#not sure why but i felt the need to hand write this one
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ssa-dado · 3 days ago
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24 - Logos
Aaron Hotchner x fem!bau!reader Genre: fluff, hurt/comfort, SMUT Summary: A few weeks ago, Aaron had read a passage from Plato's Symposium - "And when one of them meets the other half, the actual half of himself... the pair are lost in an amazement of love and friendship and intimacy, and one will not be out of the other's sight, even for a moment." He hadn’t fully understood it. Not until he found himself sitting on your couch at 3 a.m. Warnings: + 18 MINORS DNI (I will ground you) alcohol consumption, some cuss words here and there, VERY GRAPHIC AND DESCRIPTIVE SEX because I'm a weirdo, it's basically porn with philosophy (not in the middle of it - of course - I'm not that weird), dirty talk, unprotected sex, piv, oral sex and a lot of pining. Hotch is a whore. Word Count: 18.9k Dado's Corner: I don’t know, I’m both proud and deeply insecure about posting this. It’s my first time writing smut. Ever. I have no idea if it’s good. No idea if it’s too much or too little - if I over-explained things or if I didn’t explain enough. It’s their first time actually sober, and they’re supposed to be a little cringe - uncertain, hesitant, not entirely sure what to do with each other or where they fit and that’s deliberate. I wanted it to feel real - flawed, messy, something that isn’t just perfect and seamless, but human. There’s good and bad, there’s laughter and uncertainty, there are tears of joy and tears of fear. And I just hope it feels like something.
masterlist ; mandatory first part because if you skip this, you'll be utterly lost and it's not my fault
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In Stoic philosophy, logos represents the rational principle that governs the universe, uniting logic, physics, and ethics into a cohesive worldview. It is the divine reason permeating all existence, structuring nature according to order and necessity.
In Stoic logic, logos manifests as the foundation of rational thought, guiding human reasoning toward clarity and truth. Mastery of logic enables individuals to distinguish between valid judgments and deceptive impressions, ensuring alignment with reality.
In physics, logos is the active, organizing force (pneuma) that sustains and directs the cosmos. Everything unfolds according to its rational design, making the universe an interconnected, purposeful whole rather than a realm of randomness.
In ethics, living in accordance with logos means harmonizing one’s will with nature’s rational order. By cultivating wisdom, self-discipline, and virtue, individuals align their actions with universal reason, achieving tranquility and moral integrity in a world shaped by necessity and change.
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Happiness is a complex concept - or at least, it became one once thinkers like Aristotle started overanalyzing it.
He distinguished between fleeting pleasure (hedonia) and deeper fulfillment (eudaimonia), and ever since, that debate has been stitched into the fabric of western culture.
Now, most people unknowingly follow this hierarchical model of happiness, never realizing it originated from a handful of bored, existentially troubled men desperately trying to intellectualize their own misery.
Maybe that’s why it’s considered completely normal to ask if someone is really happy - because centuries of philosophy decided that happiness alone isn’t enough – it had to be the right kind of happiness.
And yet, even you weren’t immune to that trap. Because standing there, dancing with Aaron, you admitted to yourself that you were, in fact, truly happy.
Not just for yourself, but for him - for the man who, for the first time since signing his divorce papers a few months ago finally looked light. Not weighed down. Not lost in some invisible battle in his mind. Just… happy.
And the moment felt so sweet, a microcosm where locking eyes with each other was ordinary conduct in such close proximity, where neither of you felt the need to temper that undeniable - if slightly terrifying - undercurrent of chemistry.
Just the understanding that this was safe, that this was allowed.
And somehow, that made it even sweeter.
Not just the warmth of it, not just the effortless way you fit into this tight space together, but the inescapable fact that your probably borderline-manipulative plan to drag him out of his self-imposed exile - had actually worked.
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"Now you have to tell me how you managed to get not only Rossi but Hotch to join us tonight, sweet Teach - what kind of sorcery did you pull?" Penelope beamed, not even giving you a second to breathe after you’d opened the door to your apartment.
Ever since she got shot and still struggled with being alone in her house, the two of you had built this little ritual - getting ready together, spending a few hours just the two of you in your apartment before a night out.
A win-win, really, considering you also took your time settling into this place, figuring out how to make it feel like home. Penelope had even been the one to help you unpack your very last box, and now this little tradition had taken root.
She brought the wine, you experimented with vegan appetizers - some more successful than others - and the two of you would rant, gossip, and talk about everything and nothing. But, most importantly, Penelope took on the herculean mission of wrangling your ridiculously high-maintenance team into one place for a night out.
It was a diplomatic nightmare. The venue had to be quiet enough for Spencer but still have music good enough for Derek, serve whatever mocktail JJ was obsessed with that month, and somehow accommodate Emily’s inevitable last-minute curveballs - which, incidentally, was how Spencer found himself at a drag show for the first time.
Shockingly, he’d been asking to go back to that bar ever since.
You, meanwhile, were more like Penelope’s unpaid secretary. She desperately needed one, given the sheer level of effort it took to coordinate this mess.
"You asked, and I delivered," you said, shrugging. "Told Rossi that Hotch was coming, told Aaron that Rossi was coming too - he actually turned out to be much easier to persuade."
"I wonder why… oh, right," Penelope sing-songed, eyes gleaming. "Big Bossman has a soft spot for you, smiley little thing."
You rolled your eyes. "The fact that we’re friends doesn’t change that he is infuriatingly stubborn once he makes up his mind. So annoying."
"Nine years of ‘friendship’" Penelope quipped, stretching the word out suspiciously.
"Actually, it’s ten," you corrected, sipping your wine as you settled onto your kitchen stool.
Penelope gasped - full dramatic hand-to-chest gasp. "Oh my STARS and MOONS! Ten years?! And you didn’t tell me?! What did you do? What did he do? Just the two of you , alone somewhere private, existing in your natural secretive habitats like the little pretty, reserved, woodland creatures you two are… especially now that he’s divor-"
"Whoa, whoa, slow down, Pen!" you cut her off before she could run that train straight off the rails. "How many times have I told you we're-"
But no. She didn’t let you finish.
"Oh, Teach!" she grinned, eyes sparkling enough to concern you. "I was just suggesting you two do something to celebrate… something you two love to do. You know, stay up all night bonding over files… bending over files…"
You choked.
Actually choked.
Wine went straight up your nose, burned your throat, and splattered all over you, going everywhere.
Your counter.
Your floor.
Your poor, innocent, pristine white pants.
Penelope screamed - but not in horror, in absolute, unhinged delight.
"OH MY GOD," she cackled, slapping a hand against your back like that would somehow help you breathe again. "I HAVE NEVER BROKEN YOU SO FAST."
You wheezed, still coughing. "Penelope-"
She wiped a fake tear from her eye, grinning. "Oh no, sweet pea. You absolutely just got - wait." She paused mid-celebration, tilting her head as if she had just made a discovery.
Then, in a tone far too calm for the amount of damage she was about to inflict - "Much like I imagine Aaron Hotchner could do."
A horrible, inhuman noise clawed its way out of your throat - your last dying breath, probably.
Penelope lost it. Full-body laughter, already snatching a towel but making zero effort to hide the criminal glint in her eyes.
"I’m just saying," she went on, barely containing herself, "you and Mr. Tall, Dark, and Emotionally Repressed have this whole agonizingly slow-burn, will-they-won’t-they, tragic yearning thing going on, and you know I’m right."
You groaned, dabbing furiously at the stain. "There is nothing slow-burn about a decade-long friendship."
"Aha! So you admit it’s a burn!" Penelope beamed, pointing at you like she had just cracked a conspiracy wide open.
The more you dabbed, the worse it got - just like this conversation, apparently. "Oh, no, I never-”
"All I’m saying is," she steamrolled over you, completely unfazed, "the energy you two radiate is so thick I could slather it on a bagel. Toasted chemistry. Smothered in slow-burn spread. One time I saw him look at you like you personally hand-crafted happiness from scratch just for him. Like you reached into the fabric of the universe and said, ‘Here you go, Hotchner, a reason to believe in joy again.’"
You paused, glaring at her. "That is insane."
She ignored you, fully in the zone now. "And don’t even get me started on the way you look at him when he isn’t paying attention."
You looked at him completely normally. Totally neutral. A textbook, regulation-approved gaze.
Even Anderson looked at him with more fervor than you ever did - and as far as you knew, he wasn’t even into men.
You scoffed, crossing your arms. "And how exactly do I look at him, Penelope? Enlighten me."
She grinned - dangerously - and leaned in like she was about to drop the biggest bombshell of your life. "Like you already know what he looks like naked and are trying very, very hard not to think about it."
You froze.
For exactly half a second - which, unfortunately, was half a second too long.
Penelope’s entire face dropped. Eyes huge. Mouth hanging open. A moment of stunned silence. And then-
"OH. MY. GOD."
Your stomach plummeted. "Penelope, don’t-"
"OH MY GOD. YOU DID."
"Penelope," you tried again, desperately attempting to rein in the chaos - but, to your credit, you did at least try to keep your voice level.
"JESUS, MARY, AND EMILY PRENTISS, YOU TOTALLY DID THE HORIZONTAL TANGO WITH AARON HOTCHNER. YOU SNEAKY LITTLE MINX. HOW DARE YOU HIDE THIS FROM ME?!"
"Penelope, for the love of-" you started, but of course she chimed in again.
"WHEN?! WHERE?! HOW?! DETAILS, WOMAN!"
You exhaled through your nose, dragging a hand down your face because there was no getting out of this.
"Once," you muttered. "Nine years ago."
Silence.
Then, with the most scandalized expression you've ever witnessed on her face, she shrieked, "ONLY ONCE?!"
You threw your hands up. "Yes, only once! And never again."
"WHY ONLY ONCE?!" she shrieked, as if you had just admitted to committing the single greatest injustice known to mankind.
You exhaled, bracing yourself, hoping that a little honesty might finally get her to calm down. "Because, at the time… I might have had a bit of a crush on him. And we were coworkers. And it wasn’t exactly… ethic-"
"FUCK THE ETHICAL!" she screamed, thrilled by the sheer scandal of it all.
You should have seen that coming."Penelope!"
She flailed her arms so violently she nearly knocked over her wine glass, eyes wide "You had a crush on him?! ON HOTCH?! AND YOU ONLY DID IT ONCE?! Oh, I cannot with you right now. You are so infuriating sometimes! You have the emotional restraint of a saint, and I do not mean that as a compliment."
"We were both drunk, and it was a mistake. It happened, we moved on, and that was the end of it. We’re friends, and that’s all it’s ever going to be." you said, unwavering. " Honestly, I don’t even think about it anymore - sometimes, I even laugh about it."
Penelope squinted, gears visibly turning in that devious head of hers, already cooking up something absolutely unhinged. "Mmm-hmm. Okay. Fine. Sure. Let’s pretend I accept that. But-"
Oh no.
"-if it were to happen again, hypothetically speaking, do you think it would be even better now that he’s aged like a fine, expensive, top-shelf wine? And, and, anddd - follow-up question - on a purely objective, scientific level - how would you rate him? You know, visually?"
"Penelope!" you groaned, but unfortunately, your traitorous brain had already started answering the question.
Yes.
And no comment.
"Okay, okay, fine, no ratings," she huffed dramatically, rolling her eyes so hard you were surprised she didn't sprain something. "But-"
This was it. Your moment. Time to end this madness with a good old, firm, satisfying -"No."
But, of course, that would have been too good to be true.
She continued "-would you say he's more on the impressively sized side or-"
"Penelope, please." You were already suffering.
She waved you off like your dignity was a minor inconvenience to her scientific research. "Listen, I’m just saying," she went on, tone now fully deranged, "the man carries himself like he’s got something to be confident about. Big hands, big energy, big…"
You froze. "Do not finish that sentence."
"BIG, HUGE D-"
Time to draw the line.
You shot up so fast your chair went flying, rattling against the floor as you grabbed your phone.
Penelope screeched. "Wait - what are you doing?!"
You scrolled, thumb unwavering, and hit call. "Giving you a direct source."
Her soul left her body. "NO. NO, YOU WOULD NOT-"
You absolutely would.
And you did.
"Come on," you said, completely deadpan, as the dial tone rang. "It’s just Aaron."
Penelope malfunctioned. She glitched like a corrupted file. She stared at you, horrified, mouth moving but no sound coming out.
"He’s just 'Aaron' to you?" she whispered, her hands flailed before slamming onto the table as if physically stabilizing herself. "No last name? No title? Just oh, you know, my casual little ex-lover, Aaron? Just ‘hello, this is a man I have been biblically familiar with, Aaron?’ Just ‘we had sex nine years ago, and now he’s simply Aaron, like we’re old college roommates and not two people who have seen each other naked’"
…Hmm. Well. Yes?
To be fair, you’d never really thought about it before. It just… happened. One day, he was Hotch, then - sometime after that night - he was Aaron. And after that, you never really stopped.
No big discussion, no conscious decision - just a shift so seamless that you hadn’t even registered it until right now, in this very moment, with Penelope practically having a full-body breakdown in your kitchen.
Not important. Moving on.
Because, frankly, you had bigger concerns - like how you were about to experience instant, irreversible consequences for your actions, since the call, after one, two, three rings-
Connected.
"Hello?" His voice came through the line - slightly huffed, a little breathless, like he’d just moved across the room.
"You took a while to pick up," you said casually - a joke, a throwaway comment.
There was a pause. A beat.
And then, in that deadly flat, unbothered tone of his, he answered, "I was still in the shower."
You froze.
Penelope froze.
Somewhere, on the opposite side of your living room wall, your elderly neighbor Mrs. Lee - who had been subtly not subtly eavesdropping through the thin drywall of your apartment - probably froze.
You could feel Penelope vibrating beside you, gripping your arm so tightly she was cutting off circulation, meanwhile, your brain was running in circles, slamming against metaphorical walls, and screaming into the void because-
Aaron in the shower.
Aaron, freshly out of the shower.
Aaron, picking up the phone, standing there, probably half-naked, hair wet-
No. Nope. Absolutely not.
You leaned back against the counter, schooling your expression into something completely unfazed. "Well, now I feel bad for interrupting."
"I doubt that," he said dryly. "Is something wrong?"
"Not at all. It’s just that Penelope had something very important to ask you," you said, glancing over at her with the most innocent, borderline sadistic smile you could muster.
"I - what - no, I don’t-" she sputtered, frantically shaking her head and waving her hands.
Aaron, still completely unaware of the impending disaster, said, "What is it, Penelope?"
Dead silence.
Garcia looked like she had been struck by divine retribution.
"Go on," you mouthed, biting back a grin. "Ask him."
She opened her mouth. Closed it. Opened it again.
Nothing.
Just the sound of sheer existential regret.
"Garcia?" Aaron prompted, his tone patient, if slightly concerned.
"I - um - hi, sir Sir," she finally managed, voice several octaves higher than usual. "I - I just - well, you know - um. How was your shower?"
You slapped a hand over your mouth to keep from screaming.
Aaron, completely unfazed, just answered like this was a normal human interaction,"It was fine."
"Good! That’s great!" Garcia blurted, nodding furiously at no one in particular. "Love a good shower! Love hygiene! So important! Huge fan of cleanliness! Showering - what a concept! Water? Incredible. Soap? Revolutionary. Scrubbing? Life-changing. Anyway, I have to go bye!"
And then she hung up so fast it was a miracle she didn’t break the phone.
You just stared at her.
She just stared back.
Then, in perfect sync -
You both screamed, laughing.
"You traitor!" Penelope wheezed, still half-laughing, half-mortified.
"You were the one who wanted answers!" you gasped, nearly crying from laughter.
"Not from him directly!" she shrieked, burying her face in her hands like that could somehow reverse time - but she was laughing anyway, because this was, undeniably, the funniest and most horrifying thing that had ever happened.
"Well, I just saved you the effort," you teased.
She ripped her hands away from her face, wild-eyed. "You made me ask our boss about his shower."
"You made me listen to your entire dissertation on whether or not he’s impressively sized - I feel like we’re even."
You still somehow winced thinking back about it.
She groaned, collapsing against the counter. "I will never recover from this."
"Oh, I’m sure you absolutely will," you said, reaching for the wine bottle. "Do you want more wine?"
She lifted her head just enough to nod. Begrudgingly.
You poured, sliding her glass across the counter. Then, with the kind of magnanimous generosity only wine-fueled chaos could inspire, you added, "And - because I am a good friend - I will allow you one question about that night. One. With a detail."
Penelope snapped upright faster than the speed of light, gasping. "Oh, this is the best day of my life."
You chuckled, shaking your head, sipping from your own glass too. "Make it count."
She took a deep breath, steadied herself, and then, she leaned in and whispered- "Was it at least good enough that you'd do it sober?"
You nearly choked, again. "Penelope!"
She lifted a hand. "No, no, no, this is a very fair, very respectable question."
Sure, a question that required another sip of wine to be answered, especially because at this point you literally had nothing more to lose. "Penelope, I would do it sober, wide awake, fully caffeinated, after eight hours of sleep, in a well-lit room, with a legally binding contract ensuring I’d remember every single second."
Penelope screamed.
"OH MY GOD," she wailed, collapsing onto the counter. "THIS IS MY NEW FAVORITE NIGHT."
You took another sip, completely unfazed, as she flailed so hard she nearly launched herself off the stool.
"I NEED TO LIE DOWN," she gasped, gripping onto the counter for support. "I NEED TO CALL EMILY. JJ – OH SWEET LITTLE JJ – SHE’S IN NEW ORLEANS SHE DOESN’T EVEN KNOW”
"You need to calm down," you deadpanned.
She pointed at you, accusatory, still half-breathless from screaming. "You were gonna take this to the grave. You were gonna let me die not knowing this. ME. PENELOPE GARCIA. The person who has kept all of your secrets and asked for nothing in return except unfiltered chaos."
"I was absolutely going to take this to the grave," you confirmed, refilling your wine.
She let out a dramatic gasp. "YOU MONSTER."
You shrugged. "You survived."
She slammed a hand on the table. "You know who wouldn’t have survived?"
You tilted your head. "Who?"
She leaned in, eyes glinting. "Aaron Hotchner."
You made a low, strangled noise in the back of your throat.
"Oh, he absolutely wouldn’t have survived if he knew this just came out of your mouth," she continued, giddy, thriving off the absolute chaos she had unleashed. Then, dead serious - "Text him right now and tell him."
You slammed your wine down. "I am definetely not texting him that."
"Why not?!" she howled.
"Because I told you - I’m never doing that. Ever. I’m serious. If I could go back in time and relive that sober? Sure. But not. Now."
She narrowed her eyes, assessing, calculating.
"Okay, okay, alright then - next question." she said too fast, taking a sip like she was preparing for battle. "Do you think he’d do it sober?"
You opened your mouth - but nothing came out. Because you hadn’t actually thought about that before.
Penelope gasped so loudly that you were surprised the walls didn’t shake. "OH MY GOD, YOU DON’T KNOW."
"I-"
"OH MY GOD, WHAT IF HE THINKS ABOUT IT, WHAT IF HE REGRETS NOT DOING IT AGAIN."
"Penelope," you said slowly, carefully, " you know what? I have reached my limit. This conversation is getting put away. We are going to the bathroom, I am curling your hair, and we are talking about something else."
"You know, Teach," she mused, stretching luxuriously as she grabbed her wine glass. "You have a really weird way of showing love."
You took a slow sip of wine, watching her over the rim of your glass. “I agree - it’s because I hate you just as much as I love you, PG. Opposites aren’t really opposites, you know? They kind of fold into each other - love, hate… same fire, same burn. Maybe that’s why it’s so hard to tell where one ends and the other begins.”
You were actually proud of this philosophical pearl of wisdom. Penelope? Not so much.
She cut you off immediately. "Oh my GOD, this explains so much. This is exactly why you and Hotch looked like you were about to fuck in the middle of the bullpen yesterday."
"PENELOPE."
She pointed at you, completely unbothered. "OH NO NO NO - I was sitting there, minding my own business, when suddenly you two were arguing about the profile like you were in some kind of battle for dominance, standing way too close, talking way too low, making way too much direct eye contact."
"We were disagreeing about the profile."
"YOU WERE HAVING A MENTAL THREESOME WITH THE PROFILE BETWEEN YOU."
You let your head drop onto the counter.
She kept going. "It was totally foreplay - and then, mid-argument, he even took you to his office."
You lifted your head just enough to glare at her. "We went to his office to continue the discussion in private."
"Sure..." she grinned, skipping toward the bathroom. "Fine, fine. But just so you know," she threw a look over her shoulder, "if Hotch ever does take you to his office for anything other than work, I expect a full report."
Oh fucking hell.
"I hope your curls come out uneven," you muttered, grabbing the curling iron.
"I hope you get stuck in an elevator with him," she shot back.
You narrowed your eyes. "I hope you trip in your heels tonight."
She grinned wider. "I hope Hotch sits across from you at the bar and just stares at your lips the whole time."
You scoffed. "I hope your mascara smudges so bad you look like a raccoon by the end of the night."
She perked up. "I hope you two sneak away to the bathrooms at the bar, and you have to keep quiet while he-"
"PENELOPE."
She continued, undeterred, "I hope he backs you up against the bar, leans down all serious like he’s about to tell you something important - and then just whispers the filthiest thing you’ve ever heard."
"I hope you break a heel on the way there and have to borrow one of Morgan’s sneakers."
"I hope he offers you his jacket and you realize it still smells like his cologne and suddenly you’re thinking about it again."
"I hope you stub your toe so hard you rethink everything."
"I hope he says your name in that low voice of his, and for a split second, you remember exactly what he sounded like nine years ago-"
"I hope you spill something on your dress and have to go home early."
She cackled, victorious. "I hope you wake up in his bed and don't regret a single thing."
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And maybe, exactly because the two of you had this conversation, you shouldn’t have agreed to go to the bar together in a single car – hers.
You should have seen this coming.
Indeed, as you and Aaron made your way back to the bar, drinks in hand, you spotted Derek and Penelope approaching with a very specific look on their faces.
Derek clapped a hand on your shoulder and said, "Teach - Babygirl had too many drinks to drive, I’m bringing her back home, can-"
Aaron didn’t even let him finish.
"I’ll give the professor a ride," he said immediately, smooth, confident, like he had already made up his mind before Derek even spoke. "You go, Morgan. See you tomorrow morning."
You barely had time to process how utterly inevitable this was - how there was no escaping the tension that had been building up all night until the very moment you stepped out of his car and reached your apartment door.
And then - Penelope smirked.
The smuggest, most self-satisfied, most evil little smirk in existence. You hoped, deeply and sincerely, that this wasn’t her plan all along - but judging by the way she waved so innocently as Derek dragged her away, eyes twinkling like the devil himself-
Yeah. You were doomed.
You were doomed the second you and Aaron stepped out of the bar and, with zero effort, he pushed open the massive, heavy wooden door like it weighed nothing at all. Casual. Effortless. Like he hadn’t even thought about it.
Just naturally stepped aside, one hand braced firmly on the doorframe, the other resting lightly against the door, waiting – watching - as you walked past him.
You were even more doomed when you reached his car and - of course - he opened the passenger seat for you too.
Didn’t even let you reach for it yourself.
Just beat you to it with ease, pulling it open - but instead of walking away immediately, he lingered for half a second longer, his hand still resting on the handle, holding it just firmly enough so he could be the one to shut you in himself.
Like this wasn’t already a lost art. Like this was just how things were supposed to be.
To top it all off, he got in, and as he backed out of the parking spot, his arm reached behind your headrest, fingers resting exactly there, his body leaning in just slightly closer as he turned to glance over his shoulder.
You had never wanted to fight for your life more.
Not because of the closeness.
Not because of the way his short-sleeved polo shifted, muscles tensing subtly, biceps flexing just enough as he turned the wheel -
No.
It was because he chose this exact moment to mutter, in that low, distracted, completely serious voice, something about the structural failures of public infrastructure.
"Parking lots aren’t properly illuminated," he murmured, half to himself, half to you, as he pulled out of the space - leaning in just enough for you to be wrapped in the warmth of his woody cologne. "Streetlamps are too far apart - against regulation. Visibility’s compromised."
You blinked.
It was so incredibly Hotchner of him to be thinking about streetlamp regulations at a time like this that you nearly lost your mind.
But you couldn’t even react, because then he turned on the car radio. And instead of some normal, pre-set station, it booted right into his most recent activity.
Which meant - of course - it immediately picked up in the middle of whatever custom CD he had been listening to on the way to the bar.
You had exactly one second to register the unfamiliar tune before it clicked - this was from whatever Broadway musical he was currently obsessed with.
Oh, he was such a loser.
You turned your head toward him, but Aaron - unfazed, unbothered - simply reached forward and turned the volume down to a casual, background level.
Like this was all perfectly normal.
Like you hadn’t just caught him.
"Aaron." You bit back a smirk.
He kept his eyes firmly on the road, expression unreadable. "Hmm?"
"Which one is this?" you asked, already knowing the answer but needing him to say it out loud.
"Wicked," he muttered. Then, quickly -"I can change it."
"Oh no, no, don’t you dare, Hotchner." You chuckled, settling in. "Always wondered what your music taste sounds like."
He exhaled deeply. "It is not only this-" he started, trying, truly trying to make you understand the complexity of his other music tastes, to defend his honor, but – they just started singing. And he knew.
He knew.
You were never going to let him live this down. Better off saving his breath.
Hilarious, and the best part? He didn’t even know he was.
Halfway through, you tilted your head, listening. "So this whole song is about two girls absolutely hating each other because they’re complete opposites, but they’re forced to be roommates?"
"Pretty much, yes." His answer a little too quiet, and - though he tried to hide it - deeply embarrassed.
You grinned. "It kinda sounds like they have a crush on each other," you commented, trying your best not to notice how his fingers tapped the wheel, completely in rhythm with the song, while his face remained perfectly composed - extremely normal about something he so clearly wasn't at all.
"That’s the whole point," he said, deadpan, keeping it short.
"Oh “ You blinked. “Do they get together at the end?"
"Unfortunately not." He sounded so genuinely bitter about it that you nearly laughed. "They become best friends, though."
Though, judging by the way his gaze flicked toward you for half a second, he wasn’t entirely sure if you were still talking about the musical - or something else entirely.
Especially when you simply hummed, turning to look out the window. "Best friends."
"Yes. Best friends." His fingers tightened on the wheel.
And damn if you didn’t let the silence linger just a beat too long.
"They don’t get together because they’re completely different, so they’re not compatible?" you asked, your voice just a little too earnest.
"Not because of that," he started. "It’s because one of them becomes a political fugitive and is declared a national threat, while the other is essentially forced into being the corrupt government’s PR puppet."
Ah. Okay.
There was no possible way to explain it in a way that didn’t completely kill the mood - impossible, really. But he tried anyway.
"Although," he added, keeping his voice even, measured, like this was not something he had many thoughts on, "they do have a really dramatic goodbye, where they sing about how much they changed each other’s lives and how they’ll never be the same again."
He felt you turn toward him, and though he kept his eyes on the road, he felt it - that shift in your attention, God knows on what, though.
"Best friends," you repeated.
He gripped the wheel just a little too tight. "Best friends," he confirmed, again.
A beat. A pause. Too long.
"And you think it would have been better if they had been together?" Your question landed way too heavy, like you knew exactly how much weight it carried.
Like you knew exactly how his mind worked, how he had spent far too long thinking about this, not just in the context of some musical, but in general.
He exhaled, keeping his eyes fixed ahead, but his grip tightened again.
And then-
"Fuck yes," the words left his mouth way too fast.
So fast that he heard you laugh before he even saw you smile from the rereview mirror of the car.
And God - that laugh.
It wrecked him.
Not because it was loud or sudden, but because it was yours. Because it was real. Unguarded. Effortless. Because it was him that pulled it from you - and it was then, in that moment, that he knew.
He was so, so fucked.
Because this wasn’t new. This wasn’t some sudden realization, some reckless thought that had just wormed its way into his mind out of nowhere.
It had been there. For a long time. Ten whole years.
He had just never let himself look at it too closely.
Because if he did - if he let himself really think about it, about how he felt like he was burning alive every time you looked at him like that - it would be too much.
It would consume him.
And he could not, would not, risk this unless he was absolutely sure.
Unless he knew you wanted him too.
Unless he knew you burned for him the same way he was combusting for you in real time in this car.
And that terrified him, because he was not sure.
Because you laughed like it was just funny.
Because you smiled like this was just a conversation.
Because you did not look wrecked.
Not like he felt.
So instead, he cleared his throat, steadied his grip, and forced his voice into something casual, distant - yet still, somehow, not completely backing down. "You think they should have ended up together too, then?"
Not ‘do you think I’m wrong’.
Not ‘do you disagree’.
But  - you think so too.
Like some small, cowardly, pathetic part of him needed to hear you say it.
There was a pause - not a long one, not anything noticeable if he wasn’t paying attention. But he was.
He was paying attention to everything.
To the way your breath hitched just slightly, to the way your fingers twisted at the hem of your sleeve, to the way you turned your head to look at him.
“Obviously.” You gestured toward the radio. “You don’t harmonize so effortlessly with someone you’re just calling a ‘friend.’ That’s literally just denial with extra steps.”
He almost told you that harmonizing perfectly was the entire point of musical theater. That it was scripted, practiced, designed to fit together.
That it didn’t mean anything.
But he didn’t, because he knew what you meant. “So you believe in that?” he asked, voice steady, casual, like this was just another discussion.
You raised an eyebrow. “In what?”
His fingers tapped against the wheel, once, twice – thoughtful - before he finally spoke. "That some people are just... deluding themselves."
The shift was small, but he felt it. Your smile didn’t falter. Your posture didn’t change. But something in your expression - in your eyes specifically - shifted.
It was dangerous, talking to you like this.
Because you noticed too much. Because you understood more than most. Because you saw through things - through people - with a clarity that was often unnerving.
Especially when it came to him.
Especially when he wasn’t sure he was ready to be understood like that.
It was your job, afterall.
"Oh, absolutely," you said easily, your tone way too light for his liking. "People are the most oblivious to themselves. We exist in a perpetual state of contradiction - endlessly chasing clarity while fiercely protecting the illusions that comfort us. We reshape our own realities, bending them to fit the narratives we can live with, refusing to confront the truths that feel too heavy - even when they’re staring right at us."
And didn’t he know - hadn’t he always known - how precise you could be with words in moments like this? The moments where he wasn’t, the only moments where he wasn’t precise at all.
How effortlessly you could thread meaning into silence, weaving it into something he could either acknowledge or ignore.
How your gaze lingered just a fraction too long, like you were offering him a choice.
And he didn’t know whether to turn away from it - or step straight into it.
Because for once, he couldn’t read you and that terrified him.
He had spent his entire life seeing through people, understanding them before they even understood themselves.
Yet here he was, in the quiet of his car, in the space between you, not entirely sure who you were talking about.
And he wasn’t sure if he wanted to know.
So he did what he had always done.
He lived with it.
With the sound of his heart thundering louder than the music - louder than your occasional singing along when something familiar played, or the rhythm of your voice alternating with his as you both filled the car with conversation about everything and nothing.
Each block closer to your apartment building felt like a loss, something slipping through his fingers before he even had the chance to hold onto it. He was already mourning the night before it was over.
And neither of you seemed to want it to end, given how relentlessly the talking continued, stretching time as far as it would allow.
It wasn’t until half an hour later that it even occurred to either of you that you were standing outside in the cold, leaning against the driver’s side door, your arms wrapped around yourself in a futile attempt to keep warm. He was still in the car, window rolled down, engine still running, caught between staying and leaving.
It made him ache, interrupting you mid-sentence to point it out. “You’re shivering,” he said quietly, apologetic, as though he were to blame for the biting chill in the air.
It made him ache even more when, instead of brushing it off or saying goodnight, you invited him upstairs, at how his jacket was discarded somewhere along the short path to your building’s entrance, now draped over your shoulders along with his arm, pulling you closer.
It was ridiculous how, even with two jackets on, the only thing keeping you from freezing was his arm.
What was even more ridiculous - hideous, really - was how he should have been the one freezing, left in nothing but short sleeves, yet somehow, standing there with you wrapped up in him, he’d never felt warmer in his life.
So warm that he didn’t even notice the chill of the night.
So warm, in fact, that he didn’t even need the blanket you handed him when you both settled into your living room, waiting for the heating to kick in. He let it drape over his lap out of politeness more than necessity, as if pretending to care about staying warm.
Now, you sat on opposite ends of your couch, shoes abandoned by the door, both of you leaning on the armrest closest to the other, legs angled toward one another, the space between you steadily narrowing. Distance itself felt like an insult, your arms resting along the back of the couch so you could still face each other, still hold onto the moment that neither of you wanted to let slip away.
And he didn’t dare lose sight of your eyes.
It was in that exact moment that a memory surfaced—some weeks ago, sitting alone in his living room, reading Symposium, a book he only picked up because he had seen you so engrossed in it on the jet. Because he had wanted to understand what had captured your mind so entirely.
And everything that followed - a whole night of texting, deep conversations neither of you ever brought up again, like always.
His eyes had analyzed the book twice, dissected its structure, its meaning. And yet, only now, in the absence of it but in your presence, did he finally understand that one passage.
"And when one of them meets the other half, the actual half of himself… the pair are lost in an amazement of love and friendship and intimacy, and one will not be out of the other's sight, even for a moment."
He understood.
Because he couldn’t look away from you - not now, not ever.
The world outside was so quiet that every word exchanged between you felt magnified, as though the universe itself had leaned in to listen. And when even your whispers felt too loud, you shifted closer, scooching toward him on the couch.
Just a few inches at first.
And then he did the same.
You moved again. Then so did he.
And suddenly, your crossed leg was draped over his, the fabric of your tights brushing against his jeans as naturally as if it had always been there. His left hand settled somewhere near your knee - hesitant, not gripping, but resting. Shy.
The ticking clock on the wall was the only tether to the concept of time, because what he’d assumed to be ten, maybe fifteen minutes revealed itself to be a full hour.
3 A.M. And neither of you seemed to care.
By then, his hand had already found the courage to rest between your thighs, still safely on your knee. Though it didn’t take long before his thumb began moving on its own, tracing slow, idle patterns over the thin fabric of your tights.
He didn’t say anything about the way your foot brushed his calf, or how his name on your lips sounded softer in the early hours. Or at how all of this mutual care betrayed his mind, cracking open a small window to what it could have been.
Yet somehow, it felt far more like a glimpse of what it could be.
“Aaron,” your said, soft enough that it sounded more like a thought than a spoken word.
It wasn’t a question. It wasn’t even a statement. It was just his name. Him.
And somehow, that made it all the more devastating.
You hesitated, your eyes dropping to where his hand rested on your knee. He followed your gaze, and in that moment, even though he’d memorized every fleck of color in your irises, their absence felt like a loss.
So dull that his thumb stilled its movements across your knee under your inspection, as if the simple acknowledgment of the two of you now might shatter everything.
He braced himself for a shift - for the game you always played, where lines were drawn, and walls went back up. Where the closeness between you was something fleeting, fleeting enough to pretend it never existed.
But then, you looked back up.
And instead of retreat, instead of scolding or teasing or anything he expected, there was something else entirely. “I really don’t want this night to end.”
He wasn’t sure he’d heard you right, but the look in your eyes left no room for doubt. You weren’t just talking about the night… and neither was he.
But he didn’t know how to give you the honesty you deserved without completely unraveling, not until his thumb resumed its gentle movements on your knee - more to selfishly steady himself than anything else.
“Neither do I,” he admitted finally, even if each second was daring him to say more, to close the space between you entirely. But he didn’t move. Couldn’t. Not yet.
It was you who moved first.
Plato said that ‘At the touch of love, everyone becomes a poet.”
Maybe he was right, because as your hand slid down his arm, it felt like a verse being written. The way your fingertips barely grazed the surface of his skin, tracing the map of his veins with a tenderness you hadn’t realized you possessed, pretending the warmth under your fingertips didn’t make your stomach tremble, until finally, your touch lingered on his knuckles.
A pause, hesitant. Then, almost instinctively, you laced your fingers with his. It felt... inevitable. Natural in a way that terrified you.
“Didn’t expect you to be this warm,” you murmured, your voice light, almost teasing, though you couldn’t hide the way it trembled.
You finally found the courage to meet his eyes. Hazel. Searching. Devastating.
And you weren’t afraid of what you saw, you already knew. What terrified you was that, with one touch, you might have unraveled something too fragile to survive.
His gaze fell to your joined hands, his thumb gliding softly over the back of yours, speaking in the ineffable language of touch.
“I didn’t expect to feel this… right,” he said, the words so quiet they felt more like a confession than a statement.
The smallest smile tugged at your lips, and you leaned in just a little more. “Aaron…”
And that was it.
Whatever restraint he’d been holding onto slipped away entirely. Before he could overthink it, his hand came to rest against your cheek, his calloused palm cradling the softness of your face.
Gentle. Steady. Tender.
The contrast was almost startling, culminating in the soft whimper that escaped your lips as the cold metal of his watch grazed your neck. And so, apologetically, his thumb began to move, tracing gentle patterns along your cheek, as though committing every curve, every subtle shift, to memory.
You didn’t pull away.
Instead, your hand slid to his wrist, holding him there, your thumb tracing the same delicate patterns along his inner wrist, matching his movements with the same ease that echoed in the way you ordinarily mirrored each other’s posture, each other’s language.
His gaze flickered to your lips. “You have no idea how hard it is to stop myself here,” he just said, now without a hint of regret, not when your eyes searched his with the same intensity he felt pulling at his chest.
“You don’t have to,” you whispered, the words so soft they barely reached him, but he heard them as clearly as if you’d shouted.
His breath came shallow now, his gaze searching yours, as though looking for any sign of hesitation.
But there was none. Only the quiet, unspoken truth reflected back at him.
And so his other hand found your waist, pulling you closer - so close that, without thinking, you moved to straddle him, your knees settled on either side of his hips.
“I-” he stammered, as he looked at you wide-eyed tilting his head back slightly, before shaking his head, a breathless chuckle escaping him.
“Sorry,” you blurted, heat rushing to your face as you realized just how intimate the position you’d claimed truly was – the cruelty of not having even thought about it once before moving, how it was the only way to still communicate with his eyes.
“No,” he said quickly, almost shy, but the way his thumbs brushed your sides betrayed how much he didn’t want you to move. “Don’t apologize. I just wasn’t expecting it...” he trailed off, though you didn’t miss how his gaze flickered to your lips more than once.
“…Are you comfortable?” he asked softly, his eyes wandering across your face.
It wasn’t just a question; it was a moment stretched taut, as if he was buying himself time, wanting to keep this moment balanced on the edge of the razor for just a little longer.
On this space of tenderness, where care outweighed desire, where everything still hung in the balance, where there was still time to hold back, to savor the precipice, waiting for one of you to risk it.
You nodded. “Very.”
The smallest, warmest smile flickered across his lips. “I’m happy you are,” he murmured.
How could he be even so sweet? How could he, in the middle of this - when your body was pressed so close to his - still be so considerate, so cautious, so Aaron?
How could his hands, now steady on your waist, have only settled there after he’d murmured a careful, overly-polite, “May I?”, the formality of it, juxtaposed with the intensity of his touch, was enough to make you giggle.
“Please don’t smile at me like that when you’re this close,” he said, his voice dropping to a low rasp, his gaze fixed on your lips.
You couldn’t help but grin wider. “Why not?” your fingers brushing lightly against his jaw.
“Because,” he began, his lips twitching up, “it makes me forget how to think.”
Crazy, really. The idea that Aaron Hotchner, the most precise and methodical man you’d ever met, could forget how to think. Thinking was practically the core of his being, wasn’t it?
Cogito, ergo sum. I think, therefore I am.
Because if forgetting how to think meant losing himself, then you were the cause. You had undone him.
Shaken the core of a man who had carved his entire existence around reason – or at least, tried to fool everyone into thinking so. And now, here he was - disarmed by nothing more than a smile, a touch, and the mere proximity of your lips.
If existence is rooted in thought, and Aaron’s thoughts were consumed entirely by you, did that mean his existence was yours to hold? Did that mean, right now, he existed only because you allowed him to? Couldn’t be that.
Still, how dizzying it was to consider how quickly you’d become his undoing – yet, perhaps what was even more terrifying was the way he seemed to welcome it.
“You’re not wrong,” he murmured, his voice quiet but steady, like a confession meant just for you. His dark eyes searched yours, their intensity almost overwhelming. “You do undo me.”
Your breath caught. “How did you even manage-”
But he didn’t let you finish. His forehead pressed softly against yours, his nose brushing yours in the faintest of touches.
And so your eyes closed together, as if the nearness alone was too much to bear, especially when his lips hovered so close that you could feel the warmth of his breath.
How paradoxical it was that you both desperately craved each other’s mouths, yet now, in this unbearable closeness, neither of you could summon the courage to take the last step.
How you continued lingering in the tension, your breaths mingling, your bodies pressed so close that those strong hands of his, still firmly on your waist, urged you even further onto him.
Neither of you wanted to bear the responsibility of what came next. What was about to happen. What was meant to happen. It wasn’t a game anymore. You were done waiting.
You wanted him. Now.
You were ready - to let it all go.
“Aaron,” you whispered, looking into him.
And as always, he seemed to be the only one who understood you, he began to trail kisses across your face, soft, slowly, taking his time.
Your temple.
The side of your right eye.
The curve of your cheek.
Down to your jawline.
Then, he traced his way back up, planting one final kiss at the very edge of your mouth.
When he pulled back, intoxicated, his eyes found yours - wet, shining, unguarded, just like his.
“Please, ask me to stop,” he whispered, his voice breaking, his eyes already glistening with unshed tears.
“Aaron, I can’t,” you murmured, the words trembling on your lips as your breath mingled with his, the space between you growing thinner with every passing second.
The moment.
How do you measure a moment like this?
One tick of the clock. Two tears slipping free from both of you. Three uneven heartbeats, each louder than the last.
And then, finally, he closed the distance.
You should have probably expected that your first kiss would taste like salt, the tears trailing down your faces mingling somewhere in between and masking the real sweetness of it. How the flavor of each other’s mouths was obscured, just as you’d both hidden your true feelings for so long.
It was so cruel in its irony, yet somehow, it fit so perfectly that neither of you could bring yourselves to care.
Because his lips were too soft against yours for your own good, the gentleness of his hand gripping the nape of your neck pulling you closer, while the other rested against your tear-streaked cheek, damp from both the lingering press of his lips moments before and your tears.
When he finally pulled back, it wasn’t to retreat - it was to cradle your face, his thumbs brushing away the tears that wouldn’t stop falling, even as his own streamed freely, unchecked.
And as much as you wanted to keep going, to lose yourself in the solace of his mouth, something greater pulled you both in.
Without hesitation, you collapsed into each other’s arms, clutching tightly as though the world around you was slipping away, tears soaking into the other’s shoulders.
Was it penance? For realizing too late how simple this could have been? For all the wasted years, the missed chances, and the pain endured in silence?
Or was it just acceptance -that only now were you both ready to bear the weight of this, to hold each other completely, to disappear into one another?
Maybe that was the point.
Because in that embrace, unplanned and unbidden, came a feeling so familiar it ached.
That same resonance in your chest, the same connection of that first time you ever held him like this, nine years ago in your old apartment, when his walls cracked just enough to let you in.
And so the memory bleeds into the present, and it’s almost unbearable how much has stayed the same, and yet, how utterly everything has changed.
That stupid Hegel wasn’t wrong: the synthesis always becomes a new thesis, a cycle repeating itself. The moment was reborn, again and again, every time.
But damn, how it changed with every turn.
The same, yet entirely different.
The weight of then. The depth of now.
It was all there, in that fleeting, aching embrace. Not just holding on to each other, but to every version of yourselves that had come before - and every one still waiting in the future.
Even as the moment began to fade, as you pulled back - both drawn by the undeniable hunger to find each other’s mouths again - the synthesis was already shifting, reshaping into something new.
Another storm, another struggle, another antithesis loomed ahead, but always, always, the cycle reached for a new synthesis. And Hegel, damn him, was right again.
The cycle never ends.
But neither, it seemed, did you.
Competing with each other, as always.
Neither of you willing to back down, both so eager to claim the other that it became impossible to tell who started the second kiss, it just… happened.
This time, there was no softness, no hesitation - just urgency. Your hands tangled in the back of his hair, pulling him closer, keeping him right where you wanted him, while his hands gripped your lower back.
The moment your lips parted, offering him the faintest invitation, he deepened the kiss without even thinking it twice. His tongue slid against yours with so much hunger you were intoxicated, only for you to interrupt with a sharp bite to his bottom lip.
He growled at the challenge, he had to one-up you, returning the favor by sinking his teeth into your jawline, as if to stake his claim all over again, a sound so low and primal it seemed to vibrate straight into your skin, making you gasp and tighten your hold on him even more, eager to hear it again.
Damn him and his competitiveness.
You couldn’t help but meet it head-on, your hands roaming over the taut muscles of his back, feeling every shift, every flex as he moved against you.
He broke away briefly, not to stop, but to catch his breath as his lips found new territory. From your mouth to your jaw, and then down to your neck, your head tilting back reflexively, granting him even more access.
He smiled against your skin, insufferable even now, and when his lips returned to yours, that grin only widened. You kissed him again and again, but since his stupid smile kept getting in the way, you ended up kissing his teeth more than once.
Damn him.
And yet, you found yourself smiling like a fool, because how could you not? There was no way you could be making him feel this way, yet here you were - both of you lost in it, pushing and pulling, both refusing to surrender.
The more you had of each other, the more you wanted, never satisfied, never close enough, as though the only way to end this ache was to somehow crawl into each other’s skin.
And so, blame the position.
Blame the dress you’d chosen tonight, skimming your thighs, leaving so little to the imagination as it rode up with every shift against him.
Blame the way your kisses had shifted, growing hungrier, messier, more tongue than lips, more heavy breathing than words.
Or blame his new-found obsession to place wet kisses on the spot just behind your ear just to hear you gasp, while he had the audacity to hum into your neck, utterly satisfied with himself, like he was savoring your every reaction to the exquisite work of his mouth.
Blame his body, the way he pressed against you, his hands sliding from your waist to your hips, then lower, settling on your ass with a grip that didn’t make the things any easier.
Blame the way his growing bulge rubbed against you through the rough fabric of his jeans, the friction hitting exactly where the ache was blooming, pulling shudders from deep inside you.
Blame all of it - the kisses, the position, the maddening press of his body against yours - because it only made you more desperate.
The carnal realization of just how badly you wanted him, left you unable to stop. Your hips moved instinctively, grinding against his hardness, the rhythm of your kisses syncing with the desperate roll of your bodies.
Thank God his jeans were dark, because you were sure by now your arousal was leaving its mark on him, soaking into the fabric, leaving evidence of just how far gone you were – and if he noticed, if he felt it, the way his grip tightened on your waist told you he didn’t care.
If anything, it spurred him on, pulling you closer, holding you tighter, neither of you could stop moving.
The worst part? You didn’t want to. Not even a little.
What was even worse than this? The fact that Aaron, ever the master of timing, felt the need to comment on the obvious.
“You know what you’re doing, don’t you?” he asked breathless, lips flushed and slightly swollen from yours.
No shit, Sherlock.
You didn’t hesitate. “Aaron, do I look like I don’t know exactly what I’m doing?”
That even managed to earn a chuckle from him – speaking of victories - “Just… wanted to make sure you’re alright with this pace. We’re not exactly taking it slow, you know?!” he rasped, as his hands slid up and down the sides of your hips.
No shit, Sherlock, part two.
Was he worrying about you or himself?
You tilted your head, searching his face, the faint crease in his brow, the way his eyes softened as soon as they were met with yours. “Aaron,” you cupped his cheek. “Do you want to take it slow instead?”
Shit. What if you’d misread him? What if this hesitation wasn’t about concern for you but second thoughts about the entire thing? You hated yourself. How could you even think that-
“Not really,” he admitted, his lips curving into the most kissable smile. “I just… don’t want you to regret this. I’d wait forever if you asked me to, but right now…” His words faltered, his gaze dropping to your lips. “Right now, I don’t think I can. But only if you want it too.”
Oh God, how considerate he was.
Oh God, how much you never trusted anyone as him, how safe did he make you feel, how it almost brought tears to your eyes because you’d forgotten what it felt like to be looked at, cared for, wanted like this.
Oh God, how much you didn’t want to respond with words, to just take his hand, guide it between your legs, and let him feel exactly how much you needed him.
But words it was, then.
“I do, Aaron,” you said, taking his hands in yours. “I don’t think I’ve ever been more sure of anything. I want this. I want you. But…” Your lips curled up. “Not on my couch. Could we maybe hold out until the bedroom?”
Ah, yes. Turning 30 had officially made you someone who prioritized the longevity of their furniture over their sex life.
How responsible.
How tragic.
And yet, neither of you moved. It took a second - or two, or three - for both of you to gather the energy to even try standing after spending what felt like an eternity tangled up on your poor, overworked second-hand couch…
…a poor overworked second-hand. Hm. Now there was a pattern.
You hated yourself a little for how evil the thought was. Poor couch, poor him.
Not that it wasn’t true. But still - evil.
Still nearly as evil as the absolute disaster you’d made of his hair with your hands while you were making out. A fitting match for the flush on his face and the state of his half-untucked polo, which you’d been yanking at so fervently it was a miracle it hadn’t come off entirely.
Speaking of things you couldn’t stop noticing, the sight before you now was definitely a huge… huge walk with him to your bedroom. Because surely your hallway hadn’t been this long before.
Or maybe he was thinking the same thing, because just as you reached the doorway to your bedroom, he turned you, your back pressing against the wall before you even had time to push the door open.
You didn’t expect him to be this passionate – and desperate, when his mouth was back on yours, claiming you in a kiss so hot and wet it that the wetness surely wasn’t exactly isolated to your mouth at all.
You gasped, caught completely off guard, and that was apparently all the invitation he needed to slip his tongue deeper into your mouth, tasting you, claiming you, and it was so good that you barely managed to catch your breath, let alone remember the damn bedroom door.
“Aaron-” you managed between breathless kisses, barely stringing the words together.
As if you could talk.
As if you could pretend to hold any moral high ground here when your leg was already wrapping around his waist, pulling him closer. And oh, he was there - all of him. Thick, hard, and pressing against you.
He groaned into your mouth as his hands slid lower, gripping a handful of your ass, “I know,” he muttered, his voice rasping against your skin. “I know. The door.”
Oh, but why did his voice have to sound like that - so low, so wrecked… so unfair.
Anyway, the door.
Not that it mattered, apparently, because he didn’t move. His lips found your neck, kissing and nipping at the sensitive skin there, as his hands kneaded the flesh of your ass like he couldn’t get enough.
“You’re not exactly working on it,” you managed to gasp, and oh, you were so proud of yourself for having the strength to bicker with him even now, even like this.
Of course, Aaron, being Aaron, couldn’t resist biting back.
You felt the curve of his lips against your neck, he chuckled as his teeth grazed the hollow of your throat. “Well,” he murmured, returning to nip at your earlobe. “What about you?”
The man was infuriating. And hot. And so completely overwhelming you could barely think straight.
“I’m very busy right now,” you managed to counter, though what you really meant was that your back was far too occupied arching into him, practically begging for more.
At least he somehow found the self-control to pull back after what you could most graciously describe as an obscene amount of very enthusiastic dry humping. You were both so doomed. His hands steadied you just long enough for him to fumble for the doorknob.
And then the second you crossed the threshold, all bets were off.
His lips - no, his mouth - were on yours again, the kiss so heated it was more teeth and tongue than finesse. Probably because it hit you both at the same time - the realization of just how painfully simple it would be to strip the other bare.
His polo? A quick tug away from being tossed aside. Your dress? One little zipper stood between it and the floor. No barriers. No obstacles. That was all it would take.
And it was as if he read your mind because without a word, his hands found your waist and spun you around, pulling you back against him.
You barely had time to gasp before his head dipped to your neck, as his fingers found the zipper of your dress way too easily without even having to look. Just before he moved it, he paused. “I might’ve left a mark.”
Oh no, what a pity…
“Make it two,” you whispered, your voice trembling as your hand slid into his hair, pressing his head right where you wanted it.
And because Aaron apparently took instructions very well when they suited him, he bit down, his teeth grazing your skin just enough to make you shiver, the sharpness of it immediately soothed by the warm drag of his tongue.
The sound you made was embarrassing - breathless and high-pitched – that only seemed to spur him on, since in less than a second, the dress was pooling at your feet, leaving you bare save for your tights and underwear.
Mismatched underwear.
A good lace bra - at least there was that - with the most comfortable white cotton grandma pants you could have pulled from the depths of a multipack that were, by how the things have been going now, almost certainly transparent. Perfect.
Not that any of this was supposed to happen, of course.
You hadn’t exactly planned on getting laid by your… what even was he? Your best friend? Your boss?
An objectively gorgeous man with dark eyes that burned into you, whose voice could make your knees completely weak? The person you’d been quietly, stubbornly, and stupidly in sexual tension hell with for a decade?
He was all of that. He was none of that. He was Aaron, and whatever Aaron Hotchner was to you, you hadn’t planned on getting laid tonight. Or this morning. Or whatever ungodly hour it was now.
But plans didn’t seem to matter anymore.
Not when his hands were sliding over your body like you were something he’d wanted for so long that touching you now felt like the only thing keeping him tethered to reality.
Not when his lips found yours again, claiming them in a way that made you wonder how either of you had ever survived without tasting each other.
And certainly not when the moment your back hit the mattress of your bed, his full weight pressing into you fully, how your legs opened instinctively, welcoming him, pulling him closer, your body arching into him like it was chasing something only he could soothe.
He pulled back just enough to look at you, his eyes dark and heavy-lidded, scanning your face like he was trying to memorize every detail. “God, you’re so beautiful,” he said softly, his voice rough but sincere.
“God, you’re so clothed,” you shot back without thinking, your quick wit betraying you yet again, unsure whether to curse yourself for ruining the moment or to thank your sarcasm for always wanting to keep things… balanced.
But instead of appreciating your humor or giving you the satisfaction of stripping him, the insufferable man had the audacity to bypass your comment entirely.
With a swift motion, his hand reached behind you, unclasped your bra, and tossed it somewhere into the abyss of the room without so much as a second glance.
You blinked, momentarily stunned, a flush creeping up your neck at the brazenness of it. “I was referring to you, Hotchner.”
“Eventually,” he murmured, his lips brushing yours before capturing them again in a kiss that effectively cut off any protest you might’ve had. Clever man.
And so he started his descent, a study in patience, still hopelessly romantic about it, as if the situation weren’t already infuriating. Because even though you knew for sure he could feel the way your nipples had hardened against him, he still took his time.
Kissing his way down your throat, spending far too long mapping out the curve of your collarbone with his mouth, fingers just hovering - like he wasn’t already touching you everywhere.
And then, finally, his hands moved. Possessively. His palms covered your breasts, kneading them in a way that sent sparks ricocheting through you, his lips pressing a single, scorching kiss right in the middle of your sternum.
That did it. That had your thighs clenching on instinct, a desperate attempt to manage the growing fire low in your belly.
But you refused to let a sound escape.
Oh no. You weren’t about to give him that satisfaction. Especially not when he got to enjoy the full view of you laid out beneath him while you were left with only the delicious flex of his biceps.
Biceps, which, while spectacular, were not the bare expanse of his back. Not the firm ridges of muscle you knew were under that godforsaken polo, the one thing keeping things uneven between you.
He seemed to catch on to the game you were playing, though, because without warning, his mouth closed over one of your nipples, his tongue swirling over the sensitive peak so perfectly that it had your breath catching in your throat.
At the same time, his fingers found the other, pinching, rolling, teasing - the combination so damn lethal when paired with the languid flicks of his tongue, sending shocks straight to your clit.
Still, you bit your lip, stubbornly holding back the sounds he so clearly wanted to pull from you, even if the ache between your thighs was unbearable now - a dull, insistent throb that begged, no, pleaded for attention.
Attention that the insufferable man was withholding.
Or, unlike you, he simply didn’t want to rush… damn him. He was making it impossible to keep up the charade.
Because every flick of that damned talented mouth of his - now moving onto your other breast - every brush of his fingers, every sound he made against your skin that revealed just how hungry he was of your flesh, was undoubtedly designed to unravel you, piece by piece.
Every piece, that is, except for your poor, neglected, throbbing clit.
And of course, he was enjoying every second of it. Smug bastard.
“You know,” he murmured against your skin, his lips still grazing your nipple, “sounds are appreciated.” …Oh, fuck him.
“So is nudity,” you managed to snap, though your voice trembled, betraying just how close you were to falling apart.
He stilled. Lifted his head just enough to meet your gaze. And then he smirked.
Ah. That smirk. Never a good sign.
Especially not when paired with the way his hands started working your tights down - so slowit was almost unbearable. Always careful, always considerate Aaron. But God, right now, you wanted him ripping them off you.
His gaze swept over you, his eyes instantly darkened as they dettled on the on the damp patch at the center of your underwear.
“You’re soaked,” he murmured, his voice dipping lower, rougher, as his thumb grazed over the edge of the fabric.
Before you could process how pleased he was with himself, he spread your legs further, settling himself between them. His fingers dug into the soft flesh of your thighs, pinning you down, and he started trailing kisses along your inner thigh.
From the knee.
Oh, come on.
Still, you hissed at the contact, at the way his mouth devoured your thighs like he was savoring every inch of them.
Like this, this was what he lived for. Worshipping you.
And the way his lips moved, how drunk he looked as he worked his way upward, kissing, sucking, biting - just enough to make you twitch, the way his breath shook when he exhaled against your thigh - it only made it worse.
The closer he got, the more impossible it became to hold back the sounds slipping from your lips.
And then - one last kiss, right there, where your thigh met your core.
“Fuck, you’re so wet,” he murmured, and before you could even think about responding, his tongue flicked out, tasting the arousal that had trailed up to where his mouth lingered.
Oh. What a whore.
“You’re such a who-” you began, but the words barely escaped before he bit down lightly on your clothed clit, sharp enough to send a jolt through your entire body and rip a strangled cry from your throat.
Your reaction must have been exactly what he wanted, because his fingers replaced his teeth immediately, pressing against you through the thin, damp fabric.
“Oh, there you are,” he murmured, dragging his fingers down the length of your slit. “For a second, I thought I wasn’t doing it right.”
You scoffed, or at least you tried to. The sound barely made it past your lips before breaking into another sharp, breathless cry as his fingers rode back up, pressing against your clit in slow circles, the cotton barrier dulling the sensation just enough to drive you insane.
One, two, three strokes - then you stopped counting, too caught up in the feeling of him until he finally tossed the fabric aside, making you feel the cool air against the wet heat of your core, but he didn’t move.
Didn’t touch.
Just -
"You're a goddess."
He stared for so long that you started to wonder if he was waiting for you to say please, some kind of power play. 
Your lips curled slightly as you lifted your chin. "If you think I’m going to beg you now, Hotchner, I’m absolutely not.
Apparently, you had never been more wrong in your life.
Because his head snapped up so fast it was almost comical - except for the way his entire face flushed. Not just with arousal - well, yes, definitely with arousal - but with something else.
The way his mouth parted slightly before he swallowed, his throat bobbing, his gaze flicking away for half a second like he had to collect himself, undoubtedly made you think-
"I was actually…" he cleared his throat, "asking for permission."
Oh. Oh. Apparently, someone couldn’t hide being a bottom for more than a few minutes.
Aaron ‘Attitude’ Hotchner? Gone. Reduced to sheepish glances and waiting for permission like a damn Victorian gentleman the second he actually looked at your cunt.
Hilarious.
"You have it," you murmured.
That was delicious.
And because he was so whipped, he didn’t just dive in immediately. No. Of course not. He had to come all the way back up first, had to kiss you before anything else.
And then he was gone. Gone from your mouth, gone from your chest, gone from anywhere but exactly where you wanted him most.
The very first swipe of his tongue across your folds obliterated any coherent thought, reduced your world to this - to the wet heat of his mouth, to the steady press of his hands holding you open, to the obscene sounds of him devouring you.
There was nothing but him, the way his tongue curled against you, the way his lips closed around your clit with just the right amount of pressure, the way his name tumbled from your lips and melted into the deep, guttural moan he let out as he first tasted you.
And honestly, you couldn’t decide what was hotter - the way his sounds came in perfect harmony with your own cries, or the fact that he was so vocal while eating you out, like it brought him just as much pleasure as it did you.
And it probably did.
Because he lapped at your dripping cunt like a man starved, frantic, desperate, moving with such a hunger that made your fingers dig into his hair, gripping tight like you could somehow hold on to reality through him.
But he didn’t want space. Didn’t need it. If anything, he leaned in further, groaning low against your soaked, swollen cunt, letting you drip down his chin as if he loved the way your arousal was entirely coating his flushed face.
Loved being drenched in you. Loved ruining himself on you.
“Aaron-” your voice broke, your hips jerking up into him, needy. “God, your tongue is unreal.”
And oh, he heard you, loud and clear.
Because his immediate response? Teeth. A quick, sharp graze of his teeth against your clit, followed by a suction so deep, so overwhelming, it ripped a scream straight from your throat.
Fuck him.
“Your-your mouth is unreal,” you stammered, correcting yourself, because apparently, he wasn’t letting you off the hook without acknowledging his full range of talents.
Smiling against your skin - as if it wasn’t blatantly obvious that he had a praise kink, too.
“Sorry,” he said with a kiss to your inner thigh as his thumb kept working on your clit. “I just thought you were a thorough one, Professor.”
What a whore.
“Oh, fuck you for calling me ‘Professor’ like it doesn’t turn you on just to say it,” you shot back.
 “Oh, it does,” he admitted with no shame whatsoever. “I just wish you could feel how much.” His gaze flicked down, daring you to follow it - to the thick, aching bulge straining against his pants, so hard it had to hurt, so obvious it made you clench around nothing.
How cruel of him.
“Keep talking to me like that, Aaron, and I’ll crush your head with my thighs,” you warned, voice shaking, hands fisting into the sheets because he was still teasing, still circling with his thumb instead of putting his damn mouth back where you needed it most.
“Please do,” he said.
And then he gave you exactly what you wanted. His tongue plunged into you, pushing past the unbearable emptiness, giving you something to clench around, something to grind against, something to drown in.
And because he was, apparently, crafted to be the most infuriatingly perfect thing to ever exist - his nose pressed against your clit with every movement, sending white-hot jolts of pleasure through you so intense your legs tried to snap shut around his head.
He was faster. Stronger. Hands tightening against your thighs, keeping them spread as he pressed you further, pinning you down so he could devour you properly. And when your thighs twitched again, reflexive, desperate-
"Stay open for me."
That awful, awful sound. That little flick of his tongue against his teeth, a wordless tsk of disapproval - he did it every time, every single time, and it should have pissed you off but instead, shot straight through you, coiling low in your belly, leaving you breathless, made you arch into his mouth, made you-
"Still, please," he growled, more desperate now, fingers tightening like the control freak he so obviously was. Apparently, the man simply could not function if his so-called work space wasn’t perfectly in order.
Some things never changed.
“You’re such a hypocrite, it was-” Your breath caught on another roll of his tongue, hips jerking up against his face. “It was you who begged me to-”
"Mm," he hummed against you like he was thinking about it, his mouth hot and slick as he pressed deeper, let his tongue flatten. "And?"
…And then his lips closed around you, sucking just right, and you broke. You felt it coiling, tighter, tighter, low deep in your stomach.
"Aaron, I'm so close."
"I got you," he murmured, suddenly warm, suddenly gentle - because despite all the arrogance, the smug little smirks, he was nothing but a softie. All bark, no bite. Well… except for the other kinds of bites. "Don’t worry. Let go."
Then his tongue flicked - once, twice… and you were gone.
Shattered apart, trembling beneath his mouth, your fingers tangled in his hair, yanking, desperate. The pleasure hit sharp and fast, so intense it almost hurt, your muscles locking up as wave after wave crashed through you.
But he didn’t stop. Not until you’d come on his face just one more time.
So his tongue was back on you before you could even recover, dragging you higher, keeping you there, refusing to let you go. His mouth was relentless, but his fingers - God, his fingers.
How many times had you daydreamed about them? How many nights had you imagined the way they’d feel sinking inside you, stretching you open, fucking you deep and slow until you couldn’t think?
A reasonable number of times. That’s what you told yourself.
So it only made sense that you were impatient now, desperate to feel them inside you instead of just ghosting along your soaked folds, teasing, tracing, dipping in just enough to have you thinking, finally -
Only for him to pull away again, just as fast.
“Need some help finding it, Hotchner?” you bit out breathlessly, your voice dripping with sarcasm despite the whimper it ended on. “Don’t be embarrassed. I can guide you if-”
Before you could finish, one thick finger thrust deep inside you, cutting off your words with a strangled moan.
“I think I’ve got it,” he said smugly… oh, he definitely did.
The stretch of just one finger had you reeling, but then he added a second without hesitation, the fullness making you gasp. Two of his fingers felt like three of yours, stretching you perfectly, pressing against spots you didn’t even know existed.
“Fuck, Aaron,” you moaned, gripping the sheets as he started to move faster, stroking that perfect spot again and again until your vision blurred.
“You like that?” he asked, his voice so low and rough that made your toes curl, unable to respond if not with a whimper.
“Yeah, you do,” he murmured, his lips brushing your thigh as his fingers curled deeper, pressed just right, dragging a broken moan from your lips, his own voice dark with approval. "God, you’re so wet."
Your cheeks burned because well, wasn’t he right?!
The evidence of it was everywhere - slicking his fingers, his hand, his face, and the way he said it, so casually, like he was just stating a fact, only made the heat in your belly coil tighter.
"Damn, you’re so fucking good," you gasped between shattered breaths.
“Mm, so is this cunt,” he shot back between licks, groaning as he felt you flutter around his fingers.
What a dirty, dirty mouth. And damn, if he did he put it to use.
It didn’t take long. Barely a few more thrusts of his fingers into your slick, throbbing cunt, barely a few more drags of his tongue against your clit - before he had you unraveling completely.
Your body seized, back arching clean off the bed, a sharp, helpless cry ripping from your throat as you came so hard you almost sobbed.
He didn’t stop.
His fingers kept fucking into you, curling just right, stroking deep, drawing out every last shudder, every last desperate moan. His tongue never left your clit, flicking, sucking, keeping you there, forcing you to take every wave, every aftershock, dragging you through it until your thighs trembled around his head, until you were whimpering, pleading, too overstimulated to handle another second.
Only then did he finally pull away, lips gliding up your body, dragging sticky, open-mouthed kisses along your stomach, your ribs, your breasts, until his weight was pressing you into the mattress again, until you were surrounded by him, the scent of sex thick in the air, his mouth still hot and wet against your skin.
"God, you’re a fucking vision when you come," he murmured, voice husky, lips brushing over your jaw as his hand slid up to cradle your face.
And then he kissed you.
Deep, filthy, his tongue sweeping into your mouth without hesitation, letting you taste yourself on him, letting you feel the slick mess he’d made of you, the evidence of how thoroughly he had devoured you.
Romanticism truly was dead.
“Still too clothed,” you whispered, voice low, teasing, as your fingers trailed from his jaw down to his chest, nails scratching lightly over the fabric of his polo, feeling the heat of him beneath it. Annoyingly in the way.
“You’re very welcome to change that now,” he huffed, smirking, giving you another quick, teasing kiss, the barest brush of his lips over yours.
Who were you to refuse?
Your hands moved swiftly, gripping the hem of his shirt and tugging it up, over his head, before tossing it somewhere behind you - who cared where? That would be his problem in a few hours anyways.
And oh damn-
If you thought the polo highlighted his frame, without it he looked absolutely massive. His chest, his shoulders, the way his muscles shifted beneath his skin - it was almost unfair how goodlooking he was.
You leaned in to kiss him, letting your fingers roam all over him - probably lingering a little too long on those broad, perfect shoulders. Honestly, you were doing your best not to bite them.
Mostly. A little nip didn’t count, right? Surely it was allowed. To test. It wasn’t your fault they looked like they could carry the weight of the world - and you - without breaking a sweat. But of course, he couldn’t know that. He couldn’t know that his shoulders alone were making you go feral.
So you distracted him the best way you knew how - your lips pressing against his neck, soft at first, teasing, before nipping lightly at his pulse point, teeth scraping just enough to earn you a sharp inhale.
Still, even as your lips worked to keep him occupied, your thoughts betrayed you.
You were sure you’d implode the moment you saw his back - the way those muscles would shift and flex. Just the thought of it had your pulse racing. Thankfully, he was still facing you, so you had a little more time to live. But not much, considering the way your mind still found a way to betray you.
Because now all you could picture was his weight on top of you, pressing you into the mattress, pinning you down with no way out. Now all you could feel was the phantom stretch of him, the way he’d fill-
Right. His jeans. Still in the way. Still ruining your life.
You swallowed hard, forcing your hands to move lower, fumbling with his belt and zipper. If your hands trembled, you’d blame it on how hard you were trying not to stare at the thick bulge beneath the denim. Trying being the keyword, because at this point - you weren’t better than a man.
His jeans hit the floor, leaving him in just his boxers, making it quite difficult to ignore the outline of him anymore - thick, hard, already straining against the fabric, the damp spot at the tip teasing at just how ready he was.
Your pulse pounded in your ears as you glanced up, silently asking if you could take things further. He gave a small nod, his eyes dark and heavy-lidded, and that was all the encouragement you needed.
Your hands turned momentarily shy as you hooked your fingers into the band, slowly tugging them down. He sprang free, thick and hard, flushed at the tip, already glistening with slick arousal, and God, you swore your mouth went dry and then wet all in the span of a heartbeat.
You couldn’t stop yourself from murmuring, “God,” as your fingers wrapped around him, thumb brushing over the swollen, leaking head, smearing the wetness there, spreading it over the burning skin.
The reaction was immediate.
His head tipped back, his grip on your hips tightening, trying hard not to just rut into your fist like some desperate, touch-starved needy thing. But he was trembling , his self-control fraying one slow stroke at a time as you worked him over, your fingers squeezing around the slick head before dragging back down his length.
"Fuck," he muttered, the sound wrecking you, shooting straight between your legs.
“You’re so-” you started, but the words failed you. What could you even say? You were too distracted by the weight of him in your hand, the way he twitched against your palm and the way the thick vein along his shaft throbbed with every stroke of your hand.
All you knew was that you wanted him in your mouth. Wanted to drag your tongue along that vein, wanted to feel the heavy weight of him on your tongue, wanted to take him down until tears pricked the corners of your eyes. The need burned in your gut, tight and relentless, but still, it wasn’t enough. Because as much as your mouth ached for him, the fire between your thighs was worse. So much worse.
“Aaron,” you breathed, voice shaking as you looked up at him, your fingers still wrapped around his cock, still stroking him, enjoying the way his chest rose and fell with every movement of your hand.
His eyes - dark, heavy-lidded - met yours, his breath coming uneven, jagged, as he rasped, desperate, "Take whatever you want."
“I want you.”
Aaron groaned, his lips twitching into something that might have been a smile if he wasn’t so wrecked with desire. “Come here,” he murmured, as he leaned down and kissed you. And God, what a kiss.
Before you knew it, he had you back on the bed, his body hovering over yours, his broad shoulders framing your view of him. He settled himself between your legs, his mouth moving to your jaw, then down to your neck, at the point there was no doubt in a few hours you’d wear a turtleneck to work.
Still, he paused, hovering just above you, his lips brushing against yours as he asked one more time, “Are you sure?”
At this point, if you weren’t aching for him, you might’ve had the patience to be sarcastic. Something like, No, actually, I’m not sure. Let’s both get dressed again and see if that helps.
“Aaron, I’m literally begging you,” you said, exasperated, though you didn’t miss the glint in his eyes – if he just wanted you to beg him he could have simply asked. You would have never said it out loud but at least he could have tried…
“Just making sure,” he said so softly his voice seemed even deeper than it already was, but his hand slid between your legs, fingers gliding through your folds, and the way he groaned when he felt how wet you were made you shudder.
“God, you’re soaked,” he muttered, almost to himself, as if confirming what he already knew.
You didn’t think it was possible to be more turned on, but apparently, Aaron Hotchner could always prove you wrong.
And ever the hopeless romantic - because apparently, he was so much of a kisser - he kissed you again. It wasn’t fair, honestly, how good he was at this, how much intention he poured into every press of his lips , every flick of his tongue, every sharp little pull at your bottom lip that had your hips rolling up against him. It was infuriating.
"I’m on the pill," you gasped between kisses, cutting straight to the point because at this rate, you were about two seconds away from losing your mind.
"Good," he murmured, his lips ghosting over yours again. "That’s good."
Of course it’s good, Aaron. As if you were trying to create another insufferable Hotchner. One man who could argue his way out of anything was already more than enough for the world.
He shifted, aligning himself at your entrance, the thick head of his cock pressing against you, dragging through your slick folds with just the slightest roll of his hips. The stretch, even in just the promise of it, had you gasping into his mouth.
“Tell me if it’s too much,” he rasped, his forehead pressing against yours, still searching for any sign of hesitation. Classic Aaron.
And because he was Aaron, of course he kissed you again, stealing what little breath you had left as he began to push inside.
Holy fucking-
Your nails dug into his shoulders as he filling you inch by inch, his cock sinking in with a slow, thick glide that made your head tilt back into the pillow, your mouth falling open as sounds escaped your lips - a moan, then a gasp, and a whimper.
When he bottomed out, buried to the hilt, so deep you swore you could feel him in your stomach, you swore you might break, and you loved every second of it. How the hell did he even feel this good?
"Jesus Christ," he gritted out, breath hot against your jaw.
He paused, his cock throbbing inside you as he let you adjust, his lips ghosting over your jawline with kisses so soft they felt almost reverent, as though the slight ache of the stretch was something he needed to apologize for.
“God, you’re so tight.”
You involuntarily clenched down around him in response, "Fucking Christ," he groaned, his forehead dropping to yours for a moment. “You’re going to kill me.”
And fuck, if the second he started moving you weren’t utterly determined to hear every name of every deity from his long-lost religion tumble from his lips, as long as it meant he kept thrusting so deep inside you – making your breath catch from the mere drag of him pulling his entire length out before pushing it back in.
“Fuck Aaron, you feel so good,” you gasped, your hands tightening on his biceps.
And damn him, because he loved it - loved your praise so much that a low chuckle rumbled in his chest, even as his breath came uneven, ragged. “Fuck, you look so beautiful from here,”
He leaned in, his hips still moving, his lips brushing against yours just enough for you to feel the heat of his breath, to taste the promise of his kiss. “You’re perfect,” he whispered, making your legs wrap around his waist, pulling him closer, needing him deeper.
The shift in angle made his next thrust hit you in a way that tore a cry from your lips. He must’ve felt it - the way your body tightened around him, the way your nails sank into the strong muscles of his back, leaving red lines in their wake - because his pace quickened, each thrust better than the last.
And damn it if he didn’t fuck you so good.
“Right there,” you gasped, arching your back as the head of his cock hit that spot “Oh, Aaron-”
“God, I love how you say my name,” he rasped, his forehead dropping to yours as he planted a kiss on your temple between thrusts.
Sweat beaded on his forehead, dampening the dark, thick strands of his hair that clung to his face, his brows furrowed all concentrated, his cheeks flushed, jaw tight, and God, if he wasn’t the most beautiful thing you’d ever seen.
How stupid, how utterly reckless, it was to feel yourself falling for him all over again. And not just falling - but plummeting, freefalling into the abyss of him. Exactly now, exactly like this - when he was buried so deep inside you that it felt like he was carving himself into your soul.
How shallow, how ridiculous, to let your pupils blow wide with hunger, to let your chest ache with something too tender, too raw, while your body burned for him like this.
Because it wasn’t just the way his hips buckled into yours, wasn’t just the rhythm of his thrusts, wasn’t just the stretch and fullness that made you gasp. No, it was the way his name tumbled from your lips like it was the only word you knew, and the way he rasped your name back, hoarse and desperate, like it was his prayer.
The wet slap of his hips meeting yours, the creak of the bed beneath you - it was way too loud for the early hours, you knew that. Too wild, too shameless, probably waking every neighbor you had, giving them the privilege of hearing his name tumble from your lips and yours from his.
But how could you care? How could you even think about anything beyond him, especially when he shifted suddenly, leaning back and lifting your legs over his shoulders?
“Like this,” he muttered, his voice rough and breathless. His hands gripped your thighs, steady, holding you in place as he adjusted himself, his cock driving deeper - God, how was it even possible to feel this full?
His next thrust stole the breath from your lungs, and the one after that made your vision blur, leaving you gripping the sheets, then the bedframe, his arms - anything you could reach.
“I got you,” he rasped, his tone softer now, and if it weren’t for the fact that he was absolutely wrecking you, you might’ve laughed at how he said it. So casual, so reassuring, like he wasn’t currently fucking you out of your mind.
And then, just to make sure you were well and truly destroyed, Aaron leaned down and pressed a kiss to your trembling leg. A kiss. Soft and lingering, like he wasn’t simultaneously driving into you with enough force to make you think about it for days. A true gentleman, really. Absolutely chivalrous.
“Oh, fuck you,” you managed to gasp, your voice shaking as your nails dug into his arms.
He smirked, his hips snapping forward harder, making your back arch off the bed.
“I believe I already am,” he shot back smoothly, and damn him - despite the situation, or maybe because of it - you laughed.
The sound made him pause for a fraction of a second, his brow quirking as his lips twitched into something softer, something that could almost be called tender if he wasn’t currently wrecking you.
He leaned in, clearly intending to kiss you - except you were still laughing, leaving him kissing your teeth instead of your lips.
“You’re ridiculous,” he muttered against your mouth, his voice filled with faux exasperation, as if it weren’t entirely his fault. But the way he looked at you, his eyes soft and sweet despite the hunger blazing behind them, made it clear he wasn’t serious at all.
“I really hate you,” you managed to say, still laughing, the words breathless and shaky.
“Liar,” he countered smoothly, his lips curving into a grin of his own before he kissed you properly this time, slow and deep, stealing the air from your lungs. “You’ve never hated me at all.”
You opened your mouth to argue, but the next thrust silenced you, sending a bolt of pleasure straight to your core, leaving you gasping instead of speaking.
“Yeah,” he rasped, his voice thick, his eyes locked on yours as he watched you fall apart beneath him. “That’s exactly what I thought.”
Bastard. Oh, how he’d pay for this. Just… not now. Not when the heat in your stomach was building too quickly, you could already feel your toes curling, your legs trembling where they rested on his shoulders.
“Aaron-” His name spilled from your lips in a broken cry, your hands clutching at him desperately, your body trembling beneath him.
“I know,” he rasped, his forehead pressing against yours, his breath hot and uneven as it fanned over your lips. “You’re close. I can feel it. Fuck, you’re squeezing me so tight.”
And then, just to destroy you completely, he spat on his fingers. The sound alone sent a shiver through you, but watching him, seeing the way he reached down and slid his slick finger to your clit, circling it, left you utterly wrecked.
That alone was so unfairly hot you were surprised you didn’t come on the spot just from seeing it.
“God,” he groaned, his hips keeping the same rhythm as his fingers worked you over, the combination of his cock driving into you and his fingers basically breaking you apart. “I’m close too. Come for me. I want to feel it - I need to feel you.”
And there was no stopping it. The pressure snapped all at once, a tidal wave of pleasure crashing over you, leaving you shaking and gasping for air. Your body clung to him like he was the only thing keeping you tethered to reality, your nails digging into his back as your orgasm ripped through you.
“Aaron,” you cried out, his name falling from your lips in a broken, desperate plea as your cunt clenched around him so tightly that it pulled a guttural groan from his chest.
His movements stuttered, his rhythm faltering as he buried himself deep one last time, his head tipping back, lips shaping into your name.
You felt him spill inside you, the hot rush of him filling you, the heat prolonging the throbbing waves of your own climax, as your body convulsed with the lingering echoes of pleasure. It was too much. Too raw. Too perfect. The kind of climax that left you completely destroyed, your mouth falling open as you tried and failed to even catch your breath.
Your limbs felt boneless, your heart was about to burst out of your chest, a haze in your head. Wow.
Aaron’s thrusts slowed, his movements becoming languid as he guided you both through the final waves of pleasure, his hips rocking into you softly.
When he finally stilled, he stayed inside you, his body collapsing onto yours, every muscle undone, spent, his breath hot against your neck. His skin was slick with sweat, his weight pressing you into the mattress, and fuck, you never wanted him to move.
A slow, lazy kiss landed on your shoulder, his lips lingering there for a second before he murmured, "Are you okay?"
Really?
A laugh bubbled up before you could stop it, as your fingers threaded through his beautiful damp hair. “Okay?” you echoed, still struggling to breathe, still feeling the aftershocks of him inside you. “Aaron, I think you might’ve just killed me.”
He huffed out something that could’ve been a laugh if he had the energy, and just because he was perfectly positioned - completely wrecked, head buried against your shoulder, practically melting into you - you pressed a soft kiss to his forehead.
It felt almost paternalistic, sure, the kind of kiss that came with the smug satisfaction of having him completely undone over you, like he might fall apart if he even tried to move. The salt of his sweat clung to your lips, a stark contrast to the bitter taste of the tears you’d swallowed earlier. It felt better - so much better.
Aaron sighed against your skin, lips twitching like he wanted to smile but was too exhausted to bother, he pulled out, leaving you wincing at the sudden emptiness.
He sat back on his heels, his gaze dropping to the mess he’d made of you, and for a moment, you swore he looked almost proud. But, of course, because Aaron fucking Hotchner couldn’t let you have five uninterrupted minutes of post-orgasmic bliss without switching into Mr. Practical, he tilted his head and said, “You should probably clean yourself up.”
You blinked at him, deadpan. “Wow. Romance is truly alive and well.”
He grinned just enough to make you want to hit him and kiss him at the same time. “Where do you keep your towels?” he asked.
“Wow,” you muttered, flopping back onto the bed. “Absolutely fantastic. I give you my soul, and in return, you turn into a housekeeper.”
“Don’t be so dramatic,” he said, leaning down to press a kiss to your temple before standing and stretching.
And, of course, because the universe hated you, he looked absurdly good doing it. Broad shoulders, sweat-slicked skin, and the faint red lines your nails had left down his back. God, his back. Huge. Muscular. You really wanted to-
“Dramatic?” you scoffed, snapping yourself out of the borderline feral train of thought. “I just had the best orgasm of my life, and now you’re asking me about towels. What’s next, changing my bedsheets?”
He shot you a look over his shoulder, that infuriating smirk still tugging at his lips. “Best?” he echoed, his tone dripping with mock surprise. “Did I hear you correctly?”
You groaned, “God, you’re unbearable.”
“No, no,” he continued, turning back toward you, his smirk widening into something dangerously close to smug. “Say it again. Best orgasm of your life? Because I recall giving you three - you might need to pluralize that.”
Oh, how cocky he was. You grabbed the nearest pillow and chucked it at him, unfortunately the man also had perfect reflects. “So, where are these towels?”
“In the bathroom,” you muttered, gesturing vaguely in its direction. “Third drawer on the left. Please, by all means, go do your very important post-coital housekeeping.”
He chuckled as he made his way to the bathroom, and you watched him go, biting your lip as your gaze drifted lower. Because of course you looked. How could you not? The way his muscles moved as he walked, the strong lines of his back leading down to that quite flat yet perfectly sculpted-
“Stop staring,” he called over his shoulder without even looking back.
You scowled, sitting up and grabbing the other pillow to hurl at the bathroom doorway. “I wasn’t staring!”
He was no fun.
“You know,” you called after him, unable to help yourself, “it’s a shame you’re so good in bed, because you are the single most annoying person I’ve ever met.”
“Funny,” he shot back from the bathroom, his voice echoing slightly. “You didn’t seem too annoyed about it five minutes ago.”
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Not that you had been even a little annoyed when you woke up right into his arms - despite the fact that you distinctly remembered falling asleep holding him.
“How much time do we have?” you murmured, your words muffled as your head stayed nestled against his chest.
“You’ve got 1 hour... I got half” he chuckled, then continued “I need to head home and get changed.”
But his arms instinctively tightened around you, like he wasn’t quite ready to let you go just yet. Like he could pretend, just for a little longer, that there was still time.
“How amazing would Agent Hotchner be if he just called to say we had the weekend off?” you said, tracing patterns of his flexed bicep tighetened around you.
He chuckled softly, the vibration of it rumbling beneath your cheek. “I doubt Agent Hotchner even has the strength to get up and take his phone from his jacket.”
“Well, since I’m feeling so generous, I could go and hand it to him,” you offered with faux magnanimity, but before you could move, his hand slid to the back of your head, pressing you back into him, while the other hand gripped your waist.
“Stay,” he said too softly for your own good.
You smiled against him. “I could stay longer if we didn’t have to go to work, you know...”
He chuckled again, this time shaking his head in amusement. “Nice try, sweetheart.”
Your head lifted slightly, an eyebrow raised. “Sweetheart?”
And there it was.
Fuck.
Was this the time to tell you? That if he’d been smitten before, now he was utterly undone? That despite making a living solving puzzles, he couldn’t think of a single scenario in which he wasn’t yours?
It was logic, wasn’t it? A proposition is true if it’s reflected in reality.
And this was his truth: he was yours. Irrevocably, undeniably yours.
There wouldn’t be a more evident fact - not until the marks you’d left on his neck and chest faded away. But even then? He would still belong to you.
Damn the stoics for being right.
“Sorry,” he said, as though the endearment had slipped past his guard.
Before he could say more, you tilted your head up and kissed him, catching him completely off guard. His startled expression was so genuine that you couldn’t help yourself - you kissed him again, determined to wipe it off his face.
His lips curled into a smile against yours, and when you finally pulled back true to form, he couldn’t resist deflecting. “If you’re trying to charm me into giving the day off, I’ll save you the trouble - it’s not going to work. Even if you keep kissing me.”
You laughed and leaned up to give him another kiss. But this time, you didn’t stop there. You moved down, pressing wet, open-mouthed kisses along his jaw. “I just want to make sure you understand the opportunity you’re blowing here,” you murmured into his skin, your lips ghosting over his pulse.
“The reports aren’t going to fill themselves,” he replied, though his voice lacked conviction.
Oh, neither was your cu-
“You sure about that?” you teased, nibbling gently at his collarbone as your hand trailed lower, brushing over where something was definetely starting to grow in between his boxers, making him hiss.
“What’s the matter?” you asked innocently, your hand now resting over his hardening cock, feeling the heat of him through the thin fabric.
“Maybe it’s the fact that you’re devouring my neck at seven in the morning,” he managed.
“Devouring? Not yet.” Your lips descended again, this time grazing over his collarbones, the faint scrape of your teeth dragging along his skin. When you bit lightly at his chest, his sharp inhale was all the reward you needed. “But don’t worry, I plan to.”
His mouth opened like he was about to fire back, but before he could, your hand slipped beneath the waistband of his boxers.
You stroked him slowly, dragging your thumb over the slick head, smearing the precum as if you had all the time in the world. “So,” you started lightly, as he cussed at your touch, “what are you going to do with the hour we have left?”
He tried to respond, he really did.
“I-” His breath hitched when your tongue darted out to trace just above his lower stomach.
“Well?” you pressed, lifting your head to look at him, your grin so sweet it could’ve killed him. “Breakfast? A shower? Or, you know, something else?”
“Breakfast sounds…” He barely managed to get the words out before his voice broke entirely, his body jerking slightly when your tongue flicked out to tease the tip of his cock.
“…like a good idea,” he finished weakly, though you weren’t convinced he even knew what he was saying at this point… better like this anyways.
“Good,” you hummed, dragging wet kisses along his length, while your hand kept moving, stroking him slowly, savoring the way his cock twitched in your hand. “So, Aaron, what do you feel like having for breakfast?”
His head fell back against the pillow, a low groan escaping him as his fingers tangled in your hair. “God,” he rasped, the word dragged out of him so pitifully it was almost tragic.
You grinned against his skin, looking up at him. “I’m pretty sure that’s not in my fridge,” you replied deadpan.
“Sweetheart…” He was absolutely desperate as your kisses moved lower, your tongue tracing a path along the underside of his cock.
“Hmm?” you hummed innocently, as if you didn’t notice the way his grip tightened in your hair or the slight tremble in his thighs.
He didn’t answer - but his phone did instead.
The sharp buzzing from the pocket of his discarded jacket in the living room shattered the moment.
Both of you jerked back, adrenaline ripping through the haze, already halfway off the bed before you even thought about it.
It was clumsy, both of you scrambling, bumping into each other as you stumbled toward the sound, breathless for entirely different reasons now.
Aaron got to it first, answering with the efficiency of a man who had switched back to work mode in an instant.
The call clicked on, and a voice - male, urgent - filled the room. "…The two bodies. The man died from a gunshot to the head, though he was stabbed multiple times post-mortem. The woman died from stab wounds."
You stilled.
Aaron’s face hardened. Rocher’s victims.
The ones he had been taunting you with.
"Agent Hotchner, there’s one thing…" the agent on the other end hesitated.
Aaron’s eyes sharpened. "What?"
"These bodies were killed exactly fifteen days ago," he said.
Aaron froze, you felt it at the same time he did - fifteen days ago.
You and Aaron had been interrogating Rocher exactly fifteen days ago.
He hadn’t killed them himself. He couldn’t have.
You were both there.
Your eyes met his, and for a split second, neither of you spoke.
“He had a partner,” Aaron said, his arm sliding around you instinctively, pulling you closer before you even realized you were starting to breathe too fast.
“Did you manage to identify the victims?” he asked.
“Yes - the man’s name is Michael Fowler, 34, a lawyer, junior associate at Madison & Green. The woman is Renee Hudson, 22, student at Columbia University, enrolled in the faculty of…”
You didn’t even know why you tensed so much.
The answer was obvious before he even said it.
“…philosophy.”
The call ended, but the silence left behind was louder than the voice on the line had been.
And in that silence, you could hear everything - the inevitability of it, tangled with the sound of the tears slipping down both of your faces.
And when your gaze flicked to Aaron, when his arm instinctively pulled you closer, you knew - without a word, without a glance – you’ve been both staring at the exact same spot on the wall.
Because it wasn’t just the age gap.
It wasn’t just the coincidence of numbers.
It was what made it undeniable.
A lawyer.
And a philosopher.
And the way your broken voices found each other in the quiet, harmonizing each other’s names in perfect, unintentional sync, just a few rushed heartbeats later.
Almost like in the musicals.
Almost sweet.
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taglist: @beata1108 ; @c-losur3 ; @fangirlunknown ; @hayleym1234 ; @justyourusualash ; @khxna ; @kyrathekiller ; @lostinwonderland314 ; @mxblobby ; @oxforce ; @percysley ; @person-005 ; @prettybaby-reid ; @reidfile ; @royalestrellas ; @ssa-callahan ; @softestqueeen ; @theseerbetweenus ; @todorokishoe24
I sincerely apologize - but the cockblocking was absolutely necessary. Otherwise, they'd never keep their hands to themselves. Honestly, with a job like this, interruptions are basically a given. If I had a nickel for every time these two got cockblocked by a phone call, I’d have two nickels - which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it happeend twice.
Ahem... so, uh, let me know what you think... of this. All of this. I need your feedback because I am currently gnawing at the edges of my enclosure
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novacorpsrecruit · 2 days ago
Text
It’s lonely at the top
Part 1 | part 2 | here / final part
Read on Ao3
wc 1,698 | Steddie | angst with a happy ending!
“You need to give him some space,” Robin said over the phone. Eddie frowned. It’s been three days. He missed Steve. He nearly leaped over the couch to answer the phone, assuming it was him. Robin was the next best, he guessed. “You really hurt him.”
“I know,” Eddie said. “And I’m sorry. I really am. Will you tell him I’m done with the parties? Done with Trick? He means more to me than being liked.”
“Yeah,” Robin huffed. “You sure showed him that.”
“I mean it,” Eddie said honestly. “I do. I’m done with it all.”
“I think you need to tell him that yourself,” Robin said.
“How can I?” Eddie asked. “You won’t let me talk to him.”
“He doesn’t want to talk to you,” Robin corrected. “You need to let him be ready to accept you.”
Eddie sighed, pressing his forehead against the cabinet where the phone hung. He wished there was a way to tell Steve how sorry he was. As much as Eddie wanted to take the Green line to Robin’s dorm and talk to Steve, he can’t cross that boundary. But he needed a way to pour out his emotions, to let Steve know that he’s loved. That Eddie’s sorry. “Can I — Can I send him a letter? That way when he’s ready, he knows I’m there for him?”
There was silence on the other line as Robin thought it over. “Yeah, okay,” she said. “Just address it to me. He’s not …”
“Supposed to be there,” Eddie nodded. “Yeah. I figured. Thank you, for being there for him.”
“Yeah. Look,” Robin huffed. “If he does let you back in again, and you fuck up again. It’s your balls, Munson.”
“Understood,” Eddie said. “I promise. Never again.”
Robin hung up with a click. Eddie sighed, running his hands over his face. He fucked up. Bad.
He guessed there was no time to start writing like the present.
💌💌💌💌
“Steve, someone at table 13 requested you personally,” Jenny, the hostess said. “He’s — uh — a little scary. So if you have issues, get Rod.”
“Thanks, Jenny,” Steve said, pulling his order book from his apron. He wasn’t sure who would request him at 3 pm. Most of his early birds on Saturdays stop by the diner for brunch and he barely saw a soul until 5.
When they first moved out to Chicago, Steve had no clue what he was going to do for work. He was attending Harold Washington College to get his associates in early education, and then potentially apply to UIC. Then one day, he got off a stop too early and saw the help wanted sign. It was easy for him to pick up, he made decent tips, and it worked with his schedule well. Plus, he was able to take home food at the end of his shift.
Robin’s been enjoying the pancakes lately.
Plus, Steve loved when it was slow and Eddie would —
He closed his eyes, letting the thought disappear. He missed Eddie. His heart ached any time he thought about him. But he was afraid that Eddie didn’t miss him in the same way.
He took a deep breath and plastered on a fake smile as he greeted his table.
“Hi, welcome in. I’m Steve. I’ll be taking care —“ Steve stopped as he looked at the patron. He felt his lips turn into a frown. “Trick?”
“Patrick’s fine,” Trick winked. “I mean, we’re in your court, aren’t we?”
“Yeah, sure,” Steve nodded. He pressed his lips together, feeling like he couldn’t stop staring at the black and blue circles under his eyes. “What happened to your — uh —“ he gestured to his own face. He winced. Trick didn’t like him in the first place. He wouldn’t give Steve the time of day. Why would he bother to tell him about an injury like that. “Sorry — shouldn’t have asked that. What can I get started for you?”
“Your boyfriend, actually,” Trick smirked. It was like ice water was dumped over Steve as the words washed over him. Trick’s smirk dropped. He leaned over the table. His voice dropped to a whisper. “Hey — hey, sorry. I didn’t mean — It’s cool. It’s — Eddie and you — are cool, I mean.”
Steve wasn’t sure if he felt any better or worse. All he could say was, “Oh.”
“Yeah, uh —“ Trick ran his fingers over his buzzed hair and exhaled. “Half of our friends are gay or lesbian or queer. It’s — that’s fine. Promise.”
“Oh,” Steve repeated. He sat on the other side of the booth, across from Trick. “Okay.”
“I just —“ Trick looked up to the ceiling before turning his attention back to Steve. “We shouldn’t have judged you. We saw you and immediate thought you were gonna be some straight jackass like we’ve dealt with our whole lives. We built this community of accepting outcasts, and outcasted you while doing so.”
Oh.
Steve wasn’t sure what to think.
When Eddie and him started to date, the Corroded Coffin boys treated him similarly. But Eddie called them out on that before it got bad.
Before it got like this.
“I guess what I wanted to say was sorry,” Trick said. “For pushing you out. And name calling.”
Steve furrowed his brow. “I don’t recall any name calling?”
“Yeah, you weren’t around for that,” Trick winced, gesturing to his nose. “Eddie made sure I knew that was wrong.”
“Eddie,” Steve breathed. “My Eddie?”
“Yep,” Trick said. “I hope he gave you a big apology for everything. So, tell me. What do you got that’s good to eat here?”
Steve took Trick’s order — one strawberry milkshake and an order of fruit loaded French toast — sent it to the kitchen, then went into the bathroom. He shut the door behind him and pulled out Eddie’s letter from his apron pocket. The first letter arrived last Monday. And he received a letter every day that he’s stayed with Robin.
With a shaky breath, Steve opened the letter.
💌💌💌💌
Dear Steve, there’s nothing in the world that I can do to make this up to you. But I will try every day to make sure that you don’t ever forgotten again. You are the stars that light my way home, the sun that brings warmth into my light, and the moon that shines love over me. To experience your love is something truly unreal. And to think I put you on the back burner for a taste of popularity? It was like the Ring of Power overtook my mind. I got lost in the feeling of being admired by many, I forgot what it’s like to be loved by one. I’d travel to Mordor and back for you. Through the Gap of Rohan and through the Mines of Mora.
In a world where everyone could know my name, I’d only want to know yours.
My apologies will never be enough. Love, Eddie
💌💌💌💌
I hope you are well. I hope your classes are going good and that you’re excelling. I know you are. You’re so fucking smart, you blow me away with every new piece of knowledge you brought home. I hope that basketball at the YMCA is going good. I’m sorry I missed your last couple of games. There is no excuse. I hope one day you’d allow me to be by your side again, cheering you on.
You deserve the world, baby. Nothing will stop me from showing you that. Everything from the water in the rivers to the trees in the forest. From the canyons in Arizona to the mountains in Colorado. It’s yours. It’s all yours. You deserve everything. You deserve the best. And I promise that I will prove that.
Forever in love, Eddie
💌💌💌💌
I’d move heaven and hell
Just to see you smile again
Or remember how it felt
To have you in my arms
When I begged God for mercy
In the depth of hells
It was nothing compared
To begging for the mercy of you
To hear you laugh, to see you smile
To counting the stars across your skin
To pick up where we left off
To start all over again
I’d move heaven and hell for you
💌💌💌💌
Steve folded the letters, slipping them back into the envelope and set them on his nightstand.
He laid back down, turning to his side. Eddie’s side of the bed was empty. Like it has been for four days.
After Steve read the first letter, he found his way back to their apartment. Eddie was hope and nearly wrapped his arms around Steve, stopping as if there was an invisible barrier in between them. Eddie stopped, respecting that boundary at the threshold.
It was Steve to crack.
Steve who took that step over the threshold and fell into Eddie’s arms, burying his face into Eddie’s neck. Eddie wrapped his arms around Steve, holding him tight. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” was all Eddie could say.
They agreed they needed to slowly integrate back into each others’ lives. Communicate when they’re feeling alone and listen when one’s feeling distressed. Nightmares seemed easier to deal with, but they were going to work it through.
Eddie said he would sleep on the couch until Steve was ready for him. “No matter how long it takes, sweetheart,” Eddie said, pressing a kiss against Steve’s knuckles. “When you’re ready for me, I’m here.”
And Eddie truly meant that. They could go back to just friends and Eddie would accept it. He would be heartbroken, but to have Steve in his life again?
That’s worth everything to Eddie.
Eddie was jostled awake, feeling the couch cushion shift underneath him. The blanket on his body lifted up and a familiar weight settle on his chest. He felt at home again. Eddie tugged the blanket back over the both of them, one hand around Steve’s waist and the other tangled in his hair as Steve laid his head on Eddie’s chest. Eddie pressed a kiss to Steve’s temple, taking a silent vow to never lose him again.
“Goodnight, sweetheart.”
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ladycremecaramel · 2 days ago
Note
So this was my ask from a long time ago, and I had thoughts of mgit (modern girl in thedas) story for this, but it never came to fruition. What I did do, though, was write a drabble from the Inquistor's POV. I thought it was long gone, but I stumbled upon it through my Google docs. After reading it, I thought I would post it here.
For context, the woman's name is Nora, and she is married and has a kid. There was an accident of some sort where the husband and child didn't survive, but she did and wound up in Thedas with the mark on her hand. She didn't want anything to do with the Inquisition as her spouse and child were her whole world and was grieving. She didn't care if she lived or died, but her moral compass of wanting to help those in need prevented her from outright killing herself.
Over time, the grief becomes...less in a way. After the fall of Haven and becoming the Inquisitor, her depression ramps up again but also has conflicting feelings about Cullen.
Then she becomes kidnapped red templars and...I forgot what they called the evil mages that worked for Corypheus were called. The ones that went crazy or were they called blood mages? Anyway, their plan was to 'kill' the Inquisitor and then use necromancy on her dead body to have control of the mark. Obviously, that doesn't happen cuz the Inquisition comes to the rescue juuuust in time.
So here it is. Below this is a TW of depression, blood, thoughts of suicide, and mentions of rape
Whack.
She yelped in pain as he punched the side of her face again. Another swollen bruise to add the collection on her body and face. She tried to wrench her wrists free of her binds, but the rope held tight was starting to cut into her skin. “Why am I fighting this? Don’t I want to die?” She thought to herself as her body struggled against her captors. 
She wasn’t sure, but her thoughts were stilled when a rough hand grabbed her by the throat. The red templar forced her to look up at him as he tightened his grip. Staring into the glowing crimson eyes, he snarled. “Should I let them rape you, mage? If you keep fighting, I won’t let you have any dignity left.” 
Nora froze upon hearing those words. To be raped and let whatever was to be become of her? His grip was tightening as she went limp with fear. If she were to die anyway, she wanted to at least have the choice to stay intact. The man stilled his tightening grip and slowly loosened his hold to see if she would struggle again. She didn’t move. Taking as a sign of surrender, he ordered the other men to bind her legs quickly. 
Everything moved quickly in a blur for her after that as she was carried to the open wooden box and placed inside. Her eyes began to sting with tears while her captors placed the lid on top and hammered it down with nails. She couldn’t see anything, but she could hear their voices. 
Soon she heard what sounded like chanting. It sounded low and in another language. What was going on out there? Did it matter? She watched interior of the box glow at the seams with a dark purple energy. It glowed brighter and brighter what felt like the longest time before it faded away, plunging her back into darkness. 
The next thing she knew was that box was being lifted and then lowered back down. She rocked back and forth with the casket, but it soon lurched with a soft thump. Nora fidgeted around with her hands tied in front of her until she heard the sound dirt being poured on top of the box she was in. Her eyes grew wide, and she sobbed. “This is it. This is how I die.” She thought as she tried to calm herself and accept her fate as she was being buried alive. 
“It shouldn’t be painful. I’ll fall unconscious as I lose oxygen. I’ll get to see my boys again soon. Just like I always wanted. I would have already offed myself if I didn’t have this fucking curse on my hand. They wanted their world saved though. My stupid guilty, noble do-the-right-thing just HAD to win out…” 
She thought like this as the sound of the dirt grew fainter. She assumed it was because her grave was almost filled up. She wondered how much time she actually had. It could be a few minutes to possibly a few hours or so she was told by Google. Looks like she was going to test that theory. 
Nora let her mind sift through all her memories. From her childhood to her adolescent days to adulthood. Then it went to more recent memories of losing her husband and child in a flash of green and then winding up in Thedas. Going through the story of the game or most of it anyway. She thought about the companions she met and actually becoming friends with them. She even thought about him. She wasn’t sure how she felt about him still but he definitely made her heart race. 
She wasn’t sure how much time has passed but the sound of the dirt stopped and she heard muffled shouts and what sounded like metal clashing. She strained her ears as best as she could. She couldn’t tell how deep she was buried but it didn’t sound like she was buried too deep or she wouldn’t have likely heard anything. 
She was starting to feel tired. When she heard a muffled angry voice that sounded like...
“Cassandra?”
They came all this way for me?
--------------
Aaaaannnnd end. That's it. Then my ask picks up from there.
You don't have to do this one. DAi: LI's only. After locating the Inky's they find that their leader is nowhere in sight. After some fruitless interrogating, they hear a faint THUMP THUMP THUMP and muffled screaming. They search for the source and find a half filled grave and the sound of their leader under the dirt. Their reaction: Discovering their Inky was buried alive.
Cassandra: Her heart drops, and the panic doesn’t even have time to settle before she is loudly barking orders and trying to steady her breathing. The second she gets the Inquisitor out of his shallow grave; she grabs him in a big hug and refuses to let go. The seeker is far from a merciful person, any may Andraste protect whoever dared do this to the person she loves. For a second she looks up at the man she loves, dirty and bruised with a mixture of panic and fear in his eyes. She doesn’t even want to think about what would’ve happened if they hadn’t gotten there sooner. 
Solas: Bring along the fury of a wolf and you will end up being ripped apart by the pack, this is very much apparent with Solas. The apostate is quick on his feet, helping his vhenan out of the grave and staring at the people responsible whom they just questioned; he has murder in his gaze. The only thing stopping him from acting then and there is the soft touch from his lover, her shaking body quickly moving closer to him for comfort. He would never forgive the people who did this and the ones who survived his visit later that night were the unlucky ones.
Dorian: At first he is rather unsettling, extremely calm and soft-spoken, only to lash out when someone makes a rather poor comment as the Inquisitor is helped out of his grave. Dorian feels utterly helpless and furious when he sees his Amatus like that, the man has bruises around his wrists showing he was tied; a busted lip and a tired gaze. he knows that if they had been slower the man he loved would’ve been underneath them all along but lacking the consciousness to ever speak up about where he was. One wrong clue or details lost could’ve led to being one minute too late. And that terrifies him.
Sera: May whatever god these people look up to be a just and forgiving one; because Sera sure as hell isn’t. As soon as Inky is out of that grave, an arrow is lodged into the leg of the nearest guilty person; and she has to be held back from jumping the man. She has no mercy for these people, and absolutely no pity for them as their screams reach her ears. Sera is scarily silent as she calms down, quickly finding her girlfriend and latching onto her- a shaky breath escaping her as she promises that she won’t ever let this happen again.
Blackwall: Honestly; it would surprise noone if Thom admitted to having done this himself, seeing as how calm he was when he was met with the issue itself; quick and steady hands knowing what to do right away. He doesn’t speak much when the Inquisitor stumbles out of the grave, clinging onto him and gasping for air and shaking. The tears in her eyes is enough to send his very being into a angry rampage; but he simply stays silent. Comforting his lover as he leads her away from the site, the others can deal with the vermin.
Iron Bull: May whoever did this rest in peace, because honestly they messed up the second they dared to mess with anyone who had contacts within the chargers. Bull is extremely gentle and careful with his lover; the poor thing shaking and it breaks his heart the second he sees the bruises on their face. Being buried alive is not fun, he would know. He is more aware than anyone else how lucky they were; because you loose oxygen fast in a casket. He lets out a shaky breath before kissing their face, muttering an apology for taking so long.
Josephine: When she had heard the word of what happened, she couldn’t help but close herself inside the office and just cry. Leliana had made sure she got time to let out all the worry and stress as she awaited for her lover to return. When they did? They were met by Josephine, puffy eyes and a lip that she had clearly chewed on more than enough to draw blood. And she only started crying again when she saw their bruised face, just about starting to heal from traveling back. She hated that she had to let them go on these trips; but she knew stopping them would only make things worse. With a tired sigh she grabs their hand, they needed a few hours. Just to be.
Cullen: He was the one leading the rescue operation, and he thought he had the ability to act cool. But when the Inquisitor is helped up from the casket and is finally able to see in the much brighter area; she sees him acting extremely out of character. The man on the ground is bleeding heavily from his face as Cassandra pulls the commander away from him. Cullen had been scared, he had felt so lonely when he found out that his rage blinded him and for a split second he wanted nothing else but to kill the person responsible. He feels his anger melt when the hand of his loved one is carefully placed on his cheek, as she whispers for him to calm down. She is bruised, tired and was probably on her last breaths. He would never forgive himself for allowing this to happen to begin with, but may the maker have mercy on the people responsible. They would face the wrath of Cullen Rutherford.
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organic-bloodbath · 3 days ago
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Knife Princess
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Chishiya x Reader
Summary: You're Niragi's little sister, and he's not happy of Chishiya's interest on you. When the final game starts and you get hurt, Chishiya takes care of you.
Warnings: 18+ smut, lots of blood ig.
A/N: I was writing a Chishiya request but realised half way i needed to write a prequel for that first lmao. So, this will have more parts coming up ✨️
♤♡♧◇
During your time at the Beach, Chishiya became intrigued by you. He analyzed your movements when you weren't watching - atleast he thought you didn't notice him.
He could see that men eyed you while you were laying by the pool in your bikinis, but nobody dared to approach you. Everyone knew you were Niragi's sister and that terrified the shit out of them.
Why? Because Niragi seemed to be a little overprotective of you. If he could see even one pair of male eyes thirsting over you, Niragi wouldn't hesitate to beat them up. People here had seen that happen several times. Some men thought they'd get away with a little bit of flirting, but Niragi seemed to have eyes everywhere at any times.
One day, Chishiya watched you, sitting by the edge of the pool once again in your yellow bikinis, legs tangling in the water to cool yourself down. You were enjoying the sun, black sunglasses resting on the bridge of your nose. You weren't aware of his gaze, you had no idea how his eyes lingered on your skin. Atleast, that's what he thought.
Chishiya turned around just for a moment to leave, and suddenly you had appeared right behind him.
"You like what you see, hm?" you asked and put your hands on your hips. Chishiya stayed silent, an amused look on his face as he turned around to face you. "I've seen you looking at me, you know," you smirked and bit your lip. "You're not as sneaky as you think you are."
"Is that so?" Chishiya hummed.
"Mhm. A lady like me has grown eyes on her back too," you said proudly.
"I see," Chishiya said, intrigued once more. "So, tell me. Why do you wear boots at the pool?"
Chishiya had noticed that you always had the same leather boots on, while most people wore sandals or were just bare foot.
You only smiled and tilted your head, slowly stepping closer to him so you could reach to put your hands on his shoulders. You leaned so close to his face that you were only inches away from him, and he could feel your minty breath when you whispered: "You'll have to take them off and find out."
And then, only with a smile and a wink you let go of him and turned around, leaving him to stand there by himself to go back inside.
Chishiya wasn't sure if he only imagined it, but it felt like you swayed your hips more dramatically than usual as you knew that he would watch you walking away. If your plan was to not let Chishiya's eyes leave your body - you succeeded with that.
"Careful," Kuina said next to Chishiya. "Don't let Niragi see that you were checking his sister out."
"I wasn't checking her out," Chishiya denied, but he knew that it was a lie. He knew that he'd be dead if Niragi found out even about his thoughts on you, but Chishiya also knew that you were a woman with your own choices.
"Mhm, whatever you say," Kuina said, a hint of worry in her voice.
♤♡♧◇
After your short talk by the pool, it took only two more days to get Chishiya to take you into his bedroom and push you on his bed.
You knew that with right words, you could get any man that you wanted. Not every man could be seduced with the same methods, however, so you needed a little time to calculate what kind of person you were dealing with. You let men flirt with you here, even though you didn't plan to actually do anything with them, but you knew it pissed off Niragi and you enjoyed that.
Of course you wouldn't sleep with everyone here, though, you did have quite high standards and a specific taste and none of the men at the Beach had raised your curiosity enough.
Until you met Chishiya. He stood out from the crowd, usually staying mostly by himself or with a limited one to two people. You wanted to get to know him. No, you needed to get to know him. Maybe not emotionally yet, but atleast physically.
Truthfully, you hadn't had sex in months, you needed it much more than you had thought. Chishiya sucked all the stress and worry off you with his touch which gave you pleasure, even if it was only for a moment.
Right now, Chishiya had you pinned on the bed under him, holding your hands above your head and planting kisses around your neck and collarbones. You didn't know how he managed to find all the sweet spots which made you go insane already on your first time together, but he did nevertheless.
He untied the top of your bikini and threw it away, not caring where it would land. He took off his shirt as well to stay fair with you.
He peppered kisses all around your body as he slowly crawled back, until his head was located between your legs. He pulled the bottom of your bikini off, seeing now every part of your body. It didn't take long for him to rub your clit and push his fingers inside, starting to explore your vagina with different movements.
"Oh, fuck," you gasped. He moved his hand away for a moment but you quickly stopped him by grabbing his hair. "Wait, can you- can you do that again?"
Chishiya smirked. "Do what again?" he asked. "This?"
You arched your back as Chishiya pushed his fingers back inside you, curling his fingers just in the right angle like he had done earlier. You had to grab the bedsheets into your fists to stay still.
When he pushed himself inside you, you felt like this was what you had needed the most during your time at the Beach. During all the games.
Sleeping with him was something you felt like you had needed for years. He was the perfect balance of both rough and gentle in the best way possible to give you pleasure in its highest form.
You had no idea how much time passed while you were trapped between his body and the mattress, you were in complete ecstasy and you never wanted him stop what he was doing.
You were sure your body would be full of marks he had created on your body and you'd have to show it off to everyone, but right now, right at that moment, you didn't care about anything besides you and him.
♤♡♧◇
"What's that?" Niragi asked next morning and stepped closer to you, looking at the bruises on your neck, trying to hide themselves behind you hair. He grabbed your hair and yanked it back to see your neck better. "Are those hickeys? Who made those?"
"What is it for you?" you spat. "You can do whatever you want with whoever and so can i."
Niragi narrowed his eyes for your attitude.
"Who," Niragi growled with a low voice, finger pressing on one of the many bruises, his dark eyes directly on yours, "made that?"
You just grinned smugly.
"Try to guess," you challenged him.
♤♡♧◇
"You fucked my sister?!" Niragi shouted louder than ever before. Chishiya jumped back when he saw Niragi storming towards him, pointing his rifle towards Chishiya.
"Well, to my defense, she came to me," he said, lifting his hands up to surrender and trying to ignore the rifle, inches from his face.
"Out of all the girls here, dozens of them, you just had to choose her?!"
"Niragi, we're-"
Niragi put his gun down and instead grabbed Chishiya by his shirt and slammed him against the wall. Chishiya winced a little when the back of his head hit hard on the wall but otherwise he kept his regular pokerface.
"What should i do with you now, hm?" Niragi asked. "Shoot you dead right here right now or take a knife and carve little marks on your skin before shooting you. Any last wishes?"
He took a knife from his pocket, pressing the tip against Chishiya's cheek, a little too close to his left eye.
"Did you want to get a revenge on me? I thought we were buddies, man."
"Listen," Chishiya chuckled nervously in Niragi's tight grip. "Just let me down and we'll-"
"I know she's pretty, obviously, it's in our genes," Niragi interrupted, not caring to listen to Chishiya's defense. "But atleast talk about it before to me, man. Don't just go and screw her like that."
"So, if i had asked you for your blessing to sleep with your sister, you would have been okay with that?"
The anger rose back to Niragi's eyes. Chishiya was basically throwing more fuel into the fire flaming inside Niragi.
"Niragi, what are you doing?" you shouted from the end of the hallway before Niragi would be able go put a bullet in Chishiya's skull, walking towards the two guys with long steps. "Let go of him this instant."
"Or what?" Niragi asked. "You'll stab me over this guy?"
"If i have to," you said and crossed your arms against your chest.
"You can't be serious-"
You pulled a knife from your boot and pointed it at him.
"Let. Him. Down." You gritted your teeth, the same kind of anger in your eyes as in Niragi's. "Or you'll lose an ear."
Niragi huffed and let Chishiya go, coming towards you.
"Seriously, Y/N?" he whispered to you. "Him?"
"Mind your own damn business," you spat.
Eventually, Niragi left, but he wasn't in a good mood. At all. You hadn't seen him that angry in a while. You didn't lash out at him like that because he was threatening specifically Chishiya, no. You were just tired of Niragi constantly meddling into your business with men over and over again. Whenever you'd have a single hickey on your neck, and Niragi saw that, he'd immediately lose his temper for someone touching you - as witnessed here. It had been the exact same back at home before ending up to this world, but back then he only had his fists and not a gun. You had tried to make him quit it so many times but he wasn't having it.
You let out a frustrated groan, and Chishiya walked towards you now that Niragi had disappeared.
"So, you always carry knives with you wherever you go?" Chishiya asked, hands in the pockets of his white hoodie and an amused smirk on his face. "That's why you wear boots even with a swimsuit?"
"Shouldn't everyone carry a weapon with them?" you asked seriously, raising an eyebrow. "You never know when you need to defend yourself."
"Fair," Chishiya admitted.
You stepped right in front of Chishiya and put your hand behind his neck, slowly caressing his shoulder.
"Want to have a round two in my room tonight?" you asked, clicking your tongue.
"I'm not sure if i want to lose my right eye for that," Chishiya smirked, still feeling the cold blade against his cheek.
"Niragi's not the boss of me," you said and rolled your eyes. "I'm not some little kid that needs to be protected."
"Oh i can definitely see that," Chishiya agreed and nodded.
"So, my room tonight." You put your finger on hips lips. "Don't make me wait too long, hm?"
♤♡♧◇
The fire was flaming high outside, waiting for corpses to be thrown in there.
When the 10 of Hearts game started and Aguni's men were slaughtering people left and right, you only sat back and watched the shitshow. You knew Niragi would never allow anyone to touch you so you weren't afraid of being accused of being the witch and getting thrown into the fire.
That was, as long as he was there to witness it, and right now he wasn't. Still, you didn't stress about the game nearly as much as the others there.
You had no idea what Chishiya and others were doing, but right now you really, really just craved for a snack and was heading towards your room.
However, before you managed to get any further, someone grabbed you by your hair and yanked you towards them, causing you to let out a small cry for the pain on your scalp.
"Ha! Maybe she's the witch!" a man, who you didn't know at all, shouted at your face, spit flying on your cheekbone. "Let's burn her!"
One more guy joined him to drag you towards the place where the fire was located. But they weren't able to get very far.
You managed to get free yourself from their grip, then reached for your boots and took the two knives out of them. You didn't hesitate a moment longer as you threw the knives towards the two men, the blades digging deep into the men's necks.
You had practiced throwing knives for the past decade - as a nice little hobby of yours.
The men fell on their knees, and you kicked them on their chest, causing them to fall on their backs. You leaned down to remove the knives from their throats, leaving them to bleed out on the carpet. You wiped the blood on the men's shirts, then putting the knives back into your boots and continued your way towards you room.
As you walked through the corridor, you didn't notice two pairs of eyes watching you behind a corner.
"Well, i sure wouldn't want to anger her," Kuina mumbled. She was in shock how such a small girl was able to take down two grown men at that speed.
"She managed to surprise me too," Chishiya admitted, arms crossed on his chest. And very few people did surprise him anymore, both Kuina and Chishiya himself knew that. "Although, she's related to Niragi, so i don't know if i should have been surprised."
♤♡♧◇
A little later, you were leaning against one of the pillars on the 3rd floor, watching Aguni beat up Arisu with all his strength. You felt another presence join you, but you didn't need to turn your head to see who it was.
"Enjoying the show?" Chishiya asked.
"It's like watching a violent theatre play with real blood."
"Mhm," Chishiya hummed. "Hearts games are brutal but this is definitely something else."
"It's kind of entertaining how insane people can go during the Hearts games," you commented and turned your head towards Chishiya. "Did you ever suspect me as the witch?"
Chishiya eyed you for a moment.
"You could have pulled it off," he admitted. "With those knives and all."
"Aw, i'm touched," you smiled, hand on your chest. "If i was proven to be the witch, would you have been able to burn me in the fire?"
"Well," Chishiya started slowly and turned his face back to the crowd downstairs. "Everyone just wants to survive and get out of here, right?"
You didn't say anything back, only followed the events happening two floors down.
After everything had finally started to calm down, the fire suddenly spread and Niragi stepped inside, looking like he had been thrown into the fire too but got out before turning into complete ash.
"Oh, shit," you mumbled.
Niragi started to shoot in every direction possible with his rifle, not caring who he hit with the bullets. He wanted everyone here to die, that was for sure. He shot not only vertically everywhere, also up in different angles.
That meant, also right into your direction. Chishiya pulled you back, but just a second too late. You felt burning pain on your right shoulder and right after your leg, blood starting to pour out of the wounds. You stumbled backwards, but Chishiya managed to catch you and held you up by your waist.
His eyes widened when he saw your shoulder being painted red, as well as your leg.
"This just isn't my day, is it?" you chuckled, trying to ignore the pain radiating through your arm and make fun of the situation.
Chishiya didn't have much time to start patching you up right now, you had to leave this place as soon as possible to get to safety.
"Wait a moment, i'll be right back," he said and left you there on your own for a moment, running to the room where you had previously been. For a minute you were afraid he had actually left you here to bleed out, not wanting to deal with your injuries.
Chishiya grabbed a first aid kid, towel and brought them with him as he hurried back to you as fast as he was possibly able to run.
"Hold these," he said and gave you the kit and the towel, then scooping you in his arms. He knew he couldn't run very fast carrying you, but it would be faster than dragging you by his side.
It didn't take too long for people to burn the witch and finish the game just before the time would run down to zero. You had finally passed the last game.
As you sat outside and watched the mansion burn down among all the other survivors, Chishiya was by your side sewing the bullet wound shut with a needle and thread. The bullet had exited your body on the back, so Chishiya was more than thankful that he wouldn't need to start operating on you any deeper.
You had started to look pale and feel dizzy for all the blood loss, but you managed to stay conscious. He had wrapped the towel tightly around your leg. It had been white, but was now dyed half red.
"Shiya..." you mumbled, but he didn't lift his face towards you, only concentrated on stitching you up. "I promise i'm not getting hurt on purpose just to get you to touch me."
Your words did amuse Chishiya and you could see a slight smirk on his face.
"Good, because i don't have any more supplies to left to treat your wounds," Chishiya said and cut the thread off, leaving you with clean stitches on your skin. He finally looked into your eyes, looking serious and worried. "Let me know immediately if the stitches open and you start bleeding again, got it?"
"Are you like a doctor or something?" you smiled and bit your lip.
"Something like that," he answered, and you could see a little smile on his lips as well.
"I've never slept with a doctor before," you admitted. "Before the Beach, i mean."
"Was it on your to-do list?"
"Might have been," you said. "Along with a firefighter, of course."
"Too bad we didn't have firefighters at the Beach," Chishiya concluded. "Would have saved us a lot of trouble. Or if there was, they clearly failed their job miserably."
"Perhaps," you said slowly. "I would have still chosen a doctor first though."
"Hm, really?" Chishiya wondered. "Good to know. So, your type is men who can save you from trouble?"
"I'm not a damsel in distress," you scoffed, coming off as offended and a bit too defensive.
"And still i did have to carry you out of there," Chishiya pointed out.
"Shut up," you said and gently hit him on his shoulder.
"You'll promise to take it slow with your arm and leg, okay?" he stated seriously.
"Of course, doctor," you teased and bit your lip. "How can i ever repay you for taking such a good care of me?"
"I have a few things in my mind, but i think we should go somewhere private first," Chishiya reminded and sat next to you, putting his hand around your waist for a moment.
"Why aren't we already leaving then?" you asked and brushed your finger against his collarbone, right by the zipper of his hoodie.
"Tempting, but i'd rather have you rest for a moment," Chishiya said and pulled you tighter against his body, whispering right into your ear: "But don't worry, i'll make sure to find us some time alone."
His hot breath against your ear sent chills down your spine.
♤♡♧◇
A/N: I'll have update for the Child of Hearts too at some point no worries, just have to figure out some scenes for it and shape it a lil bit 🫶🏻
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mostly-marvel-musings · 3 days ago
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Drunk words, sober thoughts
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A/N: Another entry for the amazing @elixirfromthestars ‘s Writing Challenge. Leave a heart, comment or reblog if you’ve enjoyed reading this!
Pairing: Logan x F! Reader
Warning: 18+ fluff. Drink responsibly kids.
Prompts used: 🥪 ✩。⋆⸜ "Do I need to remind you that we're not actually married?"
Hugh Jackman/Logan Masterlist
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Haze.
That was all your brain could comprehend. How you’d gotten yourself to this point was still obscure. But a rapidly diminishing rational part of your brain was sure your drink had been spiked.
It wasn't how the evening was supposed to go. Not at all. You were on a mission, albeit it was your first official one, it couldn't have gone any worse. The team carried out their respective tasks flawlessly while you - the rookie, were going to be in big trouble once they'd realized you had screwed up.
Deep down you were hoping Logan - your pretend husband for the evening would come and find you, rather rescue you. As you were cornered by a few men that were way too tall and burly to escape, you vaguely felt the comms from your ear been taken off, your limbs felt like jelly.
Were you being kidnapped? Where were your teammates? More importantly, where was Logan?
Any attempt to protest was silenced when they taped your mouth, taking you away from the banquet hall and towards a deserted alley. Before the men could shove you in their car, you felt their grip on you loosen, the familiar chink of metal claws being unleashed and a fight ensued.
It must've ended pretty quickly, or you were experiencing time gaps thanks to the drugs coursing through your bloodstream, but you felt a light but persistent tap against your cheek and a concerned looking Logan Howlett in your line of vision.
"Are you alright, bub? Y/N? Can you hear me?" he called, worry clear in his baritone.
"Mm?" You shook your head in a violent no, quickly realizing it was a bad move as your world shifted, making you dizzy.
You closed your eyes tight and tried to pull yourself together, failing to do so while Logan caught up with the rest of the team. They deciphered you'd had more than your fair share of alcohol given your state, and decided it was best to get you home. Logan had also picked up a smell that was definitely not your regular alcohol, probably the reason why you were so out of it, he'd realized. The team was concerned but probably not as much as the man before you.
A comforting mix of steady hands and a scent that was distinctly Logan enveloped you and lifted you off the ground and into a car.
"Ay! Look it's my husband!" You exclaimed loud enough to make Logan pull a face as he helped fasten your seatbelt.
“How are drunk are you?” He gave you a glance as the car pulled away from the venue, his brows furrowing when he saw you lean over to his side with a lazy grin on your face.
“Can I kiss you?”
“A lot, okay.”
With a firm grip on your shoulders, he made you lay back against the car, letting the back of his hand against your forehead that was slightly warm to touch. He was relieved to have found you before anything worse could happen, especially when your powers were compromised. Unbeknownst to you, Logan had developed some what of a soft spot for you. Not that he'd ever admit, but he found himself drawn to you more and more each passing day. For someone so seemingly fearless, he was terrified of confessing his feelings towards you.
It wasn't long until you found yourself in Logan's arms once again, this time with him carrying you up the school stairs towards your bedroom.
"I mean you could've carried us all the way across the threshold. Wait through the main door, did you—" You giggled mostly to yourself but with Logan and his sharp hearing, it was hard to ignore.
“Do I need to remind you that we're not actually married?" He mused with a faint hint of a smile on his rugged features. Unable to stop his chuckle at your adorable little pout, he gently set you down to your bed, hovering above you for a minute too long.
“We can’t leave the bed now. The pillows have accepted us.” You sighed dreamily, patting the place next to you for Logan to join.
Under any other circumstances, it would’ve been impossible to resist your offer, but you weren’t the right state of mind, and Logan was nothing if not a perfect gentleman.
“Get some rest, kid. You’re in for one hell of a hangover tomorrow.” Logan let his thumb caress the soft skin of your cheek, his eyes mapping your beautiful features.
He’d already made a mental note to get proper meds for you to help get the drugs out of your system. Just as he was about to close the door behind him and leave, he heard you mumble something else. He would’ve let it go, but the words that came out of your mouth nearly made his heart stop.
“What was that, bub?”
“Love you, Logan..” you mumbled against your pillow, clutching one tightly to your chest as sleep took over finally.
“Love you too. More than you’d ever know.” He smiled, finally saying it out loud, albeit not to you directly, felt good. He walked happy knowing you probably shared the sentiment.
Like they said, drunk words, sober thoughts.
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r4fe-cam3ron · 3 days ago
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𓍯 ִֶָ FEBRUARY EIGHTH; side b — strangers - ethel cain | f. harding x r
w; r is anna’s sister — but i do not describe physical attributes, slight unrequited love (not wholly), grief, doesn’t necessarily follow ‘nosferatu’ plot — besides the funeral of anna and the children. an; first work for friedrich!!! i am ABSOLUTELY awful at writing period pieces, so please forgive me if i actually butchered this :(
mixtape here!
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The tears that had fallen down your flushed cheeks almost felt frozen against your skin. The funeral was just a sickening reminder of what once was, was now gone. 
Your sister had been one of your best friends in some of the darkest times of the span of your life, helping you cross paths with obstacles and holding your hand to reassure you she’d never let go. 
And once you’d found out you were going to be an aunt to two beautiful girls, you were elated — buy little dresses and shoes for both. 
Anna had won at life in every aspect. 
Including Friedrich. 
A man whom you’d spotted one morning while you’d gone for a walk. A man who’d caught your attention by how beautiful he was to you — sad blue eyes, dark hair, pale skin. 
You’d never hold anger for Anna for finding someone who loved her just as much as she deserved — even if you longed for that feeling. Even if you longed for who was showing her that love. 
Now grief is heavy in your chest. There’s something missing — and if you didn’t know any better, you’d think someone had stolen your heart. 
The Priest’s voice slowly fades out into silence, a ringing in your ear replacing the prayer. 
Please forgive me, Lord. You manage a small prayer in your mind, yet you have yet to blink away a blurry vision of the caskets being led away and towards their final resting place. 
Your chin quivers slightly, eyebrows pinching together in what could only be described as anguish from anyone who looks at you. You can feel the eyes of Ellen who looks drained and tired. 
You can’t manage to meet the eyes of anyone else. 
Once the Priest has closed the book in his hand, your feet are quick to walk away, not wanting to be there any longer than what you had to. 
A shuddering breath leaves your parted lips, a slight stumble in your steps. It seems like a never ending path towards the carriage. A gloved hand quickly reaches out towards the door, making you stop in your steps. 
“I need to make sure you get home safely.” 
Your eyes drift over towards Friedrich. His blue eyes pop out more from his bloodshot, teary eyes. Snow dusts the shoulders of his jacket and hat. 
Shaking your head, you look away quickly. “No. I will be fine.”
“This is not a negotiation.” 
Clenching your jaw, the door opens and his hand lands on your back to help you inside. Sitting down on the left side, he steps inside and sits in front of you. Once he shuts the door, the sounds of the horses trotting are muffled as the carriage begins to move. 
The weight of his heavy stare remains on you the remainder of the way, the nauseous feeling almost dizzying. It makes you bite down on your tongue slightly as your eyes remain on the bare trees as you pass. 
The inside of your home is warm. It was small, even if you could afford a bigger home, you had no one to share that with. A small one was just as good. 
Your back straightens when the door closes and you glance over at Friedrich who looks around the home. You look away and pull at your gloves. “I am home now,” You place them on the table along with your jacket. “You can leave.” 
It’s silent for a moment. Then you hear a small sigh. “Why are you trying to dismiss me? I am trying…” He trails off. You remain with your back towards him, picking at the skin around your nails. You flinch when his hand suddenly wraps around your bicep, turning you towards him. 
You look mortified, he notices. At that, he frowns and tilts his head when you look away, trying to follow your line of sight. “Why are you practically avoiding me? You can’t even look at me!” 
“Because looking at you makes me sick!” You finally snap, looking at him finally. Even if there was no reason to raise your voice, there also wasn’t much to push you over the edge at the moment. “I can not bear to look at you without…” You trail off, your chin quivering once again. 
Your hands lift to cover your face, a sob escaping once again causing your shoulders to shake and knees to buckle. 
Friedrich’s hands are quick to capture your sides, his own knees falling with you to the ground. Shaking your head, your hands push at his arms. “No. No,” Your voice cracks and wavers. “Don’t touch me. I don’t want you to touch me!” 
He allows you to push at his arms, yet he never relents. Once your clawing and desperate attempts to push his arms away, your own arms fall slowly against your side, your cheek pressed against his chest as you continue to cry. 
His hand lifts and holds the back of your head, a small furrow to his brows as his own eyes begin to water once again. Pushing your head back with his hand, you look up at him with a shuddering chest. His head tilts as he looks at you, eyeing the loose strands of hair that stick to your cheeks. 
Lips pulled into a frown, he pushes those strands away gently. Your brows pinch together and your eyes slowly close as your head turns. His thumb presses into the corner of your mouth — a gentle, soft press. 
In another timeline, this would’ve been what you wanted — the feeling of his breath against your cheek and the nudge of his nose against yours as his lips brush over your bottom lip. 
Shaking your head, you turn it quickly and feel as his nose presses into your cheekbone now. “No. I can not do this to my sister,” You whisper. “I can not do it to you or myself,” Your voice quivers. 
“You are only hurting, Friedrich.” 
“And so are you.” He whispers. Your head turns slowly, resting your forehead against his, nudging the tip of your nose against his softly. 
“I won’t do this,” You shake your head. “I…I love you. I always have. But if I allow myself what I’ve always wanted, I’m betraying Anna. I will not allow myself to give in to you.” 
His chin quivers this time, his thumb brushing over your cheek as he stares at you quietly. Hand lifting slowly, you place it over his as your cheek leans into his rough palm slightly. 
His lips are shaky and the small laugh he lets out is more like a puff of air. “Can I stay just this one night?” He whispers. 
Staring at him quietly, your mind renders you speechless for a moment. If you say yes would you still be betraying your sister? Would that be giving in to something selfish? 
Turning your head, your lips press against his palm softly before pulling away. 
Anna. Forgive me. 
“You can stay.” 
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𓍯 ִֶָ tags; @ali-r3n — @marchsfreakshow — @sstar-ggirl — @pretty-little-mind33 — @love-quinn
𓍯 ִֶָ thank you for reading! comments, reblogs, & feedback are welcome & greatly appreciated!
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some-bunniii · 7 hours ago
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Lucifer’s Three Lessons of Touch
・❥ You don’t like to be touched—even handshakes get you sweaty, but can the charming ruler of Hell change that?
x: reader is g/n. no use of y/n.
xx: wowowoow my first inbox request!! i honestly never thought i would do one but i finally had the motivation to write a situation like this so… enjoy!
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The first time you met Lucifer, you flinched.
It wasn’t subtle, either. You physically recoiled, reeling back as if. You could still recall the shock in his crimson eyes, then the slight tilt of his head as he regarded you in front of all your friends at the hotel.
“Oh?” he had murmured, withdrawing his hand just before it could make contact with your shoulder. His crimson eyes gleamed with amusement. “Ah, I see. The rumors have gotten to you, haven’t they? Terrified I’ll smite you where you stand?”
Lucifer’s tone was teasing, but there was a curiosity beneath it, as if he was waiting to see if you’d confirm his suspicion.
Your stomach had twisted at the attention. You’d only been working at the Hazbin Hotel’s front desk for a few weeks, trying to keep your head down and do your job. 
When Charlie had offered you a position, promising you a place that felt safe, you hadn’t expected him—Lucifer Morningstar, the King of Hell himself—to be so… present.
And touchy.
Lucifer was all casual affection, all warmth and charm wrapped up in a devilishly well-dressed package. A hand at Charlie’s back, a ruffle of Vaggie’s hair, a deliberate jab to Alastor’s side when he stood in the King’s path. He was the kind of person who made contact as naturally as breathing.
Which, unfortunately, didn’t mix well with you.
You weren’t sure why you told him. Maybe it was the way he had pulled back so easily, so quickly, without a hint of offense. Maybe it was because of the curious way he watched you afterward, instead of the disgust or cruel judgment like you would have expected for the ruler of Hell.
“I don’t like being touched,” you had admitted, your fingers curling against the desk. “It’s not—it’s not you, I just—”
Lucifer had held up a hand, stopping you with a disarming smile. “Say no more, darling.” 
And he hadn’t pushed. Not once.
At first, you thought he’d forget, like he did everything. But Lucifer never forgot.
When he spoke to you, he kept an extra bit of space between you. When he passed you one of his famous, hand made rubber duckies, he set it on the desk rather than handing it directly to you. 
Even when he cracked a joke or leaned in conspiratorially, it was always within a distance you could handle.
And then, slowly, softly, after a few months of casual flirtation and shared laughter over pancakes, Lucifer started testing the waters.
The first time, it had been your hand. A particularly stressful morning had left you rubbing at your temples, exhaustion laying heavy in your bones. 
Lucifer had approached the desk, a steaming cup of invigorating tea in hand, and instead of setting it down, he very deliberately extended it toward you.
You hesitated.
“It’s not cursed,” he teased, wiggling the cup.
You huffed, but took it from him—fingers brushing, just barely, against his own. The contact lasted less than a second, but Lucifer’s grin was bright.
After that, it was gradual. The lightest press of his shoulder beside you when he leaned in to peek at your paperwork. A casual touch to your sleeve when he needed your attention. 
Never too much. Never too soon.
You weren’t sure when it happened, but one day, you realized you didn’t flinch anymore.
And then, one quiet evening in the lobby, it happened.
You had been reading, curled up in one of the oversized lounge chairs near the front desk, when Lucifer sauntered in. 
“Hard at work I see,” he mused, sliding his gaze across the empty lobby. “I’m sure everyone is aware the weight of the hotel rests on your shoulders.”
You glanced up from your book with a raised brow, already catching the glint of amusement in his unnatural eyes. “It’s my break.”
“That’s perfect!” He slid onto the cushion beside you. “Then you won’t mind me indulging for a moment.”
Then, slowly, he extended a hand. Open, palm-up, resting on the cushion between you.
An invitation. Nothing more.
Your heart hammered, but… you didn’t move away. 
Instead, cautiously, you let your fingers drift toward his. The moment your fingertips brushed his palm, Lucifer’s expression softened, his own fingers closing just enough to lightly hold yours.
“See?” he murmured, warmth seeping from his touch. “Not so bad, is it?”
You exhaled, and slowly your shoulders sank, and the tension coiled beneath your skin slowly dissipated. His hand was warm—steady, safe. Something you hadn’t felt since before arriving to this dark place.
For the first time in a long time, you didn’t want to pull away.
Lucifer didn’t move either, didn’t tighten his grip or trace circles against your skin—he simply let you be, as if this was the most natural thing in the world. 
“Not so bad,” you finally admitted, voice barely above a whisper.
Lucifer’s lips curled into something softer than his usual knowing smirk. A smile, real and warm, one that made the space between you feel smaller in a way that wasn’t suffocating, but comforting.
“I’m rather delightful to touch, you know.” Lucifer winked, tilting his black wrists closer to view. “Silky smooth, soft as sin, practically a luxury experience.”
You let out a small, breathy laugh. Of course he’d find a way to make it about himself.
“You’re impossible.”
“And yet,” he murmured, his thumb shifting just slightly against your fingers—a feather-light stroke, so brief and careful you barely noticed until it was already gone, “you’re still holding my hand.”
Your cheeks warmed, but you didn’t retreat. You could have. Lucifer would have let you. Instead, you turned your hand just a little, aligning your fingers with his.
His thumb ghosted against your knuckles, so light it was more suggestion than touch. Testing. Waiting.
Your heart skipped.
Lucifer didn’t push. He didn’t coax. He simply let you choose.
So you did.
You shifted closer, just slightly, your fingers curling tentatively around his. His expression didn’t change—still soft, still patient—but you swore his grip grew just the slightest bit firmer, just enough to make sure you knew he was there.
A long, quiet moment passed.
“I’ve been thinking…” he finally said, that playful grin twitching back onto his angelic features, “Charlie is going to be very jealous when she finds out I was your first.”
You blinked. “First…?”
“Holding hands, of course.” His smirk widened. “I’m not the only one in the family who’s fond of close contact. Unless dear Charlotte has already had the honor?”
You groaned, nudging his leg with your foot. “That’s what you’re thinking about right now?”
“What can I say?” He sighed, dramatically wistful. “I am the Sin of Pride, can’t I indulge in some while I celebrate this tender victory?”
Your lips twitched. He was incorrigible.
But… he had been patient. Gentle. Kind.
You squeezed his hand—just barely, just enough for him to know.
Lucifer stilled for half a second before his thumb traced another light, careful line along your knuckles. A silent thank you.
And, for once, the space between you didn’t feel so wide.
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That night hadn’t been the end of Lucifer’s brazen acts, either. 
If anything, it only emboldened him.
The brushes of his fingers became more frequent, the space between you ever-shrinking. A light touch at your elbow when he guided you through a crowded hall, the playful flick of a stray strand of hair when he teased you. Never too much, never unwelcome—but always there. Always him.
And then, one night, he caught you. Quite literally.
The explosion had been unexpected. A misplaced spell—Alastor’s, or maybe even Charlie’s—had sent a shockwave through the lobby, shaking the walls and rattling the grand chandelier overhead. 
You had been moving toward the front desk when it happened, but the force of the blast sent you stumbling back.
Your arms flailed, your body crashed toward the floor. Everything was moving too fast, there was no time to break the fall.
And then—Lucifer appeared at the corner of your vision.
One second, you were falling, and the next, his arms were around you. Not just bracing you—catching you.
The world tilted, a blur of motion and heat, and suddenly, you were against his chest, the scent of him—apple cider and something dark, like aged wine—filling your senses.
For a moment, neither of you moved.
His grip was like steel, an arm locked around your waist, the other bracing your back. Your hands had instinctively grasped at his coat, clutching the fine fabric between your fingers. 
And still, he didn’t let go.
“You know,” Lucifer hummed, a teasing lilt as his lips quirked upward, “for someone who claims to avoid my touch, you do seem rather comfortable in my arms.”
You scoffed, tilting your head up to glare at him—a mistake.
His pretty, i’m-so-charming-it-hurts face was close. Too close.
The smirk of Lucifer’s widened when your cheeks flushed with warmth—like he could practically feel the heat radiating between you—but there was something else beneath it, something softer in the way his crimson eyes lingered on your face.
Your breath caught.
Lucifer’s fingers curled slightly at your waist, his thumb brushing—just barely—against your ribs in a way that sent heat prickling up your spine. 
It wasn’t teasing, not entirely.
There was something else there, something unspoken in the way his grip never softened. 
His usual arrogance had quieted, his smirk tempered by something deeper, something almost hesitant.
Like the King of Hell was savoring the quiet, intimate moment. Like he wasn’t sure if he was allowed to.
“I could let go,” he offered, though his grip didn’t loosen.
You swallowed, pulse thundering. “Then why haven’t you?”
A slow grin. “You haven’t asked me to.”
The worst part?
You didn’t want to, especially when you looked up at Lucifer’s carefully guarded expression. 
As if he was waiting for you to pull away—half-expecting it, maybe. Half-dreading it.
But you didn’t. Your fingers curled slightly in the fabric of his coat.
“You’re staring,” you murmured, the words barely more than breath.
Lucifer’s lips twitched, but the usual smirk didn’t come. Instead, his thumb brushed absently against your side—a touch so light, so fleeting, that you might have imagined it.
“Can you blame me?” he murmured, so quiet you had to crane to hear. “This is a rather…captivating angle.”
And your heart skipped three beats.
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Lucifer always knew how to make things seem like a game.
It was easier that way, wasn’t it? If he made it into a joke, if he grinned just so, if he teased enough to make you roll your eyes and huff at him, then it was nothing more than harmless fun. It was just another of his indulgent amusements, just another way to pass the time.
But then there were moments like these.
Moments where he didn’t hide behind a smirk.
Moments where he was patient. Where he was watching. Where you realized, belatedly, that it had never been a game to begin with.
“…I don’t want to be bad at it,” you admitted, hating how small your voice sounded as you sat across from him. 
You were painfully aware of how small the space was between the two of you, sitting on one of the lounges in the dead of night—when everyone was to be asleep, you desperately hoped. 
Lucifer’s expression softened—not in pity, never in pity, but something else. Something like understanding, which was an emotion others did not grant you so easily when it came to your adversity to physical interaction.
“There’s no such thing,” he shook his head confidently, tilting it just slightly. “It’s not a skill that needs to be perfected, I assure you. It’s just something to be shared.”
You swallowed. “Easy for you to say.”
His lips quirked. “Oh? Do you think I was born knowing how to kiss?”
The thought made you huff. “You might as well have been. Weren’t you created to be the most beautiful angel in Heaven? Surely that was one of the reasons.”
Lucifer chuckled, his thumb brushing idly against the back of your hand. 
“No,” he murmured, “I had to learn too.”
You frowned, crossing your arms. “From who?”
His grin widened. “Wouldn’t you like to know?”
You groaned, smacking his arm lightly, and he laughed. But then, after a moment, he let the mirth fade, his voice softening once more.
“I learned the same way I’m offering to teach you now.” His fingers tightened slightly around yours. “With patience. With trust.”
You hesitated, heart beating a little too fast. “And if I do it wrong?”
“There is no wrong.” He lifted his free hand, cupping your jaw gently. “There’s only what you like and what you don’t. And we can stop the moment you want to, understand?”
You nodded.
He smiled. “Then come here.”
You sucked in a quiet breath, then shifted closer, tilting your face up toward his.
Lucifer didn’t rush. He let you take your time, let you hover just close enough that you could feel the warmth of his breath against your skin. 
Then, when you finally worked up the nerve to bridge that last inch without shivering at what was to come, he met you there.
The kiss was light at first, just a simple press, the barest brush of lips against lips. He let you test the feeling, let you adjust, let you decide.
And when you, ever so tentatively, kissed him again, he smiled against your mouth.
“See?” he murmured, sweet breath fanning your lips. “You’re already quite good at it.”
You weren’t sure if that was true.
But when he kissed you again—slower, deeper, his fingers cradling your face like something precious—you found that, for once, you didn’t really care.
You weren’t sure how long you stayed like that, lost in the quiet, careful press of lips and the soft sighs exchanged between you. But then—
A noise. A clatter, followed by a small gasp.
You broke apart instantly, your heart leaping into your throat as you turned toward the kitchen doors across the lobby. 
And there, standing in the dim light of the hall, barefoot in her pajamas with a bowl of something precariously balanced in her hands, was Charlie.
She blinked, her eyes going comically wide. Your lips parted, and you sputtered on air, desperately searching for something—anything—to use as an excuse. 
‘Sorry, Charlie! Your dad was just checking for something in my teeth!…Rather closely…’ you thought of blurting.
Lucifer didn’t look surprised, but he definitely looked as if he had been caught red-handed with the sheepish smile growing across his face.
Sweat beaded on your brow, your eyes flicked from Lucifer to Charlie’s shocked expression, and when you finally got the courage, you—
“Yes!”
Charlie fist-pumped the air, and you gawked. What?
The princess practically vibrated in place, clutching her bowl of whatever midnight snack she’d been after. “I knew it! I knew something was going on! Oh my gosh, does this mean you’re together now? Or—wait—was that your first kiss?!”
Your soul nearly left your body (again). “Charlie—”
She gasped dramatically, bouncing on her heels. “It was! Oh, this is so much better than popcorn!”
Lucifer chuckled, clearly enjoying himself far too much with his chest swelling at the attention, while you were debating if it was possible to melt into the furniture and disappear entirely.
Charlie grinned at your flustered expression before finally stilling with a grin. “Okay, okay, I’ll go—but this is officially my new favorite thing.” 
She spun on her heel, heading for the hallway, but not before shooting you both finger guns. “Carry on, lovebirds!”
And with that, she was gone, leaving behind only the sound of your mortification.
You slumped back into the couch, groaning into your hands. “I’m never going to live this down.”
Lucifer, far too pleased, slowly lifted your hand to his lips, then placed a tender kiss on your knuckle. “It wasn’t so bad, was it?” 
You sighed, the fight leaving you as you let your hand rest in his. “No… never with you.”
Lucifer smirked before he leaned in closer, and your breath hitched. “Good, because this time won't be the last.”
Hell… you hoped he was right.
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hi!!! how have you all been doing? i’ve missed you guys!! this was a sweet idea to play around with, and i hope i’ve still got a feel for luci’s characterization while i’ve been away 🫶
let me know your thoughts :)
tags 🏷️
@ohnoivefallen @doodlebob2726 @coleisyn @undertale-is-sansational @mixplara @chewbrry @yellowsubiesdance @airwolf92 @lxkeee @jellybellyrulez @catnoirsleftnut @mbruben-stein @moonlovers34 @just-trash-yeah-thats-it @wings-of-sapphire @enigmatic-blues @bethleeham @blue122 @cherry-4200 @azullynx @luzzbuzz @for-hearthand-home @helluvapoison @th3-st4r-gur1 @concentratedconcrete @cimadreamer @maxiskindahere @purplerose291 @fictional-character-whore @0willowwisp0 @yourlocalgoldenretrieverboy @wpdarlingpan @halo-balo @chipper-chip @lvstyangel @acrazyartist @midorichoco @ivebeenthearchersstuff @indestructeible @otherthoughtsofbu @anonymousewrites @watchinthestarz @mechanicalmari @luxmessorem @cherry-cola-100 @the-shark-named-sharon @rae-pottah @corpsebridenightamare @pweewee @nijiru
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moeitsu · 2 days ago
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The Dark Tide Siren!Arthur Morgan x Reader Modern AU Ch 7 - Bound Beneath a Sirens Song Summary: With a storm looming on the horizon, the air crackles with an undeniable energy—every moment, every touch is charged like lightning waiting to strike. When Arthur invites you to take a swim, how could you possibly refuse? After all, it’s just a swim... what harm could come from that? wc: 11k tw: none! Swim Back! ↞ ﹏𓊝﹏ ↠ Sail Ahead!
AN: Longer chapter, got a little carried away. But reader finally gets to kissy on her fishy :3 (also like 80% of this takes place underwater, so pls don’t read too much into the logic of it)
tag list: @photo1030 @v3lv3tf0x @ireallyhonestlydontcare @shygamergirl01 @cloudywithachanceofcrisis @sevikaspuertoricanwife @abducted-cowz @ilovethatforyousworld @gatodebiquini @onyxlune @bomdada
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I was searching for trouble and I knew it
The pull toward him was undeniable, like the tide dragging me into deeper waters, and I wasn’t sure I wanted to fight it. There were a thousand reasons why I should pack up my things and head home, but none of them were strong enough to make me leave. Every day, his voice echoed in the back of my mind, a secret siren song ringing in my ears, impossible to ignore.
I told myself this was an adventure—something new, something extraordinary. When in my life would I ever experience something like this again? But deep down, I knew it was more than that. He wasn’t just some fascinating creature to be studied, he was a person. A complicated, intriguing, wonderful person who had been through hell and somehow still found the strength to trust. Over the past week, I had watched him transform before my eyes, shedding his fear and anger like an old skin. Seeing that change unfold lit something warm and dangerous in my chest.
I knew I was going down with this ship, but I refused to raise the white flag in surrender. 
Not when he had come so far. Not when I had seen the way his shoulders relaxed when he listened to Mary-Beth ramble about her favorite books, or how he watched Tilly’s hands with quiet fascination as she scribbled down notes and hypotheses, pausing only to tap her pen against her lip in thought. He was still wary of the men, his trust slower to form, but he was trying. And that effort—it meant everything.
Tilly pestered him with inquisitive, practical questions, always seeking to unravel the mysteries of his existence. She wanted to know what he remembered about his mother, about his people, about the depths of the ocean he had never been free to explore. She wanted to see his lights up close, to hear the cadence of his native tongue, to piece together the puzzle of his biology with a scientific curiosity. At first, Arthur was hesitant, his answers clipped, wary. But I was always there with them, and at times, it felt like he looked to me for permission. A gentle smile, a small nod, and his face would soften just slightly, his bioluminescence flickering to life.
It was as if I was telling him, Go ahead. You’re safe to be yourself here.
Mary-Beth, on the other hand, was smitten with his personality. She had a habit of chatting his ear off, switching from one topic to another with the ease of someone who never ran out of things to say. She talked about her love for writing, about her life back at college, and the not-so-secret crush she had on a certain fisherman at the facility. And Arthur—he listened. Really listened. He hung onto every word, his curiosity evident in the way he tilted his head, the way he asked his own questions. It was clear that as much as we were fascinated by him, he was just as eager to understand us.
And for the first time in his life, he was free to learn without the shadow of pain and fear looming over him.
It was the end of the week. The summer sun was sinking low in the sky, bathing the outdoor section of Arthur’s tank in molten gold. The facility had closed to the public not too long ago, and the girls would need to head home soon. The warm eastern wind carried the briny scent of the ocean, filling my lungs with something grounding, something familiar.
I, for one, did not plan on leaving with them.
There was a part of me that longed to dive into the unknown. To explore someone who, in ways I couldn’t yet explain, felt just a little bit like me. Every day, the pull had grown stronger, the ache sharper. I wasn’t sure if it was curiosity or something more—but tonight, I could no longer ignore it.
Mary-Beth was carefully braiding a section of Arthur’s sandy blond hair, her fingers moving with practiced ease as she wove small strands together. Arthur sat comfortably with his elbows resting on the platform, arms crossed as his long tail floated lazily in the water, the gentle sway of it almost hypnotic. Tilly, stretching her legs with a sigh, checked the time before nudging Mary-Beth.
“We better get moving. My mom doesn’t like when I’m late for dinner.”
Mary-Beth groaned dramatically, her lips forming an exaggerated pout. “Oh, come on, Tilly. It’s Friday! We’re young adults—we should be spending our weekends staying out late, having fun! Can’t we stay with Arthur a little longer?”
“Ouch, guess I’m just chopped liver,” I muttered with a laugh, shaking my head. Though, in truth, I didn’t really mind that they preferred Arthur’s company. Because it meant I got to spend time with him too.
Arthur chuckled, the deep sound vibrating through his chest as he gave them a reassuring smile. “It’s not like I’ll be going anywhere,” he said, amusement dancing in his glowing blue eyes. “We can pick up where we left off when you girls come back. Go home, get some rest—study up on those science books so you can teach this old fool some new tricks.” He added a playful wink, making Mary-Beth giggle as she gathered her things.
I stood as they did, walking them to the door, dragging my feet ever so slightly. The anticipation in my chest was a restless thing.
And then, finally—the door shut behind them with a heavy thud. Their footsteps echoed down the hallway, growing softer until they disappeared completely.
And just like that, it was just us.
Arthur and I.
This was what I had been waiting for all week—just a moment alone with him, without the others, without distraction. But now that it was here, now that the opportunity had fallen right into my lap, I wasn’t exactly sure what to do with myself.
I wanted to talk to him, to ask him questions, to know him in ways no one else had. But I had already spent every day listening to his stories, absorbing the pieces of himself he was willing to share with the others. And yet, there were still so many things I desired to know. More personal, more intimate details about his life that I had no business prying into.
I was so lost in my own thoughts that I barely registered the way Arthur tilted his head at me, eyes searching mine.
“You alright, darlin’?”
The smooth timbre of his voice pulled me back to the present, washing over me like the tide pulling in.
I blinked, offering a small smile. “Yeah, I was just thinking.” I hesitated for half a second before adding, “Mind if I hang out for a bit?”
His eyes lit up, and it wasn’t just the setting sun catching in the water.
“Sure,” he said, shifting slightly as he regarded me. “This ain’t gonna get you in trouble, though, right?”
He had a point. There was no reason for me to stay after hours. But surely, I wasn’t breaking any rules. Not really.
I smirked. “Only if I get caught.”
Arthur huffed out a laugh, the sound warm and familiar, as if we had known each other for years instead of days. I realized just how much I needed to know him. Not as some scientific marvel, not as a myth brought to life.
But as Arthur.
As I moved toward the edge of the ledge, letting my legs dangle in the water, Arthur followed without hesitation. It was as if we were tethered by some invisible thread, an unspoken pull drawing us together. He stopped just before reaching me, lingering in that space between caution and longing, his hesitation palpable. I could see the gears turning in his mind—how close is too close?
I reached out, offering my hand in a silent invitation. And when he took it, I felt the warmth of his palm against mine despite the coolness of the water. He pressed himself against my legs, his chest firm and solid, his heartbeat strong beneath my skin. Wet arms came to rest on my thighs, soaking through my shorts, but I barely noticed. The moment was too charged, too fragile, as his gills fluttered against my legs, I parted them slightly as if breathing him into my embrace.
He was so close now. Close enough that I could study every detail of his face—the faint scar hidden beneath his short beard, the dimple at the base of his nose, the way his lashes curled like delicate brushstrokes. Freckles dusted his cheeks and shoulders like constellations etched into his skin, mapping stories I would never fully know. His second eyelids, faint but visible, reflected the soft light filtering through the water, a feature evolved to protect his irises, and yet, he still looked at me with such openness. His lips were smooth, and when he parted them, I caught the glint of sharp teeth, a stark contrast to the tenderness in his gaze.
Content had settled over his handsome rugged features. 
“Arthur.” His name slipped from my lips, quiet but sincere. And before I could stop myself, the question that had been lodged in my heart finally surfaced. “Are you happy here?”
I felt him tense, his body stilling against mine. He took a slow, measured breath, but there was no avoidance in his gaze, no flicker of hesitation. Only the truth.
“Happy is... a foreign word to me,” he admitted, his voice carrying the weight of a lifetime of uncertainty. “I like it here, but it’s not exactly what I’d call… home.”
The word sounded strange coming from him, like he was tasting it for the first time, unsure of its meaning. My chest ached.
“It’s a bit lonely when you’re all workin’,” he continued, his voice quieter now. “Quiet. But it’s a nice feelin’, like I can just be.” He shrugged, as if that small solace was enough, as if it didn’t matter.
A sigh escaped my throat before I could swallow it. “I’m sorry, Arthur, I wish there—”
“Don’t,” he cut in, his tone firm but not unkind. “You’ve got nothin’ to apologize for, sweetheart. You’ve given me more freedom than I’ve ever tasted in my whole miserable life.”
I smiled at that, but it was a poor attempt to mask the tightness in my chest. I wanted to do more for him. I wanted to erase every wound, every scar of his past. Show him true happiness, not just some artificial slice of freedom. 
“Besides,” a slow, knowing grin tugged at his lips, revealing more of those sharp teeth. “If you had never brought me here, I never would’ve met you.”
His hand—webbed, calloused, yet impossibly gentle—lifted to my face, his fingertips tracing the curve of my cheek with aching reverence. Like he was afraid I might dissolve beneath his touch, fade into the air like seafoam.
“And I’m happy when I’m with you.”
The words settled between us, sinking into my bones, heavy and undeniable. I should have said something back. Should have acknowledged what was happening between us.
But I couldn’t. Because if I did, I wasn’t sure I’d ever be able to pull myself away.
Arthur held my gaze for what felt like an eternity, a storm of emotions swirling between us like the eye of a cyclone—hot and cold currents colliding, the pressure building, pulling us into a dance neither of us dared to break free from. It was unspoken, this tether between us, but I felt it with every pounding heartbeat, with every inch that closed between our bodies.
“Would you swim with me, my girl?”
My breath caught. The words barely registered, not because I hadn’t heard them, but because of the way he said them.
My girl.
It rolled off his tongue so effortlessly, like it was already a truth neither of us had acknowledged yet. My stomach twisted, and a rush of warmth bloomed across my cheeks under the golden light of the setting sun. Arthur watched me, eyes shimmering with mischief, but there was something else there too—something deeper, something that sent a shiver down my spine.
“S-swim?” I squeaked, my voice barely above a whisper.
Arthur chuckled, the sound low and rich, like I had just recoiled from something ridiculous—like he had asked me to eat a raw sea urchin instead of simply taking a swim. “Yeah. If you can ignore the sharks and stingrays, it’s practically paradise,” he teased, tugging at my hands as if I might just leap in fully clothed without a second thought.
The meaning of his request finally sank in. My pulse kicked up a notch. This wasn’t what I had planned when I stayed behind with him, wasn’t how I thought I’d fill my time. I had imagined more talking, maybe more of those easy laughs he shared with the girls. But this—this was something different. Something thrilling.
I’d be in the water with him. In his natural element.
A voice in the back of my head stirred, whispering a reminder of what Lenny had said about siren courtship. His bioluminescence, the purring, the gift-giving—he’s in mating season.
I shot those thoughts straight to hell.
This wasn’t about that. This was just swimming. Nothing more. Nothing dangerous. What harm could be done?
Right? Right. 
A grin broke across my face, excitement bubbling in my chest as I practically sprang to my feet.
“I’ll go change into my wetsuit.”
* ‧̍̊˙· 𓆝.° 。˚𓆛˚。 °.𓆞 ·˙‧̍̊ *
I bounded down the corridor, my heartbeat matching the quick, eager rhythm of my steps. Excitement thrummed in my veins, bubbling up inside me until it felt like I might burst. This is happening. I could barely contain myself, giddy at the thought of what was to come. To see Arthur as he was meant to be—in the water, in his element. To watch the way the water broke for him, how effortlessly he moved, commanding the space with just the flick of his powerful tail. The thought sent shivers down my spine, a thrill unlike anything I had ever known.
I was so lost in the fantasy that I didn’t notice the electrical closet door swinging open until I nearly barreled straight into a solid chest.
“Woah!”
Hands gripped my shoulders to steady me, and I blinked up to find John staring down at me, brows raised in surprise. “Hey, uhm—didn’t realize you were still here…you going for a swim or something?” His gaze flickered down to my wetsuit, to the towel in my hands, then toward the hallway that led to Arthur’s tank. His expression shifted, concern knitting his features. “Shit, is Arthur alright? Did something happen?”
I let out a breathy laugh, shaking my head. Just like John to assume the worst. He always played it cool, pretended not to give a shit, but deep down, I knew better. The fool had a heart bigger than his ego—not that he’d ever admit it.
“Arthur’s fine,” I assured him quickly. “I’m just… going for a little swim. That’s all.”
John’s eyebrows shot up, but before he could grill me on why exactly I was voluntarily diving into the water with a half-siren, I cut in.
“What are you still doing here, anyway? You hate working late on Fridays.”
He sighed, exhaustion lacing his tone as he rubbed the back of his neck. “Hosea asked me to check on the generators. Since we got that big storm coming this weekend.”
Right. The hurricane. I had been so wrapped up in Arthur, in my own tangled emotions, that I had almost forgotten.
“Oh, right. Hurricane Eliza.” I rocked back on my heels, clutching the towel to my chest, suddenly feeling exposed. “I heard she’s gonna be a real beast.” I tried not to sound uninterested, but all I really wanted to do was turn back to Arthur. 
John hummed in agreement, but his eyes lingered on me a beat too long, as if he could see straight through my flimsy attempt at nonchalance.
A quiet laugh rumbled from his chest. “Yeah, uh—I guess I’ll leave you to it then.”
He turned, heading back down the hallway, but not before shooting me that look. The one that said he wasn’t buying it.
“John! Uh…” I swallowed hard, nerves creeping back up my spine. Why did I feel like I was a child getting away with something? “Please keep this between us. I-I’m just—” I fumbled for the right words. Just what? Just going for a swim? Then why did it feel like I had been caught sneaking off to do something much more nefarious?
John smirked, dragging a finger across his lips like he was sealing them shut. “Your secret’s safe with me. Have fun with your shark boyfriend.”
I scoffed, rolling my eyes. “He’s not—”
John was already strolling away, ignoring my rebuttal. “If he tries anything, I’ll gut his ass personally,” he called over his shoulder, his voice echoing down the corridor. 
I laughed, shaking my head. “Think I’ll take my chances, Marston. Seeing as you still can’t swim!”
Without turning around, he raised a middle finger in the air.
Grinning to myself, I clutched my towel a little tighter and turned toward the hallway that led to Arthur’s tank. My heart pounded for an entirely different reason now. This was finally happening.
The moment I stepped onto the platform, my heart clenched with a brief flicker of doubt. Would he still be as eager now that I was actually here? But before that worry could take root, the surface of the water broke, and Arthur emerged with effortless grace, resting his arms on the ledge like he had been waiting for me all night.
“Took you long enough,” he teased, his voice a low rumble beneath the gentle crashing of the waves beyond the facility. “Was startin’ to worry you changed your mind.”
I grinned, shaking my head as I tossed my towel onto a plastic chair. “Like I’d pass up this opportunity,” I mused, reaching for my flippers. “Spoke too soon about getting caught. Ran into John in the hallway.”
Arthur hummed in acknowledgment, but his attention was already elsewhere. I followed his gaze down to my feet, watching the way his expression softened with curiosity. Slowly, he reached out, his webbed fingers glistening under the golden light as they ghosted over my ankle.
I stilled as he lifted my foot slightly, his thumb brushing over the sharp ridge of ankle bone before gliding downward in a slow, deliberate motion. When the back of his claw traced up the arch of my foot, I couldn't help the quiet giggle that escaped me, my toes curling instinctively.
Arthur's eyes flicked up at the sound, his lips twitching with amusement before he focused back on my foot, turning it this way and that as if studying an artifact he couldn’t quite make sense of.
“Why do you wear these?” he asked, finally shifting his attention to the flipper I had yet to put on. He tapped the stiff rubber with his claw, brows furrowing.
I chuckled, slipping the other one on. “They’re flippers. I can’t swim like you do. My feet aren’t smooth or streamlined, and I don’t have the muscles like you.”
Arthur’s lips parted slightly as he mouthed the word to himself. “Flippers,” he repeated, testing the sound on his tongue before looking back at me. “So these make you more like me?”
His question sent a strange warmth through my chest. There was something so earnest in the way he asked, his fingers trailing along the length of the fin as if he were trying to understand what it meant for me to move through his world.
“Essentially, yes,” I murmured, a small smile playing at my lips. “They’ll help me keep up with you.”
Arthur let out an exaggerated snort, giving me a pointed look. “Darlin’, that’s a bold statement.”
Grinning, I kicked my foot out of the water, sending a spray into the air. He flinched slightly, watching the droplets rain down before glaring at the stiff black rubber with playful disdain.
“That’s just insulting.”
I laughed, adjusting the strap on my other flipper before sliding a pair of goggles over my forehead. Arthur cocked a brow, tilting his head as he eyed them.
“Ain’t even gonna ask,” he huffed, but then his tone shifted, growing more serious. “How long can you hold your breath?”
The change in his voice sent a shiver down my spine. The playful banter faded, replaced by something quieter—something deeper.
I swallowed, my fingers tightening around the edge of the platform. How long could I hold my breath? I was about to dive into his world, a place where he was strong, fast, in control. The thought sent my pulse skittering, but I forced a steady breath, meeting his gaze head-on.
“Less than a minute,” I admitted, though I knew it was probably closer to thirty seconds.
Arthur took in the information with a slow nod, his ocean-blue gaze flickering downward to the depths of the tank. The water reflected against his skin in shifting ribbons of light, making him look even more otherworldly. “Just stay close to me, alright?”
I didn’t need to be told twice.
Pulling my goggles over my eyes and nose, I inhaled deeply, letting my lungs expand before slipping off the ledge. The cool water embraced me instantly, a rush of sensation flooding my senses as the world above blurred into nothingness.
And then, through the clearing bubbles, there he was.
Arthur moved—no, glided—with an effortless grace that no human could ever hope to match. The full arc of his powerful tail cut through the water like a blade, propelling him forward with a strength that sent ripples cascading outward. The bioluminescent blues and purples that traced his scales shimmered like stardust, catching the fractured light that filtered down from above. His tail fin, a broad, elegant half-moon, unfurled behind him with each movement, undulating like the slow, hypnotic pulse of a jellyfish. The way it rippled through the currents, fluid and weightless, was mesmerizing—a dance like the ocean itself was draped in silk.
For the first time, I was seeing him as he was meant to be. Free. Powerful. Impossible. A gateway into a world unknown. He belonged to nobody, and no man. 
His sandy blond hair drifted around his face in feathery strands, framing the rugged lines of his features, softening the sharp edges of his jaw and cheekbones. His gills flexed slightly, expelling a faint trail of bubbles as he moved, blending into the swirling currents. And then there was his smile—devastating, knowing, teasing. It was the kind of smile that made the world tilt, that made my stomach tighten with something warm.
He belonged here, in the water, in the vastness. And yet, as his ocean-blue eyes met mine, glowing faintly beneath the surface, I couldn’t help but feel that, somehow, in this moment—he belonged with me, too.
Arthur reached for me, and without hesitation, I took his hand.
Webbed fingers curled around mine, warm even in the cold water, and with the smallest tug, he guided me deeper. The tank transformed before my eyes—the artificial world of rock formations and coral structures now seemed vast and infinite from this new perspective. Schools of fish darted past us in flashes of silver, weaving effortlessly through the currents.
But I couldn’t take my eyes off him.
Arthur twisted effortlessly, rolling onto his back so he could watch me, his tail propelling him smoothly as I floated just above him. Watching me with that same toothy, teasing grin. 
I kicked my feet, feeling the resistance of the water as my flippers sliced through it, but it was nothing compared to the sheer power he held in every movement. His tail moved in slow, deliberate strokes, adjusting his speed with fluent precision, allowing me to drift above.
I suddenly wished I had a tail like his—to feel the strength coiling in my muscles, to move through the water with that same primal ease. To command the currents as if they were an extension of myself. But I was clumsy in comparison, merely paddling while he swam with the mastery of something born from the deep. And yet, he didn’t seem to mind. If anything, he looked amused, watching me with a quiet adoration, like I was the marvel here—not him.
For the first time in my life, I felt truly weightless. Suspended in the water, drifting between reality and something almost dreamlike, I had never felt so free. Despite the vastness around us, Arthur was the only thing keeping me tethered.
Then my chest tightened. A sharp, familiar burn spread through my lungs. Shit. Has it been a minute already?
With my free hand, I pointed to the surface, signaling to Arthur that I needed air. But instead of guiding me upward, he pulled us deeper. My stomach dropped. A chill slithered down my spine as his grip on my hand remained firm. What is he doing?
I tugged, trying to free myself, but his hold only tightened. Panic began to set in, my heart hammering wildly in my chest. No… No, no, no! My limbs burned, my body screaming for oxygen. The water suddenly felt too thick, too heavy. It was crushing me, swallowing me whole. 
He shook his head.
A bolt of horror shot through me. No? What the fuck do you mean, NO?!
Was this some kind of sick game? Had I been a fool to trust him? My mind raced with a thousand possibilities, each one darker than the last. What if I had just made a terrible mistake? What if everything we shared had been a lie? What if Arthur wasn’t what I thought he was?
Was he going to kill me? Am I going to drown? 
Just as the last ounce of my strength gave way, just as I thought I was about to give in to the burning need to draw breath and fill my lungs with water, Arthur pulled me against his chest. I expected him to kick his tail sending us upward, to break the surface in a powerful burst. He had asked how long I could hold my breath, surely that wasn't to plan my demise in a timely fashion.  
But instead, he did something I never could have anticipated.
His hands came up to cradle my face, his touch gentle even as I writhed against him. His bioluminescent veins pulsed with soft light, a delicate glow between us. His eyes, deep and steady, locked onto mine, silently urging me to trust him. But my mind was blind with panic, lungs burning as they gave out. 
Then he leaned in and pressed his mouth to mine.
A kiss? Now? My mind screamed at me to pull away, to fight, to swim for the surface before it was too late. I felt it crawling under my skin, a desperate need for air or I was going to die!
I gasped but instead of choking, instead of water rushing into my lungs—
I breathed.
A rush of oxygen filled my chest, sharp and startling, like drawing the first breath of life. Arthur's lips parted against mine, his tongue slipping past in a way that was less about hunger and more about necessity. He was giving me his breath, sharing something vital and instinctual, something so intimate it sent a shiver down my spine and ignited each of my nerves in white hot fire.
I inhaled, my fingers digging into his shoulders as I clung to him, taking in the air he offered me in desperate, greedy gulps. My lungs burned, but not from lack of oxygen—it was the lingering ache of panic, the rawness of fear ebbing away, replaced by something deeper. Something calming. 
Relief. Arthur never meant to let me drown. He was never going to harm me. I silently cursed myself for not trusting him. But this was something I never would have expected. 
The rhythm came naturally after a few moments. A slow, controlled exchange. Breathe in. Hold. Breathe out. Arthur matched me, his chest expanding against mine, his gills flaring as he cycled the air between us. Drawing in enough breath for both our lungs. Somewhere in my frantic attempt to survive, my goggles had been pulled off, floating aimlessly somewhere behind me. 
Now, nothing separated us. No barrier, no confusion. Just the warmth of his lips and the steady strength of his body as he held me in place. His breath kissing every pore. 
My arms wound around his neck instinctively, fingers tangling in his billowing hair. I could feel the powerful ripple of his muscles as he kept us suspended in the water, his tail moving in slow, effortless sweeps. His veins pulsed softly beneath his skin, casting an ethereal glow between us. It was mesmerizing, hypnotic even. 
I consumed him like a fire that devours, drawing him in deeper. Seizing his lifeforce. Claiming it as my own. Taking. 
The air he breathed into me was unlike anything I had ever tasted. It was liberating, pure—like petrichor. When the earth is warm with rain-soaked soil after a summer storm. Rich and electric and unmistakably him. It filled every aching part of me, chased away the fear, replaced it with something that left me dizzy.
This wasn’t just survival. This was something else entirely.
Arthur wasn’t just giving me air—he was threading himself into the very fabric of my being.
With every inhale, he poured into me like the tide rushing into a hollowed-out cave, filling the spaces I didn’t even realize were empty. A piece of him—vast, ancient, and arcane—flooded through my heart, echoing through its chambers, coursing through my veins in a heady, intoxicating rush. It curled into the hollows of my lungs, wove through the sinew of my muscles, and settled deep into my skin. Clinging to me like the saltwater after it dries.
It wasn’t just breath. It was him.
He invaded me, not with force, but with something far more meaningful—an offering, a communion. A sacrifice. Reaching inside me his presence wrapped around my very cells, touching every inch of me in ways I had never imagined. It was like swallowing starlight, like sinking into the depths of the ocean and becoming part of it, losing myself to something endless and infinite.
I felt the ocean’s pulse, a steady rhythm thrumming through me. It was life, boundless and eternal. And gods above, it was mighty.
With each exhale, he didn’t pull away—he gave as much as I would take. As much as I needed to calm my thundering pulse. Traces of him held me, saturating my body with something more than air. He left himself in the marrow of my bones, in the pulse of my wrists, in the spaces between each heartbeat.
I was no longer just breathing. I was becoming. 
Somewhere in the tangled mess of our situation, I hadn’t noticed Arthur bringing me back to the surface. When we finally broke through, the rush of cool ocean air kissed my cheeks, sending a shudder through me. I felt like I had just stolen something forbidden, something ancient—like I had partaken in a divine secret that was never meant for human hands. As if I had slipped past the gods unnoticed, grasping at eternity, daring to hold onto something beyond biology, beyond comprehension.
And still, despite the overwhelming weight of what had just happened between us, my instincts took over. I gasped for breath, gulping down fresh air, grounding myself in reality—even as I mourned the loss of that impossible intimacy. I pushed myself back onto the platform, slumping onto my back with a heavy huff, my limbs trembling from the lingering adrenaline. I barely registered Arthur rising beside me, his own chest rising and falling in deep, measured breaths.
Poor thing. I really did steal the breath from his lungs. Literally.
The thought sent a dizzy rush through me. Had I gotten too carried away? Had I taken too much? I wasn’t even sure what too much meant in this situation. My mind reeled as I tried to make sense of it, to unravel the impossibility of what we had just shared.
“Holy shit,” I exhaled, still trying to steady my racing heart. “Arthur, why didn’t you tell me you could do that? I thought you were trying to drown me!”
I pushed up onto my elbows, my gaze locking onto his face as he hovered in the water between my legs. He looked just as disoriented as I felt, the glow in his veins pulsing slow and steady, like the aftershocks of something neither of us could fully comprehend. He blinked up at me, his gills fluttering slightly as if he was still catching his breath, too.
“M’sorry,” he murmured, his voice softer now, more careful. “I asked how long you could hold your breath… I—I thought you knew what I was doin’. I never meant to scare ya, sweetheart.”
His eyes held nothing but sincerity, and yet I still couldn’t believe what I was hearing.
“How the hell was I supposed to know that?” The words came out sharper than I intended, my emotions still tangled up in the lingering panic.
Arthur flinched—not physically, but I saw the way something in him pulled back, just slightly. The guilt in his expression sent a pang of regret through my chest. He truly hadn’t meant to frighten me.
“I thought humans did it all the time,” he admitted, scratching at the back of his head. “I’ve seen ‘em press their mouths together, sharin’ breath. Never really understood why, though… Since you’ve got plenty of it up here.” He waved a webbed hand through the air as if the concept itself was baffling to him.
This caught my attention. I stared at him, dumbfounded, my heart giving an odd little stutter. Oh, Arthur. I sat up fully now, moving closer to the edge as his words sank in. He’d seen humans do it before? It took a moment for it to click, for realization to dawn over me like the slow crest of a wave. Oh. He’d seen humans kiss.
“Oh, honey, that’s not—” I hesitated, rubbing my temples with a sigh. How the hell do I even explain this to him? “It’s not the same when humans do it,” I tried again, my voice softer now. “We’re not actually sharing breath. Not like that… not like what we just did.”
Arthur tilted his head, his brows knitting together in confusion. He was trying to understand, I could see that much, but I was probably upending his entire perception of human behavior in real-time.
“Then… why do you do it?”
I let out a slow breath, trying to piece it together in a way that made sense. “It’s called kissing. It’s a way humans express affection. Like a silent conversation… a way to say things without words—like ‘I care about you,’ or ‘I want to be close to you.’” My fingers curled against the damp fabric of my wetsuit. “When two people press their mouths together, they’re sharing a connection, and sometimes…” My voice faltered, realization creeping up on me as the words formed on my tongue. Gods above. It hit me that we had just done practically the same thing. “...sometimes even a little piece of their soul.”
Arthur was completely still. His eyes, dark and fathomless, locked onto mine like the pull of the tide, widening ever so slightly as his pupils expanded. A shiver ran through me, the weight of his gaze so intense it felt like he could see straight into my core.
Then, as if drawn by some unseen force, he moved closer.
The water rippled gently around his body, his movements slow, deliberate. He mirrored the way we had sat together earlier, but this time, he braced his hands on either side of me, his arms caging me in a way that sent a deep warmth curling in my stomach. The space between us was nonexistent, the air suddenly thick, charged with something I couldn’t quite name.
“Kissing…” Arthur repeated the word, barely more than a murmur, tasting it on his tongue.
I could almost see the gears turning in his mind, the way he was processing everything I’d just said. And I knew, with startling certainty, that he was thinking the same thing I was.
What we shared underwater… was far deeper, far more intimate than any human kiss could ever be.
“Yes, kissing.” My voice came out softer than I intended, and I swallowed against the sudden tightness in my throat. Fuck, why did I feel so nervous? He was so close I could taste the salt on his breath, feel the warmth radiating from his skin despite the cool water between us. Those deep, knowing eyes never left mine, watching me like he could read every thought flickering through my mind.
“Th-there’s many different ways to kiss,” I went on, my voice betraying my nerves. Why the hell am I even telling him this? “It’s not always on the lips. You can kiss pretty much anywhere on the body.”
His pupils dilated slightly, the dark pools nearly eclipsing the striking blue of his irises. “Anywhere?” His voice had dropped an octave, rougher, like sea water pulling back before a crashing wave.
I nodded, feeling heat creep up my neck. “And it’s not always between partners. Parents kiss their children, relatives kiss their loved ones, some people kiss their pets.” My fingers fidgeted, he was so close now I could feel the smoothness of his chest as he drew breath. “You can even blow a kiss.”
Arthur’s brow furrowed slightly, his expression shifting from something unreadable to pure confusion. “Why would someone do that?”
A soft giggle bubbled up my throat, his curiosity catching me off guard in the best way. “People do it when they’re beyond each other's reach. A way of sending your affection through the air.”
Feeling emboldened, I reached for his hand—broad, webbed, strong but gentle beneath my touch. His skin was cool and smooth, glistening in the fading light. Slowly, I lifted his arm and guided the back of his hand toward my lips.
“When you blow someone a kiss, you have to bring it to life before letting it go,” I explained, my voice barely above a whisper. Then, without breaking eye contact, I pressed a slow, deliberate kiss to the wet space of his palm, exaggerating the smacking sound just enough to tease him.
Arthur went completely still.
I felt the tension coil in his muscles, the way his fingers twitched slightly against my own. When I pulled away, my eyes flickered to his face—and oh. His cheeks were tinted a deeper shade of pink, a faint but undeniable flush creeping along his cheekbones. Was he… blushing?
I bit my lip, suppressing a grin as warmth curled in my chest. I had just made him blush.
Arthur blinked, looking between his hand and my face like he was trying to make sense of what had just happened, like he was trying to feel something beyond the physical sensation lingering on his skin.
“There,” I said proudly, admiring my work as if I had just painted something delicate and unseen across his palm. “Now, you blow it away.”
I gently turned his hand toward the ocean, the sky now fading to a deepening indigo as the sun traded shifts with the moon. The first stars flickered to life above us, their distant glow reflecting in the water, shimmering against Arthur’s iridescent skin. Then, slowly, I blew on his palm, a soft breath carrying the invisible gift away.
Arthur inhaled sharply. His gills flared at the gesture, pulsing with some unspoken emotion.
I released his hand, but instead of pulling away, he brought it to my face. A breath hitched in my throat as the rough pad of his thumb traced over my bottom lip, dragging slowly, reverently. The touch was featherlight, but I felt it everywhere.
His fingers trembled slightly. His eyes burned with something deeper than curiosity now—an insatiable hunger, a deep, aching longing.
I heard him swallow before he spoke, his voice barely rising above the whisper of the roaring waves, rich and weighted, like he was holding himself back. “…and where does the kiss go?”
The words rolled over me, sweeping me into the depth of his need. Arthur’s gaze searched mine, pupils blown wide, his entire body coiled with restrained tension. We were already so close that I could feel the warmth of his breath, hear the tremble in his voice.
“To someone you love.”
It mattered little to me which one of us closed the distance—only that we did. The moment our lips met, the world fell away, as if time itself had paused to bear witness. The moon, ever watchful, seemed to still the tides, holding her breath in quiet admiration, offering her silent blessing.
Arthur kissed me with an aching slowness, as if savoring something precious, something fragile. His lips were warm, firm but yielding, and impossibly gentle. Nothing like before—when he was breathing life into me. No, this was different. This was the slow unraveling of restraint, the surrender to something we had long denied. The intertwining of unspoken desire, of aching need.
The ship was sinking. And I finally raised the white flag.
A shiver ran through me as I brushed my tongue against the fullness of his bottom lip, teasing, testing. He groaned—a deep, guttural sound that sent heat pooling low in my belly—and parted his lips for me.
The first stroke of his tongue against mine was devastating, deliberate, and utterly alien. Silken and warm, but textured—each ridge on the top of it dragged against my own, sending sharp, electric pulses straight down my spine. It was longer than I expected, sinuous and impossibly agile, exploring me with a slow, unrelenting hunger. I gasped into his mouth as he curled it against the roof of mine, the friction sending a deep, aching thrill through my body.
He tasted of salt, like the sea breeze just before a storm, rich and heady with something darker beneath—the faint scent of musk, the wild pull of him. My fingers reached up around his neck, one hand cradling his jaw. Desperate to keep myself tethered as I drowned in the sensation of him, the way he felt—all sharp edges and smooth restraint, barely contained.
Arthur kissed like he knew what his touch did to me, like he had been waiting to unravel me, to steal the breath from my lungs and make it his own. 
And I let him. I let him take me.
The soft bristle of his beard scraped against my skin, leaving a tingling warmth in its wake, but I couldn’t bring myself to care. His fingers skimmed my waist, pressing just enough to anchor me, as if afraid I might slip away. 
All I could taste was him. All I could breathe was him. Arthur, steady and unshakable, yet trembling with want. The only thing that mattered in this moment was us.
I didn’t need to open my eyes to see the glow of his bioluminescence. Its colorful shimmer lit up the space between us, painting the darkness behind my eyelids in swirls of deep indigo, flickering like a living halo. 
The heat of his body pressed against mine, damp and feverish, as he surged forward, rising from the water.
The platform was firm beneath me as he eased me down, his weight settling just enough to trap me beneath him. Then, suddenly, I felt it—before I even heard it. A low, resonant purr, vibrating deep in his chest and pouring into mine, rattling through my ribs like the hum of something ancient, something meant to lure and ensnare.
And like the vibration of his purr I could feel the need exuding off him in waves.
His lips crashed against mine, no longer gentle but desperate, fevered. His tongue, ribbed and serpentine, curled around mine, stroking, caressing, dragging across every sensitive nerve like he wanted to learn me by touch alone. The sensation sent a sharp pulse of need straight to my core. I moaned into his mouth, but he swallowed the sound, pressing closer, devouring me with each frantic kiss.
His bioluminescence pulsed in time with his heartbeat, casting a rhythm of shifting blues and purples against my skin. His fingers, slick with seawater, traced up my sides, leaving a cool trail that burned in contrast to the heat pooling between us. I wrapped my legs around him as strong hands curled against my waist, squeezing the tender soft flesh. 
Powerful hips rutted against mine, the hard press of something unmistakable beneath his scales sent a shudder through me. Mixed with the slick proof of his arousal, the sensation was maddening. And I had no doubt he could smell my own—if not taste it.
The kiss turned messy, wet, tongues tangling in a frantic battle for dominance neither of us cared to win. My nails scraped against his shoulders, feeling the shifting muscles beneath his damp skin, and his purr deepened—a growl mixed with something more animalistic. He nipped at my bottom lip, tugging just enough to make me whimper, then soothed the sting with another slow, dragging stroke of his tongue.
I was drowning in him, in the salt, the heat, the way he tasted like the storm rolling in over the horizon. His hunger was intoxicating, and I met it with my own, chasing every kiss, every desperate movement. 
Breath became an afterthought and the only thing that mattered to me was more.
We lay together like this for what felt like eternity, our breaths mingling in the humid air, bodies still pressed close, reluctant to part. My fingers traced lazy circles over the damp skin of his back, memorizing the ridges and dips of muscle beneath the glow that pulsed gently through his veins. Every flicker of light felt like a whisper, a secret between us.
And then he pulled away. I whimpered softly at the loss, my body instinctively arching toward him, unwilling to break the connection. A shimmering string of saliva still tethered us before he reached up, swiping his thumb over my swollen lips, his touch almost possessive.
His sapphire eyes—drowning in pools of endless black—studied me like I was something holy, something to be worshiped. His pupils had expanded so wide they reflected the moonlight itself, making him look less like a man and more like something wild that had crawled out of the deep to claim me.
He leaned in, breath warm against my ear, voice a low, husky murmur. "Did I do good?"
The words alone were enough to make me tremble, but then he nipped at the shell of my ear, his sharp teeth scraping before soothing the sting with the soft press of his lips.
I could hardly form a thought, let alone a coherent answer. His mouth was relentless, lips dragging over my throat, finding sensitive spots with an infuriating precision, nipping and sucking until I was gasping, grasping at his shoulders like they were the only thing keeping me tethered to reality. My wetsuit suddenly felt suffocating, unbearable. If he didn’t stop, I would shed it and take him right here, consequences be damned. It hardly mattered if our bodies could even fit—all that mattered was the heat, the need, the way he was unraveling me with every touch.
"Good—" I managed, the word rasping from deep in my throat, thick with want. "Doesn’t even begin to describe it. There are no words, Arthur. That was—"
He whispered something against my skin. A soft murmur, thick with devotion.
It made me pause. Whatever he said wasn’t English, and it certainly wasn’t human. The sound was rough, like the shifting of stones against the ocean floor, but it carried a melodic cadence, a fluidity that sent a shiver rolling through me.
I pushed myself up onto my elbows, my pulse hammering as I searched his face. "What do those words mean?"
Arthur slowly eased himself off me, sliding back into the water with a grace that reminded me he was not just a man. He belonged to the sea, to something vast and untamed, yet here he was, staring at me like I was the only thing anchoring him to this moment.
I followed him to the edge, pausing as my fingers hovered above the water.
He said the words again, softer this time.
"It has a few meanings," Arthur admitted, his gaze sweeping over my face, studying me with the quiet intensity of a painter capturing his muse. His throat tightened around the words, as if it hurt to speak. "My Ma used to say it to me when I was a kid, before I was taken."
I swallowed thickly as he held my gaze, and then he spoke the translation, each word sinking into my chest like a vow, like a promise meant only for me.
"My hearts will follow you to the end. Into every horizon."
Giving me little time to react, Arthur wrapped his strong arms around my waist and pulled me back into the dark waters. The shock of it stole my breath, the sudden cool embrace of the salt water wrapping around me like silk. The only light was his pulsing glow, shifting hues of deep indigo and soft cerulean, casting shimmering patterns against my skin. Above us, the stars blinked in quiet witness, scattered across the sky like tiny echoes of his bioluminescence that flickered beneath the waves.
I looked down, my breath hitching. The water was so dark now I could barely see the tips of my toes. An endless unknown stretched beneath me, and for the first time, I felt the tendrils of fear creeping in. My pulse pounded against my ribs, instinct screaming at me to retreat, to find solid ground.
But then I remembered his words. What they meant. What they implied. There was no turning back. I was being carried on the wind, letting the current take me where I needed to go. All I had to do was trust him.
Tentatively, I wrapped my arms around his neck, feeling the way his body moved against mine—fluid, effortless. It was like he could sense my hesitation, my uncertainty, because before I could voice it, he pulled me closer.
"Arthur…"
His warmth was a stark contrast to the cool water, his broad chest expanding with each measured breath. I could feel the steady exhale from his gills as they brushed against my thighs, sending a strange, almost soothing sensation through me. He held me tight, one strong arm wrapped securely around my waist, keeping me anchored to him, to this moment.
"There’s something I want to show you," he murmured, his voice low and steady, the promise of something unknown lingering in his tone.
"But… I—I can’t—" My throat tightened, the weight of the ocean pressing around us, reminding me of my limits. I wasn’t like him. I couldn’t breathe down there.
Arthur didn’t even let me finish the thought.
"Hush, darlin’," he soothed, his lips grazing the shell of my ear before pressing against my temple. His voice was a whispered vow, a quiet command laced with reassurance. "Let me be your breath."
Before I could protest, he sealed his lips over mine, the kiss deep and consuming, and I felt it—his breath flowing into me, warm and intoxicating. A strange sensation, like the ocean itself had bent to his will, filling my lungs with something alive.
And just like that, the fear ebbed away.
* ‧̍̊˙· 𓆝.° 。˚𓆛˚。 °.𓆞 ·˙‧̍̊ *
It took a few tries to get used to Arthur breathing into my lungs. At first, it felt unnatural, like my body was rejecting the very thing keeping me alive. My nervous heart devoured each breath like a greedy little sea snake, twisting around my chest, tightening, constricting. But Arthur was patient. He never seemed to mind.
I tried to hold it longer, to prove I could endure, but it was as if he could sense my discomfort before I even knew it myself. He never let it reach the point where panic crept in, never let my lungs burn from the inside out. The moment he sensed my struggle, his strong fingers would find my chin, tilting my face toward his. And then, with a quiet kind of reverence, he would seal his lips over mine and breathe life into me.
And, like before, he was never the first to pull away. Arthur let me take as much air as I needed, as many breaths as it took to steady the wild thunder of my pulse. There was no impatience, no frustration—only trust. A trust unlike anything I had ever known.
I was completely and utterly at his mercy.
The water was darker than I had ever seen it. A thick, endless abyss stretching in every direction, swallowing everything beyond the faint glow of the facility’s underwater lights. They cast eerie, shifting beams, just enough for monitoring water levels, but not enough to truly see what lurked in the depths.
And there was so much lurking.
Every creature we passed seemed to materialize from the void, slipping through the water like ghosts from a world I was only beginning to understand. I knew these animals, had studied them, cared for them. But here, under the shroud of darkness, they felt different. Unfamiliar. As if I were a trespasser in their domain.
A particularly curious stingray drifted above us, its broad body gliding effortlessly through the water. I looked up—and nearly choked on my own scream.
The pale, ghoulish underside of its body loomed above me, its strange, human-like mouth and vacant eyes staring down with an uncanny, haunting expression. My body acted before my mind could catch up—I jerked violently, nearly kicking Arthur square in the chest, my limbs flailing in pure, unfiltered panic.
Once again, he calmed me with his breath. His warmth spread through me, steadying the frantic rhythm of my heart, and I felt it—the quiet shake of his chest, the vibration of something light, and effortless. Laughter. It bubbled up his throat, muted by the water, but I felt it, a tingling hum against my lips before we pulled away.
His fingers found my wrist, strong yet careful, guiding my hand upward. With a slow, deliberate touch, he traced his thumb along my palm, unfurling my fingers one by one.
The stingray hovered just above us, its massive wings rippling like silk through the water. And then, with a slow, ghostly glide, it brushed its velvety skin over the tips of my fingers. Like a whisper, like a greeting.
I had touched stingrays before, plenty of times in the shallow touch-tank, where children giggled and splashed, reaching out to feel the slippery softness of their skin. But never like this. Never in their world, where the touch was theirs to give. It wasn’t me reaching out—it was them, exploring me.
He lifted his hand in front of me, and what he did next sent warmth blooming deep in my belly. With deliberate care, he hooked our index fingers together—a silent sign, one I recognized instantly. Friend.
My chest tightened at the realization. Not only had Arthur remembered that fleeting moment we shared when he was bleeding out on the beach, but he had learned the gesture. He had taken it as his own, stored it away like something precious, something worth keeping.
A lump formed in my throat, but I swallowed it down, curling my finger a little tighter around his.
I made a quiet promise to teach him more later.
Arthur pulled me forward, guiding me through a submerged tunnel. The familiar structure clicked in my mind, recognition settling in my bones. We were entering the back section of the tank—the place away from prying eyes, from tourists pressing their faces against glass. This was his sanctuary. Where he spent his time when he wasn’t with me or the girls.
Curiosity sparked in my chest. What does he want to show me down here?
We swam deeper, the water thick with shadow, but I trusted his grip, the steady pull of his hands as he led me forward. And then, nestled within the rock and kelp, I saw it.
A small cave. A hidden space tucked away in the depths of the tank. I wasn’t sure how I knew—but I did. This was where he slept.
Something about it felt lived in, personal. The flattened kelp was arranged in a circular shape, almost like a nest. It wasn’t just a hiding place. It was his. I could picture him here, curled up in the quiet dark, unguarded, safe. For the first time since I had met him, I wondered what it felt like for him to rest. Unguarded, unshackled, away from cold prying eyes. To just be. 
Arthur pulled me inside, his arm wrapping instinctively around my waist as his bioluminescence flared to life. Light bloomed from his skin, illuminating the space in shifting blues and purples, and what I saw nearly stole the breath from my lungs.
The rock-like walls were etched with various drawings, their rough surfaces covered in markings that varied in detail and size. Some depicted the sea life he shared the tank with—familiar outlines of stingrays, sharks, seals and fish. Others were delicate sketches of underwater plants, their flowing tendrils stretching across the stone like living things.
Curiosity tugged at me, pulling me away from Arthur’s side. I swam closer, reaching out to trace my fingers over the carvings. The grooves were deep, uneven, reminding me of ancient cave drawings. He must have used his claws, carefully etching each image into the stone, leaving behind proof of his existence in this lonely place.
Behind me, Arthur was searching for something, his large hands sifting through layers of kelp. He reached beneath the safety of his makeshift bed, pulling out something dark and solid. But my attention was still on the walls, my heart hammering as I took in every detail of his underwater art.
Then, Arthur waved a hand, pulling me from my trance. I turned to him just as he pointed toward the farthest side of the cave.
And I released my breath.
There, among the sketches of fish and plants—was me.
It was a simple drawing, lacking the fine details of his other works, but it didn’t matter. With the rough material he had to work with, it was still a masterpiece. My heart ached at the sight of it, at the thought of him carving me into the walls of his world.
But it was what he did next that truly unraveled me.
Arthur lifted a webbed palm to his lips, pressing a slow, deliberate kiss to his skin. Then, with a small smile, he released a stream of bubbles toward the drawing—just like I had taught him. An expression of affection, a gesture so sweet it made my chest tighten.
I could have kissed him right then and there. Well, I tried to.
But this gentle giant, ever concerned for my well-being, misunderstood my intent. The moment our lips met, he must have thought I was seeking air. He held me there for a breath longer, and though I wished I could stay pressed against him forever, he was already wrapping a strong arm around my waist, propelling us forward with effortless strength.
I barely had time to process what had just happened before we were darting out of the cave, leaving the warmth of his sanctuary behind.
Arthur still held something tightly in his other palm, and as he guided me through the darkened waters, I realized we were heading somewhere new.
The temperature dropped, the light fading into near blackness.
The deep sea exhibit.
Once we reached a spot he found satisfactory, we floated in utter stillness. The silence of the deep pressed around us, thick and all-encompassing, making me acutely aware of my own heartbeat thrumming in my ears. The nerves crept up my spine again, cold and slithering.
It was pitch black.
I couldn’t see my own hands in front of me, couldn’t even make out Arthur’s features except for the faintest shimmer of his dimmed bioluminescence. He was holding back, keeping his glow subdued, and I had no idea why.
Why did he bring me here?
Then, all at once, his light flared to life.
The sudden brilliance stunned me, a galaxy of blues and purples bursting from his skin like a supernova in the dark. But it wasn’t just him, his radiance set off a chain reaction.
And the void around us moved.
At first, I thought it was my eyes playing tricks on me, but then I saw them—hundreds of creatures emerging from the abyss, answering his call.
Arthur was a beacon, and the deep-sea life responded to him like moths to a flame. Lanternfish flickered in and out of sight, their tiny lights winking like stars in the midnight ocean. Jellies pulsed with ghostly luminescence, their delicate tendrils undulating as they drifted past. Squid, cuttlefish, sea angels—so many creatures I couldn’t begin to name—came to life before my eyes, weaving in and out of the glow like spirits caught between worlds.
They surrounded us in a slow, mesmerizing dance, silent sentinels bearing witness to whatever was about to unfold.
And at the center of it all was him.
Arthur’s radiance was breathtaking, his skin an ever-shifting nebula of color and light. But it wasn’t just his appearance that captivated me—it was the way the ocean responded to him, how it bent to his presence, how even the wildest, most elusive creatures drifted close as if he were something sacred.
He was neither fully man nor entirely mythical. He was something else entirely.
Something that felt indescribable. And in that moment, in the hush of the deep, I understood this pull toward him for what it truly was.
Love.
The solid object he had brought with him turned out to be a large oyster shell, its rough surface barely catching the faint, shifting glow of his bioluminescence. Holding it steady in one hand, he traced a pointed claw along its lip, prying it open with slow, practiced ease.
I watched him with quiet reverence as his fingers slipped inside, moving carefully, deliberately, as if retrieving something precious. When he finally pulled his hand free, his fingers curled tightly around whatever lay within—his fist closing around it with such purpose that my breath crawled up my throat.
A pearl. It had to be.
The empty shell drifted downward, spiraling slowly to the bottom of the tank, forgotten. Arthur didn’t watch it sink. His full attention was on me.
His hands found mine, and the moment our fingers met, my pulse thundered. Heat raced through my veins, my entire body suddenly hyper aware of the weight of the moment, of the way the water seemed charged around us. Before I could even find the words to ask what he was doing, his hand rose, his palm pressing gently against the curve of my neck.
Then, he breathed into me. Warmth spread through my lungs, steadying me, grounding me, but this time, it felt different. Because when he pulled away, his lips still so close I could feel the lingering press of his breath—his mouth moved.
Arthur was speaking. The realization sent a shiver rolling through me. And then I heard it.
His voice.
It was nothing like the deep, gravelly tone I knew from above water. Here, in his element, it was something else entirely.
A melody.
A song, resonant and fluid, shifting in pitch like the ebb and flow of the tide. It wasn’t just words—it was music, a chorus of sound that wrapped around me, kissed the deepest parts of me. It filled my chest, soaked into my bones, made my skin hum with the rhythm of it.
It was haunting. And heavenly.
Tears pricked at my eyes. I didn’t even understand the words, but I felt them. Like a current pulling me deeper, like a promise whispered between waves. And in that moment, I knew—he wasn’t just speaking.
He was singing to me.
Arthur opened his palm, revealing the pearl nestled against the warm glow of his skin. Its milky-white surface shimmered beneath the shifting blues and purples, catching the light like a tiny piece of the moon itself.
A gift. For me.
My heart thundered, a deep, resounding pulse that seemed to echo through every fiber of my being. My mind raced, recalling everything I had learned about his kind—about the significance of this. Gift-giving was a siren’s way of accepting courtship, of expressing mutual desire, a bond far deeper than mere affection.
Did sirens mate for life? Could they have more than one? Am I his first?
Why, of all creatures, did Arthur choose me?
The questions crashed over me like waves against the shore, relentless and unyielding. But then I looked at him. And every uncertainty melted away.
His gaze, luminous and breathtaking, held nothing but certainty. The sweetest smile tugged at his lips, his blue eyes alive with glowing radiance. There was no hesitation, no doubt in his expression. Only him—only us.
His lips moved again, shaping the words I now recognized, a melody that sent warmth cascading through me.
My hearts will follow you to the end.
Emotion swelled in my chest, thick and all-consuming. I reached for him, wrapping my fingers around his, closing the pearl between our palms—sheltering it, protecting it. Safe from the darkness of the tank, from the weight of the unknown, from all the uncertainties that once held me back. It was ours now, cradled between our touch, a silent vow sealed in the space where our hands met.
Arthur had brought light into my life, breath into my lungs, and adventure into my soul.
And as I pressed my lips to his, I knew—I would follow him too.
Into every horizon.
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AN: Listen, lets just ignore the fact that aquarium tanks are absolutely NOT built like this. And we’re also gonna pretend that the reader can see underwater bc I forgot to add the goggles. OH WELL. We're getting creative. With the way everything is going, I'm hoping that the reader gets to fuck her fish man (husband) by chapter 9. YOU GO GIRL!
Also enjoy these inspo pics from that last scene. Utterly gorgeous creatures!! (CR to frida.yolotzin on instagram!)
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alaia777 · 2 days ago
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CONGRATULATIONS FOR 200 FOLLOWERS!!! <333 IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU AND THANK YOU FOR THIS EVENT 🙏😈
id appreciate if you could do one with Rin and the prompt being:
⊹ i love your attention, but i love peace and quiet more—so hush.
Please make it fluff🙏🙏😭 (you can ignore this if you want but I'd appreciate it if you could add a little scene where Rin kisses the reader to shut them up 🤭)
thank you so so much. this was so fun to write, i hope you like it !!!! 🩷🩷🩷
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it was the first time in months that you woke up before rin, and for some reason, today felt different. maybe it was the rare burst of energy that had you up at 6 a.m., already done with your routine, stretching like one of those influencers who post their “productive morning” videos. maybe it was the quiet stillness of the morning, the kind that made you want to savor it.
by the time the city started to wake, you’d already been out—grabbing coffee and pastries from the shop that opened early, spending some time at the park near your apartment, even feeding the pigeons like an old soul with too much free time. and yet, when you stepped back inside, your boyfriend was still exactly where you left him—fast asleep, completely undisturbed.
not that you blamed him. waking up too early, coming home too late—rin had been running on empty for weeks. you figured it had finally caught up to him.
so by 7:30, with nothing else to do, you settled onto the couch, coffee in hand, scrolling through your phone, catching up on the latest influencer drama like it was the morning news.
when you heard the duvet rustling in your shared bedroom, you were already on your feet, making your way over before rin could even sit up. he was still rubbing the sleep from his eyes when you jumped onto the bed, grinning.
“good morning, baby cakes.” even with his hand over his face, you could tell he was rolling his eyes.
“why are you up so early?” he muttered, his voice still rough from sleep.
“because the early bird catches the worm, and i caught us some warm, delicious pastries.” you paused, then sighed. “well, they were warm.”
“but that doesn’t matter. you know that drama about that woman on the internet i told you about? yeah, there’s more.”
without waiting for a response, you launched into the latest updates, detailing every twist and turn—what she did, the backlash, the people involved, and why the internet was in chaos over it. rin, still half-asleep, stared at you with a blank expression, his eyes barely open as he listened in silence.
“but wait—there’s more,” you added dramatically, climbing into his lap and cupping his face between your hands, determined to make sure he was paying attention.
he let out a slow exhale, clearly questioning all of his life choices. “i love your attention, but i love peace and quiet more—so hush.” his hand came up, covering your face as if that would be enough to stop you.
you audibly gasped, prying his hand away. “first of all, rude. second of all—” you sat up straighter, regaining your composure. “as i was saying, she was bragging about her designer bags while her kids don’t even have beds—”
you didn’t even get to finish, because rin’s hands were on your cheeks, pulling you in, cutting you off with a kiss—not to be sweet, not to be romantic, but purely to get you to stop talking.
your brain stalled for a second, words failing you as you processed what just happened, and when you finally snapped out of it, you caught the slightest smirk tugging at his lips. that little shit.
“rin, you need to brush your teeth.”
his smirk instantly dropped as he rolled his eyes, shoving you off him with zero hesitation before dragging himself out of bed and heading for the bathroom. you barely had time to laugh before the sound of the door closing echoed through the room, leaving you alone, victorious.
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the-fyre-flie · 22 hours ago
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A Dad!Batman and Shazam au oneshot for this one commenter in particular and also me because I love this concept, hehe! Also I physically cannot keed writing this on tumblr so like if this does well I'll move it to AO3 and write some more Batfam&Shazam...
@spiritdancer9000
This is INCREDIBLY long btw...
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Bruce didn't know when it started. He couldn't pinpoint the exact moment in time he started treating Shazam differently than the other heros, but at one point or another, he began treating the young man like... one of his own kids. Billy was just a kid himself, but it wasn't like he was inexperienced or powerless. The boy didn't need Bruce's parenting. Yet, the big bad Batman had a soft spot for him.
Bruce adjusted his cowl slightly as he stood from the rubble, grunting in pain as he pushed a large chunk of fallen building out of the way. This fight against a hypnotized Superman was going very poorly. His kryptonite had been sent into the bay, and he was still waiting on one of his various robins or ex robins to answer his distress call and show up with backup. Until that happened, he had to call in Shazam to help contain the alien. Their similar powers meant that while the rest of the Justice League was busy with off planet matters, Billy was the best option to take down Clark. Or at least keep him from causing more destruction. With how many times Clark gets hypnotized or brainwashed, this situation wasn't new or important enough to call back anyone from their missions. They just had to make do and figure out how to break the hypnosis.
"Shazam, can you redirect Superman to the west side of the city? Nightwing will be coming from that direction." For a man heavily bruised, stressed, and in the middle of grappling up to get as close as he could to the dueling supers, Bruce's voice was surprisingly gentle when he spoke to Billy. He almost never raised his voice at the magic infused boy, even in the middle of fights. Tho, once again, Bruce felt like he had to parent Billy. The kid was taking a beating, and he needed a level-headed adult to trust and rely on. Bruce had to be that figure, lest Billy panic, and begin letting Clark cause more damage than necessary.
"I can! I just gotta-!" Billy let out an 'oof' as he was interrupted by Superman landing a sharp hit on his jaw, sending him flying back. The sound was brutal, a loud crack followed by an even louder thud as concrete crumbled around Shazam, the hero leaving a Shazam-shaped crater in the exterior of a building. He groaned as he regained his bearings, floating to Batmans side as Superman prepared a second attack. "Okay, maybe I need a little help..."
Bruce would have chastised the boy for getting distracted for letting Superman get in a blow. That answering was less important than just doing in a moment like that. Instead, he just... let it go. Which is so very unlike him. With any other hero, including his own brood of bats and birds, he would have chewed them out for not reacting properly. With Billy, he didn't even blink, instead focusing on what to do next.
"Grab his cape and get him as close to the outskirts of the west side as possible. I'll keep him distracted."
Shazam flew into action, not one to question Batmans plans. Grabbing onto the cap, Superman immediately shifted to try and grab at the young hero. Only for Batman to begin... threatening Superman? Billy wasn't exactly sure why Batman decided that was the best way to keep the Kyrptonian distracted, but it was working somehow. The more Batman spoke about Lois and Jonathan and all the horrible ways he could take out Clark's family, the more scared rather than aggressive Clark became. For a man of steel, Superman bent easily. Within half a minute, they were touching down in the city limits, Superman not even fighting back anymore, seemingly spiraling, head in hands.
"Why did you say all that stuff to him, mister Batman?" Shazam asked, letting go of the man's cape and joining Bruce's side. As they spoke, Nightwing pulled up, his bike screeching as he came to a sudden stop. He was waving a small thermos looking thing back and forth before tossing it to Batman, disappearing again before he could even be questioned.
"Superman, at his core, is a gentle giant and family man. Threatening or insulting his family makes him depressed. As any father would become if someone like me threatened his son the way I did. I'll apologize to him when he's back in his right mind." Bruce stated gruffly as he unsealed the thermos and waved it under Clark's nose like smelling salts. Usually, he would have been far less gentle with Clark. The alien man could take it. But he couldn't bring himself to he overly violent in front of Shazam.
As the kryptonite was held in front of Clark, he finally snapped out of hypnosis, groggily looking up at Bruce. He squinted a bit, groaned, and stood. Of course, he apologized and offered to help with whatever damage he caused, but Bruce simply dismissed him, telling him to go rest and recover properly.
Sat in a local diner, Bruce watched as Billy stuffed his face with food. They both changed out of their hero persona's, and Billy had been ready to go do whatever orphaned kids do in this day and age, but Bruce had insisted on treating him to food. Bruce watched as the boy rambled and ate, talking about some show he had seen recently. Every time Billy opened his mouth, Bruce was reminded of just how young he was. Just how innocent and alone in the world he was. Bruce nodded and sipped his coffee, Billy almost flinging his waffles as he spoke, the enthusiasm almost contagious. Almost.
"Do you need a place to stay?
Bruce had blurted it out before he even had time to think about the implications. He, Bruce Wayne, THE Batman, had blurted something out. In front of him, Billy was staring, wide-eyed, fork of waffles held up mid bite. It was a long moment of silence before Billy spoke.
"...yes?"
The Wayne manor was quiet. A vast empty building, the echos of their footsteps loud as they made their way through the halls. Billy had to jog to keep up with Bruce's long strides, his sneakers squeaking against the perfectly polished wood floors. As Bruce turned a corner, Billy skidded after him, nearly bumping into a large, scarred man.
"B, why is there a new kid? I thought we all agreed you reached your adoption limit." His voice was almost as gruffs as Bruce's, the scars along his jaw and brow shifting when he spoke. Bruce sighed and placed a hand on Billy's shoulder.
"Jason, this is Billy. He's a... coworker. Billy needs a place to stay. I'm not adopting him." Bruce replied, the man named Jason crouching to match Billy's eye height. He offered a hand, Billy carefully accepting it. They shook before Jason stood, smiling as he walked off.
"You'll probably eat your words by the end of the day. Welcome to the family, Billy."
"What does he mean?" Billy questioned as he continued following after Bruce, brow furrowed as he struggled to match Bruce's pace. Gosh... how did a man so big move so fast?
"Jaylad is just joking around. Don't worry about it." Bruce shook his head as he led Billy down a hall, the sounds of a few boys yelling and video game sound effects getting louder. When they came to a door, Bruce pushed it open, revealing a large game room/theater. A huge TV, a pool table, shelves full of books and board games, and a trio of boys sat on the couch in front of the screen, two of them holding controllers while the third did his best to get in the way.
"Move, Grayson! I need to win and show Thomas that he can never defeat me!" The smallest boy shouted, trying to push the young man out of the way.
"Keep distracting him, Dick! I'm almost there!" The other boy grinned madly as he leaned around Dicks side to get a better view of the screen, his character seemingly ahead of the others in whatever racing game they were playing. After a few more moments of shouting, the race ended, and the boys became a loud tangle of limbs and arguments. Accusations of cheating were thrown around, followed by claims of it being fair game, only to suddenly stop when they noticed Bruce and Billy.
"This is Damian, Dick, and Duke. my youngest, oldest, and most recent." Bruce spoke, and Billy offered a small wave. Why did Bruce have so many kids? HOW did Bruce have so many kids? Why is Damian the only one who looks like him? Is this what Jason meant by Bruce adopting him?
"Another one? Duke hasn't even had time to bask in his newness. He's still got New Adoptee Smell." Dick laughed a bit as he returned Billy's wave, Duke rolling his eyes from beside him.
"Billy isn't being adopted. He just needs a place to stay, and the manor has rooms." Bruce once again corrected. But as Bruce talked with Dick and Duke, Billy couldn't help by shiver at the feeling of someone glaring at him. Damian hasn't taken his eyes off Billy, his stare cold and hard and very judgmental. Yup... that one was %100 Bruce's kids.
"Billy? Let's go." Bruce's voice pulled the boys from the staring contest, Billy quickly following after the man as he left to show him more rooms. When they came to a new door, Bruce gestured for Billy to enter. Inside was a large room, a bed, a wardrobe, a desk, pretty much what you'd expect from a rich family with extra rooms.
"You can stay here as long as you'd like. We have plenty of space, food, etc. With your powers, you can be from here to Faucet in under 2 minutes, so any travel should be fine." Bruce was trying very hard to see like he didn't care too much, that this was all kindness done for a coworker, and not because he desperately felt responsible for the child stood in front of him. Billy was so young, about the same age as Damian, and the kid had nothing. Of course, Bruce had to step up.
"Thanks, Mr Wayne. I... are you certain?"
"Just Bruce is fine. And yes."
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ynnie631 · 2 days ago
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𝐓𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐃 𝐅𝐎𝐑
𝐌𝐄...
⋆˚✿˖°┆𝐃𝐢𝐥𝐮𝐜 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫... inspired by this playlist because there wasn't any POV's and I got a massive bonk of an idea.
𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬!!! Suggestive content (not too graphic) , Sub-ish! Diluc, whipped! Diluc, implied or slightly yandere-ish/obsessive reader, heavily unedited, bad writing (english is NOT my first language), gender-neutral reader, reader is married to Diluc... (did I miss anything?)
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THE MOON was high, illuminating your worn out frame, subjected to a week of your lover's absence. Diluc Ragnvindr, a man of honor and composure: Steady, composed, and the utmost reliable in all scenarios, be it your needs, the guild's quests, or mora for a fundraiser to orphaned children.
A man that was previously Monstadt's bachelor, one that was sought after by every lady in Monstadt, including distant nations... ranging from wealthy aristocrats to commoners alike. From his looks alone— a sharp jawline, slanted-lidded eyes that strike even the fiercest of foes, red hair so bold and vivid that Snezhnaya itself would tremble at the mere sight, his mere presence, from the sheer absurdity his tale had weaved— his deep, alluring but gruff voice. Unintentionally sultry, leaving you weak with a mere word, a phrase if you try hard enough.
But nothing ever compares to his sculpted greek-esque bod.
Scars would trail beneath his chemise—leaving one to imagine how much he's endured. You'd wonder if your nails would leave a lasting mark, engraving him next to the victories he won over was something carnal, a desire you wished to fulfill— muscles bulging out, as if to threaten and rip the fabric in half. But most of all, the hair that traveled inches above his slacks, and by god, his waist— God forbid he sways those hips of his... You'd rather swallow pride and dignity if it meant that you could sling your hand possessively, curling and kneading his tarnished flesh— His curved and slender, yet brawny stature unraveled a knot of lust that surpassed even the most depraved urges of men.
You are no better than man, that you know of... You scoff at the thought, why would you ever be better with a man like Diluc Ragnvindr?
A man that was previously Monstadt's bachelor, his ring finger that once was barren, now lay with a silver white ring inscribed with the insignia of his clan's symbol, a red garnet in the center. One that matched your own, along with a few twists that accommodate your desired result; 
A man that was previously Monstadt's bachelor, one sought after, is yours. Betrothed and wed to you.
"His spouse, his partner, now and forevermore." His vow entirely. And you plan to keep it that way; A loyal testament to the passion you harbor for him: Convoluted and never-ending, twisted in the sense of mania, obsession, and delusion.
He had the power to break you, tear you into pieces if he so pleases... and you'd willingly come back. He'd make you beg, on your knees if he wills it, and you'd swiftly agree.  It honestly scares you, how much you'd do for him, your husband; your partner forevermore.
You sigh, staring wistfully at the vast array of grapes in the courtyard. Longing for your lover's embrace, his warm presence, his touch... It was overwhelming. Achingly so. A week without him felt like a decade.
You miss him, want him, need him back in the estate. It can never be the same without hi— creak!
A door shuts near the hallway, you pay no mind to it. 
Adelinde usually comes back late at night, bringing home a duffel bag which she places inside the basement. You ponder over the sweet yet revolting smell, but no one nor the owner himself was allowed to enter said basement. Adelinde made sure of it… for whatever reason.
Footsteps echo farther from your room.
You curl beneath the sheets, exhaustion weighing heavy, grasping and clutching the warm blanket that smelled like him: Eucalyptus with grape, a hint of clary sage and olibanum, verbena lingering from it all. By archons… you’ve missed him. So, so much.
Creak!  Light peaks through the dimly–lit room. A rustle here, a rustle there…  you yawn internally, Adelinde was at her cleaning yet again…
The bed dips, "My love, my dear."  a voice calls, it's warm and pleasant, gruff and deep;  Your pleas were answered, internally thanking the gods who listened.
"Diluc..."  you scramble, engulfing his sturdy frame with a yearning hug. His arms encase you instinctively, casting his warm and loving presence.  You need him—  "I've missed you."  you whisper, voice a soft yet fleeting timbre.
He answers with a needy kiss, pouring the love and longing he harbored after a week without you. A week without your presence, your touch, your voice— a week without you.  It was cruel, achingly so.
His business trip to Liyue had gone smoothly: gaining new contracts with varying suppliers and willing buyers, forging new allies that promised him their own aid to sudden emergencies. Diluc was glad for the successful endeavor, but archons, he missed you.
The silver ring would glint as he rubs and flexes his fingers, reminding him of home— his duty as your husband, your partner forevermore— worry and concern etched across his features as the meeting drones on and on. He’d wonder,  are you safe?  Do you miss him like he does?  Do you wait for him in bed, suppressing the need and desire to venture in Liyue?  Do you lie awake at night, worrying yet adoring him in all his glory? 
Thoughts like this consumed him. Keeping him in a daze of endless worry and yearning to flee back, back to you.
Diluc loved you so much: in every waking hour, he’d rise and imagine your morning voice. The slight rasp and slur as you greet him a sweet  good morning,  wrapping your arms around him in a lazy hug. Cuddling, and warming his ever heating cheeks.  In every passing second, he’d shower and imagine your tender kiss. Your soft lips, as you caress his waist, rubbing and tracing the scars embedded deep within his skin. Whispering sweet nothings to his ear as your fingers trail lower and lower, that once sweet and warm tone, turned seductive, sultry. Enticing both him and you in a sway of flushed cheeks and erotic moans. You’d urge him deeper, faster, entangling both his and your hands, silver rings glinting in the dimly lit room.
And oh, he realizes, as he struggles to replicate the same warmth, the same grip. He whines and grunts, hips stuttering, thrusting in and out of his calloused hand.  It isn’t the same,  he’d complain, lips parting to chant your heavenly name.  It isn’t the same without you.
He’d spend the week— in every passing hour, every passing second— in great turmoil. Thoughts of you tantalizing him in a deeper hole of desperate ruts, pleading for your presence to magically appear beside him, taking care of his raging boner, and whispering sweet nothings to his ear.
Diluc Ragnvindr, a man of supposed composure: steady, composed, and utmost reliable; Diluc Ragnvindr, the most stoic and ever so collected bachelor of Monstadt, completely crumbles and unravels by your mere touch— the mere thought of you and he’s gone— A kiss to the lips, one that was supposedly innocent left him breathless. Wanting, needing, and urging you for more.
“Please… please…”  he’d plead, eyes withholding the desperation, the longing, his yearning: softly grasping your hand with trembling fingers, a lovesick expression etching deep within his features.
You gulp, splaying a hand over his clothed chest. He shudders, gasping at the contact,  “take the lead for me.”  You imagined yourself begging for him, on your knees if he wills it… and yet— pushing you back to the sheets, he wasted no time in taking off his chemise, revealing his greek–esque bod, nipples perked and flushed in pink, a pretty shade of pink, you’d jest.
He grinds his crotch against your thigh, and he whines, heaving ragged breaths,  “please, please— take the lead for me, my love.”
And who are you to deny your own husband?
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⋆˚✿˖°┆ 𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞... I don't know about ya'll... But I think I hate it? But it's whatever. My style is a bit experimental, so I can't really delete progress or hinder whatever the hell my mind conjures. Aside from that, I totally see myself writing more of these, not smut entirely but mostly Diluc-centered because I love him and I'll indulge myself in sweet fantasies about my man
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hisirishsoufflegirl · 12 hours ago
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Tea Is A Love Language ~ A.H x Reader
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A/N (wow I haven’t wrote that in years): Hi! I’m back (says them to people who did not even realise they stopped writing lmao). There’s been an Aaron Hotchner x You slow burn fic brainstorming away whenever I’ve been rewatching Criminal Minds for the past few years so I thought I’d make a comeback to write a sample entry (that takes place a bit into the actual fic) to see what everyone thinks, aha.
CW/Context: Aaron and Hayley are divorcing/there’s no Emily(sorry!)/Aaron being grumpy but then surprisingly sweet/Reid and reader are best friends/Morgan and reader are very close due a traumatic past/Aaron gave a private lil sweet pep talk to reader when they got overwhelmed after the college campus murders/the timeline is a bit jumbled but it’ll be easier to follow/explained in full fic/in canon mentions of violence/I’m rusty at this, forgive me
-
A sigh. Then a smacking sound as the paper contents of a file hit the desk.
“Who’s up for a drink?” Morgan stood up. Eyebrows raising as if a lightbulb flashed atop his head, he turned. “Actually.. who’s up for five?”
The man didn’t need to ask you twice. Nights out drinking with Morgan were always the safest. Sure, they were wild and chaotic.. but you always knew you would get home and you always knew you’d never wake up the next morning fearing you did something you regret. It was funny. One of the men who inspired you to join the Academy and pursue this as a career was not only now a colleague but a friend. A close friend at that. Your letters containing updates on your life since that awful period of your life when you were 18 were more for Gideon’s sake. Though that didn’t mean Derek never checked up on you throughout the years that led to you surprising the agent the day it was announced a new member was joining the team and in you walked into the table meeting.
“I don’t know..” your best friend trailed off, his focus on fixing the contents of his brown satchel.
You got up from your desk, the one attached to Spencer’s, shouldering your own bag. “Nuh-uh, Spence. You’re coming.” You looked up at him, trying your hardest to use your eyes to silently beg to coax him out.
It worked. It always worked. Reid hated nights out, especially Morgan’s definition of a night out, but you knew you made it tolerable for him. Many a night of drinking you sat with the doctor, letting him ramble off about statistics or Star Trek and often debating the one topic you yourself did know about - Doctor Who. You didn’t know why some of the others treated listening to his interests and rambles as almost a chore. You had always found them interesting and besides, how could someone not take an interest in what their best friend cared about?
“.. you’re still cosplaying at comic con with me, right?” Spencer’s eyes narrowed at you.
“Of course.”
“Alright, I’m in.”
You mouthed a “thank you” at him, your hand coming up to touch his elbow as a comfort as you both walked to join Morgan and Rossi heading towards the door.
“JJ?”
“Ugh, I’d love to but.. gonna have to take a rain check.” the blonde woman grimaced, picking up her share of files.
You felt someone brush past you as they hurried towards the glass door of the bullpen. You turned your head, realisation hitting you that it was your Unit Chief. You hadn’t properly spoken one on one to the man ever since the day the team was about to leave Flagstaff, Arizona. There had been a spree killer on a college campus, murdering women who were very similar in age to you and it brought back some painful memories. Painful memories as well as a feeling of guilt that you had survived your own attack and had went on to go and finish college. A privilege that those victims never got to make a reality. You had stepped away for a moment to compose yourself back at the hotel while the other agents were packing to go home when Hotch had appeared beside you. You had been sure you were to be scolded for being too soft or for your exterior slipping, a worry that was all too evident as you had tried to quickly wipe your tear away and swallow the ache in the back of your throat. But no. He had been kind. Really kind. The conversation had not been long, nor did the comforting hand on your arm to gesture you back to the hotel to leave linger, but it had helped.
“Hotch, you up for a beer?” the Italian man extended the invitation to his friend.
Hotch stopped in his tracks, his eyes flickering to the side as he pondered his answer. He decided with a sigh. “Sure.” He turned and you offered an awkward smile when his eyes settled on you.
“Agent Hotchner.” came the suited man with a clipboard and envelope into the room through the glass doors.
Breathing in, Hotch’s eyes looked away from you as he turned. “Yes?”
The man presented him with the clipboard and a pen to sign for the brown envelope.
Hotch’s eyes shifted down to it and his body stiffened slightly with a sharp intake of breath.
You had never seen Hotch display a crack in his exterior like that before. I wonder what’s in that envelope. You thought.
Breaking the silence, you sucked your lower lip in - a tell, you had been told by one of your profiler buddies, that you felt awkward and anxious. “What is it?”
Your boss stared down at the envelope, his fingers subconsciously kneading the paper. That’s one of *his* tells, you surmised, whatever it is it’s bothering him.
He finally glanced up at you through dark eyelashes, a look of defeat in those dark eyes. “Hayley’s filing for divorce. I’ve been served.”
Fuck. Fuck. You fucked up.
You watched as Hotchner took a final look at the contents in his hands before walking away, no longer feeling up to a fun and happy night.
~
“McCoy Boy! How was Connecticut?” You greeted Spencer as you, Morgan, JJ and Rossi piled back into the bullpen. You dropped your bag onto your chair and circled round to the opposite side of the desk to throw your arms loosely round the genius’ neck and shoulders. You never took advantage of the privilege of being the only one Reid allowed to casually touch him like this but now didn’t count. You had missed him. While you were in Indianapolis helping Rossi catch the monster that haunted him and three siblings, your best friend and your Unit Chief were in Connecticut interviewing a death row inmate.
Spencer rested his hand on one of your arms as you squeezed him, propping his book down on his desk. “Ultimately uneventful.”
You shifted your head from the top of Reid’s curly mop to his temple. “Fill me in anyway.”
Spence chuckled before turning his gaze at Rossi. “Uh sir, there’s someone waiting to speak to you in your office.”
You pulled back to crane your neck behind you. Sure enough, Kevin Lynch stood in the doorway to the office at the end of the walkway.
You focused on JJ’s face as Kevin talked, a face barely containing her smile and giddiness. Your eyebrows furrowed confused and as Rossi walked past to talk ‘man-to-man’ with the tech analyst, you mouthed ‘what??’ to the blonde.
JJ raised her eyebrows suggestively at you as she swivelled to walk away. “Garcia and Kevin sittin’ in a tree..”
Morgan’s mouth dropped open. “Get out of here.”
“Wait, what? What?” the brown eyed genius piped up, confusion and anxiety about missing a clue seeping in his voice.
“Didn’t you hear the song, love?” You asked your friend, your left arm still leaning on the back of his office chair for standing support.
“The song meant something? No, I missed it!” Reid grew frantic. Adorable.
“Yeah, it..” you trailed off as your eyes looked around the room as you looked up. They landed on the dark haired man in his pristine suit, shoulders tense as he hunched over his desk, one hand resting on his forehead.
He looks so stressed.
You sucked in your lower lip. “Don’t worry your pretty little head about it.” You ruffled the top layer of Spencer’s brown curls. “I’ll explain it later.”
You moved your duffel bag onto the floor underneath your desk and settled in your chair. Every instinct in you was screaming to check in on your boss. That’s just the type of person you were and your instincts never did you wrong. You had gone on gut instinct when you asked Spencer what was causing him to struggle which eventually led to him going to rehab. You had listened to your instinct when it told you to gather up Morgan and JJ to join Rossi in Indianapolis a few days ago. But this was Hotch. This was your boss. You had never seen the man crack a smile let alone open up about his feelings.
Leaning your chin on your hand, your head twisted to look at the environment behind your desk. Looking behind you had become a habit since you were a teenager, even when your body knew it was in a safe environment such as the bullpen. But old habits die hard and listen, it was a habit that kept you alive in the field. Funny that. You’d think someone with that self preservation habit would run away from situations that posed a threat, not run to them. And certainly not make a career out of solving them.
Your eyes landed on the coffee machine set up and kettle sat on the communal kitchen countertop.
Hmm. Too late for coffee. You hummed. Hold on..
You swung your legs out from under your desk, pushing yourself up and away from your desk and headed towards the communal kitchen. The plethora of jars containing coffee grounds - the jar with the brown and gold label was Reid’s only go to - and sugar - the plastic tub of aspartame was JJ’s - littered the counter. But you weren’t looking for the coffee. Stretching up on your tiptoes, you opened up each cupboard. You searched the top two before bending down to view the contents of the bottom ones.
A-ha! Found you. You took out the green box praying it wasn’t empty and silently thanked God when it wasn’t. Plopping one of the tea bags into the clean ecru mug you found, you filled the kettle in the sink and flicked on the switch.
As the water boiled, you dared to glance to your right at Hotch’s office. You didn’t think it was possible but the man looked even more stressed. The noise of the kettle turning off drew your attention and you poured the hot liquid into the mug, pressing the teabag to the sides of the mug with the spoon before scooping it up and binning it in the pedal bin. Stealing the last of the semi skimmed milk from the fridge, you trickled some of it into the tea before stirring. Dropping the spoon into the sink promising to clean it in a few minutes, you grasped the handle of the cup and headed towards the steps to the walkway.
Your feet reached the closed door to the office and your knuckles rapped against the wood.
“Come in.” He sounds tired.
Careful not to spill the tea, you pushed the handle of the door down and the door opened. Hotch glanced up. Twice. Once out of habit. The other a double take. His head left his hand and he placed his pen down on the case files in front of him. You could tell he was trying to figure out what you were doing in his office, it was obvious in his eyes. For a man so expressionless, his eyes were always so expressive.
You realised you had been staring at him for probably a bit too long and shifted your eyes down to the mug in your right hand, your other hand clasping round it for the excuse of holding something as a distraction. You lightly tapped your ring against the porcelain as you tried to word your sentence in your head before your mouth could get you into trouble. The action had Hotch’s gaze look down at your hands, something you noticed he did often. You had a habit of fiddling with one of your rings when you wanted to say something but were deciding if you should or not. It usually ended in Hotch noticing and asking you your opinion on the topic at hand.
You took a breath in. “Sir, if I had known.. I wouldn’t have asked about the envelope in front of everyone.“
“Y/L/N-“ Hotch sat upright in his chair.
“Anyway, I uh, I’m not going to ask you to talk about it.” You reassured him, cutting him off. Still looking at the mug in your hands, you continued. “I just want you to know that you’re not alone in this. I, the team, will support you in any way we can.”
You could feel your heart speeding in your chest, you were sure your boss could even hear the thumping. You risked looking up. The usually stoic man’s gaze softened, his forehead smoothing out. Maybe Hotch wasn’t so scary all the time.
“My mother always liked to show it with tea,” You remembered the mug in your hands. Probably should explain that, yeah. “And it’s what I know so.. uhm..” You shuffled forward closer to his desk and settled the cup on top of the dark wood. Stepping back, your hands went to the back of your trouser legs.
Hotch stared at you, his expression not giving anything away. “You didn’t have to.”
You cocked your head to the side. “Think of it as repaying the favour.”
You watched as those big dark eyes softened, gaze switching to the mug now sat on his desk. Giving an tight lipped smile, you nodded awkwardly and turned to leave. You didn’t wanna overstay your welcome. As your hand reached for the door, your name being called stopped you in your tracks. Not your last name. Your name.
“Y/N?”
You turned, surprised at the switch from your surname to your first name. Hotch called everyone by their surnames, even Rossi sometimes. “Yeah?”
“Thank you.” He meant that. Sincerely.
You tried to stop the smile etching its way onto your face. You felt bold. “Don’t mention it.. Aaron.”
Hotch - Aaron cracked a small smile. A tiny quirk of his lips. You nodded at each other, your hand closing the door behind you as you left the office.
Taking the steps down to your desk, you didn’t see Hotch bring the mug to his lips, taking a swig. His eyebrows raised in approval. Another swig. Leaning back in his chair, he inhaled, looking to his left to watch the bullpen out of his office window. He spotted you carrying case files back to your desk, engrossed in conversation with Reid.
He sighed, his attention turning back to his desk, pausing before opening the drawer next to him. His fingers hovered over a brown envelope, picking it up and sliding the contents of it out in front of him. Taking a breath and another swig of tea, Hotch picked back up his pen and signed his name on the dotted line.
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alwayzadorbs · 1 day ago
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Just found your account and you're automatically my fav luci writer my god?? YOU'RE FEEDING US Could you do lucifer with a virgin mc who's oblivious to advancements but gets extremely shy if lucifer spells it out for her👉👈
You're in luck, Anon! I hope you don't mind if I refer to MC with gender-neutral pronouns! I'll still describe other stuff but I just feel more comfortable writing that way :D I'm glad you like my writing so much, it means the world to me! I'll try to write more for you! <3
rating: Smut, 18+
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You couldn't deny that you had feelings for Lucifer, you often thought about holding his hand or what it would be like to date him. So you couldn't help but smile when he offered to Tutor you for upcoming testing. It was a rare occasion for Lucifer to be able to tutor you instead of sticking it on Satan again, on account of the workloads Diavolo annually places on him.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ━━━━⊱༒︎ • ༒︎⊰━━━━ ⋆⁺₊⋆
You had brought your schoolwork to Lucifer's room, setting the stack of papers on his glass table, and sitting down on his couch. Lucifer came to sit next to you, pressing his leg against yours.
Clearing his throat, Lucifer said, "Let's begin with Spells and Potions..." Trying not to be distracted by his thigh touching yours, you jotted down the most important things.
"So, What do you think this one is?"Lucifer said, pointing towards the question and leaning over.
"I think that the answer is..." You trailed off, unsure if what you were about to say was right or wrong.
"Hm, Almost correct, Can you tell me what's wrong with this excerpt here?" He said, lightly placing his gloved hand on your knee, using his other hand to point towards the line of text you misinterpreted
"Uh," you paused, trying to sort your thoughts, there's no way Lucifer did that on purpose, it must've been an accident, no reason to get worked up... "Right here where I wrote eye of eye of newt, it's supposed to be, uh.."
Lucifer's hand trailed up from your knee to your thigh "Eye of hellfire newt, a small but distinct difference, it's easy to get confused when making this potion. The effects are, adverse and unwieldy." he chuckled lowly, lightly squeezing your thigh
"Let's continue, next is...Anatomy class," He continued, removing his hand from your thigh to pull his coat off "You need to understand a Demon's anatomy," his hands drifted to his necktie, wiggling it slightly before pulling it undone.
"Our bodies inside and out are actually quite similar, except for a few differences..." Lucifer explained, going into more detail, pulling his gloves off to unbutton his shirt, the first few buttons popping away from their spots, revealing his soft skin, and collar bones. "So tell me, where do you think my heart is? Go ahead, point." He shifted his body towards you on the couch, welcoming you to make the next move.
"W-wait what?" Your face flushed, Why did he just strip?! "I, I'm not sure.." you said, looking away, even though you wanted to stare.
Even when Lucifer went to the beach, with you and all his brothers, he wore a SPF shirt, never showing his muscles in their full glory, but now, you could finally see what he hit underneath his shirt. His ample pecs were decorated by his flush, pink nipples. You could eat up the sight for hours,, but it's wrong to look at somebody like that when they're trying to be professional, or at least that's what you thought was going on.
In all reality, you were completely oblivious to the fact Lucifer was coming on to you. And Lucifer was completely oblivious to the fact you were a virgin.
"Here, I'll show you." He said, smirking, guiding your hand with his towards his chest "If you press firmly enough, you can hear my heartbeat."
your breath stopped for a moment, his heart beat rapidly, and you could feel it radiating in your fingertips. Something about the way your hand pressed against his chest lit a fire in your loins. As soon as you felt it, heat flushed through your face, looking away and pulling your hand back.
"uh- sorry, yeah I felt your heartbeat," you said, awkwardly, feeling embarrassed. You subconsciously let your hand wander to your face, trying to hide a bit in your hand.
"Hm, Whats wrong, Mc?" Lucifer sighed, in a flirtatious tone. He reached out, guiding your head to face him with his index finger under your chin, with his thumb lightly placed on your chin.
He smiled, "Feeling embarrassed? That's hardly the most...sensitive subject for Demons." Now staring you down, with those gorgeous ruby eyes, there's no way you can look away.
He gripped your hand with his, guiding it to his frame once again "Lungs, spleen, liver,,," He continued to guide your hand down, with the corresponding areas of his organs, until, he could guide no longer, reaching his waistband.
"Mc," Lucifer edged closer, leaning in, cupping your face with his hands. "Kiss me."
Blush covered your face, stunned, you squeaked out, "Why?! I..I thought we were studying.." You said, reluctantly.
Lucifer laughed, "Mc, I want to be with you. Must I spell it out further? I want to have sex with you" He blurted out, shutting his eyes, blush creeping onto his cheeks.
"But..." you paused, looking away "I'm..uh, I'm a virgin!"
Before you could look back to see his reaction, Lucifer was on top of you, pressing his knee in between your legs. "Don't worry, I'll be gentle." he chuckled, kissing you softly while tugging at the buttons of your blouse.
Lucifer took his time, savoring the moment when the buttons came undone, revealing your gorgeous skin. He trailed his kisses down, nipping at your neck, down to your chest. He used one hand to gently roll one of your nipples around his pinchers, lightly squeezing and pulling them as he took the other into his mouth. He would circle his tongue around your nipple, ever so lightly grazing his teeth on them and nipping, earning a surprised gasp from you.
He pulled away, gliding his hands down your sides to the waistband of your bottoms, sliding them right off. Drifting his hands down your stomach and dipping his fingers into your underwear, Lucifer used his middle and ring fingers to slowly circle your clt.
pushing one finger into your wetness, curling it before pulling it almost out, then repeating the process until you were ready for another finger. two fingers, then three, then he figured you were ready, not for a fourth finger, but for him.
He pulled his fingers out, sitting up over you. he unbuttoned his pants, tucking his thumbs into his waistband, freeing his touch-starved cock, It twitched, begging to be pleased.
He slid his dick in between your folds, teasing you before putting it in, He pushed against your entrance until he met resistance. you rolled your head to the side, wincing a bit, feeling a tearing sensation.
As resistance snapped, Lucifer groaned, throwing his head back momentarily as he fully entered you. He sighed, "I want to see your reaction, look me in the eyes, Little lamb."
He slowly rocked his hips in and out, raking his hands towards your chest, squeezing your boobs, and rubbing your nipples with his thumb. He trusted deeper into you, causing you to gasp. He chuckled, His hand drifting from your chest to your clit again, using his thumb to rub circles while pounding you into next week.
"Oh, Lucifer!" you moaned without thought, but that only fueled him to vigorously fuck you harder.
He pulled out, flipping you on your stomach like you weighed less than air, he gripped your hips, bringing them into the air before pressing inside you again. "Mm~ you're so tight" Lucifer groaned, leaning into you, reaching deeper than he did before. He thrust in and out, slamming into your G-spot, every time he hit that sweet spot you saw stars.
At this point, you weren't aware of how much and how loud of noises you were making, being fucked numb, heat swelled in your loins, tickling you just the right way. You were so close to finishing, but couldn't quite get there
"Ah, Don't stop, Oh shit, Please don't stop!" You cried out, a panting, blubbering mess.
Lucifer only pushed himself deeper inside you, withdrawing his hand to spank you, slapping your ass then squeezing the area. You yelped when his hand hit your ass, looking back at him with pleading eyes. He smirked at you, proud of how easily he could make you crumble
"I'm so close," he sighed, the room filled with both of your moans and pants of pleasure "Mc, Mc!"
He slammed into you, your legs shaking as you were sent over the edge, feeling waves of pleasure crash into you, before being filled with hot liquid, bringing your orgasm to a peak. you grabbed desperately onto the couch, knuckles nearly turning white as you moaned out Lucifer's name.
After a moment, he pulled out of you, his cum spilling out as well. you both caught your breath for a minute before you sat up,
"Um, thanks for helping me study, Lucifer," you said, blushing, covering your body with your hands.
he laughed "Do you think I'm done with you? Not yet, stay in my room tonight, Mc." He looked at you with those seductive eyes "You're mine, remember?"
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"Whats that on your neck, Mc?!" Mammon asked, on the walk to school
"oh, um, its nothing, you know humans they're super fragile!" you laughed nervously, hoping he wouldn't realize it was a hickey from your 'study' session with Lucifer.
"Humans are so weak, nothing like The Great Mammon!" He boasted, quickly forgetting what just happened
"sure, humans are fragile!" Asmo laughed, knowing the truth behind the 'bruise' on your neck.
(side note: thank you for enjoying my stories enough to send an ask, sometimes I get writers block and its extremely helpful, I hope this wasn't too short. love ya, Reader, and Anon!)
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marvelavengerspovs1 · 14 hours ago
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Chapter 2- Ruinous
Pairing: Bucky x F!reader
Warnings: Lots and lots of angst (sorry but not sorry), toxic behaviors between Bucky and Reader, 18+ MDNI
Length: 1.8k
Summary: You and Bucky are going through a rough patch. Is it something worth fixing?
A/N: Did I write this when I should’ve been studying for an exam? Yes, but I couldn’t help it!
I do not give consent for my work to be translated, copied, or sold!
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Bucky stares at the pieces of the whiskey glass on the floor. Little droplets of the whiskey mixed with the Asgardian liquor stained the wall and the floor. It was unfair, you lashing out at him. You knew his struggles, his demons. And he told you it wasn’t your fault.
But he knew, deep down, that you were being fair. You had to do what was good for you. And right now, that wasn’t him.
Bucky collapses on the couch, his head in his hands. He knows that he acted like an asshole. He knows that you deserve better than that. So why couldn’t he change? Why couldn’t he stop lashing out?
He doesn’t have the answer. He wants to, but it’s like he can’t control what he’s doing. So he gets up, grabs another glass and pours himself a hefty amount of Asgardian liquor and whiskey, and grabs the mostly untouched box of cigarettes from his secret cupboard.
-
You wake up cold. You felt the emptiness beside you and slowly opened your eyes. You’re not home, you realize. The explosive fight with Bucky happened. You leaving your shared apartment happened. You staying the night at Natasha's happened.
You stare up at the ceiling, trying to think. How can your relationship be saved? How could you leave the relationship? The decision is daunting to say the least.
To start off, Bucky and you have been together for years. You know each other inside and out. Well, you used to.
You shake your head and try to think more.
Bucky has a short temper, quick to anger. But it was never with you. When you fought, it typically wasn’t anger that made you scared. He always made sure that you were trying to understand his side.
You shake your head. You couldn’t stop contradicting yourself. If you thought about a good thing about Bucky, a negative would follow. The whole situation is confusing for you.
You decide that laying in bed isn’t helping your decision. You get up and make the bed, trying to be a good guest. You leave the room to find Natasha in the kitchen making breakfast.
She offers you a small smile. “Morning, want some?”
You look at the pan and see eggs. You scrunch your nose.
“No thanks, I can’t even think about eating right now.” You sigh and hop up on one of the counters.
Natasha places her spatula down and leans on the opposite counter to look at you. “I’m guessing you didn’t get much sleep.”
“Well I did sleep, it wasn’t very restful though.” You yawn and shrug.
Natasha nods. “Do you want to talk about it?”
“I just don’t know what more I can say, you know?” You feel your eyes begin to water again. “I knew about his baggage, his nightmares, who he is. And I fell for him hard and fast. And now he’s going backwards and refusing to get help. All of the bad doesn’t negate the good, but his recent actions are things I can’t overlook.”
Natasha hums and pushes a lock of hair behind her ear. “Maybe this is something you need to talk to him about.”
You quickly wipe under your eyes with a sniff. “Is that a good idea?”
Natasha pushes herself off of the counter to stand in front of you. “Are you scared that he’s going to do anything irrational?”
You shake your head. Even though Bucky isn’t acting totally like himself, he’s not an idiot.
Natasha nods. “Then you need to have this conversation with him. Maybe he can tell you his side of things and maybe that’ll change things for you.”
You think about what she said. On one hand, you know that talking to Bucky would maybe clarify some things for you. On the other hand, it may cause another fight. But it was something you were willing to risk.
-
You unlock the front door, the stench of Asgardian liquor and smoke filling your nose. You see Bucky on the couch, a cigarette in his hand.
He takes a drag before turning to you. “Where were you?”
You frown at his hand. Bucky follows your gaze. He knows you hate it when he smokes. Smoking is one of the few things he picked up again when he felt stressed. But he told you that he stopped because of how much you hated it. Now you know he lied.
“Natasha’s.” You mutter.
Bucky scoffs at this and puts out the cigarette. “Of course you were.”
You furrow your eyebrows. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
He stands up. “It means I’m tired of you always running to her when we fight.”
“How is that any different than you going to Steve?”
“Because Steve is Steve. He’s my best friend.”
You let out a humourless laugh. “You’re telling me that just because Steve is your best friend he’s better than Natasha? She’s not some stranger.”
“Well she’s basically one to me, you spend so much time with her.”
“Well maybe I wouldn’t if you weren’t an asshole!” You raise your voice.
Bucky clenches his jaw. “So it’s my fault that you always run to her?”
“Sorry I don’t feel like I can come home!” You yell at him sarcastically.
He furrows his brows. “What, you don’t feel safe?”
“Look at you now! You’re getting angry with me for wanting space and hanging out with Natasha. Why would I come home if this is what I’m coming home to?”
“All because of what happened yesterday? Is that why you don’t want to come home?”
“No, I don’t want to come home because I’m scared of you! I’m scared that you’re moving backwards and this isn’t something that I can help you with. And… I’m scared that this isn’t something that I want to be around.”
“What do you mean you don’t want to be around?” He takes a step towards you.
“Bucky, you’ve been going backwards for months. You’ve been quick to anger, you started to drink more often, you’ve been lying to me about smoking for who knows how long. You act like you don’t have friends or loved ones who want to help you, like you don’t have resources.”
Bucky swallows. “I don’t need help. I’m fine.”
You take a shaky breath. “Then I’m moving out.”
Bucky’s eyes widen and his heart drops. “You’re gonna move out because I started drinking more and smoking again?”
“No, I’m moving out because I cannot and will not watch you destroy yourself. I come home drained. Not from work but from guessing what you’re going to be like. I want to do anything but come home to you and it shouldn’t be like that.”
Bucky runs a hand over his face. “What happened to through thick and thin? You’re gonna abandon me because I’m trying to work through some things?” 
“Bucky I’ve been with you through thick, and I’ve been with you through thin. But you haven’t. I can’t be two people.”
“Well sorry that I can’t be the perfect boyfriend.” He rolls his eyes.
“I’m not asking for perfect. I’m asking for you to do the bare minimum and I’m not even getting that.”
“So me sharing everything with you is not enough?”
“Bucky, you only share halfhearted things! You tell me what you had for lunch and then your upcoming missions. I don’t know much about who you were growing up or what your favorite color is. I want to know all of you and you only want to share a fraction of that.”
“Do you really think it’s easy for me to share the things Hydra did to me? The things I did?”
“I’m not saying it’s easy. And I’m grateful that you shared bits of that, but you are moving backwards. You won’t even go see your therapist!”
“I don’t need some shrink to tell me the fucked up things I’ve done. I don’t need someone who doesn’t understand what it was like to be a fucking science experiment try to ‘decode’ me. Therapy doesn’t work.” Bucky takes another step towards you and softens his voice. “And I don’t need you to see how truly broken I am.”
“Bucky, I only see you. I see a man who has overcome all of these terrible things and is trying to right his wrongs. But I can’t see all of him when he’s starting to pull away from me. And you can’t say therapy doesn’t work when you’ve only been to 3 sessions and haven’t been back in months.”
“Fine, I’ll share things with you. Is that what you want? I’m not going to see some shrink, bringing up the past is… it has too many memories.”
You sigh and shake your head. “I need space, you need time. I can’t keep living like this, seeing you deteriorate in front of my eyes.”
Bucky finally lets himself break, his eyes water and his voice cracks. “For how long?”
“Until you show me you’re trying to get better.”
Bucky swallows. “And if I don’t?”
You shake your head. “You’re going to try.”
Bucky nods. You take a deep breath and wipe the tears staining your cheeks. It bothers you how much you’ve been crying the past few days but it’s been a long time coming.
“I’m going to go get more of my things.” Bucky nods, not able to say anything to you.
As you move towards the bedroom, Bucky sits back down on the couch. How is this real? He thought to himself. He knows that his actions have consequences, but you are the best thing that has happened to him. Was it because he was too selfish? Should he have known that all good things come to an end?
But you were willing to come back to him. You wanted him to get better. And he knows that the selfish part of him isn’t going away when it comes to you.
You exit the bedroom with another big bag of your things. Bucky looks up and stands.
“I don’t know what to say.” You try to take in every feature of his. “I’m probably going to stay with Natasha for a few days, then I’m going to talk with Tony about a more permanent solution.”
Bucky nods, not being able to bring himself to talk. You feel a pang in your heart, not wanting to leave him but knowing that it’s what's best.
“I guess I’ll see you around.” You walk towards the door.
Bucky finally speaks up. “Stay safe.”
You turn around and give him a small broken smile. “You too.”
As the door closes behind you, Bucky can feel everything around him shake. He sits on the couch, his head in his hands. Bucky lets out a cry, gasping for breath.
His whole world had left.
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tinytinyblogs · 20 hours ago
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Hi! I don’t know if you take requests but y’know how you did the yandere series w/ Stray Kids? Is it possible if you do the reverse of that? The reader the yandere and the members the victim? If it’s too much you don’t have to do it, I just thought with your writing it would be good. Have a great day/night/sleep 🧷🐣
This Is Not Love
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When love isn't as sweet as they expected
Hyung line, Maknae line (coming soon)
💬 I've been away for quite a while—I know! Sorry for the delay, but I'm finally back and ready to start writing again.
Stray Kids Masterlist 1.0 & 2.0
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Your insights and reactions make these posts come alive. Love reblogs, comments, and all the good vibes welcome ✨
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Chan
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Over time, as your yandere tendencies began to surface, Chan couldn’t help but notice the subtle shifts in your behavior. At first, it was small things—the way your eyes lingered a little too long when he talked to others, or how you’d always find excuses to be near him, even when it wasn’t necessary. Then it became more apparent: the possessive grip on his arm, the quiet jealousy when he spent time with the members, the way you seemed to always know where he was, even when he hadn’t told you. Chan, being the observant and empathetic leader he is, didn’t miss any of it. Instead of reacting with anger or fear, he felt concern. He could see the turmoil beneath your actions, the insecurity driving your need to control and cling. One evening, after a particularly intense moment where you lashed out at the thought of him being away from you, he decided it was time to address it. Gently, he took your hand, his touch warm and reassuring. His voice was soft but firm as he spoke. “I see how much you care about me, and I appreciate it. But this… this isn’t healthy. You don’t have to hold on so tightly. I’m not going anywhere.” His words were like a balm to your anxious heart, but he didn’t stop there. Chan, ever the caretaker, made it clear that he cared deeply for you. He held your hand, his thumb brushing over your knuckles in a soothing rhythm, and looked into your eyes with a mix of love and concern.
“I want to help you,” he said. “This isn’t right, and I think you know that too. But I’m here for you. I’ll be by your side while you work on this, okay? You don’t have to do it alone.” His warmth and patience began to break through the walls of your possessiveness. You could feel the sincerity in his words, the way he genuinely wanted to see you heal and grow. It wasn’t just about fixing the relationship—it was about fixing you, and he was willing to stand by you every step of the way. Chan’s unwavering support and gentle guidance started to change something in you. His kindness reminded you that love didn’t have to be about control or fear. It could be about trust, patience, and growth. And with him holding your hand, you felt like maybe, just maybe, you could learn to let go. But Chan, ever the responsible leader, didn’t let his care overshadow the need for boundaries. “I’ll always care about you,” he said, his voice steady. “But you have to promise me you’ll work on this. For yourself, and for us. I’ll be here, but you have to take the steps to fix it. Can you do that for me?” His words were a gentle push, a reminder that while he would support you, the journey to healing was yours to take. And with his hand in yours, you felt a little less afraid to start.
Minho
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At first, Minho tried to brush off your possessive behavior. He noticed the way your eyes would narrow when he mentioned hanging out with friends, or how you’d always find a reason to tag along when he tried to go somewhere without you. It was strange, sure, but he figured it was just a phase—something that would pass with time. He is trying hard to understand why you act that way. Is it because you love him that much? He really wants to see it in a positive light, even though he knows something feels off about your behavior. But as the days went by, your actions became more intense. You started making excuses to keep him from meeting his friends, guilt-tripping him whenever he tried to leave, and even showing up unannounced at places you knew he’d be. It was suffocating, and Minho, who valued his independence and personal space, found himself growing more and more frustrated. One day, after you tried to stop him from meeting his friends yet again, he finally reached his limit. He turned to you, his expression a mix of annoyance and disbelief, and said bluntly, “You’re acting weird. Stop following me. I’m just meeting my friends—it’s not a big deal.” His words were sharp, but they came from a place of honesty.
Minho wasn’t one to sugarcoat things, and he couldn’t pretend your behavior was okay anymore. An argument might arise from this statement—he doesn’t like how the relationship makes him so unhappy. Shouldn't it be sweet instead of feeling this way? He didn’t like this side of you—the clinginess, the possessiveness, the way you seemed to want to control his every move. It wasn’t healthy, and he knew it. If things didn’t change, Minho made it clear that he wouldn’t stick around. He valued his freedom and his relationships with others too much to let anyone—even you—dictate how he lived his life. “If this keeps up,” he said, his tone firm but calm, “I’m stepping out. I can’t do this if it’s going to be like this.” Minho wasn’t cruel, but he wasn’t going to compromise his boundaries either. He hoped you’d understand and take steps to change, but if the situation became worse, he wouldn’t hesitate to walk away. For Minho, self-respect and peace of mind were non-negotiable, and he’d protect them—even if it meant leaving you behind. He truly believes you should work on yourself—he won't tolerate such an unsettling relationship.
Changbin
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At first, Changbin found your clinginess endearing. The way you always wanted to be near him, the way your eyes lit up when he was around—it made him feel loved and protected. He even thought it was cute, smiling sweetly at you whenever you clung to his arm or insisted on spending every moment together. Since he is also the clingy type, he doesn’t mind it. “Aww, you really want me all to yourself, huh?” he’d tease, his voice warm and affectionate. But as time went on, your behavior started to shift. What once felt like sweet devotion began to feel overwhelming. You’d interrupt his gym sessions, showing up unannounced and insisting he spend time with you instead. Or you’d sabotage his studio time, making excuses to pull him away from his work. At first, Changbin tried to brush it off, telling himself it was just your way of showing love. But deep down, he couldn’t ignore the growing confusion and frustration. One day, after you interrupted yet another studio session, Changbin decided to address it. He took a deep breath, his tone gentle but firm.
“Hey, let’s trust each other, okay? I know you care about me, and I care about you too. But I need my space sometimes—to work out, to make music, to just… be me. You get that, right?” Changbin wasn’t quick to judge you. He understood that your actions came from a place of love, even if they were misguided. He didn’t want to hurt you, and he hoped that by talking things through, you’d see how important it was for both of you to have balance in the relationship. But if things didn’t improve—if your possessiveness continued to escalate—Changbin knew he’d have to take a firmer stance. He cared about you deeply, but he also cared about his own well-being and his passions. If it came to it, he’d sit you down and make everything crystal clear. “I love you,” he’d say, his voice steady but serious, “but this isn’t healthy. We need to trust each other, or this isn’t going to work.” Changbin’s heart was big, but so was his sense of self-respect. He’d give you the chance to change, to grow, but if the situation became too much to handle, he wouldn’t hesitate to set boundaries—even if it meant stepping back for the sake of both of your happiness.
Hyunjin
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At first, Hyunjin found your intense love for him incredibly romantic. The way you doted on him, protected him, and made sure he felt cherished—it melted his heart. He couldn’t help but smile when you went out of your way to take care of him, showering him with attention and affection. To Hyunjin, it felt like you were showing him just how much he was worth, and it made him feel truly loved. “You really love me that much, huh?” he’d say with a soft laugh, his eyes sparkling with gratitude. But as time went on, your love began to take on a more obsessive tone. You started stalking his every move—showing up unexpectedly at his dance practices, keeping tabs on his schedule, and even monitoring his interactions with others. At first, Hyunjin tried to brush it off, telling himself it was just your way of caring. But slowly, a sense of unease crept in. He began to question whether this was normal, whether this was how love was supposed to feel. The more your behavior intensified, the more Hyunjin felt trapped. He found himself panicking, his mind racing with doubts. Is this right? Is this how a relationship should be?
He valued his freedom and his individuality, and the thought of losing them scared him. One day, when your actions crossed a line—perhaps by confronting someone he was talking to or demanding he cancel plans to be with you—Hyunjin finally reached his breaking point. His emotions spilled over in a dramatic, tearful confrontation. “I love you,” he said, his voice trembling, “but this… this isn’t okay. You can’t control me like this. I need my freedom. I need to be able to live my life without feeling like I’m being watched all the time.” Tears streamed down his face as he poured his heart out, his dramatic nature amplifying the intensity of the moment. “I care about you so much, but this isn’t how love should work. Love is supposed to make us feel safe and happy, not trapped and scared. Please… understand that.” Hyunjin’s words were raw and heartfelt, a plea for balance and understanding. He didn’t want to lose you, but he also couldn’t lose himself in the process. If things didn’t change, he knew he’d have to make the difficult decision to step back—not because he didn’t love you, but because he loved himself enough to know he deserved a love that was healthy and free.
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mscherub · 17 hours ago
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Just Friends…
Ace Trappola x Reader (Valentine’s Day Special)
Reader is gender neutral; referred to as Prefect, Y/N
Warnings: Angst, BUT HELLA COMFORT AND MUCH LOVE YES YES, HAPPY ENDING, sorry y’all, oh and spelling mistakes, as usual <3
Due to Ace getting his UM and because of his dream, I just felt like I had to write a little something for Valentine’s Day so my mind can rest and stop thinking abt it, like it’s consuming me so much
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You had eyes on you all the time at NRC, gaining the love and trust of many a man, multiple suitors that were rich and could provide, men who were prominent figure heads and widely known across the world with the title of “world class famous,” or, “Next in line for throne,” “Prince,” men who mattered more than just another somebody like him. What can he offer? Friendship, sure, but it doesn’t go beyond that, does it? Ace wishes it did, wishes it will, but wishing can only give you false hope, and that false hope can only get you so far in a lifetime and feed your delusions until it can’t anymore, leaving you to accept the nasty truth.
Granted he shouldn’t feel this way, you and him are friends, nothing more, nothing less, and friends aren’t supposed to feel that way towards one another, it’s wrong, because you’re just friends. Yet, whenever he sees another trying to flirt with you, trying to take you, he can’t help but feel that bad taste of jealousy which he’s grown to know so well when being around you. He hates it, hates you, hates the others who want you, because he loves you.
So, all he can do is sit by your side and watch— watch as others try and sway you into their favor with these stupid little chocolates on this stupid little day. Why did everyone have to like you? He gets it, no, he does, you’re favored and sickeningly sweet, but he still hates it, but he wants you to be happy more importantly, so he’ll sit by, cheer you on, try and act like his usual self, and maybe forget he’s even felt any of this for you, push it all away and hide it, for yours and his sake.
Because again, you’re just friends, and he needs to accept soon that you two could never be more…after all, you’d end up leaving one day and never think of him again, huh?
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
“Prefect! You have a lot of cards and boxes of chocolate it seems…” Deuce chuckles as he watches you walk in, scanning your desk to view all of the items about them.
Your seat has a reasonable amount of letters and chocolates piled up, all addressed to you of all people. Grim will have a field day.
Ace is in the seat next to yours like usual, but he rests his chin on the palm of his hand, a sour expression gracing his face.
“Mad you didn’t get any chocolates?” You smirk as you walk over to him, picking up one off he boxes from the place you sit and inspecting it with a critical eye, noticing it was a brand sold in town. You weren’t expecting chocolates, especially not this many.
“No…not yet, at least.” He huffs, side eyeing you in the process. “Didn’t know that many people liked you.” He sighs, his tone of voice more somber and sullen sounding, a contrast to how he usually is. It wasn’t what he was aiming for.
“Not yet?“ you hum. You take your seat and you open one of the letters. “I didn’t think this many liked me either. I thought I was hard to get along with…”
“Far from it…” he murmurs, you hardly catching what he said.
“What was that?”
“F-far from being hard to get along with because you are impossible to get along with.” He argues back quickly, the stutter not going unnoticed by you.
“Aw, thanks. But, I thought Valentine’s Day was where you were supposed to be nice to people, dickhead.” You make a small click with your tongue and you read over the letter.
It’s short and sweet, just a small thank you from a random student, them thanking you for being such a big help around NRC and helping their housewarden. At least someone thanked you finally…
Grim hums happily as he opens up a box and begins to eat the chocolate residing inside. There’s no use in reprimanding him because he’ll continue to do it, anyways.
“Be careful, Grimmy, eat too many and you could get sick.” You gently remind him as you open another letter, the contents basically saying the same thing as the last, short and sweet.
Ace continues to watch, his shoulders tensing even more and his brows furrowing in disdain, but when you glance over at him, he changes his look to a curious one, smirking and then poking fun at you for all the admirers you’ve gained, a ploy to hide his true pining after you.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
The day continued to go on, Ace becoming more and more out of his element with each passing moment. He could usually push it off, play it off just fine all the time, he had to, but today was the true test to see just how long he could keep pretending.
Riddle gave you a bouquet of roses, not romantically, he said, but Ace could tell Riddle meant it that way, a glimmer of adoration in his eyes as he watched you take them.
Leona just gave you money randomly, telling you to buy yourself something nice with it, a gift from him to you. Azul gave you a free meal pass to use at the lounge, and of course you already have the unlimited access to join him in the VIP lounge whenever you need a break.
Kalim gave you many luxury chocolates and jewelry, which Jamil said he strongly had him double down on everything he considered buying. Vil had your uniform altered and gave you skin care items, a gentle smile on his stupid face as he watched you take them from his hands, Ace noticing his gaze lingering longer than usual.
Idia gave you a gaming console for Ramshackle so you could have entertainment if you’d ever find the time to wind down. And Malleus, he gave you even more than Kalim, gold and jewels that fit your complexion, he didn’t really understand the holiday and got advice from Lilia, but Ace knew Malleus understood the implications behind it at least.
They’re just a bunch of show offs is all, he doesn’t even like you…yea, no he doesn’t. Just friends. They could give you so much better than he ever could, and that’s clear based on how he didn’t even get you anything for this special day.
But…here you are, lugging it all back, talking to him, and only him as he helps you, him being the person you asked to help you in the first place. Deuce and Grim were back at Heartslabyul, so it really was just you and him right now, and it didn’t help with his overthinking. It refueled his selfish desires that maybe, just maybe—
“Ace…open the door, please.” You pant as you make small grunts from the weight of the items in your arms, dragging the bags off stuff up the stairs.
“Of course, anything for you, huh…man, you’re just so spoiled anymore.” He shakes his head and opens the door.
“Thanks…and it’s not like I wanted all of this…it just came my way. Anyways, thanks for helping. You didn’t have to.” You sigh as you set the stuff down in the entry way.
“You asked me to, why should I deny that?” He mutters as he sets the other bags down next to yours.
“Dunno…you seemed out of it today…you miss your ex or something?” You smirk and you elbow him. Usually he took well to jokes…
“As if, I ghosted her for a reason, and why are you bringing that up? That was middle school, dumbass…” he sighs.
“I was just trying to be funny, sorry…” you back away and you flex your hands to stretch them out from gripping the bags so tight.
“Yea, yea…whatever. Is that it? I gotta study so—“
“Actually…can you stay a bit longer? I actually needed some help with baking…”
“Why not just ask Trey…he’s better at it—“
“Ace…that’s not the point here. Come help me.” You smile your usual gentle and sweet smile that could cause anyone to fold, or maybe it was just him thinking that. It was sad for him to be acting like this, at least to him.
He reluctantly follows you into the kitchen and you pull out the materials to bake a cherry pie.
“It’s your favorite, right?” You hum thoughtfully as you go to wash off the cherries.
“I’m surprised you remembered.” He murmurs.
“Of course I would. What type of person would I be if I forgot one of my closest friend’s favorite food? I’d be an asshole, that’s what.” You chuckle.
Right, just friends. Any hope he had was dwindling away ever so slowly…
“Can you make the pie crust? I’ll work on the filling, or vice versa, pick your poison.” You chuckle.
“I’ll do the pie crust.” And he does with little complaint. You two work together to make a…well, sort of presentable pie.
It’s quite while you two work away at each needed ingredient, putting it into the oven sooner than later. Hey, at least it tastes good! The appearance of it didn’t really matter.
“I think we outdid ourselves.” You chortle as you cover your mouth while chewing.
“Eh, it’s ugly.” He shrugs.
“Don’t say that. It tastes pretty good, so, I’m not complaining here.” You shake your head.
“You’re so weird.” He sticks his tongue out at you.
“Heyyyy, be nice— oh, actually, wait here a moment, I have to get something real quick.” You scoot back in your chair and you get up, leaving the kitchen and heading upstairs to your room to grab something.
A few minutes pass by and Ace waits alone impatiently at the table. He drags his fork around the plate, moving the extra bits of crust from the pie and toying with his food as he waists for you to return.
“Ace! Can you actually come here for a second! I need help!” You yell from upstairs. He quirks an eyebrow and he stands up himself, following the sound of your voice.
He enters your room and sees nothing, tilting his head out of confusing, but you tap him on the shoulder from behind, earning a small flinch from him. You keep your other hand holding something behind your back.
“Hey…”
“What’re you doing…” he suspiciously narrows his eyes at you and he turns to face you.
“Shhh, just give me a moment will you? I’m actually nervous now…” you clear your throat. “Look. I don’t wanna sound like a huge sap or anything, and I also wish I had more to show for my appreciation I feel towards you, but alas, I’m broke, so, there’s that factor, too.” You pull out a small box from behind you.
“For you. From me to you. Happy Valentine’s Day, Ace…”
He stares at the box in shock, disbelief, just utterly and completely confused.
“I…why?” Is all he can manage to murmur out.
“I thought it was obvious, but it’s cause I like you, you big dummy, big big dummy.” You sigh, urging him to take the box with a small shimmy of your hand.
“They’re homemade, Trey helped me so—“
“Why…”
“Huh…why what?” You tilt your head incredulously.
“Why like me…” he sighs out, sounding pathetically weak.
“Why should I like you? Does that really matter…” you murmur back.
“No offense, Prefect, you got all those other gifts from the other guys and…I don’t…I’m not following here, I thought you liked one of them. You know, Malleus is a pretty cool guy, rich—”
“But I don’t.” You take his hand and you put the box of chocolates in them. “I like you…”
“Why…” he sighs again, his hand trembling under yours. This moment didn’t feel real to him, far from it. He couldn’t come to terms that you liked him.
“If you want me to sound like Rook, I can…I like you because you’ve been here for me since day one of being plopped into this unfamiliar and unforgiving world, you’ve stuck by my side and never questioned really why I was here or my origins, instead defending me from others and always looking out for me. All you did was that and I…fear I fell harder than I thought…I mean, I get it if you don’t like me back—“
Without a second thought he moves to hug you, clinging to your form desperately as he uses you as a way to ground himself to the moment, to really gauge if it’s real. You hug him back and you let him lean against you.
“You ok?”
“I like you, too, no…I’d go as far as saying I love you. Can I say that yet?” He murmurs out with a shaky voice.
“Of course you can…I love you, too.”
“I love you, more…” he sighs, pulling away to look you in the eyes. “You’re so stupid.”
“No way…not me.” You smile. He smiles right back with a lovesick look and he inches his face closer to yours, practically crashing his lips against yours.
You smile against his lips and as you pull away, you both chuckle and hug each other tight again.
“Mmm, better not ghost me like you did your Ex…” you tighten your grip around him.
“Seriously? Don’t bring her up, she’s the past…plus, I couldn’t do that easily to you, anyways…so…we’re not just friends anymore, right?” He sighs out.
“Far from it now, Acey…we’re more.”
You two stay like that for a moment, staying glued to each other as you both finally come to the realization that this moment is, in fact, real, and that you two won’t have to hide your feelings anymore.
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Done, done, and done. Sorry this one was shorter, but I did like writing it, not my favorite tho…rereading it I’m like “ehhhhh wtf was I on,” Also don’t rlly ask what I was going for towards the end cause idek myself, dont ask questions to what I have no answers to <3
Requests are open for Valentine’s Day!
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Pictures belong to Disney Twisted Wonderland but are edited by me :)
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