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nothanksjohnny · 5 months ago
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Im back on my insanity run and I said to myself
"Self?"
"Yeah what's up bbygirl"
" there should be more thoughts of bots being a bit scared of humans"
"That's a great idea"
Anyways here are my thoughts. I've read a lot of different kinds of opinions and site's and kinda just jumbled it all together. Cybertronains have their own diets and while energon is a large portion of it there is some verity. While they can eat and mildy digest human food it's not recommend due to gaining no nutrition due to it being carbon based and them not really needing it in the form earth's vegetation and species give. Of course this still means a curious bot or has tried a human meal. Although this isn't really what drives them off. No rather its how humans catch,prepare and vocally crave other living organisms. It's not a oddity to us to hear someone whine on how there "dying to eat some ribs!" Or are dying "for some grilled salmon and rice." It's something that can lead to conversion and finding common ground. This is not the same for a cybertrioan upon hearing this and learning just where these meats come from they will appear uneasy and in their own way sick. Their plating tight as their optics glance at you before recommending you to eat some fruit or any snacks they've come to have stored away for any of their earthly companions upon a ship or a base. This is just hearing this mind you. Now seeing someone eat is another. Eating something as simple as Jerky will get you stares and one of them going out to purge their tanks. This is just something that doesn't make alot of noise. As someone who eats the cartilage off of chicken bone I can imagine it causes them to rethink their options of how weak humans are. They can't help but clamp their plating and shift uncomfortably as they hear your molars grind at the cartilage and tear and snap as it's forces off the bone. Primus help them if you chew the bone slightly. It's almost as bad as when humans describe how much joy they gain from this " please stop talking how much you enjoy the ribcage from a cows carcas." " come on man I don't judge you when you drink blood." Their one "how to cook steak properly" from screaming on how you eating other living being. Vegans and vegetarians aren't safe either once they learn how plants feel pain in their own form. Did you know under black light a plants chlorophyll appear red? Yeah your getting a side eye as well its not as bad but they still don't want to see you eat around them. Now you may be asking " well if their so uncomfortable with the subject how do some of them eat our food then?" Some ways this can happen is that the bot may be unaware at first and never gave a true thought were those chicken wings come from. Another is maybe they don't care as much. Plenty of them have done dishonorable things what's wrong doing a small one.
Another factor that causes them to wonder just how "harmless" their human companions are is when we do rather primal acts. Have you ever wanted for spook someone or just not be seen? You stalk them to achieve this. Now while we don't do it like our canine or feline companions I belive we still do it in our own way. You tense and for some even hunch yourself over a bit in a attempt to make yourself smaller for a lesser chance of being seen. You take soft yet full steps as you ease your weight on each leg to not cause to much noise. Or maybe you lift your heels off the ground and step with the front of your foot taking strides as you crouch and keep your legs firm on the ground. You keep yours eyes focused and either hold or try and even out soft breaths. You hear every creak and shift until eventually you pounce a yelp cause a smile to curl on your face. Or maybe your trying to catch a fly carefully trying to almost play the insect that your just passing by before you trying to slam a object or your hand on it in hopes of killing it. It's makes any autobot or decepticon shiver as they see it happen. Or maybe they stumbled upon children playing hide and seek ( dont ask me how their big ahh selfs somehow manage to not be seen). They can't help but freeze as they see these smaller pathetic organics go still and listen shifting and holding their limbs tight yet isn't help the trembling causw by the thrill of the chase as they snap their head a certain direction and dig their feet into the ground to start running with a push. To see them giggle and smile aa they creep up on their friends and just like the fly pretend they don't know someone's there until they to pounce " got you!" Is squealed happily and yet all the poor bot can think is " I need off this fragging planet" They can't help but let their processor run wild as they one day notice you doing the same to them. Ratchet at the computer and the others are simply lounging around the base and there you are. Not even half their size but you eyes seem to snap to the poor medic and you grin. Soft steps and your eyes concentrated and they slightly dilate. A smile that shows the tips of your canines as your breath slowly shifts to larger silent intakes of air. The others take notice but they can't help but stare. You can't harm ratchet. You wield no weapon. So why?. Their optics trace you and it's so unusual. It's code for them to know how to deal with situations yet here you are. No training and yet your mind is already making all the hopefully successful changes to catch what your hunting. A primal itch that adores to take the front in now subtle ways in modern society. So they watch. Watch and slowly move their helms to following you as you making your move closer to the medic shifting through the noises of the conversations still playing out. Shifting out of view when the medic moves just slightly. And then when your just a few away from his peds you snap your teeth on the rabbits neck snapping it with the sound of " Hey ratchet whatcha doing?" As his yelp and huffs is intangled with laughter at his misfortune. Your canines presented by pulled back lips as teeth snap and cause a soft dull clank to fill a empty space as you smile at the medic that now has a scowl on his faceplate. Blue optics causing a whirrrr noise as they shift in a mimic as to how any creature on earths eyes do naturally. All as the the others shift and silently keep in mind to always glance behind them hoping they won't have misfortune to be your next rabbit.
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formulapookie · 3 months ago
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👨‍❤️‍👨
Maybe we can be more than this diggianini, 2.2k
Diggia has been staring for ten minutes now, Enea asleep on his couch, legs open and thighs naked for his eyes.
The tattoo is slightly peeking from the shorts he’s wearing, and Diggia wishes he wore shorter shorts just to see more of him.
Even tho he technically doesn’t like men.
Technically.
Enea and him, they’re an exception, they’re something none of the two is willing to label past the “we aren’t gay but we fuck”
And right now Diggia would very much like for them to be fucking because Enea just looks too beautiful to be left there without touching him.
But it’s not like he can wake him up and ask for sex without an excuse, because now THAT would be gay.
Enea doesn't follow football, at least, not like he does, he's probably not aware Dybala has accepted to stay at Roma even if he head a huge offer on the table, and he had told Enea about how sad he would be about a transfer already
So he has to find an excuse, and has to find it quick because he's getting hard and wouldn't want to walk around his house hard like that while he has Enea over.
"Ao"
No response, Enea looks angelic like this, short hair framing his face in a painting-like way.
"Ao bestia"
A small movement, a grunt, but Enea's eyes are still closed, he switches positions, now his thigh tattoo is even more exposed. God Diggia wants to bite it.
"Bestia ao svejate" (Bestia oi wake up)
Enea opens his eyes, stretching lighlty revealing the V line just above the hem of his shorts, his happy trail making Diggia's mouth water almost as much as the tattoo.
"What"
He almost feels guilty for what he's doing, but all his morality dies down when he sees hoe Enea's gaze immediately goes at his dick, which is now clearly hard in his shorts.
"I'm - I just read a news that made me sad, you know? They're probably selling Dybala to whatever stupid Arab team that will pay him millions and I'm feeling really down. Care to help me feel better?"
Enea would want to roll his eyes back, he knows the footballer has actually already signed with Roma, Diggia just wants a blowjob and doesn't know how to ask for it properly.
But it's not like he doesn't like the idea of getting on his knees for him, he just wishes he could ask like a normal person.
Like "Enea I'm horny can you give me a blowjob? You know that I'd get back to you with a fuck in the near future anyway"
But he's happy with this too, he still gets to suck him off and later get his back blown by him.
"Seriously? that's sick bro. Like for real he's accepting money over quality?"
Diggia nods, Enea would like to play along to see how much it takes for diggia to give in and ask, but he's getting hard too and wants this to happen as soon as possible.
"You want me to make you feel better now?" "Yeah"
Enea smiles, moving so he's fairly close to Diggia before climbing down the couch between the man's already parted legs, letting him shift closer to the edge so to have easier access to his pants.
Enea works the fly open and shoves the shorts down, Diggia lets out a breath and curses himself for the really slim self control he has whenever he's with him.
In a few seconds he's stripped of his boxers too, he can feel Enea's lips on his tip and a hand squeezing the base of his dick .
"Fuck" He wants more, of this, always, the man is just too good with his mouth and lips to just have him do this every once in a while.
But wanting him more would be gay no? At least he thinks.
His attention is brought back to reality when Enea gets him deeper for the first time, head hitting the back of his throat making him gag for a second.
Diggia gets his hand on Enea's head, fingers tangling with his curls, pushing him more against his V-line, making him take more of his dick.
"Fuck don't stop"
Enea smiles, for as much as he can with a dick in his mouth, and bobs his head rhythmically, feeling the grip on his hair tighten and the sounds coming from Diggia getting louder and louder, grunts deeper and - fuck - masculine in a way that gets Enea weak to his knees.
Because he wants those sounds to be made directly next to his ears as Diggia fucks him like an animal, in front of a mirror so he can see how he looks when he's getting fucked, and can look at Diggia too, perfect body on display, all those moles he wants to kiss and commit to his memory.
He moans around his dick, getting Diggia to tilt his head back once again, letting out a deep moan that goes stright to Enea's dick, getting it even harder than it was the moment he got on his knees.
"Need to - fuck - need to cum I'm close I-" getting Diggia to this state where he's not completely able to form sentences is what gets Enea going, he knows the kind of power he has over him, and as the fucking bastard he is uses it at any given occasion.
He breaks away from him for just a second and looks up at Diggia, big eyes shining with need.
He meets the other's gaze in a dance of lust and desire, and has to restrain himself from getting up the floor and kiss him until he's drained.
"You can do it in my mouth, since you're so upset"
And Diggia thinks he could die now, because he'd never ask for something like that, but if it was Enea offering he surely wouldn't refuse.
"Yeah yeah ok yeah"
He's pathetic like that but it's not like Enea cared about it in this moment, he just wants to taste Diggia on his tongue and hope he's desperate enough to ask him to fuck afterwards.
He feels Diggia's dick twitch in his mouth and then a flow of hot and sticky cum down his throat.
It doesn't taste good, doesn't taste taht bad either, he's had experience enough to know this is a pretty normal taste for it.
He swallows everything, and hears Diggia curse again, he's glad he has this effect on him.
Enea lets go of his dick with a pop, bitter taste still on his tongue, and waits for Diggia to choose.
It's either he jerks him off on the couch or does something proper and gets him naked and moaning under him in the next two minutes.
“Can I fuck you? Still need a bit of release you know?”
“Yeah me too, am still disappointed by some shit at Ducati”
One would think Enea would get tired of always compromising with this way Diggia has of asking for things.
But as long as he gets to fuck or get fucked by him that’s fine to him.
“Pass the lube to me will you?”
They always keep one close to the couch at Diggia’s, that’s where most of their fucks happen anyway, it would make no sense to place it elsewhere.
“Yeah it’s uhm here here you go do - your thing”
He’s blushing, just thinking of Enea fingering himself open gets him like that, gets him hot and horny more than he already is.
Enea coats two of his fingers with lube , heating it up that bit to get it comfortable, but doesn’t waste time, he’s too needy for it.
He hints at Diggia to get his shorts off, and the man freezes when he sees he’s got no boxers underneath.
He just. He hasn’t. He is naked under there. Like he did it on purpose.
Enea opens his legs, fingers slightly pushing into his hole as he lets out a shaky breath.
“Ah”
Enea leant like to waste time, much less when he’s with Diggia an knows he’s pathetically quit at orgasming when he’s fucked by him.
He pushes two fingers in with no ceremony, it’s not been long since he did that himself but doing it in front of Diggia - fuck it was different, he could feel his own wetness being much more than usual, his need increased by a mile.
Diggia has his eyes locked on the scene, Enea’s finger thrusting in and out at a quick pace, squelching sound and soft whimpers filling up the room with lust.
He shouldn’t be enjoying it this much, shouldn’t even be looking in the first place, but he can’t help it, not when Enea looks like that, open and needy and fucking hot.
He’s practically drooling when he sees Enea pushing a third finger inside, his hole stretching around them, sound getting more and more arousing, his dick coming back to life.
He needs to be inside him and needs it now.
Enea can feel Diggia looking, staring actually, at him, at what he’s doing, and he knows it gets the other hard, but can’t dwell too much on that thought, especially when he wants Diggia to fuck him stupid and have him babbling nonsense.
“I’m ready Diggia you - fuck me”
It’s direct, something they don’t do that often, especially when the tone is so desperate like Enea’s right now, but Diggia couldn’t have waited for greater words, and just gets a few centimeters from him.
He’s got the decision of his life ahead of him.
It’s either he fucks Enea on all fours and gets to watch his perfect ass jiggle every time he thrust inside him, then comes on his back.
Or he fucks him like this, looking at him, pretty face making expressions of pleasure at each hit to the prostate, then coming all over his abs, face if he’s lucky enough.
“Are you gonna do something or are you not sad anymore?”
It gets Diggia back to Earth, fuck it he’s gonna take him like that, who cares if looking in his eyes will make him think about how beautiful Enea is.
He aligns his dick with Enea’s hole, slowly pushing in, it’s been more than a month since they went, despite his need to wreck him he tries to be at least gentle.
“Fuuuuck you’re big ah”
And it’s not like Diggia doesn’t know, he’s been told that by many many girls before, and he knows himself but fuck.
Hearing Enea practically moan that out it’s. It’s something else. 
Enea is gripping at his bicep with force, like his life depends on it, he’s already whining and Diggia is drunk at the sight.
“Move come on I don’t have all day”
Diggia wants to protest, saying he’s still too little stretched and needs to go slow, but when his eyes lock with Enea’s it all goes to shit.
He sets a rushed pace, Enea letting go of his arm and Diggia using that moment to pin both of Enea’s hands above his head with one of his, the other hand closing around the boy’s thigh, the one with the tattoo who got him so lightheaded before.
A series of ah ah ah makes its way out Enea’s chest, moans timed with Diggia’s thrusts, which are becoming more and more deep, more precise.
When he hits his prostate Enea arches his back, a long-dragged moan echoes in the room, it’s just Diggia’s name but it gets him harder than before.
Diggia keeps on fucking into him with his usual rushed and hard pace, not an ounce of self control left, so much he lowers himself on Enea and kisses him, lips chapped and coarse against soft and plump, Diggia might loose his mind at this, especially when Enea gets the initiative and pushes his tongue past his teeth, forcing them to taste each other and suffocating their moans in each other’s mouth.
“You feel so good around me fuck”
Diggia has enough brain capacity to utter these last words before being very much close to his release.
His hips buck more raggedly than before, voice becoming deeper making Enea wetter and needier for it.
He needs to feel that, and needs to feel owned by Diggia somehow.
Enea knows what Diggia wants, or needs more precisely.
Not because he’s a sort of magician but because he’s just that easy to read.
“Inside Diggia inside me. Please”
the older man is about to pass out. Enea might've just given him the best gift ever.
“You sure? I can -”
“Yes yes I’m sure just please I need to -  fuuck”
Diggia curls the hand squeezing his thigh around Enea’s dick, stroking it in time with his thrusts.
It’s not long, it’s very little actually, until Diggia comes with a grunt, buried deep inside a babbling Enea who just needs to have his release.
His hands are still held high above his head and he so desperately wants to break them free to tangle his fingers in Diggia’s hair and pull him in for a kiss.
Enea is quick to follow, a good enough flick of Diggia wrist does it for him, coming in spurts all over himself, painting his abs white and feeling his energy dissolve.
Diggia slips out, what usually is an uncomfortable silence now replaced by a feeling of mutuality.
Enea moving to curl up beside him, drifting back to the sleep he had disturbed.
In his heart Diggia knows he should understand this, himself, better.
But a part of him wants this to stay as it is, casual, confusing and hot.
Yeah, just like them, confusing and hot.
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bulbabutt · 3 months ago
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i don't know the etiquette for posting other peoples tiktoks but the delivery of this punchline hit me like a FUCKING TRUCK please
NikhilClayton <- you should follow this guy on tiktok he's fucking hilarious
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endykelopaedia · 5 months ago
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can you believe it guys, dashcon 10 yr anniversary, just a week away
edit; TODAY
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girldraki · 6 months ago
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riacte · 1 year ago
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not romantic not platonic but a secret third thing [what would happen between earth and the moon if the earth stopped spinning as illustrated by xkcd randall munroe]
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historiansmp3 · 2 months ago
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it’s fucking insane that a moderator had to say “there is no state where you can kill a baby after it’s born” at a presidential debate.
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czerwonywilk · 1 year ago
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a great change and a great way to execute the idea
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dopaminerjic · 8 months ago
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credit: @stupid-twink-girl
(this was an accidental repost, do rb the original instead)
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o-kurwa · 9 months ago
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winged-mammal · 1 month ago
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anyway yeah DELETE YOUR FUCKING ADVERTISING IDS
Android:
Settings ➡️ Google ➡️ all services ➡️ Ads ➡️ Delete advertising ID
(may differ slightly depending on android version and manufacturer firmware. you can't just search settings for "advertising ID" of course 🔪)
iOS:
Settings ➡️ privacy ➡️ tracking ➡️ toggle "allow apps to request to track" to OFF
and ALSO settings ➡️ privacy ➡️ Apple advertising ➡️ toggle "personalized ads" to OFF
more details about the process here via the EFF
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willabee · 1 month ago
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she checks the floor vents every day to see if the furnace is on yet and today was the day :)
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phantomrose96 · 7 months ago
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With the Reddit 3rd party app crackdown and the ongoing horseshit Elon Musk is pulling with "X", I realize a lot of people here might be pretty new. So I put together a quick and easy guide for using Tumblr for anyone new who might need it.
Tumblr was made by David Karp and we call him Daddy around these parts (^///^)
You are not safe from fandom-gif attacks ( •̀ ω •́ )✧
Speaking of fandoms, the tumblr fandoms are always ready to grab their [object] and go to war against the Beliebers ╰(*°▽°*)╯
The only safe refuge from fandom tumblr is with hipster tumblr. If you can get a cool alt-girl to take you under her wing, you might be safe... for now (●'◡'●)
You will watch the first episode of Supernatural... and then you're part of the Winchester family. (Or if you skip right to season 4, we don't blame you. It's where Destiel starts (*/ω\*))
This is not a glomp-free zone ☆*: .。. o(≧▽≦)o .。.:*☆
Use missing e. It's the only way to make Tumblr useable on Internet Explorer (this is the most popular browser and you're probably using it right now) :-D
Our only adult-supervision is John Green... and even then does that REALLY count as supervision? DFTBA! φ(゜▽゜*)♪
Just this once, everyone lives. It's bigger on the inside. Elementary, my dear Watson.
If you see Misha Collins staring at you, the polite response is "Saving people, hunting things, the family business." O.O
I might lose followers for this, but this blog supports gay rights, and yours should too (14 gifs of Sherlock and The Hobbit)
Tumblr will teach you more about the world than you'll ever learn in school. ○( ^皿^)っ
Tread carefully... we have teh yaoiz O.o. Oh you don't know what that means? Well let's just say... it's full of lemons here.
If you see Hannibal Lector in a flower crown, tell him it looks very nice. His boyfriend Will Graham made it for him. (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ)
Do not enter the dog park. The dog park will not harm you.
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butchfalin · 1 year ago
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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beardedmrbean · 2 months ago
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