#not just allowing your companion to suffer; but planning everything so that they can suffer at the hands of others before you lie to them

[fayevalcntine]

I think Daniel jumping to say "he didn't save you" isn't supposed to be taken as absolute fact when Armand DID save him, he just didn't make the grand gesture of saving him in front of the coven when it mattered, at the trial. Armand took out the coffin from the morgue, gave Louis his blood in order to be revived, and gave him the out he needed in order to get out of Paris. But he didn't stand for Louis publicly, and he didn't just sell him and Claudia out. He directed the entire play and played a full hand at getting Claudia killed. There's a world of difference between "being stuck in a corner" to choose between the coven and Louis, and willingly directing them to kidnap, beat up, torture and then humiliate them in front of a live audience.

[dippedinmelancholy]

I’ve heard that DA:I was originally planned for the MC to only be able to be human, so idk if this is intentional or not by the devs.. .

Playing Lavellan, regardless of gender or sexuality, is just so insanely isolating and depressing, especially if you’re someone like me who latched on SUPER hard to the Dalish.

The Dalish elf gets sent to see if the humans can actually work out their problems. If they can give the mages rights, more freedom than they’ve ever known, maybe that means hope for how the Dalish are treated. But then, surprise, the Dalish tries to help a human woman being sacrificed by people who have sworn to protect the good of all, and everything goes to shit.

They’re suddenly at the head of a religion that has spent hundreds (thousands????) of years hunting them, hating them horribly, so much so that one of your first conversations with Josephine she mentions some of the rumors being Dalish making blood sacrifices. You’re “claimed” by this religion, and have no choice but to work with them. No matter what you believe, you cannot escape this. From this moment on, your entire heritage, family, and beliefs will be forgotten. You are carved in history as the history that even the “savage” Dalish can be claimed and saved by Andraste.

This could be endured. It’s horrible and icky, but on its own could be endured. No one has control over how the world perceives.

But nearly every companion either refuses to acknowledge you are Dalish and that matters to you, or they (Looking at you Sera) outright are disgusted by you, and vocalize how much they hate that part of you at every chance they can. Cassandra, though I don’t think she means to, is horrible insulting by asking if there’s not some space for one more god for you, as though they haven’t used “the Maker” to hunt and punish Dalish.

Josephine is the only one who shows softness or understanding.

But you endure. There has to be a reason, and even if there isn’t, you have to protect the world, because if not you then who will? All the while, this budding, horrible fear of what happens after. No Lavellan can be foolish enough to NOT have that fear. When the threat is dealt with, the dust settles, and the humans grow more comfortable and forget how grateful they are to you, what will happen? A Dalish will not be allowed to keep such power, wielding it over humans. Especially not if you has the misfortune of being born a mage.

And then Trespasser. Your gods aren’t gods, and even if they were, they never cared about you. You’ve spent all your life clinging to the pride that even though life as a Dalish is hard, it is worth it because you are FREE. You are not servants or slaves, you are free, and that makes the suffering worth it. But you were never free. You willingly welcomed slave markings, and the world was too shattered for any of your people to ever know the truth of their history.

And though you and your people have prayed to the gods all their lives, it’s no a single one of them that gives you the mercy of this truth. No. It’s the most feared of the gods, the unspoken, the whispered, the cursed. The Dread Wolf. The rebellion of those slave markings, in your midsts, and in my case, in your bed, in your heart.

Your world is shattered. You are dying. Everything is in tatters because you were foolish enough to try and help a human woman, when no human has ever reached a helping hand to you. Yet, the only remaining constant is that you are alone.

You are alone and you are a fool.

[scratchandplaster]

Tales of Arcadia - Lost

A little recapture!AU for your palate. Have you ever wondered what Shepard had planned to happen in the first chapter? Well, the more you know...

CW: stalking, manipulation, kidnapping, noncon drugging

・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

The bass nearly deafened all other noise surrounding them. Horrible, just horrible, Lukas wished they rather had stayed at home. But no. No, Ben practically begged to go out into the screaming masses and work off his little spring fever while electronic beats assaulted Lukas' eardrums from every direction. 

The redhead Ben so desperately tried to impress, surprisingly charmed by this huge klutz of a brother, only laughed sweetly.

Good for him, Lukas thought, and hoped Ben would remember that he was allowed one single drink tonight. 

The last thing I need is-

Someone bumped against his shoulder from behind, nearly throwing Lukas to the ground. As quickly as they appeared, the person was swallowed up by the sea of colorful dancing shapes.

-him getting alcohol poisoning.

Squinting through the flashing lights, his lovestruck brother was visible to everyone as his companion stepped closer to dance, if this spastic twitching could even be called that.

Everything was too loud, too embarrassing - Lukas could only suffer through this farce in short laps. Not a flicker of patience in sight, he quickly gave his roommate's shoulder a few hard slaps, guiding the attention away from this doomed mating dance: "I'm going to get some air."

"Huh?" Avery screamed, too amused or disinterested to care.

Lukas just shrugged and squeezed through the mass towards the exit, suffering unknown skin rubbing against his, letting sweat soak into his clothes. Quickly swallowing down his urge to gag, he finally rushed through the side door, and took in a few gulps of the crisp night air.

Days ago, they had agreed for Ben to try his luck on campus or a local bar, but Avery - who else - brought up the bright idea to drag them to a club in the back of beyond.

The damp touches still clung to him, as did the drums inside his ears. He should have stayed home. No matter how unsuccessful Ben's efforts were tonight, in the future he was free to run around town on his own.

Walking through the parking lot, step by step away from the packed circus, Lukas passed more cars than people. The bushes separating concrete from the short piece of woodland next to the industrial district invited him with the dark peace he needed so badly.

Fingers twisting into each other with painful pressure, he simply hummed, a sound to drown out all others. He rubbed his shirt across every inch touched by others, friction cleansing him from the tacky prickling on his skin. With every step away from the building, breathing came naturally to him again.

The night was cold, and now, Lukas was too.

Great. Thank you, guys. 

How long would it all take? The flirting and the chatting and the groping and whatever else they were here for; his insistence on keeping Avery and Ben apart came back to bite him in the ass.

Nobody was left to blame but himself.

I want to go home. The hum in his throat turned into annoyed hissing. The sooner, the better.

Busy walking circles on the forest floor and holding any remaining warmth inside him, Lukas suddenly felt a jacket drape over his shoulders from behind. He jumped a little, then huffed. Sometimes Avery couldn't help but act like a mother hen, despite his dismissive way.

"I'm fine, you could've stayed inside." 

Silence. Lukas awkwardly hoped that his nagging didn't ruin Avery's mood: "Can we go home soon?"

"If you like to," an all-too familiar voice responded.

The air had shifted in a heartbeat, and with a chill on his skin no longer caused by the temperature, Lukas slowly turned around to meet his visitor. In the shine of a lonely streetlight, his father studied him intently. 

Too close for comfort, yet still a good distance away from being eye to eye...

Lukas stumbled back. In his head, hundreds of questions with no answers in sight merged into an unstoppable maelstrom of dread that threatened to let him freeze up.

Despite the state of shock, Shepard didn't come closer. His son's troubled expression caught him like a slap to the face.

"What are you doing here?" Lukas finally gasped.

"Oh, you know my love for..." The old man squinted at the sign leading lost visitors back to the club, "...electronic dubstep."

No quips could lighten his mood at all, the demand getting even louder: "What do you want?"

"Two years, Luke. After two years, that's the first thing you ask me?"

Ben, that fucking idiot; who else could have brought him here? The older brother cursed himself and everyone around for not being careful enough. All these extra steps I took, and what for?

"You look like you've seen a ghost," Shepard mused, strangely sorrowful, "I only want to talk."

"I have nothing to say." The day for his vindication had arrived, yet any words of defense were caught in the throat of the prodigal son. As if he owed that man anything! 

What he owed himself was quickly realized: taking big steps back to reach the parking lot, Lukas squeezed through rows of cars. The entrance to the club still felt miles away. Avery; he needed to get back inside so Avery could get this whole chaos settled.

"Why?" his father called out behind him and pursued, "Please, tell me why."

"Do you really want to do this right now?" 

"What happened? Did I do something wrong?"

If he did- 

Shock turned into rage quicker than Lukas could have ever expected from himself: "Are you fucking serious, where do I even start?"

"Just start, I'm listening."

"First of all," Lukas whipped around and came to an indignant halt, "you look insane."

He had always hated the creepy farmer look that hid the man who once was the center of his whole world, the specifically procured aesthetic for everyone who had joined them on their homestead.

His father sheepishly peeked down to his jeans and flannel; sure, it had been a rough couple of months, maybe he let himself go a bit more than usual...

All other reasons Lukas had neatly listed in his head bubbled out of him in a fountain set free:

"Second of all, I hate staying with these screwed-up hippies. I hate living on a field, I hate that whole thing you opened up my home to, ripping these idiots off for their last cents."

"Who gets ripped off?" Either he played dumb, or started to buy his own bullshit. No matter which way, Shepard hadn't changed a bit.

"Everyone who sets a foot on there, everyone who buys only one of your words, you fucking liar."

"Language, dear." Shepard watched him mumble and hiss in response, pacing on the spot, and wondered since when his boy had concerns for strangers. "They are happy."

"Exactly," he huffed, "that's the worst thing about it!"

"So how am I ripping them off then?"

Luke kicked a stone against a truck's tire, so hard it ricocheted off to skim a layer of varnish on the unlucky car next to it.

"You loved our remote living. No school, little traffic-"

"Yeah, when I was three years old!" Lukas yelled and threw his hand up in frustration. Like always, he preached common sense to a wall. "I'm not anymore, as you can see and as I've told you many, many times. But somehow you still don't get it, not even right now."

"I'm sorry, Luke, I don't want to argue with you." Shepard looked around and sighed, like he didn't just ask for this thorough lecture, hoping to shift the discussion in a more friendly direction: "How's Ben doing?"

Fantastic. Getting plastered, dancing, ruining the life I built.

"What do I know? I left him with you." Left him because I thought he was safe, you psycho. And if he sees you here, he's not safe anymore. None of us are.

Pensively watching him like Shepard spotted a rare bird in the wild, Lukas realized this back and forth got him nothing but wasted time. His father needed to get off their backs. Fast. 

Despite his gall, Lukas felt powerless: physically he couldn't get very far, he had never been a good runner. And undoubtedly, his father wouldn't take another "No" serious enough and leave it at that for tonight.

Damn it. To slip away from this ghost of the past, to get all three of them home in one piece, to avoid a family discussion in the dark cold, Lukas needed to entertain this poor attempt at reconciliation.

"I don't want to argue with you either," he finally murmured, somehow trying to spin it like it wasn't Shepard alone that drove him away.

"That's good. But if you won't tell me, I need to ask again: Why?"

Why should I have stayed, Luke loved to ask back, but a firm bite on his tongue stopped his spite.

"I just wanted to be on my own. Not with these people."

His father looked like he was near tears: "Then why didn't you tell me?"

"I did, every day. And you. Didn't. Listen!" he spit through clenched teeth.

Not that it mattered. Lukas had a hunch about what happened in his absence, and of everything Ben told, he already heard enough. The three of them were long past family breakfast in the camper, like all those years ago. 

Wrapping the jacket closer around himself - because he was cold, no other reason - he frantically thought of his next move. Maybe Avery had the mercy to come out here soon, or anybody else for that matter. Hidden between the cars, Lukas wished to be back in the crowd, invisible to the man in front of him.

As his father took a step towards him, Lukas flinched back. Hurt flit across Shepard's face, halting him on the spot and silence spread out again, both men unsure of what to say next.

"Would you..." His father's fingers fiddled with a set of car keys, "Can you imagine sitting down with me for a bit? We can go to a café or somewhere that is not a parking lot. And we could talk."

"I'm not going back there."

Time stood still, as did the broken family.

"You didn't change a bit, Lukas. Always so perceptive, I shouldn't be surprised you wanted to be independent sooner or later, hmm?"

His son shrugged wordlessly.

"When you say you never want to see these people again, does that include me?"

Yes, Lukas lied to himself. I don't miss you.

In fact, he missed Dad, the man always by his side and ready to be here for him. The only person who understood why the world as it was often felt too overwhelming for Lukas to live in, a man who never called him difficult, even if he was. 

Nevertheless, he couldn't admit it to himself. So Lukas said nothing.

"I think of you," Shepard confessed, helpless against his son's silent treatment, "every single day."

Biting his quivering lip, Lukas let all his anger and sadness flow together: "You can't just come here and expect me to play along, it messes everything up!"

Would he be furious with Ben? With Avery, even? Anxious thoughts caught up to him, now jittery again and trudging on the spot.

"I'm sorry, Luke," the old man said and took a step back again, "I don't want to scare you. Ever."

This doesn't change anything, get a grip! It's good that I left, it's good that Ben followed.

"I'm not going back," he growled.

To this, his father only nodded, as if slowly digesting his answer. 

"Okay."

"I'm not."

"I understand, it's okay." The gentle tone in his voice resonated with hurt, and this time, Lukas believed him. "I need to know that you're doing well. Are you?"

Shaking in the breeze, grinding his teeth and thinking of the many hours he slaved away his life at the sink of a rundown restaurant, the son couldn't be as truthful as he would like to be: "Yes, I am."

"That's good to hear," Shepard exhaled deeply, like a great burden was lifted from his shoulders, "I'm so glad."

Awkwardly, Lukas rubbed his soles into the asphalt. Shepard took the bait without any problem, but leaving itself was not the only sin he committed during his trip to Atlanta.

"Are you mad?"

Shepard stood much closer now, rows of cars surrounding the pair at all sides. He blinked, then glanced back questioningly.

"Because of the money." Lukas explained, "I don't have it anymore."

The bit of seed capital he took from the collective register; five thousand dollars, to be exact. A missing sum his father surely had to explain to the residents... And still, for the first time in years, Lukas saw his father smile - more amused than happy.

"No, no. Impressed, you could say, I really didn't see that coming."

His son gazed up, the same amber eyes as the old man, framed by Claire's features: "What about Birdie?"

"Oh, you know her. Don't get me started."

Good! I hope that bitch had an aneurysm. 

Lukas' smirk quickly gave way to another beat of silence as he zipped the jacket around his shoulders open and close, still uneasy: "What happens now?"

"I have no idea, Luke," his father sighed somberly, "But maybe you could give me a chance to come back into your life again."

"Well..." Perhaps I can visit you, once a month or so. Lukas quickly shook this thought away. Thank goodness Ben didn't run into him, he would've begged and cried to go back already. "I need some time to think, so if you're planning on staying around here, we could set up a... meeting or whatever. "

Unless he managed to relocate himself and his brother first. Lukas wanted to throw up at the thought of explaining this whole mess to him later, as he carefully handed over the jacket back to its owner, who unlocked the truck behind him and tossed it inside.

What is he thinking anyway, Lukas wondered, driving around town and creeping through the parking lot like a weirdo?

The light from inside the vehicle let him see his father a bit better, and the deep lines of worry carved into his face. He suddenly seemed much older than he was, the beard didn't help much either, yet he wore a small smile on his lips. His old man looked relieved.

If he - by some force of nature - should come back to himself one day, Lukas may rethink his plan. But as long as their peace of mind fell victim to strangers on a meadow, he needed to keep them both away from this life as far as possible.

"I missed you so much," Shepard breathed as he turned back to face him, even closer now, and suddenly pulled him into a gentle hug.

Lukas' muscles tensed up, surprised, but there was no force behind the embrace. It felt nice, being held like that.

I missed you too, Luke thought for a second and rested his forehead against his dad's chest. Why couldn't he act like that all the time? Patient, a bit silly here and there, and attentive like he used to be; like he was most of the time. 

But sometimes, he just-

In a fraction of a second, Shepard's grip tightened around his son. Before Lukas had a chance to register it, he was picked up, spun and pushed onto the passenger's seat of the truck. The impact knocked a silent scream out of his lungs.

What-

Hot flashes of pain surged from his back up to his head, where he took an unlucky fall on the center console. In his confusion, Lukas managed to lift his leg and land a kick against his father's stomach. With a twist of his hand, Shepard swiftly grabbed his ankle and pressed it down onto the seat. Big eyes full of panic gawked up at him.

"You can't-"

A cloth pressed into his face, calculated and determined. Luke tried to scream, but all efforts stayed smothered by the thick fabric.

"Shhh." The hand only held on tighter against his face.

Fumes burned inside his mouth and nose, forcing cough after cough out of his lungs. As if all air was slowly disappearing, Lukas felt his mind freeze up, paralyzed by fear and chaos.

It hurts, was the one thought echoing through him, Dad hurts me.

Haplessly, he tried to stem away from the cushion, to maybe get a leg on the ground and slip out, yet all the twisting and turning only gave him another well-meant shush and more weight pushing down on his body. 

The smothered whines hurt the most, nearly ripping his father's soul in two.

"I know, I know," Shepard whispered into his hair, "it's alright."

Laying flat on his stomach now, Lukas knocked his useless feet against the locked door. Nothing more than a cry for help, he focussed his whole strength on trying to get out of an embrace that only grew firmer with every motion: nails scratching against flannel, an elbow between the ribs. 

All the noise fell on deaf ears. Nobody was coming to help him.

With every kick and scream, Lukas' struggle became less and less coordinated. His dizzy vision made it hard to aim, and despite the scratchy fibers digging into his face, his skin suddenly felt warm, so warm that it felt hard to pull away anymore. 

One blink, and keeping his eyes open became impossibly difficult, like the biggest chore he could manage. Images melted into each other, a kaleidoscope of colors and vertigo.

Another blink, and his tired limbs gave up the fight, leaving him to droop further into the cloth. Only his eyes still fluttered, until even this task became impossible. They shut eventually, long after the last thought got wiped away from his consciousness.

Slow, deep breaths pulled Lukas even further away until he fell asleep, calm and peaceful, in his father's arms.

--------

Inside his mind, Shepard counted. He had to be accurate, for his and Lukas' sake. It kept his thoughts from what he was doing to his son right now, but in extreme situations, a father resorts to extreme measures.

And in refusing to contain his stubbornness, Lukas had left him no choice.

Gradually, the body beneath him grew slack under his weight. After another minute, Shepard carefully pulled the cloth away from his airways when he felt confident enough that the boy wouldn't start throwing another fit.

In the dark, he listened for any unrest outside the truck, any unwanted onlookers. Nothing but the remains of what they counted as music shook through the surrounding metal. Finally, then, Shepard realized it was over.

Lukas was back. Back with him. It was unreal, like a lovely dream come true at last.

His son laid motionless on his side while he held him close, a kiss on the forehead to take away any anxiety left. Checking his breathing and temperature - his skin a bit too cold to the touch for Shepard's liking - the father only marveled at how Lukas looked exactly as he did the evening they last spoke. Nothing had changed, and soon, Shepard knew it would be just like it used to be. Only the two- 

Only the three of them.

A part of him stung from having to leave Reuben behind, yet Shepard had no doubt that he would follow them soon after. He did feel a bit disappointed, though, that Lukas would so blatantly lie to him, but nobody should be surprised by that. There were bad influences all around in this part of town.

"I know it's unfair." A lone tear got wiped off Lukas' cheek. "We'll talk about it later."

Safe and secure again, he positioned him in the passenger seat, buckled in tightly to keep him from slumping over.

With a twist of the key, the engine sprung awake and let ease shake through his chest. His little one would surely be inconsolable when he woke up, but for tonight, the restless void in Shepard's heart had stopped aching.

・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

Thanks for reading 🤍 [Masterlist]

Taglist: @whumpyourdamnpears

[cosmicbucket]

this is by no means an educated and informative post but rather a severe understatement of the rage i feel over the interview regarding one Gale Dekarios.

under the cut is a stronger criticism on the narrative's integrity with this ending; everything before that is tearing into the lead writer's statements.

note that I will be referencing other companions as contrast. this is not supposed to be tearing them down nor casting shade on anyone who enjoys these characters; i am trying to make a point through relevant comparison.

-----------------------------------------------

"the guy who starts off annoying everyone" that is such a blatantly subjective thing to say about a character.

for me personally, i Loathed shadowheart at first because of the immediate fantasy racism towards lae'zel. this is very clearly a subjective opinion as she's the most romanced companion, and I'm not mad about that in the slightest! she rocks! you can't judge a character on behalf of everyone ever. that's a foolish thing to do, full stop.

"constantly asking you to give him your most treasured possessions to eat" three times. he asks you for a magical item, three times. after that you are NEVER required to part with a magical item on his behalf again.

the game practically THROWS magic items at you for completing side quests, looting crates and chests. magic items are in ABUNDANCE and a lot of them won't be useful to your party depending on your companions and your chosen class. meanwhile, astarion's peculiar diet lasts the entire span of the game, creating a situation where should you choose to let him feed on you every night, you suffer a penalty to attack rolls, saving throws and ability checks OR waste a spell slot to remove the condition. astarion is most certainly in no shortage of fans and again! he rocks! but by comparison his effect on the player can stretch so far as to affect the final boss battle. gale's condition doesn't even make it past the end of act 1.

"at the end, he gives himself for the world" is it worth it though. is it really seriously worth it.

you can still defeat the elder brain yourself. it's not impossible. hell, with the right spells it's really fucking easy. are you seriously going to rob yourself of the satisfaction of defeating the final boss by sending someone to their death instead and calling it a day.

I can understand the narrative catharsis of a character who is so selfish, constantly, over and over, doing something selfless for the greater good.

But that just is not what Gale's story is.

Gale is ambitious and boastful, certainly. Gale is not selfish.

His attempt to impress Mystra - The Mother of Magic, Goddess of the Weave - came from a want to be equals with his partner. He explains how she refused to allow him to witness the depths of magic, and while that's a reasonable thing to enforce to a regular mortal, she had made him her Chosen, her lover. I would hope I don't need to delve into the blatant grooming (ie Elminster approaching Gale at the age of eight) and the obvious power imbalance between a goddess and a mortal in a relationship, but his desires - ambitious as they were - were not selfish.

When he asks for the player's assistance, he does so knowing that he's asking a lot from them, especially in terms of trust. While it's easy to see his pushiness for magic items as self-serving, it is quite literally a much larger problem than him. The damage he's capable of "could level a city", and that affects not just your party but the surrounding area for miles. His urgency, his impatience, comes from having to rely on someone else who might not respect the gravity of the situation (which, evidently, a lot of players don't.)

When he realises the magic items are doing nothing to prevent his hunger, he lays it out plainly to the player, apologising for having broken their trust, and gives them the choice to send him away to certain death with no hard feelings. He even explains his plan to find an Absolutist base and hopefully destroy that in order to aid you in his death, should you choose to kick him out. This is in Act 1, way before any massive character developments - that is to say, he is unselfish from the start.

Come Act 2, when Elminster tells Gale that Mystra expects him to detonate the orb to kill the Heart of the Absolute, Gale is immediately willing. He will answer to his goddess' whims without so much as a query. You don't have to convince him to do it - rather, it becomes your choice to convince him not to do it.

And you do have to convince him! You have to actively make the choice, over and over again, to say no, we can find another way. You are not dying today.

Even in Act 3, should you take him through Zethino's Love Test, you are able to call him out for his greatest flaw:

"He thinks he, and the world, might be better off if he were dead."

I am not calling him selfless by any means; he is not a paragon of virtue. He is, however, a character whose hubris (spurred by an abusive relationship with a goddess) is amply punished, so much so that he believes this punishment is entirely deserved. He is a victim of grooming who is told to kill himself in order to gain forgiveness for trying to be equals with his partner, who took advantage of him as a child.

What kind of message is Larian trying to make here? What are they trying to tell their audience? What are they saying to people who relate to Gale?

It's fucking horrible. Do better.

[daemon-in-my-head]

1 and 7 for the new asks 😊

Thank you those are the spiciest ones lmfao. Answering my latest abomination.

1. Your hottest Durgetash take. The kinda heat Gortash had to endure in HoH. (But be respectful about it fellas, this means everyone)

I mean this in the nicest, most respectful way possible, but: the durge story line in game is absolute and utter trash I'm so sorry. The absolute lack of reactions from ur companions, the fact that there's no consequences from them except Wyll and the 2 guys you met literally 5 minutes ago, the sudden shift of tone in Act 3 when Durge remembers who they r and immediately goes 'I'm daddy's lil princess and yall can smd'. It's just infuriating atp. Like I love Durge and I do appreciate the vagueness cuz it allows for a lot of topics to be brought up but none of them r really tackled by a game thats praised for handling trauma in a tactful manner. They're made to be the laughing stock and comedic relief and honestly it's just distasteful when you recall that a lot of ppl with certain types of trauma or addiction issues can so greatly relate to them. There was a lot of dark shit they could've expressed with that origin. And they did. But it was cannibalism and necrophilia for the sake of sensationalism and slapstick comedy.

As for Gort it's the remote work I've talked about b4 lmao. They rly just banished the most powerful political leader of the Gate from the Gate and made him work remotely from a shabby fortress outside of the city he's ruling. I know why they did it, I can understand it, but it's still hilarious and probs a hot take cuz like yk that man wouldn't reside there if it wasn't for the scrapping of the upper city.

7. Would Orins premature death have impacted them and their dynamic? How? Why? Why not?

Okay, so first up, there's smth ya need to know to understand this. Elli had a sister, and even if they weren't blood related he considered his foster family to be his, well, family and loved them. And that man, at least pre tadpole, is pretty much aware of what happened when the urge awakened and how he's the very thing he couldn't protect his treasured people from, despite that being his greatest desire.

So in other words, he's 10000% projecting the sister he's killed onto Orin. He's lenient with her and protective over her. To him, she's the sister he could and will save. She's the last bit of family and treasured people he has left. So if anything were to happen to her, he'd snap. Because that man is utterly traumatised and he simply wouldn't be able to deal with another loss like that, but he's also the type to run away so he'd just become the perfect pretty puppet Bhaal would've always wanted and simply cease to exist as a person, wholly devoting himself to the plan just so he can escape this dreadful hell he's forced to live in ASAP. Which, in turn, would also destroy everything Gortash enjoyed about him. Elli would remove himself to the best of his ability and simply become someone following orders without thinking, smth Gortash enjoys in everyone but his equal, which would cause him to withdraw as well. They'd just kinda get miserable by themselves again, completely terminating whatever was before. Cuz Gort can't see Elli breaking to such a degree thx of his own issues and him being a permanent reminder that Gort himself isn't safe even after everything, and Elli simply has 0 capacity for any sort of attachments left. 'If he's gonna lose them anyway, might as well not forge them in the first place' kinda mindset.

Now, if Gortash somehow had his hands in that, and Elli would find out however... Well, Elli considers death to be a mercy, so Gort would probably live to see his age turn three digits, all while he suffers from the Bhaalspawn's wrath. Seeing all he's ever built crumble and fall for no other reason than the elfs spite and desire to destroy the one who took his sister. Like that man would grind Gort down to the point where Gort would even consider his time in HoH a walk in the park, all while Elli ruins himself as well cuz arguably the second he loses someone else he'd absolutely discard any attachments to life and staying alive too. His motivation to obey Bhaal was the promise of control and protection, and without someone left to protect, he'd have no reason left to make sure Bhaals plans don't go up in flames.

If he hadn't lost his memories Orin would still be alive nd thriving simply cuz Elli couldn't kill her and would instead either protect her or die for her sake, no doubt abt that.

[becausesomething]

Lost to the currents of madness - Gajeel Redfox x Levy McGarden

Sinopse:

How far can love that is born from a disturbed contact go? Can this make or break a relationship? Is it possible to find balance and overcome challenges? All these questions go through the minds of two people who are madly in love with each other. But each person also faces their inner demons.

W.C.: 1.8K

Warnings: agnst, tor!ure with b!ood reference, toxic relationship

The nights were long and lonely, bringing with them the tragic fate he found himself in, but that wasn't what haunted his mind. It was that damn smile until the last breath. The deep, low metallic sound of teeth grinding, in attempts to fall asleep and forget that image, echoed through the confined space. — How much longer do you plan to not talk about the subject that keeps you from sleeping for days on end? — mutters Lily, who transforms and punches the wall. The sound and impact make Gajeel lose his self-control. On impulse, he jumped out of bed, transformed his right arm into a sharp blade that glittered in the reflections of the dim candlelight, and pointed it at Lily's throat. — I'm tired of your comments. It was just another mission. And, if you're that bothered, you have a solution just a few milometers away or look for another place to sleep. If piercing, angry looks could kill, this would be one of those moments. Lily pushes the blade with his left forearm, allowing him to swallow the saliva that was trapped in the tense moment. He still thinks about responding, but it would be in vain, and at that moment he just wanted to have a night in which he could sleep without the constant unconscious iron sounds that his companion made when something bothered him. He returns to his exceed form, takes the pillow and goes to look for another place in those dungeons.

...

His mind was clouded with anger, the desire to see the person in front of him suffer. Not only had she managed to hurt him by using his element against him, but she continued to have a sharp tongue, challenging him with impertinent and harsh responses. — Let go of me, you idiot! I already told you: I apologized and begged for forgiveness, please! It was unintentional, it was alcohol mixed with loneliness, it didn’t mean… He uses the powers to tighten the handcuffs and pull on the metal chain holding Levy by her hands above the head as she struggles to feel the ground beneath her. — Shut up! Your excuses stopped being worth anything the moment I saw it with my own eyes. — He approaches her and grabs the chin, forcing her to face him. — I fought against the darkness I carry it to see you smile, I denied my instincts to not end up seeing you hurt, I allowed you to enter my life even though I received constant lectures and reprimands. — Gajeel — Her voice breaks when saying the name because tears begin to flow, filled with the injustice she felt. — I forgave you, I'm just asking for the same... You're the one I love! Those words made him let go of her chin. Consumed by the pain in his heart and the situation, in response, he punches her in the stomach, which leaves her gasping for air and curling into herself. He turns his back, goes to the wooden table, leans on it and closes his fists on it, breaking it. — I also felt alone, but that's not why I let my needs speak louder. I joined the guild for you, I swore loyalty to the master and that's why I went on the mission to be a spy and return to Phantom Lord. Fuck! I wrote you letters explaining everything, you responded understanding the situation I was in and that you would wait for me. — Cough, cough, I tried to wait for you, cough, cough, cough, I missed you so much. — I realized that seeing you in bed with a stranger, without the slightest warning or respect for everything you've been building for us.

After an intense discussion, when trying to explain the agonizing pain and loneliness she felt, upon discovering that it could be months before getting back together with him, and continue to live the adventure that was that relationship, made her lose all the common sense she had and give herself up ways she never thought of. She had become addicted to the intensity, and for that reason, her thoughts tortured her. She drank, pretending that she felt nothing or that he didn't exist. However, she wasn't the only one who got drunk to the point where the only way to escape that agony was to become numb, as each person fought their own demons.

Levi swallows hard, and rubs her wrists against the cuffs in an attempt to get into a more comfortable position and compose herself. The place where she had received the punch hurt, but she would endure whatever was necessary to redeem herself. — Sorry, but I know we can get through this! After a long sigh, Gajeel regains his broad, aggressive stance and cracks his knuckles as he addresses her. His index finger becomes a scalpel, and, at the slightest contact with the skin on her neck, he tears it, leaving a trail of blood. — If it weren't for your shameful actions and your arrogance in having the nerve to answer me back, you wouldn't have to suffer, I wouldn't have to finish a mission and reveal that in the face of events I made the decision to become a double spy. Her expression gradually changed, starting to show the fear that invaded when saw the person she loved being taken by the shadows. The ones he always fought against, that made him even more powerful when he allowed himself to become intangible. She wanted to believe it was just a punishment, she knew she hadn't acted right, but she also knew that he loved her unconditionally, deeply and madly. However, hope was fading as she saw that dark look and the shadows around his body expand. In a small gesture, she tries to move her hands to activate her solid script, but before any words could come out of her mouth, she is covered by his hand, which still has the nerve to imitate the gesture she always made when he was unable to remain silent. With a cynical smile behind that finger on his lips, Gajeel laughs, already lost to a mental breakdown, at the panic and despair that Levy showed. Taking advantage of the shock, he cuts a piece of metal tape and covers her mouth, preventing her from speaking and only muffled loud sounds were audible.

Making use of his ability, transforming his fingers or arms into pointed and sharp weapons, and awakening his sadistic side, he delivers superficial blows along the length of that small body, focusing on the arms, chest and legs. She resists the pain by suppressing the sounds that the body wanted to release, and heightened by adrenaline. She is unable to take the eyes off what he was doing. It was as if she was under a spell, aware of what was happening but disturbed to see that the person in front of her had given up and swallowed in to the shadows. She couldn't blame him, because that situation was due to her internal and external weakness, letting her fears win. She began to feel the burning of the wounds, the unpleasant sensation of the liquid running down the skin, the distress in the body as she felt the cold of a new blade. A deeper cut on the inside of her thigh makes her scream muffled and create tears that turn into a cry. She wouldn't be able to escape, as she saw the chances of her being able to reach him diminishing. — Gihee, it seems like I really am a bastard, I made you cry.

He acted on instinct; he wanted to see her suffer and relive the despair and fear of the first time they had contact. He needed to move forward and get even more involved in those emotions that aroused when he was in the shadow mode. Passion that turned into resentment; however, the madness of the intensity of words and touches they exchanged invaded the mind, increasing the insanity, and for that very reason he could not control himself. He loved the expressions, no matter what they revealed. The metallic chains, covered in a thick black shadow that extended from his arms, hit her back and torso, as she struggled to escape the agony, which increased with each shock to her already punished and injured skin.

The blows increased before decreasing again, as did her resistance, which was beginning to give in to the exhaustion and ordeal of the suffering. Satisfied with the weakened image, taken over by red and purple, he approaches and removes the metal tape, proceeding to hold it around her neck and lick that metallic taste mixed with salty sweat. Feeling the smell of paper that was so characteristic diminish, as well as the heavy and laborious breathing, the irregular beats. In response to that touch, the mind, fainted by pain, awakens; her body goes rigid and gaze meets his. She saw a black even deeper than the aura he was surrounded by. At her limit, she had to try one last time; it was her responsibility to save him, once again. And she knew that loves as exaggerated as theirs could lead to delight or misfortune, but were always rewarding to live or die. — Stupid Gajeel, thank you for making me happy while it lasted. I'm sorry I was so weak. Completely surprised by those words, he lets his guard down and lets go of her body. Using that swing, she wraps a leg around his waist and seals their lips in a wet kiss, full of insanity and in need of goodbye. He reciprocates, holding her by the waist and drowning his fingers in her unruly blue hair. — Levy, only you can drive me to the insanity of loving so violently. Letting go of her, he takes the hand away from her hair, and the black ribbon she wore in her hair falls to the floor. She smiles sweetly at him, before closing her eyes and losing strength to a tired body.

Without looking back, he heads towards the guesthouse where Lily was waiting for him. — Get your things, we have a new urgent mission from Makarov in the country of Disierto. — But just now we’re back in Magnólia… — We are the shadows of dice cast in this factious world. — He receives a look of confusion, which responds with a punch on the wall. — If you want to face the master's fury, it's up to you. Gajeel picks up the few belongings scattered on the bed, pushing them into his backpack, putting it on his shoulder and leaves that room, slamming the door. And closing in on himself, his biggest regret: having let himself fall in love with someone who weakened all his walls, driving him to the madness of torturous love.

Find more stories here and here xoxo

english is not my first language, even thought I use it more than my native tongue. I try my best to adapt it 🫣

[ironwoodprotectionsquad]

It seriously irks me that people don't grasp that James Ironwood is disabled. Even then, they're SO ableist.

I fully understand what it's like to have your emotions shut off so you can do what you feel is right or what you MUST do in a certain situation. So much that you can't control when it happens or what you do during it. Seeing him CRY when his most trusted companion (he TRUSTED her with the knowledge he knew and rewarded her by making her the next candidate of the Winter Maiden) was betraying him because of his paranoia due to his PTSD? That was REAL to me. It was RAW.

Seeing toxic stans shit on the disabled asian man (who's conventionally white passing to non-asians) with PTSD is so triggering. It saddens me how he was handled. And how he became my instant favorite alongside Oz. Two of the opposing forces of team RWBY who are villains or "misguided" at best.

He's more lovable than the MCs. In what was only a singular volume.

While the MCs are SUPER arrogant and SO intolerable that fanfictions fixing the series make them better says leagues about how RWBY fell harder than Atlas.

Sorry for ranting, but my goodness. I hate how underappreciated James Ironwood is, how he's hated by most everyone and how the girls took credit for HIS plan and then condemned everyone they claimed to wish to protect to die, displaced from their home and in a kingdom that most definitely hates them and what they stand for.

He deserved so much better.

I'm having a flashback to that post saying James isn't disabled because he can walk. I just that post still breaks me I am not gonna lie.

But oh gosh I understand what you mean anon. While in my management job it was hell. I would have to push down my emotions and shut them off to get through the day because people where horrible but I couldn’t get emotional about it. Of course after being called too emotional and I tried to better control my emotions I was then accused of not caring :/.

The whole Winter and James thing is a it’s a thing and I hate it all lolZ. I hate how James is the only one to seem to care about the fight. I hate that Winter blames him for everything even stuff that’s not realistic to blame him for. I hate how it seems like Winter doesn’t give two shits about anyone. The tear itself can feel a little silly for lack of better words cuz it’s that dramatic single tear thing but like it at least shows James cares about Winter and hates what is happening unlike Winter who just takes the easy way out and decides to fight him rather then try and reach him and try and have the difficult conversation. As we see in the earlier scene where Emerald tricks him she has just given up on him without even trying and does t care that he’s suffering from PTSD and breaking from the pressure. The characters and the narrative hate him and shit all over him despite being the ones to break him in the first place.

Yea for me he became my favorite in volume 7 when we really saw what he was dealing with and the pressure he was under. I watched volume 7 during Covid after I left a really brutal management job and seeing James’s struggles reminded me so much of my own so I definitely connected with him. He’s so much more interesting because he’s allowed to make mistakes and have struggles and fail and it’s just more relatable then the mains who just….aren’t.

The mains are forced to be perfect and be seen as perfect in every action and it makes them so hard to relate to. I saw one twitter post that claimed Weiss was gaslighting herself in episode 2 when she said they screwed up. It’s kind of insane to me how fans just refuse to accept that sometimes the mains make mistakes and screw up but that doesn’t make them evil like James being flawed doesn’t make him evil.

Don’t apologize for ranting that’s what the inbox is here for! Volume 8 was a trainwreck and I hate how it ruined basically all of the characters to try and force a plot line to happen that just did not work at all and realistically would get more people killed then James’s plan would have.

James by far got screwed over the most but I think all of the characters deserve better then the bullshit we got.

[kidgetrash]

Monsters and Mana 2 - Save The World, Get The Girl - Chapter 4

Character:  Keith Kogane, Pidge Gunderson/Katie Holt, Lance McClain, Hunk Garrett, Shirogane Takashi, Coran, Princess Allura, Matt Holt

Pairings:  Keith/Pidge

Warnings!:  This is going to be one looooonnnggg fic! I think? So far I'm barely into the plot and I have four chapters, so let's see how far we go! I'll add warnings as they come up!

Summary: Information is shared.

A/N: Heyo! I am feeling somewhat human (as human as I get!) and have been able to do a tiny bit of typing and feel well enough to properly get this chapter up instead of just a link and I'm about to put up a masterlist! Enjoy!

Allura walked across the throne room to a large table bearing a map.  To the west lay the largest of the three countries, Prince Keith’s own Qiomend, to the south east Snagrore, and finally between the two lay the smallest country of Ephbe.  An area of the map where all three kingdoms met was marked with a green flag.

‘My intelligence shows that the princess is being held in this region.’

‘Then what are we waiting for?’  Keith asked, looking between the group.

‘For Allura to finish her report.’  Matt reminded him they had only just began to hear it.

‘Right.’  Keith deflated a little.

‘I appreciate your keenness, my friend.’  Matt patted his shoulder before beginning to walk around the table.  ‘Continue.’  He nodded to Allura.

‘As I was saying,’  she carried on as though she had never been interrupted, ‘the border where the three countries meet is a wasteland, desolate and roamed by gangs of bandits, used as a hiding place, a meeting spot, all away from the prying eyes of polite society.’

‘I know a bit about bandit gangs.’  Shiro spoke up for the first time.  ‘And the wasteland isn’t a place you want to be.  It’s lawless, brutal, certainly not somewhere a lady should go.’

‘I assure you, I am more than capable.  And the lady we are concerned with is the princess.  She must not be allowed to suffer even the barbarity of being held in the wastelands, for longer than is necessary, let alone what the Snagrore fiend have planned for her, no offence, Greyarrow.’

‘None taken.’  Hunk waved his hand.  ‘As long as she’s not held too close to Snagrore itself, I can move around freely.  No one will suspect someone like me, or him,’ he nodded to Shiro, ‘wandering around the wastelands, the problem is pretty boy and his companion here.’

‘Pretty boy?’  Keith asked while Lance commented; ‘Damn right, I’m pretty.’

‘He meant Keith.’  Allura poked him.  ‘Carry on, Hunk.’

‘We need these two to look more like they belong in the wastelands.  And you, Allura, because you don’t look like you belong in the wastelands either, but these two especially don’t.’

‘I can provide you with supplies and disguises.’  Matt waved a hand and servants brought in packs and clothes, seemingly he knew what they would need,  ‘Help yourselves, dull your weapons to hide their true fortitude, but please, bring my sister back alive.’

‘I vow on my life that she will come home unharmed.’  Keith swore seriously.

‘I appreciate it.’

‘Then let’s suit up and move out.’  Shiro was the first to move to the servants, taking the first pack and sorting through its contents.  Rations, flint and steel, rope, clothing, and everything else an adventurer may need.  ‘This will do nicely, Your Majesty.’

‘Good, then safe travels, to all of you.  May the gods go with you.’  Matt spun on his heel with a flourish of his cape, leaving through the doors he had come through with a wail of; ‘My poor sister!’

Chapter 3

Masterlist

[adorable-destination]

Veterinary Service in Bhopal

Are you a pet parent in Bhopal seeking for the finest care for your animal companion? So, look no further! Bhopal is home to a wealth of high-quality veterinary facilities to meet all of your pet's requirements. From regular check-ups to emergency treatment, these establishments provide a broad variety of services to keep your dogs healthy and happy.

Finding the Right Veterinary Clinic

Finding the ideal veterinarian facility for your pet is critical. You want a clinic that is both technologically advanced and manned by sympathetic and competent vets. There are various reputed clinics in Bhopal that meet your needs.

1. Comprehensive Care.

Veterinary clinics in Bhopal take pride in providing complete treatment for pets. Whether your pet need a regular vaccine or complicated surgery, these clinics have you covered. They provide a variety of treatments, including preventative care, dental care, diagnostic imaging, surgery, and more.

2. Experienced veterinarians.

The experience of the veterinarians at Bhopal Veterinary Services is one of the primary characteristics that distinguishes them. These specialists have extensive expertise treating a variety of diseases and disorders in dogs. They are committed to delivering the best care and attention to every pet patient that goes through their doors.

3. Emergency services.

Emergencies may occur at any moment, making it critical to have access to dependable emergency veterinarian services. In Bhopal, various facilities provide 24-hour emergency treatment for dogs. Whether your pet suffers from a sudden sickness or injury, you can be certain that aid is always accessible.

The Importance of Regular Checkups

Just like people, dogs need regular check-ups to maintain their health. Routine veterinarian appointments may help uncover underlying health concerns early on and prevent them from progressing to more serious problems. These check-ups also allow you to express any concerns or queries you have about your pet's health and well-being.

Pet Wellness Programs

Many veterinary clinics in Bhopal provide pet wellness programs to promote preventative treatment and general health. These programs usually involve frequent check-ups, vaccines, parasite control, and dietary counselling. Participating in these programs ensures that your pet gets the care it needs to live a long and healthy life.

Conclusion

Bhopal offers a wide range of veterinary services. Whether you need regular care or emergency treatments, you will find everything you need to keep your pet healthy and happy. Bhopal's veterinary clinics are committed to delivering the finest possible care for your pets, with expert doctors, cutting-edge facilities, and a focus on quality.

FAQs: 1. How frequently should my pet see the vet for a check-up?

It is advised that you take your pet for a check-up at least once a year, while this may vary based on your pet's age, health state, and any underlying issues.

2. What should I do if my pet has a medical emergency outside of normal clinic hours?

If your pet has a medical emergency outside of usual clinic hours, call the closest emergency veterinary clinic right away. They are prepared to manage emergency circumstances and give required treatment for your pet.

3. How can I keep my pet at a healthy weight?

Maintaining a healthy weight is critical to your pet's general health and well-being. You may do this by giving a well-balanced diet, engaging in regular exercise, and avoiding overfeeding. Your veterinarian may also provide advice on weight control.

4. Is there any pet insurance accessible in Bhopal?

Yes, there are various pet insurance alternatives available in Bhopal to aid with the expense of veterinarian treatment. It is important to compare several plans and choose the one that best meets your pet's demands and fits your budget.

5. What are some symptoms that my pet should visit a veterinarian?

Lethargy, lack of appetite, vomiting, diarrhea, trouble breathing, limping, and changes in behaviour or appearance are some of the most typical indicators that your pet need medical treatment. If you observe any strange symptoms, call a veterinarian right away.

[fe-fictions]

You still have Dimitri fics ??? Can u repost one pls ? :)

(i do have that one dima and byleth simultaneous confession ;3 )

If you had thought that you would be able to help him to the light, you would have done it years ago.

If you knew that guiding him to the trruth would have been this difficult, you would have done it much sooner. If only you’d woken up in time.

But despite knowing how Dimitri struggled and suffered, despite knowing how much he had changed, you were just glad to be able to return his humanity to him.

You were glad to bring him home, the war won, with your hand tightly held in his as you led him away from his tortured past…towards a bright future.

Your only regret was that you hadn’t a chance to tell him what you really wanted to, before you were overwhelmed by your army’s joyous cheers.

You were swept back to the monastery, your hands having left each other’s so you could participate in the festivities.

You didn’t expect to see the future king stepping out onto the balcony, safe from the overwhelming atmosphere of the victorious feast.

“Tired, already?” Dimitri’s voice floated from the doors, and you turned to find him standing there, a flute of champagne in each hand. He extended one to you as he joined you in the cool breeze, his hair billowing softly in the silent breeze.

“I can only handle so much, in one day.” You told him in a soft voice, “A lot has happened. I haven’t had enough time to process it all…it’s not something I can ignore for a party.”

“I know precisely what you mean.” He agreed with a slow nod, “I would love to enjoy the celebration with everyone else…but there is still so much to take care of. I cannot allow myself that luxury, yet. At the very least…I’m simply glad I can spend some time with you, after everything.”

“Me, too.” You smiled at him, before returning your gaze to the sky above. “It feels rather cold, tonight. As though we’re missing something.”

“We’re missing many things. Many people. It will be difficult to go on, without them…” He trailed off, frowning deeply as he unclasped his cloak. “The cold, however, it likely due to the chill of the night. This should help.”

You watched silently as he draped the thick fur over your shoulders, letting him clasp it across your shoulders. When he finished his work, he wound up closer to your side than before, the space between you practically nonexistent.

“Thank you.” You hummed, “But, you’re right. So many lives were lost…so many will be affected by our actions. I only hope that we can continue to affect them, but in better, more positive ways.”

“We will. We defeated the Empire together, and we’ll rebuild the kingdom…together. Just as we always have.” Dimitri assured you, his shoulder touching yours, now. “You know, I’m having trouble thinking of a battle where you weren’t by my side, helping me at every turn.”

“Perhaps you’ve replaced Dedue with me, in your mind.”

“Hardly. Everything between those five years you were gone…when I was gone…it’s all a blur. But before that? And afterwards? There you are. Every time. You never failed to be beside me.”

“And I plan on keeping it that way.” You told him earnestly, though you couldn’t bring yourself to look at him. You felt him shift beside you, and you swallowed, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “…That is…if you’ll have me.”

“Byleth…my teacher…my dearest companion…my beloved.”

You froze, eyes wide. When you looked up at him, his fingers took your chin, holding your gaze to his as though you were all he cared about.

“There is no other person I would want beside me for the rest of my days than you.”

“Dimitri…you…do you mean that?”

“With all my heart. And…I know I am not worthy of your love. Far from it. I still have much to do in order to fix all the mistakes I’ve made…to fully return from the monster I became. But if you’ll wait for me…if you’ll hold on for me…then I think I could one day become the man who is deserving of your love.”

“You always were.” You whispered, cupping his face with trembling fingers and drawing him into a kiss. Dimitri’s arms circled around your waist, pulling you flush against him. You could feel him smiling against your lips, biting back the laughter as the joy overwhelmed his soul.

You were feeling the exact same way.

“Byleth… I love you.”

“I love you, too. I…I-I can’t wait to see where the future takes us.” You whispered sweetly, kissing him once more.

“So long as we’re together…I can only look forward to the possibilities.”

[prelovednikaidou]

corrupt; draken, ken ryuguji [01]

Summary:

In which you met the man of your past, but he didn't come back to remind you of the bitter break-up. Draken had one thing in mind and it was to never let you leave his side ever again. Distance made the heart grow fonder but he'd rather let you spend the rest of your life hating him if it meant you'd never leave his sight.

"I don't wish you well when you ain't with me, I want you crying."

Warning:

mention of suicide, oral receiving (reader),

a/n: taglist are open up to 10 users! comment '☁️'

Word count: 2.1k

series masterlist

[01: jealousy]

Draken wanted to take you away.

The curves of your spine, flowing down to the slope of your well-rounded bottom flesh, he watched the symmetrical dimple right above your butt - mocking him that those precious intimate spots were no longer his possession to own.

It wasn't only him who shared the same thought; everyone in this crowded room had their eyes glued on you. As if you were holding those guests captive, you felt immense pressure on your feet and thighs, quivered before you wrapped your leg around the shining pole.

Spinning, spinning, spinning.

Those blinding lights showered your sweating figure in all fairness, the sound of Abel's voice had long dimmed down, it meant that your show was done. It was silent in a minute,

lifting your face - your lips curled into a hunting smile and the room soared with cheers, crumpled money tossed across the stage, but your sense of content was suppressed by the overwhelming tension.

A pair of black pupils were starring at you - pinning you to where you stood. He was among the crowd, all in his glory without care but you. You felt something burst inside your chest, unable to tear your focus from him.

This longing for him is toxic.

Flashes of memories where those sober eyes bore into yours when he pumped his fat cock into your tight cunt until his thick cum over spilled, the same eyes that once shone with so much love but turned cold.

"Dollface!"

A shout from backstage startled you from your daze, another coworker came up and escorted you down, assisting you to take off the painful high heels.

"What's with you?" She threw a curious stare your way.

You still couldn't wrap your mind. He was there. Flesh and soul, presented in front of you. It was a brief eye contact but it was enough. Enough to tell you that he was coming back for you.

It had been years since the two of you chose to split up, making your paths without each other's companion.

"I, I've got to go. I forgot that I locked the windows, my cat's probably waiting for me. He's been out for 3 days so he's starving I think. Y'all can continue without me,"

You stood but your knees turned weak at the sudden arrival of him, standing by the door. A few steps taken back, you lost all rationality to stay calm because your heart thumped loudly.

Standing tall on his 6' ft, athletic and young Draken was nowhere to be seen but replaced - with a mature adult man that induced everything he carried into lust.

The robust body looked incredibly fit, lean, and you could see the strong outlines of his defined chest and abdominal muscles from the black shirt. If it was years ago, those leather jackets wouldn't suit him - he'd look like those up-start wannabe gangsters.

But it was different now. It clung to his broad shoulders perfectly, he wasn't as cheap as those local pranksters. The dark jeans also did little job in hiding his long legs. He was indeed a member of a gang; eerie and cruel - but he had never look this good that you want to fuck.

Draken's presence was enough to brush away every man in the room that you belonged to him. Your little admirers couldn't even look at him in the eyes, let alone make up a fight.

They left with a strong sense of defeat; no wonder you never once accept any confessions, turned out you have such a man waiting.

"Why is he here? This area is off-limits. Only staff is allowed. Naoki, guide him out." You forced yourself to mutter those words, uncaring to look at him with your back facing him.

Naoki sighed, this man literally slipped $750 under the table just to meet you. Those incompetent flies who claimed to love you didn't even spare this much effort. She only signaled him to step in before she whispered to you,

"Remember the guy I told you? The one that booked a whole session for your private room? He's that guy. It's just that he arrived a little early than the arranged meeting but it'll be great if you can build a connection with him."

You glared back, "Then send him back. We still have a week before that, right? I'm tired. I can't keep up with this," You pushed off her hand from your shoulder, began to take off your wig. His eyes were still the same; always undressing you naked.

Naoki could only grit her teeth, the money already landed in her pocket. What if he asked it back? She can't let such a great deal slip so she greeted him,

"She's a bit tired from the recent show. How about we push this to tomorrow? She's got free time on her hand to rest too." At least, this would do, right?

"If I have so much time on my hands, I wouldn't have come a week early. So you guess it yourself." His voice has changed too. It was an octave lower, you immediately rubbed your thighs together before you waved a hand.

"Haaa... leave us, Naoki. But I need you to go to my house. I wasn't joking about what I said earlier."

Naoki hurriedly nodded, clutching to her pocket before her eyes warily darted from Draken to you. Is this a couple feud? She noted in her head that she'd help this guy soon in the future - who doesn't want easy money?

"Okay, I will. Sir...? Err.. hope you have a pleasant chat with Dollface. I will excuse myself then ." The hindrance in Draken's eyes finally left the room, the door closed in a thump and the subtle tension thickened.

He didn't say anything, only leaned his body by the door as he watched you wiped off your makeup. This was his morning view back when you were still wet behind ears about pole dancing. You'd come back at the crack of drawn and he'd already been out to his workshop.

"Dollface."

Stubborn like a little cat, your doe eyes didn't look up from your make-up bag and he could see through your act to be so busy. He loved how feisty you've become after years. It eased his heart that you could chase off those little shit.

"It suits you, [Y/N]. Face so pretty like a doll. Make one's heart itch to keep around. But I wonder why the name sounds so familiar."

"State your business. I'm heading home straight after this so don't expect a lap dance or something."

"Then that's the plan. I'll drive you home, eh?"

That damn 'eh'. He picked up your habit too well that the time he spent with you shaped him into copying your habit. It sounded cute but your heart still couldn't forgive him. Let him suffer a little.

"Don't need to. My boyfriend is great at doing his job. So do me a favor and let me rest quickly, how about that?"

Now, you were looking at him through the mirror. It was just too hard for you to muster yourself to face him directly. Draken didn't seem shaken. He stood straightly, you clenched your thighs tighter.

"Have I ever been quick in everything when I'm with you, [Y/N]?" His towering figure gawked over your smaller frame - casting his shadow over you as his sharp facial features caught your attention.

"Can't remember. Maybe? Because I said it just now almost like a reflex." You replied, not backing down but instead, squaring up to him that your ample breasts brushed against his torso.

His cologne didn't smell like the tacky, cheap body spray he used to own. This one smelled so expensive, alienated your memory of his familiar scent.

"Now you're getting older, your memory is getting rusty, dollface. Should I put on a play and see if you can call anything in mind?" You felt your breath became heavier but he didn't let you lose your focus yet.

Your chin was tugged upwards, the shadow of his cap cast upon his face and you remembered now; it was his eyes. Because he wasn't vocal about his feelings, you could understand everything from his eyes.

"You've grown softer, Draken. I almost threw up listening to you talk like this. What, are you changing jobs now? Don't tell me you went from a gangster to a con artist."

No, you were lying to yourself. Draken didn't change but improved. Change can be something bad but he never did anything that would bring him down. He just got better.

And it was true when the velvety touch on your beating pulse suddenly moved to your lips before he squished your cheeks in his hand.

"Fucking hot as hell but so damn annoying." He laughed, the light from his eyes never return, only replaced by a wicked glint.

He wanted to take you to his place, fuck you in his bed until you couldn't walk properly so he'd have more reasons to keep you at his place. He wanted to swallow you whole and he barely even started but why was it so damn hard to have you?

"Don't dare to think of anything nasty. You might not care about commitment in a relationship, but I do. So take your hands off me, Draken."

"Kenie. It's Kenie for you."

Your lips were so plump and wet, his other arm wrapped around your waist - hoisting you up to his body before he leaned by the dresser.

You shrieked when his scalding hot palm touched your naked back and as he untied the strings of your bra, he smiled at your face as he said,

"Do you think I'm going to believe that, dollface? Do you really think I don't know that this pussy hasn't been fucked well for months? I have eyes across this ward. You don't get to fool me."

Heat rose to your face, your small hands pushed on his shoulders, "You're still up in my business? Sounds like someone can't fucking move on."

He nodded, ripping off your lacey bralette and his big hands began to palm your heavy breast - carelessly rubbing your nipple with his thumb. You fought the urge to moan, you hold onto his shoulder for dear strength.

"You're right. I can't move on." Your breath hitched, he nuzzled his face to the column of your neck, inhaling so deep, and wrapped his arms tightly around your body. He missed you so much. So much that if you ran away again, he'd just kill himself.

"I fucked my fist thinking of you. I got this hard just by thinking of you. I'm not ashamed of it."

"That's your problem, Draken. I'm not you. I'm living my best life right now, and sorry that I can still cum just with my fingers."

"That's my girl," He pushed you until your back met the concrete wall, your eyes widened when he took off his cap and put it on you before he dropped to his knees.

"I am aware of your appetite, [Y/N]. You won't be happy with such a small meal. You always keep coming back to have your tight pussy stuffed. Even when we were living together, you couldn't stop begging my dick every night."

"What the hell are you talking about-" You pushed his forehead away from your private part, one hand covering your pussy but he gripped the side of your hips - bringing you straight to his mouth.

"I don't care if you use me as your favorite Cherry Twins. But don't deny that I made you cummed the hardest when I was in your life, dollface."

Your eyes became misty, his words just flew through your head - empty when his mouth latched on your clothed crotch, lapping on the small fabric that the nudge of his tongue probed on your budding clit.

Cherry Twins were the name he gave to your vibrators. Since he was always out when you were at home, he'd make you use them to your greedy cunt - even made a video call so he could jerk off in the public restroom.

You were wild, but he taught you to live even wilder.

Next page: chapter [02] →

a/n : next chapter is full smut bcs thats the only thing my brain's capable of. Taglist are open up to 10 users! Comment '☁️’.

Taglist: @hanmascult @q-the-rockaholic @hikkarins

[dimdiamond]

Bagginshield fic list

Yeah, I decided to make one too because there are enough to cause me headaches and I'd like to have them somewhere organized. Please look at the tags before reading them!

Fix-it fics

Desperate magic by BeautifulFiction: Bilbo is left to tend Thorin as he hovers on the brink of death after the Battle of the Five Armies. Is love enough to save Erebor's king, or is this the last farewell?

Lay your troubles down by Avelera: An extended version of "the acorn scene." Bilbo sees his chance to snap Thorin out of his madness, and takes it.

The Riven Crown by BeautifulFiction: The aftermath of war is no laughing matter. Those who died must be honoured, those who are wounded must be healed, and those who remain need food and clothing, peace and sanctuary. With Thorin's life hanging in the balance, it is up to Bilbo and the rest of the Company to rule the rag-tag remnants of Erebor in his place. Then there is the matter of the gold... Can Bilbo save both king and kingdom, or is Erebor destined to fall deeper into ruin?

The Color of Possibility by lindoreda: When Bilbo puts himself between Thorin and Azog's blade, his mithril shirt protecting them both, it isn't long before some dwarves whisper that 'Oakenshield' might not be the best epithet for their king anymore. But for Bilbo, barred from Thorin's sight since the battle, this new epithet only adds to the sting. Spending his days caring for the recovering princes, Bilbo wonders how much more of this he can take, not suspecting his place at the center of a silent divide in the company.

Homesick by Margo_Kim: Five years after they've reclaimed Erebor, Thorin is sick of home, Bilbo is just sick, and neither is handling the situation ideally.

The Road Delivered Us Home by keelywolfe: In the years since Bilbo left Erebor, he has lost his respectability, gained a nephew, and gotten on with life at Bag End. He'd left aside adventure for the comforts and peace of his little Hobbit hole, and for the love of a child who needed him. Though perhaps, adventures can yet find him.

Notices in the Paper by YamBits: Bilbo returns to the Shire after his adventure, newly married, and newly homeless, after his two year absence allowed the Sackville-Bagginses to obtain Bag End. Bilbo and Thorin go to the Tooks for help, and find newly orphaned Frodo Baggins, also looking for a home.

A Royal Guardianship by ladyoakenshields: When Bilbo and Thorin return to the Shire for a sabbatical during Yuletide, they find a reason to retire the throne in Erebor sooner than expected.

The Shire's gems by awkwarng3: Thorin, Bilbo, and Frodo move to the Shire after raising Frodo in Erebor, and Frodo makes a friend.

Time travel fix-it fics

An expected journey by MarieJacquelyn: For years Bilbo has written about his adventures and told stories about his dealings with dwarves and dragons. To most it seemed like fanciful nonsense but to Bilbo it was all very real. A weight followed him home from his travels, one called regret. Now in his final moments Bilbo has a choice to make – go quietly into death’s embrace or go back again and face all the fear and pain for the chance to make things right? Of course, change is a fickle thing and not everything can be done again as Bilbo is about to find out. In the end, it may not only be salvation that he’s fighting for.

Bilbo Baggins, warrior of the Valar by Pallalalo: Bilbo raised his eyebrows. “And you’ve come to the Shire to look for this someone? My, Gandalf, I wonder if you know Hobbits at all. They would tell you that adventures are nasty, disturbing, uncomfortable things. That they would make you late for dinner.” Bilbo recalled his own words perfectly. It had been something he and Gandalf had looked back on with bittersweet laughter. This Gandalf however noticed his exact words. “Would they now? And what about you, mhm? What would you tell me about adventures?” #The Valar send Bilbo back in time, to the day where Gandalf asks him to join in an adventure. After living a lifetime of regret and suffering, he vows to change things for the better. For Thorin. For Frodo. But will he succeed?

I'll die to care for you by thehufflepuffhobbit: His gaze landed on Mahal's eyes once more. "You did your best, Thorin." It was tempting to look away; he wanted to deny that with everything he had. It certainly didn't feel as though falling into Gold Sickness and then dying was doing his best. Mahal smirked, as though he knew Thorin's desire to contradict him, and pinched his cheek before walking over to a table. "Aye, I didn't think you would believe me. I'm not lying, it certainly could have gone better. More according to my plan, but I know you really did try." "Your plan?" He didn't know if he should ask, really. Knowing that his Maker had set a course for him, he didn't want to think about the ways he had done everything wrong. There were too many examples of mistakes in his long life, too many opportunities that he had missed that had probably been planned for him from the beginning. Or:Mahal feels like Thorin fucked up his legacy and gives him a do over.

Darker times ahead by Reach4theSky: Bilbo is sailing to the Undying Lands but wary of letting go of the guilt that has been with him for many decade. His most sincerest wish is to go back and change what was done. Before reaching the lands of peace and healing, he dies aboard the ship and finds that his wish is being granted, not because he is the one to wish it but because this is the dwarves last chance to escape a fate of eternal waiting. He finds that not only is he going to be sent back to his younger body, but so is the entire Company of Thorin Oakenshield. Time is a fickle thing and not all the members have their memories returned to them at the same time. The journey on becomes interesting as the dwarves slowly remember and fight for themselves and their kin, yet new hurdles are thrown at them when they realize that more people remember than expected...

Of an arcane binding by Salvia_G: An inexplicable magic ties Bilbo Baggins, hobbit of the Shire, to Thorin, dwarven prince of Erebor.

Legends by DomesticGoddess: The fellowship has set out on its noble quest to destroy the ring and put an end to the threat that is Sauron! Just set out really, barely left the gates of Imladris, but things are going smoothly enough so far. That is until the two most unlikely party crashers fall upon their little fellowship. Uncle Bilbo and the Legendary Thorin Oakenshield?! Frodo just wants to know what's going on but the two of them won't stop hollering at each other long enough for anyone to get a word in edgewise. Suddenly, their little group is joined by Frodo's two biggest heroes and he discovers there was a lot more to Uncle Bilbo's stories than he realized.

Beside myself by bliboboggins: "What are you doing? Just who do you think you are?" Startled, Bilbo turned around slowly. And there, in a familiar patchwork dressing gown, brandishing a fire poker wildly about, was... Bilbo.

Erebor never fell au fics

The hearth doesn't make the home by Moonrose91: For things Bilbo could not change, he was condemned to a life of isolation, with the belief that none could love him. And then a Dwarf came to Hobbiton.

Clarity of vision by Mithen: In a Middle-Earth where Erebor never fell, a shadow remains in the heart of the Lonely Mountain. Bilbo Baggins finds himself drawn reluctantly into a quest that will lead him across the continent--from Bree to Lake Evendim to the icy North and beyond--with a party of five dwarves searching for an artifact that will cure the ailing King Thrór.

Ghivashel by mdseiran: The last thing Bilbo expects when he stays up late one night is company. The strange dwarf and his companion crash into his life and prove unexpected saviours. But the dwarf seems to think he will be joining them on their travels, and Bilbo has no such intentions.

The Song of My Heart by DomesticGoddess: After a failed attempt of trying to carve out a new home in the Blue Mountains for his people, Thorin finds himself beseeching the Hobbit Thain and his council for a place for his people in their bountiful land. An agreement is struck and plans in the works for integrating his people into their land. The only condition being an arranged marriage between himself and one of their family heads. A small price to pay to see his people safe and well fed. Unfortunately, he’s to marry the most disagreeable hobbit in all the Shire who also seems to hold a personal grudge against him. If only he could figure out why his new betrothed hates him so much.

Oak and Mistletoe by HildyJ: After a life dominated by a strange form of sickness, Thorin is sent to the Shire to seek a cure only Bilbo Baggins can offer.

Karkûn shukula - A Cinderella AU by harrypanther: When the Prince of the Shire visits the Kingdom of Erebor, there is great excitement. There are hopes he will choose to marry one of the Royal Family, cementing an alliance that would secure food supplies for the dwarven Kingdom and gain new allies. All eligible dwarves are expected to attend a series of Balls. Unknown to the guests, there is a third royal child, manoeuvred out by his ambitious stepmother, for whom this may be his last chance of restoring his fortunes and escaping his fate…

Alone this Yuletide by Emsiecat: 'Alone this Yuletide? Irritated with prying and nosey family members? I am an out of work blacksmith currently trying to make my way by any means necessary that does not involve my resorting to thievery (prisons are most uncomfortable, I've unfortunate first hand experience). However, if you would like me to be your strictly platonic companion for any social function, but have me pretend that we are in a serious courtship, so as to torment your family and ward off unwanted suitors then I am more than obliging...' After becoming increasingly irritated by overtures of romance from various Shire residents following the death of his mother four years ago, Bilbo is more than ready to resort to desperate measures. That is, up to and including pretending to be in a serious relationship with a certain surly blacksmith currently inhabiting the Bindbale Woods. It's a good idea after all; all they have to do is pretend to be in love over the Yuletide period and Bilbo's family and suitors will surely leave him alone after that. It's perfect! And nothing can possibly go wrong, right? Certainly nothing as preposterous as falling for one another for real...

Modern au fics

Nothing gold can stay by perkynurples: Bilbo Baggins led a rather peaceful life, thank you very much, until an old acquaintance decided to turn it upside down, and he found himself agreeing to take a job that’s… let’s say not exactly up his alley, and might eventually cost him a little more than his treasured cozy lifestyle. Who would have thought tutoring a slightly menacing monarch’s more than slightly overbearing nephew could prove to be such an adventure?

Love-In-Idleness by perkynurples: Taking Bilbo Baggins, a successful movie actor who is only just getting used to the perks and intricacies of becoming A Face People Want To See, and putting him together with Thorin Oakenshield, with his very traditional (read: slightly backwards) ideas about what constitutes Real Art and Real Talent, might very well be viewed as just some clothead’s idea of a joke. But there are jokes, and then there are carefully calculated risks the size of controversial reproductions of classic Shakespearean plays - for Bilbo, it is the chance of a lifetime to prove himself to all those who have ever deemed him too one-dimensional to even attempt stage, while Thorin has the opportunity to get out of the rut that’s been hindering his career for so long now, and shine in a role worthy of his talent once again. That is if the two learn how to share the same space for more than ten minutes without wanting to tear each other’s hair out. The course of true love never did run smooth, after all…

Candid by northerntrash: Thorin wasn't entirely sure why there was a six-foot candid photograph of him hanging in this exhibition, but he was going to wring the neck of whoever had put it there. In which Bilbo is a photographer, Thorin an accidental model, and Gandalf just likes to make trouble for everyone.

How the west was won and where it got us by stickman: Bilbo is a harried 1st year British literature Ph.D. (early 20th century fiction) who happens to have an interest in spatial narrative structures, a lack of time-management skills, and a tiny apartment with a lot of books and very little furniture. He’s stressed, always, and doesn't quite know where he belongs. He tells himself that really, this is, in fact, what he wants to be doing. But sometimes, as much as he loves books, he gets an urge to do something with his hands. Thorin is a disgruntled M.Arch. 1 in his last year who can’t be arsed to shave and frightens his students, and, frankly, his profs, but his work is top-notch so no one can really say much. They can, however, bully him into running a hands-on design workshop on Saturday mornings, which is complete crap, because he’s used to drinking his Friday nights into oblivion so showing up at Milstein at 7:45 the next morning and trying to teach in a room of wall-to-wall windows as the sun rises is not at the top of his list. Besides, no one ever shows up. Except one morning, someone does. [graduate school AU]

Butterfly effect by eyra: Yoga wasn’t for him. Yoga was for interesting people. Luminous people; people who took gap years and spoke a foreign language. People who ate lentils and burned incense and had fantastic, colourful friends with fantastic, colourful lives full of travel and silent retreats and those baggy trousers with elephants on them. Yoga was decidedly not for people like Bilbo, who wore cardigans and ate beans on toast and whose linguistic capabilities stretched only as far as a rusty Spanish A-Level. Just your regular story of boy meets yoga instructor.

Remover of the obstacles by MistakenMagic: "Dis often chided her older brother for being a misanthropist. She did it so often it had become a term of endearment. It was true that Thorin struggled with people; he struggled to form and maintain relationships. Dr. Grey had diagnosed him with this and Thorin hadn’t the heart to tell him this wasn’t a symptom of his PTSD, it was a symptom of his personality. He exercised a sense of apathy with almost everyone he met… But Bilbo was different. Thorin actually found himself wanting to know more about him."

Color outside the lines by andquitefrankly: Kindergarten has just gotten significantly better. Just ask Thorin, who's got the biggest crush on the new kid in class, Bilbo Baggins. With the help of his friends, Thorin knows that he can take back the swings from the 1st graders, show up the K-1 class in the school pageant, and win the heart of one curly haired boy. Yup. Kindergarten is going to be a year to remember.

Bran' New Suit by pibroch (littleblackdog): Andrew's description had been sufficient to recognize him— a riot of honey brown curls, short in stature, a well-favoured face with expressive features— but it hadn't quite been enough to prepare Tom for the sharp, almost painful tug in his gut at the sight of the man. They had never met before, to the best of Tom's recollection, but there was something eerily and inexplicably familiar about him all the same.

Different species au fics

I've grown a hedge around my heart by pibroch (littleblackdog): "Thorin was the essence of so many Buckland oddities, distilled into one misfortunate young hobbit, much to his infinite embarrassment. Built like a stork, his father had said once, in an example of Thrain Brandybuck’s usual tactless humour. All beak and legs." Thorin Brandybuck, just recently come of age, still lives in his family’s smial in Buckland, with his parents and two younger siblings. Thorin is an odd duck amongst his relations and neighbours-- unsociable, grumpy, shy, and awkward. And beyond that, he looks rather strange even for a Bucklander, strongly favouring the thick, dark haired build of his Stoorish blood. It defies all sense and reason why Bilbo Baggins, an exemplar of all the respectable traits Thorin lacked, would ever desire a friendship with him. Bilbo, as Thorin discovers, is not always as sensible as he appears.

In which the dwarves are satyrs for reasons by HiddenKitty What the title says basically.

Bride of the demon king by DomesticGoddess: Thorin is King of the demons, a beast-like race feared by humans. Ever since the demons and humans formed a truce years ago, the humans have sent a young human every year as a tribute to the King of demons. Thorin is tired of having to deal with the tribute that has long since lost its meaning. The only tribute he'd be interested in is the boy he met fifteen years ago on the border of the demon and human realms. Despite his fantasies, Thorin knows the chances of ever seeing the boy again are slim to none, until they're not.

Lost He Wandered Under Leaves by serenbach: Thorin son of Thrain is a struggling blacksmith descended from a fallen line of kings. In an attempt to provide for his family over the winter, he reluctantly accepts an impossible sounding task - to hunt down an enchanted deer that lives in the Old Forest that borders the Shire, and make armour and weapons from its hide and antlers. He never expected to succeed. And he certainly never expected what he found to change his life so completely.

A Dryad's Tale by Bilbo Baggins by Moongazer12: Bilbo is a dryad (think little sibling to ents). Long ago a curse was placed upon him from destroying one of the rings of power. Whenever he touches someone with his bare skin he will make them insane. But despite this, he and Gandalf have gone on many adventures to help protect Middle Earth (What was the point to destroying the ring if something else destroyed it instead?) Gandalf has called on him once again to help on a quest, Bilbo just hopes that they read his amendments to the contract.

The quest but with a twist au fics

King, come at the red morning by Tawabids: Bilbo has heard fairytales of the lost prince of the dwarves, Thorin son of Thrain, who disappeared the day Smaug attacked the Lonely Mountain. But he does not believe in fairytales until he comes across the dwarf sleeping in the depths of Erebor, and kisses him back to life. Now Thorin - a hundred and fifty years out of his time - has to confront a world in which his city is empty, his people scattered, his baby brother Frerin is king, two nephews he's never met are missing in action, and a war is brewing right on his doorstep. And as if that wasn't complicated enough he's trapped in the body of an old man and falling stupidly in love with a gossipy, grudging little hobbit.

When the sun rises by Harry1981: Bilbo Baggins of Bag End was not a very respectable Hobbit. No respectable Hobbit had a sword and crossbow hanging in their home, nor did they have Dwarves as family. But Bilbo Baggins did, and all of Shire knew of his husband, blacksmith Thorin Oakenshield. When Bilbo comes home to find his Husband earlier than expected, he learns of a quest to reclaim Erebor. It is a death mission. Bilbo knows that Dwarves are stubborn creatures, and none more than Thorin himself. But nobody said that Bilbo himself was any less stubborn. So he will follow his dearest husband across all of Middle Earth, through plains and mountains and forests, all while hiding the true nature of their relationship (Dwarven politics never helped anyone), brushing off some old wounds (and getting new ones) and finding out new things about the dwarf Bilbo calls husband (and his extended family). Nobody ever said love was easy, after all.

Small, but fierce by DomesticGoddess: As a result of a magical mishap during the trip to the lonely mountain, Bilbo is reverted to a wee little hobbitling. Only in body, of course. His adult mind is still very aware of the indignity of it all (seriously! He doesn't need to be coddled, carried, and fed like a child). It turns out, dwarves love children and there is nothing cuter than Hobbit children. Bilbo soon realizes that he can get away with just about anything in his babyish form and starts taking full advantage of it. Even the grumpy brooding king can't deny the angelic little creature anything he desires (and Bilbo's going to milk that for all it's worth).

Your song like a home in my heart by Nennvial: In Middle Earth, all creatures have a soulmate. Not all have some, but if they do, it is a bond nothing can break, not even death. The more famous story of such a bound was the story of Bren and Luthien, who even defied detath. The way someone can find out that the other is one’s soulmate is through song: when they meet and hear the voice of the other, a song sings in their heart, which feels like home and makes them complete. They may refuse it if they wish to do so, but they hence risk a life of bitter looniness. Thorin Oakenshield and Bilbo Baggins are soulmates, but they must admit it to themselves throughout their journey to Erebor.

To Dungeons Deep (And Caverns Old) by KingUndertheMountain: Bilbo Baggins was not your average hobbit. Of course, he had the wonderfully groomed and well-taken-care-of hairy feet like every other one of his race, yes, but he was not like other hobbits. He was cursed. Or, as the witch who gave him the enchantment put it, was “gifted”. She had given him the “gift” of obedience – whenever there was a direct command given to him, for example “cook a large meal” or “take a walk”, he could not disobey. Not without a lot of pain and eventual submission.

Chocolate candy one-shots

The world is sleeping (my world is you) by katheneverwrites (mandolinearts): I asked Persephone, “How could you grow to love him? He took you from flowers to a kingdom where not a single living thing can grow.” Persephone smiled, “My darling, every flower on your earth withers. What Hades gave me was a crown made for the immortal flowers in my bones.” - Nikita Gill ---“What do you mean, my friend?” There is a line of thought that surfaces in Gandalf’s mind, but he drowns it before it can take root. Surely not. But Bilbo’s chuckle sets him on edge. The small, gentle god of harvest, nature, and flowers sits up straighter, and in his crown of flowers there is a wire of strong metal, his cloak is suddenly not colorful anymore but the deepest black and he is terrifying, horrific, powerful - “I married Thorin Oakenshield, King Under the World.”

Of seasons by northerntrash: As far as he could tell, he had been kidnapped, which in itself made this week more than a little unusual. In which Bilbo steals away the Lord of Death, and Thorin can't quite bring himself to stay angry about it.

Warm up by paranoid_fridge: On one of their walks, Bilbo tumbles into a stream. They make it back to Bag End and Bilbo demands Thorin warm him up.

Royal Blue And Crimson Red by Mistofstars: Here's what happened before and after Bilbo accidentally eavesdrops on Gandalf and Elrond at night in Rivendell, as they discuss Thorin's quest and his family's history. Oh, and Thorin and Bilbo share a room, of course ;)

I was young when I left home by Margo_Kim: There was a pity clapper somewhere in the third row. Thorin finished his fourth song to polite applause from the people who noticed that the song was finished, but within the smattering of claps was someone beating his hands together like he was trying to rhythmically kill a fly. There was usually one of those, the kind who notices that no one else is paying attention and so is determined to compensate for that regardless of how they feel about the actual music. Thorin ignored him. It was easy to do so—he'd always hated looking at the audience when the singing was done.

A matter of buttons by StupidFatPenguin: “Your shirt,” says Thorin, quite out of the blue, and Bilbo looks down his front to see if there is a spot of tea or jam or anything equally embarrassing spilled on it. He is relieved to find nothing of the sort and looks up at the dwarf with an eyebrow raised in question. Thorin sits mute, his still-smoking pipe forgotten in his hand. He looks on for long moments still, seems almost lost to a thought before he shifts and lifts his gaze to meet Bilbo’s inquiring face. “It is familiar to me. Did you not wear this on the eve we met?” In which Bilbo and Thorin re-enact the evening they met.

The ladder by Milliethekitty27: Inspired from a post made by wheeloffortune-design on tumblr. Tired of his lonely kitchen in Yavanna's Garden, Bilbo Baggins wonders if the dwarven love of being underground is true in death. If so, maybe his dwarves are living (ha ha) under the very land Bilbo is weeding. With that thought, Bilbo goes and asks Hamfast for a shovel.

Love hobbit by HybridOwl: Bilbo Baggins considers himself a bit of a cock up, all things considered. He never made it out of his small highway adjacent town, can't seem to stop chain-smoking, and overall has more to talk about with the plants in his shop than 90% of all the rest of Middle Earth. So when he's reading the morning paper and a love note that can't be for anyone but him pops up, he's pretty sure - almost positive, really - that he's being made fun of. "TO the chain-smoking little stud who collects two metros from Gamgee's Goods every morning, will you be my love hobbit? - Bearded Biker." (heavily inspired by tumblr posts)

Fusion with other fandoms au fics

The Second Time by authoressjean; Sebastian Moran can't pull the trigger on John Watson to save his own hide, and what the hell is it with the doctor, anyway? Then Gandalf shows up, meddlesome wizard, and reminds him none too gently of his past life: as Thorin Oakenshield, leader of a company that had once included a small hobbit named Bilbo Baggins. One that looked decidedly like John Watson. And this would be the perfect chance to make things right with Bilbo the way he really hadn't been able to before he died, and that's when Gandalf tells him John doesn't remember being Bilbo, and to leave him alone. Right. Like that's going to happen.

And sow a star divided in us by MistakenMagic: Short summary: Gays in space! Longer summary: After his first successful solo mission, Jedi Knight Bilbo Baggins, trained by High Council member and full-time nuisance, Master Gandalf, returns to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant. During an excursion to the sparring arena, he meets a group of Dwarven Jedi from Ered Luin, a mountainous planet located in the Outer Rim. Young padawans, Fili and Kili, are full of curiosity at this strange, barefoot Jedi, but Master Thorin, who appears to have the personality of a rancor and mental shields like blast doors, is less than impressed.

Comics you should definitely check

Every work by rutobuka, seriously they're criminally cute and they're not still favored by everyone without reason.

Retelling the Hobbit by Mellow_Comics: Bilbo has never been good at telling the "true" story of what happened on his journey to the Lonely Mountain. Now he's trying to turn the tale of his quest into a lighthearted children's book-- a bedtime story for his young nephew Frodo. But what really happened on his journey? And how did it actually affect him? This is a comic adaptation/retelling of the Hobbit! It's framed as a bedtime story that Bilbo is telling a younger Frodo.

For now these are some of my personal favourites! However, I'm sure my list will grow since my reading list has some gems still waiting for me to read, so be certain that there will be a part 2 of this list!

[sekceesimps]

The Adeptus’s Temptation (Xiao x reader oneshot)

summary: Xiao watches and reacts to his darling being flirted with by a certain Geo Archon.  angst (kinda) but ends with fluff.  

a/n Hey anon, I loved your requests so I decided to do both of them… hope you enjoy it! Thanks for the love and feel free to leave another request (that goes for all of you!) 

This is sort of a more in depth version of the Xiao part in the Genshin Jealousy HCs

Also sorry for the delays between publishing, Tea and I have been busy with our personal lives, but we’re trying to write more! 

Keep liking and following us, it genuinely motivates me to write. 

 Sincerely Coffee  

Who would have ever thought that the Conqueror of Demons, the Vigilant Yaksha, the great adeptus Xiao would ever have a significant other that was human. Certainly not you and definitely not him. 

Xiao is not someone who is easy to open up and be kind, but you managed to break through his cold and harsh demeanor. A surprise to the adeptus who had resigned himself to living his life alone and far from others. You are someone special to him in a world filled with incompetent and useless humans. 

It took some time for him to allow you to spend more days with him and even allow you to initiate physical affection. At first, it came as a relief when you were out doing commissions or just going out to work, he needed his space after all. He was worried about how fast he was falling for you and clung onto the hope that the space he left would allow him to protect himself. 

As your warmth and presence grew on him more, a part of him yearned to be at your side and let you closer to his heart. He had put up his icy walls to combat the heartbreak that comes after losing friend after friend, he was distraught with how quickly you broke through to him. He grumbled at your hand holding, but leaning into your touch nonetheless. 

Your dangerous commissions started to lessen as he refused to let you take on the most harmful of enemies without him. After all, he had no idea what he would do if he lost you. 

Xiao’s favorite thing to do with you is sit at the top of Wangshu Inn or even just the cliff sides of Liyue and bask in your attention and presence. He practically glowed under your loving gaze and from the light brushes of your hand against his. He had known the land for thousands of years and he had seen the most beautiful of landscapes in his time guarding it. He thought that he had seen every stunning thing in this world, that was at least until he met you. 

Your bravery, resilience, and overwhelming beauty had completely captured him, and as time went on he fell further and further for you. The life he envisioned the two of you to live together was a calm and peaceful one. He knew it probably wouldn’t be possible with the nature of both of your responsibilities and his own life span, but an adeptus could still dream.  

Now as much as Xiao wants to protect you, he can’t really leave Liyue. He’s able to help you when you’re here with him, but he’s essentially powerless when you go to Mondstadt. Of course, he’s entertained the thought of just leaving for a bit and staying by your side to protect you. In the end, he always lets you leave for work with a light kiss to your forehead and a heavy feeling in his heart. 

You had accustomed him to your soft affections and gentle mannerisms. He was always reluctant in letting you leave, but he trusted your abilities and simply had to stew in his reluctance when you were gone. He often told you to simply call out his name if you were in trouble and he’d be there in a moment. To this you would simply smile and reassure him with soft kisses to the top of his head. It was a miracle when he had managed to convince you to take on more commissions and bounties in the Liyue area. It made it easier for him to come to your side for aid and also to watch over you. It also allowed for more frequent dates, which made both of you incredibly happy. 

You always had the most interesting stories from your time adventuring. When you two were relaxing on loving moonlight nights, he looked forward to the smile on your face when you spoke in detail about your commissions. He was silent and let you speak, paying full attention to you. Xiao loved the silence and peace. He hated when humans would talk for hours on end, it was unnecessary and wasted his time. However, this sentiment didn’t carry on with you. 

He often urged you to talk about your day and the people you met. Xiao does everything he can to coax more of your sweet voice out. Your voice had always been like music to his ears. For you, he could bear not being alone. For you, he was carving out hours of his day to cuddle and listen to you speak. 

That was until everything changed with your adventuring routes. Previously, right after you switched from Mondstadt routes, the Guild had kept you near the Wangshu Inn and around the Qingce Village area. However, due to increased demand for your services, you had been moved South towards Liyue Harbor. The adventures you went on now were much simpler, but much more boring. You’d complain to your boyfriend about how you had to talk to too many people and how exhausting it was for you. Xiao would listen intently and offer a comforting embrace, silently happy that at least you weren’t out risking your life every day.  

His concern began when you moved on from random requests and commissions with different people to a more stable and consistent job. You had accepted a job from the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor as a one time thing, but your skill and agreeability had earned you a more permanent position there. 

Your day to day job was to just assist and protect different members with finding and restoring relics across Liyue. However, it allowed you to move around more and actually engage in combat, a welcome change from before. You had helped the director herself, but your favourite employee to work with was Mr. Zhongli.  He was a tall and serious man, but he was powerful and amusing to talk to. 

The first adventure you had gone on with him, you couldn’t stop talking about it with Xiao when you came home that night. One adventure turned into ten quite quickly as the two of you made a habit of engaging in all your commissions with the parlor together. Zhongli as your companion in travel gave you a sense of stability and a feeling of safety when you were out in dangerous situations again. 

Every night you came back, you told Xiao about the mysterious and strong man’s aid to you. The passion you spoke of his power and of his intelligence in the culture of Liyue surprised him at first. As you kept talking about Zhongli, Xiao started to feel different. He was no longer eager to hear of your adventures because he felt something very strange now. 

Xiao has never felt afraid. At least, not truly. He is not afraid of death as he had accepted it long ago. Yet now you had given him something to live for and losing you would leave him back into a pit of despair, suffering, longing, and emptiness. Seeing you gush over the assistant to the funeral director filled him with a new unpleasant feeling. Heart numbing fear. 

He was careful to not let you know how he felt. He was nervous that you would view him as pitiful for what he truly felt in his heart. Bile would fill up in his throat when you talked about that man as he held your full attention. In response, Xiao would start to capture your mouth with a kiss if he sensed that you’d talk about Zhongli on your dates. It got you to shut up and restored his happiness for a moment. 

He felt guilty for interrupting you of course. Yet, he couldn’t muster up the courage to confront his own feelings of insecurity. The best he could do was try to prove to you how much he could offer. As his kisses began to get more heated, he found it fit to use his strength to carry you back to your shared bedroom. 

Out of curiosity, Xiao decided to actually look at this Mr. Zhongli one day. If he was feeling insecure before, oh man, any self confidence he had was now wrecked. The man was absolutely perfect with you. 

You were smiling and walking through the harbor-city side by side with the sharply dressed golden eyed man. The walk that the two of you had was powerful. The men and women of Liyue whispered behind you two about how cute the both of you were. Xiao silently watched as you two sat at the tea house and drank tea in silence. Zhongli had never taken his loving and intent gaze off of you. The Yaksha took in more of the man’s appearance. He was much taller than Xiao was and carried himself with a royal sort of dignity. As the two of you finished your tea, the man made a move to pay for your tea by charging it to the funeral parlor. He’s rich too, Xiao thinks sourly. What doesn’t he have? He has enough when Zhongli’s resoundingly deep voice tells you how well you fought today. If Xiao sounded like that he would never want to shut up.  

He goes back into his bad habits of distancing himself and retreating back into his own silence. His awful self loathing that you worked hard to remove has manifested itself again and begun lashing out on you. Brushing you off, short snappy responses, and hardly responding to anything. This results in you thinking you did something wrong. 

Oh how the adeptus breaks when he sees you try to make him Almond Tofu and various other small gifts to please him. He knows you didn’t do anything, but all he wants is you to free yourself from him and spend your life with someone who could provide so much more than he could. 

In your shared bedroom, he would be physically present, but he was silent and hardly even looked at you. He could hear your muffled tears at night when you thought he was asleep. It took everything within him to not turn to you and let you lay your head in his chest and leave kisses across your face after he dried away your tears. It hurt him again when he heard you asking Verr Goldet if she could help you plan a nice surprise for him. As he stayed to listen, he had to listen to the innkeeper give you kind words as you broke down explaining what it was for.

All your advances towards his forgiveness and love go rejected. He decides that it would be better for you in the long run if it was like this. He stays cold, at least until he sees something that pushes him back to your side. 

His pity party and moping is interrupted by the strangest feeling in his heart. Something painful crackles and burns inside of him. He’s not sure how he knows, but he feels that something is very wrong with you. 

Xiao was not called the adeptus of speed for no reason. The speed in which he reached you was one he had not used for hundreds of years. 

You weren’t in any life threatening danger, but the bond that you two shared was. He could see Zhongli gently move a strand of your hair behind your ear. You had a more nervous smile on your face. 

“How fascinating, Y/N” his voice breaks the silence, “Your abilities seem to get stronger every day,” he continues praising you.

Your face flushes a light pink and you look down, breaking the gaze between you two. “You’re too kind, Mr. Zhongli, but I wouldn’t have been able to grow so much without your guidance,”

The golden eyed man smiles at this as he leans in slightly closer to you, “In that case, would you like to have dinner with me tonight?” 

Xiao clears his throat as he steps out from the bushes and stalks towards you with a glower on his face. You look at your lover in surprise, not seeing or hearing his voice in quite some time. 

“Actually, she’s already taken so you can take your leave now,” his words filled with venom. He doesn’t even try to be subtle as he holds his emerald spear by his side in warning to the man who tried to make a move on you. 

Zhongli nods, “I understand, sorry for intruding,” as he leaves. Xiao’s watchful gaze not leaving him until he’s far out of sight. Your adeptus moves to your side and engulfs you in a warm hug that he wishes to convey all of his feelings of love into. 

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have treated you like that, it was unnecessary and you didn’t even do anything wrong. Give me a chance,” he seldom begs, “please,” he adds. His golden eyes piercing into your soul and displaying such regret. 

You don’t respond, but you lean closer to him and press your lips softly against his. He forgot how much he missed this. 

Oh how stupid he was for not letting you know how much he adored you known more. Well, now he had the time to make it up to you. He brings you towards the cliffside and the two of you sit down together once more, the bond shared between you too also renewed. 

As you look at him, he lets you lean on his shoulder and look at the sun’s light beginning to wane as the sky was touched with beautiful pastel pinks and purples. 

“I love you, Y/N” he whispers softly as he nuzzles his face into your H/C hair. 

“Hmm, I love you too, Xiao,” you respond sweetly and relax under his presence.

The brown haired Archon chuckled lightly as he watched his Adeptus gently place his arm around your waist. He was happy that the cold guardian had finally found someone to love and someone to take care of him in return. When the time was necessary, Morax was ready to bring a contract to let the two of you spend the rest of eternity together, as two soulmates should. 

a/n Hope you enjoyed it! Leave a like and some feedback, please.

[court-of-forever-undone]

I Knew You’d Come Back to Me

Chapter Two: Slept next to her, but I dreamt of you (Cardan’s POV)

Summary:  While homesick and heartbroken in the mortal world, Jude finds a pile of letters on her doorstep that include an official pardon and a love confession from Cardan. What is supposed to be a happy reunion quickly falls apart when Jude is told Cardan has returned to Nicasia in her absence. 

Cardan is determined to make it up to Jude. 

**This fic is inspired by the love story between Taylor Swift’s characters Betty, James, and August.**

Should you wish to listen: Cardigan | Betty | August

Tags: Multiple POVs, angst and a happy ending, Jurdan, post-wicked king, canon divergence

Masterlist

Read on AO3

Four Months Post Exile

If she has decided that she wishes to stay away and forget about Elfhame, me, then I will forget about her as well. Except that I can’t because for the eternity she has been gone there has been nothing to rid my thoughts of her.

I grab the nearest pitcher of wine, not that they are ever far from my reach as of late, and swallow as much of the tart liquid as I can. At least if I pass out there is a chance I may dream of her, or dream of losing her. But it is a chance I am willing to take.

There is a revel happening, for a reason I cannot remember. Probably honoring some guest that I cannot be bothered to care about at this point. I tend to the kingdom as best as I can for the day, but by the time the dawn is rising I do everything I can to forget the subtle human features that haunt me. The curve of her ear, the flush in her cheeks, the softness of her form.

Since she has been gone there has been an unbearable ache in my chest that only seems to worsen at her memory. I’ve taken back up with a variety of powders that I grew accustomed to at Balekin’s parties. The numbing sensation is highly preferable to the agonizing dread that awaits me in sobriety. At least when time passes differently, I can imagine that she is home again, or at the very least, I can pass more days until she returns.

Her return seems more and more uncertain because despite my letters, she has not come home, nor even responded to them. She has made no inclination that she intends to return, which is ridiculous because she is the queen. When she returns I will have to remember to remind her of all the accusations she threw my way at neglecting responsibilities, meanwhile she has spent months in the mortal world as if waiting for me to come bring her home myself.

I grin at the idea. A trip to the mortal world could quickly end this ridiculous torture. At least I would have the chance to see her in the flesh.

She could get her anger out and then return home with me. At this point, a curse from her lips would sound like music and her fingers curled around my neck would be ecstasy.

In time, that anger might turn to forgiveness and we can all move on from this nonsense.

Present Day

What a dreadful day today has been. I should have returned to my chambers the moment I was given news of a wine shortage because poisoned wine had been found in the castle’s cellars, because that meant I had to suffer through the small council’s bickering mostly sober, followed by hours of grievance hearings from folk. For a kingdom full of people who find me utterly incompetent, they sure do make plenty of pleas to the crown.

Only one hour remains until I can leave the presence of my court and scout for my own wine to drink, poisoned or otherwise.

“Cardan…?” Nicasia said with the air of a question.

I respond with a non-committal sound before glancing in her direction to my left. Again, she had found a seat nearest mine, despite my repeated reminder that she was no longer entitled to that spot. We were nothing beyond friends with a bit of history, even if my entire council, mother, and Nicasia herself thought it was ridiculous to prolong a “land-sea” alliance any longer.

I turn back to the conversation I had been ignoring and make an appropriate response, before quickly tuning them out again. Courtiers have nothing better to do than waste my time.

Admittedly, I could see my advisors’ point and I haven’t exactly fought to deny Nicasia’s advances anymore. Not when the one I want has rejected me entirely, favoring a mortal over me and forsaking our kingdom to my inadequate rule.

If I were a kinder soul, I might have been content to see her happy and adjusted to the mortal world, but I am not. I hate myself for sending her away and I hate her just as much for not wanting to return. Every time someone suggests I marry, I want to scream the truth for the entire kingdom to hear.

I married the mortal Jude Duarte. I did it so she would release her hold over me, but I also did it because I wanted to. I wanted to make her my queen and share this dreaded life with her; the powerful, defiant, occasionally murderous, human woman with all her soft features and perfectly odd ears.

Pride be damned. If she returned, I’d allow her anything. She would never need a geas to command me. She was already a ruler, she deserved the credit. The court would eventually adjust to the idea of a human ruler once they recognized her rule. I would lead the most devoted of her court and in our bedroom, I would further prove to her just how devoted I was by spreading --

Nicasia’s hand sliding over my knee snaps me from my thoughts. The touch of her hand felt sickly wrong considering my thoughts of Jude. I brush her hand aside and purposefully ignore the hurt look on her face. I may allow her into my room on nights where even the wine and the powders cannot bring me peace, but she knows I am far too sober and there are too many people around for that.

At the edge of my peripheral I see a dark shadow approaching. The Roach; always a welcomed distraction usually armed with wonderfully bad news.

“Come to tell me of another attempt on my life?” I murmur as he bows down to whisper in my ear.

“You are needed at once, your majesty” the goblin reports.

At that, I laugh but make no effort to move. “There is a first for everything. What is it?” I am happy to use whatever matter it is as an excuse to leave, but I am curious what requires my attention that the spies could not handle themselves.

“Jude has returned. She is waiting to see you.”

His words hit like the hilt of a sword to the chest. I stand, jumping the courtier closest to me.

“I have matters to attend to. Enjoy the rest of your evening.” I say to no one in particular, trying to ignore the loud pounding in my ears as my heart threatens to beat out of my chest.

I begin to follow the Roach out of the room when I feel a hand on my arm.

“What is going on?” Nicasia asks, her eyes wide. I shake out of her grasp.

“It is a matter of great importance that does not concern you.” Instead of moving away, like my body demands to, I move in closer to her so only she can hear me. “I meant my words in the gardens. Do not show up this evening or any evening again.”

Her mouth fell slightly open as water rimmed her eyes. I didn't stay for her response, instead I turned back and followed the Roach into the tunnel, knowing every step was bringing me closer to Jude. As we stalk through the hallways, I cannot slow the questions bombarding my mind.

Did she decide against her life in the mortal world? Did she miss me as I have missed her? What should I say to her? Will she allow me to embrace her? Should I announce her return tonight?

I have envisioned dozens of scenarios of what I would say or do when she returned, but now that she is only a few steps away I have no plan past seeing her, holding her if I can, to make sure she is real and not my imagination come to life.

We take the final turn that I know leads to the headquarters for the Court of Shadows when Livier blocks the doorway.

“Where is she?”

I watch as her face contorts. She opens her mouth to respond before closing it again, clearly unsure how to answer. I don’t have patience for this. I have to see her now.

“Move Livier,” I demand.

How many months has it been since we had fallen asleep together after our vows? How long has it been that I’ve felt her pressed against me?

“Cardan, wait!” She exclaims as I try to move past her. “She doesn’t want to see you.”

I stop dead at her words.

Before I can speak, the Roach asks for me, “What do you mean? She sent us to get him.”

The pixie nods. “Yes. She went to the royal chambers, but she returned soon after and has stated she does not wish to speak.”

I cannot help the bite to my words. “To speak to anyone, or just me?”

Her silence gives me my answer. “Why?” I spit out.

She is on the other side of the wall. It has been months, what about my room could have made her decide against seeing me? A darker thought crosses my mind; what if she has decided to return to the mortal world again? The idea threatens to break me then and there in the dark tunnels beneath the castle.

Livier looks at her companion with unease.

“Why?” I demand again.

The Bomb swallows before explaining, “When she returned, she asked how long you and the Princess of the Undersea had been back together.”

My desperation melted into cruel pitiful laughter. She was jealous of Nicasia, while she had herself a human plaything. The hypocrisy was grand. I wonder how her face would look when I asked about the man and how she could possibly blame me when she broke our vows first. My laughter quickly fizzled into a frozen anger.

I needed to leave before the weight of the situation could bear down on me. In all my imaginations, I never predicted this. I had hoped she’d run to my arms or more realistically, slap me followed up with a kiss. But never returning and refusing to see me.

I want to beg to see her. Beg for her forgiveness. Beg her to stay even if she hates me.

As a king, I have every right to go wherever I please. But as a queen, she has the right to deny entry to anyone. So I turn in the tight hallway and take the turn that leads to my rooms.

She is home. She wouldn’t see me, but she is home, which meant I could fix this. She might not see me tonight, but I would win her forgiveness and maybe her love too.

****

After almost two weeks of announcements and planning, Jude’s coronation ball will begin soon. I have still yet to see her in person, but through messengers and letters she agreed to rule with me and begrudgingly accepted my proposal for a party to celebrate her return and status.

The actual coronation will not take place for another few weeks due to the time needed to gather all the court’s representatives, but this evening would be a full celebration nonetheless. She is home and that enough is cause to celebrate.

The party will also finally force Jude out of the shadows. I suspect she has moved around the castle quite a bit as I heard she met with her sisters and the Living Council, but she has made a careful effort to avoid me.

There have been several times where I have made it all the way to her door before deciding to leave and giving her the space she demands. For months now, I have had dreams of the moment we saw each other again; I have imagined her vulgar words and sweet touches. Tonight is the last night I can imagine because in a matter of hours I will see her again. For the evening, she will have no choice but to stand in the same room as me. I already announced her as my wife and Elfhame’s High Queen. After this evening, she can avoid me outside of official business, if she wishes. It would be devastating, but no more devastating than how it felt when she was gone.

I pace back and forth in my chambers thinking through all the details of the evening since I have nothing better to do. I dressed long ago in a suit twin to the dress I had sent for Jude. If I thought the last dress I designed for her was stunning, I am not sure I’ll be able to survive seeing her in tonight's creation. I gave the tailor a sketch of a silver gown with a fitted bodice and twin streams of fabric that flow from the shoulders. The hope was to create an illusion of the armor she seemed to favor. I doubt the tailor will disappoint and frankly, Jude could wear an old sack and still be devastatingly beautiful.

Before long I receive the signal to head to the ballroom. As I enter the room, I admire for the first time the servant’s efforts to fulfill my image for the evening. The decoration for a typical revel was nothing compared to the fanfare visible this evening. Long strings of lights and streamers hung from the ceiling and sweet and savory treats of all varieties are piled high on trays. The musicians and other entertainment for the evening are already in full swing keeping the guests happy and amused.

As is customary, the party has been going on for some time now, before the king and now queen enter. The center of the space is filled with revelers dancing and singing. At any other party, I would have gladly joined, but I cannot help the pooling sense of unease as I glance through the crowding looking for a particular face.

I do find the face I am looking for, but not the right person. Taryn is standing on the side of the dance floor chatting with some courtier. Locke is nowhere to be seen, which is for the best. If I notice him even causing Jude to frown this evening, I will have him locked in the dungeons for the night.

I occupy myself with some wine while I wait and use the opportunity to boast of Jude’s brilliance to anyone who decides they wish to speak with me. After about a dozen of these conversations, I finally catch a glimpse of her walking into the room with Vivianne at her side.

My Jude.

I admire her with total abandon. She is absolutely stunning. The movement of her steps causes the fabric to shimmer as it flows obscenely over her body. While I will imagine her in this dress for many nights to come, it is the crown that sits atop her head that captures my attention.

The crowd cheers at her arrival and many bow to her. While she keeps her emotions well concealed, I can see the smallest of smiles appear on her face. She enjoys the recognition. Seeing her now, if I could have given her this from the start I would have.

My heart-stopping queen.

I stay to the side where I am and watch her enjoyment from afar. She dances with her sisters from time to time and speaks to members of the gentry with ease. I know she has noted my presence, even if she has yet to look in my direction. When it is time to address the crowd, it is my turn to avoid her direction. I keep my speech to the folk short, enough to praise her and remind anyone who may be considering treason exactly who Jude Duarte is. At the final toast, I steel myself before addressing her directly.

“Welcome home, Jude.”

Our eyes meet for the briefest of moments, burning with a million unspoken words before she breaks away and turns to address the now-growing crowd around her.

It was the first time she acknowledged me since the morning I sent her away and suddenly the emotion behind that realization hits me all at once. I let my eyes linger on her turned back a moment longer, before downing my drink and disappearing into the gardens to wallow in my own self pity.

I told myself I would be happy if she just returned home, but now I realize how badly each moment I spend away from her aches. In school, I hated the way I longed for her. I had chalked it up to being a disgraceful obsession; one I would have been glad to be rid of whatever that meant for Jude. Now, I am equally obsessed with my mortal queen, but rather than having just my thoughts occupied with her, I feel a feral desperation to be near her, to set things right with her.

It is not uncommon for me to be followed, but when I hear soft steps behind me, the last person I expect to turn and see is Jude. Her brown eyes widened in surprise, as if she was not the one following me. We both stare at each other for a half a second too long, before Jude mumbles something and turns to leave. I take her by the arm before she can take a single step away. I won’t let her get away a second time.

“Ask me how hideous you look tonight,” the words tumble from my mouth before I can stop them.

She turns back to face me. I loosen my hold on her arm, but let my hand linger until she decides to brush it away.

“This again?” She asks, sounding more tired than annoyed. I didn’t realize how much I missed her voice.

Desperate to hear her again, I reply, “I can’t. You look like a knight from a story tonight.” A filthy story, perhaps.

Jude’s cheeks pinken as she shifts away from me. If I wasn’t afraid to lose her, I might have found her unease at my closeness cute.

“I’m glad to see the kingdom is still in one piece.” Jude acknowledges, changing the subject away from her. The distance between us feels infinitely greater than the foot of space physically separating us. I’d give anything to embrace her now.

“I had help,” I state simply. It is the truth. The Court of Shadows kept tabs on everyone, friends and enemies, and the Living Council for all the headaches they cause me, they did their job as well.

“Nicasia?” Jude didn’t try or simply failed to hide the accusation in the question.

I sigh heavily and take a seat on one of the garden’s benches. “Ahh that. Yes, it is about time we talked.” I motion for her to join me, to which she refuses.

“I don’t want to hear anything about the two of you. I understand we married out of political strategy, I won’t hold you to human standards of monogamy.” Jude echos my sigh, “After your letters, I thought… Well, I misunderstood the situation.”

My core twists at the way her voice trembled on the words. When did her pain stop being cruel amusement and instead became a twin knife that hurts us both?

“I meant every word in those letters” I murmured softly. How many times had I imagined this conversation before?

Anger burns across her face, “So, what? You got bored of waiting for me to return from the exile YOU-” she jams her pointer finger into my chest hard enough to bruise, “ordered! Maybe next time make sure your letters are actually delivered or perhaps don’t send me away in the first place.”

I stand, challenging her anger with my own. “You think I wouldn’t have waited? I went to bring you home. I saw you dancing with the mortal. Don’t pretend I was the first to stray.”

I expected more anger, denial perhaps, but not... confusion?

“What the hell are you talking about? I haven’t been with anyone else,” Jude yells exasperated.

“The blond male. I came to see you and…” I trail off when Jude laughs suddenly. “What could possibly be funny?”

She covers her face with her hands, shaking her head side to side, “Cardan, you saw me with a friend. Nothing ever happened between us, ever.”

Shame washes over me like a tidal wave. I had returned from that trip thinking Jude had made her decision to forget me and stay behind. I had walked straight into a revel and drank every drop of wine in sight. Nicasia found me a few hours later laying in the grass outside the castle and when she came near I did the one thing I thought would make me feel better.

Nicasia had been the first to notice me, my first real friend then lover. After Jude, I thought she could be the thing I needed again, but I was wrong. It didn’t take long for me to realize it would never be as it was before because my heart still belonged to Jude. If I had only spoken to Jude that night in the mortal world, none of this would have happened.

“I believed the reason for your continued absence was because you were still mad. I thought I could go to the mortal world and convince you to come home, but I saw you with the mortal man. I did not handle the thought of you with another well. Nicasia was there when I got back and… I let her into my bed, but it was you that I thought of every moment you were gone.”

Several emotions ripple across her face before she quickly schooled her face into the impenetrable mask she wears around others. She wears around me too. I continue before the fear of her rejection can stop me.

“There are no tricks within my words, so please hear me when I promise you, Jude, mortal High Queen of Elfhame, it is you I love. My heart is yours and forever will be. There will be no other’s, and if you choose to have me again, it will only be you.”

I raise my hand to cup her face and watch as her eyes flutter close. My name falls off her lips like a plea and I think it might be the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard. I lower myself to meet her soft lips. Her hands soon find the front of my jacket and I don't fight when she tugs me closer to her.

Without breaking the kiss, I use my free hand to grip her lower back and pull her back into the garden seat with me. On my lap, Jude opens herself up to me and I greedily take in more of her, missing the taste of her. I can’t help but continue to caress her body with my fingertips, long after we break to catch our breath. I place a series of kisses along her neck, each more drawn out than the last before I speak the cruel fact still on my mind, “of all my terribleness, the worst thing I ever did was what I did to you.”

It hurts knowing I can speak those words aloud. I reach up to wipe a stray tear that has fallen from her eyes.

“Will you have me again, Jude?” My heart pounds in the wake of the question. I watch as she considers it. Truthfully, I wouldn't blame her if she refused me, but it would be torturous to have her so near and not mine.

Slowly, she gives a subtle nod and I don’t hide my sigh of relief. She stares at me for a second longer, before smiling, “I love you, Cardan."

I capture her lips again, finding her more addictive than the sweetest wine.

“My sweet nemesis, how glad I am you have returned.”

Tag List: @wafflesandschemingfaces​ 

If anyone else would like to join the list, let me know! 

[fieryhonesty]

Genshin drabbles filled with sadness - Kaeya, Diluc, Xiao

“What have I done? Why did I write such angsty stuff? I feel horrible for hurting the boys. Maybe I should have delete this...”

prompts: loosing their s/o for whatever reason, f!reader

Genre: angst 

Warning(s): nsfw (alcohol consumption, mention of blood) don’t give me that look you don’t want to read this at work, depression & mourning, reader’s dead (no violent or detailed description the boys just lost their girl)

Kaeya has poured two glasses of wine. One for him and one for the woman sitting next to him. She was smiling with the most genuine smile. Pointing up at the sky. The moon and the stars were shining bright. He didn't need any other light source to see her beautiful face.

Just the two of them sitting at the balcony of their shared house. Silently observing the beauty of the night. Drinking from his glass, the sweet-bitter taste was dancing on his tongue. It was as beautiful as the woman he was spending the time with. 

"You know, you are really beautiful tonight, y/n. How about I take a day off tomorrow just to spend it with you?"

No answer.

"We could go on a walk around the city or perhaps go outside the city's walls?"

Yet again, silence.

Kaeya finished his glass with one quick motion. Pouring more wine. The burning sensation in his throat was slowly reminding him something.

"Hey, Dearest. Why don't you talk to me?" 

Silence. 

"Ah, you are right. I'm... a fool."

He starts laughing. It's not a laugh a happy man would have, it's quite the opposite. Kaeya's in pain. His chest hurts, he knows why but dares not to admit it.

Removing his eye patch and tossing it on the table. Looking at his smiling companion. Why is she so beautiful? He is such a lucky man, having somebody like that. So why is he feeling this pain in his chest? Why does he feel like his heart will burst?

The glass with wine shatters. The shards are covered in the red liquid. He closes his eyes. Trying to force the tears to stop forming. Biting his lips. It hurts so much. His hazy memories are slowly reminding him what's going on. 

Just like a movie it all flashes back in the moment you were standing between him and the enemy. Blocking the hit for him. Falling to ground with a painful scream. But before that you managed to look at your beloved. He is safe, you did well. 

He stares in horror at the scene. Wishing it's just a bad horror he is watching. This can't be happening. You didn't waste your life for him, did you? If there was somebody supposed to die it's him. He made a mistake. A mistake which cost him you.

Kaeya is silently sobbing, one hand hiding his face while the other is gripping his attire at chest area. He is sure nobody can see him, yet he still feels like to hide. He might be drunk but he knows the woman next to him is just an illusion created by his own mind. There's nobody at all it's just him and the wine. 

You are no longer alive. It's all because of him being cocky that day. He was full of himself and so sure he will keep you safe. In the end he lost his remaining pride and you...

Diluc is walking in circles. Biting his thumb while doing so. It hurts, he can taste blood but nothing hurts more than his heart right now. Sweat is forming on his forehead as he is trying to suppress his tears. His shoes are making loud thumbs against the wooden floor. The sounds can be heard in the room under his. 

Everyone is silent in the room. Elzer, Adelinde, the old man Tunner and a few more. Listening to noises from Master Diluc's room, yet nobody dares to let him know he is loud. It would be more than rude. Especially now when he has to deal with yet another painful experience. 

First he lost his father and several years later he lost his wife. He was finally happy. Having you by his side was a blessing. You were there for him whenever he needed and he did the same for you. Feeling down? He'd be there cupping your face, planting butterfly kisses on your face. Snuggling you close into a protective embrace.

You did something similar. Playing with his hair when he was snuggled to your neck. Brushing through them, tucking them behind his ear. Saying soothing words. He would fall asleep like that.

But now? You are gone. Your sudden passing away affected the whole manor. You were liked among the maids as you often joined in small talk or offered to help them. Despite their protests it's their job. You didn't mind it.

Old Tunner and folks from vineyards remember how you often walked around. Caressing the grapes or bringing some snack.

Simply put. You were the star which was shining bright for everyone. Lifting their spirits and now you are gone. Everyone is mourning you but none can think of how much he is hurt. 

When Diluc heard about your critical condition he rushed to see you but doctors didn't let him. You needed to rest but your body was weak, they knew you won't make it. In the end allowing him to see you for the last time. Holding your already cold hand. 

He sat there for minutes, until you left him all alone. He didn't move, doctors had to lead him out. Somebody had to pick him up and bring home. He laid on the bed, one hand over his face. Trying to keep his tears away. 

Nobody dared to knock on the door. Not even Elzer who always worried about his young Master. Trying to offer some kind words. He knew his words would be useless now. All he can do is just wait. He knows if he goes his Master will be out of control and won't listen to anything. 

It's just another painful hit for Master Diluc. He thought he would be happy finally. Already had plans for the future with you. Everything is pointless now. Why does life keep taking his beloved ones from him? How much more he has to suffer…

Xiao is silently sitting at the top of Wangshu Inn. The cold wind is caressing his hair. He is observing the distant horizon, how the moon is slowly going up. His mind is blank. If he were a mortal it would be probably clouded by negative thoughts. 

He has no feelings or need for them. He is one of the mighty Adepti, there's no room for stupid things like feelings or emotions. At least that's what he tries to keep repeating to himself. 

Mortals come and leave out of his life. Which is only natural for their short life span. He wouldn't be bothered with it at all. But there was a woman who managed to change him. Showed him what those odd feelings in his chest are. She proved to him he has feelings and emotions. He was just suppressing them his whole life. 

Perhaps it was all for the better. He feels lonely. Usually it would be the two of you sitting here. You would be nudging him about random things. Snuggle onto his shoulder, whispering some nonsense. He would look at you and see those shiny, beautiful eyes of yours. 

He remembers when you fed him with his favorite dish. He was confused at first why would you do it. Explaining to him it's something people in love would do for their partner. Take care of them. He tried to feed you too, it was a clumsy attempt. But you appreciated his efforts.

You showed him so many nice things he could see only from mortal's eyes. He understands some things he couldn't before. All because of you. But what's this feeling? Regret? No. He does not regret letting you enter his life. He regrets being too late. 

Before he could do something you were already gone. The demon which attacked you. That sneaky bastard avoiding his watchful gaze. It dared to assault somebody he thought of as a close person. Taking you from him just as if bonds are nothing. 

When he arrived you were possessed by the demon. Its power went out of control, destroying everything around. He tried to talk to you but there was nothing left, just agony and darkness. He could see the suffering in your face. You didn't want to. You never were a violent person, yet now you are destroying everything. 

For the first time in his life Xiao felt anger was taking control over him. He wanted to eradicate all demons. For what they did all those millennials, for what they did just right now. He knew you will eventually die and leave him, he was fine with that. But he never thought of losing you like this.

He has to do his duty as a Yaksha, the Liyue's protector. Pointing the tip of his spear at your throat. He stopped only because you tried to talk. The words coming out of your lips were just gibberish. 

"Farewell, y/n. I'm sorry."

Ending it just like that. Watching how the blood was leaving your body. Feeling sick from the sight of it. He released you from the agony the demon was causing you. Banishing it as it tried to escape from your dying body. There's no demon safe, not from Xiao. He will continue his duty.

But one thing is certain. He will always feel lonely at night as he got used to your presence. You will remain in his heart forever. Always will have that special place as a foolish but lovely mortal, daring to approach him despite all of his fame as a Yaksha. The cold he feels right now bothers him. Just if you could be there...

[green-socks]

Endless Nights

Pairing: Benny Miller x gn!reader (no descriptions or pronouns)

Summary: You and Benny can't seem to get enough of each other's company. Could tonight be the night you find the courage to do something about that crush?

Words: 2,101

Warnings: Nudity but not the sexual kind, food/eating. Almost zero editing and a tired writer.

Notes: I don't always participate in Writer Wednesday, but when I do I take one look at the picture, get an idea and then go completely off the rails. Sorry. So the pic doesn't really have a lot to do with the rest of the fic but I hope that's okay. For this week's @autumnleaves1991-blog Writer Wednesday, thanks for organizing it every week!

I had the idea for midnight shopping at the supermarket with Benny and then realized I didn't want the night to end there... So it didn't. I actually like this piece, even if it probably suffered a lot from my fast writing and non-existent editing. Reader is mentioned having shorter legs than Benny but other than that I think there are no descriptions or pronouns used of reader, lmk if I'm wrong.

MASTERLIST

You and Benny have been driving around aimlessly for a couple of hours already, taking turns in picking the music, and talking about this and that while sometimes falling into a companionable silence. It still amazes you how easy and comfortable everything is with him. You have never felt like this with a crush before, used to the feeling of always obsessing over what you felt like you could and couldn’t say or do, or spending a lot of time and energy into trying to figure out what the other thought.

No, with Benny you don’t have to pretend anything or force yourself to keep the conversation running in fear of those horrid awkward silences, because both of you know that you can talk for hours on end when the mood strikes. You met through mutual friends only a few weeks ago, but the connection was clearly there. As was the obvious mutual attraction.

Strictly speaking, though, you and Benny are just friends. Nothing has ever really happened to indicate otherwise in any case. But friends don’t usually try this hard to find any excuse just to hang out, nor do you stay up late every night talking to your other friends. And when you hang out in a group you always seem to gravitate towards one another. What’s more, somehow it always seems to be just the two of you left at the end of the night, often not even noticing the others leave.

Your interactions always border on the line of obvious flirting with your touches and already formed inside jokes, but neither of you ever dare do anything that couldn’t be brushed off as innocent behavior between friends. You guess you’re both just kind of scared to take the leap - you have been burned before, and so has he.

It’s not that you doubt your own feelings for Benny, or indeed his feelings for you. Even you have to admit that he does seem pretty interested in you, but you still wave away your friends’ squeals of “he’s totally in love with you!”, mainly not wanting to get your hopes up too much.

Because a small part of you still finds it a little hard to believe; someone so handsome and funny and kind wanting to be with you? What if he likes you, but just not as much as you like him? What if you were just a second choice for someone you really like until something better comes along - again? That scares you, both of you.

Tonight has been like many other nights lately; you had been to the movies with some of your friends, but after the movie ended you had been grasping at straws to come up with a way to continue the night so they (Benny) wouldn’t go home just yet. Benny had helpfully suggested just driving around and seeing if any ideas came to mind.

Santiago in turn had rolled his eyes at you two knowingly (making both you and Benny fluster and try to fake complete nonchalance) before saying good night and leaving with the others, who apparently didn’t feel the compulsive need to continue spending time together.

--------

The sun has gone down already but you two are still enjoying each other’s company too much to go home yet.

You end up in the 24/7 supermarket parking lot, craving a midnight snack. You are reminded of your teenage years, when you used to hang around different parking lots, popping into the store to buy a soda or a candy bar, spending all day outside with friends.

The only other customers doing their midnight shopping are tired people just off their shifts or young people staying up late just for the hell of it, much like you and Benny are, in fact. You wander around the huge store together, pointing out different products you’d like to try and reviewing stuff one of you already has tried.

Before long you realize that you have already spent almost forty minutes idly wandering around the supermarket, collecting new soda or chip flavors to test. Neither of you thought to grab a basket at the entrance, so your arms are starting to get a bit full.

“Benny, do you think this might be enough?” you ask while struggling to maintain your hold on the different bags of chips.

Benny looks back at you from where he is pondering over whether to get some ice cream. “Huh, I guess. I do still wanna get a sandwich, though!” he exclaims and promptly takes off in the direction of the deli counter where they sell sandwiches and salads left over from the day.

You try to keep up with his long strides, certain that you must look a bit comical half-running after a man with your hands full of treats. Oh, well. Benny often complains about how much focus it requires of him to “modify his steps” to fit your much shorter legs, and he always forgets about it when he gets excited.

When you catch up with him, he has already picked a sandwich for himself and one for you. “I got you salmon, that’s your favorite, right?”

“Yeah, thanks!” you say a little breathlessly after your speed-walk, taken that he remembers.

As you finally get to the cash register and start loading your stuff in your bag you see Benny sneak one more candy bar among the rest of your purchases. For someone in such good physical shape he sure does like his candy.

“Where to next?” Benny inquires as you get back to the car.

“Hmm, how about this one waterfront type swimming spot? It’s pretty secluded, has a pier, and there’s a nice view to the sea. I sometimes like to sit there on the cliffs to watch the sun go down,” you suggest, and offer him directions to the place.

It’s a short drive and you show Benny where to park his car. Even though it’s somewhere around 1 a.m. and the sun went down hours ago, the night is still light enough that you can easily see where you’re going and it doesn’t feel like you’re just sitting in the dark.

You settle down on the small pier with your sandwiches and sodas and chips and munch away happily.

Benny hands you the candy bar you saw him grab earlier at the cash register “for dessert”. It has a cheesy text on the packaging about giving this to someone special. He grins and shrugs, “I know you love these”.

It’s such a simple gesture but you can’t help feeling really flattered and even more smitten with him than you already were. You don’t read too much into the text on the packaging, but even the fact that he would buy you a candy bar he knows you love - just because - warms your heart.

(What you don’t know is that the candy bars have lots of different texts to choose from, and that Benny specifically picked “give this to someone special” instead of “give this to a friend”. There was also “give this to someone you love”, but Benny worried that might scare you off.)

--------

After you’re both done with snacking you try to think of what to do next, still reluctant to pronounce this night to be over, you get an idea.

“You know what I would really like to do right now?” you ask Benny, looking out over the water that looks so tempting. “Go swim,” you announce, turning to look at him.

“You don’t have a swimsuit with you, do you?” Benny asks, turning to look at you too.

“No… But there’s no one here,” you point out with your eyebrows raised in challenge.

Benny looks at you for a few beats with a blank expression on his face, before shrugging “Alright,” and throwing off his hoodie and t-shirt, jeans following next. “What are you waiting for?” he shouts over his shoulder as he jumps from the pier into the water.

You’re left sitting there with your mouth open, blinking rapidly as you try to catch up with the fast turn of events. Shaking your head, you stand up and shrug off your clothes before quickly running after Benny and getting into the refreshing water.

The night is still warm, and the water feels wonderful. You swim to catch up with Benny.

“You know, it’s pretty dark here but I’ve basically seen you naked now,” he remarks, waggling his eyebrows, and you snort with laughter.

“Benny, you’re not allowed to make me laugh in the water or I’ll drown,” you try to say sternly.

“Oh sweetheart, I wouldn’t let you drown,” he answers in a surprisingly serious voice.

Suddenly the energy between you is full of.. something. Something new and buzzing, sort of scary but also exciting. Something you can’t quite explain. You’re swimming around each other, looking at each other intently, but not daring to say anything that would break the moment and burst the bubble.

Someone else does that for you.

A couple of teenage girls, you’d guess around 18 years old, stumble on to the pier and immediately notice you two in the water. The other girl lets out a shriek and tightens her hold on the towel around her, and before you can even try to reassure them that everything is fine, they run off giggling and shrieking some more. Evidently, they had had the same idea for a nighttime swim but found the place already occupied.

“Yeahhhh, maybe we should put some clothes on before someone calls the police,” Benny suggests dryly.

You two climb out of the water giggling and grinning broadly. You don’t have any towels with you since you didn’t exactly plan this impromptu skinny-dipping session, but Benny gives you his hoodie to help keep you warm.

Sitting back down next to Benny you’re even closer together now than earlier, ever so slowly inching closer and closer to each other. Both of you think you could pass it off as huddling for warmth if the other were to question it, but somehow you know that won’t be an issue.

Soon enough you’re snuggling together on the waterfront overlooking the sea. You stay quietly like that for some time, maybe fifteen minutes, maybe more. It’s hard to tell when the world is so still and quiet around you.

Suddenly you think that this is it, this is the moment you’ve been waiting for. In all honesty you sort of enjoy the pining stage of new relationships, but right now you feel like you might burst if you keep these feelings inside you any longer.

You turn and burrow your head into the crook of his neck and decide that you will have to take the leap now. You start pressing gentle kisses on his neck and hear Benny’s breath hitch at the first contact of your lips on his skin. He goes still as a statue, but you can feel more than hear his unsteady breathing at your actions. You’re practically vibrating with nervous excitement as you work your way up to his jaw and towards his lips.

Taking one final deep breath you close your eyes, not daring to look at Benny in the eye right now, as you bring your lips to meet his.

The kiss is sweet and unhurried, and yet your head is swimming and your whole body is buzzing with it as you melt into each other. It’s unlike anything you’ve ever felt, which just proves that everything really is different - better - with Benny. You pull away when you find yourself quickly out of breath just from feeling so much.

You finally dare to open your eyes to find Benny gazing at you with a dazed expression that surely mirrors your own and you slowly beam at each other, not feeling the need for words just now. Maybe you couldn’t even find them if you tried.

You settle back against his chest and the two of you stay like that for the rest of the night, sometimes spending long moments just kissing each other, sometimes talking quietly, sometimes just enjoying each other’s presence.

--------

Around five in the morning, when the sun is already getting up, you finally start to really feel the need for sleep. But this time it doesn’t feel wrong to leave and go home, since you’ll be going home together.

Later that day you wake up to a good morning, sweetheart in Benny’s arms where you fell asleep on his couch, tired but happier than you’ve ever felt in your life.