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chaotic-mystery · 1 year ago

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Not A Survivalist Girl Part 5:

“I want to fucking tear you apart”

Written by @chaotic-mystery & @tightjeansjavi

( Joel Miller x f!reader )

Summary: You finally get what you've been waiting for from Joel but you quickly realize he's not a gentle lover, he's far from it and so are you. Your foul mouth has landed you in a world of pain with Joel and he's not letting you off easy.

Warnings: consensual rough sex, heavy degradation (slut, whore, cockslut, stupid girl) praise kink, pet names (good girl, daddy,) sir kink, pain/humiliation kink, dom/sub, choking, spitting, throat fucking, oral (m and f receiving), fingering, orgasm denial, edging, cream pie, unprotected p in v, doggy style and breeding pose, overstimulation, filth, mean!Joel, dark! Joel, rough! Joel, possessive! Joel, talking you through it, hair pulling, biting, smacking (if you squint) no after care, porn, NSFW (+18) minors dni!

WC:5.7k

A/N: Gi and I were giggling the whole time writing this, so I hope you guys are ready for it. This can be read as a stand alone if you aren’t familiar with our series! Love you angels, let us know what you think! 🖤

Was he being serious right now? Was he really going to sit there and tell you that you didn’t mean something you said? You scoffed as your mouth dropped a bit, “I always mean what I say, Joel. You are beautiful and nothing is too rough to me, big boy.” Let’s see how he likes those apples.

Joel could feel what was left of his rationale was dissipating before his very eyes. It crumbled like sand pulverized by crashing waves. Fluttered like ash from a burning fire disappearing into the thick blanket of black in the night sky. His pupils expanded, darkened as the fire's warm glow flickered against his irises. The close proximity to you was spinning his mind in fast circles. Your exposed skin begging to be touched by his calloused hands, and wet mouth. He swallowed hard, the Adams of his apple bobbing as his gaze met yours. He wet his lips with one swipe of his tongue as all the blood in his body flowed southward, straight to his strained cock that was pressing painfully against the confines of his worn boxers.

“You’re playin’ with some dangerous fire right now, girlie. You sure you wanna do that?” His brow raised as he leaned in close, close enough that you could taste the whiskey on his breath and feel the heat radiating from his body. “I’ll give ya one chance to take back what ya just said. After that..” He trailed off as his eyes flitted down to your lips. His hand reached out, cupping your jaw as his thumb dragged across your lower lip, tugging the soft skin down with his thumbnail. “C’mon. Use those big girl words and tell me you don’t fuckin’ want this. C’mon, girlie. This is your one chance to back out while you still can.”

“You tell me if I don’t want this” you whisper as you put his hand over your clothed cunt, feeling how wet your panties became since he started touching you. You moved your hand over his and showed him how you wanted him to relieve the built up anticipation in your panties. His rough hand slid the thin fabric to the side and like magnets attracted to one another, his fingers found where you needed him most. A groan escaped Joel’s lips as he caressed every inch of your soaking wet folds. Your whimpers filled the cabin walls and you were growing hungrier for him by the second. It wasn’t enough that he was just in your panties, you needed to show him how badly you’ve waited for this.

Part of you wondered if he thought of you whenever he flipped through his dirty magazines touching himself. Your hands found his broad shoulders and you helped yourself into his lap, making sure his hand never escaped your panties. Joel started circling your clit faster, his hand on the small of your back to hold you close against him. “God dammit do you know how long I’ve waited for this, Joel? Fucking Christ I-” you cut yourself off by crashing your lips onto his like you’d never get the chance to kiss him again. Your hips started bucking against his hand and you found a delicious rhythm between the two of you.

“Did I fuckin’ say you could kiss me?” He growled against your lips, fingertips digging harshly into your lower back, nails scraping against the skin. “Did I fuckin’ say you could even touch me?” He bit down on your lower lip hard, tasting copper along his tongue as his teeth broke through the delicate skin. He drank in your whimpers as his fingers continued to play with your clit. “Such a fuckin’ little slut throwin’ yourself at me like this. Fuckin’ my hand like a bitch in heat.” He tsked under his breath. “You gonna let me do whatever I want to you? Huh girlie?” He smacked your clit with his fingers once, then again as your body jolted forward. “You want this that bad, huh? Your little clit is gettin’ all puffy n’swollen for me. Hurts a little doesn’t it baby? Yeah, I bet it does. You poor poor thing.”

You breathed in sharply as he smacked your clit and your fingers tangled in his hair, pulling at the root firmly. “You aren’t gonna tell me what to do right now, Joel. You always tell me what to do, not this time.” You hissed at him and dug your nails into his back while you were still tugging at his hair with your other hand. He was right though, it felt so good it hurt but god did you fucking need this.

“You wanna fuckin’ bet on that girlie?” He removed his hand from your cunt, fingers wet with your slick as he wrapped his hand around the base of your throat, squeezing down along your windpipe just enough that you’d have tears welling up in your eyes. He wanted to turn you into a fucking blubbering mess. His eyes bore into yours as he used his upper body strength to push you off his lap and onto the carpet below. He pinned you down beneath his weight, using his knees to keep your thighs spread apart as you felt the heavy weight of his concealed cock bulging against the thin fabric along the soft swell of your tummy.“Here’s how this is gonna fuckin’ go. You’re gonna shut that smart ass mouth of yours, and get on your fuckin’ knees. You want this so fuckin’ bad?” He chuckled as he dragged the bridge of his nose against your cheek, inhaling your sweet strawberry scent. “Well, you’re gonna fuckin’ take whatever I give to ya.”

A smirk formed on your face as you closed your eyes for just a second to take it all in, and nodded in agreement. Joke was on him, you wanted him to man handle you and get rough. “Well c'mon then daddy, show me how big your cock is since you want it in my mouth so badly.” You egged him on to pull it out, you knew it was big. You may or may not have seen it once when he was getting out of the shower and he left the door open just a crack. It wasn’t intentional, he probably knew you were going to get up to get food and decided to give you a peek.

Joel nibbled along the soft skin on your cheek, dragging his lips and tongue down your exposed neck as he continued to inhale your aroma. It was as if he couldn’t get enough of it. Truthfully, he was more than compliant to lick every inch of your skin like the dirty man he was. “You want my cock? Then get on your fuckin’ knees. Don’t make me ask you again.” He slipped his hand down from where it was wrapped around your throat, bringing it down over himself, palming his cock through the fabric. You could see a dark wet patch from where the head of his cock had weeped a few beads of salty precum through the thin material.

You practically jumped up to your knees with eagerness and placed your hands on your thighs, waiting for him to pull his underwear down. The wet patch was making your head spin and you were growing needier and needier. Looking up at him with big puppy dog eyes, you teased him by licking your bottom lip and taking it between your teeth slowly before releasing it. You wanted to reach down between your thighs and play with yourself, but what would Joel say if he caught you doing that? When have you ever cared what he’d say? You tossed the idea to the side and did exactly that, shoved your hand right down your panties and rubbed circles over your clit.

Joel was certain that this was actually the prettiest sight he had ever laid his undeserving eyes on. How could someone be so fucking eager for him? Here you were, sitting on your knees like the compliant good girl that you were. Nearly drooling at the sight of him. God, he wanted to fuck your face. Stuff you full of his cock till you couldn’t breathe. He wanted to see tears streaming down your cheeks just so he could wipe them away with a calloused thumb. He knew right then and there as you unashamedly played with yourself under the fire’s glow, that you were something mixed between an Angel, and the Devil. A sinner just like he was. “Look at you. So fuckin’ needy for me. Lemme see her. Let me see how wet she is for me. You’re just a dirty little slut, huh girlie? Just a dirty little cockslut.” He palmed himself over the fabric as his eyes slightly lolled back into his skull. He could barely handle it anymore as he finally pushed his boxers down and his cock sprang free, slapping up against his stomach. Thick, veiny, the ruddy head dribbled in pre-cum, just for you.

Your lustful eyes watched as his cock emerged from his boxers and you swear you were seeing stars. There was no way that was going to fit inside you, but you were absolutely willing to try. You were going to make it fit inside you. Just hearing how he talks about your pussy made you gush with excitement and only made you want to play with yourself more. Without standing up you managed to shimmy out of your panties, tossing them at Joel’s chest. As you lean back while still on your knees, you spread your cunt for him to see it glisten and admire how pretty it is. You wanted him to see what he was about to destroy, what was soon going to be all his.

Joel wrapped his fist around the base of his cock, giving it a few firm tugs as his eyes glazed over, in a trance at watching you play with yourself. “Now that’s a fuckin’ gorgeous sight if I ever seen one..” he let out a harsh puff of air. “Can’t wait to fuckin’ get my mouth on ya. Only if you’re a good girl f’me.”

He scooted closer to you on his knees, cock heavy in his fist as his free hand cupped your cheek, softly at first, before you felt the pads of his fingertips digging into the soft flesh on your cheek, “Open that fuckin’ mouth of yours f’me. Nice and wide. Wanna see that pretty ‘lil throat I’m gonna fuck.”

Almost desperately doing what he said before he finished his sentence, you opened your mouth wide and stuck out your tongue waiting to be fed. You hummed quietly as you sat there, ready for him to fuck your face. It felt like butterflies took control over your stomach, forget butterflies actually; it felt like the whole damn zoo took control over your stomach. Never once did you peg Joel Miller to be the teasing type to make you beg to have his cock down your throat but here you were, begging.

Joel watched you with hooded eyes. His pupils were blown out, dilated as he was zoning in on his prey. His next meal. You looked dumbly pretty, obeying him like this. So willing, so needy. “That’s a good girl.” He praised you before releasing his tight grip that he had on your face, bringing his hand back to lightly smack you on the cheek. It was a loving smack. Before you could react, he shoved two of his thick fingers right down your throat, pressing them down harshly over your tongue to make you gag. “So fuckin’ pretty for me. You’re so good at always runnin’ that fuckin’ mouth of yours. I’m gonna take care of that issue for you, okay baby? Gonna stuff that pretty little throat of yours with my cock.” He slipped his fingers out, leaning directly over you as he dragged the head of his cock across your parted lips. “Keep that mouth nice and wide for me, that’s it baby. Good girl.” He rasped before he spat a glob of saliva right down into your awaiting mouth, watching as some of it dripped down the side of his cock. “Now, lick that up f’me. Nice and slow.”

There was nothing else you needed to say to him, now it was time to play and get played with. You got on all fours as you dipped your head down to where the saliva dripped to the base of his cock and with a flattened tongue you licked all the way from the shaft to the very tip as slow as you could go. Of fucking course you wanted to swallow his cock whole but you needed to make him wait just as much as he made you wait. You had to let him feel every inch of your tongue glide over his rock hard cock and coat it in spit before you shoved it down your throat. When you reached the head, you swirled your tongue over the tip and gathered all the pre-cum he was constantly spilling. As you grab his cock and begin to jerk him off slowly, you look at him and grin, “You’re gushing like a fucking tube of lip gloss, baby. Such a whore for me huh?”

It had been so fucking long since Joel had felt the warmth of a wet mouth around his cock. The almost instant euphoria washed over him as he took in a shuddered inhale. His hand had found its way to the back of your head grasping your hair tightly in his fist as a slew of profanities slipped past his parted lips. “Fuuuck. Jesus Christ, if I woulda known your mouth was this good, I would have put it to good use sooner.” He gripped your hair tighter as the muscles under his stomach clenched inwards. His head tilted back slightly before his gaze fell on you once more. Eyes narrowed as he yanked your head upwards harshly. “The only fuckin’ whore in this room is you girlie. Get to fuckin’ work. It ain’t gonna suck itself.”

Even when he was horny he refused to laugh at a silly thing like what you just said, go figure. He wanted his cock sucked? That’s exactly what he was gonna get. You leaned down and placed your hands between your knees to hold yourself up as you maneuvered his cock back into your mouth. As you started to bob your head back and forth, you hummed against him while trying to take him whole. You gagged when the head hit the back of your throat but you weren’t a quitter, you didn’t push him away. Instead, you shook your head from side to side for a few seconds and then released him from your mouth, starting the same thing over and over. Your whiny moans were muffled from his cock being shoved in your mouth but he still felt them vibrate against his thick shaft. Looking up at him as you release him once more, a string of spit connected from your mouth to the tip of his cock and he really got to see how desperate you were for him. “Tell me I look pretty like this. That I look so beautiful with your cock shoved down my throat, tears spilling while I choke on you.”

“Fuck yeah, that’s it. Good girl. Suckin’ me off like the good little cockslut that you are.” He rocked his hips forward when he felt the head of his cock reach the back of your throat. “You look so fuckin’ pretty like this girlie. Throat stuffed with my cock. So fuckin’ beautiful.” He hissed under his breath as he brought his freehand up to his mouth, biting down on his fist. “You got two hands for a reason, don’tcha? Play with your needy little pussy while you suck me off. C’mon. I wanna see how wet you can get yourself f’me. Wanna see you drippin’ all over the fuckin’ carpet.”

He didn’t have to tell you twice to touch yourself, so you reached down between your thighs and ran your fingers through your soaking wet slit, listening to the faint clicking sounds you made as you rubbed around your throbbing clit. Just seeing him so worked up over your mouth was enough motivation to cum right there all over the floor but you had to pace yourself. You took his cock in your mouth and went all the way down until your nose bumped the base of his cock and you gagged a bit, a moan mixing in there somewhere. Not even wondering if he’d like it, you grabbed his cock with your freehand and held it to the side and sucked up one of his balls into your mouth. Your tongue toyed with it while you sucked firmly before releasing it with a pop sound. If he didn’t like his balls being sucked before this moment, he does now.

Joel doesn’t think he’s going to last much longer with you like this. No, he knows he is not going to last much longer. His eyes are hooded, glazed over as he watches you suck one of his balls into your mouth. The tears that were welling in your eyes from deep throating him sent an animalistic growl coursing up his throat. In one swift movement he was yanking your head away from his cock as he squeezed your face harshly, causing your swollen lips to pucker. “Now, that is enough.” He narrowed his eyes down at you, zoning in on the bit of precum dribbled along your chin. “You enjoyed that, huh girlie? You loved havin’ my cock shoved down your throat? Yeah, of course you did. What am I gonna do with you now?...” He had a grin playing on his lips as he observed you with harsh scrutiny. “Think I wanna have a taste of exactly how wet I got your pussy. She’s glistenin’ ain’t she?” His lips parted mockingly in an o shape as his hand slipped between your thighs, brushing the back of his knuckles across your puffy, swollen lips. “You think I should have a taste? See just how sweet you really are?”

“Y-yes please sir, please put your mouth on me, I-I need you so badly- fuckk” you cry out and grind against his hand, your brows furrowing in pleasure. He was getting you so hot and bothered you were so close to getting up and riding his face. He had the perfect nose for it, too. You laid flat on your back and spread your arms out, running your hands over the carpet under your palms. You were practically getting into position for him, all he had to do was put that gorgeous face between your legs.

Sir.

Now that was something that Joel Miller could 100% get behind. “Sir? Mmm. Now we’re talkin.’” He grabbed ahold of your ankles beneath his rough palms and just when you thought he was finally going to nestle his head between your open thighs, he roughly flipped you over in one swift movement so you were laying on your stomach. You felt his arm swoop in under your middle as he forced you to arch your back at an uncomfortable angle. Your ass in the air as you felt his hands pry the soft flesh of your ass cheeks apart. He didn’t allow you a grace period to get comfortable in the new position he had contorted you in. Oh no, he didn’t want to waste any more precious time. His mouth was on you in an instant, tongue lapping at the sticky sweet slick between your folds, while his nose was firmly pressed against your clit. He was eating you like a man starved, groaning against you as he reached down between his own thighs and grabbed ahold of the base of his cock, giving it a few firm tugs. He pulled back momentarily, only to spit all over your already soaked cunt. He lapped up his own saliva, mixed with the addictive taste of your arousal. He was positively feral as he dove his tongue into your tight wet hole, fucking you with the wet muscle. “Taste so fuckin’ sweet, girlie. All f’me? This cunt? It belongs to me. All fuckin’ mine.” He growled against you, mouthful of your pussy as he shook his head back and forth vigorously. “All. Fuckin.’ Mine.”

Your nails clawed at the carpet as you whined Joel’s name, begging him to keep going just how he was. If this was the way you could die, you’d go happy. You pressed your cheek against the floor as you moaned louder with every swipe his tongue did over your clit, and boy did he know where the clit was. Joel wasn’t like anyone else you had been with before. Most of them took a few looks at your boobs and that was enough for them to cum to while they attempted to fuck you. Not a single one gave you this much attention, praised you exactly how you wanted to be praised. Joel Miller owned you. “Fuuuck daddy, don’t stop. That’s the spot. I promise you I’m all yours, I swear. You make me feel so fucking good, my god.” you squealed and bounced your ass a little to create friction against his tongue.

Joel scraped his teeth across your clit as he wrapped his lips around it and sucked on the little bud harshly. “I ain’t your fuckin’ daddy, girlie. You fuckin’ call me sir or I don’t let you cum.” His arm that was firmly wrapped around your middle yanked you further back into his face. He was ready to drown in your fucking pussy at this point. Get drunk off your taste along his tongue. “You’re all fuckin’ mine. You got that? You cum when I say you fuckin can.”

He’s a fucking pro at this, must’ve done it a lot before the outbreak, you thought to yourself while his mouth worked on you. Reaching behind you and grabbing the back of his head to make sure his face is as deep as he can make it, you moan his name louder with every flick of his tongue. The way he slurped up your juices like he was starving, the way his groans vibrated against you, Joel Miller was the devil himself. “Let me cum please, sir. I wanna cum for you so bad” you barely managed to get out.

“You think a fuckin’ slut like you gets to cum?” He mumbled against your soaked cunt. He pulled his face from between your thighs. His chin, beard, and lips were coated in your slick. He didn’t give you much time to recover as he slipped two fingers into your wet warmth. He pumped his fingers at an agonizing fast pace as he leaned down over your back, his cock sliding across your lower back as his freehand grabbed your face roughly and pushed it down into the carpet. “Only way you’re gonna fuckin’ cum is around my cock. You fuckin’ hold it in girlie. Or else I won’t fuck you. How’s that sound? I’ll leave you beggin’ for more and I won’t give it to you.” He gruffly whispered against the shell of your ear.

“So fuck me how you think I should be fucked, Joel. If I’m such a slut, fuck me like one.” You smirked, trying to get a rise out of him. His words made your spine tingle and your body felt hot, so desperate for him to be inside you and rip you apart from the inside out. You slid one of your hands down your stomach and to your clit, giving it the attention Joel was slacking. He had you so close and if he’d gone just a few seconds longer, your clit wouldn’t be aching this badly. “Shove your cock inside me, I know you’ve wanted to since the first time you saw me. I found your dirty magazines, you filthy old man. Do you think of me when you look at them?” The playful tone in your voice was probably annoying the shit out of him considering you called him out for his magazine stash.

Joel pressed your cheek further into the carpet and when he saw you slide your fingers over your clit, he slipped his fingers out and smacked your hand away. “Did I fuckin’ tell you that you could touch yourself?” He was feeling a newfound sense of rage when you openly admitted to going through his things. “You fuckin’ dirty little whore. You went through my fuckin’ stuff?” He growled against your ear. “You know it’s rude to go through someone’s personal belongings, right girlie? You knew exactly what you were fuckin’ doin.’” He tsked under his breath as his free hand wrapped around his cock. “Such a bad girl. A bad, bad, bad girl.” He didn’t even bother to tease your entrance with the tip of his cock. He was absolutely ready to slice you right down the middle as he harshly jutted his hips forward, sinking fully into you. His nails dug into the flesh of your ass leaving crescents in their way as he snapped his hips forward over, and over again.

You shrieked as he buried his cock inside your soaking wet hole, not giving you any time to adjust. “You knew I was a bad girl and you knew I’d find them- fuck, Joel.” you cried out and reached back to put your hand on his as he dug his nails deeper in your skin. You arched your back further with every thrust Joel made until your chest was pressed into the carpet. The warmth from the fire and Joel’s body started to make you sweat slightly, your body starting to glimmer in the glow of the flames. “What’re you gonna do about it? Fuck the attitude out of me until I can’t walk or do anything? Show me your worst, Joel.” Your orgasm was building once more in the pit of your stomach and the thought of cumming before he tells you to actually scared you a tad, simply for the fact you weren’t sure how he’d react.

“What the fuck else did ya go through, huh?! Fuckin’ sneakin’ around my shit after I spared your fuckin’ life?!” He grunted deeply as he continued to slam his hips into you. He listened to the sound of his skin slapping harshly against yours, along with the crackling of the fire. His nails were digging so harshly into the soft flesh of your ass that he was drawing blood. Did he care? Not one fucking bit. “You just shut that whore ass mouth up and take whatever I fuckin’ give you.” Each harsh thrust had him driving his cock even deeper into you. You could feel the tip of his cock pressing against your cervix with each thrust. He wasn’t showing any mercy; especially after he found out that you betrayed his trust.

“N-nothing Joel I swear, it was just the ba-throom” the slapping of your skin interrupted you and made it difficult to focus. Suddenly you felt like maybe you shouldn’t have brought up the magazines, but you didn’t think he’d be too upset. “I’m sorry, Joel. I’m sorry” you kept repeating and begging for him to listen. It was all becoming too much for you, overwhelming you as he was thrusting so deep inside you, his nails digging even harder, the anger you could feel radiating off of him. You squeezed your walls around him, trying to keep yourself from cumming right then and there. It was right there, your stomach doing flips while your clit thumped with eagerness. “Please don’t be mad at me, I’ll be a good girl, I’m sorry.” you whined and squeezed your eyes shut, focusing on anything except how he said you have a whore mouth and how wet that made you. As he pumped in and out of you, a faint squelching sound filled the room and you whimpered his name louder.

“You’re a dirty fuckin’ liar, girlie. You’re sorry? Oh, I’m sure you fuckin’ are. It’s too late for you to be a good girl, baby. Too fuckin’ late for that.” He slipped out of you suddenly, giving you false hope that he was done but of course..that hope was immediately crushed when he grabbed your ankles and roughly flipped you over onto your back. A mixture of his pre-cum and your slick coated his cock and your inner thighs as he pressed your thighs into your chest. Slipping back into you was easy work with how soaked you already were and at this angle, you felt him reaching spots you felt were impossible to reach. You could feel him deep within your lower belly with each thrust. His hand grabbed your jaw roughly as he forced you to look up at him. His brows were furrowed in concentration and his eyes were as black as coal. “Fuckin’ look me in the goddamn eyes and tell me that you didn’t go snoopin’ anywhere else.” He gritted out between locked teeth as the pads of his fingers dug into your cheekbones.

Your eyes widened at his angry tone, his grip on your face making it hard to look away and lie. “I promise I didn’t Joel, I swear” you croaked out and screwed your eyes shut. Every piece of you was hoping he’d believe you and let it go. You grabbed his hand and tried to pry it off your face and onto your neck, trying to choke yourself with his hand. “Tell me when I can breathe, go ahead.” you insisted. The familiar white hot burning sensation was back in your core, making you feel like you could never get enough of this. He was fucking you so good you begged for him to never stop, keep going until he couldn’t anymore and leave his cock inside you to grow later when he’s ready to continue. You hooked your arm around the back of your knees to hold them closer and give him as much access to you as possible. Joel’s callused hands felt so good against you, his touch always so firm and rough on you.

“Give me one good fuckin’ reason as to why I should believe you? One fuckin’ reason.” He grunted as his thrusts became less coordinated, and more sloppy. He growled under his breath when you tried to remove his hand from your face but this was the one moment where he obliged and wrapped his hand around the base of your throat. “I’m gonna cum inside this fuckin’ pussy. You got that? I don’t care if you have to say ‘bout it either. I’m doin’ witn you whatever the fuck I please. Bet a slut like you loves to have your pussy coated in a dirty old man’s cum, huh girlie?” He watched the way your eyes rolled back as he snapped his hips forward. “Bein’ a good girl and grippin’ my cock so tightly. Fuckin gorgeous. Dumb little cockslut. I ain’t ever gonna fuckin’ let you go.”

“Please please please” you repeated as his grip on your throat sent your head spinning and your legs began to tremble, your mouth falling into an o shape as he drilled into you. “Joel let me cum with you, let me cover your big cock with my cum and show you how good I really am” your voice wobbled from the limited air being inhaled. Tears started to prick your eyes the closer and closer your orgasm was getting, your toes curling in the air. “This is your pussy, Joel. Do whatever you want to me, cum so deep inside me and watch it spill out before I suck your cock clean from our fluids mixing.” Your other hand went to your nipples and pinched them firmly, slightly twisting just to get you that much closer to cumming for Joel.

“That’s fuckin’ right girlie. You’re mine. Your pussy is mine. All of you fuckin’ belongs to me. You best not forget that either.” His tone was possessive as he claimed complete ownership over you. “Let those pretty ‘lil tears fall f’me. Weep for my fuckin’ cock. That’s it baby. Good fuckin girl.” He brought his free hand down to where your bodies were connected and rubbed your clit in harsh circles with his thumb as he gave a few more harsh thrusts. “Cum for me girlie. Coat my fuckin’ cock. Every last fuckin’ drop. Give it all to me.”

Your back arched off the floor and you squirm while your orgasm washes over you, guttural moans of Joel’s name and curse words flying from your lips. He was sending you over the top with rubbing your clit. You tried pushing his hand away but Joel being Joel didn’t budge.”Fuuuck Joel, that’s so good. You treat me like a fuckin’ princess. Now cum inside me and fill me up full.” Your breaths were deep as you tried to regain your senses, Joel still very much pumping in and out of you. His cock was twitching and you could tell he wasn’t going to last much longer. You bit your lower lip gently and looked at Joel with your beautiful eyes that he has a hard time saying no to, trying to get him to cum so deep inside you.

Joel let out a guttural almost animalistic sound that crescendo deep from within his throat. His hips stuttered as hot spurts of cum coated your fluttering walls. He bit down on your shoulder hard as he finished inside of you. The moment was over as quick as it came. Joel was already slipping out of you without another word. His cold demeanor washed over his post orgasm haze as he grabbed his boxers and yanked them over his hips. He grabbed the rest of his clothes in a fury. He wasn’t looking at you. It was as if you didn’t even exist in his close proximity anymore. He didn’t participate in any form of aftercare. He didn’t leave tender soft kisses along your face. Instead, he left you there on the carpet, fucked out with his cum dripping out of your spent cunt. Even with the fire's warmth, your body felt cold. His bedroom door slamming shut echoed through the cabin walls like a cymbal.

#joel miller smut #joel miller x reader #pedro pascal #joel miller #joel miller x you #the last of us #joel miller fanfiction #joel the last of us #joel miller x f!reader #not a survivalist girl #gi and mads #this is pure smut I am screaming #joel miller fic

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chaotic-mystery · 1 year ago

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Not A Survivalist Girl: Part 4

"Death Over Decaf"

Written by @chaotic-mystery & @tightjeansjavi

(Joel Miller x f!reader)

Summary: What happens when you mix a not so skilled girl and a grumpy old man trying to teach her how to fish and the importance of his coffee? Nothing too bad….right?

Warnings: Implied age gap, slow burn, mean!Joel, dark!Joel, he's a little awkward!Joel, just a grumpy old asshole! Joel, sunshine reader, angst in the beginning, PTSD, trauma, child loss, grumpy vibes, minor injuries (cuts scrapes) heavy on the sexual tension at the end, no smut, (+18) minors dni!

WC: 7.2k (It's for being so patient for almost a month shhh)

Let me know what you think! I love hearing your comments about it! Love you 🖤

Joel Miller relied on his everyday routine to remain consistent. Ever since his brother Tommy ever so nicely ditched him for the fireflies out west, Joel developed this routine to well..keep himself sane. (or as close as he could get to feeling sane) If there were any implications, any disturbances, it would set him off immediately. He always felt like he needed to have a sense of control, and having this routine pacified his internal anger. As long as he had the routine to fall back on, he would be a less grouchy version of himself. He started the morning off like the same as it had been for as long as he could remember. The sun had barely begun to peek through the sky when he pulled himself out of a deep, restless slumber. Joel was lucky if he got more than a few hours of sleep in before the nightmares would plague his mind. He reached over for the framed photo along his wooden dresser. His daughter Sarah had been the most important person in his life before the apocalypse. She was his everything and when he lost her...he doesn’t like to talk about his past and would much rather eat a bullet, than talk about losing his baby girl. Despite the day in, day out pain he felt, he made sure to kiss the photograph every morning when he would wake up, and every night before bed. His cracked lips ghosted over the photograph, eyes fluttering shut as he whispered her name under his breath. He gently set the frame back down before he grumbled at the fluffy pink blanket that he must have wrapped himself in sometime during the night. He felt like the soft fabric was mocking him. He held a personal disdain for the inanimate object as he pushed it to the very end of the bed. “Who the fuck even likes the color pink.” He gruffly muttered to himself. His voice was thick with sleep as he quickly made up his bed before he got dressed in his usual attire. The floorboards were squeaky beneath his heavy boots as he quietly left his bedroom. Hopefully you ended up being a heavier sleeper, because it was way too damn early for Joel to be dealing with you. The unfinished bathroom had a metal water basin as a makeshift sink. He always made sure to replace the water before the end of each day. He splashed his face with the ice cold liquid, hoping it would wake him up a little. A fresh cup of steaming coffee was the only thing on his mind now as he trudged down the hall and into the small kitchen. He filled the wood burning stove with a few logs before using a match to light them. He rubbed his calloused palms together as the cold morning chill bit through his skin. He was going to have to chop down a lot more firewood if he..and well, you were going to survive the impending approach of winter. He kept his bags of coffee in one of the wooden cabinets and he made sure he always had a back up bag for when he started to run low. He could not fathom having a morning without his coffee. He begrudgingly grabbed two mugs this time instead of one. He figured maybe you’d enjoy a cup as well. He was humming softly to himself as he grabbed the bag of coffee beans from the cabinet. The bag felt uncharacteristically light..just the other day he swore it was still pretty full. Maybe his mind was just playing tricks on him. Yeah, that was the only logical answer to–mother fucker. Joel’s blood was instantly ticking a degree higher in temperature when he opened the burlap sack to find that he was in fact all out of coffee. Well, there goes his perfectly planned routine. “Are you fuckin’ kiddin’ me? How the hell is it empty? Mother fucker.” He slammed the cabinet door shut with a heavy bang, nearly knocking the door off his hinges. He had completely forgotten the fact that he was not the only person inhabiting the small cabin space. You were just down the hall. Did he really give a flying fuck at that moment? No, not one bit.

The slam of the door made your eyes shoot open in a panic and you laid in the bed for a moment trying to understand what was happening. As you heard Joel cursing up a storm in the kitchen that shared the wall with your room, you rushed to get up and throw some clothes on to see what the hell he was coming undone about this time. There was always something bothering his grumpy ass but this floored you. You had never met someone rude enough to start throwing a fit at the ass crack of dawn while someone is sleeping.

“Joel cmon what are you shouting about? Do you have any idea what time it is?” You groaned as you leaned against the door frame to the kitchen, scratching your head as you waited for an answer.

Joel had thrown the empty burlap sack down in a fury. His routine was royally fucked and now the dormant rage, was becoming active once again. Simmering deep in his gut like bubbling, molten lava. “What am I shouting about, girlie?! Oh, i’ll fuckin’ tell ya what i’m shoutin’ about. I’m out of coffee. That’s what i’m shoutin’ about.” He snapped “Fuckin’ gonna have to go and get some more. Wasn’t in my plans for the day but I ain’t have much of a fuckin’ choice.” Joel knew his outburst was most definitely unnecessary. He knew it really didn’t boil down to the fact that he was out of coffee, it had to do with the fact that his routine was disturbed, and the situation was currently out of his control. He was gripping his hair tightly between his fingers, tugging on it by the roots as he leaned back against the countertop, muttering to himself.

Your head turned to his direction slowly and it felt like you didn’t blink for a good minute. Coffee? Coffee is what he was shouting about this entire time? A scoff left your lips and you shook your head in disbelief. “That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever seen you get upset about this far. So you don’t have coffee, is it that big of a deal to go and slam shit and yell over? I mean god damn, Joel.” You took a few steps into the kitchen and threw your hands up in the air, shrugging your shoulders in frustration. You weren’t the kindest when you were low on sleep and there wasn’t a chance in hell you’d pretend like you weren’t annoyed by all of this. Joel scoffed under his breath as he dropped his hands from his head. His eyes narrowed in on you when you didn’t even hide your annoyance at his outburst. “Oh, that’s so fuckin’ wonderful that you think that its the dumbest thing, girlie. I didn’t ask for your opinion, now did I? Didn’t think so. If you don’t want to hear me bitch about it, fuckin’ leave then.” He bent down and picked up the empty burlap sack with a huff. “I’m gonna have to go hit my supply stash a few miles from here to get some more.”

His cold words sent a shiver down your spine and you knew this was only the beginning of a very long day. Sure, you liked coffee just as much as the next person but Joel was taking it to a new level. You sighed and tucked your hair behind your ears and nodded slowly. “Okay, uh no I don’t think it’s that damn serious. Where’s this supply stash you have?” You jumped onto the counter next to him and swayed your legs side to side. Of course you’d go with him to get his stupid coffee if that meant he’d stop being a crabby old man and you could move on to having a good day. “We should probably go soon considering we’re going fishing today, remember we cooked the last bit of meat last night?” Joel had not been expecting you to go and make yourself at home that quickly. So when you had casually hopped up onto the countertop next to him, he quickly sidestepped away so you weren’t so close. “Yeah well..it’s pretty damn serious to me. I can’t live without my coffee, and no, I don’t give a shit if you think i’m bein’ dramatic.” He scrubbed his hand down across his weathered face and wiry beard when you brought up needing to go and find some food. “Like I said, it's a few miles from here. Who said anythin’ about a we? There is no we. You’re gonna stay here while I make the run. I don’t want to hear any complainin’ about it either girlie.”

“No cmon I can get ready so fast just give me ten minutes I really have to pee and change my clothes!” You were already halfway down the short hallway to your room as you were shouting at him to wait for you. It wasn’t the funnest thing you could think of tagging along for, but it was pretty outside and you were already awake, so why not tag along? Maybe you’ll find something useful besides fucking coffee.

Joel rolled his eyes when you yelled for him to wait for you. Well, he didn’t want to waste any daylight and he just had a feeling you were gonna end up slowing him down. He made a split second decision to grab his backpack and rifle from the hook along the wall before he slipped past the front door, and quietly padded down the stairs wordlessly.

You were tugging on your pair of boots in the living room when you saw his body getting smaller and smaller the further he walked towards the brush. That mother fucker. You groaned and flung the door open to the front porch and stepped outside, “You fucking asswipe! Be careful at least!” You shouted and crossed your arms across your chest.

Joel was already far enough away from the cabin that your shout was barely detectable, but he did catch onto you calling him an asswipe. His immediate response was to stick his middle finger high up in the air as he adjusted the strap of his backpack along his shoulder.

Of course he flipped you off, that’s exactly how you’d respond too, honestly. Since he left you all alone in his cabin this only meant one thing: snooping. The lightbulb went off in your head when the idea of going through his stuff came to you and a grin played on your lips before going inside making a direct line for his bedroom. You just wanted to know what his deal was, maybe learn some of his interests, some hobbies maybe. As the doorknob to his room twisted open, you found yourself looking around at everything. The photos, his clothes, his bed, his small book collection, everything. He had a story and you wanted to know what exactly it was but he still wasn’t warming up to the fact he had someone new living with him, whereas you were just fine and made yourself at home rather quickly. Your eyes fell on his bed and noticed your pink blanket you left for him right next to where it was evident he slept overnight. It was slightly balled up, like he held it to fall asleep or something.

You took a seat right where he laid in his bed, your feet barely touching the floor. His sheets were soft in your hands as you gripped them, trying to take in everything about him. His pajama shirt under the pillow tucked away from everyone and everything. You grab it and take in every detail about it. The poor logo was so worn and faded off of it you could hardly make out that it was a band t-shirt, some band he probably listened to in high school or college. Something came over you and you pressed it against your face, breathing in deeply the scent on it. He smelled like pine and something else, something warm that smelled like you were home. God damn you needed a hug so bad, this is embarrassing. Sniffing a guys shirt because you feel alone wasn't something you were proud of, but Joel really has a way of making you feel alone when he’s angry.

Folding the worn t-shirt and putting it back into place under his pillow, you decided to go through his bathroom. It was surprisingly clean when you popped your head in first, looking both ways before making your way inside fully. His shower was clean when you peaked behind the curtain, no hair left plastered to the walls. His cabinet drawers were tidy, nothing too out of the ordinary except for the last drawer. “Cmon you stupid bitch, open! I wanna know what you’re holdinggg” you begged and yanked at the drawer, finally getting it open. “Jackpot, motherfucker” you cheered and you were not prepared for what was inside. Playboy and Maxim magazines stacked top to bottom. You gasped as you grabbed one and looked inside, beautiful women draped over cars and beds, the ladies in sexy outfits or bare and in positions that you didn’t even think you could do. “Who the hell did he rob to get all of these? Barnes & Noble?” As you flipped the playboy magazine to the back you read Joel’s name on the address this was sent to years ago, with his house in Texas on the line to send it to. “You nasty old man, you.” You grinned and stifled a laugh as you put them away in the drawer and closed it.

It had only been an hour since Joel left and who knew how long he’d be gone, so you took it upon yourself to start cleaning the cabin. You restocked the woodpile inside for the fireplace, made Joel’s bed and put the blanket back where you set it the previous night, made your bed and put your clothes away in the wardrobe he put in there for you. You found his stash of knives in the drawer of the hall tree that held your coats and guns and everything else you could think of. You pulled out this long machete and poofed your hair a bit to look sexy and you pointed the machete right at the mirror above the fireplace, “ready to die, clicker?” You whispered trying to be tough but it was disrupted by your laughter. “I’m too funny, too bad Joel wouldn’t think that was a good joke.” Shoving the weapon back where it belonged, you stood up straight and furrowed your brows, arms out a little bit to seem bigger. “That’s not fuckin funny, GIRLIE. Shouldn’t mess with shit like that. GIRLIE, blah blah blah. I’m Joel and I’m a crybaby over coffee and I like being mean to girls who are just trying to live. I don’t wanna admit she’s cute because then that means I have a heart, blah blah blah.” You mocked in a gruff tone, pacing back and forth with your back facing the front door.

Joel had made it to the building just a few short miles from his cabin where he kept his emergency stack of supplies buried deep under the floorboards of the long abandoned gas station. He grabbed what was left of his stash of coffee, a few canned foods, a bag of rice, and a few casings of bullet cartridges. He was in a far better mood now that he was assured he wouldn’t run out of coffee for a while. The trek back to the cabin was a relatively quick one and he hoped to god that you hadn’t gotten yourself into any trouble while he was gone. The last thing he was expecting to find was you playing pretend in front of his fireplace. Were you..mocking him too? Joel was silent as he leaned against the open door jamb quietly. His arms were crossed over his chest and his jaw was clenched so tightly he could cut glass with it.

“I do not fuckin’ sound like that, girlie.” His tone was gruff and he had a displeased expression on his face as his eyes narrowed in on you with a certain sharpened edge of malice swirling through his darkened pupils. He had every intention to make you jump out of your skin from his unannounced arrival.

You yelped out of fear and turned to look at Joel who was clearly not with the amazing performance you just put on. “Oh lighten up, it was funny. You absolutely do sound like that by the way. It won’t kill you to laugh every now and then ya know.” You crossed your arms over your chest and stood exactly how he was to show how silly he looked.

Joel dropped his backpack to the floor with a heavy thud. The look on his face alone was a dead giveaway that he was not impressed with your theatrics in the slightest. “Oh yeah? Please enlighten me on the parts I am supposed to find humorous.” His tone was low as he took one menacing step forward, his boots heavy along the floorboards. He took another, and another till he was close enough that you could feel his warm breath fanning your cheeks. “Let’s see here, the part where you called me a crybaby for gettin’ upset over not havin’ coffee? No? Oh! The part where I don’t wanna admit that you’re cute because then that means I have a heart? C’mon, girlie. Use your words. What part of all of that was I ‘supposed to find funny?”

Your eyes met his and suddenly your mouth went dry, you forgot how to speak. It’s not that he intimidated you, he was just a gorgeous man even up close and personal. “You know you think I’m cute, just tell me. I nailed your voice though, you can’t deny that.” You pointed at him and cocked your head slightly, biting your bottom lip to hide a smile. This was all one big joke to you, especially the coffee tantrum but he wasn’t supposed to hear your impression of him, that was for entertainment later when you were fishing. How’s it your fault he came in when you didn’t rehearse much? “Can we just please get the ball rolling so we can go fishing? I'm excited to learn. Never been before and I have a goal of catching two.” You plopped down on the couch a few feet behind you and laid down, folding your ankles to rest on the armrest.

Joel was staring at you incredulously, as if you had suddenly grown five heads in the span of a few seconds. “Why in God’s green earth would ya think that to be true? You know what? Don’t tell me. I’d much rather not know.” He grumbled, shaking his head when you went ahead and made yourself at home on the couch. “Yeah I'm sure that eagerness will be long gone and dead when I tell ya that you’re gonna be the one putting the worm on the hook. You afraid to get a little down n’dirty along the river girlie?”

“No, not at all, not the worst place I’ve gotten dirty.” You snickered quietly to yourself at how incredibly filthy his question sounded. It did however make you wonder about gettin’ down n’dirty with him, his dirty hands wrapped around your throat- but now wasn’t the time for that. Fishing. You’re going to prove him wrong that you in fact don’t mind getting covered in nasty river water and mud. “Can I have a cup of coffee to go please? I’ll share if it’ll keep the tantrums at bay.”

Joel was fighting hard to not roll his eyes at your remark. He was starting to question why he didn’t just leave you to be an appetizer for the clickers. What the hell was he getting himself into taking in someone like you. He was starting to wonder if there were even any benefits to keeping you around. “I ain’t sharing a cup with you. You can have your own.” He bent down and grabbed his backpack from the floor and stalked off into the kitchen. “If we actually catch somethin’ we’ll be having the closest thing to a real fuckin’ meal. I got some rice and canned beans. Can make a good stew out of it that will last us weeks.”

The urge to turn your nose up to the sound of stew for weeks was strong, but you stayed quiet. You walked closely behind him and offered to make his coffee to go for him whenever he’s done but the glare he gave you was telling you to stop while you’re ahead. “Do you maybe have a thermos for it or how should I bring it?” You had no clue where anything was in the kitchen so you started looking in cupboards and shelves, coffee cups clanking against one another.

Joel scrubbed his hand across his face and wiry beard with a deep sigh as he set the sacks of coffee down on the counter. “Move. I’ll get it.” He grumbled as he came up close behind you, his hand subconsciously brushed across your side as he reached above you, grabbing two ceramic thermoses from the cupboard. You could feel his broad chest pressing against your back, and his warm breath fanning the tiny hairs along your neck causing goosebumps to rise along the skin. He got a whiff of your natural aroma..strawberries? Fucking strawberries?

You stood frozen in place as you watched his arm reach up above you, the sunlight glowing against his skin. Joel made your heart skip beats whenever he was short lipped with you, it was mean but you liked it. You were afraid to move and ruin the intimate moment that was so rare for him to partake in, your breathing even slowed. His fingers wrapped around the lid of the thermos in the most innocent way but wow did it have your head spinning. Joel was something you wanted and he was so close but still felt a million miles away, like you could somehow get him if you really tried.

Joel didn’t really appreciate the fact that the smell of strawberries was wafting through his nostrils, and clouding his senses for a brief moment. He cleared his throat as he set the thermos down and created a space between your bodies once more. He would not be indulging in any frivolous behavior. “Can you handle pourin’ this yourself?” He asked as he grabbed his own thermos and poured in the steaming pot of coffee that had been simmering on the stove. “It ain’t the best tastin’ coffee. Nothin’ like that sugary crap from Starbucks, but it gets the job done.”

“Lucky for you I was a Dunkin’ Donuts girl in my previous life so I’m not surprised by coffee tasting shitty sometimes.” You filled your container and took a small sip to get your body awake before you tucked the thermos under your arm. Joel of course was already getting the fishing rod out of the closet, he can never just slow down and enjoy the moment he’s in; it’s always go go go. Why did he move away the way he did? Did you smell weird to him? Maybe he thinks you’re too much considering you still use strawberry lotion that you somehow have managed to save and ration all these years.

Joel gave you a funny look when you said that you were more of a Dunkin’ Donuts girl. He made an obnoxiously loud slurping sound over the rim of his thermos as he took a sip. “So you’re tellin’ me you enjoyed the taste of sewage water? Cause that’s all I remember Dunkin’ ever tastin’ like. My dau—” He immediately paused. He could feel the color quickly draining from his face when he nearly uttered the word “daughter” to you. Stupid stupid stupid. He was angry at himself all over again as he yanked the fishing rod from the hook in the hall closet. He grabbed the tackle box with a huff. “C’mon. We’re wastin’ daylight.”

You furrowed your brows at him and turned your mouth downward to attempt to mimic his face. “Okay, ol’ man.” You muttered in a gravelly voice. You were determined to get him to at least smile at your impression of him, bonus points to you if you made him laugh. God only knows the last time his body felt a good laugh. Just imagining how long it’s truly been since he experienced a belly laugh was choking you up, your eyes stinging with tears. No one deserves to be alone, not even grumpy ass old men who are trying their best.

Joel was wordless as he started to head towards the front door. He was already feeling himself getting into his head again and it was a place that he didn’t like spending time in. Now with his dead daughter fresh on his mind.. “The river is just a short walk from the cabin. I use it as my main water source as well.” He didn’t glance in your direction as he swung the door open and headed down the steps, muttering under his breath.

“That’s pretty cool, I guess I never put two and two together on how you always have water.” You said a little out of breath as you tried catching up to him to grab the tackle box to carry it for him. Joel didn’t wait for you as he was easily ten feet ahead already, not shocking. The trees danced in the wind as the sunlight slowly started to pour over them, turning them orange. “I can see why you live out here, it’s peaceful, no one bothers you, it’s perfect.” Your eyes dart towards him just to see his initial reaction to you saying no one bothers him, already having a few ideas in mind of how he can be a smart ass about that.

“That’s one of the main reasons why I picked this exact spot to build a cabin. It’s got all the necessities for a loner like me to stay alive..” he trailed off as he sank down along the river's edge setting the fishing rod and tackle box alongside him. “Yeah well..I wouldn’t say it’s perfect. Perfect is like one of ‘em 5 star all inclusive resorts in the Bahamas or somethin.’ Where you can order all the the fuckin’ pina coladas that your heart desires. Although, I'm more of a Mai Tai man myself.” He wasn’t sure why he was telling you all of this. Perhaps it just felt a little nice to ramble on about pointless shit for a moment. “Alright, girlie. You said you wanted to’get down and dirty, yeah?” He was resting on one knee casually. “You know how to dig up worms? Or do ya need me to show ya?”

“I feel like you have a better technique at finding them so what’s the best way?” you asked and clapped your hands together, interlocking your fingers as you watch Joel fidget with stuff in the tackle box. This was your chance to show him you can listen and take notes, be useful to him and that you aren’t just a pretty face.

Joel was 100% hiding the fact that he already had a jar of worms in the tackle box on purpose. You humiliated him earlier with your theatrics so, it was only fair for him to get back at you for it. All's fair in love and war, right? “Well, you gotta get your face real close to the ground, and then to get the worms to come out of the dirt, you gotta chirp like a bird and then one by one, they’ll start poppin’ up out of the ground like damn groundhogs.”

It sounded a little funny when he said it, but you also didn’t want to question him and possibly offend him which would only make him more annoyed with you than he usually is. “Uuhh..okay?” your answer sounded more like a question and you got down on your knees in the wet soil, your palms on the ground as you got your face inches away from the dirt. “S-so I just..chirp?” you looked in his direction just to double check you heard him correctly.

Joel was not expecting you to be that gullible to just go and believe him that easily but damn, he was gonna continue to play along just to see if you would actually do it. “Yep. You just start chirpin’ like a bird and they start poppin’ up, you’ll see.” He had his arms crossed over his chest, his brow raised in your direction. “Well..go on. Get to chirpin’ girlie.”

You hesitated for a second before your lips damn near touched the soil and started to chirp quietly. Not wanting to look like a pussy ass bitch to him, you cleared your throat and started to chirp louder.

Joel did his best to keep a straight face the entire time but as soon as you started chirping louder and really getting into it, he stifled a chuckle. Quickly masking the sound by coughing into the sleeve of his jacket. “Oh my fuckin’ god. I didn’t actually think you were gonna do it!” He grasped your shoulder firmly in his warm calloused palm as he yanked you up from the ground. “Girlie, I didn’t think you were gonna be that gullible. Just wanted to play a little joke on ya. Actually, I already got worms in the tackle box right here.” He was doing his best to not deviously smirk, but he was doing a rotten job at hiding his amusement. “Oops?”

You sucked your cheeks in and looked away silently, refusing to give him any satisfaction in seeing your embarrassment that was smeared across your face. “I knew that.” You quickly wiped the piece of wet dirt off your lip and turned back to Joel who was pissing you off the more you looked at his jackass face.

Joel could tell that you were definitely pissed off with him now and okay, maybe he felt a little guilty for embarrassing you like that. “Hey, dontcha go and give me that look. It’s only fair that I got back at ya after you humiliated me earlier with your hilarious theatrics. Are ya really that upset with me now? C’mon. It ain’t that serious sweetheart.”

Sweetheart. That made your fucking heart jump in your chest. He was right though, you can’t dish it out and not be able to take it. “Yeah whatever, it’s fine. Can I jus’ get the worms please so we can finish and go home, I’m starving.” You’ve been out here for just over an hour but that’s not your fault you’re hungry, he didn’t let you eat before he was out the door about to leave your ass behind. You sat on the bigger rocks facing the river and grabbed the pole off the patch of grass, running your fingers along the cold metal and the small parts scattered around it.

“Well, don’t go gettin’ your hopes up on catchin’ somethin’ right away. It ain’t that easy.” He handed you the jar of worms. His fingers lightly brushed across the outside of your hand. “You ain’t gonna be squeamish about puttin’ a worm on the hook, are ya? They don’t have any pain receptors. At least..I don’t think they do.”

“No, I’ll be alright, I won’t scream too loud.” you smirked and pinched the worm between your thumb and index finger, piercing it with the hook firmly before grinning from ear to ear, showing him you got it. “See! I got it! Now, how do I cast this baby and get some dinner?” Eagerness was dripping from your words and it felt good to learn new things after being alone for so long. Never did you think you’d be out here with a hunk who is also a grumpy old man, learning how to fish with him but here you were.

“Wow, I was expectin’ you to be a tad squeamish. Maybe I underestimated you a little.” He still had his arms crossed over his chest as he looked at you. “So, you’re gonna wanna cast the line to the midpoint of the river. You don’t wanna cast it out too far, but you also wanna make sure it goes in deeper water. So bring the rod back behind your shoulder, and then you’re gonna bring it forward over your shoulder, with a bit of momentum to get it out there.” He was standing behind you now. His hands were at your waist, holding you steady. “Take it back nice and slow..” he whispered, lips nearly brushing against the shell of your ear.

At this point he knew what he was doing, this was the second time today he put his hands on you in some form. You couldn’t get distracted though, you had to get this fish to prove his ass wrong. Just as you were going to swing the pole forward into the water, you noticed a frog jumping around and it landed right on your boot. Motherfucking frogs. Your enemy. A blood-curdling scream erupted from your throat and you swear you blacked out. Your body went in any direction you could go but you didn’t even think about the slippery rocks in front of you. Suddenly your bodies were submerged in the icy water, your lungs taking in everything but air. Rocks were cutting up your pants and hands as you crawled out of the water, Joel doing his typical old man groans behind you, only this time curse words were mixed in.

Joel was not expecting you to let out a blood curdling scream that had his good, and bad ear ringing in his skull and when his body hit the shallow water, he immediately felt an intense pain shoot up his spine. His back was already bad enough as it is, but surely this would leave him bruised up. “WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT ALL ABOUT?!” He growled as he dragged himself out of the water. He was soaked from head to toe and his eyebrows were harshly furrowed in, deep lines etched into the weathered skin on his forehead. “YOU THAT FUCKIN’ SCARED OF FROGS OR SOMETHIN?!” He was fuming as he approached you along the river's edge.

“JOEL STOP IT I'M SORRY I DIDN’T MEAN TO DO THAT!” you exclaimed and stood up taking in as many deep breaths as you could. Blood was trickling down your knees as you came to your senses and realized the sharp rocks must have done that. “I-I’m sorry Joel…I’m sorry I didn’t mea-n to do that.” Your voice trembled as the winds blew against your sopping wet clothes, making them stick to your shivering body. You stopped caring at this point if he saw you cry or not, the warm tears were streaming down your face.

Joel was taking deep heavy breaths to calm his nerves. His hands were holding onto his knees as he hunched over and coughed up a bit of water. His back absolutely felt like it had been hit by a fuckin’ bus and he was shivering too. His features had hardened up until he saw the blood trickling down your knees through the gashes in your pants. Your free flowing tears caused his heart to clench in on itself. He didn’t want to be the cause for your tears. Not when you both could have been swept under the current moments ago. “Shit. Are you hurt?” He was already crouching down in front of you to assess how deep the cuts were. “I’m sorry for yellin’ at you like that. Didn’t know you were that scared of frogs, girlie.” His tone was much softer now. “C’mon. I’ve got a first aid kit back home. We gotta get out of these clothes. I’ll start us a fire so we can get warmed up.”

You reached your hands out for him to help you up, your watery eyes looking at him. Who knew he’d have the heart to apologize. His hands grabbed yours and he tugged you to your feet. “Don’t apologize, it’s my fault we’re shivering our asses off.” you half joked and bent down to grab all the supplies he’d taken out earlier. Joel started heading back but this time he slowed up for you since the slice on your knee had you limping in pain. His hand was dripping little water droplets as you walked and it crossed your mind what he’d do if you just reached out to hold it. You could say it’s to help you walk but let’s be honest, you just wanted to hold his hand.

“No it ain’t. We’re just lucky that the current didn’t sweep us under. We’d be fuckin’ toast then.” He glanced back at you momentarily.

Once you and Joel arrived back at the cabin, he was quick to grab the first aid kit from the bathroom along with a few towels. He was still shivering through his sopping wet clothes, but his natural instincts to take care of you while you were injured was kicking into full gear. He felt pretty shitty inside for yelling at you like that. Sure, he thought it was stupid that a frog caused that whole disaster, but as soon as he saw your tears, he knew he had taken it too far.

You peeled your clothes off your body and put them in a pile on the floor beside you until you were stripped to your bra and panties. The firewood you brought in earlier came in handy as you thanked yourself for being so smart to refill the pile inside. Tossing a few logs in at a time and striking a match before tossing it in, you stared at the flames licking the wood. It was warming your hands up rather quickly and everything seemed to be calming down. For now, anyway.

Joel wasn’t completely paying attention as he walked into the living room. The first thing he noticed was that you had managed to get the fire going already and when his eyes finally zoned in on you, he nearly dropped the first aid kit to the floor. He had not been expecting you to strip out of your clothes as quickly as you had. He couldn’t help himself from looking. It had been a long fucking time since he had last seen this much skin, let alone someone who was quite frankly, stunning. Not to mention, your tits were pretty much staring him right in the face. Plush, round, glistening under the warmth of the fires glow. They were practically spilling out of the bra you were wearing. He cleared his throat, bringing his hand behind his neck, rubbing it nervously. “Uh..give a man some warnin’ next time..yeah?”

Christ.

You giggled softly and crossed your arms in front of you for his sake. “Not really my style but I can do that if you want.” Should you have told him you were almost naked? Sure, 100%. Did you want to? Not at all. If Joel wasn’t going to start making moves and taking note of your flirtiness, you had to be the one to make the moves on him. “Just take your clothes off, I know you’re freezing in them. I’ll keep my hands to myself over here I swear.” You tossed your hands in the air where he could see them and patted the spot on the carpet next to you.

Joel was visibly hesitant as he observed you. His throat was running dry, and his brain was going all fuzzy. “Uh..let me uh—get us some whiskey. That’ll warm us up quickly.” He turned on his heel, leaving wet footprints along the floorboards from his soaked boots. He disappeared into the kitchen, quickly grabbing the bottle of whiskey and took a large swig. Focus Joel. Snap out of it. After one more swig for good luck, he closed the bottle and returned to the family room. He wasn’t sure why he felt so nervous in the first place. He didn’t think he was unattractive, but he didn’t like how your gaze on him appeared to sear through his layers of soaked clothes. He did not like that.

He started with his boots, unlacing them and kicked them off to the side. Before any layers of actual clothing would come off, he bent down over you, placing the bottle of whiskey into your palms. His biggest concern in his mind was how you would react to all the scars along his body. That was truly what he was most self conscious about. His coat dropped to the floor with a heavy thud. You could see that he was visibly shivering as he peeled his long sleeve shirt that was stuck to his body from the moisture. Inch by inch more of his tanned, scar ridden skin was revealed to you.

He struggled to make eye contact with you and instead looked off towards the fireplace, watching the way the flames licked up against the dry wood. He cleared his throat once more as he undid his belt and dropped it to the floor along with his soaked jeans. He wished now that he had taken one more swig from the bottle before doing all of this, but it was far too late to turn back now.

He finally eased himself to sit down alongside you, in nothing but his boxers.

You couldn’t help but watch as he undressed himself, finally showing off his beautiful body. The scars and the uneven tan on his arms didn’t mean one thing to you, he was fucking beautiful.

A puff of air escaped your mouth and your hand covered your face, so enamored by him. “Sorry not sorry if I’m being too forward here Joel, but you’re beautiful…holy shit.”

Joel was frozen where he sat alongside you. He could feel his cheeks, and the tips of his ears turning red by the second. No one had ever called him beautiful. Why would they? He thought himself to be a monster after all. If only you had known about the terrible things he had done, perhaps you wouldn’t think him to be beautiful. “You don’t mean that, girlie. I’m too old and rough to be beautiful.” His tone came out as a rough scoff as he was in disbelief. Was he being serious right now? Was he really going to sit there and tell you that you didn’t mean something you said? You scoffed as your mouth dropped a bit, “I always mean what I say, Joel. You are beautiful and nothing is too rough to me, big boy.” Let’s see how he likes those apples.

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