#not to say nothing is happening buts its just kind of. okay cool

[dapperrokyuu]

On the topic of Mochijun, Im sorry to say, but the pace of Vanitas no Carte is just so killed for me right now, I cant really feel anything about it for more than a moment, catch me when chapters are normal length or something spectacular happens and its impact can be properly conveyed through 16 pages- 😔✌️

[aswallowssong]

Sicktember #3: Campus Crud

The HOO AU College AU is back at it again folks, ft. everyone's favorite Boy Toys. @starstwinkleplanetsshine let's name this AU lol

This is so stupid.

“This is so stupid!”

“You’re going to make your throat worse, stop it,” Cadence scolded, giving one Leo Valdez a look that said, if you don’t cut it out, I might kill you.

“But–”

“No, no buts, Leo. Seriously, can’t you just rest? Look at Jason and Percy? Are either one of them making me want to rip my hair out?”

In Leo’s defense, Jason and Percy had gone down before he had, and were in a pile of limbs on the floor, both listlessly watching what Cadence thought was a rerun of RuPaul’s Drag Race. As she looked, she realized that at one point she’d given both boys a damp washcloth for the fevers they were running, but now Jason didn’t have one, and Percy had two.

“Percy–”

“I already know what you’re gonna say, Cades, and he gave it to me. I didn’t steal it.”

She frowned. “I wasn’t–”

“You were. Shh, Ru is talking.”

Cadence rolled her eyes, turning back to Leo. Leo was looking at her like he’d been betrayed.

“Okay, one of them is making me want to rip my hair out.”

“Mhm.”

“Please lay down and stop talking.”

Leo looked like he wanted to revolt, but he played nice, laying back down on the couch and snuggling under the ugly orange blanket he loved so much.

Cadence took a breath. Most of their friends had been down with what Ros, a friend of theirs that was a Sophomore, called “Campus Crud.” Leo’s half-brother, Evan, had already had it, and so had she, so they’d said that it was basically inevitable.

Cadence would have preferred to call it “The Most Annoying Thing To Happen This Semester.” And that was saying a lot, considering they’d seemed to miss it first semester. They weren’t as lucky now, in mid-January, when everyone was bringing germs back from home, or holiday, or wherever they might have been for New Year’s.

She wished Angie was there. It would have been nice to have another set of hands, but it hadn’t taken too long to figure out that as soon as someone was sick, she might as well have been in the wind. Cadence didn’t understand it at all, but then again, her dad was a doctor, her two older brothers were in medical school, and she’d already been accepted into the nursing program, as soon as her Gen Eds were out of the way. For her, illness was a natural part of life.

A natural part of life that was currently driving her insane.

“Hey, Cady?”

She had no idea when the Jackson twins, Jason, and Leo had started calling her that, but it was still weird to hear it from someone that wasn’t at least partly related to her.

“Yeah, Perce?”

“I’m cold.”

“No,” she said simply, “you’re not. Your body is too warm, so it feels more cold around you.”

There was a pause, and she peered over the couch to see him looking at her with an absolutely pathetic pout. “But I’m cold.”

She closed her eyes for a second, knowing that if they were open, there’d be nothing to stop her from rolling them.

He’s sick. Be kind.

“I know,” she said, almost surprised by how calm her voice was. How even. “But I don’t think it’s a good idea to give you another blanket if we want your body temperature to cool down.”

“What happened to ‘sweat it out?’ I feel like my dad used to say that.”

“People did used to say that,” Cadence said simply, losing the fight, and rolling her eyes. “But it’s a myth.”

“I like myths.”

“Me too,” Jason croaked. He’d been hit first, and was still very much in the deep end of the nasty cold making its rounds.

“I like myths,” Leo agreed, poking out from his bright orange cocoon. “Especially if they let me be warm.”

“No one is feeling warm,” Cadence said, taking a deep breath to even herself back out. “You can’t sweat out the cold virus that’s making you sick. That’s not how it works. The fever is an effect of your immune system working properly to fight the virus. You’re going to feel cold. You’ll start feeling better when your white blood cells win and your fever breaks.”

“What about the fact that all my muscles feel like they’re made of pain?” Percy said, Jason and Leo humming in agreement, and Cadence pinched at her nose bridge.

“Haven’t any of you been sick before? Actually, don’t answer that. I’ve literally done this with all three of you already this year. Why are we even having this conversation?”

“Well, when Jason was really sick, he was basically incoherent,” Leo pointed out. Jason tried to throw a water bottle at him, but it missed wide.

“Good one, Jay,” she said dryly, and Percy gave a congested chuckle.

“Well, Percy showed up at their doorstep and threw up on Cady’s shoes,” Jason said, and Percy reached out and slapped his arm, betrayal on his face. 

“Hey!”

“Boys–”

“At least I didn’t give myself food poisoning!”

“Ay! The caf gave me food poisoning, sonso, don’t put that on me!”

“Boys!” Cadence yelled, and all three winced, Jason going as far as covering his ears a little. She knew all three of them had wicked headaches, and it was sort of a low blow to yell, but she didn’t need them riling each other up.

She lowered her voice again. “I was just trying to make a point that none of these things I’m saying should be surprising to you three. You’re going to be cold, and achy, and feel bad, because you’re sick. And I’m trying to make this as painless as possible, but I’m also trying to do what I think is best, based on everything I know. I’m also eighteen, and I’m very tired, so just…” she gestured to the screen of Leo’s computer, where they’d been streaming old shows, mostly legally. “Watch RuPaul.”

The boys were all staring at her with varying levels of embarrassment, directly based on how sick they were really feeling. Jason was mostly listless, while Leo looked truly embarrassed, and Percy at least had the gumption to look sheepish.

“Sorry Cady,” they chorused, and she rubbed her temples, exasperated, but she couldn’t stay mad for long. She loved the boys, even when they made her want to freak out.

She sighed. “I forgive you guys.” 

The three of them turned back to the screen, and just as RuPaul announced which queens would have to Lip-Sync for their Lives, her phone rang. The boys booed her, and she rolled her eyes, again, stepping into the hallway.

She let it vibrate another time, taking in the quiet of Leo and Percy’s dorm outside of their room. No boys whining. Noone coughing or sniffling. No RuPaul’s voice through Leo’s shitty speakers. Not, of course, that she had anything against RuPaul. She would have sat down to watch with them happily if she wasn’t about to rip her hair out.

When Cadence felt like she could breathe again, she answered Angie’s call.

“Hello?”

“Cady! How are– are you okay? You sound… defeated?”

Cadence sighed, slumping with her back against the wall. She tilted her head back so it could rest on the wall as well, and closed her eyes. 

“I’m… trying not to be. It’s not usually all three of them, you know? And it’s easier to take care of my own siblings when they’re sick, because I’m their big sister.”

And I’m not doing it alone.

“You’re basically their big sister, aren’t you the oldest?”

“Yeah, which is insane. I’m not nineteen until February. You guys are babies.”

Cadence heard Angie shifting on the other line, presumably laying in her bed, watching something insane or listening to music as loud as it could go. “Whatever. Back to the defeat, if they’re being assholes, tell them that.”

“No,” Cadence said quickly, sliding down to sit, her knees tucked to her chest. “No, they’re not. They’re being whiney, sick, eighteen year old boys. I’ve got one of those back home, too, it’s not like they’re being unreasonable or anything. It’s just easier with one. Or two. Or if they weren’t trying to razz one another.”

“Do I need to come over there?” Angie was obviously trying to keep hesitance and worry out of her voice, but it didn’t quite sell the way she’d obviously wanted it to. 

Cadence couldn’t ask her to come over and be freaked out the entire time, especially when there was a strong chance she’d get sick, too. She was worried about herself at this point, and even though she had a pretty rock-solid system, it wouldn’t have surprised her if she ended up sick by the end of the week, what with the “Campus Crud,” or whatever, running rampant.

“No, that’s okay. Would you mind making a run to the store for me, though? There’s a gold amex in my wallet, you can use that.”

“There’s a gold amex in your wallet?!”

“Mhm,” Cadence said simply, now distracted by trying to think through what she needed Angie to get. “Make sure you have your license on you, because if I have you get cold medicine, they card for that.”

“I– okay but we’re talking about that at some point!”

“Sure,” Cadence said. “I’ll text you a list in a few minutes. None of them have had much of an appetite, but they need to eat something, so maybe I’ll have you grab some soup I can put in the microwave.”

“Microwave soup,” Angie said sagely. “Good for the Campus Crud.”

Cadence laughed, surprising herself. The whole thing was ridiculous. The boys, her position of caretaker, Angie’s fear of illness, and the fact that she was hiding in the hallway. But, as Angie said that, Cadence knew that was exactly what she wanted to do. She wanted to microwave soup, and give medicine, and damp cloths for fevers. 

She wanted to take care of her friends while they were sick, because she loved them, and that was showing them that love the best way she knew how. 

“Can you also maybe get me a sandwich or something? Cadence found herself saying, straightening and squaring her shoulders. “I’m starving.”

“Anything for our nurse. I’ll leave now.”

“Thanks, Angie.”

“Sure, Cady. Thank you. Love you.”

Cadence smiled, turning the knob of the door to let herself back into the fray. Ru told someone to sashay away, and all three boys erupted into raspy shouts, sniffles, and grumbles of protest.

“Love you too.”

[wanderrlust0]

sudden rant turned spiral lol oops

my friend got tickets to see hozier aka andrew their wife and basically got them for us since i said id be down to go. personally im not like a fan where id go see him but id say im a casual listener. like i knew a good amount of songs. i loveee cherry wine and others. now that we have this concert coming up on june 7, ive become a listener. i gotta prepare and all that yknow. cant go to andrew unprepared. also..idk how?! but i was not aware of his thick irish accent.. loll and i mean, even in his new album, he sings with a clear accent?? idk how i never noticed before honestly. so yeah, im curious to know what a hozier concert will be liikeeee. this will be my second concert this yr and they both involve me going bc a friend asked me to go for company lol. i am going to another in august w my bf to see porter robinson and thats actually one i will really enjoy!! itll also be our first like “edm” dance music type concert so itll be so cool. its at the same stadium that hozier will be at as welllll..but you see, what im procrastinating is telling my bf im going w my friend. my friend who hes not a fan of. the one who he thinks is a Threat! D: ive been knowing for likee 2 weeksish and havent said a single word about it agdjfkfl but i am calling it now.. i. will. tell. him. tomorrow. period. no ifs ands or buts. i need to stop worrying and just rip the bandaid off. once i do tho, im still gonna feel anxious bc literally The NEXt WEEk we will most likely go to my (ex)coworkers second party. (the one who threw a halloween party and i didnt know if wed go but we were already hanging out that day so i mentioned it prior and we ended up having enough time and the girls house was very close to me so we ended up dropping by and i told elias right then and there so it was very last minute and kind of fucked up of me but ive developed an avoidance thing towards him if it has to do with snow bc of everything and thats why now i cant help myself from feeling nervous to ever bring them up around him bc im scared he’ll revert back and not love me and start resenting me and leave me and be mean to me and make me feel lonely and accuse me of things and say its my fault i started the friendship in the first place and that im not committed to him and dont love him anymore and everything else under the sun bc hes got trust issues which is a pain and he’ll go from loving me so hard to not in a quick minute if he starts thinking the worst possibilities and i just cant handle all of that and tbh its nothing new so ive grown to understand the process and that itll pass but it really does suckk and it can turn into a turn off and then he becomes emotionally unavailable and then i become emotionally annoyed and then its a constant reoccurring cycle that doesnt always look the same but they follow the same theme which is trust and every time it happens i want to shout at his ex for causing him to develop this issue and this is me spiraling right now bc im nervous and to be crystal clear its not bc im doing anything shady at all or anything with this friend but i just wanna feel the freedom to just casually hang out with them without it feeling so taboo or whatever bc we still have so many plans that wed like to do and idk if he will ever be okay with me going to their house and idk when he’ll ever get better where he wont care how many times we hang out or how often we talk and i just want him to chill about them bc theyre not a bad person at all theyre not this homewrecker girlfriend stealer he makes it out to beeee were literally just existinggg were literally just two friends who enjoy each others company and existence and have become very open and genuine with fairly quickly and we somehow just connected and i truly do love them as a friend and im happy weve crossed paths and stayed in touch and its just something he cant and wont fully understand about us but hes been trying to at least a little but is mainly just dealing with it bc he knows he cant stop me and im not gonna stop my friendship bc hes telling me to so,

…continued…

[nautiscarader]

Nautiscarader's Wendip Week #5: baby sitting

(Ao3)

Wendy and Dipper blinked several times, staring absent-mindedly at their unexpected guest, trying to ponder his request. In the many years the two have spent adventuring together and with their friends they have received many odd requests of help, and even by their standards, this one was exceptional.

"You-you want us to babysit… the Time Baby?", Wendy pointed to the big-headed creature in Blendin's arms.

"Time Baby 2.0, technically", he corrected her, "We were going to name him 'Baby one more Time', but we thought it would be too cheeky, so we just stuck with enumeration."

Blendin tickled the new Time Baby's tummy and made a silly face as it cooed.

"We call him Two-two."

"Okay, hang on", Dipper pressed his hand against his face, "Like- how? Where did it come from? And if you are going to say 'when daddy times and mommy times love each other very much'…"

Blending groaned and rolled his eyes.

"Oh please", he scoffed, "I would never do that. Besides, those kind of jokes have been banned. Well, will be in around hundred years."

Wendy and Dipper stared at Blendin with exactly the same amount of understanding as before.

"But to get to the answer, er, well, uh, let's just say it's called a Big bang for a reason, and -"

"OKAY, ENOUGH", Wendy reached her hands, "Well take him for a couple of hours while you… ", she paused, "What was the reason you were stuck, again?", she raised her eyebrow.

"Leap-leap years", he explained, "We are experimenting with removing some years because people hated them so much, and that of course shifts the leap years and stuff. It all started with 2020s."

"Seems right".

"Yeah… So, all devices are turned off and I have nothing better to do. It's so cool being able to get some actual free time I can spend in proper, linear, non-convoluted fashion."

With a quick motion, Blendin removed his grey suit revealing a Hawaiian-style shirt underneath it. He waved the couple goodbye and headed towards the exit of the Shack, singing some song.

"Oh my gosh, clowns!", he shouted at the nearby fair poster, "I gotta see them in their natural habitat as opposed to zoos!"

"Wendy", Dipper asked, "Are you… sometimes worried what in the actual he…"

He looked at the second Time Baby

"…heck happens in the future?"

"I try not think about it. We can't do anything about it.", Wendy shrugged, but as she spoke her words, a sudden realisation hit her at the same time as Dipper. The two smiled, exchanged knowing looks, and stared at the big-headed baby in front of them.

"Or can we…?", they both spoke at the same time and grinned.

==========

"So, one more time.", Wendy addressed Time Baby, pointing to the toy figurines, "Pizza parties are…"

"Good!", Time Baby spoke.

"And nuclear wars are…?"

"Bad!", it grimaced, blowing raspberry.

"Yay! Very well, little dude!", she clapped and handed it a slice of pizza. "All problems solved forever."

===========

"…And thus, with the great dragon Slagg dead, there was finally peace in the Upper-Left-Corner-Earth. The End."

Dipper closed the massive book and smiled at the Time Baby.

"Ah, another classic done. Did you like it?"

"Blah.", the Time Baby replied.

"Well, yeah, but that's because we didn't get to the Appendix where we get all the backstories of all the families of every character. That's where the real fun begins!"

At the sound of that, the Time Baby opened its mouth and returned its previous meal, prompting Dipper to jump aside.

"Hm, that's usually people's reaction to the prequel's adaptations…", he pondered, as he reached for the mop.

======

"Okay, now we will do some numbers!", Wendy clapped, pulling some fridge magnets. "So, if I have five apples, and I eat two apples, then who is going to win next year's Superb Owl and what will be the final score? I gotta know the deets."

"Wendy!", Dipper butted in, "You can't do that! There is an entire movie franchise telling you looking up matches from the future is a bad idea!"

"Oh come on, dude", Wendy barked back, "I thought Stan has taught you better to use literal life hacks when opportunity arrives."

"Yeah, but we gotta think of consequences!"

"Yeah, like you have with cloning yourself. That turned out well."

"That was years ago! And what about you and the school? Oh, I'm sorry, 'toilet paper central'? How many times were you and your friends in trouble for that?"

Their bickering was suddenly interrupted by a loud sniffing, followed by an even louder cry, as the Time Baby exploded in tears. Wendy and Dipper at once turned towards him and took him in their arms.

"Ssh, ssh, little one…" Dipper tickled its tummy, while Wendy reached for a teddy bear. "We were just arguing, we didn't want to disturb you…"

"And we're over it.", Wendy smiled, fixing its onesie. "Because that's what friends do. They make up after fighting, so they don't make the same mistake twice."

"Fwiends…", the Baby cooed, and with Dipper and Wendy gently rocking it to sleep, it started snoring softly.

"I think we did it.", Dipper whispered and reached his hand to slowly meet with hers in an inaudible high-five.

It took another hour or so before Blendin came back, hoarding tons of cheap rewards from the carnival games he attended.

"Look at these vintage beauties!", he pointed to two inflatable swimming rings around his tummy. "They don't make them like they used to… Anyway, how was our little overlord?"

"Sweet as candy, no problem with him at all.", Wendy replied handing him the oversized bundle.

"And you guys didn't try to get him to tell you the future, or influence it in any shape or form?"

"What? Us?", Dipper chuckle nervously.

"No way, man!", Wendy chimed in, leaning on her slightly shorter's friend's shoulder.

"Hm. I hope you are telling the truth.", Blendin muttered, examining their would-be-casual faces.

At the same time, his hand-held device started beeping.

"Oh, finally, they fixed it!".

He clicked the button, opening the yellowish-green portal behind him. "Thanks again, guys. Now we;re even."

"Even?", Dipper and Wendy looked at each other, "What do you mean?"

"Very funny, guys", he corrected his glasses, "I still have stains after your twins barfed all over my favourite gray anti-radiation suit."

Dipper and Wendy looked at Blendin with mixture of anxiety and bewilderment as meaning of his words did not fully settle with them.

"Wha-what to you mean… "

"OUR twins?"

Blendin stared at the two and checked his device, which drained some colour off his face.

"Oh, flip, I'm four years too early. Darn you, Leap-leap years! This is why we're doing this!"

"F-Four?!", they both cried, looked at each other in utter horror at scooted to the sides as tensions grew in the air.

"Well, great, I will have to attend a spoilers hearing in the morning. It's all your fault, you all dress the same way regardless of time period. It's like dealing with cartoon characters. Anyway, say hello to your kids… uh, when they are born at least."

And with that, he and the waving Time Baby disappeared in the time vortex, leaving two twenty-something-year-olds even more confused as they were before.

"So, uh", Dipper broke the silence, "It's probably not the best time to tell you I got us two tickets for the fair, right?"

[jarofstyles]

SK8ER BOI II- Ollie

A/N: oooOOOO here we go! a little more development before the rollercoaster starts. The little angsty elements make it that much more exciting though. Enjoy! - n + d

send feedback and requests here

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masterlist

pairing: Harry Styles x Reader

warnings: drug use (weed), cheating, smut, ass play

word count: 10.5k

The next day at school, it wasn’t hard to find Y/N. She stood with her friends as Harry skated past, waving at her as he went by. His black sweater and jeans were practical and normal wear. 

“Since when were you friends with him?” One of her friends asked with raised brows. “He’s not the most social of them all.” 

It was true. Harry tended to keep to himself and minded his own business, stayed with his group of friends and didn’t bother anyone. He hooked up at parties to be people’s bad boy fantasies and all that but he wasn’t much of a talker in social situations. Not a lot was known about him besides he smoked weed, drank, hooked up and was generally a nice guy. You could label him a stoner skater and it wouldn’t be wrong.

It was really nice to see Harry, Y/N thought it was cute that he waved when he skated past. It did bring a smile to her face. “Oh, we’re assigned partners for Mr. Beck’s anatomy class.” Y/N explained, “he’s actually really nice. Easy to work with.” She nodded and noticed Timmy looking at her with furrowed brows. “I’m going over again on Friday to work on it.” She let him know, wrapping her arm around his waist from behind and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “You alright?” Of course Y/N just had to act as she would normally, she couldn’t let anyone know of her little secret. It wasn’t that hard keeping up with Timmy though, she did genuinely care about him and affection was her immediate way of interacting with him. Hugs, kisses, nothing had changed really. 

“Nothing, babe, was just curious.” Timothée smiled down at her and leaned down to peck her lips. Y/N rested her head on his shoulder and sighed, that spark really wasn’t there.

Even Harry noticed, there was no chemistry. Lighting up a cigarette, he leaned against the tree with Niall talking Zayn’s ear off, watching the couple. It looked like they were friendly but the guys’ arm stayed on her arm. The boy didn’t loop around her waist, didn’t hold her body closer— no. It was a very obvious thing to him now more than ever. 

“I’m positive he’s not into girls.” Harry said. “Nothing wrong with it but... Y/N’s hot. He’s literally not touching her at all.” He spoke lowly. His friends didn’t know he was hooking up with her and it was normal for him to have random outbursts like this so it was okay for him to say. 

“Ya think? He looks sickly whenever she kisses him.” Niall snickered. “It’s fine but, he shouldn’t string the poor girl along.” 

Harry agreed.

----

The rest of the week went by just fine but realistically Y/N was excited for Friday. Maybe it was bad of her to get all ready for him as if they were a thing, but she wanted to feel nice and look nice for him even if it was just someone she was hooking up with. Y/N had taken extra precautions, telling her mom she was working on a project with a friend but she might go to Timmy’s after to spend the night. Now. Y/N wasn’t sure how long she’d be staying, but just in case. She wanted to have as much time with Harry as she possibly could. So, she got dropped off at Harry’s around 5 after dinner, her heart beat picking up again. She had worn a set of underwear with little hearts on it, thinking it was cute. Y/N didn’t feel comfortable wearing overly sexy sets, they just weren’t her. Hopefully Harry would think they were cute. She wasn’t even sure if they were for real going to do stuff again, but she could only assume so.

He had kept an eye on Y/N and Timmy for the rest of the week and struggled to understand why Y/N was still with the dude. He didn’t pay her much attention. Sure, he would kiss her head or rub her arm but there was no physical affection. From what Harry has seen, Y/N thrived off of being touched. It must be really hard for her. He didn’t know why she went for that and stood for the treatment especially when she was barely getting anything out of the agreement. It confused the fuck out of him. Either way, he tried to stay out of it. the house was clean and Y/N was coming over and he had questions for her, so he would ask them later. He figured if it ran late enough he could order pizza and bring her home. Or whatever she was doing next. It was Friday. He was just planning on smoking and using his telescope.

Y/N texted him saying she was there and smiled up at him when he opened the door. Just as last time, the kitties came running over to greet her and she couldn’t help but smile, again dropping down to pet them all. 

“Hi my angels!! I missed you.” She giggled, letting one of them climb up onto her lap. She picked it up and nuzzled against it, pressing a kiss to its nose and hummed as it purred and went to kiss her nose. “Awe, thank you!” She cooed, setting it back down. She stood up when she heard Harry clear his throat, blushing a little. “Hi.” She giggled and brushed her skirt down. Y/N took her shoes off as usual and left them by the door before following him up the stairs to his bedroom. She’d noticed he had candles lit this time, had some fairy lights going too. Was he setting the mood? “It looks nice in here.” She complimented, taking a seat on his bed. “How was your week?” She asked, wanting to make some kind of conversation because she really didn’t want to just blurt out about how she’d been thinking about his dick the whole week.

“Thanks. M’gonna smoke a bit and look at my telescopes later so I made it cozy.” Harry shrugged. Also, it would be easier for her to be comfortable around him. A good atmosphere was important. “What about you?” He laid his laptop out on his bed. Today he was in comfortable clothes. A sweatshirt and joggers but— it was kind of hot. He had a tank top underneath, so he slid it off and let himself be clothed in just the tank. It showed off a nice amount of tattoos. His parents were cool like that. They let him get them as long as he did well. Said it was his body and his choice to regret it if he did one day. “Ah, Muffin likes you.” The orange kitty weaved around her legs, mewing to be picked up. It did indeed love Y/N and her good energy.

“Is that what you do most nights then?” Y/N asked curiously, wondering if astronomy was something he was majorly into. “Didn’t know you were into astronomy.... then again, I don’t know a lot about you so.” Y/N chuckled and blushed, swallowing thickly as she admired his tattoos. “Those are really nice by the way.” She spoke, nodding to his arm. Y/N knew she was awkward with making conversation, but hopefully he got the hint that she wanted to hear more about him if he let her. “I’m supposed to go to Timmy’s later.” She explained, knowing he probably wouldn’t like that. Truth be told, she’d rather stay here with Harry, but she hadn’t spent any time with her boyfriend this week and she felt bad. “Hi muffin.” She cooed down at the kitten in her lap, “you get as cozy as you’d like, okay?” She told the cat not expecting it to respond with a meow. Y/N looked at Harry with wide eyes when it happened, “oh my goodness!!”

He laughed under his breath. She was going to her boyfriends after getting her shit wrecked by Harry? Part of him liked it. She would go and think about how Harry was by far a better choice. There were no ifs ands or buts. He was annoyed on another part because he wasn’t sure why she kept giving the dude the tone of day, but apparently that wasn’t his business. A slight smile came on his face as he looked at her with the cat in her, astonished that she had talked back to her. 

“She likes you quite a bit.” He commented, bringing his computer to his lap. “But thanks, about the tattoos. I love em. And I love astronomy. The stars and all that stuff. My dad works at NASA, so I’d like to go there too.” He hummed. “Not an astronaut cause, I’d go crazy being trapped in a ship but... learning about it. It’s cool.”

Y/N was surprised to hear it, but her heart did swell. Something about men that loved the stars made her all gooey because they were naturally dreamers regardless if they saw it that way or not. She knew Harry was artsy, liked that he was in fact, it gave him a lot more depth. Fuck. She needed to stop thinking that way. 

“That’s so cool! You have to be really smart for that.” Y/N said, knowing he must have to be a genius to work for NASA. It was an extremely complicated job, lots of math involved, but Harry seemed to be somewhat offended at her question. “No, no— I didn’t mean it like that, I just.. sorry, I knew you were smart I just. I shouldn’t have assumed, I’m sorry.” She spoke, feeling herself blush. He was far smarter than her that’s for sure. She of course was just trying to be a teacher, well.. she didn’t quite know what she wanted to be yet. Y/N was often stuck in feeling like she didn’t really have a purpose.

“It’s cool, I get it. A miswording.” Harry chuckled as he saw her panic that she offended him. He was used to people putting him off as a lazy student because of his looks and calm demeanor. But she obviously didn’t mean it. “Yeah, it’s what I want to do. Lucky my dad is there but I’m not gonna get a job by slacking, so I make sure to get A’s. A lot of people don’t expect it of me but it’s fun. School is really easy for me.” He didn’t have to try. He was that lucky bitch. It came to him naturally. “But what about you? What do you want to do?” He was curious what she would be interested in. If she wanted to be something specific or if she was figuring it out. He could see her doing something artsy or with literature. She seemed to be a bit bookish when it came to that.

Y/N was happy to know he did well in school, glad he found it easy because she was often panicked with how difficult it could be whenever there was all too much going on. “I think that’s great though, it’s nice to have a passion.” She said, petting the kitty in her lap. “I um... I don’t really know yet. I thought I wanted to be a teacher, cause I really like little kids and I’d really like to help them learn.” Y/N explained, “but sometimes I wonder what else I could do? I second guess myself a lot.” It was a struggle for her internally but she knew she’d figure it out eventually. She did have lots of passions, writing being one of them, she just didn’t think it was worth the stress of money. She let out a deep breath, watching the cat jump out of her lap to get some attention from Harry. She went to work on the project wanting to get a lot done so that they could do stuff, if of course he wanted to. Again, she didn’t want to assume that it was a more than one time thing.

“It’s okay. It’s definitely hard. You don’t have to know now. I’m lucky cause my parents just let me find what I like and I was early on with what I liked. They put a pressure on us to know right now and we don’t have to.” Harry shrugged. “My whole side of my dad’s family is into space and engineering. It was funny when he married my mum because they’re kind of opposite? He’s practical in work but goofy as shit at home. My mom is like... the best. But she’s the one who makes sure my dad doesn’t just buy a Jeep for the fuck of it.” He laughed. Their careers and their personalities matched well though. It was easy to open up to Y/N because she genuinely seemed interested in what he had to say. Plus, it wasn’t classified information. “What do you like? You should try and look into stuff that’s like... that you’ll enjoy. No sense in working a job you hate forever.”

“Your parents seem really cool.” Y/N smiled brightly at him, genuinely happy that he had a good life. Harry didn’t deserve to feel hurt ever. No. He had a good head on his shoulders and a great support system. She felt like there was a spot for a nice girl in his life, but it seemed like he wasn’t actively searching for one? Maybe that was a sore subject. She let out a breath, “I really like writing, it’s fun for me to express myself in that way. But I don’t think I’d be a very good writer as a job or anything. That’s mainly why I said I’d be happy with teaching, cause I know I couldn’t ever be upset knowing I’m teaching little kids something... giving them a good example. Know how important it is to have good teachers that make you feel comfortable.” Y/N was really enjoying just getting to know Harry. It was easy talking to him, he was lovely, really. No judgement at all and of course he gave great advice. It was then that she got interrupted by a call. It was Timmy. 

“Hey... is everything alright?” She knew he wouldn’t call unless it was urgent.

“Hey, Uh... I don’t think we can do Tonight. We’re super busy with the committee and planning stuff and I wouldn’t be good company.” He said distractedly. He was very focused on being student body president again and he took it far too seriously. “We can go out one day next week? It’ll calm down after I get reelected!” No it wouldn’t. He was always coming up with excuses. “But— sorry, they got food and we’re working on a new slogan for the posters. I’ll talk to you later, sorry.” 

Harry could see her face fall and her lip start to tremble. He immediately felt concern, moving to sit up more on the bed and tilted his head as she let the phone fall on the bed. “Hey... what’s up?” He asked gently. Not sure what was going on but knowing that he probably should be concerned by the look on her face. “What happened?”

Of course. Excuses as usual. Y/N was trying, trying really hard to be a good girlfriend or whatever the fuck she was. God, she wanted to have a nice conversation with him today, ask him what had been up with him recently but he had been avoiding her like the plague. He didn’t like her even as a friend? Was that it? Even if he was gay, she could only hope he would tell her instead of stringing her along. Y/N wasn’t sure what to do because realistically it shouldn’t hurt her this much, but she had been with him for three whole years, been best friends before that. Course it hurts. Y/N swallowed thickly, tears starting to fall down her face as she looked at Harry. He’d think it was stupid. It was no secret that Harry didn’t like Timothée, at least to her at least. She didn’t want to look stupid. 

“Timmy he’s busy with the campaign is stuff... said we can’t hang out.” Y/N sniffled, wiping her eyes. She was crying more so cause she was embarrassed. She felt like everyone knew and she was just getting dragged along.

Anger welled in him. How many times was this asshole going to hurt her heart? How could he not see he was selfishly dragging this shit out and leading her on when she could be out of that relationship and be shown an actual thing or two about a man. 

“No... Y/N, don’t cry.” He whispered. Internally, he felt panicked but he moved over to where she sat and placed an arm around her. “It’s alright. He’s a loser for that. But I feel like there’s more to why you’re so upset about it.” He rubbed her back, trying to soothe her the best he possibly could. “Does he do this a lot?” He was curious, trying to understand her complete meltdown now from him not wanting to hang out. It had to be a common thing if she was this upset over it.

Hearing the words ‘dont cry’ only made her cry more, hiding her face in his chest. She didn’t trust her voice yet, a sob coming from her as she nodded her head to let him know it was a regular thing. 

“Sorry...” She sniffled, trying to catch her breath properly. “I’m just embarrassed...” Y/N explained, “cause he just— he’d rather do anything than hang out with me.... and you know, now I’m suspecting he might not be straight, but to his knowledge he still thinks I don’t know. So he’s just— I don’t want to pressure him into coming out if he isn’t ready either! What if he isn't?” She felt more tears fall, wiping them aggressively. “Feel really stupid for being upset cause I feel like everyone knows except for me, and he’s just dragging me along and isn’t even trying to fake it— just hurts cause you know, thought he’d want to at least hang out with me cause he thinks I’m cool or whatever but apparent not.” Y/N felt very hurt, her heart cracking because she felt like everything was falling apart quite quickly and she didn’t want to just dump it all on Harry like this.

“Woah... hold on there. He’s the idiot, bunny.” He left a pet name slip. “What type of person does that shit to someone else? You are very cool. Very pretty. There’s nothing wrong with you. It’s a him issue. A hundred percent not a you thing, love.” He was positive about that. Y/N hadn’t done anything to deserve this, at all. It made him sad to think that she could possibly be feeling as though it’s genuinely her fault. “It’s not stupid to be upset either. It’s valid. Doesn’t matter if he's straight or not. He’s pushing and stringing you along and not giving you anything but a title for it. I watched you both this week a bit. Sorry If that’s creepy but... he doesn’t treat you right. Even as a friend.” He explained. It made him so sad to think that the boy was hurting her for no damn reason. “Can I tell you something? I was wicked excited to hang out with you today. I've been looking forward to it all week. I don’t like hanging with lame people so... you’re definitely very cool.”

Y/N chuckled at his comment, sniffling a bit. “Are you sure you weren’t excited because you knew you’d get some?” She asked, looking up at him with wide eyes. Y/N wasn’t assuming he was like that, but no part of her believed she was cool enough for Harry and her tone displayed that. Harry was being very sweet to her and he absolutely didn’t have to. She could have just excused herself and collected herself and carried on with the project but he was being insistent on calming her down. She let out shaky breaths, staying snuggled into his chest because she found it to be the most comfortable thing. “Sorry I’m crying all over your shirt.” Y/N chuckled and pulled back, looking up at him with her eyes all blown. She liked him. She liked him a lot but she knew that he wouldn’t want to be involved with someone like her. She was such a baby and was scared of everything. She didn’t do drugs, didn’t go to parties, she wasn’t sexy. She just minded her business and watched anime at home.

“Woah... no, that wasn’t why I was excited. I mean, I was hoping we would do something but I wasn’t gonna push it if it didn't feel right. You’re a genuinely cool girl, Y/N. I don’t have a ton of Friends so like... it’s cool to find someone I think I can be friends with.” He was sad she felt that perhaps that was her only worth to him. It wasn’t at all. “It’s okay. Don’t worry about the shirt, I don’t want you to be sad.” He continued rubbing her back gently. Poor Y/N. She was a mess in her mind. “But you’re a lot more than just a hookup. To anyone. You’ve got a ton of worth and you’re fun to be around regardless.” He didn’t like the thought of her being sad. “We can just hang out after we finish the part we’re working on. We’re already ahead. I’ll uh... I can show you some constellations if you wanted?”

It really did mean a lot to her to hear him say that. Y/N always felt that she was constantly in her boyfriend’s shadow, always being called ‘Timmy’s girlfriend’ and never by her name at times. Y/N wanted to be her own person, liked that that’s how Harry saw her. It made her feel all warm inside. Her eyes rested up again but she didn’t cry, a smile finding its way to her face before she practically jumped him with a hug. Y/N squeezed him tight, nuzzling her face into his neck. 

“Thank you.” She mumbled quietly against his shoulder, holding on to him tight for a while. 

“I’d really like that.. the constellations.” She told him quietly as she loosened her grip, but stayed hugging him closely. It felt really nice.

“Great. There’s a ladder I have— we can get up to the roof and look at ‘em. It’s safe.” He had been up there so much that there was a railing on the roof his dad hired someone to put up. Just in case. “In the meantime, I can order pizza or something while we work? By the time it gets here we’ll be done.” He suggested. Feeling the nod in his neck he smiled, grabbing his phone and calling his favorite pizza place. 

She had stayed in his lap while he ordered, his fingers going up and down her side as he got them a cheese and pepperoni as well as some of those cinnamon dessert sticks. She needed it after a hard day. Harry didn’t like physical touch all that much when it came to strangers but he already considered her a friend. 

----

Working went by rather quickly after her little cry, they’d both decided they had done a lot of work today so they started packing up and Y/N was getting more relaxed. She had put her stuff in her backpack and moved it off of his bed by the door so they had more space. He was getting ready to go outside, gathering some things. 

“Know you said you were going to smoke, you still can if you want, don’t want to ruin your night.” Y/N said softly, standing beside him as he opened the door to the roof. It was really cool how he had a place to look at all of the stars, his family must be extremely proud of him. 

Harry helped her climb up and gave her a blanket to lay out while he brought all of his stuff up. He seemed really excited to be doing all of this and that made her smile, she was excited to get to know him on this level, hear him talk about things he was passionate about. 

In Harry’s eyes, she couldn’t ruin his night. Not when she was excited to learn about the stars and things like that. She didn’t make fun. Instead she accepted his passion and was eager to have him explain. He grabbed some of his equipment, bringing it up so they could look at the planets visible if they wanted to. The door was closed so the cats didn’t follow them up there, Harry also bringing a sweatshirt for her to wear. It felt weird, giving a girl a piece of clothing to wear. Usually he hooked up and left. But Y/N deserved more respect than that. She was hurting. 

“Here— Uh, you can wear this cause it’s a bit chilly.” He murmured, handing it to her to put on as he put the telescope down and sat down next to her. She did, and he was happy because it was getting nippy out even though during the day it had been warm. “Let’s see... let’s look at constellations first and then I can show you my telescope and see other stuff.”

Y/N felt really cozy now that she was wrapped up in the warmth of Harry’s sweatshirt. She’d seen him wear it earlier, he also wore it to school. It was a big navy one that said, don’t trip. She knew that this didn’t mean anything though, he just didn’t want her to be cold is all. She pulled the sleeves up over her hands, pawing them up for optimum comfort and laid back on the blankets with him so it was easier to see. She scooted closer, looking up at the clear night sky. It was quite dark outside, but the moonlight illuminated everything just enough for them to be able to see what they were doing. Y/N was looking up at a bunch of stars, clearly, but she only knew a few constellations. 

“Alright then, educate me, Mr. Styles.” She said with a small hum, just joking around with him.

“Starting simple I suppose. So... up there.” Harry pointed, getting close to her so they would have similar lines of sight. “That’s the Little Dipper. And right over there? The big one.” He traced them outline with his finger. “When I was little I wanted to be a star. Everyone thought I meant like an actor or something but no. I literally meant I wanted to be one of the stars.” He chuckled. “I study them instead. But it gets a bit overwhelming sometimes.” He adjusted his body so theirs were pushed together for optimum warmth and accuracy. “Each of the stars that makes up the constellation is a different galaxy. Our sun is a star. Isn’t that wild? Like... we are the stars in other universes. We are in their sky.” He paused. “At least if you believe in that sort of things. I do.

Y/N moved so that she was laying on the inner part of his arm, closer to his chest. It was a lot easier to look at them this way. She gasped as he pointed out the two, smiling because it really was beautiful. “You know... I have freckles that look like a Little Dipper on my arm.” She was really proud of that, and felt like he would appreciate the little fact. “Aren’t some of them like... based on Greek myth and stuff?” She asked curiously, naturally nerdy about those types of things. Y/N liked all kinds of mythological stories, loved hearing about what they were meant to teach people. She didn’t necessarily believe, but sometimes she wanted to. 

Harry was very comfortable to lay on. They hadn’t exactly cuddled like this before, but she hoped that it wouldn’t be the last time they did this because she was much calmer now. She felt a lot more relaxed.

“Mhm. There’s Orion and his belt. The seven sisters. You can see them over there.” He pointed each one out. “The seven sisters is a star cluster that I particularly like. I always wonder what lies behind them. If it’s incredibly hot wherever it is because of the nearness of the stars.” He liked feeling her lay on him like this. It was relaxing. She was good to lay around with. “I suppose we’ll never know the absolute truth, unless a new technology comes out that allows us to go light years. Or aliens. Either way.” He was joking but also, not really. He believed in aliens. “Over there  is the Gemini constellation. The twins. Also an astrological sign. Leo, the lion. Pisces. Represents Aphrodite and Eros tying themselves together to escape typhon, the worst monster in mythology.” Harry murmured. “I sit for hours out here and just stare. I know it’s a bit weird but it’s comforting at the same time it’s scary.  That we’re so small and insignificant in the grand scheme of things but... our beings can mean the world to someone else.”

Y/N nodded along, listening intently as he spoke. The sound of his voice alone was soothing, but she found herself turning her head to look at him instead of the stars an awful lot. She thought he was beautiful, especially in the moonlight. She needed to cut it out though. He was a good friend to her, she shouldn’t be getting too ahead of herself when she had just found something good. 

“Think it’s really cool... always wondered about stuff like that. Space is really scary but very fascinating.” She said and let out a sigh, “if you ever want to talk about it more, we can...” Y/N blushed, genuinely wanting to hear random space facts if that was something he wanted to do. 

She was finding that the little crush she’d always had on him was for good reason. He was a really cool guy. Really really cool. He was so relaxed and laid back, the amount of calmness he displayed was incredible. Maybe hanging out with him more would teach her to relax better.

“Yeah? You’re cool, Y/N.” Harry smiled at her efforts. She was really trying. Really, really trying to be a good friend to him and god if it didn’t make him want to make out with her. “Did you want to smoke with me? If not, I can sit at the roof door and we can talk from a distance so you don’t get any of the smoke.” He questioned. Harry didn’t want to pressure her but he did feel like perhaps she would like it. “It’s not scary or anything.” He could see her internal debate. “You’ll probably cough a bit at first. Some people are different. You’ll also probably be hungry, and it does make you a bit more horny than normal.  At least it does for me, 100%.” He laughed. Y/N could benefit from it. “But I like it cause it makes me feel a lot more relaxed and loosened up. It feels nice to not worry about tests or the future for a bit.”

Y/N looked at him with a bashful but curious gaze, “I um... yeah, I’d like to.” She said with a nod. It seemed like a good idea, relaxing? being hungry and horny? Sign her up. She knew he wouldn’t put her up to anything that could endanger her, besides, he did it all the time and he was just fine. She sat up and watched as he took out a little box, pulling out a ziplock bag of green clusters and a circular object. Y/N watched as he broke about a green cluster and placed it into the object, twisting it to grind up the weed. He meticulously rolled up one perfectly packed joint, pulling out a lighter before setting the box to the side. She was a little nervous, but he made it look so easy. Y/N watched as he lit it and inhaled with ease, it looked simple enough. She just had to breathe in. He passed it to her with no rush and she brought it to her lips and inhaled. Y/N felt the smoke fill her lungs but she did start coughing, getting used to the sensation. 

“That was so weird.” She laughed a bit as she coughed but took another hit nonetheless, this time a bit more prepared.

“Yeah, it can be trippy when you first try and do it but it gets better.” Harry smiled at her attempts. It was admirable that she was so easily trying new things. It was something he liked about her. She didn’t judge much. They passed it back and forth and Harry had the bright idea to move everything inside before he was too lazy to, first bringing down the telescope and then helping her down the stairs. 

“Wait— look at this. Lay on the bed.” He grinned, watching her confused face. He turned the lights down and flicked on the star projector that filled the room with many star-like projections. It made his room look like space. Even better when high. He hopped next to her in his bed. “What do you think?”

Y/N knew that she’d feel all floaty when high, but this was really cool. Everything felt like it was in slow motion. She carefully maneuvered down from the roof with Harry’s help, pulling off the hoodie because she suddenly felt very warm. 

“Woah!” Y/N’s eyes went wide as she looked around the room. “You didn’t show me this last time!” She looked at him with a look of wonder. It was very much amusing. She laid back and closed her eyes a bit, just soaking in the moment and how much it smelled like him in his bed. “Feels really nice...” She said lazily to him, “can you come here please?” Y/N asked, her voice going all cute and soft. She just wanted to cuddle again. On the roof it was really nice and she thought it would be even nicer on a bed.

“Yeah, sure.” Harry liked her clingy. She was lovely this way. Being high made her ask for things she wanted, apparently and that was good for his sake. He immediately was met as a cuddly Y/N when he moved closer to her, letting her curl up next to him. Harry was feeling things out but he was curious to know what she liked. What she would want to do if they continued hanging out. 

“How do you feel? Both being high and hanging out with me?” He wanted to show her how it felt to have a true friend. Someone who treated her nicely. That oui oui baguette boy obviously didn’t treat her how she needed to be treated. “You want to be friends with me, right? Cause we could do this shit all the time. I smoke with Zayn and Niall but they’re like, suuuuuper obnoxious with it.”

Y/N happily swooped her leg over Harry’s hip, her arm moving around his waist while her head rested on his chest. She sighed feeling finally comfortable, letting out slow and relaxed breaths as he spoke. 

“I feel... floaty. Like, I have no thoughts yet somehow I can form sentences? It’s strange, but very cool.” Y/N giggled and shifted her head so she could breath in his scent a bit better. “I do want to be friends with you, you’re really nice.” Y/N spoke honestly, “if you would rather smoke with me or just hang out, we can hang out whenever you want...” Now that she was high she wasn’t really thinking about how things came out, she was sort of just saying them and hoping for the best. “I’m hungry.” She mumbled, “but I’m also comfy.” Y/N huffed, making it out to be the biggest dilemma in human history. She sat up though, remembered they had gotten pizza and smiled when she saw it sitting over on the coffee table. “Harry! You’re a genius!” She smiled and went to grab his cheeks. She kissed him once and got up to go grab the box to bring over to them.

He was surprised at how quickly she had kissed him, scurrying over time the pizza box and coming back to him. It was amazing. Y/N was sitting there looking all sorts of innocent when she had just kissed him and not even thought twice about it. She was munching happily on the pizza and he took a piece as well, letting her get comfy as they sat up on the bed to eat. 

“I’m glad you want to hang out with me. I’m a cool guy sometimes, I think.” He had been told many a time that he was cool by his friends but it felt good to know she wanted to be around. 

“I think you’ll like my friends. They’re idiots but they mean well.” He did love his friends even when they were stupid. They went to parties together and mooched off of the free alcohol. “But I definitely don’t kiss my friends like I do with you. Nothin’ against them, they’re attractive but, I’m not into beer breath.”

Y/N did a little happy dance while she munched on her pizza, focusing on getting as much as she could into her belly because it seemed like she could swallow the whole earth. “You are a cool guy. The coolest. Everyone at school wants to be friends with you.” She said honestly, knowing the hot gossip. “But I win.” She giggled, taking a sip of her water that she had laying next to her. Y/N felt herself getting full but then again she did just finish her third slice. The cinnamon sticks were her next victims, she let out a moan at the taste. “Really? Well, I don’t really kiss anyone like I kiss you anyway so....” Y/N shrugged, basically saying that he was the only person she kissed with passion and desire. Yeah she kissed Timothée but kissing him was more of a chore now that their relationship was falling apart.

“Yeah? That's a good stroke to my ego.” He did like knowing Y/N was happy with kissing him like that. He couldn’t help but be a bit proud of that. “You’re a great kisser. But if you keep moaning like that I’m gonna be tempted to bend you over.” His threat was lazy but he would happily play with her again. He wasn’t sure about fucking her. He didn’t want her to regret it. But she had the best ass and beautiful tits and he wanted to see her naked. “What? Don’t look shocked. You’re makin’ me hard with that moaning over food. You’ve got a sexy as fuck voice. I like Hearing it. Plus, I’m already attracted to you and know what your pussy tastes like so the weed isn’t helping my cock.”

“Well, I am a bit shocked.” Y/N chuckled, “Didn’t realize I was doing anything.” She blushed, putting the cinnamon sticks down because now they were getting into some serious talk. “I like when you talk like that..” Y/N told him, smoothing over her skirt a bit to try and distract herself but it definitely wasn’t working. The weed was definitely giving her a bit of confidence, mostly because her anxiety was shut off and she was just speaking freely. Of course, she still had that sweet innocence to her, that wouldn’t go away no matter how hard she tired. “Obviously haven’t done anything except for what we did the other day so... know I’m not exactly the sexiest.” She chuckled and looked up at him. She was aware of some of the different things you could do during sex but she wasn’t one to research. It made her feel gross watching other people, most because she didn’t find the men attractive and that was kind of the most important part.

“You’re sexy. Don’t say that about yourself cause you 100% are incredibly sexy.” Harry stopped that right away. He didn’t like her thinking that she was anything but a sexy little thing. “I love your innocence but... trust me. The used panties I came all over prove that you’re hot as fuck. You’ve got a dirty side. Just haven’t tapped into it yet.” He hummed. “I’m glad to know that you like me talking like that. You’ll be happy to know that I am willing to teach you or talk to you about anything you’d want to know, including sex. That much I am a very hands on teacher.” He wiggled his brows to make her laugh. “Do you wanna know somethin?” He asked. When he got the curious look he continued. “I couldn’t stop staring at your ass the other day. When you wore leggings. You stood right in front of the tree my friends and I stand outside of. You got excited and jumped a bit and your ass jiggled. When I tell you I was half hard the rest of the day...” He really was. “You’ve got the best ass. M’obsessed.”

“Really?” Y/N was intrigued. Did he really want to teach her about sex? Would he show her things and make her feel the way she felt the other day? It seemed like an offer she couldn’t pass up at all. “Not turned off by how I don’t know stuff?” She asked with furrowed brows, it was always something she was insecure about. “I know literally nothing though... I don’t really like watching porn it makes me feel gross.” His little story about her ass though? That made her rather excited. She had worn leggings because she had gym that day, thinking that her shirt would cover enough of her ass but clearly it didn’t. Not that she really cared because it was Harry who was looking. “Usually when I wear leggings I don’t wear underwear.” She said mindlessly as she took a sip of her water. “Is that something you like then? Are you like.. a butt guy?” She asked curiously, wanting to know more about what he liked. “I know you... you have a lot of sex, yeah?” Y/N asked with a blush, feeling like she’d get jealous if he answered.

“You weren’t wearing anything under them?” Harry felt his body want to explode. “Just walkin’ about with  no panties and.. fuck me.” That was unfair. Cruel, really. He didn’t have his hands on her that day, and he would think of it every day forward. “I am an ass guy. I love tits too, don’t get me wrong but... there’s something about ass I love. But— I mean, I don’t have a ton, no. It depends. S’like an itch. If I need to scratch it, I will.” He could tell she would be disgruntled if he told her about his sexual escapades. “I know enough to teach you stuff. Whatever you’d want to learn. I’m not too shy of a guy when it comes to that stuff so you can ask me whatever you want. As long as you don’t mind me being dirty mouthed when I talk.” Harry got off on words. So knowing she was interested in asking things? He loved that.

“How often do you have an itch?” Y/N asked, raising her brow at him. Y/N did want to know, part of her did even if she would get a bit pissy about it. She had no reason to be territorial, but she just wanted to be the only girl he went to when he did have an itch. Y/N liked whatever they did the other day, no one had ever made her feel like that. She felt so sexy and beautiful and good. “I don’t mind.” Y/N shrugged, moving closer to him to get comfortable again. “It’s hot in here.” She sighed, getting up off the bed so she could take off her little corduroy dress. It still wasn’t enough though so she simply stayed in her little white socks with a laced rim and her set of underwear that had the cute red hearts on it. She slid back down on the bed and looked up at the ceiling, “okay so like.. what do you like to do most then? Obviously there’s the actual sex but like, describe your fantasy. Mine happened the other day so honestly everything’s sort of free game now.”

“I swear to god, you’re my wet dream.” Harry closed his eyes as he tried to center himself. “Jesus... look at you.” He muttered, rolling his eyes over her body. “Love this shit. You’re not trying to be sexy, you just are.” His finger ran over the waistband of the panties on her hip before pulling back. “I like.. well, I love anal. Of course I love pussy, specifically the idea of cumming in one. But I haven’t done that yet. M’not into the idea of knocking up someone random but. I can’t lie and say that it isn’t something that’s hot to me. The idea of like... owning someone like that. A part of me in them. It’s hot but a lot of girls would think I’m actually trying time get them pregnant.” He rolled his eyes. “But I love dirty talk. have a filthy mouth and I know you’re aware of it.” He laughed quietly, pinching his bottom lip. “But yeah, I like eating pussy. Obviously. I like dirty shit, but anal is definitely something I love. Think it’s cause it’s a bit wrong in some people’s eyes. And ass is tight as fuck.” His eyes took in her curves. Yeah. Her ass would be the tightest. It’s never been touched. “What do you mean... your fantasy was the other day?”

Y/N was pleased that he liked her little set, “I did wear it for you in all fairness.” She shrugged a bit and flipped over so she was laying on her stomach, looking over at him while she rested on her elbows. Definitely so she could have her ass up and her tits on display. That was a subconscious choice though. “Never even touched my butt in that way before.” Y/N spoke innocently, “does it feel good?” She asked, genuinely curious. Everyone has an ass so of course maybe he’d know how it felt. “Oh, I’ve like... I’ve thought about what happened the other day a lot. Like, sitting in your lap and having you touch me like that and stuff... really like your hands, I think about them a lot too. And your lips, they’re like perfectly plump.” Y/N didn’t realize he didn’t know she had a crush on him. Her high brain assumed she’d told him.

“It does, but you’ve got to work slowly if you’ve never done it before. Some people like pain so they don’t work themselves open before but I always say that you should... ya know, get fingered or licked out back there and make yourself relax.” He wasn’t surprised she hadn’t touched back there though. “I’m interested to know... you’ve thought about me before? I didn’t know this. I didn’t think you realized I existed much.” He raised a brow, eying her ass. He moved a hand down to rest it on her lower back, playing with her panties. “My hands? That’s interesting. I’m just shocked you knew me. Let alone had those thoughts about me. Wow... that’s fucking cute.” He grinned. “What else did you think about me doing to you?”

Y/N looked away from him bashfully, simply letting him touch her however he wanted to. She really liked his forwardness, it got her going. “Yeah... I’ve had a crush on you since freshman year.” Y/N admitted, playing with her hands. “Thought about you a lot, cause like... you’re what I wanted timmy to be like.” High Y/N clearly spoke freely. Y/N had to think about his next question because in all honesty, she didn’t really know. “I haven’t really thought about anything else like that, just the basic stuff... I don’t know about all of the other things, I know lots of people are into different things.” Kinks, she was talking about kinks. “Is there anything like that that you like? Like— stuff that when you think about it you get all gooey inside? Or sometimes it makes you feel really alert and squirmy?” Y/N asked, remembering how often she’d see him and get that way. “Always liked seeing you skate and stuff, like your jaw gets all clenched and you look kind of angry... liked how big and ruff your hands are... and your arms they’re nice too.”

“Yeah... I like some stuff.” Harry coughed. Fuck, he was gonna tell her too. He was liking the honesty between them as well, knowing she was happy to blurt out shit like how she liked his hands and arms and when he got angry. “Kinks... there’s a lot of things I like to try. I don’t think they count as kinks but I do enjoy spanking. Like, I’d kill to spank your ass. See my handprint on it. I like kinda rough stuff. Don’t let this scare you though cause— we don’t have to.” He warned her. It wasn’t intense stuff but he was aware she was a complete virgin. He didn’t want to scare her off. “Like... choking a little. Hair pulling. Spit exchange. I loved when you squirted on me, it was messy and hot and that shit gets me off. S’why I came so fast.” He murmured. “Also would love to try overstimulation on someone. Make ‘em cum as many times as they can take. Toys. I have a few I’d like to buy but I don’t have people who come round to fuck. I wouldn’t do it at home with a rando. so... you’re definitely special.” He laughed. His hand was sneaking lower. “Mm, I love a bit of power exchange. And I like to be called Daddy. Fuckin hot.”

Y/N was very intrigued, her pupils likely blown out by the idea of Harry doing all these things to her. If he liked that kind of stuff, she’d definitely try it, because the other day she felt so good. 

“The other day you made me cum like three times and it hurt but like.. it felt good?” She explained, “think I like pain though.” That would explain why she liked the concept of him spanking her so much. She liked the idea of being someone special for him. If he wanted to try stuff with her he could, she just wanted to be adored. It was then, when he told her he liked being called daddy that she felt herself whimper. She was getting really horny just talking about all of this stuff, but she was mostly curious about the ass stuff. So, she decided to be bold because the weed was giving her a new found confidence in her relaxed self. Y/N looked at him for a moment, feeling his hand resting on her ass. She moved it up against his hand and let out another little whine.

“Daddy? Can you play with my bum please?”’

Well, fuck. That was something. Something Harry really, really wanted to do. 

“Christ...yeah, I can do that.” He whispered, happy that she was as into this as he was. Because— he definitely was. He moved, rounding her body so he could get the perfect view, the perfect angle so he could touch. He groaned when she stuck it into the air for him, swaying back and forth. She was trying to tempt him, and it was working. He gripped her hips before pulling her towards him, letting out a breath as he took it in. “Fuck me. You've got... the perfect ass.” He whispered, running his hand over it. Pulling the panties up so they were right on her , shaking them a bit before letting them go. “You... are so much trouble, little thing. Aren’t you? Gonna drive me mad.. walkin’ round in leggings with no panties on. Daddy’s gonna have to grab you and play with you next time I see you in them to check.” He muttered, beginning to peel them down. “Fuck, you’re soaked again.” He could see the wetness still stringing to the panties and he used a finger to catch some of it, licking it clean.

It was becoming clear that Y/N was less shy when she was horny. It was the one this she wasn’t afraid of asking for, especially after having that whole conversation with him. She liked knowing what he liked, now she could bring it up if she ever wanted him to touch her. She let out a pleased squeal when he pulled her towards him by the hips, leaning down when her knees brand so her ass could be as high up as possible. Y/N pulled a pillow down so she could rest her head on it and look back at him. She moaned at the idea of him pulling her away at school to mess with her. 

“You always make me messy, daddy.” She told him, lifting her legs so he could pull her panties all the way off. Her cunt was needy, absolutely so, but she was intrigued by the idea of ass play. He seemed to be really into it too so she wanted to see him get all excited about it. “Can spank me if you want..” She gave him the go ahead, “Wanna try everything..”

He didn’t take a second chance. His hand came down, firmly on her ass. The panties off, he could see the skin jiggle under his hand and the pink mark begin to show, her squeal doing more to arouse him. Obviously she liked it, so he did it to the second cheek. 

“Naughty little girl. Hm. You like daddy’s hands spanking you.” Harry said with pleasure. “So gorgeous.” He rolled it in his hands, squeezing hard on the freshly spanked skin to watch her writhe a little bit. “So you’re dirty like me then.” He hummed, grabbing at her and gently pulling her legs apart. “Let’s see that pretty hole.” Of course it was pretty. Never been touched, small. He was going to wreck it. Even if it wasn’t today. “Fuck. M’gonna fuck this hole if it’s the last damn thing I do. Fuck me.” He leaned over and spit thickly on to it, thumb rubbing gently over it in circles. Letting her get a feel for it.

Y/N liked it. She liked it a lot and it scared her because she was unlocking something she wasn’t sure she was ready to face. That was a problem for sober and none feral Y/N to face, right now she was too busy loving every second of it. 

“Mmmmmmm” a long whine came from her as he rolled it in his hand, hands gripping at the pillow. Her legs spread with ease, her eyes closing as she relaxed the best she could. Y/N felt her cunt throb at his words, hearing him spit and feeling it drip down made her go absolutely insane. “Daaaaddyyyyy!” She whined, moving her ass back against his working thumb. Y/N was learning that she was also very impatient. Her cunt was in desperate need of attention and the thumb on her ass was only getting her more worked up. Thank god she’d showered before coming here and she was clean as a whistle.

“That sounds good coming from your mouth.” Harry whispered as his fingers ran over her ass. It was fine now to play with her. Y/N was a needy girl and he was finding this out day by day. “M’gonna play with you. Just lay and take it.” He settles and ran his tongue right on her hole. He knew she had never had this before so he wasn’t surprised when she jolted, but he simply spread her legs open again and took another lick. It was lovely. Not only because Harry genuinely liked eating ass but Y/N squealed, body squirming a bit with each lick. She was mouthy too, saying little babbles of how odd but good it felt.

Just lay and take it.

Oh my did Y/N like the sound of that. The feeling of him licking at her ass was different than when he ate her cunt. It was definitely pleasurable but not the same. Y/N didn’t think she could cum like this, but then again, he hasn’t exactly put his fingers in or anything. 

“Feels nice..” She hummed as she got used to it, hands tightening around the pillow. My god what was she doing? She had a boyfriend for fucks sake but this felt so damn good. Y/N couldn’t stop seeing Harry after this whole project thing ended. She needed to do this again, wanted to do this all again. It really couldn’t be anyone but him. He did say he was going to play with her, what else could be in store? “Ah! Daddy!” Y/N squeaked, feeling him poke his tongue inside. Tingles spread through her at the feeling, it did feel really good. It was then that she felt him press his thumb into her, her ass tightening around his finger. It was so unfamiliar, but she knew she just had to relax. 

“There we go. Not gonna do too much today work this. Gonna finger you and let you feel it, see the pleasure.” And then eat her out and cum on her ass. It sounded like a good plan. He slowly worked his thumb into her, moving down and licking from clit to her entrance. His thumb worked at her hole, giving her an abundance of sensations. “Hm. Maybe I’ll get a little vibrator and we can put it in your ass while I lick your little pussy. How’s that?” He asked. It was obvious that they weren’t going to stop doing this for a while. He was teaching her all about it now and he wasn’t going to stop. Not now. “Mm. Tastes so fucking good.” He took his thumb out, working in a longer finger. He wanted to fuck her ass with it while he licked at her pussy. “Feels nice too, hm? Havin’ me touch you everywhere?”

She whimpered at his offer, “please daddy..” Y/N pleaded all huffy and needy from the sensations. She was feeling him everywhere... it was making her go a bit crazy, especially because it seemed like an insane amount of teasing. It all felt really good, her whole body was feeling the waves of pleasure and all she could do was lay there and take it like he said. 

“Like it so much, daddy... I want to feel more of you..” Y/N knew he would only give her little bits of newness each time, but she really wanted to feel like one with him. She wanted to feel him properly, look him in the eyes and have him make her scream for him like he had before. Y/N was a whiny horny mess all over again, Harry having unlocked pleasures that she didn’t even know existed before today. “So good to me, make me feel so good..” She wished she could thank him in some way, help him out but he was insistent on showing her stuff.

He had made her cum 3 times again. They were even bigger than before and she had in fact squirted again but he loved it. After cleaning up, he had her lazy, fucked out and high body laying on him as he relaxed. 

“We’re gonna be good friends.” He hummed. Part of him was worried though. Because very quickly he was feeling a bit of a want for her. One where he could kiss her anytime he wanted but, she still was technically in a relationship. Regardless if he treated her shitty, it was still a title and he didn’t know how to ask her if she was going to break up with him. Did he even want a relationship? Would she want a relationship with him? Was he just a bad boy fantasy? 

Regardless, it didn’t matter. Y/N was going to be his friend.

She pressed soft kisses to his chest, relaxing he had yet to get shirtless or naked for her. It was always her. But maybe that’s just how he wanted to keep things. On a friend level. 

“Mhm...” Y/N hummed and again nuzzled her face into his neck, pressing soft kisses to his skin. “Thank you again...” She spoke just below his ear. “You me feel special.” Y/N was positive he was an angel sent to her. He truly made her feel like she was some heavenly being, made her reach highs she’d never felt and helped her let go of all the things that have her anxiety. She didn’t know how she could possibly thank him for it, but she would somehow. It wasn’t going to be hard to keep this from Timmy considering he barely hung out with her anymore, but she was going on a date with him sometime next week like he promised. She needed to talk to him, ask him about them and how he felt about them and why they weren’t having sex. She needed to get to the bottom of it.

The weird thing was, Y/N made Harry feel special too. And that scared him a little bit. It was difficult to get Harry to the point where he felt a deep connection with someone because he did fear a betrayal. Granted, he was the one helping her with a betrayal of someone else but... it felt so different. With the girls he slept with before, it was clear cut that it was only one night and it didn’t mean anything besides scratching an itch. He couldn’t say that about Y/N. He cared about her. Even more so finding out she had had a crush on him. It would hurt her more if he was a dick. She was sensitive emotionally and Harry was mindful of that. But he didn’t want to get attached when she already seemed attached to Timmy. He would have broken up with him by now if he was in her position. He wondered why it was taking so long. But either way— he wasn’t going to sleep with her fully until she was single. Just in case.

-------------------------------------------

[part 3]

A/N: the saga continues.... they really do get bold - n + d

let us know what you think!

masterlist

[thischickwritessometimes]

MYSME RBB

Hey!! I joined my first ever collab this year for the Mystic Messenger fandom! It was totally awesome, and I lucked out and got someone super cool as my artist. Shout out to @thedum1, who was my partner for this. Go check out their amazing art that goes along with my writing, and give them some love. Without further ado, here’s the fic!

(You can also find this on ao3!)

Saeyoung decided that he’d been sitting in one place for far too long. His back was screaming in agony, his eyes were trying desperately to make the computer screen focus, and his head felt like it was stuffed full of cotton. All of those combined to make him feel miserable, like he was going to explode if he sat there for even one more minute. 

He shut down his workstation, making sure that his work remained where it was, the computer encoded carefully to make sure that no one could get into it and change things. Of course, if someone was going to get in, they’d have to break through the security in his house, which wasn’t likely to happen. He’d just figured out the best password for his front gate, after all. As Saeyoung idly considered his password (and other possible future ones), he slid on his shoes and grabbed his jacket. 

He stopped in the kitchen to grab a package of Honey Buddha Chips and then was off, heading into town on some form of a quest. The destination isn’t important, he tells himself, just the experience. He just needed some fresh air, a sight that wasn’t his computer screen (or, more recently, the wall slightly above and behind his computer), and perhaps a reminder that there were other humans in the world outside of himself and Vanderwood.

He hummed to himself as he walked, enjoying the sun on his skin and the sounds of birds and people talking. Couples were walking just about everywhere in the park, each chatting and laughing happily. Some younger kids were running around chasing each other. A dog sprinted past Saeyoung, chasing a stick that had just been thrown. 

The dog reminded him of Elly. She always was willing to run around his feet happily as he played with her in Jumin’s apartment. He missed the white cat. It’d been far too long since he last saw her, and he mentally decided to schedule a time to break through his friend’s security to see the fluffy Persian again.

As he walked along, a flyer for a pet shop caught his eye. It was advertising a day to come play with the animals, both cats and dogs alike. As he stopped to read it more thoroughly, Saeyoung realized that if he headed to the shop right now he could get in at least an hour and a half with the cats (and maybe some dogs too). Now armed and ready with a plan of action, he set off with a purpose, striding quickly to the pet store.

As he neared it, he noticed that not many people were lingering around. Saeyoung realized that this must be one of the less popular pet shops and was sad to see that, especially because it looked very charming and quaint. As he pushed open the door, a bell above his head let out a quiet sound to alert an employee that someone had arrived.

Sure enough, a slightly frazzled-looking young man appeared. His hair was shaggy and black, long enough that it was falling into his eyes just slightly. The eyes in question were a stunning blue-green that Saeyoung wouldn’t mind looking into for a while. He tried to shake off that thought. He was here for cute cats, not cute people.

“How can I help you?” The guy asked, a small smile on his face. 

“I’m here to play with the cats. I saw a flyer saying that you guys had free time for that?”

“Oh, of course! Right this way. I think there’s only one other person in there, so it shouldn’t be that much of a crowd. Feel free to use any of the toys out. And don’t worry, the only one that scratches is our resident sourpuss, Yoshi.” The employee opened the door carefully and Saeyoung peered in, amazed at all the cats running around or napping. 

There was one girl sitting happily in the middle of the room, surrounded by cats. She had a dark skin tone and was wearing a pink skirt and what Saeyoung was pretty sure was a halter top. (How he knew that? Well, let’s just say that he had been considering one for cosplay for a long time.) When she turned to look at him, he spotted glasses and heterochromatic eyes. One brown, the other a bright blue. 

She’s cute, was his first thought. It only amplified when he realized that her hair had a piece sticking up that looked to be meticulously formed into a heart like you would see on a lovesick anime girl. Her dedication spoke volumes and he knew that he would probably end up liking this girl if they talked. 

He shook his head slightly. No, he couldn’t be thinking about that. Not today! He was here for cute cats, not cute girls or cute boys. His mind was set firmly on petting all the adorable creatures. 

So he walked past the girl, giving her a faint smile. She returned it with a glowing one that practically lit up her entire face, and Saeyoung had to hide how his heart pattered at the sight. He focused his eyes on a particularly cute orange cat that was napping peacefully in a ray of sunlight.

As he reached out to pet it carefully, the cat responded by purring softly, like this was everything it could have dreamed of. However, after a while it tired of his antics and scratched softly at his hand in warning. He chuckled and pulled his hand away, letting the feline relax by itself. His eyes scanned the room for another willing friend and they snagged on a little black and white kitten.

It was pawing at a toy, obviously bored. Saeyoung crawled over carefully and picked up the toy, which appeared to be a feather on a string. He bounced it around, and the kitten started to paw at it. It got into the game, eventually leaping at it until it tired itself out. 

Saeyoung made a “pspsps” noise, trying to attract the kitten to him. Its ears perked up and it headed over to his lap, where he petted it softly. The cat seemed like just the perfect companion, and if he could adopt a cat right now he would definitely consider this little guy as the one.

There was a quiet intake of breath over his shoulder, and Saeyoung looked back to see the girl gazing fondly at the kitten. As soon as she noticed his gaze, she colored, blushing slightly. “Ah! Sorry to bother you!”

“Oh, it’s not an issue,” he said, giving her a smile. “He’s a cute one, isn’t he?” He gestured to the kitten that had made itself comfortable in his lap. 

“Yes, he really is. I must admit, I may have been looking at him the entire time… but I got a little nervous he wouldn’t like me.” She looked away, seemingly embarrassed. 

“Well,” Saeyoung said, an idea coming to mind. “Let’s test that out, shall we?” With that, he scooped up the feline and plopped him directly in her lap. The cat seemed stunned at first, and Saeyoung worried that he would hiss and claw at the abrupt change. Instead, the cat sniffed at the girl and then settled in again, seemingly unconcerned by what had just happened. 

“Oh,” the girl said, smiling. “He’s lovely.” Her hands went to softly pet him. 

After a few minutes, she looked up. The cat was happily asleep in her lap, purring softly. She spoke again, her voice quiet so as to not disturb the kitten. “I’m sorry, I didn’t introduce myself. I’m Jasmine, but you can call me Jas. It’s good to meet you…”

She trailed off, searching for a name. Saeyoung smiled at her before giving her his fake name. “I’m Luciel. It’s good to meet you as well, Jas. It seems like you’ve got a way with cats, huh?”

“Well, I don’t know about that,” she said with a laugh. “I do love them though. Cats are some of the best animals, in my opinion.”

“You have a top-tier opinion then. I’m inclined to agree!”

“So I take it you’re a cat enthusiast as well, Luciel?”

“Yep,” he said, popping the ‘p’. “I have a friend who has a gorgeous cat and that’s kind of what kickstarted my love for them.”

“Have you ever considered getting one?” She cocked her head, but her hands never left the black and white kitten.

“I’d be lying if I said no. But my job is kind of crazy, and I can honestly say that I don’t think a cat would be good for me right now. Someday soon, hopefully. What about you?”

“I actually came here today hoping to adopt. I’ve been looking for a while but I never found one that I really loved. Well, until today. But I’m still not completely sure…”

“Well the little guy loves you, I can tell that much. And if I’m wrong, which is not very likely, let me tell you, he’s the kind of cat that will always be able to find a new home.” Saeyoung stretched and winked at her.

“Well in that case… I guess I’ll need a name for him, huh?” She looked down with a smile. “Got any good ones?” Jasmine’s heterochromatic eyes twinkled with a hidden glee when Saeyoung’s face lit up. 

“Oh boy, do I! I’ve been saving up all sorts of names for this. Okay, there are the classics, like Fluffy, Batdude, Charles. Oh, and you can’t forget Toast!” His rambling list of (admittedly awful) cat names went on for a long time, leaving Jas halfway to tears with laughter as he continued. When he finally drew his list to a close, both of them had laughed so hard that the kitten had woken up and the employee had poked his head in to make sure that nothing bad was going on.

“Okay, okay,” Saeyoung said once he’d calmed down slightly, “any names catch your fancy?”

“I mean Fuzzbucket was a pretty good idea, but I think I decided on Tama.”

Saeyoung and Jas looked down at the same time to inspect the cat. The black and white kitten released a soft mewl and butted his head at Jas’ hand to request more pets. The two scheming partners in crime looked at each other and smiled. 

“Tama is perfect.” They both said at the same time, then blushed and looked away. Saeyoung swore that when he looked at her cradling the tiny cat next to her chest she seemed to glow with happiness.

Soon enough the time to play with cats was over and the employee was putting the animals back in their cages and thanking them for coming to play with the cats. Jas told him about her interest in adopting Tama, and the employee got her the forms she would need to sign before she could take the kitten home. Saeyoung stayed with her as she filled the forms out, the both of them laughing and chatting the entire time. When all was said and done, Jas hoisted the carrier that held Tama up and exited the building, Saeyoung holding the door for her.

Jas scanned the street, then took a deep breath in, steeling her nerves. “I had a really good time today, Luciel. I was wondering if you’d like to do it again some...time?” She turned around to see the man gone. Her brows furrowed as she swiveled her head to see where he’d gone. “Luciel?”

Saeyoung, who had darted behind a pillar beside the pet store, let out a quiet sigh of disappointment. He gritted his teeth together when he heard Jas whisper sadly to Tama that “he must not have wanted to talk anymore, huh?” 

He leaned his head against the pillar and stayed there until he heard the quiet clip-clop of her shoes walking away. Then he tore himself away from the pillar and walked towards home, hands shoved into his pockets, knowing that he would always remember the girl from the pet shop.

The sounds of music coming from a radio fill the kitchen. A black and white cat races around its owners’ feet as they try to dance. Laughter and pure contentment fill the air as the redhead twirls around the girl with one blue eye and one brown one. 

Years ago, when I was younger, I kinda liked a girl I knew. 

“Do you remember when we first met?” Jas asked, her skirt swinging wildly as Saeyoung spun her enthusiastically.

“How could I forget? That pet shop must be the most magical place on this Earth to me.”

She was mine, and we were sweethearts. That was then, but then it’s true.

“I was so upset when you disappeared, you know. I thought you’d gotten sick of me.”

“I was just as upset, trust me. But I thought I had to, because of the agency. And with Rika and the RFA… it just wasn’t a good time.” Saeyoung shook his head, but then pulled Jas closer to him as they waltzed across the floor.

I’m in love with a fairytale, even though it hurts. Cause I don’t care if I lose my mind, I’m already cursed.

“And then I showed up at Rika’s apartment a few weeks later. Crazy how fate works like that, huh?”

“Oh trust me, I was incredibly surprised to see you appear on the CCTV feed. If my life had a playlist of all the moments where I nearly fell out of my chair, that would definitely be on the top ten list.” 

“I was just as shocked as you were, trust me! I had told myself that I would never see you again, but then there you were!” Jas shook her head. “I had half-convinced myself you were some figment of my imagination.”

Every day we started fighting, but every night we fell in love. No one else could make me sadder, but no one else could lift me high above.

“I feel bad that I tried to push you away while we were both in the apartment. It was hard for me because you were the thing that made me happy and also frustrated me to no end. After all, I was sure I would hurt you.” 

“I wanted to punch you so much, I hope you know. I was at my wit’s end when you finally opened up a little bit!”

“But I did, and look at where we ended up. I opened up, got my brother back, and I got the privilege of having you in my life as my girlfriend and now fiancee.”

“I’m glad that it all worked out because there’s no one else I’d rather spend the rest of my days with.”

“The same goes to you, Jas.”

“I love you, Saeyoung Choi. Bad cat names and all.” Jas said as the music started to slowly die down.

“And I love you, Jasmine Luna, no matter how much time you spend in the bathroom doing your hair.” Saeyoung responded, dipping Jas as she let out a quiet squeal.

The two laughed and continued dancing late into the night, Tama observing from his perch high above.

I’m in love with a fairytale, even though it hurts. Cause I don’t care if I lose my mind, I’m already cursed.

And there’s the fic!! Reminder to check out the awesome @thedum1 for their amazing art!!

[rhysismydaddy]

365 Days: Part 2 (Feysand)

I feel like this should be beyond obvious at this point, but black lives matter. As a white person, I understand that I’ll never fully comprehend the struggle black individuals face on a daily basis. I stand with them, protesters, and activists as a lifetime ally. “Don’t be mad they’re rioting, be happy you don’t have to.” -- If you are not a supporter of the BLM movement, go ahead an unfollow me. I couldn’t care less. 

OKAY. Sorry this is a day late! This part kind of has it all (humor, fluff, some slightly kinky smut) so I don’t know how to describe it. I also hate it, but whatever. Part 3 (last part) out Friday!

Part 1

________________________________________________________________

Day 1, 7:13 AM

~Feyre~

Something warm laid across her cheek, and Feyre peeked an eye open, only to groan at who she saw staring down at her. “If you make a habit of waking me up at the ass crack of dawn, I can already tell you you won’t live through our year of marriage, Rhysand.”

He smiled. “You have to get up. We're taking wedding pictures.”

She didn’t see the point. They’d signed the marriage license last night. How he’d procured one in less than an hour, she didn’t even want to know.

“Why the hell would we do that?”

“Because I’m a public figure, and the newspaper asked for a quote on our marriage.” She groaned. “Now get your cute ass downstairs.”

She glanced at him speculatively but stayed firmly planted in the bed. “What’s downstairs?”

“Someone to help get you ready. Not that I don’t appreciate the bed head. Up.”

Feyre shook her head. “Ask me again in two hours.” She glanced at the clock. “Make it three.”

Her husband pinched the bridge of his nose, but stood back up. She closed her eyes, happy she’d won their first argument. 

Only to be proven wrong a moment later as the demon spawn flung back her blankets, grabbed her waist, and threw her over a shoulder like a sack of potatoes. 

“Put me down,” she shrieked, beating the back of his toned legs with a fist.

Rhysand, calm as always, smoothly responded, “If I put you down, you’ll just get back in the bed.”

“No, I won’t,” she lied.

Even though she couldn’t see his face, she’d bet anything he rolled his eyes. He walked out his/her/their bedroom door and down the stairs, his casual gait suggesting nothing out of the order.

“Good morning,” he said pleasantly to whoever was waiting.

Feyre peeked around his ass to see four complete strangers, varying levels of amusement on their faces. “Um, hi.”

She was placed on a salon-like chair. 

Which was odd, considering they were in the middle of the living room. 

Rhysand pointed at two hulking figures sitting on the couch. “These are my friends Cassian and Azriel. You’ve met.”

The smugness in his voice, combined with the shit-eating grins of the men he was referring to, had her snapping back, “Oh yes, my kidnappers. Sorry I didn’t immediately recognize you. I had a sack over my head last time we met.”

“I’m Cassian.” The larger of the two smiled. “I’m the one you tried to gut with a butter knife.”

“I’ll have to practice my aim.”

Cassian looked at the man standing next to her and winked. “I like her.”

The other man on the couch, Azriel, sighed and shook his head, resigned. 

Rhys just rolled his eyes and continued his introductions. “The two normal people here,” he gestured to a very brightly-dressed pair, “are here to do your hair and makeup and whatever else.”

He gave her a light kiss on the forehead, then spoke to his fellow criminals. “We have shit to do. Come on.”

“Are you off to do illegal activities, my dear husband?” 

“Don’t worry, Feyre darling. You won’t be without eye candy for too long.”

He laughed at the look on her face, then wisely jogged out the door before she could throw something at him.

She turned to the people left staring at her with wide eyes and repressed a groan. “Let’s get this over with.”

~Rhysand~

Two hours after he’d left, Rhys came back to the house, showered, and changed into a tux. Then he went to his backyard where the photographer had set up. 

“Where’s Feyre?” he asked the man as he messed around with lighting balloons.

The photographer gave him a knowing smile. “I want to get a picture of your reaction when you first see her.”

He was about to respond when the backdoor of the house opened and she walked out.

She was wearing a classic gown with long sleeves and a deep neckline, but that wasn’t what drew his attention. Her hair was up, and she had a veil trailing behind her. The sunlight made the white of her dress almost glow.

If she’d been beautiful before, now she was...

There were no words for how she looked.

Fucking radiant was a start.

She walked across the lawn to him and smiled, and he couldn’t keep the matching grin off his face if he tried.

Rhysand heard the faint snap snap snap of the camera and finally understood what the photographer had meant. 

He’d wanted to capture the moment the city’s Son of Satan was practically brought to his knees by a single woman. 

And Rhys didn’t even care.

Feyre finally drew close enough that he could see the details of her face. Even though he had a million more romantic things running through his brain, he murmured, “Who’s the eye candy now?”

“You are,” she said, as if it were obvious. “You look like sex on a spoon.”

His mouth dropped open, but before he could respond, the photographer butted into their moment. “Okay, I want you two to act like I’m not even here. We’re aiming for three or four really good shots, so just be natural, and I’ll let you know if anything has to change.”

They both nodded absently, still staring at each other. Rhys reached down to grab her hand, finger flicking the ring on her finger.

“I can’t believe our marriage is making the paper, and I didn’t even get a real proposal,” she teased. 

It was true. 

He’d put the ring on her bedside table the night before, too much of a simpering coward to give her the ring in person, too nervous about what’d she say. It had been his mother’s, and he’d once sworn to never let another soul have it. 

“I didn’t want to risk your wrath and wake you up.”

She rolled her eyes and smiled.

Almost on its own accord, one of his hands reached out to cup her cheek. He didn’t know if Feyre was acting or something else, but she leaned into his touch, a hand coming to rest against his chest.

“Beautiful, just beautiful,” the photographer cooed.

“You are,” he told his wife. “You’re beautiful.”

She smiled.

“Annoying as hell, but beautiful.”

She shoved his shoulder and turned away, but he grabbed her wrist to spin her back, and decided to risk his life.

He kissed her.

Hands locked around her waist, lips crashing into hers, Rhysand kissed her like he’d been dying to since he’d seen her asleep in his shirt.

And she really, really kissed him back.

Feyre’s hands wound around his neck, and he lifted her up a little to get a better angle. Her lips opened to let his tongue in, and he had no other thoughts in his head besides the woman in his arms.

The photographer coughed pointedly. 

They ignored him.

Until Rhys finally relented and set her back on the ground, both of them panting for air.

“Sorry,” she told the blushing man, but he waved her off and insisted it happened all the time.

The thing was, it didn’t. 

Rhysand had kissed plenty of women in his lifetime, but none of them had made his entire body start simmering like that. 

Her blue eyes watched him speculatively as he slipped the ring off her finger, dropped down to one knee, and smiled. “Feyre darling, will you marry me?”

Despite already being legally married, she bent over and kissed him, then stole the ring back. “I’ll take it into consideration.”

Day 9, 8:04 PM

~Feyre~

Feyre had to admit that while the house outside the city had a charm and wholesome quality she’d come to admire, being trapped here had started to drive her slightly insane. 

Especially since Rhysand had been been on a business trip the entire week, so she’d been here by herself. 

After a tense phone call with her sisters--where Nesta had cackled and called her Satan’s nephew--and getting ahead in her textbooks, she was out of things to do. So she spent most of her time being a nosy little snob and going through her husband’s stuff.

Apparently, the Son of Satan had a very serious addiction to wine, if the cellar in the basement was any indication. 

But other than that--and a mysterious letter from a woman named Amren--he had no trinkets, pictures of family, or any other worthwhile gossip. 

The word “boredom” hardly covered it.

Once upon a time, Feyre wouldn’t have minded a couple days like this. When law school was in session, she didn’t have a spare moment and enjoyed when she got to do nothing. 

She didn’t bother lying to herself about why it was driving her insane now.

She missed Rhysand. 

After only a couple days of marriage, he’d wormed his way into her heart and made her start to rely on teasing him, seeing that devilish smirk, making him laugh. The nightly texts he sent her weren’t enough to satisfy her insane need to talk to him. He’d told her he was coming back later tonight, and she was practically coming out of her skin with excitement. 

She was an idiot, basically. 

This marriage wasn’t supposed to involve actual feelings. It was a publicity save. And despite giving her a hotter-than-hell kiss during their photo shoot, he hadn’t so much as touched her since. 

Feyre had the distinct feeling he was waiting for her to make the first move. 

Which, again, she normally wouldn’t mind. But something about Rhysand... she knew once she started down that path, she wouldn’t be able to stop.

So she slept in his bed, wore his t-shirts, and avoided thinking about how his mouth had felt against hers. 

And how he’d tasted like chocolate and watermelon and-

Cutting that thought off, she resolved herself to be cool and calm and collected when he came back. She needed to nip the feelings she’d started to develop for him in the bud. 

But then the front door banged open, and Feyre instantly disregarded every promise she’d made to herself and raced down the stairs, yelling like a banshee. 

She saw Rhysand standing in the doorway in his usual Johnny Cash uniform and didn’t hesitate before yelling, “You’re home!”

And throwing herself on him.

He dropped whatever he was holding and laughed as she wrapped herself around him like a koala. 

“Are you alright, love?”

She nodded against his neck. “I’m fine. Ignore me. I’ve just been so bored. This place is way too fucking quiet when you’re not here. I think I’m going insane.”

“I believe you.” 

“Asshole.”

He laughed, then did as she’d said and ignored her presence, crossing the living room to the kitchen. 

Rhys bent to look through the fridge, and she tightened her hold on him. 

“We have no food, also,” she told him helpfully. 

“I see that. If you put some pants on, we can go into the city for dinner.”

She laughed. Along with wearing his shirts, she’d taken to stealing a pair of boxers to sleep in. 

Feyre dropped to the floor, and he smirked down at her. “I was gone for five days, and that’s the greeting I got. Next time I’m staying away for six.”

She swung a hand and punched his shoulder, which probably hurt her more than him, and told him, “You’re so very funny, Rhysand. Please feed me.”

Her husband gave her a shooing motion. “You might want to put on something besides my boxers, then.”

She took his advice.

About an hour later, she sat in front of him, watching as he adamantly tried to avoid looking at her.

She’d chosen a dark green dress--unremarkable except for the low neckline and short skirt--black heels, and simple makeup.

“Are you alright, Rhysand? You look like you’re having a stroke.”

Those violet eyes slid to hers. “I’m fine, thank you for asking. I like that dress.”

“I can tell.”

He looked at the ceiling. “When we get home, I’m going to replace your entire wardrobe with burlap sacks.”

Feyre shrugged, then decided to take a chance. “You’d still stare at me.”

His eyes met hers, and when he spoke, it was practically a purr. “Am I supposed to deny, Feyre darling, how attractive I find you?” 

The waiter arrived before she had to respond. She made a mental note to leave him a huge tip.

As they ate their meal, she was overly aware of how many people stared at them. The whispers that surrounded them.

She was about to ask how he dealt with it when a chair was slid up next to her, a heavy-set man settling in. “Hello, Rhysand. I need to talk to you.”

The man was dressed in dark clothes, covered in tattoos, and had the promise of violence written across his every movement. He practically had the words drug dealer floating above his over-sized head. 

“Dante.” The warm look she’d come to recognize in her husband’s eyes was nowhere to be found. “Whatever it is, it can wait. Leave.”

“I promise you, it can’t,” the man said boldly, continuing to ignore her presence entirely. “A shipment’s gone missing.”

Feyre watched, stomach twisting, as Rhysand leaned forward and smiled cruelly. “Would you like to join it? I don’t discuss business in front of my wife.”

My wife. 

Despite the more than tense surroundings, Feyre felt a spark run through her at the words. 

“Then the bitch can leave. I need to talk to you.”

There was a slight pause, then everything changed so quickly she didn’t have time to process it. One minute she was watching the man’s face twist with impatience, the next there was a gun pressed against his ruddy forehead. 

A gun that practically looked like an extension of Rhysand’s arm.

Her husband was standing, entire body stiff with anger. The look on his face was inhuman. And promised a slow, slow death as he looked towards the man on the recieving end. 

“Refer to her as Feyre Asterra, or lose your fucking tongue.” 

The restaurant was dead quiet, everyone holding their breath and waiting to see what happened. No one dared move a muscle. 

Except Dante, who nodded stiffly. 

“Now apologize.”

The way he said it, the command in his voice... a thrill sparked through Feyre, and she bit her lip to keep the gasp in. 

What was wrong with her? Where fear should’ve taken root, there was raw, untapped excitement whirling inside her. Rhysand’s entire body was lined with power and dominance and rage, and it made her breath come quicker as she watched.

Dante looked at her, the hatred clear. “I’m sorry,” he spat, then looked back at Rhys.

Rhysand tilted his head, a king holding court. Another cruel smile. “Beg me.”

Something inside Feyre twisted at his words. 

Beg me.

The man’s jaw flexed as he gritted his teeth, but he still said. “Please, Rhysand. I’ve worked for you for five years. I’m sorry.”

There was a pause, and she wouldn’t be surprised if someone passed out in anticipation. Then Rhys made a soft tsk sound. 

“You no longer work for me. You’re no longer welcome in this city. If I see you after tonight, I won’t be as forgiving.” 

The man opened his mouth to oppose, thought better of it, and sulked to the restaurant of the exit.

In that moment, Feyre knew why people called him the Son of Satan. Knew because, as calm as ever, he turned to their waiter and said, “Check, please.”

~ nsfw warning ~

Rhysand stood in front of the fireplace in their room, silent as the dead. 

He hadn’t said a single word on the way home, and she could tell whatever had happened at dinner had been the tip of the iceberg. Something had gone wrong. 

She replayed the meal over and over in her head, trying to figure it out, but only seemed to be able to remember one thing.

Beg me. 

Something had snapped inside her tonight, and she couldn’t keep herself still. Seeing him like that, seeing the power he had over people...

Slipping off the bed, Feyre walked up behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist. 

Her hands were spread on his taut stomach, but he gripped her wrists and took them off. When he spoke, his voice was rough and low. “I can’t do this right now. I’m not... I’m trying to keep my promise to you.”

Stay good with me. It felt like she’d said that a lifetime ago. 

Rhys turned around, drank whatever was in his glass, and looked down at her. There was violence and anger and animalistic rage in his gaze. 

It did little to calm the roar in her veins.

“Break your promise.”

A muscle in his jaw flickered, but he kept his hands to himself.

She wanted him so bad she could hardly stand. Her hands found their way to his chest, needing to touch him. “Please.”

Suddenly, she was pressed against the mantle near the fire, heat scorching up her leg. His glass fell to the floor as his hands pressed against her shoulders. 

He’d barely touched her, and she was breathing like she’d run a mile. 

A hand came to trace her bottom lip, then he was kissing her, and she finally let out a sigh.

The day of their wedding pictures, his kiss had been decadent and exploring. But that was when he was happy. 

When Rhys was pissed off, he kissed her in a raw, aggressive sort of way that made her lose her mind. A hand pulled her hair, making her tilt her head back, and he deepened the kiss. 

She’d just started to unbutton his shirt when he lifted her by the back of the thighs, then dropped them both to the floor and pinned her underneath him. 

Rhys braced himself over her trapping her arms above her head. She thought about the first time they’d been like this, and the look in his eye said he was doing the exact same thing. 

“I wanted you so bad that night,” he told her, voice rough.

She arched her back, chest pressed against his, and he gave her a wolf’s smile. 

“Did you want me, too?” he asked, lips and teeth on her collarbone. 

Feyre nodded. 

His mouth drifted down to her chest, and his teeth scraped her nipple through her dress. Rhys looked up at her, more monster than man in his eyes, and asked, “Were you wet for me, Feyre?”

Okay. Maybe it had been a mistake to encourage being together right now. 

Only one way to find out.

She nodded again, and his eyes went dark.

A hand remained pinning her wrists, the other drifting up her thigh. His fingers grazed the lace of her panties, then slipped inside. 

He ran a finger up her core, and she shifted beneath him. 

“Stay still,” he ordered, the command in his voice making her freeze. 

His finger slipped inside her, and he nudged the neck of her dress down to take a breast in his mouth. He made a humming sound in appreciation as he moved, then added another finger.

Feyre moaned, pushing uselessly against the grip on her hands. It was too much. He was too much. She wouldn’t survive this.

But she couldn’t force herself to stop. 

She’d been right. Now that she’d started, a shower of bullets wouldn’t make her leave this room.

His stubble scraped the valley between her breasts, and then they were kissing, a deep, wet slide of tongues and lips and teeth. He kissed her in time to the movement of his hand, and Feyre groaned into his mouth.

“I need more,” she panted onto his skin.

Rhysand’s teeth closed softly on her shoulder, and then he was looking down at her. His eyes were so dark they were like the nighttime sky, and then he said the words she didn’t know she’d been craving. 

“Beg me.”

She whimpered underneath him, shifting restlessly. 

A small, knowing smile was on his face, and she would’ve punched it off if she hadn’t been so attracted to it. 

“Please. Please.”

His hand was on her jaw, and he pressed a wet kiss to her lips. “Good girl.”

Lord help me.

He made quick work pulling her clothes off, then leaned back on his knees, surveying her head to toe. 

She repaid the favor. 

She didn’t know when his shirt had fallen open, but she sure as shit wasn’t complaining. 

His chest was covered in tattoos, the dark swirls running across his pecs and shoulders, all the way to his fingertips. The tattoos, the dangerous look in his eyes... Feyre lost a bit of her sanity as she leaned up to drag her mouth up his stomach.

Flicking open his belt, Rhys pushed her back down. Then his pants were pulled down, and he was spreading her thighs and settling in between them before she got a proper look. 

“Again.” He looked half crazed with anger and lust. 

She nipped at his bottom lip. “Please.”

He was pushed inside her, deep and slow and steady. He groaned in her ear, and the sound threatened what remained of her.

Then he gripped her hips, lifted slightly, and began to move. 

Holy gods.

Feyre didn’t know what language she was speaking in, but it wasn’t English. She was murmuring incoherent somethings, not able to string together proper thoughts.

She moved in rhythm with him as he picked up speed, and even though they were spread out on the ground, Feyre felt like a freaking queen. 

He was taking his time, listening and learning what she liked, and she could feel herself getting closer and closer to the edge.

Soon she was so loud it was a miracle they didn’t have close neighbors. 

But as soon as she felt release start to come, he paused his movements. 

The sound that came out of Feyre’s mouth was close to a snarl. 

Rhysand smiled, gripping her chin. “Do you want to come, Feyre darling?”

If she wasn’t practically immobile, she’d strangle him. “You’re such an insufferable bastard, Rhysand Asterra. Yes.”

“And what do people say when they want something?”

She bit his lip in frustration, but said, “Please, you pri-”

His hips slammed into hers, a moan cutting her off as release crashed into her. Muscles twitching, face pinched in concentration, he followed her lead, collapsing on top of her. 

They laid there together, both breathing heavily, until she started losing air. He rolled off her and looked over her with male satisfaction.

There was still a little tension from earlier, but his usual brightness and light was back. It was impossible not to smile at the happiness coursing through her veins. 

Then he opened that smart mouth. “Let’s take a moment to remember when you said you could go two years without sleeping with me.”

“In my defense,” she panted back, “I hadn’t seen you in action before.”

He looked adorably shocked. “So threatening to shoot people is hot to you?”

“When it’s because of me, yeah.” She flicked his bicep, unable to help it. “I almost jumped you right then and there.”

He started kissing her neck, grinning against her skin. “I might have to hunt him down, then.”

She laughed, hands playing in his thick hair. Feyre pulled him back on top of her, a deliciously heavy dead weight. “I think I might have to update my pros and cons list.”

Rhysand laughed, and Feyre doubted a year of looking at that smile would be enough. 

Hell, a lifetime might not be enough. 

She didn’t let the thought linger. 

“Do you think there’s some innocent people around for you to threaten?”

A kiss to her temple. “I’ll hire someone if I have to.”

________________________________________________________________

Part 3

@a-bit-of-a-cactus @bamchickawowow @aesthetics-11 @b00kworm @sleeping-and-books @rapunzel1523 @negativenesta @burritowithfeels @exciting @sis-it-dont-add-up @mockingjayusa @aelin-is-my-heart @aelinfeyreeleven945tbln @awesomelena555 @thekeytohappiness-is-you @keshavomit

[whumpinggrounds]

Febuwhump Day 9: “I Can’t Lose You, Too”

doing a substitution for today cuz i just wasn’t really able to work with buried alive so here goes :) more backstory for the story that (almost) no one is reading but I Don’t Care Because I Like It

CW: mentions of pet whump, mentions of institutionalized dehumanization

By the time Mara gets back to her apartment, she’s in a bad way. She’s already called Violet, her closest friend in this city, because she knows she shouldn’t be alone right now, but she couldn’t get the story out, just sobbed garbled words into the phone. Even breaking the speed limit, Violet can’t come fast enough. When Mara shuts her eyes, she sees Jude’s tear-streaked face. In the silent elevator, Jude’s screams are ringing in her ears. It’s twenty minutes before Violet knocks on her door, and by then Mara’s in a state – pacing around her apartment like a caged animal, tears running down her face, on the verge of tearing out her hair.

Violet is hardly in the door before Mara starts talking. “It’s Jude,” she chokes out, and she can’t help noticing the way her friend’s face falls, just a little.

“Your ex, Jude?” That’s just like good old Violet, careful to sound appropriately concerned instead of disappointed. Good, because Mara doesn’t have the time or energy or ability to think about Violet’s feelings right now.

“She’s – she’s – Vi, she’s a trainee at WRU. At my…she…I saw her at work today, Vi, they’re, she, they have her.”

The horror in Violet’s face validates all the fear Mara is feeling in the worst of ways. “Oh my god.”

Nodding, Mara screws her face up against the oncoming tide, but her resolve doesn’t last. She flings herself forward, wrapping her arms around the diminutive girl in her kitchen, making Violet take a step back. Before she was weeping, now Mara sobs. “What do I doooo?” she wails into Violet’s bouncy black hair. “What can I do?”

Gentle as she can, Violet guides them both over to the couch, sits Mara down so she can properly fling herself into Violet’s arms. “I’m so sorry, Mara,” she says, and underneath her hands, Mara’s shoulders hitch almost violently. “I’m so, so sorry.”

For a few minutes, the only sound is Mara’s snuffling as she desperately tries to control herself. “There must be some way I can help,” she finally manages. “Some way I can, can get to her, or get her out, or, or, or…” She looks up at Violet beseechingly, but Violet won’t meet her eyes. Instead, her friend brushes Mara’s hair away from her face, rubs a firm hand along her spine. The contact is soothing, but Mara doesn’t want soothing. She wants something to do.

Stubborn, she prods at Violet. “C’mon, Vi.” Her voice is shaky, wet. “C-come on, do you think…do you think we could get some of the locals on it? B-break her out of the facility, maybe? Or, um, or-”

She gets no reply, just Violet avoiding her desperate eyes. “Seriously, Violet. What…who can I call? Who should I call? I need to call someone.” Mara pushes herself off the couch, off Violet’s lap, and into action. Now that the initial wave of panic is past, now that she’s sobbed and hyperventilated and there’s someone here to help, a kind of manic energy overtakes Mara. “Let’s, okay, so maybe Simon will help – he likes me, at least, and he has space in his safehouse. And I know Louise doesn’t like me but maybe she’d do it for a Box Babe-”

“Mara, I really think you should sit down and focus on breathing.”

“I’m breathing fine Violet, let’s, um, okay, so maybe we can call some of my old college contacts and figure out some sort of, some way to get to her, and they’ve only just started on her so-so-so-”

Mara makes the mistake of looking back at Violet, and Vi’s brown eyes are filled to the brim with long-suffering patience, and a little bit of pain, and something that looks too much like pity. Growling, Mara backs away from her. “Don’t look at me like that, Vi. Don’t-don’t-don’t-”

“You don’t,” Violet counters, firm as ever. She glances down at her lap, as if gathering her resolve, and then tips her chin up and meets Mara’s eyes with steady surety. “Don’t do this to yourself, Mara. You know better than this.”

“Don’t do what? I know better than what?”

Pursing her lips, Violet regards Mara for a long, tense moment. “Don’t…think that you can help.” The words are delivered softly, but Mara staggers back as if she’s been struck.

“I-what-how could you – I can help!” Mara’s not shouting, but with the tone in her voice she might as well be. “We can help – we know people, you know people, I, I’m not just going to give up, Violet-”

“Mara, sit down.”

“No! I’m not just going to, to write her off! I won’t do it! Just because you’re scared-”

“Mara, please sit down.”

“No! No, Violet, I’m not going to sit down and I’m not going to give up and I’m not going to listen to you tell me why there’s nothing I can do-”

“Mara, I said sit down.” Violet’s voice doesn’t grow louder, and it doesn’t grow angrier, but she’s staring Mara down with a steady, serious look that Mara can’t keep running from. Glaring fit to kill, Mara throws herself down on the couch, arms folded across her chest. Looking into her furious face, Violet heaves a sigh and rubs a hand against her temple. She looks sad. She looks exhausted. A better person would reach for her, but Mara’s too stubborn, and far, far too angry.  

“I don’t think I’ve ever told you how I got into lib.” Violet’s voice is quiet, calm.

Snorting, Mara rolls her eyes skyward and directs her question to the ceiling. “Is that really relevant right now?”

“Yeah. I think it is.” Violet takes a breath, presses her palms down flat against the tops of her thighs. “I was, um, fifteen. My cousin signed up. To be a pet.”

Mara swallows. Suddenly it’s a lot harder to glare at Violet. “Oh.”

“Yeah. He struggled with a lot of things. Mental health stuff, and debt, and some bad choices. I don’t know. He…he probably did it voluntarily. I guess I’ll never know.”

Nodding, Mara twists her hands in her lap, feeling subdued, newly stunned. “Were you…um, close?”

Violet smiles just a little. “We were, sort of. More so when we were little. He was older, and cool. I idolized him.”

“Vi, I’m so sorry.”

“Me too, Mara. And I’m really, really sorry for you, and for Jude.” Her voice grows serious, and she draws in another deep breath. “I’m telling you because I went through it, and I saw my family go through it, and I need you to understand.” Dread building, Mara waits.

“I know you love Jude. I know you miss her. I know you can’t imagine this happening to her.” Violet swallows and says the words as clearly as she can. “And she belongs to WRU now.”

“But-”

“No buts. Maybe it wasn’t done legitimately. Probably it wasn’t done legitimately. But it was done. Is done. Is being done…” Violet swallows again. “Is being done right now. And I know it sucks to hear, but I’m going to tell you anyway, because it’s true. There is nothing you can do about it.”

“But, but Violet, come on-”

“I’m being straight with you because you need to hear it. There is nothing you can do.” Her voice is calm, methodical, unassailable. “That’s not how pet lib works. We don’t do break ins. We don’t rescue people. We have a hard enough time caring for the rescues we can find.” Mara’s face is cracking into simple desperate misery, and still, when Violet pauses to take a breath, Mara’s obstinacy rears its familiar head.

“I’m going to do something, Vi. I have to do something.”

“Mara, please listen to me. I know what I’m talking about. I saw my cousin’s family fall apart after he signed up. His dad left. His mom got addicted to prescription painkillers. His little sister…” Violet’s voice fades out, and she heaves in air and forces herself to finish the sentence. “His little sister signed up too. One week after she turned eighteen. I think…I think she thought it would make her feel close to him. She was a year younger than me. I didn’t even know she was thinking about it until…until after it was done.”

“Jesus,” Mara breathes. “Jesus, Violet, I’m so sorry.”

“Me too!” Violet shakes her head. The tears make shining tracks down her stricken face. “Me too. But listen to me Mara, please, really, listen. I’m telling you this because I learned it better and harder than most people. This business eats people alive. WRU does, we all know that, but so does lib. It grinds you down and wears you out and you lose people, Mar. You do.” One of them sniffles, and by now it’s hard to tell who. “You lose people all kinds of ways. Yeah, this is one of the worst. But…you can’t…you can’t throw yourself after them because it hurts that they’re gone. If you try to interfere, if you try to stop this or somehow save Jude, that’s all you’re doing. Throwing yourself after her.”

“But…but I…I can’t just do nothing, Violet. I can’t…”

“There are people who don’t get a choice,” Violet tells Mara, looking into her face, unashamed of the tears. “There are people who don’t have a choice in getting lost. You have a choice. It’s not a choice between helping and doing nothing. It’s a choice between losing someone you love, and losing her and yourself, too. I…” Finally, Violet drops her gaze, looks into her lap. “Look, you’re…important to me, Mara. You’re important to a lot of people. I’m asking you…I’m asking you not to do this. Not to throw yourself after someone. I’ve lost people that way. I can’t lose you, too.”

“But…but…” Mara’s voice comes out thready, high and needy. “But Violet, I can help her. I can. I know I can.”

Violet nods, putting an arm around Mara’s shoulders. The other woman leans into her gratefully. “No,” she tells Mara softly. “You can’t.” Her friend shudders at the finality of her words, but for the first time since Violet arrived, she doesn’t argue.

[bobfloydssunnies]

would you believe me if i said it originally was supposed to be happy but then about halfway through i changed it 

A Feeling

Pairing: Poe Dameron x Reader

Rating: PG nothing crazy just a little sadness I guess 

Summary: What if Poe was force sensitive or could use the force but only told a few people 

Word Count: 2.6k

Note: This is my first work for Poe (please be kind). I don’t know if I really love this also idk if i like how i write but I’m trying to keep everything gender neutral so no one feels left out also this came out a lot longer than I originally planned 

It started with the force tree that was planted in the backyard of his house when he was young; he just remembers being drawn to it, which turned into his parents explaining what that meant. He was young at the time and didn’t fully understand what it meant, but his mom told him it means he’s special and that once he’s older, he can learn how to use it and use it for good. He remembers Leia or Luke being around for a while and teaching him a few little things when they’d come to visit his parents. But once Ben came along and once Luke started his Jedi academy, the visits slowed before stopping altogether. So Poe took to learning alone and trying to remember things he had seen Luke and Leia do or even talk about so he could at least understand and use the gift he has. Around the time Poe turned 10 or 11, he remembers his dad asking him if he wanted to go off to train with Luke, which he said no to not wanting to leave his dad alone after just losing his mom a few years before. 

So as Poe entered his teen years, he stopped practicing anything related to using the force and focused on flying, knowing he wanted to be a pilot like his mom was. Once he could, he went off and joined the new republic navy, worked hard, and became a commander and found bb8 along the way. But as Poe was raising ranks in the navy, the first order was rising to power as well. At this time, Leia reached out to Poe, asking him to come and join the resistance. He said yes, knowing it was what his mom would have done, so he left the navy and headed off to help save the galaxy and make his mom proud. 

Once with the resistance, Poe quickly became the “poster boy” as well as the one Leia trusted the most for solo missions. Of course, no one within the resistance beside Leia and bb8 knew Poe was force sensitive and could use the force to an extent because if too many people know it becomes dangerous because you can never know who to trust in the time like this.  While out on missions, especially with others, Poe tries not to rely too much on the force, but sometimes it’s hard to avoid the pull when he can feel it tug him away from danger or warn him before something happens, and he can prevent it. There are times where he can feel it calling out to him and helping him along the way. Poe won’t lie and say it’s not great for little mind tricks every once in a while or moving objects when need be. But like with every good thing, there’s always a downside which Poe tries to make sure it doesn’t get to him but, it’s hard sometimes because it’s not always something he can see coming no matter how many times it happens. The worst thing is that once you are connected to someone in any way and gain a connection with them through the force, you can feel them, which means losing that person hurts a lot more.

  “I felt it you know” he had said randomly while the two of you were laying in bed one night “felt what?” you asked confused by his sudden outburst “the day my mom died I felt it,” he said quieter, you sat up watching his face you could see the range of emotions he was going through “Oh Poe I’m sorry,” you said grabbing his hand, you could see his eyes start to get glossy “ I - I just miss her so much sometimes and like I can’t forget what it felt like when it happened,” he said holding back tears “Poe, babe I can’t imagine having to go through that, and I will never know the pain you went through,” you tell him trying to soothe him the best you can “ I just want to make her proud but it’s so hard to feel so together all the time when I can feel so much” he said rubbing his eyes “Poe no one is excepting you to always have it together” you tell him pulling him towards you, you running your hands through is hair lightly scratching his scalp trying to calm him down “But Leia needs me to do all this stuff and I can’t let the squadron down” he mumbles into your neck “Baby no one is expecting you to always be so put together you also don’t have to suffer alone I’m always here for you and you know beebs will listen to you too” you say into his hair because pressing a kiss to his tempt, you hear him sigh “I know but” “no buts we are here for you no matter what” you say cuttting him off, he moves so that his forehead is resting on your should “i love you” he whispers “ i love you too flyboy” you say back quietly this a smile on your face. 

The First Order had pulled a final play Palpatine was back no one knew how but he was back and the first order spy said you had 16 hours to figure out how to stop him before the Final Order would rise. Rey decided this meant she was to figure without alone because she felt it was her job to finish what Luke started but she forgot how stubborn her friends could be which is how you, Poe, Finn, Chewie, BB8 and Rey all ended up on the Falcon together going off to search for a wayfinder. 

Things were not going well. Each planet brought a new problem and also fixed a previous on all at the same time.

On Pasaana, after thinking it would be easy, you were chased by stormtroopers. Rey and Ren faced off after Chewie was put onto a transport ship that Rey then destroyed. You also all realized the only way to get the information out of C3PO was to find someone to break into his system and bypass the block set in place. Then on Kimiji, you were brought you face to face with some old friends of Poe’s that seemed to have it out for him. C3PO losing all his memories as a result of us bypassing the block because he knew it was the right thing to do to help his friends. Then Ren finding us again, but Rey sensing Chewie was still alive and on the destroyer Ren brought. 

Getting into the destroyer was easy. Poe’s “friend” had given him a medallion that would give him the clearance to board the ship and allow us to come in and rescue Chewie. Once running the halls, Rey stopped and said she would find the blade leaving you, Poe and Finn to find Chewie. It was going all well and smooth till Poe got grazed by a blaster shot coming around a corner. Soon surrounded by stormtroopers and cuffed, you were lead to some general, and he gave the orders to execute you all. Hux was told to see to it along with four stormtroopers; you were lead to a room “I’m sorry” Poe said looking over at you “For what” you asked him “Bringing you along” he said “Poe you wouldn’t have been able to stop me” I told him. Your backs where to Hux and the troopers when you heard Hux say he wanted to do it himself, and you could hear him take the gun from whichever trooper handed it to him, and you braced yourself. The first shot came quickly, followed by three more, but you all realized you were still standing. Turning around you saw all the troopers on the ground “I’m the spy” Hux quickly spit out “I knew it” Poe said “No you didn’t” Finn said “Why” You asked “I don’t care if you win I want to see Ren lose” he said as he quickly released your binders. He led you to the Falcon and then said one of you needed to shoot him in the arm, Finn shot him in the leg instead as you, Poe and Chewie ran to the ship.  As quickly as you could, you got the ship ready and waited for Rey. 

Crash landing wasn’t the best, but the landing gear was shot, and you had no other choice. You were met by locals who lived on the planet after Rey pointed out where on the wreck of the death star she needed to get to in order to retrieve the other wayfinder. Jannah, you later learned, was extremely helpful when it came to fixing up ships, and Finn and her seemed to have a connection. You heard beebee roll in “what do you mean you haven’t seen her” you heard Poe say before running out of the falcon with Finn and Jannah quickly behind them; you followed only to catch the end of the conversation that Rey had taken a skimmer out onto the rough water. You could hear Poe and Finn arguing, “well, I’m not Leia” you heard Poe spit out, “That’s for damn sure” Finn spit back before stalking past you. beebee beeped next to you. “You do help them on the falcon; I’ll take care of Poe, buddy,” you tell him. You walked down the hill, some to where Poe was sitting. “Hey,” you say, “Come to yell at me too,” he asked, “No, I came to see if you’re alright, jerk” You speak with a slight grin “Sorry,” he apologized. “Hey it’s okay we are all running a little thin and the time deadline isn’t helping maybe we sit here for a minute and cool down,” you tell him “We gotta fix the falcon,” he says “Alright then let’s go do that,” you say holding your hand out to him. 

Finn and Jannah set out across the water and slowly got smaller in the distance, and the rest of you set to work fixing the falcon or at least getting it flyable. Its been some time of you all quietly working and the only noises coming from tools, bb8 and d-o or the occasional grunt from Chewie or Poe. You had stopped for a moment and looked over to Poe just to see how he was doing when suddenly you could see a change on his face something happened. He felt it and whatever it was it hurt you could see the tears building up in his eyes “Poe you okay” you asked, he looked up and gave a weak smile before wiping his eyes “Um yeah I’m fine” he said quietly before turning back around to continue what he was working on.  You couldn’t figure out the best time to ask Poe what had happened because you also didn’t know if he wanted to talk about it. Finn and Jannah returned after a while with the news that had found Rey, but she was fighting Ren. 

Once the Falcon was back up and running as a group, you decided to leave Rey, but with a promise from Jannah if she needs them to come back to contact you guys. Shortly after taking off, you had convinced Poe you needed his help with a repair you could do while flying “Poe what happened earlier” you asked him, “What the argument with Finn, that was nothing” he said. “No Poe, that’s not what I mean; I mean, what did you feel earlier while we were working on repairs,” you asked, “Um, it’s nothing,” he said, trying to move away from you. You grabbed his hand holding him in place “It wasn’t nothing I saw the tears Poe just let me be here for you,” you say taking your free hand to move the curl that was covering his eyes “It’s Leia” he whispers, your heart dropped you knew what he meant “She…” “Yeah, I think she did it to help Rey, but I don’t know but kriff it hurts” he chokes out, he pulled you into his chest you could feel the tears land on your head, but you just kept holding onto him and rubbing his back “It’s like I lost my mom all over again” he mumbled into your hair “I’m sorry, I wish I could make it better,” you tell him “This helps you being here helps I’m sorry for not saying anything earlier,” he says “Poe I don’t expect you to tell me everything right away especially when it’s something like this and it hurts as much as this does but, I want you to know I’m always here for you no matter what,” you tell him 

Arriving back on base was hard knowing what you were walking into; you grabbed Poe’s hand as you both followed after Finn. “We need to talk to Leia,” Finn said, walking the familiar path to where she and Rose usually were. You could feel Poe tense up and make a small noise, “What” Finn asked, turning around looking at Poe. Poe opened his mouth to speak when you heard Rose yell in the distance “There you guys are it’s Leia something happened” She says as she gets closer “Maz is pretty sure what she’s done, but she wants to talk to Poe first” Rose said leading you back to command central. You felt Poe squeeze your hand like it was trying to make sure you were real. “Poe, you should know Leia made you the acting general,” Rose said as Poe pulled you along with him to where he knows Maz is, “Alright um when I get back we’ll talk more,” he said trying to keep his emotions in check. 

You soon found yourself outside the room you knew Maz and Leia were in, Poe took a deep breath “I can wait out here if you want I don’t want to invade on this” you tell him hanging back a little. “Please don’t,” he whispered, holding your hand tighter “Okay,” you reply softly; you let him lead you in the room. Maz was standing there waiting, Leia laying on the bed covered in a sheet you felt tears threaten to spill over, and Poe’s grip on your hand got a little tighter. “I know what you felt Poe and I think you know why she did it” Maz spoke, Poe nodded “She still believes in him, and I know it’s hard for any of us to understand why but this is her wish” Maz continued, Poe sat down next to Leia pulling you with him. He let go of your hand and held his hands in front of his face. “I don’t know how to do any of this,” he spoke. “How am I supposed just to take over the whole resistance and know how to handle it all?” he continued. “None of us knew what we were doing,” a new voice said, looking over you saw Lando come into the room “Luke Han Leia none of us knew what we were doing, but we knew people believed and that if we had them, then we could do it.” he continued, Poe looked over at him. Lando gave him a soft smile “She believed in you to take over it’s time to believe in yourself.” Lando said before disappearing again. Poe sat there silent with tears running down his face “whatever you decide to do, I’ll be right beside you flyboy,” you said before grabbing his hair again and squeezing it.  

permanent taglist:  @poesflygirl​ 

[louloubabys1992]

Ask for writers

Tagged by @theisolatedlily​ thank u babe xoxo

1. describe how you first started writing and when you first posted: 

I got so into the 1D fandom that I opened a tumblr account and found loads of fics about Harry and Louis. I got hooked. I go way back as a fan. am one of those who started reading fics from tumblr accounts and livejournals. I know a lot still read from those until now, even me, until ao3 became the basis of fics. I read so many fics that i wanted to write my own as well. my first ever fic, officially, was an apocalypse/zombie au called Nothing Can Come Between You and I. I say officially because I posted a couple of fics before this one but they were edited fics from a writer who took down his/her fics for reasons I don’t wanna get into. I asked permission to post them and edit them. That’s when I started joining up as a beta as well :D

2. which of your characters do you typically resonate most closely with? do you base any characters off of yourself?

I typically write in Louis’ narrative but I don’t usually base it on any perceptions I have of him, even if it’s canon. most of my fics are inspired by circumstances I see around me in my day to day life or by events that one can relate to because they do happen.

3. where do you often find inspiration?

I read a lot of fics as I’ve mentioned before and each and every one of them has left an impact on me that made me the fic writer I am today. Whenever I lack inspiration, I just open my bookmarks on ao3 and read. And then, a bulb lights up and voila, inspiration hits

4. has quarantine helped or hindered your writing process?

helped a lot! i wrote more during quarantine than I do now even though am somewhat working from home. but when corona was at its peak back in March, everything was on hold and I turned to writing.

5. do you listen to music/noise while you write or do you prefer silence? 

silence. Am sadly not one of those people who could write in a corner in a cafe even though I wish I could do something like that.

6. what is your biggest writing pet peeve in your writing or in general?

word vomit. not into that.

7. describe your ideal writing setup: 

after midnight, laptop on a cushion on my lap, neck pillow for my neck, my bed, and a quiet house where everyone is already sleeping and my mind is brimming, racing faster than my fingers could type hahahaah

8. favorite time of day to write?: 

after midnight. it mostly has to do with the fact that I am not available during the day but even before when I wasn’t working, i would find myself procrastinating all day or totally lacking inspiration and then come night time, and my mind comes alive hahahaha

9. favorite genre to write + one you’d like to try writing in the future?

Canon fics

10. do you struggle with writer’s block? 

I mean, who doesn’t, right?

11. what is the easiest part of your writing process and the most difficult? 

easiest is after I’ve day-dreamed the scene because when I day dream, its detailed to the tee, down to the words and the dialogue but the most difficult is when I postpone an idea I had in my head. If I don’t write it down instantly, it never turns out the same and that’s quite frustrating

12. how do you come up with original characters? (

I do insert a lot of original characters in my fics and they are sometimes inspired my real people but only in terms of appearance not by character or name. so, if am describing an original character in any of my fics, know that he exists but his character is not the same in real life hahahaha

13. what is your favorite and least favorite word? f

wow, this is random. um. fav would be scars and least would be veggies

14. what is one thing about your writing that you’re really proud of and one thing you hope to continue working at?

I don’t think it was something I was proud of at first but a lot of people who comment on my fics say that they like my pacing and the dialogues. so maybe that? I would say I think I need to work more on my originality. sometimes, i find myself drifting to a fic I’ve just read, especially if its the same trope and am like, wow, that’s not mine at all.

15. what work of yours has your favorite ‘verse/world building? how did you come up with it?

definitely my first abo fic Hang there like fruit, my soul/Till the tree die. I love that au and I’ve always wanted to put my own tiny twist in it. am really proud of how it came about and am massively humbled by the comments and support it received :D

16. what font and size do you write in? single spaced or double?

arial, font 18 and sometimes bigger because I don’t have good eyesight

17. what is a typo(s) you find yourself making consistently?:

names, because sometimes the names I choose are apprarently just not cool with microsoft word for some reason....sighs

18. (if applicable) do you separate fic writing from fandom?

yes, but its not intentional, it just happens

19. what emotion is your favorite to write? which is the most difficult?Angst because that’s just me hahahaaha. the most difficult? hmm, emotional love confessions maybe or the transition from friends to lovers. yeah.

20. what is one thing you hope readers always take away from your works?

the passion behind it maybe?

21. what is the best and worst writing advice you’ve ever received?

best advice is to sleep on it because I do come up with scenes for my fics when I am about to sleep ahahahah. the worse one I got came from someone who obviously doesn’t know a thing about writing. he said, ‘’just don’t write it and do something else.’’ I mean, really?

22. which one of your works would you most want to see turned into a film/television show?

nope, not happening.

23. do you write scenes chronologically or out of order?: 

most of the time in order.

24. how do you handle criticism?

quite well I think. 

 25. what is the advice you would give to someone who is looking to start writing?

Go for it. Writing is not a silly hobby. if it’s really something you wanna do, even if its just for fun or to pass the time or to make new friends. go for it, There are so many fics in this fandom that until this day, are still ingrained in my mind because they were so touching and moving to me. you never know what your words could do for someone or how much your words could make a person’s day a better day 

26. what kind of feedback on your work always makes your day?

the comments posted on my fics in ao3 always make me happy. I feel like its the best to find out if my work is worth someone’s time, you know? even though I do write for myself most of the time, the validation is nice sometimes :D

27. which fic ‘verse of your own would you most like to exist in? which fic’s characters would you most like to befriend? 

wow, all of them? 

28. what do you always enjoy getting asks about/wish people would ask about more?

hmm, I mean people could ask what they want so am cool with anything. am not picky. I get asked about plot lines or what would happen next when it comes to cliffhangers and I do my best to answer them without revealing too much :D

29. what has writing added to your life? how has it changed you?

I definitely made new friends through it and it’s been great :D

30. why do you write?

it’s my favourite thing in my entire life. It’s the one thing that no one in my life knows about, as in the people that I work with, my friends, even my family, none of them have ever read anything I’ve ever written and am fine with it. I feel like writing is purely for me and it’s something I’d like to keep as a part of me you know?

boost yourself + tags!

1a. share the last sentence you wrote:

Harry smiles despite himself. Three years together, since he was nineteen, and it shouldn’t be a surprise that Louis knows him so well, can tell by the sound of his voice if he’s okay or not, nervous or not, happy or not.

2a. describe the wip you’re most excited about:

the one am writing for the harry/men fic fest

3a. share the piece of dialogue from one of your works you’re most proud of: 

‘’You’re being really quiet and I don’t like it,’’ Louis points out.

‘’Just a bit tired,’’

‘’Stay here then,’’ Louis pats the bed. ‘’Sleep next to me,’’

‘’Are you sure? I don’t want to mess with anything by accident or…’’

‘’Harry?’’

‘’What?’’

‘’I won’t get a wink’s worth of sleep if you’re even an inch away from me,’’ he says firmly. ‘’And I’ll go on a limb here and say neither will you.’’

‘’But…’’

‘’No buts, I’m serious.’’ Louis cups his cheek, his blue eyes big and beautiful, like an entire fucking galaxy. ‘’I missed you something terrible these past few days,’’

‘’Lou…’’

‘’Be here with me, Haz. Please?’’

Harry hums before he pushes himself forward. He cannot stop it, cannot keep himself from gravitating towards Louis, taking what he wants, what he needs to make it through the night. He cups Louis’ face and kisses him but even then it’s not enough and he skates one arm around Louis’ small shoulders and tugs him closer, careful not to jostle Louis too much and kisses him like Louis’ a mermaid and he needs his air or else he’ll drown.

It eases an ache in him he didn’t know was trying to get his attention the moment he entered the room, something deep and visceral, calming down with the way Louis’ molds his lips against his, with the shape of his mouth fitting with his own, with the way his body is trying to align with his, like a constellation, each star coming together to mean something greater than they can ever grasp, something more infinite and vast.

‘’I love you,’’ Louis whispers into his lips.

‘’I’m never letting you go,’’ Harry says before he reaches for another kiss. ‘’Love of my life, fucking best thing to ever happen to me, you know that?’’

‘’My rock,’’ Louis kisses him back. ‘’My fortress,’’ and kisses him again, ‘’my strength,’’ and again and again. ‘’I love you so much. Would be dead without you,’’

‘’Don’t say that,’’

‘’It’s true,’’ Louis gasps as Harry devours his mouth, trying to stop him from saying another word. ‘’I would’ve crawled out that room right to your feet, Haz. I would’ve…’’

‘’Shh, just me kiss, babe. Just kiss me,’’ Harry pleads.

And so they do.

4a; line from my fics that I am most proud of:

hard to choose really

5a. link the last fic you read: 

bang bang (my baby shot me down) by thepolourryexpress

6a. link the last work you published: 

Ellen's haunted house by louloubaby92

7a. link to your ao3 (if applicable): 

https://archiveofourown.org/users/louloubaby92/works

8a. someone that inspires you 

Louis Tomlinson

9a. a comfort fic/work that you’ve been grateful for this year: 

bruise you like a peach by falsegoodnight

10a. other writers that you’d like to tag! 

@falsegoodnight​ @twopoppies​ @mediawhorefics​

[dammitadolfnomorecake]

Once Bitten, Twice Stupid 119

119

   Lance was sleeping in the car as Keith parked in front of the bookshop where Colleen was waiting with Coran, who’d brought a wheelchair up. Keith was glad the drive back was over. Matt and Pidge were exhausting. Snacks were scattered through Lance’s bronco, despite him scolding them to stop throwing food at each other. Matt helped Pidge out and into the wheelchair, Kosmo inviting himself to follow them out

“You guys go ahead, I’m going to wake Lance up”

Coran nodded, preoccupied with Kosmo. Colleen taking control of the wheelchair, Pidge calling out “remember me how I used to be” as she was wheeled towards the bookshop. Folding his seat down, Keith didn’t want to disturb Lance. His boyfriend deserved his sleep, buuuuut, the vomiting had him worried and he wanted Coran to check Lance out as soon as possible.

  Climbing into the backseat, he undid Lance’s belt, Lance stirring at the belt sliding back into its holder

“Hey, you”

Smiling at him sleepily, Lance still didn’t look well

“Hey yourself, Mullet. We there?”

“Yeah, babe. Here in one piece”

“Mmm, good job, babe”

“You okay?”

“Just tired... I’ll be okay”

Keith wanted to believe him. Having seen Lance throw up more than once did nothing to give him confidence. He’d nearly lost it at Pidge when she’d elbowed Lance

“We’re heading down to Coran’s office. Let’s get you out the car”

“I’m sorry... I really don’t want to move”

“I know but you wanted to see Coran. Let’s get you checked out then I’ll take you home”

“Alright... I’m too exhausted to even argue back”

   Keith kept his arm around his stumbling boyfriend. Lance kept yawning, his head against Keith’s shoulder. Keith had no idea if this was normal or if Lance was lacking in blood. He was surely dehydrated, Keith worried that’d affect their baby, not just his precious boyfriend. The holiday had been relaxing, a little up and down, but very much needed and appreciated. He still had to question how Hunk had found out, but that was a job for later. Lance seemed happier for Hunk knowing, Keith a tad jealous that Lance had sought comfort from Hunk than him, yet extremely grateful Hunk had accepted their news without making Lance feel too insecure to talk to him.

   Pidge was up on Coran’s examination bed when they got there, hovering in the doorway. Colleen scolding her daughter, while Pidge’s face burnt with embarrassment. She looked ready to turn on them, Coran trying his best to calm everyone down, though he seemed slightly scared of Colleen. Keith was ashamed to admit that he wished Coran would assign someone else to Pidge so Lance could be checked over. He loved Pidge, but she wasn’t carrying his baby

“Boys, if you want to take a seat, I’ll be with you shortly. Colleen, perhaps you’d like to hold Pidge’s hand. Pidge, you’ll be right as rain in tickety-boo”

  “Shortly” was too long. He was a horrible friend. What he actually wanted was two Coran’s, or a magical time machine that’d speed up hearing Pidge was going to be okay. Her knee and ankle were both swollen, having done a pretty good job sending herself flying. Coran must have been told off for calling her “Katie”. The poor man couldn’t catch a break. It was best they head out and Lance got some rest  before someone snapped

“Actually, Coran, can we grab a blood bag? And borrow a conference room? Lance is a little dehydrated from sleeping in the sun”

“Good heavens, of course you can. Lance, what have I told you about keeping up your fluids”

Lance sighed at the pair of them

“Sorry, Coran. Keith’s doing that thing where he worries too much”

“Because you’ve barely eaten today!”

“Because I was too tired!”

“You still should have eaten!”

“And you’re worrying too much!”

  “Boys! Please. Matt, why don’t you grab Lance a blood bag out the fridge. Keith, you may use the main conference room. The Blades are out at the moment. Lotor fancied shopping, they’re providing an escort for him and Allura”

Keith hoped Allura wasn’t mad at not being able to come on the trip. It would have been nice to have her, yet another secret to try and keep over her slightly inhuman features. Matt rolled across the room on the examination stool, grabbing a blood bag out the fridge and rolling backwards over to them

“Save yourselves. Mum’s mad Pidge fell over...”

Colleen fixed Matt with a “mother” glare that sent a shiver down Keith’s spine

“That’s enough Matthew”

“Don’t be mad at them. They weren’t there when Pidge decided to show the world why she never made the Olympics”

“No, but you were. Honestly, when will the pair of you act your age?”

“Whelp. It was nice knowing you guys...”

  Keith tugged Lance back with him, Matt closing the door, Collen’s voice cut off as she started yelling at him

“She scares me”

Lance nodded

“Yep. You didn’t have to dob me in”

“I’m allowed to be worried”

“I’m fine... seriously, find me a corner and let me sleep”

“Not until you’ve eaten”

Lance sighed, Keith knowing it was a sigh of defeat

“Then I can go back to sleep?”

“I promise”

“Lead the way...”

    *

Lance made good on napping the moment he could. Keith found himself in the Blade’s main room from muscle memory, it seemed too much effort to find another room when this one empty. Draining the blood bag, Lance fell asleep too fast after eating. First he didn’t even want to eat, then he did, then he was asleep. In that order, with very little time between each step. With Lance sleeping, Keith had nothing to do but look at the pile of papers that’d seemed to accumulate while he’d been gone. There contained schematics of a building with no street address, and that was about the most interesting thing in the paper work.

  About an hour later their peace was disturbed. Pidge wheeling herself in, foot in a moon boot, as Matt held the door open

“Hey, losers! Look what I’ve got!”

Keith regretted everything thought he’d had about Coran needing to prioritise Lance when he say that boot. What kind of friend was he?!

“Pidge...”

“Relax, it’s a bad sprain. Coran put her in it because it’s the only way to keep the gremlin down”

Their talking roused Lance, sleepily he looked to Pidge, eyes widening

“Pidge?”

Coran chuckled, ruffling Pidge’s hair. Pidge looking murderous about it

“She’ll be just fine. Tippity-Top in no time!”

“She’ll be staying at home until she’s given clearance to be up and walking around again”

Pidge whined at her mother

“Muuuuuum. I’m fine. I’ve got these hell cool wheels to test out”

“That’s enough. You’re very lucky Coran was able to see you on short notice”

“My door is always open to friends. I feel like I’ve know our young Pidge for years”

“I would prefer she not get herself into these kinds of accidents to begin with”

“Mum, it was an accident! I didn’t exactly plan on face-planting!”

“I’m really sorry she was hurt...”

  What was Lance apologising for? Right, because he was Lance. Colleen pinched the bridge of her nose like Shiro would have

“This one is all on her. I’m relieved it wasn’t worse”

“You guys are fussing too much”

Matt chuckled at his sister

“That’s because we love our little Pidgeon. We’re going to split. I’ll let the others know Pidge is under house arrest”

“Shoot me already”

Pidge was going to be okay. Accidents happened. It wasn’t serious. A bad sprain wasn’t going to kill her... Keith took a deep breath. His heart racing at the sight of his friend like that, but he tried to be okay knowing she’d be okay

“Maybe we should find that ankle monitor you gave me for my birthday?”

Pidge gaped at him, before pouting

“I’m not the one who needs it...”

Lance snorted with laughter

“I don’t know. We all know you can’t keep a good gremlin down”

Pidge wheeled herself slightly backwards

“Well, I’m out of here! Later losers. Thanks for the weekend!”

“I’ll talk to you guys later. You right to get back to Garrison?”

“Yeah. I’ve got my car. See you later, guys. Nice to see you again, Colleen”

“You to, Lance, Keith”

   Coran let out a long breath once the trio had departed, before lightly slapping his palms against his cheeks

“I would not like to be Pidge. Colleen is a most formidable woman”

Lance yawned softly, nodding as he did

“She scares me. You probably get along with her better because you sub-contract out to her”

“We’ve met very rarely. I never would have placed her as Pidge’s mother. Now, my boy, I do believe you wanted me to a little looksie at you?”

Keith butted in before Lance could downplay his exhaustion

“He’s been tired all weekend. His body temperature dropped on the Saturday and he needed hours in front of the fireplace to bring it back up. He’s also been throwing up more and having trouble with scents”

Coran hummed, fingers going to play with the top of his moustache

“Fatigue and exhaustion are exceptionally common during the first trimester. As is feeling moody, and, or, hormonal. Let’s head to my office and I’ll do your blood work”

  Lance went to get up, only to trip, and hit his head against the table. Keith rushing to his side as his boyfriend groaned

“Babe!”

“I’m okay... my legs are still asleep like the rest of me”

His head wasn’t bleeding, but the egg was already swelling up

“That’s it, I’m carrying you”

“I’m...”

“You’re not fine. You had a whole bag of blood but you’re still tired as hell”

Lance sheepishly amended what he was going to say

“I’m going to be carried?”

“Yes. Now hold onto me”

  Hefting Lance up, his boyfriend was blushing, hand rubbing at the egg forming on his forehead

“Stop rubbing it”

“It hurts”

“All the more reason to leave it alone”

Coran laughed at the pair of them

“I can see you had a long weekend. I’ll try to be as quick as possible to you may go home and rest. I’d love to hear about all your adventures, if you’ve got time to fill this old fae in”

“Keith can tell you. I slept a lot and we went for a walk around a smell pond...”

“He overheated on the walk”

“You’ve got a big mouth for a man without a knife”

“And you said you wanted to talk to Coran, which means talking honestly”

Coran adding to conversation

“And I think perhaps this isn’t the place”

   Carrying Lance to Coran’s office, things were still slightly messy from the fae treating Pidge. It was the messiest he’d ever seen Coran’s office. Laying Lance on the bed, Lance immediately sighed as he sank back against the bed both of them knew wasn’t all that comfortable

“Right. Sleeve up, shirt up, let’s see what’s happening... oooh, I’ve been dying to see this little one again”

“You’re going to do an ultrasound?”

Keith hadn’t thought about Coran doing an ultrasound, he just wanted Lance to feel better and stuff...

“I will. I’m afraid I’ll be going in internally... I guess pants off too would be best”

“I’ll help him while you clean up”

“Do I get a say in this?”

An ultrasound did sound like a good idea. How were they supposed to know if everything was okay if they couldn’t see the baby?

“No. We have to make sure everything is okay with you and the baby”

“I hate it when my arse has to suffer for logic”

“I love you and your arse. You’ll be okay...”

Lance huffed at him

“It’s not your arse being probed at”

“No, but if you’re good I’ll buy you whatever you want to eat on the way home”

“Can I choose sleep instead?”

Lance would eat, then nap. He wasn’t getting out of it. Whatever his boyfriend wanted, he’d pay for, provided Lance gave him directions of where to go

“Nope. You have to eat”

“You’re so mean to me. Coran, can I at least keep my legs covered? I’m too tired to do much of anything”

“Sure, my boy. I’ll get you a blanket for privacy. You’ll need to tuck your knee up to your chest for me. Please try to bare with it”

   Lance’s face made the same expression as when Kosmo had his first anal thermometer. There was no happiness in his eyes, which reminded him his precious puppy was missing

“Where’s Kosmo?”

“I put him in Allura’s office. Oh, dear. I forgot he was in there...”

How could Coran forget Kosmo? How could he forget Kosmo?

“Babe, you can go get him...”

Now he was torn. Lance was finally in Coran’s hands, but Coran was going to start the ultrasound and he didn’t want to miss it... Buuuuut Kosmo was probably destroying Allura’s office. Was it too much to push the responsibility onto Coran seeing he locked Kosmo in there?

“I’ll get him after your scan...”

“I don’t mind if you want to go now”

“Are you saying I should?”

“Nope... I want you stay, but my butt isn’t enjoying this”

“It’s a nice butt”

“It’s be nicer without this huge arse wand up it”

  Both of them shut up when the image of their baby came up on the screen. Keith staring at the black blob, semi confused by the greyish line...

“Oh my...”

That didn’t sound good

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing is wrong, per say, but you’ll have twice the preparation to carry out”

“What?”

The question sounded dull, Keith not sure what Coran meant

“Yes, you can clearly see two sacks...”

“But there was only one before”

“It is possible to miss...”

Lance blinked half a dozen times

“Coran. You better not be fucking around. There was one. One. What do you mean there’s two”

“That’s how twins work... oh, my. Let me just...”

Keith went wobbly. Two... how were there two? There was one last time. One macaroon to worry about... what... how was there two?!

“Are you sure it’s not something he ate?”

Lance glared at him, Coran chuckling, Keith not appreciating either reaction

“My dear boys, there is indeed two in there and this should confirm it”

  A strange noise filled the room, like two racing beats... Lance asking

“Is that...?”

“You’re far along enough now detect both heartbeats. Oh... two babies! You’re going to have your hands quite full! One was a stroke of luck it was! It shows how deeply connected you are...”

“But you said...”

“It is possible one was behind the other, but they’re making themselves known now. Growing one baby is hard enough, two... I can certainly see why you’re exhausted my boy!”

Lance sighed

“I really am... is... are they both okay? I mean... we thought it was one?”

“Both little ones have a good strong beat... I’ll take some fresh photos and measurements. We’ll increase your blood intake to match. It’s very important you...”

Everything swam. The room spinning. Keith out of it before he hit the floor, his last thought before fainting was once again “how are there two?!”.

    *

Lance couldn’t react as Keith crumpled to the ground. He was in shock. Shock that... no way. He’d barely wrapped his head around one. Why was there two? He was getting his mind around one... why... no, how?

“Keith!”

The vampires face burned in embarrassment as Coran left the wand inside of him, to move around the examination table to Keith. Keith groaning as Coran looped his arm around him and moved the hunter to sit in the chair beside his desk

“Whaaa...”

“Just a little fainting spell. I imagine the news of twins was completely unexpected. Lance did have high hormone levels, I suspected it was thanks to his unique physiology...”

  Keith looked completely ashen. Lance’s eyes filling with guilty tears. How were there possibly two in there?! His boyfriend was scared when there was only one... two would surely mean he was worrying twice as much. Wasn’t he at the age where his fertility shouldn’t this good? Or did have super potent baby making sperm? And shouldn’t the testosterone in his system help prevent pregnancy? Was that why his ego was sending him crazy? Did the vampire in him already know he was carrying two? Making him twice the moody bitch he was? Twice the amount of blood he usually drank was a lot of blood. Like... way too much. He’d been careful for so many years to split a bag into three... Would keith be turned off by him drinking more human blood when he was still fighting to settle himself over Lance feeding on strangers? This had to be a joke... despite the evidence right of him. Evidence that screamed this was no joke. He’d heart their heartbeats before the wand slipped. Two racing rhythms of two balls of cells that’d be human someday in the not so distant future

“Place your head between your legs, and take deep breaths”

  What was going on in Keith’s head? Keith was only child. He’d never had a brother until he was already an adult. He’d missed out on all the fights that came with having siblings, and what was Shiro going to say about there being two? Would he be allowed to keep them both? Or would he be labelled as a threat and forced to run? Where would he run? He couldn’t leave Mami. She was old. She only had so much time in this world. He’d never leave her behind to spend it alone. He couldn’t choose between her and Keith. He wanted both of them. He needed both of them... soft sobs escaped his lips. Coran said these symptoms were normal, yet all Lance had done lately was sleep and cry. He wasn’t normal. He’d kept his emotions reined in so tightly that the metaphoric straps bit into his hands. Would it be selfish to want both? Two little Keith’s... with Keith’s big purple eyes and messy black hair...

“Oh, babe...”

  Keith ignored Coran’s instructions, pushing himself over to grip Lance’s hands

“Babe... Hey, look at me. Whatever you’re thinking, I still love you”

Him... He loved Keith. He’d never found love in anyone like he did with Keith. Keith was the oxygen to his lungs... he might be dead but the blood in his system still needed oxygen... sure, he could hold his breath far longer than a human and sometimes he questioned his need to breathe. But without Keith his lungs didn’t work. The space seemed deprived and cold, like being sucked into the vacuum of space

“I want to go home”

“We will. We’ll go home. Coran’s going to clean you up and then we’ll get Kosmo and we’ll go home”

They both needed to think. He couldn’t tell Keith he wanted to go home in an attempt to run away until his thoughts made sense again

“Garrison...”

“We can go back to Garrison. We can... we... we’ll work this out...”

“But... we...”

“Rieva knows. Matt’s in Platt... we’ll kick everyone out, if that’s what you need”

Lance let out a louder sob

“I don’t deserve you”

Leaning down, Keith nuzzled into his hair affectionately. He was showing Keith all the uncool sides of him again

“I love you. I love all of you... we’ll work it out...”

“How...?”

“I don’t know, babe. But you’re not alone...”

“I didn’t...”

“Shhh... we didn’t know. We didn’t know...”

“I don’t deserve you being kind to me”

“I’m not going to run from this... I need to think, but you’re not... I’m not walking away from you. No matter what you think”

“I just want you to be happy”

“And we will be, together. Coran, can you please clean him. We’re not staying here”

  Coran came to the head of the bed, placing his hand on Lance’s shoulder as he softly answered

“Of course, my boys. We’ll keep the scan appointment for in a few days. I’m prescribing lots of rest, and keep your food and blood intake up. You’re going to be emotional, and your fatigue is most likely increased by your emotions. I want you to rest. I’ll extend you leave until the next scan, Keith. If anything happens, you are to bring him here immediately”

“Will anything happen?”

“I’m not sure. Both heartbeats are good and solid. I would ask you to stay longer, yet neither of you seem particularly keen on that. You are both shocked, and this situation is unique... sexual intercourse is fine provided Lance is getting enough nutrients and energy. Have you been giving him his injections?”

“I’ve been... I forgot to yesterday... and I don’t remember if we...”

Nope. Keith was asleep on his feet again and Lance had spent the morning throwing up as his zombie boyfriend tried to human before coffee

“Not this morning... we were packing”

“These injections are important. The demands on your body will be higher with multiples. You may not like it, but each injection will be given with fresh blood. I trust you, Keith, to organise this. Lance, it may not be what you want to hear, but this is what your body needs. Aggression can be a sign you are not getting enough energy from the amount of blood you currently consume. I know you have your own beliefs on this, yet what is important now is keeping your energy levels high to compensate for their energy lost. Keith, make sure you don’t allow him to sleep for days at a time. If he becomes lethargic to the point he won’t wake, you must give him blood immediately and bring him in. Lance, we will get you through this pregnancy, but I am out of my depths with multiple births. I will not allow anything to go wrong under my watch”

  Things sounded somehow worse than ever. Did it not count that he was trying? That he was forcing himself and making the effort despite knowing it’d come back up?! Apparently he was an unfit father already... He’d wanted to sit and explain things to Coran. He wanted to understand why he was acting like he’d never acted before. He didn’t expect this. That a lack of blood could cause anger, well, he knew that, but he was already drinking more than ever. He should be stronger than this! He was 45, not 8... and he was a goddamn vampire. His ego was so on edge that his nails felt tender, ready to extend if Coran kept going on as he was

“See, babe. Coran’s going to make sure you’re okay, and that you’ll be okay...”

“I feel like the most immature person in the room... what happened to my awkward boyfriend?”

Keith kissed his hair again

“He fell hopelessly in love”

“You really a kind of hopeless. But, like, a little bit hopeless”

“Nah, I’m completely fucking whipped. Now, what do you want to eat?”

  He didn’t want to, but Keith was trying to distract him from Coran

“I think... maybe strawberries?”

“And what else?”

“Italian?”

“Done. You’ll have to give me directions”

“Okay, but I’m paying”

“Nope. Let me be all manly”

“You’re very manly”

“I do try my hardest”

“You’re very trying too...”

Keith pouted at him, Lance adding

“But that’s something I really like about you”

His boyfriend brightened a little, not enough to make Lance feel better about his failed joke

“I really love you, Keith”

“I know. I love you, too”

[alovesthis]

All Things Must Pass - Dean Winchester CHAPTER SEVEN

Dean Winchester x (female) Reader Fic

Fic Summary: Reader and Dean Winchester reunite after not seeing each other in a few years, ever since he told her to leave him and his issues behind. Reuniting wasn’t what you expected it would be like because of past feelings, memories and a life threatening situation that was placed upon Dean Winchester.

Warnings: none?!

Word Count: 3.9

sorry for the delay - hope you enjoy! 

CHAPTER SEVEN

The four of you were standing in a motel parking lot in Ypsilanti, Michigan and it wasn’t as snowy as you expected it to be. The ground is wet and dark, might’ve been snowing or raining here for the past few days, you aren’t so sure. But the more you look around you noticed a few snow piles every other block, and over sized holiday decorations literally everywhere. Despite the cheery looks on the civilians you passed by, you four had definitely stood out with your tough demeanor. 

Against the impala, Stevie sat on top of the hood as Deans scolded her for doing so but let her be as he could never say no to her. She maybe a few years younger, reckless and tough, but Dean has a soft spot for her just like she has for him. Sam held a cream colored manila folder, talking about this new case. 

“Santa?” You keep laughing uncontrollably as you reach into your truck and lift your bag out of the back seat. Once you have the bag over your shoulder, you turn around and start walking with the boys and Stevie to the motel rooms. 

“It’s weird, I know. Could be a possibility, maybe the folklore of Krampus?” Sam says. “We gotta go talk to this Mrs. Walsh. Her husband disappeared according to the reports.” 

You hum, “Alright. Let’s get going.”

Stevie opens up your motel room that you’re sharing with her and waits for you. You reach the door and lean against the wall that’s covered with big red bows and gold glitter. You were beginning to hope the holidays will fly fast and that this case won’t take forever, not wanting to continuously be reminded of the past. 

“I’ll throw on my suit,” You say eagerly. “Whoever wants to join me and investigate, meet me out here in ten!” 

When you walk into the motel room, you throw your bag on the bed and rummage through to get out your long black slacks, a white button up and your black blazer that was folded neatly inside each other. As you unpack it, you notice a few wrinkles and sigh in annoyance. You’ve been forgetting to buy yourself one of those zip up clothing bags to store and protect the only two suits you had. Thinking quickly, you run to the bathroom and turn the heat up on the shower and let it steam, letting your suit hang out in there to lessen some of the wrinkles. 

“Y/N!” Stevie calls out. 

You walk out of the bathroom, shutting the door on your way out to keep the steam in, and look at your sister. “What’s up?”

“I figured Sam and I will stay behind, continue to look through the books maybe walk around town. Look for anything suspicious or interesting.” 

“I take it Dean and I will be meeting Mrs. Walsh then?” 

“Yup.” Stevie smiles and you exhale a laugh. You go back to your bag, looking for your fake badge and your gun. Your shoulders are slouched in exhaustion, perhaps it’s sadness for yet another year added to many, without your parents. “Hey, you alright?” 

“I just want to this done, you know?” You stop doing what you’re doing and your knees lean into the bed. “I just...I miss them and I know it’s been such a long time but it hurts..” 

“I know, I miss them too.” Stevie shrugs. “Listen, I know it does. It’s always going to hurt. But then I realize that as long as I have you by my side, I’ll be alright.” 

“You know, I feel like I should be the one saying these things to you. Since I’m older.” You lighten up the conversation as a tear falls down your cheek. 

“We both know I’ve always been a bit more wiser than you.” Stevie laughs as she stands up to hug you. “Every year, I always think about them and then I think about how you saved me.”

“I didn’t save you, that was John.” You reply. 

Stevie scoffs and rolls her eyes, “Yeah okay, he saved us that night. But after that? He just threw us in the back of his car with Sam and Dean. He treated us like we barely existed, he treated us and them like shit. So yeah, maybe he did save me and you that night. But it was you, my sister who raised me and made sure that I was okay with what happened to mom and dad. Hell, even Dean was there for me like he was for Sam. You were there, and you helped me heal. And now that I’m older, I can be here for you in the ways that you have.” 

“Stevie…” 

“Look, what I’m trying to say is that you are always there for everyone.” She sighs. “With the holidays and getting back in touch with Dean...there’s a lot going on, so it’s okay to let me be there for you.” 

The conversation is cut short by a few knocks on the motel door, signaling you that Dean’s ready to get going. You knock your shoulder into Stevie’s arm and smile in appreciation for her kind words for you. “Be right out!” You call out and walk back to the bathroom to shut the water off from the shower and change into your FBI pantsuit. 

“Thank you for that,” you say as you walk out the door, buttoning up the black jacket that went over your white button up. The knocking starts up again and you shake your head in annoyance, picturing Dean standing behind the door waiting impatiently. 

“Alright, Dean! My god, would you stop-” You open the door and look out to see Sam standing against the motel wall. “Oh,” You grin up at Sam who towers over you, but you weren’t short like your sister who looked like could be a kid whenever she stood next to the Winchesters. 

“Sorry. Where’s Dean?” 

“Went to grab us all coffee around the corner for us.” Sam nods. “How are you doing, you know with...everything?” 

“I’m okay, Sam. I think.” You shrug as you walk out the door, Sam following you towards the car. “Just gotta push through this and soon the holidays will be over with.” 

“You know you can talk to us, right? Dean and I...Stevie too.” 

“Of course I know that, thanks Sam.” You bump into his arm, giving a friendly smile. 

“Dean says he wants to celebrate Christmas.” He says after a few seconds. 

“He does?” 

“Yeah, I guess he didn’t tell you because you know…”

“My parents.” You confirm, leaning on the wet Impala door. “How do you feel about it?” 

“He’s treating everything like a last hurrah. And I get it, because he’s gonna die soon, but I don’t like it.” 

“I don’t like either Sam.” You extend your arm up and place your hand on his shoulder. “I want to believe there’s something we can do.” 

“But?” 

“No buts…” You shrug, squeezing his shoulder before removing it and placing your hand in your pants pocket. “I just want to believe we can save him, or maybe just be there for him. We have each other.” 

“Yeah, we do.” Sam nods, trying to hide his sadness with a forceful smile.

“Not too get all mushy here,” You scoff. “But uh...If we can’t prevent it from happening, you do know you have Stevie and I. We’re a family and I don’t want you to go through shit alone.” 

Silence stays between you two, as Sam is afraid to even utter a word without any tears threatening to spill. These conversations were going to happen, no matter how much Dean or anyone else wanted to have them. Suddenly, Dean is walking back to you two, catching the last few words of your sentence. 

“Don’t go through what shit alone?” He raises his brows as he stands in front of the Impala facing you and Sam. 

“Ah nothing, just the research.” You smile. “So, Sam and Stevie will be hanging back while we go see Mrs. Marsh.” 

“Okay.” Dean nods. “Here ya go...two large black coffee for you nerds.” Dean hands Sam the coffee as he roll his eyes at him. 

“Thanks, jerk.” Sam says, before he tells you two he’ll see you later as he disappears into the motel room to hit the books with Stevie. The four of you were the brains and the muscles, but it’s overly obvious that Sam and Stevie absolutely love the research aspect of it all more than you two. It had its moments, but it frustrated you and Dean a lot more. 

“Look at you, blue steel.” You squint at him up and down, staring at his all black FBI suit. “It’s been awhile since I’ve seen you like this.” 

“Yeah, I do pull it off don’t I?” Dean says, handing out a coffee cup to you. His green eyes are almost staring at you lovingly as a tiny smile plays on his lips as he looks you up and down. 

“Been awhile since I’ve seen you in that.” He coughs, making his way to the drivers side of the Impala. You’re oblivious to the way he starts to get nervous as you just stare at him, distracted by how good he really looks. “You uh, you look good.” 

“I’ve grown up some more, Dean.” You laugh as you stare over at him with a smirk as you begin to tease him. “I can tell you have too. A lot actually.” 

You finally see it. He’s taken back, but in a good way he thinks. You see him fidget as he stands there trying to process whether or not you’re flirting with him, or trying to make him flustered and break down his ‘cool guy’ exterior. 

“So, you ever gonna let me drive this?” You change the subject to ease not only his nerves, but yours as well. You tap on the top of Baby and flash him a smile.

“This?” He scoffs. “Not gonna let you drive my baby. Not until I’m dead.” Dean raises his brows, a tiny smirk forms on his face as he smoothly gets inside the impala, leaving you still leaning against the closed car door as you listen to the impala get started up. 

You laugh in bewilderment and step aside to open and get inside the passenger seat. Once you’re settled, you look over to him watching his hand is turning the dial to pick the right music station as his eyes focus ahead. He starts driving slowly down the road, away from the motel and to Mrs. Marshs’ home.

“So, who are we today?” Dean asks, as he peers over at you. 

“You are Agent Mick.” You grin to yourself in amusement. “And I’m Agent Nicks.” 

“Mick...Nicks.” He murmurs to himself. “Fleetwood Mac, really?” 

“Says you.” You scoff. “Do I need to count all the names of rockstar and couples you’ve chosen for us?”

He chuckles after taking a moment to recall all the names he’s picked out for you two in the past. All the purposely chosen couples from bands, or names of groupies and all things 1970’s and occasionally some people from the 90’s which you chose, made him smile. Although he hadn’t had a simple life, and you not being able to remember much about that slight part of yours, he wishes (and as did you) he could go back in time where you two were just kids, teens trying to get by and enjoy life. 

“Yeah...those were the days.” 

“Dean…”

“If you’re about to ask me if I’m okay, the answer is yeah I am. Now, are you?” He glances over with his eyebrows raising in question. 

You roll your eyes and avert them to the window. “Let’s just get to Mrs. Marsh and get this case over and done with.” 

“Alright.” Dean sighs, focusing back to the road, leaving you to settle with your thoughts as he was left with questions and thoughts of his own as he reminisces past holidays spent with you. Days where things were slightly different and better between the both of you. After the discussion with Mrs. Marsh, you called Stevie when you were finished as you and Dean made your way back to the motel room to meet them. 

Inside the motel, the atmosphere between the two brothers felt off, just like it is between you and Dean. After explaining the story that Mrs. Marsh told and the facts Dean and you figured out, the four of you slumped around you and Stevie’s motel room. The air inside was hot, filled with the smell of coffee and the old lore books.

“So, you found a tooth?” Stevie questions. “Wasn’t there a clean house? Thought they checked everything.”

“When does the police really ever do their job thoroughly?” Dean asks. 

“True.” Stevie chuckles as she leans back in her chair. “The tooth, where was it?” 

“In the chimney.” You stand up and walk to her, placing the tooth on the table then crossing your arms together against your chest. “My guess is maybe this evil Santa did it. Obviously, but the point is, her husband disappeared.” 

“The chimney..I don’t know,” dean raises his hands up, “there’s just no way a man fits up a chimney, it’s too narrow.”

“There’s just no way he fits up in one piece.” Sam adds.

“What are we thinking, evil Santa sliced and dice the man?” Stevie suggests. 

“Maybe, or possibly just dragged upwards. That can explain the tooth. We just need to figure out why him.” You say. “Look through the books, figure it all out and fast.” 

“Alright! You guys hit the books, I’m starving.” Dean stands up and throws his leather jacket on. There was something about the rugged, beat up jacket on him that always made you feel both uneasy and sympathetic. Possibly because he looked so good in it, while on the other hand you knew it was John’s and you never like the man. 

“We just ate breakfast.” Stevie digs at him. “How are you so hungry all the time.”

“Yeah, we had breakfast like hours ago!” Dean says. “Oh come on, you’re telling me our life doesn’t make you hungry all the time?”

“You know what Dean, go get food.” You gesture to the door, shaking your head. “But please, just bring me back-”

“More coffee, I know.” He winks your way as he opens the door. “See ya.” 

“Your brother is something else.” Stevie stands up to walk to the bathroom, looking at Sam and you. “I don’t know how you two are related and Y/N, I don’t see how you love him.” 

“Stevie!” You gasp, letting out a confused laugh at why she stared at you while walking backwards into the bathroom with a huge smirk on your face. You were so thankful Dean left for food and not witnessing an attack on your feelings for him (you pushed it down and away though, pretending like they didn’t exist).

You hear Sam chuckle from behind you until you whip your head around and stare at him flustered. “I don’t love him.” 

“Yeah, sure.” Sam shakes his head, while opening his laptop and typing away. You scoff and grab the pile of books on the table and throw yourself on the bed, brooding within the books trying to stop thinking about things and focus back to the case. 

After a while, Dean comes back and Sam and Stevie are stuck on the evil Santa idea. All of you kept thinking it’s crazy, but everything you’ve encountered was crazy. So things aren’t far fetched in this life anymore, not even an evil Santa in all the lore you’ve read and researched. Sam was beginning to give up on the idea until Dean had sat down with you, going over each others notes and stories. Sam’s eager and you both realize that the two victims went to the same place before they disappeared, or were dragged up the chimney. Santa’s freaking Village. 

“Alright boys, you head to Santa’s Village while we hang back. Maybe look over the town again.” You say, standing up to put on your coat. “We meet back at a diner, or here in a couple hours.” 

“Give us a ring if you find anything.” Stevie says, following you out the door with your jacket. 

“Why did we get stuck with Santa’s Village?” Dean says to his brother once you two are out of the room. 

“Don’t be baby.” Sam rolls his eyes and laughs, before leaving Dean in the motel room alone. 

As the boys went to visit the village and informed you that they’d be investigating through the night over at some cosplaying Father Christmas’ trailer. Sam said he fits the description, so you and Stevie decide to look back at the victims homes in hopes to find something you and Dean had missed. Sneaking into the homes were easy for Stevie and you, more so for Stevie since she was short and was extremely quiet on her feet. But everyone that knew you and Stevie knew that she was strong as hell and that no one should judge her the way she looked or stood short. 

When Stevie and you make it, nothing is found but a wreath that doesn’t look quite traditional, and not in a good way. Very silent, Stevie suggests that maybe you should snap some pictures and take a sample back to the motel for Sam and Dean -- maybe it’s something. The rest of the night is spent in the motel room together, half asleep and waiting for the brothers to return. 

The two of you were jolted awake as Sam and Dean burst through the door with urgency. 

“Seriously, why can’t you guys ever stay calm?” Stevie groans. “Barging in my motel room. What, did you two break the door?” 

You groggily laugh and stretch before standing up. “You know, she’s not wrong. You almost took down that door. Did you forget you guys were six feet tough guys?” 

“Alright, enough of this banter.” Dean scoffs. “Evil Santa has struck again.” 

“How? Weren’t we all just out and about?” You say. “How did we not know?”

“Just happened.” He answers. 

“Hey,” Sam says, walking to the table and picking up a part of the wreath you took. “We found this too.” 

“Oh, so it’s important?” You ask. “Stevie said it might be something but she can’t remember what it was. Mentioned something about pagon rites.

“We gotta call from Bobby.” 

“Bobby…” You smile. “I haven’t seen him in awhile. What did he say?” 

“I told him you two were here with us, sends his love.” Sam smiles.

“Called Sam and I  morons too.” Dean raises his coffee cup at you and smiles before chugging his drink.

“I miss him.” You say. 

“Me too. We’ll have to take a trip to him soon.” Stevie mentions. “Did you mention the wreath?” 

“Meadowsweet.” 

“Meadowsweet!” Stevie exclaims. “Fuck, I knew what it was.” 

“How do you know?” Same asks..

“I don’t really, but I remember reading some lore once, mentioned the herb and paganism. I don’t think it’s good...you know, considering what’s going on now.”

“Yeah, yeah. Pagon lore.” 

“Wow, amazing.” Dean says flatly as he stares between Sam and your sister. You smile in amusement before sitting next to Dean at the table, drinking some coffee he had brought for you and Stevie. 

“They used meadowsweet for human sacrifices.” Sam explains. 

“So, it’s not evil Santa then?” You ask.

“It’s not Father Christmas from the village..so probably not.” Dean says. “What exactly is it?”

“Kind of like a chum for their Gods.” 

“What’s the point in using that in Christamas wreaths?” Stevie asks, joining you three at the table. 

“It’s tradition I guess. Every christmas tradition is pagan.” Sam explains. 

“Christmas is Jesus’ birthday.” Dean purses his lips as he walks over to Sam. 

“Ah, see Jesus’s birthday is in the Fall.” Stevie says, as you three turn to look at her. “What, I know everything okay?” 

“Yeah, besides it was actually the winter solstice festival-”

“Alright, can we get back on track?” You ask, smiling at the brothers. “The pagans, the meadowsweet?”

“Right.” Sam says. 

“So, a Pagon God maybe?” Stevie asks. 

“A God? Well that’s a first.” You furrow your brows. 

“Don’t believe in a God?” Dean asks. 

“I live life like this,” you turn to Dean and explain. “I kinda won’t believe it till I see with my own eyes, some proof. Like the spirits and monsters and demons.” 

“Oh I know…” he nods. “Not judging.”

“So, I’m thinking Pagon God.” Sam confirms. 

“If you’re saying Pagon God and mentioning the winter solstice, my guess is god of the winter solstice.” Stevie says. 

“Yeah...name is Hold Nickar.” 

As the conversation goes on, you reach back for the lore book re-reading some sections about the winter solstice and the human sacrifices. Your eye catches that the God is supposed to give something in return for the sacrifice yo make for the person - weather change. Then it clicks. Arriving in Ypsilanti days ago and noticing no heavy snow or harsh weather anywhere. Just when you stand up and walk to the motel door and open it, Dean looks out the window just as Sam mentions mild weather. 

“No storms, no heavy snow…” You inch back and shut the door.  

“No snow in the middle of December.” Dean points. “In the middle of Michigan.”

“It’s definitely the Pagon God then.” Stevie jumps to her feet. “How the hell are we gonna kill a God?” 

“Sam?”

“Bobby’s actually working on that for us.”

“I love that old man.” Stevie smiles. “So I guess our next move, we figure out where and who is selling those wreaths.” 

“You think they’re selling them on purpose?” Dean asks her. 

“Probably? I don’t know. We just gonna find out and find out fast.”

“Yeah, figure it out before there’s a fourth victim.” You say. “We’ll split up again, yeah?” 

Dean stares at you, “You wanna-” 

“Sam and I will go into town, find a card store or some christmas shops. You and Stevie can wait for a call from Bobby, do some more digging.”

Dean coughs as you ignored him. You knew he would want to split up with you again, but after Stevie had brought up your repressed feelings for Dean, and it being christmas season, you didn’t really want to wallow in any of that. It’s ironic, you heading into town where everything you’re surrounded by is decorations. But you’re not sure how long you can sit in a motel with hot air from the rusty heat filling the room. 

You make your way to the door, waiting for Sam to grab his jacket. 

“You better hand the phone over to Stevie when Bobby calls.” You look at Dean with a soft smile. 

“Of course.” 

And with that out of the way, Sam and you had left the motel room and made your way into town with him driving your truck as your wrist was still healing from the last case. It was silent in the truck. Both of you reeling on the inside about Dean and this Pagon God christmas case, filled with anxiety and exhaustion. You were thinking this better be over with, smoothly and fast. All you want and need...is sleep.

---

AO3 LINK: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27785824/chapters/68283436

TAGLIST (if you want to be added, or removed let me know in my DM): 

@akshi8278 @deanswaywardgirl @canonboobs @vikkiwalker 

[sonicringbond]

Sonic Ring Bond: The Journey - Scene 29

At last, we come to part 1 of the end of of what I’ve been dubbing the first cour of season 1. From here Sonic and Rosy are going to be forced to really learn about the dimensional layers of the world they’ve ended up in and decide how big of a part they will play in the events to come. Before that though, they have to deal with the battle Kukku Armada in...

    ~Everything should have been better. It was Sonic. It was really him! I finally found him! I don’t even know how long it’s taken or if I remember everything I’ve been through searching for him. Yet, just finding Sonic alone didn’t make things better. Things were so, so bad.~

    Pipes and valves screamed and crackled with arcs of electricity within the heart of Battle Kukku Island. The spectacle terrified the pirates who called it home, but within those labs, Doctor Fukurokov, who had taken over the band of pirates as his own after their first terrible defeat by Tails smiled gleefully. The old owl’s twisted beak appeared even more twisted as the light within the lab he stood in flickered and flashed. Long shadows punctuated by moments of darkness and piercing flashes of light. From beyond his round spectacles Doctor Fukurokov was hypnotized by the glow of the Red Star Ring. His laughter though echoed far more hauntingly through the island than did the glow of the Ring.

    “So much power! It seems unlimited! So unlimited!” The mad owl laughed in maniacal glee. “With this! With this the Battle Kukku Armada and the name Doctor Fukurokov will become history itself! Who cares about the fool fox! We shall rule and plunder everything!”

    ~According to Sonic, at some point during his own travels, he had caught wind of the mean old pirates who had caused us to end up in these strange lands and had given chase. His current goal was to put an end to them once and for all. But… well…~

    “Sonic, you can’t! They aren’t robots or golems or anything else of the sort! They may be bad people, but they’re still people!”

    With Draw clinging to her back piggyback style, Rosy tried to plead with Sonic as they overlooked Battle Kukku Island from a vantage point provided by the torn apart ruins held high above by the vortex of sea water. Above them the mysterious little planet that seemed to always be watching Rosy observed the argument, perhaps amused from its nest within the storm.

    “Look kid,” Sonic began as he stuck his pinky finger into his ear and scratched around, “you haven’t seen what these bird brains have been up to. If you did, I doubt you’d be surprised how hard it’d be for you to forgive them too.”

    “Are you really in any shape to fight such a big battle?” Draw asked from Rosy’s back and Sonic cocked his head to the side to look at him.

    “You’re still here? Heh! You got guts tyke, but I think it’s time you take a Ring Gate somewhere safe.”

    “Not happening,” Draw shook his head. Sonic placed his hands on his hips in response, and as his foot began to tap Draw attempted to explain. “Mote says I have to stick with the medium, no matter what. Since I can’t run as fast as you two that means I’ll be staying right here.”

    “Not a good idea tyke,” Sonic warned Draw as he rubbed his nose with a finger. Looking back over his shoulder at the floating island below, Sonic eyed the red glow starting to seep through the whole of the island. “Things are about to get ugly either way, and I’d rather not involve any more of the locals than these bird brains already have. No reason for you to get hurt.”

    “Mote says it can find the Red Star Ring,” Draw started, but tilted his head and looked down at the fairy where it hid behind Rosy’s spines. “…And apparently make me as fast as you too.”

    Rubbing his nose more, Sonic exhaled loudly. “I have a hard time believing that. I’m the fastest around if you hadn’t heard, tyke.”

    “It doesn’t look like it at the moment,” Draw challenged.

    “Please don’t fight you two!” Rosy butted in having been overwritten by the two boys. “If the pirates have been that bad, and if Mote wants Draw with me, and if you’re really still that hurt Sonic, and, and, and…”

    Her eyes starting to swirl about from the weight of everything happening at once, Rosy began to lose her balance and footing. Able to free himself from her back, Draw found himself helping Sonic stabilize the distressed hedgehog girl and the two exchanged challenging and untrusting looks.

    “Look you two, maybe I’m not one-hundred percent yet, but that’s nothing a few extra Rings won’t solve.”

    “Then let Draw, Mote and me go get the Red Star Ring,” Rosy suggested as she let the two boys support her. “I shouldn’t have any trouble taking it from wherever it is. Knowing you’re here… Knowing you’re here Sonic, I can do anything!”

    Beaming at Sonic, Rosy’s good cheer and ever limitless energy made him take a nervous step back as he smiled awkwardly. Rosy was forced to take a step forward towards him though as she had not fully regained her own balance yet. As she stepped though, she put a firm foot down and her bright smile was promptly replaced by a threatening pout. “But no fighting Sonic! If you have to, wreck all their ships while you get the Rings you need. Wreck them so badly they they’ll never be able to repair them and have to live the rest of their lives here. But don’t hurt anyone! Please!”

    “Honestly, kid,” Sonic scratched at the back of his head as Rosy pleaded of him with her words and her eyes. Before he could say anything else though Rosy produced a Ring that was significantly smaller than a normal Ring and pressed it into Sonic’s free hand. “A Ring Gate?”

    “For when you get your Rings,” Rosy explained as she released Sonic’s hands and produced two more Rings of normal size. “And at least one more Ring to keep you safe. Come save me when you’re done, okay~♥”

    “Really?” Sonic asked with a sigh and roll of his eyes as he accepted the ring. “You really think the bird brain in charge is going to catch you?”

    “Yeah!” Draw butted in defending himself from an unintended attack. “Pirates may not be golems, but I can keep you safe anyway!”

    “Even from my back?” Rosy teased as she turned and offered Draw the second Ring she had. Draw swallowed loudly knowing what it entailed and Rosy giggled at him. “It’s either this or letting Sonic send you somewhere safe.”

    For a change, Mote presented itself before Rosy and shook itself to and fro in violent disagreement. “See~♥ Even Mote agrees with me. Though I think I should give you two some privacy~♥”

    “Don’t make it sound weird you weirdo girl! It’s already bad enough!”

    “It’s fine,” Rosy giggled as she let Draw take the Ring she offered him and turned back to Sonic. She could barely keep her giggling contained as she saw Sonic quickly change his own amused expression. “Having fun Sonic?”

    “It’s never boring at least when you’re around, kid,” Sonic admitted as he turned his back on Rosy. He could not ignore his curiosity though and looked back a moment as a golden light washed over the area as a new Ring Bond between Draw and Mote began. He could not focus on it though as Rosy embraced him from behind and pushed him to the edge of the piece of ruin they stood on.

    “You already know how those work. Though I have to tell you about a worse bad guy than these pirates who can also make them.”

    “What!”

    “See Sonic, we have to hurry,” Rosy refused to answer as she knew she was going to have to let go of Sonic. She could not miss the growing intensity of the red glow that was spilling out of Battle Kukku Island.

    ~It was hard to tell that it even still came from the island. Everything was engulfed by that eerie red light now. But Sonic’s eyes still shone like brilliant emeralds. Even with him not in his usual top form, those eyes, and that smile… Ooh~! Sonic is so cool and dashing! I just know he’ll be okay. But it still hurts letting him go. But Draw and I had to go to the heart of the pirate island if we were going to retrieve the Red Star Ring before those mean old pirates did something really bad. And maybe the ghosts agreed with me. And something more too.

    ~As Draw and I let Mote lead us into the heart of the island full of pipes and metal everywhere, the ghosts from the castle and the ruins filled it and the pirates were helpless against them. I feel kind of sorry for them. But doing bad things it was only natural that they would have bad things happen to them. But I can’t explain the plants that were starting to take over the island.

    ~I had seen Battle Kukku Island more times before than I cared to remember, even out of what I could, but I know there were never any plants growing there. It was all rock and metal. Those mean old pirates really didn’t care about making anything beautiful. They just stole the beauty from other people and hurt them too.

    ~Maybe Sonic was right, and I shouldn’t have been so forgiving of them. But they’re still people. If we stop treating them like people, can we still call ourselves people? Ooh~ I don’t know! And the mean old owl who leads them doesn’t make it any easier.~

    “Ah, the fool fox’s friend,” Doctor Fukurokov sneered as Rosy stepped out into a laboratory toward a glass sphere in the middle of a wild contraption she could make no sense of. Within the sphere though a Red Star Ring spun faster and faster, slowly becoming difficult to even make out as a Ring at all. “Come to steal my treasure, have you?”

    “Well, I won’t take it if you give it to me,” Rosy replied sweetly as she clasped her hands behind her back and began to sway her body back and forth. Just to make it clear that she was asking though, she added one more word for good measure. “Please~♥”

    “Don’t be absurd you flightless rodent,” Doctor Fukurokov scoffed at Rosy’s request. “I may be impressed that you made it this far at all, but your luck has run out. A pirate never gives up their treasure, and I rule over all of them! You need merely die so I can stuff and make a trophy out of you to torment that fool fox!”

    “That’s taking it a step too far isn’t it,” Draw asked as he stepped out from the shadows behind Rosy, his bow drawn back with a notched arrow ready to fly. “I never would have guessed there were people so nasty.”

    “Ha! I don’t know who you are boy, but be glad I need a survivor to spread word of the terror of my armada and the unlimited power I wield!”

    “You mean that Ring?” Draw asked nodding his head towards the Red Star Ring.

    Even behind his thick glasses, it was obvious that Doctor Fukurokov’s eyes widened. Pressing a finger to her muzzle, Rosy looked at Draw concerned.

    “Draw, what are you and Mote thinking?

    “This.”

    *Thwip!*

Scene 29 · CLEARED Mark of a Red Star, to be continued

-----

Not as action heavy as last time, but the end game with Doctor Fukurokov is at hand. I hope everyone is feeling the tension as things get ready to go sideways. Just one more scene and cour 1 will be finished. Please look forward to it and get ready for cour 2. it’s coming hot on the heals of cour 1.

-----

Special Thanks to Cutegirlmayra Story by @JoshTarwater/SonicFanJ Inspiring Song – Second Advent – Tsutomu Narita, GRANBLUE FANTASY – Granblue Fantasy Original Soundtrack: Chaos

Fair Use Disclaimer

Sonic the Hedgehog and all affiliated characters and logos are the express property and Copyright© of SEGA SAMMY HOLDINGS used without permission under Title 17 U.S.C Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976 in which allowance is made for “fair use” for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research. “Fair use” is use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be considered copyright infringement. The Sonic Ring Bond: The Journey alternate universe (AU) consumer written work of fiction is a non-profit transformative work primarily for personal use and can and will be taken down without warning or prior notice at the request of the copyright holder(s) should it not be recognized under “fair use”.

*Sonic Ring Bond logo created by DEE Art – twitter.com/daryliscute.

Sonic Ring Bond AU and Sonic Ring Bond: The Journey are the creation of Joshua David Tarwater/ynymbus/sonicfanj/@Joshtarwater and is to be, including all contents herein considered for all legal purposes the property of the Sonic the Hedgehog intellectual property (IP) and copyright owners, SEGA SAMMY HOLDINGS. All story contributors via prompt, suggestion, written scene, art, and all and every other contribution acknowledge that all contributed material is forfeit for legal purposes to SEGA SAMMY HOLDINGS upon official request from SEGA SAMMY HOLDINGS.

[withlovekth]

Darkroom (Part Six)

Part One / Two / Three / Four / Five

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader Genre: artist! taehyung, best friend! jimin, college au, fluff, smut, angst Contains: swearing, suicide mention Word Count: 3.2k

Author’s Note: Okay, honestly this was supposed to be a stand alone one shot that I wrote three years after I had stopped writing Darkroom but my housemate inspired me to rewrite it to fit because she didn’t want me to abandon it, so here we are.

You couldn’t help but constantly come back to a city that reminded you of him, all because of a conversation you had years ago in his nearly empty room. Given opportunities, a steady job, free housing— Who would pass up a chance like that? You thought, maybe, he would.

Is that what you’re still up to these days?

You shoved your hands into your coat pockets. A stream of air visibly left your lips as you aimlessly walked by random store fronts. Your reflection reminded you of a time where you stupidly started smoking because you hoped it’d help you stop thinking about him. But thinking about him also made you stop smoking. Maybe he would have told you to quit anyway.

Was that the kind of person you were? It’s getting harder to remember.

Every time you’re here, you’d make an excuse to explore as if you haven’t seen all the touristy spots the first time around. A part of you hoped you’d run into him, but the thought of your paths crossing filled you up with anxiety. You’d fantasize what you’d say to him. If, that is, you’d say anything at all. Most of the time all the daydreaming would leave you a complete mess, whether it was a bubbling one or a sobbing one, it was still a mess. But that was nothing new.

Your phone vibrated in your pocket. You braced yourself for another round of freezing your fingers off as you raised the device to your ear.

“Y/N, where are you?” Your best friend’s voice brought a part of you back into reality. “You were supposed to be here like ten minutes ago.”

“Jimin,” your voice trailed off. You tried to process where you were. “I’m... Lost?” That was your quickest answer.

“What do you mean you’re lost?” There was a hint of panic in his voice. “Geez, I need to stop letting you take public transit by yourself—”

“Sorry, sorry.” You cut him off. If he knew you still felt this way, he wouldn’t let you go around searching for trouble all by yourself. “I see the glass and garden museum—”

“Oh! Okay, go inside and wait in the gift shop. I bet you forgot your gloves today too.”

“... You’re not wrong.” He knew you too well. He always has.

He let out a slight chuckle. “I’ll be there soon.” He hung up.

You found refuge in the shop, weaving between customers and body heat. This city was so, so cold, and yet it never got cold enough to snow, just rain.

You stopped in front of a wall of postcards, thinking about all the times you’ve wanted to send one to him. You never knew his new address, so why did you have a stack of unset mail tucked away in a drawer back home? His name written all of them. Signed: With love.

The postcard’s design was a picture of one of the glass sculptures that hung from a window paneled ceiling. The mixture of orange and yellow glass popped out among the night sky in the background. You wanted to write to him then and there, asking for his opinions, if he’d like to see it with you one day. You knew he’d like it, or at least you hope he’d like it.

You reached for it, with your now warm hands and the goal of buying it to just hide it with the rest of the unsent letters. You instantly retracted your hand the moment it brushed against another’s.

“Sorry,” your voices came out in unison.

“No, I’m—” Your throat closed up for a second as your eyes met.

“Y/N?” His voice echoed in your ears. That voice that you thought you had forgotten, but remembered as if it were yesterday. The voice you remembered saying its goodbyes and you not realizing that was meant to be forever. “It’s been forever.” He smiled softly. “How have you been?”

“It’s been forever,” you repeated after him.

Forever. It wasn’t your choice to never see him again. It was his choice to never see you again. A choice that kept you up all night wondering if it was something you did or said for it to turn out this way. A choice that’d hit you out of nowhere with a whirlwind of emotions as you tried to enjoy an outing with your friends or while you were in the middle of a test you didn’t study for. And you thought it’d be this way. Forever. But forever decided it lasted long enough. And now forever was over. Now a new set of emotions overcome you. A confusing mixture of upset and gladness and maybe relief. You hoped the relief would last forever.

Somehow you managed to say, “I’m fine. Great, actually.” You swallowed. You felt the corners of your mouth twitching from how hard you’re actually smiling. And you wondered what this response was, but at the same time it was almost expected. You wanted to be upset, angry. And yet you’re here, smiling like an idiot, as if he didn’t move and disappear without a word for years. “How are you, Taehyung?”

Saying his name to his face felt so unreal. But this was really happening. You can hear your heart beating in your ears, your face getting hotter by the second, sweat building up under your clothes.

“I’m good. Life’s been treating me well.”

“That’s good.”

You felt his eyes on you, watching, analyzing. Does he know? Can he tell that you’re about to lose whatever is left of your sanity at any moment? It’s hard to tell what he was thinking. Was it always that way?

“Have you been inside the museum yet? It looks even better in real life.” He looked back up at the postcard. You could tell he was trying to make small talk. “So, who were you going to send this to?”

You. But of course you couldn’t tell him that.

“This is kind of… Embarrassing…” Your voice trailed off before you got the chance to spill your guts.

“Oh— You don’t need to tell me if you don’t want to.” He looked at the ground, smiling slightly to himself. “I guess this is kind of embarrassing too. I was actually going to get it for myself. I just collect them. I’m not sure when that started. And I don’t really have much of a reason to. I guess I just think they look cool.” He grabbed one off the wall.

Without thinking you took it from his hand. “I’ll buy it for you,” you blurted out.

“No, no, it’s okay!” He tried to take it, but you hid it behind your back.

“I insist.”

He towered over you, his face inching closer to yours as he attempted to reach around for the postcard. “Y/N,” he grinned. “It’s fine.”

You found yourself stuck, unable to look away from his face. Remembering the cute little mole under his eye, then the tip of his nose, and the one under his lips.

A child running by bumped into you and you fell forward. It wasn’t romantic like in those romcoms, you head-butted his lip and he retracted backwards, covering his mouth.

Your eyes widened. “Taehyung I’m sorry!”

“It’s okay. It was an accident,” he checked his fingers for blood. “I’m okay! I’m okay.”

“Sorry, I’m sorry. Okay now I definitely have to buy this for you, hold on.” You made a dash for the counter a couple steps away, nearly clipping another small child as they chased after the one who probably bumped you. You can hear Taehyung laugh as he trailed behind you.

You quickly made the transaction and handed over the card to him. “Here. I’m sorry, again.”

“What? You’re not going to write something for me?” He playful tilted his head.

You mumbled under your breath, “You’re killing me, Kim Taehyung.”

“Huh?”

“Nothing— Here, just— Ah. Did you want me to? I don’t have a pen…”

He held onto the postcard without taking it. “How about you think of something to write and then give it to me by the end of the day.” He nudged the card towards your body. “We’ll find you a pen later.”

“We? Later?” You didn’t want to look stupid in front of him, but you couldn’t help it. You quickly clenched your jaw after you realized you were staring at him with your mouth open.

“Yeah, later. Unless you have something else to do today?”

“Oh fuck, Ji—”

“Taehyung, who’s your friend?” An unknown woman walked up next to him, locking her arms around his. She glared at you so hard you could have sworn lasers would start shooting out of her eyes. She was beautiful. Of course she would be, it’s Taehyung.

He looked at you, but it felt more like he was looking past, maybe even through you. “She’s an old friend.”

You let out an awkward, almost forced laugh. “Yeah. An old friend. Right.” Right. That was all. Maybe a little more. Or could have been more. There was definitely more. But to him maybe you really were just a friend. Just a photo in an album at the bottom of an old moving box.

“Okay, well, we should be going now.” She began to drag him out.

You just watched him walk away. At least this time you already expected him to walk out of your life. It’s fine. This is fine. It’ll be fine.

He glanced back at you and stopped in his tracks. He gently detached himself from her and walked back over to you. He looked like he was trying hard to find something to say. Looking around as if the words would appear out of the air. He locked eyes with you once again, biting his lip. He really was thinking, but all he could come up with was a hushed, “Run.”

He had a wild look in his eyes as he grabbed your hand and bolted out of the museum, passing the girl he was with earlier. All you could make out was a string of some unkind names as the two of you darted out of earshot. He laughed the whole time. You ran for God knows how long before collapsing on a park bench. The cold air burned with each deep inhale. It hurt, but all you could do was smile.

As you tried to catch your breath you had to ask, “Who was that?”

“Just some girl I’ve been seeing. We met a few weeks ago at a coworker’s party.”

You’ve become more aware of how long you’ve been holding hands and you finally let go.

“It’s not serious though.”

You shove your hands back into your pockets, sitting up straight. “Why did you just ditch her? You’re on a date, right?”

He shrugged. “I’m not that into her. Besides, you’re way more interesting to hang out with.”

“How do you know that? It’s been three years.” You lowered your head to cover your face behind your hair. Your eyes stung, but now was not the time to be crying.

He hummed. “For starters, you nearly split my lip open, insisted on buying me a random postcard, and didn’t stop me from running away from her.”

You didn’t want to cave in so easily, but he knew how to make you smile. You can claim you hate it, but you secretly loved it. The part you hated the most was that he knew you loved it too. He still knew you so well.

“Y/N!” A voice called out from the distance.

You turned your head to the sound. “Jimin!” You shot up out of your seat. “Oh God, I forgot about him,” you mumbled under your breath.

He lightly jogged over. “Why did I just know it was you running out of the museum. I knew I should have just made you stay over at my place while you’re in town. What the hell were you doing? I told you to wait there and—” He finally looked over your shoulder. He grabbed you so fast you didn’t have time to react, shoving you behind him so that he kept you away from Taehyung. “What did you do to her?” His voice came out low.

“Nice to see you too, Jimin.” Taehyung got up with his hands outstretched for a hug.

Jimin stepped back, losing his balance for a moment as he stepped on your foot. “Ah— Sorry.”

“Jimin.” You gently put a hand on his shoulder. “It’s fine. I’m fine.” You tried to give him a reassuring smile. But was this really fine?

He sighed, loosening up. He cleared his throat. “Good to see you too, Taehyung.” He opted for a handshake instead. “Anyway, Y/N and I have somewhere to be. So if you don’t mind, we’ll be leaving.”

You grabbed your best friend’s wrist before he got the chance to walk away. “Wait.”

“What?”

You didn’t know what to say. You just wanted to cherish your time with Taehyung. Even if it was only for a second longer. You didn’t want him to disappear, although it was probably inevitable.

“Hey, I don’t mean to intrude. Sorry.” Taehyung apologized with a tone that was enough to nearly shatter your heart. “I’ll let you be on your way.”

“No. Wait. Please.” You raised your voice as you whipped yourself around to face him. Your head began to spin, your breathing was shallow. You weren’t ready to let him go. It’s too soon.

Please don’t go. Please don’t go. Please don’t go.

“Please don’t go.” You covered your mouth so quickly you practically slapped yourself.

“Y/N,” Jimin whispered, holding on to your shoulder as if it was like he was trying to stop you from shaking.

You held your breath, waiting, wondering what Taehyung will or won’t do.

Taehyung reached for your hands, uncovering them from your mouth. The look on his face. What was that look? You couldn’t understand how an expression could suddenly make you feel so full of love.

“I won’t. I’m here.”

“For how long?” You studied his face, searching for any indication he was lying while at the same time, trying to remember every part of it— the mole placements, the curve of his lips, the way his eyelashes moved as he blinked. Everything. Because you wanted to be ready for when the time comes he’ll leave you once again.

He looked confused. “What do you mean?”

“How long?” You repeated yourself. “How long will this last before you leave me again?” You stepped back, releasing yourself from his hold. “Are you just going to disappear again? Are you just going to leave me alone because I mean nothing more to you than just a friend? Well, friends don’t just up and disappear like that. Without a word. What kind of friend does that? I thought, maybe, I wasn’t just a friend to you. I thought I meant more to you. Like you do for me.”

You began to laugh in the middle of the silence. “Oh, God. I just sound so stupid and pathetic, don’t I?” Your lips quivered as you failed to attempt to keep your tears in. “That was so, so stupid—”

“Jimin,” Taehyung's voice sounded a bit annoyed. “You didn’t tell her?”

“I never got the chance to,” Jimin was frantic. “Now is not the time.”

“What were you going to tell me?” You rubbed your eyes, trying to see Jimin past the blurriness.

“Are you serious? You didn’t fucking tell her?” Taehyung bit his lower lip, trying to keep his cool, but it was obvious he was fuming.

“Tell me fucking what?”

“He told me to leave you alone—”

“Taehyung, shut up.”

“No! No! She needs to know.”

You grabbed Jimin by his coat, shaking him. “Why did you tell him to leave me alone?”

His face looked pale. “Y/N,” he sighed, brushing the little hairs away from your face.

You stiffened up.

“I couldn’t stand to see him with you,” he whispered, almost sounding ashamed.

“Why?” You couldn’t bear the silence, but you already have realized why.

“It’s obvious, isn’t it?” He caressed your tear stained cheek.

You stepped away from him in disbelief. “This isn’t really happening, is it? Jimin, I… I don’t even know what to say to you.”

“Tell me anything.” He accepted his fate.

You glanced at Taehyung. He pursed his lips, raising an eyebrow, his way to encourage you.

“I…” Your eyes settle back on Jimin. Somehow he looked so small, like he wanted to disappear. “I want to be angry with you. I guess I am angry with you. Could you not see how much I was hurting?”

“I did.”

“And you let me fucking feel this way for years?”

“I thought I could win you over. But when weeks turned into months then into a year, and then two, and three... I realized I wouldn’t ever win. It would always be Taehyung. It was too late for me.”

“And you?” You asked Taehyung.

“Jimin was my best friend too. And I didn’t want to get in his way.”

You laughed harder. You couldn’t believe this is where your life has led up to. For the longest time you thought you had done something wrong. That you were the selfish one. Selfish to think you could have someone like Taehyung.

You thought it was karma. You were the bad person. You made yourself out to always be the bad person and you couldn’t even remember what you did, but all you knew is that you deserved it. All those endless nights drinking your sorrows to failed suicide attempts. It was karma for mistreating yourself for all those years, even before Taehyung came into your life. Jimin finding you in the second year of high school, out cold with a bottle of sleeping pills in your hand, waking up to getting your stomach pumped. You did this to yourself because you believed everyone would be better off without you. God was punishing you, but at that point, you had forgotten over what, and it’s laughable.

But maybe you weren’t being selfish. What was wrong about feeling the way you felt? Liking someone? Loving someone? It was okay to love who you loved. You don’t need to be sorry about that. There’s nothing to be sorry about.

“I’m sorry, Jimin.” You said you weren’t going to be sorry, but you couldn’t help but think about all the times Jimin was there for you. This was your karma for everything you put him though, and you accepted his envy, his selfishness.

“You don’t have to be. I should be sorry. I just couldn’t make you happy.”

“Jimin—”

A sudden clash of thunder interrupted you, followed by heavy rain. There hadn’t been any signs it would rain, let alone a thunderstorm. But that was just expected of this city, unpredictable, just like everything else in your life.

Jimin took a step back, this interruption was just what he needed. “I’ll talk to you later. I promise.” He ran off into the direction he came from, disappearing behind the endless rain drops.

You looked up into the sky, feeling the water soak your hair. You closed your eyes and took a deep inhale. You wanted to scream. Then you couldn’t feel the rain on your face. You opened your eyes to find Taehyung shielding the both of you with his coat. He gave you a half smile.

“Let’s get you out of this rain?”

“Can I stay with you? I don’t want to be alone right now.”

“Of course.”

[isitreallyok]

Super Hero Time and My Very Own Kamen Rider Club

[A quick note before we get started here.  In this post and likely in all posts to come names of people in my personal life have been changed to maintain anonymity.] After last week’s heavy topic regarding the pressures of positivity, I thought it would be better to at least start this week off lighthearted. It’s very likely that the vast majority of the readers of this are going to be from the US and as such likely have grown up with or at least seen an episode of Power Rangers. While there are a lot of things that the Power Rangers franchise does that are beyond silly and seem absolutely ridiculous to many of us that see them as adults, the things that are presented in these shows seem absolutely incredible to their target audience. These shows are marketed towards children in case that wasn’t obvious.

Power Rangers is a nostalgic thing to watch for me and I still greatly enjoy it!

Well dear reader, I am glad we agree on that. I grew up watching Power Rangers and as time has gone on I have found that I still enjoy the monster fighting, transforming, masked heroes presented therein. There are even a number of series in the franchise that I have enjoyed even as an adult. Though as I have grown older, and in turn begun to use subtitles on everything I watch, I have developed a fascination with Asian television as a whole since it tends to feel vastly different from most of what is made available in the US. This fascination extends to tokusatsu television shows including but not limited to Super Sentai and Kamen Rider.

For those who aren’t aware, Power Rangers is actually based on the long standing Super Sentai franchise in Japan. Each week on Sunday mornings, similarly to the Saturday morning cartoons of yore, a television block called Super Hero Time airs. This consists of the most recent annual series for both Super Sentai and the annual series of another long standing series called Kamen Rider. Both of these play into the gimmick of transforming masked heroes that have a different theme with each season. Of late I have been enjoying watching episodes of each of these series with a small group of folks on Discord and let me tell you all about the joy of finally finding a group of lovely people that are interested in these series the same way I am.

Sounds like it’s time for a story. Shall we queue the “Long Ago In A Galaxy Far Far Away…” scrawl?

You know what. That sounds fun. Lets imagine this as an opening to a cinematic experience. Lets travel back to June of the COVID times, a mere six months that feels like it is 87 years ago . At this point depression had grabbed a hold of me and thrown me so deep into the pits of despair that I wasn’t sure where I was going to find a light at the end of the tunnel. I had just been through a breakup with my first girlfriend in four years, I was living at an extended stay with my father taking care of him as best as I was capable, all while sacrificing my own ability to take of myself and cope with the emotional break down that was happening as my social life and many of my friendships were falling to shambles.

Enter Kenshiro. I started interacting with Kenshiro on Twitter earlier in 2020 and saw that he posted a lot about One Piece (which I was actively catching up on at the time) and things in the tokusatsu genre. Eventually I noticed that he had posted about a small group of folx who ended up getting together on Tuesday nights to watch Sentai together. I managed to quickly, and very temporarily, overcome my social anxiety and asked if it would be possible for an invite to this group. Kenshiro had a “the more the merrier style” approach to this group and I was welcomed in with open arms. Thus beginning a journey that has lasted six months and is still going today.

I think it’s wonderful that you managed to overcome your social anxiety to get into the group, but don’t social interactions overwhelm you regardless?

Though I was able to get an invite into the server and start enjoying these watch parties with the crew, the social impact was still quite overwhelming. On any given night that we were watching Sentai shows there were between 14 and 20 people all typing (we mute our mics when we watch) at the same time and the wall of text that forms while there are four to six different discussions going on about the show was really overwhelming at first. I struggled to really feel like I belonged even though people were engaged and encouraging me with everything that I was talking about.

That all changed when Ex-Aid started up Rider Time on Thursdays. When I first joined up we were watching intermittent episodes of both Carranger and Gokaiger on Tuesdays and it was a blast. Carranger, the series that Power Rangers Turbo was based on, was easily the most 80s nonsense I’ve seen in a long time with multicolored jobber baddies that ended up being completely over the top and I loved every second of it. Eventually though we moved towards watching Gokaiger, a pirate themed anniversary season of Sentai, in its entirety. Once we moved to the stick to a single series and watch it all the way through it only made sense that someone would start up a different night for us to watch Kamen Rider.

This was originally an effort spearheaded by Ex-Aid to further the scope of the tokusatsu shows that we were watching as a group. We were running Sentai on Tuesdays, Kamen Rider on Thursdays, and Ultraman on Fridays. It was a wonderful time to have such an incredible community to surround myself with even if I was a little bit intimidated by the amount of interaction on some of the busier nights.

It sounds like a really nice time. How did you manage to overcome your social anxiety though?

Oddly enough, it came pretty natural to me when I started actually plugging myself into the Thursday night crowd. When we first began the Thursday night watch parties it started off with Kamen Rider Drive. This was a series that I had tried to get into before but never really managed to enjoy so I was a little hesitant to go through it because I didn’t think I’d enjoy it. Since we were only watching 3 episodes a week I figured I could carve out an hour and a half of my time to watch some stuff with like minded individuals even if I wasn’t the biggest fan of what we were watching. Guess what, it turns out that my gut reaction to the series was completely wrong and now I absolutely love it and am excited to revisit it when the show is a little less fresh in my mind.

The first few times I tuned in on Thursdays I was a little bit shy. I didn’t say much, I didn’t want to really engage because of the smaller atmosphere, and I sure wasn’t willing to divulge anything going on in my personal life to this new found group. Within two weeks that all changed. I began to joke around with people and participate in the call and response type stuff that we now do during opening and endings even if it’s just typing in all caps the English lyrics in the opening song.

I think the small environment really did wonders for my anxiety because since I wasn’t heavily invested at the start if I felt like I butted heads with any of the group I could have just politely backed out and stopped watching with that small group. By having this group of four to six other people instead of the routine fifteen to twenty that we were drawing on Tuesdays, in time, I felt much more comfortable putting myself out there and letting my voice and opinions be heard. In a very short time, I managed to get very comfortable with this small group and even was more confident and open during the Sentai streaming on Tuesdays with the larger group as well.

Though I absolutely adore the entirety of this community that has been built surrounding both One Piece and tokusatsu shows as a whole, I particularly enjoy the time that I’ve spent with my very own Kamen Rider Club!

Kamen Rider Club?! Frankly that sounds a little childish when worded like that.

It kind of does, doesn’t it? It is what we in the Thursday night crew call ourselves. It is also a reference to what the main cast of Kamen Rider Fourze call themselves. One thing that this weekly gathering of the fans has taught me it is that its okay to enjoy childish things. I’ve even bought myself some of the toys that have come from various Kamen Rider series as I have seen them during our very own show and tell segment where we all showed off our collectibles and various toys. So while yes show and tell is a bit of a childish thing to do it brought joy to our little group. The amount of serotonin I have generated in the last few weeks by playing with the aforementioned toys is astounding. Getting in touch with my inner child and remembering that it is actually rather fun to play pretend has been a real delight.

As adults, we often work ourselves day in and day out to take care of mundane tasks that are essential to our survival. We wake up, go to work, come home, make or order some dinner, eat, and then get ready for bed. I’ve chosen to add finding happiness in doing the things I wasn’t able to do as a kid to the list. Staying up late to find that next save point in a game, buying toys neither myself or my family could afford as a kid, watching nostalgic b movies that brought me some joy as a child, and following along with all the tokusatsu shows my heart can desire are just a few ways I’ve managed to embrace my inner child and cater to my own personal and emotional needs in doing so. There is nothing wrong with being a little childish from time to time. Doing this has introduced me to so many people that I never would have met otherwise.

It really does sound like you’ve managed to build yourself a group of friends here. Isn’t it pretty cool what can happen when you trust that others aren’t going to have your worst interest in mind.

You’re right. I let some people in and was actually surprised with the results. I absolutely adore this little crowd I’ve got. They have all done so much for me without ever realizing it and I am beyond appreciative. Ex-Aid started the KRC on Thursday nights and drops some incredible trivia all over the place. OOO and I have a ton in common and they are an absolute delight to talk to. I am always excited to see them pop into a conversation on the Discord because we tend to have a similar line of thought and form of humor we do have some differences in personal taste that account for unique perspectives and I absolutely love hearing about them. Epsilon and I both are not afraid to make lewd jokes about what we are watching. Tastefully of course. … Most of the time. Epsilon has also offered to be a conversation partner as I continue to get back to my study of the Japanese language! Zi-O has managed to convince me to revisit series I had otherwise written off because I didn’t think they would be of interest, but they managed to sell me on them so I now have an expansive list of series that I want to watch and a planned order to revisit them. Kiva and I aren’t particularly close as I haven’t done much to actually talk to them, but I’m excited to see things develop more in that regard because they seem like a really fun person to talk to. Finally there is Chaser. They are our newest member of our Thursday night group and they have managed to have me laugh so hard I’ve done spit takes. I appreciate each and every one of our little Kamen Rider Club more than words can ever say.

Quick aside and mushy feelings bit here, but if any the KRC are reading this I want you to know that you all have absolutely made 2020 better for me. We’ve had an incredible amount of laughs together. We’ve seen each other through being both happy and sad. Frankly, you all have reminded me that I do have people who I can call friends on days where I didn’t think there was anyone who wanted anything to do with me. I appreciate you, I absolutely adore each of you, and words can not express my gratitude for the warm welcome that I have received into this lovely community. You all have helped me grow as a person in ways that I didn’t expect going into this group. Shaking off my depression blues and finding confidence to embrace my love of these silly kids shows has been in large part thanks to you all. I love you all. Thank you.

Outside of our usual Thursday crew there are so many more people in this community that have put a smile on my face and some joy in my heart, but there is one other person that I would like to take a moment to express some gratitude for. Scipio was one of the first people I actually felt comfortable bantering with in the Tuesday community before the creation of our Rider Time segment on Thursday. They had an incredibly warm and friendly demeanor about them and naturally I didn’t mind bantering with them during the Sentai watch parties. After a while I followed them on Twitter and recently I reached out to them there and they were willing and able to listen to me when I was feeling overwhelmed about the state of chaos in my life and that alone solidified my feeling of being appreciated inside of this community. Thank you Scipio for taking the time to support a stranger and make them feel like they are a part of something bigger.

I’m so glad that you managed to find these people. It seems like they are really helping you in a lot of ways.

They truly are. The joy of it is that they aren’t even doing anything special. They are simply treating me like a comrade and that alone has done wonders for my self esteem. This year has been among the most challenging in my entire life for a myriad of reasons and just having this community to be a part of has honestly saved my life. I don’t know where I would be without them, but I do know that I would be a lot worse off.

So to wrap things up here for today I want to challenge my readers to do two things. Firstly take a moment to appreciate the people in your life that make you happy. If you feel inclined to tell them how much you appreciate them that’s great. If you just take a moment to reflect on it that’s great too. Secondly, I want to challenge everyone to embrace the things that might embarrass you if you talked about it to your friends with more conservative interests. Embrace the wild things that you enjoy. Don’t let anyone take the joy that these things bring you away. Finally as a reminder to all of you, you are stronger than you think, you are beautiful, and by goodness you are worth it. Lets go into this week ready to kick some butt and join some fandoms.

[cornacopicimagines]

fuck you parker │p.p

☆.｡.:*  

paring: peter parker x reader

words: 4.7k

warnings: PURE SMUT, swearing, rough sex?, oral (female recieving)

summary: Something about Peter makes y/n tick, something about y/n makes Peter combust with annoyance but at the same time neither one can deny the sexual tension but both are too prideful to act on it, that is until Peter is fed up and takes his anger out on her in a specific manner.

a/n: i did decide to make Peter & y/n eighteen so that they are of legal age but that doesn't mean everyone else around them is also eighteen.

masterlist

☆.｡.:*  

y/n sat in the cool air-conditioned room of her fourth-period English history class, she smiled contently to herself as she made a mental note that this was one of her very few favourite classes. Not because y/n liked learning about how poetry has evolved but because he wasn't in her class and by him, she means Peter fucking Parker.

The boy got her blood boiling in seconds even without provocation. Every time y/n would see that mop of brown hair she would feel something primal in her to punch his stupid face and Peter felt the exact same way. She wondered if he actually deserved her wrath and insults seeming that all her best friends can say about him are positive comments but then again he was probably putting up a facade around them. y/n forgot when their rivalry started, the only time she can recall starting their arguments was in second grade when Peter beat her in the monthly spelling bee that y/n always won up until then but it probably has been going on ever since the two of them officially met. Ever since then though, the two of them compete whenever they can, y/n would get the best of him and he would lose his shit and then he would beat y/n and then she would lose her shit. It was a constant cycle and a routine that every other student seemed to have memorised along with those two. Sometimes when the pair of them start bickering the teachers would place them at opposite ends of the classroom but that didn't stop glares and snide comments.

Then again, y/n couldn't deny that he was physically good looking. He was really handsome and sometimes she found herself staring at those bulging biceps that would stretch at the sleeves of his tight sweater and imagine what lay under it. y/n would try her best to avert her eyes as hard as she could but sometimes it felt like second nature to let her attention waft over to him even just for a moment. She felt almost ashamed of herself that she thought of him in such lewd ways but it did make for one hell of a session for her when he crossed into her mind and y/n didn't seem like the only one that had the same problem.

Peter was known as the hot nerd, somehow every girl in the school has had an attraction to him whether they acted on it or not or whether it was just acknowledging his features or actually having a romantic or sexual liking to him but every time he was confronted with a pretty girl asking if he was free on Saturday night he would politely decline and walk off as if nothing had happened.

y/n was considered one of the most popular girls in school, she was pretty, smart & had a figure to match, she worked hard and treated everyone with respect and kindness that is except for Peter obviously. y/n didn't really consider herself one of the aforementioned popular girls but she really couldn't care to try and change peoples mind and it did come with its limited perks and of course its downsides. Her looks got her places that they wish they didn't because y/n wanted to show people that she wasn't just an airhead that got advantages just because every guy wanted her to suck their dick and plus it would show Peter that she wasn't the ditz that he likes to call her every so often.

y/n stood at her locker, squished between a bulky footballer trying to get food out of his teeth and what y/n can only describe as a girl who hasn't gone through puberty even though she's seventeen. She shoved her thick textbooks back into her locker before making sure she had all her necessary items for Monday, y/n was looking forward to tonight's plans to lounge about on her couch with her sister and make the most of the valuable time that is a Parent-free weekend. As y/n fixed the stray hairs that fell out of her tight bun she took notice that the two drastically different people that locked her into a human sandwich had left, she wondered why they had rushed off that is until y/n heard the familiar locker be swung open.

"Parker, " she spat, not needing to look at Peter for her to know that it was him on the other end. This was a normal afternoon for the two of them, to bicker while they got their things before refusing to see each other until the inevitable next day.

"y/l/n, " he replied with a low gruff voice, god he sounded hot, she thought. y/n silently thanked whatever God was up there that she was behind this locker door to conceal her faint blush.

"What happen to you, " y/n asked sarcastically, "you sound like absolute shit," she said as she finished playing with the strands of hair.

"Didn't get any sleep, " Peter responded curtly, y/n frowned slightly knowing that he usually bites back but today he sounded tired and aggravated that she was even talking to him.

"Oh what a Greek tragedy," y/n mocked as she finally took her first look at him once she slammed her locker door shut, he looked as bad as he sounded. His hair was messy and ruffled, his skin was red and his right eye seemed to twitch slightly as he glared at her. She wanted to ask him what happen to him but her brain told her mouth to shut up before she could embarrass herself and give more material for Peter to work off when they met again. So, as usual, she went to give him a follow-up retort but was cut short.

"I don't really have the patience for you at the moment y/n, so if you could fuck off that would be fantastic," he snapped as he threw his bag over his shoulder and stomped off. y/n huffed in frustration as she followed his actions and stormed off to a nearby cafe that her friends were meeting up at.

She knew it was a quick walk to the cafe but it would take her some time to get back home so she whipped out her phone and texted her sister.

Meeting with my friends at the cafe will be home later x - y/n

Okay, having my partner for the school fair over now but we should be done by the time you get home - Terri

Cool, we still up for movie night tonight? - y/n

Nah, going to a party and staying Mia's after - Terri

y/n sighed angrily as she tucked her phone into her back pocket. She knew that she shouldn't let Terri go out to a party tonight and that if she did her parents would scold her but y/n knew if she fought Terri on it she would give her that stupid puppy dog look that y/n would have to say yes to.

Before y/n knew it she walked into the warmth of the cafe, her eyes scanning the small area before locking eyes with her best friend Gwen. y/n gave her a wide smile and skipped over and slipping to a sliver of a spot that Gwen had saved for her.

"Thanks, G," she said as she noticed a small bowl of colourful fruit salad infront of her. y/n didn't mean to let her frown creep up on her but before she could erase it with a smile Gwen took notice.

"Peter again?" Gwen asked through a bite of her food. y/n stared up at her through her long eyelashes and give her an exasperated look, "you know he's not that bad y/n." y/n scoffed at Gwen statement as she forked her food.

"Are we talking about Peter Parker," another girl at the table butted in, her short red hair was curled and her face was blushed at the same hue as her locks, "He's in my gym class and I wish he could live in between my legs," she giggled out as she twirled a piece of hair in between her manicured fingers. The comment almost made y/n choke on her food.

"I thought you weren't into, you know, nerds," Gwen retorted as y/n still stared at the girl in disbelief.

The girl scoffed softly, "Oh I am when they have an eight pack and look like a teenage bad boy waiting to come," she replied as she shoved another mouthful of food down her throat. y/n looked up at the girl with wide eyes, she wanted to protest what the girl had just let slip and tell her that Peter was a vile human but the rising heat in y/n was making her shut you up, causing you to become even more frustrated with your dumb feelings.

"You do realise he's a huge dick," y/n spoke up as she raises her eyebrow at this girl, she really didn't want to start an argument over a boy for what felt like the one-hundredth time that week but she said something to doubt her own flustered mind about Peter. The red-head looked unphased and went to tell y/n off but not before a brunette girl chimed in.

"He's a huge dick with a huge dick," she chuckled slightly, once again y/n felt her face heat up and in anger, y/n shoved her uncontrollably blushing face into her hands.

"I cannot seem to get this into you guys, he's a fucking douche," y/n spat as she starting to get frustrated with her friends' obvious thirst for Peter. Though she deflected all of her friends' comments, y/n's mind agreed with everything they were saying which made her even angry with yourself.

"I want him to get into me," the brunette spoke again, y/n thought her eyes were going to pop out of her socket as she watched her friends snicker at their comments and the reactions that they pulled out of y/n.

"I've lost my appetite," y/n exclaimed as she slung her bag over her should and reached for a ten dollar note and threw it on the table, she wasn't going to sit there and let her so-called friends make fun of her and her feelings.

She stormed out, lucky for her that the cool air seemed to combat the growing blush on her face. In minutes she stood on a crowded train as it shook and rumbling around. Her loud music dimmed slightly, indicating she got a text.

Are you alright? - Gwen

I honestly don't know - y/n

I hate defending them but they were just teasing - Gwen

y/n hesitated to text back for a moment but another ding cuts her out of her trance.

Be honest with me, do you have feelings for him? - Gwen

y/n's fingers hover over her phone's keyboard as she tried to rack her brain for an answer that was honest enough to conceal the rest of the iceberg. She did want to tell Gwen all her problems that she had with her emotions but y/n wasn't ready, she still hadn't even admitted to herself yet.

It's complicated, I despise his guts but I can't help but feel something else - y/n

That's totally fine, just make sure you don't hurt yourself in the process - Gwen

Love ya - y/n

Gwen replied with a simple kiss emoji. y/n didn't know she needed that, she didn't know that she needed that slight realization that maybe there was something there at least on her end and if was just her that she could protect herself.

By the time she had arrived her desired stop and walked to her front door, it had been 30 minutes since she had left in a huff and y/n felt guilt in her. Maybe she shouldn't have left, at least not like that, she was more dignified to be acting like a rash child.

She went through the multiple ways she could have dealt with the situations as she unlocked the front door, the lovely warm air wafted over her features as she shimmed off her coat and threw it on the rack next to her. "Terri, I'm home," she called out, no response. y/n quirked her eyebrow and stopped her movements "Terri?" She questioned as she directed her voice upstairs at Terri's room. For a second time, Terri didn't respond, y/n sighed angrily as she stomped up the stairs. "How many times do I have to tell you," she was no yelling as she swung open Terri's door and saw the very last person she would ever want in her sister's bedroom.

"Oh, y/l/n you're home early," Peter spoke with a wide smirk on his face as pulled the earplugs from his ears and turned around to face her. y/n couldn't see her face but she knew she was red with anger and her eyes were probably trying to jump out of her head.

"What the fuck are you doing here?!" she shouted as she literally ran towards him in a fit of rage, Peter continued to sit unphased in the desk chair. "And in my sister's room no less!"

"Calm those lovely tits y/n," Peter laughed her rage off cooly which only made her more furious.

y/n grabbed Peter by the collar of his shirt and brought his co close to her face, she was afraid their lips would touch, "As everyone knows, I'm not dumb so cut the shit," y/n growled "why the fuck are you sitting in my sister's room?"

"I'm her partner for the fair, dipshit," Peter responded with the exact same tone as her, but he stood up from the chair making sure never to pull his face away. y/n stumbled back slightly as Peter grew to tower over her.

"That's a total lie, you just want to get into her pants to piss me off," y/n spat, her anger levels rising the more he open that stupid mouth of his, at the same time y/n tried to control the growing wetness that was slowing forming in between her legs the closer he got to her.

Peter threw his head back in laughter, y/n stared at him in shock. "Ask her yourself sweetheart," he told her, y/n didn't get a chance to retaliate because a familiar voice spoke up from behind her.

"y/n, you're home early," Terri said happily as she walked past her and flopped herself on her queen sized bed. Terri caught sight of y/n's frustrated state, "What's wrong?"

"What's wrong?!" y/n chocked out, her attention drifted from her sister to Peter, "You have Peter motherfucking Parker in our house."

"And?" Terri stared at y/n like nothing was wrong like the air was so thick between y/n and Peter that it was basically a fog. y/n stared at like Terri was the dumbest person in the world and to her, she 100% was.

"Why is he in our house?" she asked with sternness in her voice, her eyes still burned holes into the back of his head.

"Oh, he's my partner for the fair, " Terri smiled sweetly. Peter looked at y/n with a wide smile as he watched her stormed out and slam the door behind her.

☆.｡.:*

y/n sat on her messy bed, her loose hair sprawled out and her mind following the beat of a song. Her eyes glanced up to the clock hanging above her tall desk, it had been an hour and a half since Peter intruded.

She sighed heavily, her toes barely touching the carpeted ground. y/n picked up on a door being slammed, most likely the front door. Before she could rush up and make sure Peter tripped on his way out but a harsh knock came onto her door.

Thinking it was Terri, to let y/n know that Peter had finally gone she didn't think twice for opening the door. y/n eyes met with his once again.

"What the fuck do you want, " y/n spat, her arms folding underneath her chest, causing Peter to take a quick glance down.

"Your sister told me, you're having problems with the calculus homework, " the smug asshole wore a proud smirk as he leant against the doorframe.

"Well she's a liar, " y/n retorted with a soft snort as she rolled her eyes at him. Peter felt the familiar annoyance that always made itself know when she was near him, why does she have to be so fucking hard to work with? he thought.

"Don't be fucking difficult y/n," he grumbled, not really in the mood to fight with her for what felt like the 200th time that very day.

"Don't be a dick Peter," y/n bit back as she too felt the rush of anger swell inside her again.

"Don't be a brat," Peter retorted as he took a step closer to her, his emotions acting quicker than his brain.

"Don't be an asshole," y/n, too, took a step towards him. Their faces incredibly close for both of their liking but both were too worked up to even notice the proximity of their boiling skin.

"Don't be a bitch," Their words now getting more vulgar as the longer this heated argument continued. y/n wanted to slam the door in his face after hat he had just called her but she was not thinking properly, like him being near her caused her reasonable side of her brain to completely out of function.

"Don't be a fucking douche," Her eyes now shooting daggers straight at him, her attention watched intently as his focus drifted from her gaze down to her snarled lips, to her flushed skin and finally to her blatant cleavage that Peter thought was begging for him to play with.

Peter took one last look at her enraged expression and took a chance, "Fuck it," he muttered lowly before he leant forward and encaptured her lips with his in a rough movement. y/n stood there motionless, her eyes wide ad her muscles locking in place. y/n felt her brain scream at her to pull away from him but if she was honest her sexual frustration was telling her to pull him closer and confirm all those comments her friends told her earlier.

So she lifted her arms and draped them over his shoulders, pulling him in tighter in her grip. Her hands played with the soft hairs at the nape of his neck and drew small circles at the tip of his back, moaning slightly every time her nail would rack over a bump indicating a defined muscle. Peter moved into her bedroom, his palms squeezing harshly on her hips as he guided her to the front of her bed.

Peter's fingers starting playing with the waistband of her loose gym shorts, his digits aimlessly wondering over her pelvic bone. y/n palms drifted higher on his scalp, her own fingers were now entangling the wefts of brown curls. She pulled away breathlessly as she quickly undid the small number of buttons on her already half exposed shirt, "This doesn't mean anything Parker," she barked as y/n disregarded the shirt and made work on her pink lace bra, easily letting it fall to the floor.

Peter didn't listen to her at first, too much in awe of her body. Boys always talked about her, about how she looked underneath the clothing, how much would her tits bounce if she was on top, Peter just got validation for all the rumours about her.

"Of course," he complied, as he soon starting stripping, now he was down to his underwear and matched y/n. She stared down at his toned figure, damn it, they were 100% right. "Even though you are incredibly hot, I'm still extremely mad at you," Peter explained, "Get on the bed."

"Excuse me," y/n coughed out to hide her growing want. Peter stared at her like she was dumb.

"I said get on the bed," he repeated, slower this time. y/n obeyed him, crawling onto the bed and giving him a gorgeous view of her ass before she lay flat on the mattress. Peter climbed atop her, he reconnected his lips with hers again as her hands pulled her arms above her head before clamping her wrists down with one of his hands. y/n simply moaned into his mouth, quite happy as she lay underneath his complete unable to do anything. Peter's tongue racked up against her teeth, he pulled his lips away from hers with a soft pop before placing them on her neck biting at the skin. "Is this okay?" Peter asked through long kisses, y/n nodded her head vigorously.

His free hand trailed down, tickling the bare surface of her belly, playing with the lace trimming of her underwear before he reached into her. His digits rubbing her softly, painting figure eights on her clit as he continued to press kisses to her blushed skin. "Please," y/n whimpered as the short jolts of pleasure wasn't cutting it. Peter stared up at her, his face contorting into a growl.

"You're not going to say a fucking word until I tell you," he pulled away from her complete, y/n felt her heart drop but quickly jump into her throat as she felt his literally rip her underwear in two, the ripped material flung onto the floor. y/n almost lept for the sky when she felt him blow cool air onto her folds. "Your voice annoys the hell out of me."

"Could say the same to you," she exclaimed sarcastically as she threw her head back into the pillows. Her comment was met with one harsh slap to the underside of her ass, y/n stared down at him in shock. Peter didn't give her anything as he continued the tease her hole, his fingers dancing over all the areas she needed him.

"Keep your hands there," was the last thing she said before he delved in. His tongue lapped and expertly circled her swollen clit, his fingers slid in and out of her hole slowly but surely, his lips sucked and her folds collecting her wetness. Peter made sure to never get out of sync, when his digits came out her sucked a little hard and when he dug his way back in he curled his finger upwards causing y/n's back to arch.

y/n desperately wanted to touch him, in any way she could, she just needed her hands all over him as he ate her like a full course meal. She hadn't like this in ages, her eyes rolled back into her head, moans pushing themselves to the brink of her tongue and yet it was someone who she despised who was giving her such much satisfaction. Peter glanced up at her and noticed she was in a train of thought and sped up, pumping his fingers faster and harder and he softly nibbled at her bundle of nerves. y/n felt it building up inside her, the tingling sensation at the very pit of her stomach as it became harder for her to contain her breathless whimpers. Peter also took notice to her approaching orgasm and made sure to give her one last finger fuck before he retracted from her.

"Fuck you parker," she growled as y/n watched him fumble around the room. She wasn't completely sure why he was checking her floor but she took this as an opportunity to finish herself off, so she trailed her hands down her sweating body. Before she could give herself the release she needed, Peter's palm came down hard and fast onto her sensitive cunt making y/n entire body spasm with pleasure.

"What did I fucking say," Peter spoke harshly as y/n heard his tear open a condom packet, her eyes still shut from the sudden pleasure. Peter stared down at her, he smiled wickedly to himself. She had her eyes closed and her eyebrows were somehow cutely furrowed, her tits lay against her chest with small beads of sweat adorning her skin. He did this to her, he made her feel good.

Without saying a word to her, Peter quickly slipped on the condom and dived into her. y/n's legs instantly wrapped around his waist as he lay dormant in between her tight walls. Peter wonders how such a sour girl could have the most sweetly divine pussy, but that wasn't his focus now. He pulled out of her slowly before slamming right back into. Each time he did it, Peter quickened it. His knuckles stabilized him but laying on either side of her as he fucked her.

Peter could stay inside her for days, the way she would jump every time their skin met, the way her walls released him at the perfect time before snugging him back as he slid in, it was heaven. "Holy shit," he chanted as Peter tried to keep his rhythm up but sometimes failing miserably with the overload of pleasure he was obtaining. Peter looked up at y/n, he felt the urge to give her permission to speak, to scream his name. "Tell me how good this feels."

"So-so good," y/n stumbled, her mismatched tone connecting with the pounds of his hips.

"You can do better than that," Peter told her as he started to slam harder into her, he knew he was leaving marks and he loved it.

"This feels fucking fantastic," y/n stuttered as she pulled at the sheet of her pillows. Her face tucked into the corner of her elbow as she tried to contain her what she felt as uncontrollable moaning.

"'Atta girl," Peter complimented. y/n felt his dick slid into her tight entrance only to have his balls stain her skin with red marks after he pounded her back into the mattress. Finally, y/n felt her orgasm riding, the beautiful feeling making its presence known to her.

"Peter, I'm gonna cum," She told him through heaves of pornographic moans. Peter nodded his head quickly.

"I know," he sped up again, the only thing you could hear is the sounds of mixed groans and loud whimpers and hot, raw skin slapping against one another, "I am too."

And with that, she came. Her release hitting her like a ton of bricks, she felt her body tense up and her mouth emit a loud scream of Peter's name. Her vision went black momentarily as she felt the wave of pleasure wash over her. Seconds later, Peter released as his head fell into the crook of her neck as he pours into the rubber. Slowly, he slid out of her, their combined juices almost dripping out of her tight hole.

Peter peeled off the condom and threw it in the nearest bin. y/n watches him saunter away from her, she wonders if they'll do this again. They must, that was the best sex she ever had and she doesn't mind staring at a completely nake Peter Parker. "Are we doing this again?" she pipes up, it's worth a shot. Peter swivels around to face her, he genuinely doesn't know how to respond to her question. He is completely down for another session of getting lost in that paradise of a pussy she's got but he knows that she hates his guts and he thinks the worst of her.

"Do you want to do this again?" Peter responds as he collects his clothing from her floor.

"I do, but that's all it can be," y/n told him, pouting slightly as she spots her ripped underwear, they were her favourite. "Beside the next time we fuck, you need to buy me new underwear," she giggled slightly as she snatched her broken underwear and threw it at him.

"Deal y/l/n."

"Deal Parker,"

☆.｡.:*

i'm so sorry, i rushed the last part of the smut