#not sure why they bother to make shit up cause they're going to hate on him no matter what

[fromtheseventhhell]

"Rhaegar is a prophecy obsessed man"

"He doesn't love anyone"

"He just wanted prophecy babies"

???

Did i miss something in the books? I get it, Rhaegar cared for the prophecy because the threat of the others is real, but why do people believe this dude is a fucking robot? O.o

Also, didn't Grrm call him "love struck prince"?

You didn't miss anything in the books, fandom just loves coming up with reasons to justify their hatred toward Rhaegar. Portraying him as a soulless, heartless monster just makes that easier than using what's actually written about his character.

[gay-dorito-dust]

Hi hi! Can I request an angsty/fluff piece with Jason? Maybe he hasn't told her that he's Red Hood yet, and they want to tell him that she loves him for the first time, but with his constant disappearances at night they're thinking that he's starting to get tired of them?

This went a little too long when I decided to stop, so I might need to split this into two parts if needs be 🦦

‘Hey honey,’ you greeted Jason with a peck to the cheek, pulling away smiling brightly. ‘Are you all ready for movie night tonight? I’ve already got a couple films set up and ready to go and I promise none of them will make you cry like last time.’

Jason grimaced. Shit, he knew that something was happening tonight but couldn’t remember what and -like a dumbass- had agreed to going out on a patrol with Dick and Damian later on. ‘Oh, I’m so sorry chipmunk I can’t do movie night tonight. Can we do it next week?’ Jason hated how he was the one who made the smile upon your face disappear as quickly as it came, he hated how he was the reason why the excitement left your eyes, only to be replaced by a look of poorly concealed disappointment.

Jason hated how it seemed as of late that his commitment to being a vigilante had been the leading cause of your unhappiness. While he was out clearing Gotham almost every night, you were left in your shared apartment, left to sleep alone in a bed that was designed for two people and ponder how things could’ve gotten to this stage; wondering whether this was a relationship worth being in after all.

You sighed, trying to be understanding but how could you when this was the third time Jason had bailed on you this week. It didn’t seem fair to keep trying at this point when it seems as though you’re the only one who is actively trying to make time for each other. You had planned to tell Jason you loved him tonight but all that was thrown into the bin, all because he apparently forgot all about it. ‘It’s fine Jason, I’m sure whatever you have going on is inherently more important.’ You said, feeling more hurt than anything as you clenched your jaw to stop yourself from saying something you’ll inevitably regret.

‘I’ll make it up to you-‘

‘Would you like to know how many times you claimed that you’ll make it up to me but never have?’ You asked Jason rhetorically and watched his face further become into one of guilt. ‘Three. Times.’ You told him, holding up three fingers. ‘Once is excusable, but three times Jason. I thought you were over making false promises, much like how I’d trick myself into thinking that you would actually like to spend time with me in our own apartment, but it seems like I was wrong as per usual.’ You scoffed.

Jason tried to reach out for your hand to console you, but you immediately took it away before he could and put a good deal of distance between the two of you to show that you were in need of comfort but not from him. ‘Y/n, I’m sorry-‘

‘Don’t bother. Just make sure to have your keys on you before you leave because I wont stay up for you anymore.’ Was all you said before leaving the room to go into your room, where you’d stay until he left for the night doing god knows what. His disappearing act didn’t bother you at first but when it become more frequent and grew more obstructive when you wanted to spend the night with him, a pit in your stomach grew and it had been growing ever since followed by thoughts that doubted Jason’s loyalty to you.

Were you boring him but he didn’t have the heart to tell you? Is that why he’s been disappearing almost every night or so? Just so he could meet up with someone else behind your back and shit talk you? If that was the case then he could stay out for all you cared, you’ve given him your heart but it didn’t seem as though he couldn’t bring himself to even fake in giving a shit.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Meanwhile Jason felt like the biggest dickhead ever. He could tell that you were reaching the end of your rope with him and he wasn’t so sure that he could go back to living by himself if you were to ever leave him, he could try but it wouldn’t be the same when you were the reason his apartment felt like an apartment at all. And yet he has no one else to blame for this but himself.

He was the reason you could’ve have a simple date night at home.

He was the reason for your frequent disappointment.

He was the reason you no longer felt loved by him but that just wasn’t true. Jason loved you so much it physically hurt and scared the poor man of what he was willing to do for you. Jason’s love for you burned him in the most delicious way imaginable, he was left wanting for more, hooked on your love as though it was an easily addictive drug sweeping the streets of Gotham. However even Jason couldn’t ignore the wedge between him and you, a wedge that only seemed to get worse the more Jason bailed on you for his vigilante business.

As he was sulking in the fact that this might be the end of your relationship, Jason got a text from Dick asking where he was and all Jason could think of whilst grabbing his keys and leaving the apartment, was how he was going to make up for every night that you felt as though you were abandoned by him; and if anyone who knew Jason best knew he was anything but a quitter.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Movie night was depressing as shit when you were having it all by yourself as a way to cope with the fact that you might not be enough to keep Jason interested.

You were bundled up in bed, hugging your childhood plushie tightly against your chest as you watched a movie adaptation to one of Jason’s most favoured book out of Jane Austen‘s body of work. Hell most of the movies you’ve picked out were based on Jason’s favourite author but you weren’t enjoying it as you would if he was beside you, muttering the lines alongside the characters under his breath as he held you against his chest as though you were something precious; even going so far at to using the excuse that when a kissing scene happens you should be kissing too for a more immersive experience.

He was such a dork but he was your dork and now it feels as though he didn’t want to be called yours anymore.

You didn’t know what it was that you did for him to get bored of you but it hurt like a motherfucker and the more you thought about it the more your eyes began to well up with unshed tears. ‘What am I doing wrong snuffles?’ You brought your plushie to face you with its beady button eyes. ‘Am I really that much of a bore that he can’t bring himself to just end it? What does he get out of dragging me along? Is this some sick joke to him?’ You asked and you asked but got no response, then again that’s what you get when trying to seek answers from a weighted plushie.

‘Who am I kidding.’ You uttered defeatedly as you put down your plushie, switched off the tv after seeing that there was no point in having it on in the first place, and stared up at the ceiling as you tried to will sleep to hurry up and claim you. ‘Did you know that I was planning on telling him that I loved him?’ You asked aloud for no one in particular, smiling weakly as you wiped your eyes. ‘How stupid was it of me to think that we’d ever last. He’s obviously found someone else who doesn’t bore him as easily as I do…so why should I stay?’ You felt yourself wanting to cry again but you were too tired to give your body what it wants and tried to ignore the lump in your throat by forcing your eyes shut.

*knock, knock, knock*

[reareaotaku]

Hello it's me Rachel. Listen um sorry for the bother you but can you make a yandere losers club headcanon movie it 2017 ?

It's no bother! Of course I can!

Yandere Losers Club Headcanons

Characters: Bill Denbrough, Eddie Kaspbrak, Richie Tozier, Stanley Uris, Beverly Marsh, Mike Hanlon, Ben Hanscom [Also, I looked up the Jewish stuff for Stanley, so if I got anything wrong lmk]

Bill Denbrough

He gets really shy around you

Stutters a lot and he never really gets over it, no matter how he tries

You're way out of his league and he's surprised when you ask him out

But oh my god, you really want to date him

"Do you want to go out with me?"

He looks at you shocked, his mouth on the floor. At first, he thinks you're trying to pull a prank on him or making fun of him, but you're dead serious

"Oh- W-w-what?"

"Do you want to go out with.... me?" You gesture to yourself at the end, your confidence quickly fading in fear you were about to be rejected

"Uh-uh-uh, um...y-ye-yeah. I'd l-l-l-love to."

Now it's your turn to blush and you smile, "Great. That's great. So what now?"

"I don't know..."

It's a little awkward at first, but you both eventually get over it

His friends tease him, but Bill always brings up about how they're all single [It usually ends the teasing]

He always dresses up whenever he's going to see you

He just wants to look his best

Eddie Kaspbrak

You meet at his favorite place, the pharmacy

He knew who you were and you vaguely knew who he was

He had a huge crush on you and when he saw you, he nearly shit bricks

He quickly put the stuff he was holding back on the shelf, while accidentally knocking stuff down

"Uh, you're Eddie, right?"

He awkwardly laughs, his face turning a light red, "Uh, yeah. Y/n?"

"Yeah. What are you doing?"

"Nothing!" He's quick and nearly yells it at you, causing you to flinch back. He instantly felt bad about it

You only knew two things about Eddie; He's a germaphobe and his mom is crazy

"You're that germaphobe, right?"

His eyes widen and he quickly shakes his head, "No! I'm not scared of germs. That's crazy," He laughs it off, moving his hand back and forth. He blushes when hearing you laugh and he looks away from you

"You're really cute. Do you want to hang out?"

"Hang out? You and me?"

"Yeah, there's actually a diner close by-"

"Of course. I mean yeah, that'd be cool"

You start hanging out more after that and Eddie is secretly losing his mind

You're hanging out with him

Wow- He feels like he's dreaming

When you ask him to be your boyfriend, he's sure that he's dead and in heaven

Richie Tozier

You both fucking hate each other when you first met

You bully the hell out of each other, trying to get the last word

"Why are you late?"

"Sorry, I was fucking your mom."

"Well, I'm glad you could enjoy someone's mom since you don't have one"

He rolls his eyes, mocking you, because he has no insult to throw back without sounding like he was offended

Things change when he gets older and he realizes that he likes you

it started when he'd see things in his everyday life that reminded him of you

At first he was irritated and he wanted to destroy those things [Flowers, rocks, tree bark, a cloud, the way his food is placed, a game/game character, etc]

But then, he realized these things made him happy. You made him happy, even when he tried to fight it

He began to cherish these things and anything he could preserve and keep, he would

He has a shrine dedicated to those things. Nothing ever directly linked to you, but just things that make his mind go to you

Neither of you will ask the other out, because you two are two prideful- Actually, it'll be an accident when one of you confesses

You two will be fighting and one of you will comment about how the other is pretty/handsome as an insult and the other turns around and is like "You like me?" You'll be blushing and the person who insulted the other will deny it, but whoever was insulted will be like "I like you two."

Stanley Uris

Stan is very mature for a boy his age and that's what attracts you to him

He doesn't really notice you at first, because he doesn't have time for dating and he's more worried about keeping his things in order

You try approaching him multiple times, but you usually get shrugged off

You can go to the temple and wait until after Prayer hall, Shacharit, or the morning blessings, but he'll probably spot you and avoid you. If you're not Jewish, you'll approach his father, the Rabbi, telling him about your interest in the culture

"You can't just be Jewish. You know that right? It's a long progress-"

"I'm okay with that. I'm interested in the culture, language, and history"

He's impressed with your knowledge and interest that he's willing to take you under his wing

Stanley then becomes jealous, because you're becoming closer with his father than he ever was

You get progressively better at speaking from The Torah

"There's this girl who keeps coming to the Temple. I've been avoiding-"

"Wait, there's a girl who's actively seeking you out and you're avoiding her??? Because???"

Stanley rolls his eyes, "It-"

"Is she ugly?"

"No-"

"Are you gay?"

"What? No-"

"Then why are you avoiding her?"

"It's stupid-"

"Spit it out."

"Well, she's not even Jewish, but my dad treats her like she's been going to the Temple her whole life. So, she learns a little Hebrew so what? Anyone can do that."

"Oh, you're jealous and have daddy issues. Got it"

His father acts kind of like your dad. Tries setting you up with a good guy so you'd be set for later in life. Get you incredible connections

When you'll finally get him alone, he busts. He yells at you and he realizes all his anger about his father out on you

Though, when he sees you cry, he quickly stops and he feels so bad

He didn't mean to make you cry. God he felt so bad

He quickly apologizes and this creates a friendship between you both

You can tell him any secret. He'll never tell a soul

You can depend on him for anything. You're the only thing his father likes about him

"Why can't you have Y/n's dedication? She wasn't even born into a Jewish family."

He complains to you about his father, and you're always open to listen to him

Though, he's scared of nearly everything, so you usually are the braver one in the relationship

You have to beg him to go anywhere with you, because he doesn't like being around people

He just sticks with you the entire time

Beverly Marsh

She was very confident when approaching you, but it was fake

She's the type of person to lean on some boxes and then they fall over

She loves brushing and playing with your hair

She thinks it [your hair] is so pretty

She'll hum to you while she brushes it/plays with it

She asked you out. She was very bold about it

She goes after what she wants and she wants you

She'll make sure the moment is perfect

You're alone and the night is beautiful [Though nothing like you]. The wind is blowing just right and the light from one of the post is shinning your face like a halo

If you ever get into a fight with her, she'll avoid you for days/weeks

She doesn't want to, but it's a tactic she knows will get you crawling back

Mike Hanlon

He puts your needs before his own

He's sweet and whenever you have a problem he's always there to listen

He's a smart kid and will always help you with your homework

And by help, I mean he'll do it for you

Hope you like band music, because that's his favorite type of music

He does have a tiny little issue where he lies to make you happy. He's scared of losing you and just wants to keep you close

He doesn't do it on purpose, it kind of just happens

When you find out, you're livid and he understands, but he doesn't apologize. He think he's doing the right thing

You can be mad at him, but you'll always get over it, because you can never be mad at him for long

He doesn't gaslight you on purpose, but he does do it sometimes

"So what, you don't love me anymore?"

"Of course I love you!"

"Well, you're sure not acting like it-"

Ben Hanscom

He's really insecure about himself and his weight, thankfully you make him not feel like he's a pig

In fact, you don't mention it all; It's not something you notice

You always pick up when he's sad and always do whatever it takes to cheer him up

You try and help him cope with it healthy

Though, as he gets older, he starts to work out and you go with him. You don't want him to feel like everyone's staring at him or something

Whenever he's feeling like people are judging or staring you'll always divert attention to yourself, whether it's wearing something crazy or just making yourself look different and wild, you're willing to have people judge you as long as he doesn't feel judged [Does that make sense?]

He never judges you. In fact, he thinks you're way to good for him

Everything you do for him just makes him realize you're to good for him

If you're ever insecure, he's surprised

"What? You're like the prettiest person in the world! " He's absolutely flabbergasted

Absolutely adores you and follows you like a puppy

Practically attached to your hip

Bro's a little dependent on you ngl

[whatsk-poppinhomies]

Pairing : Seo Changbin x F!Reader TW : reader suffers from migraines ; arguments ; i'm gonna make this one absolutely vicious, i love writing arguments ; angst of course as usual ; Word Count : 2.6k Request : @kurolils : I'll try not to give a lot of details cause it's your story not mine but I was thinking of something angsty (ofc wtf) with changbin (ofc wtf) , like the reader and him got into a really bad argument (you can decide the plot of that) and she has really bad migraines (I'm relating here) so when they're mad at each other, she doesn't want to be pushy pr clingy so she doesn't say anything to him but when the migraine gets like really bad, she calls him :) AN : migraines are so fricking bad and I hope yours don't affect you too badly :'( BUT! It definitely isn't abusive to send in another request, send in all the requests you want!!! I love it! I love your ideas! And Binnie definitely needs more attention in my ask box (and in my masterlist)!

Here comes another one, you thought to yourself as you squeezed your eyes shut, trying to mentally ward off the sudden throbbing in your head, pinging right behind your eye. Just one more hour until you could get off work and go home, and then you’d see your boyfriend who always managed to make you feel better… Although you weren’t sure if the migraine actually went away or if his presence alone was enough to have you forgetting that it was there in the first place. 

“Is it bothering you again?” Your coworker asked, leaning across the counter that you had been slouched over, trying to block out anything that would only add to the pain in your head. You simply grunted in agreement, not daring to lift your head, worried that the bright fluorescent lights would only trigger the migraine to start full force once again. “It’s dead here today, you can go home if you want. I’m sure the last thing you want to deal with are customers.” 

He was right, the store was always dead at the beginning of the week, and you hated being scheduled those days. “You’re sure you’ll be okay?” You asked, your head still buried in your arms. He hummed softly in agreement, gently patting your shoulder before making his way around to the back of the counter to take your spot. “Thanks… I’ll cover one of your shifts if you ever need me to.” You said as quietly as possible, worried that your own voice meeting your ears would only worsen the throbbing in your head. 

“Don’t worry about that, just text me when you get home so I know you made it there okay.” And you nodded to his words, pulling your sunglasses out of your bag and placing them on before walking out of the store. He was always so nice, he looked out for you, and in a way, he reminded you a lot of your boyfriend, that’s why it was so easy to get so close to him. You’d have to remember to thank him when you got home, but all that was on your mind right now was the pleasant thought of going home, closing all the blinds, and waiting that extra hour for Changbin to get home so you could cuddle up next to him. 

You hadn’t realized that you had fallen asleep on the couch, but you were actually quite happy that you did. By the time Changbin walked through the front door and your eyes slowly opened, it felt like you were in the clear, the banging pain in your head had all but completely subsided. “You’re home early.” Changbin commented, noticing that all the windows had been practically blacked out by the shutters and the shades, he knew what it meant, and he kept his voice as low as possible as he kicked off his shoes and walked over to the couch where you were laying. “Did it get bad again?” 

Slowly nodding your head, you pushed yourself up into a sitting position and stretched, ready to make room for Changbin to scoot in beside you. “Jaemin saw that I was hurting and he said I could go home… Oh… Shit, I have to text him to thank him.” You muttered, pulling your phone out and unlocking it, so focused on sending out the text that you didn’t even hear Changbins sigh of annoyance. “Did you want to order something to eat and watch a movie or something?” You asked after sending out the text, placing your phone down on the coffee table and scooting over. 

“Why don’t you just ask Jaemin to come over and watch the movie with you.” Changbin mumbled, eyeing the spot that you made beside yourself for him to sit in before dropping down into the recliner behind him. “He can even take you out to a fancy dinner or something.” The thumping in your head was slowly returning, accompanied by the pounding of your heart that you could hear in your ears, although you weren’t sure if it was racing because you were upset or because you were angry. 

Changbin had never made such accusations before, and while he hadn’t flat out accused you of such a thing, you could read into his words and his tone and you knew exactly what he meant. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. You’re just being ridiculous.” You muttered, deciding to stretch out on the couch once more since he was being that way. “Do you want to order dinner or not?” You asked, not even bothering to open your eyes as you asked the question. 

“I don’t know, maybe we should ask Jaemin what he wants just in case he comes over to check on you.” Changbin snidely retorted and your eyes rolled behind your eyelids as you let out a small huff of air through your nose. “Or maybe… maybe I should just go back to the dorms and you and Jaemin can enjoy a nice little dinner in my house watching my TV.” He sounded so cocky and truthfully it was disgusting, and it made your head hurt worse. 

“I’d argue with you, I’d give you that satisfaction if my head wasn’t already pounding… But you knew that when you came in and you continue to bicker. So maybe you should leave, or maybe I should leave. Clearly you’ve got some shit going on, and truthfully, I can’t fucking handle it right now.” You snapped, taking a deep breath and sinking deeper into the cushions of the sofa, waiting to hear the sound of the recliner moving back into place when Changbin got up, but it was silent. Was he just going to sit there and continue the foolish argument until your head felt like it was going to explode? 

The short answer… Yes. Yes he would. “If I leave you’ll just have him come over… And if you leave, you’ll just run to him. Either way you and him are getting exactly what you want, right? Why string me along if he’s so much better? Huh?” You honestly didn’t know where this was coming from, but the more he assumed, the angrier you got. 

“You know what? It’s fucking bullshit that you come in here, pretending to give a shit about me, saying shit like… like people at my work should be more understanding of what I go through… And then when there’s one fucking employee who does notice, who does understand, you jump to these batshit insane conclusions that couldn’t be further from the truth. Nothing will make you happy! My head hurts enough already, and then trying to think of ways to fucking please you only makes it hurt worse. So if you’re going to just keep coming at me, I’d rather you not… Or at least wait until I can take another ibuprofen and my headache clears up enough to handle more of your bullshit.” You snapped, your voice cracking as your throat closed up. You were on the verge of tears, although it wasn’t from being upset, it was from being angry and in pain and you just wanted to sleep it all away. 

“You know what, I’ll just go.” Changbins hands flew up in the air before slapping down against his lap as he pushed himself up to his feet. “Make sure Jaemin takes his shoes off before he walks on my carpet though.” He always had to have that last word, the last jab of the knife. If you had the energy, you would have flipped him off, but you were just exhausted. You didn’t have the energy to fight, you didn’t even want to fight, he had started it. It wasn’t until you heard the front door slam shut that you finally let yourself cry, but even that was tiresome, and you ended up just crying yourself to sleep. 

You weren’t quite sure how much time had passed, but you were happy to see that the sun had finally set, unless it was in the wee hours of the morning and it was just about to rise. That happiness quickly died when you remembered what had happened right before you fell asleep, the sudden lonely feeling and the feeling of emptiness shrouding you like a cloak as you looked around the empty apartment.

At the moment, it didn’t matter though. You knew that he was okay, he was probably at the dorms with the guys having a great time to get his mind off of what he thought was going on. Meanwhile, you still hadn’t eaten and your stomach was now growling at you to feed it. You could get through the rest of the night without him, maybe it was for the best if you both had some distance from each other as much as you hated it. 

You thought you’d be okay, you were okay, you had made it to the kitchen, you had gotten the food out of the fridge, you had managed to even start preparing it, but then, as if from out of the dark, it kicked in again. This time it was worse, or maybe it just felt worse because everything else that was going on. It truly felt like your head had been slammed into a brick wall and your vision became blurry and you felt sick and everything was just awful and you couldn’t help but cry as you dropped down to the kitchen floor, your knees curling against your chest, your hand fumbling for your phone in your pocket as you called the only person you knew could help. 

“Look, I said that I’d leave. You said you wanted space. I don’t want to argue, I think we should just talk about this-” 

“B-Binnie…” You whimpered, sniffling loudly as your body trembled, trying not to throw up, trying so hard to not focus on the pain, but trying not to focus only made it hurt worse. His end was quiet though, aside from the distant murmuring of some of the guys, although you couldn’t make it out, especially considering you were breathing so heavily from crying, the only thing you could really hear was your own whimpers and sobs. “Please come home…” 

The sound of a car door, and then the revving of an engine. “I’m coming, sweetheart, just stay where you’re at. Where are you right now? What were you doing?” It was the Binnie that you knew and loved speaking right now, but it was so different from the Changbin that had sat across from you in the living room just a little while ago. Right now you couldn’t find it in yourself to care, you simply needed him there with you, his voice soft and sweet as he talked you through the pain. 

“Kitchen… I… I was hungry…” You stammered, and then you hiccuped, the sudden jolt seemingly shifting your stomach and causing you to retch. “S-Sorry…” You whispered, and you heard Changbin sigh softly, although you weren’t sure if it sounded that way because he pulled his phone away or if he was just trying to be quiet because he knew what was going on. 

“I’ll be home shortly, and then I’ll order us something to eat. You remember what we talked about the last time this happened and I wasn’t there? You remember what I told you to do?” He was trying his best to keep your mind off of the ache, and it was working in a way, your mind now trying to clear the fog to think about what you’d do if this happened while he was on tour. He’d sit on the phone with you for hours, and if he was in the middle of a show while it happened, he had set up his voicemail just for you so you could listen to his voice to help you a little bit until he could call you back. “Just listen to me talk and…-” 

“And take deep breaths…” You sputtered out, your breaths coming a little bit too quickly right now which wasn’t helping in the nausea department. “Count to ten…” You continued, squeezing your eyes shut as tightly as you could as you tried to visualize the numbers popping up in your head while listening to him talk. He wasn’t really talking about anything in particular, his voice was just something for you to focus on, something to calm you in a way. 

It wasn’t long… or maybe it was… until Changbin came walking through the front door. The entire apartment was pitch black, but he knew that flicking on any lights would only make things worse, so he used his phone screen to shine a light across the floor until he made it to the kitchen where you were still sitting curled up against the cabinets. “Did you take your medicine today?” He asked as he squatted down on the floor next to you, his hand wiping the beads of sweat from your forehead that you didn’t even notice had built up. 

Your medicine, which you often forgot to take, especially when you were in a hurry, had just now crossed your mind now that Changbin had brought it up. “No…” You mumbled sheepishly, and he tsked his tongue, but he wasn’t going to say anything about it right now. Instead, he helped you to your feet, but once you were on them, he gently lifted you up, carrying you to the bedroom and then carefully laying you down. 

“I don’t want you to take it now… You have to take it in the morning…” He whispered, and although the room was dark, you could tell he wasn’t looking at you because you couldn’t see the moon reflected in the whites of his eyes. “I’m sorry… For the way I acted. It was uncalled for, and I got jealous… Stupidly jealous. I just… I don’t like the idea of another guy taking care of you. It kind of pisses me off…” 

“Kind of?” You questioned, and you would have laughed if the situation didn’t feel so serious. “You walked out on me… That hurt, Binnie…” You softly explained as shortly as possible. “I’d like to think that I make it perfectly clear that I love you… Only you… You’re the only person I want to take care of me…” You reached out in the darkness, your hand brushing along his back where you could feel the outline of his muscles that you mapped with your fingertips. 

“You do… You do.” He repeated himself, running his hands over his face, and you felt him shiver slightly from your touch. “I know you love me… I know you feel that way… I just… I want to be the only person that takes care of you, the only person who looks out for you. Sometimes I feel like… Like since I’m gone so much… You’ll find someone else to take care of you like I should.” 

“Bin…” You sighed out his name, pushing yourself up onto your knees and draping your arms over his shoulders, burying your face in the crook of his neck and placing light kisses against his skin. “I don’t want anyone else to take care of me… You’re the only person that can calm me, that can soothe me. You’re the only one that can ever make me feel better. I don’t want anyone but you.” His silence let you know that he was thinking, and you didn’t want him thinking anything bad, so you pulled him to lay down, laying on top of him to trap him-although you knew he could move you if he wanted to-and pulling the blanket up around the both of you. 

“I’ll do better… I’ll be better…” He whispered, his fingers dancing along the small of your back. “I’m sorry I upset you… I’m so sorry, sweetheart…” He apologized again, placing a kiss to the top of your head before settling into his pillow again. “I’m not leaving again, I’ll stay right here with you, forever and ever.” 

Permanent Taglist : @whatudowhennooneseesyou @duchesskaren @mytherapisttoldmenotto @lovesunshinefelix @moon0fthenight @kurolils @maruskz @hello-2-u-from-me @mrswolfiechan @bunnychangbin @his-angell @if-spearb @yomomma104 @lanatheawesome @facelesswrittes

[dashofmonsters]

Dreamers & Delusions- Pt. 1

Male Merman x Female Reader

You didn't like the idea of moving to another state and having to have a new life, but you hated the idea of staying even more so. There was nothing left for you but misery and you were just so tired of it.

When you moved to the west coast to live with your grandmother things seemed different. For the first few months there you felt like you could finally breathe, but that was short lived. Little by little things started to get worse.

First your grandmother kept making little snide remarks about your lack of interest in you not wearing make up. Then your job at the local diner had you working double shifts on the weekend. Your ex blasts some stupid shit about your break up all over social media and two of your close friends ghost you. Oh and then you discover a beautiful little slice of beach.

The last one wouldn't be so bad you tell yourself, if it wasn't for the same old stalking creeps who bother you at work. The only bright side was the mean mugging merman lifeguard who was built like a fucking god and had the attitude to back it up. In short, he's an asshole. But you know the difference between the good, the bad, and I'm just doing my job assholes and he's a weird mix of all three.

At first going to the beach was like free therapy for you. You could relax and get away from your judgmental grandmother and the creepy customers from the diner, it was like heaven. But just like moving here, things got worse over time. Somehow your three stalkers found your slice of heaven. Somehow you couldn't get far enough away from them. Somehow the beach became another slice of hell.

So you decided to sit as close as possible to the lifeguard when you wanted to lounge or swim out as far as possible. And that seemed to work, until today.

"Come on, I'm just asking you to have dinner with me," Kevin hovers over you, his arms crossed like an indignant child.

"For the last time man she's obviously not interested in an asshat like you. She'd rather go for drinks with me," Martin chimes in, his overly tattooed body stinking of cheap cologne and lack of deodorant.

"You two are fucked if you think she's going with either of you. She needs a real man, someone who can take care of her," Sam pushes the two aside and kneels down next two you. "Ain't that right sugar?" The accent, nickname, and bad breath nearly combined has you retching.

That response unfortunately spurred an impromptu fist fight. Kevin and Martin started wailing on Sam and then Sam the fuckboy threw punches filled with sand and Martin got punch so hard he moaned which made Sam hit him below the belt and the-

"I SAID ENOUGH!"

The scene died immediately. The nearly seven or eight foot tall merman lifeguard prowled towards the three idiots and parted them like they were curtains. Sam was the first to flee followed by Martin and Kevin who kicked up a ton of sand as the skedaddled towards the parking lot.

Mr. Asshole lifeguard stares you down hard now, his yellow eyes burning into you.

"Why is it whenever you're on my beach those three headaches are sure to follow?" he asks, very very pissed off.

You've had a similar question come up at work whenever those three would cause a ruckus on your shifts.

You roll your eyes, "Unfortunately some guys don't understand the definition of the word 'No'."

"So that means they have to follow you around like a group of parasites trying to latch at fresh meat?" he asks.

His question throws you off so much and the image it implies makes you giggle.

He's a merman from another realm who's acclimating, I should cut him some slack.

"That uh isn't too far from the truth but in all honesty, they're trying to bother me so much that I eventually have to say yes just to get them to stop bothering me," you explain.

The lifeguard crosses his arms and looks to the ground in serious contemplation before looking back up to you.

"And is this normal courting behavior," he asks.

"Unfortunately it is for some, but it's bad and wrong. For me it's annoying and I get no peace. They bothered me at work and now they bother me here when all I want to do is relax," you sigh, feeling oddly relieved to have gotten this off your chest albeit in an educational way.

"I see," he nods. "So you are not attracted to those parasites?"

"Not. At. All." you nod back.

"Noted," he grimaces and turns to walk back to the guard tower.

"Hey wait! What's your name?" you call out.

"It's Tao," he says, stilling walking towards his destination.

You smile and shout your name back to him but instead of dismissing you like you thought he would he waves back before ascending up the tower.

So it's Mr. Tao, mean mugging asshole lifeguard and crusher of parasites.

~~~~~~~~~

Things seemed calm for the first few days after Tao broke up the fight between the creeps. They didn't pop up at the diner nor at the beach but you still kept close to the guard tower. Well as close as Tao allowed it. He gave you a strong lecture that you needed to sit at least seven feet away from the tower for safety reasons.

Your grandmother even relaxed on her remarks for a little bit but moved from makeup to your weight. Something about working with food adding some extra pounds. It was a new hurt, but you'd numb to it eventually.

Getting numb was your specialty at this point.

And somehow finding new ways to bother Tao, though that was more unintentional. At first it was the sitting too close to the tower, then it was swimming without suntan lotion even though it was cloudy. Then it was not having an umbrella for shade which he oddly enough provided one for you a day later along with a lecture and a half. It would have been super annoying to anyone else but you found it oddly cute.

He'd henpeck at some of the parents over their kids running amuck or scold some of the too rowdy teenagers but no one could say that this guy didn't take his job seriously. No one got hurt or even so much as sunburnt under his watch.

Until they came back.

You had worked a long ass shift Sunday and all you wanted was to go to the beach and lounge. It was a short walk from your grandmother's house and you always enjoyed tuning the world out on that little trek.

It wasn't sunny but it wasn't too cloudy either. It was the perfect day to take a nice beach nap, watch a couple episodes of your favorite cooking shows, and maybe bother your favorite lifeguard for a bit of suntan lotion that you seem to keep forgetting.

You saunter down to the beach and lay out your favorite tie dye towel and stretch. Scanning the scene you notice that it'll be a very very calm day, that is since it's a Monday after all.

As you're about to walk over to the guard tower a familiar and annoying voice stops you.

"Hey babe, it's been a while!"

Ughhh Sam.

You ignore him and keep heading towards the tower. You hear him run towards you so you pick up the pace but are dragged back as he catches your arm.

"It's fucking rude to ignore someone talking to you," Sam spins you around and holds you in place.

"Like you'd fucking listen you fucking parasite. How many times do I have to say no or I'm not interested for you to get it through your thick fucking skull you goddamn idiot!" you yell at him, hoping Tao will hear.

Sam shakes you before jerking you around, "A pretty thing like you shouldn't be talking like that, come on and be sweet."

You start kicking your legs and land squirming violently before headbutting Sam as hard as you can right into his nose. He curses but doesn't let go so you decide to go to bite his hand until you're suddenly being ripped out of his arms.

Thinking it might be Tao you turn to smile only to be assaulted with that nasty cheap cologne smell. You grimace and try to pull away from Martin only to get yanked away by Kevin.

To his credit, Kevin doesn't hold on tight and he actually turns his back to the others before they try to continue their game of tug-a-war with you.

Sam kicks Kevin in the shin but somehow Kevin is able to stand long enough to push you in the direction of the tower. Without saying anything he turns and decks Sam in the face. You're frozen in horror for a moment then turn to run to the tower only to be met with a brick wall called Tao.

"I see the parasites are back on my beach," he seethes before looking you over. He looks furious.

Before you have a chance to say anything he stomps over and grabs Sam by his neck and hoists him in the air. Kevin and Martin fall back on their asses before scrambling to get out of the way.

"When someone says no, they mean no. It is not an invitation to continue your inappropriate courting behavior," Tao tightens his grip around Sam's neck.

"F-fffuck you fish boy. I will get you fucki-ing deported for this! I saw er first," Sam grits as he flails about, face turning all sorts of shades of red.

Tao tosses him to the ground like a ragdoll and before Sam can catch his breath, Tao holds him down by just a foot alone. He kneels down till his knee is almost digging into Sam's throat and says something that makes that asshat still.

You feel your heart still when Tao turns to you and beckons you over. Taking little steps at a time as your feet feel like lead you come to a stop next to Tao and Sam.

Sam is pale as a piece of printer paper.

"Tell her," Tao snaps at Sam.

"I-I-I am sorry. I won't bother you here or at the diner again. I promise you'll never see me again," Sam stutters and shakes like a leaf in a hurricane.

"And?" Tao presses.

"I-I'm a lowly parasite unworthy of your time and presence," he cries.

Tao nods then looks to you, "Anything you want to add?"

You're taken back by the soft look on his hard face. His eyes look worried even though his expression is still pissy offy.

You shake your head and cross your arms to hold yourself.

Tao moves off of Sam and forces him up and threatens to call the cops if he ever shows his ugly face on his beach again. Sam quickly scampers away, tripping several times as he makes his way to the parking lot.

There's a strange numbing feeling building in your chest that is suddenly washed away when Tao gently touches your shoulder.

"Come on, let me go look over those wounds," he nods towards the tower.

All you can do is follow him silently, still shocked about what just happened. You're so used to just going with the flow, dealing with whatever life gives you and fighting when you can. You've never had anyone come to your rescue. Not once.

"I have something that will clean the cuts where they got you with their fingernails and some band-aids. Unfortunately there will still be some bruising from when they were tugging at you," he says, a tinge of regret in his voice.

He leads you to the steps of the tower an has you sit down while he climbs up and grabs his first aid kit. You silently let him fuss over you as you try your best not to cry. Even though it's his job it's the first time anyone has treated you with this much kindness in a long while.

"Thank you," you mutter, finding it hard to speak.

Tao sighs and rubs some more antiseptic ointment on your arm, "I had thought my last conversation with those three would have been the last. Those males really are thick in the skull... I'm sorry."

"Don't be, you still came to my rescue," you try and smile but a stupid tear slips down.

Tao stills his hand, "Did that hurt?"

You shake your head, "No no, just uh got some sand in my eye. I'm fine."

He glares at you but sighs, "Alright then. Try and stay out of trouble and for the love of the goddesses please tell me if those parasites bother you again, in fact tell me if anyone bothers you while on my beach."

"Why?" you ask, feeling a bit strange that he'd go that far for your safety.

"Why?" he repeats, almost not sure of himself. "Because I like peace and you come here bringing chaos, more so than the kids whose parents are stuck to their devices or the teens who shoulder fight in the ocean."

"You mean chicken?" you ask, trying not to laugh.

"Whatever it's called! You humans have a major lack of self preservation and it's a wonder you've lasted this long," Tao stands, sounding frustrated as hell.

You dust yourself off and stand up too, "Well it's a good thing you're here then Mr. lifeguard... Because if it wasn't for you-"

You cut yourself off when the realization finally dawns on you. If it wasn't for Tao, things could have gotten a lot worse, you could have been hurt or dragged off the beach.

"If you weren't here, I might have been hurt a lot worse than just some bruises and cuts," you finish.

"If I got to you sooner you wouldn't be hurt at all," he replies, his face riddled with guilt.

"Yes well, what happened happened but you still saved me so stop blaming yourself for something that was out of your control dammit, " you kick some sand in his direction making him roll his eyes.

"You are too forgiving and far too kind for your own good," he shakes his head.

Too forgiving? No, he did nothing wrong. Too kind, maybe. You always hated confrontation when you could avoid it so you just smiled through things and mustered on. What was the point in getting upset when anger never solved anything.

"You might be right about the kindness thing, but forgiving," you pause to laugh. "I wouldn't say I'm forgiving at all, probably more spiteful if anything."

Yeah that felt right but not in the correct way. If you were going to prove a point it was usually in the worst way possible.

"Noted," Tao raises a jet black brow. He has such an interesting look with his tan skin and white hair with black streaks on one side. It was like if a Hollywood action star and a kpop idol had a baby or something. He has black bands on his arms that start right after his shoulders and stop right above the elbow. His hair is slicked back most of the time but right now it's messed up from his one sided fight with Sam.

"So uh, I'm just going to go back over there and do what I was going to do and relax," you give him your most nervous goofy grin.

Tao, in his ever so Taoness just nods.

~~~~~

True to his word you never saw Sam at the diner again or Martin, but Kevin did come by ever so often. Kevin was less on the creep side now, apparently very very sorry for his behavior and how he made you feel uncomfortable.

It didn't excuse what he did even though he tipped extra now to make up for it whenever he did come in.

Your grandmother though started to get worse again. From your make up, to your weight, and now your resistance to wearing booty shorts to catch a man's eye.

"I'm not going to wear it and that's final. I told you time and time again I'm not comfortable wearing shit like that," you raise your arms and try to stomp off.

"You ungrateful bitch are you afraid of looking like a slut? There are models and actresses who wear this! Are you slut shaming them," your grandmother shouts at you as she practically walks on your heals.

"God no! I just don't want to wear! Can we just drop it please," you beg her.

"I'll drop it once you try it on and walk outside in it for awhile," she tosses the shorts at you and crosses her arms.

"FUCK. NO." you crumple them up and toss them back at her feet.

"You're supposed to humor me remember? That was part of our deal for you to live here," she crinkles her face and slaps your arms.

You crumple back a bit and bite your cheek as you curse yourself for ever agreeing to live with her.

"Not at the expense of my comfort. I'm not your fucking dress up doll," you say through your teeth.

"You're insufferable, fine we'll make a trade deal. Don't humor me, but you owe rent now. two hundred a month. I believe that's more than fair," she throws up her hands and kicks the shorts to the side.

"Fine, that's fine. I can do that much," you exhale in relief. "I gotta get ready for work ok?"

"Yes yes and... I'm sorry, you know I get hot real easy. It's why I'm alone. I just don't want you to be. I just want you to be happy and well," she sighs and picks up the shorts.

"I know," you respond, the numbness starting to set in at her very stereotypical response.

"I love you," she coos as she forces you into a hug.

You give her a limp hug so she won't have something else to bitch about and tell her you love her too.

She's always like this after you two fight, so loving, so caring like she used to be when you were a little kid. She's changed to much after granpop cheated on her. No one saw it coming, they had such a great relationship but that was just what they showed everyone. In private, they both ran hot and your granpop was no saint. He cheated since the dawn of their marriage, he just didn't get caught until ten years ago.

Ever since that happened you tried to keep yourself better guarded so you wouldn't have to hurt like your grandmother. Unfortunately you're a hopeless romantic with a record of getting your heart broken very easily. That's part of the reason for the drastic move.

~~~~~

"Fuck I hate these dead shifts," you groan as you clean your section for the third time this evening.

"Enjoy it while it lasts sweetheart. Once summer hits, you'll be begging for a dead shift," Denise says as she lounges against the door to the kitchen.

"I know, I barely survived the ass end of it," you roll your eyes.

Working here was a breeze to be honest, but working under Mikey the shift manager was hell. He loves playing Russian Roulette with shifts, especially close to holidays or birthdays. Jessica bitched him out so bad in front of everyone that if he scheduled her on her birthday or her son's birthday one more time she would burn this place to the ground.

Needless to say when your ex-wife raises hell to a full diner, you listen.

You've stuck onto her like glue ever since, you needed an angel here.

"Any plans after you cut out," she asks.

Oh yeah, you have plans. Change and skip your happy ass down to visit your favorite lifeguard. You can't help but smile at the thought.

"Mmm you do have plans," she grins back and wriggles her drawn on brows.

"It's not like that," you roll your eyes.

Yes Tao is attractive but you hardly know him. He's nice and predictable. Safe and just wants things to be at peace. He's someone you respect for that for sure, but you can't see yourself crushing over him. It would ruin the faint friendship you've slowly but surely built with him.

"It really isn't it. He's like you. The only other friend I have here and I don't need more than that right now," you explain.

She gives you a sad smile and nods, "I know baby girl, you're still resetting from all that bullshit."

Jessica is the only one who really knows your situation as you spilled your heart out to her a couple weeks ago after she took you out for drinks for your birthday. She held you and patted your head as you ugly cried for a solid hour.

"How about you, anything new and exciting," you quickly change the topic and Jessica beams.

"Oh you know, just a little date with Mr. Perfect," she grins.

"This will be date number five Jes, you're really serious about him aren't you," you tease.

She crosses her arms and tosses her hip a bit and smiles, "Listen, if you asked me a few years ago if I ever saw myself dating a wild fae with a beard that would make every biker in the states jealous then I'd say you're crazy. But here I am, about to go on my fifth date with my wild man and I'm as happy as a bee in a bouquet."

She goes over her past dates with you until Mikey interrupts saying that you both need to get back to work. His interference was cut short by Jessica poking him in the chest and lecturing him about how there's no reason for the diner to be fully staffed during a dead shift and got the both of you off hours early.

"There will come a day when neither of us have to come back to this shithole ran by assholes. Just assume that if I never return that I got swept off my feet to the fae wilds to have crazy hot wild fae sex everyday," she laughs as she shimmies into her leather jacket and lights a smoke away from you.

"And if I never return, assume that I magically saved up enough to start my own restaurant," you smile back.

That's been the big dream. A small tapas style restaurant that catered to humans and the fair folk. There are so few establishments opened that cater to their palettes and it's not fair. Food brings people together and you see it as a great way to mix the fair folk into your world. Problem is, you don't know a lot of fair folk aside from Tao.

Suddenly the lightbulb in your head goes off.

"That's it," you say under your breath before hugging Jessica goodbye and running towards the beach.

I can ask him what he likes to eat and start from there. This is doable! I just hope he doesn't mind playing a million questions.

~~~~~~~~~

"Hey Tao, are you up there?" you shout as you round the tower.

Without so much as a word Tao drops with a sandy thud.

"What did you forget now? It's too dark for sunscreen and too warm for a shawl. Water perhaps?" he guesses and turns to climb back up the tower but you quickly stop him.

"No no, none of that. I uh um... What do merfolk like to eat?" you ask.

"Why do you want to know? Is a male courting you or something?" he asks back.

"What? No no. It's just that one day I want to run a restaurant that serves food for the fair folk and you're the only one I know so...," you shrug to him and he blushes.

This big ass god like brick wall just blushed?

"Ah, I see," he clears his throat. "Well in that case I can create a detailed list of ingredients and dishes that suit a saltwater diet."

"That... That would actually be amazingly helpful. Wow... Thank you!" you grin but then remember that thing about courting.

"So what was that thing you meant when you asked if I was being courted?" you raise a brow.

Tao's eyes go wide and he has this nervous look on his face that you've never seen before. "It's uh, customary for the males of my kind to present a feast to a female they are courting. Usually a female has many suiters and picks whoever has the most impressive spread the privilege to continue courting her."

"Oh, that's interesting. I haven't heard much on mer culture and traditions so this is new to me. I'm sorry if the question made you uncomfortable," you apologize.

"No, no. It's just that no one has asked or even seemed a bit interested in my people's ways. They're just interested in me," Tao waves up and down to himself.

"Well if they were truly interested in you, they'd try to get to know you," you cross your arms, upset for him.

Tao nods and you can tell he's thinking really really hard about something until he shakes his head.

"How can you tell if someone is wanting to get to know you for reasons other than trying to get me to their... uh what is the human word for nest again," he snaps his fingers trying to think.

"Bed?" you ask.

"That's it, how would I know," he repeats.

"Hmm, that can be a tough one. Some people will really put in a lot of effort to make you think that they care when they just one a night of fun. Some will check in on you everyday till they finally get you into their bed and ditch you when they're done," you explain.

Tao looks disgusted, "And this too is normal behavior?"

"For the people who just want a good time and don't give a rats ass about someone's feeling, yes," you grimace.

"Is this from your personal experience or observation," he asks.

Tao's famous curveball question hits you right in the gut. You look away from him and hold yourself for a moment as the numbness builds.

"Yes," is all you manage to say.

"I am sorry. It seems my question was insensitive," he bows.

"It's fine, you're just curious. I'd rather help you not make the same mistakes that I had to. You're like the only other friend I have here," you admit.

Tao looks shocked when you say that, like you slapped him with a wet towel.

"You consider me a friend?" he finally asks after a long moment of silence.

Shifting a bit in the sand you bite your cheek and nod, "You're the only guy friend I have. I feel safe when I'm at the beach and you don't make me feel uncomfortable at all. I just... some things are hard for me to talk about ok?"

He nods and although his expression doesn't change much, there's a brightness in his eyes you've never seen.

"Is that ok? I mean if it's against your culture I understand it can be o-"

"No, it's alright. I just didn't think a human would want to be friends with me," he run his hand through his hair and stares at the ground.

"Well, I mean you do mean mug just about everyone you talk to but I know deep down you're probably just being on your guard and it's hard to be nice sometimes," you tell him.

"I see, so not being expressive keeps people away? Hmm what could remedy this without me having to give up my uh... mean mug," Tao cocks his head and crosses his arms.

"I'm not sure. Most people tend to like it when you're more welcoming and less upset looking all the time. Is your stoicism like some cultural thing?" you ask in turn. Turns out Tao is playing a million questions with you now.

"Yes. Typically we're only expressive with close friends, family, and our mates. They're the only ones who are supposed to see your true face," he replies.

"That actually sound reasonable and nice," you smile.

"Do humans not have something like that," he settles against the tower later, full into the conversation now.

"Yes and no. Some of us rely more on friends than family and vice versa. Some will rely on their mates alone if their family or friends aren't available. It can be all sorts of combinations really," you shrugs and lean against one of the pillars holding up the tower.

Tao looks up thoughtfully before his gaze settles out towards the ocean. There's a comfortable quiet between the two of you as the sun sets behind a cluster of grey clouds.

"Looks like rain," you comment.

"It's been smelling like a set of storms all week. Probably about to usher in some cold weather," Tao sniffs the air and sighs.

"Not a fan of the cold?" you shift in the sand and turn a little more towards Tao.

He shakes his head, "I grew up in a much warmer climate. If it ever got too cold we would sleep in our clusters or migrate. I can't do either here so I've just been adding more layers to my nest with every paycheck I get and buying the warmest clothes that fit me."

"I gotchya. I like some good mild weather myself. Not too hot or cold. By the way what will you do once winter hits? Beaches are usually closed once winter hits," you ask, realizing you might have to find another safe haven of sanity during that time.

"I'm not too sure, I haven't given it much thought," he admits. "At least I have a little time to consider a winter job so I don't have to hibernate."

"Yeah that would be... wait what?"

Part. 2>

[ohbo-ohno]

i hate typin long words sometimes its hard to rlly explain but bc of college too i just found it sm more easier to cut out certain vowels w words (it drives my friends insane sometimes esp when i send a message nd its so full of typos bc i thought itd b funny to turn off autocorrect ?? like no.. i am not gna type out certain words.. so used to it by now

on that note, reader ignoring the txts from ghoap bc shes upset at them nd it isn’t even abt getting kidnapping. like they did smth to upset her and they’re jumpin hoops tryin to figure out what they did 😭 can imagine johnny just being pouty bc they’re away at their job and whinin to ghost and ghost just “>:(“ bc how dare u ignore them..

i love it lol. i have like at least one spelling mistake in every message i send to someone, i end up getting texts from friends that are like "wtf did you just try and say" cause im too excited to send the fucking message to bother rereading. you're relatable as hell.

two ways you can go with this in my head

(a) you're mad at both of them, but you absolutely refuse to tell them why. it should be obvious and quite frankly in your mind it's worse that they don't even know. leaves them pulling their hair out. but this is your first argument as a couple that doesn't center around the whole kidnapping thing so they're trying to like actually work through it lmao. ends with johnny laying himself over you and whining while you just stick your nose in the air and cross your arms. simon tries to be all soft, thinks maybe if he's nice it'll tempt you to tell him. strokes up and down your side, nose in your hair, says a whole bunch of pretty words. you are not fooled lol. they get it out of you after a few rounds of frankly exhausting sex that night lol

(b) you're mad at just one of them. if you're mad at just johnny, simon gets sooooooo cocky. tugs you into his arms, mimics all the ways johnny usually touches you just to drive it home in johnny's head that he's not touching you. keeps you glued right to his lap and tells you you can tell me love, we can make sure he apologizes properly together. make sure mean johnny never hurts you again, hm? and johnny is a mix of pouting and pissed across the couch. if you're mad at just simon, johnny will join in with you. he'll throw an arm over your shoulder and just start making shit up lmao, start saying simon's done all this shit that he hasn't just because it's fun to team up with you on something. you're actually mad but johnny is mostly trying to goad ghost into really good sex. this has a very interesting result that night lol

[love-toxin]

my ass is craving for male! angel face who's in the basketball team and is flirty little shit who's a perv with a perv! bully! Eddie

teehee....flirty male angelface my love.....

pretty boy

(cws: bully!perv!eddie, flirty!jock!m!angelface, homophobia, "freak" used in the homophobic sense, violence/fighting, bruises, one shower trope [kinda], clothes stealing, bullying, eddie's got a staring problem, angel's kind of a charming loner.)

you're kind of an anomaly--you're pretty well-liked, and the girls just flock to you most of the time, but you don't really date or have many friends. of course, that just maximizes the intrigue for the ladies, but you're really not too worried about them....not that they or most people really know that. on the other hand, despite being one of the better basketball players in Hawkins, your team absolutely despises you. Sinclair's pretty much the only one who doesn't, he's a pretty cool kid and you've enjoyed giving him some pointers now and again, but Jason and the rest of them often like to throw names your way and do their best to keep you on the bench as much as possible. if you weren't the one getting them through most of the finals, you'd probably just quit, and the coach wouldn't be begging you to stay--you really only do it cause you like it, and it's a way to pass the time.

of course, the most pressing reason they hate you is cause you're different--you're a freak, and they make sure you remember that every time they force you to wait outside until they're all done showering and changing. and yet you're rarely ever really alone when you finally get off the bench with a sigh and walk in, the empty changing room squeaking to life when you flip on the shower to wash off. if it wasn't for Eddie, they'd probably never suspect you, and you could get through your second try of your last year in peace--you probably wouldn't be on your second try in the first place.

but you have to be honest with yourself. at the end of the day, you haven't really done much to keep him away. you like the attention, but you only really like it from him--including when you feel his eyes on your back as you rub soap down your arms. for all his chains and buttons and leather, the man moves like a damn panther when he doesn't want to be heard.

"if you wanna beat me up, take a number. I already got my ass kicked once today." you chuckle, knowing he's closer than you think if you can feel him staring so intensely, as you call out into the echoey locker room. "unless you're just here to steal my clothes, in which case you're gonna have to figure out my new locker combo. try your birthday, babe." you smile to yourself, knowing you're earning yourself a higher place on Eddie's shit list the more you tease him. although, to be frank, you're pretty much the only name on that list in the first place.

the silence creeps in closer, hanging in the background of the hail of warm water hitting your body and the cold tiles under your feet. there's not even an ounce of shuffling that you can hear, and it dampens your smile until you find yourself scowling at the silver shower handle in front of you.

"they asked about you, y'know." you say with a sobering voice, lathering your body wash in a rougher manner than you need to between your hands. "last time they beat me up. asked if I was gonna go suck you off after practice for your devil rituals."

people's opinions don't generally bother you, you try not to let them--it's one of the reasons why you're such a target, especially for Eddie, who's always trying to get a reaction out of you. he loves it when you show even an inkling of losing your cool, of snapping back at him, but he rarely gets the passionate response that he really wants. so he keeps pushing, pushing, pushing, until it takes all you have to grit your teeth and smile so you don't punch him right in that stupid, pretty face.

"....you know, you really don't make my life easy, you prick." you huff. "but by all means, take what you want. go show it off to your shitty little friends at satan worship club."

you can't imagine he does anything else with the things of yours he steals, other than pawn them off or keep them for whatever reason. you'd feel more violated if he didn't occasionally sneak them back into your locker or your backpack--always washed, which just makes you more concerned than angry.

".....Eddie?" you call out again, leaning back and searching the space you can see from where you stand, a twinge of panic shooting through you at the uncanny silence. if he was watching you, he'd usually make himself known at some point--and now you fear it might not be him, and goosebumps rise to your skin at the thought that some of your team members are waiting in the wings to dish out more humiliating punishment. and if they've been listening to what you've said when you thought you were talking to Eddie, you really fear for yourself. but just as you're reaching to turn the handle and shut off the water, a sudden thud makes you jump and then there's someone standing in the doorway between the shower block and the locker room.

that messy mop of hair gives it away immediately, a towel wrapped round his waist that comes off as he approaches the showerhead right next to yours and turns it on. you catch Eddie's grin from your peripheral as you go from gawking openly at him showing up to averting your eyes when he strips himself bare, so used to avoiding even the appearance of impropriety around other guys that it's just habit--even though Eddie's staring pretty obviously when you manage to look him in the eyes. the wash of water pouring over his head mats down his curls and accentuates the distinct features of his face, as well as the ink contrasting his fair skin that seems to crop up everywhere you dare to look.

"devil rituals, huh? clever." his smile doesn't reach his eyes, those big, brown beauties betraying something that chills you a little when they're directed at you. he goes about washing himself off, but he's clearly distracted--and so are you, rendered speechless even when he steals a bit of your body wash and rubs it down his chest, staring off into the distance as you try to focus on doing the same. it's strange. oddly domestic, showering next to each other.....and Eddie keeps glancing back in the direction of the door, seemingly keeping his ears perked for any sounds outside the norm. "....that where the bruises came from?"

he asks it so casually you almost do a double take, but thinking better of it, you keep yourself fixed on one of the random floor tiles as the answer just dribbles out of you.

"getting 'beat up'....that was a little dramatic. they just kinda....throw me around. can't break their star player's arm, y'know." you laugh without a shred of humour behind it, running through the events of this morning behind the school like they just happened. it's always just a little scuffle, some pushing and shoving and sometimes a punch thrown, it's mostly the jeers that hurt--and you know better than to fight back, lest they flex that power they have to make sure nobody believes you over them. you're associated with Eddie Munson, after all.

you rub over one of the bruises on your ribs, hissing sharply but quietly at the ache as your fingers graze it. doesn't help that your teammates, save Sinclair, thoroughly enjoy elbowing you or tossing the ball hard enough that those spots hurt even more during practice. and Eddie notices, as he always does, even though you'd never think he would.

"let's get one thing straight," Eddie turns his gaze to yours, and pierces you straight to the bone. it's weird, you don't really get close to a lot of people, but Eddie always seems to be able to read you like nobody else could. "it's no fun to dogpile someone that's already on the ground. it's just depressing."

he flicks his wet hair over his shoulder, and you follow the motion it makes as it drapes over his shoulder and down his back. he's not really that hairy, aside from the smattering of hair down his stomach that leads to--you shake your head free of where you're tempted to look, though the thought doesn't wrestle free from your mind and won't for a while. without a reply, Eddie rinses the rest of the soap off that he's lathered around that area, and thinks hard before he speaks again.

"where's the fun in pushing you around if you're just going through the motions? besides, you look so pathetic when you're lonely." lonely. does he really think that way? does he know how often you lay awake in the mornings, knowing what's coming in the day ahead, and wishing you weren't so much of a freak that you could have some friends to rely on when things get too hard to deal with?

"so you're keeping me company?" you test, sharing another look that he keeps locked so you don't even think you could break it if you tried.

"nothing of the sort." he smirks as he takes stock of your body one more time, from the toes to the top of your head. "I'm just enjoying the view."

with that, he shuts off his own shower, and pads away without a second glance to leave you watching his back, up until he turns the corner to the lockers and disappears. with a bit of shuffling and shifting clothes, you listen closely until his shoes thump against the floor and the door opens, before slowly creaking shut with a final thunk.

"so you are a freak." you speak aloud to nobody but yourself, a chuckle coming off your lips borne of nothing but disbelief. you just have to roll your eyes as you turn the handle on your own shower, but there's a grin you can't hide creeping across your lips as the spout sputters to an end and you wrap your towel round your hips, before following where Eddie had gone and approaching the lockers around the corner. but when you see what he left for you, you grimace.

"oh, you asshole."

your locker door left open and empty, your bag sits clearly rummaged through on the bench, one of your socks having fallen to the floor while the rest of your clothes are missing. and when you pull it open all the way to see if there's anything to salvage your dignity other than a measly towel, you're met with a very familiar logo as you lean over it.

sitting crumpled and half-folded, but very clearly smoothed out so you wouldn't miss it, is Eddie's Hellfire shirt. pushing it aside, you see the jeans he must've been wearing today rolled up underneath. no underwear to speak of, although you're not sure you'd wanna wear his anyways. with everyone else gone, you have no other options--so you're forced to don the sweaty clothes that reek of cigarettes and weed, but even moreso, they reek of Eddie. part of you wonders, as you huff and gather your things together to beat a hasty retreat out of the school, whether people will notice that Eddie's wearing your clothes too. maybe they'll wonder....

whatever. you need to get out of here, and you sling your bag over your shoulder before hurrying out the door and shoving your hands in pockets that aren't yours, tilting your head down and hoping nobody spots you--but just as you're at the doors that lead out to your car, you hear someone's voice down the semi-empty hall; what sounds like a very familiar freshman squabbling with someone.

"Eddie, what the hell?! if you're gonna make me cover for you, at least come back on time! and where's your shirt? why's your hair wet?"

"nunya, Henderson. let's get going."

and when you turn to look, there's Eddie, looming over his protégé with that same award-winning smile--the two of them turn to walk down the hall towards their clubroom, but before they duck in through the door, Eddie turns his head over his shoulder to lock eyes with you, completely knowingly. he runs his stare over your body one more time, clearly enjoying how you fill out his clothes as he mouths the words "pretty boy", and winks in your direction before vanishing through the doorway and closing it behind him.

he's one to talk, he's really one to talk--looking so much softer in your sweater and acid-wash jeans, so cute, that you have to cover the flickering smile you've got at the compliment with your hand as you step out into the chilly air, and feel your still-damp skin prickle as the breeze hits it while you walk to your car.

[tobiasdrake]

Now that we have our new party member, it's time for another story time with Teaks.

This is the big one.

Okay what the fuck is this and why did my Captain's Quarters get wasted on it.

I would have been more than happy to let Hortence have the Captain's Quarters since she's been here the longest and has the most claim to this ship, crime notwithstanding.

I could deal with the fictional Captain Cliche having the Captain's Quarters despite Serai not even bothering to use that guise while she's here, thus resulting in an empty bedchamber.

But why does the new blood get it? I don't care if you're basically God, you fucking work your way up the ladder like the rest of us! >_< I'm so furious right now.

And yet you gave him the Captain's Quarters.

I mean. Okay, in fairness, Teaks did that. I don't know why she has the authority to do that, though.

No. I want to throttle you with my bare hands.

However, much like Garl, it is impossible for me to physically be angry with you for any length of time. So I just have all of this aggression and nowhere to put it. I just... I JUST FUCKING....

._. Will you please make me a sandwich I can drown my fury in, thank you very much.

Yes, the usual.

*sigh* Okay, Teaks. Now I want to hear a story. It's finally time to find out exactly who the Archivist/TIA and the Fleshmancer are.

Huh. I figured TIA was some kind of ungodly horror beneath those robes, but apparently he's just zombie-faced. Mm, I feel bad about telling him to go take a shower now. It would not help.

You guys should sit down and chat with Roro. She owns it. Has a whole undead style of her own.

Hold up, he's jealous of our ephemerality? He hates us 'cause we die? That's it? It's not, like, he hates us 'cause we're pretty or he longs to taste good food and not have to dress in rags or something? He's just pissy because he wants to be able to die too?

My dude, you don't have to unleash apocalyptic horrors upon mankind in order to fulfill that desire. If all you want is to be ephemeral, come hang out with me and Zale and we'll work on that. I'd be more than happy to experiment.

Ohhh, I get it. He doesn't have a heart anymore 'cause he used it for his experiments.

He's Disney evil.

You know, I thought you were going to tell me that Resh'an was responsible for Solstice magic but apparently it's just. Like. A thing that happened to also exist, and that trumps the Fleshmancer's stuff... because?

I may have to reassess my comprehension of the Fleshmancer and TIA. The Archivist's opening explanation of the lore made me think these guys were, like... primeval forces of good and evil or something, wreaking vast influence across some enormous multiverse.

Like. I figured they had terrestrial origins in some world somewhere. They had the vibe of ancient wizards who came from meager origins and ascended into godhood. In that regard, I suppose I had them pegged right.

But that seemed like a "Long time ago in a universe far, far away" type of origin, where they've been these ancient supreme beings of good and evil ever since. But Teaks is making this sound a lot more local.

They're just two more guys who accidentallied themselves into a horrifying curse. TIA has nothing to do with the source of Solstice magic. He doesn't even know what it is, really; Just that whatever we are, it sure does kick the shit out of whatever Aephorul's become.

He didn't create us; He found us and went "HOLY FUCK That's powerful! Let's use it!"

I've been shittalking him out of irreverence but. Like. Now, I think that we might be higher on the Hierarchy of WTF than TIA and the Fleshmancer are. Even if TIA is still, admittedly, higher on the Hierarchy of Knowing What The Fuck You're On About.

So if he founded the Solstice Warriors, does that mean TIA is the Great Eagle? Is he the guy I need to beat the shit out of for the unsettling horror of Mooncradle?

Because I can't do it until he tells us how to get onto Mesa Island. But I do want my Captain's Quarters back....

Or a longer window of Whenever We Goddamn Want if you have this fancy amulet. Which was just sitting abandoned in an ice block for how many decades/centuries?

Hey Resh'an? I don't want to tell you how to be the Immortal Alchemist but if you were that concerned with Solstice Warriors defeating Dwellers and you knew where this thing was all along, uh... what the hell, man?

When exactly did we lose track of this thing? Because absolutely none of the ancient Solstice lore I learned from Moraine suggests that it even exists somewhere to be found. We've been using these fancy time runes for day/night manipulation on a small scale while biding our time to strike at Dwellers on eclipse nights. Meanwhile our founder has had coordinates for Pocket Eclipse in his back pocket this whole time. I'm kind of angry about that.

Yeah, that's part of what had me thinking this was some kind of multiversal conflict. Obviously World Eaters must have, like... eaten some worlds in order to be a known thing, right? I assume we know about them from Resh'an; If he was our founder then our lore would be passed down from him. Though he didn't see fit to tell us about Pocket Eclipse so who knows?

Or maybe he did, and Moraine just didn't bother to tell me because I was kind of a shitty student.

Or maybe Moraine did tell me and I just wasn't paying attention. I was kind of a shitty student.

Hm.

In any case, to be known as World Eaters, one imagines they've eaten some worlds. And that this isn't one that they've eaten yet. So these guys can't be a purely terrestrial phenomenon, right?

Oh, so it's both. They are a terrestrial phenomenon but Resh'an created a multiverse through a grandiose gesture of magic.

That's...

That's kind of promising? Like. Metaphysically, that could mean that if circumstances conspire in such a way that we kill Aephorul in any one timeline or reality, fucker will be dead in all timelines and realities because there's only one of him.

This isn't an independent multiverse that Aephorul's invading and attacking. It's a multiverse of attempts to resist Aephorul. We only have to win once. Statistics are on our side.

Even if there's only 1 in 1000 chance of someone defeating Aephorul, if you roll 10,000 dice....

That's why he let us into his library even though we are clearly not the Chosen Ones. It's what he was trying to figure out at the start. We're a dice toss. ^_^

But that's also why he's being so KEEP ME OUT OF IT with regard to Aephorul. Because the same logic applies to him. Aephorul only has to kill him once. In a cosmic sense, we're all expendable compared to him, because there's millions of other versions of us. He can always go back to the drawing board and try something else. Maybe a different version of us, or maybe someone else who might actually be the Chosen Ones. But if anything happens to him, that's game over.

This makes way more sense when Teaks explains it than when TIA tried to. Probably because she's giving me the full story while he's a cryptic bastard. Resh'an is stuck navigating causality to try and find a chain of events that will lead to success against the impossible.

If the dude's so pissy about not being ephemeral, you'd think the sameyness of those realities might bother him a little. Wouldn't you eventually get bored conquering the same world over and over and over again?

These two are playing very different video games.

And that's what Resh'an was on about when he was like, "You don't understand; If Aephorul finds out that I'm here, he'll return."

It's not because he's hiding out from Aephorul. It's because he's violating the terms of the agreement. Resh'an is cheating right now, in a way that would give Aephorul tacit permission to do the same if caught.

Teaks, from now on, can we make this a rule? Can people tell you the lore dumps and then you can explain them to me? You're so good at this.

So now I'm starting to get more of an understanding of what Guardian Gods are too. Like, we knew it was the evolution of Solstice Warriors into some kind of deity. But, specifically, it's our counterpart to World Eaters; Guardian Gods because the pair become a force of Solstice magic that Aephorul can't pierce, on account of our magic being higher on the Hierarchy of WTF.

Uh, probably when he wins, I would say. No sense in doing it while Aephorul's still out there, right?

I adore you, Teaks, but sometimes you ask dumb questions.

[for-the-ninth]

It happens like clockwork every election cycle.

Republican gets elected, people rage and foist all the blame onto third party voters or people who didn't vote. They post their hot takes about the brain dead red states who vote against their own interests and claim the only reason any of us are in this mess at all is because people won't "do the work," when their own definition of "the work" really just comes down to voting Democrat every four years, encouraging others to do the same, and resorting to shame when some of them inevitably don't.

These are often, though not always, folks who don't really know what The Work is. They aren't grounded in the struggle. They are comfortable enough that the only thing that really fazes them is someone like Trump getting elected. They aren't participating in community outreach or mutual aid networks. They are comfortable in many ways they probably take for granted, and the reason they want Dems in office is, in part, to protect that comfort.

What they don't realize, and often refuse to realize no matter how many activists of the present and past tell them, is that liberalism and electoral politics was never going to save us. Democrats have long been committed to the status quo. They cosplay as revolutionaries and leaders of the resistance whenever the next Republican dickhead gets voted in. They co-opt the movement despite having no real stake in it, because they are centrists with no genuine desire to propel the country in a radically progressive direction. And when folks too far left of center step up to the plate, like Bernie Sanders, the rest of the party refuses to put their weight behind them.

It's the same sorry set of excuses every time: oh, but we'll lose the swing voters! and we have to try to win over moderate Republicans! the nation isn't ready for someone so radical! When we all know that's bullshit. Anyone who's tired of crying over their grocery bill - and that's damn near everyone - is ready for radical change.

But sure, let's continue blaming people who didn't vote or voted third party for the result of one of many election cycles during which the Dems failed to provide us with a compelling progressive candidate with policies geared toward uplifting the working class and working poor.

By all means, let's continue doing the work of the imperialists for them, cause the more time we spend fighting each other over minor ideological differences (and yes, if your only beef with someone's ideology is that they didn't bother voting, that is a minor difference and not something worth seething over) the less time we'll spend organizing. The more isolated from each other we'll be. If we blame each other then we're less likely to blame them, for putting all of us in this hellscape.

And make no mistake - they know that. There's a reason Democratic politicians are so quick to disparage working class folks in southern states. If we blame them for just being sooooo willfully stupid and deplorable AND we blame everyone else for having the audacity not to vOTe bLue No MaTtRr wHo then there's no blame left to hurl at the Dems. They want so badly for us to believe that people like Obama, Harris, and Biden - who are all centrists, through and through - will save us if enough of us vote for them. And then when they do get voted in there's a million excuses for why they can't push any meaningful legislation through.

I hate watching so many of you buy right into it. Crucifying each other over not voting for the lesser of two evils like it isn't deeply fucked up that they're our only two options to begin with. Touting Harris like she's some sort of saint by comparison when she stood up on a national platform to say she wanted our military to be the most lethal in the world. Amidst calls for a ceasefire and an arms embargo, she said that shit with her whole chest, and y'all think Donald Trump is the only fascist? Get. A. Grip.

Electoral politics are not going to save us. Kamala Harris was never going to save us. We are the only people who can save us and we do that by building a grassroots movement grounded in class solidarity.

If you're still blaming people who voted third party or didn't vote at all, you're not ready for that movement. If you're still denigrating working class voters in red states for falling victim to the propaganda machine because you're Oh So Smart and that could never be you, you're not ready for the movement.

And if the only "work" you do is urging people to vote every 4 years and writing spicy posts after the fact about how you no longer give a shit about the people who "betrayed" you by not relying on electoral politics to save us - many of whom I can promise you are doing real, tangible work to benefit the people in their own communities - do me and everyone else a favor, and get grounded. Get rooted in the struggle. Stop spewing reactionary nonsense and put that energy into your community - including people who didn't fucking vote for Harris. Cause I can promise you, organizers and activists aren't checking anyone's voting record when they serve up meals at the soup kitchen or fund mutual aid requests for rent money. Folks who are "actually doing the work" don't have time for that petty shit.

[petefromarma]

thank you this is a safe space for communist fall out boy fans. i love em but hate them and thats okay. i do wish they were better. i think one reason why people act like that in the fandom is they spent a lot of time associating with it and spending money and making it part of their identity which i am guilty of and still do, its almost an attack on them. to rethink what they consume. i think a lot of people just dont want to ever think of letting them go. and i get it it can suck. ofc i am not saying people should let go of them entirely or whatever but realize your faves may not be as progressive as you think they are and to acknowledge that flaw. i think one thing that sort of helped me “grow apart” from fall out boy is deadass making ocs. sure they don’t have a whole fandom or actual media but its honestly helped me a lot with just being able to put in my creative energy into something else besides fob. i still like to dabble in the fob fandom but its nice to have something else beyond fall out boy and sort of a “safety net” if things truly go south if fob gets actually “canceled” if they do something that i truly can’t really be all fandomy over if that makes sense hahaha

i think you're probably right tbh re fans feeling guilty abt spending money on them; a fair amount of western activism revolves around consumerism, which makes sense for a capitalistic society but like i really do wish these people would just get real and own up to the fact that their enjoyment of fob has nothing to do with their politics for better or for worse and if they actually believed that it did they would stop spending money on concert tickets and stop spending money on merch, not as a form of boycott or anything like that (imo most forms of western modern day boycott are ineffective in terms of constituting material change bc they focus on conglomerates; we should boycott bc it is the right thing to do to not pay in to companies that are supporting genocide, not bc we are expecting large scale change to come of it) but because it would be in line with the ideological/moral boundaries they have set for themselves

imo engaging with art/celebrity in a capitalistic society is a net neutral, for the most part; simply saying this among the most radical of accelerationist twitter grifters would get my head chopped off for paying attention to a band instead of the glorious revolution that's supposedly forming amongst russian soldiers doing genocide in the donbas or whatever but unless leftists want to actually get serious about global suffrage then idk what to say lol people are going to look to art as a coping mechanism and continue to pay in to these systems bc it helps them survive mentally/emotionally. now that being said that's why i think it's hypocritical and grotesque to participate in faux outrage against a band that you like by doing pretend activism bc none of these people actually give a shit that fob do business with/are friends with zionists, they just want to look good in front of their friends for caring about the right thing at the right time. if their disgust was genuine they would quietly drop them and move on but they're more invested in their own comfort than doing what they perceive as being right. so i guess to clarify i don't think spending money on and paying attention to a band with milquetoast lib politics is inherently materially harmful; what i do believe is actively harmful to the cause you claim to serve is when you put on a performance for a few days because the band you like fucked up in a way that can't be ignored and then never talk about it again and go back to pretending that pw is a radical leftist and not a run of the mill democrat. like if you're just going to stop talking about it eventually don't even bother bringing it up in the first place lol

i support you tho i do think OCs are a good idea esp if you want to pull away from engaging with IP tbh and i think just a good thing for enhancing your writing/creativity in general

[koumeowkami]

🪐 no celestial ; kanallen

— chapter four

"Kanata was a poor little angel that heaven couldn't help. He'd always been a tough one, not trusting anyone but his little brother Nayuta, the only person that ever made him feel love. Growing up by themselves, he did everything in his power to protect his sick brother, things that dirtied his holy hands. "It's for a good cause though", he thought. But it wasn't enough, and Nayuta died soon after.

Kanata's soul was completely spent. He became unable to feel love, and adding to his dirty dealings that soon were found out, he got cast out of heaven. Fallen on Earth with his wings blackened, he felt so lost and empty he thought he could've just died.

But a random encounter with a very annoying, persistent, stupid redhead human boy would've made him discover love again."

2389 words

genre: supernatural, hurt/comfort, angst

warnings: none

previous ✧ next

"...And who the fuck are these people now?"

Kanata's head was spinning. Having to deal with that Suzaku bastard was already plenty enough, he definitely didn't need other nosy people to bother the fuck out of him. He wondered if all humans were like that, unable to mind their own business; at least now he knew why he hated them so much.

"Yeah, um..." the guy stuttered again, probably because Kanata was looking at him as if he was ready to kill, "they're my roommates. I didn't know they were there either, to be honest..."

"I'm sorry, Allen! We were worried about you..." the pink-haired one spoke, joining their hands together, "It looked like you constantly had something on your mind and it was annoying to see" the mushroom-head continued, eyeing Kanata weirdly. He didn't know why and it was getting on his nerves.

"So... do you want to take this stray kitten home? Honestly, I don't want him to get my house dirty."

So he was of those filthy rich guys, huh.

Although he was used to being treated like that, it had always made Kanata's blood boil. Those people represented everything he hated the most: they ruined his and Nayuta's life, never helped them when they needed it despite having all the means to do that; they just watched the twins suffer and pretended they didn't exist. Of fucking course everyone would've been like that on Earth, too. He didn't even know why he was expecting something to begin with.

"Are you pickin' a fight with me!?" he snarled. If that guy thought Kanata was scared of him, he was so damn wrong. He started inching towards him.

"Oh, do you maybe prefer being called a rat?" Mushroom-head provoked him, "Sorry, but I don't take part in such vulgarities. You better do that with people of your kind". He smiled. God, he really wanted to beat the shit out of him.

"HAH!?"

"Hajun, stop being an asshole, will you?" Pink Hair intervened, then turned to Suzaku, "Allen, did you guys meet here?"

"Uh... yeah, a week ago" he scratched the back of his neck, "he has no other place to go, so I was trying to help him. I can feel he's not a bad guy... so guys, please."

The redhead looked at his friends with big puppy eyes, begging them. Kanata couldn't stand that look. He just hated being pitied like that, but something deep inside of him didn't want to stop him anymore. He could've done anything to drive that annoying little bastard away. He could've shown his black wings, could've proven he was an angel in order to scare him, but would've that been enough? Fighting again and again would probably only be a waste of time and energy. But was it really the only reason he was about to admit defeat? Kanata honestly didn't know anymore; his thoughts just turned into a mess whenever he was around that kid. The flames of his soul were desperately trying to burn the ice around Kanata's heart.

"...Are you gonna stop botherin' me if I agree to this?" he started, making Suzaku turn around, "Will you finally leave me alone? I'm so sick of you stickin' to me like that."

"Sure! I told you, the apartment is big" he smiled, "you won't be bothered. We'll make one step at a time."

"Stop actin' like we're gonna become besties or somethin' like that, it makes me gag" Kanata looked away. He feared that if the redhead kept shining just a bit more, he would've turned him into dust. So annoying.

"It seems we agree on something, at least" Mushroom-head spoke again. "If Allen is so desperate about taking the stray kitten home, then I guess I can't say no?" he huffed, "However, I can kick him out whenever I want to if he messes up. It's still my house, after all."

"Come on, Hajun... he doesn't look like the kind of guy who causes problems" Pink Hair said, turning their gaze on Kanata, "Allen is naive, but not enough to let weird people into his own house!"

"Hey, stop treating me like a kid!" Suzaku pouted, again. He looked so damn punchable. "Then that settles it! Thank you guys, I love you!" he hugged the other two so strongly they were gasping for air, then went towards Kanata.

"Don't even think of huggin' me! Who do you think you are!?" Kanata was panicking. He hadn't been close to another being in ages and got so unused to it he didn't know how he was supposed to take it anymore. Fine by him, human interactions never really mattered to him as long as they weren't with his brother, but this somehow got him more nervous than it should have.

"Ah, sorry... I promised not to bother you, didn't I?" the redhead smiled shyly, "I'm pretty sure someday I'll be able to hug you, though!"

"Yeah yeah, sure. Your friends are leavin' us behind, by the way." he pointed towards the park's entrance and started running in that same direction. He could hear a muffled "Oi, wait for me! " from behind him but he didn't look back.

Why the fuck was he even blushing for?

— ☾ —

Kanata couldn't believe his eyes. That apartment was huge, in a massive skyscraper. He had never seen something like that before, being used to the small ruined buildings of the slums back in the Celestial Kingdom; many people there, including the twins, didn't even have a home in the first place. He had missed that warmth.

"If only Nayuta could feel this, too..." he thought. He felt horrible knowing he couldn't share it with his brother, guilty that he had originally planned to rot somewhere in the streets to reach him, since he had nothing to lose anymore. He was still alone, after all; living in the same space of those humans didn't mean anything to him.

"I'm sorry, Nayuta..." he muttered, his voice so quiet no one even heard him. Then, a huge smile in front of him pulled him out of his thoughts.

"We're finally here! Make yourself at home, yeah?"

Mushroom-head interrupted him, "Before making himself at home, I'd like him to take a shower. He stinks" he said while walking to what seemed to be the kitchen, "I'll make dinner in the meantime."

"I don't have other clothes, though..." Kanata said in a small voice. He didn't like how things were turning, as he already knew that the answer would've been -

"Oh, no worries about it! Allen is gonna lend you some!" Pink Hair cheerfully replied with a smile.

"Why me!?"

"Why him!?"

The redhead and Kanata screamed at the same time, the former astounded and the latter clearly pissed. Yeah, things were definitely turning worse than he expected.

"You dummy, Hajun's clothes would be too big on him so you're the only option left." they turned to Suzaku, then glanced at the poor boy, "That is, if he doesn't want to wear some frilly dresses~? He'd be so cute in them, like a little doll-"

"No fucking way!" Kanata was so embarrassed he thought his cheeks were about to explode from how much they were hot. Why the fuck did they enjoy playing with him so much?

"Then it's decided! The bathroom is over there" Pink Hair pointed to a door in the corridor, "See you later~" they said before disappearing in their room.

Suzaku then turned to Kanata, a bit embarrassed himself, "Well, then... I'm gonna bring you some clothes later" he smiled softly. He was blushing a tiny bit, Kanata noticed it immediately. He suddenly got that weird feeling in his chest, the same one he had after meeting the redhead for the first time. And once again, he did his best to ignore it.

"Yeah, um... thanks" he said looking at the floor, "By the way, if you even dare to peep in while I'm showerin', I'll kill you" he went back to his intimidating gaze.

"Whoa, uh... believe me I won't!" the redhead gulped before dashing towards his room. Kanata didn't know if it was because he successfully got scared or he was simply embarrassed. Maybe both.

— ☾ —

"Hey, you don't look bad dressed like that!"

Kanata appeared in the kitchen wearing some black sweatpants and a grey hoodie. Those would look just right on Suzaku, but that bastard was at least 15 centimeters taller than him; this resulted into him looking tiny as hell and he hated it.

"Yeah, you look cute! I mean, my clothes still look a bit big on you but-"

"Stop lookin' at me! I ain't cute at all!" he screeched, stomping towards the nearest chair and sitting. That was the reason why he hated being small. He definitely was not cute, and he felt like dying even more when the redhead said it. For the second fucking time, even.

"Exactly. Now can you all sit, please? Let's have dinner before it gets cold." Mushroom-head sat at the table, showing some food Kanata had never seen before. Not that he used to eat a lot when he was in Heaven, but he had no idea how human food was supposed to taste or look like.

"...The hell is this?" he questioned, while he let the food sit on his tongue, "Never seen this kinda stuff before."

"Please don't talk while you're eating, it's gross" the other guy sighed, "It's samgyeopsal, a Korean dish. I'm Korean, so I cook these traditional dishes often."

"Oh, I just realized I didn't introduce you guys to each other!" the redhead suddenly raised his head from the plate, "Kanata, these are Hajun and Anne", he pointed first towards Mushroom-head, then towards Pink Hair.

Kanata didn't reply. He could care less about their names. Hell, he didn't even bother to call Suzaku by his actual name. They weren't close and surely will never be, so that didn't matter, right?

"Well, Kanata doesn't seem to be the talkative type, does he?" Anne looked at him a little concerned, "He must be really tired. Honestly, I can't wait to go to sleep, too~"

"Yeah, we should hurry up. I'm also kinda sleepy..." Suzaku yawned, rubbing his eyes.

"Uh... where am I supposed to sleep, anyway?" Kanata intervened, at this point craving to be finally left alone and have some time for himself.

The redhead nervously laughed, "Ah... well, about that..."

"You told me I got to have personal space! Do you call sharing a room «to have personal space»!?"

Kanata wasn't mad. He was absolutely fuming, mentally regretting ever saying yes to that dumbass. This was probably one of the most disastrous things that could've happened to him: he already couldn't manage to sleep alone anymore, but having a stranger in the same bed as him sounded even worse. He couldn't believe how the redhead had accepted this thing right away, as if it were normal; he really was way too naive and it irritated him so damn much.

"I'm sorry, okay! I worded it a bit wrong." Suzaku took a step back from him, who looked like he was gonna jump on him at any second. "The apartment is big and you can go wander anywhere you want to, but we only have three bedrooms! And I'm definitely not letting you sleep on the couch." he concluded, looking dead serious for once.

Honestly, Kanata didn't mind sleeping anywhere, as long as he had at least a roof on top of his head. But he got to the conclusion that arguing about this wouldn't have led nowhere, since that guy didn't seem to budge.

"So here's what we're gonna do! I got my sleeping bag here" he proudly showed that weird puffy bag to Kanata, "I'm gonna sleep on the floor with this, while you can use my bed. Sounds good?"

He really couldn't believe what he was hearing. Was he really that determined to stay in his room and still give him some space? To a random kid met in the park, who could've seemed suspicious in any possible way?

What the hell was wrong with this dude.

"Alright..." that was all he could say, a bit taken aback but mostly too tired to think about anything else to say. So he swiftly got on the soft bed covered in red sheets and turned on the opposite side, facing the door. He heard a faint "Good night" but didn't reply. The room fell silent.

He knew he wouldn't have slept as always, but at least he finally got to close his eyes for a while. There was the tiniest bit of comfort in that.

And then, it came back.

The image of his dear brother passing away with a smile on his face, cursing him forever, making him remember that the only thing he ever loved in this shitty world disappeared. The voices would tell him it was his fault. It was his fault he wasn't a good boy and their mommy didn't love them. It was his fault he wasn't a good brother, who couldn't even protect his precious little treasure. It was his fault he was left alone and deserved it.

He didn't even realize he ended up crying in his sleep, calling Nayuta's name.

"Nayuta... miss you..."

Allen was almost falling asleep when he heard some sniffling from over the bed. Slowly and cautiously, he got up and got closer to Kanata, who was talking in his sleep. He couldn't quite register what he was saying, though.

"He must be having a nightmare..." he thought, noticing the kid was shivering while slightly holding out his hand, as if he was trying to reach out to someone. Before he could even process what he wanted to do, he took his hand, but luckily Kanata didn't wake up. Instead, he gradually stopped crying, until he turned into quiet snores.

Allen smiled, hidden by the darkness of his room. He slightly got up from the bed, but the boy's grip on his hand was so strong he just couldn't go anywhere without waking him up. So he just stayed there, laying down a bit far from Kanata not to bother him.

"How am I gonna explain this to him tomorrow?" he asked himself, falling asleep.

[offsidekineticist]

❛ i don’t think i’ve ever seen you smile. ❜ for anyone :3

Hey Arrow! Gonna take a peek into the timeline where Theoven never leaves Cheliax for this one, so we can take a look inside Giliys's messed up little brain before the two get together.

Prompt from this post.

You are a fucking idiot. This isn't news to you, but it's especially relevant right now, when you realize you're feeling angrier than usual because you've never seen your best friend - the guy you are stupidly in love with, no matter how much you tell yourself it'll never fucking happen - crack a smile.

There are a lot of emotions you've never seen on Thay's face, on account of him being a bleachling and just not emoting all that much at all. Rage. Despair. Disgust. You've seen him pleased, but that wasn't worth a smile to Thay - when he's pleased, his face is relaxed, and his chin bobs in this quick short nod.

(You live for those fucking nods, cuz you're a fucking moron)

And you've seen him laugh - well, laugh by Thay standards. Your sense of humor is as warped as the rest you, but for some fucking reason, Thay finds you funny, and when he does, you get a Thay laugh - a short but audible exhale through his nose.

(Those weird little breaths make your day. Like a fucking idiot)

The thing is, you know he fakes it for other people. Other people find his lack of expression "creepy." Because they're stupid. The fact he doesn't bother with that when he's talking to you is a sign of trust, and you treasure that, by Thamir you do -

But you want to see what your friend looks like when experiencing pure joy. No, that ain't it. You want to cause him pure joy. You want to see him smile and know it's because of you.

Here's the part that makes you an idiot: he handed you the opportunity to do that years ago, and you said no.

It was a few months after you first met. You were passing through Brastlewark, so you stopped by the library to say hi, and he asked if you'd like to get dinner together sometime. And you wanted to say yes, because Thay's smart and kind and cute and funny and so far outta your league, and you'd already started daydreaming about his wispy white hair and charcoal gray eyes, and also he'd probably insist on paying because he's the one with a job, and you never say no to free food just on principle -

But getting that close would mean telling him about the Thing, and you know he'd hate you forever the moment he learned about the Thing. Better to just stay friends.

That left you a dilemma: how to turn him down? Cuz you can't say "sorry, can't, cuz then I'd have to tell you the truth about how absolutely shit I am as a person, and you'd never want to see me again." But you also don't want to give him the impression that he's somehow failed to meet your standards (cuz you don't have standards, but if you did he'd have outdone them a hundred times over). But you also -

"I'm straight." Sweet Silent Blade why did you pick that lie?!

It did the trick, of course. He nodded, but with a little crease between his eyebrows (that's his "accepting disappointing news" face) and thanked you for "your forthrightness." Because what else was he going to say? "No you're not"?? Sure, you could think of a few people you'd met who might say that, but not Thay. Even if he suspected you lied, he'd have the good sense to realize you were trying to let him down easy.

You don't regret it, not exactly. Well, you do, but you don't see what else you could've done without telling him about the Thing. But it seems like the longer you know him, the more you wish you could've just gone to dinner with him. Sometimes you think about just asking him out - but even if it was acceptable to do that without discussing the Thing (it's not), it's been years. He's definitely over you by now. Probably wonders what he ever saw in you in the first place, cuz even without the Thing, you're a pretty twisted motherfucker.

But that doesn't change the fact that you love him - or as close to love as your warped heart can manage. Doesn't change the fact that you want to bring him joy.

"You know," you say casually one day, "I don't think I've ever seen you smile."

Thay looks at you with a blank expression. "Well, I must keep some secrets, or you'll grow bored of me."

It's a joke, you're pretty sure - he's rarely completely expressionless, but he is as he delivers his line. It's also the only answer you get, and for the millionth time you wish you could've just said yes.

[s1ithers]

stolen throne screed. trying to reserve judgment in case this is going somewhere, but good god why'd they make maric such a dweeb. it's killing me. i have to talk shit.

this is such a bizarre character introduction, i can't tell how we're meant to take it. he's the son of a rebel queen growing up on the run with this guerilla army, but he treats it like his mom's boring job. he knows fuckall. when people declare fealty to him he doesn't know what to say. this guy who's been a prince all his life doesn't have (1) appropriate stock response drilled into him. he barely remembers how to knight a guy. he can't ride a horse. ask him anything about the war he's like wuhhh idk, mom does all that. sucks we have to march so much :(

like i hate him? his (mother's) followers are described as ragged & starving for this cause. our man cannot be bothered. i hate him so much

sure, 'hapless idiot = Relatable(tm)' is....a school....of protagonist design. 'naive young hero grows into leadership role' is a time-honored arc. but what hits so weird is the lack of splashover from this to the rest of the world, fine & good to make your protag a spoiled little shit but where's the in-universe logic for why he's like this?

moira is set up as a great queen and so far it seems like we're meant to take this description at face value. so this great ruler, whose goal is specifically the restoration of her bloodline to the throne, just couldn't be bothered to train her heir to even the most basic level. so the queen's characterization starts to fall apart. which makes the dedication of her followers less convincing. so you get this chain reaction of characterization issues that hollows out the whole thing

or maybe the queen intentionally sheltered her son to the point of uselessness for (???) reasons, which you'd think would take serious effort considering he grew up literally in army camps shoulder to shoulder with hardened guerrillas who're suffering all these hardships & risking their lives & apparently cool with the grownass adult prince mooning around just like, plugged into his gameboy in the back seat. which would set up an interesting dynamic! if it felt like the book was doing it on purpose. if that turns out to be the case i'll eat this post lol

but it's like, 'feckless princeling' is a type, and 'beloved warrior queen' is a type, and 'scrappy rebel army,' and they're all just sort of plucked out of the genre bag without much thought for how they interact or what meaning they create when juxtaposed yknow. and i feel like so often when the writing in DA falls down for me, it's because of this, the narrative locks into treating a character as the type or genre figure they represent, rather than respond to what they actually do or how they're situated in diegetic context

gamlen might be the ur-example of this to me. he absolutely got shafted by their parents. it's 100% fair to ask your relatives who've been crashing in your shitty apartment for a year to help out with rent and food. but he's designated Surly Deadbeat Uncle so he's not allowed to have a point. anders is the healer, what does he do in his free time? eh, he heals. running a nonprofit clinic for 7 years has no bearing on his role as the Preachy SJW Friend. it's writ large in da:i

it breaks the illusion of a living world bc background characters aren't allowed to react authentically. they have to look at this dipshit and be like ~ yay our beloved prince :) ~ they're just narrative puppets. it cheapens the MCs for obvious reasons

it's interesting bc da:o is so consciously built around inverting genre tropes and how that carries forward or doesn't as the series goes on. what gets identified as a Trope for that treatment and what seems to go unexamined

i think TST is suffering from the franchise's awkward genre transition. it sets up a story about rebellion & occupation, i went in wanting/expecting... obviously not realism, but at least as heavy stakes as da:o mostly tried to orient itself around. but maric (& rowan) feel more like characters from d&d-type light fantasy where that kind of thing really is meant to be a backdrop for the player characters to romp around in

AND. also from the series' long-running weirdness about what it is exactly the nobility are and do. but i think i've hit my daily word limit for bitching about DA lol

[disneyanddisneyships]

So it's canon that Al visits some cannibal colony in hell because he IS one.

And the funny thing is he doesn't even wear a hate but he makes one just to throw it at those ladies munching on another demon 💀

*in charlie's voice* so... I've been thinking..

What if Al shows Aponi around (because you mentioned she "feels other butterflies in her stomach" iykyk) and the ladies are just... there. Like, "Hey alastor😍🤞" and he greets them back politely, but without the hat bit. 'Cause he's just being a gentleman and is gentler to women (women who dont point spears to him)

And Aponi's just "🙂" and Al's clueless about it 'cause they're in their early stages of their relationship. (Yes. Jealous Aponi. I give you)

Ohohohohooooo jealous aponi

Okay this is and Alastor x OC fic

Aponi was fast asleep. Having a good dream for once about going to heaven and seeing her father and brother.

She sighed happily in her sleep with a small smile, her cat curled up right next to her.

"Hello my darling!" Alastor exclaimed as he practically broke down her door.

She jumped up in suprise as her cat hissed and scurried away.

"Al, what are you doing. Its-" she checked her phone. "Its 6 in the morning," she finished before stretching and yawning.

"Well get up and get ready! I'm taking you to the cannibal colony today!" He exclaimed as he walked around her room, looking at her photos in the trash can that used to be hung up on her walls.

"Youre... what? Why? Isn't that like your alone time?" Aponi asked as she got out of bed to find some clothes to wear.

"Well yes-" alastor took notice that she only wore underwear to bed. And then he realized it was getting closer to the time where he'd be in heat. "Uh but I thought I'd show you around today!" He snapped back to what he was talking about.

"Fair enough," Aponi replied as she shrugged on some jeans and an orange crop top. "Just gimme a sec to brush my teeth and shit," She stated as she walked into her bathroom.

Alastor followed her, a small smile on his face and his head tilted in curiosity. He stared as he watched her get ready.

"Uh... are you just gonna watch?" Aponi asked in the middle of putting toothpaste on her toothbrush.

"Indeed!" He replied happily as he leaned against the doorframe.

The couple had been together for a few weeks now, and they weren't used to one another.

"You seem grumpy, my darling!" Alastor commented as he watched her brush her hair.

" you woke me up at 6 in the morning and I haven't had coffee," she replied before walking out of the bathroom to feed her cat.

"Ah I see. I'll go tell husker to get on that right now!" Alastor stated.

"Make sure he doesn't put alcohol in there. He knows I've been sober since I died," Aponi stated to Alastor as he walked out of her apartment.

As she got her shoes on and grabbed her purse, complete with a knife and a tazer, she stretched one more time and walked out of her apartment, being sure to lock the door or else angel would snoop in there to steal her clothes.

"Ah darling I see you're ready! Here's you coffee!" Alastor exclaimed as he brought it to her.

"Oh! Thank you. You didn't have to bring it to me, I wouldn't want to be a bother," Aponi stated.

"Nonsense! Anything for you!" Alastor exclaimed.

Aponi blushed at that as she took a sip of the coffee.

Alastor hooked his arm with hers and began to walk out of the hotel.

Minutes later the couple entered the Cannibal colony.

"Oh over there! They make the best meat pies! They've been here for some time. I dont suppose you've heard of Sweeney Todd?" Alastor asked as he and aponi walked.

"Actually there's a musical about him. So yeah," Aponi replied.

"Really? Oh dear I hope they did him justice. Such an insane man!" Alastor complimented.

"Hi alastor!" A group of lady cannibals called out with flirtatious smiles on their faces.

"Oh hello there! Great to see you!" Alastor called out before walking away.

Aponi turned to stare at them and gave out a growl.

"Aponi, dear, come on!" Alastor called out.

After staring daggers at one of them Aponi walked up to alastor to continue the tour.

When it was over and aponi was in her room she began slamming drawers and such to make food.

"'Hi alastooooor!'" She mimicked in a high pitched mocking voice. "Good God. I bet all of them have a crush on him, fluffy!" Aponi ranted to her cat as she threw some lefr over chicken in her microwave. "I bet he flirts with them too! I mean... how could he not! They're all probably prettier and crazier and....." aponi trailed off and sighed.

The microwave beeped and she took her food out.

"I mean look at me! This is the first real food I've had in days! I dont..... I dont belong here, I don't belong in heaven, and clearly I dont belong with alastor....." she ranted as she threw her chicken away, not even bothering to eat it. She collapsed onto her bed, looking up at her ceiling.

Her cat crawled to snuggle with her, as she sighed at the horrible depressing thoughts running through her head.

A knock sounded at the door.

"Come in," Aponi shouted as she sat up on her bed.

"Ah hello darling! Just coming in to check up on you!" Alastor exclaimed before sniffing the air. "Oh did you eat?" He asked before qponi shook her head and pointed to her trash can.

"I made it. Didn't eat it," she stated before taking off her shoes.

"Whens the last time you ate?" Alastor asked, concerned quietly written in his voice.

"I don't know.. like... last week, I think?" Aponi stated.

"Darling why haven't you been taking care of yourself?" Alastor asked with a wide smile.

"I'm doing fine, Al. You should be worrying about those pretty demons we saw in the colony. 'Hiiii Alastooooor!'" Aponi mimicked with a high voice.

"What the devil are you talking about? Them? Oh please. I was just being friendly, my dear!" Alastor stated.

"Oh I know you were. But they definitely wanna fuck you," Aponi stated.

"What? No they don't! Were all just acquaintances!" Alastor exclaimed.

"Al, when you turned away one of them looked at your ass," Aponi stated.

Alastor's smile was wide as he just stared awkwardly, before realizing aponi hadn't made eye contact with him.

"You're jealous," He stated with a small smile.

"What? No!" Aponi disagreed as a blush made its way onto her features.

"Oh darling I believe you are. Don't worry. You're the only one I've ever truly taken an interest in!" Alastor exclaimed.

Aponi's features morphed into sadness and she sighed.

"I just... my whole life I've felt like I didn't belong anywhere.... I dont belong in heaven, I'm too good for hell... I dont belong with you....." she trailed off.

Alastor smiled before turning her head to look at him and kissing her.

"You belong anywhere as long as you make room through violence!" He stated happily.

Aponi smiled.

[bubacorn]

i just think it's so funny that people sometimes flat-out refuse to listen to me but they don't even notice that they're tuning me out, cause it's so natural for them

like, a while ago, i asked about something to make sure that someone paid attention to it, then they said that it's not important, so i listened and ignored it, even though i knew i was kinda right, but i wasn't sure (it wasn't my responsibility and knew i would make everyone more irritated if i pressed on). then after about a month later that same thing came up again and i asked if i may have been right and then i got 'why didn't you say anything about that?', and told them that i did say something and they had told me to not bother with it. then they said some more things, and told me that 'they weren't saying it was my fault', and then i reminded them that they literally tried to blame me for 'not calling their attention to it' two sentences ago and they looked fucking surprised and couldn't reply. like. am i a joke? (yes, i know i am, it's a rhetorical question)

unrelated (but actually very related), i feel so uncomfortable when people deliberately make noise when they are doing something. like, obnoxiously so. i know it can be sensorily pleasing (and they might not realize that they are doing it for that reason), but for instance, i hate when people intentionally make loud steps barefoot on wooden floor, because it makes an annoying slapping sound, and why do you have to make everyone pay attention and be alerted of your presence? (i know why, rhetorical question again)

also, doing the dishes and consciously making the highest amount of noise you can when you stack them and literally bang them together and against the counter when you put them down. i know i have sensitive ears, i know i tense from loud noises, but i can't say anything, because they are 'just doing the dishes' and aren't doing anything wrong. also i hate it even more, because sometimes you can't tell when just regular loud sounds go over to 'i'm in a shit mood' loud sounds and then you're responsible for every shitty aspect of their day

once a roommate told me that i was so quiet one morning that they didn't even notice me leave (they were sleeping and didn't wake up as i got ready and left), and it stuck with me, cause of course i try to make the least amount of noise possible (and it's extra funny, cause that morning i accidentally made a little banging sound when setting my parfume bottle down on a porcelain shelf), it's obvious for me. i use coasters for my mugs because i don't like the sound of porcelain hitting the table and it's conveniently quiet that way when it needs to be. i shut doors quietly because i imagine no one likes a creaking sound. of course i get ready quietly in the morning, because no one wants to wake up early just because i have to

i make my presence quiet because others live around me and they might want to have a phone call, relax or just simply try to ignore that they have to exist in the same space with other people. yeah, maybe i'm too conscious of the space i take up and the sounds i make by simply existing. and i can't tell others why i'm like this, i know why, but i can't just say that to someone. so i smile and nod, and i'm happy that i'm not bothering them. happy that they literally complimented me for being invisible and easy to ignore and i desperately try to not think of it that way

[tsubasaclones]

all the tsubasa references in clear card are both one of the only interesting things about it and also arguably its biggest flaw. and the fact that it's one of the only interesting things about it contributes to it being its biggest flaw.

like, i'm obviously not saying to get rid of the tsubasa references. they're fun when they're done right, they're to be expected, they're even integral to the story. after all, the whole magic staff thing connects to tsubasa. which is the point of clear card

this sequel would not exist without tsubasa because really the only purpose it solves is to be like "oh see she has another staff after she gives the other one away". which is a problem. this is a sequel that does basically nothing for the original story, it only exists to aid a single scene in a separate story, and yet it's 30 fucking chapters longer that the original ccs manga for no good reason.

they try to replicate tsubasa sooo hard in clear card and it just does not fucking work 99% of the time. the reason they try so hard to make akiho and kaito carbon copies of sakura and syaoran [which doesn't fucking work by the way, i'm just acknowledging that's what they were ATTEMPTING]? well, other than a lazy way to try and get us to like them without trying... you know what story has two syaorans and sakuras in it? the one they keep fucking paralleling. cause the parallels also extend sometimes to akiho and kaito, especially kaito (I HATE IT HERE.)

why are we suddenly throwing in random timeline changing shit at the end?* oh wouldn't you know it tsubasa has a plot about an altered timeline (which, while it gets revealed near the end of tsubasa, happened before the story started, so it doesn't feel nearly as sudden as clear card's timeline shit)

and the last chapter... she has the original cards back and the new ones are gone but can be found again, the whole real name shit, some characters staying back while others go to keep travelling and they kind of hint at meeting up again... there are so many parallels throughout the story i'm not even bothering to put here because you get the idea already surely.

but just... starting off clear card acting like you might not do the gross age gap shit anymore only to shove that stuff in our faces super hard by the end, introducing characters then ignoring their original traits to try and make them copies of already existing characters, using the original ccs story and tsubasa as crutches to avoid making something original... guys come on we're better than this. and the fact that she doesn't even get to keep the clear cards by the end (minus flight) feels like an extra slap in the face cause it's just like oh okay it was ALL pointless then

not to mention so much stuff just passively happens to sakura instead of her actively doing stuff in clear card. it's fine in the beginning when she doesn't know what's going on, but then when she learns, and then she's still subconsciously making cards, and then the most important thing (and only purpose of this goddamn sequel) happens, when she conveniently gets a second staff, it's not because of anything *she* did. it's because it was a byproduct of kaito's timeline fuckery. and then when she fixes the timeline (because the only thing she gets to actively do is fixing someone else's fuckup i guess!) she still has two staves so it's just. agh

anyway what was i saying? oh right clear card frustrates me to no end and if i wanted to read tsubasa i would go read tsubasa so stop trying to copy your old shit clamp

*yeah i know that's what kaito's plan was building up to, what i mean is the timeline gets changed and it gets resolved in such a short amount of time (i mean chapter wise, i almost forgot there was that random ass long time skip)