it will, thank you," you said with a smile before turning and slowly exiting her shop, your heart still racing from her presence.
You walked lazily through the Rainbow, eyes glossing over beautiful paintings and woven tapestries. You had nearly reached the end of it, almost in the Palace of Hoof and Leaf when you saw a stall that truly caught you eye.
Hairpins.
As children, the one purely material thing that you and Feyre had yearned for were hairpins. A woman in the village had made them by hand, delicate sticks with delicately crafted flowers attached to one end, sometimes with small gems dangling on short chains. They were far out of your price range while destitute, and you had almost entirely forgotten about your desire for one after your family had regained their fortune.
The ones from the village paled in comparison to these absolute works of art, lifelike flowers made of gems with matching petals dripping from them, secured only by small metal chains. Some had strings of pearls falling from them, others with a chain of sparkling diamonds.
You approached the stall, fingers hovering over the beautiful hairpins, but you were too afraid to touch them.
"Hello," the female behind the stall said, her silver skin shining, even shaded from the winter sun that had started shining brightly while you had been in Irina's shop. "Were you looking to buy a hairpin today?"
You smiled bashfully at her. "I might be, I'm not sure yet. They are absolutely beautiful, though."
The female beamed at you. "Thank you very much. They also double as a dagger, if needed," she said, pulling a thin sheath off of one of the hairpins, revealing a thin, sharp piece of ash wood. "They only open for the person it belongs to, so long as you place a small dot of blood on the sheath, it will appear as a simple hairpin. They're rather handy, for us females to keep around..." she trailed off.
Having something... Something to protect you could be nice, even if it wouldn't be much help in the end. But for peace of mind... And it could be nice for Feyre to have one, in case her magic is drained from her somehow...
Your eyes trailed back down to the hairpin that had drawn you to the stall.
A silver sheath with pink hydrangeas on the end, tiny flowers dripping down a short chain, tinier diamonds filling in the spaces between them. It was absolute perfection.
Another silver hairpin drew your eyes, this one with crescent moon at the end, a large sapphire hanging between its edges. Dangling from its bottom edge were two chains that met an inch down to continue as one, covered in small sapphires and glittering diamonds. Very Feyre.
"I'll take the both of these, please," you said as you lightly tapped both of them, not quite trusting yourself to hold them and not drop them.
"Ah, those are two lovely picks. May I ask who they are for?"
"The flowers are for me, the moon for my sister," you answered, watching as she carefully placed each in a velvet bag.
"What account would you like to credit it to?" She asked once she had tied off the bags, opening up the thick ledger next to her.
"Uh... Y/N Archeron, I suppose?"
"Ahh, the High Lady's human sister! If the crescent pin is for her, you chose perfectly," she said with a wink as she handed the hairpins to you.
Your nose scrunched as you smiled, "It is, and I thought so as well. Thank you so much...?"
"Opal. I'm always happy to sell my work to appreciative eyes," she said with a sparkle in her eyes.
"I may be back for another, at some point. Have a happy Solstice," you said cheerily as you left her stall, walking carefully after you spotted a patch of gleaming ice.
"The same to you, Y/N!"
The Palace of Hoof and Leaf proved perfect for finding tins for the sweets you would be baking, with an entire store dedicated to gift boxes.
Nesta and Cassian would be receiving one with a scene of the Illyrian mountains, a blazing bonfire the centerpiece, flanked by said mountains in the distance. For Elain and Lucien you picked a scene reminiscent of spring, a pond surrounded by trees with a clearing in front of it. In the clearing is a small, brown bunny, watched from bushes by a red fox. Very fitting, considering how Feyre always called Lucien a fox.
Rhys and Feyre would be getting a box decorated with the three peaks of Ramiel in the dead of night, a bright silver moon and speckles of stars lighting the sky. Perfect for the High Lord and Lady of Night.
Mor is receiving a tin with the view of Velaris at night from the House of Wind, what she had told you was her favorite view of the city.
And for Azriel, you chose one covered by a view of the sea from the cliffs of Velaris, late into a sunset.
You were satisfied with your choices, and left the Palace to cross the river and enter the Palace of Thread and Jewels.
Here, you found most everything else that you needed.
For Nuala, you got a new set of embroidery hoops as you had noticed hers were a bit worn, and truly she could never have enough seeing how many projects she had going at all times. In the same shop you picked out a variety of threads, including a selection of metal threads as she had mentioned a month or two ago that she wanted to try using them.
Before you left, you picked up a few skeins of soft yarn in jewel shades for Cerridwen, as well as a pair of knitting needles that were charmed to not lose any stitches if you accidentally dropped them.
You wandered further into the Palace, eyes grazing over beautiful gowns and spools of fabrics before they caught on something.
Red leather thigh high boots, a pair of matching gloves displayed in the same window.
That was a perfect present for Mor. You had even seen her in a pair of similar boots in black, so you knew they were her style.
And red. Her absolute favorite.
The boots and gloves were purchased quickly, tucked into a bag that you slung over you arm with the other two. You continued your journey, looking now for something for Azriel.
Quickly though, you found another present for the twins. A nice apron for both of them, one in a pale golden color with a silver moon and stars embroidered along the chest for Nuala, and a midnight blue apron, with similar silver stitching for Cerridwen. A nice apron always made you happy, and these ones seemed cute enough and close enough to each twin's typical color palette that they might wear them.
You ended up finding a nicely bound pale blue diary, almost the exact shade of Feyre's eyes.
If she was going to document her pregnancy in paint, she may as well have the option to document it in writing.
You explored the last few buildings of the Palace before giving up on a gift for Azriel from the shops it contained. You'd rarely seen him in anything but his Illyrian leathers, so you couldn't pick out a piece of clothing that you knew he would like. And he seemed to have all the gloves he would need, nearly always having a pair on hand.
The only thing you could think of...
Perfect!
You made your way back across the Sidra, through the Palace of Hoof and Leaf, and passed through the Rainbow before landing in the Palace of Flame and Steel.
You were searching for a dagger.
The Shadowsinger always had a dagger on him, if not an entire belt of them. Surely he could always use one more?
Twenty minutes spent wandering through the Palace had you shivering and slightly frustrated. Nothing seemed right for him, the hilts either entirely plain or completely encrusted in jewels.
While you were sure the plain would be just fine, you wanted something that seemed like him.
Not that you knew him very well.
You frowned as you entered a shop, its display window filled with knives, swords, and axes. Warm air rushed over you, smoothing your smile into a neutral expression as you took in the overwhelming amount of weapons inside.
An entire side of the shop was dedicated to knives and short swords, which you immediately gravitated towards.
There was some of the same fare you had seen outside, yes, but most of the knives had subtly decorated hilts, a good middle ground in your opinion.
You picked over them carefully with your eyes, trying to find one that Azriel may actually like to have. It was difficult, but you finally found one that you thought he might like. Fairly simple, a five inch blade with a black leather hilt, a small sapphire crescent moon on both ends of it. The gems matched his many siphons, and the knife came with a plain black leather sheath, a metal clip on one end so he could attach it to a belt if he wanted.
Your final purchase completed, you trudged back to the River House, taking as long as you could. You knew at this point that people would be awake and buzzing about, and you hardly wanted to speak with any of them. All you wanted was to put your Solstice presents away, make some tea in the new pot Azriel had gifted you, and eat the slice of cake that had been brought to your room some time last night.
Still, you dragged yourself back inside, shaking the snow off of your boots before you shut the door behind you. Quiet chatter was coming from the living room, but you paid it no mind as you snuck upstairs, shutting the door behind you softly.
The bags of presents were slid underneath the bed for safekeeping and to be away from any prying eyes. The only thing you kept out was your hairpin, the velvet bag soft as sin beneath your fingertips.
Should you...? Yes.
You shrugged off your hat and put it back in its spot, then your coat and replaced it on its hanger, leaving you in your dark blue wool dress and winter boots. Those were next, changed instead to your warm and fuzzy pink slippers.
Gently, you used the inside of the hairpin to prick your finger, and after replacing the sheath placed a drop of blood onto the metal, which sunk into it a moment later.
You went into the bathroom, your brand new hairpin in hand, and brushed out your hair. It took a couple of tries, but soon enough you had your hair secured in a bun, hairpin stuck through the middle. The petal chain hung down, and the sight of it in your hair made you tear up a bit.
Leaving the bathroom and going to your desk, you picked out a tea from the sampler that Azriel had gifted you, this one a strawberry green tea. You then pulled your new teapot and cups out of their box and braved the walk downstairs to the kitchen with all the items you needed for your relaxing afternoon, hopefully followed by a restful sleep.
When you entered the kitchen, it was blissfully empty, the rest of your family seemingly chatting in the living room, the buzz of which you could just barely hear.
Water was set to boil and you quickly washed the teapot and cups, a dish towel drying them just before the water began to boil. Tea leaves were poured into the strainer, hot water poured slowly and evenly over them.
It could almost be an art, you think.
"Oh, Y/N," Feyre said from behind you, just as you set the kettle back on the stove. "Could we- could I join you for tea? In your room I would guess?"
Lip between your teeth, you thought on it. As far as you could tell, Feyre hadn't wanted your birthday to turn into her pregnancy celebration. She had noticed you hadn't had cake...
"I suppose. For a cup," you replied, attempting to set a boundary with her.
Feyre nodded her head in agreement, a soft smile on her face as she watched you place two cups on a tray, the other two finding a place together in a cupboard. You waited another minute before removing the leaves, emptying the strainer and washing it. Once the pot of tea was on the tray, the two of you went up the stairs and into your room.
The tray went on your dresser, and you gestured for Feyre to take the squishy armchair in the corner of the room as you poured tea for the both of you. You passed Feyre her cup before pulling the chair at your desk over to her and sitting, your own cup of tea in hand. A cramp rippled through you, but you forced down any discomfort so that you could get this conversation out of the way.
"How are you feeling? Any morning sickness at all?" You asked Feyre, blowing on your tea after.
"A bit, but I've been having some ginger tea as soon as I wake up, and that seems to have helped." Feyre paused, taking a sip of her tea. "Mm, I like this one. Is it one that Azriel got you?" You nodded, taking your own sip. It was good. "And the tea set he got you is really pretty. I... I really didn't want for your birthday to end that way, Y/N. We tried to hide my scent but I guess something went wrong or... I don't know, but I feel so bad that we ignored you again," Feyre said tearily. "I really didn't want that to happen, I swear."
You sighed as you looked at her. You had already suspected it, but it still hurts. "I know you didn't Feyre, but it's still... It wasn't fair to me."
"I know it wasn't. I'm so sorry, I don't... I don't know how to make it up to you," she said quietly. "I... We're all going up to the cabin the day before Solstice, and staying through the night of Solstice. Did you... Did you want to come? Or you could stay here, if you'd prefer. I know last year was... Well, Nesta..."
Your mouth fell into a straight line as you thought back on last Solstice.
An absolute nightmare.
Nesta had been overly aggressive to you, still fully controlled by her rage and new mating bond. And just, overall, you had felt so out of place and unwelcome in the otherwise cozy cabin.
And on your cycle? Contained to an even smaller area?
"I'd rather not, if that's... If it's alright with you, Feyre," you said hesitantly, taking a nervous sip of tea after you finished speaking.
Feyre nodded her head in understanding. "I thought you might not, so I have one small ask: Would you be willing to have lunch with me on Solstice? I still want to see you, and spend time with you, if you'd like?"
The request was something you hadn't expected from your sister. Lunch?
"I think... I think that would be nice, Feyre. I'd like that."
Feyre's expression lightened at your acceptance, though her eyes still held unshed tears. "Really? Oh, thank you Y/N, I'm so excited to spend some one on one time with you!" Feyre said, as close to a squeal as you thought she would ever get. "And I do have a Solstice present for you too, I wanted to make sure you were celebrated then too." Feyre finished off her cup of tea and stood, placing it on the tray before standing in front of you. "Could I... Have a hug?"
A small smile played on your lips from the hesitant way she asked. You simply stood from your chair and set down your teacup before pushing yourself into her arms, savoring the warmth of her as you held each other.
"I'm looking forward to it too, Feyre. And I have a few presents for you too, so we can do a little exchange," you said once you pulled away from her. You looked at her- really looked at her. Your smile grew. "You're pregnant!"
Feyre was grinning as the tears finally fell from her eyes. "I am! I never thought- I never thought I would find a man that I would actually like enough, Y/N," she confessed through her tears.
"I know you didn't, Fey. I'm so happy you found Rhys."
The two of you embraced again, this time in joy of her expected child.
"Well, I should get back to work, I think. I've been planning an after-Solstice revel for the Hewn City as a way of breaking some of the barriers between us, but dealing with Kier..." Feyre sighed. "He's such a pain, but I don't truly have anything against the other citizens, so I'm pushing through. You're welcome to come, if you'd like?"
You instantly shook your head. "No, the one time I went I was so uncomfortable, I think I'd rather hear about any drama after, please."
Feyre's head bobbed. "I thought that might be the case. No worries there, sissy, but... You will come to Starfall, yes?"
"I'll be at Starfall, Fey, don't worry," you reassured her as the two of you made your way to your bedroom door. "Good luck with the planning, from what Mor has said about Keir he's... kind of the worst, right?"
Feyre chuckled. "He definitely is, Y/N. I'll see you later."
"See you later, Fey," you said, watching as she walked down the hallway. Your door shut softly, and you returned to your tray of tea.
One more cup, and you would do your skincare. And a bit of cake, as well.
🤍🤍💝🤍🤍
Two days later and the Inner Circle was departing for the winter wonderland of a cabin Rhys had, and you were in the living room seeing them off with Nuala and Cerridwen.
"Have a good time!" You said cheerily, mainly to Feyre and Mor.
"Oh, I'm sure we will," Feyre laughed, sending a mischievous look to her mate before turning back to you. "I'll see you tomorrow at noon, right?"
You nodded in agreement. "Definitely, Fey."
"Good! Have a good day here, you two take care of her, alright?" Feyre asked the twins, who nodded enthusiastically. "I'll see you tomorrow!"
She and Rhys winnowed off, taking Cassian and Nesta with them, along with their bags.
"Y/N, I had an idea, if you're up for it?" Mor asked once they had left, taking Feyre's previous spot in front of you.
"Depends on what it is, Mor."
"Well, I thought that I could come back ahead of everyone else tomorrow night, and the two of us could have a cozy little sleepover! Lots of hot cocoa, chocolate, staying up all night talking. How does that sound?"
You grinned at her, so happy to have her as a friend. "I would love that Mor!"
"Perfect! I'll most likely be back before dinner, but I will send a note if I'm going to be late." Mor's expression matched your own as she turned to leave, taking Elain, Lucien, and Azriel with her as she winnowed.
And then you were alone with the twins in the River House, much quieter than it had been all morning.
"So... Are you two fine with starting to bake now?" You asked both of them.
"That sounds perfect, Y/N!" Nuala said, clapping her hands together.
"We do have a Solstice present that we'd like to give you early, though," Cerridwen offered.
You thought back to the aprons you had gotten for the two of them. "In that case, I have one for each of you as well."
"Meet in the kitchen in five minutes?" Nuala asked.
"That sounds fine," you said, already rushing over to the stairs.
As promised, the three of you reconvened in the kitchen a few minutes later, all of you holding presents behind your backs.
You passed the two gift bags over to them, and they both handed you a small box.
They insisted that you go first, so you carefully opened the wrapping paper, then the boxes, met with your own set of pink measuring cups and spoons, their size engraved into the handles in the first box. In the second was something that looked similar to a magnifying glass, but the twins showed you its use quickly by having it hover over the recipe book Elain had gifted you.
The glass read out the title, "Decadent Desserts of the Solar Courts of Prythian," and tears filled your eyes.
"It will help you read recipes, or notes, anything really, if the two of us aren't available. We thought it would be a nice gift, seeing how your family has forgotten to teach you to read. This way, you can teach yourself," Nuala explained softly as she passed the glass back to you.
"Not that we wouldn't love to teach you, but... I don't think your feelings about that have changed yet, right?" Cerridwen asked.
You wiped the tears from your eyes as you nodded. "Yes, but this is... This is such a fantastic gift, thank you both so much." You wrapped your arms around the two of them, feeling like you were embracing sisters. "Go ahead and open your presents, I know they aren't much-"
"Oh nonsense!" Nuala interrupted you as she pulled out her apron, running her shadowy fingers over the golden fabric. "This is beautiful, Y/N!"
"I love it, oh, look! They have matching embroidery, Nuala!" Cerridwen said excitedly, running her fingers over the stitching. "These are just perfect, Y/N, thank you." It was your turn to be embraced by them, and you gladly soaked in their kind words and true enjoyment of the present you had gotten them.
"Now that we have presents done, should we get to baking?" You asked, already moving to pull out mixing bowls.
"There's no time like the present," Nuala said, and the two of them sprung into action, grabbing necessary ingredients and cookie sheets.
Baking with the two of them was a wonderful experience, as it always was, but today felt a bit different.
It felt like you were finally having the family holiday time you had craved, baking for Solstice with both of the twins.
The time flew by, and by the end of the day the three of you had made nearly everything you had wanted for tomorrow, the only sweet left unfinished was the sugar cookies. The dough for those was left in the cold box, and all of the other sweets were left on the counters overnight.
Together, the three of you made and enjoyed a hot meal, and ended the night sipping tea and eating a few of the goodies you had made earlier.
The next morning was easy, pleasant as you cut out little trees, ornaments, stockings. You all giggled over your attempts to make an Illyrian cookie, which turned out more like winged blobs.
While they were cooling, Nuala and Cerridwen made frostings in every color possible, and you packed up the tins of sweets for your family members.
Nuala helped you write out little notes of well wishes for each couple, and an extra one for Mor and Azriel stating that you had an extra Solstice present for them that you would give them in person.
And with the presents out of the way, the three of you decorated sugar cookies for the rest of the morning, the color schemes and designs getting more and more questionable as time went on.
That's how Feyre found you at noon, walking into the kitchen after winnowing back from the cabin.
"Feyre!" You exclaimed, dashing around the counter to pull her into your arms. "Happy birthday! Do you feel any older yet?"
"Thank you Y/N," Feyre giggled, squeezing you back. "Not yet, I still feel like a baby."
"Well, you are a baby still, Fey. At least compared to most of Velaris," you said cheekily, smiling when she swatted your shoulder gently.
"Yes well... This baby and my baby are hungry, are you ready to leave for lunch?"
You nodded. "Let me get my coat and boots on, and then we can go."
"Okay, I'll be here," Feyre smiled, and then her eyes locked on the cookies. "Can I have one?"
"Of course you can have one Fey, you're the birthday girl after all!" You said before you left the room, hurrying up the stairs to grab your outerwear.
By the time you returned to the kitchen, Feyre was sitting on a stool, decorating a cookie with precise strokes, turning one of the blobby cookies into something that resembled Rhys.
"That's a pretty cookie, Fey."
Feyre's head snapped up from where she had been entirely focused on her decorating. A light blush dusted her cheeks as she said, "Thank you, sissy. The girls told me you all tried to make Illyrians, and I thought they were just too cute to not do one of Rhysie."
"Well, you did a lovely job. Shall we go?"
Feyre nodded and stood from her stool, licking a small bit of frosting off of her thumb. "You made some really good cookies, Y/N. Are all of the tins filled with them?"
You shook your head. "No, they're filled with everyone's favorites, the sugar cookies were more for everyone. When you go back to the cabin, would you be able to take them with you? If not, I can give them out tomorrow."
The two of you walked to the front door, you opening it for Feyre and shutting it behind you. "I should be able to manage that just fine, sissy. Now, I was thinking we could go to Arlina's, I feel like pasta."
"Pasta sounds nice," you replied, letting Feyre lead you at a leisurely pace, locked arm in arm as the two of you took in the snow covered city.
Arlina's was a cozy little bistro only a few blocks away from the River House, tucked between some apartment buildings. You had been there once before, a few months after you had been brought to Velaris.
Once the two of you were seated across from each other in a booth, you pretended to look over the menu, but you already knew you would be getting the same thing you had last time. It had been very good, and you also wouldn't have to ask for help reading the menu...
The food was as good as you remembered, and your and Feyre's conversation stayed light, mainly focused on Feyre's duties and her hopes for her future, now that she has a little one on the way. You preferred talking about her, talking about your life right now... Would be a bit of a mood killer. And today was about Feyre.
During dessert- a delicious crème brûlée that you and Feyre shared- Feyre started to fidget.
Not much, but enough that you noticed.
"Yes, Fey?"
Feyre sighed at being caught. "You know how Starfall is coming up?" She asked.
Your narrowed your eyes in suspicion. "Yes?"
"I was hoping that you would go dress shopping with me- us," she corrected. "I want you to feel included, and it would be really nice to go dress shopping as sisters, like we were never able to."
Your first instinct was to say no, but this was Feyre. Feyre, who was sitting across from you and giving you her best puppy dog eyes.
You sighed. "Fine, but can you tell the two of them to behave again? I know that they have... Issues with me, but I would like to feel comfortable in a room with them again at some point."
"Oh, I've already told them to behave. Honestly I should have done it so long ago, it's not fair to you. From now on I'll do my best to make sure you can feel comfortable in the family again, okay?" Feyre said honestly, and you finally believed her.
"Okay. What day were you thinking about going?"
"I was thinking in two days time, I have a few meetings tomorrow, and that revel I was telling you about, so most of us will be busy then."
You nodded your head. Two days. You could prepare yourself for Nesta and Elain's inevitable scrutiny over two days. Especially with your evening plans with Mor tonight. "That sounds fine to me, Fey."
Feyre smiled at you widely before taking another bite of dessert.
🤍💝🩵💝🤍
The rest of your afternoon with Feyre flew by, your short walk back to the River House led to presents.
You had given her her gifts first, soaking in the absolute joy in her eyes when she realized that you had gotten her two gifts for her pregnancy journey, already telling you about what she wanted to paint for the first month. And the hairpin she absolutely adored, promising to wear it tomorrow night to the revel after sealing it with her own drop of blood, as you had with yours.
She had nervously handed over your own Solstice present, an apron that she had made for you. It was in a light pink, with slightly clumsily sown stitching, but you loved it so much. Something that she had made, just for you.
You had bid her goodbye after the two of you decorate a few more cookies, her arms now loaded with two bags, filled with tins of sweets.
You made Nuala and Cerridwen rest while you cleaned up, taking care to get every last bit of dough or sugar off of the counters and each dish cleaned.
After, you retired for your room for a while, a bit of light cramping having you in the bath again, soaking in the heat.
Just a few minutes after you had finished getting dressed, you heard Mor yelling something from downstairs.
With your slippers on, you exited your room and went downstairs, happy to see an excited looking Mor sitting in the living room, a couple of gift bags sitting on the coffee table in front of her.
"Happy Solstice!" The blonde said brightly, bouncing out of her seat to wrap you in her arms.
"Happy Solstice to you too, Mor," you giggled after she let you go, air returning to your lungs. "Did you want to do presents now?" You asked, gesturing to the bags on the table.
"If you'd like, or we could wait a little bit. I'm fine with either!"
"I'll go get yours, then," you said, and did exactly that, returning a few moments later, excitedly shoving a bag into her arms. "Open it!"
Mor did so, gasping when she pulled the boots out, and squealing when she saw the matching gloves. "Oh mother Y/N, these are perfect! Thank you so much!" The blonde exclaimed, pulling you into a hug. A playful look crossed her face, a smirk on her lips as she said, "Do you know what these would be perfect for?" You shook your head. "That stupid revel tomorrow! I'm already wearing this tiny little black dress, and these would look stunning with it."
"That does sound like a good time to debut them, it'll probably drive Keir up the wall," you joked.
"Yes it will," Mor sighed happily. "Now, open your gifts! Honestly I should have given them to you earlier, now that I think about it, but they'll still be useful."
Mor had given you several pairs of underwear, these specifically spelled with cycles in mind, making it so there was no noticeable scent, and also designed to come clean with no staining every time. In the same bag was a square herb filled pack, designed to be heated and kept against your skin as a way of minimizing the pain of cycles. Both were such thoughtful gifts, but you were most excited for the underwear. That meant less scathing looks from your judgmental sisters.
The second bag contained a large assortment of bath products, from bubble bath soap to deliciously scented bar soaps, to salt mixes that were supposed to help with aching muscles. She had managed to fit in a bath pillow, one that's able to get wet without being ruined, as well as a few face masks that appeared to lay over your face.
"Mor, these are such wonderful presents, thank you," you said gratefully, pulling her into a hug.
"I thought you might like them," Mor chuckled. "After all, you can never have too many self-care products in my humble opinion."
"Mhm. Humble," you giggled at her. "Did you have anything specific planned for tonight, or are we winging it?"
"Well, I thought we could do some extra skincare, I've already got an order of food in at Sevenda's- I got you curry." You nodded in approval. "And we can talk about how amazing those macarons you made were!"
You blushed under her gaze. "Nuala and Cerridwen helped..."
"Oh, it was all you, Y/N. I'm sure they helped a bit but you are such a wizard with baking!"
You almost went to deny her praise again, but thought better of it when she narrowed her eyes playfully at you.
"Skincare?"
"Skincare," Mor smiled, and let you lead her up the stairs and to your room.
The evening you spent with Mor was great, the two of you eating your takeout in your bed once it arrived, clay masks on your faces. You talked about the last couple days, Mor complaining about how the citizens of the Hewn City treat her, you opening up about how hurt you were over your sisters' gifts.
"I can't believe they forgot, though, Y/N. That's not something small, and I'm shocked that they haven't attempted to teach you yet..." Mor said disapprovingly. "I could help you, if you'd like?"
You shook your head immediately. "No, I'll be able to teach myself now, with a gift the twins got for me. It reads out the words it passes over, isn't that neat?" You asked, hoping she would understand that you'd rather not speak about the subject much.
"That was very thoughtful of them, I wish I'd thought of it!" Mor sighed. "I do hope that you feel more welcome here, now? Than a few weeks ago, I mean."
You glanced at her, seeing the emotion in her face. "I am, Mor. You've been a big part of it, I hope you know," you said softly.
"Good, I'm glad I can help. And you're just such a lovely person, it's hard not to want to spend time with you."
You blushed once more under her gaze. "Thank you, Mor."
"Any time, love."
The endearment she used had a pretty face flashing in your mind, a question on your tongue.
"Is it..." you trailed off, unsure if you wanted to ask the question.
"Is it... what?"
"Is it... normal...? To... to uhm..." you started nervously. "Is it normal to like girls...?" You asked Mor quietly, half hoping she would ignore your question.
"Like... To like girls as friends, or... To like girls like boys?" Mor asked cautiously.
"The... uhm... Boys."
Mor sighed, but not one of disapproval. You didn't think...
"Of course it's normal to like girls in that way, sweets. Maybe not for everyone, but I know that... I know that I do," Mor answered softly.
You turned your face to her, finding her cheeks pink, maybe for the first time since you had known her. "Really?"
"Yes, I've known for a couple of centuries, now. I still like boys some, but... I do find girls much more interesting." Relief flooded your heart at her words. "Can I... Ask what brought this on?"
"Oh, well... When I went shopping for Solstice presents, I met this really pretty shop owner, Irina? And I... I felt how I used to feel around... Cassian," you admitted.
"Well, Irina is very pretty," Mor said wistfully. "You have good taste," she joked as she nudged you gently with her elbow, getting you to smile.
"I do, don't I?" You giggled, feeling lighter with how accepting and calm she had been. The two of you sat in silence for a minute, before you had an idea. You looked over at Mor, a glint in your eyes. "What do you say to eating far too many cookies and passing out from so much sugar?"
Mor's eyes shined brightly in the candlelight of your room. "I say yes."
The two of you snuck downstairs, even though you didn't need to, it just felt right with the copious amounts of sugar you were about to consume.
You set to making a pot of tea while Mor grabbed a sinful amount of cookies and set them on the tray. She carried everything up to your room, you trailing behind her.
Mor had grabbed all of the sugar cookies that you and the twins had decorated all silly, including several deformed Illyrians that the three of you had attempted to make look like the three in the Inner Circle. Plus one of the ornaments that Cerridwen had written swear words on, claiming that she 'couldn't fit any other words on them.'
After a bit more talking, and all cookies eaten, Mor left your room so the both of you could change, and returned a few minutes later with hot chocolate for the both of you, a mound of whipped cream nearly overflowing from the mug.
"I'm really glad you suggested this, Mor," you said quietly once the two of you had laid down in your bed, all candles extinguished. "It's been really nice."
"I'm glad I did too, Y/N. This is a lot more fun than the bickering that I'm sure happened tonight at the cabin, that lot can never go too long in a confined space without arguing about something," Mor complained lightheartedly.
"You included, Miss Morrigan." Mor scoffed at the implication. "Tell me that you don't enjoy the drama a little, hmm?" She remained silent, and you giggled. "That's what I thought."
"Well, it's not my fault that they're so easy to bicker with..." Mor said sulkily before yawning. "Alright, I'm exhausted. Who knew eating cookies and takeout could be so tiring?"
"Not me," you said, yawning a moment after. "I guess that's our cue to try and sleep," you laughed.
"Sounds like a plan to me," Mor said quietly, her breathing evening out a bit as she tried to sleep.
You tried to do the same, but it took a while, with the now unfamiliar noise of someone sleeping near you. But soon enough, you had drifted off into a peaceful sleep, cushioned comfortably for the first time in months.
🤍💝❤️💝🤍
General Taglist: @daughterofthemoons-stuff @lilah-asteria @meritxellao
Series Taglist: @darkbloodsly @angelbunny222 @uniquedreamsblog @romantasyreader28 @that-one-bibliophole @idkmyoldonewasembarassing @deathtopistachios @saltedcoffeescotch @sleepylunarwolf @babypeapoddd @kingshitonly @bravo-delta-eccho @bluebries81 @liahaslosthermind @deepestmentalitypersona @historygeekqueen @hermajestysworld @marina468 @esposamultifandom @astrokitty18 @larissa01-blog2 @acourtofbatboydreams @angel-graces-world-of-chaos @thelov3lybookworm @weekendlusting @dxjaaaa @thejediprincess56 @casiiopea2
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purinfelix · 2 months ago
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Heyyyy, I'd like to request mistletoe for franco colapinto please<3
- so it'd be based on the doorstep/cue cards scene from the movie love actually (which goes so well w the xmas theme🤭) when mark shows up at juliet's door w several signs to declare his love ("to me you are perfect | and my wasted heart will love you | until you look like this | [insert ugly pic]")
BUT i need it to be happy and not angsty please😭 bc in the movie, mark's love is unrequited (juliet married his best friend)
Thank you sm if you end up writing this, I've been loving your fics since you appeared on my feed🫶🏻🫶🏻
say it's carol singers ⟡ ݁₊ . - franco colapinto
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w/c: 800 a/n: arghdfjghdbf i'm so sorry this took me FOREVER to get to it's just that i got massive writers block half way through - but thank you !! i hope u like it <333
this is part of my 1k event - check out the rules here!!
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"I'll get it!"
At the sound of a doorbell, you jump up from the couch where you and your roommate had spent the entirety of your day. Finally free from the worries of final exams and with Christmas rolling around, binge-watching cheesy romcoms had seemed like the perfect way to kill time.
As you reached for the doorknob, your mind ran through the possibilities of who could be behind it - maybe your neighbours asking if you wanted their leftover gingerbread or a delivery guy with the pizza you had just placed an order for. What you hadn't been expecting was to be met with a boyishly handsome face you knew all too well, a stack of poster-size cards and a radio.
"Oh, hi," you let out, trying to hide your surprise.
"Who is it?" your roommate's voice calls out, and you're about to answer before Franco hurriedly pulls a finger to his lips to stop you. Confused, you watch as he swings the stack of cards around to reveal a message.
"Say it's carol singers."
Intrigued, you oblige. "It's carol singers!"
"Oh, whatever," your roommate laughs, resuming her movie, though your feet stay in place. He bends over, setting down the radio and hitting play, and soon a floaty version of 'Silent Night' begins playing. You furrow your brows in confusion, but he doesn't say a word, instead flipping over the top card to reveal more words.
"I know we haven't spoken in a while."
'A while' is an understatement, considering that you haven't even seen each other in over a month - or however long it had been since you had ended an almost year-long relationship with one of Franco's closest friends.
After that, it seemed like there was no reason for the two of you to talk anymore, even if you had gotten to know each other rather well. Mostly because it had been just that fact that had catalysed the sudden end of your relationship - your boyfriend unhappy with how close you had gotten to Franco, and yourself growing more weary of just what that closeness might mean.
Through it all though, you had tried your best to keep Franco unaware of his involvement in the end of your relationship, and to this day he still didn't know a thing.
"And maybe this a bit weird, considering the terms we ended on."
Or so you thought.
You watch as he continues to flip through the large cards he's holding, eyes darting up to meet his every time he reveals a new message. It's strange, the fact that you're not even stopping to realise how ridiculous this situation is - that he's here, holding handwritten cards and leafing through them instead of just talking to you like a normal person.
"But just because it's Christmas - and at Christmas you tell the truth."
But the earnest look he keeps on giving you convinces you that maybe saying these things out loud may not be the easiest thing for him, and so you continue reading.
"To me, you are perfect."
The realisation hits you as you silently mouth the words he's written.
"And my wasted heart will go on loving you, forever."
You don't know what urges you to do it, but you're stepping out through your doorway, your arms reaching to grasp either side of his face - pulling his lips to crash into yours. He's just as surprised as you are, but you hear him drop the cards onto your doorstep, freeing his hands to wrap around your waist.
When you finally part, you're almost breathless, face flushed with shock and a sudden embarrassment.
"I thought that," Franco's just as out of breath as you are, "I thought you-"
"So much for a wasted heart," you laugh, tucking a couple stray strands of hair behind his ear.
"So you-" It's almost as if the shock of the situation is making him unable to finish his sentences.
"Yes, Franco, for ages."
"Oh, thank god, I was really nervous about coming here and making an idiot of myself."
"Where did you even get the idea from?"
"Saw it in a movie," he admits sheepishly before letting out a soft relieved laugh which is music to your ears. Even more so than the crackly carol that streams through his radio, which you've accidentally kicked down a step.
He lets go of your waist momentarily to pick it up, stop the recording, and gather the cards he's dropped, though you notice there's one more you haven't read.
"What does that one say?"
He flips it over revealing the final message - "Merry Christmas."
You let out a soft chuckle before cupping his face close to yours once more, your voice barely above a whisper.
"Merry Christmas, Franco."
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taglist:@spreadyourwings-my-smiling-angel @alelo23 @scill-a @multifan-idk @presleycaudle
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midnightwinterhawk · 2 months ago
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I found this unfinished fic rec list in my google docs and I have no idea what the theme was supposed to be so I'm setting it free into the world. I've read all of these more than once but that's the only common thread I can see. 😂
Since @outtoshatter told me to publish it (many, many months ago) this is dedicated to her.
The One You Choose by @asterekmess
13k | Mature
Stiles hadn’t seen Scott in over a week, except for glances he caught during school hours.
Sex Therapy by Asterekmess
51k | Explict
Stiles wanders into a club named Eclipse, looking for a one night stand to help him get over his breakup, only to realize that he has no idea what he's doing. Luckily for him, Derek is happy to be his Yoda.
The only problem comes when neither of them are able to keep it to just one night.
In One Kiss You'll Know All I Haven't Said by @aussiebee
1.7k | Teen
Derek accidentally kisses Stiles goodbye. They aren't dating.
It becomes... a thing.
we are the resistance by @callunavulgari
7k | Mature | (Pacific Rim au!!)
“So,” Stiles says after a moment. “Werewolves.”
“It’s a thing,” Derek murmurs sleepily.
Stiles chokes on a laugh. “Yeah, I realize that now. I just, I don’t know why I expected anything different. We live in a world where giant aliens attack every few weeks through a trans-dimensional portal at the bottom of the Pacific, why wouldn’t werewolves exist?”
[Hilary Duff Lyric Redacted] by calrissian18 (@wellhalesbells)
40k | Explicit
Stiles hadn’t been in Beacon Hills in five years, hadn’t seen Derek in nearly as long, when he got the text:
New number: (+530) 365-2421
or
An abundance of overeating and geekery, dangerous caffeine/sugar cereal addictions, surprise werewolves, bird insults, purple-eyed shrimp, reincarnated serial killers (it's cool, he has a leash), poorly played professional baseball, and a love story. In that order.
stuck in reverse by @crazyassmurdererwall
65k | Explict
Look, Derek is the worst. Everyone knows that. Their fearless leader is a total and complete failwolf.
Which means the rest of them? Are kind of the worst too. They’re a ramshackle, slap dashed, sorry excuse for a pack that’s about a half second away from getting one of them killed. And this is a problem, because Stiles would really like to survive high school. Thanks.
Still, no one deserves what Derek has gone through. Nobody.
And it’s about time somebody told him that.
Step into the daylight (and let it go) by dearericbittle
14k | Mature
Stiles is a grad student with serious insomnia. So when he sees a stranger in need of help, he thinks it’ll be a good way to allevbore the boredom. How the hell was he supposed to know that the weird guy with the baseball cap was a famous actor (and a fucking werewolf)? He just keeps running into the guy. Coincidence? Stiles thinks not.
Come with Me and Walk the Longest Mile by @devildoll
40k | Explicit
"Stiles shouldn't accept rides from werewolves he meets behind abandoned convenience stores." In which the zombie apocalypse is just one of their worries.
of gods & monsters by @dexterous-sinistrous
6k | Mature
“I’m not the best at conversation. I’ve been told I have no finesse for it.”
Stiles took a step closer to Derek, pushing the billowing silk out of the way. “And what would you say if you looked at me now?”
Derek looked up, startled for a moment when he realized he was now looking at Stiles’ unveiled face. He was silent for a beat, taking in Stiles’ features for the first time, convinced he would never see such beauty unveiled for him alone.
Painted Wooden Letters by @discontentedwinter
10k | Teen | (Stiles & John with a tiny side of Sterek)
All he ever wanted to be was Stiles Stilinski.
Smoke & Mirrors by doodle
69k | Explicit
"Mirror twin, actually,” Stiles corrected automatically. “It’s a subset of identical, but we’re not identical in the normal way. I'm the mirror image of him, or him me, whichever way you want to look at it."
Stiles has spent his entire life in the shadow of JJ, his popular, captain of the lacrosse team, jackass twin brother. Now he only has to make it through the summer until JJ goes to college.
Easier said than done when JJ starts hooking up with Stiles' crush, Derek Hale, and there's a dead body in the preserve.
Windows by @drgrlfriend
83k | Explicit
Derek has a new neighbor who won't stop looking.
Excerpt:
“You’re blind,” Derek said flatly, the anger draining from him so suddenly he felt almost woozy. His vision cleared, his claws sliding back into blunt fingernails.
“Thanks for the memo, genius,” the kid said acidly. “I can still fucking defend myself, so don’t take another damn step.”
“Fuck, I...I’m sorry,” Derek stuttered.
“What?!” The kid’s brow crinkled. “I mean — what?! You’re fucking sorry!?” His lips thinned into a harsh line. “What, is this some kinda Hallmark movie where you’re discovering the error of your ways because you don’t want to rob a blind person?! That’s fucking condescending, man. I’ll have you know that —”
“Just, wait.” Derek interrupted what was apparently the start of a convincing argument as to why he should rob the kid after all, feeling his head start to spin. “This is — it’s a misunderstanding. I’m — I’m not robbing you. You’re — you’re safe, okay? I’m taking three steps back. Just — just let me explain.”
“Explain why you came busting into my apartment? Yeah, go right ahead, man, I can’t wait to hear this epic tale.”
Watch as the waves, fall back into place. by DropsOfAddiction
32k | Explicit
Derek rakes his eyes over Stiles’ exposed arms and his gaze lingers on the lithe muscle there. The evidence of years of staying in shape, working as an FBI field agent is blatant and was he always that hairy?
Derek’s mesmerised by the dark hair running up his arms and it’s only when Stiles clears his throat and flails his hands at him that Derek manages to bring his eyes to his face.
Stiles’ brown hair is longer and he looks taller somehow, fitting his body in a way Derek’s never quite seen on him. He looks totally comfortable in himself, propped there against the jeep like he does this every day, like he’s not making Derek readjust his entire world view, just by being there.
Derek scents the air blatantly and he steps closer to him, pleased with the way Stiles’ heartbeat spikes a little, despite his cool demeanour.
“Hey Hale. Looking good,” Stiles grins, still not moving an inch, even when Derek’s only about a metre away.
lovely, dark, deep by @elisela
3k | General
Stiles floats.
That’s all there is to do; the day is sunny and warm, like every other day he’s been in this pond, though he’s not sure how long that’s been. Sometimes he thinks it hasn’t been long, but whenever he tries to think about it, he … forgets. He told Kate once, when she came out to the garden late one night and let a fox tumble from her hands onto the ground, and she’d patted his cheek and told him that merpeople weren’t known for anything but looking pretty, so she wasn’t surprised to hear he didn’t have many thoughts in his head.
Sometimes it bothers him, that he can remember every day he’s been in the pond but nothing before, but if he thinks about it for too long he forgets that, too.
By Any Other Name by @entanglednow
33k | Explicit
He doesn't know his name, he doesn't know who he is, and neither does the werewolf he's on the run with. But he's pretty sure they hunt monsters, because they seem to be really good at it.
Hide Of A Life War by @etharei
26k | Explicit
“We have received confirmation that there is a hostage situation in progress at a warehouse compound two hours out of Los Angeles, following a multiple-vehicle pileup on Highway 101 this morning...”
The one in which Stiles has lived to (legal) adulthood and, along the way, become a bit of a badass himself.
One Dollar Yoda by exclamation @adventures-in-a-world-of-fiction
11k | Mature
Stiles is an unbonded spark, so he's been dealing with courting alphas since he was ten. It's gotten a lot worse since he turned sixteen. Some are assholes, some are nice, but Stiles hasn't wanted to spend the rest of his life bound to any of them.
When Derek Hale shows up at his school, Stiles expects him to be just another asshole alpha attempting to buy him with expensive gifts. But Derek Hale puts no effort whatsoever into his courtship gifts. Stiles ought to be offended but instead he finds it refreshing.
On my Way by Gia279 (@outtoshatter)
18k | NR
Huge black paws smacked the window, followed by a fuzzy face smooshing up against it.
He scrambled over the gear shift, tipping into the passenger seat. Bear, he thought hysterically. It had to be a bear, a freaking bear.
A big pink tongue rolled out, lips pulling back as the creature panted.
Forward Motion by Gia279
9k | Teen
Stiles and Claudia have just opened their magic shop, finally moving to a brick and mortar store instead of selling potions and amulets from their kitchen.
Derek is having strange dreams, and Peter keeps asking him to go pick up some weird herbs from the new shop while the rest of the Hale pack is in an uproar preparing for their chaotic winter celebration.
Stiles has not one but two embarrassing run-ins with Derek before he manages a conversation with him, and Claudia gets the last laugh.
Shifted by Gia279
48k | NR
What the fuck? Stiles’s eyes snapped open. He leaped back.
A semi-truck blew by, horn blaring in annoyance.
Stiles looked around. His heart quickened at the unfamiliar shadows. His phone rang again, startling him. He fumbled it out of his pocket to answer, fingers sliding awkwardly over the screen.
“Where are you?” Talia’s voice snapped with urgency.
Stiles looked down. His feet were bare and dirty, but he’d still been wearing jeans when he fell asleep. “I’m not sure.”
flint & tinder by grimm
43k | Explicit
Casting spells, chasing monsters, wooing your coworkers and fucking them in their offices - it's all in a day's work for Stiles Stilinski.
North of Salem by @halehathnofury-blog
85k | Explicit
The world is ending in a fight between the supernatural and human worlds. On the front line there are packs that keep the threat at bay and one of them is run by an Alpha wolf and a Spark.
Quack (Stiles Stop Calling It That) by @isthatbloodonhisshirt
16k | Teen
“Stiles, I’m serious, I need a favour.”
“That sounds like a trap,” Stiles Stilinski muttered sleepily into both his pillows. “You know,” he continued when the man in his room made no move to leave, “you’d think I’d be used to this. My dad, coming into my room, smacking my ass to get me out of bed, waking me up at the ass crack of dawn—”
“It’s almost one.”
“—waking me up at the ass crack of one,” Stiles continued without missing a beat, “and asking for a favour. Given my life growing up with you, you’d think I’d be used to this by now. I think the reason this hits so hard now is that I specifically bought my own apartment so that you couldn’t wake me up at the ass crack of dawn—”
“Stiles, it’s almost one.”
“—so that you couldn’t wake me up at the ass crack of one.”
Words Cannot Espresso How Much You Bean to Me by isthatbloodonhisshirt
68k | Teen
“You’re late,” Derek informed him coldly, jaw clenched. He barely even moved his mouth to speak. This guy was seriously scary.
And because Stiles was suicidal, he said, “No, I’m Stiles.”
The look he got could’ve curdled milk. Stiles even noticed that Derek’s muscles were tensing, arms bulging even more and wow this guy was scary and hot but mostly scary holy shit.
“You’re not funny,” Derek informed him coldly.
Stiles shrugged. “I think that’s a matter of opinion.”
Puppy Love by @jerakeenc
7k | Teen
"You stole half the dogs in town," his dad says, hands on his hips. "I should arrest you."
"They're in protective custody," Stiles corrects him. He's trying to sound serious, but it's almost impossible when you have a Pomeranian eating your hair.
Waiting Games Jerakeen
6k | Explicit
Being an only child and heir to the throne, Stiles had always known he may not have the luxury of marrying for love. When he’d realized he was an omega to boot, things had taken an even more uncomfortable turn for him.
Omegas are rare. An omega as the heir apparent is almost unheard of.
Which is why there is no wiggle room when it comes to the tournament.
Don't Worry Baby by @kalpurna
20k | Explicit
"You know you're allowed to ask for vanilla sex, right?" he says, afterwards. "We can do whatever you want. That's kind of the point."
Derek doesn't respond.
The (un)Usual? by @rhysiana
28k | Teen
Stiles works nights at the local college-town diner. Derek is the weird, taciturn new regular who apparently needs huge quantities of food in the middle of the night. Stiles is determined to figure out why.
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d3wdropz · 5 months ago
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Brothers AU! Sukuna Fluff Headcanons: Yuji crushing on Sukuna's s/o
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Summary: Things with Sukuna have been going good, you're both happy and it's about time that you meet his family. The only issue is that Sukuna didn't take into account that his younger brother might take a liking to you too.
Warnings: no curses! au, fluff, swearing, some mention of deceased parents, sukuna being sukuna, hopefully that's it
Gender neutral! Reader
Lovely divider from @benkeibear !
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♡- When you and Sukuna first got involved with each other, it was nothing serious. There was an understanding that you both just wanted to have fun with no commitment
♡ - This set up worked just fine- for a while
♡ - At some point, you both stopped seeing other people and became exclusive, spent more time together just talking and bonding
♡ - This is when Sukuna realizes he needs to have an important conversation with you, he's never been this into a relationship before, but he knows that he has some baggage that you should know about
♡ - On your end, you're just about ready to say 'i love you'- it's been a few months of messing around and about half of that was you both falling for each other.
♡ - So when you two are hanging out it's obvious that you both have something on your minds, it's not ruining the mood just an obvious need to talk
♡ - You both hold it off until the end of the night when you're in his car and he's dropping you off. Before you leave you give him a kiss and end up just leaning on his shoulder
♡ - It's the perfect moment to tell him, something out of a movie- so you look into his eyes and see just how soft he's become for you. Sukuna's not the type to show his love through words, even physical affection is hard for him- so he depends on small gestures; the love in his eyes, how softly he holds your hand, remembering your favorite foods and filling up your gas tank
♡ - Sukuna's thinking about just how much he wants to be with you for the rest of his life, and that means he can't keep important things from you. It's one of the few times that he's nervous, what he's about to tell you could be a deal breaker
♡ - You smile as Sukuna closes his eyes as you both speak up
♡ - "I love you/ I've got a kid"
♡ - While Sukuna is blanking at what you said, you're chewing him out
♡ - "Sukuna, wtf? You have a kid? When? With who? Where is it???" You are so confused and a little upset- this is something you can't just throw out there
♡ - When he comes back from his thoughts, he takes the time to explain everything to you
♡ - Turns out he in fact, does NOT have a child- rather he helps raise his younger brother, Yuji with their grandpa. Sukuna opens up about how their parents died when he was 10 and Yuji was just 3, that he's been helping take care of him ever since
♡ - Sukuna explains that, while Yuji is in their grandpa's custody, he's old and can't do much- so Sukuna stepped up and handles most of the responsibilities: helps with rent, cleaning, food, but mostly Yuji
♡ - It's a lot to take in, probably the most he's told you since he met you so it's your turn to be shocked
♡ - He leans back in his seat and sighs, "Listen- I get if that's a deal breaker- shit, it would be for me"
♡ - You take in the info dump before you realize just what he said at the end and you have no choice but to massage your temples, "Sukuna, babe, what the fuck?"
♡ - At that, Sukuna gives you a frustrated look before you keep talking
♡ - "First off, that was a lot to process- don't get me wrong, I'm happy you opened up to me, but damn you could've picked a better way or method or something" you sigh and grab his face "Thank you for telling me that... and no that's not a deal breaker- you're stuck with me, you moron"
♡ - The relief he feels is unimaginable, like a weight just got lifted off his entire body. Instead of saying anything, he just leans into your hands and sighs- you know just how relieved he is
♡- With that out of the way, you both go back to normal for the next few days- until you bring up Yuji
♡- "So, when am I gonna meet him?" This time you're both lounging at your place, he's in the kitchen making something while you're picking out a movie
♡- Sukuna's a little surprised before he responds "Well shit, didn't think you'd wanna meet the brat so soon." He's bringing the food over as he sits down next to you so you can both make a plan
♡ - The next day Sukuna picks you up and gives you a whole warning speech in the car: "Listen, Gramps can be an asshole, but he really does care. He'll like you, so you should be fine. Yuji's a nice kid, but he can act real immature sometimes so don't expect much from him."
♡ - By the time you make it to his place- a two bedroom apartment- you're dizzy from all the info he just gave you, again. It leaves you a little nervous as you walk up to the door and wait for him to unlock it
♡ - "Yuji, Gramps- we're here!" You take off your shoes and look around- the place is quite clean, something probably influenced by Sukuna and his high set standards. You notice an elderly man sitting in a rocking chair- Gramps you assume
♡- He looks over at you two and starts grumbling to Sukuna, "I'm right here you hellion, don't have to yell" Gramps' eyes soften just a little bit as he sees you before moving back to his grandson for an explanation
♡- Sukuna rolls his eyes and wraps his arm around your shoulders "Hello to you too- Gramps, this is Y/n, they're my partner"
♡- There's a soft smile on Gramps' face as he stands up to shake your hand "This is the first time the kid's brought someone home, nice to meet you." You two click instantly and get to talking
♡ - While this leaves Sukuna pretty happy, he's still got one more thing left to handle, "Hey Gramps, where's the brat?"
♡ - The elder of the two huffs "Who raised you to be so rude- he's in his room sleeping, you punk"
♡ - "The hell you mean 'he's sleeping'? It's almost noon he's got school tomorrow" Sukuna storms off down a hall and you hear a door slam open
♡- Gramps can tell you're a little on edge as he waves it off "That's just how he is with his brother- he can be hard on him but that's how he loves- sometimes the kid needs it"
♡ - Just a minute goes by before Sukuna comes back pulling a miniature version of himself with him- without the tattoos, height, and muscles they could be twins. Sukuna's tearing into him about how he 'needs to grow up and stop binge watching those damn worm movies'
♡ - Yuji's still half asleep as he pulls his arm free and complains about Sukuna being a meat-head, until he sees a random person in the living room "Wait- who's that?"
♡ - Sukuna massages the bridge of his nose and gestures to you "That's my s/o, Y/n- be nice and don't say some dumb shit"
♡- When you shake hands you can't help but gush over him, Yuji was like a mini Sukuna, just cuter and more soft "Hi there, Yuji- it's so nice to finally meet you!"
♡- Yuji can't help but enjoy the softness of your hand, how nice your voice sounds, how gentle you smile at him. It takes Sukuna smacking the back of his head to respond "Oh! Uh- nice to meet you too!"
♡ - Just like with Gramps, you click with Yuji instantly as he goes on and on about movies he likes, his friends at school- it's really sweet and you listen to it all
♡ - Sukuna sits himself next to Gramps on the couch and lets himself relax, the most important people in his life are getting along
♡ - The rest of the day goes great- Gramps shows you baby pictures that you gush over and Yuji seems to be glued to your side, you could be wrong but Sukuna seems a bit jealous that your attention's taken
♡ - Sukuna makes dinner but it's still the same, Yuji takes the seat next to you and Gramps talks everyone's ear off. When it's time for you to leave Yuji's like a kicked puppy until you promise to come back next week
♡ - As your boyfriend drives you home, you tell him how sweet his family is and start making plans to visit again. Sukuna's quiet though, just giving short responses until he kisses you good bye
♡ - "I'm serious, Sukuna- I'm really happy you let me meet them" you're hopping out of the car as he walks you to your door
♡ - This breaks him out of his thoughts as he squeezes your hand and gives you a small smile, "Yea, had to eventually- now go get some sleep, you work at 9 tomorrow"
♡ - When Sukuna gets home Gramps is passed out on his chair with the TV still on, it's not too late so he knows Yuji is still up and he needs to talk to the little brat
♡ - Just as he thought, his little brother is eating chips on the bed and watching some weird horror movie- that is until Sukuna steps in front of the TV and crosses his arms
♡ - "Hey! It was just getting good-"
♡ - Sukuna interrupts him by leaning down and snatching the chips, making Yuji jump "Listen, ya little shit, I saw what you were doing and don't even think about it- one: they're too old for you, two: they're mine so just drop it"
♡ - Yuji's cheeks turn pink "It's nothing, Sukuna! They're just really nice"
♡ - At that the older of the two turns to leave the room, "It better be nothing, brat" Sukuna leaves the room and mumbles one last thing "Cause you're in deep shit if it isn't"
a/n shit this took me forever! sorry- i experienced the worst writers block ever over the past few months! hopefully i'll have more energy and time to write, hope yall like this!
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hexesandroses · 1 year ago
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A semi-long rant about Dottore's implied self-hatred, loneliness and inner struggles
I am, like many others, endlessly fascinated by Dottore, which means that I've been sucking the game dry for any Dottore content I can find; I've watched the dialogue between him and Nahida numerous times, read the "Zandik's Legacy" notes over and over and even the description of the "Wise Doctor's Pinion" from the Pale Flame artifact set. So much has already been said about him, but I'd like to offer my own two cents about an aspect of his character that is often ignored in favor of his villainy: Dottore's inner struggles.
I'll recount everything that I've gathered and tell you of my interpretation of Dottore's character.
To start, one thing that I never see people mention is a line from Nahida's retelling of the Tatarasuna incident. In the very beginning of the cutscene, we see a monster covered in light blue fur (obviously Dottore) who Nahida describes in a very interesting way. She says:
"Once in a while, the monster would take off its fox fur at night, and lament to itself as it gazed at its reflection in the water: "I am a monstrosity, yet they are too foolish to see it. I pity them."
Of course, it's easy to say that this is just a fairy tale Nahida created to preserve Scaramouche's memories and that this could've been made up - which is only half true! We must remember that Nahida has seen Dottore's consciousness. She already knew of the arguments between his Segments when Dottore confronted her to take the Electro and Dendro gnoses. Why do I bring this specific line up, though?
Because this line outright tells us that: 1) Dottore spent sleepless nights in Tatarasuna reflecting on himself; 2) That he, perhaps sincerely, pitied the people of Tatarasuna for not seeing past his facade.
I also think that the use of the word 'lament' is very interesting. To lament means to express sorrow and regret for something. I would think that this implies Dottore feeling remorseful for not just who he was, but what he would do to Tatarasuna. To provide further proof, I think it is important to look at the expression on the furry monster's face (as Nahida portrays it) when it laments to itself:
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(What a cute little thing.)
It looks a bit... upset, doesn't it? Like it is mad at itself as it gazes into the water. This expression, combined with his thoughts and the use of the word 'lament' gives us a clear sign that many ignored: Dottore isn't as shallow of a villain as we thought.
Later in the cutscene, Nahida says:
"But the monster soon found solace when another came to live among the foxes who was not their kin: a kitten, carved from the wood of a white tree, who had been abandoned by the humans."
And in that moment, we see a wide-eyed little monster gazing at the kitten:
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(Feels really silly to use this as an example but you've gotta trust the process)
Here, Dottore found someone like himself. An outcast, a creature that did not quite fit in with the ordinary humans - someone who could understand Dottore's loneliness and ostracization. After getting chased out of his hometown for his blasphemous ideas, after getting expelled from the Akademiya and possibly exiled to Aaru Village for his heretical views - Dottore had finally found someone to whom he could say: "See? They will never accept us. It is you and I against them, for they will never understand us."
What person wouldn't seek companionship, after all?
But things didn't turn out the way Dottore expected them to. Unlike Dottore, Scaramouche didn't need to hide his true identity in order to be accepted by the people of Tatarasuna. Thus, the following happened:
"Furious at this happy resolution, the monster lit a fire on the mountain. The terrified animals panicked as the fire spread..."
... and we know the rest. What matters is this: Dottore was angry and jealous of Scaramouche. Exiled from his hometown, rejected by his peers, insulted and looked down upon just for wanting to destroy the imbalance between Man and God - and along comes a puppet, a creation of the Raiden Shogun, who receives acceptance and guidance from the people of Tatarasuna. Not just that, but the only creature who could share Dottore's loneliness is whisked away from him, proving once again that Dottore will never know what it means to have a true companion.
Thus he tricked Scaramouche into believing that Niwa had betrayed them, had him join the Fatui and later used him as the blueprint for the creation of his Segments. Dottore basically ruined Scaramouche's life out of bitter jealousy.
That should be it about Tatarasuna for now. What I'd like to focus on next is the conversation between Dottore and Nahida in the 3.2 Archon Quest.
There are a few lines that interest me, so I'll go over them one by one.
Dottore uses a lot of big words to sound like he's saying something profound when in reality he's saying nothing at all (a nice callback to his Commedia Dell'arte counterpart), but there is one thing that both he and Nahida place great emphasis on: the fact that Dottore, smart as he is, cannot make peace with himself.
First to say it is Dottore. After asking Nahida for her opinion on his Segments, he says:
"Indeed. It's difficult for humans... to make peace with themselves, not to mention oneself from a different period."
The line still feels out of place. It sounds as if he is musing to himself.
Again, we get a line about his Segments, after Nahida asked him to erase them:
"You were observing me, and that's how you know I've long grown tired of their doubts and endless arguments."
I think it's safe to assume that the arguing is a metaphor for his struggle of self-acceptance. It seems every Segment has something to say to the others, but more on that later.
Nahida uses Dottore's own words against him:
"Like you said, it's difficult to make peace with yourself. Being as smart as you are, have you managed to do that?"
It's important to note that Dottore doesn't answer that question, but even without that, it's obvious to us, the players - of course Dottore hasn't managed to do that.
Whenever Nahida questions the relationship between his Segments, Dottore easily changes the subject. For example:
"Is the relationship between all the versions of you really that bad?"
"I don't think there's any need to dwell on that. The surplus versions of me can be exchanged for a Gnosis. Do you think anyone can offer themselves at a higher price?"
His Segments all argue constantly. When considered that they are replicas of Dottore at different stages of his life, this takes on an entirely new meaning - beyond his facade, Dottore is a man who can barely make out who he is.
Consider this also: in "A Winter Night's Lazzo", Columbina tells him, "You're looking very young today, Doctor."
To which Dottore replies, "You know very well that I do not take that as a compliment."
A piece of dialogue that had been brushed off by many, myself included - until I realized what this might imply. Dottore finds Columbina's comment insulting because he hates who he is. He hates the younger versions of himself because they represent a Dottore who didn't have the knowledge he has at this current stage of his life. They weren't as smart, as knowledgeable. But that's not really the full extent of it, of course.
Dottore was never fully accepted by anyone, this we have established. In the Akademiya, the students called him a 'madman', a 'monster' (as said in the Wise Doctor's Pinion). When we meet him in the 3.1 Archon Quest, he is referred to as 'The Outcast'. He is always being alienated, but could we assume that he just accepted this rejection and decided to embrace the titles people had thrown at him? This is just... very bold speculation, of course. It is impossible to deny that Dottore didn't always naturally stand out due to his heretical views, but I think it's worth considering that he could have just chosen to be the monster people thought of him as. After all, in the confrontation between him and Niwa, Dottore tells Niwa to think of him as a monster and a demon (for a reason that was... meant to be comforting? Not very important right now).
Consider also how different all the Segments sounded when they found out that they were being erased. All of the voices, along with their manner of speech, varied greatly; I interpreted this as proof of the many masks Dottore has worn over the course of his life. Dottore abandoned whatever humanity he had and decided to embrace the mask of a monster, constantly reinventing himself because he isn't secure in his identity - perhaps he doesn't have one at all. He is a scholar, a Harbinger, a researcher - but without those titles, what is left? What is he left with when he sheds those facades? The constant dodging of Nahida's questions about his Segments, the arguments and the worries of said Segments, the introspection in the cutscene about the Tatarasuna incident - indeed, Dottore is a man filled with self-hatred. A lonely outcast who has never known the comfort of kinship. A monster who swallowed his loneliness and dedicated his life to research.
That should be it, I suppose. My brain is fried and if I remember anything that I might have missed, I'll add that info later.
I want to mention one thing: this doesn't mean Dottore is a misunderstood good guy - doesn't take a genius to know that that is not true. Dottore has no regard for human life (which is ironic, considering how he believes humans have great potential and he wants them to be equal with the Gods). He has hurt so many and I'm sure he will continue to do so. He is evil, but it should be noted that he was once just an ordinary human, too. There must be an explanation for why he is the way he is. It's easy to paint him as just a monster because damn he's good at what he does; but I like to think that there is a layer to him that we just haven't fully seen yet. I'm excited to find out more about him when Snezhnaya gets released in like 2 years... ha. If you've read this far, thank you a lot! Curious to know what you guys think. I love Dottore
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marnikula · 9 months ago
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Can u do early seasons spencer x reader who has a lot of problems and they let people walk all over them and they dont set boundaries and they struggle with their emotions. Reader likes spencer a lot but doesn't seek him out bc they feel like he deserves better! And u can decide what happens but make it happy ending :)
Oh my word, I literally spent like 2 hours writing this because I wrote something and then my internet cut out when I posted and now it's lost, so I had to rewrite it. Hope you enjoy!
Cw: gn reader, people dumping work on reader, Spencer being cute
Enjoy!
You were a doormat. You knew it, your friends knew it, everyone knew it. You tried to set boundaries, to say no, but it never seemed to stick. Saying no made you feel guilty, it made you feel like a bad person even though you knew you weren't.
Being a doormat, people tended to walk all over you, requesting ridiculous things of you. That is how it came to be that you were sitting alone in the bullpen, the clock ticking away, showing you that it was around midnight and you still had a whole stack of papers to go through. You felt yourself about to fall asleep, and truly, you were too tired to fight it off when a ding signaled the arrival of someone.
Without even turning to look who it was you knew it was Spencer Reid. You recognized his footsteps, and even if you didn't, the smell he brought with him would have alerted you. It was the smell of coffee mixed sweet undertones, almost as if he had spent his whole day in a café. It was intoxicating. "What are you still doing here?" "Working, I have a lot of stuff to finish before tomorrow" "you mean today" looking back at the clock you could see he was right, it was now officially the next day.
"Do you need some help?" without even waiting for you to decline Spencer took half of the pile you were working on. He moved fast, knowing you well enough to know that you hated asking for help, especially from him, he just could never figure out why.
"Spencer, you really don't need to, I've got this" reaching your hands to take the files back only to be swatted away by the doctor was something you did not expect. "I'm not saying you don't have it, I'm just going to help you so you can go home earlier"
Sighing you admitted defeat and went to go make coffee for the two of you. With Spencer's help you managed to make it through the massive stack of papers on your desk in less that an hour, something you would never have been able to do on your own.
"You, doctor Spencer Reid, are amazing, what can I do to thank you?" it was a slight tease on your part. You didn't expect him to ask you anything return, it wasn't like him, he was too nice . That was one of the things you loved about him, and one of the reasons you willed the crush growing in your heart to shrivel up and die. He deserved so much better than you. Someone with a mind as amazing as his own, someone with kindness rivaling his and someone who knew how to say no. You were none of those. At least not in your own eyes.
"You could go on a date with me" Spencer surprised himself with those words, he really hadn't meant to say them out loud, but he really liked you, and in a moment of confidence inspired by sleep deprevation, he decided to take a chance.
"Really? You mean it?" the both of you were blushing hard at this point, him thinking about how he could have possibly screwed this up and you thinking about how this could possibly get any better.
"I-I mean, only if you want to, you really don't have to feel pressured, I know I said I would take it as paiment, but honestly spending time with you was enough of a payme-" grabbing his face in your hands you turned him to look at you, shutting off his ramblings with the movement and shutting off his brain with your words
"I would love to"
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lxndonorris · 10 months ago
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lick, love, LEC - Charles Leclerc
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Y/N x Charles Leclerc Theme: Fluff (light touching) you're trying to cheer Charles up after the sprint race in China x word count: 1430+ taglist: @game-set-canet is this considered smut, fluff or is there something in between? Got one idea for LN left, if you want to read anyone else, requests are open.
The sun is shining brightly over the Shanghai International Circuit, casting its warm glow over the paddock as the first sprint race of the season comes to an end. Charles Leclerc, clad in his red racing suit, trudges back to his motorhome, the weight of a challenging race evident in his every step.
You, his supportive partner, trail behind him, silently offering comfort with each stride. As you enter the cozy confines of his motorhome, you can't help but notice a slump in his shoulders and the slight furrow in his brow. Today's race was rough, but there is still more to come with qualifying looming ahead.
You watch him unzip his sleek racing suit before taking the upper half off, letting its sleeves hang down his waist. Wearing his suit like this, his fireproofs are on full display. Each seam and stitch speaks of countless hours spent on the track, pushing the limits of speed and endurance.
Charles offers you a shy smile before he sits down, grabbing his phone right away.
With determined resolve, you decide to lift his spirit. Knowing his love for ice cream, you brought along a special surprise all the way from home—a selection of his own brand, LEC. As you open the fridge, the cold air escapes in a rush, carrying with it the sweet aroma of Chocolate Crunch and Vanillove.
"Hey, Charles," you call out, a hint of excitement in your voice. "I've got something to cheer you up."
He turns to you, a faint smile playing at the corner of his lips as he watches you retrieve the ice cream from the fridge. With a gentle motion, you hand him a spoon and settle down beside him on the sofa.
"Y/N." He smiles once he realizes it's his own brand of ice cream. "You shouldn't have." Charles puts the phone away and tries to hide his excitement by running a hand through his face and hair.
"Oh, I should." You nod encouragingly. "I just had to promise not to spoil you too much."
Charles' face lights up right away, and his entire body relaxes slowly.
"Chocolate Crunch or Vanillove?" You ask, holding out the two cups for his inspection.
He studies the flavors for a moment, a flicker of anticipation lighting up his eyes. "Hmm, surprise me," Charles replies, a note of curiosity lacing his voice.
At first, you scoop a spoonful of Chocolate Crunch and offer it to him. Right away, his eyes sparkle with delight, and you watch his lips curl into a shy smile upon tasting the creamy concoction.
"Mhmm, this is so good!" he exclaims, savoring the sweet taste with every bite. 
His enjoyment is palpable, and you feel a surge of happiness knowing that even in the midst of a tough day, you may bring him a moment of joy.
"Here, you try." He offers you a taste, and you accept it with a nod.
But instead of merely tasting the ice cream, you find yourself drawn to him, to the warmth of his lips and the sweetness of the moment. With a tender touch, you press your lips to his, savoring the taste of Chocolate Crunch as it mingles with the softness of his kiss.
When you pull away, a shared smile lingers between you.
"Tastes good." You lick your lips, causing him to giggle again. "Let's try Vanillove."
As you move on to feed Charles the Vanillove ice cream, his eyes light up with pleasure once again. 
"Mhmmm." He embraces the taste on his tongue, licking his lips in anticipation of another kiss. 
"So good?" You don't hesitate and lean in to steal another kiss, the soft taste of vanilla lingering on his lips.
This time, it's a more passionate, longing kiss, and as fate would have it, a small mishap occurs, and a dollop of ice cream lands squarely on his chest, staining his fireproofs.
Immediately, you apologize profusely, your cheeks flushing with embarrassment, and you put the cup down. However, to your surprise, Charles simply chuckles, reaching down to wipe away the errant ice cream with a playful grin.
"It's okay, love," he reassures you, his laughter contagious. 
His easygoing attitude eases your worries, and you admire his resilience in the face of adversity. 
As he inspects the stain on his chest, his brow furrows in mild frustration. With a gentle tug at the fabric, he attempts to smooth out the wrinkles caused by the ice cream.
You watch him with a mixture of amusement and affection, admiring the way he handles the situation with grace and composure. Despite the small mishap, he remains unruffled, his focus solely on rectifying the situation at hand.
With a determined expression, he continues to inspect the stain, his fingers tracing the outline of the fabric as he is trying to minimize the impact.
In this moment, you just admire all of him. As Charles lounges on the sofa, his red racing suit drapes casually over his frame. Despite the challenges of the day, there is an undeniable allure to the way he wears his racing gear with effortless confidence.
Unable to fix it just now, he glances up at you with a sheepish smile, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "Guess I'll just have to keep my suit zipped up for the rest of the day."
You chuckle softly at his jest, appreciating his ability to find humor in even the most unexpected of situations. With a reassuring smile, you reach out to squeeze his hand, silently offering another apology.
As your eyes meet in a silent exchange of understanding and affection, a sense of warmth washes over you. 
With a gentle touch, you reach out to touch Charles cheek, feeling the warmth of his skin and the tingling of his stubble beneath your fingertips.
Charles' gaze never wavers from yours, his eyes shining with a mixture of love and longing.
Without a word, you both lean in closer, drawn together by an invisible force that transcends words or explanations. And as your lips meet in a tender kiss, time seems to stand still.
Instinctively, you find yourself stroking Charles's firm chest. His response is immediate, a soft sight escaping his lips as he leans into your touch, reveling in the affectionate gesture. 
Lost in the moment, you can't help but feel a rush of happiness at the sight of his contented expression. With a gentle caress, you trace your fingers along the contours of his chest, savoring the intimacy of your connection.
As your kiss deepens, you relish in the sensation of Charles's beard gently tickling your skin. With each tender caress of his lips, the soft bristles graze against your check, sending delightful tingles coursing through your body.
Breaking the kiss but still lost in the tender moment, you whisper softly.
"Which flavor do you prefer, Charles?"
His eyes sparkle with amusement as he considers the options before him. With a grin, he reaches for Chocolate Crunch, his choice made clear.
"I'll stick with chocolate," he replies, his voice filled with playful enthusiasm.
You nod in agreement, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips. "Sounds perfect. I'll have vanilla then."
With your choices made, you exchange a knowing glance before diving back into your respective cups of ice cream. As you indulge in the sweet treats, each spoonful a delight to the senses, a wave of contentment washes over you.
Still, you can't help but let your eyes roam all over him, his beautiful face, his firm chest and arms, and his thighs.
With a playful grin, Charles catches your eye and strikes a pose; his chest puffs out ever so slightly, accentuating the contours of his fireproofs. There is a hint of mischief in his gaze, a silent invitation to admire him even more.
With a fond smile, you reach out to trace the intricate patterns of his fireproofs, your fingers dancing lightly over the fabric. Each touch sparkles a thrill of excitement, a reminder of the passion and intensity that fuel his every race.
"You know," you begin, your voice soft, "today may not have gone as planned, but tomorrow's a new day. You've got this, Charles; I believe in you."
He turns to you, his gaze filled with gratitude and affection. "Thank you," he whispers, pressing a kiss to your forehead. "Having you here makes all the difference."
With the taste of ice cream lingering on your lips and the promise of tomorrow's challenges ahead, you move a little closer to one another and enjoy the sweetness dancing in your mouths.
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milliesfishes · 4 months ago
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౨ৎ꣑ৎBodies Are Not the Only Things Buried౨ৎ꣑ৎ
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꣑ৎ"Even if it is full of love, all a ghost can do is haunt."꣑ৎ
[fem reader] contains: mentions of death/dying, angst pairing: ghost!billy the kid x fem reader author’s note: tagging @kellielovesmovies <3 and @these-travels <3 because we talked about doing more ghost billy!! Enjoy! Pinterest Board Spotify Playlist
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"Have you ever seen the ocean?"
Billy turned his head to look at you, and his breath would have hitched if he had any left. The sunlight reflecting off your skin gave you a glow that was nearly angelic, and for a moment he was sure the higher powers had come for him after all. You blinked, nuzzling your head into the crook of your elbow where it lay, and he wished it was his arm there instead. Holding his girl. The way it should be.
He shook his head, shifting on his side. "When my family crossed to get here I did. But I don't remember much. Was a long time ago."
Your lips puckered just slightly, and he longed to touch his own to them. "I've always wanted to see it but I've never been."
Imagining you in the backdrop of ocean spray, sand sticking to your soaked feet, Billy smiled. "You'd fit right in."
With a giggle like bells, you looked back at the sky, your ever-present smile soft as spring's first rain. The grass framed you perfectly, making a soft bed that Billy didn't deem near good enough. Once again he tried to will his body solid. There was no need for a beating heart or blood siphoning through his veins. He only wanted to hold you.
Death made life feel like a distant memory. The more time Billy spent with you, the more painfully clear the difference between existing and living became. Consciousness was a curse, carried out by the remnants of him left like a half-eaten dinner. Maybe somebody had forgotten to take the final step and bring him wherever those he had known in life were. Or maybe they were lingering too, in different pockets of time's fabric. He had certainly never come across anyone like this.
Maybe you had been the only one who bothered to see. Or care. Either way, he had been revealed to you, the veil separating life and death lifting for a quick second so he could escape. And you were there to see it.
You spent a great deal of time at the cemetery, keeping him company. Often you would lie on the grass with a book and read to him, the passages you picked from between hundreds of pages only enhancing the complexity of your beauty.
It was natural he would fall in love with you. In the beginning he had felt it coming, a universal fact already set in motion. It was almost cruel, and he wondered if perhaps his forced haunting hadn't been a mistake at all. He could be atoning for every sin committed in life in some new method of torture where he was made to think himself joyful.
It was delicate, his dormant love a cobweb formed over decades of starvation. An emotional ache he had resigned to live with for the rest of time. If he had known death was this impermanent, he never would have wished for it.
You rotated on your side to face him, eyes reminding him of daisies. Young and fresh and lovely, innocence shining through your new bloom. Billy's attention was immediately piqued, ready to absorb whatever you had to say, even if it was a single word.
"Have you ever left this place?" He smiled when you asked, wholly enraptured.
Sitting up, Billy leaned against his headstone. Unmarked, unnamed, only the year he died carved crudely into the rounded shape. It made a good resting spot for you some days, though, and he was happy some facet of him was able to do so. "Not for a long time."
"Why not?" you asked, propping yourself up next to him, chin on the heels of your palms. The image of you was so painfully adorable that he had to pause before speaking.
"I dunno," he shrugged, looking at his boots. "It seems odd, but I've never thought of it."
"Never?" You tilted your head.
"I've never had a reason." He half-smiled. "You're the first person I've talked to in a century, sweetheart."
Something softened in your eyes at the term of endearment, and he was now making plans to call you it over and over just to see that look. "You never had wanderlust?"
Billy moved his hand so it was flat on the ground next to yours, pinkies nearly touching. "I wandered so much when I was alive, it must've just burnt out."
Somehow, he couldn't read the look on your face, as though your thoughts at the moment were in another language. He wished more than ever right now that he could draw you into his arms, maybe rest a hand at the crown of your head. There were so many things he desired, and you were at the center of each one as he orbited hopelessly.
He'd never had a sweetheart before. Through every misdeed and trial thrown under his feet and scratching his arms like thorns, he'd never found anybody. Further, he never expressed the desire, not out loud.
Love was always considered a luxury. He'd observed it plainly with his mother and father, witnessed the lengths it traveled and the way it grew to fit the space of new circumstances. But his parents had been good people, trying to make an honest living. He never thought love was meant for men like him.
But without survival on the line, what else was there to think of? There wasn't anything else to exist for, especially when the woman in question was you.
Without physical feelings, Billy ran on pure emotion. It was an energy of its own that replaced what his blood must have done. For so long it had been justified sorrow, but now it was something else. Something he didn't even want to think of because it was so out of the question.
He was a ghost. You were alive. Nothing more needed to be said.
Stretching your arms with a little hum, you shut your eyes and let your hair fall to the side, over your shoulder. He watched it cascade like a waterfall, wishing for the millionth time he could brush it from your eyes. "You know, you could travel if you wanted to. See everything you want to." Opening your eyes, you smiled at him with a little glimmer that lifted his spirits. "You could see the ocean and remember it better this time."
Billy wouldn't tell you what he was thinking. That the only way that desire would enter him is if he could do it with you. See that adorable look of astonishment when you tasted salt water for the first time.
He didn't let his thoughts go any further than that. Instead of saying it, he smiled. "You'll have to see it for me, darlin'."
You looked up at him, resting your cheek on the cool stone of his headstone. If he imagined it right, your ear was on his heart instead of a monument to his death. His girl. In his dreams you were his girl.
Months since you'd first seen him, when he'd expected you to be frightened but instead you were kind. Ghost or outlaw, it seemed any time he was given was to be spent unconventionally. Based on your reaction, it was easy to imagine you in the context of his time. Maybe you never would have judged him the way everyone else did.
A shock of warmth coursed through his spectral being when you simply said, "Your time didn't end when you died."
It echoed, bouncing off the cemetery gates long after you left for the night.
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Everything except Billy's existence was glaringly temporary.
He had long accepted the fact that his fate was to stand still, frozen as an unseen relic of time while the world hurtled forward into a future he couldn't have imagined. Regretting his legacy, coming to terms with the fact that he was existing in a space where he couldn't change anything.
Long had he wondered of this purpose. Whether it be by punishment or pity, he was immoveable. And now more than ever it was becoming glaringly obvious that you weren't.
"Long day," you sighed one evening, flopping down next to him. He reached for your hand, wincing as his hand passed through like you were water. But when he made a move to pull it back, you shook your head, half smiling briefly. "Keep it there. It feels nice."
Billy smiled, turning to the side to look at you as you began to chatter, playing with a rogue strand of hair. "I got some news today."
"Good news?" he asked, and you smiled tightly, still anxiously fidgeting.
"An opportunity to travel. And go to school," you went on softly. "In London."
London. There was a pang in his chest. "That's incredible, sweetheart." Billy lowered his head to meet your eyes, where you were staring at the ground. "You've worked hard."
There was that half-smile again. "Thank you." He could see something brewing in you like a storm on the horizon, but didn't press. If you wanted to tell him you would.
After a beat of silence, you whispered, "I was excited about it. It would get me away from home." Billy's thoughts conjured the one time you had told him about your parents. About your mother's passing, and how your father had married a woman who hardly regarded you. He couldn't help but sympathize, thinking of his own mother and the cruel man she'd been forced to wed. The idea of you in that kind of situation kicked his protective instincts in, and it hurt that there wasn't a thing for him to do about it.
Billy nodded, searching your gaze. "You should be."
"And they have an amazing arts program."
"Of course."
"And it's beautiful- I've always wanted to go there." You were staring at him now. "The ocean is close. Closer than it is here."
He smiled. "It is."
Your eyes stayed on him, and he looked right back. It felt like you were trying to tell him something, but he refused to pry at it. Slowly, the corners of your lips turned down as something was defeated within. Without another word you breathed out, leaning down and resting your head in his lap. To his dismay, your head went right through his thighs, landing on the soft earth below.
Neither of you commented. He hovered a hand over the outline of your head, pretending to stroke your hair.
In the next weeks, you didn't broach the topic of school again, instead returning to your regular graveyard activities. Talking to him and smiling as if he was something extraordinary. Picking flowers that grew nearby and braiding them together, leaving them in little bouquets sagging at the base of his tombstone. He memorized every bit of you and tried to piece it together in the hours you weren't there, an endless puzzle.
The beginning of the end was impending, kicking up dust. He could feel it in his being, filling the space where his bones used to be. It wove marrow and tendons out of feelings, creating a whole other entity for him to inhabit. There was no end to Billy's endings.
You were lying side by side with him now, hair spread out like a halo over your head. When you opened your mouth, he heard it before you spoke.
"I'm going to school in London."
Billy let it stretch and consume him, show him what would never be. This was a routine. This was not new. "I'm happy you are. You're gonna do great, sweetheart."
Somberly, you whispered, "I leave in two weeks. To get adjusted to the new country."
He was quiet, just watching your expression. You were holding yourself together and he didn't know why.
Then in a quiet burst, a tear slipped from your eye, leaving a path on your cheek as it trickled down like rain on a windowpane. "Billy I don't want to leave you."
It hit him like something earthshattering. The shot that had ended his life hadn't collided the same way this did, with a force that came from somewhere in the folds of existence, somewhere Billy didn't understand. He sat up, reaching a hand out. "Sweetheart-"
"Tell me not to leave," you whispered, and he froze, watching another tear cross your cheek. "I won't leave if you want me to stay."
"You have to go," he said, shaking his head and getting to his knees, searching your eyes. "This is your dream. You have to do it."
"But I don't wanna go," you sniffled, reaching for a strand of hair and twisting it between your fingers. "Billy..."
"Hey," he breathed, hands over your elbows. "Sweetie, I'm always gonna be right here. And the time we've spent together's enough for me. I want you to live."
"I love you," you managed through your tears, lower lip trembling.
Billy shut his eyes, chin dipping. The fingers of melancholy were seizing him in a way that kicked everything that had ever mattered to the side. Your tears were multiplying, and they were of such a quality that he swore they were what dotted the sky every night. Stardust...that was what you were. Unreal. For him, untouchable.
He risked a look back up at you. You, whom he'd imagined as his for so long. But you weren't because he couldn't have anything anymore. The only thing Billy possessed was a sliver of humanity enclosed as an idea. He didn't even have a heart to give to you.
But there was nothing in him for the truth to hide behind. It was transparent as he was. "I love you too."
You took in a shaky breath. Billy knew right then that for the rest of time he would be committed wholeheartedly to you. You were the only thing in this wretched world worth anything. Tension heightening like a string pulled taut, you surged forward in a single motion, arms encircling his shoulders, pressing your mouth to his.
Warm. It had been so long since he'd been warm. But you were. Between his arms, encasing whatever was left of him in the gift of your body. He hardly registered the sensation of being kissed until you pulled back, breaths leaving your prettily parted lips in quick bursts.
Kissed. He had been kissed. He had kissed you.
"I didn't think that would work," you confessed quietly, and in a natural move, he reached up and brushed a strand of hair from your eyes, something jolting in him when his fingers didn't pass through.
Billy shook his head, drawing you in by the waist and touching his lips to yours gently, relishing the sensation of you melting under his touch. He wouldn't dare try anything else, this new allowance precarious. Who knew if it would be taken away from him? Your hand found the collar of his shirt, just holding it as his nose bumped your soft cheek. Soft...he could feel that you were soft. Just as he'd imagined.
Conscious of your need to breathe, he separated himself from you, just a little. The last of your tears escaped, and he thumbed them away, not wanting to let go now that he had the option. You whispered, "I can't leave. I love you."
The chasm within him began to open again, and he could see the way it could have gone. Past and present and future. Every version of you and him spun until they disappeared into nothingness, leaving reality standing still, a tower of his own making. A structure he couldn't tear down if he tried.
He breathed, "I love you and that's why you have to leave."
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The curtains of the summer were drawn shut, and sometimes Billy wondered if any of it had ever been real. He loved you too much to make you stay, to leave you hanging off the whim of a dead man with nothing to give forever.
He wished you hated him. It would be easier for you to leave.
Any writing on the wall was faint, and he'd been unsure if you'd go through with it. But after the day you were set to leave marched by without so much as a glimpse of you, he bowed his head and thanked whoever was above. Guilt would have tainted everything if you had stayed. He would rather love you miserably than be responsible for the end of another life, especially yours.
Time went back to how it was before. Boundless and brutal. Billy existed in the plane of memories, staring at the sky and letting it consume him.
He hoped for many things. That you would love it when you got there and forget all about him. That you would fall in love because everyone should fall in love with you.
Most of all, he hoped you would never return. He hoped whatever had tethered you to this place would unravel and blow away, off to some far away corner of the earth where you couldn't reach.
Regret tainted him oftentimes, and he wondered if he could leave like you had said. Go find you wherever you were and remind you that even the dead were enchanted by you.
Billy imagined sometimes what would have happened if you stayed. If maybe when you loved him so closely he would have eventually become whole again, not quite alive but not a ghost any longer. Physical. Worthy. Maybe it would have been proof to whoever had damned him this way. He was alive so long as he was loved. It could have been his second chance. The one leniency he'd snuck in the margins of his death's contract.
He let that dream rot with his body, buried in the earth below.
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yeeterthek33per · 1 year ago
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Jealousy's a B**** (Steph Catley x Reader x Caitlin Foord)
A/n So this is officially my fifth attempt at this, I've accidentally managed to post it twice, way too early, and I'm honestly still not happy with it.
Also, sorry it took so long, y'all. 😅
But yeah, Caitley Fluff. (Caitley? Staitlin? Stetlin? Coord? Catoord? Fortley? Footley?)
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Caitlin's been acting weird lately.
She's more clingy than usual, hands finding some part of you whenever you're just feet from each other.
You're sure Steph's noticed it too, but she hasn't said anything either. Just that she has a knowing look on her face whenever Caitlin latches onto you for the fifth time in an hour.
Normally, you wouldn't have minded, but when she does it at training... it gets a little distracting.
Particularly when practising marking for corners. It feels like she uses every opportunity to be pressed against you. She goes out of her way to mark you, to be the first to mark you despite not even sharing positions.
Her hands find your waist, gripping you tightly, and you have to smack them away with red cheeks so that you avoid being both held in place and also teased by the others.
She doesn't do it with Steph as much, but it's still prominent when you aren't a part of the drill.
Usually, you're pretty observant of anything going on with your girlfriends, but this has you completely befuddled.
Well.
That is until the game against Chelsea.
It'd been rough from the start, both teams eager to get the london derby underway from the start of the season, eager to see who could test the other the most in the coming days.
With Arsenal out of the Champions league, this was the most important game for your team to win. Arsenal needed to set itself up for precendence early.
With that came physicality. And fast. Every opportunity for a header was met with being held down by the waist. Every time you had the ball, it was met with a slide tackle. Every run was met with being held back by the arm or your shirt.
It was getting on your last nerve.
You knew the captain and her partner well. You loved them both like family, having spent years growing up with Magda and others playing on the same team as Pernille. Playing at Arsenal was the only time either of you had been separated.
Unfortunately, that fondness didn't translate onto the pitch.
Magda was the first one to take your feet out from under you, and Pernille was constantly on you, both of them knowing how well you linked up through the midfield and that you were a constant danger at any time on the ball.
Football is a physical game. You knew that.
But it was getting a little out of hand at this point.
Which brings you to now.
There's a foul just outside the penalty area winning Arsenal a free kick, which converts into a corner after the ball ricochets off Cuthbert.
Stood in line waiting for the in, you shift, ready to leap up for the header. As soon as the ball is lofted into the box, hands grip your waist, preventing you from making the header.
You shake it off the first time. And the second time.
The third time, Magda completely takes you off your feet, and you hit the turf with a groan of frustration. How was the ref not catching any of this?
The fourth and fifth times, you brush it off, but you can see Caitlin practically death glaring Magda as the swede pulls you up again.
What you didn't see was the constant hole Caitlin was boring into the Chelsea Captain's head when she even so much as stood near you. It got particularly bad when Magdalena dropped you on your butt.
The last time it happens that half, Caitlin spins around to yell to the umpire. The sideline ref spots it too, Magda is warned but nothing more.
Caitlin growls but returns to position with a look from you.
Half time can't come quick enough for you. The lockeroom is alight with various chatter as they all fire off strategies and mid game plays that need to be fixed. Your girlfriends sit either side of you, Caitlin's hand tightly gripping your leg, a beset half glare on her face.
"I need you all to just keep pressuring. My strikers, you're doing good, but it's just getting in for those shots where you need to be. Try to shake your defenders."
With a nod from all of you, you all make your way back to the pitch in a hopeful search of goals.
It's just minutes into the next half when it happens, you fight the hold, but in the end, you hit the pitch again. This time, it sets off the firey striker.
She sees you get pulled down and sees red, she gets right up in the captains face with almost no hesitation.
"What the hell is your problem?" She shoves the swede away from you, followed by the piercing screech of whistle behind her.
"Nothing, what's your problem?"
Magda shoves back a little, which leads to the others quickly pulling her away.
"Keep your hands off her. It's that simple Eriksson."
Realising your partner is about two seconds away from a yellow, you jump between them, too, quickly grabbing her by the shoulders to walk her away from the situation.
"Alright, that's enough outta both of you. Caitlin, you need to cool it. Do not get booted for this. It's not worth it."
"But she-"
"Caitlin! It's not worth it. Let it go."
She grunts but walks away, accepting the yellow card pointed in her direction.
The rest of the game goes as smoothly as it can. Occasionally, you catch Caitlin getting a little pushy with Pernille, too. But it's nothing major in the end, and the whistle blows in a nil all draw.
Exhausted but still in an okay mood given the results, you walk around to shake hands with the chelsea players and specifically go find Magda as well.
"Hey Magda, sorry about earlier, you know how feisty she gets. I'd say she's sorry as well, but-"
The blonde chuckles.
"Probably not, given the glare I'm receiving right now. Speaking of, how are your lover girls?"
You smile softly, a small flush creeping up your neck.
"Loving, sweet, caring as usual. Normally well behaved, I swear." She laughs at that.
"It's fine. What happens in the game stays in the game. Sorry about dropping you on your butt a lot there."
She winces slightly. You just jab poke her in the ribs and wrap an arm around her shoulders.
"Nah, that's nothing. It's not the worst thing you've done to me." It's a soft prod and she huffs at you.
"Excuse me. I thought we let that go already. Just because we used to torture each other as kids."
"We? You mean you used to do it. I was a total angel as a child."
"Oh, I'm sure you were, I heard all about your innocent professions from Magda's mum."
Pernille wraps her arm around your other side, hand ruffling your hair.
"Yeah, just like you weren't getting pushy either today." You look up at her, being unfortunately shorter than the platinum blonde.
"I have no idea what you're talking about søde."
A nudge from you makes her chuckle.
You chatter away with them in your second language, having learnt Swedish whilst living with the captain in sweden from the age of 10.
Your parents were travelling business people (Magda would call them deadbeats, but that's another story) having moved to Sweden when you were just five, growing up next to Magda for five years before your parents wanted to move back to Australia.
However, given that you'd become so close with the Eriksson family, they quickly agreed to let you stay with them, the travelling lifestyle rather cumbersome on a child your age.
You loved your parents, but they were more deadbeat than they liked to admit, and so Magda's mother became like your own, and Magda, a sister to you after accepting adoption by the swedish family.
As you banter away with them, Caitlin watches on from her position by the bench, a small scowl on her face.
They were clearly way too touchy with you. Pernille kissing your cheek occasionally, Magdalena's arm wrapped tightly around your waist, occasionally brushing away your hair as you talk animatedly, a small blush on your cheeks at one particular moment makes the heat rise in her chest.
But she wasn't jealous.
No.
Why would she be jealous?
A small poke to her side brings her out of her thoughts.
"What's up with you, grumpy?"
Steph's shiteating grin makes her roll her eyes.
"Nothing."
"Uhuh, right, like I'm sure Eriksson and Harder haven't felt the holes you're glaring in the side of their heads either."
She scoffs.
"I am not." Her cheeks turn red at the incredulous look she receives in return.
"Babe, you do know they're not flirting, right? Magda definitely isn't into her, and as far as I can tell, those are loving sibling noogies our girl is receiving from Pernille."
Caitlin turns back to you. Steph's right. Still, she doesn't like the way they're holding you.
At some point, you must feel her staring because you look over with a soft but mildly concerned smile, raising a brow in her direction.
She shakes her head and turns away, arms still folded across her chest as she moves to go into the locker room.
"What's up with your girl, Stephy?"
Steph chuckles softly.
"Oh, nothing. Just our girl getting attention from her adoptive sister, apparently. I don't think she knows."
Beth snorts.
"No, I don't think she does either."
They watch as the pair continue to rib you, eventually hugging them goodbye and promising to meet up at some point in the next week or so. Wandering back over to Steph, theres a mildly confused look on your face.
"What happened with Cait? Is she still upset over Magda taking me down?"
Steph shrugs.
"Maybe. You know why?"
You shrug as well.
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The bus ride back is even more confusing.
She ends up planted in the spot next to you but far too quiet. Normally, she's sat next to Katie, where the two would be either bickering, playing card games, or giving each other shit over small plays during the game.
None of that, though, and it stays that way until you've returned home.
"Okay, what's going on with you? You've been quietly sulking since we got back."
The forward shrugs in response, having been pretty silent for the whole ride home, save for occasional hums as you and Steph chat about team drama and the girls' post game antics as well.
You exchange a look with Steph, who looks like she knows more than she's letting on with the small smirk that pulls at her lips.
Confused by the action, you turn back to your other girlfriend, whose eyes are locked on the ceiling now, avoiding your meeting your own.
You can't think of any reason she'd be upset. The game hadn't been majorly eventful aside from that one yellow card. Magda certainly wasn't malicious in her tackles, so there's no way she'd be holding a grudge over that. You'd basically gone straight home after the game, too.
She was acting fine up until-
Oh.
Oh.
A mischievous grin crawls across your lips, and you move to sit in the striker's lap, surprising her mildly.
Your hands force her to look up at you.
"Baby, were you jealous?"
She scoffs, stumbling slightly over her words.
"Wha- no, I have no idea what you're talking about."
You sit back slightly, hand on your chin in faux confusion.
"Hm, I could've sworn you were glaring at Magda and P earlier. You saw that, right, Steph?"
You turn to the brunette, who is watching on clearly amused if anything.
"Oh, I sure did, I mean, if looks could kill."
You chuckle at the pout that makes its way onto Caitlin's face.
"I was not-"
She huffs at the growing smile on your face.
"It's really cute that you think they were flirting, baby. But no, there's no reason for you to be jealous, baby."
"But I wasn't jealous. They were just far too touchy, and-" the raised brow you give her makes her sigh softly.
"Okay, maybe a little bit, but still, they were all kissy, and it was getting way too touchy."
"Babe."
"But honestly they kept hugging you and after the game where they kept holding you and tackling you and-"
Cutting off her rambling, your finger sits on her lips and you hush her.
"Cait. I grew up with Magda. She's my adoptive sister. And Pernille definitely was not flirting. She's far too taken with Magda. Plus, she treats me like a little sister, too."
"Oh." Her cheeks flush.
"Honestly, baby, I thought you knew this already?"
Her cheeks go a little redder.
"No, why would I know? You've never told me about that."
"I'm out with them every other week. I usually tell you both, too."
"When? The only time you go out with friends, all we get from you is 'Hey, you two, I'm going to lunch with my sister and her girlfriend-' oh."
Both you and Steph lose it at that, Steph face palming as she falls back onto the couch, chest shaking with laughter.
You bury your face into her shoulder, shoulders jumping as you try to hide your giggles.
Caitlin rolls her eyes affectionately.
"Yeah, yeah, very funny, you two."
It takes you a minute to catch your breath again, hands moving to cup her cheeks, eyes alight with mirth.
"You're adorable. God, I love you. Also, wanna talk to us about why you've been extra touchy lately, too?"
She shakes her head and pulls you down to kiss her fully.
"Shut up."
You chuckle but comply, letting her have her way for now.
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Caitlin didn't think she'd end up getting the third degree on her day off, but here she is, being teased mercilessly, stuck between you and Steph while you all rib her about last weeks game and the hickies you turned up to training with.
Between Steph, Beth, and occasionally Magda and Pernille, it really wasn't ending.
"Honestly, I don't know how you two didn't see it, really. She looked ready to implode after you kissed her cheek."
"I did not!"
"Baby, please, you were so red in the face."
"I'd just played 90 minutes. What do you expect?"
Beth pokes the girl with her shoe.
"Please, there was steam coming out of those ears."
Laughter rings out across the table.
"Tell me again why you thought I was flirting during the game by tackling her?"
Caitlin rolls her eyes at the swede.
"I didn't say that either."
You scoff playfully, turning to the chelsea defender.
"Ah yes, the swedish charm never fails you, huh Mags?"
"Sweeping girls off their feet since age ten."
Caitlin shakes her head.
"Okay, but like, what about the handsyness during the game? Harder, you were the worst of it."
The dane shrugs.
"It annoys her. That's literally it. Frustrate your opponents, and you have an easier time winning."
You scoff.
"Excuse me, don't say it like it actually worked."
"It did work."
"What part of a draw means you won?"
"I just said it worked."
"Clearly." You cock a brow at her.
The blonde flips you off, taking a sip of her coffee.
You poke your tongue out at her. Pernille chuckles, turning to her girlfriend.
"Childish. See babe, what did I tell you?"
"That I'm clearly the more mature and better looking sibling? See Caitlin? You have nothing to be jealous over. There's no way my girl would leave me for this thing."
Beth snorts and Steph has to cover a laugh when you take a swipe at the blonde.
"Bitch!"
While the other's watch on amused as you both bicker, Caitlin simply smiles, realising she definitely has nothing to worry about and reminds herself how much you show her love constantly.
Her clinginess had come from nowhere, so she'd blown it off.
Steph, however, knew well where it came from. Caitlin just got jealous easily, regardless of her protests to calling it that. Jealousy really is a bitch.
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roseofhybrids · 3 months ago
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there's something I've been thinking about recently, and tonight seems like a good enough occasion to talk about it
back when I was in therapy, every session my therapist would ask the same question
"What is something you're looking forward to this week"
The first time she asked that, I just figured it was a part of getting to know me as a new patient. Building rapport and trust and such. But when she repeated it every time I spoke to her, it made me wonder why she'd ask that specific question every time
Well, after thinking it over for a while, I think the reason she asked that is because it's really important to have something to look forward to regularly in life. Even if it's something small, as long as it's something you can find a little joy in See, nearly every time she asked me that, my answer would be that I was looking forward to my weekly DND game. It wasn't something too grand, just me and a few others messing around for 2 hours on roll20. But I felt happy when DMing for them, it wasn't much, but it still something that brought a little bit of fun every week
I feel like that's a critical part about staying alive on the day to day. Your life doesn't have to be filled with every day excitement like you're living a wealthy influencer lifestyle in order for you to carve out a bit of happiness for yourself
Like I said, it can be something small. Maybe it's DND games, maybe it's seeing the new episode of a show you like air, maybe once a week you let yourself order a pizza or eat out, maybe you and some friends get together to a watch a movie. Could even be that you just set aside a few hours where you can do something you like, literally anything as long as it brings you some enjoyment. Just a bit of time when you don't have to be productive and working and worrying about everything
I know the idea of doing something just for yourself can feel selfish, like you're wasting precious time. Especially with everything that's going on in the world, it can make you feel guilty for letting yourself find joy when some many others are suffering and in danger
Take it from someone who spent the latter half of their schooling dealing with dysthymia, self harm, and constant panic and anxiety attacks. Feeling nothing but misery 24/7/365 will help nothing. Depriving yourself of any positive emotion day in and out will fix nothing. All it will do is land you in either the grave or a mental hospital, and you certainly won't be able to help anyone from either of those places
If you want to help others, you'll have to be able to support yourself first. And that means not letting the stress of being alive build up to the point of crushing you under its weight. Take an hour or two every few days to let yourself truly breathe and relax. Think of it as fortifying your self for what's to come. You'll need some way to maintain your strength through the storm if you ever want to see the other side of it I'm not saying to ignore the bad parts of life, just don't ignore the good parts either. Even if you have to make those good parts with your own hands Eventually, the world will get better. But that will take time, so you will need to work to ensure you are around long enough to see it
This week, I'm looking forward to the new Dandadan episode, and going to get my new dog his name tag This month, I'm looking forward to making Thanksgiving dinner and getting to have some turkey and pumpkin pie Next year, I'm looking forward to starting a project that I've been thinking about for months
What is something you are looking forward to?
you don't gotta tell me it if you don't want to, just make sure you have one
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herweirdass · 4 months ago
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the waitress 2 | vh
part one here!
A few weeks had passed since Vinnie had mustered the courage to ask Y/N out for coffee. What started as a simple hangout had quickly blossomed into something more, something neither of them had quite expected but both had secretly hoped for. Their connection was effortless, and Vinnie found himself looking forward to every text, every phone call, and every chance he had to see her again.
Tonight was no different. Y/N was coming over to Vinnie's place for a laid-back movie night, something they had been doing regularly. As Vinnie prepared the popcorn, he couldn't help but smile at how natural it all felt—how comfortable they'd become with each other. He'd already set up the living room with pillows and blankets scattered across the couch, dim lighting creating a cozy atmosphere.
When Y/N arrived, she greeted him with her usual bright smile, making his heart race the way it always did. She was wearing one of his oversized hoodies, something she'd started doing more often, and he loved it. 
"Hey, you," she said, walking into the kitchen where he was pouring the popcorn into a bowl. She gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before stealing a handful of popcorn.
Vinnie chuckled, pulling her closer by the waist. "You always do that," he teased. "I don't even get to eat any before you've taken half of it."
"Well, that's because I'm saving you from yourself," she replied, grinning up at him. "You know you'd finish the whole thing before the movie even starts."
He laughed, loving how playful she was. "Alright, alright. Let's get this movie started before you eat the rest of the snacks."
They settled onto the couch, Y/N curling up beside Vinnie, resting her head on his chest as he draped an arm around her. It felt perfect, like they fit together seamlessly. The movie started, but Vinnie found it hard to focus. Instead, he spent most of the time glancing down at Y/N, marveling at how lucky he was.
She noticed his gaze and smiled softly, tilting her head to look up at him. "You're staring," she pointed out, playfully poking him in the side.
"Can't help it," Vinnie shrugged, tightening his arm around her. "You're kind of hard to look away from."
Y/N rolled her eyes but smiled, snuggling back into him. "Well, don't get too distracted. You promised me we'd watch this one all the way through."
"I'm trying, I swear," he said with a laugh. "But you're just too cute. It's distracting."
She laughed, her fingers tracing lazy circles on his chest. "You're such a sap, you know that?"
Vinnie grinned, knowing it was true. Being with her made him feel soft in a way he hadn't expected. With Y/N, it was easy to let his guard down, to be vulnerable. She never pressured him to be anything other than who he was, and he loved her for that.
Halfway through the movie, Y/N shifted, sitting up a little so she could look at him. Her expression softened, her eyes filled with warmth. "Vinnie, can I tell you something?"
He nodded, his heart skipping a beat at the sudden seriousness in her tone. "Of course. What's up?"
She bit her lip, as if trying to find the right words. "I just... I want you to know how much I appreciate you. Like, for real. You've made me feel so safe, and I've never had that before. Being with you feels... different. In a good way."
Vinnie's chest tightened with emotion as he listened to her. He reached up, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "Y/N, you don't know how happy that makes me. I feel the same way. I've never been this comfortable with anyone before. You make everything feel easy, you know? Like... it just works."
She smiled, leaning down to kiss him, this time slower, more meaningful. It wasn't just the sweet, playful kisses they often shared. This one was filled with emotion, like she was pouring her heart into it.
When they finally pulled away, Y/N rested her forehead against his, their noses brushing lightly. "I'm really happy, Vinnie," she whispered.
"Me too," he murmured, his thumb gently brushing her cheek. "I didn't expect this when I walked into the restaurant that night. But now... I can't imagine not having you in my life."
She beamed, her eyes shining as she kissed him again, a little lighter this time. "Well, you're stuck with me now. Hope you're ready for that."
Vinnie chuckled, pulling her back into his arms as they both lay back down on the couch. "I wouldn't want it any other way."
For the rest of the night, the movie played in the background, but neither of them really paid attention. Instead, they talked, laughed, and enjoyed each other's company, wrapped up in their own little world. Vinnie felt a warmth in his chest that hadn't been there before, a sense of peace he hadn't realized he needed until Y/N came into his life.
And as the night went on, with Y/N asleep in his arms, Vinnie couldn't help but think that maybe, just maybe, this was what it felt like to be in love.
The next few months were like a dream for Vinnie and Y/N. Their relationship had deepened into something more than either of them had ever expected. It wasn't just about the excitement of new love anymore—it was the little moments that made them feel like they had found something real and lasting.
One Saturday morning, Vinnie woke up early, sunlight streaming through the window, casting soft golden light across the room. Y/N was still asleep next to him, her face peaceful, her hair slightly tousled. He loved mornings like this, when everything felt quiet and perfect, as if the world had paused just for them.
Unable to resist, he leaned over and kissed her forehead softly, not wanting to wake her just yet. But Y/N stirred, her eyes slowly fluttering open. She smiled sleepily when she saw him.
"Morning," she mumbled, stretching a little before snuggling closer to him.
"Morning," Vinnie replied, his voice gentle. "Did I wake you?"
She shook her head, her arms wrapping around his waist as she rested her head on his chest. "No, but if I'm being honest, I'm glad you did."
He chuckled, running his fingers through her hair. "I was just thinking how perfect this is."
Y/N tilted her head up, her eyes meeting his. "Yeah? What's perfect about it?"
"Everything," he said simply. "Waking up with you, having these quiet moments. It's... I don't know, I've never felt this content before. Like, even the smallest things feel special when you're around."
She blushed slightly, her heart swelling at his words. She reached up to cup his face, her thumb brushing over his cheek. "You're making it really hard not to fall even more for you, you know that?"
He smirked, pulling her closer. "That's the plan."
They lay there for a while longer, wrapped up in each other, neither of them wanting to break the peaceful silence. But eventually, Vinnie's stomach grumbled loudly, breaking the moment.
Y/N laughed, sitting up. "Alright, Mr. Hungry, I guess that's our cue to get out of bed."
"Or," Vinnie said, raising an eyebrow, "we could just stay in bed and order breakfast."
She playfully pushed him. "We can't stay in bed all day, Vinnie!"
"Why not?" he teased, grabbing her hand and pulling her back down next to him. "I don't see the problem."
Y/N rolled her eyes but smiled. "Okay, maybe just a little longer."
They ended up ordering pancakes and bacon from a nearby café, and when it arrived, they sat in bed eating, talking about everything and nothing at all. Vinnie couldn't stop himself from stealing glances at Y/N as she laughed at one of his jokes, her face lighting up the way it always did. Every moment with her felt easy, as if they were perfectly in sync.
As they finished breakfast, Y/N rested her head on his shoulder, letting out a happy sigh. "You know, I think this might be one of my favorite days so far."
Vinnie smiled, his hand finding hers and giving it a gentle squeeze. "Yeah? What makes today so special?"
She looked up at him, her eyes soft. "Just being with you. It's like... I don't need anything else. We could be doing absolutely nothing, and it would still be the best day."
Vinnie's heart swelled at her words, and in that moment, he realized just how deep his feelings for her had grown. He wasn't just falling for her—he was already there.
"I feel the same way," he said, his voice quiet but full of emotion. "You're it for me, Y/N. I've never felt this way about anyone before. I—" He paused, his heart racing. He hadn't planned on saying it, but the words were already on the tip of his tongue.
"I love you."
Y/N's breath caught, her eyes widening slightly as she processed what he had just said. For a moment, she was silent, and Vinnie's stomach dropped, worried that maybe he had said it too soon. But then she smiled, the brightest, happiest smile he'd ever seen.
"I love you too, Vinnie."
Relief washed over him, and without another word, he pulled her into a deep kiss, one that felt like it was sealing the moment between them. When they finally pulled apart, they were both grinning like idiots.
"Wow," Y/N said, her voice a little breathless. "That... that was perfect."
Vinnie chuckled, resting his forehead against hers. "Yeah, it was."
From that moment on, things between them only grew stronger. They spent more time together, their connection deepening in ways that surprised even them. They found comfort in each other's presence, joy in the little things, and love in every shared glance, touch, and word.
Vinnie had never been more sure of anything in his life. Y/N was his person, and he was hers. And as they lay there, tangled up in each other, he couldn't help but think that this—this love, this connection—was exactly what he had been searching for all along.
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howdoyousleep3 · 11 months ago
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Rating: Explicit (E) Word Count: 4.7K Notable Tags: Dom/Sub AU, Heavy Power Imbalance, Non-Con (from characters other than Steve and in the past, no major detail), Daddy Kink, Age Difference, Sex Trafficking, Human Trafficking, Submissive Auction, Angst With a Happy Ending, Depressive Thoughts, Depressed Bucky Barnes, Slight Stockholm Syndrome, Crying, Subspace, Blowjob, Face Fucking, Orgasm Denial, Cock Cage, Size Kink, Size Difference A/N: This was originally supposed to be published in the last Kinktober I participated in under my Age Difference day. I've only read one story that was in the Dom/Sub AU and I was so taken with it, it's all I thought about as I wrote this. It's a universe where, kind of like Omegaverse, everyone has a designation of Dominant or Submissive. I didn't dive into it too heavily, but I left it totally up for my interpretation so...don't mind me lol. Compared to what I usually write, this one is kind of twisted and dark. Please read the tags and don't continue reading if it makes you uncomfy. ❤️
Read here on Ao3.
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The lights in this room are much more dim than the ones in the showcase room they’ve just performed in. He feels the line of his shoulders relax at the sight, be it merely a smidgen, heart still hammering against his rib cage. His limbs continue to tremble unpleasantly, his head pounding, his hole wet and aching to the point of pain. 
He is used to this happening when he’s used without completion, climax other than his own being robbed from him, when he isn’t used for his purpose. He does as they’ve trained him though— he ignores his tender emotions and his body’s biological signs of unfulfilled submission. 
Bucky barely has half the mind to take in his surroundings, to lift his chin and glance around the room he’s quickly being shuffled into. It almost looks like a study, someone’s personal office or library. It’s deceivingly cozy with its maroon walls and moody lighting, a fireplace lit and in use on one end of the room, bookshelves lining the opposite wall. He’s slow to take in the bed in the center of the room, one that seems entirely out of place yet perfect in this setting, large and cloud-like and luxurious. 
The exhaustive ache that Bucky feels deep down to the center of his being yearns to curl up in the center of that bed like a kitten, to not be roused for hours on end. Instead he’s ordered to his knees on the rug next to it, the command settling unpleasantly on the nape of his neck like they always do. 
He looks down at himself, his nude and flushed form, eyes locking onto his hands bound and curled together in his lap, and he wonders how this is where he ended up in life. 
“Listen to me,” the handler tells him, voice unharsh yet still grating, the command one he’s forced to listen to. Bucky’s never enjoyed his designation, has rarely ever been comfortable being a Sub, but these moments are the ones he hates the most. He despises not having a choice, has a special kind of hatred for being commanded against his will, his body listening before his mind can fight against it. But he’s quick to respond, quick to mumble, “Yes, Sir,” because that’s what they’ve spent the last three months training Bucky to do. 
“You no longer belong to us,” the Dominant handler states without emotion, and even given the circumstances, relief kicks up into Bucky’s chest. “Your personal possessions are in this bag, your Dom will handle everything else once your bond is initiated. If it is initiated.” Bucky flinches. “You understand the reputation we hold here and the standards we’ve instilled in you, yes?” 
Bucky bites out another, “Yes, Sir,” before the handler is done moving purposefully around the room, coming to stand in front of Bucky. He doesn’t raise his head, just as he’s been taught.
“Good. I advise you to keep those in mind once you leave this place. You haven’t been the easiest Sub to deal with, James. I’d hate for your Dom to send you back here because you did not meet expectations. He won you fair and square with the highest bid; don’t make him regret that.” 
The severity of the situation Bucky’s been put in, the past few months, hits him in the solar plexus when he hears these words. He isn’t sure why his brain decides to catch up in this moment, why he decides to feel the weight of the past weeks here at the feet of his handler in the very last moment they’ll see each other, but he feels his chest constrict painfully. His hole aches in waves, mouth watering in preparation for what it thinks is coming, desperate, and Bucky bites back his whimper when he feels his dick wish to fill out. 
He never gets what he wants, what he needs, is always left feeling unfulfilled and purposeless. They’ve had to increase his dosage of meds they give him each day as a result of how affected he has become from touch after touch leaving him emptier and emptier. A Sub shouldn’t live like this yet here he is, having been picked up off the streets and trained to be the best of the best on such evil touches. 
He’s going to be so fucked up because of this place. 
Having been put on display in every possible way in the performance room during his shining moment, he wonders if this is the last time he’ll feel so used and hollow. Will his new Dom continue to leave him feeling so empty? Will he make Bucky do things he doesn’t want to do, use him against his will, take advantage of him and his designation? He feels so low in this moment he can’t see anything but that happening, of being owned and living this life of misery. Surely Bucky won’t survive. 
His handler doesn’t even say goodbye, doesn’t acknowledge Bucky as he leaves, and Bucky hates how much that hurts. He’s once again betrayed by his biological needs, betrayed by the intrinsic need to please and to obey, and even given the piss poor treatment they’ve put him through here, Bucky wishes his handler would leave him with more positive words, with the praise he so desperately craves. 
When he hears the door close behind the Dom, he can’t help the whimper that bubbles up and out of his mouth. 
His eyes don’t leave the floor because no one has told him he can raise his head, and even though he no longer belongs to this establishment, he can’t will his inner submissive to look up. Instead, his eyes lock onto the cage around his dick. He despises this thing. Before he was lured in with promises of a warm meal and an even warmer bed he had only heard of cock cages being utilized in either the most severe of relationships or for fun, no in between. He had never worn one until his training. 
He hates it, has tried taking it off on his own multiple times before his harshest of training had set in. He hasn’t come once during his time here, can barely remember what his own climax feels like. 
“Your pleasure no longer belongs to you, James. Your orgasms are not your own; they belong to your Dom.”
It’s ironic yet devastating to Bucky that all of this training, all of this pain, was pointless. Bucky could be a good Sub for someone, he knows it. He could give the right someone all of the things his training had brought out without the misery he’s gone through for these people. He could give his mind, body, and soul easily over to the right person. This line of thinking shifts into the only thing that brought him comfort each night; the only thing that helped him get the little sleep that he did— 
His Daddy. 
Well, hopefully his Daddy. 
If he’s the perfect man for Bucky, he’ll be his Daddy. 
And his knight in shining armor, this perfect Dom, his Daddy, would come one day to take him away from this hell. That’s what he dreamt about each night, that his Dom, strong enough for the both of them, big enough to easily cradle Bucky’s not entirely petite form close to his chest, would whisk him away from this place and give him everything he could ever need. His Dom that can teach him how to cook his favorite meals for him, his Dom that is patient, his Dom that is proud of Bucky. Every night when he needed comfort to sleep, this man would be the comfort Bucky needed to finally rest. 
Bucky wonders what his Dom is going to be like, what he’s going to look like, but most of all Bucky wonders if he is going to like Bucky. Surely he is attracted to Bucky if he got into a bidding war with someone else for Bucky, if he paid damn near a million dollars for Bucky’s bond, for his life. There is a sliver of hope that the highest bidder’s intentions are pure.
Bucky is so exhausted, right down to the bone, that he doesn’t even startle when he hears the door to the room open once more. He doesn’t lift his head, as he’s been taught, but this time he does it because of the onslaught of nerves that wrack his body. This is it, this is his new Dom, the one he’ll have for life, the one whose bond will be initiated tonight. With one last unmated deep breath, Bucky sends a wish out into the universe for his Dom to be kind, for him to show Bucky the love he’s never been given in life, to love Bucky. 
The sound of steady footsteps reach his ears at almost the same moment a sense of calm washes over Bucky’s being. It hits him in waves, drips down his spine like warm honey, a sensation so pleasurable his chest shakes with his caged sob. His nostrils fill with the scents of cinnamon and vanilla and a bonfire deep in the forest. His eyes well up with tears as he continues to look down at his hands, mind racing in disbelief at his body’s immediate reaction to his new Dom, a reaction he’s not experienced before.
Hope begins to seep into Bucky’s limbs as a pair of sleek, black boots come into view.
“James?”
Oh. 
He doesn’t realize he’s holding his breath until his next exhale comes out as a choked sob. Upon hearing that voice the hope in his body bursts, shatters, into something more fierce, something that has him responding with a quiet and thoughtless— 
“Daddy?” 
He doesn’t look up, doesn’t let his eyes leave the floor, those expensive boots. He feels his hands tremble in his lap, can almost hear them do so. He isn’t given enough time to panic about addressing his new Dom by a title that wasn’t approved by him, wasn’t given permission to use, because his Dom is responding confidently. 
“Look at me, please.”
Bucky’s eyelids flutter upon hearing the gentle command in such a soothing, rich voice, and he takes a deep and shaky breath before listening like a good boy…
And immediately begins sobbing in full.
It’s the faceless man from Bucky’s dreams, he’s sure of it. He has kind ocean eyes, an otherworldly physical presence. There’s experience etched into every part of his being, from his graying hair to the wrinkles around his eyes to the calmness that sweeps off of him in waves. He smiles down at Bucky and it makes him feel like he’s the most precious creature on the planet. 
“Oh, my angel…”
This is the man that is going to save his life.
This is his Daddy. 
With his eyesight now blurry because of his tears, he doesn’t see the hand coming down before it cups his chin. There’s a strength in this grip that Bucky knows will soothe him, hold him, love him for the rest of his life. A thumb swipes at his tears, wiping them from his cheek. He can’t remember the last time he felt such comfort from another human being. Even before he was forced into this facility, through all his sexual encounters, gentleness and softness were not things he experienced. He’s almost forgotten what it’s like, to feel a reassuring touch. 
“James,” his Daddy reverently murmurs, stroking his thumb over Bucky’s trembling bottom lip. “Why are you crying, sweetheart?” 
He swallows thickly, his eyes roving over his Daddy’s face, taking a few seconds to selfishly drink the older man in. His body reacts to its Dom’s presence like it knows its Daddy is finally here, its biological needs taking over all other needs, roaring to life within him. Bucky’s eyes fight to cross when he takes in the size of his Dom’s denim-clad thighs, how he fills out his cozy sweater. His Daddy’s so big. He wiggles his hips where he sits, chin in his Daddy’s big hand. 
“I’ve just…I’ve…I’ve been waiting for you for so long,” is what Bucky ends up saying quietly, sniffling, and his Dom’s smile is slow and sweet, like he enjoys Bucky’s answer. 
“I’ve been waiting for you forever, James.” 
Those words feel like pure sunlight.
But Bucky shakes his head without thought, stops himself abruptly after two shakes. He’s reminded then of his handler’s words, that he was a difficult Sub. He can’t take the risk of being anything but the best Sub. He’s already afraid to lose his Daddy; he has to be good. 
But his Dom has caught his defiance. 
“What is it, James?” 
“Nothing, Sir.” 
His Dom doesn’t miss a beat. 
“No, sweetheart— no lies, no holding back, no unspoken feelings. I always want to know what you are thinking, what your feelings are. So tell me, James. What is it?” 
Christ. Bucky can’t help but sniffle again, unable to get his tears under control. His Dom is perfect. 
“B-Bucky,” he mumbles. “I go by Bucky. I don’t…I don’t like James.” 
His Dom’s smile is warm, his fingers that squeeze around Bucky’s chin reassuring. He repeats Bucky’s name, practicing it a few times, each one sending Bucky melting further into his head and surely into the floor. 
“Of course, sweetheart— Bucky. My name is Steve,” he tells him, and Bucky’s insides warm with more of that sunlight Steve is bringing into his life. 
Steve. 
A strong name for a strong man, a name that belongs to a man that gently commands attention. It’s the perfect name, or so Bucky thinks.
“But you can call me Daddy, Bucky.’
That’s the best name, the perfect name. 
Hands still tied together in his lap, dick still in its cage, Bucky turns his head and nuzzles his cheek into his new Daddy’s palm, the warmth and sheer size of it making him lightheaded. It takes him a moment to recognize that this is the beginnings of him going under, of finding that sweet space within. He’d gotten so used to being forced there, his designation being used against him to put him under, that he’d almost forgotten what it was like to be sent there willingly. 
His whimpers seem endless even to his own ears. 
“Look at that,” Steve marvels from his place above Bucky, voice the most soothing of tones, a sensation in and of itself. He allows Bucky to nuzzle his cheek further into his palm, even as Bucky gives into the urge and desire to press kisses to his fingers. Such a forgiving Dom.
“I knew it the moment I laid eyes on you, that you’d be everything I’ve dreamt of having all to myself.”
Bucky sobs. The emotions that one sentence brings him is enough to beg Steve to not go any further. But Bucky is selfish, he is admittedly greedy. He’s been given nothing while being here, before this. He has continuously poured from a deserted and infinitely empty cup and has been given nothing when his heart, his mind, his body demands it, needs it, in order to survive. 
“Your tears,” Steve murmurs, interjecting his own shared line of thinking. “Are they good or bad, Bucky? Please tell me.” 
A request yet a command. A tender one. One Bucky must answer, is finally willing to answer. “Both,” is what he decides to admit. 
“Both?” 
He nods his head within Steve’s grip. “Yes, Daddy. Bad because…because I am sad for my past self. That I was never given a chance to be good and then said chance was forcefully taken away from me.” Before Steve can speak to those words, Bucky quickly continues. “But good because you’re here…you’re finally here. And I…I get to be so g-good for you.” 
Steve’s exhale is heavy, laced with a sound of pleasure that settles over Bucky’s own shoulders and neck. Bucky’s dick strains against its cage, his mind slipping from himself further. 
Steve sticks his thick thumb between Bucky’s lips and Bucky nearly sobs again, hiccuping around where he purses his mouth.
“You are extraordinary,” Steve tells him and Bucky truly believes it given his reverent tone. “The moment you stepped on stage, I knew it. I’ve been coming here for years. Did they tell you that? Years, Bucky.  I’m their hardest client to please, the one they couldn’t wait to be rid of. Money is of no importance, my preferences vague. Kept telling them I’d know when to bid, when the right Sub would be coming home with me.”  
Bucky sucks on Steve’s thumb harder, grateful to have something in his mouth as his Dom showers him with praise. 
“They even told me they’d go out of their way to find someone that fit what I was looking for, that we could forgo an auction altogether. I told them no.”
His Daddy is so powerful. 
Bucky slips further into his head. 
“Never once did I question myself; I knew you were out there. And when you stepped onto that stage with those legs and that mouth and those eyes…oh, kitten— you were made for me.” 
Bucky sways forward, head dizzy with need and relief curling together, tightly wound. Steve wraps his other fingers around Bucky’s chin, holding him steady. 
“And you’re going to be the sweetest, most affectionate boy for me, aren’t you? This is everything we’ve both been waiting for, isn’t it?”
Bucky nods his head frantically, laps at Steve’s thumb and sucks it into the back of his mouth. 
“You’re going to bring us so much joy through your submission, aren’t you? You’re going to bring us the purpose we’ve been craving. Together.” 
Bucky doesn’t know how to communicate that his feelings are terribly overwhelming, that he doesn’t know what to do with himself because of it. The force of his emotions leave his body trembling where he kneels. If Steve’s thumb weren’t in his mouth his teeth would surely be clacking against one another with the force of his tremors. His head spins in less of the dizzy way he’s been experiencing these past weeks and more in a euphoric way he’s always dreamt it could. 
His body already trusts its Daddy, leaning towards him and into his touch, loosening up further and further. The line in his shoulders softens, the tension in his thighs diminishes. Even with Steve’s thumb in his mouth, the tightness no longer residing in his jaw is obvious. 
Even as Bucky spent his nights dreaming of this moment, weeping for this moment, he never imagined it could be this perfect. 
But then Steve is reaching for his belt buckle with his other hand, the button on his black dress pants, and Bucky wonders if he is in fact dreaming. 
“Let Daddy give you something else to suck on, sugar. You look like you need it,” Steve purrs, reaching into his now open dress pants and pulling out his cock. Weeping nearly as much as Bucky has been, Steve’s cock is impossibly thick and deliciously heavy. It has Bucky’s hips wiggling once more, his vision going blurry as he’s presented with his Daddy’s cock for the very first time. He can’t stop the onslaught of sniffles and weepy eyes as he reminds himself once more that he’s so goddamn lucky Steve waited for him. 
He opens his mouth as soon as that cock is above him, letting Steve’s thumb pop from between his lips, whining as he does so. He can smell Steve from here, his warm scent with an added muskiness to it that has Bucky unabashedly groaning, tongue out. 
And then Steve pulls his balls out too, and Bucky nearly asks to be pinched. 
“Daddy…” 
“Gimme a kiss, sweetheart. Let Daddy feel that precious mouth.”
The moment the fat head of Steve’s cock lands on his tongue, Bucky feels the closest thing to submissive bliss he’s ever felt. It’s euphoric. The taste of him, this Dom, his Daddy, blooms on his tongue, bursts through his being. The taste of his excitement, his precome, forces another ragged noise from Bucky as he sucks Steve further into his mouth, savoring every inch of him. Steve’s thunderous and drawn out groan feels like a climax to Bucky.
“Oh, sweetheart,” Steve exclaims through an exhale, Bucky barely tethered to the earth. “That’s it. Show Daddy how much you’ve missed him, show him how perfect you are.”
In the three months he’s been here, servicing a Dom has not once felt like this. In his time before this, his time on the streets and beyond, he’s never felt solid within his submissiveness. The stretch of his jaw, the hot slide of velvet wrapped steel on his tongue and down his throat, the feel of Steve’s large fingers sliding through his hair; it all brings him a sense of purpose he’s failed to receive all these years. 
And he can’t help but sob around his mouthful. 
“I knew it, I…fuck, I knew you were made for me, Bucky” Steve tells him, voice full of awe and dripping with lust. “I can’t wait to see how far you drop, how far I can push you. You’re gonna let Daddy push you, aren’t you? You’re gonna let him learn all about you?” 
Bucky confirms Steve’s suspicions with another loud, garbled noise around his cock, one of obvious enthusiasm. He’s dropping hard now, wants to tell his Daddy he’s barely holding on, but then Steve’s hands are moving, holding Bucky’s head in place as he pulls his hips back. 
Using Bucky. 
What little headspace Bucky has left reserved for himself is used to marvel at how easily, how purposefully, it was for Steve to step into this role as his Daddy. 
He’d give Steve the world. 
He’ll give Steve whatever he wants, whenever he wants it, all the time. 
This is his life’s purpose now, being used for his Daddy’s pleasure, serving his Daddy. Being owned by his Daddy.
He’s left with no choice but to cry. 
Bucky opens up his throat as his eyes begin to close, leaning forward on his knees, letting Steve fuck his mouth. With an easy and sharp noise, Bucky immediately knows that Steve wants his eyes open and on him. He does just that, looking up at Steve as he sticks his tongue out obediently, moaning at the fullness of his mouth. 
“That’s it, that’s a good boy,” Steve murmurs, voice melting down Bucky’s spine as Steve’s fingers dig into his hair. “You’re so good, you’re already so good for your Daddy. Look at you, look how much you love sucking on your Daddy’s cock. You perfect baby Sub.”
Bucky’s head grows fuzzier, his dick aching, his core aching. He slurps around Steve’s cock but it does nothing to slow the trail of spit dripping down his chin and sliding towards his neck. Steve is a dream, an absolute dream. Bucky needs a communicator, needs someone who will listen and who will talk to him, especially when it’s filthy. Bucky wants to be talked dirty to, wants to experience that side of sex, especially when it’s praise. Especially when it’s from Steve. 
Without warning, Steve kicks his hips forward, a noise akin to a growl falling from his lips, his fingers tightening in Bucky’s hair. It’s a slip of his obvious control, his inner Dom breaking through, impatient. Bucky meets him full force with his own submission, moaning around his Daddy’s cock, showing him he can take it. 
“Yeah, you know what that is, don’t you? Your Sub knows a Dom when he feels one, doesn’t he?” 
Bucky’s whine is damn near desperate. 
“You know how hard it is for your Dom not to take you right here on this fucking floor, sweetheart? Makes me feel feral, the way I want to make you mine. Mhmm, your Daddy doesn’t want that though. Your Daddy wants to take you home, take you away from this place forever. He wants to treat you right.” 
Bucky swallows around his mouthful.
He can feel Steve’s groan all the way down here, down in his toes.
“Here’s what we’re going to do, sweetheart,” Steve tells him, his hands holding onto both sides of his face. He pulls his cock out of Bucky’s mouth just enough to where Bucky can only suckle on the tip of it given the restraint Steve has put him in. The connection of their eyes, the way Steve looks down at him, strikes a chord deep, deep within Bucky. 
He whimpers as he suckles on the big, swollen head of his Daddy’s cock as he listens. 
“I’m going to give you what you want. I’m going to give you my come, fill your pretty belly with it. I have a hunch that’s going to send you right under, which is perfect. You’re so perfect, angel.”
Bucky whimpers again. 
“And then Daddy’s going to take you home. And when we get home, I’m going to give you a bath and play with your little body until you’re nice and loose and ready to take my big cock.” 
Bucky whimpers again. 
“And then I’m going to fuck your little hole until it sends you right back under, until you come all over my cock, until our bond snaps into place and we finally and officially belong to one another.” 
Oh. 
Bucky sniffles as he lets Steve use his mouth, tears trailing down his cheeks and mixing with the spit smeared on his chin. He wasn’t sure if the person who bought him would want to bond so quickly, if they’d want to bond at all. It’s been implied to him since he got here that he was too difficult of a Sub to become bonded. To hear that Steve wants to take him away from this dreadful place, to their home, in order to bond with him is a dream come true. 
It’s what begins to send him under. 
“That’s it, kitten,” Steve pants, fucking himself impossibly deep into Bucky’s mouth. “That’s it, baby. Oh, I can almost feel you slipping from me. Have you stolen my heart already? Have you tempted my bond already, Bucky?” 
Bucky’s vision begins to grow fuzzy around the edges, his mind pulling in on itself, hypnotized by the drag of Steve’s cock in and out of his mouth. In and out, in and out, in and out. Blessedly not rough, but intense and all-consuming. His jaw nearly aches at the stretch of Steve’s girth and it’s— 
It’s bliss. 
Daddy’s hands in his hair, Daddy’s cock in his mouth, Daddy’s praise in his ear, Daddy’s eyes on his face, Daddy’s come on his tongue. 
“Daddy.” 
“You’re mine now, Bucky. No one is ever going to hurt you, never again. I’ll give you everything you could ever want as a Sub and as a boy. You’ll never wish for anything now that I’m your Daddy,” Steve tells him as he shoots off down Bucky’s throat, hands in Bucky’s hair, petting him as he pumps his hips.
His Daddy’s voice is steady and strong, full of promise and love. And as he kneels there at his Daddy’s feet with Steve’s warm come settling into his belly, his Daddy’s cock still in his slack mouth, Bucky finally, finally lets himself sink.
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IVORY GRANITE
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Disclaimer: I do not own Maliksi, or Makisig (the Tamawo bros). Full Credit goes to HC - @ask-emilz-de-philz. Please check out their blog for amazing art and the wonderful world of Planet Puto.. All involved characters are adults. This might or might not be a self insert, please don't come for me. TW: Suggestive, Slight NSFW
Unlike the other binibinis that arrived, Maliksi tolerated your presence. Not that he sees you as someone special amongst the women who are there to be a potential surrogate for their kind, but rather your calm and composed attitude is refreshing to see. You did not mindlessly fawn over his brother, Makisig or any other Tamawo like a half-wit human who's a slave to their worldly desires. You just kept patient and let Makisig tend to the other ladies first- you are not in a rush afterall since time flows differently in Biringan City. You spent your first week roaming around, exploring, relaxing, and to Maliksi's amuzement- just enjoying being there. "Hey, not gonna throw a tantrum like the other gal earlier? My Kuya's comforting his... 5th binibini for today." Maliksi asked nonchalantly, a lollipop stuffed in his cheek as he plays video games in the living room, sulking since his older brother is too busy giving attention to the ladies instead of spending time with him. "Nope, I've been fully informed of everyone's set up here, thanks for asking though." You softly chuckled before taking note of how bored and irritated Maliksi looks. "Need a player 2?" He reluctantly throws one controller at you, which you were able to catch. "Tch. Make sure you don't suck or I'm taking that back." That single interaction was the start of an unlikely acquaintanceship between the two. Maliksi never liked humans, but this one- this small, soft, and friendly human is kinda tolerable to be around with, not that he will admit it. You were always easy to talk to, you were always soft and kind to him, despite him being not so friendly most of the time. You were able to sense if he's been having an extra difficult day, not getting angry when he's too snarky and sharp with his words. Of course those words don't just go unnoticed, it's still annoying to be honest. That is why he stopped dead in his tracks, eyes wide open the first time he heard you talk back to his sarcasm and rude remarks. "Say that again." Maliksi gritted his teeth. He was having a bad day after some binibini started acting up that his Kuya Makisig needed to cancel their video game night for the third time this week. He knows he's being rude to you but he's too prideful to take it back. "I said, you're a jerk for being all snarky and mean to me when I didn't do anything wrong to you!" You slightly raise your voice, brows furrowed in annoyance. You could've stopped there, but you were just mad at how unfair he is, using you as someone he can just talk down to whenever he's having a bad day. "This is why the other ladies mess with you purposely every chance they get! Your Kuya must've been tired of hearing them rant about your trashy attitude all day long. Maybe I should-" "Should what? Do the same as the others? Act like a goddamn brat?" Maliksi scoffed. "My Kuya doesn't do anything about brats...but I do." Maliksi coldly said, looking at you dead in the eye.
"Do what? Think I'm scared of you, Maliksi? I think you're all bark and no bite! Just a little spoiled brother waiting for his kuya to give him love and attention -" Before you knew it, Maliksi was already dragging you into his own room, bending you over his lap before lifting the hem of your dress up, slapping one of his hands on your behind, staining your skin red with his handprint. 
"Count." Maliksi said in a cold tone.You let out a soft yelp as his palms made contact with your backside once again.
"M- Maliksi." You softly whined, biting your lips from the slight pain. "Oh, not too happy to be disciplined, huh? I said f*cking count, brat!" he said as he gave you another slap. "Three.." You softly said, tears slowly forming in your eyes and you're not sure if it's from the sting from where his palms made contact on your behind, or from the humiliation of being disciplined like this. "I can't hear you, missy." "Four.." "Five.." He didn't stop until you were sobbing, saying your apologies for yelling at him in between sniffles.
"How many was that, Y/n?" He softly said, his tone gentle as he rubs his hand soothingly on your red stained skin. "T..Ten."
"That's right. Have you learned your lesson? You're not gonna give me attitude now, yes?" You slowly nodded.. "That's my y/n. Now be a good girl and let my fingers and tongue apologize for being rude to you earlier." 
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ateez-himari · 5 months ago
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[240901] MAKNAES REUNITE
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[NEW MESSAGES FROMM HIMARI]
[PM 10:49] The maknaes are maknae-ing harder than any maknae has ever maknae-d before
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[PM 10:50] ㅎㅎ I might possibly be on social media more than you guys think, but the caption was both of our ideas to be fair. It's maknae telepathy
[PM 10:50] No we rode on the same one (please help me), I have a racing circuit license, a driver's license but I don't have a motorcycle license yet. We've been really busy lately so I'll get it when I have time
[PM 10:51] Ah, we're ahead of you! Jungkook oppa already posted the ta ta ta challenge on his account, we knew you guys would want us to do it ㅎㅎㅎ I can't believe he's starting trends while doing his service...
[PM 10:52] Oh, Tiny! It's his birthday today, he turned 27...he's getting very close to being 30 already yet he acts the same age as me. It's a shared braincell between maknaes I think
[PM 10:52] It's hard to keep track of but it's been about 11 years now, maybe a little more since we met before their debut. Since I'm still 22 I've known him half of my life
[PM 10:52] I didn't know he used one of his rest days, he just called me in the morning after my boyfriend left for the studio and asked if I was busy. It was fun, we went to eat barbeque after the bike ride
[PM 10:53] Oh I remember that, people were speculating for so long ㅎㅎI solved the mystery now, as you can see the extra helmet in his house was mine. I think the other members use it sometimes too so it's shared property
[PM 10:53] Some protective gear he bought for me is there too, I think some army were talking about it after a live and I felt kind of bad because they thought it was a girlfriend...
[PM 10:54] Jimin oppa told you that we cried when he started his service ? Wow, what a tattler, but it's true. I guess it was just really strange, I mean we grew up together in a sense so leaving each other for so long was heavy
[PM 10:54] Ahh no you can't talk to him, we said goodbye about two hours ago so I'm back home now. Mingi asked if I wanted to do a live later so you might talk to us!
[PM 10:54] If you guys are lucky he'll turn on the camera this time ㅎㅎ I really want to give you a tour of the airbnb at some point too, since it's a hanok (a traditional house) it looks really nice, like we're back in time almost
[PM 10:55] Hyunjin oppa already posted the pictures ? It's true, we went to see Stray Kids yesterday and it was such an amazing concert ! We met a few staytinys there, then had dinner with some of the members
[PM 10:55] No, I've actually known Bangchan oppa longer since we spent some time together before I left for KQ. We slept in the same room for a bit since neither of us were in the lineup for any group so there was no set dorm
[PM 10:56] How can you do this to me ?! There's no way I can pick a favorite solo, I really hope that they release them soon though...I'll put in a good word to JYP for you guys ;p
[PM 10:57] Don't worry I have plans with other members later on! But first we're going to go see my family in a few days, mom's been very adamant on 'setting my boyfriend straight just in case' ㅎㅎ I missed them a lot
[PM 10:57] Haneul's been asking me to come non-stop every time my brother calls to check up on me so I'm sure she'll be happy too. The members and I got so many gifts while we were on tour, Seonghwa oppa even got her some baby Lego
[PM 10:57] Oh, no, not Sannie oppa's older sister ! Haneul is my niece, Hanzo nii-chan's daughter, my brother wanted to continue the legacy of 'H' names to honor our parents
[PM 10:58] Ahh Mingi's out of the shower so I have to go now, we're gonna go on a walk (really romantic right ??) ♡ Love you so much, kisses!
Translated from Korean by Google
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