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sinner-as-saint · 4 years ago

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Wreck My Plans.

Mob!Bucky x Reader AU

Run-through: Taking time off work, you come back to your hometown for the holiday season, and you decide to go clubbing with a few friends. There, in the middle of the dark, loud room your eyes meet with a pair of familiar blue ones. Ones which you never thought you’d see again after so many years. There he was, your ex-boyfriend; Bucky Barnes.

Themes: mob!bucky, smut, fluff,

a/n: i missed my Sin Army. Happy evermore day. And to my Marvel fam, how we doin’ after those trailers?!

Time stopped.

One minute the music was deafening and the next, you couldn’t even hear it. All you could focus on was your current, erratic heartbeat as you stared into a pair of stormy, blue eyes. They looked darker and much more mesmerizing than you remember.

His name echoed in your head as a smile formed on your face. Bucky.

The smile on his face mimicked yours as he walked over to you at the bar, crossing the ocean of drunk people swaying to the music. Amongst the crowd he crossed, were some of your friends who ditched you just minutes ago to go have fun with a pair of dudes they met just upon entering the club.

You could join them, but rubbing your body against a stranger’s sweaty body was not what you intended to do tonight so you stayed back at the bar.

Good thing you did so, else you wouldn’t have noticed Bucky on the other side of the room.

You smiled a little brighter once he stood in front of you. Very, very well dressed in his dark suit.

“Is it really you?” he spoke, teasing you right away. Just like he used to.

You smiled and rolled your eyes at him, mainly to hide your nervousness as you realized how much deeper his voice had gotten. Or how much more attractive he was. He had always been a hottie, now even more so. Muscular and tall, even with the suit on you could tell he had a body to die for.

You and Bucky broke up right after graduating high school. You moved for uni while he stayed behind and joined his family business. It wasn’t a messy break up, just two 18-year-olds deciding to end a relationship and focus on their futures.

You finished college a few years later then moved again, for your dream job. And now, almost 7 years later, you were back in your hometown for the holidays for the first time in a long time.

“It is. How have you been, Buck?”

He smiled and took the seat right beside you. “Great.” he wasn’t lying. “You?”

You let out a little laugh. “Are we seriously gonna do the whole work and the weather thing?” you asked, and he laughed.

Oh how you had missed his laugh. It’s been years since you saw him, but everything about him was so familiar it hurt. The way his eyes closed when he smiled or laughed too hard. The blue in his eyes, the crinkles by them. The perfect shape of his nose which you always teased him for.

Everything about him reminded you of a simpler, happier time of your life.

He stared into your eyes for a few seconds, then smiled in nostalgia. “You’re just as pretty.”

You rolled your eyes again, casually ignoring the sparks which flew in between you two.

“Oh please. Enough about me, what about you? You’re quite the talk of the town I heard.” It was true, they were saying all sorts of things about him ever since you came home. No one knew where he lived, whether he was in town currently or no - he was, you just confirmed it a few minutes ago.

“Yeah? What have you heard so far?” he spoke with a smirk on. Words didn’t affect him anymore.

You raised an eyebrow. “So the rumors are true?”

He chuckled, and signaled the bartender to bring him a drink. You watched each of his actions cautiously. Everything about him screamed power. His stance, his movements, his poise. You had heard around that his dad’s business was doing poorly years ago and he turned to some shady stuff. And he dragged his son along. Something about mob, gangs and illegal stuff. You had trouble believing it at first, because you knew him. You knew Bucky and you couldn’t imagine someone as gentle as him being associated with this side of life.

But the smirk he gave you proved all those rumors and theories to be true.

“Oh,” you wondered why you didn’t feel the slightest bit afraid. “Well, it suits you.” You scanned him quickly and wondered where you got the confidence to do that.

You were right, it did suit him. The power, the mean yet magnetic demeanor, the way he could get absolutely everyone to stare at him in awe and fear - truly, it did suit him.

He smiled and took a sip of his drink, then placed his glass down. “You should be running for the hills, not complimenting me. Is that what your strict, conservative father taught you?” The last part was an inside joke so he couldn’t hide his smile.

You shook your head. Bucky and your dad never gelled well. Ever. “Leave dad out of this, he still hates you by the way.” your words made him chuckle at some memories. “So now what, you have gangs and guns and stuff?” you asked.

“Yeah I’m kind of the bad guy around here.”

You laughed. He stared at you in complete awe and he couldn’t help but smile. He felt it too, the pull or sparks or whatever it was that was preventing him from looking away. Like as though something had tied him to you and he couldn’t get away and he definitely didn’t want to.

“You’re here with someone?” he asked, looking around and hoping you’d say no because he hated the thought of you being here with another man. Which was weird because he was meeting you for the first time in years, yet he was already feeling so protective.

And that skin-tight coral dress you were wearing wasn’t helping either.

“With some girl friends,” you replied and he quietly let out a sigh of relief, “But it seems they’re nowhere to be found.” You looked around and couldn’t see them. They were wild party animals anyways.

Bucky smiled and got up from his seat, extending his arm out for you to take. “Come on then, let’s get out of here.”

You took the last sip of your wine and took his hand. You let him guide you to the back of the club. “You know the owners?” you asked, seeing he was so comfortable in the space. He chuckled.

“I am the owner, doll.” he answered in that cocky, velvety voice of his. And that nickname, that damn nickname brought back so many memories; they came flooding back in like it was no one’s business.

The first time he kissed you. Prom. That road trip you took together. All the ones you planned but couldn’t take. All the times you snuck out of the house to hang out at his place. The one time you got caught and how your dad almost lost his shit completely. The time you had your biggest fight and didn’t talk for two whole days. How he apologized first for that one.

You remembered everything.

He held the door open for you as you slid into the passenger seat of his slick, black car. He was quiet when he got into the driver’s seat. But the silence was comfortable, like the kind you have around your closest friends and family; where you’re just happy with sharing space and air, just knowing the other is here and not having the need to fill the silence with useless talks. The kind of silence which spoke louder than words ever could. Comforting, and warm.

He pulled into the entrance of a private property and your eyes widened for a brief moment. “You live here? This is your home?” you asked, a little surprised at the grandeur of the mansion in front of you, which grew bigger and bigger as you approached it.

“One of my houses, yes.” he replied, cocky as always.

You playfully scoffed. “Showoff.” you muttered, loud enough for him to hear and laugh at.

He got out of the car and walked around to open the door for you. You rolled your eyes at his antics, “You don’t have to do all that, you know?” you teased.

He chuckled and casually reached down to hold your hand in his as he guided you over to the front door. It was chilly out, so he walked a little faster. “Oh come on, I know I’m the bad guy now but I'm chivalrous enough to treat my ex-girlfriend right.” he played along, knowing exactly which word would get a reaction out of you.

“Ouch.” you pretended to be hurt. He laughed as he ushered you into his home.

The first thing you noticed were the guards. Then the extravagant foyer which led to the equally extravagant living room. The color theme, the lovely smell of the house, there was something about it which was so familiar, yet you couldn’t place a finger on it.

“You have a beautiful home, Buck.” you looked around and noticed that the guards had left.

He smiled and let go of your hand, letting you walk around his personal space for a bit. He could get used to this, the thought popped into his head out of nowhere. He could get used to seeing you in his home.

“Come on up, you’ll love the library.” he spoke and extended his arm out again. You took his hand and he led you up the large, fancy wooden stairs.

He was right. You did immediately fall in love with his library/study room. It was everything one dreams of. Spacious, yet cosy. Modern, but with a vintage twist. The right amount of light, but not too much. It was beautiful.

You walked a few steps further and started noticing the little things; like the mini bar, the unused typewriter on the desk, the scattered papers next to it, the chandelier which made the room look magical.

“This is beautiful.” you commented as you lazily skimmed through the books on the shelves. You heard him move around glasses in the background.

“Thank you.” he paused, pouring himself a drink. “You want a drink?”

You turned to face him for a brief moment. He had taken off his coat, leaving him in his very expensive looking black shirt. “Sure.” you answered, then you turned back around to check out the books and you could feel him staring at your back. You smirked as not so holy thoughts filled your head.

How would tonight end? You wondered.

You walked over to his desk and plopped down on his large seat. He walked over as well, placing your glass down and leaning against the edge of the table, staring down at you with a smirk on and a look in his eyes which you couldn’t quite understand.

“What?” you laughed as you took a sip of the liquor. It was smooth, and sweet and left an amazing aftertaste in your mouth as it slid down your throat, burning just a little. It tasted expensive.

“Nothing.” He replied, softly as he eyed you carefully. “I just can’t believe you’re here, after all this time.”

You smiled and looked up at him. “Things changed, haven’t they? I mean, the Bucky I knew hated whiskey and brandy. He liked cheap beers and vodka.” you pointed out.

Bucky smiled and rolled his eyes, shoving a hand in his pocket out of habit. Suddenly he looked much younger and very boyish. “He changed, Y/N.”

This was the first time he used your name tonight and you felt funny inside. The good kind of funny.

“Mhmm.” you agreed. “He got meaner.” you teased and stood up from the seat, and looked past him. Right by the couches, was a small coffee table upon which something shiny caught your attention. And being the curious being you are, you walked right over without a second thought.

“You think?” he sounded playful as he watched you walk over to the coffee table where his guns were kept. He doesn’t usually leave them out in the open like this but he was cleaning them earlier so he left them there.

Bucky watched how you picked one up and examined it.

“Yeah,” you spoke up without taking your eyes off the hand gun. “He got dangerous.” You weirdly liked how it felt in your hands. A little heavier than you thought it would be.

He was surprised at how comfortable you were with this side of him. Another woman would turn the other way and would run. But not you. “Be careful with that, doll.” he warned you softly. “They’re all loaded.”

You smirked as you placed the gun down and picked up another. And you sensed him tensing up where he stood.

“Don’t touch that one.” he said calmly. You frowned.

“Why not?” you asked.

He placed his glass down and walked over to you. “I’ve done bad things with that one. I’ve hurt bad people.”

You knew your way around a gun. Your father used to hunt as a hobby so you knew the gun was locked. But just for the hell of it, you aimed it at him and smirked. “Yeah? I think I like this new Bucky a lot better.”

He smirked, loving the fact that the city didn’t diminish your spunk. He realized then that you were still the same girl he fell for in highschool. “Careful.” he warned again, giving you a soft smile. Seeing you like this made him want to do bad things to you. He felt hot as he watched you aim a gun at him. He didn’t know why.

“Scared?” you teased, loving the reaction you got out of him. The buzz of the wine earlier and the whiskey just now amplified your confidence and you loved it.

Oh fuck you looked hot. It made it hard for him to focus on anything else. “Put it down, Y/N.” he kept his devilishly handsome smirk on. You held your ground and it made him groan and roll his eyes. He approached you and you giggled. He carefully took the gun from you and placed it back down on the table, then without another word said, he circled his arm around you and pulled you closer. “Good girls don’t play with those. You used to be so obedient, what happened?” he teased.

You smirked, finding his body heat really comforting. “I’ve changed.” you purposely repeated his own words, then added, “Maybe I’m not such a good girl anymore.” you purred. He clenched his jaw and exhaled loudly.

“Don’t tease me baby girl. I’m not as nice as I used to be.” his words made you all hot and bothered.

You smirked. “Prove it.”

And just like that, with one look of his, you were under his spell. He smirked and leaned in, purposely avoiding your lips as he gently kissed his way along your jaw. You shivered when his lips touched your neck; leaving soft kisses along the side of your throat while his hand wrapped tighter around your waist.

He made you whimper and whine, you could feel him smirk against your skin. He pulled away after a while, and held your chin in between his forefinger and his thumb, and he looked into your eyes with an intensity which made your body tingle. His thumb soon moved up to touch your soft lips gently. He traced the shape of your mouth and spoke, “I’ve missed you.” he looked down at you softly.

Your lips parted as he trailed his fingers down your chin, down your neck before he gently wrapped his fingers around your throat, applying just a bit of pressure there. You smirked as you looked up at him. “Not so sassy now, are we?” he sounded cocky and in control, just how you liked him.

And suddenly all those years which had gone by didn’t mean a thing. You picked up right where you left off. The spark was still there.

“Buck… please,” you whined under your breath. Oh how he had missed this…

He chuckled. “Come here, baby girl.” he walked a few steps backwards and plopped down on the couch, pulling you onto his lap where you fit perfectly. A soft, unexpected moan left your lips as he slipped his hand under your dress and inched higher and higher up your leg, and caressed your inner thigh as he went.

He smirked when you moaned and kept going. He leaned in to kiss your jaw and down your neck; his stubble brushing against your skin gently. His lips warm and soft as they peppered your skin with kisses, making you instinctively tilt your neck to give him easier access. He chuckled when you visibly trembled as his knuckles brushed against the front of the flimsy thong you were wearing. He couldn’t wait to tear it off your body.

His need to have you grew with each passing moment. Hot, fiery, burning desire. Bucky slipped his hand past your underwear and touched your wet folds, his two fingers circling around your clit, “You’re dripping, doll.” He chuckled as you moaned when he slowly pushed a finger past your entrance. Then another and started gently pumping them in and out of you.

Your body throbbed. You whined, throwing your head back and letting him do whatever he wanted with your body.

Bucky looked up at you in pure adoration as he placed his thumb on your throbbing clit and brushed it occasionally while he finger-fucked you; your wetness dripping and smearing all over his hand; his fingers touched you in all the right places; curling just right and massaging your walls perfectly. His other hand gently wrapped around your neck; not squeezing yet but just holding you firmly.

You got a little louder as he sped up; his fingers slipping in and out of you with ease and eliciting sounds which turned you on even more. Seeing you were whining and whimpering already, Bucky moved his hand from your throat and pushed two fingers into your mouth; slowly pumped those two as well; an obscene attempt to keep you quiet.

Your mouth immediately wrapped around his fingers. And he swore under his breath again at the sight of you so salacious and open; his fingers buried in your wet core, slipping in and out of you rapidly while his other two fingers were buried into your warm mouth. The sounds you made alone were enough to make his pants feel tighter; and make him want to devour you even more. You moaned when he sped up again; his fingers stroking your walls perfectly and increasing the sweet, almost agonizing pressure forming in between your hips. You felt a rush and a warmth washing over you; intensified by his tight grip at your throat.

“Are you gonna cum for me, doll?” he asked, leaning in to just bite your lip; not kissing you properly but just biting down and nibbling on your lower lip and making you go crazy. You whined in pleasure and nodded. He sped up again; and you rolled your hips against his hand in a haze – chasing your orgasm; moaning and whimpering. “Cum for me, come on, babygirl.” He encouraged you and tightened his grip around your throat just a little bit more.

You let the familiar waves of pleasure wash over you as you came all over his fingers; crying out loud in pleasure. Gushing out all over his hand as he kept pumping them in and out of you, getting everything he could out of you. Once satisfied, he removed his hand from your underwear and pulled his hand back from your throat and wrapped both his arms around you and pulled you closer to him, causing your sensitive core to brush against his crotch. And you could feel his erection.

“You have no idea how bad I’ve missed you, baby girl.” He whispered against your parted lips. “I searched for you, but I couldn’t find a way to get to you.”

“Buck…” your hands reached up to cup his face and you pulled away just a little to look down at him. “I’m here.” you whispered, breathless still.

He wasted no time in pressing his lips to yours. He finally pressed his lips to yours and kissed you like there’s no tomorrow; there was nothing gentle or innocent about the kiss, just hunger and passion and pure craving. His soft lips moved perfectly against yours through the messy kiss. He moaned through the kiss when you slid your hands into his hair and tugged on it gently. His hands rested on the curve of your ass; holding you close to him as he gently pulled away from the kiss and stared into your eyes.

He gripped your waist and pressed your cloth core onto his, making you grind against him; causing you to feel his hard on through his pants. You almost moaned at how big and firm he felt. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head, and your body shuddered as a wave of pleasure washed over you while you shamelessly rocked your hips ever so gently against his clothed hard on. He smirked at your involuntary actions.

“Fuck… I need to have you. Now.” he growled before pushing you down on the couch and hovering on top of you. He purposely pressed his crotch down in between your parted legs, making you moan at how fucking big he felt. “You feel that?” he breathed into your ear and made you shiver at how deep his voice sounded. You could almost feel the lust in his voice. “You did that, babygirl.” He pulled away from your face a little to look at you, smirking.

He kissed his way down your body, sliding your dress down your body while at it. You felt his mouth in between your thighs. Your back arched off the surface of the couch as his tongue slowly circled your throbbing clit and licked down, parting your wet folds with ease.

Your taste drove him wild, so did your soft whimpers. Your hand flew to his hair and you tugged on it gently as he flicked his tongue over your clit over and over again. His stubble rubbed against your sensitive skin incessantly, and the friction burned a little but it was the kind of pain you kept wanting more of.

His deep blue eyes watched you in awe and how you lost control under his touch; legs shaking as he teased your entrance with the tip of his tongue. His hands wrapped around your thighs, securing you in his grip as he pushed his face further into you, making you cry out loud. You came violently all over Bucky’s tongue, body shuddering and shaking while you moaned his name out loud. It gave him a pleasant rush when he heard your strained voice moan out his name.

He kissed your inner thighs, licking you clean before kissing his way up your body and finding your lips again. He kissed you with ardor; eager to just be inside you already and make you squirm and shake under him, but he also wanted to cherish each moment and worship your body. You felt his tongue stroke the top of your mouth, and his hands touched you wherever he could; your breasts, your waist – leaving trails of goosebumps wherever his fingers touched your skin.

He pulled away for a bit and grabbed both your wrists and pinned them down on the couch above your head. “Keep your hands there for me, baby girl.” He mumbled under his breath and lifted his hips to align his erected cock to your entrance. You instinctively spread your legs apart to give him more room. His hand reached down and he pumped his cock, rubbing it all over your dripping core in the process. You squirmed and moaned when he did so; the tip of his cock rubbing up and down your wet lips, parting them as he circled your clit gently. You shuddered under him; whining in need. Your body begging him to just take you already.

“Look at me.” He almost moaned as he whispered a little breathlessly, looking intensely into your eyes. The dimmed lights made his eyes look darker than usual, and his face looked dangerously handsome. His voice was deep – which caused the butterflies in your stomach to go crazy. With a slow, steady push, he inserted his length into you. You shuddered as you felt all of him. You heard his ragged breaths as he removed himself out and pushed himself back into you again.

You moaned out loud, unable to hold back the sound which escaped your lips. “Fuck…” was all you were able to mutter under your breath as he pulled out of you completely, then pushed back into you again; filling you up entirely.

He sped up just a little, rocking his hips against yours and his hand reached up to wrap around your neck gently. He stared into your eyes, speeding up into you again. He leaned in to kiss your open mouth, shamelessly shoving his tongue past your parted lips and stroking the inside of your mouth. You could only nod senselessly, overwhelmed by how good he felt deep inside you. His lips left your mouth and kissed down your face. You let out a moan as he found your sweet spot, and felt him smirk against your skin. You moaned again as he bit and licked the skin beneath your jaw, all while slamming into you relentlessly; stretching you out and pounding into you like his life depended on it.

You could no longer keep your hands off him so you reached out and held onto his shoulders; your nails digging into his skin as you felt a pressure forming around your lower region. Bucky quickened his pace and pounded into you harder than before; the sounds of your skin slapping one another resonated around the room.

The dim light made his eyes look even more piercing than usual. Your legs trembled as you wrapped them around his waist. The new position was much more pleasurable for the two of you; the tip of his cock touched your most sensitive spots and your back arched off the couch – your chest pressing against his partially unbuttoned shirt; his body heat radiating through the fabric.

You moaned out loud and he very gently tightened his grip around your throat. His voice cracked as he whimpered in your ear. He somehow sounded needy but in control at the same time, and it drove you crazy. You felt your walls clench around him, and tighten around his thick member; making him swear out loud.

“Cum for me, babygirl. Come on.” he panted against your cheek, kissing the side of your face and gripping your jaw with his hand. He didn’t slow down as you felt your orgasm wash over you, he kept pounding into you as your eyes rolled back and you moaned out his name as you came – hard.

You whimpered at how he kept slamming into you even after you came, and your face burned as you felt the knot forming again right at your core. Bucky fucked you relentlessly; not even stopping for a second. He panted and groaned at how good you felt and shamelessly told you about it; whispering against your skin about how perfect you felt around him – wet and warm all for him. You moaned as you felt your second release approaching while the first was still fading. Your legs were numb, and your body moved along with his like a rag doll; yet, you wanted more of what he had to give. You craved him.

A rush coursed through your veins as you felt your mind clouding with lust again. His large frame hovering above you as he tightened his grip around your throat just a little more. “Cum for me again, come on.” He growled, his lips dangerously close to yours as you whined and whimpered under him.

A series of cuss words left your lips as you came for the second time in a row, walls tightening around his length. He bit down on your lip as you lifted your hips to meet his thrust; chasing your release. Your body trembled under him as you came again; gushing out around his cock while he still pounded relentlessly into you before slowing down again.

He kissed you again, while you tried to steady your breathing and calm your racing heart. He chuckled when he pulled away to look at how disheveled and messy you were all because of him. His hand left his throat and his thumb traced your lips again, he was mesmerized by how much of a whimpering, tear-stained mess you were.

“It’s okay doll, I’m right here.”

---

You woke up in his bed.

And the flashbacks of the time spent there hit you immediately.

You felt his arms around you as you peaked from under the blanket to try and reorient yourself. The room was brighter. You checked the time and it was around ten in the morning.

Well, there goes that family breakfast you promised your parents.

You felt Bucky stir in his sleep behind you. He peeled one eye open and smiled at the sight of you still in his bed.

“Morning baby girl,” he said in a deep, groggy morning voice which made your heart flip.

“I have plans with my family, you know? You’re just, shamelessly wrecking them.” You teased and watched how his smirk grew. His arm tightened around your body, under the covers. His touch was warm and gentle as he tugged you closer to his equally warm body.

Your bare chest pressed against his and you looked up and stared into his blue eyes. They were so dreamy you still couldn’t believe they were real.

“Oh please. Admit it, you like it better here with me rather than being confined in that old man’s house.” He rolled his eyes as he mentioned your dad.

You giggled. Him and your dad always hated each other.

“Imagine what he’d say once he finds out I’ve been hanging out with the bad guy. Again.” You played along.

Bucky laughed and leaned in to kiss your forehead. “I’ll deal with him. I’d do anything for you.” he whispered softly, the last part even more so.

Your heart did that thing where it felt like it was bursting into a millions little pieces in the best ways. The butterflies in your stomach went wild at the sound of his morning voice. You looked up at him and then leaned in to kiss his neck softly.

“I missed you, you know?”

“Hmm, I know.”

You giggled and hugged him tighter. “What now?” you asked, thinking about what would happen two weeks from now, when you’d have to get back to the city.

His chest rose and fell as he took a deep breath. “I was planning on expanding my… business to another city. How is it over there?” he asked, a smirk forming on his face as he waited for your reaction.

Your eyes widened as you quickly pulled away and sat up on his bed with a shocked look on your face. “You’re moving?”

He smiled at you. “I’ll go wherever you go at this point. I just got you back, I'm not giving up on us this time.”

“Are you sure about this? Our lives… they’re so different.” you looked down at your lap as you spoke. “Will we make it?”

He sat up and leaned against the headboard, pulling you onto his lap, caging you in his arms. “Oh we will.” Then he looked past you for a brief moment, out the floor-to-ceiling windows. He noticed the snow falling delicately. It was truly beautiful, but nothing matched how pretty you looked - messy hair, swollen lips, love bites all over your skin.

He leaned in to kiss you, then whispered against your lips. “We will make it doll, don’t you worry. Just trust me.”

a/n: ily.

#bucky barnes #mob!bucky #mob!bucky x reader #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes x reader #winter soldier #bucky barnes au #marvel #Sebastian Stan

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awrestlinggirlwholoves80sbands · 3 years ago

Text

Laid out cold, now we're both alone (part 2)

A/N: Hello, this fic is very important to me because I tried my best to give justice to such a cool idea and I hope I did a good job. Plus I don't do multichapter ofter, so this was a challenge.

I wanna thank the lovely @livdonna for proofreading my work, you're literally the best <3.

P.S. If you want to get tagged in the next chapters, let me know.

Summary: Nikki visits Mick to give him a very important task.

Warnings: Major Character Death,Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Drug Use, Angst, Overdose.

Pairing: Nikki Sixx x Tommy Lee

Chapter 1

Taglist: @slashscowboyboots @witchytombstonesmile @arnold-layne @emometalhead @i-dont-like-rice @nikki-sexx @smokeandmirrorz

Mick was supposed to not give a shit about Nikki. He and the stupid drummer had tormented him and his wife for months on ends, making the whole tour a living hell and he didn’t need to have even more things to worry about. So what if his bassist decided to get addicted to heroin? He was a fucking dumbass but it wasn’t his problem. He would end up killing himself and it wasn’t like Mick could have done something, not when his whole body was torturing him.

The only problem was that he cared, deep down. He cared about the fucker and hearing the news that he was gone forever hit him. He lost one of his friends and the band all together in a day, what would have happened? He hated to admit he was scared about the future, it was hard to imagine Motley Crue without Nikki.

He sighed, turning off yet another discussion about his death. They didn’t call him yet but something was telling him that they had to release a statement soon. Doc was probably freaking out somewhere crying for all his millions of dollars lost.

“Fucking Nikki, you had to die at the worst moment, didn’t you?”

“Yeah… sorry about that, man” A voice incredibly similar to Nikki said, making Mick jump up.

Nikki didn’t feel anything, one moment they were in the ambulance and the other they were on the beach. He was confused for a moment before he remembered that Mick had a beach house, and stared at it for a bit. He didn’t know much about the guitarist, maybe almost nothing but he respected him so much. He was one of the strongest dudes he had ever met.

The weirdest thing about all of this was probably how he was only able to feel certain things, no cravings or sand under his feet as he was walking, yet he would still feel guilt, fear, love, worry… it didn’t make sense but he wasn’t in the mood to question the universe’s rules.

People can’t see you until you decide to show yourself. You have to remember or otherwise they can’t hear or see you.

The voice still freaked him out, but at the same time he was grateful for it to be there… it made him feel less alone, which was great considering how he felt lonely for his entire life.

“You’re not alone Nikki, I’ll always be there with you, through highs and lows”

“God it sounds like a marriage vow, T-Bone”

“Well if I could I’d marry now…”

He shook his head, trying to get the memory out. It wasn’t the time to be sentimental and risk fucking everything up, so he walked ( more like flew) through the front door and found Mick sitting on the couch.

“Fucking Nikki, you had to die at the worst moment, didn’t you?”

“Yeah… sorry about that, man”. The bassist hoped that he was heard, otherwise it would have been pretty embarrassing.

Mick visibly jumped at hearing Nikki’s voice and quickly turned around to look at him. From his widened eyes and confused expression, he knew he probably looked fucking transparent.

“Okay first of all why the hell are you here talking to me if you’re dead? Then why the fuck can I see myself through you ?”

The black haired man just realized that he had no idea how to explain everything and be believed, he just went along with whatever the voice in his head was saying, but now it was different. He fumbled with his hand and realized he couldn’t feel them, while he tried to come up with the best way to explain to his friend how he was a ghost and why he was there.

“I died… I have no idea how I came back but I have unfinished business and I need to talk to you!”

The guitarist looked at him up and down, clearly skeptical. However, there wasn’t much arguing… Nikki’s ghost was literally standing in front of him.

“Okay I have no idea if this is a dream, I’m dead or in a coma, or simply I drank too much but now I’ll grab some vodka and you’ll spill your little secrets as you like”.

Nikki smiled a bit… He honestly felt normal for the first time since he was brought back. Having Mick joking was so familiar, usually Tommy was the aim of his jokes and they all laughed because they were all so unexpected…

Tommy. Thinking about him still hurt, again he wondered if he was okay and how much he missed him… but it wasn’t his time now. He had other things to talk about as Mick came back into the living room with his glass.

“Mick… you gotta promise me that you won’t let Motley Crue die, that you will fight to keep the band’s legacy.”

The older man looked at him surprised, rolling his eyes.

“Well that’s a bit hard when our bassist and songwriter died!”

Rage and resentment were heavy in his voice but there was more : fear and sadness. Nikki felt guilty and he fucking hated it, it was so unlike him but he couldn’t help it… Mick cared about the band as much as he did. He always said the band was his life, before heroin came into the picture, but it was also Mick’s and he probably destroyed everything.

“You will find another one, another bassist who is also a songwriter…” The words felt so foreign coming from his mouth. They even hurt a bit but they were necessary.

“I know you care about this band as much as I do, Mick. I know how much you’ve worked your ass off in shitty bands, trying to find the one that was going to break… I might be dead but Crue can’t have the same fate”.

Mick scoffed, taking a long sip of his vodka.

“It’s not easy, it’s not like we can find the perfect match like we did. Plus, everyone will probably hate him for replacing you!”

The frustration was almost tangible, but there was something else… Mick was scared, he knew everything was about to fade away because of Nikki’s actions, he was already looking at the boat sinking. Nikki started to panic because his band had to live, even in his death! It was pointless and selfish but that was the only thing people could remind him of.

“If you give up, then Vince and Tommy will do the same! I know that you think no one will take you, but the truth is they will. Crue is what it is because of our vision, you are part of it and I’m asking you to keep it going. Think of this as my dying man’s wish… even if I’m already dead”

The older man’s grip on his glass got tighter, his eyes lost in thought as he was pondering Nikki’s words. It was hard to take in, hell that was an understatement, it was fucking insane and probably wouldn’t work but the bassist needed to have this false hope.

“It’s so fucking weird, you know? To realize you’re fucking dead yet here talking to me.”

He was deflecting, Nikki knew it, but didn’t want to push it too far. He learned to know Mick, he kept his promises and he was a hard worker and with a good dose of luck and jokes, you got him to your side.

“Yeah, do you remember how I said you weren’t going to make it in that interview? Well, karma hits like a bitch!”

“Mick might not make it , he drinks a little too much and it looks rough” Mick quoted, trying to imitate Nikki’s voice.

“Yeah and then you said something like I heard what you said and you’re dead, fuck I guess you were right” He laughed but Mick didn’t.

Oh c’mon so what if he was joking about his death? It’s not like anyone really cared about him. They just saw him as a burden, which he was. Not his mom, nor his band or his Tommy would have really missed him… they would eventually move on.

“You’re a fucking idiot.” He said annoyed but his lips formed a small smile.

“I know, I know. Mick… please promise me that. If Crue is going to end, then my whole life didn’t mean anything! Ple…” He stopped himself, he was so fucking close to begging but he couldn’t. Nikki Sixx didn’t fucking beg, not in life or death.

“I’m thinking about it!”

He really meant the first part. He spent all his teenage and adult years creating the band of his dreams and making sure they conquered the world. This band was his escape; his attempt at redemption after his shitty childhood. Nobody loved Frank Feranna but he didn’t care, he would become Nikki Sixx and be super fucking famous!

He didn’t need anyone’s love, except that he did.

“ I love you, Nikki.”

“ No you don’t, nobody does, T-Bone”

“Well I fucking do. You gotta pass on my dead body before you’ll hear me not saying it over and over”

His heart might have stopped, but he still felt the big wave of nostalgia hitting him. He couldn’t do it, he would have never been ready to see him again.

“Okay, I will. But listen to me, it won’t be easy and I’m an old man with a fucked up back, so don’t send demons against me if I fail!” The little spark of determination in his eyes relaxed Nikki, he was on board.

“I fucking knew you were the best, Mars! If I wasn’t dead I’d probably tattoo your face on me as a thank you!”

“Oh gross, never say that again!” He pretended to be disgusted but his eyes betrayed him, the small softness in them told Nikki he felt touched.

“Who knows, maybe in hell they have tattoos for the ghosts. God we used to hate each other and now we are two peas in a pod.”

“I still hate you.”

“Ugh, you crushed my heart Mick”

The guitarist flipped him off, rolling his eyes. Nikki desperately wanted to keep talking, if he did then he could have pretended nothing changed, right? He didn’t have to face Vince and Tommy and go through the light… everything would have stayed the same or he could fool himself that it would.

I think it’s time to go to the next person.

The voice was demanding yet still calm. Nikki knew that he couldn’t stay forever, they had to prevent spirits from just lingering into the real world like that, it made him a bit angry but he understood it. It wasn’t like he could have done much anyway…He was just a shell of what he used to be.

“I gotta go Mick…” He wanted to punch himself because he sounded so fucking pathetic, but the other man gave him a compassionate smile.

What he fuck are you, a little small puppy? Oh look Frankie is scared to leave his illusion of a family.

Mick walked him to the other without saying anything, but before turning the handle, which was pointless because Nikki could have just passed through the door, he broke the silence.

“Try to give us some signs, okay? Show us that you’re there… but don’t you fucking dare spill my vodka or I’ll make you two times dead!”

“Oh that’s exactly what I’ll do, thanks for the suggestion!”

He stepped outside and looked at Mick one last time.

“You promised, alien. You gotta do it!”

“Yeah yeah, you better repay me when I come to join you there…” And with one last look, Mick closed the door.

Nikki felt all of the weight crushing down on his body, even if it was made of air. He simply stood still, his mind racing like a freight train, trying to take everything in but also getting ready for his next move… being overwhelmed was an understatement, he felt peeled down like an orange and this was only the beginning. He felt like a fucking coward but he just wanted to get over it, was it that bad to accept his fate and disappear without facing anyone?

You are going to abandon him again? You know why you need to talk to Vince, and you know this will be your last chance to see him, asshole!

He went to kick the sand, but he couldn’t touch it. God, how frustrating was that!

So where are we going next?

Nikki would have wanted to scream at him, give him the middle finger and just run away but it wouldn’t have been helpful, would it? So he forced himself to be as neutral as possible.

“Vince Neil. Take me to his house.”

#nikki sixx #Tommy Lee #mick mard #vince neil #motley crue #motley crue fanfiction #80sRock #80s rock band #fanfiction #my writing #tommy lee x nikki sixx

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rhosyn-du · 3 years ago

Text

Never make a mess when a total catastrophe will do - Chapter Two

Pairings: Jimon, past Clace, background Clizzy, a bunch of other minor background pairings Rating: Explicit Art: @cor321 Beta: @all-thestories-aretrue Tags: Alternate Universe - College/University, fake dating, oh my god they were roommates, friends with benefits, idiots to lovers, pining, miscommunication, holidays, drinking games, mistletoe, symbolically significant Oreos, domestic fluff, brief mention of past character death, Jace’s self-worth issues deserve their own tag Summary: What do you do when you find out your sister is not only dating your ex and love-of-your-high-school-life but is also bringing her home for Christmas? Bring your annoying, hot, annoyingly-hot roommate as your fake boyfriend to show them you're totally fine with it, obviously! There's no possible way this could backfire. Link: AO3 , Tumblr Master Post

Chapter Two

They didn’t talk more about it later. Jace barely saw Simon at all over the following couple weeks, in fact. It’s not that he was intentionally avoiding Simon, but they both had final exams to study for, and Simon was wrapped up in guitar ensemble rehearsals for the winter concert on top of that. If Jace had spent a little more of his study time in the library than was strictly necessary and that just happened to prevent any further discussions of dispays of physical affection and practice dates, that was entirely beside the point.

What Jace hadn’t counted on was how unprepared he’d feel pulling up outside the Queen Anne style townhouse he’d called home for most of his childhood. He suddenly wished he’d let Simon talk him into driving together and using the drive as a last minute planning session, even if it meant they’d need to coordinate their trip back to Boston. As much as he’d been avoiding talking about their plan, it really only occurred to Jace on the drive how much he wished they actually had, you know, a plan.

“Wow,” Simon said, hopping out of the hand-painted van he’d parked right behind Jace’s car. “Is that an actual turret?”

“Yup, gotta love those late 19th century architectural fads,” Jace answered as he pulled his suitcase out of the trunk. “The house belonged to Maryse’s grandparents, and I’ve never been able to tell how much she actually likes the style and how much is just childhood nostalgia, but she hasn’t even changed much of the interior except for renovations and repairs.”

“I have a hard time imagining growing up in a place like this,” Simon said as he joined Jace with his own suitcase in hand. “And it’s not like my mom’s house is tiny or anything, but this is just...” He waved a hand vaguely at the house. “A lot.”

He didn’t ask why Jace was sharing a tiny apartment furnished entirely secondhand if his family lived in a house like this, and Jace didn’t offer an explanation.

“You don’t need to be nervous,” Jace said, even though there was plenty to be nervous about. “I promise the house doesn’t bite.”

“Yeah, less worried about the house than the people in it,” Simon told him.

“I thought you were, like, the parent whisperer,” Jace teased. “Isn’t that why you offered to come with me? Because you make a great boyfriend? Trust me, as long as Alec and Izzy think you make me happy, they’ll love you, and you know more about comics than anyone I’ve ever met, so Max will love you regardless.”

“Okay,” Simon said, releasing a heavy breath. “Okay, thanks. You’re right, I just got a little intimidated by the house, but this is all going to be fine.”

“Maryse is probably going to hate you, though,” Jace continued, keeping his face carefully deadpan. “She hates everyone we bring home. It’s like a rite of passage. But you’re great with parents, so I’m sure you’ll at least avoid intentional food poisoning.”

Simon stared at him in horror, and Jace couldn’t keep a hit of a smile from breaking through.

“I hate you,” Simon told him.

“If it makes you feel any better,” Jace said, “I’m pretty sure the food poisoning wasn’t actually intentional.”

“Wait, there was actual food poisoning?”

“Come on,” Jace said, heading toward the door. “I want to get inside before we freeze to death.”

“You are such a dick sometimes,” Simon muttered, catching up to him.

Then, he slipped his free hand into Jace’s like it was a totally normal thing to do, and Jace had to catch himself from tripping over the steps.

“Careful,” Simon said, giving his hand a gentle squeeze. “I’m not going to make a very good impression on your family if you fall and break your neck before we even get inside.”

And there was just nothing to say to that, to how uncomfortable it wasn’t to have Simon’s hand in his like this, to the way it made him want. So Jace simply rolled his eyes and pushed open the front door, letting the scent of home wrap around him like a warm blanket.

“Okay,” Simon said quietly as he surveyed the entryway, complete with antique chandelier. “Feeling a little intimidated again.” And it was so easy for Jace to just give his hand a reassuring squeeze.

“Hey, you made it,” a warm voice greeted them. “With as bad as traffic has been, we thought you’d be another hour at least.”

“Hey, man,” Jace said, dropping Simon’s hand so he could pull his brother into a hug. “People must be staying home for the holidays this year, because we barely hit any traffic at all.” He glanced around. “Where is everyone?”

“Iz should be here any minute, Max is holed up in his room playing video games with his friends, and Magnus is helping Mom with some last-minute grocery shopping for dinner tomorrow.” Alec held out a hand to Simon. “I’m Alec, since Jace apparently can’t be bothered to make introductions like a civilized person.”

“It’s okay,” Simon said, giving his hand a quick shake, “I gave up on the idea of Jace being civilized the first time I saw him eat pizza that had been sitting out on the counter for three days.”

“That was your pizza,” Jace pointed out.

“Yeah,” Simon said, “which I was going to throw away because I forgot about it for three days.”

“On the subject of uncivilized,” Jace said, turning back to Alec, who was looking just a little too pleased, “you really sent Magnus shopping with Maryse? Buddy, if you decided you don’t want to marry the guy, just break it off with him. You don’t have to throw him to the wolves like that.”

Alec’s tiny smile became a little less tiny and a whole lot softer. “Magnus and Mom have actually been getting along lately. She wanted his opinion on wine pairings, so they went to the store and left me here so I can pull the bread out of the oven when it’s done. It’s very weird, but also nice.”

“That does sound very weird,” Jace told him, “but I’m glad things are working out and Maryse has found some level of chill somewhere.”

“Hopefully that means I won’t get poisoned,” Simon said.

Alec snorted. “If you want to avoid it, you should probably avoid mentioning you know about that. Or any other embarrassing family stories Jace might have shared with you.”

“And don’t eat anything Izzy hands you,” Jace added. “Anything she cooks probably won’t kill you, but the taste will make you wish you were dead.”

“So, I should just fast while I’m here,” Simon said. “Good to know.”

Jace led Simon upstairs to drop off their bags while Alec checked on the bread.

“Just toss your bag anywhere,” Jace said, opening the door to his old room. “We can argue over who gets which side of the dresser later.”

“Sure,” Simon said cheerfully, “as long as we can be civil deciding who gets which side of the bed.” He stopped just inside the doorway. “Wow, okay. The apparently very small bed.”

And this really was something that should have occurred to him, Jace realized. It wasn’t that he hadn’t considered that he’d be sharing a bed with Simon. They’d even talked about it, briefly, and agreed it was no big deal. But Jace hadn’t considered exactly how much smaller his childhood bed was than the generous queen he slept in back home. It was technically large enough to fit two grown men, but only technically.

“Don’t worry,” Jace said, falling back on his trademark bravado, “I won’t get mad if you cuddle me in your sleep. I know you can’t help it if your subconscious recognizes that I’m irresistible.”

“I’m more worried about your freakishly sharp elbows,” Simon muttered.

“As long as you don’t snore or steal the covers, you won’t have to worry about my elbows,” Jace told him. He was planning to keep his elbows, and the rest of him, as far away from Simon as possible. Which, given the size of the bed, was maybe three inches.

“Dude, I do not snore,” Simon protested. “You know that; we live together.”

“You absolutely snore after your fourth drink.”

“I wasn’t planning to get drunk with your family,” Simon said, tossing his bag onto the bed.

“You say that now,” Jace said, leaving his own bag next to the door. “But wait until you get the full Lightwood Christmas experience before deciding you want to spend the whole thing sober.”

“If your family drives me to drink, you don’t get to blame me for snoring,” Simon countered. Which was probably fair, but Jace was saved from having to admit that by the sound of voices coming from downstairs.

“That’d be Izzy,” Jace said, “and we’d better get down there before she accuses me of trying to hide you from her.”

“Jace,” called a singsong voice, right on cue, “quit making out with your mystery hottie and get down here so we can actually meet him.”

“You should be careful making demands like that,” Jace called back. “What if I’m not wearing any pants?”

“We’ve all seen it. Get your ass down here “

“I like your sister already,” Simon told him.

“You say that now, but wait until she decides you count as family. She won’t be any better with you.” He took Simon’s hand. Because it helped sell their relationship. Because he could. Simon laced their fingers together, and Jace tried not to feel any way about that at all as he led Simon back down the stairs.

They only made it a couple steps before Simon came to a complete stop, almost causing Jace to trip the rest of the way down the staircase. He heard Simon mutter a soft ‘oh crap’ at the same time a bright, redheaded whirlwind came rushing up the stairs at them.

“Oh my god, Simon?” Clary grabbed Simon into a giant bearhug, effectively tearing his hand out of Jace’s. “You’re Jace’s mystery boyfriend? How did I not know about this? You didn’t even tell me you were dating anyone, you jerk! What happened to best friend gossip privileges?”

Clary pulled back from the hug, and now that Jace could actually see her face, he could see the hint of concern she was trying to hide under her wide smile.

“Clary. Hi,” Simon said, eyes wide. “I was going to tell you, I swear. It’s just, this is kind of new and so...” He trailed off, looking panicked. His eyes caught Jace’s. “But, uh, yeah. This is Jace. My boyfriend. Jace, this is my best friend, Clary Fray.”

“Yeah,” Jace said, looking between the two of them and feeling more than a little out of his depth. He’d planned for things to be weird, but not this weird. “We’ve met.” He flashed Clary a smile. “Fray, huh?”

She nodded. “I couldn’t keep his name. Not after...after everything. Fray is the name Mom used before she married Luke. It’s the name I remember her having when I was little, so.” She shrugged. “I filed the paperwork to have it legally changed the day I turned eighteen.”

“It suits you,” Jace told her, and let himself be pulled into a tight hug that he suspected was as much because she needed one as that she was glad to see him. Clary had never told him much about the biological father she barely knew, but she’d told him enough to know that Clary held him responsible for her mother’s death, even if the courts had cleared him of any wrongdoing.

“Thanks,” Clary whispered, before surreptitiously drying her eyes on his shoulder and pulling back to flash a smile that was less forced than Jace expected. “So, tell me how this happened without me hearing about it.” She bumped Jace with her shoulder. “And if it’s so new, what possessed you to subject Simon to your family holidays?”

“Hey,” Izzy said, walking up behind Clary and wrapping her arms around her girlfriend’s waist. Jace had to admit, they looked...well, right together. “That’s my family, too, you know.”

“Oh, I know,” Clary said, offering a soft grin over her shoulder. “And the fact that I’m here should tell you exactly how much I love you.”

“Fair,” Izzy said, then looked at Simon. “So, how’d my brother convince you to join this circus?”

“We made a trade,” Simon said, straight-faced. “I put up with his family for Christmas and he puts up with mine for my cousin Rachel’s wedding.” He leaned in and told Izzy in a stage whisper, “Also, I’m weak for his smile, but don’t tell him I said that, because he will abuse it.”

“You say that like I don’t already abuse it,” Jace said, sliding his arm around Simon’s waist in a mirror of Izzy and Clary’s pose. “And to answer your earlier question, us being officially together is new, but we’ve been sort of on the verge of dating for ages. Practically since we started sharing an apartment last year.”

Clary let out a peal of delighted laughter. “Oh, you’re the roommate. It makes sense now.” Before Jace could ask what made sense, she was pulling the both of them into a tight hug. “I’m really happy for both of you.”

“If I’d known you were going to be this excited, I definitely would have mentioned it sooner,” Simon said, pulling back from the hug.

Jace tried to catch his eye, wondering what on earth was going on. He knew both Clary and Simon well enough to know he was missing something, but he had no idea what it was. Simon ignored him, and that just made Jace more suspicious.

“Come on,” Izzy said. “You can have your hug fest later. Right now, I want to help Alec get things set up in the kitchen and maybe surprise Mom by getting dinner started before she gets back.”

Jace and Clary exchanged a panicked look, and Jace frantically searched his mind for excuses to keep Izzy busy. He didn’t actually want a repeat of the food poisoning episode, after all.

“Actually,” Simon said, turning a bright smile on Izzy. “I was kind of hoping you’d be willing to show me your Lego Star Wars collection before we get too wrapped up in family stuff. Jace mentioned you have the deluxe Imperial Star Destroyer set from the early 2000’s, and I’ve never actually seen one in person.”

“Oh,” Izzy said, looking torn. “I’m not sure—”

“We can help Alec in the kitchen,” Clary said quickly. “You two go do your nerd thing. I knew this was inevitable when I finally introduced you two anyway. And this way I get the chance to harass my bestie’s new boyfriend without him in the way trying to keep me from learning the embarrassing details.”

“You know, on second thought—” Simon began, looking slightly panicked.

“Come on,” Izzy interrupted, smiling brightly and grabbing his hand.

Simon flashed Clary a betrayed look, then looked to Jace for support. Jace simply smiled at him.

“Don’t worry, love muffin,” he said mildly. “I’d never intentionally embarrass you.”

“I want you to know that I hate both of you,” Simon said before allowing Izzy to drag him back up the stairs.

“My collection is all still in my old room,” Izzy said. “Clary and I have been looking for an apartment big enough I can actually move the rest of my stuff out of here, but so far we haven’t found anything in our price range.”

Jace turned back to Clary. “Exactly what kind of embarrassing stories were you hoping for? Because I have many.”

Clary shook her head. “I’m pretty sure I’ve got more embarrassing Simon stories than you do. I’ve got almost two decades worth. But I was actually hoping to talk to you alone anyway, and this seems like the best chance we’re going to get.”

Jace followed her down the stairs and into the study. “Sounds serious. You planning to give me a shovel talk?”

Clary laughed, shaking her head. “No, I know you, remember? I’m not worried about you hurting Simon. Well,” she amended, “not any more than I am about him hurting you.” She met his eyes with a soft smile. “You might be the only person I know with a heart as big as Simon’s, as much as you try to hide it.”

Jace looked away. It had been two years since the last time he’d seen her, and she could still see right to the heart of him. He didn’t want to know what she’d see if she kept looking. “Clary—”

“Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me,” she teased. “But I didn’t actually bring you out here to talk about Simon. I wanted to apologize.”

Jace frowned, looking back at her. “You’ve got nothing to apologize for.” He was more than a little grateful not to have Clary grilling him about his entirely fabricated relationship, but he wasn’t sure where this conversation was going.

“No, I do,” she insisted. “I promised to keep in touch when you moved away, and I didn’t.”

“It’s not a big deal,” Jace said, even if maybe it had been at first. Those first few months at school had been hard. Jace always thought he was used to being alone, especially after his mother’s suicide, but he found out just how much he’d come to rely on his new family when he didn’t see them every day. They’d kept in touch, of course, but with Izzy immersed in her studies and Alec all wrapped up in his new relationship with Magnus, it wasn’t anything like what it had been when they were all under one roof.

For a while, he and Clary had been in touch nearly every day, sometimes texting multiple times a day. Jace told her about his classes and how much he liked Boston, and Clary told him all about trying to narrow down which art schools she wanted to apply to. It was almost the same sort of easy friendship they’d had before he left, after they agreed they were better off as friends.

But after a couple months, Clary’s messages came less and less often, and eventually stopped altogether. Jace tried not to let it bother him, but he started drinking a bit too much and going to a few too many parties. Which was how he’d met Maia, his attempts at flirting somehow leading to him getting his ass handed to him at beer pong, and soon he found himself with an entire group of new friends. Although Maia insisted for almost a year that she and Jace were merely antagonistic acquaintances.

Clary gave him a look that told him she knew exactly how full of it he was. “It was a shitty thing to do, and I was a shitty friend,” she told him. “Especially because I did it on purpose. Izzy and I started getting close and I started to have feelings for her, and I didn’t know what to say to you about it. I didn’t know how to even talk to you about what was going on in my life without mentioning that she was becoming such a big part of it.”

“You didn’t actually have to hide it from me, you know,” Jace said. “I was surprised when Izzy first told me, but I’m mostly just glad you’re both happy. And seeing you together, I know you both are.”

“Thanks,” Clary said. “I didn’t want to hurt you or make things weird. For a while, I thought I could just ignore what I was feeling, but Iz is just... She’s not someone you can ignore, you know?”

“Oh, I know exactly how hard my sister is to ignore, believe me.” Jace stopped, considered, then admitted something he had never said—would never say—to another person. But this was Clary, and he knew she would never repeat it. And even if she did, he could always play it off as part of the act. “She and Simon have that in common. You know, I actually thought I hated him at first? He’s so enthusiastic about everything, and so sincere, and just.” He shrugged. “Not the kind of person I thought would ever do it for me.”

“But he won you over with his boyish charm?” Clary guessed.

“Mm,” Jace agreed. And the way he loved without reserve. Not just his family and friends, but his music, his favorite films, even the crappy nachos from the 7-11 down the block from their apartment. Simon loved every part of life, and being around him, Jace could almost imagine what that felt like. “Well, that and his abs.”

“Can’t forget those,” Clary laughed.

“Not with how often he eats breakfast shirtless,” Jace agreed. “Come on. If we aren’t in the kitchen by the time Izzy gets back downstairs, you know she’ll try to help Alec herself, and I was kind of hoping for dinner to be edible.”

~~~

Dinner was surprisingly painless. Maryse was more relaxed and happy than Jace had ever seen her, and he couldn’t help wondering how much of that was related to the very unsubtle smiles she kept exchanging with Clary’s stepfather. Even Max, who was deep in throes of preteen scorn, grudgingly admitted that Simon being in a band was “pretty cool” and joined in on some of Simon, Clary, and Izzy’s excited nerd talk that went entirely over Jace’s head.

After dinner, they retired to the living room for eggnog and carols. Jace limited himself to a single cup of Magnus’s infamous eggnog, knowing better than to let himself get drunk when he was putting on a show for his family. Or sharing his tiny bed with Simon.

As usual, Jace let himself get pushed over the piano to play. He felt something in him settle as soon as he rested his fingers on the keys of Maryse’s baby grand, the feel different and so much more familiar than the ancient keyboard he had back in Boston or the well-used uprights in the practice rooms at school.

When Jace had first come to live with the Lightwoods, he’d been afraid to touch the piano. His mother had put him in lessons as soon as he was old enough, but she hated to listen to him play and often chastised him for not being a better player, saying he should be better at it with how talented his father was. Now, he understood that it was just another manifestation of the combined grief and mental illness that led to Celine’s death, but at the time he’d hated how awful he was at playing, no matter how much he enjoyed doing it.

But Maryse knew he played and encouraged him to use her piano. She told him that it had been her father’s, and though she’d taken lessons herself as a child, she’d never really loved it the way he had. She said that the instrument deserved to be loved, and as long as Jace loved playing it, she didn’t care how good he was or wasn’t.

It was the first time he’d really felt like this could be his home.

“Okay,” Jace said after the third version of O Tannenbaum with ridiculous altered lyrics—this one courtesy of Simon rather than Max or Clary, about an ill-fated toad who chose the wrong moment to cross the street, “I think my fingers are done for the night.”

“Oh, come on,” Clary said. “Simon and I have at least a dozen more of these we came up with when we were kids.”

“When we were little, I only knew the lyrics to the Christmas songs they played on the radio, so Fray made up silly lyrics to the other ones and told me they were real,” Simon explained. “And it made her so happy that I went along with it even for the couple I did know.”

“There will be plenty of time for more singing tomorrow,” Maryse said. “But if I know this one,” she continued, smiling at Max, “we’re all going to be dragged out of bed at the crack of dawn for presents.”

“Mom,” Max whined, “I’m not a kid anymore. I know the presents will still be there whenever I get up.”

“I seem to remember someone who looked an awful lot like you waking us up before sunrise last year,” Magnus said with exaggerated confusion. “Perhaps you have a twin I haven’t met?”

Max fixed him with a withering look. “Last year, I was eleven. This year I’m twelve,” he said, as though that explained it.

“Well, I’m glad to hear you’ve grown out of it,” Alec told him. “Because I intend to sleep in. And if you try to get me out of bed early, I’ll remind you of this conversation.”

“Oh, no need for that, darling,” Magnus said cheerfully. “I’ll just barricade the door before we go to sleep so he can’t get to us.”

“Brilliant,” Alec said, giving Magnus a frankly sappy smile. “I knew there was a reason I loved you.”

“And on that note,” Jace said, “I think I’m going to head to bed before I die of sweetness overdose.”

“Oh, please,” Magnus said, giving him an unimpressed look. “We all saw you and Simon making eyes at each other over those cookies you were frosting earlier.”

“It’s true,” Izzy said before Jace could protest. “You don’t get to tease Alec about being a sap anymore, not now that we’ve all actually seen you with someone you love.”

Jace froze, his mouth half open, then quickly snapped it shut. It made sense that Izzy would assume. He’d brought Simon home for Christmas, after all. That was the story they were selling even if they hadn’t actually discussed it, even if it wasn’t something Jace had said or even implied. And whatever he did feel for Simon, it certainly wasn’t love. It was, at best, a friendly crush. A very intense friendly crush.

Izzy seemed to realize her mistake, glancing between him and Simon with a look of dawning panic.

“No, you’re misunderstanding how this works,” Simon said easily, because of course Izzy’s words hadn’t sent him into a panic the way they had Jace. “Jace gets to tease Alec, and you, and you both get to tease him back.”

“Yep,” Clary agreed. “Those are the rules, because that means I still get to tease Simon.”

“Please,” Izzy said. “Clary and I are too sophisticated to be sappy.”

“I’m pretty sure I heard you call Clary ‘cuddle bug’ earlier,” Alec said.

“And I definitely saw you laugh at that terrible joke she told at dinner,” Jace added.

“She ate one of the cookies you made,” Max accused.

“Yeah, sorry, cutie,” Clary said. “We’re really pretty sappy.”

“Fine,” Izzy huffed. “But I just think you’re all jealous because I’ve got the cutest girlfriend.”

“Yes, Izzy,” Alec said drily. “You’ve uncovered my secret. I’m extremely jealous of your girlfriend.”

“I knew it,” Izzy said smugly, as though Alec had been perfectly sincere.

“Definitely in danger of dying of sweetness overdose,” Jace said.

That set off another round of teasing, this time with Izzy throwing in not so subtle attempts to drag Maryse and Luke into it. Jace wasn’t sure why Izzy was so determined to make the two admit there was something between them. It was obvious there was just from the way they acted around each other. Maryse would tell them when she was ready, just like she had when she and Robert filed for divorce.

It was almost another hour before Jace finally made his way up the stairs toward his room. He was surprised when Simon rose to follow him, but didn’t say anything until they were back in his room.

“I’m surprised you didn’t stay to nerd out with Clary and Iz some more.”

“I get to talk to Clary all the time,” he said with a shrug. “Besides, it’ll be easier to keep up the whole fake boyfriend thing if I don’t let her get me alone. She’d definitely figure out something’s up if I let her start grilling me about our relationship. Also, you don’t get to call me a nerd when you know just as much about Star Wars as I do.”

“It’s impossible to grow up with Izzy and not know way too much about Star Wars,” Jace said, pulling off his shirt and tossing it over a chair. “Are you still sure about doing this? Neither of us counted on Clary, and I’ll understand if you want to back out.”

“Huh?” Simon said, sounding distracted. Jace turned to look at him and thought he detected the faintest flush on Simon’s cheeks when he met his eyes. “I mean, yeah, no, I’m not backing out.” He gave an uncomfortable shrug as he pulled a set of pajamas out of his suitcase. “The last thing I want is to have to explain this whole thing to Clary.”

“Good point,” Jace agreed, turning around to put on his own pajama bottoms. It was tempting to watch Simon change, but it was also a very bad idea. “I don’t want to think about what she’d have to say to both of us if she knew.”

There was a beat of silence before Simon asked, “So, do you, um, have a preferred side of the bed?”

Jace turned to look at him, only a little disappointed to find Simon fully dressed in his pajamas. As usual when someone asked a question he didn’t want to think about, Jace flashed a smirk. “In a bed this small, I usually just take up the whole thing.”

“Well, unless you want me on top of you, you should pick a side,” Simon said, unimpressed. “Because I’m not sleeping on the floor.”

“I’ll take the left,” Jace said quickly, trying and mostly failing to avoid thinking about exactly how much he did want Simon on top of him. “I’m just gonna hit the bathroom real quick.”

Which was how Jace found himself locked in the tiny guest bathroom, lip caught between his teeth as he frantically tugged at his cock. He hadn’t planned on jerking off, but he couldn’t get Simon’s words out of his head, and he sure as hell wasn’t getting into bed with Simon half-hard, which was really the only other option.

He could picture it far too easily. Simon pressing him into that ridiculously tiny bed, hands gentle but firm, mouth just a little bit desperate.

He came to the thought of rutting up against those ridiculous abs.

By the time Jace cleaned himself up and returned to his room, Simon was nestled under the covers on the right side of the bed. Seeing him like that made something in Jace’s chest clench, and he flipped the light off just so he wouldn’t have to look anymore.

“‘Night,” Simon said as Jace slid into bed, taking care to stay entirely on his side.

“Don’t even think about snoring,” Jace answered.

He lay in the dark for a long time, staring into the darkness, listening to the sounds of the city that didn’t quite drown out the soft breathing of the man beside him. He tried not to think about how easy and relaxed the night had been, how perfect it would have been if only half of it weren’t a lie.

#shadowhunters #shmb2021 #jimon #jimon fic #jace wayland #simon lewis

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let-me-write-shit · 4 years ago

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Somebody To You: 25

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Word Count: 4071

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CHAPTER TWENTY FIVE

There was no use in dwelling over Harry right now. It seemed silly to even want to cry, considering Paul, who was seated across from her, was literally fighting for his life. Who was she to cry over a boy that had no interest in dating her? Her problems seemed minuscule to the real tragedies happening all around her. The four of them finished up dinner and when they had finished, Carol whisked their dishes away to wash.

“I should get Zoey over to her mom’s to change now so I can get to the bar in time,” Michael called, standing up, “We’ll meet you there later?”

“Yeah, go on. We’ll see you there,” Paul nodded from his seat at the table.

Being alone with Michael wasn’t as awkward as she thought it’d be. His old, beat-up red car, which usually reeked of stale cigarettes, now only had a lingering scent that was hidden behind the sweet smell of moonlight breeze Gain car fresheners. He explained to her how he’d quit smoking a month ago and it was going well. The twenty-minute conversation to her parents’ house didn’t seem forced like she expected it to be. And he hadn’t once made a pass at her. Maybe he finally moved on.

When she led him into the landing of her parents’ house, her mom’s voice rang out, “Zoey? Is that you?”

“Yeah, I’ve got Mikey with me!” she called back, urging him on.

She could hear her mom’s voice sing his name from the other room and they both shared a look, knowing that Michael was about to be trapped in the endless tirades of Mary. Zoey giggled watching him drag his feet in the directions of the living room, leaving her to go change.

“Hurry,” he quietly urged before he rounded the corner.

She had managed to take up her luggage that morning, so she made her way towards the bedroom, noticing Katie’s bed neatly made and the lights still off. Her car was in the driveway when they arrived, so she must be in the living room with her mom.

Rummaging through her suitcase, Zoey grew more frustrated, feeling silly. All of her clothes were new and were geared more towards her life in LA. Her wardrobe had changed along with her personality and she felt like if she walked downstairs wearing any of these clothes Michael would see right through her and think that she was an imposter.

She had no choice. She didn’t fit into Katie’s clothes and there was no time to go shopping. With a sigh, she slipped into a straight, spaghetti-strapped, white dress and paired it with white sneakers and a jean jacket to make it look more casual. She ran her fingers through her dirty blonde hair, looking at herself in the reflection of Katie’s mirror, finally embracing her new look. This was her. It took years to feel comfortable in her own skin and she wasn’t going to let her insecurities ruin that.

Zoey bounced down the stairs and towards the living room where, sure enough, Katie sat beside Michael, both listening to Mary blabber on about how sorry she was to hear the news of Michael’s dad and the trauma he and Zoey have experienced already. Zoey would have felt embarrassed for her mother’s constant and unwanted reminders, but Michael was used to it having had Mary in his life for five years now. He knew she meant no harm from it and had grown enough thick skin by this point to not pay it any mind.

“I’m ready,” Zoey announced, walking into the room.

“Where are you going?” Katie asked curiously.

Michael stood up, “I have a show tonight at Slyfox. You can join us if you want.”

Before Katie could respond, Mary interrupted, chuckling slightly, “No, Katie’s too young to go.”

“But I’m eighteen! And Zoey will be there!” Katie countered, eyes pleading, but to no avail. Her mom wouldn’t budge.

“Sorry, kiddo,” Michael roughed up Katie’s hair, “maybe next time.”

Zoey always appreciated how Michael treated her younger sister and tried to include her in things, even though it usually got shot down by her parents. Zoey had tried talking to her mom about loosening the reins on Katie a little bit, but the conversation clearly hadn’t done much. At least she started college soon. Her freedom was only weeks away.

“You nervous to see your old coworkers?” Michael asked as they loaded back into the car.

Zoey, shrugged, “A little. But I miss them.”

“Well, the guys are excited to see you,” he said, mentioning his bandmates, “I think Dan is bringing Becky, so you’ll get to see her, too.”

Zoey smiled. Becky was Dan’s girlfriend. The two of them have been dating since right around the time she and Michael first got together. Becky was a sweet girl, but shy like her sister. The two of them had gotten along really well, hanging out during their band rehearsals and attending their little shows together. Zoey liked to think that she had helped Becky come out of her shell in the beginning.

“Listen,” Michael started, his tone a little hesitant as he scratched the back of his head, “I think I should warn you, in case you hear it from any of the guys, but, uh...I’m kinda seeing someone.”

“Oh?”

She had been anticipating this conversation. She knew the day would come where Michael would have moved on and started dating again, but honestly, it threw her off guard. She was happy for him, don’t get her wrong, but there would always be a part of her that still loved Michael. They had been through a lot together for nearly five years and she was so close to his family. There were so many plans and expectations within their relationship that they never got to carry out. They had talked about kids and marriage and buying a house together, and it ended before either of them could accomplish any of it. She wasn’t hurt. She’s the one that ended things, after all. And she didn’t regret that decision, either. But it still left her a little sad. It was the ending of an era.

Michael rushed to explain himself, his tone still the same. She could tell he was trying to ease into it, afraid of hurting her feelings, “It’s nothing serious, yet. But, yeah, I just thought you should know.”

Zoey turned to look at him, grinning understandingly, “I’m happy for you. You deserve it.”

Michael smiled back, nodding. She could see the relief wash over him as his shoulders relaxed. It’s weird - being back in this car with him. There were so many memories involving this car. A stain on the upholstery of her seat from when she accidentally spilled hot chocolate after a spontaneous midnight Wawa run. Warn out stereo buttons from the endless song skipping they did on their long road trips to the Poconos. A dent in the dash from when she had kicked it a little too hard in an attempt to get to the back seat. The number of times they had car sex in the back was, admittedly, a bit ridiculous.

It started pretty early on at the beginning of their relationship. They met at the Slyfox. His band was playing a gig while she bartended. His friends dared him to ask her for her phone number, typical young kid shit. Then it turned into them sneaking away during break to have sex in his car. She’d always come back in, hair disheveled, trying her best to act nonchalant. She had an inkling everyone knew what she was doing, but no one said anything. Not like Andy would. Andy had no problem calling her out.

They had their fair share of fun during their relationship, that’s for sure. And Jess liked him, which only furthered her appeal for him. Jess, as kind and personable as she was, was very protective over Zoey and the men she dated. Having fun was one thing, but if you were going to make it official, it better be a good guy. It wasn’t often that Jess approved of the guys she dated. It could have been why Zoey held onto her relationship for so long. She always had a feeling that she was destined for something, or someone, else. But Jess liked her and Zoey loved his family, so why bother ruining that on a nagging hunch?

She knew now that she was right. They were destined for something else. It was proof enough that she needed to listen to her instincts more. Which is why she tried so hard to listen to her instincts when trying to cut things off with Harry. Ever heard of the saying ‘If you care about something, let it go. If it returns, it was meant to be?’ It wasn’t a test for Harry. He didn’t get brownie points if he shot her a random text saying ‘Sorry. Let’s date.’ But, to her, there was some sort of truth in the statement. She knew how much she cared about Harry, romantically, and platonically. Harry was, in every literal sense of the word, her soulmate. She knew it to be true very early on in their relationship.

Zoey honestly believed that this hiccup that was happening between them wouldn’t last forever. Things may not end up the way she wanted; she might not ever get the chance to be with him on an intimate level again. And she was okay with that if it meant just having him in his life. But he needed to be ready. Emotionally, he still didn’t know who he was or what he wanted to become. He needed to figure that out himself. She had no doubt in her mind that he would return to her one day. Maybe not tomorrow. Maybe not a year from now. Maybe not even ten years from now. But one day, he’d be back. She had to believe that. She needed to believe that. Otherwise, she just made the biggest mistake of her life.

Pulling up to the bar filled her with the biggest sense of nostalgia. When they walked through the door and the aroma of liquor and greasy food hit her, a smile instantly formed on her face. Everything still looked the same as it did the day she left. Lighting so dim that it took a minute to adjust, old tables and chairs scattered throughout the building, a poorly wiped down bartop with early 2000’s hits playing loudly over the speaker, patrons scattered around loudly yapping at each other. She saw the wall of framed pictures with workers and various ‘famous’ people, who weren’t all that famous to begin with, but noticeable enough. She noticed one framed picture that stood out from the rest. It wasn’t quite in the center, but close to it. A framed picture of Jess smiling and holding up a bottle of beer with light-up necklaces and gaudy party hats amongst the rest of their coworkers, Zoey standing right beside her, with an edited banner at the bottom that read ‘Jessica Lewis. Rest In Peace.’.

Zoey remembered the day that picture was taken. It was New Years a few months before Jess died. Their boss had gathered everyone together to take a picture for their Facebook page to advertise discounted drinks. Jess was in the center because of course she was. Everyone loved him.

“Zoey?” she heard the familiar booming voice of Dan, Michael’s friend, and the singer of their band. She turned and smiled seeing him and the rest of the guys in the band walking towards her. “Holy shit, I almost didn’t recognize you with your hair down. How have you been? You look hot!”

Zoey laughed, giving him and the rest of the boys hugs. Dan was always very blunt, as were the rest of the guys. Before she could respond, Zach, the drummer, joked, “Not here to waste your time on this loser again, are you?” he backhanded Michael on the chest with a smirk.

“Absolutely not,” she laughed, bantering, “I live in LA now. I’ve got a city full of D-list celebrities at my disposal.”

Suddenly, she heard a screeching echo from behind the bar and turned to see her old coworker, Riley, jumping over, “Shut the fuck up! Zoey? What the hell are you doing back here?” She ran, practically tackling Zoey into the wall with such force that a framed fire exit picture came crashing to the ground. Riley paid it no mind, however, as she was too busy admiring Zoey’s hair and outfit. “Fuck! What’s in the LA water? You look so good!”

After seeing the commotion that Riley caused, more of her old coworkers had realized who had come in and they all started running over to greet her, welcoming her back with warm hugs and compliments. Michael and the guys had excused themselves to finish setting up while Zoey made her way over to the bar so that she could continue talking to her friends while they worked, laughing, and exchanging old stories while they caught her up on what’s been going on at the bar.

She felt a presence standing behind her and she turned to see Becky, a nervous grin on her face. Zoey’s eyes lit up and she stood to pull her into a hug, “Becky, I missed you!”

“I missed you, too,” she muttered, smiling wider. “I was wondering when you’d come back to visit. Wish it was on better terms, though. I’m sure Paul was happy to see you.”

Zoey nodded solemnly, “It’s hard to believe it’s real, you know?”

“I know, he’s a good man.”

It didn’t take long for the boys to finish up their tuning before they were finally introduced and began playing. Monday nights were always live-music nights at Slyfox in an attempt to draw in more business. And it worked pretty well. The first half of the night was always slower, but the crowds usually started pouring in around 9 PM and you could always be sure to see the same groups of people coming in.

Eventually, Michael’s parents had gotten there. They always did their best to attend any performance of their son’s, always having been supportive of his hobby of music. They knew all of the songs, singing and dancing along. Zoey always admired their parenting and knew that if she were ever given the chance to be a mother, she would want to be just like them.

Listening to the band play brought Zoey back even more. She felt like she was reliving her memories at this point. The only reason she wasn’t entirely warped into this false sense of reality was because Jess wasn’t there. It just didn’t feel right being here without her. The familiar chords of a slower song began playing. It was a song that Michael had written about Zoey in their first year of dating, and to this day was still one of the favorites amongst the crowd. It wasn’t cheesy or too romantic; just about seeing a pretty girl from across the bar. But it was a tradition for Paul to dance with Zoey to this song.

Instinctively, the two turned to look at each other and Carol smiled, knowingly, as Paul struggled for a split second to stand up, “I’ve got to dance with my girl,” he grinned, holding a hand out for her.

Zoey grinned, taking his hand as he led her a few feet away at the edge of the crowd of people before she turned and put a hand gently on her waist while the other continued to hold onto her hand. Paul was a tall man, towering over her a good eight inches. She rested her head on his chest, bonier than she remembered it being. But it eased her tension to hear his heart beating strongly in his chest. She thought, for a moment, maybe it wasn’t true. Maybe he wasn’t dying. A man this good and this kind couldn’t be taken from them. But she felt his weight beginning to bear down on her, becoming too tired to stand for much longer. She felt angry and upset. Why was this happening? It wasn’t fair.

“You alright?” she whispered, trying not to sound too concerned.

His voice replied, more strained, but confident, “Yeah, I’ve got a strong dance partner.”

The song ended and Zoey led him back towards his wife who urged him to sit down while Zoey shared a quick look with Michael. He nodded, seeing the worry in her eyes, and she knew that he felt it, too.

Harry hardly got any sleep that night, and by the next morning, he had practically downed a quart of coffee at his mother’s house for breakfast with her and Gemma, the words from the fight of last night repeating in his head. He analyzed every tone in each word he spoke, infuriating himself. He was better than that. He knew he was. For years he has been handling tough, hard-hitting questions with grace and ease. Why was it that he struggled when it came to his own intimate relationships he got flustered and spoke out of his ass? Almost every single thing he said he didn’t mean. Why was it so hard for him?

Zoey was right. She had never been anything but open and honest with him. There was no reason for him to feel like he couldn’t tell her any of what he was feeling. He didn’t need to worry about hurting her feelings because she was the most understandable person he knew. He was so caught up in being afraid that he was going to lose her, that he pushed her away. What kind of idiot did that make him?

He wanted to call her back or text her, but he didn’t know what to say. An apology seemed pitiful. He couldn’t seem to find the right words to express just how regretful he was. And he still couldn’t figure out everything he was feeling enough to give her an answer to her question. He cared for her so deeply that hearing the silence on the other end of the line just about shattered his heart. And waking up this morning to texts from everyone but her only made it worse.

He wondered how her night was with Michael. She said that she had no intention of getting back with him, but he still found himself wondering if he had pushed her back into the arms of her ex. He knew how strong of a relationship she had with his family, it was certainly possible. He needed to stop thinking this way. He needed to stop assuming.

“Now, I know you don’t have jetlag,” Harry’s mom, Anne, spoke after placing her cup on the table, noticing Harry’s exhaustion, “Rome is only an hour difference. What’s the matter, darling?”

“You look like you got dumped,” Gemma teased, unknowingly.

The look on Harry’s face must have hit both women at the same time because their eyes widened in realization and they shared a glance before Anne spoke again, more softly, “Is it that Zoey girl?”

“Mom,” Harry warned.

“I didn’t know you two were dating,” Gemma spoke.

“We weren’t.”

“Well did something happen in Italy, then?” his sister pressed. When Harry didn’t answer, her eyebrows raised and a smirk began to form, “It did, didn’t it? I knew you liked her!”

“Yeah, well, I’m pretty sure she hates me now.”

“What happened, dear?” his mom asked, placing a hand on top of his.

Harry sighed, slouching more in his chair, “Do we have to talk about this?”

“Well, maybe we can be of some help,” his mom offered.

Harry hesitated, taking a moment to decide before taking a breath. Why not? “It’s my fault, really. Things happened in Italy and they were great. But then she asked where our relationship was going and I panicked and said I didn’t know and accused her of still wanting to be with her ex-boyfriend because she flew home to visit him.”

“Why is she visiting her ex-boyfriend?” Gemma asked, her face screwed up in judgment.

Harry winced, covering his face with his hands, embarrassed as he explained, “Because she found out his dad is dying of cancer and has three months to live. And she’s extremely close to him.”

The girls gasped. He didn’t need to look up at their faces. He knew that the judgment they had for Zoey a second ago would be shifted onto him. And his intuition was correct as he heard his mom breathe his name in disappointment, “Oh, Harry.” He looked up to see her eyes filled with sadness, almost pleading, “You didn’t.”

He groaned, throwing his head back, “I know. I don’t know why I said it. She’s the one that broke up with him in the first place. I just panicked!”

“Well, why did you panic, you idiot? You obviously like her!” Gemma urged, as though it was the most obvious thing on the planet.

“You know how hard dating is for me!” Harry defended himself, “It’s a lot more complicated than just liking each other.”

“Darling,” Anne spoke so evenly that she made everything sound so simple and plain, “It’s okay to be worried. We know your life isn’t as black and white as most people, and that’s okay. But you remember how it feels to lose a loved one from cancer. Remember Robin and Johannah? Remember how hard that was for you? All she needs is someone who understands and someone who can be there for her. Not the added pressure that you put on her.”

“I know. I messed up,” Harry groaned into his palms, “I don’t know what to do. I really don’t want to lose her. I’m just…I don’t know. My life isn’t easy to keep up with.”

“Do you care about her?” Anne asked.

“Yes.”

“Then don’t you think she can decide if she can keep up with you or not?”

“....yes.”

“Then tell her, you idiot!” Gemma smacked him.

“What if she’s still pissed off at me? What if she doesn’t want anything to do with me?” he stressed.

Anne shot her daughter a look of warning before calmly explaining, “Darling, you both clearly care about each other. She might still be upset, but I doubt she’d be unwilling to talk to you. You don’t have to jump into a relationship if you don’t want to. But you should be honest with yourself and her and have a conversation about what you really want out of it. If you just want her in your life as a friend, then tell her. But if seeing her with someone else is upsetting you that much, then maybe you should give it a try. All I will say on the matter is that you seemed genuinely happy when she was in your life. Just be honest with her. Lay all of your feelings out on the table and go from there.”

Harry took a breath, letting the words his mother said to sink in. He needed time to gather his thoughts. He needed to figure out everything he felt. He looked at his phone to see the time. It was 9 AM in London.

“It’s too early to call her right now,” he said, “It’s only 3 AM.”

“Don’t call her! Go to her!” Gemma threw her hands up.

“Honey, he just flew back home. He can just Facetime her or something.”

“Mom, it’ll be more romantic if he flies to her!” she shot back, turning to Harry, “Just go to her. You said you visited her family before. Do you remember where they lived?”

Harry sat up, intrigued by what his sister was saying, “Y-yeah, I think so. I have her family’s phone number, though. I could always get it.”

“Then go!”

Harry nodded, flustered trying to get up from his seat.

“Not this second, Harry,” Anne reached up to his arm with a laugh, “You can carry out your Romantic Comedy fantasy after breakfast.”

Harry laughed, nervously as the two of the girls he loved most in his life chuckled at him and took a swig of their coffees, nerves rushing through his veins. How could he eat now? He was too anxious.

KEEP READING

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Taglist for Somebody To You:

@thurhomish , @stilljosiegrossie , @odetostep , @apples2019 , @stylesmioamore , @inyourhaven

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erekiosuncreativeideas · 5 years ago

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Being Human - Chapter 03

<= Chapter 02

Summary : The group is trying to find a way to reverse all of this. It does not go as planned. Also available on AO3 : https://archiveofourown.org/works/24826561/chapters/60472282

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New chapter ! I hope you'll like it ! Thank you so much for all your like, reblogs and support, it helps me so much, you have no idea !! Really, thank you !

I commissioned a drawing from @cheesytrishy for this chapter ! Go support her art, it's so beautiful !!

The "Oh The Humanity" AU belongs to @doodledrawsthings !

I wish you all a happy reading !

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Chapter 3 - “I don’t want to stay like this…”

Snatcher had guessed pretty well that walking was going to be a difficult experience. After all, it was hard to stand up for someone who had been used to floating around for centuries! However, he didn’t think it would be that hard, if he had to be completely honest.

Assisted by his minion and the two brats, the ghost was trying to put one foot after the other, doing his best to keep his balance. The kids were holding him up by the waist, while the spirit had put his hands on their shoulders. As for his minion, they were pushing his back, to keep him from falling backwards. At first, the group had thought it would work pretty well, considering that Snatcher’s human body wasn’t exactly heavy… But it was much more complicated than what they first thought.

Thus, the group was walking through Subcon Forest, in order to reach the shade’s tree house. Yet, while they wanted to remain discreet… The newly founded group wasn’t exactly silent.

-“For peck’s sake, stop leaning on me so much!” snapped the hatted child in a hush, irritated at the weight he was putting on her shoulder as he was trying to keep his balance: “It hurts!”

Snatcher gritted his teeth and rolled his eyes, retorting with annoyance:

-“Well, if you were doing a better job of helping me walking, maybe it wouldn’t hurt so much!”

-“I swear, I’m going to let go of you if you keep that up,” threatened the brat in retaliation, apparently not liking where the conversation was going. She lightly loosened her grip on him to prove her words, showing him she could very well take her arms away if she wanted to. To the shade’s discontent, it was more than enough to shut him up, as he didn’t really want to experience falling down again.

Physical pain was so awful. Well, just like being alive was, generally speaking.

The bow-wearing kid and the subconite glanced at each other briefly, silently worrying about the time bomb that was the other two. They had been bickering since the beginning and, from what they were seeing, it wasn’t going to stop. Furthermore, some parts of the forest being quite rugged didn’t help to pacify the duo. It was a wonder that no other minions had noticed them as they were crossing the forest.

Soon, they managed to get to Snatcher’s home, very much recognizable from how big the tree was compared to all the others. A yellowish light was coming from the lamps scattered all around it and the ghost couldn’t help but let out a sigh of relief at the sight: they were finally here. He didn’t exactly know how long it took them to actually arrive, but it sure had seemed like hours to him. All of his muscles were extremely painful and tired from the effort. It probably wasn’t much for any normal person, but his situation was far from being normal.

-“Come on, Snatcher, only a few feet away!” encouraged the younger brat. She hesitated to pat him on the back as a supportive gesture but held herself back. The guilty look on her face probably showed that she remembered how oversensitive his body was at the moment. The spirit couldn’t help but feel a bit of gratefulness, though he quickly pushed that emotion out of his mind.

It was their fault if he was in this particular situation to begin with!

The group approached the tree and, after a few steps, entered the open living room. The brats and the minion helped him to sit in his purple armchair, for him to rest. As soon as his body was able to relax on the chair, the shade gave out another sigh, this time of content. He could feel himself sink into the comfortable fabric, gravity pulling him down. The rest of the team sighed as well, apparently very glad to not have to hold him up anymore. The hatted child stretched out, soon imitated by her younger friend. The minion just watched them silently for a while and then came closer to the resting spirit:

-“So, Boss. What are we looking for?” they questioned, more than ready to help the shade.

The words brought the latter back to reality. It wasn’t the time to rest, they had a lot of research to do! He straightened up, feeling the joints of his bones crack from the sudden movement. He winced at the sensation: God, he would never get used to that.

Forcing himself to focus on the current situation, the spirit pointed at the closet in front of him, trying to stay impassive despite the gesture hurting his arm.

-“There are books in there. The ones at the bottom are those about magic. Take them out and give them to me,” he instructed, watching them opening the closet after his words. They took out the books he had mentioned, bringing them to him. Most of them were quite large and heavy, thus not very easy to carry around, especially for small people like them. Snatcher’s minion almost tripped while holding one of them, barely managing to find back his balance. In any other case, it would have made him laugh out loud, yet he couldn’t find the energy to smile in the state he was in.

He was too much in pain for that.

Little by little, a pile of books formed at his feet and he quickly grabbed one to read in the meantime. It was a thick book, with a dark and solid cover. The surface was soft and the ghost couldn’t help but let his fingers run on it. His mind became blank as he felt the texture under his skin. It was… So weird to feel things again. It was still very unpleasant, of course! Yet, there was something more this time, something he couldn’t quite place at the moment.

Was it… A feeling of nostalgia? He couldn’t really know.

Soon enough, he felt stares on him and he lifted his head, seeing the others watching him with a worried expression. When his eyes met theirs, they quickly glanced elsewhere, as if they had never been staring at him in the first place. The ghost squinted, but remained silent, not wishing to cause another argument: he was too tired for that.

-“I’m not sure we’ll find anything useful in them…” said the bow-wearing kid, tentatively.

Snatcher frowned, not liking what she was implying:

-“How would you know? You don’t know magic, as far as I can tell,” he reminded her, sharply, clenching his fists as the words left his mouth. This time, the hatted brat answered him, putting her hands on her hips as she did so:

-“Well, maybe we don’t, fine. But it’s not a magic problem. It’s a Time Piece one,” she remarked, raising an eyebrow at his answer.

The shade felt anger coming back to him and he took a deep breath to not lose his calm:

-“I don’t care what the cause is. All I care about is to reverse this, one way or another,” he replied darkly, slowly articulating each syllable to make his point, as clear as possible. He was sick of being in this useless meaty body and the sooner he reversed all of this, the better.

Not wasting any more time, he finally opened the book and flipped a few pages, irritably, skimming them as fast as he could. He didn’t really know how much time they had left before another subconite ran into them…And, frankly, Snatcher didn’t want to explain everything again. His eyes glanced at the words, searching for anything related to Time Pieces. In front of him, the kids and the subconite apparently had decided to help and they had sat on the ground, each taking a book to read. Well, at least, it would make things go faster. Well, he hoped so. He knew the kids could read his contracts, since they had scribbled on his last one, so they weren’t completely useless.

A few minutes passed in deafening silence, only interrupted by the sounds of pages being flipped and by the sound of the wind going through the living room. The air was cold and dry, which wasn’t reassuring Snatcher very much: it already showed that the effects of his powers over his part of the forest were decreasing. He wondered how many hours it would take for Vanessa to notice it and send a blizzard to them… He could only hope for Vanessa to be too busy doing whatever she did in that freezing manor of hers.

Time went on and Snatcher’s pessimistic nature grew more and more as he couldn’t find anything that could potentially help him. He sometimes stopped the others in their reading to ask if they had found anything, to which they only shook their head, more and more concerned with time. The ghost was becoming fidgety and his anxiety was growing faster and faster.

Why couldn’t he find anything? Why?

He gritted his teeth once again and, on the verge of a nervous breakdown, he threw the book he was holding outside, not caring what would happen to it. He had had enough of this. He just wanted to be a ghost again! He put his head into his hands, ignoring the looks he was getting from the rest of the group. It wasn’t like he could just commit suicide to get back to his old spectral form. If he ever did that, he would probably come back as a dweller and that would be even worse than being stuck as a human… At least, he still had a body.

-“I don’t want to stay like this…” he murmured, feeling his nails scratching his head, sending even more unwanted sensations to him. Without thinking, he let out a scream of frustration, which echoed all around him. He then slammed his fists on the armrests, before quickly regretting it, as more pain erupted from the sudden contact. He held back a cry and clenched his jaw.

When he reopened his eyes, the group was still staring at him, more than concerned. The kids were looking at him with sympathy in their eyes, which made Snatcher’s new stomach turn. Ugh, he hated that look. His minion, on the other hand, was doing his best to stay impassive, surely knowing he didn’t like being pitied. The latter came closer and put their small hands on the left armrest, trying to be encouraging:

-“It’s alright, Boss, we’ll find a way to turn you back to normal! I’m sure there are plenty of ways to do so! Right, kids?” they made a discreet gesture to the children, inciting them to agree. The little girls didn’t understand right away and tilted their head in confusion. The subconite’s body language started to show his irritation and they quickly pointed to Snatcher silently, oblivious to the fact that the ghost could see him very well. Soon enough, a look of realization crossed the children’s features and the bow wearing kid tried to make up for their previous lack of understanding:

-“Oh, uh, yeah, totally!” she said with a fake enthusiastic tone. She elbowed her older friend when the latter didn’t say anything to encourage Snatcher: “Right, Hat?” But, instead of trying to do so, the older child shook her head slowly, a dark and sad expression on her face:

-“I prefer being honest… The only way to fix a Time Piece problem is to break another one.”

The group turned to her, watching her intensely. Snatcher’s desperate expression was replaced by a mix of astonishment and anger. Why didn’t she say so earlier?! That would have prevented them from walking all over there! Why didn’t they just smashed the Time Piece again to fix the problem if it was so easy?

The kid apparently guessed what he was thinking and cut him short before he was even able to say anything:

-“But… It wouldn’t work in your case,” she said, anticipating his interrogations as she explained more: “Because if you broke it again, you would just… Get younger. You wouldn’t go back to being dead.”

She paused, ignoring the reprimanding look given by her younger friend and the subconite, and eventually concluded, sadly:

-“I’m… I’m really sorry, Snatcher.”

The ghost felt like all of his hopes had been shattered to nothing. His denial had been destroyed, forcing him to accept the fact that he was stuck in this horrible and awful body. He lowered his head, gritting his teeth: he didn’t want to accept that! This wasn’t fair! He didn’t deserve all of this!

He was about to retort something when the bow-wearing brat spoke again, interrupting the tensed atmosphere around them:

-“We haven’t tried anything yet, though,” she remarked.

-“But you know just like me that-” tried to interject the other little girl, only to be cut short by her younger friend:

-“No, Hat, actually, we don’t know anything!” she exclaimed, lifting her arms as she kept going, trying to be positive: “I’m sure there is a way to reverse this! We just have to try!”

The hatted-brat winced and glanced elsewhere, not wishing to contradict her friend. But it was easy to see that she didn’t believe her from her expression. As for Snatcher, he didn’t really know what to do or what to think. After what he had heard from the older girl, he was just devastated.

How would he even protect Subcon from Vanessa in his position? He didn’t have any powers to do so! Once his ex found out about what happened… No, he didn’t even want to imagine it. He closed his eyes, not wanting to believe this was happening. But this was all very much real, to his greatest despair.

His minion interrupted his thoughts, tapping on the armrest several times to catch his attention:

-“Uh, Boss?”

-“What?” replied Snatcher, his voice full of exasperation, hiding the misery he was feeling, not wanting to show any more of it.

-“You, uh… I think you should take a look outside,” advised the subconite with a clear anxious tone. This fact immediately worried the shade, who opened his eyes again, turning his head to the side. His eyes widened as soon as he did and, suddenly, all of his muscles grew cold.

A large group of subconites had gathered around the tree, watching them with great confusion. A deafening silence settled between them, as no one knew how to react.

This was a huge catastrophe.

One of the minions made a few steps, tilting his head as they spoke:

-“… Boss?”

Things couldn’t get any worse now, could they?

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Hehehe, I wonder how Snatcher is going to deal with this :)

=> Chapter 04

#A Hat In Time #ahit #hat kid #bow kid #snatcher #subconite #being human #BH #fanfiction #not my art #doodledrawsthings #cheesytrishy #oth #oh the humanity au

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leahxx129 · 5 years ago

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The Last Descendant (Sam Winchester x Reader) pt.5/Final Chapter

Disclaimer: Tumblr is being weird again so if you’re using the app, the ‘Keep Reading’ cut off line may not be visible inspite of the fact that I always insert one.

Hi everyone! I originally planned on posting this on Friday but your girl is a busy bee and had some personal stuff to take care of. Nonetheless, I hope you enjoy the final part to this story, I had lots of fun writing it.

Summary to pt.5: You’ve managed to win a battle against Michael in the woods, but the war is not over just yet. He’s powerful - more than anyone you’ve ever encountered - but you also have some aces up your sleeve.

Warnings: slight cursing, character death

Word count: 2.140-ish

PART 1. PART 2. PART 3. PART 4.

As the angels have disappeared, the force holding you flat against the trees dissipates, causing you all to fall to your knees. The first thing you realize when you get up is that there’s only three of you left – Kaia’s taken off without prior notice. Your blood runs cold for a minute but then you find the spear in the tall grass where you threw it. Sam makes sure everyone is well enough to travel and following Jody’s suggestion, you drive to her place.

It’s already dark when you pull up in her driveway. Neither you nor Sam have said a single word throughout the ride and as the engine dies, you feel an urge to change this.

“Sam...” you put a hand on his thigh “I’m gonna do everything I can in order to replicate the spear and we’ll get him back, okay? I promise.”

He puts his large one over yours and squeezes it.

“I know, Y/N. Now, let’s get inside and take a look at your wound.”

The interior of Jody’s house reminds you of your childhood home, and a sense of nostalgia washes over you, mixed with hope that one day even you can have something like this. Maybe with Sam. Who knows?

“Alright, the guest room is ready.” Jody informs you, pulling you out of your thoughts. “A bathroom opens directly from it, clean towels can be found in the cabinet. And if you’re hungry there’s food in the fridge, knock yourself out.”

“Thanks, Jody.”

“As for you, Sam, I’m sorry, but I don’t have any more guest rooms, so you’re stuck with the couch.” she pouts.

“It’s okay, uhm, we’re kind of used to sleeping together.” Sam flashes an awkward smile.

Jody appears startled for a second but soon regaines composure.

“In that case, excuse me for a second. I need to prepare another set of pillows in the guest room.”

When everything’s all set you decide to scrub off the combination of dirt, blood and sweat that’s defiling your body. Usually you shower with an almost boiling hot water, but this time you must settle for medium temperature as the scars and bruises don’t really appreciate the heat. You nearly punch Sam in the face when he pulls the floral shower curtain open, but realizing it’s him, you’re able to stop yourself in time.

“God, Sam, do not do that again! I ain’t the screaming kind of scared, I’m the might-break-your-nose kind of scared.”

“Noted!” he smiles, stepping into the bathtub.

You don’t question what he’s doing in there with you. Maybe for the first time ever in your life, you let someone else take control of a situation, and to much of your surprise, you discover it’s not that bad. He gently cleanses every inch of your body, with special attention to the scars.

“You know, I really think your shoulder could use a couple of stitches.” he whispers. You can hear a little worry in his tone.

“Nah, I’ve had worse I didn’t patch up and I’m still around.” you reply, swiping aside a wet strand of hair that was sticking to his forehead and you kiss him softly.

When you’re all finished, you dress up in the clothes Jody left you on the foot of the bed and pick up the spear from the corner of the room.

“Whoah, what are you doing?” Sam asks incredulously.

“Well, what does it look like I’m doing?” he opens his mouth to speak but you continue “You know what, don’t answer that. I’m gonna go to the garage and try to replicate this.”

“No, you’re not. Look, sweetheart, let’s be sensible here. You haven’t slept in a long time and I can assure you that the world’s not gonna end in those few hours when you do. I talked to Cas and he was able to track down Michael in Missouri. If anything happens, we’ll know firsthand. You need to be strong both mentally and phyisically to do what you’re about to… you know I’m right, so don’t fight it!” he delivers a lecture while taking the weapon out of your hand.

You pull a face but give in to his reasoning anyway. This time you manage to get three full hours of sleep before the nightmares start tainting your subconscious. Terrifying images you haven’t seen in a long time flood your mind, and you successfully wake the whole house up with your screams. You can hear Sam’s soothing vocie and Jody’s nervous inquiries about your well-being before you fully come around.

“I’m…I’m alright. I’m fine, really.” you stutter unconvincingly while running a hand through your hair. “Uhm, Jody?”

“Yeah?”

“Could you please show me your garage? I’ll collect the tools from Sam’s car and get right down to work.”

The weapon contains an ancient magic you’ve never encountered before, or even anything similar to it. The runes carved into the shaft belong to a language uknown to you, making your job all the more difficult. Nevertheless, you try your best, as always. First, you recreate the shape of the spear and its head, then join the two together. Replicating the runes requires the most time – you only realize just how much when the first lights of morning illuminate the garage and Sam brings you breakfast. You take a few bites of your toast and drink your coffee in one gulp.

“Okay, so here goes everything…” you mutter as you begin performing a spell, which should transfer some of the magic from the original weapon into the replica. The incantation you recite next supposedly enhances the transferred magic.

“It looks like the same to me.” Sam states when you show them your work.

“Yeah, and it also possesses that creepy vibe the original one does.” Jody nods in agreement.

“Good. Hopefully, it’ll work just as well, too. Let’s visit Missouri and kick some archangel ass, shall we?” you propose.

You must give it to Michael – he has exceptionally good taste. Both the exterior and interior of the building he chose as temporary residence radiates elegance. You meet up with Cas and a boy in the underground parking lot. You furrow your brows.

“Who’s the kid?” you glance between Sam and the angel, the latter moving infront of the boy as you speak.

“Uhm, his name is Jack. Also, he happens to be the son of satan.” Cas replies.

Out of reflex, you touch the side of your overknee boots looking for your knife but ease off almost immediately and extend an arm towards the boy. Cas eyes you with suspicion.

“Don’t worry, Castiel, I’m not gonna attcak him.”

He seems hesitant but eventually steps aside, allowing you to shake Jack’s hand.

“I’m Y/N. Y/N Colt.”

His eyes widen.

“Colt? Are you related to Samuel Colt?” your nod sends him over the edge “Oh, wow! This is soo cool! I’m Jack! You must have some awesome stories to tell! When this is over, could you tell me all of them?”

“I’d absolutely love to, Jack!” you smile at his child-like enthusiasm, doubting that a sweet kid like him could be related to the Devil himself.

“Alright, I think we should go over the plan one more time.” Sam changes the subject.

You talk everything over one last time - including the intel on the monsters Sam got from a friend named Garth - and enter the elevator that takes you to the top floor. You feel like the tension could be cut with a knife.

An empty, silent hall welcomes you as you exit.

“Michael is the only one I can sense.” Cas whispers.

“I’m not sure if that’s a good thing.” you whisper back.

You all take feather light steps until you reach a double-winged door and Cas nods, confirming the archangel’s location. Sam kicks in the door in a blink of an eye. A well-dressed Michael is staring out the window, holding a glass of some probably expensive booze.

“Welcome!” he greets, turning to your direction. “Well, well, well… what do we have here? The Three Muskateers? If so, I have to admit, Y/N, you are the loveliest d’Artagnan I have ever laid my eyes upon.”

“Oh my God, just cut the crap or else I’m gonna vomit!” the words slip out before you could think them through.

As a result, Michael’s face hardens even more and he extends an arm in the height where your neck would be, casting an invisible force that pulls you straight into his grip.

Sam yells out your name in desperation.

“Oh, don’t worry, Samuel. I am not going to snap her pretty little neck. Although, my fingers may leave a bruise.” Michael exclaims innocently then averts his gaze back to you.

You find it hard not to try stripping his fingers from your neck with both hands, but there’s no other way. One hand is on his but with the other one you sign three behind your back – the catcher singal for a slider in baseball. Sam catches on, takes the spear out of Castiel’s trenchcoat and throws it to you. But before you could sink the tip in Michael’s body, he snatches the weapon and breaks it in half with one hand.

“Did you honestly believe it was going to be that easy to take me down?” he asks with utter disbelief. “The way you underestimate me is quite offensive.”

“Let her go, Michael.” Jack speaks up.

“I don’t think so, child. In fact, here’s what’s going to happen!” he looks right into your eyes “I am going to kill all of them – in which order, that’s your call – and then I will release my monster army on this city with you by my side. I think this vessel is handsome enough, you’ll grow used to him, darling.”

“Yeah, he may be handsome… but I kinda have a thing for his brother, asshole!”

Before he can react, you stab him in the chest with the knife from your boots. He looks down at the shaft smiling but it soon fades into an expression of sheer panic. He lets go of you and tries to pull the weapon out.

“Did you honestly believe we didn’t have a plan B? The way you underestimate us is quite offensive...” you retort.

“What’s happening?! I demand to know!” he bellows, confused.

“I upgraded my favorite blade a little. Now it has the magic of the spear from that other dimension, too. You like it?”

He screams out in agony while his whole body is lighting up with a blue-ish white blaze. You take a couple of steps back and bump into Sam, who envelopes you in a shielding embrace. Cas and Jack try to cover their eyes as the brightness has risen to an extent that’s almost blinding. Michael’s shrieking finally dies out with a huge energy explosion that busts out all the windows in the suite.

He is gone and the only thing he left behind is a very much so bleeding Dean Winchester on the floor.

Dean is slowly opening his eyes. The fluorescent neon lights, the white walls and the beeping of machines tip him off regarding his whereabouts – he’s in a hospital. He tries to rip the needle out of his arm, but Sam prevents him from doing so.

“Hey, no! Stop!”

“Sam? Wha- what happened? Where am I?”

“Uhm, long story short, Y/N killed Michael and injured you in the process, so you are in a private clinic in Missouri.”

“Private clinic? You know damn well we can’t afford that stuff!”

“You may not be able to, but I can.” you appear in the door with two cups of coffee, one of which you hand to Sam while sitting down on a chair next to him.

“Uhm, we appreciate the offer, really, but we can’t accept it.” Dean says in protest without a beat.

“Hey… I almost killed you, I believe this is the least I can do.”

There’s a stare-down between the brothers and Dean’s the one to break the connection first.

“Alright, thank you.” he mumbles eventually, then checks his bandage by looking down the inside of his hospital robe.

“Uhm, question. Based on the place of the wound, how am I not dead right now?”

“Well, I know how to stab someone without killing them... Which is probably the weirdest thing I’ve ever said to anyone, so let’s pretend it never left my mouth, please.”

Both men chuckle lightly, and you feel a little heat rise to your cheeks.

“Hot, feisty and funny? Sam, you better not mess this up or I’ll snatch her right out of your hands.” Dean comments jokingly and this time, it’s your turn to laugh and Sam’s to blush.

“Don’t worry about that, Dean…” he intertwines his fingers with yours “I won’t. I kinda have a thing for her…”

#sam winchester x reader #Sam Winchester #reader #sam x reader #SPN #spnfic #supernatural #fanfic #series #final chapter

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geminimoonbeamx · 6 years ago

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Home, Again: Chapter One

A/N: Soooo, if you know me at all you know that thick Bucky is my religion and I love him with all of my heart. These new pictures of Sebastian on the set of ‘Devil All The Time’ have got me twisted. Literally I’ve been fawning over them for days. That man is too much for me and my libido and this is the product of that.

Word Count: 2k+

Rating: This particular chapter is pretty mild, lots of cursing mostly- the next chapter, and the ones to come after that will be extremely explicit though so get your bodies ready.

Summary: Moving back home was never in her itinerary, but after the loss of a family member and being fired from her job, she finds herself back in the town she grew up in and face to face with the man who’d haunted her teenage wet dreams. Now in her early twenties, maybe she can do something to make those dreams a reality.

A Plus Size Reader x Dad!Cop!Thick!Bucky Barnes story

It’s a surreal moment for you- waking up in your old room. The one that you’d grown up in, that you hadn't spent more than a couple nights at a time in- in the last six years.

Like some weird, out of body experience. Looking at the ceiling through blurry, sleep bogged eyes, with the sun shining clear and bright through the curtains fills your stomach with nostalgia that makes you feel like you might barf.

You sit up, trudge to the bathroom, half feeling like you’re about to get ready for school or something- about to but on your Volleyball uniform or something.

While you're brushing your teeth you can't manage to drag your eyes away from your reflection. The bags under your eyes, that are ever present, seem to be deeper. Probably from all the moving you’d done in the past couple of days.

Picking up your entire life, and moving it from Brooklyn all the way back to Springs Port had not been easy.

Luckily your friends had been game for the three hour drive, and the little bit of heavy lifting(Pietro and Quill we’re life savers) when it came to your bed and room furniture. You’d sold your couches and tables. You didn't have your own place anymore, didn't know when you would again and since you we’re currently unemployed, you could use all of the extra cash that you could get.

That was you:

Living back at home. Job less. And broke- because you used that almost all of that furniture money to rent the U-Haul.

In that moment, with those harsh truths, you can't manage to look at your reflection anymore.

After taking a shower and getting ready- contouring and highlighting and concealing all of your self hate away, you do feel a bit better. It was a coping mechanism, yes. But You needed to be presentable anyways, you think.

You’re fine. You are fine, Y/N. Everything’s fine.

If you keep repeating it, and accept it as your reality, you’ll feel better, right?

You linger on that thought as you eat breakfast, which is a definite perk of being back home. Your grandmother stands near the stove- a pan hot and the kitchen full of the delectable smells of not only the omelets she was stirring up, but the crock pot that had who knows what already brewing.

Also, the ever present, and pungent herby smell of marijuana that followed her ever since her accident undercurrents that.

It sure beat the instant oatmeal you used to eat mornings back in the city.

“That smells so ridiculously good” You start as you slide onto one of the chairs at the kitchen bar “Also, good morning, Grams”

“Good morning, baby bird. You’re up early” She comments, as she gives you a knowing side eye “Or did you not sleep at all last night?”

There's honestly no use lying to her. She’d always had this sixth sense when it came to that- it had made your childhood a bitch.

“I slept. A little bit” you defend yourself, pouring yourself the cucumber orange juice she’d made. Sounds weird- is actually extremely refreshing. She likes to make weird concoctions with the fruits and vegetables she grows in her garden.

You get another one of those all knowing looks.

“Okay I didn't sleep as much as I could have, but I was just getting everything else unpacked. I’m finally done” you punctuate with an innocent shrug.

“You unpacked all those boxes? Y/N Y/M/N, there was about twenty of them. You’re not supposed to get unpacked in 24 hours, you need to give yourself time to process this change in your life. I really thought that indica was going to help. You should’a been knocked on your ass” She tells you as she plates up your food and sets it in front of you.

You thank her, and bite your tongue about the whole “processing” thing. She’d been all about that lately- since Grandma Vee died a few months ago and she’d started her group therapies; she’d become some kind of self made, self help guru.

You figure it’s better that then her falling apart.

You’re all kind of waiting for her to fall apart.

“I was thinking i’d go into town and job hunt today” You bring up the topic softly, both of you most of the way through your spinach, bacon, mushroom and goat cheese omelet.

She tutts at you, of course she does.

“I invited you to come back and live with me, I’m not expecting you to pay for anything, you know that” You love the way she words it. You wonder if she really thinks of it that way, that you’re here for her benefit and not the other way around.

“Grams, I get that I really do. But I have like fifteen bucks to my name right now. Even if it’s just something part time, I need to work” You tell her, in complete seriousness.

You’d had a job, steadily, since you were fourteen years old and the broke bitch life wasn’t for you.

She fussed, tells you that you that she is very capable of helping you with whatever you need. Promptly informs you that Grandma Vee’s life insurance will hold both of you down for a long while.

You don’t get how she can talk about her death so easily. Calm and level headed. It’s still that iron hot pain that comes from losing a loved one that burns for you. You’d felt it before and yet it didn’t dull one bit this time around.

“Yeah, that’s gonna be a fuck no from me. You have to use that money for you, grams. You know she’d want you to” is your blunt reply and she chuckles and throws her napkin at you as you stand.

“You watch your language in my fucking house, girl. You’ve always had such a bad potty mouth”

It’s inherited, you don’t tell her.

With a few more words of dissuasion from her and a kiss on the head and the reassurance that you’d still help her with her garden, even if you were working from you, you grab your keys and walk out into the already hot, New Jersey air.

It’s summer, mid June and Spring Port is and has always been a resort town. Sea side and picturesque- people flood in during the summer season.

It doesn’t surprise you that the towns square is currently a tourist trap and that parking is hard as shit to find. No matter, you find a space eventually.

Your turquoise Jeep Wrangler is the same one you’d driven before college, that you hadn't taken to the city with you. It has some issues sometimes- the starters a little finicky and has to be worked on every six months or so, but it honestly still runs like a charm. Can get you from A to B just fine now, and you guess it is way better than subways and busses.

You end up walking around the entire towns square, and you’re glad you’d gone with slides instead of wedges. Everyone seems to be hiring, tourist season and all. And in the end you fill out four applications- handwritten at that which you think is a little funny.

It’s not that Springs Port is tiny really- with a population of 12, 000, there are definitely smaller places. Towns square is actually pretty decently sized- about twenty five or so tiny stores and restaurants scattered along main street. There’s a theater. Three gas stations. You guys don't have a Walmart in the towns perimeters technically- but there's one just a few miles away. And everything's waterfront, the docs a skip away. The Atlantic a continual backdrop.

Compared to New York though, it’s a blip on the map,. It feels smaller to you now that you’ve lived in the big wide world.

You’re walking down the cross of Harbor and Main- on your way to Goodies- which you hear Angie now owns, to meet Wanda and B for lunch when your feet get stuck where you are.

Frozen on the spot.

As you look at the flower shop, that’s overflowing with greenery across the street.

Infinity Flowers-

You can't help the draw to the store. Your feet seem to have a mind of their own- and you end up inside before you can really think of it.

Hell, it smells just like it used to. You haven't stepped foot in here since…

It’s pretty busy in the shop- it always was though. Best flower arrangements in the whole Garden state was it’s slogan, and it only exaggerated a little.

“I’ll be with you in one sec- Oh! Y/N” The bleach blond head that belongs to none other then Mantis bobs as she comes over and envelops you in a tight hug “I heard you we’re back in town! I was wondering when you we’re going to come in. I haven't seen you in so, so long”

She says all of this without letting you go and you chuckle and endure it because this was Mantis. Always such a hugger.

“Yeah, I was just job hunting in town and I thought I’d stop by”

“So you’re back for good then, yes?” She asks, after letting you go. Going to greet another customer warmly, while still managing to small talk to you. She’d always been good at making people feel at ease.

You tell her not really, just for the moment, as you fix the hydrangeas in the window display. They have them all wrong-

“Those we’re always her favorite” Mantis tells you what you already know and you nod and swallow the bit of sadness that bubbles up.

This. Is why you tend to stay away from this store. Thoughts of your late mother assault your psyche here, always- but also...you can't help but feel like you’re supposed to be here. Some of your happiest childhood memories we’re in this shop, surrounded by flowers. You can recall the sound of your mother’s laughter best here…

You leave the shop, after you’ve filled out an application.

You don't know why you did it but-

“I’m pretty sure I just got a job at Infinity Flowers” You inform Wanda and B, who are already sat at a booth in the little pub waiting for you when you get there. Sharon couldn't get a break from the station to come, but you couldn't hate her for it. She was just living her dream.

“Really?” Wanda asks, attempting to choose her words wisely “That's- I would never expect for that to be where you’d decide to work”

“What she means; is do you think that’s a good idea? There’s ghosts for you in there girly” B, Brunhilde(she’d kill anyone who used her full name though) has always been the bolder one in your group of friends. And that would never change.

“Mmm, I don't know what I think. Wanna day drink about it?” You suggest with a shrug as you go to wave down a waitress. One of their house made hard lemonades we’re sounding real good right now…

“Bitch, some of us have to go back to work” Wanda argues while B excitedly agrees, telling you that she’s already started.

Two and a half house lemonades later you are sufficiently buzzed and feeling better. Wanda has to get back to work at the antiques gift shop though, you you leave Angie a hefty tip(or rather your employed friends do) and head out.

It’s hot as hell, honestly and you think you might go sit on the beach for a while until you sober up enough to drive- you’re telling your friends that when you see a patrol car roll up to the bakery on the corner.

Out of the driver's seat exits one Bucky Barnes. AKA your teenage wet dream.

And holy god, does he look good. He’s flanked by a tall dark skinned man who you don't recognize, but who is also pretty damn fine.

You know you’re ogling, and your friends are laughing at you and taunting you, but in that moment you really don't care.

“Hot damn, he is still so fine, oh my god” You groan and Wanda chuckles as she lights up a cigarette.

“Yeah? The dad bod doing it for you?” She questions on an exhale of smoke.

“Totally. Is it possible that he got even more attractive? Like? How? And why did Sharon not tell me about this” You try to pull your eyes away from him, you really do.

But you’re a little drunk and the feelings you’d harbored for the older man come trickling back. Yeah, he’s gained some weight. Is broader- his shoulders big. His whole frame hulking. But he still has that swoon worthy dark hair, and that jawline you could see even from here. You wonder if his eyes we’re still that stormy blue color that you’d spent literal years dreaming about...You desperately wish you could go up and take a closer look.

“He’s really been hitting those doughnuts since the divorce, huh?” B snarks and you turn a cold glare at her.

“Don't body shame him. That’s disgusting” You snap and she holds up a hand.

“Jesus, you know I’m just kidding. I forgot how fucking touchy you are about him” She defends herself and you try not to go on a rant about how talking about anyone's body, male female or anyone in between.

You end up doing it anyway and the whole time Wanda grins and tells you how much she’s missed you, and B tells you how much of a sensitive cunt you are.

All in all, it’s good to be home. Even if you are a total failure of a human being at the moment, your brain can't help but tac on to the end. As you watch the police cruiser pull out of the parking lot, and think about the man that sits inside- you think about the fact that you aren't sixteen anymore. And he’s not married...

And in that moment- you realize just how good it is to be home.

And there it is. If you'd like to be tagged in future chapters, please let me know! I’m thinking, and have this planned out to be about five chapters. Just a sexy, juicy, emotional quick read. Some Angst ridden smut coming your way!

Also- I appreciate reviews and reblogs more than you could imagine. They are literally fuel for me- so if you can spare some time to give me your opinion, I’d love you forever!

@gifsbysimplysonia @peacefulwriter88 @prettybubblesintheair @lostinthoughtsandfeelings @lostinspace33 @4theluvofall @plumfondler @tatathekissypotato @jaamesbbarnes @jalapenobarnes @siren-kitten-his @brieannakeogh @skishenanigans @paulxrudd

#Bucky Barnes #bucky barnes x plus size reader #Plus size reader #thick bucky #dad bucky #cop bucky #marvel au #cop #marvel #wanda maximoff #brunhilde

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thirstyfortom · 7 years ago

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DRAMA! MORE DRAMA, I say! Lol, because there isn’t enough drama on those fics, right?

Breaking up and bumping to each other months later

Zen

You felt like the only way to know things about him was through the tabloids

He was so caught up in work you were living basically a manager-client relationship rather than soon to be engaged.

So you quit your role as his manager, and as his girlfriend.

Zen wanted to make you think this through and convince you to give him a second chance, but… the new manager that the actors’ agency assigned him booked him for a several gigs out of the country.

So yeah… he just got the whole point of it and realized you might be right, unfortunately.

But he kept hearing about you, yeah, you were blooming as a manager for several artists in the country and he was so proud.

So as a good manager, you were attending at the wedding of this TV star you were working for.

You stayed for the party, but your plan was to stay just a little and then get out. Seeing the happy couple made you think that it could be you and Zen…

“Would you give me the honor of this dance?” you heard a familiar voice whispering in your ear and shivered. After all those months, your body reacted to the very same way when he was around.

“Hyun….? Zen… what are you doing here?” “I got invited too, I worked with her at a musical a few years ago.” “I see…how are you?” “Feeling a little pathetic for attending a wedding by myself, to be honest.” “Tell me about it.”

“I could, or I could dance with you and then we won’t be two alone people at a wedding.” “Then what would we be?”

“A couple trying to start over. So… shall we?” you looked at his hand, then at the beautiful smile you’ve been missing so much… and stood up. “We shall.”

Yoosung

His insecurities turned him into a jealous grumpy dick

You couldn’t stand all his tantrums everytime you were friendly with Zen or even with his best friend Seven.

So you left, saying you were doing this because you loved him and you couldn’t help but think it was your fault he was turning into something so destructive.

He cried, begged for you to stay and give him a second chance, he would even apologize to Zen and Seven, just like he said he would do and never did all the times you fought.

He was becoming destructive, wasn’t he? Yeah, he would never forgive himself if he ever hurt you. And he wouldn’t if you stay away.

The first two months were hell, and it was so hard not to call you or even go to the same places you usually go just so he would pretend to bump into you, because that would be exactly one of the reasons why you left him.

But life goes on. He started dedicating more to college and a few weeks later, even going out with his colleagues.

That night, he went out with Seven and Zen to a karaoke bar, he wasn’t going to sing and felt it was kinda lame to go there, but Zen and Seven coaxed him into going.

And he wanted to kill them when he spotted you walking into the bar with some girlfriends. But… it was so good to see you.

“That’s your chance, dude! Show her how much you’ve changed!” Zen encouraged him. “Yeah, dude! It’s showtime!” Seven beamed and started a chant “Go, Yoosung, go!” quickly, all the bar was singing “Go, Yoosung, go!” the whole bar, including you.

So he went to the stage. “I… uhm… dedicate this song to a very special lady I… love very much. I also dedicate to my good friends who helped me changing to be a better man for her.”

Then it was his time to start a chant of “Go, MC, go!” trying to convince you to sing a duet with him. And so you went. You also went to his place that night.

Jaehee

Honestly, sometimes you would even doubt you were on a relationship

You could see you were business partners and roommates, but lovers? It didn’t look like.

You realized that after telling her you should split the relationship and the partnership up, and the only thing she asked you was “What about the café?”

It would be fine without you, she would be fine without you.

You were half right, the café was fine after a few months, she wasn’t.

But the fear of being rejected kept her refraining from trying to contact you. She overcame so much before, she can overcome a break up… right?

You were at Starbucks with a friend, the place brought you some nostalgia when you remembered you would come here with her and make a very weird name up for them to write and call you.

You smiled, it was the first smile you let out that it didn’t feel fake for months.

So you decided to play this little game once more.

“Miss Piggy!” the barista calls, and you mindlessly reach for your cup, only to feel another hand holding it.

You look to find her staring at you. “J-Jaehee, hi!” “You must be mistaking me from someone else, I’m Miss Piggy, see?” you both chuckle, and just by that simple phrase you notice a glimpse of the playful sweet Jaehee you fell in love with.

“Ah yes… I’m sorry, Miss Piggy.” She laughs, ahh, you missed that laugh… “Can I make it up to you with a Muppets movie marathon at my place?”

Jumin

You tried to be patient, but he could be… pushy.

He wanted you to move in with him, you weren’t exactly comfortable with the idea yet, so he would get passive aggressive and make you feel bad, even when you knew you were right for not rushing things.

You loved him, so it hurt to give him an ultimatum, and it hurt even more when he ignored it, saying he wasn’t going to stop taking this relationship seriously.

So you left, because you clearly had different points of view on what “taking seriously” means.

He pretended he was fine, and he was pretty convincing, Years of pretending everything is fine made him an expert.

But he wasn’t, and Elizabeth was dealing with a very clingy owner for the last few months.

Being a cat mom, he knew cats demand their own space, but he was so afraid of losing her like he lost you…

Being a cat, she didn’t know any of this, so running away was her first instinct. He was desperate when noticed she was gone, this was too much, he lost the loves of his life and he was the one to blame!

Jumin was freaking out when he got a call from you. “Jumin… why is Elizabeth standin at my door?”

Ah yes… your apartment, the one you didn’t want to move out from not even after he insisted a lot and made a whole scene, questioning you if you weren’t taking the engagement seriously. God… he was acting so pushy, right? “It seems like she remembered the way. She likes in here.” “Well, yeah, it’s a nice place.”

“Of course it is, you live in here, I would run to where you are at anytime like she did.” Was this… an apology on Jumin Han style? “Well, yeah, so… why don’t you come in?”

Saeyoung

Guess what? He started pushing you away again.

His brother was having episodes, he was feeling guilty and taking it out on you, just like he promised he wouldn’t do ever again.

And you wanted to stay and help, but what do you do when someone doesn’t want your help? Worse, when someone calls your attempts of helping “useless”?

Since it was useless, he wouldn’t miss you.

And he pretended he wasn’t, but even his brother noticed how the atmosphere in the bunker was way less lighter without you around.

Saeran was missing the brother he got used to see when he was with you, and Saeyoung was desperately missing you.

But how many times will you guys do this? No, at one point you’ll get tired of taking him back, so… he’ll save the trouble and not look for you, because he knows you will forgive him. And he doesn’t deserve your forgiveness, he doesn’t deserve you.

Time has passed, Saeran got a little better and could stay alone in the house while Saeyoung would take his babies on a drive. He was basically obsessed over the babies ever since… you know.

He was so distracted, thinking about… you know, when he felt a crash, he hit on somebody’s car. “Shit! I’m sorry, I…” “Saeyoung?” you asked when he got out of the car. Oh… he hit your car.

“I called the tow truck, they will take some time to come.” He explained after talking on the phone. “Ahh, great! Like this day couldn’t be any more perfect!” you groaned in sarcasm.

“Why? What happened?” he asks, you scoff “Like if you cared.” He grabs your hand and looks at you “I care so much about you you wouldn’t even imagine.” So you guys start talking, you vent, then he vents and opens up, like you always wanted him to.

“So is your brother better now? Are you sure it’s fine to leave him alone?” “I texted him I was going to get late and that I met you, he replied: ‘Go for it or I’ll punch you’ so… yep, he’s fine.” Well, you’ll go for it you definitely don’t want him to get punched…

#mystic messenger #mystic messenger headcanons #mystic messenger hcs #mystic messenger zen #hyun ryu #yoosung kim #jaehee kang #jumin han #saeyoung choi

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bolbianddolanhouse · 4 years ago

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BNHA self insert AU [Book 3]

New? Read here! Then here!

Chapter 7: America Explain! What Do You Mean ArkanSAW?!

I wake up sorta later than I would on a Sunday, it was just past 12pm. I see Tensei’s side of the room empty, assuming he got up way earlier. Not much chatter from downstairs, it sounds more like my parents talking on the phone but having two separate conversations. By the time I got dressed, mom wasn’t downstairs anymore.

“Oh you’re up!” Dad greeted me “I have your food freshly made right here.”

I sit as he hands me the plate of food “Where’s mom? I thought I heard her talking on the phone?”

“She was down here but she hopped over to next door to Jin’s house” He responded as he pours my coffee “She’ll be back in an hour or so.”

“What happened that’s making her overwork like this?” I asked with concern to really voice how worried I am.

Dad placed my cup down and sat next to me “I’m not going to lie to you Iwata, there’s a rise of super villains” he took off his glasses to wipe them “These villains are the same ones from my time at UA.”

That shocked me “They would have to be significantly aged if they were from your time!”

“That’s the weird part, they aren’t” Dad said solemnly “So your mother thinks this is the missing part to a cold case she’s been hacking away since she started at the branch she currently works at.”

“Wow, she works fast” I was in awe “Whats so bad about them?”

“They’re the reason students in the hero and Intel program have to stay in dorms” sighed the man “It was awful to have to fight them, feeling unsafe and knowing the full extent of the corrupt system. I wasn’t ready to be fighting like that but your mom and her intel friends were! She’d be in the front lines and single handedly save us all, but of course we’re talking about your mom” he nervously chuckled “She’d get angry at us for not being careful enough to stay out of danger.”

That gave me an idea for a later time “Was that when you fell in love with her?” I teased.

“No, I fell in love with your mom way before that” Dad had that day-dream look to him “I had feelings for her before the sports festival, I didn’t know that’s how you felt when you have a crush so I didn’t know how to express myself when she was around. What solidified my love for her was when she shared her most well kept secret, we shared trust and I was honored that she shared something like that.” He sighed lovingly “I ran home that day to Tensei to tell him that I’m pretty sure I met my wife, and he just laughed at me. Until I started to write and revise confession letter after confession letter, he gave me some advice.”

“What was the advice” I was being nosey like I don’t know the outcome.

“Just tell her before it was too late” he admitted “But the words couldn’t come out! I’d act foolish and mix up my words, to which your mom would politely laugh at and change the subject to relieve my embarrassment. I’d spend too much time thinking of some grand gesture to get her to say yes to consider me as a love.” a chuckle broke out of his mouth “But it was so simple, just some time alone and a ‘I love you, be mine’. Her heart was already mine to take and I waited too long.”

“Bet you made up for it when you proposed” I said with a mouthful of food, too invested to swallow it.

“Nope, I on impulse took her to the McDonalds drive thru. Then ate the food in the car at the peer over” He turned red remembering that night “The moonlight hit her just right and I just, held her hand and asked her to marry me. No ring, no plan...just my love in it’s purest form. She said yes and we worked things out from there, everyone was so excited that we were finally going to get married! We were one of the last ones in our group of friends to get married.”

“She must really love you to say yes without a ring!” I was taken back “Wish I could find someone like that.”

Dad gave me a look “You’re not dating Beizu?”

“What? NO!” I couldn’t believe what this mans just said “What makes you think I am?”

“How close you two are and how you two cuddle” he commented “I don’t have a problem with you dating him, love is love and I accept you no matter what.”

“I’m glad you don’t have a problem with me being gay but I’m not dating Beizu” is today even real?! “We’re just friends.”

“I said the same thing when I was in high school” he stood up to leave the table “But whatever you say Iwata, I’ll leave you to your food.”

That ruined my appetite a bit. Beizu and I?! He’s my friend! I just said I’d be in poly-partnership if we liked the same person and the other person was conflicted. I’ll start dating when I’m good and ready! I absolutely refuse to be like my parent’s love story where they were in denial for too long. If I was in love, I’d make it obvious and tell the person right away.

The portal appearing in the living room distracted me from my fuming. Out hopped my mom with an armful of files, she looked a little strung out on something.

“Mom?” I said standing up, letting her know I was there.

“Hm? Oh Iwata!” she said with a hoarseness to match her appearance “You’re up, how did you sleep?”

“I’m fine but you look like you need to sleep!” I exclaimed “deadass mom, go to sleep.”

“I’m fine! I just need-” she caught a glimpse of herself in the living room mirror “Oh eww I look like Mr Aizawa” she gagged as she ran her finger over her under eye bags, then sighed in defeat “I’ll take this L, time for a deep sleep.”

I eye the thickness of the files “What happened? I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this overworked since the incident.”

She looked at me and sighed again “Lets just say, you’ll need to get your pencil out in homeroom to rearrange things in the syllabus come Monday.”

I watched her walk up the stairs with my eyes widened. What a power move she pulled on me...GOD I love her!

-Monday, in homeroom-

SHA-BLAM, SHA-BLOP! Whatever happened on Saturday night was so fucked that our dorm move in got moved to this weekend. Like, how fucked up is that?! On top of that, our licensing got moved to the week of my birthday...So that means I have to train more with both classes and learn both program’s protocols! Never have I wanted to ascend so much in my life....well, except for that one time I panic zooted straight into the podium at 1st year band camp. I’m never gonna live that shit down, no cap.

“Before I continue” Hansai sensei added “who doesn’t mind sharing a dorm? ASIDE FROM IIDA AND HATSUNE?!”

Beizu and I slowly lowered our arms in response. We were so ready to jump at the opportunity that I guess it was predictable that we’d share a dorm.

“Wait sensei” I raised my hand “not to derail what about our display of skills?”

“Still going on at the scheduled date” sensei responded “be thankful that it’s staying that way, we can’t send any of you out to agencies without all the up coming lessons.” He puts down his file down, sighs and hops onto his desk to sit “I’m going to be vulnerable for a moment. This repeat of the past makes me scared for the future of our students. I wasn’t ready to fight or protect my fellow student, I knew I wasn’t strong enough and some of you might be feeling the same way. I get it! What moved me was the leadership of these three very talented agents in my class. Their chemistry and ‘nothing to lose’ mentality inspired me to rise up and try” his face was full of nostalgia and hope “I stopped doubting myself and became a leader alongside them. Ready to fight and knew exactly what to do at the drop of danger. Whatever may come, repeat of the past or not, some of you might find yourself rising up as a leader. Some might uncover a new ability, unexpected dynamics will form or a brave soul will make the ultimate sacrifice for the safety of the team. It’s up to you in the moment.”

That struck the reality of the situation into me. Who will I be in the face of danger? I’m pretty sure he was talking about my mom, aunty Mimi and uncle Jin but....I’m nothing like them. I can’t live up to my mom’s bravery or genius level thinking, then does that make me the sacrifice?

“Hey you good?” whispered Beizu.

“Yeah why?” I dismissed my anxiety.

He pointed behind me “That doesn’t look like you’re good.”

I looked behind me to see that I levitated everything in the room that wasn’t bolted down “OH SHIT, my bad!” I set everything and everything down in panic.

“Sensei may I take them out the room to calm them down?” Beizu said standing up.

“Permission granted, take as much time as you need.”

“Thank you” Beizu bowed, then grabbed my wrist.

I was too embarrassed to protest in front of everyone. Once we were out of earshot, I spoke up “I’m fine, really!”

“Stop lying, I know you subconsciously telekinetically float things” Beizu said without stopping “especially right before an anxiety attack.”

“Well can you loosen your death grip?!” I begged, losing feeling in my hand.

“Oh sorry” he loosened his grip and came to a stop “This seems like a good spot.”

I look where he led us “The old workshops?”

“Hardly anybody comes in here” Beizu opened the door and flipped on the light “I come here to work on the device sometimes.”

I sat in a beat up, but comfortable looking, desk chair “I didn’t know these rooms were unlocked.”

“Just this one isn’t” he responded as he pulled an identical chair next to me “But tell me, what’s up? You were cool a few minutes ago.”

I trembled a bit and tucked my legs up to make myself small “I’m scared for the fight we have to potentially fight. I don’t want to die, I don’t want anyone to die.”

Beizu leaned back into his chair “I thought that might of been it” he sighed “I’m scared too but I’m inspired to fight.”

“Why? You’ve never fought anyone in self-defense!”

“It’s not that, I’m inspired by sensei’s little moment” he defended “if he realized this and lived to tell the tale. I want to live to tell the tale too!” Beizu sat up and faced me “I want to live and fight alongside you. You’re my day one, my ride or die, my stars to my universe.”

I chortle “That was just a Steven Universe reference!” we made eye contact “If you put it like that, then I feel a little better.”

“Lets not think about that fight that may or may not happen” Beizu changed the subject “When we dorm, wanna turn it into a fort palace?!”

“Suddenly I have to buy 20 more pillows” I perked up on the idea of a dorm room sized pillow fort. He always knows what to say...so grateful he’s my friend.

-Later that day, in the hero class-

There was also uproar in this class but Mineta sensei didn’t have the same level of control as Hansai sensei.

“...and here is our protocols Iida-kun.” Sensei hands me a thick booklet “Back in my day, it wasn’t this thick! Your mom had a hand at editing and readjusting the school’s protocols at your age.”

I wince at the tiny text upon opening to the first page “Whoopie, another thing my mom did that I have to do now” I said very flat and unenthusiastically “Why can’t I just be like my dad and just be ignored?”

“That’s not true! Your dad was our class rep, we listened to him sometimes” sensei said to try to comfort me.

“My mommy said she had to constantly rescue your bitch-ass during crisis” I sassed back “and that she’d yell at the class if you listened to my dad, everyone would’ve been okay and she didn’t have to come down to scold everyone.”

The entire class was shocked at my sass and turned to look at sensei for his response.

“Well...it’s true BUT! Things were different” sensei clarified “She was an agent, best in her class, and she was our part time classmate. Just like what Iida-kun is doing.”

“Wait- who’s your mom?” asked Kage-san “It sounds like she met your dad in this class and might be on the notable alumni wall.”

“I literally look like her” I sighed as I put the booklet in my backpack “She’s CEO of RoboDog INC.”

“Yup, she’s also one of the biggest donors and advocates for UA” beamed sensei “You can thank his Mom for the botanical gardens, comprehensive sex ed and hero school extracurriculars.”

I chuckled nervously “Lili was responsible for the last one, mom just convinced the board to approve it.”

“BRO! Your mom is one of the most powerful women in the country!” hollered Gon “My big sis went to college because your mom is a big role model for her! I didn’t know she had kids?!”

The rest of the class was even more intrigued and swarmed me about being born into two wealthy families. It just made me realize that they don’t get it, nothing was handed to me as a child just because I was son of two famous figures. I had to work hard to get here just like them, plus with the added pressure everyone has on you to be a good sibling and student. I hate being put in this hole that I clearly don’t fit into! This sucks!

I tried to escape as quickly as possible after class, to avoid anybody asking me more questions. Didn’t work as well as I thought it was because the guy that doesn’t like me caught me.

“Oh hey, how are you-”

“Shut up” snapped the guy “You know, I hated you before but now I absolutely hate you! I looked up to your mom and her success. She had nothing and worked hard to get to where she is now” he looked intensely into my eyes “I came to UA because of her origin story, I want to help other displaced heroes too! My dream is to build an agency that will benefit them. But to think she birthed you” he spat “A weak, disrespectful, ungrateful son! Riding on the success and wealth of your parents, when your mother worked herself to death to have what she has today.”

He was getting me fumed “You don’t understand how things are! She’s not my free ticket here, I worked my way in here like you! And I’d never disrespect my mom!”

“Oh yeah?! Seems to me that you can’t decide which program to be in!” He snarled at me “Afraid to disappoint her? Some of us don’t have the privilege you know! But let me do her a favor” he raised a hand “let me erase this pest from her life!”

The hand coming down toward my face triggered me that I stopped him before he could touch me. As he struggled to move his arm, something else in me snapped and I released an energy from my brain that pushed him back a good 10 feet. He released his quirk on me and I couldn’t fully process what was happening, my head felt like it was in fog. I didn’t notice how I got home, but I woke up in my bed. Checked the time and it was a little past dinner time! I changed out of my uniform and ran down the stairs to see who was still downstairs.

“Oh you woke up! I was just about to check on you” Mom said, sitting at the table “come and eat, I bet you have a lot to tell me.”

I sat at my usual spot “Um, yea” I gave a long, tired sigh “Mom...was it always this hard to be an agent?”

“Yes, it was” she answered “I know you probably want me to say that it gets better or a trick that helped me. But I’m going to keep it real chief, it sucked ass!” She levitated the pitcher of lemonade to serve me “On top of not wanting to be there, I was a target in the hero course for basically all 3 years.”

“Why? You only had one class there?”

“Thats the thing, everyone knew I was just taking one class to better understand hero society. But not everyone agreed with my ‘choice’ to be an agent” she started to clarify “Before Lemillion became the hero he is today, he was a 3rd year when I was in 1st year and he somehow got access to my student file along with his friends. His little group tried to convince me to switch over, but he caught feelings for me and we dated.”

I nearly choked on my food “You dated Hoshi’s dad?!”

Mom blushed really hard “Yeah...not the best choice, I know! But that’s what he did before I snapped at him for assuming that I was hometown hero in America. He apologized later but then broke up with me out of guilt.” she flexed her muscles “Oh but the ass whooping we gave him and his friends really showed him! And at the same time, Mr. Eijiro was sus of me being an undercover villain because of my high skill in everything. He’d be going off on how I behave wishy-washy around certain heroes and how my strategies are solid.” A chuckle left her lips “I mean, he was right to be sus but I wasn’t going to betray the school! I was under different rules and I always be actin’ out. When I protected them against the villain attacks, he later trusted me more and more until we became friends. But how I’d be tip-toeing around the hero wing, hoping nobody would confront me!”

“Why didn’t you just teleport to class?” I said, thinking I was clever.

“Same reason I don’t levitate the fork up to my mouth when I eat” she shaded me “like, yes I can, but why would I if I have a functional arm to feed myself with?”

I looked at my forkful and my arm that I use to hold my fork “Oh, I get it. You conserve your power for training.” I think about my next question “I heard you edited the school’s protocols when you were my age.”

“That I did! Wish there wasn’t so many to remember” she leaned back in her chair “All those all nighters I had to pull to read through and edit with different outcomes. Otherwise a lot of lives would be at stake at that school!”

“Then why make you the editor? Where was the teachers or school board input?”

“They had other things to worry about, but these protocols were for the students to follow. Since the intel students are the front lines in case of the building defenses go down, we have to know who or what can we save/attack.” She paused to remember something “Like I caught on to a contradiction that we could only save individuals that had a hero license for less than 5 months. At the time, only 2 students were in that situation and it wasn’t ideal. The bigger flaw was that it didn’t say anything about gen ed or the business students, so I changed it so nobody is left to fend for themselves if they don’t have a hero license.”

“Wow, I didn’t think about that” I was blown away “You really did think of everything!”

Mom giggled “Oh stop! I just wanted to make things easier to remember for future students.”

I picked at my food for a bit “Were you scared to be fighting a fight that had nothing to do with you?”

“I was always scared, I’m still scared! But my drive to protect my friends overrides everything else I feel in the moment” she took a deep breath “I fought fights that meant life or death, fights that were never supposed to start, and fights that had to happen...but I was never alone. That was the key to victory, being in numbers. Sure I can take on 20 people at a time but imagine the fatigue and that slim chance of them defeating me? Who’s going to help me? And if they’re busy helping me, who’s helping them?” She looked at me with seriousness “Promise me Iwata, you never go off fighting on your own.”

I swallowed my food “Yes, I promise to be rational mom.”

“Good, now onto the other thing I wanted to talk to you about” she changed tone “What are you taking to your dorm? Or do you want to get new sets of things for dorming so you have some at home for home visits?”

“Oh right! That’s this weekend” I remembered “guess I should get myself sorted out.”

Talking to my mom about this put things into perspective, she fought battles that others started and helped to end them. She was just as busy when she was my age and somehow squeezed in normal high school things like dating. Then maybe I can follow her example, to do it for my friends. When I was done eating, I immediately ran to my room to write in my timeline the information my mom told me about her. So that yellow haired boy was Lemillion, and she was tossed into a dorm in the summertime. That’s bringing something together in this mystery...Kinda want to know more about after UA and before I was born. But I guess thats all for another time. I have to sort my sweaters out and pack them up for move in day!

-Friday, during lunch-

“I didn’t want to say this earlier, but you kinda look like that time your head got stuck in the sousaphone and nobody knew until it was showtime” commented Beizu at my appearance “Did you sleep at all the past few days?”

“What chu mean? I feel like lechuga” I mustard the energy to say “Fresh and crunchy as FUCK!”

Beizu rolled his eyes “Right, I’m sure those bags under your blood-shot eyes are just part of the fresh look huh?”

I frame my face with my hands “Thanks for noticing! They’re Gucci!”

Beizu playfully shoved me “Be serious! I’m concerned that you’re being over worked.”

“I am feeling the wear and tear in my brain” I flop over, accepting my new position on the bench “I just wanna sleep in our dorm room size pillow fort already!”

Beizu extended his arms to prop me back up “I know, me too. But please get some sleep tonight.”

I rest my face his hand, closing my eyes for a moment “Wish we could just go back to your birthday and cuddle” I yawned remembering that “It was so nice, the best sleep I had in a long time before everything escalated. Cuddle me again Bei.”

Bei started to get flustered “Well ummm we could...cuddle whenever you want to when we move in.”

“You mean it Bei?!” I said, my eyes still closed “I can’t wait to rest easy every night in the dorms with you” I yawned again “You’re the bestest friend anybody could ask for!”

“Sit up sleepy face!” Beizu laughed and straightened me out “Eat something before you get all whiny after school!”

I somehow made it through the last half of school.....okay it was more like, I tripped on my own feet and sensei told me to sit out the rest of training. I tiredly floated my way to the front of the school to wait for my mom. Before I could get to the main hall, Gon hopped in front of me.

“Iida-kun! Where are you floating to?” Gon yelled.

“Home, I’m getting picked up” I yawned as I floated around him “see you on Saturday.”

Gon followed me “Are you going to be in the hero dorms?”

“Nope, I’m staying in the intel dorms” I yawned even harder “Can’t wait, I’m sharing with my best friend.”

“Does that mean I’ll finally meet them?!” gasped Gon “I have to visit your dorm on move in day!”

I see my dad pull up at the pick up area “Sure, whatever. See you then.” I zoomed toward the car without looking back.

“I got your- Iwata! What happened to you?!” gasped my dad in horror.

“Jeez I know I’m ugly, don’t rub it in!” I joked “I haven’t slept in maybe...2 days?”

“We are going home and getting you straight to bed young man!” Dad scolded me “It’s just like when your mom stayed up for days at a time when we went to school together! Except she had the stamina to pass off as wide awake, you look like you got ran over by a truck on day two of no sleep.”

“What do you mean she did the same?” I fought back a yawn.

“She’d work on so many things without noticing the time, of course I’d make sure she took breaks and ate something” He responded as we drove home “There was this one time she rested her head on my shoulder at lunch, asking me to stay with her as she napped. I never knew why she’d do that or why she trusted me to be the shoulder to nap on, but I’d hold her hand and made sure she was comfortable.”

“Yet you didn’t confess your feelings?” I shaded.

“I couldn’t, I didn’t want her to stop spending time with me if she didn’t have feelings for me. There were so many opportunities to tell her how precious she was to me” Dad sighed “but then I look at her and how peaceful and happy she was to be in my company, and it was enough for me to hold back to preserve that happiness she had.” He stopped at the light “She wasn’t the happiest person, she was always tired and sad under that cool demeanor. She trusted me with those secrets, with her true feelings, and I became her chosen family.”

“What were those secrets?”

“Don’t be nosey! I’m not telling” He chuckled “And don’t go asking your mom either! You’ll just get her mad, trust me.”

Well that just peaked my curiosity! Wonder what things Beizu and I will find at the dorms with the cube? Whatever it is, hopefully it’s not as bad as dad talks it up to be. I’ll just...lay down until I have to move in, good night.

-Chapter 7, End-

#bnha #mha #self insert au #not canon #book 3 chapter 7 #will update regularly #ask me anything #//Palma-sama Speaks #let me preface with an apology...sorry for this being late af! Not to bum anyone out but my dog passed away #He was my baby and it was just his time to go. So I've been mourning for the last week or so with little to no motivation to finish this #No worries as I'm doing better emotionally and mentally with moving on with this tragedy :3 So heres this calm before the storm chapter!#Iwata is starting to feel the pressure to get good and know his place in this fight. Putting together who his mom really is #This dorming arc is very dramatic with some twists...lets just say they find out what happens behind closed doors #Buckle in kids! More soft boys and queer coded cuddling is on the menu! Don't think I'm not cookin in this kitchen!#Thank you for reading! I've been getting alot of good asks and I can't wait for the next few chapters to answer them :3

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neverisalongtime-ja-blog · 7 years ago

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Chapter 42: Album done

I just wanna take a moment to thank everyone for the feedback I’m receiving here and on Instagram.

Anastasia_Truman ❤️️

Thanks again to everyone who reads the fic, much love to you all! ♥

Read chapter 41

- I’m so happy you’re here – Richard told Anastasia during one of his many visits to the recording studio in Las Vegas.

- Do you realize you’ve told me that every single day since last week? – They had already been working there for a week – Not that I’m complaining, say it again – Anastasia said smiling.

- I’m so happy you’re here – This time Richard’s words came along with a small kiss.

- You are very cheesy for a grown-ass man – Mandy said as she sat down in a big couch behind the new couple.

- Look who’s talking? Miss Romanticism – Anastasia told her friend. Eric and Nick were trying new drum beats.

- When are you leaving? - Richard asked.

- In a couple of days – Anastasia answered – I’m not going far though. We are going to keep recording at Rancho de Luna, have you heard of it?

- Of course, near Joshua Tree. We have recorded there before. It’s an amazing place.

- I should have known because of your love for the desert.

- It’s a Vegas thing. You guys are pretty much done! – He said referring to the album.

- Yeah, we want Josh to just have to adjust things here and there when he comes.

- Josh? – Richard asked.

- Klinghoffer, he is co-producing the album – Mandy answered this time.

- Guess I won’t be visiting you at the Rancho then.

- Why? – Anastasia asked, surprised.

- He clearly doesn’t like me – Mandy and Anastasia looked at each other – Last time we met, in Chicago, he wasn’t the nicest guy.

- Well, Josh is a little weird like that – Mandy said – Don’t take it personal. Tour had us all angry by that point.

- Yeah, I understand. I was thinking – He looked at Anastasia – That maybe you’ll want to come to have lunch with Elijah and me tomorrow.

- Are you serious? – Anastasia was in shock. Meeting his son wasn’t something to take lightly.

- Yeah. He really wants to meet you.

- But Richard… I mean, I would love to! But he is your son. You can’t just introduce any girl to him like that – She said.

- But you are not any girl, you are my girlfriend – Anastasia’s and Mandy’s eyes opened like plates, he never called her like that before, he didn’t even asked her. He didn’t need to, for her was kind of tacit. A big smile appeared in her face and her eyes shone.

- Well, as I said I would love to, boyfriend – She answered and Richard gave her a big kiss, a kiss that made Mandy uncomfortable.

- Get a room! – She said laughing.

- I’ve been watching you kiss Peyton for seven years, deal with having to watch Richard kiss me – Anastasia said, laughing.

- I have to go. I promised Elijah I’d take him to the movies – Richard said – I’m going to say goodbye to Nick and Eric.

- I can’t fucking believe this – Mandy was still laughing while Richard was inside the recording boot.

- Did you hear that? – Anastasia said to her friend – I am Richard Austin’s motherfucking girlfriend! I must have done something amazing in life to deserve this – Anastasia walked towards Mandy and took her friend by the arms – He is Richard fucking Austin! – She said shaking her friend but stopped when Richard came back to the room.

- I love you. See you tomorrow – He took her by her waist and gave her another kiss – Bye Mandy!

- Bye Richard! Have fun at the movies – He disappeared behind the door – Let me tell you something – Mandy said to Anastasia – You’ve been through such a rough path in love, you fucking deserve this. You deserve someone that treats you right and gives you nothing but love and that person is Richard. Life is always surprising us, darling. Take him; take this because you have been so patient in this disastrous love life that the Universe has put you through. I can’t assure you that Richard is the man of your life but he respect you and love you endlessly, I can see that – By this point tears were running down Anastasia’s face – And always remember this, Jesus did not die for you to be a sidechick – Now Anastasia was laughing with tears on her eyes.

- Why are you making An cry? – Eric asked entering the room.

- Because she is just the sweetest friend anybody could ask for – Anastasia went to hug her friend in the couch.

- Richard officialized all this shit and called her his girlfriend today – Mandy told Nick and Eric.

- What?! – Nick said smiling – That’s amazing!

- Poor Josh – Eric said as a joke.

- Stop pulling the Josh card – Anastasia said – He couldn’t decide if he wanted to be with me or not and Richard is offering me something strong and real.

- We should celebrate! – Nick talked again.

- But I can’t stay up until late; I’m going to have lunch with Richard and his son tomorrow.

It’s almost as if Anastasia said “let’s stay up until late” instead. The foursome enjoyed a wild night of alcohol and clubs in Las Vegas and now her head was going to explode. She called room service for some pills and lots of water and did her best to hide the tiredness of her face with makeup. She let her hair down, put on a black Rolling Stones t-shirt, checkered gray pants and black vans, and big dark sunglasses to top it all.

Elijah was a sweet blonde kid, wearing glasses and a Foo Fighters tee. The first thing he told her was how much he liked her band.

- He is into loud rock right now, the Foos are the band of this week but it changes… a lot – Richard said and Elijah smiled – We are going to a place called Cantina Laredo because food choices change every week too and right now Mexican is the favorite – Anastasia was inside Richard’s SUV while Elijah was in the backseat asking her a bunch of music questions to her.

- So, are you going to be a musician when you grow up? – Anastasia asked Elijah while they were eating at the restaurant.

- Yeap! Like daddy – Eliajh answered.

- Would you let him? – This time she asked Richard.

- He can be whatever he wants to be but he must be the best at it.

- You can teach him – Anastasia said.

- Would you help me? – That question took her for surprise. Answering to that was like a long life commitment but something inside of her made her talk without thinking.

- Of course! – She saw Elijah’s smile again and Richard’s too – This reminds me of when I started asking dad to take me to the studio with him. That was the beginning of the best thing I could find in my life – She looked to Elijah – Music makes everything better, never forget that.

- I won’t – The kid answered.

For some reason that situation, being there with Richard and his son, didn’t feel weird to her. It actually made her realize that she wanted that, she wanted something to hold on to, a family, a strong bond, a stable love and maybe Richard was the one who would give her all that. She felt calm in that moment and she didn’t have any doubts about anything.

Richard was such a good father, always answering his son’s questions and helping him do mundane things. They went to a kid’s indoor playground after lunch and she had a lot of fun playing with Elijah. She was already trained for that, she took care of the twins with Barbara while Justin was nowhere to be seen, so being with kids wasn’t a strange ground for her. They ended the day at Richard’s house, which was beautiful, really well kept for a single man. He had a dog, a small dark French bulldog called Pete, and that was the main reason for them to be there, so Elijah could play a little with the dog.

She helped Richard cook dinner, and even though the panorama was unusual for somebody like Anastasia, she felt like she could fit perfectly in such lifestyle.

ooo

Anastasia and Mandy were driving to Rancho de Luna for the first day of recording sessions with Josh. An was nervous, she hadn’t seen him or even spoken to him since the past month, this was weird but she trusted Eric when he said that Josh wanted to do this.

As soon as they parked, An saw his car and a bunch of memories of her inside that car filled her mind and nostalgia made act of presence.

- Josh’s here – Anastasia said.

- How do you know? – Mandy asked.

- That’s his car.

- Oh, right! – Mandy said realizing how stupid she was – I have an idea! Let’s break the ice with a little joke.

- One of your jokes?

- Yeah! Let’s make him laugh so he forgets you ditched him.

- I didn’t ditch him! He just didn’t make up his mind!

- I was joking!

- I hate your jokes.

They entered the place and there he was, sitting in front of the console, with his headphones on, fiddling on his laptop.

- Thank the Lord you are here! I have a terrible dilemma – Mandy asked Josh and he smiled taking his headphones off – Listen, the meal that joins breakfast and lunch is called brunch, but how would you call the meal that joins lunch and dinner? “Diunch” or “Lunchnner”? – Josh looked so confused by Mandy but he decided to go along with her question.

- What about “early dinner”?

- But how do you know it’s not a “late lunch”?

- Well… In that case, “lunchnner” sounds better.

- Thank you Josh, this is why you are here, you have all the answers.

- I wish I did – He said now looking to Anastasia – Hi! – He smiled and she felt guilty for some reason.

- How are you? – She asked.

- Great! Really happy to be here – He said smiling some more – We are waiting for Nick, he’s on his way – Eric was already inside blasting the drums – I have to say that I’ve been listening to what you guys have done and it’s amazing. These are stadium anthems. Pure rock. I love it. How was Vegas?

- Amazing. Inspiring – She didn’t need to say more. Josh smiled and put his headphones back on.

The relationship between Josh and Anastasia was polite but not extremely friendly during the recording process. Josh had brought a lot of British bands to the table that definitely inspired the sound Dead Curse wanted to portray. An saw him happy, relaxed, music had an amazing effect on him as on her, and that environment helped them get along again, but the relationship, for sure, wasn’t what it was before.

The place also helped Josh get loose. He was a desert fan too and Joshua Tree was one of his favorite places in the world. He, Anastasia, Nick and Eric would go hiking in the mornings, then Josh would take them to places to eat and served as a tourist guide, not that any of them needed it, they all knew the area pretty well, but Josh was happy doing it and everybody just let him be.

At nighttime, they would record and produce and that was when everybody was at their happiest moment. Making music was something they all like to do and every song they made sounded stronger than the last one, so the excitement was in the air and the musical self-esteem was high, really high. By the end of that week the album was completely done and the smiles on everyone’s faces were big.

- I can’t thank you enough for doing this – Anastasia told Josh one afternoon while she was playing with the guitar he gave to her on her birthday inside the recording boot.

- Don’t worry! I’m glad I decided to do it – Josh told her, while sitting on one of Nick’s amplifiers.

- This place is great for recording! – She was trying to find any topic of conversation.

- Yeah. How was the Las Vegas place? – He asked.

- It was cool, small, warm, it actually has great technology. Elton John recorded there.

- Cool! It’s weird I never heard of it before.

- Actually it was Richard the one who told me about it.

- Oh… right – Josh lowered his voice. Things started to get weird.

- How’s Lauren? – For some reason that question popped in her brain and her mouth spit it without permission. He seemed shocked but answered anyway.

- Fine. She is releasing her album real soon, around October – He said. That let An know he and Lauren were still an item.

- Oh! We are planning to release the album on October 31st.

- Your favorite day of the year – He smiled.

- You know how much I love Halloween – She smiled too and he stared at her, like he didn’t want to forget her smile.

If things weren’t strange enough at that point, everything was about to go to hell when a familiar face appeared behind the crystal that separated the control room from the recording boot. It was Richard. Josh’s attitude took a 180° turn, his expression went blank and the air got heavy. Richard entered the place smiling and Anastasia smiled back, he was wearing a blue short-sleeved shirt with white stars and a pair of jeans that fitted him perfectly, black boots gave the final touch to such sleek look.

- I wanted to surprise you – Richard said after giving Anastasia a big kiss on her lips.

- You sure did! – She answered awkwardly – You remember Josh, right?

- Hey, man! – Richard said.

- How are you? – Josh was showing himself much more polite this time.

- Great and you?

- Good, having fun making an amazing record.

- Yes, what I heard in Las Vegas was magnificent, can’t wait to hear it all.

- It’s gonna knock you out – Josh said with half a smile – I’ll leave you two alone, I’m going out with Nick and Eric.

- Alright – Anastasia said and watched him walking out – Why do you look so hot? – Anastasia asked Richard, he laughed.

- I want to look good for you.

- You are doing a great job.

- You look amazing too.

- I’m wearing an oversized Dodgers sweater and Vans, no makeup and my hair is a mess.

- If I say you look good you take it and don’t say a word back – He put a finger in her lips and for some reason she thought that was incredible sexy – Do you wanna go out for dinner tonight?

- Yes, but first let’s go to the house we rented here near so I can change, I’m not going out looking like this, at least a little bit of mascara I need.

They shared another kiss and joined the rest of the gang at the control room.

- We are going out tonight to celebrate finishing this record – Mandy told Anastasia and Richard.

- We already make plans for dinner – Anastasia answered.

- But we’ll join later – Richard told Anastasia.

- Yeah… ok – She said looking at Mandy.

Josh didn’t stop lookng at Anastasia the entire time they were there, so she hurried up in getting out and going to the house so she could change clothes. She put on a pair of black jeans with a mustard knit sweater and a pair of black ankle boots. Her blue hair was loose and her makeup minimum, she wasn’t great at makeup actually, that was Mandy’s thing.

- Now you look even more beautiful – Richard said when he saw her.

- Oh, stop it! – Richard hugged her tightly without noticing and she felt his warmth, his endearment. That man loved her; there was no doubt about it.

They ended up going to a place called Pie For The People that served New York Style pizza, “To remember our first date in New York”, as Richard said. Anastasia still had trouble finding this situation realistic, he was still Richard Austin, a face that used to be up a wall in her room back in the mid-2000s. And that day, in particular, she was having trouble understanding Josh’s attitude, he acted so polite and decent. She was glad, but she knew he was keeping some feelings and that always make her uncomfortable.

After dinner, they joined the rest of the group at Joshua Tree Salon, a nice pub downtown and she was amazed by how Josh was loosely talking with everyone, included Richard, and acting so relaxed.

- Glad you came! - Mandy said - We ordered some food but I guess you two already ate.

- You know? - Josh looked at Mandy – It’s not a “lunchnner” if is this late – They both laughed. Anastasia was happy that he was slowly turning back in the Josh she knew.

Definitely, producing the record had something to do with that. Anastasia also realized that having Josh around woke up some feelings she wanted to keep locked inside, after all it was Richard the one sleeping next to her that night in the house they rented at Joshua Tree.

#Josh Klinghoffer #JoshKlinghoffer #Josh Klinghoffer Fanfic #Josh Klinghoffer Fanfiction #Josh Klinghoffer Fan fic #Josh Klinghoffer Fan fiction #Klinghoffer #JoshAn #Never Is A Long Time #NeverIsALongTime #fanfic #fanfiction #Fan fic #Fan fiction

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bthenoise · 5 years ago

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Q&A: Aaron Gillespie Details The Almost’s Epic Return To Rock Music With First New Album In Six Years

It’s been 6 years, 4 months and 7 days since we’ve heard a new full-length album from The Almost. Thankfully, for all of us desperately awaiting a follow up to 2013′s Fear Inside Our Bones, that’s all about to change.

Hitting stores and streaming services this morning, mastermind Aaron Gillespie has released a brand new album of open-minded, honest rock anthems fueled by his need for getting things off his chest.

“I think the best records come when you feel like you have something to say,” explains Gillespie, “and I just felt like I had something to say. So I started writing songs and I don't think I initially planned for it to be an Almost record or anything. Sometimes you just therapeutically or cathartically write songs, you know?”

Detailing more about his new Joshua Tree-influenced record Fear Caller, Gillespie told The Noise he was a little unsure about how many Almost fans were interested in hearing a new album.

“You know, you go to these Emo Nite things and you're the old guy. Then you go on tour with Korn and Alice in Chains like we did this summer and we're the babies. So I feel like I'm in this weird limbo as a musician, a public musician if you will, where it's like, ‘Is anyone even going to remember this?’ So it was a really pleasant surprise to have people that are, like, stoked.”

To read more from the multi-talented musician, including the wild story behind Fear Caller’s artwork as well as the choice to cover U2′s “In God’s Country,” be sure to look below. Afterward, make sure to grab a copy of Fear Caller and pick up tickets to see The Almost out on tour as they plan to play 2008′s Southern Weather in full.

At what point did you know you wanted to write another Almost record?

AARON GILLESPIE: I don't know that I did. I think the best records come when you feel like you have something to say and I just felt like I had something to say. So I started writing songs and I don't think I initially planned for it to be an Almost record or anything. Sometimes you just therapeutically or cathartically write songs, you know? We were home for a couple of months with Underoath and I was just going to my studio every day and writing a song. I do that for other people and for "work stuff” but I was like, recording these songs and I was just going every day and writing and I think probably five or six songs in I was like, “I should make an Almost record.” And then I did the whole battle where you're like, "What makes this an Almost record versus something else?" But I always loved the vibe of that band and what it stood for and so we just made the record and it kind of just happened. I made it in six days in a house in the desert. It's a really kind of thrown together thing. I feel good about it though. I feel like the songs are pretty revealing for me. And I didn't do the whole, "I'm trying to make this type of song or that." I just kind of diarrhea-mouthed those songs out and I think that's why they feel the way that they do. So I'm pretty excited about it.

When you released “Chokehold” as your first new Almost single, was the reception what you were anticipating?

I mean, more than I thought. You know, you go to these Emo Nite things and you're the old guy. Then you go on tour with Korn and Alice in Chains like we did this summer and we're the babies. So I feel like I'm in this weird limbo as a musician, a public musician if you will, where it's like, "Is anyone even going to remember this?" So it was a really pleasant surprise to have people that are, like, stoked. So I don't know, in 2019 it's hard to know what success means musically. And for me, it always just meant people singing along and getting something out of it. So I think [the album will] do that, but you don't know untill it comes out. People have loved the first three singles, I don't know how many [people] or how they remember it, but I'm stoked.

youtube

Talking about Emo Nite and all of the nostalgia The Almost represents for some people, on your upcoming tour, you'll be playing Southern Weather in full...

We might skip a song or two but we'll play 99% of it.

Who's going to play with you for those shows as far as your band goes?

A bunch of guys that actually work for Underoath. Our production manager is going to play drums. He's a hell of a drummer. My drum tech is going to play bass. And then I have a friend from Florida who's playing guitar. We're just doing a four-piece band this time not a five-piece band.

You've covered some classic rock/folk-type stuff in the past playing Tom Petty and artists like that. Are you planning to keep that going for this tour?

I don't really make setlists. For The Almost tour, we have a setlist now because I haven't played some of the songs in 10 years so you kind of have to. I haven't done any preparation yet but the other guys needed prep time. Other than that, I just fly. I'm one of those people that's like overly musically spontaneous. I'll hear something one day and I'm like, "I gotta figure that out" and I'll play it the next night. I guess for me, that's the outlet of what I get to do with my own stuff. With Underoath, there's a production. It's not calculated, but it's planned.

Similar to when Underoath came back and played They're Only Chasing Safety and Define The Great Line, what has it been like for you personally to go back and revisit these Southern Weather songs?

Oh, it's funny because you're 23 and you're like, "What the hell?" Like, "Is that really how I felt about that?" I think the same thing all the time with Underoath though. When we did that tour playing They're Only Chasing Safety, I was like, "Oh my gosh." You know, you're 21 and you're like, "What am I even talking about?" You know, because it's things that you've already worked through and you've already figured out and you're over it. But you go back and sing it and to some people, you know, it’s still where they are. It still matters. So I think that’s what gives you the juice to do it as other people are still there. They're younger than you or they're older than you but they're still there. And that helps you sort of take ownership of it again.

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The desert is a very big theme with Fear Caller. You went out to Joshua Tree to record it. Were there any spiritual experiences that Joshua Tree brought for this recording?

It's weird when you go somewhere like that. I went there years ago for vacation, like I just love the desert. I live in Utah on five acres out in the dirt and it's something that I like. And I had never been to Palm Springs or Joshua Tree and we actually went to Palm Springs to like a Hard Rock. I have a friend who is a talent manager for a Hard Rock. It's not there anymore. It's called something else but he still works there. But he had me and Spencer [Chamberlain] out to do some like commercial drops for him and then just gave us the penthouse for a week. And I was like, “This is really cool. I've [already] been in Palm Springs, it's hot as shit. I want to see some stuff though.” So we got in a car and someone drove us out Joshua Tree and I had never been there. [Immeditely,] I was like, "This is my place, man. This is it." So I knew that I wanted to keep going back there and I knew that I wanted to make music there.

The thing about the desert is you just you get a sense that it never ends, especially out there. You get a feeling that it's just old. Like the people that lived there and like if you read old Louis L'Amour books -- I'm reading all that cowboys shit, you know. So like, it's super cool to go out there and kind of see it and just weird stuff happens out there. The reason the record is called what it is, the first day I was there (I go running every morning or ride a bike for a long way a couple hours a day) I got up one more morning to go running and there was a giant jackrabbit, like huge, two feet tall, and he just followed me on my route. It didn't spook, it was really strange. And then we got kicked out of the Airbnb for making noise even though they knew what we were doing. This is day one, we recorded the drums and the guitar to one song and I'm like, "Fuck." So we left. We had to pack up and I literally brought in a whole studio. So it took hours. Packed it all out, put it in a van and we were homeless. So everyone back in New York is making phone calls, we found another house and that's where we ended up making the record. But as we got to that house, I set up the vocal mic out of this living room window so I could see everything and there was that fucking rabbit, man. Or one that looked just like it. And every morning, there he was.

Then we went to a bar in this town in Joshua Tree called Pioneertown, it was built in the 50s and 60s by like all the old cowboy movie guys. It's a set to a film for Clint Eastwood movies and stuff and they never tore it down. So hipsters kind of moved in and bought it and made clothing stores and record shops but there's still like no people there. There are no paved roads. And there's this bar that has been there forever. It's called Pappy and Harriet's. It's this famous thing and like live bands play there, semi-recently Paul McCartney showed up and played piano for an hour. Shit like that happens. It's just really weird. So we go there and there's a band playing. I don't remember who it was. And me and Matt [Squire, producer] are just having some drinks in the back and this guy, this like homeless dude, is just in a patio in the back with a rabbit on his head sitting there. So at this point, I'm like, “This is getting weird.” It's constant. I've never seen a jackrabbit out here and I've definitely never had it come this close. So we started looking into it and it's like a Native American totem for anxiety and creativity and it's kind of just who I am. And I see [the rabbit] everywhere now when I'm out in that part of the world, so lots of weird shit happens out there, man.

youtube

Being that writing and recording this album was pretty therapeutic for you, now that it's finished, how do you feel?

I haven't been able to feel any way because I've been so busy. You know that kind of happens in the music world where like, if you're a "professional musician" or whatever the hell that means, you're always doing [something]. Like I'm doing something today that has nothing to do with that. I'm kind of a compartmentalized person where I'm all the way here right now. Or if I'm working on someone else's song, I'm all the way there. So it's been hard. The records comes out [soon] and we don't tour until January, so I'm just sort of just like, I don't know. I don't even know what to think yet.

youtube

What are you most excited for people to hear on the record?

I'm still kind of precious in the sense that I like making whole packages, records as a whole. So I'm excited for people to sit down and listen to the journey of the whole thing. It's not conceptual or anything but I always felt like, in Underoath, we always spent so much time sequencing records and obviously, it's 2019 and we're in the age of Spotify and "tracks" but I'm just excited for people that do listen to the whole thing. I don't know how many people actually do that, but I'm excited for them to do so.

You chose to cover a U2 song from their Joshua Tree album, "In God's Country." It's an interesting choice considering how outspoken you've been about religion lately. What was behind you covering that song?

I mean to clear the slate, I don't have issues with God. I have issues with people. You know, I don't have any issues spiritually. I have issues religiously and socially, but I ain't got no issues spiritually. So I feel like that land and those expansive spaces and just that untouched country, that's God's business. You know, babies are God's business how they're formed in the womb. And for me, it just feels like that. You know, this record feels like it wasn't really my business. Not to say that God made a record but you know, it's not my business. It's God's country, you know?

youtube

#The Almost #Aaron Gillespie #Fear Caller #Underoath #Fearless Records #interview

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whyareyouyellingatme · 7 years ago

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A post I deleted in the end

Here's one of the most personal/long things I've ever posted, and if you hate me you'll probably have a field day laughing at this one. I don't know how long it'll take before I maybe...delete it. I don't want anyone to respond with likes or comments. If you have something to say you can pm me, but I don't enjoy talking about it outside of one ong rant. I rant like this so I can jot it all down for records / evidence I'm not irrational, and then move on.

Here's the TL;DR: Rick Ranquist - 40+ years old, lives in Utah possibly Michael Aigner - mid 20's, probably lives in Bellingham by the pool Cooper Texeira - My age, lives in Seattle and goes to my school

All these men are white sexual offenders that did not get a punishment for their crimes.

When I was seven my 20+ year old babysitter did stuff with me that I did not understand, and I don't properly remember a lot of it. I thought it was a game, but it was actually doing sexual favors for a pedophile. I read a line in "The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe" about a man trying so hard to forget something unpleasant that he eventually succeeds in forgetting it. I tried to do that with the memory, and it sort of worked until I heard his name, Ricky. My brother said, "Remember when Ricky----" and that's all I heard before I started dissociating and everything was like someone was smothering me with a pillow.

His sister called me a liar when I said "your brother does weird stuff with me and plays games I don't understand". I decided if she didn't believe me, nobody would, because she was my neighbor and my friend. She still doesn't know today I was telling the truth.

I got raped when I was 19 by a 23 year old that had been grooming me since I was 16. I tried reporting it to the police and they laughed at me, nearly hanging up on me. I went to the ER, got a cervical exam while a doctor ogled my vagina with awe (because my relatively young genitals excited him, how professional). The taxi driver saw me crying and said "you put him on a list! Get him on a list!" and nope, he didn't get put on any kind of list. That fucked me up for a long time. I was numb for a long time. I just watched non stop television and didn't think. I can remember the exact outfit I put in a brown paper evidence bag, and I can remember the exact outfit I wore for days afterwards. I really changed as a person after that. Being isolated from all your friends and spending 3 years dedicating all your time to a shitty abusive man that made you think everything was your fault. Not fun.

Weirdly enough, a man who's in my family pushed me not to report the rape or try pushing for anything else from the police, because he thought it would traumatize me further. I gave up. I didn't want to see Michael, he made me sick. I was partially relieved I got out of the cycle of abuse, but I held on to a rage for a while . I still feel it if I think too much about it. I get really angry but it helps nothing because what can I do ? I'd imagine scenarios where I got to kill him as revenge.

It looked really cute on the surface! It looked like I was having a good time. But I was having panic attacks every week trying to make him happy, despite the beatings, despite the yelling (bc that's normal in my household so I thought it was normal in relationships) until the day that he went way too far.

I really thought it was my fault and that I deserved it for being stupid or not good enough. I was too focused on a very heavy school schedule and an eating disorder/self harm problem to realize I could do better for myself. Of course all of his friends saw me as a "crazy bitch" as he was beating me, real nice. His family was really racist and he broadcasted all of our arguments to them. His sister threatened to hit me with a wrench, not knowing/caring that her brother was already beating me. All of them just kind of watched whenever I broke down crying in front of them. His dad said "women get like this", I'm not...a woman. Not for someone like you dude.

Michael showed up at my house a couple days after it happened too. He stalked me for a while. I still get freaked out being alone sometimes. I have a knife collection and pepper spray, and even guns, but none of them make me feel as safe as a genuine friend does. I'm easily startled and for a while I had really horrible nightmares and panic attacks in public. It got a little better with time, but I still have really bad days. It's still difficult going anywhere near medical centers or dealing with cervical exams.

(I tried speaking with a nurse about the possibility that I have PTSD from that event, and she brushed me off with a "Women used to get raped all the time and they would have to just deal with it. You should lose some weight." Which started up my eating disorder again...horribly enough, people have been so cruel to me but I still care so much what they think.)

I tried faking confidence and happiness in college. I don't have a supportive healthy family, I just have me and whoever decides to be my friend. I made a friend group and went to parties with them. That was fun until a person I trusted grabbed at me when I was incredibly drunk. He led me to his room where I passed out. I wasn't sober enough to understand what was going on or even walk properly, and he texted people things from my phone saying that I was okay. It was all just kind of stupid honestly.

I woke up the next day in my room, on the floor, feeling kind of gross and even more gross as I try to figure out what happened the night before. He shows up at my work wanting me to serve him ice cream. I go in to report him because he did end up grabbing me without consent.

I lost my friend group. And after describing him grabbing my chest and ass in a disgusting amount of detail to a man that said "I remember being a young man and partying in college" with a cheerful nostalgia, I lost the case too. He didn't get anything. At this point I was kind of used to being treated like a piece of meat, so I was just mad he didn't learn anything. In fact, he has been checking up on me online to find dirt on me and report ME to the school for talking shit. His girlfriend has been doing the same, angry because she thinks he was trying to cheat with me. Cheating is consensual.

People just don't learn sometimes. I'm not a thing. I'm an nb lesbian though, and the guy that tried stuff with me when I was drunk knew that. He thought he could convert me.

I've been going through all of this without therapy, trying to just go to school. I tried telling a counselor about my situation and he said "those are long term problems that the university cannot handle".

Maybe I seem quiet and aloof, maybe I'm annoying to you, maybe you think I'm a liar or something stupid like that. But god damn it, I am a human being. I've been through some gross shit. I'm tired of people touching me and trying to invade my space. I'm tired of creepy ass college professors comparing me to their girlfriends and saying shit like "things aren't going so well with her". It's never a compliment you're just fuckin weird dude.

I'm super disconnected from reality even now (sometimes) because I don't like thinking about any of this. I stayed silent about it for quite a while because of all the people who probably wouldn't believe me. But uhhhh fuck you guys I know who I am.

This is a really personal story, especially very personal to be posting on facebook. It makes me feel super vulnerable, but not as much as having the memories bouncing around in my head nonstop makes me feel. I have a girlfriend now and I'm living in a pretty safe place at the moment. There's a lot of other shit happening in my life, my PTSD dog (one of my only sources of comfort in a bad time) got hit by a car and died. :( You all probs know about that, I just miss her when I think about the past. So I've just been trying to figure out how to help myself, you know?

This post got really fucking long and I don't feel like editing it. If you ever think I'm quiet, it's because I'm tired of explaining myself. I want to be my usual joke-y self but sometimes that feel really fake. I don't like thinking about all of this, but I think someone should know.

I wanted to write this post when I was sure I could finish it without crying. It has been a while since something super bad has happened to me, and that distance between the event and reality really helps muffle the emotional response.

Cheers to the survivors that aren't "good" survivors that react a specific way. Cheers to those of you that aren't comfortable sharing your story because it's really not anybody's business unless you want to say something.

I don't know, I still try and have fun, pretending nothing happened. I hate this crap. I hate the emotional baggage. Wish I could chuck it, but my brain has a different plan.

Like, all of this shit happened on TOP of me living in an extremely abusive home so you can imagine I tried to kill myself.

I'm a human being. Stop treating me like shit. I'm tired of it. I'm also not as mean as I look, I don't bite. I'm here for you as a friend if you need it. I just couldn't sleep tonight because of all this crap.

Please don't react to this I'm just babbling. I don't want to deal with people that have no empathy for my long ass story just because it's long / badly written. I'm just tired. I'm soooooo fucking tired.

Edit: I'm trying to reread this just once, but I can't even do it. Like not because it's hard, I literally just look at the words and they mean nothing. My brain basically put up a firewall against upsetting shit so I lose touch with reality whenever I get near it for too long. It's hard describing dissociation but if you would like to know more u should google it. A weird time. Anyway gn I'm alright I just needed to fucking let it out.

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kindsickness · 7 years ago

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Gimme Nakajima Yuto(oh yes, i need more), Fujita Nana(and make her connected to one of my existent Jurinas.), Im JinAh, Yamamoto Sayaka(because Sayanee is life) and Morimoto Shintaro(i miss this bitch. ;;)

LONG POST AHEAD~

It’s not particularly well written because I’m a little sick, but I hope you’ll enjoy it anyways ;/////;

Name: Wakeshima Kensui.Age: 27Sign: TaurusAffiliation: n/aBiography:

Kensui has always been what you might call your typical, normal, fairly popular guy. He was always part of a fair group of friends, thanks to his open and friendly character, always a good yet not excellent student, he was, in general, your pretty average guy. It all changed once university separated him and his friends because of his choice of studying to become a screenwriter, and inevitably he drifted a little apart from them. It was a new start for him, a fresh start, but it doesn’t matter how many good people he met during his uni years and even later, when he started to work… sometimes nostalgia of those old, good times strikes again.

Headcanons:

Has been really good friend with Takeshi ever since elementary school, and even if they have now really different lives, they’re still in touch.

Even tho he loves is job as a whole, one of his favorite parts is taking parts at panels during conventions and meeting fans, even if sometimes they don’t recognize him.

At the very beginning of his career a picture of him became viral, and he became famous as the “ikemen screenwriter”. It didn’t help his career much, but still felt good.

Name: Sakurada ErenaAge: 18Sign: LibraAffiliation: n/aBiography:

Erena always had a bit of melancholia, in her character. It’s not like she has never been happy -she is, most of the times-… but ever since she was a child, there’s always been a hint of sadness in her eyes. It’s not like her life ever had something to be sad about, she lived a perfectly normal and satisfying life… but it almost seemed like and older spirit lived within her, without her even knowing about it. Is right that sadness in her eyes that made her famous, tho. When she was about 6, 7 years old, completely by chance, a woman working for a discography house saw her while she was out shopping for vegetables with her mother, and got struck by that sadness. Immediately she asked Erena’s mother if she could take a picture of that peculiar child, and in less than a month her eyes were on the cover of albums sold all over Japan. She has been chosen to appear in the music video of that year’s most famous band, as main character of it. Since then, she’s been known for it even if growing up she decided not to become a full time model, nor actress, but to aspire to a more normal life as a student and, in future, hopefully, a doctor.

Headcanons:

Every once in a while she still gets work proposals from model agencies, but she almost always declined them. Only twice in the last 8 years she accepted: to take part of a charity campaign, and for the first TV commercial of her best friend’s family restaurant, since they couldn’t afford any professional actor to star in it.

Holds a personal grudge against Katsumi for breaking the heart of the girl she was in a one-sided love with. Even tho they now attend the same school, and even take the same train home sometimes, she can’t even look at the other’s face without getting angry.

Name

: Ju Sungji

Age

: 24

Sign

: Taurus

Affiliation

: n/a

Biography

Sungji has always been undeniably beautiful, with her exotic look and calm attire. She always struggled to really understand others, maybe because her good looks made people always behave differently than from others. Girls were envious of her, boys lusted over them, no matter how much she turned them down. This lead to be rather cold-looking, but she really has a warm heart and a thoughtful mind.

Headcanons:

Character from the mahwa What does the fox say? I totally didn’t use her to make you go read it I swear

She now works as a office worker in a vdeogames production.

Falling in love for her team manager, she realized the reason she never has been interested in the thousand of guys who tried to hit on her: she likes girls.

Name: Ishida KurumiAge: 23

Sign: Gemini

Affiliation: n/a

Biography:

Even tho Kurumi lives a normal life, and from outside she looks just like any other 23-years-old who just moved to Tokyo alone, she is much more than that. Ever since she was born, she knew things. All sort of things, she just knew them. Even tho she spent her whole high school years trying to understand the cause of this, she never found something. Was she linked to some powerful entity? Was she in contact with the afterworld? Was Kurumi herself not human? She never found an answer to her questions. She just knows that, now, she knows two people living in Tokyo have to meet, and fall in love. It’s their destiny, and if that fate remains unmet… it will be trouble, big trouble. The only problem? She knows nothing of them: no name, no address, no age. Only their faces, and that they live in Tokyo.

Headcanons:

She once tried not to follow this kind of instincts she have, and the consequences were awful.

Because of her power she often ends up doing weird things, things that seems illogical to normal people, which made her be known as “the weirdo” in her hometown.

She’s really really attached to her munchkin cat, Sir Ian McKitten, and she kept him with her when she moved to Tokyo. He’s for sure not the smartest cat, but she loves him deeply.

Name: Asakura RyosukeAge: 26Sign: LeoAffiliation: n/aBiography:

Former yankee, Ryosuke is now a young and energetic middle school teacher. His dream is to become a great teacher, and help his students bring out the best of themselves, aspire them to live their lives at the fullest and enjoy them. He himself used to keep a lifestyle that, on the long run, would have given him nothing but troubles and door closed right on his face, chances missed because of stupid behaviors. Right as his old homeroom teacher helped him make his life satisfactory, he wants to help others.

Headcanons:

Decided to teach in a middle school after meeting the daughter of her mom’s best friend. She was clearly affected by the chuunibyou, also called “2nd year middle school syndrome”.

He still looks like a yankee, so it was really hard for him at first to find a school open to hire him.

Says to be engaged to keep her young students to develop crushes on him. It would make him majorly uncomfortable to have girls that young trying to flirt with him.

#;ooc #nakamatsuyama

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weaselbeaselpants · 8 years ago

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Tim Burton and race: A critical approach by a life long white fan-girl

This is an old thing I wrote back in October back when Burton made some not so sensitive comments about diversity. It’s been lying in my box forever and though times have already changed so much since Halloween, I think my argument deserves to at least be shared. If you have anything to add or talk about it with me, feel free to talk to me in my inbox or message me with your thoughts.

--------------------------------------- From October 2016, three weeks before Doomsday or so

For those who don’t know, Burton basically said in an interview about Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children, that he gets angry at people trying to “force” diversity into his casts. The only black guy in sight of his new film is Samuel L. Jackson…as a villain. Combined that with his comments about how he thought Brady Bunch was offensive for it’s “PC thing” and “they don’t force white ppl in blaxploitation movies dur it’s fair”, and let’s just say people aren’t happy with him...Burton being such a big artistic force in the goth fandom it reinstates a problem I see a lot with goth-subculture and that’s a lack of recognition to the gothic people of color. Even though I’ve met black Goths, Hispanic Goths, Indian Goths, Asian Goths and so on who love the same things I do, they’re never portrayed in the media as much as the practically undead zombie girls like Lydia Deetz (and yes I know that pale skin is kind of a character design thing rather than exclusion, but you know what I mean). Goth and horror are a sort of unifying subculture. Death and uncomfortable subject matter is present in every culture and spoken in every language. It connects us all, from wanting to share that cultural significance with the rest of the world, to simply giving people who don’t have that much of an ethnic or cultural identity a place to be with others like you. Simply put: it’s a subculture.

So there’s the fact that not wanted to be more inclusive is troublesome but I think it can be argued with. Timmy isn’t a studio, he’s a man. He can make a movie about whoever he wants. As a feminist I’m actually kinda impressed by how well he can direct movies about women and just female characters in general.

However, Burton hasn’t always had the best track record of diverse roles. If his casts aren’t 90% wonderbread, he has this really bad 80s habit of shockingly blunt racism in an otherwise modern and progressive film.

There have been moments where he proved this wrong, such as in Mars Attacks

his really old Hansel and Gretel film

and Batman

but then there’s this scene which I always found uncomfortable in Beetlejuice

this line from The Melancholy Death of Oyster Boy

And most potently of all, as it is one of my favorite Tim Burton movies, Toshiaki from Frankenweenie:

Burton’s assertion is that diverse casts are not always necessary for whatever film he was making, especially when they’re period pieces. But let’s be real here, aside from Corpse Bride and Sweeney Todd, when has a Tim Burton film ever harkened to one specific part of the world or culture? Pretty much never, so his argument, which amounts to the tired “forced diversity” excuse, is really weak.

And yet, I don’t think Burton is trying to be offensive or is truly hateful in anyway. If you ask me, he needs to realize that his vision isn’t just his anymore.

What I mean is, I wouldn’t call Tim a racist in the sense that he actively hates anyone. I’m saying that if he is racist, it’s because he doesn’t understand the issue with diversity. Burton unknowingly does write with a culture in mind, and that culture is the one he grew up in: Middle-class white Suburbia where people were shallow and toxic to things outside of the norm.

Burton’s best films always feel like they’re written from the heart. That’s because he understands what he’s a fanboy of and knows how to put it in his words. If there is one unfortunate trait Burton has laying around from his life in Burbank, it’s that as forward thinking as he may want to be or thinks he is, he doesn’t understand what it means to be a non-white person dealing with his problems. He doesn’t understand why it’s a big deal because race seems not to matter to him personally, so the all-white-casting getting called out doesn’t seem so much like a concern but more of a nitpick to him.

And again, the man makes movies based on the stuff which influenced him as a kid. Those movies were not dark fantasy novels or children’s books (which is one reason for why I have such a problem with people handing him those movies because his name is on Nightmare Before Christmas). Burton grew up on old horror/B-movies dating back to the 20s. These were movies that were entirely based on mood and emotion, not really on logic, and you see that carry into his own work a lot.

I don’t wanna dig back into 90s Tim Burton to find any evidence when for all I know, he’s probably changed his opinion, but if his weird intro to “House of Wax” is any indicator I think he idolizes these movies way too much. He sees the best parts of them and wants to make his own films like that, without questioning all the implications behind his favorite films that he never thought about because he wasn’t one the receiving end of a joke.

This relates back to Frankenweenie and my honest to god theory as to why Toshiaki��is Toshiaki.

Toshiaki feels like he wasn’t supposed to be offensive but is because of what role he served for the story. The kids in Victor’s class are parodies of horror movie staples. Nassor is a parody of Boris Karloff cause his pet is a mummy and the same logic is applied to Toshiaki: He’s the kid who brings back a Kaiju, so he’s Japanese and has the hokey mannerisms associated with the bad Godzilla dubs from the 50s-70s. Problem is the roles these background characters fill is still an antagonistic role to our main character, or at least an obstacle. Add that Toshiaki’s accent, attitude, intelligence, perfectionism and you got a prime example of what were you thinking? Unlike Oogie Boogie, which I truly think was unintentional, this choice in writing and voice acting was bad and should have been thought over more.

Besides his whiteness and age, I think there’s another explanation for his narrow-minded view. And it’s the thing that’s made a lot of Socially-impaired kids love Tim Burton stuff: he’s never been a people person. If you’ve ever read one of his biographies you’ll know that Burton had enough problems just trying to understand people as a whole. With the only world outside his own messed up one was a world where diversity doesn’t matter because no one around him would have that problem or were sad-but-true backwards depictions of a minority by a white majority.

Burton sees story first and doesn’t get why things like making sure the actors are one race or another is a problem because to him, it isn’t a problem. It’s the essence of what he loves and what he wants to say that takes center frame in a Burton movie. He’ll put himself and his own struggles as well as those influences onto his characters (just was Cesar from The Cabinet of Dr. Calligari and compare it to Edward Scissorhands). Because so many of the things that inspired him as a kid starred predominantly white guys, he doesn’t think it’s failed because what he’s sees as successful is right up there on screen. Burton’s guilty of what a lot of white people do: not considering what it means to want your culture properly represented or portrayed in a film.

----

I truly don’t think Tim Burton meant to sound as backwards as he did or meant to hurt so many people. But the fact is, he did and it would be great if he realizes his mistake and says some form of apology. He should know that saying there’s a time and place for diversity is not only insensitive but very close-minded, especially when you don’t bother to explain yourself with dignity.

In every other sense, Burton seems like a mostly cool guy to talk to, a very-down-to-earth guy all considering. I hope that he somehow talks about this with people. He shouldn’t demand apologies, but if he gives people the chance to speak that’d be reason enough to at least call him responsible for his actions.

So can I(or you) still like Tim Burton’s movies, death-of-the-author not withstanding?:

Absolutely.

Burton and his work are flawed. I think there’s merit to a lot of it, but I’m not gonna act like it doesn’t have those problems nor defend them. I’ll celebrate everything else I love about Burtonfandom and advocate for more inclusion and better behavior from one of my favorite filmakers/directors.

We should be able to talk about if a filmmaker is being an ass or not like adults, not children. One ugly trend I’ve seen on tumblr is for people to skim someone’s blog, see a couple things they like, then make an assumption about that person based on what they geek about, even going so far as to denounce their opinion or say they are just as bad as the thing they like. Yeah, sometimes what people like/watch is saying about them, but that’s no reason to go into a blame game and acting so rude. I personally don’t care for Nostalgia Critic, but if I went around declaring everyone who liked it was a money-grubbing sexist jerk cause I think he is, I guess I’d have to denounce a lot of my friends who deserve to keep their opinion as I deserve to keep mine.

I want people to talk about Burton’s stupid little comment, but I don’t want a witch-hunt of fandoms to start by association. We should save rabid Burton hating and witch-hunting when it turns out the man is actually Mel Gibson living a double life.

#Tim Burton #racism #diversity #representation

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westsidevideo · 8 years ago

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One Last Look Back

It's 2017, and though we're excited to move forward, it's tough not to look back just one last time. In 2016 we lost many top notch entertainers; we rounded up some of our (maybe unconventional) favorites that go in the unforgettable section.

[Look for Ashlyn’s ratings in the brackets, as usual.]

Star Wars (1977, PG) - We hope you’ve all seen this, but just in case, go fall in love with R2-D2 and the gang. Like...now. [It’s fiiiiine.]

Postcards From The Edge (1990, R) - This one breaks the mold a bit, but two insanely good actresses playing Carrie Fisher and Debbie Reynolds, and that’s just excellent. [This is rated for language, though there is quite a bit of sex-related and drug-related talk. Probably nothings teens haven’t heard.]

Purple Rain (1984, R) - Okay, maybe this isn’t the best movie of all time, but it will always be classic, and the soundtrack is in the GOAT conversation. [Lots of upsetting themes in this one. Multiple forms of abuse, a suicide attempt, cursing, sex...so probably just older teens.]

Labyrinth (1986, PG) - The Goblin King danced through the maze and into both our dreams! [Little scary for small children.]

Galaxy Quest (1999, PG) - The cast of a very popular, discontinued science fiction television series accidentally ends up involved in a real galactic war. Will this movie make you laugh out loud? Always. [The visual gags will probably be scary for small kids, but everyone else should be good.]

To Kill A Mockingbird (1962, Unrated) - Atticus Finch dishes out lessons left and right in this classic literary tale, adapted perfectly for the screen. [The story is about a racially charged rape accusation and its echoes through a community. Probably not appropriate for small children.]

Run Ronnie Run (2002, R) - While the events of this comedy might now be a little too close to home, the endless cameos will make the trip worth it! [This has pretty much every reason for an R rating. Other parents will hate you if you show this to their kids; it’s too quotable for a clean getaway.]

When We Were Kings (1996, PG) - The Rumble In The Jungle gets the full documentary treatment here, showcasing then-underdog Muhammed Ali. [Documentaries are good for brains.]

Charlie Bartlett (2007, R) - Charlie is an eccentric teenager having trouble making friends at his new high school...until he innovates and becomes the psychiatrist to the student body, meds and all. Funny and endearing! [This would be PG-13 if they didn’t say the f-word roughly one billion times. Teens who have experienced language should be fine.]

Pretty Woman (1990, R) - The story is classic by now, and we owe it all the charms of Julia Roberts and the intuitive filmmaking of Garry Marshall. [There is obviously adult content, but it’s likely not too risque for older teens.]

Wasabi Tuna (2003, R) - This one crazy night story revolves around drag queens and gangsters in LA on Halloween Eve. Silly fun! [I’m just gonna call this one R and leave it at that.]

The Brady Bunch (1995, PG-13) - Something about taking a chance on moving our own little Pleasantville family into the 1990s made it all even more perfect. Double the nostalgia!

Firefly (2002, Television) - A little more genius from Joss Whedon in a show that was gone too soon (though the movie Serenity and the comics live on), featuring an excellent cast of misbehavin’ characters. [Fun for everyone!]

Growing Pains (1985, TV) - A family show with a home-based dad and a high-powered working mom? Sign us up! We still like the show even though one of its stars grew up to be kind of a jerk. [Family friendly.]

Extras (2005, TVMA) - An ambitious actor gets nowhere in his career, but gets us tons of excellent celebrity guest stars! [Older teens and adults.]

MASH (1972, TV) - The chuckles never stop from the folks at this Army hospital right in the middle of the Korean War, though we lost one of their finest in 2016. Salute and watch on![Kids who know what war is should be fine, although they might not get all the jokes.]

Dope (2015, R) - A blerd (Black nerd, for the new readers) trying to get into Harvard finds himself flung into a ridiculous and dangerous adventure with his friends, drug dealers, and a backpack that won’t go away. Excellent coming of age story! [Viewers will find cursing, drug references, drug use, and some sexuality. Older teens are probably good.]

The Year Without A Santa Claus (1974, Unrated) - Sick and discouraged Santa Claus decides to just skip the whole Christmas thing this year, so Mrs Claus, Vixen, and a couple of elves set out to bypass the Misers and spread some holiday joy. Classic! [All ages.]

Batman (1966, Television) - Holy cow, Batman’s early adventures are finally on DVD and you haven’t watched the whole series yet?! Get your life together and come rent this! [Not sure what a childhood would be without classic Batman, honestly.]

The Night Of The Hunter (1955, Unrated) - This is a crazy messed up noir of robberies and con artists to come out of the 1950s. You’ll be looking at dolls in other folks’ houses all sideways now. [Probably both too intense and too slowly paced for kids. Tweens and up.]

Beverly Hills, 90210 (1990, TV) - Here, America’s obsession with teen drama officially begins. Plus, get your Peach Pit tees at the shop! (Probably only teens or adults who previous

The Green Hornet (1966, TV) - Just as Batman was using bams and pows to win the hearts of Americans, Van Williams and Bruce freakin’ Lee were blasting their way through your television screens. This ain’t your grandpa’s Black Beauty! [This is a way more fun introduction to martial arts than getting knocked on the mat. Kids should be fine.]

Alfred Hitchcock Presents (1955, TV14) - An absolutely incredible amount of star power passed through the gates of this short stories format show. Every bit is worth the watch. [I’d say anybody who has already seen Psycho and The Birds and been fine with it can watch the show.]

Martin (1992, TV) - So much magic in this sitcom, and even more in the huge slate of Black-led comedy programs in the 1990s offering diverse representation to viewers. Without Martin and other shows of its time, we wouldn’t have Black-ish or Empire or How To Get Away With Murder today. We’re gonna need these laughs again soon. [Tweens and up will probably get the most out of the funnies.]

Do The Right Thing (1989, R) - This film is a masterpiece. Spike Lee brings us the hottest day of the year where the racial tensions were already turned up to eleven. [There is a lot of cursing and a big riot. Not for the wee children, but teens will need to learn eventually.]

The Sound Of Music (1965, G) - Here’s another classic that we would all be culturally poorer for not having. If you somehow have not watched this, get it together. [Family friendly, even though there are totally Nazis.]

The Big Lebowski (1998, R) - If you live in Santa Cruz, this film is required watching. No excuses! [Unless you’re a child, in which case, you’re good, don’t watch this yet, just go regular bowling. There is a lot of language and a lot of sexual references and some scenes of (mostly) comical violence. So...maybe pre-screen.]

Young Frankenstein (1974, PG) - Mel Brooks is a genius, and this is one of his standout creations. Doctor Frankensteeeen is more than worth your time! [This rides between a PG and PG-13 to me, but older kids should be okay.]

Boston Public (2000, TV) - It’s like Law & Order in a high school, as we follow faculty trying to deal with those darn kids (and also live a little). This one went four good years of full-sized seasons, so you can totally binge this over 2017’s upcoming holiday weekends. [This is in the Ally McBeal range of acceptability- little kids will have no interest, tweens and teens will be either super interested or refuse to watch with you.]

Gilmore Girls (2000, TV14) - What a gem. Seven seasons of mostly great family storytelling. Don’t miss Babette and Morey- the neighbors you always wanted!

Enter The Dragon (1973, R) - What a battle! You will want to learn kung-fu after you watch this. [There’s uh...quite a bit of fighting. ‘Cause kung-fu.]

Popular (1999, TV14) - Ryan Murphy begins! This is his pre-Glee nonmusical cheerleader-y show, and boy is it a fun watch. [Teens will love this best.]

Valley Of The Dolls (1967, PG-13) - There’s no business like show business; turns out it’ll probably seriously mess you up. [There are adult themes here, but not really actual adult material. Kids will be bored senseless, but some teens will like it.]

Grandma's Boy (2006, R) - A thirty-something video gamer ends up having to live with his grandmother and her golden girl housemates. Pretty funny stuff! [This one’s a pretty hard R.]

The Twilight Zone (1959, TV) - This is a staple, scarring kids and spooking adults for nearly 60 years. We’re privileged to have the whole series available. [There’s creepy things for everyone here, of all ages.]

Darkman (1990, R) - Sam Raimi gets weird, and we get weird with him in this fantasy actioner. [This one’s probably a PG-13 without the couple f-bombs, but it has stylized violence and a pretty twisted tone. I’d say 16+.]

Beverly Hills Cop (1984, R) - Eddie Murphy is a brilliant actor, and his comedy is on point in this culture clash story of a Detroit cop on the worst vacation ever in Beverly Hills. [There is a lot of swearing, quite a bit of violence, and a bunch of drug dealers. 16+.]

The Sopranos (1999, TVMA) - Tony Soprano is just a regular guy trying to keep his two families- home and mob- on track. This show started a lot of modern cable television trends, and will definitely survive the ages. [HBO show for grownups.]

NOW we can move on. The losses the film community sustained last year were worse than usual, in our opinion, but that just means more new folks will have to step up and become the next legends. Get to work!

#2016 happynewyear davidbowie prince carriefisher debbiereynolds genewilder sugardaddy

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