#not an issue. i just wanted to see more stuff without design involvement.

[squuote]

i need to draw my narrator design like a lot. i need to draw him to death or until i truly get sick of this guy. proper narrator burnout

[showtoonzfan]

So I wanted to avoid talking about the Alastor Voodoo discourse, (I kinda already did on twitter) but after seeing this thread I couldn’t help but want to give my two cents on it. Putting aside the fact that Rae is a problematic bootlicker regarding Viv and was someone who took part in dismissing her victims/transphobia, I wanted to say that their idea of Alastor being white passing when he was alive COULD work. I spoke with someone who is more educated on this subject than I am, and it actually could be good representation and educate people on the challenges POC had to face due to their history of being slaves and segregated. I actually wouldn’t mind the idea that he came off as more white passing, had to force himself to speak in a different accent for the show business, and that’s the reason he was able to get a job as a radio host in the first place, since he’s mixed.

HOWEVER, it’s upsetting that this thread was created just to excuse and defend Viv’s shitty character designing and silence people who have an issue with it, especially people of color themselves. I’m mixed race as well so it’s ridiculous that Al looks the way he does for a black man, there is no reason for his demon design to not have his ethnic features, it’s as simple as that, stop telling people they shouldn’t be upset about it, the time period has nothing to do with him looking white.

Rae also seems to have a similar issue with the fanbase where they’re inserting her personal headcanons/interpretation of Alastor into the canon show. I have NO idea what they’re going on about in the second tweet because all we know about Alastor is that he has a “moral code” and possibly only goes after bad people, but we don’t know the in depth details yet or anything on how he was murdering while being a radio host, Rae’s just adding stuff that isn’t there to fit their headcanon/idea. They need to realize they’re not a writer of the show, Viv is and we haven’t seen her ideas for Alastor yet, so using a fan theory/interpretation of what you THINK he could be like just to dismiss people’s issues with him is ridiculous. This goes for the entire fanbase as well.

I don’t know why everyone is trying to excuse the fact that he doesn’t look black and defend his voodoo practices. It has nothing to do with the character, it’s the creator that’s the issue. She was the one who decided to make him mix creole, she’s the one who decided to make him practice voodoo and yet she refuses to commit to her decisions, refusing to educate herself on how to fucking draw black people and listen to POC voices on how bad using REAL voodoo symbols are. Now that I think about it, why does Alastor need to be involved in Voodoo at all. Why couldn’t he just be a serial killer radio host. Him practicing voodoo doesn’t add anything to his character, at least yet. With Dr. Facilier it kinda made sense because his voodoo is what turned Naveen into a frog, he made deals with demons to give him these powers and that’s exactly what got him killed in the end. Alastor meanwhile is a deal maker and I guess that’s what made him powerful??? It’s kinda hard to say with Viv’s shitty vague world building, but you could have easily made him a powerful overlord without that.

The point is, these issues with Alastor are on HER, not on the people complaining about it and if these people were fucking normal regarding criticism and feedback, we wouldn’t be in this mess.

[level2janitor]

how to run an OSR game

a while back i made this post to help people who were interested in OSR games but didn't know where to start, explaining the general design philosophy and going over a bunch of different OSR rulesets you can run a game with. so this is a follow-up post about how to actually run these (especially bc not all of them have much actual GM guidance)

note this is a highly opinionated post and some people from the more meatgrinder-y end of the OSR might take issue with this. but this is advice that works extremely well for my games.

how to prep situations and not plots

this is good advice for most games but OSR especially because OSR gameplay is so driven by player scheming: don't ever include "and then the players will..." in your prep, because you do not know what the players will do.

if your prepped scenario hinges on the players taking a specific action or the whole thing falls apart, you're digging your own grave as the GM. trying to account for every action the players can take is a trap, because players are creative and clever and their options are only limited by their ideas. that's the game.

so "prep situations, not plots" has become popular advice in TTRPG communities, especially OSR circles. but how do you actually do that

the most important elements of prep you want to figure out are:

what do all the NPCs involved in this scenario want? what social levers (wants, fears, habits, allegiances, guilty pleasures, relationships) do they have that the players can pull?

what will happen if the PCs never interfere? what conflicts and schemes are brewing in the background?

what locations are there to explore? who and what is inside them, what dangers and treasures are inside?

the best prep is stuff you can't improvise, or stuff that's unsatisfying when improvised. you should probably know monster stats ahead of time, know the layout of dungeons, that sort of thing. elements relevant to challenging the players are important to prep.

stop rolling for everything

coming from nearly any other TTRPG to an OSR game, your instinct when a player says "i want to do X" is "okay, make an X roll" through a skill system or a pbta move or something.

if you do this in an OSR game, you run into problems.

player characters aren't very strong. they have single-digit hit points, few if any class abilities, and whether they're carrying a crowbar, a grappling hook, a lantern, etc. is as impactful as their choice of class.

this is because the game is about using your head more than using your character sheet - the sheet just lists tools to apply your creative thinking to. scheming and managing your resources is the game.

and this means if a player has a clever idea, you should almost never reward them with a die roll to see if they succeed. a skill check is just a random chance of failure. instead most actions should succeed or fail automatically.

here's a good checklist to determine whether something succeeds:

is it something a normal, untrained person could do? if yes, you succeed.

could a normal person do it with the right tools, training and/or time to work? if yes, you succeed if you have any of those things.

if you don't have any of those, you can't. find another approach or get ahold of those conditions for success.

die rolls are for resolving uncertainty and risk. picture a version of 5e where there are no ability checks, only saving throws - dice you roll when something's gone wrong and you're in danger.

which leads into the next point...

communicating information

one of the worst sins of roll-based task resolution is when it's used to determine perception. players making informed decisions is the heart of the game, and they can't do that without information.

give information freely. if your character could know it, they probably do. try to do this too much. never gate information behind a die roll, especially the PC's surroundings.

part of this is always informing the player what is at stake. if a player's in a dangerous enough situation that success comes down to a die roll, you must let them know that before they opt into making that roll, and what the consequences for failure are.

OSR games are about risk management, so tell your players what is at risk when they make those decisions.

entering combat

combat is one of the most dangerous things in an OSR game - it's unpredictable, lethal, and entering it is always a big decision.

if you're coming from a game like 5e, often your first instinct when an encounter occurs is, "roll initiative!" but this is a mistake. you always, even when combat is about to start, ask players for their approach. do they fight? flee? negotiate? surrender?

because combat is so risky, forcing players into it unprompted fundamentally changes the dynamic of your campaign. keep in mind, once combat starts, you don't get any input between rolling initiative and taking your turn. your fate is up to the dice - your tactics matter, sure, but they can't save you from losing initiative, being crit, and dying from bad luck.

if players willingly choose combat as their approach, they should know the risks and what they're getting into. sometimes combat is the best way to achieve your goals, so it'll still happen.

[cheesus-doodles]

So if it was Mikey that was getting married would the wedding be a lot smoother or is izana crashing the wedding too?

Link to relevant Wedding Ask 1 ; Ask 2

Masterlist

‎

Been a while since I answer a ask and since this came in ;-; im sorry its been almost two years...

No doubt that anything related to Mikey would be absolute chaos, and doubly so if Izana is involved.

Considering just Mikey to begin with, the rest of the Toman founders already aren't very happy - not because you picked Mikey over them or anything of the such (with the exception of Kazutora of course, this baby boy is seething with envy). Okay maybe all of them are a bit jealous over the whole situation, seeing that the blond-haired airhead who was probably the least capable of caring for another person being the one you chose. But still, putting aside their jealousy, the other five just know that it'll be a huge, huge uphill struggle its going to be having to wrangle him into behaving himself so that you would have the time of your life that you deserved.

Getting Mikey to propose to you to start is a fight in itself, because this baby boy doesn't want to bother with anything, not even proposing, lest of all a full wedding - after all, why care when you were already as good as his? Just wants to move in immediately and start gate-keeping cuddles, forehead kisses and head pats. So right from the beginning, it is the other five Toman founders pulling the strings; okay maybe four, because Kazutora would stubbornly refuse to do anything but cling to you and cry for attention. He does not support this wedding one bit and will not hesitate to make it known (even tried asking you to marry him with an onion ring that he was in the midst of eating), though all he gets in return was reassuring pats and extra love.

Baji and Draken pull their weight for the proposal - the First Division Captain would secretly take your ring size while playing a game of chopsticks (don't ask how, he's an expert), while Draken and the brothel girls would pick out a ring. Your wedding dress has 100% been sorted out many years ago by Mitsuya, delicately designed and impeccably crafted to your exact taste and dimensions, and Mikey is getting side-eyed and threatened into being measured for a custom suit if it was the last thing the Second Division captain does. Pah bless his father's real estate company connections has a venue down pat, and Kazutora is brow-beaten in helping with the decorations on the threat of sending you off on a honeymoon with Mikey and without him.

Everyone and anyone would be threatened to tiptoe the line - your wedding will be nothing but perfection, and you would repay their efforts will lots of attention and affection of course.

The guest list is short and vetted over and over again. Immediate family only, no strangers, and absolutely no other men (absolutely not, especially if it wasn't someone the Toman founders knew). You having guests at your wedding was already something they compromised on because they knew you had several people you desperately wanted to invite.

Having to drag Mikey to the actual wedding is an entire issue altogether, and it required all four of them to stuff the stubborn and whiny boy into his suit and whisk his ass off to the wedding venue. Seeing how excited you were for your big day only made the other founders more determined to make sure it goes off without a hitch. The Toman President is tied to a chair and Draken even seats on him so that he doesn't go running off to find you and ruin the surprise of what your wedding dress looked like. Not like Mikey cared, no. He just couldn't wait for cuddles and those handmade taiyakis that his friends told them you had on hand (it was a lie).

But then, for some reason unknown to even god himself, if you somehow caught not only Mikey's but Izana's attention. Oh boy.

Izana is bound to overhear about all the preparations for a wedding and quickly puts together that you, the Tenjiku princess (not Toman's, definitely not, not in a hundred years), were getting ready to marry Mikey, and throws an absolute fit. Unacceptable, outrageous, and downright heresy. Would attempt to storm over to your place and demand an answer, had to be held back from doing so by the combined force of Kakucho, Rindo, Ran and Mochi, who rather not their president start a gang war this very moment.

But this tanned boy was not going to let this slide so easily, no way in hell - he knew what those Toman bastards were planning, and he wasn't going to let them get away with keeping you all to themselves, not when you're probably just going along with it so that you don't make your so-called friends feel bad. So of course Tenjiku starts devising their own plan. Kakucho outright kidnaps you from your school to go ring shopping, biting his tongue and lying that it was a friendship ring (Ran had to be stopped from bursting out laughing). Izana got huffy getting fitted for a suit, and Rindo awkwardly shuffling by the side didn't help much either.

At last when your wedding day rolled around, everything was ready.

And as you started walking down the aisle, Mikey waiting at the end, Tenjiku springs their plan into action. They gate crash your wedding right through the front door, Kakucho, Ran, Rindo and the other executives immediately jumping on the Toman founders while Izana rushes straight through. The white-haired boy barely even having to stop as he sweeps you up into his arms, makes a split turn, and then proceeds to rush back out with just an eep from you, with a mind to get you to his arranged priest/official and making you sign his own document of marriage. Mikey letting out an outraged shout as he gave chase, Mitsuya is shouting, cursing and telling Mikey to be careful with his suit and don't dirty or tear your white dress.

Ends up starting a gang war anyway at your wedding, with Izana expertly turning to intercept a flying kick from Mikey just in time while balancing you in his arms, while the audience (however limited, no one else is allowed to look at you after all, the Toman founders would never allow it) are left looking on in utter disbelief at the fight breaking out in front of their eyes. You probably having to end up calling off your wedding more bemusedly than not when the whole thing devolved into a screaming match with both Izana and Mikey pinching and pushing at each other while insisting you pick one of them right this instance.

Honestly, you thought that getting married to one of them would settle all of them down, since you would be "safe" and they would be able to continue to "protect" you. You didn't think that gang lines would still be drawn, but obviously you were mistaken. Definitely have thought about just picking a third neutral party to marry, but knowing your very fussy, very overprotective baby boys, that would just drag more people into the fight.

[starlightseraph]

final (long) thoughts about the rpf debacle, as i’ve finally blocked all the major accounts involved

regarding david and michael: they seem like two great guys with great chemistry, and they appear to really care for each other. the nature of their connection, their happiness in their relationships, the details of their personal lives, etc are not for any of us to say. we certainly don't need to analyse every thing they do and every flick of their eyes or use 20 year old tabloid bits to create a story about them being trapped and potentially abused and "clearly" wanting to leave their partners so they can fuck. no one dislikes the theorising because it's m/m, anyone who does has issues to work through. 99% of us dislike it because it's invasive, done without any knowledge of the boundaries or comfort of the people it's about.

regarding georgia: idc what other people say, i think she can actually act. i think it's unlikely that my opinion is biased, given that i actually became aware of her before i even knew who david was (merlin, i was 11). do i think she's the greatest actress who's ever lived? no. do i want to fall at her feet to praise every word she types on her ig? no. to me, her public personality is pretty cool and likeable, and she certainly uses her platform for good things. i don't see evidence that david has an issue with the social media stuff that georgia does, maybe a bit of playful annoyance, but nothing too serious. she does actually say good things about him, quite often. when she says things that could be deemed insulting, it’s nothing unique to david, she does that with practically everyone she posts about. i see absolutely no reason to believe that she's abusive, a baby trapper, that her children dislike her, or that david is miserable with her. i genuinely feel that her "stalker" comments were jokes. based on what she and david have said, it sounds like she was acting like anyone with a crush would, texting the object of her affections and wanting to hang out. in my community, completely normal behaviour is called stalkery, just to poke fun at someone for having a crush, sometimes done in a self-deprecating way. as for the peter davison story and its inconsistencies, idk what to make of that. the claims that she got her "david" tattoo right after they met and that she changed ty's name without input from david are completely unfounded. I've seen no evidence for the name bit, and i've actually found evidence against the tattoo story. i'm not proud of it, but i did go digging through paparazzi photos, and she doesn't actually have the tattoo until later. no one, not even the tabloids, seems to have anything about an open relationship or them not going steady before getting married. the first actual records of those rumours is in the blogs that say the rumours have been around for nearly 20 years. all the "evidence" for these last few things that i've seen cited (or even very boldly linked) is from the trashiest of trashy blog sites with 2004-level web design. i take them with a grain of salt, given that not even the daily mail repeats their stories.

regarding anna: i'm ambivalent towards her. i don't see any obvious talent as an actress or model, but she also hasn't really done anything that has the opportunity to showcase ability in those fields. i also don’t see much chemistry with the others, but, again, we’ve hardly seen anything. the claims that she got pregnant through a one night stand seem more widely acknowledged, so maybe that was the case. if that is what happened, i have a few things to say. firstly, did neither of these grown adults have birth control? the baby trapping claims imply that she deliberately sabotaged it, which is an incredibly serious claim that we are in no position to make. within this story, michael apparently met her at an acting school graduation and they hooked up. she would've been in her early-mid 20s and he would have been almost 50… the rpf blogs say that they have no personal bias against georgia and anna, and that they're perfectly willing to call david and michael out on their bullshit, yet (to my knowledge) they haven't said anything about this. if they're really so concerned with the truth, and they believe the graduation hookup story, why not call michael out for it?? they were both adults and while i do believe that healthy relationships with a large age gap are possible, it’s still a bit weird given how they would’ve met. also, there are have been lots of (unconfirmed) allegations that michael is a serial cheater, so what makes these blogs think that he wouldn't also cheat on david in this fantasy world view of theirs? i believe that people can be bettered no matter what they've done and that they should get chances, but assuming that he wouldn't cheat in this singular situation seems pretty biased to me.

bottom line, we don't know! this is exactly what i’ve said since the beginning, that we have absolutely no place in these people's lives outside of admiring their accomplishments and supporting their work. please, everyone, chill. by all means, write fun stories on ao3 using the likenesses of david and georgia and michael and anna! i find it uncomfortable, but i don't have real moral objections to fiction that is only intended as fiction. i’ve previously said that we don't have a problem with the georgia/anna shipping jokes because they're jokes, and one of the pf blogs said that it was serious because of an ao3 slash fanfic and that we were only fine with it because it was f/f. correction, we were fine with that because it was purely and entirely fictional. not being presented was an investigation into real life.

i've seen lots of these blogs saying that a video of david and michael having sex could be released and the we'd find a way to brush it off or discount it. flipping this and applying it back, i think that david and michael could hold a press conference declaring that they're not in a relationship, and the blogs would work around it, claiming beards and façades.

quick warning to everyone, digital footprint exists. one blog in particular very casually displays her identity, and someone could easily send her graphic sex stories and claims of abuse about real strangers to potential employers or event hosts. this isn't a threat, i really can't be arsed, but it's something to be aware of, that these things can have real life repercussions.

i want to make it very clear that i would have absolutely no problem if all the theories actually turned out to be true. it’s the extreme parasocial obsession and complete lack of any boundaries that i object to.

the conspiracy story had been told many times, every single group of devotees to a public figure or piece of media weaves and incredible web of false evidence and imagined narratives. maybe you think that you're actually right this time, that you've become privy to a truth. maybe you are right. but to believe undeterred that this time it’s different and your theories are true is just wishful thinking. if everything is true, great. but, until they confirm or deny, you don't get to tell their story for them.

[see-arcane]

Happy Friday the 13th!

Time for some updates.

Plushies

I promise I have not forgotten the little guys-in-potentia. I’ve just been going through many circles of Hell trying to find a decent manufacturer that isn’t operating on some secret ‘Sorry, We Only Work with Brands ™ and Influencers ©, Enjoy Sending Half a Dozen Queries to Our Inbox-Void, You Little Nobody~ <3’ rule. So that was fun. But, finally, I think I’ve found a prospective maker. The issue?

The smallest bulk order is a 50-count. $30 each, roughly. Just for one. 30 x 50 = at least $1,500. If I try to do Mina and Jonathan (DO NOT SEPARATE), that’s 100 plushies. $3,000.

And that’s without dealing with the logistics of storing all the dang things, figuring out shipping costs depending on where I’d be mailing them (not including the packaging), and figuring out how to fairly price them without also gutting everyone’s wallets while we’re all broke.

Fundraising options like Kickstarter, Indiegogo, and Backerkit all look like the only solid way to go here, but they come with their own caveats.

I need some kind of prototype to have on display, not just the concept. The manufacturer I have in mind does provide a physical prototype prior to going to work on bulk orders, but I’d need to talk with them about the what-ifs involved if a fundraiser fails to drop enough cash to afford the full order.

I still need to figure out what a fair funding target would be that would cover cost of manufacturing/shipping/etc and I do not know that magic number.

Tiers? Do I do tiers with this? If so, how do I portion those out dollar-wise? What goodies can I throw in that would sweeten the deal? At the moment all I have is my writing.

Argh.

Really, 4) kind of sums up the whole thing at the moment. I really, really want to make all my assorted little guys come to cuddly life, but the numbers involved are looking more complicated than pi, especially when I—(frankly, all of us)—have Zero Money to gamble away. If I’m off by one (1) digit that means the difference between ‘Yes, I can pay for manufacturing and shipping and et ceteras no problem!’ and ‘WHOOPS SURPRISE YOU’RE PAYING AN EXTRA FEE OUT OF POCKET NOW BECAUSE YOU DID NUMBER WRONG, HA HA.’ Add that to the fact that I really don’t have anything tangible to pin to hypothetical tiers just now?

I’m afraid the plush Harkers (along with Quinn Morse and his new accessory) have to go on a back shelf for the time being.

But, for a more positive note…

October Scares and Scribbles

I plan to have a Substack in place sometime within October. It will include not just Harker’s current helping of chapters, but…

A new Harker teaser

Backups of some older stuff

[REDACTED] as a little Halloween treat

A generally tidier domain to keep my scattered scrawling in order

As it stands, I don’t feel comfortable turning it into a paid subscription Substack. I won’t be doing clockwork updates and what I will have up won’t be worth a routine fee. I’ll likely have a Ko-Fi link up as a sort of tip jar, but that’ll be that.

Speaking of money…

Maybe Making Merch?

Turns out the options for making less complicated bric-a-brac than stuffed animals are…less complicated. Imagine that. I’ve also been poking around looking at possibilities for stationery, bookmarks, cups, assorted bits and bobs. You know the Dracula Cast(ula) was made for journals and coffee mugs. However, I need to know what kind of designs folks would want to see. So:

The prospects here are much less stressful as far as puzzling out details goes, so I feel a little better about chewing on this. Still need to settle on Official Designs, but I’d wave those around for folks to see first.

All that said?

Argh

Because it bears repeating.

You’ll notice I haven’t laid out exact dates or timeframes for any of this stuff. That’s because I’m still neck-deep in the job hunt, along with grappling with the possibility of having to burn more money on new courses to enter a field I hate, but looks to be one of few career paths that will actually pay me more than pocket change. Said positions not even being guaranteed to still be in the same shape once I’m out of class. Same as my last job.

In four months, I’ll have been applying for a solid year. Every day. All to positions that either send copy-paste rejections, ghost outright, turn out to be thin veils for scams, or, most fun prospect, aren’t even real, because companies keep putting up false job openings to look like they’re expanding. My time has alternated between this and writing and trying not to look at my bank account. Between that and anxiety bordering on nausea concerning the upcoming election, my Halloween vibes are pretty bruised too.

It has. Not been the best time.

But the best part of it is still going on. Because that part is you guys. The people who’ve enjoyed my nonsense. The people who’ve actually dropped some bucks my way on Ko-Fi or bought my book! The people who’ve encouraged me for ages and have turned out to be some of the coolest folks a fellow bookworm could hope for. Thank you.

I hope you’ll cross your fingers for me going forward.

Postscript

I’m also working on the rough draft for this thing. Whether I can get it up on the platform I’d like or not, it will see daylight even if I have to drag it outside myself.

Living’s not cheap, but complaining is free. >:}

[walnutofthedead]

Can you do Yandere Mikoto x Gn! Reader headcanons?

Hahaha hah djbdhddhhdhd

The ask I’ve been waiting for frfr….

I’m so normal about yanderes (they’re fun to write leave me alone)

So uhm I MAY go a wee bit overboard here??? And May or may not have ended up doing the yan alphabet?? This is for Mikoto and not his alter, if you want an orekoto one just lmk <3

Prob will do a shortfic later

Yandere shit under the cut

Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

I see Mikoto as a physical affection type of guy tbh- Like, he’s still really sweet! Always nice with his words, but he’ll like randomly hug you from behind, hold your hand, a lot of things that most regular couples do. 

Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?

Well… in terms of like, actual messes, he tries to be clean! Mikoto doesn’t particularly even want to hurt anybody. He’s not ALL bad…

With that said, sometimes, he has to. If someone is trying to steal you away and doesn’t heed his warnings, or if they hurt you, he has no choice but to put an end to that! 

If someone hurts you, he’ll be more brutal.. not above torturing them if they’ve gone that far. 

If it’s because he’s jealous, he’s a bit more nice. He doesn’t make it too painful. Maybe a blow to the head, a fast-acting poison… 

After all, he can’t blame them for falling for you just like he did! It’s impossible not to~

They just don’t get to take you away from him. Never. 

Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

Nono! He’s a sweetie:c Mikoto honestly would just treat you with genuine respect and love,, be like, he loves you! He knows he’s already done something awful by abducting you and is sympathetic. Prob tries to make it as comfortable as possible. 

Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

Well… he’s definitely do a lot of hugging and stuff like that… but the furthest he’d go without (implied or direct) consent is just a peck on the lips<3

Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

So here’s the thing- he’s delusional as fuck. He’ll just treat your relationship like he’d treat any regular one. He’s never invulnerable around you, but there’s definitely times he’s more vulnerable. Don’t hurt him please the silly:(

Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?

So confused and betrayed. You love him, so why are you fighting him? He only wants what’s best for you! 

Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?

He takes this shit so seriously- istfg bro hates it when you try and escape :((( kind of a pushover tbh- like he’ll probably just try and make it even more comfortable for you whenever you try to leave. 

Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

Being abducted is the worst it’ll get. Even while captive, he treats you with such care it’s baffling- he loves you!!!! Cmon pooks love him back ong

Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

I feel like he daydreams about marrying them… like he has it all planned to a T. Probably already designed an outfit for s/o to wear at their wedding. We love a ✨ prepared ✨ mans 

Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?

He gets jealous and inhales lethal amounts of Copium. The poor silly

Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling?

Nah bro just acts like his normal self but like,, slightly more happy???   

Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

Just approaching regularly, he has no issue going up and talking to them! When confessions are involved though, he has a much harder time… probably would opt for a love letter. A long, well-written one with little doodles on it !!

Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

Lmao nope

Naughty: How would they punish their darling?

He kinda just.. wouldn’t..? If he got really pissed somehow, he might like, lock them in their room or something… but he avoids using violence when possible. 

Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?

Not many! When he abducts them, he’s strict at first, but eventually even lets them go out so long as he’s there with them. 

Patience: How patient are they with their darling?

He’s incredibly patient. He doesn’t get angry very easily, and when he does, he calms down fairly quick. This is assuming he doesn’t switch to Orekoto, of course…

Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

Haha no

Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?

Oh, absolutely. He’d feel like actual shit about it. Even with all the gaslighting himself to try and justify it, he knows taking someone captive like this is awful. And especially for such selfish reasons… that’s why he tries making it up to them by spoiling them! 

He won’t let them go though. There’s no going back once you kidnap someone. 

Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?

Hm……. I’d say probably just emotional dependency and bad attachment issues. He just happened to get a bit too attached to s/o. 

-bonus hc: he gives his friends nicknames to make it feel like they have a deeper friendship than they do so they don’t drift away from him ! 

Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?

Oh, he hates it- just seeing them sad or afraid breaks his heart. He doesn’t know what to do, so he just tries his best to comfort them with words. 

Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?

Give his darling some MOTHERFUCKING FREEDOM-

Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?

His willingness to trust. As I mentioned earlier, he gives a lot of freedom, and that only increases as his trust in them builds. Once he’s convinced they do, in fact, love him, and won’t try and leave, he’ll begin letting them go out alone for short periods of time so long as they let him track their location. You can already see how that could turn out in an unsatisfactory way for him…

Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?

Nope. Or at least, it would take a lot for him to lash out and do so. And even then, it wouldn’t be that bad. 

Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?

He doesn’t really worship them per se… but he will totally go to extreme lengths to win them over. No amount of time or money or effort is too much if it means a chance at winning his darling over <3

Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?

Depending on outside factors like other people pursuing them, it could be anywhere between a few months and a couple years. 

Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?

Haha no. 

[eschergirls]

Hi everybody!  

It's a new month, so it's time to celebrate how awesome squirrels are and also to do a site update and to thank our wonderful Patreon subscribers (and adjacent squirrels)!

For a site update, the big news is me and our website designer (Socketwench) are going to revamp the main website (eschergirls.com) and change the overall look, probably so the web version has a grid of post previews rather than just listing the posts in a row because the current setup leaves a lot of empty space since it only previews one line of text.  Mobile users shouldn't see much change except we'll be removing or changing the scrolling menu bar so it doesn't block most of the post on small screens.  We'll also be adding a popular tag cloud so people can more easily browse the blog if they want to casually.

If anybody has any other suggestions to improve the main site's usability and readability, please let me know!!!  I'm very interested in feedback.  I'm also working on the glossary and index, so people should be able to search the tags by category of character, series, genre, etc... and the glossary should explain what some of the terms like "boobsocks" (clothing that encases each breast separately like socks), "boob flounder" (both breasts on one side of the body), etc... mean.

Also, as usual, I've been working through the archives and fixing up all the old posts to match the current way I'm formatting my posts and to fix posts that were broken during the Tumblr export.  I also add alt-text to every post I restore so people who use screenreaders can access them.  This month, I fixed this post involving Marvel's Magik on an old trading card, the two posts with Boundless Comics' Ember (1, 2), and these old PLAY Magazine "Girls of Gaming" pages (1, 2, 3). I also fixed up this submission about how video game magazines used to advertise contests where you could go on a date with Lara Croft and stuff, and I edited the post to include an update with a link to an interview with one of the models who portrayed Lara for those ads, for those interested! 

I'm still working my way through the Tumblr inbox backlog, so if you submitted a post a long time ago, you might see it pop up soon.  Unfortunately, the way Tumblr does its inbox means the older it is the longer it'll take me to reach it. :\  I apologize sincerely for how long it takes me to get through the inbox sometimes.

I'm also still appealing the many incorrectly flagged posts on Tumblr, and the arbitrary algorithmic flagging, sudden rule changes, and other issues, are why I'm trying to fix up the main site to try to get it as usable for everybody as possible so Tumblr isn't the only way to view the blog, or the only place where it's archived.

I know it's repetitive, but it's also why I really appreciate everybody who supports us on Patreon and Ko-Fi.  It gives me much needed help to pay for server costs, upgrades, domain hosting, and just keep the site going in general. :)  I really appreciate that people think what we do is worth supporting <3

So I want to thank everybody who supported Escher Girls on Patreon in March!

Thank you so so much to:

Anne Adler Cat Mara CheerfulOptimistic  Chris McKenzie Em Bardon First Time Trek Greg Sepelak Ian Cameron Ken Trosaurus Kevin Carson Kim Wincen Kristoffer Illern  Holmén Leak  Manuel Dalton Mary Kuhner Max Schwarz Michael Mazur Miriam Pody Morgan McEvoy randomisedmongoose Rebecca Breu Ringoko  Ryan Gerber Sam Mikes Sean Sea SpecialRandomCast  Thomas 

And a special thanks again to PJ Evans for donating on Ko-Fi last month! :)

Also a huge thank you to everybody for reading, submitting, and generally commenting and engaging with Escher Girls!  It makes running the site so worth it. :)

For those who want to follow us without using Tumblr, we have an RSS feed. (For newbies, RSS stands for Really Simple Syndication and is basically a feed you can read using an RSS reader. Simply copy and paste https://eschergirls.com/rss.xml into an RSS reader and it will keep you up to date on Escher Girls!)

Thanks so much to everybody, and see you next month!

Ami

If you have any issues with the site or suggestions to improve it, please do not hesitate to contact me and let me know!

If you wish to support Escher Girls, you can subscribe to our Patreon at: https://www.patreon.com/ami_angelwings or donate through Ko-Fi at: https://ko-fi.com/amiangelwings.

[sp00ky-scary]

I redesigned Harvey Dent

Basically all I did was make him gayer, anyway time for design notes and bonus Harvey without the coat

I'm not explaining how he became Two-Face because that would literally just be me explaining the lead up to and the plot of the Long Halloween with a few changes. I will however explain other parts of his life though… mostly just because I have to in order to explain his mental disorder. But what I will say is he and Bruce Wayne attended school together and were really good friends up until he became Two-Face. At which point their relationship became strained and difficult but Bruce would still describe them as friends, Two-Face idk if he would.

So basically as is almost a requirement for rogues at this point, Harvey had a really shit childhood. Mostly in relation to his father who was insanely abusive, this abuse led to Harvey developing DID (dissociative identity disorder) with his only alter being Harv (idk that's just the name I'm going with for now). Harv like in theory would be considered a protector but like he goes about it in not great ways, in some ways mirroring their fathers actions. Prior to becoming Two-Face, Harv like wouldn't front fully except when Harvey was in like really bad situations, and once Harvey left home was pretty I guess dormant until the Long Halloween stuff. To note Harvey was to some degree aware of Harv but didn't really understand like what was going on for a really long time. When Harvey had his mental break after the incident that left him disfigured, that and all the events leading up to it resulted in both Harvey and Harv fronting at the same time, and from then on it's very rare for only one of them to front. (I know that's like a bit illogical but we're also talking about Batman villains here).

I would like to clarify all the events during the Long Halloween prior to the incident were like 100% Harvey, like Harv was not involved, if anything Harv probably would've been more inclined to prevent Harvey's actions. Anyway personality time, pre Two-Face Harvey was basically a golden boy with a few anger issues, and despite his apparent belief in the justice system and doing stuff the right way, he didn't really adhere to all that (see literally everything that happened in the Long Halloween). Basically despite how others saw him as like a beacon of morality and like wanting the best for Gotham and being a good person, he like actually wasn't great, although admittedly as assistant D.A and D.A he did do some good work. Post becoming Two-Face he's obsessed with duality and his warped version of morality and justice, and is more openly violent. Harv isn't like the same as Harvey but they do share similarities, he's very defensive and protective, but he's more impulsive and his actions are based more on instinct and anger, and in terms of violence he's not more violent he's just a bit more sadistic. But really Harv exists in theory to do what's best for Harvey, and it isn't a case of Harvey's good and Harv's bad, both are complicated and the idea that one of them is good and the other is bad is a result of Harvey and his almost hatred of Harv, often projecting his issues onto him and for a long time believing that Harv is evil and a culmination of the negative parts of himself. Harvey had to spend a lot of years doing a lot of self reflection and therapy and stuff and it took him a long time to come to terms with Harv and the reality of their situation. I would like to note they do still have the coin gimmick, sometimes it is "do we do the right thing or the wrong thing" but sometimes the "right" thing and the "wrong" thing are both not great things, because as I said Harvey's prescribing to his own warped sense of morality and justice (also the coin is his dad's coin).

Okay design notes, he dresses pretty boring and basic before becoming Two-Face, because well he's a D.A not much room for fashion there, although he did always have some interest in fashion and like different styles of clothing but never got like the chance to explore that. As Two-Face they has the whole split gimmick with their clothes, the "Harvey" side often being nicer more toned down clothes, and the "Harv" side being more unusual clothes with clashing patterns and colours. Sometimes they do dress "nicer" but they'll still maintain the whole 50/50 split thing. As a result of the incident the left side of his face, part of the left of their neck, most of gis left hand and forearm, are disfigured, with a few patches across their chest and left upper arm from where the acid melted through Harvey's clothes. Don't question how he has more hair and how it's not really fried, comic logic. Also just to be "quirky" and "different" I guess his face isn't split exactly 50/50 I just liked the look of it being more uneven better. Oh also he still wears his wedding ring. Arkham, Two-Face is pretty chill unless someone sets them off so they don't have to deal with cuffs or a straight jacket or anything when out of their cell. I don't know how they got a mismatched uniform, I personally think it's funny if Arkham did it specially hoping that somehow it'd make them more content with being in a fucking asylum.

Random additional notes, they're bi, both Harvey and Harv although Harv doesn't particularly care for any kind of relationship. I wouldn't say they're friends with any of the rogues, but they've had close relationships with a few of them but those relationships do not last and often turn sour. I like to think they know how to sew and tailor and a lot of their clothes are made/modified by them. Also to clarify the use of both he/him and they/them pronouns. He/him is used if I'm referring to Harvey or Harv individually, they/them if I'm referring to them together since they do share a body and are both fronting the majority of the time.

[lesser-mook]

Fantastic Four #47 v6 (Sue, how do I love thee.)

Mixed bag on this, but the art was great.

Nice Sue-Centric issue, minus the narration boxes, author is trying too hard to vindicate Sue's greatness..

Villain was ass

narration bubbles began sweet at first (because husband professing love for his woman is great) then dragged onto self-indulgent pedestal propping for Susan, very cringe.

She's great but holy moly, dial it back.

Next, the Marvel Universe wouldn't exist if not for Sue Storm, writer needed to balance the romance with the sycophant energy, you can admire & sing the praises of your spouse and not sound desperate for a treat, Christ.

'I wouldn't have explored the stars if not for her. '

Whatever you say Reed. Your life's ambition would've remained grounded if not for this woman. That really takes away from his character and revolves all around Susan.

You don't have to diminish or be reductive of his accomplishments just to prop her up, its unnecessary and its predictable.

You'd never write that she only became what she decided to do with her life cause of a man, so don't do it the other way.

There's nothing "overlooked" about her contributions either, Reed/ *cough >>WRITER.

Are you tryna tell me people give more credit to the guy who's power is being a walking rock than the woman who's arguably the face of the goddamn team and spends almost every fight on crowd control which involves people SEEING what she can do and what she contributes.

Let's no even try to forget how old this team in the timeline, so how the fuck with her being the ONLY woman- is she overlooked, how lmfao.

That's the kind of stuff I'm talking about, needless gaslighting just to kiss her ass. Trying to make Sue into an underappreciated underdog when in reality, she's multiple MVP.

EASY MVP, like just put respect on her name without the weird shit man. It's simple.

Besides that cheesy garbage that unfortunately is littered throughout the issue, the art and story was solid. I like that Sue doesn't see herself as a "superhero", still even now, it's why she's not more powerful than she already is, she doesn't revel in that side of her life. She doesn't entertain it beyond necessity, not training or honing that Celestial tier power she has.

I don't like how Marvel shys from her other past, wasn't she a model or clothes designer? (Showbiz/actress) Is that not STEM enough for this current generation, now its explorer and activist lmfao. Kinda boring resume'.

I guess women aren't woman enough unless they fit a certain box nowadays, everyone's a genius now.

You better want to go in STEM ladies or else you're not womaning right.

maybe I remember it wrong, I coulda swore she was in fashion like Janet or perhaps, I'm conflating her with Janet (edit: Again, she dabbed in Showbiz, acting).

But regardless she's been in the game long enough to be Administrator for The Baxter building, that's a good move. She's mature enough to handle it while Reed is lost in his braincells.

Decent issue. So much better without the sycophant narration boxes though. The envelope was pushed a bit for me in the overtones, it's like: "I get it, alright? Relax."

The action panels are really, nice, pg 14 her assassinating the robo goes hard.

[animehouse-moe]

Skip and Loafer Episode 10: Scrambling and Dripping

Well, with The Sound of Music as the background, we finally begin to explore Shima's character in proper. Flashbacks to childhood, repressed feelings and thoughts, and resolutions and progression that drives his current self forward. There's certainly a lot going on, and a lot to share!

We start the episode off with Chris himself laying into Shima for his issues, which I thought was a nice touch. Without his friend, Shima probably wouldn't have made the progress he did this episode, nor would he have opened up near as much to his friends.

But before that I just wanted to muse over this layout. I thought it was really fun and cute at expressing the differences between Shima and Chris. It does so through stuff like the ice cream vs drink, but also the differences in their posture, the style of their uniform, and even their bags. I just thought it was interesting and a fun little piece to add that gives Chris his own personality.

Anyways, the line in question from Chris. I particularly like how he phrases it in terms of acting, almost to rub a bit more salt in the wound of Shima in regards to the issue.

Following up their diner conversation though is one that happens outdoors, which I find far more interesting. I really like how they show Chris to not be some perfect friend that has all the right words for Shima, but rather that he stumbles around and has thoughts that exist from his own point of view, like this one. It's not so much as he's confusing Shima's experience as a child actor, but that he sees it from a different perspective. Shima was also so happy and excited to be able to put that smile on his mother's face, and Chris picks up on that enjoyment from a different angle than the chains that Shima imposes on himself.

And then there's whatever this was. Absolutely caught me off guard and got a laugh out of me. The perfect ending to a chat between blossoming high school boys for sure.

We swiftly move from Shima and Chris' conversation to a montage of the prep for the festival, and while it's pretty well typical with what you'd expect, I liked this one little moment. All the other groups featured are chatting or saying something when they're on screen, but the pair that are in charge of the budget are totally silent. Really simple piece, but I got a good little laugh of it.

The montage wraps up just as quick as it comes in, and we get whisked away to the world of The Sound of Music for an explanation of the plot. Not really anything to write home about, but I really liked the art style they used for it. It's still in tune with the overall color and character designs and stuff, but provides just the right amount of artistic edge to separate it.

Anyways, they explain the story, they do a little musical piece as an example for viewers, and then they press onwards. I really like how they follow the camaraderie and excitement shared by the rehearsal with Mitsumi's isolation behind the scenes. The other students are smiling and working together, while Mitsumi stands idly in the background. She herself even wishes to be a part of what her class is doing this year, which creates a bittersweet yearning for her inclusion.

Now, I did say this was an episode about Shima, but here I am talking about Mitsumi? Well, that's because it's important in regards to how Shima reflects on a flashback that follows Mitsumi's scene here. I think it's a really important flashback in how things are shown, because through it all, we only ever see the smiles on Shima and his mother's faces. Every other emotion from anybody in that scene is otherwise hidden, and tells viewers a different story than what it is exactly that Shima experiences and feels when reliving that moment.

The flashback comes and goes, and so does Mitsumi in a whirlwind of outside of school work. She ends up missing her morning meeting, which the people involved assure her they're not worried about in the slightest.

But this is high school, and these kids don't know better.

I think it's a really great piece for both ends. The important message of course being, you never know how hard someone's trying. These two girls who are only in charge of the play, have no idea of the weight that Mitsumi carries around for their sake. And rather than hash out their concern or challenges (or just be more accepting) they choose to talk about her after the fact.

It's not bullying, but it's one of those pieces of high school life where people that haven't given anything up don't understand what others have done. Sympathy runs dry with those types of characters, and it's plain to see how here. It's not that they're being terrible towards Mitsumi because she missed their meeting, but they're talking poorly of her because of things that they don't understand. It's a very naïve thought to have, and drives home the selfishness of characters like that in a very straightforward way.

We don't dwell on this moment for long though, as Shima once more uses Mitsumi as his crutch for introspection. Seeing himself in her reflection, in his perceived fragility of Mitsumi, he begins to explore himself more and more. And through the flashback this time, we begin to piece things together more and more.

Shima doesn't particularly like acting, we know that as a "truth" from present Shima. But his mother doesn't see it like that. The pair form a positive feedback loop, where Shima's acting is meant to make his mother happy, and his mother's smile and love is what spurs Shima on to continue with acting. This time, we see that they're not wearing those smiles on their faces, but Shima's not currently acting. Once he does though, that light returns to the pair of them.

In contrast to this happy memory of acting bringing Shima and his mother joy, he moves onto placing himself in the shoes of his role in The Sound of Music, the gardener Johan. While not anything new or really exceptional from Shima at this point in the series, I think it's an important piece in how he views himself and the world he exists in. That his happiness is not his own, and that the only pieces of himself that are truly him are the negative aspects.

Even though he buys Mitsumi a drink and chats with her to lighten her mood. Even if he dances with her to get a laugh out of her. Even if he chooses to be in the play because his friends ask him to. Shima is incredibly adept at ignoring those positive aspects of himself, and instead places them on Mitsumi, atop a pedestal that remains far away from his reach.

But I'll explain that in a bit, look at this incredibly cute clip.

Alright, cute song and dance finished, back to what I was saying. What a hugely important even to follow up this little sequence. Once more, we find ourselves in that pathway/outdoor hallway from an earlier episode, but with the roles reversed. This time, it's not Shima leaving Mitsumi behind, but it's Mitsumi leading the way for Shima. Such an important piece of symbolism and progression for him. He's not hiding a "secret" or being a shallow friend to Mitsumi. He's bearing his heart to this girl, and in turn Mitsumi is guiding Shima towards his happiness and the acceptance of himself and his past. That pedestal still exists, but even if it's only ever so slightly, Shima feels like he's gotten closer to reaching Mitsumi.

And then there's this piece as well, if that visual wasn't enough.

And this is where the episode leaves us, as the students work tirelessly to bring their ambitions towards reality. It's a really great piece that doesn't neglect the great world around Shima, but also doesn't try too hard to represent it. This is his episode, and they want us to know that. They want us to focus on the childhood memories and trauma that chains him within, of the guilt and repression and justification he uses to exist how he does currently.

But they also want to show us how far he's come. How much he cares for another person, how much he wants to be happy and have the life that he wants. That he wants to work towards standing alongside Mitsumi, rather than leaving her behind or forcing her to guide him. It's just really really well done, and delivers on the storyline we've had since day 1. It's not finished yet, not by a mile, but we're getting progress and getting to see Shima start to want to grow.

[galactic-feelins]

Finally got back into a drawing mood and my apple pencil went ahead and died on me! Yippee? So it's traditional pencil on notecards time until that's fixed <3

For now I figured I should at least share some of my thoughts lately, if not for people that are interested then at least as a reminder I'm not dead on this blog yet!

So I've talked vaguely about the 4-way crossover that's somehow become a 5-way, but I really wanted to get a reference chart for the gang and give basic summaries and stuff about each of the characters involved. Unfortunately with digital no longer an option that's probably going to take a bit. For now I'm gonna talk about the local Phantom in the mix.

Danny Fenton in the crossover crew is the same as the one in my Clueless au (that's what I'm calling it for now until I have a better name for it) because it's easier for me to keep track of that way and also it's more interesting to me. This au is not quite an everybody knows au, but not quite canon-adjacent either. Everyone knows SOMETHING but not enough for the whole picture, often jumping to conclusions that are detrimental at best. Due to other circumstances as I've decided, it's also a ghost king au, which is the catalyst to him joining the crossover crew to skirt those responsibilities entirely.

What I have so far is that Sam and Tucker know due to being present for the portal accident, while Jazz finds out about Phantom in the same way she does in canon. Danny's mom is the most noteworthy discovery as she comes home just late enough to see Phantom transform without him noticing, thus coming to the conclusion that her son is missing and Phantom stole his place for unknown reasons. Other classmates find out through individual circumstances and keep silent out of worry, either believing they're seeing things that aren't real or believing that saying anything would inadvertently kill their classmate. Ghosts find out through their own means, but after the king Dark incident things get messy.

After defeating Pariah Dark in a 1 on 1 duel and stealing the crown, the title of king gets a little... muddled. He did not kill Pariah, only sealing him away for presumedly eternity, but he also quite literally stole the crown from him in a duel to the death. From that point on it seems the crown itself is drawn to Phantom, and the moment the rest of the ghost zone catches wind of Phantom as the king to be, Amity Park's peace is thoroughly out the window. By the time Danny's aware of what he's done it's far too late, as he wakes up one morning he finds the crown sitting right next to his bed as if placed as a warning, and that's the first he ever hears of this issue at all.

Anyway so I can draw small snippets of ideas on note cards (which is what I'm doing tonight apparently) but I can't get anything big and lengthy for a bit! I do have some ideas for different designs and ghosts to have show up, some new some old, but maybe that's for a different post

[bts-polls]

hi. i know this blog is just for fun, and i don't want to be a downer, but jk rowling is a terf. she actively does not want trans people to exist. as a trans army, it makes me wildly uncomfortable when people who aren't fans are called 'muggles' or when people Sort the members. again, i know it's all supposed to be fun, but. i don't feel at all safe anymore whenever hp stuff is brought up. i hope you have a good day though <3

Hi anon,

First, before I get into the rest of my response I want to say that I while i can't truly empathize on this specific issue, I do sympathize with not feeling safe due to a marginalization from 'the mainstream'. I do apologize for any part my posts played into this for you and anyone else that may have seen them. I'm going to put the rest of my thoughts on this topic below a cut for anyone that isn't up for a discussion-type post from this blog.

HP was my first real fandom and as someone who was raised in an extremely conservative rural area, I'm unfortunately very familiar with this mindset and viewpoint.

I also had to do a hefty amount of soul-searching when deciding how much of hp-fandom I would continue to engage in. I've never been a merch-focused person (which honestly gave me some heartache getting into kpop..there are legit ppl out there that try to make you feel like a fake fan if you don't spend serious money on this interest... but that's a discussion for another day). Anyway, back to HP, I'm not into merch and I didn't like the movies, (I've still only seen the first two and a handful of clips from some of the others) so I'm personally not contributing anymore to the money channeling in but money isn't the only thing that fuels this massive engine.

Again, I had to have a very frank heart-to-heart with myself to see where I personally feel comfortable continuing to engage. For me, being involved in the Fandom to any degree and even having casual conversations about the themes and meanings was an essential part of learning to be curious enough to see more lifestyles different from the one I was raised in. And my story is not dissimilar from many that I knew in situations similar to mine. So I know that this body of work has actually had cases where it fosters discussions and mindsets for minority groups more than anything else of its time. I really cannot overstate how significant the HP books and fandom were in creating the first space where we were able to even explore the idea of being different from those around us, let alone feeling comfortable or even celebrating it. To us, HP was less about the magic of being able to move items without touching them but more about the magic of finding your own worth when everyone around you said otherwise. This concept takes different forms each generation, for some it's superheroes or musicians; for my generation, it was HP.

Do the unveiled viewpoints of the original creator now undo all of the progress that was triggered by her work? And should we all attempt to bury it as if it never happened? Another point of discussion, especially where I now live in the southern US with many entrenched systems of racial discrimination. (Again, another tangent but we're not here to talk about tearing down ugly statues that don't add any value to the current population).

There's also the literal logistical issue of deciding that I can't engage in anything because I don't agree with the views of the ppl in charge, then there will literally be no viable method to exist. My professional expertise is in systems design, implementation, and maintenance; and let me assure you, the world is legitimately run by people who have despicable beliefs. From entertainment, food manufacturing and distribution, to health care and politics; there are scummy mindsets infecting it all. The biggest lie in our society is that good ppl do good things and bad ppl do bad things. No. People with awful motivations do good things continuously. And the inverse is true as well. There is remarkably little black and white in the world, everything is on a spectrum.

Attempting to cut myself off from ALL of it is not possible, nor do I want to engage with ALL of it. So again, I need to decide where that line is. And it needs to be re-evaluated frequently as both myself and the world around me grows and changes.

But this really comes to my main point of this whole post. I had to do my own personal soul-searching to decide where my own boundary is with this issue. And each person should do so as well. We are all so beautifully different in our life experiences and thoughts and mindset. I would NEVER want to claim my personal boundary on any issue should be upheld for ANYONE else. That's where we must empower ourselves to understand our own sovereignty. I have complete control of how I choose to respond to a push of my boundary but not to dictate that others must place their own boundaries.

This is where we are right now. I recognize that my past actions have induced some harm, intentional or not. Again, I apologize for that. I've shared a few reasons why we have different viewpoints and may continue to create similar polls in the future. So, to move forward, I will be more diligent in tagging any polls so that anyone trying to avoid such content may do so. You will have to decide if that is sufficient for you or if you will need to also disengage here.

Whatever you choose, I do wish you the absolute best and thankyou for bringing this lapse to my attention. Like you said, this is intended to be a fun place where we can vote in meaningless tumblr polls about a group of guys in Korea that make music. I would never want to compromise someone's peace with something so trivial but I am just another stranger on the internet. The one thing I can do is try to give you the tools so that you can make informed decisions about what type of content you may encounter in my space.

I'm not looking to turn this blog into a discussion one, so if anyone wants/needs to chat further, please reach out in DMs or through my main blog @curio-queries . This blog will continue to focus on BTS polls.

BORAHAE 💜

[pbandjesse]

I just got home from hanging out with Jule. It was such a nice time and a really nice way to end the day. I am tired, today was long. But it was a really nice day and I feel pretty happy inside.

I slept later then planned. Waking up at 830. I meant to wake up at 730. Oops. I only really woke up because Alexi called me to ask me a question. I felt so bad! We had just been up late having fun and talking and being silly. After I finished my post last night I was just having to much fun being with my husband. Laughing and joking and being in love! Which lead to me oversleeping.

But it was fine. I got up and apologized to Alexi. I was a little frazzled and would leave without checking on sweetp, for the first time. Which was the worst time to do so because when James got home at 5 they discovered Sweetp had been in the basement the entire day!!! He's fine but I felt so bad!! We need to put a second litter box down there just in case this happens again. He thankfully didn't pee on anything but I wouldn't have blamed him if that did happen. 8 hours!

I didn't know that he was trapped though and left for work.

I had a very easy drive in. And got to camp at 930. But while there was no traffic that does not mean I did not have issues. I had tried to eat my egg sandwich while driving and it exploded and yoke went all down to cleavage. Like really everywhere. It was horrible. I had to pull over on the side of the highway and use napkins and water to clean myself up. And I thankfully did a good job and was fine. I barely got it on my clothes, mostly just on my skin. It felt gross but I was able to get cleaned up and was only a little upset about it.

When I got to camp I jumped right into my computer work. I didn't want to lose motivation.

I had schedule updates and lessons and printing and printing and printing. I would print and organize all of the programs and lessons and schedules. I could binder clip them with labels so when they get copied next week it will be easier to figure out. And instead of printing from the computers we can just make copies. So whoever is tasked with that won't have to use a laptop which is always a problem. Problem hopefully solved.

All this printing and organizing and stuff took a few hours. I would stop for lunch. And during lunch I purchased a new lash perm kit so I can have nice lashes for camp and not feel self conscious. I don't wear eye liner during camp but I like mascara but also if I just have nice lashes I will feel prettier. I would also find a new eye cream. I would text with James and checked in with Jule. We were still on for dinner.

I had more tasks for the afternoon. Creating binders for each specialty program. I would design little covers and made sure each binder has a schedule and all the lessons and other information for each group. I really hope that these can be helpful for them. Especially because half of them won't be here next week. Which is tough but we'll make it work. I'm excited to work with them. And officially I am specialty senior staff and I'm super excited about it.

I would have some meeting with Alexi and Heather. And would send some emails. I was put in charge of sending a form for people to write how they want their name tags to appear. The form was two questions "what would you like your name tags to say (Ms, Mr, Mx, coach, your majesty, your honor, pronouns optional)" and "would you like your job title on your name tag?" This was mainly because not everyone knows their jobs yet and also some people will move around so it's not a fixed answer. I was excited to see by the time I was finishing for the day we had 13 responses and it was really interesting to see what people wanted to be referred to as! It was nice.

I spent the last half hour taking a quiz for camp. I had to answer a question they make us answer every year that I disagree with so much. "True or false. It's okay for kids to be bored." And they say it's false!! They say that kids should be involved and active every hour and every minute. That's the langue they use. I think that's insane and also not developmentally appropriate! Kids need to be okay with being bored. With solving being bored without us entertaining them!! It makes me crazy that that's what they are saying when it's not true. I also just think they are being honest. That they know there are situations where boredom will happen but they are not being honest about that. This is why I hate true and false because there is so much nuance so I have to answer based on what they want rather then what it actually true.

I still passed the test though so it's fine.

I would head out at 4 but I decided I would waste time so I could go directly to dinner with Jule.

I would go to goodwill first. Where I found a very fluffy wearable blanket. I had a nice little conversation with the cashier. And then I tried to go to Aldi but the GPS took me to one that isn't open yet?? So instead I went to Lidil. Where I got a chocolate pastry and some sauces to keep at camp. To replace last year's specialty ketchup. Now we have a new ketchup and also boom boom sauce. Amazing.

I made one more stop at Target to use their bathroom and buy a body oil I was i influenced to buy. I hope it makes my skin feel nice.

I would go to Hamden to meet Jule. And it was such a nice time!

I got a parking space pretty quick. And got a little turned around because it turned out this place's front door is in the alley. But it ended up being so cool! Jule was really nice. And wicked smart.

We ordered our food. I got a tofu bun that was so good?? Would have again. I also got a Thai tea. And we sat and talked.

She works with the UN. And I loved hearing all about how her job works. She helps with policy for humanitarian work. Just completely outside my realm of knowledge and that was awesome. I love learning a lot different worlds. And she was just so nice to talk to. We would hang out for two hours and we got so much covered in that time. It was so fun.

After we finished eating we would walk around Hamden. We came across a little craft market. Where I got business cards and made connections to invite people to apply at the farmers market. One stained glass maker specifically, I hope she comes because her work was so nice.

We would continue our walk. We went around the park. Talked about skateboarding and our families. Eventually she said she would like ice cream so we went to the charmery.

She got Lady Grey, which is a tea flavor, and I got the lemon stick, which was a lemon with peppermint. It was so light and nice. We got there before the crowd. We sat on the bench inside and talked and people watched and it was really nice.

I really hope we find time to hang out again. She said we should go hiking sometime. I am excited to have a new friend.

I shook her hand at the end because I thought it was funny. But we had a goodbye hug and went on our way.

I had to walk a few blocks to my car. But it was a nice walk. And I was very happy.

I went home and was so happy to see my James and Sweetp. Omelet was swimming around and looking so good. I'm thrilled that adding two new friends has made him so so good.

James had brought in my package which was my new orange platform Crocs. I'm really excited for them. I love an ugly shoe so much.

Me and James sat in the kitchen and talked. But eventually I came up here to take a shower and start winding down for the evening.

Now James is here and I'm ready to get in bed. Today was a really good day.

Tomorrow is going to be very busy. With market and museum. But that's fine. I'm looking forward to a good day.

I hope you all have a good day too. Sleep well. I love you all. Until next time.

[directactionforhope]

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[spinningbuster98]

Mega Man X7 Part 1

So I know that technically speaking Zero 1 should be next since it came out the year after X6 but y’know what? There’s only 2 X games left, might as well do them sooner rather than later. Besides the Zero series has a much more connected story throughout its games so it’s more fitting to do them all in sequential order without interruptions.

It’s just too bad that we now have to deal with quite possibly one of the worst games ever made

X7′s issues are much more...explicit than X6′s. You can spot them just by looking at it.

Probably the first thing you’ll notice is just how ugly it looks. This is a 2003 PS2 game, this thing came out at the same time as Sonic Heroes and yet it looks like a Dreamcast game, if the character models were completely and utterly inexpressive, the characters animated like actual puppets (and barely at that) and the environments looked as bland and uninspired and murky as fuck. The opening stage is a recreation of X1′s (because X7 came out to celebrate the X series’ 10th anniversary, now where have I seen a similar situation before?), and it just serves to further drive home the point of how despicably low we’ve fallen

So this game wants to be 3D. Well 3D and 2D as well, with different sections in each level. Barring Legends, which was 3D but kinda cheated by having a different gameplay style altogether, this is technically the first....and only time a traditional Mega Man game has ever been translated into 3D.

You may already spot the main issues, like the camera being stuck in this pseudo bird’s eye view half the time while also being stuck to your ass, making it damn awkward to see where you’re going during 3D sections, especially when platforming is involved.

Another big issue that you wouldn’t notice unless you were playing this is the controls: the characters feel sluggish, slow, they have little sense of fluidity, 3D sections, with their extra spacious design, pretty much require you to dash jump all over the place if you intend of moving at a pace that’s greater than that of entropy and wall jumping feels awkward as hell with the characters jumping way too far away from the wall and the camera moving alongside them even in the 2D sections

The game has an auto lock on, because the devs must have figured that it would be needed in a 3D space and it is, but this also means that Mega Man’s trademark gameplay style of taking aim and firing is neutered since now you can just spam a button indisciminately and stuff will die. They won’t die immediately  because enemies like to be tanky and you can get knocked on your ass by stuff like explosions, which does WONDERS for this game’s pacing but hey.

Word of advice: go to the options and turn on rapid fire. Trust me you’ll see later why you’d wanna do this

Anothe thing you may have noticed is the voice acting

MM8 and X4 are infamous for their voice acting but y’know what? They were somewhat charming in a “so bad it’s funny” kind of way, plus I could count the voiced cutscenes on one hand

X7′s can get funny in a memey sort of way but mostly it’s fucking ear-grating

Zero sounds half decent but the direction they gave the actor makes him sound like he’s changed his mind about coming back to life and now just wants to gp back to the void

Signas is voiced by Robert Belgrade, the man who voiced Alucard in Symphony of The Night, probably the only voice actor in that game who put any kind of genuine effort (besides Dracula’s in his own way). Here though he sounds completely zoned out, like he’s here fot the check and nothing else

Alia sounds like a timid teenage girl

Axl sounds like every annoying shonen kid stereotype all rolled up into one

And X

Ooooh X....

So unlike what my previous criticisms of Zero becoming the de facto protagonist of the series for a while (and my profile picture) may have suggested I actually don’t have a lot of love for X aside from his design.

The series has just never done anything of substance with his concept of being the first robot capable of true free will, and due to his general lack of dialogue and interesting story beats when compared to Zero he just doesn’t amount to much kre than “angsty Mega Man”, like he’s exactly like Rock except you swap out his childlike optimism and drive with lots of angst and doubt. On paper this should be enough to make X different enough but in practice, like I said, the execution has simply never been there.

Theoretically a story where X decides to no longer fight the good fight because he can’t take it any longer would be great; not only is it very human but it also showcases X’s ability to make his own choices in a negative way by having him make a bad decision. It’s a far more interesting idea than simply having him go evil as was the original idea behind the Zero series....which actually ended up having X also retire from fighting out of sheer mental exhaustion before X7 was even a thing.

However what we get here is one of the worst cases of flanderizaton I have ever seen

In past games X would have usually only 1 brief (BRIEF) moment where he laments that he has to once again take up arms and fight to save the world. He’s a pacifist at heart so it makes sense.

X7 makes it X’s entire personality. And in the whiniest, most hateable way possible. And I don’t mean Shinji Ikari kind of whiny.

He just stands there at HQ doing fuck all all day (as far as we can see at least), criticizing others for using violence to deal with dangerous criminals, while not coming up with a better alternative and just being a douchebag overall. He sounds like your average Twitter user who rants about the injustices of the world and how other people are shit for not doing anything about them while they themselves are just sitting there typing at a keyboard from their mother’s basement.

That moment when he tells Red that if he wants Axl back he can have him because he has no intention of fighting for the likes of him is fucking putrid. He’s literally saying that he’s A-OK with handing over a kid, even if a troubled and irresponsible one, to a criminal organization just because “fighting bad”.

It’s pretty funny. Inafune has long left the series and you can tell because Zero is no longer the center of the universe, but now this new dev team want to impose ANOTHER main character in the form of Axl and X is treated worse than ever.

And we’re just getting started