#not meant to be taken /too/ seriously
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valtsv · 2 years ago
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mephistopheleswasrobbed · 2 months ago
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Finally I'm back to list all of the evidence that Peaceful Property On Sale is gay, actually!
This week again, our boys were fighting out their differences. But while last week they were fighting about class differences and the arrogance of the rich, this week their fight seems a little closer to home (pun intended) as we're talking about (chosen) family and home-cooked food as one of its signifiers. But more on that later. For now:
1
Pangpang's audience have seen Peach and Home interact like three times but they already ship it. Seeing as we, the show's audience, have seen even more of their interactions, and more intimate moments at that, we clearly have to ship even harder.
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2
Home is still going with the pigtail-pulling strategy to deal with his crush.
He tries to make Peach say he's handsome:
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And then he makes Peach dance for him:
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All the while pretending he's doing all of this because he's some kind of old-school Bond villain and not because he likes him.
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3
Aside from their more serious fights, Home and Peach keep bickering in a way that is supremely couple-coded.
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Pangpang has also noticed.
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Peach, at one point, is so busy complaining about Home that he even forgets to be scared of ghosts.
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4
Speaking of people being uncharacteristically unscared: Home also experiences a moment of courage in the face of Peach trembling all over the place, when he steps up to deliver the coffee to Ride.
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The fear only comes back when the ghost appears next to Peach, so. Make of that what you will.
5
Back at their base of operations, Home, very subtly, marks his territory by just plopping down on the siblings' new bed, while the bed owners in question sit on the sofa instead.
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This is now the second time Home has actively chosen to lay on their bed. (It is also the second time he proceeds to stand on their bed once he goes back to fighting with Peach) One has to wonder why he feels so comfortable making himself at home (höhö) in Peach's bed. (It's because of gay, clearly.)
6
Relatedly, Home has given Peach and Pangpang a home in his place. He could have had them move into any of the many properties he owns, but he chose to let them stay in the one place that is "reserved for" him, that clearely means something to him.
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We can see how much this place means to him, both from the flashback and from the fight he starts with Peach over the gas burner. Because it is important to him, he doesn't want it endangered by open fire. However he doesn't just say this, maybe because he doesn't want to appear weak or thinks that the others wouldn't understand or maybe because he's not fully aware of it himself. Instead, when his order is met with protest, he gets grumpy, starts a fight with Peach and leaves.
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Because this bar is important to him and, (even though he might not fully admit it at this point), so is Peach's opinion, he gets visibly disappointed when Peach talks negatively about it after Home offers to let them stay somewhere else,
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only to perk up again and reminice about his grandpa when Peach says that he wants to stay anyway.
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Honestly this, coupled with the ep 1 grandpa flashback about the meaning of "home" is giving me CLW vibes of recently dead (grand-)father meddling from beyond the grave to get his (grand-)son a boyfriend.
7
Once Home has calmed down from his immediate anxiety over the safety of his bar, and has come back because he was lonely and scared by himself, he attempts to genuinely understand why cooking is so important to Peach and why his "solution" of "Just order takeout" was not met with agreement.
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We can even see that he feels a little bad about Peach having to cook with a microwave,
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leading to him compromising and getting them an electric stove at the end.
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(Of course he's still disguising his kindness as a gotcha moment)
8
We learn that Home has been pretty lonely since his parents died, symbolised by his having to eat alone. While he's alone in the masion he doesn't even want to admit his lonelieness out lout to just himself. But when he's talking to Peach in the next scene, he talks about it easily and freely with little to no prompting from Peach. Because he feels safe with Peach.
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This is also why, after Home gets lonley and scared in the mansion, he comes to Peach and Pangpang in the first place. Not to his uncle or Kan or Suradech (we see later in that scene, that he's clearly not too worried disturbing people outside their working hours when he calls Kan). Because being with them (especially Peach) makes him feel safer and less lonely.
9
In parallel to Thansai, who did this with Ride, the guy she liked, Home uses the excuse of having ordered too much food to spend more time with Peach (the guy he likes).
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Credit to almayver for this point, not sure I would have caught that myself.
Adding to that, after the first time where Thansai lies, she does actually order extra food to share with Ride. Home, meanwhile, has ordered too much food from the beginning (sharing it with gramps the first time). He's always orderd extra food because he's always wanted to have someone to share it with. And now he's finally found them (him ^^).
10
After Home opens up to Peach, he lets Home in a little more, in turn, by inviting him to help him with his cooking.
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And even though he words it more like an order than an invitation, Home clearly recognises the olive branch and gets to looking for the soap to wash some vegetables, without any complaint. (Oh Home you sheltered little rich boy) (Although I can't make fun of him too much for this. It sounds exactly like something I would do had I never cooked before)
This leads to the wonderful, very subtle moment of the two of them cooking together under the "Cok Long" sign. (And since there is such a clear shot of this, no one can convince me this wasn't done with full intent)
Peach continuing to warm up to Home, is further exemplified by his willingness to play along with his BS after the successful exorcism
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and the fact that he unconciously prepares a fourth plate for Home at the end of the episode. For which he promptly gets called out by Pangpang.
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11
Peach feels safe with Home. He has (maybe subconciously) taken note of the events of the previous episode, as he's now turning to Home when he gets scared by the ghost.
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Interesting to note, even after he confirms that Ride has left, he doesn't fully let go of Home. Someone's looking very comfortable clutching Home's arm even though there's no ghost anymore.
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12
I think the entire scene of Pangpang calling them the mother and father of their little family speaks for itself.
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It's okay boys, Thailand passed gay marriage, you can both be the dad.
13
And then we get another moment of absolute boyfriend behaviour in the end credits when Home steals Peach's glasses to play with them.
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Him putting the glasses on Kan at the end is also the only moment this episode that could maaaaybe be interpreted as slightly flirtatious towards Kan, but if you do interpret it that way, you also have to admit that he was flirting with Peach a lot more in that scene.
BONUS
Peach didn't punch anyone this episode, so instead I'm bringing you
Lesbians
It startet with them holding hands last week as they fled from Rak
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and turned into bickering over whether or not Kan gets scared by ghosts. (A topic which I assume will give these two grounds for further bickering for at least the next couple of episodes.)
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(Judging by the smirks on Peach and Home's faces whenever these two go at it, Pangpang might not be the only shipper in the group anymore)
When Home doesn't want to come to her party, she proclaims that she "has got Kan", so that's okay, and then batts her eyelashes at Kan.
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Pangpang said "I see your 'emotionally constipated boys trying to pretend they don't like each other' and I raise you 'unashamed and uncompomising flirting sunshine x grumpy style'"
Looking forward to see how Kan will answer that going forward.
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ghostselkie · 8 months ago
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The nevermore characters if they were pinnipeds (seals and seal adjacent animals)
Look seals are my favorite animal, this post was a long time coming. The reason I expanded it to the whole clade is cause some of the cast just don't vibe with any true seals. Lenore - Ribbon seal: Cause color scheme. Also ribbon seals are one of my favorites. They just look so interesting.
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Annabel - leopard seal: One, leopard seals are absolutely beautiful creatures. It's okay if you disagree; pistols at dawn and I won't be needing back up. Two, I heard some one say that leopard seals have "the eyes of an angel, and the mouth of a devil." If that doesn't describe Annabel, idk what does.
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Duke - California sea lion: Immaculate vibes.
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Pluto - Fur Seal: Cause fluffy boys. Their fur is giving the energy of Pluto's dysphoria jacket.
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Morella - Bearded seal: Vibes mostly. Also their whiskers remind me of her freckles.
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Berenice - Walrus: Cause teef.
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Eulalie - Ringed seal: They are some of the cutest seals that exist. Also their range includes the northern most part of Japan.
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Prospero - Mediterranean monk seal: The man is Italian. Though, interestingly enough, their range does not actually include Italy, but monk seals are endangered, so I wanted to include them.
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Montresor - Elephant seal: THEY ARE ASS HOLES!!!
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Ada - Harbor Seal: They are the most common type of seal, but don't tell her that.
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Will - Grey seal: Vibes.
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disordercinema · 6 hours ago
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When Ekko released in 2015 it was so awesome, he had a great voice actor (at least in Brazil his voice is really well known), he had a cool design, fun powers and an amazing backstory. He was a black kid from a poor upbringing who, despite the environment he grew up in, learnt to create incredible things basically out of scrap. He was a genuine hero in a land where most of the characters were bad people or chaotic monsters, he fought for what was right and tried his best to save the people he loved.
Over the years he became the face of resistance in Zaun, every story was about him fighting for the people, every voice line with other champions showed how much people admired him. Fuck, I know it's probably not canon but Azir of all people treats him well in their interactions, that's how cool he is. So it bothers me a little that the freedom fighter/symbol of resistance in Zaun role is being shifted to Jinx in the show.
She, and the Inx (her blue haired followers), are literal antagonists in his game, he has to fight them because all they care about is chaos. I understand though what they are building up to in Arcane and it is very well written, but it makes me a bit sad. Especially because of how I see most of the fandom treat Ekko, most talk about him has to do with Jinx and fair, I guess, Arcane barely gives him solo screen time. But y'know, I wish after this they give him another game or a comic book, Idk. I really don't want Ekko to just become a background character on someone else's narrative.
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what-on-earth-is-love · 1 year ago
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vanoé is the perfect guy yuri ship because vanitas employs the yaoi mentality of "if we touch each other or show too much vulnerability or even look at each other for too long the world is gonna explode or something" while noé employs the yuri mentality of "you're my best friend, my beacon of light in the dark, i'd go to hell and back for you and i'm sure it doesn't say anything out of the ordinary about my feelings for you haha. all perfectly normal here"
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jayykesley · 1 year ago
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i know it was meant to just be a joke but i wasn’t a fan of the narrator cutting in to barbie’s “i’m not pretty anymore” panic with the whole “this would mean more if it wasn’t coming from margot robbie” bc it still reflected the panic of a woman’s appearance changing (along with fears of aging) especially if that woman was still holding on to the idea that her only value as a person *was* her beauty. like, yeah obviously margot robbie is gorgeous but that *internal* feeling of “oh no i’m losing the one thing that heavily contributes to my worth” is something a lot of women struggle with, regardless of whether they fit in to the box of conventional beauty.
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yujeong · 2 months ago
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For the micro story ask, how about number 7 (silent fury) for Pete? With your choice of other character/s <3
Ohhh, that's a good one, my friend, thank you so much ❤️ ----------------------- "Hey, P'Pete." "Hm?" "You used to do boxing, right?" "Ah... yes, why?" "What was your nickname?" "My... what?" "The name you'd been given as a fighter. Like how P'Porsche was called The Phoenix." "Well-" "Silent Fury." "Bro, you're not funny." "What? It suits him, doesn't it?" "It sounds stupid and you know it." "It does sound a little stupid, Vegas." "I only meant to emphasize your strengths, Pete." "You did a bad job." "Shut up, Macau." "Phi never answered the question. What was it?" "I... didn't have one." "You didn't? But why?" "No point for a fighter who's bad at his job." "Pete-" "No, I refuse to accept it. We're giving you one right now... Don't laugh, Phi, I'm being serious!" "Fine, Macau. Do whatever you want. But it can't be Silent Fury." "It suits you-" "Hia won't participate in the brainstorming. Only me and P'Pete." "Okay, that's it. No dinner for you." "Will I not get dinner either, Vegas?" "It depends, Pete. Are you going to behave?" "Ugh, never mind, I'm out of here. You started being gross again." "Food will be ready in an hour!" "You better have finished until then!" "No promises."
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sonknuxadow · 3 months ago
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watching the trailer again and noticing that some of the stages kinda look like theyre from sonic forces and sonic frontiers and i cant tell if im just mixing them up with other stages (because im a #fakefan who doesnt have every stage from every game memorized and never finished sonic heroes and never played sonic 06 at all) or if they actually did that. it would be really weird if they did because if this is supposed to take place during generations those games wouldnt have happened yet. well forces can be explained away with the timeline being so messed up because of the time eater that shadow can see events in the near future that he will be involved in and not just stuff thats already happened. but frontiers would make no sense if im right about that one because shadow isnt in that game .. ? but also some of these shots look really similar to chaos island and kronos island ?
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vulgarmaw · 2 months ago
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Damnit I just thought of an amazing idea for a book series.
Basically an almost obviously corrupt person quickly rises to power. Like insanely quick. They use the turmoil brewing in the country to grab the reigns of power and begin steering the country to dangerous places. Within a few months they've killed or imprisoned every other person who could have made a play for power.
Those people were also very corrupt, but in a much more subtle way.
Then a mysterious writer begins to leave secret messages that lead to websites with artfully written articles about rising up. They talk about the power of humanity and how we all know how to be good to each other.
Slowly the entire country begins to turn on the evil dictator, forcing them to enact draconian laws.
Eventually the mysterious writer goes missing and the country believes the dictator got them.
Together they riot, and overthrow law enforcement and the military. Fighting for their beliefs in people's rights to exist.
Finally the dictator is dead and bleeding out on the floor.
The final paragraph details the dictator being both the evil leader and the writer that polarized the people into action.
The final sentence.
If you cannot find a common cause to overthrow corruption, a common enemy can fill the role.
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moonscape · 3 months ago
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i don't get too deeply in anipoke ships (for the characters that aren't the adults in horizons at least) anymore because i'm 24 and saying anything beyond an "it's cute" is weird for me personally but i will say i have the biggest soft spot for negai i loved them so much as a kid
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paigeofdoodles · 30 days ago
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My friend and I couldn’t stop talking about this island earlier (and making some jokes about some coincidences surrounding his formation), so we decided to personify him for the shits and giggles
I present the island of Surtsey
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neptnzz · 2 months ago
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speaking of vivec. uh VERY messy animatic/comic thing about imagination and manifestation <3 you can do anything if you put your mind to it! you can do ANYTHING
song: soooo - cherry blossom drops, burning spring
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o-uncle-newt · 4 months ago
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I read Possession by AS Byatt after people told me "if you liked Gaudy Night you'll like this" and WELL.
Warning- spoilers for both books abound below!
So it sounded great- as a lapsed academic (though not in the field of literature by any means) there's a part of me that loves reading about academia because it's full of such obsessive people, and this book seemed to be exactly that and so I was excited.
Then I read it, and on the one hand, my first thought was "all these people are dull as heck, the only sane modern-day one is Val, and at the end of the day the historical stuff is just two people having an affair, who cares." My second thought was "there's just enough stuff here that makes me think that maybe the author knows that all of this is stupid, like the fact that Val is obviously one of the few sane ones here." But the ending made me doubt even that. Essentially, and I say this even as that lapsed academic, the author could not convince me to care about the important things at stake here, and as a result couldn't get me to care about the people who only seemed to care about those things.
I didn't care about Ash and LaMotte- they came across as two people high on their own supply who had a tawdry affair. (And each of them is the less interesting person, as a person, than their official partner!) As a result of not caring about them, I couldn't POSSIBLY care about Roland, Maud, and the rest of their crew, because their only functions were to be possessed by, and weirdly possessive of, these two entirely unworthy individuals, whose in-universe historical and literary significance Byatt couldn't convince me of, and to use that possession as a mirror for their own very lame romance. Beyond that they're utterly uninteresting, and there isn't even meant to BE much beyond that so it's not that surprising.
Anyway, I didn't like this book much, but it still made me think a lot. And there's a way in which a certain kind of person might say "well if it made you think then that's surely a sign of some positive quality" and... maybe? I don't know. I didn't hate all of it, and some parts were interesting, and I do have a whole separate list of things about the book that bug me including a breakdown of some of the book's (perceived by me) themes that I particularly disliked lol. Perhaps I'll post it another time. So I guess you can say it spurred me to thought, but loads of things that I don't like do that, and the only positive thing that that draws from me is that they're not downright dull.
The thing is, after finishing the book I was immediately struck by that "if you like Gaudy Night..." element, because it has a situation that felt weirdly similar (if for totally different reasons)- a young scholar stealing a letter from a library/archive. The circumstances are different- in Gaudy Night, the scholar does it to hide its existence so as not to contradict his thesis, and in Possession, the scholar does it so as to explore the document further, though still secretly- but there are still some interesting parallels vis a vis class. Possession goes into the class thing more than Gaudy Night does, but neither book goes much into it- the scholar is lower-class and someone who has scraped their way to their position, and is encumbered by a female partner of lower social and academic standing, and in the end they are juxtaposed against scholars who come from an elevated class and who have more money and opportunity. In Gaudy Night, Arthur Robinson is judged by the likes of Lord Peter Wimsey and a college full of women who don't have to do anything but think, teach, write, and grade papers; in Possession, Roland has to convince a bunch of academics of standing and resources to take a chance on him (and while this is more about money than class, he's the main one who's like "maybe it's good if Lady Bailey gets her wheelchair"). Byatt elides over this at the end by having him magically become in demand and on his way to achieving his academic goals, but I think in both books, the class element really could have taken on more significance in the text.
(I'd add as well that Byatt pits the upper-class and moneyed Maud, who of course is doing things for "the right reasons," vs the evil American businessman who clearly... doesn't care about Ash enough? Despite how much he clearly and obviously cares about Ash? The book was way more interesting when he seemed like a valid rival to the British team, who only thought that they deserved the letters more because of their obsession, rather than how it turned out at the end where the American dude is an actual cartoon villain. What made him genuinely less worthy besides having money without class, and of course having the bad taste to be American? What makes one scholar's possession more justified? Sayers was never this unsubtle.)
So that made me think more about Possession vs Gaudy Night, and the thing is, there are actual living people in Gaudy Night! Say what you will about the unworldliness of the academics at Shrewsbury, but you get a very keen view of their personalities by the end, even as they are (by necessity given the rules of their world) subsumed by academia, or subsume themselves in it. And the people who do fall in love are REALLY in love, and you understand why...
And somehow a book from 1935 feels far more interrogative of the possession (or lack thereof) found in love and romance, and just about the place of women in academia and relationships overall, than one from the late 80s. In Gaudy Night, Harriet accepts Peter once she has determined that despite their power differential (brought on by class, money, history, and to a degree gender) he will not threaten her personhood, because he has proven himself to her. In Possession, Maud accepts Roland because she has the power (money, class, position, even height) and so Roland actually cannot threaten her- and yet still that final scene is about her being taken by him, basically to prove some kind of a point. In contrast, in Busman's Honeymoon, the euphemistic sex scenes are about Peter trying to please Harriet.
When I say it's to prove a point, I'm paraphrasing Byatt, incidentally- who said: "And in the case of Maud I had made it very inhibiting. She was a woman inhibited both by beauty (which actually isn't very good for very beautiful women because they feel it isn't really them people love) and she was also inhibited by Feminism, because she had all sorts of theories that perhaps she would be a more noble kind of woman if she was a lesbian. And so she was a bit stuck. And Roland was timid because I am naturally good at timid men. It's the kind of men I happen to like. He's a timid thinking man, so of course it took him the whole book." I mean... yikes, but also that explains a lot. Maud can only bring herself to be with a man who is weak/effeminate (?) enough to justify whatever weird psyche Byatt has imagined up for her, but still she needs to get over her inhibitions and under him because... reasons. I don't know.
(Height is also interesting here as a point of contrast- Byatt makes Maud taller than Roland to make a point about how on the one hand she retains the power but on the other hand there is now even more of her that has to surrender. Peter and Harriet are the same medium height and wear the same size gown.)
I think the thing that most stuns me is how regressive Possession feels when it comes to gender politics on relationships than Gaudy Night does. I'd need a whole other post to talk about this, but the theme of Possession seems to me to be "relationships that produce things (whether art or children) are worth more than ones that don't." Roland is better with Maud than with Val because Val is a second rate scholar who drags him down (while supporting him financially) and Ash is better with LaMotte than with Ellen because LaMotte didn't only inspire his writing (Ellen's contributions are described only in the negative "didn't impede"), she gave him the child that Ellen refused to. Incidentally, in both cases it's the man pursuing a relationship that will give HIM something... But, to paraphrase Peter in Busman's Honeymoon, one wouldn't want to regard relationships in that agricultural light. Gaudy Night is about how two people can produce great things without each other but choose to be with each other for their own, and each other's, happiness. They aren't each less apart, and as I noted in a prior post, they don't need to solve cases together or conjoin their work in order for their relationship to be worth something. It is worth it for them to be together because it encourages some kind of inner balance within them and between them, as people. They enjoy collaborating but that is by no means the basis of their love (and, incidentally, I think that a lot of, if not most, detective series romances fail this basic test of "would they have fallen in love if they were accountants who met on a dating app." Peter and Harriet definitely would have- would, say, Albert Campion and Amanda Fitton have? I do NOT think so).
And here's the thing- another reason why Byatt's quote above is so off-putting is that it makes it clear that not only in the text but on a meta level, the purpose of the relationships is to prove a Point. I found Roland and Maud to have zero chemistry, and honestly I was expecting them to get together 3/4 of the way through and split up at the end when it turned out they had nothing in common- it seemed like that kind of book. I was kind of stunned when they only got together at the end in an "it's meant to be" way because nothing about it seemed meant to be. They were stuck together by that one thing and they each apparently needed the relationship for some kind of self-actualization or historical rhyming or other. (Whatever I say about Ash and LaMotte... at least they seemed to like each other!)
Peter and Harriet... they get together because they love each other. Do they change over the course of Gaudy Night, and over the course of the other books they share together? Of course they do. But if it makes sense, I'll put it this way- Harriet doesn't accept Peter's proposal as proof that she got over her hangups, Harriet gets over her hangups so that she can accept Peter's proposal. Her hangups only matter because they were keeping her from this particular kind of happiness- she was a fully actualized person even with them. She is a person who does things for human reasons so that she can build a mutually happy life with the person she loves, not a little plot mannequin being moved around in order to tell the author's desired Message. People can say what they want about Gaudy Night and its flaws, but despite the intricacies of its construction, nobody can call the characters' actions and motivations anything but brutally human.
Whether within their universes or on a meta level, the books have SUCH different things to say about the value and nature of love, the place of and purpose of sex, the place of art and intellectual accomplishment in relationships, all of the above in the context of femininity… and I can't help but feel that each time, Gaudy Night wins the contest. It's possible I'm missing something major about Possession, and maybe sometime I'll post the rest of my notes about the things I disliked and people can tell me what I'm wrong about- but if nothing else it made me appreciate Gaudy Night even more, so for that I'm grateful.
#possession#as byatt#gaudy night#dorothy l sayers#lord peter wimsey#harriet vane#i'm not tagging all the characters from possession bc i don't actually really remember their full names and i'm too lazy to look them up#I also saw recs for possession for “if you like jonathan strange and mr norrell” and “if you like jfsp s9”#for jonathan strange and mr norrell i actually have several Thoughts#and am happy to share if asked#but i'm perplexed by the jfsp comparison#though a reading of ellen ash as asexual vs uncle newt would be...interesting#i guess it's based on romances contrasted through time?#also- i've seen people claim that possession is satire#to which i say#BS!!!!#the way that book is written either literally every word of it is satire and none of it is meant to be taken seriously#or it's serious as gospel#the only bits where some parts felt like they might be meant to be “satirical” in relation to other parts#came across more as caricature than anything else#cough cough lesbian feminist american professor... i mean jeez#which reminds me#any future writing i do about why i disliked possession#will have to include my take on that thing some women writers do where they're really WEIRD about how they write women#(sexually but in a way that they THINK is clinical to the point of objectivity)#while barely even describing what the men look like#and not having the women be physically attracted to them#another contrast point with sayers actually#who is perfectly prepared to have harriet be physically attracted to peter
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josephtrohman · 2 years ago
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[wakes up in a cold sweat] 6.3 INCHES SOFT!!!!!! 6.3 INCHES SOFT!!!!!!!!!!!!
(inspired by that time joe wore a phd shirt)
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bunnihearted · 5 months ago
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🌷🕸️
#i've been thinking about this quite a lot on and off for a while#but to try to process it more i just wanna try to vent:#my sexuality is very messy. even inside my head. so scary. so complicated...?? so just thoughts of it are scary#and like there has only ever been one person who like just thinking about sex with has felt like good#not scary or terrifying. not with all of my avpd symptoms woven in (like one is that idk if i could ever have sex w someone#like actually be with them and be able to look them in the eyes and then also keep talking to them afterwards and not just run away and#never see them again. that's just one thing and this isnt abt that so anyway#like yeah just thinking about sex w him feel ok. safe and comfortable. and enjoyable and like i can and want it#which is smth like... with my other crushes before i've fantasized abt having sex w them but it felt bad and scary ://#and like i didnt actually want sex w them...#and with this person that isnt there. it's scary in a way since like im not experienced at all and idk how it feels irl 💀#but not in the way i usually feel abt it!!!!#so this just in my head#plus the fact that like talking and expressing some of my thoughts TO him ... felt good and safe and comfortable#is actually such a gift from him.... and i'll always treasure this (one of many things haha ^^)#bc he made me experience this and that i can feel good and ok and safe about it#i do feel sad that when this was current i was so cautious and shy bc it was so new to me#i was feeling smth real and genuine emotionally w him and i wasnt just saying stuff ... if that makes sense lmao#hmmm... yeah i've never felt good abt it before that w him. so it was so so new. and i couldnt quite get used to it fast#now im getting messy in my thoughts again sksksk#i just feel like this meant so much to me to just have had it#and idk im just so happy to know that these feelings are possible for me .. and i feel thankful for him that he gave me this not so little#thing/feeling/experience#now... the thing is... he is the only one i've felt all of the things with. like attraction/safe/comfortable/taken seriously etc etc.... so#umm what do i do now? 💀#ig either way im glad i know that this exists for me and that im not incapable of it. even if my avpd makes me feel that way#ok.. skurr skurr?#but yeah sexuality is so fkn scary for me idk it just gets too much i wanna cry T-T
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basu-shokikita · 1 year ago
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maybe i have not seen the content people complain about but when i see talks about the fandom infantilizing toki i'm confused cause like...didn't canon start that...with every passing season toki become more and more child-like until age regression was essentially confirmed in aotd...
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