#not letting any kind of feedback affect his way of doing things sounds refreshing <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[hyunpic]

[jkbabiey]

Feedback: Hi, Im so sorry that I’m late. I really wanted to let you know that my reading was so great and extremely detailed. I know you’re putting so much time and energy into these readings. So, thank you so much for that. I really enjoyed reading mine♥️, as well as the ones you did for others.

Appearance: I’m not really shocked to hear that the person won’t really be my type, because I have a hard time even knowing what I’m attracted to. I can’t really find someone physically attractive until I know that they are kind. So I don’t really put to much into appearance. Especially because we don’t get to pick it, and we are judged extremely hard on things we can’t change. So, how he looks sounds lovely as long as he’s happy. Also thanks for including the gift at the bottom. It looks like anime, I always find gifs from there interesting and aesthetically pleasing, but I’ve never seen any of the shows. But I see so many people enjoy it.

Personality: I’m happy that he’s a very happy/optimistic person. I always try to be positive and I like to be around people who are the same. I like that he’s ambitious because I think that’s very important in order to accomplish goals. It’s funny that you say that he doesn’t like surprises and likes to be in control. Because I’m the same way. I guess we’ll understand each other. Even though I’m a spiritual person I respect that he’s not. I believe that everyone has their own beliefs and shouldn’t be shamed for it, or convinced to change. Also it’s good that he likes to work with his hands because I’m not that handy.

Career: Him being a therapist/someone that helps people with their thoughts is really inspiring. I hope it’s something that he loves and makes him feel fulfilled. I think that this job making him not impulsive is a great trait to have as well as self control and being to deal with emotions. These are things that I work on daily in order to be a better communicator and friend/person. So I hope we can take these skills and use them to have a healthy peaceful relationship.

Communication Style: Thank you for going into detail about the voice. You are so talented. I’ll try to remember that his style of talking can come off condescending and I’ll try not to take it personal, or if it makes me uncomfortable I’ll acknowledge it , and try to work on it with him.

Love Language: I like that his love language is different than mine. Because I’m still trying to work through being able to refracts of service without feeling guilty/rejecting it. And I would hate to make him feel unappreciated. So him liking quality time is perfect. I like spending time with people I love even if we aren’t saying anything and the presence is felt. I like that’ll he’ll show his love in a spontaneous way. I’m not really spontaneous so that’ll be new for me. I’m also the type of person that keeps my feelings private. Also I’ve always said I wanted to date someone that wanted to take random night drives and get fast food and just enjoy each other’s company. I like that I’ll eventually get to see how intense his love is. I also think that him having physical touch as one of his love languages will be something new for me, but I think it’ll help me get out of my shell and learn how to show/be comfortable with affection.

I definitely liked my reading <3. Thank you so much again !!!!! And congratulations on your 1,000 followers ♥️💐. I wish you an abundance of success and happiness!!!!

omg you have such a gentle aura to you. i love you so much. 🥹🥹

i agreed with every single thing you said!! And the way you approach the physical appearance topic is so pure and profound. Thank you for being such a genuine human being and for this supper detailed feedback!! It’s a real struggle because a lot of people i do readings for never give any feedback, so it really refreshing to have you giving me feedback on every single topic i talked about in the reading! Thank you so much! I’m really glad you liked the reading!!! 💜💜

[nctinfo]

[TRANS] Johnny & Jaehyun’s interview with W Korea May 2020 issue!

Today was a day where we borrowed the cinematic imagination of the 1996 film <Romeo and Juliet" directed by Baz Luhrmann and created two Romeos. Both of you portrayed the 'Modern Day Romeo' well, how did you think the shooting went? Johnny: It felt like we came out to play. The setting too, it felt just like any small town in America. When I was leaning against the bed during the shoot, I danced excitedly while holding a bunch of grapes (laughs). Romeo, I think, is someone who is honest with his feelings and who wants to achieve love till the end. Thanks to this, regardless of what others might think, I had fun during the shoot. Jaehyun: From the Hawaiian shirts with palm trees to leopard print belts. Above all, the outfits were bold. The point of today was to act like someone who plays around and has always worn this kind of style. There was a scene [in the movie] where Romeo flips over the white blankets and plays around with Juliet, but it wasn't easy [to portray that scene] because of the blood that rushed to my face (laughs).

It’s a shame we don’t have a Juliet today. If you were to summon Juliet right now, what outfit would she appear in? And what do you imagine would be the first thing she says? Johnny: A simple outfit would be nice. For today’s shoot I was wearing a white short sleeved t-shirt and cream coloured jeans, so Juliet would have a similar vibe and would say ‘Are you doing well?’ filled with affection and excitement. Jaehyun: She’d appear in a white t-shirt and blue jeans. With a short ‘I missed you’.

There are two male leads in the movie <Romeo and Juliet>. There is Romeo who is a romanticist with rich emotions but who is hesitant in front of love, and there is Tybalt who is a calm strategist but sometimes emits fiery charms like a bulldozer. Between the two, who do you feel like you're similar to? Johnny: I think I'm similar to Tybalt who wants to be like Romeo. I'm the type of person to carry out something immediately when you decide on it. On the other hand, I want to learn from Romeo's attitude to be faithful and honest with your feelings the moment you fall in love. Jaehyun: I'm the opposite of Johnny. I think I'm Romeo who wants to resemble Tybalt's calm and analytical side. Normally, I'm the type to follow my feelings rather than reasoning, so if I had to choose between the two, it would be Romeo.

If some day your story gets made into a movie, what song would you want to be played in the ending credits? Johnny: On bright sunny days like lately the mood is refreshed and tender. If the movie will be about me in spring, then Mac Miller’s ‘Circles’ would be nice. If I ever get to make a movie in the future, any Coldplay song would be good. Coldplay’s music feels like home, music genres come and go, but in the end when I need stability I always seem to turn to Coldplay. Jaehyun: In my own movie, first of all I don’t think we need a post credit scene (laugh). I’ve always cherished Chet Baker’s ‘I fall in love too easily’. It’s a tasty song that you can listen to on repeat with an empty head, without thinking anything. Chet Baker’s trumpet performance and voice always strangely draw my ears in.

The title song 'Kick It' of your 2nd full album <NCT#127 Neo Zone> that was released in March actively incorporates the identity of cine kids hero, Bruce Lee. Taking over Bruce Lee's baton, is there a movie protagonist who you want to express musically? Johnny: Exactly two people come to mind. First, Brad Pitt from the movie <Fight Club>, I want to try a song with a strong beat with a fighter's unique fiery temperament. It would be great to incorporate the shocking twist of the movie. The other is Will Smith in the movie <The Pursuit of Happiness>. It's a 'life' movie I want to give five stars. No matter what twists and turns, it's a movie that eventually ends with a happy ending. It would be nice to sing [a song] with a message that even though it's hard now, you'll be happy in the end. A slow ballad would suit that, right? Jaehyun: Even though I acted as him today, Romeo would be fun [to express]. It would be a song that shouts love, but it would be perfect if it contains everything from joy, anger, sorrow, and pleasure like in the movie. When I think of James Dean in the movie <Rebel Without a Cause> I imagine music that puts together spicey funky beats based on the old sounds of jazz bands. Recently I'm really into jazz, soul, and R&B, so a band sound is essential.

Even if it's not someone who everyone knows like Bruce Lee, is there someone you two consider to be a hero? Johnny: I don't really express it well normally, but my mom? I'm an only child that was born late, so I always stuck to my mother when I was young. Looking back, I think my mother was a person who sacrificed herself to her family but still valued her happiness. I want to resemble the way she always lives consciously while having fun. It was my mother who taught me how to feel and enjoy every moment. My mom often told me that the experience of 'trying' something is important. For example, I spent my childhood in the United States, and no matter what, we always celebrated the independence day, which is on July 4th, with family and watched the fireworks. On days when the moon was bright and full, we'd be outside watching it. Thanks to this, I think I've grown up as a person with rich emotions. Jaehyun: my grandmother. Despite nearing 80 years old, she had been a dancer until recently and is now retired. She doesn't miss the broadcasts I appear on and watches everything, and after the broadcast ends, she will always send me long KakaoTalk messages with feedback. Because she's a dancer, there are times when she points out my fingertips and neckline but in general, she tells me what kind of mindset I should have when it comes to life. I always get advice from teachers and people around me, but strangely, every word from my grandmother seems to really pierce me. [She tells me] Don't mind others, live enjoying everything you can take on. I still hold [those words] close to me.

It's been quite a while since the first stage you did in the name of NCT 127. What was the driving force behind you during this long time? Johnny: fans, members, family. Looking back, it seems like it was people that led me. Fans are the 'reason' for me to do something. The members are my companions who walk together for this reason, and wouldn't my family be my roots. Having a place to go back to is a completely different story. I think it's family that shows me that I can fall sometimes and that I have somewhere to go back to. Jaehyun: I was able to endure my trainee days purely because I liked music. It's the same now. Of course, our fans who like our music and who come and watch our stages are a great strength too. One difference is that, until now, I relied on the people around me and tried to lean my body on the 'crew', but I seem to have found a driving force within myself recently. I give myself strength by pushing myself or complimenting myself, that's how I find enlightenment within myself. In this sense, as a human, I feel like I'm going through a time of maturity.

If you could go back in time, what would you tell yourself if you could pat yourself on the back right before going up on the stage for the first time? Johnny: ‘Have confidence. Even if your spirits fall, work on everything’. I don’t know how it might have looked on the outside but my state of mind now seems to be very different from then. I’m much more free now. I kept telling myself that I’m nice and confident, and now I think I am able to stand confident like this. I don’t know why I only saw the flaws in the past. Now, rather than trying to make up for my weaknesses, I tend to focus on maximising my strengths instead. Jaehyun: ‘Do what you want, what you think is right and what you like. Of course I know you’ll do fine, but it would be nice to be a bit more daring.’

What are 3 adjectives that describe you? Johnny: Energetic, romantic, selfish. The last word I chose because I think in order to make another person happy, I need to be happy myself and only when I have a sense of security I can care for other people. Jaehyun: I like classic stuff so first of all, classic, continuous because I always try to learn and grow, and firm in terms of trying to remain as stable as possible.

What were you born with, and on the other hand what weren’t you born with that you’re trying to achieve? Johnny: Seems like I was born with curiosity. Like I’ve mentioned before, my mom has influenced me a lot. On the other hand I want to make passion my thing. Sometimes I look at the members when I’m lazing around. Everyone has their ‘one passion’! Jaehyun: Ever since I was little I would always fix the TV at home whenever it broke down. I think I’ve been born with dexterity. I seem to be good at sports, but I really need flexibility (laugh). I also want to break up with my short lived resolve. To speak, I lack persistence a little. When I really like something or if I have a clear reason to do it, my body moves. If there’s neither, I fall into the swamp of one short lived resolve to another. (laugh)

As a listener of <NCTs Night Night>, a show that was hosted by the two of you in the past, I think you were compassionate and were counselors who had shown more empathy than other people of your age. Today, let's write the concerns of you two. What's your biggest concern now after passing April 12th, 2020? Johnny: Although it's a little embarrassing to say it in words, my biggest concern these days is how to be a strength for the fans who we can't meet because of the recent situation. Most importantly, I don't want to be distressed and spend this time more meaningful. Jaehyun: What the heck to do at home! I'm the type to be very active. Nobody can go outside so I'm working hard in trying to find something I can do home alone. I've watched movies, listened to music and cooked, but I can't help but still feel the itch [to do something].

When you watch your web variety show <NCT LIFE>, you two are often seen standing in the kitchen. Is there any dish you want to make for that one precious person in the future? I wonder what the specific recipe is and what the mood of the day will be like. Johnny: First of all, I wanna make breakfast. Omelets are good to eat in the morning. Omelets are well made when you think 'even though it's bad, it's good'! Stir-fry onions and bell peppers until they become sweet, then sprinkle some pepper to finish it. The time would be good at 09:30 am when the sunlight is strong enough to see the dust. That precious one would be sitting in a chair (laughs). The table will be set with cutlery and two cups of coffee. So that you can open the morning in a relaxed and simple manner. Jaehyun: Samgyetang and stir-fried pork, is that too native? (laughs) If I had to choose one, I will pick the stir-fried pork that was also complimented on <NCT LIFE>. Sometimes only red pepper paste or red pepper powder is used for the sauce, but I tend to use both. It would be great if there was a pretty plate with fruit too, it's the perfect dessert.

Even if it’s not a cooking moment, what’s the time, place, thing or person that makes you the most gentle? Johnny: From noon to 2pm. I feel the most peaceful when the sun is shining at that time. I don’t really care about the place. As for a thing, a scented candle that I have received as a gift while filming <NCT LIFE> in Thailand. For people, anyone! Jaehyun: Late night nearing the dawn. I really like watching the night view. I think the Han River could make me the most gentle. Personal things like earphones or speakers. Being together with family would be nice.

As a person and as a musician, what time do you think you’re going through? Johnny: I always feel like I'm at the starting line. Even when I do the same thing, I have to have a new mindset in order to grow. Jaehyun: It’s a slow process for humans but I seem to be slowly becoming more mature. As a musician, when the time comes I’ll be looking from a distance thinking I’m making ‘my own’ thing.

Translation: Alex, Esmee @ FY! NCT (NCTINFO) | Source: W Korea Scans — Do not repost or take out without our permission!

[mortedeveles]

A Letter To My Love.

P1: Chaotic Interviews.  ALTML MASTERLIST. 

Copyright © 2020-2021 by Veles.

NOTE: PLEASE READ THE NOTES IN THE MASTERLIST ! 

SUMMARY: Tamaki Amajiki, also known as the Pro Hero Suneater, has been your friends for years. You’ve known each other since U.A. During his entire life, Tamaki has fought against his internal demons, insecurities, and voices that rage in his mind. With the help of his friends Nejire and Mirio and you, he was able to overcome his fears and become one of the most successful Pro Heroes in Japan. 

In the last few years, writing has become an outlet for Tamaki when he feels troubled. And being a Pro Hero comes with great luggage- including hyper fans and their strange romantic theories. One of them being 'TamaY/N', a romantic ship created by his fans. As an anonymous writer, Amajiki can finally express the love and affection he's harbored for Y/N for several years through fanfiction when he has spare time. But when Y/N discovers the infamous fanfiction after an awkward interview, drama, heartbreak, and confusion are bound to break loose.

PAIRING: ProHero! Tamaki Amajiki x Fem!ProHero!reader

THEMES: pining, fluff, angst, etc. [SERIES]

TW: cursing, sexual innuendos, mature themes. 

a/n: my requests are open for business lovelies! i proofread this but if i made any mistakes, please let me know! as always, please leave a like, reblog, follow and/or comment if you enjoyed! i appreciate the support and feedback <3 

''His heart sings in joy in her presence. Around her, he's blessed with a sudden warmth that soothes his bones and washes over all the tension and strain in his muscles.'' 

                                                         _______

''Good morning!'' you greet hurriedly to all the workers you leave behind as you race towards the third floor.

Shit, shit, shit! You had an interview with an important press with Tamaki today and it was about to start in three minutes! Luckily, you'd managed to make it to Tamaki's agency on time, but you were yet to arrive at the designated floor. Once you reached the elevator, you let out a sigh of relief. It was empty and while you waited for the elevator to open, you began to pat and smooth over your Pro Hero costume.

It consisted of a sleeveless loose black top with a pair of black shorts, with silver armor that started from your shoulders up to your elbows, paired with black combat boots and silver gloves with some metal and gadgets that allowed you to improve the use of your quirk Liquify.

Before you knew it, the elevator dinged open and you quickly stepped out, plastering a bright smile on your face. The third floor had been emptied- and the equipment from the press stood in the middle- two elegant chairs, cameras and lights, and a few dozen reporters mingling. At the back of the floor, you noticed Tamaki, wearing his Pro hero suit. He was facing the wall- he tended to do when he was nervous.

''Good morning!" you greeted the reporters, who smiled in response. ''I apologize for my tardiness.''

''It's okay. It's a pleasure to meet you, Pro Hero Unda,'' a busy looking woman approached you. She glanced towards Tamaki. ''Do you think you could get Suneater ready for the interview?''

You shoved down a stressed sigh and nodded. ''I'll get him right away!" with one last smile, you stepped away and approached the nervous blue-haired man.

''Tama,'' you spoke in a soft voice and pressed a hand on his shoulder. He was slightly trembling and was muttering something along the lines of 'I want to go home.'

''Y/N,'' his voice was trembling. ''You're late.''

''Ma'am?'' you called out to the lady that had approached you earlier. ''We're ready.''

You sighed and pinched your nose. ''I know, Tama,'' your heart felt heavy. ''I'm really sorry. I was busy doing paperwork and time flew by. Can you forgive me?''

He nodded and turned around and you nearly jumped with joy. The two of you approached the press and sat down on the chairs.

All of the workers quickly surrounded you and you clenched your fists on your lap. Now that they were all crowded around you, it felt like all of them were studying you, nitpicking and silently judging you in their eyes.

You glanced towards Tamaki. It wasn't a surprise that he looked like he felt the same as you. Offering him a small smile, you squeezed his shoulder comfortingly. He offered you a weak smile.

''Good morning, Japan! This is your favorite reporter, Hirano Chizue! I'm live with our two favorite Pro-Heroes, Suneater and Unda!" the smile on her face was so dazzling you were sure it was fake.

''Alright! Let's get started!'' the businesswoman clapped her hands and sat down on the seat in front of you. ''Camera crew, get in position! We're live in 1..2...3!''

You heard several workers move behind you-most likely the ones with cameras and the lady in front of you held a microphone as she smiled towards the camera.

''How are you two doing this morning?'' She pointed the microphone towards both of you.

''Fine, thank you,'' you smiled softly. Tamaki swallowed and raised his gaze towards the businesswoman.

''I'm feeling okay, thank you for asking,'' his voice was somewhat low but at least he replied.

''Good, good!'' Hirano said. She pulled out a clipboard with a neat stack of papers.

''We're honored that you accepted to the interview. Do you mind if we start? The questions are fan-submitted and others are from our crew! Since the two of you are new rising heroes, Japan is eager to know the two of you!'' 

You didn't notice how Tamaki froze at the word 'fan'. You were barely a few minutes into the interview and you already felt exhausted. Nevertheless, you smiled and nodded. 

''Not at all. Ask away.''

Hirano grinned- you didn't miss the hungry glint in her eyes- what type of questions had she chosen?

''This question is for Suneater!'' she shot him a brief smile before trailing her eyes on the paper. Hirano's smile grew.

''What's your relationship with Unda? Are the two of you dating?''

You coughed awkwardly, averting your gaze towards the floor.

''N-no,'' your friend sounded nervous. ''We're good friends, that's all.'' 

When Tamaki said the word 'friends', you couldn't stop the painful ache that throbbed in your chest. You knew that he meant well but you had hoped for years that one day, the two of you would be more than just friends. Clearly, today wasn't that day.

Hirano hummed in response, but she didn't seem convinced. 

''The two of you have a beautiful friendship,'' she complimented. The two of you muttered a 'thank you'.  Hirano's beady eyes focused on you. 

''This question is for Unda! Tell me, your fans are dying to know more about your quirk! Could you give us a brief explanation of your quirk, Liquify?''

A good question, you thought with a smile. Even though it was modern times, the oppression of women and misogyny hadn't been fully eradicated- and it showed during Pro Hero interviews, asking women nothing but shallow questions while the men received interesting ones. Her question was quite refreshing. 

''Of course!" this time, your smile was more genuine. ''So, my quirk Liquify focuses on the state of matter of an inanimate object. I can turn any inanimate object- it doesn't work on plants or animals- into liquid and bend it to my will! I can also return the material into its original state, but I can change its figure and volume,'' you waved your hands as you explained.

''That's a marvelous quirk! Would you mind giving us a demonstration?'' 

''That was an excellent demonstration, Unda!'' you shot Tamaki a glance. He was staring at the ground but when you glanced towards him, he met your eyes and smiled. You smiled back.

With a nod of agreement, you rose and grabbed the closest thing- an empty mug and wrapped your hand around it. When you opened your palm, the once red mug was now a red liquid hovering about your palm, sloshing side to side.

The press gasped in amazement and applauded. You smiled gratefully and returned to your seat.

''Thank you, miss.''

''Now,'' she flipped a page. ''Ooh. This is another question for you, Unda. It's quite a juicy question,'' Hirano bit her lip and grinned. 

''Have you ever read books about TamaY/N?''

Next to you, Tamaki flinched in his seat and coughed lowly. No one seemed to notice, the attention was on you.

You furrowed your eyebrows and shook your head. 

''I'm sorry, is it a book? What's TamaY/N? I haven't heard of it before...'' you trailed off and glanced at Tamaki, hoping for some kind of help, but he wouldn't meet your gaze. You noticed that the tip of his pointed ears was turning red. Was he feeling okay?

Hirano cackled and shook her head. ''No, TamaY/N is the ship name for Tamaki and you. The fans seem to like seeing the two of you together. It's called fanfiction.''

''Oh...'' you said, feeling clueless. Once the information sunk in, you felt your cheeks bloom with warmth. ''Oh.''

''Oh indeed,'' Hirano agreed. ''It's quite scandalous, you should read some on your own! You'd understand what I'm talking a-,''

''Oh, um, well...'' you nervously played with your fingers.

''Isn't this a professional interview?'' Tamaki snapped. His voice was loud and firm and Hirano flinched in her seat.

''I appreciate the support of fans but we are Pro Heroes and have a right to main-maintain our privacy. The status of our romantic experiences is private and will remain that way.'' 

You nodded in agreement, remaining silent as you had nothing else to add. Hirano looked surprised- she cleared her throat and quickly recollected herself with a smile.

''My sincerest apologies, Suneater, we didn't know you felt like this about your... relationship status. Here, let me find another question for Unda...''

The interview continued for half an hour- but the tension was much more tense and awkward than before. Tamaki gave short and clipped answers.

After the interview, Hirano quietly thanked you for your time and the press quickly left. After an hour, the only ones left were Tamaki and you. He was sitting in the corner of the room. He didn't look particularly nervous but the scowl on his face made you frown with worry. 

Slowly, you approached him and sat down next to him. You spent a few minutes in silence before speaking up.

''Are you okay, Tama?''

You shook your head. ''It's okay. If you want to keep those inquires private, that's perfectly fine. And to be fair, it's better that way. The press feeds on any source or evidence of romance in the Pro Hero industry.''

Tamaki was silent. You noticed how he clenched his fists and lowered his head.

''I'm sorry,'' he mumbled. His shoulders slumped. ''I was being very rude and distant...''

Tamaki smiled at you- but the look in his eyes was distant.

''Yeah...''

                               ━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

After the exhausting interview, Tamaki and you had worked for hours in his agency- racing outside to save civilians, filing paperwork, until it was eight o'clock- his agency would be closing early today. The two of you walked towards Mirio's department- he said a celebration was necessary. 

''Helloo!'' Mirio yelled loudly. You laughed as he grabbed Tamaki and you into a tight bear hug, squeezing the air out of your lungs. Even though he wasn't a Pro Hero, he was immensely strong.

''I saw the interview!"' Nejire popped up behind the blonde. ''It's your first interview, I think we should celebrate!" 

''Congrats, Tama and Y/N!'' Eri said and joined the bear hug, along with Nejire.

''I-I can't breathe!" you complained and Tamaki groaned in agreement. Nejire and Eri giggled in amusement as the hug feel apart and everyone stepped back. Mirio jogged towards the dining table and brought a tray with four bowls with delicious takoyaki.

''I think we should celebrate with takoyaki. I've put on a movie that I think everyone will enjoy. Dig in!'' 

Immediately, Tamaki snatched the bowl and raced towards the sofa. You laughed in amusement and followed, holding your bowl of takoyaki.

You spent the rest of the night huddled next to Tamaki and Eri on the small sofa, eating takoyaki. Maybe it wasn't a fancy or expensive celebration, but you wouldn't trade anything in the world for moments like these- lively nights with your best friends. All previous thoughts of the awkward interview and whatever that lady had mentioned washed away, only to be brought back tomorrow. 

a/n: well!! this is my first time writing for my baby tamaki!! what do you guys think? should i make a tag list for this series? dm me if you’re interested! xx 

[cenedrariva]

3, 10, and 4 for writers' ask?

3. What is that one scene that you’ve always wanted to write but can’t be arsed to write all of the set-up and context it would need? (consider this permission to write it and/or share it anyway)

listen i have so many wips and fic outlines that i probably won’t get to before everyone moves on from this fandom, i swear! there’s at least 12 just in cql/mdzs fandom, and dozens and dozens from all my previous fandoms, it gets so bad i have to offload them to other people as prompts sometimes because like the story needs to be out there somehow!

i suppose, have this one scene in my head

so, XY and WWX as best friends and street delinquents getting drunk together and lamenting the fact that they both have crushes on super noble good guys dressed in white, like why them!? They’re so shiny and pure!

meanwhile in a distant room, LXC is listening to XXC talk about his crush on this kinda shady guy dressed in black, he’s cute and has such a good sense of humour! But poor LXC is inwardly a little stressed because this sounds exactly like the guy LWJ was talking about the other day. Oh no, what if XXC and LWJ have a crush on the same terrible guy?!

4. Share a sentence or paragraph from your writing that you’re really proud of (explain why, if you like)

This is a hard one, I’ve written so much its hard to remember specific sentences or paragraphs.

i like this bit, it really conveys the kind of scary intensity of XY’s affection as well as the way he can’t really express it without some kind of violent imagery

Dàozhǎng let Xuē Yáng play with his hair. Xuē Yáng ran his fingers through the silky black locks, teasing them loose from the ties.

“Xiǎo Xīngchén, pass me the comb,” Xuē Yáng said, and even though he couldn’t see it, he could feel Xīngchén’s smile. He was so lovely. Xuē Yáng wanted to bury his face in Xiǎo Xīngchén’s hair. He wanted to climb into Xīngchén’s arms and drown in his scent. He wanted to crack Xīngchén’s ribs open and crawl inside his chest and live inside him and forget the rest of the world existed. Let Xiǎo Xīngchén’s heartbeat be the day and the night, let the pulse of his qi be the air in Xuē Yáng’s lungs, let Xīngchén’s laughter be the water on his lips.

10. How would you describe your writing process?

my writing process involves a lot of daydreaming and thinking about writing, repeating sentences in my head over and over. I’ll think intensely about a scene or arc for about 3 days without writing a word, and then i’ll sit down and get out like 8k.

sometimes, i’ll act out particular scene details, like what kind of stuff you can see lying on the floor, or pacing around as you rant, or i’ll try to daydream about the exact physical sensations a particular emotion might give. sometimes it can get a little exhausting or upsetting, especially when i’m writing things like panic attacks

i try to get in character as i write, to get their internal voices sounding right instead of just like myself. getting in character usually involves refreshing myself on the backstory of the character, and referring to their 3 key traits, which i have in their character notes. but i’m also part of a discord server that chats about xy all the time and that helps keep in character too

for a longfic like Red Azalea, i start off with the basic concept, in this case a slow progression XY redemption story with a romance, and then I’ll outline some of the basic plot points I want to cover. some are like goalposts, some are relationship milestones. this is all the broad concept stuff, like

xy saves xxc

xy travels solo, xxc travels with sl and aq

xy and xxc meet up occasionally so xy can get moral guidance and praise

eventually sl and aq grow to like xy more, found family happens

happy ending

after that, i’ll start making a more detailed outline, usually with ideas for specific scenes, what emotions everyone should be feeling, what their thoughts about each other are, and also where in the timeline we are. there are also notes to myself about stuff to look up. right now, Red Azalea’s notes and outline are about 40k long.

finally, i sit down and write the actual scenes! right now i’m writing them largely in chronological order so i can post them each week, but i frequently refer back to my notes file to make sure the plot is on track and the emotional relationship arcs are working. Once i finish a chapter, i send it to my beta @giraffeter and she looks over it and gives me feedback.

then i ignore the chapter for a week or two until its nearly time to post, then reread it to check its working. the time left ignoring it helps make any mistakes or weird bits easier to spot. i do final edits on tuesday, and then post!

Thanks for the asks!!!

[walkerismychoice]

Sticky Situation (Damien X MC)

Book: Perfect Match

Rating: Somewhere between PG/PG-13 I Don’t really know

Word Count: 1640

Author’s Note: This part 3 in the series chronicling my head-cannon of Damien and MC’s relationship up to present day, explaining why they have never been more than friends. I am loving the re-blogs, feedback, and comments I have gotten on the first two parts so far, so please keep it coming. Part 1 and 2 are linked below.

Part 1: For Safety | Part 2: Man of the Hour

Almost a week had passed since the party at Kai and Nadia’s apartment. Damien felt a little sting of disappointment each time he checked his phone and there wasn’t a text from Kai. He didn’t know what he was expecting from a woman in a long-term relationship. It was just that she had been so eager to give him her number, and to get his in return. Maybe she was just trying to be polite, but he thought they had hit it off pretty well and had a lot in common. He could text her, but he was scared of rejection, even just as friends. Maybe he would go the roundabout way and text Nadia. She was fun to be around too but a little less intimidating because there was nothing more than a friend vibe there. He could just ask how she’s been doing since the plea deal was accepted, no big deal… Maybe tomorrow.

=====

“So Nadia, have you heard from Damien at all since the party?” Kai asked expectantly. They didn’t exactly make concrete plans to hang out or anything, but she kind of got the impression Damien wanted to see her again. Odds are, if he hadn’t texted by now, he probably wouldn’t, and this was bumming her out.

“No he hasn’t, were you expecting him to?”

“Well, you told him we should all hang out, and I said the same thing before he left and he seemed into it.”

“I could invite him to our movie night tonight. I am a little tired of being the third wheel with you and Kyle.”

“Oh, are you interested in Damien? I thought you said he wasn’t your type?” Kai felt a twinge of jealousy at the possibility of her cousin dating Damien.

“Don’t worry, I can’t deny that he is hot, but I picture him with someone more… like you. I know you’ve claimed him, even if you can’t have him….yet,” Nadia teased playfully.

Dammit, why did Nadia have to know her so well? “Stop Nadia, the only man I have a ‘claim��� on is Kyle.” Despite what people say, it is possible for guys and girls to be just friends.”

“Okay then, if that’s what you choose to believe, I will definitely be inviting Damien tonight.”

=====

Kai checked her phone and saw a text message notification from Kyle:

Hey Babe, I have to go out with some clients tonight, so I won’t be able to make it.

Kai tried to be understanding. Big law firms were notorious for working their young lawyers to the bone, often expecting them to work 60-80 hours per week. But it seemed like Kyle was cancelling plans more and more often, expecting Kai to come running over when he finally got home around midnight.  Kai felt more like a booty call lately than Kyle’s girlfriend. But she also knew Kyle was close to becoming a junior partner in the firm. Hopefully this dedication would pay off and Kyle would have more control of his career and his schedule in the long run.

“Kyle cancelled on me again. It will just be you, me, and Damien tonight.”

“Looks like, I’m back to being the third wheel again.” Nadia laughed

“Nadia the joke is getting old.”

“All right, I’m done…for now.”

There was a knock on the door. Kai opened it and there was Damien looking softer and more casual than usual in an effortlessly sexy way. Kai really needed to learn to stop being so affected by him. He was carrying two large carryout bags that smelled heavenly. “Hi Damien, come in.”

“Nadia told me you both liked Thai food so I stopped at Bangkok House on the way.”

“What exceptional service! I think we should have you over more often. Did Nadia tell you that was my favorite restaurant?”

“No actually, that is my favorite restaurant too. I guess that’s another thing we have in common.”

“That’s refreshing. Kyle is more of a meat and potatoes guy, so I don’t go there as often as I used to.”

“Speaking of the devil,” quipped Nadia, “Kai just told me that Kyle had to cancel tonight. More food for the rest of us!”

Kai shot Nadia sideways look, She knew Nadia wasn’t Kyle’s biggest fan, but Nadia was hard to please. She was supportive of their relationship most of the time, but every once in a while she would throw in those little jabs, and it bothered Kai.

After dinner they sat down to watch a movie. Nadia hurried and grabbed the loveseat leaving the couch for Kai and Damien. Of course she would, thought Kai as she made sure to move as far to one side as she could. She noticed that Damien did the same. Whether it was because he wanted to make it clear he was only interested in being friends, or that he wanted to respect the fact that Kai was in a relationship, Kai wasn’t sure, but she was grateful either way. She didn’t need any incidental touching making her have feelings.

“What should we watch? How about The Notebook?” Nadia suggested.

“No!” Kai and Damien practically shouted in Unison. Kai was not about to watch a tearjerker romance with Damien right next to her, and apparently Damien felt the same. “Have you seen Orange County?” Kai asked Damien.

“Yes, it is one of my favorite Jack Black movies! Sounds perfect.”

“Okay,” Nadia conceded. “You two win this time, but next time it’s my choice.”

=====

That first movie night had been so much fun that they decided to make it a Friday night ritual, and had kept it up almost a year now. Sometimes they would go out, and other nights they would stay in and relax. Kyle joined a few times, but it became rare that he had a Friday evening free from client obligations. He had even started having more frequent weekend trips, which he assured Kai were necessary to secure the big clients.

Nadia and Damien went on their own dates here and there, but pretty much nothing lasted more than three dates for either of them. Kai was selfishly relieved when these relationships didn’t pan out. She practically felt single with Kyle’s work schedule, and didn’t want to sit home by herself every weekend. And if she was honest with herself, she was jealous any time Damien showed interest in another woman. She was able to bury her feelings and be happy being friends most of the time. But any time another woman came in the picture, Kai was reminded the feelings were still there.

=====

Damien loved the friendship he had developed with Kai and Nadia. He had been kind of a loner before they came into his life, and they made him realize he actually enjoyed being social with the right people. He buried his romantic feelings for Kai as best he could because she had become such a constant in his life, and he didn’t want to do anything to risk her friendship. She was still with Kyle and made no indication that she would be leaving him any time soon. Every once in a awhile, Kai would say or do something that left Damien wondering if there were mutual feelings, but nothing clear enough to let Damien risk putting his feelings out there.

Damien had never been a fan of Kyle for obvious reasons, but he was trying to trust Kai’s judgement. It was really hard for him to be objective with all things considered. However, as time went on, and Kyle got busier at the office, Damien was noticing a pattern he had seen many times before. He didn’t want to jump to conclusions and tell Kai that Kyle might be cheating, but he was pretty sure Kyle was cheating. He could just investigate it himself, but it was too risky because Kyle knew who he was.

So here Damien was on a Monday evening, waiting at a neighborhood dive bar for his private investigator friend Mike to arrive with some intel.

“Damien! Long time no see!” Damien stood to greet Mike as Mike shook his hand and gave him a clap on the back. “I’m glad I could be of service, but would it kill you to call me every once in a while just to drink beer  and shoot the shit?”

“Sorry Mike, you know I’m a bit of a recluse. It’s nothing personal.”

“Yes, I do know. Which leads me to question, how did you get wrapped up in this woman’s personal business? I take it you weren’t asking for a consult because the case was difficult. I just sat outside of this Kyle guy’s apartment for a few hours the last three days and I got plenty of evidence.”

Damien took a look at the photos, and they were clear as day; Kyle was cheating on Kai. In each of the photos, a petite, fair-skinned redhead, opposite of Kai in so many ways, appeared with Kyle. There were several photos of the pair entering and leaving Kyle’s apartment building. In the last set of photos, Kyle and the woman were shown kissing before Kyle sent the woman off in a cab. Even though it was what Damien had expected, it was still shocking to see the proof. He didn’t like the guy, and didn’t think he was right for Kai, but he didn’t want to see Kai get hurt either.

“Wow. There it is. Now I just have to figure out how to tell Kai without devastating her.”

“This woman must mean something special to you Damien. I do not envy the situation you have gotten yourself in, but good luck. Can I convince you to drown your sorrows in a drink before you get to figuring that all out?”

“Thanks Mike, I could use a drink…or maybe 5.”