#not staying within the lines
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March 16, 2023 - Thursday | 86/89 of Winter
Small joys of life: a friend calling me urgently because she needs help fighting a Genshin boss, having long and engaging discussions thru chat with a friend about silly things, and one of my mom’s friends who made some pit-ha (dessert) and brought it to my mom because my mom once mentioned to her that I really enjoyed them.
#just thinking abt the love u have for someone because they are associated with someone you love#like i dont see that auntie that often tbh and yet#love is such a curious thing it just expands and spreads#and bleeds into ppl like ink on paper#not staying within the lines#studyblr#notes#studyspo
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Kingdom Hearts 3 - Rage Form
#kingdom hearts 3#kh3#sora#rage form#arendelle#formchange#my gif#rage form is so intriguing#sora still behaves in a wild animalistic fashion similar to his anti form but it's different#anti form felt as if he relinquished all self control and acted strictly on instinct just like a heartless#he used to run around hunched over on all fours and fight tooth and claw with reckless abandon#but here you can at least see SOME semblance of who he is. he's able to wield his keyblade while in this form which is pretty major#he still fights in an absolutely chaotic and primal manner but it feels evolved#the big difference is you call upon rage form at will. he channels his rage and darkness in a desperate last resort to stay alive#which is very significant but he still loses some control like the ability to use of magic; items; shotlocks; etc#it's cool to see darkness used in this way but i really want sora to able to explore themes of darkness within himself in future games#i want these to be more than cool forms with fun gameplay. i want them to have implications that something dark is brewing and needs to be-#brought to the surface and tackled head on because we've never seen anyone capable of cloaking themselves in darkness in such a way#take riku's dark form for example. he's in control and he's very much still himself. it's entirely different#on another note i'm now thinking about how hp is fully restored when activating rage form but you have the choice to give it up again-#when using risk charge. it'll increase attack damage but you're still walking a dangerous line in the pursuit of power
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#I MAY BE MOVING???????????????????????#listen my dad.........offered to let me live with him for a bit................bc its a WHOLE lot easier to get a job where he lives than#where my mom lives...........and while it will be cramped and id be sleeping on his living room floor...........id be living so close to#the beach............to places always hiring..........within walking distance so i dont need to worry about a car..............i wouldnt#have to pay rent...............i also despise where i live now bc its bible belt lite and 6 of my neighbors have trump signs#one actually has a whole ass flag they fly directly next to their usa flag but i digress#i adore where my dad lives i love it so much AND its less than half an hour from where my grandparents live#and i know for a fact theyd love having me closer to them and staying with them on weekends#idk im really considering this and esp after all the traveling ive been doing i am BrokeTM and i need to get something lined up#as soon as physically possible. esp if i somehow do end up getting into a grad school in the uk i will need money saved up#IDK IM REALLY EXCITED ABOUT THE POSSIBILITY OF MOVING!!!!! BEACH I LOVE U SO MUCH!!!!!!!!#personal
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sharing silly discord doodles because honestly their antics give me sm serotonin
i'll do silent tags this time as not to clog notifications, but for reference:
Sagittarius belongs to @/west-brooke & Xor belongs to @/snailsnaps 😌
#when the brainrot hits#it MIGHT be nova's fault xor fell down the stairs#we will never know#the goofies /aff#i may or may not have a notes thread of various shenanigans that the three got into#fully intend to doodle more of them sorry rip your peace ✌️#anyway ☺️#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rise of the tmnt#rottmnt fanart#tmnt#e stars scribblez#my art#real talk tho if anyone prefers to keep stuff entirely to the discord you are welcome to lemme know <3#i try to stay within lines of non-spoilerly stuff anyway but just in case :3#ACK my bangs are ALL in my face the 2006 emo hair is BETRAYING my sensory issues today ackblegh-#rise nova#rise xor#rise sagittarius#breaking news: birdman makes ill-advised decision to care about two trouble-prone turtles! more at 8#cyberspace duo#turtlesona#risesona#tmnt oc#save rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#unpause rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#explodingstar art
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complaint incoming.
#WHY are there no patcapvers fics.#(other than 'another place another time' which is fantastic. but it's the ONLY ONE)#genuinely I thought the internet was all for 'he has two hands'#do none of you like threesomes anymore. what happened.#we (fandom spaces) used to be a real country (poly ships)#genuinely it's like. there's this invisible barrier that necessitates either capvers OR patcap#which I understand if you're staying strictly within the canon time line#havers and pat are 40 years appart. I get it.#but for how much fic I've seen that bends and manipulates and cooks up all kinds of timelines and aus and random ghost logic#NONE of it is used in the name of patcapvers.#am I the only human being on the planet that sees two viable captain ships and thinks. smush em together.#am I crazy#bbc ghosts#patcapvers#when someone finally writes a patcapvers smut fic I can go to my grave#unfortunately I guess I might have to write it
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just a few little bits from the past few days
#both the word count screenshots are from the same day - just different sections of the text. so that was like 4000 words in#one DAY.. huzzah!! (< making up for the fact that I did 0 words the 3 days before that lol.. so its not actually an accomplishment ghjjh)#In renpy I think you can have multiple separate texty cody whatever documents and still jump between them so long as they;re#labeled properly. Rather than like... having one extremely long 60.000 line file where in some places youre in a menu within a menu#within a menu within a menu within a menu within a menu within a menu jhbhj#But that was the way I started doing it lke 5 years ago when I actually made the base of everything so I feel like it'd be too much#work to change it all that dramatically now. But that means I cant just get the word count for the whole document I just have#to jump around to the few sections I worked on and highlight them to get the word count for only that portion#.. the one tiny fraction of the whole monster text wall. Though it is of course spaced out and organized into#clearly labeled sections within that because otherwise I have trouble discerning text on a screen. still.#Resuming a project that's been basically abandoned for 4-5 ish years is just always finding weird stuff like.. why did I do this that way..#why did I write that... why did I organize that in this manner... what the hell am I referencing in this note... etc. lol#Anyway... also......................cat with plum on his head.#everyone point and laugh at mr. plum head boy..!!!!!!!!!!!!! >:3c#I've been obsessed with Calico Critters' social media presence from afar (like how I mentioned one of my possible dream jobs would#be to be the person that sets the scenes and arranges all the toy animals at a tiny little table and etc. to take the type of pictures they#post on their facebook page and stuff) and I see all their photos of them posing the rabbits as if they're in a swimming pool#or on a nature hike or etc. etc. BUT I have never really seen them in person. Recently I was at a store (in a KN95 mask and not staying#very long still of course. wastewater covid levels are still high where I live (and most of the US truly)) and it just crossed my mind#to actually go to the toy section and see if I could find any....wow.... Its like meeting a celebrity.. the Latte Cats....#Of course I didnt buy them because they're like... very expensive?? like $25 - $40 just for one little pack of a few critters like#what is shown. but.... I still got to see them................ my beloved.. I want their outfits... T o T#Oh and then lastly just a pot of purple clover looking things. I just think theyre neat lol#photo diary
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I'm alive 🫡🫡🫡
#hurricane wasnt as bad as it could've been but we did have a tornado within 2 miles of the house 😭😭😭 took down all the power lines#they wanted me to come into work tonight perhaps kill yourselves ? we got emergency messages saying to stay off the roads#so the first responders and power guys can do their jobs no im not fucking coming into work ????#all the streetlights and streetlamps are off too id be driving in PITCH BLACK yall can eat my ass fr#j.txt
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looking at the lyrics of color your night and seeing the ryomina of it all..............
it's about someone experiencing the things you already know for the first time. it's about having your perspective of the things in your life become dulled and indifferent through familiarity but get brightened by seeing someone else's eyes sparkling at the sight of the same things. it's about seeing the joys of the small things again through the eyes of another.
it's about having your life colored in by learning to live!!!!!
#p3#.d#persona 3 reload#ryomina#'how these plain and simple scenes get painted so vividly by you / i just wanna stay with you'#it's like in the 3rd movie when minato when he when the. when ryoji. the. when.#remember how p3 movie 3 was about ryoji taking minato by the hand and showing him how wonderful every day could be just by living them#also the horrors#but mostly the first part#listening to this song on loop for the past 5 days and accidentally thought about ryoji#who my mind immediately snatched up and assigned azumi's lines to him#also made me think of ryoji sitting in a room in minato's head like he's watching a livestream and pogging at everything minato gets to do#anyway in a similar vein it's like when you ask about someone's obsession/favorite thing#bc it's just so lovely to hear them talk so passionately about something they clearly enjoy#'within the inner heart i plead / for you to talk to me / i wanna hear all the good and bad / the new stories you have'#love this part
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i emailed my boss saying he needs to talk to the people developing a satellite i’m working on (unpaid) bc they’re giving me too much work and it’s unsustainable please clap
#the whole point of doing this free development for them is to be first in line for money to do the science once it’s launched#but the launch date has been pushed back AGAIN and now it’s getting launched after my contract ends#so if i don’t get my own funding to stay at this research institute i’ll be gone before science funding for this satellite comes through#and all this free work will be for nothing#except the vague nebulous statement on my cv that i’ve worked on satellite development#anyway this project is flat broke so i doubt they’ll pay me to do the work they want#so maybe no one will do the work? not my problem frankly#anyway i told them today that i won’t be able to do work on this satellite for the next three weeks bc i have two conferences#and a paper revision deadline within the next 3 weeks that will take all my time#and they asked me to do HOURS of work TOMORROW#so that is apparently my breaking point#and they clearly don’t listen to me when i say im overloaded so maybe they will listen to my boss
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if it wouldn’t be too much of a hassle, would you mind sharing what markers, sketch pencils, and pens you use to draw traditionally?
no hassle at all! i'm happy to share! here's a photo summary of the tools i use:
all in all, i use a variety of tools, and a good majority of my tools are from the dollarstore, walmart, or were a gift. i personally find working with inexpensive tools helps me feel more free to use my tools. even my sketchbooks are from the dollarstore.
ultimately it's not the tools that are important, but the artist who learns how to use the tools to make the art they want. sure there are limitations and challenges to working in traditional art, but that's also what makes it fun! so no matter what you use—traditional or digital tools—have fun with it!
happy drawing! ❤️
#ask the crab#also i never use all of these tools for one thing#i use like 1 sketching tool 1 clean up tool 1 line art tool and then for colouring i like to stay within a limited palette of ~3 colours#so if it looks like a lot of stuff don't worry i don't use them all at once#but they are all scattered around my desk...#oh forgot to mention#the only time i use a pencil is for making guidelines for comic panels and writing down dialogue#because pencil is the only thing that cleanly erases#what pencil i use? whichever one i can find and still has lead
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I feel like you would be someone who would appreciate this. You know the post that's like "can't come back from the dead wrong if you just never die stays alive wrong stays alive wrong stays ali-"
Maedhros manages to be both Came Back Wrong and also Stays Alive Wrong…
-@outofangband
how did you know i have been completely unable to stop thinking about that post with him for like. Months now. Every Time i see it i wanna tag him whwhwhwwn like
it’s the coming back from literal hell. it’s the coming back from something that changed you fundamentally and permanently. it’s maedhros and his fire motif that’s also a life motif and it’s maedhros living far past the point where it feels like his spirit has died. and also it’s him literally Staying Alive Wrong in the sense of not being allowed death in angband like i think about your posts about him dying and being Not Allowed To Stay Dead through necromancy every single time i see it im just [bites things bites things bites things bites things BITES THINGS]
#i am. way way too much of a sucker for Those Lines. you know the ones.#what if i mentally put them next to each other and then chewed glass about it#the fire of life was hot within him!!! he was as one that returns from the dead!!!!!!!!#aaAAAAaAa Anyway aaa#yeah no you got me you absolutely nailed me i am. thinking about this CONSTANTLY you are hitting me RIGHT in the brainworms with this ask#stays alive wrong stays alive wrong stays alive wrong……#silm#nelyo askbox
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#telling myself to stay cautiously optimistic for the transformers one movie#but I keep seeing little clips and getting more and more excited#those first trailers did the film DIRTY#but like even seeing the characters in motion has me really appreciating the designs#and like#the way they look kinda 3d printed with the lines within the metal and all the reflections and colours and#I still have 2 weeks to go till it releases I'm gonna bite#honestly tho Steve Buscemi??? as Starscream??????#I'm kinda... loving it????#if I had a nickel for every time my favourite Starscream was voiced by a Steve#I'd have two nickels#which isn't a lot but it's weird its happened twice#xD#transformers
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I was describing DFF to a friend from CQL fandom and she said New with Non sounded kind of like Huaisang with Mingjue, and it def clarified a lot for me about how I feel about both avenging brothers.
The ends don't justify the means, the cats and children and working class servants murdered along the way aren't erasable casualties in the name of a true justice, and these avengers are fundamentally unhinged, twisted, broken people, not righteous seekers of fairness in the world. But I love that both of them are driven by real desperation and are frantic and messy in how much they need to make their revenge happen at any cost; someone trying to burn the world down in their grief, and actually taking the good parts of the world and themselves down along with their target(s), adds so much texture and dimension to the narrative for me.
I love a justice story and an ethical revenge, but for example w/ The Glory, even though that's for me the best it's ever been done, we still have things like a woman being victim-blamed for her rape and drug addiction as narratively acceptable modes of vengeance. I find something freeing in a story that isn't about punishment and who deserves what, but just about the emotional depths people are driven to by loss and rage and the unfairness of a world with no accountability.
#i hope that makes sense i should not be on the computer rn#like it's not just that it's a tragedy and no one wins or something#i'm deeply sympathetic to huaisang and new - honestly they rip my HEART out#but it doesn't mean i think they're making all or even mostly righteous choices#it's similar to how i feel about ter from 3 will be free when he goes around murdering all my favorite side characters#sometimes the wrongness and cruelty of who they hurt for their revenge makes it more honest for me#than if they actually managed to stay within lines of presumable fairness#and also like i said i love the desperation and franticness#huaisang was not murdering cats because he decided the cats had it coming#he was trying to stay one step ahead of a brilliant+ruthless master strategist and making absolutely bugfuck choices in the name of that#i wonder how new was supporting himself and his DRUG LABORATORY after he stopped getting that allowance#did he at some point leave school like tee did and just work during the day and do revenge chemistry at night#i'll never stop thinking about how alone he was this entire time too#men will literally spend years refining a murder hallucinogen instead of go to therapy#dead friend forever#dff#new prathipsit#mdzs#nie huaisang#dear diary
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THEY COULD HAVE SKIPPED THE LINE SO EASILY. WHY DID THEY GO THROUGH IT INSTEAD OF AROUND IT. WHEN THEY'RE RUNNING THEY DON'T BOTHER WITH THE LINE HUHHH???
#ok like actual last post before i just finish the episode#i feel really bad bc honestly i should just finish it but#percy and annabeth and grover#please.#the line isn't even right next to the river#just go around#is this the 12yo mentality of need to stay within arbitrary conventions regarding lines??#percy jackson#percy jackon and the olympians#pjo tv show#1x07#..
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I'm chillin in my truck, windows down, in the heat. This mud dauber looking wasp mfer barges, checking the place for hidey holes, buzzing all around. Stopped on the dash to tidy up, it turned around and ended up facing me head on. It acted startled to see me, visibly stopped and squared up like, "Oh, shit, didn't see you there". Bonked into the windshield a few times and then exited through the passenger window.
#Sceliphron caementarium#mutetext#i thought it was interesting it literally had like a startle moment where I think it realized another animal was staring at it#wasps are scary but the internet has helped to desensitize me to them#past me wouldve had to exit the truck for awhile#current me just cringed and hoped it didnt land on me lol#theres a yellow jacket nest in an old clothes line pole post and like my spouse wants to torch jt and im like#wellllll if they stay in their lane it shouldnt be too bad and theyll die off once winter hits anyways right???#aughhhh idk#its interesting though to go over and look at them their sentries will track you as you move around the nest#but i guess cause theyre a smaller colony or bc we arent antagonzing them theyre just chillin even when you get within like 2-4 ft of them
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I'm alive 🫡🫡🫡
#hurricane wasnt as bad as it could've been but we did have a tornado within 2 miles of the house 😭😭😭 took down all the power lines#they wanted me to come into work tonight perhaps kill yourselves ? we got emergency messages saying to stay off the roads#so the first responders and power guys can do their jobs no im not fucking coming into work ????#all the streetlights and streetlamps are off too id be driving in PITCH BLACK yall can eat my ass fr#j.txt
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