#not even thinking of the result im just thinking abt how this is the last ever game as a dragão for god knows how many of my boys

[gibbearish]

its been fun watching the hbomb subreddit try very very hard to stick to the "if anyone harasses james on my behalf they wont see the light of heaven" by imo overcorrecting to "any time anyone mentions somerton ever it's because you're obsessed with him and want to pick on him because he's the villain of the week" bc its like. yknow actually i dont think people keeping an eye on his various attempts to weasel back into the spotlight and keep doing his same old shit over the last /two months/ is the same as harassing him because it's hip and fun. i think maybe those are not the same thing

[elektroblues]

btw everything was going swimmingly whrn i was being an offline girlie until i was talking abt ethel cain and yellowjackets to my classmate and she got all 🤨🤨🤨🤨 abt me mentioning cannibalism Twice in one conversation and i rmr. oh wait i sound insane in the real world

[givemethedamnflowers]

I had the extreme honor today of saying "he's our spider george" and to be understood it was amazing

[arolesbianism]

Hi guys guess who's literally shaking rn from excitement

[maiteo]

hoje temos a taça de portugal…

[sturnsslut]

better - matt sturniolo

a/n - this is a filler until i’m done with my chris smut 😔. i’m sorry there’s a lot of yapping but the backstory matters !

contains - soft dom!matt x sub!reader, fighting (barley), unprotected sex, mirror sex, praise, fingering, begging, oral

summary - reader and matt make a bet !

————————————————————————————

‘ i seen your love, you got me baby ‘

it was a friday night and my boyfriend had just canceled on me last minute for the 3rd time this week. i was literally all dressed up, waiting for him to come and pick me up. i sighed when i read his message saying that he " had something come up "

bullshit.

i had a feeling he had been cheating on me for a while, but i didn't have any solid proof so i just stayed quiet. i was about to get into my pajamas when i got a text from nick saying how theyre having a party at their house tonight , and how matt would pick me up.

nick 💗

HEY

we're having a party tn

can you come

pleaseeeeee

matt can pick you up

i feel like i haven't seen you in forever

you

nick it's been 4 days 😭

but i mean

let me see

i pulled out my phone to text liam, my boyfriend . i had to make sure that we really weren't going out , so i was just double checking.

liam

Can't go

Something came up

you

bro what ??

im literally ready

why tf is this just now being brought up

liam

I don't know what you want me to do lmfao

you

im going to nicks party then

liam

Says who?

Your staying at the house

you

why are you being weird 💀

yes i am

lmfao ok dad

liam

That fucking matt kid

Your always looking at him

And he looks at you like he's

in love or some shit so no your not going

you

bro

u can't be serious

i never look at him

liam

K well

i don't want you close enough to him

so that there's even a chance something could happen

you

k.

read 10:39 pm

i laughed and rolled my eyes, he really thinks he's in control of me...i scrolled back to nicks contact and texted him

you

come get me 😝

nick

YAYYYY

we're like 5 mins away

can we come in so i can say hi to ur cat

you

omfg 😭 yea

im ready anyways cause

ofc my bf cancelled on me again

nick

girl.

you can do better

i feel like everyone knows

he's cheating on you...

you

yea me to

i just don't have any proof yet

anyways lmk when ur here

nick

okay

we're like abt to pull up

you

doors unlocked 😛

i waited until i saw their van in my driveway, and opened the door watching them walk up to my porch

immediately hugged nick and chris, but i just smiled at matt and he returned the gesture.

there had always been something, weird between me and matt. it wasn't friendship, but it wasn't hate either. it was weird.

i led nick to my room and picked up my cat, kiko, handing her to him

i walked out of my room to see chris sitting on the couch and matt just leaning against the door on his phone, like he couldn't wait to leave.

“uh you know you can sit down matt...” i said awkwardly, causing him to look up from his phone and just respond with “i know”

i shrugged it off and went back to my room where i'd left nick, and asked him what he thought of my outfit.

i asked him if he thought it was ' too formal ' for a party since it was originally an outfit for my date.

i was wearing a short black dress with spaghetti straps, my hair down and some light makeup

“girl you look hot. don't change” i smiled and went to the bathroom to touch up my makeup a little, once i was done i grabbed my bag and asked nick if we're ready to go “you ready?” i questioned, putting my bag on my arm

“yeah let's go” he said before saying bye to kiko and putting her down

“come on guys” nick said walking out of my room, resulting in everyone making their way to the door.

once we got into the van i was in the back , with nick while chris and matt were up front obviously. on the way there, i just had the urge to look up from my phone

i looked up and caught matt starring at me through the rearview mirror, he immediately looked away once he saw me though.

we eventually got to the triplets house and it was already packed. we all got out of the van and while we were making our way to the door, i asked nick “you let all these people here without you guys home?”

“yeah, justin and nate are here so it should be fine.”

i hummed in response and walked behind nick and chris, with matt behind me for some reason.

nate opened the door and dapped up matt after i walked in, and i heard him say “hot date bro”

“she's not my date” matt replied sounding slightly annoyed. nate raised a brow in confusion

“then…why..were you walking behind her? and starring at her ass, like, the entire time you were walking up…me and justin literally saw you through the window.”

i turned my head around for a quick second to see matt shushing nate and punching him (sort of) playfully on the shoulder

i felt my cheeks heat up, but why? why did i care how matt was looking at me? whatever.

i made my way to the kitchen where nick and chris were, we just gossiped about random shit.

nick was talking to chris and while i waited for my turn to speak, i looked around and saw...my boyfriend? what? he said he had an emergency?

and of course, he was making out with some skanky bitch from my school who knew we'd been dating.

i told nick i'll be right back and made my way over.

“fuck you. family emergency?? your fucking unbelievable.” i shoved him then faced the girl “and bitch as for you, he's gonna do the same shit hes doing to me right now. you aren't gonna fucking last.”

he looked totally wasted and was slurring his words, but i heard him say “you were just a good fuck. get over it.”

i looked at him in disbelief for a moment before i said something back “can't say the same for you. you have a small dick.” and with that, i walked off.

tons of people were starring at me of course, but i was too mad to even care. i made my way to the bathroom to calm down, before i heard a knock on the door.

“what the fuck do you want” i blurted out without even thinking who it could be.

“um..it's matt, can i come in?” i instantly covered my mouth feeling bad about how i had spoken to him

i unlocked the door and opened it, letting him in. “i'm sorry. i didn't know who it was” i apologized

“no no, it's okay. i just wanted to check on you and see if your okay.”

i sighed and sat down on the toilet seat while he leaned against the wall in front of the mirror

“i mean..not really, just pissed at how much time and energy i wasted on him.”

he stayed silent and didn't say anything, waiting for me to finish what i was saying “i knew he was cheating but i didn't wanna believe it, i feel fucking stupid” i continued

“your not stupid” he shrugged and continued “he's stupid for loosing someone like you.” i thanked him and sighed, resting my head in my hands

“and…if he has a small dick he's nothing to cry over” he smiled

i laughed, “he wasn't even good in bed either oh my god.” i added and laughed

"really?” matt turned his head to look at me, furrowing his brows for a second and smiling, while crossing his arms

“yeah. sorry if this is too much but like..i never finished when i was with him” i giggled at the embarrassing confession

he laughed and paused for a moment before saying “you would if you were with me”

i giggled thinking he was joking, and replied with “doubt it”

matt raised his eyebrows and locked the door, “wanna bet?”

that's when i realized he wasn't joking, i stood up and leaned against the sink infront of him " how much " i smirked at him

“ $50. i know how to use my hands, mouth, and dick. im confident i could make you cum, that's a promise.”

“fine, prove it then” i said nodding my head

“don't start shit you can't finish. im serious.” he said looking me in my eyes

“so am i, i wanna see if you can put your money where your mouth is”

“ y/n ,” he said smiling and shaking his head , leaning into me, resting one of his hands on the sink

“matt.” i responded teasingly

he grabbed my hand and placed it onto his dick, making me feel his giant boner

“you see what your doing to me? i will fuck you until you can't even remember his name.”

“do it then” i smirked, ' he's all talk ' is what i was thinking, until he firmly placed his lips on mine

it was quick to turn sloppy, he picked me up and set me on the edge of the sink so i was perfectly aligned with his dick

he started making his way down slowly by leaving hickeys all down my neck, i wrapped my fingers in his hair and tugged it slightly, but not too hard

that's when he lifted up my dress and placed one of his hands on my waist, while the other rubbed my clit through my underwear

he was looking me in my face but i was so needy for more of him, that i couldn't even look him in the eyes.

“what? you can't take it anymore?” he smirked at me, still making eye contact and then inching his hand fully down my panties sticking two fingers inside me

(guys i giggled at panties but i didn't know what other word to use)

i bit my lip slightly taking a deep breath in at the amount of pleasure i was in. even tho all he did was tease me, it felt amazing. like he had this power over me.

he started moving his fingers slow, but picked up the pace fast. i threw my head back in pleasure, while my hands grabbed at his shoulders.

fuck. maybe he could make me cum after all .

as good as it felt, i needed a break because if he fingered me for any longer, i would've lost $50.

i grabbed his hand and pulled it away and hopped off of the counter, immediately getting on my knees

i began to unzip his pants when he suddenly stops me and grabs my chin, raising my head and making me look at him

“i don't know if your ready..” he said looking at me with a smirk

i rolled my eyes smiling slightly, and continued undoing his pants "okay..." he answered, throwing his hands up in surrender

i pulled his pants down to his ankles and then looked up to see his boxers, and i could obviously see his giant print

i pulled down his boxers , revealing an easy 9 inches. i started at it for a few seconds before shrugging and shoving in 6 inches or so

as i switched between my hands and my mouth, i swirled my tongue around his tip causing him to let out a low groan

“shit ..” he threw his head back in pleasure and grabbed a fistful of my hair, pushing himself further into my mouth

i felt it in the back of my throat. i heard him mumbling all types of swear words, and at that point he's basically just fucking my throat

“how was that” say standing up to face him, smirking up at him still catching my breath

“your really good” he smirked at me, before picking me up and setting me back on the sink again “your turn”

he pulls out of the kiss and bends down slightly, resting his hands on my inner thighs, spreading my legs a little

“let me do this for you, all you need to do is hold your legs up. but if you can't handle it, just put em on my shoulders, okay?” he says looking me in my eyes, all i could do at that point was just nod eagerly, hopefully showing how bad i needed him.

and with that, he starts to go down on me. i arched my back unintentionally, i don't know what came over me, but i couldn't help myself. it just felt like he belonged there

this man wasn't lying when said he knows how to make a girl beg, not even close to a lie.

i grabbed a handful of his hair and arched my back again when i felt him start to suck on my clit

i slapped my hand over my mouth, remembering how there's other people around.

he took his hand off of my thigh and removed my own hand from my mouth, “don't cover your mouth sweetheart. i wanna know if im doing good”

i shook my head in agreement and grabbed the back of his shirt, needing some sort of support

i can't explain it, but i swear i felt him smirk when i grabbed him, like he knew he was pleasing me so good.

i never knew i needed him, but i do now. his tongue felt so good on me, it just felt right.

i moaned slightly louder than before “shit…” i threw my head back and bit my lip slightly

i started whimpering out of pleasure trying to catch my breath, his tongue was going everywhere and somehow he made every spot feel amazing .

i felt myself get close, but i needed to feel him inside of me. “wait wait wait” i mumbled trying to catch my breath

“what is it baby?” he said looking up at me “ i…fuck hold on.” said panting

“ i want you to fuck me , please matt.” i said in between breaths

“how bad?” he said smirking at me and looking me in my eyes, “tell me how bad you want me.”

“i need you so bad, please” i pleaded, i just wanted him in me and nothing else, him and him only is all i needed.

“good girl.” and with that, he fully stood up and grabbed his dick

he held his tip up to my entrance, running his head up and down my folds causing whimpers to leave both of our mouths. he knowing how bad he was teasing me, but this man was rock hard.

“matt, i want you to fuck me and i know you do to , stop teasing please” i was literally begging this man to just destroy me

he shrugged “i'll try not to stretch you out too much sweetheart.” and with that, he pushed himself inside me without warning, and wow i wasn't ready.

it's like i was so horny i forgot how big he was.

he shoved all of his length inside me , all 9 inches. i cried out in pleasure

he placed his hands on my waist so he could go deeper and guide me , “oh fuck” i muttered and immediately clamped my eyes shut

that's when i felt matt's hand on my chin, making me look at him. “look at me, i wanna see how good i make you feel . do i make you feel good, pretty?”

“mhm” i whimpered and shook my head because i couldn't even speak.

“use your words baby. do i?” he spoke firmly, still not breaking eye contact

“yes, yes you make me feel good” i mumbled

“good.” he spoke in a fierce tone as his tip hit my g-spot perfectly each time, making me throw my head back

i heard him say “hey baby, you wanna take off that dress?” he suggested

i nodded while he pulled out and i hopped off of the sink, slipping my dress off

i looked over at matt who was literally starring down my body, “what?” giggled getting flustered

“nothing…you just amaze me. your body is so perfect” he said, still starring me down

i laughed and rolled my eyes and asked if he was ready again, “for you, always. are you?” he emphasized

i bent over the sink and replied “obviously.” he snickered and grabbed my hips, making sure he was perfectly aligned.

i felt him pound himself into me, which, i again for some reason still wasn't used to how big he is.

i had my hands on the sink for support, and when he put himself inside me, i put my head down because it felt so good

that's when i felt matt's hand on my chin again and lifted up my head , looking at me through the mirror.

“uh uh. i want you to see how good your taking me.”

i nodded looking at him in the mirror

i watch him look down and smile while furrowing his brows

“you didn't tell me you had a back tattoo baby . it looks good”

“you never ..” i paused as i struggled to get my words out “shit!...asked me” i whined, almost too loudly

“fair enough ..oh fuck” he threw his head back and his thrusting started to get more aggressive

his hand crept up to my neck, placing a firm grip on my neck which sent me over the edge

“matt..baby i can't do it” i said shaking my head while looking at him in the mirror

“yes you can, take it like you said you would.” i nodded and did as he told me

i suddenly felt that knot in my stomach, so i reached behind me and grabbed matts hand from my waist and put it on the sink so that his hand was over mine, and we interlocked our fingers

“you alright? are you gonna cum already? come on, your too easy to please baby .” he asked in a teasing tone, looking at me and smirking

like of course i was. and he obviously knew, he just thought that it was funny to tease me.

“fuck ..matt im gonna-“ i was cut off by me releasing onto his dick, “oh shit” said looking down, i was relieved that a man had actually made me finish, but now i needed to give matt $50 i didn't have ...

“good job baby, you did great” he was literally panting at this point. i could tell was close, just trying not to show it.

i decided to tease a little and see how long he could last.

“you make me feel so good baby” i said looking at him in the mirror

“thats g..fuck” he threw his head back and starting thrusting harder

“you look so good from here” i teased a little more since he thinks when he does it, it's hilarious. i saw him open this mouth to say something but instead just bite the side of his cheek and stay quiet

“i don't care how long it takes you baby, my body is all yours.”

“fuck .. mm oh shit ...in or out”

without answering, i got on my knees and began to jerk him off to his release while looking up at him

“oh shit. fuck..fuck” he lets out a huge loud of cum and i swallow, i dont need a mess.

i get back up and try my best to fix my hair while looking at myself in the mirror, while matt's leaning against the wall panting

i pickup my shoes without even bothering to put them back on , i just re-adjust my dress and forget about everything else.

my hair is all out of place, my lipstick is smeared, my mascara running down my face..i was a mess. but it was totally worth it.

i sit on the toilet seat while matt puts his pants back on.

“i don't need the $50.” matt said suddenly smiling at me, “you ready? you still look good by the way.”

“whatever. let's go” i laughed and rolled my eyes, opening the door

“liam's gonna be so pissed.” i laughed looking back at matt

“i know” he smiled “can't wait to see the look on his face.”

i giggled as we made our way over to liam, who was making out with a different girl.

we stood infront of him and looked at eachother laughing, and as soon as we did we opened his eyes and looked like he'd just seen a ghost

“hi” i said in a teasing voice, tilting my head while doing so

“what the fuck?” he looked back at me and matt in confusion, furrowing his brows like he didn't know what was going on.

“yea so you were kinda right about me and matt ...” i said trying not to burst out laughing

“you fucking whore!” he yelled, gaining the attention of tons of people. they started recording the situation because of how loud he was. “i knew you were cheating on me you slimy little b-“ he got cut off as he got sent to the floor.

matt had punched him.

i covered my mouth in shock but also resisting the urge to not laugh “your...” liam paused , feeling his nose as it gushed blood everywhere “dead.” he continued

“okay, well it's kinda hard to take that threat serious when your on ground”

everybody around us started laughing, apparently nobody liked liam , but it's obvious why.

“your not a real man! y-“ i cut him off before he could finish his sentence, “well he fucks like one. get up and get over it. truth hurts.”

i pat his shoulder and flashed him a faux sympathy smile, before he swatted my hand away causing me to laugh

we walked over to chris and nick who were recording everything on their phones “hey uh, are you guys ready to pack this up?” matt asked them

“yup, i'll get nate and justin to get everyone out.” nick said as he walked away

“dude what the fuck ...” chris giggled as he looked at me and matt " i fucking knew it! nick owes me $20".

“you..made a bet?” i asked, confused

“fuck yea we did” he replied stuffing his mouth with food before walking off

“so like..do you wanna be my girlfriend...or whatever” matt asked me, looking down at the ground

“duh.” smiled and kissed him before going to find nick so i could help clean the mess up

“we're literally never having a party again.” nick complained as we all shoved trash into trash bags

a/n - um lmk if you wanna be on my tag list 🤗.

@mattssluttygf

[faerghusfucker]

BALL FELIX AT LONG LAST

sorry this guy took a little while lol, school’s been kinda nuts but i’m getting into a groove with my work so i should be able to draw more consistently

so felix does NOT want to be at this damn ball lmao. he would much rather take advantage of the empty training grounds and do swordplay to his heart’s content, BUUUUUUUT sylvain made a deal with him that if felix joined him at the ball for a while, he would leave early with him to spar. and come on, what good is training without a sparring partner (even if he’s an idiot), so felix agreed.

part of this deal was that sylvain would get to force him into help him with his outfit, since if it were up to him felix would just wear his school uniform and have that be the end of it. obviously the rest of the house heard abt this arrangement and they all had a nice time in sylvain’s room getting ready and it was super cute im sure. mercedes and annette are both super enamored with his long hair i think, and annette worked her magic and got felix to let her do his hair, resulting in his lil do with the flower (which is actually gonna match the flowers on annette’s dress but oooooh you’ll have to wait for that one)

i’m gonna make a masterpost for this blog just to get organized, i see this more on writing/fanfic blogs than art ones but i wanna do one anyway bc a) i wanna start doing more writing on here along with art and headcanons b) i do a lot of reblogging here and general shitposting so i wanna make sure the posts that i actually do put effort into don’t get buried. so yay for that! thanks again for all the love on here recently, im happy my hyperfixation is fun lol

bonus full lineup bc i love how little felix is lmao shoutout to short kings

[writingmeraki]

unsaid, unkept, ugly emotions.

a seventeen hip hop unit imagines !

IN WHICH, the uglier side of feeling too much getting more messier than it already is for both parties involved.

(or in which for different reasons, it just seems you aren't meant to be.)

pairing : svt!hiphop!unit x gn!reader, friend's crush!seungcheol, best friend's other best friend!wonwoo, rival's friend!mingyu, rockstar! vernon.

genre : angst, no comfort. ( for now )

warnings : mentions of injuries, inaccurate basketball terms, cussing, messy, heartbreak, contemplation, arguments, miserable people, miscommunication, everyone gets hurt, a lot of unspoken feelings, like emphasis on that you may get annoyed. ( not proofread ; we die like hyyh yoonkook )

author's note : i tried so hard to make gyu's messy but i just couldn't ( you'll find out ) these plots are soo random and specific pls but so funnn to write! also me uploading this much is trying to make up for very less updates for the last months of 2023. I missed milestones and I want to make up for those soon too! gahh anyways let me know what you think of these, im actually nervous abt this ngl ( also i just noticed soo much friend drama oof-)

VOCAL UNIT VER. | PERFOMANCE UNIT VER.

word count : 4.1k ( they are getting longer...)

ᯓ★ | seungcheol.

He was off limits.

From the moment you knew your best friend, Haewon, had a crush on him, he was not supposed to ever be in your radar of romantic boundaries as per the rules of being a best friend. 

Seeing her going crazy for a boy like him at first really made you question if there was something wrong with you because you just couldn’t quite see it.

Sure he was literally the definition of tall, blonde and gorgeous. Sure he had adorable dimples that made him look less intimidating than you thought he initially was. Sure he was also the frat president as well as the captain of the soccer team making you wonder how he was able to still balance getting great grades.

Well. There was a slight possibility you could see what others saw. 

Maybe even more when the time you tried to play wingman for Haewon at a party where you lost her because apparently she was looking for him but said guy turned up right beside you as you were contemplating on what would least likely not kill your liver if you had it resulting in having conversations about cherries ( you don’t even know ) and him trying to convince (gaslight) you into soccer being one of the greatest games of all time. 

You didn’t get convinced but for the time it felt right to agree to what he said if it meant those adorable dimples would show up when you did. 

You were so screwed. 

Another thing Choi Seungcheol had was a great memory, because he seemed to remember you when he saw you walking down the hallway with Haewon as he smiled so widely at you in greeting. 

“Haha yeah hey! um…This is Haewon by the way! Haewon, Seungcheol.” You had to nudge her to snap out of her daze and she extended her hand in greeting as he politely shook her hand. 

“That reminds me, I forgot to ask you last night but uh can I have your-”

“Oh would you look at that! We’re getting late for class! I’m so sorry Seungcheol, we’ll have to leave!” 

That moment you think you were so going to hell when you saw how quickly his smile fell and how his sparkly eyes dimmed down because it felt like you committed a sin then and there. You think you saved yourself from committing a sin but it didn’t feel less dreadful as you grabbed her hand and rushed as quickly as you could.

In the opposite direction of where your class was.

“WHAT WAS THAT-”

“Listen- when you were looking for him last night- I swear I don’t know how but he was right where I ended up sitting and he-well, we talked I suppose-?”

Her eyes widened at your words and you raised your hands in surrender, 

“I promise I didn’t even know when he showed up, I tried to message you and even find you but you seemed gone until the moment we were leaving.”

“Plus the reason I didn’t tell you last night was I was tired! I was here trying to play wingman while the person in love was seemingly gone-”

She sighed and nodded at you, “You don’t have to explain, I know he’s not your type, you made that clear a lot of times actually it’s kinda hilarious.” She giggled as she recalled the countless times you chastised her for daydreaming about him. But now, you couldn’t stop the stupid tinge of bitterness in your heart.

Right. Not my type. 

Suddenly her eyes widened as an idea struck her, “That’s it! He was gonna ask for your number right? You can try and set me up then!”

“I well- I don’t know-”

“Please! You know how I have been trying to get to know him even.”

You didn’t want to say it then but you thought about how trying meant actually doing something rather than just gazing from afar. At least become friends with him was the words you told her countless times but she paid no heed, retorting how it was not that easy.

But it was easy because what’s the worst that could happen? Him having a partner? So it wasn’t the end of the world, others existed! 

Too bad you were easy to persuade, questionably easy because all it took were her doe eyes pleading at you to agree.

“Fine- I’ll try- but no promises.”

As she hugged you and squealed words of gratefulness to you, you couldn’t quite put a finger on it then but, 

You didn’t understand why it felt a part of you couldn’t seem to share the same happiness, conceivably a lingering dread there that knew something was surely going to go wrong.

✮⋆˙ | wonwoo.

Everytime Jeon Wonwoo had the ever so unfortunate ( according to him ) time to exist in the same room as you, it seemed like an impending doom for him. 

His heart felt weird, his stomach dropped, his throat parched.

He hated it. 

He was an individual who knew what they wanted in life. Never unsure nor second guessing, always able to classify their emotions in proper ways. Systematic is the right word. Able to know what exactly he wants to do in his career, how to behave with his friends, when to be serious and when to have ‘fun’. 

So what happens when you completely throw him off the rocks with your mere existence?

He hates you. That’s how he tags the emotions he feels when he sees you and what does hatred sprout? Indifference. 

Too many questions asked but it’s what Wonwoo declares. 

Though, he thinks the first mistake is to think he’d be able to avoid you considering the fact that you were his best friend/roommate’s good friend. Meaning you spent around twenty to twenty two hours at their place (Yes he counted) and he absolutely hated it.

He hated how your giggles would ring out in the entire apartment when Mingyu said a half-assed joke, it literally made his chest feel uneasy. He hated how your eyes would always twinkle when you would be talking to Mingyu, it made his stomach drop and sigh in disbelief. 

Was Mingyu that oblivious to how much you liked him?

Now this was a question that made Wonwoo almost throw up. Odd.

“You know if you don’t make a move, he won’t even know right? I know you think he’s one of the smartest but in the romance field, I think even fucking Jihoon beats him at that.” 

Or perhaps Wonwoo was just very oblivious to how much you liked him. 

You shook your head at Mingyu’s words as you both walked up to his apartment, the butterflies in your stomach already churning at the thought that Wonwoo was likely home. 

“And also it’s getting concerning how much time you spend in my apartment for the sake of him, like at this point just move in you creep—HEY!Ow!— that hurt you ass!”

“It’s not that easy,Gyu,he’s – he’s Wonwoo for God’s sake!”

“That’s exactly why it’s easy! It’s Wonwoo! Be direct with him. I’ve known him for years and trust me, he won’t know until you spit it out to him!”

Maybe…maybe he was right. Afterall he had been friends with Wonwoo before even knowing you.

“What if he doesn’t even feel the same–”

“Be serious. He literally looks like a lovesick fool when you’re over–”

“Maybe he’s just sick of me coming over.”

Mingyu stopped walking and you didn’t even realize until you were a few steps ahead. Pausing when you finally saw he wasn’t beside you.

His expression was like he was close to ripping out his hair from frustration while also being flabbergasted. It was kinda hilarious and you had to gulp to prevent laughing because you were sure he might just kill you.

“Okay! Okay, fine– I'll listen to you– maybe not confess today! But I'll ask if we can hangout or something,happy?”

“Very.” 

You rolled your eyes at his words as you both began climbing up the stairs, telling him to shush with his teasing as the tips of your ears began to feel warm and the blood rushed to your cheeks with every scenario you imagined.

Maybe if you thought that the upcoming scenario would ever occur. it would have hurt less. 

As you waited for Mingyu to pull out his keys, you could feel your nerves igniting through your skin and your stomach churning. But before Mingyu could insert the key, the door opened.

You wouldn’t have questioned anything, if it weren’t for the obvious messy hair, hickey marks trailing down her exposed neck and of course, the star of your daydreams right behind her, standing with a surprised face.

It was obvious what had occurred, the confirmation lying in the bruises on his neck. 

“Woah–uh.” Mingyu stuttered awkwardly, and you could feel his sympathy as he glanced at you. You couldn’t think of anything else other than how…right you were and how wrong Mingyu was.

You didn’t know who she was but it wasn’t her fault. Or anyone’s. Maybe yours. So as a weird tension simmered through the air, you looked away from them and just turned to Mingyu. 

And for the first time in his life probably, he was lost. Jeon Wonwoo was lost because why did he just feel like he committed a crime when he wasn’t even yours anyways?

He hated the way you looked away, not missing the hurt that flashed across your eyes as you realized what he probably was doing. 

You didn’t even notice she’d already left, smiling at Wonwoo and signing him to call her back, again. Probably not the first time, you thought.

“Uh-Gyu- I’ll go now, It’s getting late for me anyways,”

You really tried to stop your voice from cracking, the lump in your throat making you want to choke and die then and there. So you just looked at Mingyu, purposefully ignoring the way he looked at you in sympathy. 

His stare seemed to burn into your side profile. The words on the tip of his tongue, but what? It all felt like a lot but nothing at the same time. Wonwoo didn’t know what to say. 

Nodding goodbye to Mingyu and glancing at Wonwoo, offering a tight lipped smile as you waved, and then without saying anything you turned around. 

Mingyu frowned. His best friend couldn’t own up to his feelings for you and just when you were about to take a step forward, he somehow ended up fucking it up completely. 

What a mess. 

“Come on, we need to talk.”

Mingyu said seriously, putting an arm over Wonwoo’s shoulders, albeit a little forcefully which caused the other boy to almost stumble over. 

It seemed it was now up to him now to sort out this mess and hopefully it doesn’t get worse from here.

✩₊˚. | mingyu.

Being the new captain of the basketball team had its perks. Sure, you now officially got tagged as a ‘jock’, a title in itself that held its own benefits, probably more than just when you were another player in the team. 

But its disadvantages seemed more at the moment when you found yourself under the angered gaze of none other than Yoon Jiwoo. Another player of the basketball team. Shooting guard was the position.

By all means, it wasn’t your fault she was not captain, it was her own actions that did not get her the position. And plus, it wasn’t like it was bad not being a captain, Yeri was a small forward, yet probably the best one at it. So it was at the end of the day, nothing to you but just more responsibilities with the title. 

Plus, it was also voted by the rest of the players that you deserved to be captain this time when it was time to appoint a new captain. Jiwoo had been a captain before Lisa became that year, but she left and so there had to be a new choice made. 

With Jiwoo’s unfair hatred towards you, also came a similar animosity from her group of friends. Well you think Jiwoo wants them to share the same feelings as she does but you doubt they care enough, usually neutral towards you or sympathetic even as they tried to reason her animosity being useless.

They were five or six if you could remember correctly from the times they’d drop her to practice or come to pick her up sometimes. Apparently one of them was her cousin Yoon Jeonghan and you could surely see the similarities in them from the way unrealistically attractive they both looked. 

But the one that stuck out most to you was Kim Mingyu. Her best friend. And the one who supposedly hated you the most, after her that is.

Then why did he feel anything but hate? He couldn’t stop looking at you during your practice when he stuck around to wait for Jiwoo, as if in a trance as his gaze remained on you.

He couldn’t stop the way his heart sped up when you grinned so widely as you scored, tackling your teammate in a hug. Why was he suddenly envious of the people who got to experience your joy? 

In his defense, he liked you way before you were even captain. It was probably since the day he first saw you try for the teams and he thinks it was fate that he got to stumble onto you that one sunny afternoon. 

You were nervous for your trials and he was nervous from the way your hair prettily rested on your cheeks and made you almost glow in the sun. Yeah, he was convinced it was love at first sight.

Though he feels liking his best friend’s rival was…confusing. He didn’t know if he could take a side or if he should even question taking a side. 

“You pushed them on purpose Jiwoo!” Yeri yelled at her as she held you upright. You couldn’t even make out some of the words as you focused on the pain shooting up your ankle from the way it twisted. 

“We all saw it, stop acting like you did nothing!”

“Exactly, you have this weird hate boner for them since you couldn’t get your stupid captain title!” 

You were sure the first voice was Chaewon while the other was Yeri.

“Why are you all ganging up on me? It wasn’t on purpose! Ask-ask someone else as well!” Her voice got louder and louder as she finished her sentence. She didn’t expect people to take your side. Although her plan was just a little shove to keep you off balance as she got the ball in her hand, she did not expect you to twist your ankle completely. 

“It’s fine- just- just leave it. It was a mistake, I just-” Your words were cut off as you hissed out in pain again as you attempted to get up, only to tumble down again, luckily held up by Yeri and Chaewon.

They sat you down on the bench as they huddled around you in a panic. You pulled off your shoes, scrunching your nose from the smell but the pain quickly took your focus from that.

 “Hey! What’s going on?” You heard someone say as they entered, their voice familiar to you. Mingyu had come to pick up Jiwoo as usual, not knowing she left sneakily when they were focused on you, when he saw everyone huddled together, confused when he couldn’t see you amongst the first few he saw. 

He didn’t need to peek over due to his well…giant form, but he saw you sat down in the middle as he got closer, caressing your leg. His eyes widened when he saw your ankle swollen up and an angry red shade that was definitely not natural.

“Shit that looks bad.” You looked up and you swore you thought you were hallucinating. Because no way was Kim Mingyu out of everyone looking at you with nothing but worry and concern. He still looked…good. As always. Per usual. You think you got distracted from your pain for just a minute as you stared at him for a few seconds, him seemingly not noticing as he kept his eyes on your ankle.

“Blame your girlfriend.” Yeri scowled as she spitefully retorted, as Chaewon dug her elbow into her side to which she yelped and glared at her. 

“Girlfriend?” He turned his attention towards her, resembling a confused puppy as he raised an eyebrow in confusion.

“Yeri.” You spoke up firmly before she could say anything, looking at her with a look that told her to keep her mouth shut,not wanting to make this a bigger scene than it already was. She sighed and rolled her eyes, ultimately not saying anything.

You moved your leg around for a bit, deciding you should give it a go again to stand up, and drag yourself to the infirmary. And when you did stand up, it seemed you really overestimated yourself or perhaps underestimated your injury because next thing you knew you lost balance again.

But lucky for you, instead of landing right on the wooden floors and having a blistered lip, you landed right on Kim Mingyu. It only occurred to you now just how much taller than you he was when his whole form almost engulfed you.

“Woah. Take it easy, you’ll get hurt more.” He had wrapped one hand on your waist while the other held your arm. You think his touch burnt you more than anything because you felt yourself begin to warm up. 

“How about I take you to the infirmary? Sorry I didn’t say it sooner, I was just confused on what Yeri said and-”

“It’s-uh-it’s fine- I’ll go by myself-”

“Are you crazy?! You can’t even stand!”

You blinked, taken aback by his words, even more so with just how concerned he seemed,his eyes glistening with it. 

Kim Mingyu was someone you thought you knew but apparently you did not because a few minutes later, you found yourself being piggy-backed by him to the infirmary as he was scolding you about taking better care of yourself. 

You tried to reason that Yeri and Chaewon would take you but they both were adamant on Mingyu taking you, while they would go and look for a certain someone ( You prayed they would not be kicked out of the team).

His grip on your thighs, his shampoo that you could smell, his shoulders that were just so…so broad you couldn’t even fully wrap your arms around them…just him felt so overwhelming. Your pain was long forgotten as you tried not to freak out over how you were currently feeling over him.

But with the way he seemed, the way he acted, was it wrong to assume that perhaps, there was a possibility these feelings weren’t so one-sided?

Well, only one way to find out. 

₊˚⊹⋆ | vernon.

They say people shine their best when they are in their element doing what they love. But to you, Chwe Vernon shone even in the dimmest lights as he sat down in front of you.

It was just a few minutes before their gig. Him and his friends ; Jungkook, Mingyu and Eunwoo from what you remember, were all a part of an upcoming rock band. They were actually gaining more fame as time passed and you were proud to be one of the few who witnessed their growth from the beginning. 

They began from your small bar right in the downtown area where you worked as a bartender, you remembered their first performance, you were told it was their first gig actually. Now they are close to being signed up by a company, still wanting to perform one last time at the place where it all began. 

To you, he was the boy you’d always admire from afar, knowing there was no actual probability of him seeing you in that light. Even now, considering their gaining fame, you’d see the type of people that would swoon over him, even a few celebrities and models you remember. 

He was…a star. Far away and admirable but never in your reach. And stars are better to admire than seek anyways.

Though, it seemed your star wasn’t that far away from you as you thought. In fact he was much closer to you than you could even comprehend. 

In other words, Chwe Vernon was head over heels from you. Since the first time he performed and spotted you when you were busy serving drinks, since the time you told him how great they performed as he sat down in front of you while you talked about what interested you, your eyes gleaming under the dim bar light. And he thinks it was very much obvious what felt when he saw your wide grin, dimples poking out as you finally served him his drink. 

Whisky wasn’t something he liked, but you had recommended a certain combination with it and he thinks nothing else tasted sweeter that day. 

Sadly everyone around you but you saw that. Too focused on how you weren’t ever going to be a possibility because you thought he was just unattainable instead of thinking of the probability of just how much he may have liked you. 

“Nervous?” You smiled at him as you finished setting up the remaining glasses for the night, ready to serve knowing it would be a very busier night than usual due to them performing. 

Yes, yes he was nervous but not because of performing but because he was about to confess. 

“Haha- yeah- no! I mean uhm no- we’re- we’ll be fine.” He wanted to cuss at himself for stuttering, probably looking foolish, but he thought it was fine when he heard your giggle as you shook your head. 

“Oh you are. You’re already the best and I assume and hope it’ll only get better from now on.”

With you. It would get better with you because anything feels better with you. 

He wishes he could say it out loud, but maybe soon enough. That is if you don’t reject him. Yeah he doesn’t know what he’ll do if you do. Throw up probably. Or die. Dying seems good actually, he thinks. 

“Vernon? Here.” He snapped out of his thoughts as he blinked, looking down at the drink in front of him, confused because he didn’t order anything.

“On the house, from me. It’s my favorite drink actually. I-uh hope you like it.” He thinks even if you served him garbage he’d still be delighted, extreme but meh it was close to how he fell for you. Extreme and down bad.

“Oh then I’ll love it for sure.” Because I love you. 

Your grin grew wider as you were about to say something, you heard your name being called by your co-worker.

“Oh- I’m sorry I have to go now! I’ll be here when you perform for sure! Good luck!” 

“It’s okay, you’ll be here afterward.” 

You looked at him apologetically as he shook his head, knowing you were just doing your job and nodding to you to go, to which you waved goodbye at him. 

Perhaps you really underestimated your own words because apparently you couldn’t make it there. You were called by your mother who had gotten sick at home and needed someone to take care of her. 

You thought about whether you should inform Vernon but figured it wouldn’t be too much of a big deal, telling your co-worker to let him know in case he asked afterwards but you doubt he would, probably exhausted after the long night. You forgot your co-worker was switching shifts mid-way with another one, one who would obviously not know your whereabouts. 

And now as he got ready to sing the song he’d written for you, for you with very obvious lyrics about you, the moments with you, he searched for you but…you were nowhere. 

You weren’t there. 

Did you find out? Did you know? Did you think it was too much? 

All the questions arose in his mind as he shut his eyes and breathed in to calm himself. He couldn’t lose his cool on stage when there were so many fans waiting for him to perform.

He looked at his bandmates, and shook his head, not wanting to look at them again as they looked at him sympathetically.

“That’s it for tonight! We hope you continue supporting us in the future! Have a goodnight Seoul!” 

He said and this time as he felt anything but content, his heart heavier than ever and mind in a haze. 

Maybe in this lifetime, you’d both remain two separate stars. Far and never-crossing. 

all written works as well as images and edits (unless credited) belong to pri. do not plagiarise, repost, re-edit or claim as yours. pics mostly found on pinterest.

writingmeraki Ⓒ 2024

feedback is always appreciated 💌

links : main navi ! | svt masterlist !

[nart-is-a-monster]

The following post contains people hating on a character on a skirt and a brief mention of sa and unaliving, please if any of those is something that triggers you skip the post and take care of yourself.

lets begin with the boundaries that i have

I do not feel comfortable with minors going to this or my nsfw acc simply because, is not a safe place for you to go (not even social media too but that's a different talk)

I do not like people going into any of my acc's to send my draws or content to minors bc... bitch do i even have to explain how fucked up that part is?

And last but not least; if you're going to talk shit about me at least talk shit with bases and evidence, how do you not have the first and most important rule about gossip? like??????

booooo tomatoes tomatoes tomatoes tomatoes tomatoes tomatoes tomatoes

I will not name anyone that was involved because first of all,they are minors and even tho they are old enough to know that what they're doing is wrong, naming them could do more harm than good and I think they are able to change if they just accept that their actions have consequences.... I'll be also using neutral pronouns for the ppl involved.

if you know the ppl that are in the screenshots please don't share their social media or acc's to avoid them getting harassed, also please don't harass the people mentioned here.

with that being said!

this situation has been happening for i think the last month when someone informed me about someone talking shit about my art on a private discord server.

I think that the concept of blocking blogs that have stuff that you're triggered or you don't vibe with is very simple to understand.

the persons that have been talking about how i don't draw normal stuff and how dare i to draw varian in a dress and being cute ohh no god forbid....

I don't know if you can't realize maybe I'm drawing Varian (A CHARACTER THAT DOESNT EVEN EXISTS) as trans masc and trans fem, and that anyone can have their hc and any hc are valid!

IF YOU DON'T LIKE WHAT I DO OR DRAW JUST DON'T FOLLOW ME ¡is that simple!

the situation with the person who is the owner of the server where they talk shit about me has not moderate well the place and allowed ppl to hate talk about a creator who they don't even know, neither talk to, nor they should interact with.

I tried to confront the person by sending them a text message on tumblr, said text message has been ignored and the person simply uploaded a new post back then, so....

also im going to tag this with vat7k bc the problem happened inside the fandom.

screenshots and more details under the cut

how to respect other people's boundaries

aparently y'all need a tutorial

"A certain kind of guided, detailed writing can not only help us process what we’ve been through and assist us as we envision a path forward; it can lower our blood pressure, strengthen our immune systems, and increase our general well-being. Expressive writing can result in a reduction in stress, anxiety, and depression; improve our sleep and performance; and bring us greater focus and clarity."

this is from an article of harvard that explains how writting helps to heal trauma.

remember to inform yourself before talking or using terms you don't know the meaning

trauma bonding definition

what is destructive criticism

I can accept criticism when it comes from a place of pointing out a part of my artwork that can be upgraded or a different technique i could use, or even the pose or the technical aspect of a painting/drawing, what is literally just insulting an artwork because you don't like it and have no grounds for it and is just hate... that's what i don't accept.

criticism and arguments come from a ground of respect from the both sides, not from only straight up hate and disrespect.

that's all i have to say abt it all...

please remember to be safe online and even more if youre a minor

how to be safe online

[amaya-143]

hello. part two of me ranting about the fear of memory loss in isat. is it that obvious i have autism?

part one was about the kings fear of forgetting. Go read. *clicks my fingers like a cat* go.

disclaimer not a psychiatrist blahh blahhhh u get the idea :p king rant was long, this will be longer. maybe one singular person is as normal as i am about this game and will enjoy. otherwise at least its out of my system and into words

So yeah, the king is afraid of forgetting. Siffrin, however, is afraid of being forgotten.

Siffrin, is late 20s, and just like the king lost the majority of their memories to the island.The people they loved, all that jazz i don't need to write the cinematics again. They too end up in an unfamiliar place, however they end up a rouge. They travel from city to city, never staying anywhere solid, never making any real connections for years (at least as far as we know.) To him, he is just a guy* who lost everything that they knew, and that's that. No point if it'll just happen again. In fact im not even sure if they're aware they're from that island, since I'm pretty sure he learns it ingame. He just exists. Thats it. Their life doesn't matter, doesn't impact anyone. He is forgettable

But then, they meet Mira, Odile, and Isa. Then Bonnie, and when things couldn't get more confusing, he loses an eye for them. The party loves Siffrin, even if they never say it pregame. They appreciate him. And even if Frin doesn't think it directly, they definitely subconsciously believe it pregame. Otherwise, it wouldn't be such a shock when odile says they're colleagues at best. So how can Siffrin go back to his old life? A life on the go, with no connections, nothing but the millisecond bumps into strangers and polite conversations with the clerk at the hotel desk. Nobody to come home to, no one to ask how their day was.

Its like trying chocolate after eating coco beans all your life. Maybe you can tolerate going back to coco beans for a bit, but you'll never forget the chocolate. It'll be something you think about all the time, your thought before sleep takes you, as tiktok would say your 'roman empire'.

So Siffrin cannot let them go back home. He wishes to stay with them. and thus, the loops happen.But after a bit he, quote, 'understands the king more than he'd like to'

He refuses to be forgotten, to have to go back to that life. They've lived the span of their memories being so blindingly forgettable, now someone, some people see them and its so close in his grasp. Isabeau is so close to confessing to him. Mirabelle is so close to her full potential as a housemaiden. Odile is accepting she's more than her roots. And Bonnie, the kid he lost an eye for, disabling him permentantly, HUGGED them. a massive deal for a fella whos been living off small talk and avoiding eye contact for the last 10 years. Just one more loop, if they do it all right then just maybe..

Not here to talk abt the loops. moving on.

After all these people who love him, they don't wanna be forgotten. Trauma isn't just a factor in disorders. Trauma can, and often does create its own reactions. For a real world example, Children who grow up with absent parents often react with avoiding and distancing tendencies, where as children with emotionally unstable parents tend to grow to be anxiously attached to those they love. These aren't disorders, but they are a reaction to the trauma faced and ingraned. Frin's fear of being forgotten is just as much a trauma response as it is a result of the way he lives. Who knows how many people Siffrin forgot in the island. What's stopping him from being like them? What's stopping him from being so forgettable.

Side note, act 5 is next to the Sunny vs Basil fight as my favorite two scenes in games, especially when it comes to imagining/reading about them in other characters povs other than the mains. And bigfrin is my absolute joy in the world. not sorry.

But after loops n loops of trying to prevent it, hearing off handed comments about how bonnie hates them, and how isa will say i love you to anyone except him, Sif's self worth is at an all-time low. They just don't have it in them anymore. They cant do it. we're looking at months of living the same two days over and over. Same lines. Same people. Same events. Years, if you're an insane person who does like 500+ loops. I think most people did like 70-150 though. Siffrin has been reliving this for so long he's begun to find comfort in it. It feels safe. Its boring, its insufferable, yes, but its SAFE. After suffering all those months, they're leaving anyway. They are going home. They will go home and forget Sif and it will all be for nothing. When Odile stops them from looping back, they strike. Either at themselves, or those they love. They would literally rather attack those they've gone through months of suffering just to spend more time with, or attack themselves time after time till it kills them. They'd rather it than risk them all leaving and forgetting him. I don't really have much more to say i guess i just ugh

i love act 5 i love bigfrin and if theres any writers reading this write some act 5 from other party members pov and you will get the juciest kiss.

if you read all this way, congrats!! i diagnose you with autism 💜

*guy is used as a unisex. i know the correct term for siffrin is fella. i went to gender school.

[strab3rr]

ive been thinking abt a week? to delete my account or my story but u know what idgaf anymore because its just gonna give those people more courage for accusing me of being a liar

oh u dont know what im talking bout rn how cute

I was in the hospital til 2 days ago. as a patient. and i believe this happened bc of some jealousy bitches (or im just bein a drama queen)

ik it sounds like im blaming someone but irl yes i do blame someone

in dog years i blame those bitches

last week? i dont even remember what the day

mom got sick again but its okay shes fine now and then i had a car crash🪩🤩🪩my phone died in the crash literally died i had to buy a new one do you guys have any idea abt how much are this things in my country i really dont care abt the money but be for real wtf actually

i answered all of your questions carefully and with kindness i tried to be there for you guys and the moment i tell you abt my success story i had an accident! um sir wtf am i really being dramatic rn? cause ive been thinking bout this for days and theres no other explanation even if there is i cant see

so here it goes,,, i was just chilling in my home and then i read a dm about a girl that she wants to get in her void and as always i explained how she can get in but she kept ask me about how to get in but like girl hellooo i literally told you how. r u kidding me is this a social experiment to evaluate my patience? and then i said to her that this is the only thing that she should do for getting into

she said, no you are lying it cant be like this! bla bla

i transformed to this cat at that moment this is real me now.

anyway at the end of that conversation she said that im lying, if any of these(my manifestation results) are true then i should show her bc she have "doubts🎀" aww for her doubts i should reveal my self in her home bc she have doubts🎀 i should transport there with my void and show her how to do it irl thats what she asked me no- thats what she commanded me to, she was like "do it" and i was like "what😃" i said no ofc what do u want me to say, ok lets do itt lets break my privacy togetherrr let me get in your void for you and again let me do make your dreams comes true yayyy itll be fun right😍😍😍

i dont even know what to say to that

maybe this?

u think im joking which ur right bc i am

but its kinda serious here buddy what should i say to you when u command me to get in your void for you, like how can i reject you and still be that kind sister for u?

anyway i said no to her and she said im a lair and i broke her heart with my selfishness(then i blocked her ofc)then i go out w my friends this is the part i got hit by a car😇

opened my eyes into the white light like im a mf drama movie character

while im in the hospital i thought i can delete my account and can get rid of this bad luck/shits once and for all but again its just gonna give those bitches courage and they think that they right

"loa is a cult and everyone is a liar bc they cant prove bla bla" dont u dare to blame me for your failure

you didn't got in AND you want me to do it for you???honey im sorry for your loss bc it seems like you just lost your dignity yeah we just buried it u missed such a precious moment🥲

and guess what i have nothing to prove you i literally dont have to prove anything to you. like for real. if you dont believe the story can u just move on please? bc i dont give a damn shit about your insecurities, your doubts and ur blablabla

its literally on you girl BC IT SUPPOSED TO BE YOUR MF REALITY? LIKE DO YOU REALLY NEED A MANUAL BOOK FOR THIS?

im sorry for being a bitter today but i really feel like this(bitter), so not sorry maybe😗

but i didn't mean it when i said idgaf to ur insecurities.. i do honey its just been a rough week and i dont know how to put my anger in to the words

it can be a evil eye 🧿 or i just might be a drama queen sooo.. again sorry(?) if anything offends u, i love you guys but its just so complicated here(my head) and i just dont know

and now im just being weird w all this nonsense

i should go now, i will return your dms asap just need some rest

loves, siena

[mychapel-004]

i am about to ramble like a crazy person abt the fnaf movie so scroll if u don’t like spoilers

was not expecting all the love on my last post so i will keep posting thoughts abt the movie

another thing that rlly interested me in the movie was the focus on images, how humans process things through what we see rather than context, and how this sets up the fnaf movie trilogy to focus on fnaf 4 in the next movies.

the most obvious example is abby, we’re explicitly told that children communicate and understand things through pictures, which mike sorta shrugs off until he starts seeing the bigger picture. this then applies to the animatronics when he learns that they are also children and incredibly influenced by the drawings in their environment. the restaurant in the movie is very much a living thing of its own, the way it thrums to life when abby enters, and the animatronics know the truth of the drawing the second it is pinned up, and the animatronics are an extension of that.

a less obvious example is mike. even though he shrugs off abby’s teacher, and the point she makes about him being at the centre of all her pictures, he is much the same. it isn’t just children who are influenced by images. he has been returning to the same image every night for we don’t even know how long, the same picture of the nebraskan trees, the same perfect family picture he describes to vanessa, the same image of his brother looking at him out of the car window. everything he does is a result of this image. he is wholly consumed by it, believes he can somehow change the picture and see the truth beneath it if he just tries hard enough.

the ghost children, specifically golden freddy, change the image for him in an attempt to placate him into giving them abby, but no matter if he dreams of a happy family, it wont change the truth of what happened. just like how pasting a picture of five children happily holding hands with a golden bunny won’t change the truth underneath. images are fallible, they don’t tell the truth and we cannot trust our brains.

firstly i think this is a really fun direction to take in context to how the movie humanises the animatronics. fnaf 1 is a game made entirely of scary, still images of the animatronics, save for the jumpscares and foxy’s run. the lore is sparse and entirely given through exposition (if i hear one more person complain abt vanny only being there for exposition and not phone guy’s two minute loredump at the start of every night in the game i will lose it), and we know nothing other than that our death is imminent.

but the truth is that these animatronics are kids. they’re scared and lost and confused and cannot understand what has happened. underneath bonnie in the west hallway camera and freddy staring at you from the showtime room are terrified kids doing what they feel they have to. the movie was incredibly dedicated to showing that these kids still want to build pillow forts and sing to music and tickle their friends and be a family and i think it was a great choice.

i think all this focus on images is definitely a perfect lead into fnaf 4 (im not 100% on my book lore but i believe there are three books that cover fnaf 1, fnaf 4 and then sister location??) especially with the recent lore update that all of fnaf 4 is hallucinations. we don’t need a lore explanation of how the nightmares could be real because… they aren’t. following the game timeline, fnaf 4 would have already happened by now but we could easily see a return to it through mike, especially if the schmidt-emily or schmidt-afton theories are true and mike could have been the child in fnaf 4 but surpressed his memories. firstly we have a protagonist who is already on sleeping medication and has dreams that can be easily manipulated. this is a perfect setup for the nightmare animatronics to start making themselves known.

i also think that fnaf 1 was intentionally visually tame. the themes of the movie are actually very dark, they don’t shy away from the truth of the bodies being hidden in the suits, the animatronics Very Brutally kill the burglars, max is literally bitten in half and her body is hidden away, but the on-screen gore keeps it pg. this 100% allows them to experiment further with the levels of gore, tension and violence if they do fnaf 4, because quite frankly some of the nightmares are horrifying.

TLDR this movie sets up a million directions and theories that the next one could go in, and theres nothing the fnaf fandom loves more than vague lore and theory crafting

vanny post next bc i have Thoughts

[crushedsweets]

SCREAMING SHAKING YOU OVER YOUR CREEPYPASTA SQUID GAMES ART YES YEEEEES YESSSSS 💥💥💥💥💥 silly silly question abt it but how do u think they (clocky toby kate and nina but u can include other creeps too) would die in squid games and how devastating would it be

ok so i kept TRYING to think about it as i drew but i legit couldnt come up with anything. so ill try to scramble out ideas now

it would take place in s2 because i drew them with the X/Os on their shirts (and s2 is more fun to me). . . spoilers ahead most likely. also SUPER disorganized and messy because if i tried to make this organized and clean itd take me an hour

so squid game AU where they all existed without slendy. im gonna focus on toby/nat/nina/kate/EJ(the creepjects) but ill mention jeff, ben, lulu, ann, brian, tim, jane, and liu

why theyre in debt/how the salesman approached them

toby is not a proxy, he's in the games because his mom is in a ton of medical debt after lyra's death and she went back to frank bc of it. toby is in there to relieve her debt, mostly so she can leave frank for good. he never killed his dad. the salesman prob came up to him after he and his dad got into a really violent fight after lyras death and he stormed out and was in a really bad spot.

similarly, i sort of like the idea of Jack's parents going into debt. its not his fault at all, but his dad maybe starts gambling for fun, it spirals out of control, he keeps desperately gambling to fix his mistakes, and its fucking up their (and all his 5 siblings) lives. i think he'd get approached by the salesman after pulling a lot of his own savings out to help his parents, only for it to barely make a dent in their debt and causing a huge argument between him and his dad.

natalie would fall into student loan debt after she moves states away for art school to escape her family, and they never had any savings, so the expenses piled up and financial aid/working multiple jobs couldnt keep up with them. she was approached by the salesman after cussing out a customer and getting fired on the spot cuz of it.

nina was big on buying, reselling, etc with a lot of fashion items. she eventually would get into a lot of luxury items, which immediately up the prices. even if they werent scams, she probably shouldnt have been buying them anyway, but she got screwed over severely and fall into credit card debt. however instead of trying to pay it off, she'd keep fucking herself cuz she has no self control. doesnt even realize how bad her debt is till its unsalvageable. salesman prob approached her after her card got declined and she finally called her bank and got the news and started freaking out.

i think kate was just pulling out loans to afford basic things. probably started with a car because she was young and fresh out of the foster system(IN A NON-SLENDY AU BTW) and needed transportation so she can work and get settled into her adult life. fucked over by a loan shark who took advantage of her being financially illiterate and had insane interest rates, resulting in her pulling out more loans to avoid getting her ass kicked, only for it to spiral. prob got approached by salesman after a loan shark roughed her up for being late and shes on her last leg

this is really hard cuz i love them all so much i dont wanna kill any of them and i can think of 100 reasons for why each would be 'good' to kill off for the sake of the story and 100 reasons why their death would be bad for my soul

SO REDLIGHT GREENLIGHT

i think in redlightgreenlight, kate and toby wouldve been arguing abotu some stupid shit. kate shoves toby when the song ends, he hits the floor, and the doll turns around. hes still on the floor, and some people start getting shot. thats when they realize this is a death game and kate realizes she nearly killed him(and possibly herself) if she pushed him even 5 seconds later.

realistically, nina would die in redlightgreenlight because the blood/gunshots would scare her so bad she'd be one of the people shaking, screaming, or running. BUT I DONT WANT HER TO SO THIS DEATH CAN BE HYPOTHETICAL.

SO ILL SAY INSTEAD the reason nina survives despite her shaking is because she's hiding behind Clocky. who is doing good at the game and doesnt even realize nina has been hiding behind her until the end of the game, in which she turns around like "...?why are you standing so close back up."

i think jack would be sort of quiet and not really notable in the first game. i dunno why but he seems like a character that would show up later. OR he'd be like Ali(199 s1) or Hyun-ju(120 s2) who makes their first big move by saving someone else, even if it risks their life.

SO THEN THE FIRST VOTE.

nina immediately votes X, clocky votes O, toby votes O, kate votes O, EJ votes O. theyre all desperate and think the only reason ppl lost redlightgreenlight was fear/confusion, and that the next games cant be that bad.

THEN THE SIX LEGGED PENTATHALON.

they'd all get put together.

toby would play ddakji. clocky plays flying stone. nina plays gong-gi. jack plays spinning top. kate plays jegi.

i think for other creeps, id prob shove some of them into a group against their will where they'd go in super confident and then die. like jeff/ben/lulu would be in a group, asking Ann to join. she'd reject them, and die in her own group

SO THE SECOND VOTE

EJ, Nina, and Clocky vote X. Kate and Toby vote O. clocky screams at them for it. kate just kinda sits there and lets her yell, but toby argues back. "you selfish fucking pricks why would you do that?!" "i need the fucking money man EVERYONE here needs the money stop bitching!" etc. Nina doesnt talk to them for the rest of the night, till the next game. EJ talks to them and is like "i understand. it was your decision, not mine." because he also almost voted O

SO MINGLE.

round one with 10 people, they get grouped with jeff(013), ben(404), lulu(400), jane(119), and liu(310). (i think jeff would be dragging lulu around everywhere. ben follows jeff voluntarily, jane and liu end up there cuz they needed two more)

round two with 4, jack and clocky are like "go take the other three into a room ill find someone else" but theyre losing time arguing, so toby and kate end up dragging clocky. so clocky, nina, kate, and toby in a room. jack barely scrapes by with another room, so theyre all so relieved when he shows up - but theres a moment of awkward tension between toby and jack, because toby chose clocky without second thought

round 3 with 3, toby, kate, and clocky get in a room together. nina is freaking out grabbing onto jack in near tears, and before jack can find someone, another tim(209) and brian(214) grab nina and force her into a room. leaving jack with nobody.

JACK IS ELIMATED IN MINGLE. nina is screaming banging on the wall. the others have no idea he's dead until they see nina choking on her tears.

round 4 with 6, nina doesnt wanna go with toby or kate anymore, but clocky begs her to just stick with them. so nina, toby, kate, and clocky. jeff and ben join them, leaving lulu to die. jeff defends himself saying he swore he left her with a group of 5.

round 5 with 2, toby and kate. nina and clocky. jeff and ben. jane and liu. tim and a random man who forced his way into the room before brian could, leaving brian to die. tim starts beating the man while the door is locked, nearly killing him before the door opens.

lulu, jack, and brian are elimated in mingle.

SO VOTE 3...

Clocky, Nina, Jane, Liu, Tim, and Toby vote X. Jeff, Ben, and Kate vote O.

nina's the one to scream at kate now, but kate once again just sits there and takes it. kate is Unfortunately Quite indifferent to herself or the people around her dying. toby voted X this time cuz of Jack's death + Nina and Clocky are just so distraught.

kate, being 008, is one of the last people to vote so it's a huge like ?! moment.

then the bathroom scene happens after the tie . . .

i think ben and liu die in the bathroom scene. liu didnt mean to get into a fight, and ben bit off more than he could chew. jeff is losing his mind cuz he's all alone now. jane is distraught after lius death so clocky/nina console her. kate sees toby covered in blood and she's shaken up by it.

SO LIGHTS OUT HAPPENS.

jeff kills jane. im sorry. im so sorry. she doesn't deserve it but he'd go straight for her.

this literally only leaves clocky, nina, toby, kate, jeff, and tim as MC's...

ok the issue here now is How would the whole revolution happen... i think tim would have to be in gi-hun/456's position and he's the one to lead it.

tim, toby, clocky, kate would go. nina and jeff stay back cuz jeff WANTS to stay in the game and nina doesnt wanna die (plus the others wouldnt let her join).

so. yeah. um. thats so pathetic i really jsut squidgamed them all

[elusiiev]

The Brainrot is Consuming me.

anyway earlier me an my friends were discussing what kinda clothes the main cast of omor would wear bc.... yk half of the cast is in fucking npc ass attire, and we went back and forth about it a lot and now i feel obligated to share this with other people to see if they might agree with my headcanons

mari - for mari i feel like she's very much a cardigan girly, sundresses all the time, probably like sweetheart and square necklines on a lot of her shirts, and she consistently puts lots of time into her appearance, more so for her own pleasure than anything else. however if she doesnt get to change out of pajamas she'd probably get a little upset and feel unproductive as a result - idk she just seems very schedule oriented and i feel her clothing style and habits would match that. she 100% irons clothes, if somethings wrinkly shes not wearing it, and she'd lean into the academia aesthetic. she also gives summer vibes to me, but that might just be because the main canon images of her are during summertime - also lots of purples and yellows, purples her fav color and yellow is the complementary color, plus a color associated with bright light and summertime

hero - he'd probably have a more basic style of fashion, but still look very cute in it. like big sweatshirts, long coats, button ups, wide leg jeans, collared shirts, clean shoes, all in all a very clean look. he prob has some of mari's jackets in his closet that he wears pretty frequently. also he would always wear earrings BECAUSE I SAID SO I THINK ITS AWESOME he might also be a bit into academia fashion, but less over-the-top "i'm the top professor of this college" look and more just autumnal tones and mildly professional attire. also i feel like hero would iron some of kel's clothes if he noticed they were very wrinkled, which might result in hero running out of time to iron clothes for himself, in which he just switches his outfit last minute. this is hyperspecific but but but but but yes

kel - this man does not know fashion, all his tips are from hero, which hero got from mari. his wardrobe probably consists of graphic tees he found funny or pretty, hand-me-downs from hero, and plain shirts and jeans, probably with a couple rips in them from him being reckless. also he always wears some sort of brace, either on his arm or leg he is consistently getting hurt in some minor way /j dirty converses real!! also probably some pen/pencil marks on articles of clothing from getting bored and deciding to doodle randomly on them. also bracelets from random fundraisers or from crafts with the rest of the gang

aubrey - shes actually kinda hard for me to figure out, but i ffeel like aubrey would be wearing a lot of graphic tshirts and tank tops, but like those ones with extra detail yk the ones the grunge ones yeah those, and like huge cargo pants or wide leg jeans, chains hanging from pockets, necklaces and bracelets, and generally ripped things. so kinda punk but also still very fem and not very out there in terms of fashion styles . however this would only be half the time, this half is when she's really feeling like putting in effort to look nice, probably being like "im gonna be like mari today" and spending a good chunk of time putting together an outfit and such. the other half she's fucking done with it and throws on whatever shirt she can find and some pants, tosses her hair a little bit and throws on eyeliner and is out the door, somehow looking gorgeous still. like that effortlessly pretty look even when theres nothing outstanding abt the outfit

basil - grandma ass /j he probably thrifts constantly and the antique store is one of his fav places, so it seeps into how he dresses. lots of sweatshirts with intricate embroidered or sewn in designs, coats, lots of browns and greens, and very worn things. probably wears some traditionally feminine things he finds too jsut because he thought they were nice, again think grandmacore /j he's a very green and wiggly boy, lots of layers in his outfits, and is pretty rarely seen with short sleeve shirts. also collared shirts, messenger bags, pins, custom patches, and friendship bracelets. his clothing represents who he is and can tell a lot about him for the most part, basically story telling through what he wears since he has so many accessories that come from different places. also lots of floral patterns because he's he's the flower boy the little man the flower guy . in summary cottagecore mori kei esque things

sunny - his ass is not putting together outfits /j ok so i feel like sunny is the type to save his energy for other things, i feel like socializing might be a bit draining for him but he loves his friends, so he kind of switches up how he uses his energy to accommodate. but sometimes he'd probably wanna be like mari and put himself otgether, so he probably goes shopping with her and has cute clthes, his outfits just end up being very simple with a graphic tshirt and maybe an oversized jacket. HE ALWAYS WEARS SHORTS!!!! he dislikes the feel of pants and preferred shorts, even if he's cold. if he'd cold he just kinda balls up and puts a jacket around his legs. anyway i feel like he's probably being restricted a lot by his preferences (i hc he has autism and this is one of the ways it impacts him) so he's not the most fashionable person

OK THATS IT this took too long to write it took like maybe 30 minutes ummmmfehrhfweifu im obsessed with this game its taking over my every thought i needed to express this my brains going crazy bhhuu8ewifihbweifuweifok

[menlove]

wait curious about your thoughts on this. i genuinely dont believe the paul john reconciliation thing that paul pushes in every interview (abt the bread phone call etc) like im sure they had that conversation and maybe that was a nice memory but theres a paul late november 1980 interview (good morning america i think?) where the interviewer is like “john said you died creatively etc” and then paul gets very awkward and said he just keeps quiet publicly or else john will get resentful and that he doesnt know why john does that. its literally like two weeks before john died idk im like a mclennon ended on bad terms truther and i genuinely believe pauls batshit behavior the last 40 years is the result of him feeling bad about everything

I think I'm at a bit of a middle road with it! because there's certainly that (although what john actually said in that interview was meant differently and seemingly misconstrued to paul to try and start drama, although it sadly says a lot that paul sort of just expected that sort of thing by that point) & I do think that their relationship by 1980 was a lot more complicated than paul has wanted to talk about (for good reason). I wanna say there's a few interviews where he even says that, like it was difficult to come to terms with his feelings on everything with john bc suddenly he was Dead you know?

but I do think them reconciling and being friends again wouldn't necessarily negate that. there was a lot of baggage between them at that point & it would be very easy for the two of them to be Wary of each other even if they WERE on good terms and calling more often. which would just make paul's reaction to "john said you died creatively" even more of a blow for him like "what the hell, we're on good terms now, why is he STILL saying this shit?" and given that it was misconstrued and I wanna say not even a PUBLISHED interview yet, he really had nothing to go on except being ambushed by that question

plus there's the fact that they apparently had a recording studio booked for '81 and john was set to come back to england to record with him. and ofc (just like) starting over in general, though that depends on how much you believe that was for paul

honestly I think john died while they were on confusing terms. not really a Great place but also not on bad terms either. sort of a "yeah okay, we've made up, we're trying, maybe we'll get together and record, now what?" sort of place. especially given a lot anecdotes that yoko was fielding calls from paul & requests to come see john. I think they both Wanted to make up, but life was in the way. so they got phone calls about bread. but paul was obviously still wary and hurt/confused by john's back and forth behavior. I think there's some other quote somewhere from paul about how he never knew what he'd be picking the phone up to. on john's end, he probably WAS hopeful and fully intent on recording with him in the next year and, ya know, starting over. for paul, he probably didn't know if he could hold him to that or even hold him to being nice the next time they talked.

but ya know, 40+ years down the line, it's probably a bit easier to cling onto the good moments and not the confusion around where they stood at the end. lots of time for reflection on how john must have been feeling & coming to the conclusion that they WERE on track to being okay again. I think at the Time paul was probably just rightfully very cautious & that had to be a weird feeling to deal with after any future plans were killed with john

[iatrophilosophos]

The other thing I'm thinking about this morning is the limitation of any one analytical lens and poor application of gender theory to interpersonal relationships.

Gonna frontload this post with the caveats that 1) this is about cafab relationships to transmisogyny, which i welcome discussion from anybody on but also recognize some ppl are just not invested in or interested in hearing, and thats fine 2) i am speaking from a place of good faith (classical def.) and assuming that we can take what people say about their intentions at face value and these topics are occurring within relationships with grace and legitimate desire to do right by eachother, even though this approach does not always work and is not an exhaustive or universal lens.

My friend said sumn last year that was really foundational for me--"there's always another explanation [for interpersonal instances of transmisogyny]". Meaning, transmisogyny is the sum of small and big events across a person's life, and for TMA people it doesn't really matter if a partner has hateful or "transmisogynistic" intentions behind an action that contributes to the structure. There's always a self-centered reason that has nothing to do with The Structure. My other friend has a line that I think also fits here, which is the idea that most people most of the time don't really have "rational" or cognizant motivations prior to action, just post hoc narrativization of why they did what they did. I don't know how much I agree, but I think it's an interesting lens to use to think about our past actions that can get useful results--how much of the story that I'm telling about this event got written after it, and how does that affect everything moving forward?

This stage setting brings us to a specific cohort that I've definitely been a part of and am working on distancing from: strong willed/bullheaded cafabs with significant personal needs and abrasive interpersonal tendencies. Being someone that only very aquiescing, self-sacrificing people can stand to be around means you're gonna benefit a lot interpersonally from transmisogyny, because trans women and especially young, vulnerable, and/or early transition women are gonna be a large % of the people you attract.

People in this cohort usually know it on some level IME and feel a lot of shame and anxiety around it. Transfem friends and partners will bring it up. We get one of the good ones type behaviors, compensatory hating and policing of other people, and white knighting; and we get various manifestations of definitional games that all fit into the "ontologically incapable of violence" header. Your classic uwuification of cafabs, but also misguidedly trying to find common ground and misconflating relationships to womanhood (talking abt how ppl treated you ten years ago doesn't paper over the thing You are doing Now), and getting into some really bizarre IME feminist ally dudebro shit that seems copypasted from 2012 cishet feminist ally lines (these are also??? Bad????)

All of this shit behavior can((see above caveat #2)) stem from being too lost in the sauce of structural analysis. I think the line that there's always another explanation has a corrolary: you can basically always, to varying levels of accuracy and usefulness, paint an interpersonal problem in the context of structural analysis. And this can be very useful, and it is mainly useful to people who are subject to that structural oppression to understand what is happening and why it feels bad. I see for my friends theory around transmisogyny often (but obviously not exclusively) function as a frame of understanding that says "it isn't your fault. No amount of personality modification will keep this from happening again. Time to take a different tract." This is very useful and good.*

However: this specific understanding of the function of transfeminist theory does not play the same for this cohort of cafab people, because behavioral modification IS the way to get better about shit and stop it from happening. In a lot of these circumstances WE have to understand explanations of transmisogyny as an explanation for why behaviors, attitudes and modes of interaction feel bad to our friends. Yet a third dear friend has a line in a piece of writing that I don't remember if is published or not that says, paraphrasing: "transmisogyny is not 'real', it is a concept we use to understand patterns and attitudes". The essence of a transmisogynist action or behavior or pattern that we exert towards our loved ones is only that it triggers a pattern and understanding of the world; not that it has a big red "GENDER CRIME" stamp on it somewhere.

If we want to throw off the benefits and privileges of being TME in the interpersonal sphere, we have to get fucking nicer to people. We have to yell less and listen more. We have to interrogate the ghosts of our loved ones that set up shop in our heads and challenge how they diverge from the evidence of the real people in front of us. We have to employ whatever dumbass therapyspeak tools let us be more thoughtful and intentional with how we treat eachother. We have to confront the anxiety that we are Problematic and not imbue metaphysical significance to the fact that we Hurt Someone, because that opens the door to us trying to fix it with yet more metaphysical action and not just going "oh, I need to work on the way I percieve your words because the way you express dissent doesn't immediately register to me and I've been steamrolling you for weeks. Shit, I'm sorry, can I ask some questions that will help me notice next time this comes up and react better?"

Finally I'm gonna end with this: transmisogyny as an understanding of lifetime patterns of experience is not One Thing that applies evenly to every TMA person. One of the biggest pieces of me landing on all this above is being frustrated about how everyone I know has a slightly different bar and I couldn't just "stop being transmisogynist", cuz different shit hurts different people. This is kinda my connecting thread to my earlier post about offensive jokes: once we hit the sphere of microaggressions and non-overt patterns and loved ones that want us to actually work on shit instead of divesting, there just isn't actually a prescriptive answer and we have to be familiar with the theory shorthands ppl around us are using, AND aware of how our personal tendencies and patterns of behavior fit into that theory, AND exercising curiosity and care to figure out what the tangible steps for people we love are.

*note that with all theory I do think that even this framing can get stretched to a point it is no longer accurate or useful to goals I think r worthwhile, but that's not my lane to talk about exhaustively.