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keepingitformyself · 20 hours ago
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there’s been no way for me to say (that i felt a certain way)
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Synopsis: natasha romanoff has loved you for ages and she could never seem to get it right.
pairings: natasha romanoff x reader
genre: college AU, fluff and angst.
warnings: angst?
please do not repost my work anywhere for any reason at all. if you do see this happen to any of my stories, please let me know. thank you x.
natasha met you in a very peculiar way.
it started at a friends of a friends party, in some internet starlet’s brooklyn loft.
drinks were going around, the music was loud, the smell of marijuana was very strong. she doesn’t quite remember it— after having been to a bunch of parties they all seem to blur into one— but she knows it was enough to leave a lasting impression on her.
she’d heard your piercing laugh from across the room. you, in a tight tank top and some black slacks. she could see the shine of sweat against your skin, the colorful lighting of the room making you seem so beautifully human.
everything sort of froze in the coming moments. she watched as you took your top off without a second thought. you were about to shotgun a beer and you stood tall as you did it atop the kitchen island. you didn’t need the attention, nor did you want it, but you had it.
it was a simple behavior. but it stayed with natasha long after you had crushed the beer can and tossed it on the floor somewhere.
natasha thinks you never notice her staring for the rest of the night but you do.
weeks later she sees you again at another party.
clint, wanda, tony and everyone else joins her this time. she isn’t surprised when she sees you. it was the same crowd, similar friend groups. but this time you made it easy for her to approach you.
somehow you end standing next to eachother near where all the drinks had been laid out.
"hey," you said, voice casual but warm. "didn’t expect to see you here again."
natasha smiled, though she hadn’t expected to talk to you at all. nor did she think you noticed her. "i guess we have similar taste in parties."
you laughed lightly. “guess so."
there was a beat of silence before you added, “you know, you were kinda staring at me last time.”
natasha froze for a second, unsure how to respond. she hadn’t thought you’d noticed. but before she could stammer out an excuse, you were already grinning.
“i’m just messing with you. it was funny. i didn’t think anyone would care enough to notice me.”
natasha was relieved, yet still unsure if you were actually joking. either way she felt this was going better than she planned.
the night wore on and you guys carried easy conversation. natasha was still unsure how to even approach talking to you. she felt kind of shy. so she improvised by making references to things she didn’t think you’d get, but you almost always did.
you dropped a reference to something obscure, a movie natasha had once obsessed over, and natasha stared at you for a moment longer than was socially acceptable. she couldn’t stop herself.
“you’re really into that, huh?” she said, and just like that, the bond started to form. it wasn’t immediate or instant, not the kind of connection that screams “best friends forever.” no, it was something stranger, something subtler, like two different puzzle pieces that had almost fit, only to get pushed back together by sheer happenstance.
“your references are spot on.” you laughed. natasha smiled at how easy you made it for her to be around you.
you and natasha started seeing each other more, slowly building this weird, unspoken routine. she’d text you at random, making some kind of sarcastic comment or joke only you would get, and you’d shoot back a meme that only someone with your specific sense of humor would understand. over time, you both ended up in the same circles, passing each other in the hallways of the university, at class, at parties—always just a little bit more than acquaintances, but never quite crossing into the territory of “best friends.”
there was something comfortable about it. easy, even. but for natasha, it was also strange. the more she saw you, the more she felt like there was something else there, something neither of you wanted to acknowledge. maybe it was a crush. maybe it was more than that.
it wasn’t as though either of you had been completely oblivious to the passing of time, to the fact that you were both growing older, moving through college with the same bittersweetness that everyone else felt. and yet, there was still this distance between you, an unspoken barrier that neither of you had broken down.
natasha thought about you a lot more than she’d like to admit. how she so badly wanted to cross the line between friendship and something more.
by senior year, natasha couldn’t ignore it anymore. her feelings for you weren’t just fleeting glances or passing thoughts. they were there, constant, sitting beneath her skin, running through her mind like a song she couldn’t shake. but it wasn’t just a crush. it was more. she could feel it. she knew it.
the desperation kept getting worse.
it was a slow burn.
you were months set from graduating, natasha felt it was time she’d try to test her luck.
it was late into the evening at yet another party—music blaring, laughter echoing through the crowded living room, and cups of cheap beer littering the tables. one last semester before graduation, before the "real world" set in. natasha was sitting on the couch, leaning against the back with her legs stretched out in front of her. her eyes roamed the room, scanning for someone to talk to. and then she saw you.
you were in the middle of a conversation with clint and wanda, your hands animatedly gesturing as you told some wild story about a disastrous trip to the beach, the kind of tale that had everyone in stitches. natasha couldn’t help but smile from across the room. there was something magnetic about you—how you lived so fully, how you pulled everyone into your orbit without even trying. natasha had been watching you for months now, always on the edge of your space, always wishing she could be more than just a silent observer.
she didn’t know when it started—when the simple admiration had turned into something else. but now, as she watched you laugh with your friends, something in her chest tightened. this wasn’t a crush she could just ignore.
it wasn’t the first time natasha had thought about asking you out. but tonight felt different. maybe it was the proximity of graduation, the sudden realization that this was it—that you both were on the brink of leaving behind this chaotic, unmoored time in your lives. she could either stay on the sidelines or take the chance.
she stood up, smoothing out her jacket and walking across the room. her friends—clint, wanda, and sam—noticed her approaching and exchanged knowing glances, all but daring her to make a move. natasha could feel the weight of their stares, but she ignored them. she focused only on you.
"hey," she said, stepping into the conversation, a little breathless from the nerves she’d kept hidden.
you turned, giving her that warm smile you always did. "hey, nat! what’s up?"
"not much, just wanted to, uh, ask you something," natasha began, her usual confidence faltering just a little.
“i was thinking about heading to this bar later, just to get away from all… this,” she gestured vaguely to the party around them, “and i was wondering if you wanted to join me? for drinks. just us. you know, before we all get caught up in the whole graduation mess.”
it was casual, maybe too casual. but natasha didn’t want to make it seem like a big deal. not with everyone watching.
there was a pause, just a beat too long, before you looked at her, a faint frown pulling at your brow. you were processing. “uh,” you hesitated, glancing at your friends.
clint, wanda, and sam all turned their heads at the same time, giving you the slightest raise of their brows. you bit your lip, clearly unsure, and natasha’s heart sank a little at the hesitation.
"i mean," you said slowly, looking back at natasha. "we’re friends, nat. i just… i’m not sure."
it was a gentle rejection, but it stung all the same. natasha swallowed, masking her disappointment with a shrug. "no, yeah, of course. no pressure." she let out a quiet laugh, her hand rubbing the back of her neck, trying to laugh it off. "i was just messing with you. don't worry about it."
you nodded, a small, apologetic smile on your lips. "i mean, i’d love to hang out more, just—"
"totally fine," natasha interrupted, her voice light but edged with something that made her own heart ache. she smiled, keeping it neutral. "maybe some other time."
she turned away quickly, but she felt your eyes on her as she walked back to the couch, her friends watching the entire scene unfold. clint raised his brows, and natasha just shook her head, not wanting to give them the satisfaction of knowing how deeply that small exchange had affected her.
but inside, it stung. it stung more than she cared to admit. it wasn’t just a small rejection. it was the fear that maybe you had noticed her feelings all along and were just too scared to say anything about it.
that night, natasha tried to sleep, but her thoughts wouldn’t stop racing. you were everything she had wanted, but in this strange, liminal space, neither of you had been brave enough to admit it.
weeks passed, the semester came to an end, and graduation day loomed on the horizon. natasha and you both moved on in your own ways, starting to make plans for life after college. but something lingered. something unsaid. life became a little more faster, and faces got a little older.
you reached out to her a few times. it was never the same as before. it was different now, with this strange tension lingering between you both. but you kept in touch, as if you both were afraid of letting go of something that might have been, something that might have still been.
and maybe it was ridiculous, natasha thought, but she was okay with it. she had loved you for years, and maybe that was the most honest thing she could admit to herself.
because even if you two had never been the closest of people, you’d always been there. always in the background, always in between. and somehow, that was enough for natasha. enough for her to hold on to the hope that maybe, one day, you’d both be able to finally figure it out.
it had been two years since you both left the university. two years where natasha had started a career in marketing, constantly moving up, climbing the corporate ladder while trying (and failing) to suppress the things she didn’t want to feel about you. she had dated, of course. a couple of short-term relationships, nothing serious. but nothing had ever lasted, and she had never quite understood why until now. the answer had always been there, hovering just out of reach, in the form of a text, a call, a passing thought about you.
as for you, you’d moved across the country for a job in graphic design. you didn’t think much about natasha at first. life had been busy—new city, new friends, new routine—but every now and then, you'd wonder if she'd thought of you. if she remembered how everything had felt when you were both on the brink of something, but never quite dared to cross the line.
and then it happened.
it wasn’t planned. it wasn’t expected. but one saturday evening, natasha found herself sitting at a bar in brooklyn after a long week at work. she’d had a rough day. one of those days where everything felt like too much. and then, as she nursed her gin and tonic, she heard someone call her name.
it was a voice she hadn’t heard in what felt like forever.
“natasha?”
she turned, already recognizing the voice before she even saw your face. and there you were, standing in the doorway of the bar like a memory coming to life. your hair had grown a little longer, and you looked different, older in a way that made Natasha’s heart skip a beat. but you were still you—the same you who had been in those parties, those late-night study sessions, the one who had always made her laugh with a look or a passing reference.
for a moment, neither of you said anything. just stood there, eyes locking, as if trying to figure out whether this was real.
“i didn’t know you were in new york,” natasha said, her voice betraying the sudden weight in her chest. she couldn’t keep the smile from forming, even though she tried.
“i wasn’t planning on being,” you said, grinning. “work sent me here for a few weeks. i was meeting some friends, but it’s been a while, so i thought i’d just see if you were around.”
it wasn’t exactly casual. but you both knew it wasn’t entirely random, either. it felt like fate had decided that you two were finally going to do this.
you sat down, and the conversation flowed as naturally as it always had. the awkwardness of the past melted away. you didn’t need to pretend anymore. there were no more games, no more hesitations.
just you and natasha, picking up where you left off, though this time, the space between you felt a little different. there was an understanding now, a quiet knowing in the way you both spoke, a recognition that time had done its job.
“so…how’s life?” natasha asked, pushing her drink aside and leaning in a little closer.
you shrugged, but there was something different about you too, something less guarded. “it’s been alright. busy. but you know how that goes. i’ve been thinking about home, though. about—” you paused, then looked directly at natasha. “about people i should have kept in touch with.”
natasha’s heart was thudding in her chest, but she kept it together. she was a master of hiding emotions, after all. “yeah?” she asked, her voice softer now.
“yeah,” you said, with a smile that made natasha’s stomach flutter. “it’s funny how things work out. you don’t realize what you miss until you’re standing in front of it again.”
time had always been a strange thing between natasha and you—something both distant and close at the same time, like a thread that wound its way through your lives, never quite snapping, always lingering. you’d known each other for years, seen each other at parties, shared quiet moments, and laughed at the same jokes. but all that time, there had always been a hesitation. a space between the two of you, filled with something—something both of you had been aware of but had never dared to name.
it was the kind of thing that was easier to ignore in college, easier to pretend it wasn’t there while you were both busy with classes, with your lives, with the thrill of being young and not yet knowing what you wanted out of the world.
but that something between you had always been there, pulling at both of you, quiet but undeniable. the way you caught each other’s eyes a little too long. the way your conversations turned into something more meaningful without either of you intending it. the way natasha would see you at parties and catch her breath for just a moment. the way you’d smile, as if you both knew, but neither of you was brave enough to act on it.
you’d both dated people. tried relationships. but it had never lasted, had it? there was always that nagging feeling in the back of your mind—something missing, something not quite right. as if your lives couldn’t fit together because they weren’t ready to yet. you didn’t have the words for it, and neither did natasha. but you both knew. you always knew.
the things that had once seemed complicated—life, timing, fear—suddenly didn’t feel as big as they once had. there was a quiet honesty between you now, as if you both had grown enough to stop pretending you didn’t feel it. the awkwardness, the hesitation, the “maybe” that had been there before was gone.
it was you. it had always been you. and you knew it too.
“so,” natasha said after a beat, her voice softer now, quieter than before. “what are we doing here, really? we’re not strangers. we’ve known each other for, what, almost four years now?”
you looked at her, your lips curling into a smile that didn’t hide the tension in your gaze. “we’ve known each other longer than that,” you said. “we’ve always known.”
“i think i’ve always been afraid of this,” natasha admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. “afraid that i’d say the wrong thing, or that it would mess things up between us. that maybe the timing was never going to be right.”
you nodded slowly. “i’ve been afraid of that too.” you paused, then added with a wry smile, “i was never good with timing.”
“maybe we don’t need perfect timing,” natasha said softly, her gaze meeting yours with something she hadn’t let herself feel before—a quiet certainty. “maybe it’s just the right time now. after all this time.”
you didn’t answer right away. you didn’t have to. instead, you reached across the bar, your hand brushing gently against hers, and just like that, it all clicked. there was no more hesitation. no more waiting. you both knew what this was, what it always had been.
“yeah,” you said, your voice low and certain. “i think you’re right.”
and that was it.
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hoshinasblade · 3 days ago
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you are so close to gaslighting yourself into thinking that maybe, just maybe you have already told hoshina's mom in the past what your favorite tea is.
the problem with that thought is today was the first time you met the mother of your boyfriend.
you denied it in your head - for all you know, perhaps mrs. hoshina is just really a good at guessing. that, or you are going batshit crazy.
because at that very day, people you have met for the first time - people who may be friends with hoshina soshiro but are practically strangers to you - seem to be aware of small details about you.
captain ashiro complimented you on your blue dress after shaking your hands, saying it's obvious why it is your favorite color, emphasizing how it brings out the intensity of your eyes. even okonogi, who you know works directly with the third division's vice-captain, had a specific joyful aura on her friendly face as she offered to hang out with you in the future, mentioning how she is a fan of true crime documentaries too and suggesting in the same breath that you should try the pudding sold in the headquarter's cafeteria.
you could have let all of that go if only you did not blush like a teenager after hoshina's own older brother called you by your childhood nickname during family dinner.
"i'm sorry." hoshina's hand found yours, his thumb drawing patterns on your wrist. he knows you'd been on edge since morning, and although this is entirely your idea - meeting his friends and his family in one day - he wouldn't blame you if you're overwhelmed.
"they did their research on me or something," you tried to laugh the nerves away. it didn't work.
"ah." hoshina suddenly looked guity. " that. well -" he stopped for a moment, gathering his wits, choosing the right words to say. "i mean, it makes sense that everyone who actually knows me would know about you, really."
you wanted to joke as a response; you wanted to say that he's talkative and tends to yap for hours about stuff he loves so yes, people around him would naturally know things about you. but then you caught yourself because this is yet another confirmation of what hoshina soshiro had been telling you for months now - that you are someone he loves.
you did not know being known could feel this sweet.
"huh. do you reckon i can extort them for information about you next time?" this time it was your turn to grab hoshina's hand, and with your forefinger, you traced three little words on the warm skin of his palm.
[author's note: hello guys, i know i haven't been posting a lot anymore, but i am thankful to everyone who still remembers this blog - yes i can read your asks, yes i see that you've tagged me in a fic, yes i checked my notifications in this blog every now and then. it might take me long to respond most of the time so apologies in advance but please know that i appreciate all interactions from everyone.
also i dont need to remind you but i don't tolerate copy-pasting or reposting any of my works anywhere. i read a lot from here too, and other writers can attest to this as well - we know if a line or a paragraph from any of our works is copied and/or reworded. ]
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honorhearted · 2 days ago
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“S-seriously?”
"Okay, but did you have to say it like that?" Ben asked, ducking his face back into his hands. "As hard as we try to deny it, men really are no different from cavemen. We see or hear something the slightest bit titillating, and then we cave... No pun intended." Here, he lifted his head again, hiding all but his eyes behind his hands. "Could you maybe stop sneering at me?"
Rebekah sighed -- was she annoyed? Perplexed? -- before she clumsily offered, “Um… Your work on my inner thigh was kind of nice. But really, just about anywhere works.” 
Lowering his hands, Ben found that he wished to tease her, but the damnable heat in his lap didn't dissipate, and only seemed to worsen, so instead, all he offered her was a low whoosh of air.
Smooth. Spectacular. Eloquent beyond compare.
“Okay, you know what?” Rebekah capped her pen and rose from her stool. “Nix the planning. Maybe spontaneity is a better idea. How about, when we’re with each other, you have my full permission to initiate sex whenever, wherever, and we can go from there? I think as long as we keep communicating, it could work.” 
Ben's mouth dropped, but he was quick to close it. "Uhh...need I remind you about the caveman analogy? I don't think you realize how often that could be."
Rebekah was immovable. “Like I said before, you’re my friend and I trust you completely– so much so that I asked you to do this. That means I also trust you with my body. No more addressing the elephant in the room. We’ll treat these weekends like they are: two friends with unconventional benefits.”   
Whether or not it was her intention, Ben was oddly touched by her declaration. Despite the occasional ache of yearning pulsing throughout his lap, the stirring of affection overpowered his urges and he touched her hand on the counter, lightly squeezing. "Me, too," he assured her. "As crazy as it sounds, I...don't think I could've done this with anyone else."
Rebekah was distant enough that things weren't terribly strange or uncomfortable when they were apart, and they were also close enough that there wasn't much discomfort with the actual intimacy. That made it a win-win, as far as he was concerned.
Something in Rebekah's face shifted -- she seemed bolder, coy -- and he sucked a breath once she pushed her hips into his thigh, arching until all he had to do was grind down, should he wish for a semblance of relief. Her innocent little, “Okay?” had him nodding fitfully, unable to tear his eyes from her suggestive positioning.
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But before he could speak, think, or touch her back, the damnable doorbell rang, and Ben sprang upward, accidentally knocking both their foreheads together. "Ow! Jesus," he swore, both embarrassment and arousal flooding through him in tumultuous waves.
Clutching at his forehead, he kept cursing while he made a path for the door. Once he opened it, he was unsurprised, but rather annoyed to find a bemused teen on the other side holding a box of pizza.
"Um...hi?" The boy sounded confused, his eyes darting in between Ben's face and the ground since he was still gripping his forehead and muttering indistinctly.
"Sorry, sorry... Hang on." Despite the tip already having been included in the online payment, Ben felt compelled to give him yet another one just for any potential awkwardness. After passing the teen a twenty, he took the pizza, closed the door behind him, and all but sagged against it as he held up the box in half-hearted victory. "To the winner go all the spoils, eh?"
In this case, everything seemed spoiled, and pink-cheeked, he returned to Rebekah before dropping the box onto the island. "Are you okay?"
While some women might think that Ben’s attention to safety detail was a turn-off, Rebekah found the quirk rather endearing, and funny in an adorable way. Of course, she might still fall under the biased category. Were it any other man, would she still have that stance? 
“We could spin you in bubble wrap beforehand, if it’ll make you feel better,” she quipped with a grin, “Or you could wear a helmet and some knee and elbow pads.” 
Fortunately, the counter idea seemed to appeal to Ben. Suddenly she was glad that she’d added the suggestion at the last minute. Bekah considered making a lube jest pertaining to the butter, but ultimately decided against it. No need to risk making things awkward again because a joke didn’t land right. Better to quit while she was ahead. 
That mattered little, because the reminder of how many times they had left to ‘do the deed’ over the weekend came next, the air suddenly became uncomfortable, but she couldn’t determine if it was because Ben was embarrassed to talk about it, or if it was just because it concerned her – and she hadn’t even mentioned the round they’d need to do Sunday morning before her drive home. 
At the very least, he agreed that they should talk about where they liked to be touched – however cumbersome it seemed. 
"What you did earlier was really nice, too...when you were kissing along my...ah..." Ben gestured to his midriff, prompting Bekah’s cheeks to heat up quicker than the sun’s surface. "The whole touching everywhere but there angle is always a little maddening."
“Right. Okay. Good.”
Those three words were all she could manage as she stared down at the flimsy list and tried not to think about the feel of his skin against her lips, the alluring dip where his hip and groin were joined, and the way his abdomen tightened and his chest rose and fell when she’d gone lower. 
Heat pooled in her lower half and she shifted on her stool, underlining their names just to give herself something else to focus on. His self-conscious laugh caught her attention and she was surprised to find him leaning closer. 
"Is it bad that this is kind of turning me on?" 
Had she forgotten how to breathe for a hot second?
C’mon, Bekah. In, then out. Wait. Bad wording choice…
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“S-seriously?” she asked, managing a lopsided smile of disbelief. 
"God, I don't know if I can take much more of this, Beks...our list is like a submission to Penthouse." He flung up a hand faster than she could respond. "Er...not that I've ever read that, of course, but...there's only so much a guy can listen to before he starts getting unraveled. Alas, it would seem all men truly are the same."
With a sigh, Bekah set the pen down and placed her hands on the counter, consigning to abandon the list, at least for the time being. It was too hard to concentrate when Ben was so close, especially when all she wanted to do was hold him in her arms again.
God, she was pathetic, wasn’t she? 
"What about you?" he asked, "Where do you want to be touched?"
“Um…” 
Speak, you fool! Enough with the ridiculously long pauses! 
“Your work on my inner thigh was kind of nice,” she admitted, hopelessly pink cheeked, “But really, just about anywhere works.” 
It was the truth. It didn’t matter at all where he touched her because every bit of contact from him was wanted. 
“Okay, you know what?” she sighed again, rising from the stool and mustering up a bit of confidence, “Nix the planning. Maybe spontaneity is a better idea. How about, when we’re with each other, you have my full permission to initiate sex whenever, wherever, and we can go from there? I think as long as we keep communicating, it could work.” 
It would be sort of like they were together, but with the sole purpose of having a child rather than a normal functioning relationship. That would be simple enough, right? Regardless, she was going to keep telling herself that. 
“Like I said before, you’re my friend and I trust you completely– so much so that I asked you to do this. That means I also trust you with my body. No more addressing the elephant in the room. We’ll treat these weekends like they are: two friends with unconventional benefits.”   
Did that sound weird? Was she making this worse? 
Recalling that he’d said he was mildly turned on by their conversation, Bekah made the bold choice of edging closer to him, placing her hands on his arms and pressing her lower half against his thigh, her eyes wide and flickering with a look of coquettish intentions. 
“Okay?”
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fxckn-sxck-fr · 2 days ago
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omg hi if ur inbox is open can u give us a short blurb/your thoughts on or some kind of headcanon list for yan tim drake (romantic) bc ur interpretation of him is so yum🤤 i like how you rlly focus on more darker aspects of his character which i dont see a lot of ppl doing unfortunately bc the way he’s a complete FREAK LMFAO🫣🫣
𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐄 𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐓𝐈𝐌 𝐃𝐑𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐆𝐇𝐓𝐒…
!!! GN reader, mentally ill Tim, psychotic Tim, just Tim, he’s a problem, manic/depressive episodes, violent tendencies, suicidal tendencies, stalking, kidnapping, obsessive behaviors, gross ways to show affection, slight insinuation of pervy Tim, blood, mutilation, harm to reader mentioned, self-harm, severed body parts, drugging, gaslighting.
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YAAAAYYYYYYYYY, TIM DRAKE TIME!!!! This is so long overdue. I’ve been meaning to write for him, but… it just hasn’t happened yet. I hope the ideas will start flowing after I get some of this off my chest. I’ve been harboring so many miscellaneous Tim thoughts for a while.
(Y’all. The CW on this just kept getting longer and longer. My bad.)
First thing’s first, Tim is a fucking mess. There’s no way to know for sure which version of him you’re gonna get each day. Maybe he’s going through a manic episode, coming up with batshit crazy schemes and going on about things that don’t make sense. Maybe he’ll then swing into a depressive fit, where he can’t even bring himself to get up from the floor. Maybe he wakes up completely fine after an hour long nap, regretting whatever initial brash decisions he made. Maybe he quickly turns violent at the sound of knocking at his door. Maybe he wants to claw his own arteries out after trying to maintain a normal social interaction.
The possibilities are endless! Which makes him extremely dangerous.
If you’ve caught the eye of Tim Drake… yikes. Good luck. There’s a chance you don’t even know who he is before he inevitably kidnaps you (completely on a whim, no less). Maybe you’re a total stranger he saw on the street once, captivating him and causing him to spiral into a twisted obsession. While I’ll defend Tim against the fandom allegations until my lungs give out, I’ll admit: they’re on to something when it comes to stalker Tim. Bro definitely has pictures of you covering every square inch of his walls. And, yes, it’s to the point where they overlap each other.
Kidnapping can take anywhere between 3 days and 3 years. During that time, he may try to weasel his way into your life in an attempt to win you over... though we all know how well that would go. As I’ve mentioned before, he may be attractive, but he’s such an off-putting person. Just being around him is enough to give you the creeps. And it doesn’t help he’s completely unaware of how weird some behaviors are. Tim... honey… you can’t shamelessly stare at people with a startling grin like that. I know you’re thinking about how much you want to lick your darling-to-be’s neck, but it’s weird.
Whether he attempts to interact with you or not, one thing’s for sure: he’s stealing your shit. Clothes, toothbrushes, half-eaten food, straws, whatever he can get his hands on. Don’t ask what he does with it. You don’t wanna know. Tim is a neeeaaaasty freak, to the point where even he thinks to himself, “what the fuck is wrong with me” after he calms down from a fit.
Oh, speaking of guilt, Tim is filled with that shit. He may swing from various stages of instability, but there are moments where he’s perfectly fine. And those are the moments where he has to grapple with the consequences of his own actions. Those can range from slightly scaring someone to causing irreversible damage. There have been many times where he snapped out of some episode with blood dribbling down hands and chunks of skin under his fingernails. Who did he hurt? Could be someone else, could be himself, could be you. Who knows!!
Let’s actually get into his suicidal tendencies a bit. His arms and legs are covered in scratches and cuts. Now, this could be explained by his vigilante life, but it gets harder to justify when you get to the bite marks at angles that only make sense if they were self-inflicted. Oh, and also the carvings of your name. He does that a lot. It’s like you’re with him everywhere he goes!! And kind of on the same note, he wants you to have him with you as well!! This could come in the form of strips of skin, vials of blood, toes, an eye, an ear, a spleen… just whatever he’s willing to cut off or out of himself in the moment.
His suicidal tendencies are also connected to those moments of guilt I mentioned before. After calming down and realizing what he’s done, he may harm himself as some sort of penance; especially if he’s done something to you. Depending on how far he spirals from his guilt, he may actually enact “an eye for an eye” (perhaps in the most literal sense) to help make up for what he’s done. Who knows, maybe he’ll replace missing pieces of you with his own. Will it work? No idea. Maybe a skin graph or two, but let’s hope you don’t have to find things out in the more extreme cases.
I think it’s important to keep in mind that Tim Drake is just generally fucked-up. “Normal” Tim doesn’t mean “completely well-adjusted” Tim, it just means he’s not acting on some manic or brash decision. Normal Tim would be fine with chaining or drugging you if he’s justified it to himself. As long as he’s not causing active physical harm to you, he probably won’t see anything wrong with whatever he’s doing in the long run. It’s for your own good, okay? Don’t worry, he’s gone through the possibilities and failsafes. Nothing bad will happen to you!
Unfortunately, manic Tim does not go through the possibilities and failsafes. Well, he kind of does, but the logic is far from realistic and runs in total circles. Whereas drugging you has a rational (fucked up, but still rational) reason behind it — to keep you immobile — filling your ear canal with cement takes some mental gymnastics. Manic Tim doesn’t want you to listen to anyone else. Solution? You can’t hear through concrete, right? At that point, you’re at the mercy of his mood swing RNG. Let’s hope he calms down enough to take a step back and really think about this. Hmm… filling someone’s ears with cement… probably not healthy. Wow. Silly Tim! He let himself get carried away, didn’t he? Whoops! There are more logical ways to keep you from listening to anyone else.
That’s where manipulation comes in. I mean, come on. Y’all know who his mentor is, right? Stable Tim is wicked good at manipulation. Huh? He’s acting weird? Well, he didn’t want to say anything, but he was actually thinking the same thing about you. Yeah, you’ve been kind of off lately… is there something wrong? You sure? You know he’s there for you, right? Okay, just making sure. A gaslighting king when he’s in the right headspace for it. Too bad his psychotic aura gives him away; he’d probably be really good at keeping up appearances if he just got medicated or something.
So… yeah. Just some Tim thoughts. What a charmer, amiright? I don’t think this one’s salvageable. No amount of therapy could ever fix whatever Tim’s got going on. Just throw the whole damn guy away. Start over. Your only hope of escaping him is the chance of someone on the outside realizing what’s up. Here’s to hoping Tim gets institutionalized before he does something really bad!!
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ribbonsncherries · 3 days ago
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I have a request if you are interested? :)
A teen!dad jess. He has a best friend from New York (she can have a name or it can be Y/N, you can choose) (they are endgame, jess never had feelings for Rory but she has feelings for Jess, it won't go anywhere) Jess and his best friend have a kid, they co-parent (whether they are dating already or in the future is up to you) Jess gets sent to Stars Hallow, she ends up moving to stars Hallow to, to be close to Jess and so their kid can be with him too (she is emancipated, plus Jess knows she's coming because they keep in contact) if anyone reading this would like to turn this into an actual story, I'm totally down for reading it :) if you choose this request, I look forward to reading it. Thank you!!
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ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི₊ ⊹𝓗𝓮𝓵𝓵𝓸 𝓢𝓽𝓪𝓻𝓼 𝓗𝓸𝓵𝓵𝓸𝔀!˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥
A/N: Of course! I’ve had the biggest crush on Jess since I was little. He really opened my eyes to bad boys lol. But this is my first story request, so I was super excited I literally made a whole timeline of what happened which would've taken way too much time to publish so I hope you enjoy this mini one shot! 
Summary: Jess Mariano became a teen dad at 16 and a year later is now struggling to find a place in Stars Hollow to keep his son and girlfriend safe and close. Eventually, the Gilmores come to the rescue! 
Warnings: Nothing but fluff :)
Divider credits:
@anitalenia @cafekitsune
GIF Credits:
@luke-danes
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REBLOGS AND LIKES ARE ALWAYS APPRECIATED!
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It started as a game. Just a stupid game of 7 minutes in heaven at a house party. It turned into a friends-with-benefits deal cause Y/N and Jess were too stupidly shy to express their feelings yet the sex was enough for both of them. They were dumb hormonal teenagers. But when Y/N needed to go to the bathroom more, her craving for lemonade increased, and her period was late. The two faint lines appeared boldly. When she told Jess his heart sank. They both didn’t know how to feel, but when talk of abortion came for the both of them from a flyer they didn’t have the heart to do it. So they chose to have the baby even though both were scared shitless. When Y/N’s parents found out it was even worse, they told her they would not take over anything. Everything was up to Y/N and Jess, They would not keep or take care of the baby unless she went to school or got a job. Jess’ mother however was displeased. She was a bit afraid her son would follow the path his father did, to abandon Y/N and start something new with another woman and never hear from him again. But as Jess began working more and more to help financially his mother’s worries lessened, Y/N however continued her studies at home getting money from Jess every day to prepare for the arrival of their baby. So when their baby boy Liam finally came after 9 months it was like hot potato. Liam was passed back and forth between the both of them, although both Jess and Y/N liked each other it was hard to see each other so often from work and school. But after a year Jess was shipped off to Stars Hollow, Connecticut to be with his uncle because of his lack of effort in school. So Y/N and Jess decided it would be best for the both of them to make this work and go together. But there were some problems with Luke.
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“No,” Luke said as he began making coffee. Jess had his arms in the air and shrugged with a scoff. “Luke, it’s my girlfriend and my kid. I can’t be away from my kid.” Luke looked him up and down “You shouldn’t have been doing that tango kid, 'cause I'm not having a puking and crying kid in my already cramped-up apartment. Jess, I'm sorry but we don’t have space and even if we did your school is one of the priorities along with taking care of both of them.” Lorelai came into the diner like always and sat in the barstool. “Hey! Mr Lukey Danes, Coffee for your very special and loyal customer pretty please with a little cherry on top,” she said snapping her fingers in a joking manner. “Lorelai not now.” Luke scoffed. “What’s going on? What's with the attitude between you men? Did he steal your super secret Krabby patty formula or something?” she asked. Jess rolled his eyes as he went upstairs. Luke grabbed a mug and poured coffee in it “Jess wants to bring his girlfriend and kid to Stars Hollow. But we can’t.” he said simply. Lorelai’s smile faded, “He has a kid..” she asked softly. “Yeah, with some girl named Y/N. She graduated early to take care of their kid and Jess wants both her and his son here but I told him there's no space and I can’t help cause of the diner and-”
“I’ll bring her in.” 
Luke looked at Lorelai. Her face wasn’t her joking face or smiling banter like always. But a serious one, her look of almost desperation. Lorelai looked back on when she was pregnant with Rory. How no one helped her and Christopher not even being there. But she saw how disappointed Jess’ face was when she came in. “Lorelai I can’t ask you for that, it’s too much your house is already cramped up,” Luke said. “No, tell Jess to tell Y/N to come, and I'll take her in, besides, it’s only me and a smarty pants who's always in school,” she said seriously. “I know how she probably must feel. I’ll tell Rory and we’ll make adjustments to an old upstairs room,” she said as she got up almost excitedly. “You forgot to pay!” Luke yelled out. “You can cover the bill for me ol’ diner boy!” she yelled out. 
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Jess got the news and began helping out Rory and Lorelai with moving everything and making sure everything was perfect for when Y/N and Liam arrived. He paid for furniture and sheets while Lorelai and Rory cleaned up some of Rory’s baby furniture to give to Jess and Y/N. Although they were girly it was better than nothing after all. Then suddenly everyone in Stars Hollow now knew Jess Mariano the 17-year-old schoolboy had a son. “Thank you guys so much, for letting us stay, I’m sorry for the bother, Liam cries only when his diaper is wet I promise I’ll try to keep quiet,” Y/N said as she carried Liam into the house while Rory helped with her luggage. “I’ll clean and cook, anything you tell me I’ll do,” she said. Lorelai smiled, “Well, thanks our wallets are crying from takeout every day.” she joked “But seriously it’s fine I was in your shoes before and I understand how hard it is for you to be so young. it’s fine.” Jess came in with bags in his hands filled with baby stuff. “I was gonna surprise you but I guess not,” he said smiling. Y/N sped walked towards him and hugged him while Liam was in between the two. 
“I’m glad you're here,” he said softly in her ear. He kissed her softly and pulled away to take Liam from her arms. “Hey.’ Jess smiled at Liam. His black hair shone in the sun from the window as the baby smiled and tugged on Jess’ shirt. “Hopefully you haven't been giving your mom a hard time these past few weeks,” he said to him smiling. Liam laid his head on Jess’ chest as he sucked his pacifier while Jess’ carried him around the house while Rory and Lorelai were giving Y/N a small tour of everything in the House as well as Stars Hollow. Everyone in Stars Hollow was suddenly interested in the new mom and son in town Including Kirk who offered to babysit for the very specific price of 23.99. Although the people were strange (Kirk) and people began asking about her and Liam it was finally Jess and Y/N alone in their room with Liam right in between them. 
“I’ve missed you” he whispered to her. His fingers ran through her hair as he looked into her eyes. Y/N closed her eyes as she took in everything. “Me too, just afraid I guess. It’s much quieter than New York I'll say that.” she smiled. She looked down to see Liam softly snoring in between them. Her hands went to the soft black hair he got from Jess as she smiled.  “This wasn’t the life I expected, but I’m glad I’m down this path with you and I don’t regret it one bit…” she said softly. Y/N leaned in and kissed Jess softly and passionately. This was their fresh start in life in the small town of Stars Hollow.
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kaliforniahigh · 2 days ago
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Can you please write something about Noahs girlfriend trying the ‘dafuq’ trend that I’ve seen all over TikTok on Noah 😭 If you haven’t seen the trend you can probably check anywhere for it! xx
I went down a rabbit hole watching these videos. Couples trend are so funny when they're harmless!
You know what other trend would be funny as hell? Recording with a filter and seeing how long it takes for Noah to notice his eyes are too far apart LOL
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From time to time, Noah agreed to do a video with you. You weren't super active on social media, but sometimes you posted food-related videos. This time, you invited him to taste the Crumbl flavors of the week.
You both left the store, and Noah was holding the large pink box full of cookies in his hands, and you reached in his pocket for the key to unlock the car. You both got in and he set the box on the center console, in between you two.
"Why do we have to eat in the car?", he asked you, a bit puzzled by the idea.
"Because it's the aesthetic, Noah", you explained, grabbing your phone and setting it on the holder stuck to the dashboard.
"Eating in the car is an aesthetic now?", he mumbled to himself and you just chuckled in response.
Noah thought you were just tasting the cookies in the video, but you had something else planned. You've seen this trend going around on TikTok, where girlfriends praked their boyfriends saying "dafuq" at the end of every sentence.
You decided that it would be a fun prank to pull on him, since it was harmless and there was finally a couples trend that didn't dimish the woman.
Since you didn't use many slangs while speaking, you had a feeling he would catch on pretty soon. But it was worth a try anyways.
"Ok, I'm gonna start recording", you told him and you saw him adjusting his hair out of the corner of your eye. You hit the record button and started speaking.
"Hey everyone, so we just left the Crumbl store, and we're sitting here with a big box full of cookies for us to try, dafuq", you said the last word a little lower, so it wasn't as obvious.
Noah rubbed his hands together, actually excited to try the sweet treats.
"So I was thinking we could split them in half, dafuq", you said, while opening the box and looking over the different flavors.
"What, did you find something strange in there?", he asked you, pering into the box, and you realized he was acknowledging the "dafuq" you added. Playing it cool, you replied.
"No, everything's fine", he only nodded in response. "Do you want to try the Confetti Milshake or the Snickerdoodle first, dafuq?"
You looked at him, trying to keep your composure. He was looking at you weird now, but didn't comment on it yet.
"We can try the Snickerdoodle first", he said and you went to grab the cookie and split it in half, handing one piece to Noah. You both clicnked your cookies together in a toast before eating, and you really hoped he wouldn't say cheers, because you couldn't imagine you saying "cheers dafuq".
You both took a bite out of the cookie, feeling the sweet flavor enter your mouth.
"This one is really nice. Simple and nice flavor", he gave his review.
"It is really nice. Not to sweet either, dafuq", you said, grabbing a napkin to clean your mouth.
"Ok, what is going on?", he finally asked you, now turning his body to fully face you.
"What do you mean, dafuq?", you said, looking at the box as if trying to decide the nest flavor.
"Nope, you're dodging the question. Why are you dafuq to the end of every sentence?", he grabbed your hand and you turned your head to look at him.
You couldn't help but break into laughter. His expression was actually serious, because he was actually concerned about you.
"Why are you laughing?", he asked, with a little indigination in your voice.
"Oh, this is so funny", you grabbed your stomach and tried to take some deep breaths. "It's just a prank I've seen on TikTok", you finally explained to him.
"Oh my God", he breathed a sigh of relief. "I thought your brain was malfunctioning for a moment", he put a hand on his chest.
"I'm fine, I promise", you put a comforting hand on his arm, and after finally calming down, he said.
"Can we try the Confetti Milkshake now?"
You stopped recording and grabbed the cookie from the box, splitting it in half and giving a piece to Noah.
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johanna-swann · 1 day ago
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The annoying thing about the break up is that it would have made so much more sense if they'd had Tommy break it off because of any of the multiple things Buck says in that conversation that are kind of weird. The vibe that Buck also kind of wants to be Tommy, which isn't helped by him replacing Tommy twice over. The fact that it's been six months of Tommy apparently being open about the kind of work he had to do on himself to get to this point but Buck still hasn't really taken Tommy off the pedestal. Asking someone who probably has a house to move in to a loft. Springing a mention of a possible future marriage on him when it doesn't seem like it's come up before. The writing in this episode was so bad but they still managed to unintentionally give Tommy actual reasons to decide he was done.
I'm not sure what Buck "replacing Tommy" is referring to here, but a lot of the other stuff I agree with. Even upon first glance that break-up made so little sense to me that I immediately jumped to the conclusion that this was merely one of the "hurdles" we were promised and they'd get back together in season 8b.
It was always a possibility that Tommy wouldn't be Buck's "forever love", but the way they broke up was... strange, to say the least.
First of all the Abby thing makes zero sense. It doesn't fit with the way Abby talked about her ex. Even if she didn't want to talk to Buck about being engaged before, she would've at least mentioned to Carla that the terrible break-up she had to relive over and over again came from her fiancé, not just a boyfriend. It doesn't make sense that Tommy never mentioned her to the 118 either. She was basically his beard, right? Isn't the point of those relationships that you can pretend to be straight in front of others? And then Tommy actively hid his relationship with her instead?
This only served as a conversation starter though, it wasn't the reason they broke up. In his conversation with Josh Buck didn't feel comfortable using the l-word, but he did admit seeing and wanting a future with Tommy. Which he later also said to Tommy himself.
Then the very moment Buck said the words "move in" I immediately went "not a-fucking-gain!!" Because this rushed, overcorrecting clinging - throwing ideas of marriage and so on around without even having exchanged "I love you"s yet - is such a Buck 2.0 thing to do. He didn't even take into consideration that Tommy lives in an entire ass house. You promised us Buck would get off the Hamster wheel Tim! He has been more grounded than I've ever seen him in a relationship, but then suddenly, nope. Character growth who?
And lastly Tommy's answer. Maybe he just got cold feet, but. Why did he even give Buck a second chance in the first place when he already thought this wasn't going to go anywhere. If he thought what Buck needed were more casual queer experiences, then why did he stay with Buck for six months? And if he liked Buck enough to be afraid of getting his heart broken, wouldn't he have left that relationship earlier?
I mean. They ended up breaking things off over liking each other too much, essentially. Find the sense in that.
And maybe while Tommy was too pessimistic and scared, Buck was still viewing the relationship too much through rose-tinted glasses. But that's when you say: "Hey, we kind of want the same thing here, but I think we still have a lot to talk about and to figure out about each other. Maybe let's just date a little longer and come back to this conversation in two or three months."
(Though I think Tommy struggling and working on himself is one of the very things Buck so admires about him. It's not that Buck is (love-) blind to this information, it's part of what makes Tommy's confidence so attractive to Buck.)
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animasola86 · 1 day ago
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🏚️ BONUS: THE HOUSE
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misc!monsters x f!reader 🔥 words: 2.7k
You were invited to a Halloween party in a mysterious house, promising a night full of surprises - which all came true, one way or another. Now it's the next morning, and you're going back to finish that chapter of your life once and for all.
WARNINGS: None? Fluff! Mystery! Some (sexual) implications and references to previous chapters/adventures. Shapeshifting. (READ ON AO3!)
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A/N: This is a bonus chapter for my CHOOSE YOUR OWN ADVENTURE story A NIGHT TO REMEMBER. This references chapters 1, 2 and 6, so it's best to have read those or even better the whole story to understand it. It's just a way to tie up some loose ends. Cameo by an infamous masked man. Spoiler: there's no actual smut here, but it's somehow referenced (come back on Nov 20th for the smut bonus chapter!). 1 🔸 2 🔸 3 🔸 4 🔸 5 🔸 6
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During breakfast (turns out the hairy man is not only a great lover but also a brilliant chef), you find yourself on Bear's lap, feeding and getting fed in a way you've never experienced before. It should be weird how fast you feel this comfortable with him. But it isn't. It's almost as if you've already accepted your new life.
If it wasn't for one thing. The absence of your purse and the remnants of your old life it entails.
“Can we go?” you ask quietly, wiping your index finger over his upper lip, teasing his mustache.
“You sure you left it there?” he responds, watching you closely, a little crease between his heavy eyebrows.
You shift on his lap. “Well, I can't fully remember, as you know,” you start, thinking back to your time at the party that brought you here (and ultimately into his arms). “But I think I left it in the bathroom. I had it when I entered the house, but if I still had it when I ran into you, you would have seen it it, right?”
He hums, nodding slightly as his eyes travel past you through the window. His hand lies heavy on your thigh, squeezing it gently. “I don't want you going back there, though...”
“I know,” you whisper, eyes wandering over his bearded face. “But I need it. As much as I just want to throw my old life away for you, I have to cut off some ties beforehand, and tell people where I am, or at least how I am. I hope nobody's worried yet...”
His hum turns into a low growl. You reach up and cup his cheeks, rubbing your thumbs over the corners of his tight lips. His dark eyes snap back to yours.
“I want to stay, I told you. I'm not going anywhere. But I have to get some stuff, too, you know? Like clothes? I only have this blouse and skirt with me. Unless you really just want to keep me in a cage, bound and gagged and naked...” you tease, raising an eyebrow.
“Tempting image,” he grunts, a chuckle escaping him. “But no, I want you to be comfortable here. And I guess clothes do their part, hm?”
“Yes, they do. I'll still wear your favorite cape whenever you want, don't worry,” you whisper, leaning closer until your nose brushes against his. “I do like red...”
He huffs a loud exhale, warm against your skin, before he tilts his head and presses his lips to yours for a short kiss. “By the way, whatever happened to your underwear, huh?” he mutters into you with a smirk.
You blush deeply, leaning back, your hands moving down to his shoulders. “Well, good question. Maybe I went commando in the first place?”
His hand comes up to brush a strand of hair behind your ear. “Hmm, I'm not sure I can believe that. You may be the adventurous type, or at least, you're open for a little fun, but no panties in late October? I bet your mother taught you better.”
You scoff, smirking back at him. “If I only did what she taught me, I wouldn't be sitting on the lap of a strange mythical creature, would I?”
He gives you a wink. “Little Red sure is known for leaving the beaten path, isn't she?” He watches you for a moment as you smile softly, before he throws his arms around you and hugs you tightly to his chest. “Fine, we'll go. Get that damn purse, you do whatever needs to be done, and then, as soon as the moon rises, you're in for a treat, missy,” he adds, burying his face in the crook of your neck as he holds you close.
You chuckle, snaking your arms around him as well. “Can't wait,” you whisper, closing your eyes for a moment.
Half an hour later, you walk up to the imposing house, Bear's hand tight around yours as he leads you through the garden. Everything looks so different during the day. It's eerily foggy, but the sun still tries to fight its way through the clouds. As you round the building to get to the front door, you realize just how old it looks. The paint is chipped, the wooden sidings aged and weathered and rotten in some places, the metal accents rusty and crooked, the whole structure looks as if it's holding up by sheer willpower (or by the magic that cursed it).
The windows are dark, there's an air of stillness around, and you wonder if anyone is even there to open the door. As you approach the steps leading up to the large entrance doors, Bear nudges you to stop. You turn to him, his tan face almost a little pale as he stares up at the big house. You mirror his concerns. He told you the house calls to the lost souls, trying to trap them with its original inhabitants. You may have found what you were looking for in the hairy man beside you, but what if that's not enough? What if the house won't let you go if you enter?
“It'll be fine,” you whisper, to ease your worries and the creases on Bear's forehead. He looks down at you, his brown eyes almost black. You reach up a hand to caress his cheek, trying to distract yourself with the scraping sound of his beard against your fingertips.
“Maybe you don't have to enter,” he growls quietly, putting his large hands protectively around your waist, pulling you closer. “Try not to tempt fate, okay?”
You lean up on your toes and press your lips to the corner of his mouth, holding his gaze. “It'll be fine,” you repeat. He sighs deeply, but then nods, reluctantly letting go of you as you slip out of his grip.
Giving him a smile, you slowly turn again and face the double doors. Your knock sounds loud through the quiet space. For a long moment, nothing happens. As you raise your hand again to rap your knuckles against the door, you suddenly hear footsteps. The creepy squeak of the door opening is almost comical.
A maid, a young woman, probably your age, in a neat uniform, looks at you, almost a little bewildered, confused, as if she hasn't expected anyone to just knock or even approach the house. “Yes?” she asks, staring at you.
“Uh, hi. I... I've been to the party last night and it seems I've forgotten my purse inside,” you reply hastily, shuffling from one foot to the other.
“Party?” the other woman whispers, frowning deeply, causing you to stare at her with your lips parting.
“Yes, party,” another voice suddenly sounds from behind her, and she is shoved to the side unceremoniously as a man steps next to her. “Silly Daisy, she seems to be a little forgetful today.”
You look up at the stranger, and something comes over you, like a cold wave of déjà-vu. He's tall, muscular, wears black pants and a tight black shirt, his large hands rest on the maid's shoulders for a moment, and you stare at them, following the pronounced veins up his arms. When you reach his face, the feeling is gone. You've never seen this man before, you're sure.
“Go be useful with the others,” he tells the servant girl, and she nods, blinking in confusion as he gives her a gentle push away from the door into the large lobby. You can see others shuffling behind him, probably cleaning up. “Excuse her, it's been a long night,” the man focuses back on you, and you still stare at him. His voice sounds strangely familiar, low, deep, but something's different. It sounds too clear.
“Uh, oh, no problem,” you mutter, furrowing your eyebrows as you look up at him. His eyes are so bright, blue or gray, almost icy in his pale angular face. A smirk plays around his lips.
“So you've lost your purse, huh?” he asks, crossing his strong arms over his chest.
“Yes!” you call out, glad to remember why you came here in the first place. “Have you seen it? It's, uh, this big,” you show him the dimensions with your hands, ”a red clutch, with a red leather strap.”
“Well, we do have a box of forgotten items right here,” he says, tilting his head to indicate to something behind him. Inside the house. “Come have a look.”
You freeze. Your first instinct is to turn around to look at Bear, but to your biggest surprise, you can't see him. Where did he go? Confusion washes over you as you look back at the strange man. Those arms... and hands... the voice. You can't shake the feeling that you know him somehow. When you meet his gaze, he smiles at you. It doesn't reach his eyes.
“Come on, we don't bite,” he says quietly, unfolding his arms to take a step back, giving you the potential space to walk through the door.
“I... I'd rather not... uh... I don't want to invade. You look busy. Can't you just show me the box? Or look for the purse?” you stammer, wringing your hands.
“I would be less busy if you would just come inside and take a look yourself,” he insists, raising an eyebrow.
Your heart sinks. How important is that purse anyway? Then again, why are you so afraid to enter? Surely they won't just abduct you. Your mind goes back to Bear, to his cabin, to the life he's promised you. And you want that, want to be with him, and you will be, if you just think hard enough so that no ancient magic can get its hooks into you. It'll be fine.
Inhaling deeply, you take another look behind you, hoping to see him somewhere. Maybe he isn't allowed near the house, so he waits somewhere behind a hedge or something. “Okay,” you whisper as you turn back to the man waiting for you to enter. “I'll be quick,” you add as you take the first step, your foot already crossing the threshold.
He steps aside, extending an arm to show you which direction that box must be. Your heart beats faster when you hear the door clicking shut behind you. Trying not to fuss about it, you keep walking until you find a large cardboard box on a little table near the pompous staircase leading up. You see various items. Phones, sunglasses, jewelry, scarves, and –
You freeze as your fingers brush against a large white mask. Suddenly another hand moves to grab it, veins and tendons working under tight skin as the man from the door picks up the costume. You gasp as he turns the mask between his long fingers. His icy eyes stare down at you, a smirk dancing around his lips.
“What a silly thing,” he says quietly. “What a lazy way to conceal oneself, hm?”
You blink as your mind reels with a strangely feeble memory. Your stomach tenses up, something hot gathering low in your body. Clearing your throat, you look away, focusing back on the box, your fingers pushing aside all kinds of things, until you finally see something red. Your purse. Clutching it eagerly, you pull it out and inspect it, sighing in relief when you find your wallet, your phone and all the other small things you brought with you.
“Everything in order?” the man beside you asks, still fingering the eerie mask.
“Yes,” you reply, taking a step back as you hug your purse to your chest. “Thanks. I... uh, I'll best be going now. Long way home,” you say, giving him a nervous smile.
He tilts his head, and between his fingers the mask does the same. A cold shiver crashes down your spine. “Sure,” he says. “Best of luck.”
You swallow hard, slowly walking backwards to the entrance door. Your eyes scan the adjacent rooms where people in costumes move about like zombies, slow and uncoordinated, trying to pick up dropped cups, wiping at surfaces. They look familiar as well. A sexy ladybug next to a guy with a white T-shirt that says This is my costume. You frown. You feel like you should remember them more clearly, but your mind is fuzzy.
Clutching your purse, you try to look away, and when your back hits the door, you gasp, your hand finding the door knob. You turn it, and it won't budge. Panic settles inside you. You try again, nothing happens.
Then you feel a body next to yours, towering over you, a hand reaching out to close around your own. You stiffen, bracing yourself as long fingers move your hand around the knob, and the door suddenly opens. Cold air hits your nostrils, and you inhale deeply. Looking over your shoulder, you see the man behind you, except now he is wearing that stupid Ghostface mask, making you jump and shriek as you realize how close he is.
A muffled chuckle escapes him. “Oh little Red, it's so sad to see you go,” he says quietly, his hand moving along your arm until it rests on your shoulder. “You really can't stay?”
You swallow the lump in your throat, trying to ignore the burning between your thighs. “No, I... I don't belong here,” you whisper, slowly inching away from him, your feet so heavy you can barely move.
“Hm, you sure?” he replies, tilting his masked face ominously. “I thought we fit quite well together last night...”
Another gasp escapes you, the memory rushing back into your head with a force that makes you stumble backwards, but as soon as you cross the threshold, standing on the porch, outside, you blink in confusion as it fizzles away again. All that remains is the man in the mask, staring at you, his face unmoving, eerie. A sigh sounds from behind the thick plastic.
One of his hands moves to his pants pocket, and as you watch him, frozen to the spot, trying to figure out what happened, he pulls something out that looks strangely familiar to you. The red cloth you chose to match your costume. Your panties. He unfolds them between his long fingers, and you feel a different kind of heat creeping into your cheeks.
“At least I have this to remember you, hm?” he says quietly, waving the garment at you in a mocking fashion.
You take another step back, breathing harder. “I... I don't know what you're talking about,” you reply, forcing the blurry images away.
“Whatever makes you happy, Red,” he sighs, scrunching up your underwear in his big hand before he pushes it back into his pocket. “Say hi to Bear from me, will you?”
His last words make you pause, your eyebrows furrowing. Before you can inquire what he means, how he can possibly know you're with Bear now, he closes the door so slowly it lets off another eerie squeak. You blink, staring at the old wood.
Somehow you manage to turn around, your feet dragging down the porch steps until you hit the gravel. Your head is spinning. And it only gets worse, when you hear a sudden rustle in a bush close to you. With a low snarl, a big black wolf jumps out of it, yellow eyes boring into you. You shriek in fear, stumbling back, but the animal has already grabbed the hem of your skirt between his sharp teeth, pulling you away from the house.
You loose your footing, landing hard on your already scraped knees, but at least the cold stab of pain is finally enough to clear your muddled head. Breathing harder, you sit on your knees, looking back at the large house behind you, before the wolf nudges your cheek with his wet nose. You turn to him, all the terror gone as you look into his bright eyes. There's nothing malicious about this animal. Your hand reaches out to pet his surprisingly soft black fur.
“Bear?” you whisper, sinking your fingers deeper into his pelt.
The wolf huffs a warm breath against your face before he licks his long tongue all over your cheek. You giggle as you try to get away.
“It's fine, Bear,” you whisper as you wrap your arms around the wolf's neck to get back up on your feet. “It's done. Let's go home.”
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End notes: There will be one more bonus chapter after this: The Marking, focusing back on our werewolf friend. Stay tuned!
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MASTERLIST // AO3 // ORIGINAL WORKS
KINKTOBER 2024 MASTERLIST
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softquietsteadylove · 7 months ago
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Hello birdie 🖤✨
I've got something for the Life Interrupted AU.
Thena isn't feeling well lately and is considering to go back into this hellhole where she's getting drugged to unconsciousness. She's packing her stuff when Gil shows up. He's trying to talk it out of her.
(And I definitely didn't had this Idea because I'm stuck in one of those hellholes, lol)
✨🖤Hugs an Love🖤✨
"Going somewhere?"
Thena sighed, setting down one of her shirts and staring down at her bed. "I was thinking about it."
Gil walked further into her room, having just arrived. "Druig texted me. Really surprised me to hear from him, but he said you've been acting weird--wants me to 'talk to some sense into you'."
Thena let out a humourless chuckle. "I'm surprised he decided to entrust you with that task."
"Gotta say, I am too," Gil agreed quietly until he was standing behind her. "I have to agree--you seem a little anxious lately."
She had been nervous, jumpy, and Gil knew it. They hadn't been able to go out on a date in weeks because she felt on the verge of a panic attack at the thought of having to navigate crowds or risk running into someone. "Maybe...maybe I should consider-"
"Don't," he whispered, placing his hand gently over hers. Her bag was already half full. "Don't say you're going back to that place."
Thena squeezed her eyes shut, tears already burning the insides of them. "Where should I go, Gil?"
"Anywhere else," he concluded. He pulled her hand away from packing up as if she were sailing off into the horizon. He moved slowly and gently until he could sit on the chair in the corner of her room and look up at her. "Please, Thena, just talk to me."
When he was seated lower, she had no excuse not to look at him. But she stared down at his hands, holding hers so, so gently. "Druig and Makkari have been looking at places again."
Gil raised his brows. "That...that's good...right?"
It was. It was what she wanted. She wanted their lives to continue on after the ugliness of the last year. She wanted her brother to feel free to settle down and marry the love of his life. And he could do that without worrying about his sister, she was determined.
"He keeps asking me to see them," she admitted quietly, as if Druig had his ear pressed against the door and would be wounded by overhearing her. "He keeps picking rooms that he says can be mine--if I so choose."
"So," Gil prompted, giving her hands a little squeeze, "what's so bad about that?"
Thena shook her head, looking up around the ceiling of her room to keep her tears from falling. "I'm not some child he has to drag around with him. He should be choosing a home to suit him and his wife, not worrying about his burdensome sister."
"Come on," Gil whispered, his eyes drifting downward from the sheer weight of Thena's discouragement. "You know he doesn't think of you like that."
Thena sighed, pulling her hands from Gil's and plopping herself on the corner of her bed. She pressed them to her head, trying to keep them from shaking. "I know he doesn't. That is exactly the problem."
"Okay, so you don't want him worrying about you," Gil shrugged, turning in the chair to face her head on again.
Thena stared down at her knees. She wasn't wearing her work dress and stockings with a tight ponytail. But she couldn't bring herself to wear soft sweatpants anymore, opting for athleisure leggings and a cardigan at even her most comfortable.
"What else?"
She toyed with her fingernails. "I don't want to live here alone."
Gil nodded again, leaning back in the chair.
She hunched over herself more, despite her sore back. "It's not about the cost, it's...I can't be here by myself, thinking all these...things."
"Okay, so we'll find somewhere else for you," Gil leapt at the opportunity to suggest an alternative. He leaned forward again, even scooching toward the edge of the seat. "I'll help you look."
She smiled, although she still wasn't feeling the intent behind the action. "Druig offered the same. Even Makkari--but that's not the point."
Gil seemed to understand what she was getting at. And of course he did, it was Gil. He was sweet, and understanding, and he always seemed to know what she was trying to say, even if she didn't have the words. "You want to find a place for yourself."
She sighed, looking at her hands again. "I don't seem capable of anything these days."
Gil took her hands in his again, rubbing his thumb over her skin. "You know that's not true."
She wasn't as sure as he was. She never was--never had his confidence, or positivity. It was something she both envied and admired about him. She loved it about him. "Maybe-"
"No!"
She blinked, taken aback by his outburst. He was always so soft spoken, especially with her. She had never heard him so much as raise his voice. The only things he did loudly were laughing and sneezing.
"Maybe nothing!" he pressed, standing from the chair. "That place never did you any good. I don't think it does anyone any good! And I will not let you go back to that misery!"
Thena's eyes fluttered, her back straightening. Her heart began to squeeze at the sheer volume of things, but this was Gil--she was safe with him.
"Thena," he finally quieted again, kneeling in front of her. "You never have to go back to that place, okay? I don't care if you have a nervous breakdown--I'll take care of you. I'll take better care of you than they ever would in there. Just--just promise me you won't go back there because you're worried about burdening people."
She blinked, those tears she was trying to hold back finally falling. It was completely dark outside, her small bedside lamp offering minimal lighting. But it caught Gil's features in just such a way that made him seem so beautiful. "I don't want to go back there."
"Good," he nodded, turning her hand so he could press his lips to it.
"But," she gasped, her lip wobbling. She clung to him. "But what if I'm not me, anymore?"
"You're exactly who you need to be," he said without a hint of doubt in his voice. "You're Thena."
So completely unwavering, her Gilgamesh.
"You're my Thena," he repeated, softer this time, kissing the back of her other hand before pulling her up to stand with him. His hands slipped around waist to rest at her back. "That's all you need to be."
She wasn't sure who 'Thena' was, at times. At least, not as she knew herself before all this. Gil kept saying that the past year was a part of her, for better or worse. But she just wanted to leave it behind--to revert to the version of her that had existed before it all.
"Look," he whispered, still holding her so gently. "Maybe that's easy for me to say. I didn't know you before. But the Thena I know is pretty damn amazing."
She let another laugh, still not humoured in the least.
"She is," he chuckled, though, and he did mean it. He leaned closer, touching his forehead to hers. "She's this badass translator, works in a big, fancy office. She's actually pretty funny, if she's in a good mood. Kinda likes messing with me."
"I do not."
"Just a little," he contested, scrunching up his nose faintly. "But I think that side of her is cute. And she's tough--way tougher than she thinks she is. And she's an incredible sister, even when her brother is being a pain in our ass."
"Our?" she interrupted.
"Our," he confirmed, touching the tips of their noses together to silence her. "And I know he's just worried about you. That's why he keeps saying you can stay with them if you want. But I guess he doesn't really know it's stressing you out."
Thena sighed, dragged back into the depths of her problems like plunging into ice cold water. "How do I tell him?"
Gil skipped over that question, still busy holding her, almost swaying as his weight shifted from foot to foot. "So, this Thena--I mean, to me, she's the most incredible woman in the world."
"Gil," she sighed, trying to pull him from his reverent description of her.
But he nudged her head until he could kiss her lips, also gently. As gently as everything else about him. "She's the woman I love, plain and simple."
Oh, did she ever love him. She had gone from being someone who probably didn't really believe in love for herself at all to being head over heels for her sweet, gentle giant.
She sighed as she kissed him again, leaning up on her toes to loop her arms around his neck. Kissing Gil always made her feel more human--more grounded and real. It took away the buzzing in her head and replaced it with with a heavy and pleasant sedative that could spread through her veins.
Gil stayed close, his forehead against hers, lips still faintly puckered. "Better?"
"Hm," she sighed. She didn't need to explain herself--not to him. She ran her fingers gently through the hair at the back of his head. If only she never had to go to work, or take public transport, or go to house viewings where the realtor would look at her oddly. If only she could stay in Gil's arms every second of every day.
"Good," he sufficed to say, tapping his fingers against the back of her sweater. He moved his hand to her hip. "So, about this living situation-"
"Right," she sighed the heaviest she had yet (which was saying something).
"Hey," he nudged her gently, pulling her eyes up to him. "A unit in my building is going on the market for next month. It's the one above mine--sweet old guy is moving out to be closer to his grand kids."
Oh. Living that close to Gil--being neighbours?
"I can always ask him if he'd be open to a lease trade-off," Gil suggested, although he was unable to hide his excitement at the prospect in his smile. "What do you think?"
Being that close to Gil? Being his upstairs neighbour?
His smile wobbled faintly, turning sheepish as he looked away. "It's a little more modest than this place. But it's a one bedroom, and it's not a bad location. And-"
Thena stood on her toes, pressing her lips to his, even with a cliche 'mmwah' sound. He looked dazed after the firmer kiss, which made her smile genuinely for the first time that night. She leaned against him heavier, but he steadied her without a second thought. "I think that sounds perfect."
"Really?" he asked, beaming like a dog about to receive a treat with a wagging tail.
She took his cheeks in her hands, "it sounds wonderful, Gil."
"O-Okay," he laughed, sounding near hysteria. But he pulled her against his chest in his arms, even lifting her off the ground slightly as he spun them. "This'll be amazing, sweetie, I promise!"
He needed no promises. The thought of having him a mere flight of stairs away was already comforting, in a sense. And she had been to his flat plenty of times. He was right, it was in a good location, and it wasn't any further from her office than she was now, all things considered.
Gil set her on her feet once more. "I'll talk to him tonight."
"Don't get too ahead of yourself," she advised gently. It wasn't often she was able to offer a calming voice of reason these days; it felt familiar, even soothing. She toyed with some some stray hairs of his. "I may have to apply, like everyone else."
"Peh," Gil waved in dismissal again (making her laugh, again). "The old guy loves me. And that's before I tell him some sob story about wanting my girlfriend to move in so we can be closer."
Thena blushed softly, toying with the hem of her cardigan. Sometimes she had to remind herself that Gil wasn't just 'someone she was seeing', and actually the man she had known for more than half a year and had been dating for more than half that time, now.
"It'll be great," he whispered, pressing a kiss to her cheek. "We can carpool to work, I'll be right downstairs if you ever wanna talk--or cuddle."
"Gil," she admonished, but it came out as a light and air whisper as he kissed her cheek again, his five o'clock shadow against her skin.
He stopped nuzzling her just to look at her more solemnly. "You should tell Druig."
"It was your idea."
"Exactly," Gil made a face, shrinking somewhat. "He'll kill me."
Thena rolled her eyes, her spirits lifting by the moment. "It's not as if you're offering to shack up with me yourself."
He didn't laugh at her joke. He didn't even seem to realise it was a joke, just shrugged one shoulder. "I mean they're both only one bedroom units. Plus, I imagine you want some space for yourself for a little. Feel like you have some more control?"
Well, he was exactly right about that, as always. Although she hadn't expected his rebuttal to be that they would need a larger space if they were to live together. She just blinked, "precisely."
"So it's decided," he grinned again, and gave her another kiss for good measure. "I'll go talk to Karun, you talk to Druig. He really is worried about you."
"I know," she mumbled, feeling properly chastised. She unlinked her hands from behind his head and squeezed his forearms. "I'm sure he was desperate to call you."
"And I'm suggesting you move into my building instead of in with him?--he's gonna have my head."
Thena laughed genuinely for the first time that night. "Don't worry, I'll protect you from him."
Gil stared at her in a way that made her toes curl. He bent his head down to sneak into the crook of her neck under her jaw. "I know you will."
She shivered as he left a kiss on her pulse point.
But he left it at that, pulling away and standing to his full height again. It left her feeling chilly, needing to pull her cardigan tighter around herself. "Okay."
Thena nodded, letting him take her by the hand. She did have to talk to Druig--about everything. About moving and also about how she would be okay without him hovering over her shoulder. She would be okay without that hell hole and its medication and she would be okay even if she felt like this different version of herself, possibly forever.
Gil grasped the doorknob with his other hand, the door not fully closed and letting in just a sliver of light from the rest of the house. He held her other hand, giving it a squeeze. "Ready?"
She nodded, holding his hand tighter, just in case she needed it. But she smiled, "ready."
#Thenamesh Life Interrupted AU#I love this au!#and we love you Love!#Thena is feeling worse and worse about Druig moving out before proposing#he's all stressed about her staying with them#but stressed because she doesn't want him to stress#it's a lot going on#so Thena gets more withdrawn thinking about all this#and eventually Druig does the unthinkable#he texts his sister's boyfriend and tells him to get his ass down here and talk to her#they come out of her room#They're holding hands and Thena looks oh so besotted#Druig sits up from the couch holding Makkari like I already don't like this#Thena tells Druig listen she appreciates his concern and she'll come and visit all the time#but she's going to move into Gil's place#and Druig loses his everloving mind#he blows up about how it's too soon and they barely know each other and he doesn't trust Gil enough to let them shack up#and Thena lets him get it all out of his system before finishing saying: Gil's apartment........complex#Makkari: lol#Druig totally loses his steam and just goes oh...well I guess that's not so bad#because Thena knows how to break bad news to her little brother#Druig is still a little wary of it and he still tells Gil that if he ever thinks Thena is upset because of him#he's got a whole lot of hell comin' his way#but he's also a good brother and tells her he'll help her move and he's not going anywhere until she's settled#they haven't settled on a house yet anyway and he won't actually leave until Thena is settled#if she called and said I don't like it here Druig is like okay we're living in the townhouse forever#meanwhile Thena actually wants him to leave the nest so she and Gil can be cutesy flirty neighbours and carpool and have sleepovers
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forcebookish · 1 month ago
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accountability post!!!!!!!!!! (in no particular order)
write 300+ words (that's how much i wrote yesterday and it's a much more realistic goal than 500 or 1000 given what i'm working on and i always like a goal where i am more likely to overperform than underperform lol)
edit #18 whumptober gifs (typo) ✅
make arcarm gifs ✅️
make phoomvicha gifs ✅️
make #19 whumptober gifs ✅️
answer asks ✅️
let's goooooooooooo
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narwhalandchill · 1 year ago
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methinks about that one leak way back of admittedly highly uncertain reliability but was nonetheless claiming that childes character during early genshin development (at least at one point) was unaligned with the fatui and instead written as like the actual canonical travel companion to aether/lumine in the games story.
and then like. looks at his constellation quite literally depicting and directly linking him to an interdimensional being endlessly voyaging among the stars.
its curious. preeetty curious.
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whatudottu · 1 year ago
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Bare with me, I've got an idea that combines TFP Shockwave's invention of the cortical psychic patch, what motivation a Shattered Glass Shockwave might have made it, plus more broad cybertronian biology headcanons and how it lead to the invention of the cortical psychic patch in the first place-
Um... let's go!
To start, let's go in reverse order by talking cybertronian biology, or more specifically the more wire based functions of a more literal less sex version of interface panels. Because cybertronians are biomechanical aliens who's only method of 'reproduction' canonically (in most series) is through being birthed by the planet itself - on hold while Primus and Cybertron are dead - when I say 'interface panels' I mean panels housing plugs and ports that are typically there for medical stuff and otherwise data transfers or for use in hardware depending on the individual. The number of panels is relatively consistent and the number of in/out connections depends on the size of the bot (more for larger frames, less for smaller) and are kinda paired to whatever systems they are nearest location wise; two on either side of the hips or one each at the top of the legs, two on either side of the chest or one each at the top of the arms.
Depending on the location you can read the diagnostics of that part of the frame in more detail than if you tried investigating the same part in an entirely different panel; you're gonna get a more accurate read on damages to the left arm in the left arm panels then you are on the right leg. And for particular frames, the interface panels are used to control objects using the relevant limb or part - like a robotic arm to lift things heavier than your frame can handle - and probably even to have your frame be used AS a limb; combiner limbs would connect to whoever's the main body and interface with the relevant limb panel.
But there are panels that are explicitly medical use only, that being internal panels adjunct to the sparkchamber as well as another for specific monitoring of a cybertronian's organs, and paneling at the back of the helm or where it meets the neck for the processor and all the delicate software it holds. Bots with medical programing like Ratchet can interface with those panels directly in the event of a lack of resources (AKA the entirety of Transformers: Prime), and in fact the panel along the sparkchamber would be the easiest way to get a general systems check on a patient. Mecha like Knock Out who may or may not have actual history with being a medical doctor probably would have a harder time directly interfacing with the more delicate sparkchamber, organ, and processor panels, but he and Ratchet (and other bots with even the vaguest sense of medical training) can set up a line running to a monitor or sparkreader or any other medical hardware to fully take in a data analysis, even if it means more resources are used or that vulnerabilities could be introduced.
To the processor panel, much like brain surgery you kinda need a signal in the first place in order to get a read on it's damages, hardware or software. A spark read can let you know if the body is alive and all the damages that IT can diagnose for a general check, but operating on an offline or barely awake processor can lead to issues that you may not even be aware of at the time of procedure. It's why a direct connection (with appropriate medical coding) is better for processor diagnosis as the hardware bypass might have a signal delay between patient and doctor.
And here's where the cortical psychic patch comes in.
When Megan was otherwise comatose, the cortical psychic patch was able to allow access into his processor that had been percolating with activity (one described by Knock Out to be like 'a dream he may never wake from'), and though far from being an actual medical use of the patch it did allow for a non-medical bot to access the processor of a very much comatose patient. It was even Ratchet himself - resident medic of the Autobots - that knew how to create the patch even if it was banned for Autobot use.
Keeping in this reverse order, perhaps a SG Shockwave had invented the cortical psychic patch for an intended medical use, a tool meant for mecha who may not have been forged nor coded to BE medics but have enough training to be such (typically self-taught in the early stages of revolution, then mentored by forged medics when the war really picked up speed) in order to allow direct access to the processor interface panel. The design of it would be - rather than a plug that just magnetically sticks on to the back of a cybertronian's head - would be a series of plugs and ports of mostly universal design, adjustable to a degree for multiple frames, allowing the medic irrespective of coding to have full access to diagnose what the fuck is up with the processor.
Unfortuneately for SG Shockers (and fully intentional by TFP Shockwave) the patch isn't quite as synonymous as the medic's coding is to processor interfacing, being rather invasive of a connection even as it is, let alone the patch being more of a hardware connection which in of itself introduces vulnerabilities. Heck, it's not even safe for the operator themselves to use the patch, seeing as how Bumblebee got a head full of Megan; I mean, Bumblebee isn't a trained medic, but the fact that it happened at all is evidence to it's flaws. And that's to a patient who isn't of mind enough to struggle, Shockwave himself says that resisting the patch may cause damage to the patient/subject, combine that with the second option of 'let it happen and let them walk unabated in your head' and you're pretty much shit out of luck.
The base Shockwave would most certainly be fully aware of the intent, a direct hardline to an individual's processor is most definitely a connection to some very vulnerable software and thus information, the cortical psychic patch probably battling a lot of firewalls off with the ease of a medical interface. And in the base TFP universe, Autobots with only recent war-based medical training as opposed to previous education probably early on DID resort to using the patch as a crutch, Ratchet after all knew how to make one. It's probably a combination of Shockwave's brutal interrogation method USING the cortical psychic patch and the relatively inexperienced Autobot medics opting to use direct processor interface rather than the comparably safer hardware bypass that lead to it's banned status in the Autobot ranks, too many 'Bots were having trauma responses at the hands of young medic's servo's who didn't know any better and actively resisting the patch, which just so happened to lead to more Autobot casualties and thus probably shellshocking the medics in training to get them to fear the daunting prospect of actually losing a patient by THEIR OWN hands.
It's one thing to be using a tool made by someone who has been known to do lots of dubious shit, it's another to see a tool that you made to help be manipulated into an interrogation technique, made all the worse now that you have significantly more emotional capacity to not only feel guilty but feel solely responsible for the patch induced trauma of your own allies; the cortical psychic patch was banned by the Shattered Glass Decepticons for about similar reasons, but it's near worse for a lot of medics (even the experienced ones) had been relying on it solely for the fact that they weren't forged with the coding. The stagnated use of the cortical psychic patch in the base verse was mostly because Shockwave himself had been the inventor of it and main user of the patch, the Autobots avoiding it's use for the ban and the Decepticons not very experienced with the tool. In Shattered Glass however, the only real limit to it's perpetuity would be if the Autobots managed to learn how to create the patch at all, which if even in the base verse Ratchet knew how to make one, probably means that there's more than enough patch use in SG even if Shockwave gets caught in a spacebridge explosion or not.
And that's that I think- funny to talk about interface panels in a transformers post without doing it in a sex way haha- I just want these guys to be alien 😫
#shockwave#tfp shockwave#shattered glass#tfp shattered glass#transformers#tfp#maccadam#xenobiology#i like to conceptualise that there are 6-8 maybe interface panels at a minimum#with a number of ports and plugs that i haven't determined yet but maybe depending on what panel 4ish? idk#i would probably not count because the number might seem off so i'll just say that there's probably a few each#even though i mentioned interface panels in more of a machine or medical way i guess technically it can be used for recreation#those tend to be the external panels though or if 'intimate' aka low-key dangerous and definitely vulnerable#it would be through the sparkchamber panel/s that a doctor would not recommend you doing all willy nilly#even though ko actually goes ahead and implies 'interfacing' is akin to human sex (see 'plus one')#i do believe it's more 'how do i translate what i see to what words i know' plus 'this is a kids show we can't say sex'#the act of connecting one person to another? interfacing#because these bitches are alien they still have interfacing panels in altmode#it's wherever their limbs go and if their spark is anywhere near where the people go#since two wheelers and open four wheelers (like quad bikes and technically dune buggies) don't have a cabin#you're not gonna particularly find any paneling inside a cockpit or under a roof#you could probably have some 'technically' internal panels but functionally not not THE internal panels#internal panels would be actual organ and brain stuff not paneling that happens to reside inside a cockpit or in a dashboard#all these tags are talking about the details of interface panels i realise this post isn't completely about the panels#i would say in recreational interfacing between bots or through hardware you're not gonna be able to access a lot of stuff medics can#unless you're a super hacker like soundwave your firewalls prevent fuckers from reading your mind and can only really be described as#feeling what it's like to have another person's frame which is- technically intimate i suppose#sparkchamber to sparkchamber you might get some extra with the same stipulation that sparkchamber panels offer a global general check#still up to the behest of actual medical coding (or hacker mode) to get actually 'interactive' between systems but you get a bit more info#on the other through sparkchamber connections
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simcardiac-arrested · 1 year ago
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hehehe ns gets called back again and forgets. nwb thinks this is delibarate on ns' part to wipe it all away. up until
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HELPPP CHICKEN BONE STUMPS OF WINGS. you conjure such a beautiful world
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poppyseed799 · 1 year ago
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Brother why are there so many roaches we have had TWO full exterminations and BOTH TIMES the roaches came back. The first time there were less of them for a week (still some) but the second time there was absolutely zero difference in the number of roaches even immediately after the extermination. Like man. What am I supposed to do about this
#they’re in all the appliances dawg how am I supposed to cook 😭#and my sister is just like ‘just move out!!!’ brother WHERE#she is actually moving out on the shortest notice imaginable cuz she can’t deal with the roaches#going to our ex step fathers house cuz she already planned to move in there with her partner#but now she’s going there early cuz of the roaches#and like okay sure but WE can’t move in there. and yet she’s like ‘find a new place!’ brother we renewed the lease#and also do you know how the world works nowadays you can’t move anywhere it’s always more expensive 😭#we’re like frogs in boiling water#I jumped ahead with that metaphor but I’m too lazy to backtrack to explain how I got there#anyways yknow the roach guys said the infestation was REALLY bad and they wanted to do a follow up#but idk when that follow up is cuz it’s been a month since the extermination and there has been 0 difference. as soon as we came back to the#apartment there were still roaches on the walls#like man what am I supposed to do they’re everywhere and it would be so hard to move out 😭#vent#<- figure I’ll add that cuz like. that’s what this is. my life is just not great rn. constantly hungry too cuz we struggle with groceries#and I’m too scared to make myself some food cuz of the obscene amount of roaches. there was a roach in the dinner last night. then my mom#invited us to dinner at her place and refused to get us dinner.#said she wanted to hang out and didn’t talk to me so wtf#it’s just not going well. I posted happily about how I got those gifts but honestly I can’t even enjoy them because there’s too many roaches#like I don’t know where to put things so that roaches don’t get them. there’s no safe space.
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pepprs · 2 years ago
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my dad might have fucking covid. about to jump off a bridge
#purrs#he was unmasked in my future room with the contractors yesterday and one of them woke up sick this morning and stayed in bed all day and now#my dad is feeling sick and my mom isn’t even better yet and i just saw so many people (WHO ARE VULNERABLE / HAVE VULNERABLE FAMILY MEMBERS)#in the last couple of days and now i might have exposed them. i am about to LOSE my shit. i need all respiratory diseases to die immediately#i am TIRED of living in constant fear. and i am FURIOUS at my dad for not wearing a mask.#like do you people NOT FUCKING GET IT. You may be cavalier. you may say you don’t care if you get it you can fight it off. BUT YOU INTERACT#WITH OTHER PEOPLE. who may not WANT to get sick. Who may not be able to DURVIVE getting sick. WHAT IS SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND. if you see#someone wearing a mask they are doing that FOR A REASON!!!! TO PROTECT THEMSELVES!!!!! TO PROTECT THEIR LOVED ONES!!!!! so fucking WEAR ONE#OUT OF COURTESY! USE YOUR FUCKING BRAIN! i don’t care if they’re hard to breathe in. I don’t care if they’re uncomfortable. I don’t care if#it’s your own house and you’re not used to it. SUCK IT UP. you can be uncomfortable for five minutes. you KNOW how anxious we all are about#getting covid and you DIRECTLY endanger us and now i might have put other people in danger. and i didn’t even choose it I didn’t do anything#wrong. FUCK COVID. fuck this collective punishment nightmare. I am SO TIRED of living in constant fear because OTHER PEOPLE want to pretend#it’s over. it fucking ISNT. there are things I care about. there are people I care about. and if you were a decent fucking human being you#would understand that and MASK UP. not everyone gets to be so glib about it. it’s hard enough being seen as fucking insane and still taking#damage from having basicaly 0 social life because im too afraid to go anywhere or do anything it’s harder when people around me who i can’t#help but interact with exhibit that they do not actually care about how it is improtant to me that i do not get sick or get my loved ones#sick ESPECIALLY when it is my loved one himself who KNOWS how scared shitless we all are. it fucking hurts so bad. fuck covid. FUCK covid.#delete later#like. despair. i can wear my n95 mask all i want but i am still fucking HELPLESS when people around me don’t. despair. DESPAIR.
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rose-coloured-boy · 2 years ago
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you would think they WANT this fucking virus to run rampant given how hard it is to get test kits these days. fucking hell.
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