#not to rain on anyones parade but yeah

[idliketobeatree]

something something societal standards of beauty forbid women being casually hot after hitting like, 35. and you can mostly get away with being attracted to a normal adult woman when you justify it through a male gaze originated kink I guess

normalize sexualizing that old woman without having mommy issues. maybe i don't want to be her pet because i'm traumatized. maybe i want to be her pet because she's hot. you ever think of that.

[pleasespellchimerical]

Vent post incoming:

It's legit hard for me to see all the Dragon Age 4 hype, knowing how the artists were treated. And I don't think I'm going to be playing it.

It's easy for me to avoid Ubisoft and Actiblizz, primarily because I don't give a shit about any of their products. But Bioware was a massively talented studio once, and their bad practices have hurt so many of their employees. Employees who created the things we love, employees who put so much of their love into those creations, and got fucked over anyway. It sucks to see people maltreated and good art put in the crosshairs of crunch and profits. It shouldn't be this way.

Bioware as we knew it is dead. And seeing all the hype about the new game just leaves such a sour taste in my mouth.

(I have such mixed feelings about Dragon Age anyway, and I'm not going to elucidate them here, because the fandom has set that dumpster on fire and burned it into slag several times over. But despite those mixed feelings, there are things about Dragon Age I genuinely love. This is an ugly sort of mourning for me.)

[daisywords]

I think D&D is good and fun but it bugs me a little bit how people sometimes seem to generalize D&D rules and aesthetics and archetypes across the fantasy genre in general. Like that's just one thing. stop saying all of fantasy when you just mean D&D-adjacent.

[cosmicoceanfic]

incredible how my utter apathy about a Rey Skywalker movie is still somehow managing to gently nudge me towards finishing my Vader defects AU

[phagodyke]

okaaaayyy finally watched I saw the tv glow :^)

[snekdood]

my siblings are such dumb assholes that they really think its coddling when my parents would SOMETIMES comfort me after they would fuck with me or bully me or try to scare me or some shit. like no dude, you're just an asshole. why can't you just fuckin face that already instead of constantly deflecting, fuck.

[bobigleux]

So the pjo tv show....

[sunrizef1]

Baby Blue

Pairing: Logan Sargeant x fem!reader

Warnings: Slight cursing, not edited

Word count: 3.8k (this was supposed to be short 😭)

Summary: Logan had just misspoke, shouldnt have been a huge problem, right? Wait, what do you mean he said he had a daughter? And is that his girlfriend?

Authors Note: Surpise, not a whiv chapter but instead, an uncharacteristically sweet fic.

Logan had fucked up. Royally. And he knew that, which is why, the second the words had left his mouth, he was grimacing, gaze quickly switching over to Oscar who was sat a few yards away with wide eyes.

It was the United States Grand Prix. Austin, Texas. Logan had been put on the media panel that day since he was the only American present and had the most connection to Austin, Daniel Ricciardo not included.

By pure luck or maybe by sheer will, Logan had been sat next to Oscar, both grateful to have a friend next to them. Fortunately, on Oscar’s other side was Max, a driver who’d always been respectful toward the American. Lewis completed the quartet, another driver that Logan wouldn’t have to worry about in terms of kindness.

When the panel started, almost none of the questions were for him. He’d expected that, he wasn’t exactly having an overwhelming season. Especially compared to the joys and successes of the Red Bull world champion or the unexpected high-placing finishes of the Aussie next to him. And his woes were nothing to write home about when placed next to the declining team performances from the 7-time world champion and future Ferrari driver.

So, as he had expected, most of the questions were asked to his left.

But he’d been put on the panel for a reason, and eventually an America-related question did arise, signaling that maybe he would be of use today.

“Good morning,” the reporter calls out toward Logan and he smiles with a nod toward the darkness where the reporters are all sat.

“Morning.”

“How’s it feel to be back racing in America? You have any family or special guests in the garage this weekend, giving you that extra boost?”

Oscar nudges his knee with his own, causing Logan to let out a small laugh as he glances over. He actually did have some special guests in the garage, not just his own family, who’d come from Miami for this, but also, you, his Fiancée. And his 4-year-old daughter, of course.

Your entire family lived in Texas. So whenever you werent following Logan around the world, you landed back home in Texas, the family home being the best place for your daughter to grow up. It helped that your parents loved her more than the world, constant presents being rained down on the little girl every time you’d bring her. He hadn’t seen you in about two months, not having had a time to come back to America since summer. So having you in his garage for the first time in a while was all that much more of a motivator for him.

He raises the microphone to his lips to say a paraphrased version of that, your relationship not being a very public one yet. Logan wanted to get the wedding done before he paraded you around, not wanting to add the stress of the public on your already existing stress from wedding planning and taking care of your daughter.

“It’s always great to get back home, you know? Uh, got to stay with some family out here for a few days, got some good southern food in me, which was great,” Logan laughs lightly, watching as the reporters grin widens, “And it always feels different when you’ve got important people in the garage, cheering you on. People who don’t usually get to make it, so that’s really nice.”

The reporter nods as Logan puts his mic down, but she raises hers to further the questioning, “Anyone specific? A lot of people were curious about a few different people in your garage.”

Logan nods, your family was pretty well known, especially in Texas. You weren’t famous or anything, but you’d grown up like Logan and when people have that type of money, their names get spoken pretty often.

“Yeah, some close family and friends. You’re probably asking about the l/n’s and I, um, knew them growing up so it’s really nice to see them out here supporting me,” Logan pauses slightly. The internet was pretty sure he had a girlfriend, not that he’d confirmed anything. It wasn’t hard to figure out though, as he almost never shut up about you. But it wouldn’t hurt if he mentioned having a girlfriend, right? Everyone already knew that anyway, it couldn’t do too much damage, “My girlfriend’s here, as well. Really happy to have her here, she hasn’t been to a race in a while.”

Oscar snorts, making Logan glare at the Aussie. Oscar knew you were more than his girlfriend, having been present at the engagement. He also knew Logan was leaving out a key family member in his list, a certain baby being completely unmentioned.

“Well it’s always nice to have your family, right?” The reporter nods with a kind smile, jotting something down on her notebook.

Logan nods with a matching smile, eyes shining as he thinks about you and your family in the garage, “Yeah, and I mean, my daughter-“

Logan pauses, stomach dropping as he takes in the slip-up. He glances over to Oscar whose eyes are wide with shock, mouth dropped open slightly. Max leans forward to lock eyes with the American from Oscars other side, eyebrows furrowed. Lewis looks his way as well, but his expression is soft as he takes in the younger man’s evident embarrassment.

Logan had fucked up.

His cheeks are bright red as all the eyes in the room stare at him, questioning looks on their faces. Logan laughs slightly, rubbing the back of his neck as he looks back out toward the reporter who’s now wearing an incredulous smile, “Shit.”

This breaks some of the shock in the room, laughs ringing out from in front of him. Logan shakes his head with another embarrassed laugh, “My girlfriends gonna be so mad at me.”

Logan drops the mic next to him, reaching his hands up to shield his face in order to avoid some of the embarrassment. Oscar, still laughing, reaches over to pat him on the back, his free hand stifling the laugh threatening to escape his throat.

Luckily for Logan, they run out of time before the questions can get back to him and the surprise child he just revealed he had. He’s quick to rush out of the room, only pausing to allow Oscar to catch up before he’s gone again, practically running to Williams.

He can hear Oscar struggling to keep up behind him, shocked laughs occasionally echoing out as he runs.

“Logan- Come on, slow down man!” Oscars calling out toward the blond, Logan continuing at his fast pace. He only slows when he makes it to hospitality, Oscar slamming on his brakes in order to avoid crashing into the taller mans back.

Logans eyes scan the room in search of you, Oscar reaching a tired arm up to rest agaisnt the distressed Americans shoulder.

Oscars groaning as Logan walks off, apparently having caught sight of your family.

“Hi, Mrs. L/N,” Logan says shyly as he walks up to your mom, a sheepish smile painted on his flushed face. Your mom turns toward him with a smile but after taking in his guilty demeanor, she looks at him suspiciously.

“You’ve known me for 18 years and you’ve never called me Mrs L/N,” your mom looks your fiancé up and down, eyes narrowing as she catches sight of an equally nervous Oscar, “What did you do, Logan? And why did you drag Oscar into it?”

Logan laughs nervously, glancing back at Oscar who ducks his head, looking away from the interaction, “Do you, maybe, know where y/n is? It’s important.”

Your mom pauses, suspicion still rolling of her in waves. But, sensing Logan’s urgency, she nods, “She’s in your room with Nat.”

Logan can’t help the smile that shows at the mention of your daughter’s name, sighing slightly with relief, “Thank you, I need to go talk to her.”

Your mom just nods, watching as Logan starts to walk quickly away, moving toward you in his room. Oscar moves to follow but your mom is calling him back before he can take a step, “Stay here, Oscar. Let him go, you’re going to tell me about the season. Either that or you’ll be the one to tell me what Logan did.”

Oscar, having had plenty of conversations with your mother while growing up, sighs, accepting his fate, “It’s been good.”

Logan, though, has made it to his room, opening the door quietly as he reaches it. He smiles once he looks inside, being met with you dancing around with your daughter, music playing from your phone on the table. As the door opens, your daughter looks over, a grin breaking out on her little face as she practically lights up, “Daddy!”

Logan grins as your daughter jumps up, sprinting over to jump into her dad’s embrace, giggling as he lifts her up into the air, clutching her gently to his chest, “Hi, baby. You having fun with mama?”

Your daughter nods, smiling brightly as she turns to look back at you, “Yeah! Me and mama went to see the cars and they let me sit in it! I wanna be a driver like you, dad.”

Logan grins, looking over to where you’re stood, a small smile on your face as you watch the interaction. When you catch Logan���s gaze on you, you speak up, “They let her sit in your car. They told her about how her daddy races every weekend and she decided that that’s what she wanted to do. She said you’re the coolest person she knows, now.”

Logan laughs, warmth filling his heart as you recap your daughter’s words, “Just don’t tell her Oscar races, too. Can’t have her thinking he’s cooler than me.”

You daughter looks up at the statement, confusion crossing her face, “Uncle Os drives fast too?”

Logan hums, nodding as he sways, your daughter resting her head on his chest, “Yeah, he does. He’s not as cool as me, though.”

You daughter hums, “I think he’s pretty cool.”

You laugh, moving toward the father-daughter pair, a serious look crossing your face, “He is, baby. Do you want to go see him so I can talk to daddy?”

Logan grimaces but lets go as your daughter nods, letting you set her down. She wraps her small hand around one of your fingers, swaying happily at the idea of seeing her Australian uncle.

You push the door open to go find Oscar but when you look up, you see Oscar’s already stood there. He looks exhausted and Logan knows that a conversation with your mom was no doubt the reason why.

“Uncle Ozzy!” Your daughter’s small voice calls from below you, causing a bright grin to burst onto Oscar’s face as he picks her up, the small girls hands immediately moving to push against his face. Oscar laughs, moving an arm to support the small girls weight as she pushes his face around.

You smile at the pair, laughing as your daughter grasps Oscars hair in her small fists and pulls gently, just watching as his head rolls around, “Can you watch her? I have to talk to Logan.”

Oscar smirks, glancing over your shoulder to see Logan standing sheepishly, “Someones in trouble.”

You hum, small smile on your lips, “Can you just hang with her for a minute?”

“Yeah, I can,” Oscar says, smiling down at your daughter in his arms, “Anything for my favourite American.”

You hear Logan mumble “rude” under his breath, warranting a snort from you as you watch Oscar walk away, no doubt about to parade your daughter around to anyone who'd listen.

You turn back around, coming face-to-face with Logans grimacing form, “Saw the panel.”

Logan winces, rubbing his hand along the back of his neck, “Yeah?”

You hum, stepping across the room to reach your fiance, “Mhm, I did.”

“Im sorry,” Logan sighs, looking anywhere but at you.

You can't help the small laugh that escapes you at his clear distress. Logans head snaps up, confusion crossing his face at your apparent glee, “What?”

“Im not mad, Lo,” you laugh, wrapping your arms around his neck. He stares at you, a puzzled look stuck on his previously fear-stricken face.

“You’re not?”

You smile up at him, shaking your head, “I mean, it's not how I would’ve wanted to announce it but I don’t mind too much.”

“Really?” You giggle when you catch the relief on his face, his shoulders dropping dramatically.

“Mhm,” you tangle one of your hands in the hair at the nape of his neck, his head tilting slightly back into your touch, “It was nice to be private for a while during the engagement. We didn’t have concrete wedding plans and Nat was so young. But the weddings basically planned and Nats old enough to handle herself in public, I think it’s a really good time, actually. Do you want to say something official?”

“I will, but until then I’d be happy to not have to hide you guys,” Logan grins, a hand reaching up to grasp the side of your face. You blush as he presses a soft kiss to your forehead.

“That sounds lovely,” you say, untangling yourself from his hold, “But, for now, I think you have interviews to attend to.”

“Yeah, yeah, I do,” Logan replies, but his gaze is still locked on you, love filling his eyes, “I’ll see you in a minute, I love you.”

“Love you too, Lo. Go do your interviews,” Your soft smile shines, lighting up your face.

Logan nods, moving to exit the small room, stopping to send you another grin. You laugh, pushing him out of the room, the door sliding closed behind him.

He moves on practical auto-pilot, feet carrying him to the media pen, thoughts of his family stuck on his mind. He reaches the pen quickly, spotting a group of about 8 drivers all huddled together in a chat. He thinks about walking the other direction but Max spots him first, gesturing for the younger driver to walk over. Logan agrees reluctantly, making his way to his fellow drivers.

“Logan!” Max calls, a smile on his face as he greets the Williams driver warmly.

Logan nods, smiling at Max politely, “Hey, Max.”

Max grins, throwing an arm around the blond driver, “How are you doing?”

Logan hums with a small smirk, knowing exactly what Max was eluding to, “I’m great, actually. Thanks for asking, Max.”

Max tilts his head with a wide smile, raising an eyebrow, “Yeah?”

“Yeah, I mean, you know how my morning went.”

Max seems to catch that Logan’s allowing him to publicly address the situation in front of the other drivers, turning his attention to the slightly confused drivers around them, “How’d the Mrs feel about it?”

“She was fine with it,” Logan smiles, “Honestly kinda happy to be open about it.”

“I didn’t know you had a girlfriend,” Lando says from across the small circle, a confused look occupying his face.

Logan shakes his head lightly, arms crossed across his chest, “Fiancée, actually. Been engaged for like a year now.”

This sends a wave of shock around the group, Daniel being the only one to pipe up, a huge smile on his face, “I know what this is about!”

George turns to the VCARB driver, a questioning look laying beneath his dramatic sunglasses, “What are you talking about?”

Before Daniel can explain, a high-pitched voice yells out from behind Logan.

“Daddy!”

Several drivers turn, being met with the sight of a small girl sprinting her way toward the group, a smiley Oscar trailing along behind her. The girl giggled as she approaches her father, skipping along happily as she gets near him. Logan leans down, opening his arms to let her walk into his grasp. She wraps her arms around his neck and Logan holds her tightly as Oscar stops behind him.

“Hey baby,” Logan says to his daughter as he looks down at her, “Have a good time with uncle Osc?”

The small girl nods excitedly, grinning as she looks back over to the man she’d spent the past 15 minutes with, “Ozzy took me to the orange garage, um, papaya I think actually, and I got to sit in another car!”

Logan hums, running a hand through the girls hair, trying his best to swipe it back into place, “Yeah?”

“Uh huh, it was really fun!”

Logan smiles, turning back to thank Oscar for looking after the girl. He turns back around, catching the gaze of about 8 different F1 drivers, all with varying levels of shock painted on their faces, “I don't know if you guys saw, but, um, I accidently revealed i had a daughter this morning and, um, this is her?”

Max is the first to laugh, having already been through his shock about the young girl currently attached to her father. Logans face heats as the drivers stare, Nat burrowing her head in her fathers neck as she tries to discreetly glance at the men around her without having to make any eye contact.

“Congrats, man,” Daniel grins, moving over to clap the younger driver on the back. Logan chuckles slightly as your daughter finally moves her head away from him, her curiosity at the Aussie overtaking her shyness.

The honey badger smiles at her, nodding his head. She smiles gently, reaching a small fist out toward the man. Daniels eyes widen at the gesture, eyes glancing between the girl and her outstretched arm before he reaches his own hand up to fist-bump hers. She nods with a satisfied smile, turning back toward Logans neck.

“He’s kinda cool, I think,” She mumbles and Logan smiles glancing over to see if Daniel has heard her words. Based on the increased grin on his face, Logan figures he had.

The rest of the drivers take their turns congratulating Logan on his fatherhood and introducing themselves to the small girl, her favourites being Daniel, Max, George and Alex, who she’d already met in the Williams garage over the past few months.

Eventually, all the socializing caused her to fall asleep against her father's chest, her tired eyes slowly drifting closed. Logan sways slightly, trying his best to soothe her in her slumber.

Once she's fallen asleep, he turns to Oscar, "Do you know where y/n is?"

Oscar nods, "I think she'd fallen asleep when I went to drop Nat back off. Didn't want to wake her so I just brought her over here."

Logan nods, glancing over to see the other drivers getting pulled into interviews. He didn't want to wake you, knowing how little sleep you'd been getting lately with all the wedding planning and your daughter. Anyone else in your family would be too hard to find on such short notice.

So, when his pr officer calls him over to do interviews, he holds Nat a little bit tighter, hoping the interviews don't wake her.

He smiles at the shocked interviewer as she hands him a microphone which he holds in his free hand, trying his best to support your daughter with one arm.

"Morning," Logan nods, voice low.

The interviewer nods slightly, shaking herself out of her shock so she can ask the American some questions.

"Good morning!" Logan thanks his lucky stars as the woman catches his drift and tries her hardest to stay cheerful while keeping her voice relatively quiet, "I had a couple questions about the panel from this morning but it seems you've answered them yourself before I could even ask."

Logan laughs, glancing down at his girl before bringing the microphone to his lips, "Yeah, my girlfriend was asleep and I didn't want to wake her so this girl is joining us today."

The interviewer smiles warmly, "Before this I saw she was hanging out with some of the other drivers?"

"Yeah, yeah, she was. She, uh, had a good time getting to meet some of the grid. But, you know, all the socializing tired her out."

The woman in front of him nods again, glancing over his shoulder at who Logan knew to be Max, getting asked questions across the pen, "How'd they react?"

"I think they were pretty surprised, you know? I don't think a lot of them saw the panel from this morning and even then, I didn't really give much of an explanation. Don't think Max even believed me until Oscar brought her over," Logan laughs, grinning lovingly at the girl starting to stir in his arms.

"Hi baby," Logan says gently, watching as the little girl rubs at her eyes, trying to pull the tiredness from them.

"Hi Dad, where'd Ozzy go?"

Logan glances over his shoulder, looking for the Australian in question. He eventually sees him, turning his body so Nat can see him as well,

"Uncle Osc is just over there, angel."

The girls nods, a frown still on her face from having to wake up, “What about Maxy?”

Logan grins, happy that his daughter was already comfortable with his fellow drivers, even going as far to seek Max out. Logan turns straight around, pointing behind them at the Red Bull driver, "He's there. And Danny's next to him."

The girl nods, a satisfied look on her face as she spots her new friends. Logan turns back to the interviewer, the grin not leaving his face.

Max, meanwhile, is in the middle of an interview when he notice the interviewer looking over his shoulder. Max looks at the man in front of him with a confused look, the man quick to explain.

"Think the newest addition to the paddock is looking for you, Max."

Max looks over his shoulder to see a small girl, chin resting on her dad's shoulder as she stares back at Max. When he turns to see her, she grins, moving a small hand to wave excitedly at the driver before moving to tug at her father's hair, looking for his attention.

Max grins, waving back as Logan looks over, indulging the girl. She laughs happily, getting even more excited as she spots Daniel beside him.

"Maxy! Danny!" Max looks beside him and sees that Daniel hasn't noticed your daughters yelling and he quickly leans to the side, poking the Aussie. Daniel turns to the side to see what Max wants but is instead met with Max pointing vaguely across the pen. Daniel glances over and grins when he sees Logan and his daughter, the smaller of the two waving hurriedly at the pair of drivers.

Daniel waves back, a grin practically splitting his face. The interviewer sends him a questioning glance and he laughs lightly, "Seems we've got a new cheerleader, then."

The interviewer laughs, quickly returning to the questions. Max, after waving bye to your daughter, turns back as well.

Your daughter, now properly noticed by her new favorite drivers, turns back around, letting Logan get back to his questions. She wraps her arms around his neck gently, smiling in satisfaction as she leans up to tell him something.

"I like your friends, dad."

Logan smiles warmly, happy to see her getting along with his coworkers, "I'm glad, baby."

———————————————

@casperlikej @evie-119

[dizzyduck44]

So let me get this straight. This weekend

Lewis makes some sarcy comment about Lando losing the lead in the sprint.

Lando leads race start to last corner, dragging his teammates arse round in his DRS the whole way, to then gives up the win on the line against team orders.

Stewards went for a tea break during quali, arrived back for Q3.

Max gets given a single place grid drop, losing pole.

Max goes on the war path with George, squares up to him on the drivers parade, (insert swear word of choice where you think appropriate) “I hope you and your FIA buddies are happy”.

Oscar cuts the pit white line in front of Lewis and is under investigation before the cars make it to the grid. 😡

Race starts, Lewis jump starts, Lando nearly takes the lead at the first corner.

Esteban (who unbeknownst to anyone was driving his last race for Alpine) collides with Franco in the first corner.

Two corners later Lance Stroll drives into Alex and gets a 10 second penalty and 2 penalty points.

Lewis gets a 5 seconds penalty for the jump start.

Liam then gets a 10 second penalty and 2 penalty points for causing a collision.

Maybe from earlier contact Alex’s wing mirror decides to go solo and sits on the start finish straight.

FIA has a meltdown. They turn the pit straight into a disco light, yellow/green/yellow/green/yellow/green/yellow/green. Double yellow. We select double yellows. No back to single yellows. No we really think this should be a double yellow.

Meanwhile drivers are pottering around, Max is pumping in fastest laps, race continues until Valtteri takes out the mirror and makes a bad situation 30 times worse.

The FIA have to do something now right?

NO.

Because by now Max wants the world to burn and has started screaming he doesn’t think Lando lifted during the flag Hokey Cokey.

Well Max they ain’t got time to care about that, because Lewis and Carlos now have punctures.

Someone at the FIA remembers they employ a safety car driver for a reason and send him out.

Safety car goes through the pits so the debris can be moved. (This option was available to them 10 minutes earlier) and Lando nearly runs into the back of Lewis who suddenly slams on.

Calm decends for a few laps. Until. Yeah it’s Max again. “Anything from that yellow flag?” (Remember this later).

Safety car is coming in, cars seem confused about when Max will go. Max and Lando are on the radio saying the safety car lights are still on. Lando’s team tell him they aren’t.

We start racing.

Hell breaks loose.

The stewards decide that Lando didn’t lift during the double yellow, despite the fact they didn’t know what flag to put out, and it changed as he passed the sign. 10 second stop go penalty and 3 penalty points.

Now I am well aware there will have been people watching who have never even heard of this penalty. Apparently the last one given was 2018. For comparison, the FIA gave Max a 5 place grid drop for the same offence at the same track last year. The same year they allowed a tractor and Marshalls on the track in the pouring rain with no flags.

Lewis gets a second penalty, this time a drive through, again don’t see many of those, it’s normally penalty added to your race time. By now I swear they are just looking for penalties they haven’t handed out yet this weekend.

And a 10 second penalty and 2 penalty points for Alex for causing a collision as well.

Sergio also gets investigated for dangerous driving.

BUT WAIT

We then give George a 5 second penalty and a penalty point for driving too far behind the safety car.

Post race Max continues to rant about George and how he effectively begged for the grid penalty and decides now he was asking about Lando as he thought “he had got DRS from a back marker” and wanted to be sure that was why he caught up. Note earlier comments he asked TWICE about.

Lando with zero context of what the world has just seen, takes it hard and thinks he is responsible for the whole shit show.

Oscar gets given a reprimand for his earlier pit lane incident.

Ted Kravitz has confirmed that the lights on the top of the safety car did in fact go out. But the drivers can’t see them because of a spoiler on the back of the car! The ones underneath did in fact NOT go out.

AND THEN

Fans have found Ferrari might not have lifted during the double yellows either!!!!

Seriously when pissed off fans are more on top of data than the stewards, what is even the point?

The FIA need to realise they are there for the safety of the drivers, teams and spectators. This is the point the teams need to band together and address the FIA, what were you doing for 8 minutes with debris on the track? You’ve handed out one of the harshest penalties for a situation you created. Two drivers had punctures because of a situation you created.

Honestly I know Esteban won’t be on the grid in Abu Dhabi, Lewis seems to have zero motivation to do it. Unless you are McLaren, Ferrari, RB or Alpine do you even care about this race?

Seriously so many errors were made in the running of this race today I would say strike it from the record, but Zhou and Sauber got points!!!! And that would be far too cruel.

But I leave you with this thought. The FIA can stop a race and abandon it due to poor driving standards. Does this go both ways? Can drivers stop and abandon a race for poor stewarding standards? Today would have been a strong candidate.

[pixlokita]

Bro you go ahead and draw Cassie and Gregory being friends together! Anyone who tries to rain on your parade are just jerks who should draw their own stuff instead of whining about ‘canon’. Block ‘em if you gotta! We’re all here to have fun, not excuse our fun.

HECK YEAH 💖

[strwrs]

like it would’ve been so much better if they started in the past with everybody on brendok. those four jedi knights, and osha and mae and their family. we learn more about them, see who they are. we get to see the fire and what happens (just enough so there’s still mystery). and then maybe we see osha training at the temple. we get to see some of her journey as sol’s padawan. then we cut to present day. maybe we see osha as a meknek. maybe we know why she left the order, and maybe we don’t. then at the very end of the episode it’s revealed that mae is still alive, and we get to learn a little bit about her master or even the philosophy behind what she’s doing.

i get that the mystery is important, and they can’t reveal everything just yet, but the mystery would be way more intriguing if we had more information.

i feel like the first episodes of the acolyte would’ve been much more impactful if they’d started by letting us get to know the characters, so we could care about them.

[thepigeonhasapen]

🍇SFW A-Z: Dionysus!🍇

Gonna do one of these for everyone, but I'll start out with everyone's favorite high-functioning alcoholic first! 🥂

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Highly. I mean, this is Dionysus we're talking about. If he hasn't touched at least ten of his friends by mid-morning, he's either having a really bad day or somebody else is pretending to be him and you should probably figure out what happened to the real Dionysus. Back-slaps, hugs, lazy post-drinking snuggling; Dionysus loves them all. If he has a lover, you can bet he's pulling them up to sit in his lap. Pray that you are not big or strong enough to pick him up because, if it's been a while since you've seen him, he can and will do that thing were he runs and leaps into your arms. If he's bigger than you, he'll grab you around the waist and spin you around. Either way, someone's getting picked up.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

You'd think a requirement for being Dionysus's friend would be a love for parties, but that's not quite true. All you have to do to be Dionysus's friend is literally be just any degree of a chill. We're all here to have a good time, right? Raining on anyone's parade is a good way to get on Dionysus's bad side. Or at least make him slightly pissy with you. His one hard requirement for an absolute best friend though, would have to be loyalty. Stick up for him. Don't talk shit behind his back. Maybe hold his hair back while he throws up. Yeah, he's the party guy but he's not just the party guy, you know? His best friend would have to stick with him even when he's not at his best. And in terms of reciprocity, Dio is great. Absolute gossipy bitch. Always in your corner. Will make time for you if you're having a problem. Expect lots of hanging off of you while he brags about how cool his bestie is to everyone who even vaguely looks like they're listening.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Pretty sure I already went over this one, but Dionysus is an absolute cuddle monster. Doesn't even have to be with a romantic partner. My man is the KING of platonic snuggling. He gets especially clingy when he's extremely wasted, but even when he's more sober (because come on, he's never completely sober,) he has no problem with just laying back and having a good cuddle.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

Does Dionysus ever want to settle down. Does the god of festivities and merriment and madness ever want to settle down. What do you think? Crazy partying is kind of his thing, here! That being said, I feel like Dionysus can cook crazy well. He's picked up a lot of little tricks from all the different people he hangs with. But cleaning up after himself? I mean, his personal chambers on Olympus are pretty tidy but that's mostly because he's never there.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

People might get mad at me for this one, but here goes. Dionysus is all about good times. You know what's not a good time? Break ups. If he's no longer interested, he won't say as much, he'll just... stop hanging out with you until he's full on ghosting you. He hopes you'll get the hint so he doesn't actually have to have a conversation about it and bring the whole vibe down. If he's no longer feeling the relationship, it's likely that he no longer likes you at all, so if a confrontation is forced, Dionysus won't be kind about it. He just wants to get it over with. Gods are fickle. He's fickle. He just wants to get back to the things he enjoys already. Look, nobody ever said he was the god of healthy relationships.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Would Dionysus marry? I mean, maybe? It would depend on how serious he is about the relationship. He's had lots of spur of the moment "marriage" ceremonies. But if he actually does love a person and really, truly knows that he wants to be with them forever, then, yeah. Dio's putting a ring on that.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Depends on how much he likes you. Dionysus is always gentle, physically at least. He's aware of his strength and knows he can be a bit much so he makes sure to rein it in. Even when play-fighting or wrestling, he tries to keep a handle on his strength. However, verbally, Dionysus can be a bit blunt. He will try to be as nice as he can, but he's not known for beating around the bush. If there's something on his mind, he'll bring it up. That being said, you can whole-heartedly believe any compliment he gives you because he's not known for lying just to be polite.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Hugs are just standing cuddles, of course Dionysus loves them. I feel like he goes in more for a quick side-hug though or an arm around your waist or shoulders. He wants to be touching at all times, but he'd also like to have a hand free to do stuff, y'know? And that stuff totally isn't hold his wine glass. However if you really need a serious, down-to-earth hug, Dionysus gives the best ones. He's warm and he knows how to hold on just tightly enough and he'll plant little kisses on the top of your head. It also doesn't hurt that he always smells lovely; of grape juice and flowers and spices.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

Yesterday. Last week. He's already said it. Dionysus loves everyone. It won't be by his words that you'll know that you're close with Dionysus. It'll be his actions. When he leaves his party to come check on you because he noticed you were gone. When he goes out of his way to get you things he knows you like. When he shows up to visit you at odd hours because something weird or cool happened and he has to tell you about it immediately.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

It takes a very specific scenario to make Dionysus jealous. He's very open with his relationships and believes that monogamy is really overrated so if you want to flirt with someone else, by all means! He'll even be your wingman! But jealousy? He'll really only get jealous if you're hanging out with Apollo over him. Like, hello??? That bitch is already the golden child, does he have to have you too??? Gets quite grumpy and pouty when he's jealous, but can be assuaged very easily with kisses and affirmative words. He may pretend to be mad for longer though. Just so he has an excuse to ask you to make it up to him, if you know what I mean. ;)

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

His kisses get sloppier the drunker he is. Dionysus is never one for chaste kisses so you can only imagine what he's like when he's absolutely wasted. Lots of tongue. Accidental teeth bumps. It sounds awful, but he does it with such passion and experience that it definitely makes up for it. Also I hope you like wine because you're constantly going to be tasting it on his mouth.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

I feel like Dionysus is good with kids. He just seems like that kind of guy. Chill. Patient. Granted, he'd probably let them try a sip of whatever he happens to be drinking so maybe keep him an eye on him, but other than that? You could definitely choose worse gods to watch your kids. As for his own kids? I actually cannot decide if Dionysus would be a crappy father or a great one. He really could go either way. On the one hand, I feel like he'd be great at supportive talks and hugs and cute family activities. On the other, I can't see him being all that consistently available. Sure, being a dad might be fun for a while, but sooner or later, he's gonna get antsy.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Let's be real, he doesn't actually need sleep, but unlike some of the other gods, he's crazy down for all of life's little pleasures, including naptime. So it's pretty hard to consistently spend mornings with Dionysus. He usually crashes just wherever he happens to be, so unless you're actually physically with him at the time, you won't be seeing him until like noon. He has no problem sleeping in a proper bed with you if you ask him, though. If he loves you, he'll make time to include the things you like in his life, and if that thing is sleepy snuggling, hey, he's down. Don't expect him to get up first though. My man loves his lazy mornings.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Ha, what do you think? He will, however, sometimes blow off his feasts just to have a chill night in with you. Couldn't say why but he seems like a stargazing guy to me. Also I feel like he'd LOVE it if you read to him. But do be prepared for him to interrupt every five seconds with commentary.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Dionysus is a very chatty guy. Talk to him once and you've probably received an exhaustive list of all the sexual partners he's had in the last week as well as anything interesting he's done or seen. Despite that, it takes a very specific scenario for Dio to get into the mushy stuff. I can really only imagine him talking about his personal problems in rare quiet moments or if you need an emotional pick-me-up and he has something you might be able to relate too. He's not one to hide his feelings, but he also doesn't want to bring down the vibes with his issues, you know?

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

You can count on one hand the number of times you've seen Dionysus genuinely mad. Sure, he gets irritated sometimes and lashes out a bit, but he really is a live and let live kind of guy, and the amount of times he gets really upset is quite low. The only thing that'll badly set him off is people hurting his friends or the ones he cares about. Pretty much everything else is a flare-up hot, cool-down quick situation, if he gets angry at all.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

Attentive as fuck. Dionysus remembers pretty much everything you've ever told him, even if it didn't look like he was listening at the time. He loves you. Of course he's going to be paying attention to everything you say. Wouldn't mind being put on the spot about it either. Quizzing each other about how much you remember about each other would be a fun game for him. Can't remember? Gotta drink, man. Those are the rules.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

He loves every moment spent with you, but the one he loves the most, the one that he really loves but will never tell you out loud, is the one where you just sat with him. It's not often that Dio doesn't feel like partying, but he'd had a bad series of days and he just... didn't feel up to it. But you stayed. You didn't even do anything special. You just hung out with him. Dionysus isn't usually self-conscious, but everyone's got their insecurities and Dionysus sometimes worries that you only want to hang out with him because of his merriment side. It's good to know he can relax a little around you and let you in on his bad days, rare as they are.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Dionysus isn't exactly hovering over you with a steak knife, but he is quite protective over his friends. He's an absolute petty bitch and won't hesitate to mess with anyone who even looks at you strange. If you tried to protect him, he'd genuinely find it sweet even though he obviously physically can't get hurt. If you lied to protect him, he's one of the few Olympians that won't straight up kill you dead for it. I mean, he'd still rather you just told him if there was some problem but he thinks it's really precious that you were worried about him and his feelings.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

He doesn't put a lot of effort into his gifts, but somehow they're still thoughtful. Then again, he doesn't really have to put in effort. He's a god. He can just get whatever the hell he wants at a moment's notice. Not to say he doesn't adore you or the time you spend together, Dionysus is just very spur of the moment. He will however, occasionally put together a big ado for you on your birthday or your anniversary or if you did something cool and he thinks you should celebrate. If you're not the partying type, that's okay too. He'll put a cute little dinner together and you can have a casual hang-out with just him. Will probably playfully tease you about how lucky you are to have his full attention. Tease him right back. He'll love you for it.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

Well, the constant drinking for one. Does kind of come with the territory. He's also extremely gossipy and will talk about people behind their backs, including you. If he likes you, it's usually not negative but uh... all of Olympus knows about your sex life. Sorry. Another big flaw of his is that, similar to most of his family, he has trouble taking no for an answer. He wants to do what's best for you! He wants you to be happy! Unfortunately, he also thinks he knows better than you do what's good for you and it'll take more than a few times of this going badly for him to ease off a little.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

About average all things considered. He's not exactly checking himself out in the mirror every five minutes but he does like to look nice. Definitely wouldn't mind if you stroked his ego a bit by complimenting him on his appearance. Do be mindful that he will return the favor, and if you say anything vaguely negative about yourself? Well. Good luck. Hope you enjoy Dionysus going over every inch of your body and explaining how much he loves it for the rest of the day.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Would depend on both the intensity of the relationship and how it ended. Something he considered just a hook-up won't break his heart, but if you were close? Losing you would absolutely destroy poor Dionysus. He'll close himself off from the rest of the Olympians, as well as his followers, and just kind of mopes for a while. Once he's finished with that, he does come back, but he's not the same. He'll be a lot moodier and willing to give in to his darker impulses, for example smiting his followers if they disrespect him. You are not responsible for the way your partner behaves post-breakup, but uh, that doesn't really apply when you're dating a god. This is a lifetime commitment. Please don't break up with him. He's not as bad as some of the other Olympians but like. He's making people believe their loved ones are grapevines here. Even if you don't love him anymore, you kinda need to take one for the team, man.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

Would secretly love it if you're not as much the drinking type as him. He'd never admit it (unless he was both really out of it and really close to you) but he does sometimes worry about what kind of stuff he gets up to when he's blackout drunk. He doesn't think he'd do anything too bad, but it's nice to have someone that can actually verify that he didn't. Maybe it’s his mortal side or maybe it's just who Dionysus is a person, but he tends to actually feel bad about the mistakes he's made and is somewhat anxious that he'll hurt someone when he's too under the influence to use his better judgment. You probably won't be able to stop him, but you can remind him what happened when he's feeling more himself and he can try to fix whatever it is he's done.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

An excessive love for violence would be a hard turn-off. A little bit is fine, but if you're running around killing people left and right, he's considerably less thrilled. Look, he'll even hook you up with Ares if you want, just keep the wanton murder away from him, 'kay? Kind of hard to have feasts when all your guests are afraid of the serial killer. Also I feel like he would not get on with people with a touch phobia because he'd take it as personal insult.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

Being a god, Dio doesn't really need sleep but he still likes doing it. Doesn't snore, but probably does drool. Definitely wraps around you like an octopus in his sleep. And I hope you have good bladder control because Dionysus is the single deepest sleeper in the world. You are not getting this man off of you until he wakes up by himself.

[littlekiara96]

I really don't like to rain on anyone's parade.

And maybe people simply don't care. Which is more than fair.

But hot Skott with the yellow sharp eyes is a lie. (I mean, it's simply a mod. I just like being overdramatic because I'm a fool~)

But yeah, he's got brown eyes, actually... and they aren't almond-shaped (is that what it's called? I think it is. They're not "hot sharp makes the girlies go feral on sight"-shaped, is what I mean).

DOES NOT CHANGE ANYTHING ABOUT HOW I, TOO, WANT HIM TO BARK WHILE WEARING A COLLAR AND-

[waevrs]

ᴄʟᴏꜱᴇ ᴄᴀʟʟ

Pairings: ShieldAgent! Natasha x ShieldAgent!Fem! Reader

Summary: Part two of compromised. Y/N recovers quickly from her injuries but she finds out something about Natasha that could put their relationship at risk. What will happen?

Warnings: Mention of abuse, Injury mention.

Parts: 1 // 2 // 3

My eyes opened and slowly adjusted to the sudden light and the plain walls of the med-bay.

Not dead yet.

I groaned and sit up as someone burst into the room.

"Oh, thank god! I-We thought we lost you." Tony panted and embraced me in a hug. He had become like an older brother to me during my time here.

"Not to rain on your parade or anything but," he pulled away abruptly "Fury said you're off of missions indefinitely."

"What?!" I yelled, despite waking up for the first time in who-knows-how-long.

"He said that you're too reckless and you're always getting hurt so having you on the field is a liability." He revealed, scratching the back of his head.

"What the fuck?!" I growled, throwing my head back into the pillows.

"Hey, I'm only the messenger." He raised his hands in surrender. Just then, Bruce walked in with his clipboard and asked Tony to leave. I jolted up in the bed and swung my legs off of the side.

"I see the way you look at Romanoff." He mouthed to me. I flipped him off and he winked before strutting out of the door.

"Are you alright? No pain or discomfort?" Bruce asked. I shook my head no. I wanted nothing more than the comfort of my warm bed.

"Really?" He asked, unusually shocked.

"Yeah, why?" I chuckled, taking a sip of the water that was on the table next to me.

"You were out for 4 weeks."

"WHAT?!" I spat out the water that was in my mouth. Bruce passed me a napkin and I wiped myself down.

"And during that period I noticed something...off about you." He announced. I look at him confused and he continues.

"Your body seems to have double the amount of cells a normal human has...Maybe that explains why you don't feel your injuries." He started to ramble. Before I can say anything he interjected.

"Do you mind if I do some tests?"

"Uh...Sure." I muttered, unsure as to why he still wanted to test me after finding that out.

In about an hour or so, Bruce wrapped up all the tests he wanted to do on me and was taking them down to the lab, leaving me to drown in my loneliness.

"Hey Bruce, where's Nat?" I asked him before he left.

"Uhm..." He stuttered, surprised by the sudden topic of Natasha "She's on a mission."

"Oh, thank you."

He sent me a small smile and walked out of the room. I sighed and decided to ask JARVIS where exactly she was, seeing as she was injured she shouldn't be allowed to go on another mission.

"Hey JARVIS? Can you find Natasha for me?" I spoke into the air.

"Miss Romanoff seems to be on a stakeout mission with her boyfriend." The A.I replied.

"Would you like me to let her know that you're awake?"

"Uh, yeah. Sure." I murmured.

Boyfriend? How come I didn't know about her boyfriend? I guessed Tony didn't know either or he wouldn't of said, well mouthed, what he did earlier. There was a stabbing pain in my heart and I hated it. I was actually very much in pain from my injuries so this new pain in my heart made it ten times more unbearable.

"JARVIS, one more thing. Call Tony."

"On it Miss L/N."

"What's up pipsqueak?" I heard Tony's voice echo in the room that I was in. I heard things clanging in the background so I guessed he was in the workshop.

"Did you know about Natasha's boyfriend?" I whispered. It was quite embarrassing that I was asking.

"No, I just found out. Why? Are you jealous?" He pouted teasingly.

"I-No. Did she say anything about me? You know, when I was out?" I asked and tried to hide the smile that threatened to break onto my face.

"Aww is little Y/N is love?" He continued to tease.

"Tony." I deadpanned as a warning.

"Yeah, yeah fine. No actually. She hasn't spoken to anyone but her boyfriend and spent the last 3 and a half weeks locked in her room, a little like you really." He told me, occasionally grunting due to working on something.

"Oh..."

"Personally, I think you should just ask her out." He added and although I can't see his smug face, I can tell he was smirking.

"Riiight. Because you're suddenly the connoisseur of love." I rolled my eyes, sarcasm lacing my voice.

"So you are in love with her!"

"Tony! I am not!"

"You totally are! I can hear the giddiness in your voice!"

"Ugh fine! I am in love with her! Okay?" I gave in and announced. I was a little shocked I came out to him like that. I always pictured it over a fancy dinner or something.

"Wait...you are? I-I was kidding." Tony sounded, utterly confused. He was probably scratching the back of his head, something he did on the rare occasion that he got confused.

"Yes. I like her, a lot." I sighed and retreated to my pillows, stuffing my head in them.

"I don't know what advice to give to you, pipsqueak." He muttered under his breath.

"Don't say anything, I'm coming to you." I decided, pushing myself off of the bed and hobbling towards the door, clutching the stitches on my abdomen. How I got that wound? I have no clue.

"No! Wait! You can't get up-"

"JARVIS, hang up the call."

I sighed and limped my way down to the workshop. Pushing open the door, I said something before he did.

"I know, she's in a relationship and I should of told her before but I don't think she's gay, Tony."

"Ohhh she's gay alright." Tony chuckled.

"No, she told me- How are you so sure?" I asked and took a seat beside him while he was working on a suit.

"Trust me. I have good gaydar." He assured smugly.

"Tony. You have to be gay to have gaydar. You're a straight man in a straight- wait..." I began.

"..."

I looked up at him in shock.

"TONY! WHEN WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME?!" I half-yelled, jumping up and down like a little kid.

"I wasn't because I'm with Pep." He mumbled shyly, which shocked me because this was very unlike him.

We talked about how we found out we were gay, well bi in his case, and people we thought were definitely closeted. He brought up Natasha and I immediately brushed that off and told him all the times I've flirted and she completely freaked out.

"Definitely closeted." He nodded.

"Tony." I looked at him disappointed. Why does he think that?

"I'm just saying!" He defended "Maybe she freaked out on you because she realised she has those feelings for you and she doesn't know how to deal with them."

I hummed to let him know that I was listening and he continued.

"It happens to the best of us. Maybe she thinks that the team won't accept her."

"So that explains why every time I flirted with her she went and slept with any random man in the same night." I huffed sarcastically and raised my eyebrows.

"Yeah, actually. She could be trying to block out the things she feels for you because she's scared what the others will think." He suggested, finishing up what he was working on.

"The big bad Black Widow? Afraid what other people think of her? Bullshit." I scoffed. I couldn't believe what Tony was trying to say.

"She may seem like a heartless bitch, but honestly she's a big softie." He laughed and I couldn't help the smile that broke onto my face.

"Aww you're smiling." Tony teased me for like the fifth time that day.

"Shut up." I pouted and hit his shoulder playfully.

A comfortable silence set between us. Well, silence apart from Tony's AC/DC music playing in the background while he worked. I sat in the chair swinging my legs until he handed me two bracelets, one that lets me bring up JARVIS' database to help me with cases, and another one that allowed me to equip my new suit with the press of the button on the bracelet.

"Woah, thanks Tony. I don't know what to say." I thanked him and gave him a hug.

"Thank me when you and Romanoff are together." He winked at me and went back to working on something. That man was always working.

"I'll see you later Tony." I smiled and hobbled my way out of the workshop and back to where I was supposed to be, the med-bay. I turned the corner and continued on my way.

"Babe. I told you I'm fine. I dealt with them, didn't I."

My head shot up when I heard her voice. She was battered and bruised and obviously hurting but she was being as stubborn as always. My eyes then travelled to the man who stood next to her.

And I froze.

I couldn't believe what I was seeing. Natasha was with him of all people.

All the memories came flooding back, what he'd do to me if he didn't like what I said.

I never would have thought that I would end up dating him. It began with passion and excitement, just like any other romantic relationship. The relationship, however, developed down a dark and sinister path that I could not have anticipated.

At first, he was kind and considerate, admiring and flattering me. But he quickly began to show his true colours. He became obsessive and domineering, insisting on knowing every detail of my existence. He shut me off from my friends and family, making me feel like he was the only person I had left. He slowly destroyed my confidence by criticising my accomplishments and making me doubt my worth.

The emotional abuse was relentless. He manipulated my emotions, making me feel guilty for his own shortcomings and failures. His words cut like knives, leaving me feeling small and powerless. I became trapped in a cycle of fear, always walking on eggshells, afraid of setting him off.

As the relationship progressed, the abuse escalated to physical violence. His anger would explode without warning, and I would bear the brunt of his rage. The bruises and scars I carried became a painful reminder of the pain he inflicted upon me. I lived in constant fear, never knowing when the next outburst would occur.

Leaving him was one of the most difficult decisions I've ever made. The process of breaking free from his control was filled with obstacles and challenges. Even after we ended the relationship, he continued to harass and stalk me, invading my privacy and making me feel unsafe.

Rebuilding my life after such a traumatic experience has been a long and arduous journey. I've sought therapy and support to heal the emotional wounds and regain my sense of self-worth. It has taken time to learn to trust again, to believe that I deserve love and respect.

I'm still trying to wrap my head around the fact that Natasha was dating...

My psycho, abusive ex.

[aflippedflop]

FLIPFLOPPED NAME INTERACTIONS

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Naming the fallen works identically to how it does in Undertale, but I thought it could be fun to add more name easter eggs. :]

[O] - Usable Names

[X] - Unusable Names

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[O] "FRISK" - WARNING! This little shit will drive you insane. Proceed anyway? (Enables Hard Mode)

[O] "ROONEY" or "ROONIE" - ". . . I see."

[X] "MADDIE" - "No. NO. NO! THAT'S MY NAME, BRAT!"

[O] "DUMMY" - "ABOUT TIME YOU REALIZED IT!!"

[O] "METTA", "MTT", or "TONTON" - "OOO~ PROMOTING MY BRAND ARE YOU DARLING?"

[X] "LEGDAD" - "SORRY DARLING, BUT THAT ALREADY MY NAME. IT SAYS SO ON THIS MUG. (ALPHYS GET ME A MUG AND A MARKER)"

[O] "HAPSTA" - "YOU CAN HAVE THAT NAME, DARLING. I DON'T NEED IT ANYMORE."

[O] "NAPSTA", "BLOOKY", or "BLOOK" - "oh... that's my name... i don't think it'll hurt to let you use it."

[X] "ALPHYS" - "H-Hey! Don't do that!"

[O] "ALPHY" or "ALPH" - "Umm. I guess that works???"

[X] "UNDYNE" - "Nuh-uh! Get your OWN name, snotface!"

[X] "PAPYRU", "PAPS", OR "PAPY" - "WOWIE! WHAT AN AWESOME NAME. THOUGH I WOULD RECOMMEND CHOOSING A CODE NAME TO USE INCASE WE'RE IN THE SAME ROOM!" (Makes you go back to the menu.)

[O] "sans" or "lazymf" - "i doubt that's your actual name, but who am i to rain on your parade, i guess."

[X] "ASGORE" - "I wouldn't want to wish this name on anyone. Please pick a different name, young one."

[O] "GOREY" - "You must be serious about this. I suppose this wouldn't hurt anyone."

[X] "TORIEL" - "Perhaps you should try picking a different name, my child. Come on, think!"

[X] "TORI" - "Uh, you are... getting the right idea, I think. But maybe try something else."

[X] "ASRIEL" or "AZZY" - "In your dreams, kid! First come, first served."

[X] "FLOWEY" - "Sorry pal, I already chose that name!"

[O] "FLOWEE" - "REAL creative solution."

[X] "CHARA" - "Demons can not be named the same name. Try again. =)"

[O] "MUFFET" or "TUFFET" - "Alright dearie, don't worry, I'll just put it on your tab~ (WARNING: THIS ENABLES TAX PAYER MODE. YOU WILL BE BROKE.)" (You start the game with -9999 G.)

[O] "SOURPU" - "Little buddy, This name is already giving me hell. Please save yourself and pick something else."

[X] "NICEZ" or "NCG" - "Sorry buddy. I'm not taking sponsors right now."

[X] "NICEE" - "Plagerism isn't very nice, buddy. Try something else. I know you can do it!"

[O] "GRILLB" - "............. fine."

[X] "TEMMIE" - "woAhz! WoAHZ! u an tem has same names!! but wait tem already pick dis name? ;w; sowee!"

[O] "TEMMIY" - "YaYAYayAYAYA!!! pwoblem solv!"

[O] "QC" or "QT" - "Hahaha! Welcome to the crew then, Hun."

[O] "BRATTY" - "Like! OHMYGOD! That's my name, creep!"

[O] "CATTY" - "Like! OHMYGOD! Bratty! Bratty! That's like, MY NAME!"

[O] "GASTER" or "GEETER" - "............ YEAH, SURE WHY NOT."

[O] "SEMI" - "HMM?! EH?! WHO'S THERE?! WHO'S INTERRUPTING MY NAP?!"

[O] "GERSON" or "GERSY" - "I highly doubt that dorky name is yer' actual name, whipper snapper. But SURE, why not? WAH HA HA!"

[O] "RIVER" or "RIVERP" - "Tra la la. Maybe that is really your name. Maybe it isn't. It doesn't matter anyway."

[X] "MK" or "GONER" - (Crashes the game)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

OTHER NAME EASTER EGGS

[X] "TOBY" - "Bark Bark!"

[O] "KRIS" - "Very interesting..."

[O] "SUZY" or "SUSIE" - "Get your own name DUMBASS!" (Instead of a "Proceed" button to confirm your name, the Proceed Button is replaced with "Ignore.'

[O] "NOEL" or "NOELLE" - "Uhm... I can't stop you, b-but, please don't???"

[O] "BIRDLY" or "BERDLY" - Hmm! It's probably the smartest choice for your name! It's not as smart as ME, though!"

[X] "RUDY" - "And risk you ruining my reputation as mayor?! Nope. Beat it."

[X] "DESS" - "I see you found the cool name. Sorry, kid. Already picked this name."

[X] "CAROL" - "......... no."

[O] "CLOVER" - "I don't see why not pard'ner!"

[X] "CEROBA" or "ROBA" - "Absolutely not."

[X] "AXIS" - "ERROR. NAME UNUSABLE. LOSER."

[X] "NORTHS" or "STARLO" - "Sorry partner, but this name ain't big enough for the two of us!"

[X] "CHUJIN" - "This is Chujin... Piss off. This is my name."

[X] "MARTLE" or "MARTLT" - "Hahaha! I'm flattered, but no, this is my name."

[X] "KANAKO" - "(They refuse to let you pick this name.)"

[X] "MO" - "Laaame! I didn't die fer' you to steal my name, kid."

[X] "DALV" - "This name carries too much grief. Sorry..."

[X] "PANGIR" or "PGIRL" - (In Comic Sans) "uh, yeah no. pick another one, bucko."

[X] "HOOLYA" - "You're an idiot if you think you can just steal my name. Beat it."

[X] "MONO" - "(I don't care who you are, Noir what you say. This name is reserved for a real hero.)"

[O] "CHLOE" - "This name feels so familiar. You are filled with the power of... giraffes?"

[O] "LILY" or "VIOLET" - "Don't worry. No Mushrooms or Hot topics to be seen down here... right?"

[O] "ROYELL" - "The name of royalty! You are filled with the power of... MK and Ronalds???"

[O] "JEFFRY" - "Have no fear, for I am a professional lawyer!"

[O] "SUSHI" - "No."

[O] "PORK" or "PROCTR" - "The EVILEST NAME!"

[X] "ARCHIE" - "(Fun fact! Raccoons are our founding fathers! Unless you are a raccoon, you won't be getting this name.)

[O] "PETER", "CHMUET", and "MOON" - "(You must be a wonderful person if you pick this name! We hope you succeed in whatever you are doing now.)"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

MISC NAMES.

[O] "ICEE" or "MERG" - "(WARNING! This name will activate NIGHTMARE MODE! One hit, and it's back to start for you. Resetting will deactivate this mode. Proceed anyway?)"

[O] "SHAYY" - "Nice try, hot shot. There is a ban on Punch cards down here."

(NAMES ARE STILL A WORK IN PROGRESS AND MORE WILL PROBABLY BE ADDED IN THE FUTURE)

~ProctorDorkchop

[who-can-touch-my-boob]

Appreciation post!!!

To my lovely followers and most of all mutuals, thank you for not unfollowing me. My blog is a very unhinged mess, with one hyperfixation after another.

You are patient, supporting, amazing and most of all…insane. Yeah, you heard me. Fucking insane, BUT I SAY THAT WITH LOVE.

Because what sane person follows me, sees my posts, HELL! Even reblogs??? I’m a menace, I’m on the border of crazy—yet, I’m also strong and sexy, I’m free. And the best part is? No one can stop me. (Yeah it’s that TikTok sound a few years back).

I’m gonna be a little sappy, because 2023/2024 is the first time I’ve really interacted with others on here. Usually I never got personal, shared anything about myself. I just stayed very anonymous and on the sidelines. I’ve been on tumblr for over a decade, but this time when I did my comeback I started to open more up.

Thank fucking god I did because I’ve gotten to know so many awesome people from all over the world. People who shared my interests and who’s talented creators both in art, writing and other.

So to my followers, mutuals and those who don’t follow me but still interact with my posts:

I wish you all a Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, a happy 2025, a happy life and most of all that you reach whatever goals you have in life, whether those are big or small.

And most importantly, remember that you’re fucking sexy and gorgeous. Idc what anyone says, you’re a fucking majestic, beautiful and awesome. Now don’t let anyone rain on your parade, if they do then flip them off and fart in their faces!

Much love from me, your one and only who-can-touch-my-boob aka. Frida the menace.

This is aimed for the mutuals who I’ve interacted most with here and who’s allowed to touch my boobs.

@ponderingmoonlight @lost-resonance @theshinazugawaslut @celestie0 @gojosatorubrainrot @peachdues @andysdrafts @lmskitty

Gods if I forgot someone now I’ll feel so bad