#not anyone who came into my inbox asking for translations. just someone's post ABOUT translations

[theodysseyofhomer]

i get a lot of questions about which homer translations i recommend and what's the most "faithful" and it's kind of funny because you are asking a lay reader, so to speak. also you are talking to someone who grew up with biblical literalism and is constantly, actively deconstructing that approach to ancient, translated texts. i really think my personal fascination with translation is inseparable from that context. but since i can't completely step outside my context anyway, who's to say?

all this to say—being "faithful" to a text doesn't mean what i thought it meant, what i was taught it meant, when i was a child. translators have a lot to balance—how do you translate the meaning of the original, while also translating some of the feeling the original audience might have had, while also translating the metaphors of a world removed from the present? different translators put different elements forward. they may sacrifice what another translator would consider more important. to be sure, not all concerns put forward by a translator have equal merit. but they have to make choices, and they can't help but make choices. because they aren't separable from their context, either.

if you're interested in ancient literature, i don't think you should be searching for unbiased translations (which don't exist). i do hope you seek to understand what a translators' concerns (conscious or not) may be. and if you do that, and you care enough about translation work to read widely, you will intuitively learn more about the compromises and failures and successes of translation than i can describe to you, in my muddled way.

[somewhereincairparavel]

If Jason's character had been written to its fullest potential, as you and many others have discussed several times, do you think that there would still be a large amount of favouritism towards Percy or do you think there would just be people arguing over who's better?

Personally I like to think that if we had gotten a few books documenting Jason's time at Camp Jupiter prior to the release of The Lost Hero, people would've had time to warm up to Jason a bit more and develop a fondness for his character and then the second option probably would've happened but what do you think?

my inbox was sort of jammed w asks so I'm sorry this took so long anon! i wanted this post to be more in-depth and not lazily written so I waited for a while to get my motivation recharged again, i hope this post reaches you somehow haha

my take on this, is that yes, jason would've gained more support than he did originally, and there wouldn't have been an agressive bandwagon of people jumping on the slander train, but he would still be somewhat disliked/suppressed imo.

from what I've observed the hate doesn't just stem fom him being uninteresting, it's combined with a lot of people's attachment towards percy, that they gatekeep him and are agressive to anyone who even alludes that other characters have a chance of being more interesting/powerful if rick hadn't played favourites. (like hazel, nico, thalia, etc)

i think you'll get a better perspective with this example I'll be giving you from one of my observations (i sound like a philosophy professor pfft)

I was on the r/camphalfblood reddit once, and a post came up on my feed, the person went on to rant about how jason shouldn't be 'trying so hard to suck up to nico by being so overbearing' and that they 'wished it wasn't jason with nico in that scene, it should've been someone else' and that rick shouldn't have made jason so nice and understanding about it. they were outright bashing him for being supportive?? idk it was clear they favoured percy over him and had some kind of prejudice against jason.

i didn't even understand what op was so pressed about. that jason wasn't being homophobic and was being a supportive ally? lol thankfully the comments went off and a few of them said 'you're saying this but you would be bashing jason if he wasn't comforting nico as well, jason can never win in the fandom' and that was VERY true.

I've seen people say that jason shouldn't have been written to be a very handsome heartthrob either and that they were very annoyed that rick kept emphasizing his good looks, making him 'too perfect' but that person failed to acknowledge that rick emphasized percy's attractiveness way more than he did jason lol but that was apparently completely alright (to me it just translated to 'how dare rick make jason as good looking as percy, only percy is allowed to be hot, jason deserved to look like an ugly rat' LOL)

so you can see how people pick on him about the most trivial things ever to 'defend' percy from imaginary arguments/rivalry lol

if jason was written well, they'd still find a way to hate on him, probably tossing the 'hes such a gary stu he has no flaws' in there aswell

funny thing is that they hated him for being too perfect and not making mistakes, but proceeded to SHRED him to pieces during MOA when he said he was suspicious of nico. didn't you just claim that he needed flaws? but the moment he displays it you are driven off of the handle??

I do have an interesting perspective that works in jason's favour tho, where I'm willing to bet that atleast 80% of the fandom would've been sympathetic to his struggle and he would've become a fan favourite, even going as far as to rival percy's fame, where, like you mentioned, there would've been equal percy and jason stans and it would've become a debate as to who is better. (hint: villian jason grace) send me an ask if you want me to elaborate on this ;)

[sharpace]

I'm back again with more gamer au nonsense cuz you have ruined me XD

They're both recommended Fortnite by a youngster in Jayce's family and Jayce has never regretted something more.

He spends most of his time trying to build an entire house mid-fight because he finds the build mechanic too fun to not abuse.

Viktor however is a tyrant, he stands on the roof of said 'home' and snipes the living daylights out of anyone who comes at all within range, laughing manically the entire time.

Eventually someone RPGs him off the roof and he sulks about it for a while.

Jayce's problem came when they started allowing auto fill for fun. Vik spent the entire time giving frantic instructions in Russian just to confuse their new party member. Jayce had to try and guess what he was actually saying and translate for them (and himself) but gettin it wrong meant being blocked in a room by Vik.

Many Russian games and a few stuttering kids later, Jayce uninstalls the game from both their PCs. It was fun but he doesn't think his blood pressure can take it.

Vik watches him do this with that daft little grin cats have when they know they've broken something.

***

Jayce enjoys playing Zelda in the living room and Vik backseat games but only in one regard.

He makes s little game for himself where he waits for Jayce to clear and area then tells him how many vases/pots he missed on his journey.

He then leaves Jayce to scramble through the entire area again with only cryptic hints to guide him. Sometimes helping properly if he sees him getting genuinely frustrated.

He takes personal offense if Jayce gives up and leaves the area.

***

Vik discovers cooking mama and, with each level completed, their grocery list gets just a tad longer.

These experimental meals are done purely with the game as reference and can either become delicious dinners or kitchen horrors.

There was a time Jayce was tempted into the kitchen by the fire alarm to see the stove alight, Rio covered in flour and Vik sat on the floor - his cane embedded in the wall across the room.

Jayce knows true fear when Viktor completes levels en masse and spends most of his week supervising him each time he's in the kitchen. Their insurance is dwindling.

***

They dabble in a bit of Overwatch! Jayce immediately zones in on Reinhardt - big metal tank man with a giant party sized shield - because obviously.

Vik starts off with Sombra because he likes stealthy characters so being able to turn invisible and drop behind a team to start popping shots is entirely his forteit.

Then he discovers Bastion, a friendly robot who has an immobile form with a rotary cannon. N Jayce being the reliable tank with a shield... no one was safe. Sometimes you can hear him chuckle as he sits on the point downing entire teams at once.

He once spite mained Moira for an entire month after someone made a rude comment during a game he played as her. You've ever wanted a more aggressively passionate healer.

Jayce missed his insane robo partner though. Was very pleased when he started playing him again.

***

Tumblr nuked this ask midway through and I felt physical pain...

Aight that's all I have for now. Your art is positively gorgeous and gives me so many ideas from stuff that I play myself XD

I hope you don't mind me flooding your inbox with these long asks? If you prefer I can cut them into 1 game per ask n spread them out thru the week or I can be on my way completely if you find them too overwhelming!

Either way, hope you're doing well and having fun <3

Fortnite remains a touchy topic between them

This is so so so delightful. Thank you for sharing your thoughts!! This is always such a delight to read. I don’t mind the long asks!! But I will tag it as “long post” for any followers who want to avoid them! Win win for everyone.

[roscgcld]

HEADCANONS + GOJO SATORU || sweet but ‘scary’ s/o

request: How would Satour react if crush/future s/o was sweet and caring person, but could turn into a deadly assassin badass when they need too?

note: i feel like you’re a returning requester because the of the typo for gojo’s name lol. I see you reappearing in my inbox so much. i’m chilled with it, it makes me happy that you enjoy my writing enough to come back c: i did change the request a little cause i couldn’t finish it after writing half of the headcanon lol - so i hope you don’t mind c:

i based this around this post!

pronouns: them/they

everyone knows you as the ‘sweet and warm sensei’ that everyone can turn to when things start to get too much

a parental figure that will listen to their issues without judgement, or feeling the need to give them advice; just someone who they can just rant to without needing to hear anything back in reply 

on days where they are just overwhelmed with work, you’d come into the study room with bags of snacks, asking if they want to go to the rec room in their dorm for a well deserved break

you’re the same for your co-workers/fellow graduated classmates - when you were a student in the college, you are considered as the sweet and caring senpai who bakes snacks for everyone

so you cannot believe their shock when you had gotten together with gojo - to which everyone threatened gojo at least twice to take care of you; unless he wants to feel their wrath 

and i headcanon that even though gojo always claims that he is the ‘strongest sorcerer alive’ - an angry shoko never fails to send shivers of fear up his spine

but in general, after awhile they realised that somehow, you managed to tame the ‘wild and rambunctious’ gojo satoru into becoming your doting and ever loving boyfriend. who is still a huge pain in the ass, but at least he is loyal lol

you’d help to do the group laundry on your off days because you hate the idea that everyone is running out of fresh clothes, whilst teaching nanami and haibara how to use the washer and dryer (cause nanami gotta learn how to be the perfect man from someone)

on days when you’re on dinner duty, no one misses them because you cook the best and most warmest meals for them all - makes them miss home a little less

although you always have this super sweet and caring front, there was a side to you that gojo had never told anyone of; it’s nothing bad. but when he first saw it, he was definitely taken back

he witnessed it when you are sent on a mission together - there were a group of troublemaker kids who had entered an abandoned hospital that had been inhabited by a Special Grade that seemed to be trapping them inside

so you two were sent to go and retrieving the kids if they are alive, but your job is to exorcise the curse no matter the outcome 

gojo knew that you hated that answer, so he allows you to drag him about the many hallways of the school, trying to find the young kids before the curse gets to them

when you found them, your motherly side came out as you fussed over the sniffling and crying kids; using the small first aid kit you had on your person of all time to help them clean and bandage any scratches and wounds they had on their body

gojo was annoyed that you seemed so focused on the kids, but he still stood guard like you had asked him too; arms crossed and an annoyed pout resting on his face

he was about to whine to you again, asking when you’re done when he freeze at the sudden strong source of Cursed Energy that was radiating from somewhere

he had just turned to warn you when a sudden blur passed him, causing him to blink his eyes in shock as he glances over at where you were moments ago; only to be faced with equally shocked kids

“wha-” he mutters before he turned to poke his head out the classroom you had taken refuse in, just in time to see you with your weapon drawn and already stabbing the Curse without hesitation

he was stunned at the sight of his lover, his sweet and kind bunny, going absolutely ham on the Curse; exorcising it within a second

gojo just stared at you in shock, which was rare as it is; his mouth parted in awe as he watches as you dust yourself off and made your way back towards him; your kind smile painted on your features once more

“well - shall we leave then?”

gojo had gone back to the college with you after you had dropped the kids off with the cops; unsure of how to bring up at how different you were when you are serious and have your head in the game

because of this, he had never really told anyone about this side of you; since he really saw no reason to reveal it. he just learns to accept it, and that it is just another part of you that he loves as much as he loves you

fast forward a few years, now you and gojo have been together ever since the third year of high school; having raised megumi together as a couple, and had officially became one of the teachers of the school

many of the students had yet to see this ‘side’ side of yours. whilst people like nanami and ijichi had seen it first hand; and had both unanimously decided to never piss you off

however, your beloved students just saw you as the sweet sensei who made them muffins and cakes on their birthdays, who teaches them things they’d need to know to become an adult

you’re a familiar pillar that they can lean on during the darkest of times; so they never believe when Yaga-sensei or Nanami try to tell them that beneath that kindness there is something that they should watch out for

the students cannot imagine their kind and soft-spoken sensei to be this scary killing machine that is known to be one of the best sorcerers to deal with heavily infested areas

they had no reason to believe so - until Yaga-sensei had approved for them to shadow Gojo-sensei and you for your latest mission

they stood at the side with Nanami and another First Grade Sorcerer to watch as the both of you entered the abandoned office block on the outskirts of tokyo

you had noticed the students, and after giving them a warm smile and wave you and gojo made your way inside of the building as the curtain was completed; blocking the outside world from looking in

at first the students were not sure what they were actually waiting for, since they couldn’t really see any action from where they are standing - which was the entire reason for their trip 

they questioned nanami as to why they had to stand at such a distance away, but nanami just held his hand out and told them to be patient and wait for a few more moments

suddenly there was a huge bang! before what seemed to be a figure shooting out from the exploding rubble; a manic glint in your eyes as you spun your weapon in your hand so it pointed downward as you started to fall 

the students watched in horror and shock whilst you seemed to be having the time of your life, gojo just standing behind you with a soft grin as he protected your back; yet made no real move to get in your way 

they watched in horror at the sigh of you exorcising the Curses around you without hesitation, a dark and determined look shining in your eyes. a far cry from the sweet smile you always have on your face

no one knew what to say as they continue to watch as you exorcise the masses of Curses. too shocked to really process everything happening before them. even megumi was stunned, since he had never seen this ‘dark’ side of you before

whilst gojo looks like he was having a blast, even cheering you on from the sidelines, nanami was just shaking his head with a tired sigh

“so much for ‘educational purposes’,” nanami hummed tiredly as he turned to the other first grade sorcerer, who just smiles back in response. “shall we grabbed some hot chocolate for the kids? there is a cafe that we passed whilst driving over here.”

when the other person agreed the two of them started to usher the kids away, nanami waving off gojo’s whine of how he was going to be missing the best parts

“you fawn over your lover by yourself, gojo - i am going to make sure the kids don’t go into further shock then they already are.”

© roscgcld — all rights reserved to me, rose, the author and creator of these works. do not repost/translate/claim my work as yours on any platform.

[ashdumpsterpile]

I know you talk abou st*cky in the interracial ships stuff, but can we talk about st*ny? Iron husbands is literally right there, but I also always sees Rhodey as Tonys moral support only. And ik Tony is very shippable with most characters, but the fact his ship is Rhodey is one of the lowest ships in ao3 (ironstrange, winteriron and god forbid stark*r all had more fics in ao3).. It's pretty telling this side also has racism problems...

I'll go ahead and answer this here, but letting y'all know that I do have a marvel sideblog if you want to hit me up there (@themarvelarchives).

Hey, I'm going to ramble for a good minute.

So after I posted my very incoherent, controversial take on St*cky vs SamBucky, there were a ton of ppl who came onto anon saying that St*cky shippers were racist. I think I only answered a few, but y'all were pretty insistent on it. I personally have not observed that St*cky shippers are so I'm not calling anyone out on that side of the fandom for that.

I also did not call out anyone on this side of the fandom bc that's not what my meta was about. I think I mentioned maybe once or twice in the whole post that there was underlying racist in the fandom, but since you asked, we can talk about it here.

Covert Bigotry In Fandom Spaces.

To understand what's going on in the MCU, we have to first look at what I call "woke-queer" fandom.

So "Woke-Queer" Spaces is the phenomenon where certain fandom members like to call ppl out on their bigotry, while covertly harboring their own queerphobia/racism/etc. An example of this that we're all familiar with is TERFS and how they like to claim that they are progressive and woke, while also claiming that trans women are fake and trans men are sexist.

How this translates to fandom, however, is the hypocrisy that is cancellation and callout culture.

For example, Supernatural in particular is a fandom that likes to call out the writers on their homophobia and racism, and yet, somehow, the fandom is chalk full of homophobia and racism. If you want to read more about this, here is a truly excellent article from the perspective of a queer woman of color.

Moving on, I've also talked in a previous meta post, on the internalized acephobia that exploded in 2019 after Good Omens was released. Rather than reiterate everything I said in that post, I'll just leave it at this: the controversy in the Good Omens fandom can be summed up by the fact that queer audiences are claiming that Ineffable Husbands is the wrong kind of queer. The hypocrisy oozes off the screen, doesn't it?

A final way this viably translates to fandom, is in how the Doctor Who fandom evolved over time.

So Steven Moffat takes over as head writer and showrunner in 2010. It's a new series, a new Doctor, a new Tardis, and new branding. He steps up the action, changes the color grating, and raises the stakes. Women are sexier, the Doctor is smarter (and more of an asshole, but that's another meta post), and every companion comes with their own impossible mystery that makes them Special™.

Series 5-10 got tons of woke points for having lesbian characters, an episode where the Doctor is homoerotic with James Corden, and an underlying trans narrative with the Master's reincarnation. What a lot of people forget, however, is that his series was incredibly sexiest, incredibly lesbian/biphobic, and basically turned the Doctor into everyone's fantasy sex-object.

This, unfortunately, brought out the worst of the fandom. There was RTD Era vs Moffat Era wars exploding in certain corners, TenxRose shippers vs ElevenxRiver shippers.

What does this have to do with covert racism in fandom cultures though?

Hnnngng ok, so back in RTD era's we get Martha Jones, the Actual Best Companion On The Entire Show. Except for the fact, of course, that she is written to be in love with the doctor. She's a brilliant character--smart, sassy, flawed, funny, flirtatious--and her entire plotline is reduced down to a school-girl crush on a white man.

She doesn't do well with fans, they scrap her after one season.

We move on to Donna Noble (The Other Actual Best Companion On The Entire Show) and RTD's era ends with them scraping her too and regenerating David Tennant's Doctor.

It will be five more series (not seasons, SERIES) until Doctor Who will have another black companion--who gets extra points for being gay--only to fall victim to "bury your gays" at the end of the season (but not really bc no one stays dead on Doctor Who).

The fandom's reception of Martha Jones was historically bad. The comparisons to her predecessor, Rose Tyler, were rampant and everyone was finding a reason to hate her.

The fandom's reception to Bill Potts was also historically bad, as everyone was screaming that she was being written for more "woke points" and that they wanted Clara back.

Fandom has a historically bad reputation of being problematic and, I would argue, the majority of it has to do with these toxic undertones of bigotry that slip under the radar. "Woke-queer" spaces, as I call them, are these instances above where spaces that claim to be inclusive of gender/orientation/race are covertly bigoted.

Marvel and Cancelling

Now is an excellent time to talk about the MCU.

Anthony Mackie (Sam Wilson) has recently come under a lot of criticism from fandom members for shutting down shipper speculation.

"The idea of two guys being friends and loving each other in 2021 is a problem because of the exploitation of homosexuality. [...] something as pure and beautiful as homosexuality has been exploited by people who are trying to rationalize themselves."

I can't find the rest of the quote, but Mackie goes on further to say that it was important to him to portray "a sensitive, masculine figure" without insinuating that there was romance involved.

Woke culture lost it's shit. Everyone was suddenly claiming that Mackie was calling them exploitative for shipping a gay ship as a queer audience, which could not have been further from the case.

Mackie actually makes some very excellent points in that sensitivity is not gay/queer. Woke culture loves to rag on Toxic Masculinity, but the minute someone plays a character who is loving and sensitive with no queer narrative in mind, they are immediately canceled.

What Am I On About

Okay, let's actually address what your ask was about, Nonnie. You pointed out--rather truthfully--that it is unfair to call-out racism on one side of the fandom, while ignoring it on the other side.

Well, I've gone back through my St*cky vs. SamBucky analysis (which is incoherent at best, I apologize for that) and I see maybe once instance where I called out fandom members for being racist. Here's what I had to say about racism:

"[...] Iron Husbands is a rarepair, probably because it’s an interracial ship."

"[there is] nothing wrong with shipping two white men, but it does become a problem when you ignore/bash POC/interracial ships to the determinant of your own white ship."

And then there was the post you brought up where I addressed interracial ships in the fandom. That one is probably more relevant to this topic, to be honest, as I actually addressed fandom racism there. I assume that your reason for bringing up Stony is because it's a ship that is more relevant to my side of the fandom, HOWEVER, the reason I highlighted Stucky instead was because I was comparing the fact that they've both been around the same amount of time and are relationships that feature the protagonist and their best friend.

You brought up St*ny in the ask, however, so I'm going to talk about St*ny for a minute.

As someone who never has nor will ship St*ny, it never even occurred to me that some of the problem behind the Iron Husbands tag being so small is because everyone ships the white, boring ship. You brought up a very valid point, but because I was never in that part of the fandom, I can't really speak to any possible underlying racism there, besides what I've already said above.

I would be interested in hearing a St*ony shipper or ex-St*ony shippers thought on this, but sadly I don't know any. If you have any more thoughts regarding this, Nonnie, pls drop back into my inbox.

You do make some excellent points in this ask though, and I would like to talk about racism on my side of the fandom.

So back to Mackie and his Twitter cancellation. Notice that Disney made him address the rumors and not his co-star, Sebastian Stan. Anthony Mackie is put on blast and made to answer fan demands and receives backlash, while Sebastian Stan gets to fly under the rader. This is not, by the way, a criticism of Stan, but instead of the blatant racism Disney has been displaying over the past few years.

How this ties in with the rest of my post has to do with my "woke-queer" spaces bit. The outcry across the MCU fandom over Mackie was swift and unforgiving. He was cancelled on charges of homophobia and bigotry--all the while these same fans turn a blind eye to any queer interpretation of other interracial ships and discourse in their own fandom.

The racism that I'm speaking about, of course, is an almost passive racism. Of course if you don't ship a specific ship for reasons other than their race, it's perfectly fine. It's okay not to ship Iron Husbands or SamBucky or any other interracial fandom ships. However, the distinct lack of shippers in the fandom IS telling because there are people who would ship that exact ship if not for the fact that one of men is black.

I don't have much more to say about this except to thank you for bringing it up and for listening to my long rambling post.

(Feel free to bug me about Tony Stark, MCU ships, MCU Meta and anything you want to talk me about on this blog and @themarvelarchives.)

[drwcn]

问第？你有没有写错字？哎呀，你可不要这么小气吗？蓝二不能可以随随便便翻译成”lan two”。这才是我对你的帖子的问题。随着你这样说的话，我们就把他叫做”blue two”好吗？虽然你说得不错，蓝二公子和蓝二有缺别，但你也不可以把蓝二变成了”lan two”。蓝二有”蓝二公子”的意思，只是短一点，和，我确认，没那么尊重。

还有，你也是华人，说自己能讲得很流利。我就问你，你怎么能看到别人嘻嘻哈哈地把“蓝”姓名弄成蓝色的蓝的事情，却闭上两眼假装看不见？你难道心里没有一丝的为难、一丝的委屈吗？

（CONT）算了吧，我也不想跟你吵了。我从来没说过我是个中国人，本人只是个新加坡华人。我看到帖子，感到心里有点不舒服，决定和作者谈一谈。而且最近有了很多小看华人，歧视华人，不尊重华人文化等等的人，所以当我看到你帖子，我心里自然有点难受。你不相信我？我无论怎样生了你的气也没用。其实，我想，我越谈，各方面就会越生气。所以就留在这里吧。希望你以后不会这么容易火冒三丈，多听听对方的解释。

Hold on a second -

For the onlookers: alright friends, most of this will be in Chinese so English speaking friends can tldr this ridiculous drama at the bottom. In case you didn't catch up on this thing that came out of left field, the origin ask is [here]. Fair warning, im about to go full bitch, so steer clear friends if you're only here for the weird au fanfics. Apologies to those in the firing range in advance. If you unfollow me, I understand, thank you for your support thus far.

Alright -

兄弟，开头就用autocorrect犯的错误来怼我，多没劲儿呀。有本事来个人身攻击，那多刺激。我刚才还在上班没空跟你计较，不过这场架您可躲不了，火��你点的.

1. 您说 You said：" 蓝二不能可以随随便便翻译成”lan two”

天哪，麻烦您找碴儿先看一下我的blog： #culture， #language 都是我平时用来给网友解释中华文化和语言的hashtag。 那个Lan 2 的帖子根本就是个shitpost！！！江澄喊蓝忘记“蓝二”其实就是一个很搞笑的小细节，一个英文字母忽略的细节。我就想着小的时候看《铁齿铜牙纪晓岚》，纪晓岚叫和珅 “和二”， 真的是经典！我只是想简单的翻译一下给不会中文的网友们分享，怎么就到您这儿变成了我不尊重华人文化了？？？

2. 您再说 You continued to say：“ 你怎么能看到别人嘻嘻哈哈地把“蓝”姓名弄成蓝色的蓝的事情，却闭上两眼假装看不见 ”

What on earth are you talking about????? 我真的一脑门子问号。且不说我根本不记得任何人把蓝姓和蓝色弄混一事 （我帖子上的comment不是每一个我都follow or check out)，拜托您我只是一个普通网民，不是tumbler的中华民族文化代言人和纪律监督员。这网上的drama和wank还少吗？我要是没事儿一天到晚见事儿就掺和，那我就甭上班，甭睡觉，甭吃饭了。我在网上跟一些无关紧要的人多费口舌，是能治病还是能发财？？Ironically I realize that's exactly what I'm doing with you right now but let's just say today I'm making an exception.

3. 您怎么能说 How could you say：“ 我从来没说过我是个中国人，本人只是个新加坡华人 ”

妈呀我眼瞎了？？底下这人不是您呀？？？说 “as a Chinese person who is also fluent in Chinese " 不是您？？？

没关系，您不是中国人，我可是土生土长的老北京。每个地区说的普通话不太一样。新加坡的国语和中国大陆的国语有一定的区别，二个地方的人民有他么自己独特的表达方式，这个很正常。简单来说就像英英和美英不一样，是一个道理。要是说陈情令，那是大陆拍的片子。他们里头用的词句是我更有发言权还是您更有发言全呢？

4. 您又说 You also said: “而且最近有了很多小看华人，歧视华人，不尊重华人文化等等的人，所以当我看到你帖子，我心里自然有点难受 .”

This one I'm gonna answer in English bc I think you make a good point. It's true. Racism towards Chinese people and Asian Hate in general is real right now, especially given the pandemic. Seeing posts that disrespect your culture is very distressful; I'm sorry you had to experience this. But you don't know anything about me. You saw one post I made, which is not disrespectful in any way, it's just a silly BUT ACCURATE translation, and decided that I was someone who didn't respect Chinese culture? You didn't even bother to check me out!! I have a navigation page!! I've answered so many questions and made so many posts about Chinese language, culture, cultural appropriation. I'm a weird person okay I admit it, but of all the things I could be accused of on this hellsite, I didn't think disrespecting Chinese culture was gonna be one of them?!

5. 您还说You then said : “我无论怎样生了你的气也没用。其实，我想，我越谈，各方面就会越生气。所以就留在这里吧。希望你以后不会这么容易火冒三丈，多听听对方的解释 ” - Translation: It's pointless to be angry with you. Actually, I think, the more we discuss, each side will get angrier. So let's just leave it here. Hope in the future you won't be so explosive and aggravated, and listen to the other side explain.

Son of gun. 我真是哭笑不得。您这人怎么不讲理呀？？？？我过的好好的，光天化日不分青红皂白没事儿到我的inbox来挑事儿是您吧？？？主动来烦人的是您吧？我没招您没惹您，在我的这个角落里享受着我的无脑偶像剧，写着我的垃圾补脑番外，忽然从天而降一位判官，跟吃饱了撑的一样 accusing me of "[...]The fact that you’ve reduced chinese language and its culture to something that must conform by English standards is just saddening. I understand that you probably mean well, but please do research to avoid making such insensitive and offensive remarks." And then telling me hope you won't be so angry???? Uh, classic gaslight behaviour my man. Was I suppose to ... not...defend myself????

不过做人总得有点自知之明。不错，我脾气是不好；今儿遇上我算您倒霉。Inbox我关了anon，省得给自己找气受。要是不服气，摘了你的面具，姑奶奶我奉陪到底。那句话怎么说来着：人不犯我我不犯人。

To onlookers who are still hanging around:

TLDR: So like...how do I explain this situation with a metaphor. Okay...so imagine a British (UK) person made a shit post very briefly explaining a language joke about something on Downton Abbey to non-English speakers, and then a Canadian/American/Australian (sorry guys not to call out anyone this is just a metaphor) came into their inbox unprovoked and proceeded to accuse them of disrespecting Anglo culture. It's not a perfect metaphor (probably not the most politically correct), but it's 95% what happened.

[bisexualsmackingnoises]

Date anon again! Have you posted your ocs?? I don't think I've seen them srry if someone already asked about them!

Hey date anon! Thank you so much for your ask about my OCs, it means a lot to me that people are interested in them! I had this laying around in my inbox for an era and a half, but I thought now would be the perfect time to release them!

If anyone wants to learn more about these babes, just ask! I put a lot of time and love into them.

HAPPY 150+ FOLLOWERS, EVERYONE!

My (Main) JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: Vento Aureo OCs!

Daphne Libertina (she/her)

Say HIII GIRLIEEE to my first and most developed Vento Aureo OC, Daphne! She’s your classic Y2K aesthetic airhead archetype. While designing her, I found Bimbo TikTok and fell in love with the aesthetic and the ideology. Because of this, a lot of the ditzy behaviour I worked into Daphne’s personality and design is inspired by Chrissy Chlapecka’s New Age Bimbo. She’s kind of a hyperfeminine vessel for whatever “girly” sentiments I have as well. I’m not that outwardly feminine in my daily life (I have a gender crisis every second week, subscribe for more!), so Daph was an experiment in expressing it elsewhere. This resulted in a newfound obsession with the colour pink and a renewed love for characters like Elle Woods and Cher Horowitz.

You might know her from my absolute banger of an art debut, the “Nectar” post*. Her besties include @blackevermore’s Chiara, @amarettocoffee’s Gina, and @bucciaratis-titty-window’s Strelitzia. Love ya galz, xoxo!

Stand: Scarlet Letter (Namesake: The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne [Book]). Alternatively**, Teen Idle (Namesake: Teen Idle by MARINA [Song])

*DISCLAIMER: She does not actually do… that. Even if @bucciaratis-titty-window says otherwise. Don’t listen to her. (That being said, take a wild guess who I ship her with.)

**“Why does she have two stand names?” Her stand was developed as SL but TI adheres to the music reference stand criteria. That being said, it’s a creative choice that I use SL regardless. Both pieces of media play a huge part in her foundation.

Capriccio “Crema” Solitario (they/them)

Described often by my friends as a feral noodle, Capriccio—codename Crema*—is my compulsory “Hey, I kinda wanna bang literally all of La Squadra???” self insert that gives me intense gender envy. Capri started out as a joke character, as their old name was “La Squadra Thot” or “LST” for short (take from that what you will). This was eventually shortened to “La Thotra” … until I gave them a tragic backstory and a real personality. That being said, their base function was still present in their later design: they were La Squadra Esecuzioni’s stress toy for a little while, but eventually settled down with two of my favourite assassin degenerates and holds their own as a valuable member of the team.

Stand: Mindless Self Indulgence/MSI (Namesake: Mindless Self Indulgence [Band])

*I have a headcanon that La Squadra’s “names” are all codenames, and that they have perfectly reasonable—if not slightly referential—normal names.

Lucetta “Lulu” Vitali (she/her/they/them)

Lucetta is probably the closest OC I have to a genuine self insert—she’s the most like me out of all of my JoJo OCs, anyway. Funnily enough, she doesn’t have that much development outside of her relationship dynamic with her long-term boyfriend*. I’m still trying to figure out how to translate all of me—or at least the key parts of me—into her and how she lives. Stay tuned for that. For now, I’ll bet that she’s working an entry level position in the writing industry, a projection of my future (hopefully).

Dierdre Darling (she/her)

Stand: N/A—just a regular ol’ person.

*For the record, I'm actually currently single & happy that way. Lulu, however, is dating her high school sweetheart. Guess who!

Mild gore warning on this one, she's... special.

Dierdre came to me in a moment of exercise delirium while listening to Blood Eater by Mom, and was inspired by the way zombies work in the TV show iZombie. Well, that’s how her stand works, anyway. She began Araki-style, power first and character second. She’s a shrill, unhinged woman with an insatiable craving for human flesh, blood and bone. She’s kinda like Secco, but worse. And yes, those teeth are purposefully, cosmetically sharpened. Also, a Unita Speciale member. Ask @bucciaratis-titty-window who babysits her.

She’s not exactly “with” anyone right now, but the joke at the beginning of her development was that she’d fallen hopelessly in love with a man who could create the rot and decay of time before her very eyes… oh, did I mention she’s fascinated by decay?

Stand: Living Dead Girl (Namesake: Living Dead Girl by Rob Zombie [Song])

[miabrown007]

Fic Writer Questions

I wasn't tagged but this looked fun so I did it anyway ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

How many works do you have on AO3?

30

What’s your total AO3 word count?

148,575 - my first multichapter literally takes up half this word count

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

Harry Potter (a handful of fics in Hungarian, they aren't on AO3), Miraculous Ladybug, ATLA (I have a half-finished Zutara LS fic, that counts, right? T_T). So that's 3.

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Hiding in Plain Sight - holy hell, this fic ran wild. thank you to the blogger on ML Tik Tok who gave it a shoutout!

don't ask questions you don't wanna know - this fic is the prototype of my current style/interests. it's fluffy, it's dumb (affectionate), it's identity shenanigans all over the place

17 days, 2 hours and some odd minutes - a fic inspired by annascribble's drawing. just prpr mutual pining 🥰

Never Have I Ever Met Idiots Like These Two - drinking games and the kids being dumb. I'm sensing a pattern here 😂

Five Times The Love-Square Watched ‘Solitude’ (And One Time They Didn’t) - every side of the LS, with added Multichat and Snekmouse. as a treat. and because the LS was made for identity shenanigans and dramatic irony

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

I try to respond to everything but it isn't always going great. (Like, for example, 'I'm a few months behind right now' not great.) Surprisingly it takes more time to answer comments that I really want to answer because they are very thoughtful or bring up a good point or are just generally really nice, because I want to answer them properly, which results in getting buried in my inbox >_> Sorry about that!

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Can I just link a whole series? No? What a bummer, because it's sure hard to choose from what are you after? some kind of disaster? (I just linked it, huh *evil cackling*)

The first one that came to mind is get away (that is all I can do) but probably only because this one is my favourite from this series.

Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

Don't really. The only fic I have written that uses characters from another franchise is Lost & Found and they don't have a dialogue line.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Not hate per se, but I have a fic bookmarked with a disclaimer that didn't do wonders to my confidence. But for the most part, everyone has been super kind to me in the ML fandom, which I really appreciate! <3

Do you write smut? If so what kind?

I am trying (I currently have a WIP that contains some) but it's super hard y'all! Major kudos to anyone who can do it!

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Thankfully not that I know of.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, someone translated Five Times The Love-Square Watched ‘Solitude’ (And One Time They Didn’t) into Russian 🥺

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes. I've tried to collaborate on fics with my friends multiple times, out of which one attempt has been completed. Though the others are outlined so they are technically WIPs, right? 😅

What’s your all-time favourite ship?

Hands down the love-square. They got me back into writing fic after years, and they can be not one, not two, but five (and counting) different ships! Like, who does that?!

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

*cracks knuckles* The things I seriously consider WIPs get finished. (At least I hope so! I really don't like to abandon fics, so usually, I just don't post them until they are finished. The only exception to this being my Marichat fake dating/Ladrien establish relationship fic, from one year ago when I didn't yet know better. I love that fic and really want to finish it, but I was 20k in when it went haywire and rewriting all that is- T_T)

What are your writing strengths?

I think I'm good at keeping in mind the characters' different perspectives while writing, and how they'd interpret the same information differently based on their prior knowledge, which is a great help when writing identity shenanigans/misunderstandings (my preferred source of conflict when writing fluff, so it doesn't get boring or depressive).

And I'd like to think I'm also decent at hiding details in the story -- be those canon elements in an AU, intentionally recurring or paralleling themes and phrases, or foreshadowing.

What are your writing weaknesses?

I am a compulsive editor and thus a painfully slow writer.

Also, verbs. I just do not know enough of them (or English words in general, but it's a problem mostly surfacing with verbs), which results in having to describe them in a roundabout way, with much more words than I'd need otherwise.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I'm not a big fan. I think there are better ways to let the audience know that conversation is going on in another language, like putting it in italics. I find it annoying if I can't understand an exchange, especially if it's important to the plot, so even providing translation in the author's notes works better in my opinion than leaving it at that.

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Harry Potter.

What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Probably love is an open door because I think that's my best writing yet 🥰

This has been fun, so tagging @valiantlyjollynightmare, @fragileizy, @silvmoonsky, @dot-dotdots and @peachcitt if you want to do it! <3

[sinsbymanka]

Writing Tag Game

Okay listen I’m on vacation XD hence why I’m ignoring everyone’s tags/taking forever to respond. But I’ve been tagged in this A LOT and I really liked it/wanted to do it so thank you to everyone who tagged me (oh my god I’m so sorry if I missed one of you there were SO MANY): @noire-pandora, @in-arlathan, @thevikingwoman, @morganlefaye79, @elveny, @kunstpause, @pikapeppa

I’m not tagging anyone because I’m tagging everyone since I’m too lazy to find my tag list (I’m on VACATION). If you’ve not gotten tagged and wanted to do this, say I tagged you. 

How many works do you have on Ao3?

147 - I have 145 linked to my profile and two in the anonymous collection. 

What's your total Ao3 wordcount?

1,468,248. Almost 1.5 million!! 

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Of Miracles and Heroes (FenHawke, Cadash/Varric, Varania/Blackwall): 269

Interspecies Relationships Have Their Ups and Downs (Shakarian): 145

Don’t Make it Hawkeward (Varric/Hawke): 135

The Ambassador’s Vices (Josephine/Adaar): 111

The Girl with the Arrow Tattoo (Cadash/Varric): 101

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do (but - to be honest - it takes me FOREVER). I love comments. It’s so much easier to not leave comments than leave comments, so every time someone leaves one I’m blown away. I feel like - for leaving me a comment - you’re definitely owed an answer! I do apologize that it takes me awhile though - I am very bad at answering because they mean a lot to me and I get easily overwhelmed by the AO3 inbox I don’t know why. Blame anxiety. 

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

I’ll be honest, I don’t like angsty endings so I don’t have many of them. By far the angstiest ending I have is Flowers, Lies, and Forgiveness. This is a Bianca Davri/Varric Tethras fic set during the final act of DA2. I wrote it from Bianca’s POV - showing Varric unraveling under the pressure of Kirkwall and Bianca’s complicated feelings about infidelity to her husband who clearly cares about her as well. I wrote it for @hollyand-writes who always lets me lean into the tragic “fucked upness” of the pairing when I’m feeling like making Varric suffer.  

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending

I prefer happy endings so almost EVERYTHING has a happy ending. My favorite endings, so far, are for Cheating the Dread Wolf, which is my Varric/Cadash/Solas polycule (or as I like to refer to it - Solas has a dwarf kink) and The Viscount’s Mistress which is my Hurt/Comfort Cadash/Varric Trespasser bullshit. 

Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you've written?

I have not written crossovers - but I am very into AUs in another setting that belongs to a different fictional universe. Most recently I got back into my Downton Abbey bullshit and wrote Flappers for Fen’harel which is basically a Downton Abbey AU Solas/Cadash and I’m not taking comments about the outrageousness of it. 

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Yep. Honestly though? Over the two years I’ve been active in Fandom, the shitty comments can be counted on one hand and usually came from the same people over and over again, who are easily blocked, and should stop seeking out clearly labeled content they don’t like. Me and my work are not for everyone - that’s REALLY okay. I’ve blocked people for no other reason than making things I don’t like - that doesn’t mean they’re bad people. 

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

GOD DO I.

I am extremely sex and kink positive. Because of this - a lot of my work involves sex in some way or another. I think sex is a beautiful part of many (although not all) relationships, and that it’s frequently glossed over in mainstream media (particularly queer, kinky, and polyam sex). 

This ranges from sort of vanilla slow burns (My Cole/Bea fic, Compassion for an Assassin, has smut which hasn’t been posted yet. It’s Cole’s first time and is fairly vanilla and romantic, and occurs approximately 40k into the fic) to some pretty dubious consent near 24/7 dom/sub dynamics with BDSM kinks (I’ve written JUST as much of the Sereda/Gorim problematic smut as @jarakrisafis has in our series Forced Moves). 

There’s very few kinks I’m not willing to touch at least to try out - even if I end up not liking them. And the ones that aren’t for me are 100% allowed to exist and I will fight for them to the bloody end. My only recommendation is CLEARLY labeling your shit and not being afraid to add a tag if someone asks you to. 

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I’m aware of? I’ve seen ideas I’ve tried on picked up by other people - but I don’t consider that stealing and it’s hard to trace “who has been inspired by who” because we ALL have been inspired by thousands of other people and frankly more stuff for me when I pull you over to my weird AUs and rarepairs. 

I also think that’s a huge part of not getting stolen - I’ve got so much weird niche shit that only a couple people read that stealing from me is going to most likely be caught IMMEDIATELY the audience is so small. 

Have you ever had a fic translated?

I don’t believe so!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes! I’ve got some co-written secret smut with @blarfkey which almost nobody has seen, I’ve borrowed @tightassets Hawke, Lavellan, and Shepard for fics that she has illustrated, borrowed @tuffypelly‘s Adaars for some great fics, and my most ambitious project - the Forced Moves series with @jarakrisafis. It started out as us just exchanging gifts back and forth but we’ve wrangled it into Gambits and Countergambits, an Aeducan-origin prequel, that I’m VERY proud of. 

I love co-writing very much, but it’s very important to find the right partner and for it to be someone you trust completely. 

What's your all time favourite ship?

This is a stupidly hard question because I am, at heart, a multi-shipper. 

I love Varric/Hawke and Varric/Cadash. I’m also a sucker for Solas/Cadash. My fandom pool noodle is Varric/Cadash/Solas which I adore, and I’m very fond of Cole/Cadash. 

Most recently I’ve been DEEP in Aeducan/Gorim Saelac, Bhelen/Rica/Vartag, and Aeducan/Brosca feels. Dwarf origins are the best origins in my opinion and those characters are PERFECT. 

What's a WIP you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

I fully plan on finishing everything. My writing style changed a lot, for the better, in a short period of time. I need to integrate my old style/new style and had to get a pep talk about how to do that. Now I’m ready to try as soon as I finish Compassion for an Assassin. 

What are your writing strengths? 

I write very sexy, hot smut. I also really like playing with character voice and making sure I get them “right” so I do a lot of experimenting before publishing a new character for the first time. 

I struggle to write action scenes - it’s like pulling fucking teeth - but people really LOVE my action scenes and they read well. So that’s something I’m proud of even if it feels like doing fucking pull ups. 

What are your writing weaknesses?

I never learned anything. My experiences with English and writing teachers were overwhelmingly negative. I’m unsure if I’m just not cut out for classes or if they were that bad, but I always left feeling like there was one “right” way to do it, and everything I liked was “bad”, so what was the point of “learning” anything? 

It turns out there’s this very pompous, pretentious thought process in writing where people “assume” things must be done, but GOOD writing teachers teach you the rules and then how to break them. I either never had a good writing teacher or got too intimidated to give them a chance before bouncing. 

So I’m exceedingly self-taught. I lack the vocabulary to discuss plot structure, characterization, grammar, etc. I instinctively know most of these things based on trial and error and reading, but I didn’t learn them and I miss a lot of nuance in the rules, but until recently I was still too intimidated and unsure of myself to admit that or take it seriously. 

So - my defense mechanism is NOT taking ANYTHING seriously. If my writing is a joke to me, it’s gotta be a joke to everyone else, but that’s been a shield to hide behind instead of being thoughtful about things. I’m here to have fun, yes, but there’s nothing wrong with learning a technique to the art. 

I’ve learned - mostly thanks to @blarfkey who is an amazing person and a wonderful teacher - that I am a good writer based on my self-teaching. And being intimidated of people who throw around impressive sounding words is a weakness that I am working on. 

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? 

Use sparingly and with good reason. It should be short and explained later or clear from context. 

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Harry Potter on message boards back in the fucking day. Thankfully none of it exists anywhere anymore. 

What's your favourite fic you've written?

This is such a sappy answer and I’m so sorry. My favorite things have been written for and because of people I love and care about. When I read them, I’m not just reading the story, but remembering the relationships I’ve made and how important they are. 

So, my top three fics for THAT reason: 

1. Cheating the Dread Wolf - written for @blarfkey who inspired the idea and ruthlessly encouraged me to make it happen. This fic was so healing for me because it heavily features Fatherhood within it - and I lost my father in June 2020. I don’t know if I’d have been able to do it without her and it was so important for me to do. 

2. Gambits and Countergambits - written with @jarakrisafis and the culmination of a years worth of gifting shit back and forth and crafting a shared universe. The worldbuilding, smut, relationships, EVERYTHING about this fic is so deeply and passionately cared about by both of us and to our knowledge it is completely, totally unique.  

3. Relentless, Ridiculous, and Rakish - one of my only primarily gen-fics focusing on a forming brother/sister relationship between Maria Cadash and @tuffypelly‘s Otsar Adaar. I very much enjoyed writing it for her <3 

And then my overall favorite fic: 

The Viscount’s Mistress: I have a lot of opinions about how fanfiction treats the anchor’s meltdown and the aftermath. It’s one of the things in DAI that resonated with me SO much as someone who lives with chronic pain and a disability. I loved the fact my OC was in the same shoes and STILL saving the world. This is very much a fic that explores all the dark sides of trauma, pain, and the mental health effects of it. But it ends on a happy and hopeful note.  

[zukkaoru]

Fic Writer Review

tagged by @bisexualpercabeth tysm for the tag!! <3

1. how many works do you have on AO3? 85 lol

2. what’s your total AO3 word count? 489,407.. don't ask how much of that is just from the past year lol

3. how many fandoms have you written for and what are they? i have posted fics for 20 different fandoms on ao3 and i am not going going to list them all out but my top five are atla, 0uat, tlok, h$mtmt$, and tales of arcadia

4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. plum blossom 2. you clutched my brain and eased my ailing 3. my calamitous love & insurmountable grief 4. five times ryan came out (and one time he couldn't) 5. feels like love

5. do you respond to comments, why or why not? i usually try to but sometimes i simply do not know what to say. or i let too many comments build up in my inbox and end up just not responding bc i'm overwhelmed oops

6. what’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending? uh. it's gotta be one of my old 0uat fics bc i don't usually like to write angsty endings anymore skdgfdj i'm not sure i want to link to any specific oneshot but if you're curious you can look back through my ao3 ig there's also looked me in the eye and told me you would never go away but that's part of a series so the entire coherent story doesn't end angstily lol

(continued under the cut)

7. do you write crossovers? if so what is the craziest one you’ve written? i don't really anymore but oh boy. the craziest one i've ever written? one of my friends and i started writing a fic back when we were like ten and we literally called it The Megacrossover (the mega for short) bc we just. shoved as many fandoms as we could in that thing. it started out just being a pjo / hp / thg crossover where the characters got reaped for a hunger games based on their cabin at camp half-blood but then we ended up including doctor who and 0uat in the plot to get everyone out of the arena, and then we brought in olaf for some reason (?) and we also had plans to bring in characters from divergent and the maze runner but unfortunately we never finished. anyway. long live the mega. it's still in a binder on my bedroom floor at home

8. have you ever received hate on a fic? yeah but not recently. my favorite was someone hate commenting on chapter eleven of a doctor who fic i posted on ff.net that i wrote when i was like 13-14. and when i called them out in the author's note of the next chapter, saying "if you don't like you don't have to read" they commented again and said something like "well obviously you don't know if you don't like it until you start reading, stupid" like yeah bro but. eleven chapters? if it took you that long to realize you didn't like it, that's sounds like a you problem

9. do you write smut? if so what kind? nope lol

10. have you ever had a fic stolen? not that i know of lol

11. have you ever had a fic translated? nope

12. have you ever co-written a fic before? not besides The Mega. but corey and i create (mostly cursed) AUs together which is close enough <3

13. what’s your all time favorite ship? i am morally obligated to answer outlaw queen for this. but currently matchablossom is occupying all my thoughts

14. what’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? oh there are so many atla fic ideas i have that i'm not sure i'll ever have time to flesh out and write. there's one i came up with based very loosely on the song snow by ricky montgomery that's sokka-centric but it's very complex and elaborate and i could definitely see it being upwards of 200k words and i just. don't have time for it which is very sad to me bc it would be so good if i did

15. what are your writing strengths? i'm so bad at questions like this. i don't know?? sometimes i write and i like everything about what i'm writing and sometimes i write and i hate it all. i guess dialogue ? sure

16. what are your writing weaknesses? action scenes. describing the physical details of the setting. sometimes (see: a lot of times) i write sentences so long and convoluted that they make sense to no one other than me.

17. what are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? gonna be honest i really haven't seen that much of this? like i think it's cool when it comes up bc i love other languages! but i also always worry i'm going to be mistranslating something whenever i do it skdhjgfd also if you're going to be doing a lot of it, i feel like you should probably include a translation somewhere so people know what's going on without having to like. switch back and forth between the fic and google translate or smth

18. what was the first fandom you wrote for? percy jackson

19. what’s your favorite fic you’ve written? it's probably gotta be this ultraviolet morning light (which is now on the second page of my fics what the heck???) tuvml is my baby and the longest fic i've finished to date and i still think about how rising sun verse zuko and sokka are doing quite often. i've also still got a couple half-finished fics for that universe and a longer sequel i'd love to publish someday but i've been. distracted by other fics

tagging (with no obligation): @that-was-anticlimactic @smilehoneyy @bisexuallsokka @beachytablecloth and anyone else who wants to!!

[itswildwinters]

Ask for writers

Thank you @theisolatedlily and @soldouthaz for tagging me, I really appreciate it! This lovely tag was created by @soldouthaz, which I think is brilliant to get to know other writers!! I love it, so thank you Sarah!

This is quite long, but I still hope it’s entertaining!

1. describe how you first started writing and when you first posted: I’ve always wanted to write. I know that I only began publishing this year (January 2020) but years back, I always would open up a blank document and just... write. Lack of confidence and language barriers (I wanted to write in English, but it isn’t my first language and I only became fluent three years ago) have made it so that I would never finish a story. I think we all had our wattpad moment but even on there I would never really publish because the platform just wasn’t right. But then I discovered ao3, where I’d read fics and also improve my English. Then I found out about fests, and I decided to participate in one last year (2019 BLFF) and my first fic then came out! 

And ever since, I’ve been able to write and finish what I start. It’s as if the lock that had been put to block my creativity had been destroyed; posting my first completed fic has acted as a turning point. I was extremely nervous when I first posted, still am, but now I have this need to write and I love sharing what I write and ever since I became a writer, my life’s been a lot better!

2. which of your characters do you typically resonate most closely with? do you base any characters off of yourself?: I switch between Louis’ POV, or Harry’s POV depending on the story; I tend to sprinkle a bit of myself in the characters I write, but then again they’re also completely different from me! I’ve never based a character completely on myself, which I find quite boring (haha); sometime unconsciously, I’d write a character based on someone I knew. I think some examples on how my characters can look a bit like me, is Hamlet in a sea of mist which has gotten his clear-headedness from me; or in my Murder Mystery fic, the way I describe Louis’ fear is heavily based on how I feel whenever I’m faced with something that makes me uncomfortable.

3. where do you often find inspiration?: art (paintings, music), books, quotes, poems and movies!

4. has quarantine helped or hindered your writing process?: having so much free time on my hands has definitely helped; I would seek refuge within my stories, to spice up quarantine!

5. do you listen to music/noise while you write or do you prefer silence? I love love love playing classical music (Chopin, Saint-Saens, Debussy, Yiruma, Einaudi, Faulkner, Schumann, Tchaikovsky, Mozart to name a few) while writing. I can’t write when it’s anything else. But I can also write when there’s nothing; hearing the rhythmic clicking sound of the keyboard as I press over its keys can be relaxing to me.

6. what is your biggest writing pet peeve in your writing or in general?: hm in my writing I guess I tend to write very long sentences, and also I still do grammar mistakes. I hope to work on those points. I also find the way I space my fics very annoying (which is why I’ve begun making outlines!).

7. describe your ideal writing setup: in a couch or a bed with several pillows piled up behind my back, classical music in my ears and a steaming cup of tea next to me.

8. favorite time of day to write?: I love writing when it’s very early, usually after I’ve woken up and freshened up. I don’t like writing when it’s too late because I’m not a night owl; rather an early bird. I especially love when I write and it’s still dark outside, then slowly dawn breaks in and the sky becomes tainted in warm hues of orange, yellow and sometimes even purple and pink.

9. favorite genre to write + one you’d like to try writing in the future?: I love writing fantasy, horror, suspense, action, thrillers. Especially angst and hurt/comfort, as well as slow burn. I’d like in the future to explore sci-fi and magical realism!

10. do you struggle with writer’s block? how do you typically overcome it? I haven’t suffered from writer block so far, which I’m glad!!

11. what is the easiest part of your writing process and the most difficult? writing is the easiest, but outlining (as in, coming up with plot ideas) is quite difficult for me. Also dialogues can be a bit of a problem to me.

12. how do you come up with original characters? (if applicable): I just make them up in my mind, and create them when they’re necessary to the story, giving them personality traits that will help the story develop.

13. what is your favorite and least favorite word? it’s hard to choose cause I have several but favourite: petrichor and least favourite: big

14. what is one thing about your writing that you’re really proud of and one thing you hope to continue working at?: I am proud of the way I describe, which allows me to really settle the story in its verse. I love describing, giving importance to the ordinary. Also feelings; I love describing them and exploring how I can translate them into words, so that the reader can feel them. But I have to work on my dialogues methinks.

15. what work of yours has your favorite ‘verse/world building? how did you come up with it?: those who from the Pit of Hell, roam to seek their prey on earth. I’ve always wanted to begin writing thrillers/Murder mystery fics and with that one I think I managed to? I had read an article on forensic medicine back in the 19th century and it sparked this fic’s plot!

16. what font and size do you write in? single spaced or double?: Arial, 11pt, single spaced

17. what is a typo(s) you find yourself making consistently?: I don’t know if this can be considered as a typo but I tend to repeat, within a paragraph, A LOT my character’s name instead of using pronouns. This is because I’m afraid of confusion when another character arrives in the scene.

18. (if applicable) do you separate fic writing from fandom?: I don’t know if I understood the question properly, but yes? When I use Louis or Harry in my fics, they’re completely different from real-Louis or real-Harry; they’re my characters, they only have the same names, but their personality reflects in nothing real-life Harry and Louis. 

I think to answer this better: I do separate fic writing from fandom, but I still think that fanfics are important to a fandom; I haven’t heard of a fandom without fanfics! Fanfics spice up fandoms, I reckon, they’re important to bring people together.

19. what emotion is your favorite to write? which is the most difficult?: Angst is my favourite thing to write, as well as fear. And I struggle with writing humour, I’m not a funny person to be honest

20. what is one thing you hope readers always take away from your works?: I always hope they like my writing and the plot, also the way I portray my characters. I want my readers to feel the writing, and the story in general. I just want my readers to truly enjoy what they read from me <3

21. what is the best and worst writing advice you’ve ever received?: I was told to always write very specifically and to fit my writing into a mould — don’t write ‘he’s’ but ‘he is’, or write shorter sentences, or stop describing so much. But in the end, there isn’t one way of writing — write the way you want.

22. which one of your works would you most want to see turned into a film/television show?: only one? ahhh this is hard! But I’d love to see those who from the Pit of Hell, roam to seek their prey on earth be turned into a movie. There are also a couple of wips that I could see on-screen but I’ll stick to that!

23. do you write scenes chronologically or out of order?: chronologically. Haven’t explored anachronies (analepsis/prolepsis) at all, but I might soon!

24. how do you handle criticism?: really well!! As long as they’re constructive and not mean, I love hearing what people think. Criticism is the best way for me, a person whose first person is not English, to improve!

25. what is the advice you would give to someone who is looking to start writing?: DO IT!! Honestly, don’t tell yourself, ‘I’m not good enough’. Just do it. Open a blank document and write your heart away, even if it’s not a story; just begin it. Explore your writing style, then maybe try to mould it into a plot. Writing is not limited to a certain category of people; it’s not just for those who can write. Writing is for everyone, and like most things, one must begin before improving (practice makes perfect!!) <3

26. what kind of feedback on your work always makes your day?: anything!!! Just the fact someone clicked on my story, read it, and took time to leave a comment — just that is enough to make my heart bursts with joy. I am so so grateful to every single person who’s ever read something from me.

27. which fic ‘verse of your own would you most like to exist in? which fic’s characters would you most like to befriend?: The verse I’m talking about is still a wip, but the siren/mermaid one that I’m currently building! I’d love to live in it.

28. what do you always enjoy getting asks about/wish people would ask about more?: Anything, really, my inbox is open to anyone and for everything! I love discussing books, movies and poetry as well as quotes, and maybe I wish people would come forth to ask me more about my fics or my wips, if they have any inquiries! Or I’d love to write drabbles! 

29. what has writing added to your life? how has it changed you?: It has made my life so, so much better. Writing has stitched up a gaping hole in my chest. It’s permitted me to improve in English, has made me more confident and has allowed my creativity to flow. I just... I love writing so much. It has also allowed me to meet some incredible people on tumblr, which I’m very grateful for!!

30. why do you write?: for many reasons; to spice up my life, to help me develop my creativity, and because I love it. I’ve always wanted to be a writer.

boost yourself + tags!

1a. share the last sentence you wrote:

The words echo around his head and collide with his temples like truncheon blows.

2a. describe the wip you’re most excited about:

I’m excited for all of them, but I’ll go with my third BLFF fic. It’s very angsty, post-war, ABO, exes to lovers. It tackles heavy topics, it’s such an emotional fic. I’m so so excited for her (she comes out in January).

3a. share the piece of dialogue from one of your works you’re most proud of: 

This is hard. But I’ll go with one from in a sea of mist cause the way Louis answers Harry... I love it:

“I feel like you want to kill me,” he pants out, using his right arm to hold himself up while his other hand comes up to rub at his burning cheek and nose, where Louis had hit him with the sole of his shoe.

“Before our date? No, never,” Louis blinks sweetly, chuckling and climbing up as Harry smiles to himself.

4a. share the best first and last lines from your work(s): I will do only those that are already published:

best first lines are from the hope that warbles in my fluttering breast: There, against the window, was stuck millions of snowflakes, their see-through quality no more as they huddled together, pushed against hard surfaces by the merciless wind. 

best last lines are from in a sea of mist: It takes a while for Harry to go to sleep, elation pumping through his veins so fast that the previous tiredness he felt has flown out of the window. But when he finally focuses on Louis’ heavened out breathing, and when he breathes in Louis’ natural perfume that always acts as an ambrosia over him, he manages to close his eyes, and for the first time in a while, he dreams of a future that’s devoid of any darkness.

5a. link the last fic you read: currently reading sweet like honey by @falsegoodnight and Spoonful of Sugar by @zanniscaramouche and they’re absolutely amazing!

6a. link the last work you published: in a sea of mist

7a. link to your ao3 (if applicable): tomlinvelvet

8a. someone that inspires you: Louis <3 his music and just his personality overall leaves so much scope for the imagination. There are also so many writers (both non-fanfic writers and fanfic writers) that inspire me daily.

9a. a comfort fic/work that you’ve been grateful for this year: even the best laid plans and just a flicker in the dark both by @falsegoodnight as well as eyes off you by @soldouthaz ... these fics are just so amazing, everything about them is top tier

10a. other writers that you’d like to tag! @falsegoodnight @scrunchyharry @hadestyles @mercurial-madhouse @youreyesonlarry @raspberryoatss @jacaranda-bloom @soldouthaz @behisoneandonly @vintageumbroshirt @so-why-let-your-voice-be-tamed @lougendarey @quelquesetoiles <3 no pressure ofc!

[dreamersleeps]

So, as someone whose father is very similar to Endeavor, I've never understood the notion that Horikoshi is trying to whitewash or excuse his abuse by giving him a character arc. Abusers are awful people, but it's not often that they're one-dimensional villains. Nobody ever talks about how confusing it is when your abuser wakes up and sees the damage they've caused, much less when they clumsily try to make ammends. It seems fans would rather it all be simple, when it's anything but in reality

/2 Are there ways it can be handled better? Of course. But a writer making an effort to explore the complexities of abuse through all its angels is far from abuse apology. It’s much more respectful (imo) to treat the situation like the confusing, complicated mess it is in reality, rather than reduce it to some simple cartoonishly evil bullshit that either limits the survivors of his abuse to being lifelong victims, or enables the continued abuse perpetuated by a former victim (i.e., Dabi)

Hello, I’d like to thank you for sharing your thoughts and opinions. I was actually surprised to open up Tumblr to see your messages in my inbox. I spent the past couple of days sitting on and thinking about it. I’m not sure if you were asking for my thoughts and opinions, but I’ve finally sat down and written my response. It’s late at night so I apologize if there are any statements below that are poorly worded or expressed. 

As you express, it’s a very complicated topic as a whole, because Endeavor, or Todoroki Enji is a complicated character. 

I can not and will not claim that I understand abuse like those who have experienced it. Additionally, It’s not in my place to tell people how to feel or think. However in response to what you shared, I will give some of my thoughts as a reader and fan of BNHA on the topics surrounding Endeavor. (Btw to the anon: some of what I have to say below will be my general opinions about the topic as a whole.)

When I try to write meta and other analysis pieces, I try my best to go back to the manga and base my analysis and arguments on the (official) translations instead of my opinions and thoughts from the beginning. I sometimes have to go back and re-read chapters to remind myself what is “canon” and then try to understand and express my interpretations on the matter. This is not to talk down on those who do not do this: this is just something I do for myself. I am most definitely influenced greatly by what others have to say but I also want to figure out my own interpretation of the story and characters.  

So, as someone whose father is very similar to Endeavor, I’ve never understood the notion that Horikoshi is trying to whitewash or excuse his abuse by giving him a character arc. 

I personally never really saw it as Horikoshi trying to excuse Endeavor’s abuse by giving him a character arc as well. As many others have stated, I don’t see it as a “redemption arc,” because it isn’t. 

I think that we all have to remember the diversity of the fans and readers of this and other fandoms. There are those who can personally relate to or understand what the Todoroki family has gone through, and others who are unable to. Those who are unable to fully understand certain experiences but can sympathize with the characters however even then, this lack of knowledge or exposure to the topic has led to people accidently expressing opinions that hurt or offended others. Additionally, based on what I’ve seen and read on Tumblr, there is quite a wide range of differing viewpoints from those those who can relate to the experiences of the Todoroki family.

Abusers are awful people, but it’s not often that they’re one-dimensional villains. Nobody ever talks about how confusing it is when your abuser wakes up and sees the damage they’ve caused, much less when they clumsily try to make amends. It seems fans would rather it all be simple, when it’s anything but in reality.

Abuse is complex. There is a very wide range of complicated feelings, emotions, thoughts and opinions that surround it. Everyone has a reason as to why they feel or think the way they do. Because we all have had different experiences and reactions to the events of our lives, we can not expect everyone to think similarly. 

Given that BNHA or shounen manga in general is catered towards a younger audience (compared to, lets say seinen manga) and Horikoshi is working with topics that are difficult to read or understand even for adults, I’d argue that part of the discourse may result from that. 

It seems like when we say that we like a certain character, people tend to automatically assume then that we approve of what they stand for and what they’ve done. I first watched the first two seasons of BNHA before I began reading it. I absolutely hated Endeavor in the beginning, however after I caught up in the manga and began to follow the chapter releases each week, ultimately the characters that really pulled me in to the story was Endeavor, Hawks, and Bakugou, arguably some of the most controversial characters of the series. 

Are there ways it could be handled better? Of course. But a writer making an effort to explore the complexities of abuse through all its angles is far from abuse apology. It’s much more respectful (imo) to treat the situation like the confusing, complicated mess it is in reality, rather than reduce it to some simple cartoonishly evil bullshit that either limits the survivors of his abuse to being lifelong victims, or enables the continued abuse perpetuated by a former victim (i.e Dabi) 

What truly drew me in was the complexities that came with their characters. I haven’t personally experienced abuse however I have lived through other experiences to recognize in my own understanding that life is both so negatively and positively complicated, confusing and messy. Some people want to see Endeavor fall, and others hope to see him actually change. These wishes are shaped by what we’ve seen or experienced throughout life. 

We like simple, clear cut, perhaps one dimensional characters because it’s easier to form an opinion about them. It seems like we struggle with characters like Endeavor and others because we are sometimes faced with the contradicting collision of our own thoughts, morals and beliefs with the actions and story of these characters. 

For some reason a lot of my analysis posts have revolved around Endeavor, Hawks, and Dabi and if anyone is interested, I personally believe that as much as we may love a character, whoever it may be, actions should and will be met with consequences. Tragedy does not excuse one’s actions. They may explain one’s actions but we are responsible for and should be held accountable for the consequences that result from it.  

If anyone was thinking it, this all does not mean that I think Horikoshi should be exempt from critique. And as you ask and answer, “Are there ways it could be handled better? Of course.” Additionally as I have written on the top of my blog, 

There will be posts found here that you may not agree with, however different perspectives are what keeps the meta conversation going. 

I think that many of us would prefer it if people would refrain from accusing, insulting or bullying Horikoshi and other fans because of their thoughts and opinions. Although it is understandable that it is difficult when we respond to the story and others emotionally, taking part in these types of activities is not the same as critiquing something. 

Boku no Hero Academia is still an ongoing manga. We get one chapter every one or two weeks at a time and so we only get little snippets of the full story. Based on new info and what we’ve read in past chapters, we make predictions, assumptions and have expectations about the future. However, I think that we all have to remember that the story of Enji, Rei, Touya, Fuyumi, Natsuo and Shouto is not complete yet. We are still in the midst of an unfolding narrative that Horikoshi is working closely with to present his readers. 

[shorkbrian]

ASKS

Hello again, asks are compiled under the cut. Please block the tag #shorkbrian answers a lot of asks# If you’d prefer not to see these types of posts from me. If I haven’t answered your ask, it’s because I’m saving it for a thirst, drabble, or fic.

I don’t ignore asks, but sometimes getting around to them overwhelms me lol. pls accept my apologies lol k here we go

I am very glad, I legit was so scared that it was too long and that it’d be disappointing bc the smut wasn’t super IN YOUR FACE yknow? But man am I glad to hear that.

I’m looking directly @ you

Someone noticed omg!!!  A lot of times I just put whatever song I played on repeat while writing that fit, but I have a *yandere* playlist that I listen to and it gets me going. Ty for noticing!!!

I’ve considered opening them permanently but I just... idek. I’d have to start deleting or ignoring the requests I don’t vibe with and Idk how to handle that lol. But thanks for the well wishes, hope your next few months treat you well friend!

Watermelon sugar why

Srsly you’re sweet but just wait until I start to really get going with all my nasty kinks okay, then you’ll be rethinking this strategy hunty lol!

I literally stalk @.vermiliren and @.kazooli and @.seita lol. Maybe when I get my blog more cleaned up, I’ll create a list of creators that I enjoy, along with fic recs. For now, here’s a link to my AO3 bookmarks which I read one like almost every single night bc I’m a horny gremlin.

I am the shark king. Sharks are my thing bro u don’t even know. I love them so much, they're dumb and big and beautiful and yeah I wish I was a mermaid who got to swim with them. Also I changed it bc I’m trying to make my blog more *professional* and all that so I can start being taken seriously askjakjdf

Compliments suck, if I'm being down and out honest. This does not bother me at all, I’m just unsure how to respond. I think I would prefer no comments, but I’m trying really really hard to just say “thank you!” and move on before I get uncomfortable. Having to fight with someone about how I perceive my self worth is exhausting, and especially so for the poor person that was just trying to say something nice and be nice to me. 

They do make me quite uncomfortable my dear lad/lassie/lasso. Say what you wish in the tags tho ! I don’t really reply to those, so there’s no pressure on me to have to say something back. I do however, see all the tags ppl use and some of them make me laugh so hard cause they’re so spot on, and it makes my day. like “Mark me down as scared AND horny” and “Bakugou better be able to bench 165 cause imma throw my fatass in his mf lap” and it kills me.

I SCEREAMED AKDHGSYDGASJSD this is the only format I'll be taking asks in now, no compliments just a yes/no answer to if my works help u cum god bless

you used the /gen!!!!! IDK what these are called but the /S and /gen and /J save my life!!!!

Frick you’ve figured me out, I do try to put like a nail-in-the-coffin sentence at the end. A lot of times it never works right, but I cannot for the life of my figure out how to end a single post ever. If anyone knows hmu pls ty

(Also ps I checked out ur blog cause yans are my jam and it is very much Not garbage!!)

That’s very kind of you, but pls don’t stay up past midnight it’s bad for ur Brian you’ll make bad decisions bro trust me all of my stuff is written after midnight

You will lafff..... but I will tell anyways..... I was prescribed a “life coach” after I got out of the hospital, which was really just a poorly disguised softcore “make sure u don’t yeet urself” type of thing. He had me write down things I liked about myself, and when I returned the sheet of paper still blank, he wrote stuff down for me. Like five sentences of “My hair and skin are unique and special” “I like animals and enjoy being kind to them” “I am worthy of respect” etc etc. and I had to look in a mirror twice a day and say those sentences to help “boost my self worth”. It sucked so bad dude, and I like got upset about it every time it came up, until finally my therapist was like “... this aint doin this sad bitch no good” and my parents got designated for yeet watch instead.

I know, logically, that (the majority of) people are not purposefully taking time out of their day to make me feel bad. They're trying to be encouraging and loving, and I appreciate it so much. But like... what do I say? If I say thanks, it’s almost like acknowledging what they're saying as true, and I can’t live with myself thinking I’m more than I am. I’m sorry you’ve had experiences that make compliments difficult for you also, I understand bro and I hope that your future holds healing and peace for you. 

Hopefully I won’t vent as much anymore lol, I’ll try to do that on my sideblog where I reblog really trigger-y memes akjdafhkjf. But thank you for your kind words bro, they’re appreciated and put in a nice lil jar.

Ah dw! This doesn’t sound like a jab. I think all of us r so sad n depressed and feel unworthy of love, so the fantasy of a Yan coming and forcing it on us and not leaving even when we lash out is just..... so attractive my heads gonna explode

me, thinking about kiri at any given moment like:

I have the next Hybrid! Kiri fic like lined up, but I’m so demotivated be I was SO CLOSE to finishing, and then wiped my computer like an IDITO

Waso, I’m taking horseback riding lessons bc my mom went:

and my grandpa told me that one of his horses was named Awaso and I immediately thot of u fun fact. But you’re so very kind, and I enjoy seeing you in my inbox. I’m never tired of u homie. You are loved and important, and it’s not an illusion. Even random strangers on the internet can feel soft towards you bro, and dats me, I’m the random stranger that likes u.

So I took Russian for a year, my dear friend, because I wanted to see if the language myth of “Russian is the hardest, Korean is the easiest” was true. I would say yes. So instead of like translating this and typing out a coherent response, I’ve resorted to google translate I’m so sorry but Виктор мог плюнуть мне в глаз, и я бы поблагодарил его. Also, the way Vitya is written in cryllic makes my heart swell it looks so cozy idek what I mean by that but it does? I treasure you man, hope to see you around in the new year and maybe??? we be good friends

Can any year be good when Kirishima Eijirou doesn’t exist?

cryface;;sad.jpg

I just imagine anyone who comes across my stuff, sitting at their computer shocked and slightly horrified, maybe turned on like

Daddy Aizawa makes me

Wait!! I have something to aid your troubles!!

ur welcome now u can be horny whenever you’d like 

pls every time we talk about Kirishima I have to act surprised like 

LISTEN BBYGORL I have had therapist Suga in the works since *checks notes* November. I am excited for it yeahhhhhh but sadly, I don’t think I will be continuing piano teacher Suga. The story is petered out in my mind, idk where it would go. Therapist sugarbird tho? We have some thots about this. Coming soon to theaters near you

[thatdamnokie]

Hi, I hope this doesn't come of as rude but I have found multiple Christian witch blogs, including yours and it interested me. But I was wondering how can one be a christian and a witch? Don't they inherently contradict themselves?

not as much as you might think.

i--and most likely the other blogs you mention--have written a lot about the relationship between “craft” (which i put in quotes because what it means to people varies from person to person) and christianity, from folk practices that were credited to god despite looking pretty similar to magic, to the church’s own history with subjects like demonology and the occult; not to mention translation studies, linguistics and historical context that might be overlooked by someone who’s not willing to go deeper with their research.

three posts that would be good to start with are here, here and here.

and for your first foray into this subject, i’m also going to direct you to this post right here. it’s a few years old at this point, but the reading recommendations are still solid.

plus--my practice is essentially prayer with props. i don’t work with lucifer or any other entities outside of the holy trinity (except i guess amelia and henry--snaps to @limunette for amelia and henry!--but while i love them dearly i’d hardly put them on the same level as, y’know, jesus). christ is my king, even if i’m shit at following the rules, ask too many questions and when someone tells me to not mess with something (like witchcraft!) my first instinct is to research and find out why.

i am, admittedly, a hot mess who read too many books and watched too many movies growing up and is mostly bored with reality 99% of the time as i have been since like 2002. this path found me during a point in my life where i was really, really struggling with my life outlook, my faith and where those things all connected. @unfashionablehousewife was there, i think, she knows.

the discovery of other christian witches, coupled with a bible study program i was doing and what we were going over in the class at the time (it was specifically the be transformed course taught by scope ministries, if anyone’s curious), it just--it all came together in a way that had to have been from something bigger than me. i’d never felt peace like that before.

when i’m in my circle, it’s just me and my god. it helps me feel closer to him, and to take faith in the power he’s blessed me with--even though i always close out with “above all, your will be done.” i’m a witch, after all, not a god.

... i don’t know if this answer was what you were wanting even slightly lmao. my inbox is always open for questions though! <3

[reminiscences]

another attempt at blogging

i started this tumblr a couple years ago at the same time kate did. i can’t remember why—i’m sure tumblr was in the news again for some reason. i guess it was before the great porn purge. i was talking about blogging again this week with my friend daniel, and i woke up this morning and he had sent me a blog he wrote on a new tumblr account early in the morning, so to continue my regression to the early 2010s, i too have rebooted tumblr, given it an era-appropriate name, and decided to give it another go.

the problem with having a newsletter is that i don’t think anyone wants to hear from me in their inbox daily, so i’ve become very precious about the things i write there. it feels like it has to really matter. i like blogs because they’re disposable and can be dumb and not your best writing. how many two-graf tumblr posts did i write in 2011 that were just thoughts i idly had during a statistics lecture? anyway, here’s the first blog, they won’t all be this long probably. 

When I think about eventually looking back at this year I think about what I want to remember from it. I will remember the first week of March. I’ll remember the last birthday party I attended in person at Branch Ofc, a perfectly serviceable Crown Heights bar that was very full of people. I’ll think about that night and how I showed up to the party with a Ziplock full of homemade salted chocolate chip cookies in my purse, how I shared them with a table where the birthday-haver and their friends sat. Breathing in the same air as the four dozen other people crammed into the bar. I can’t imagine it now. I like Branch Ofc because it is unpretentious without pretending to be a dive, unlike Sharlene’s, which tries too hard to mimic the aesthetic trappings of an authentic dive bar but is really just a normal Park Slope bar. Branch Ofc is just a bar where you can buy drinks, and it was an eight-minute walk from my old apartment. It used to be a bar with a photobooth and Big Buck Hunter but I think both of those are gone now. 

For a few days in March, it felt like people were preparing for a snow day. Everyone was slightly more on edge than giddy—but only slightly. “WFH but make it a coffeeshop” I saw on someone’s Instagram story, a selfie with four of their friends coworking somewhere in Bushwick, completely nullifying the point of a work-from-home edict. I ran into my friend Maddie at the renovated Key Food on Nostrand the next week. Maddie, her roommate and I were in the aisle with the Pop Tarts and the Oreos. “I feel like I should get those?” we asked each other, pointing at junk food. I wasn’t wearing a mask or gloves; nobody was. Some guy wearing a Cornell University Sigma Chi tshirt walked by us with the largest bag of dried beans I’ve ever seen in my life slung over his shoulder. That was a man who had never soaked dried beans in his life. I wonder if he ever ate the beans. We were a bunch of idiot 20-somethings blindly grabbing for cans of soup and Fritos for the end of the world. What were any of us doing there? Why was it imperative that day that I make and freeze a lasagna? Maddie’s roommate had fresh lasagna noodles from Eataly she wasn’t going to use before she left for her parents’ house, and she said I could have those. She brought them over for me and I idly wondered if you could get Coronavirus from someone else’s fresh pasta noodles or if the heat of the oven would kill the germs. I made my lasagna.

I’ll think about how March-to-May is just one long gray blurry streak in my head. I baked, I got into running, I said “running with a mask? No thank you, no more running for me,” I got a job, I felt bad about getting a job when everyone I knew in journalism was getting laid off. I did a lot of Zoom Zumba. At first I slept terribly, and then I started sleeping too much, and then I stopped sleeping again at some point during that stretch. There was a novelty to suddenly being inside all the time that made it feel like an excuse to get “really into martinis.” I got really into martinis. Then I stopped drinking for a couple months. Remember “Zoom happy hours”? 

The thing I use most as a means of setting apart different eras in my head is the music I used as a soundtrack at the time. I rang in the 2014 new year in my cute apartment on Westcott Street in Syracuse with my college boyfriend, drunk and blaring Cold Cave, before we walked down the street to Alto Cinco and got Mexican food and passed out. It was my senior year and I only had a few more months of living like this and I loved the small life I’d built for myself there. Of course, it couldn’t stay. When we broke up a year and a half later after he moved to New York, where I had been living for most of a year, I walked around the neighborhood near the Myrtle-Wyckoff stop, close to where we were living together, listening to Mitski’s 2014 album Bury Me At Makeout Creek. I sat in Maria Hernandez Park and watched a bunch of kids play Red Rover. I didn’t especially want to go home because I hadn’t taken an escape route into account when we broke up and somehow timed it out so that things ended after the first of the month, leaving me with three-and-a-half weeks of continuing to share an apartment with someone whose heart I had just broken. In retrospect it’s clear to me that I had just outgrown a relationship with someone five years older than me who hadn’t grown up at all, but I hear that Mitski album now and all I think about are the cold early April days of 2015 when no place and no person felt like home. There’s a line in First Love/Late Spring, by Mitski, where she sings “胸がはち切れそうで,” which translates to something like “My chest is about to burst (with grief).” My advice to recent college graduates moving to New York is to simply not do anything the way I did it. 

So when I think about 2020, I do not want to associate any music I previously had fond memories of with this year. This is unfortunate because every musician I like who produces sad music has nothing but time on their hands now and they’ve all come out with new songs and albums. My recently played selections on Spotify look like a cry for help: Phoebe Bridgers, Bright Eyes, even Tigers Jaw. 

On Saturday I couldn’t sleep in. I woke up at 5:30 and watched the sun appear through my bedroom windows. I kept rolling over, trying to sleep again, but it was futile. Eventually I got up and got dressed, and left my apartment on foot. The walk into lower Manhattan is a few miles from my new place in Fort Greene. I walked west on Fulton, and then down Flatbush. It would have saved me ten minutes to take the Manhattan Bridge, but I’ve always regarded it as the ugliest of the bridges to cross on foot or on bike—last fall, I would walk home from Ben’s apartment over the Manhattan Bridge, and it was just so grey. You get an okay view of Dumbo, I guess, on the walk east, but it isn’t much to look at. When I got back to the Brooklyn side on those walks, I’d get on the A at High Street and take it back to Nostrand instead of walking the last couple miles. 

So I chose the Brooklyn Bridge this time. It was as busy as you’d expect it to be in a non-pandemic event. Instagram boyfriends took pictures of their girlfriends, who took off their masks for a few seconds for the right shot. I saw a couple taking engagement pictures in front of the lower Manhattan skyline. It felt so normal, pedestrians and bicyclists squeezing past each other at the narrow points. 

I was listening to Saint Cloud, the Waxahatchee album that came out a few months ago, turning it over and over in my brain like a rock you pick up at the beach and end up carrying with you on a long walk. The album, outwardly, has this gauzy blue-sky Americana vibe but when you listen to the lyrics of some of the songs it feels like peeling back layers of skin until you hit a raw nerve ending. Every song feels like a eulogy for this year. “You might mourn all that you wasted/That’s just part of the haul,” Katie Crutchfield sings on Ruby Falls. I got to the title track, which closes out the album, as I ascended the bridge. When you get baaaack on the M train, watch the cityyyyyy mutaaaaaaate, she sings. I guess she’s singing about New York. Is there another M train somewhere? I don’t know. I’m going to think about this stupid year whenever I listen to this album, I thought.

I got off the bridge at City Hall, surveyed the ongoing occupation movement there and the literal dozens of cops that had seemingly been deployed to stand there and, at best, do nothing. I walked down Centre Street, eventually winding through the little park by Baxter Street where two adults were playing ping pong, which felt like a socially distanced sport, all things considered. I walked down all those side streets in Chinatown as the sun struggled to break through the oppressive clouds. I walked by Nom Wah, past the salon Polly taught me will give you a very good $12 blowout, past that annoying bar where the bartenders are dressed like scientists, past the place where Kate and I got our auras read on her birthday in January, and ended up at Deluxe Green Bo. I ordered my spicy wontons in peanut sauce and ate them right there, the hot plastic container burning my knees as I sat on the sidewalk. 

Afterwards I walked by all my favorite places—the skatepark under the bridge, Cervo’s, Beverly’s (RIP), Little Canal, Jajaja, the Hawa Smoothie near the East Broadway F. The skaters were hanging out in Dimes Square. Everything had changed but standing outside Kiki’s, it felt for a second like almost nothing had. It was almost a normal Saturday on Canal Street. The sky stayed electric blue until I got back to Brooklyn. 

[x0401x]

I haven't lost my point, you just keep dancing around it. Insulting my reading and math skills is an interesting way of saying "I have no proof that they did any of the things I said they did but I don't want to admit that" 😂 speaking of reading skills, I was actually saying that there's no way you would know that "multiple people" said they stole from you/are trying to usurp you/etc)...unless you were already talking to those anons abt it privately 🤔🤔🤔

You have. Looks like you forgot why you first messaged me, but you were trying to make me seem like a hypocrite when I said I was going to translate JR although someone else was already doing it, and then I explained to you what I had already said in a post that you apparently refused to read entirely: that I wasn’t going to translate the same volumes as the other translator. That’s it. You’d lost the point right there, from the very beginning.

No, you just don’t seem to have good comprehension, since you keep either twisting or ignoring the things I say. One example is that I never said anything about stealing or usurping. You’re the one who came up with that, right now. I said they tried to write me off by posting the same content as I did, which doesn’t necessarily mean they copy-pasted it from me, but that they took the content and re-did it in their own way.

There is a way, genius. Not all of them were on anon. I didn’t post the non-anon asks back then because I didn’t want to expose their URLs. There was a lot going on in my inbox back then that I didn’t make public, just so that it wouldn’t involve more people or add more fuel to the fire. Needless to say that they were also providing evidence to me. You talked about an “outsider’s perspective” before, and sure enough, that’s all you have. There’s no way you can know 100% of what happened back then.

but that's a little besides the point. point is, you keep saying they won't let it die, but you're the one who assumes any criticism you get is from them, bc there's no way anyone else could possibly be irritated by you, right? they haven't even been active in months. you keep saying you're amused by this, but you just sound paranoid (which, judging from the fact that you won't post my asks and ignore 70% of their content, is a pretty good guess) :x

That’s actually a new point that you enforced along the way. For some reason, your asks have turned into a fervorous defense argument for those clowns. I’m trying to figure out what you think you’re going to gain from it, because you’re literally doing me no damage whatsoever.

Again, reading skills. I never said anything about them not letting it die. I asked you to let it die and not try to bring it back. Whether or not you’re one of them doesn’t matter, it’s just that nothing good would come from reviving that incident. You simply happen to talk exactly like them and seem hellbent on proving that they didn’t do anything wrong when the whole fandom knows what went down, so I just wondered if you were part of the group. Since you’re cowardly hiding behind the anon wall, I can’t know and you can’t prove otherwise. That doesn’t mean I assume every hate message I get is from them, lmfao.

Their sideblog hasn’t been active, but each of them is active in their own personal blogs. Stop trying to play dumb, lol.

Now you just sound ridiculous. I literally said twice that I wasn’t going to publish your other two asks because you mentioned their URL. And what I didn’t reply to, if you could take notice, are all things that I have already explained but you conveniently pretended not to see. Go back and reread the previous answers until you stop bending my words and actually get them through your thick skull.

I forgot to mention, though, that the JR OP wasn’t mad at me for personal or ship reasons like the bow bastards. She was mad because I was going to start translating the novel from its second part, which is nothing serious at all. Plus, I’ve already taken back that decision, so the problem is already solved.