#nonnies I am sure you already forgot you asked these questions but! here you go!

[ask-ursa-tonypeter]

[DB AU] how would Pyrite!Tony react to learning exactly what happened to Peter (including that it was an alternate version of himself). Obviously this would depend on Peter making it back and maybe Tony also seeing Peter’s clear discomfort around him now.

[[this snippet also answers another question sent in: "How might Pyrite!Tony and Pyrite!Peter's react to seeing each other, after P!Peter returns home? Would P!Peter ever tell P!Tony about the details of alt-Tony? How would the kidnapping affect their relationship?"

warnings for: allusions to noncon and grooming, mentions of long-term captivity, general Sads]]

Tony thought he knew why Peter was so uncomfortable with him.

Their parents didn't seem to notice, or if they did, they were chalking it up to something else. Peter being ashamed of the big brother he idolized knowing about what had happened to him, maybe, some kind of insecurity along those lines.

If they'd really recognized it– the way Peter alternated between always watching Tony out of the corner of his eye and not being able to look at him at all, the way he went tense when Tony moved too suddenly, the way he hovered close to them but sat as far away from Tony as possible– if they'd really recognized it, they would've said something by now. They certainly wouldn't have left Peter alone with him.

It hurt, but it wasn't like Tony didn't deserve it. He had betrayed Peter's trust in a way, even if it had taken– some scumbag– taking him, keeping him, using him for Peter to realize it– so now here he was, sitting by Peter's bedside and trying to figure out how to say 'I promise I won't hurt you' to someone who had no reason to believe him.

Peter was in one of his avoidant moods. He had a mug of hot chocolate cupped between his hands and was staring down into it, quiet, the mood heavy and awkward between them while their parents dealt with phonecalls to law enforcement and publicists elsewhere in the house.

And then Peter took a breath, and he said, "Do you believe in multiverse theory?"

The non-sequitur and the fact that Peter was talking to him at all took Tony aback, but– he thought he understood.

He'd thought a lot about different versions of himself that might have made different decisions while Peter was gone, after all.

"I don't see why not," he said, slow, wanting to leave the door open for Peter to take the conversation in whatever direction he liked. "The science isn't anywhere near proving it, but the atom didn't care how long it took us to discover it, right?"

Peter nodded, almost absent-minded, his eyes still trained on his mug of cocoa. He was quiet for so long that Tony was scrambling to think of anything to say to not lose that tiny thread of connection– a joke, a string of science talk to get Peter excited, an admission of all the choices he thought the best version of himself would've made instead– but Peter still beat him to the punch.

"Mom and… our parents can't know this," he said abruptly, tipping his head slightly towards Tony even though he still didn't cut his eyes Tony's way. "They'd just think I'm crazy, probably. But it's real. The multiverse, I mean."

A chill crept into Tony's blood as he stared, Peter's words and their implications slowly sinking in.

Because there were two possibilities here, and they were both bad.

First, Peter was crazy; he'd cracked under the weight of everything he'd been through and they had an entirely different kind of recovery ahead of them than they'd thought.

Or second–

It never had made sense how Peter just disappeared out of his room.

"Yeah?" Tony prompted, and it was harder than he expected to keep the tremble out of his voice.

Peter hummed an affirmative, blinking slowly like there was something hypnotic to the warm brown of the cocoa in his mug, and he lifted his shoulder in a little shrug before he said, "It was you. Or, not you. Another version of you, I guess. He was older. And his eyes were blue?"

It didn't make sense. It didn't make sense. Cold all the way to his bones, Tony said, "Pete, what?"

Peter finally glanced at him then. Just quickly, there and gone, checking Tony's expression.

The cocoa in his mug started to ripple when he said, soft, "The man who took me."

The man who took him. The man who'd taken him away for months, for over a year until even their mother had started to give up hope, who'd left them to be tortured with questions of where and why and what, who'd put that haunted look in Peter's eyes and made it so that he couldn't stand to be touched except through layers of bundled blankets or heavy sweaters, the man who'd– who'd–

Peter's hands were still trembling around his mug, but he was the one to fill the silence again when Tony could only stare, horror-struck and unprocessing.

"He was… he was his Peter's dad. Um, the Peter in his world was his kid, I mean. They weren't brothers." Peter breathed a shaky sigh, like the words themselves were heavy. "But that Peter died, and so D– so that Tony… He wanted a replacement. So he took me."

"Pete," Tony said unsteadily, because he just– he needed a minute, he needed– he needed this to stop, he needed Peter to say he was joking, he needed things to make sense–

But Peter was suddenly in tears then, sniffling, his voice wavering wetly as the words kept coming: "He was like… a dictator, I guess? He took over the world. Or the country, I don't know, all the newspapers were about how great he was so it's not like… B-but he could do whatever he wanted. He'd just, like– execute people? You know?"

It was ridiculous. Science fiction. The type of thing someone came up with to distance themselves from the all-too-real horror of being chained to a radiator a few miles from home by an average, everyday creep.

But–

"It was really scary," Peter said, hunched over his mug to steady it in his shaking hands. "I was scared all the time. He never, he never hit me– I wasn't lying about that–"

He'd tried to lie about the rest of it, about what had been done to him, but the way he'd crumbled into tears just at their mother's horrified, faltering implication of a question had given him away.

But watching him shake, watching the words pour out of him now like poison that he needed to purge– Tony was absolutely, sickeningly certain that he wasn't lying.

"–but it was still s-so… I never knew what he was going to do? To me or someone else or…" Peter lifted one hand to wipe at his eyes, and his voice broke when he kept going. "He made me call him 'Dad.'"

That was the thing that made his steady trickle of tears tip over into a hitching sob, and Tony didn't want to think about why. He didn't want to think about any of this– he didn't want to know about any of this; he didn't know what he was going to do with the rising tides of guilt and horror and regret flooding his heart and lungs and throat, and he wasn't even the one who had a right to be upset here, he wasn't the one who'd had to live it–

Peter had one hand pressed to his mouth, covering the grimace of his quiet sobs while his mug tipped dangerously close to spilling.

"Your drink–" Tony said, helpless, useless, so fucking useless, hearing all of that and worrying about fucking chocolate stains on Peter's covers like that mattered, but what else could he say? What else could he possibly do or fix when it was his face that was making Peter break down and sob like this, when every second just had to be a reminder of–

Peter heard him, though, and he adjusted his grip, because even in the middle of crying his mangled little heart out he was still perfect and good and someone Tony shouldn't even be allowed near.

But maybe that was the thing he could fix.

"Kid–"

Tony's voice cracked, and he cleared his throat hard, pulling himself together. He wasn't going to let Peter feel– fucking guilty about this, and he wouldn't put that past him, even now.

He tried again:

"...Do you want me to leave?"

It was almost a relief to think about. Accepting that he didn't have a place in Peter's life and slinking away to where he couldn't hurt him; putting that corner of his heart to bed for good. He'd thought so much while Peter was gone about whether Peter would've been better off never getting involved with him, and there would be some closure in knowing it for sure.

But instead of sending him away, Peter groaned, "I don't know," wrung out and scrubbing one sleeve across his damp eyes. "No. I don't know. I'm just… I know you didn't… b-but I… do you believe me?"

It felt like confessing to a crime somehow, accepting that he believed some other version of himself out there could be that kind of monster.

But Tony wasn't going to lie.

"Yeah, kid. I… fuck."

He cleared his throat again, chasing away the tightness that wanted to gather there, and if he couldn't help the prickling in his eyes– well, Peter wasn't looking at him anyway.

"M'sorry. For everything. I'm– yeah." He shook his head, and Peter deserved more from him– so, so much more from him– but he had to move on then, because if he gave Peter the apology he deserved and let all of it spill out he really would just break down right there and fuck up everything worse than it already was. "This– this– fucker– how did you– can he follow you? I've gotta– I won't let it happen again. Pete, I won't let it happen again."

It was a stupid thing to promise, probably. The whole idea still sounded like fiction, and Tony didn't even know where to start with– finding some way to anchor Peter to home, making some kind of multiversal warning system, cutting their whole fucking universe off from whatever else was out there if that's what it took, but–

If another version of himself had figured out how to tamper with the multiverse, then so could he. And this was something he could fix.

Peter stared at him, then. Not a sideways glance, but an outright, unprocessing stare like it was beyond belief that– what, that Tony would believe him? Want to help him? Care about keeping him safe?

Care about him at all?

Tony clenched his jaw, fingernails biting into the meat of his palms with the effort of pushing down every other thought and feeling and impulse, and he said, "I won't let anyone hurt you."

Peter's gaze went distant, almost like he hadn't heard Tony at all. He blinked slowly, and then his eyes meandered away from Tony and back down to his lap. He finally took a long sip of his cocoa, and then shrugged.

"He can't follow me," Peter said finally, slowly. Dreamlike, almost, like he had to hunt around for the words and was surprised to find them. "He's… gone. So it's okay."

It was a relief to hear that the guy was "gone." It was another moment of horror to imagine what that meant for Peter; what he'd had to see and go through and what else was lurking in his memories for him to dole out in soft, uncertain, devastating words.

And it hurt to have him brush away Tony's promises. Without even an instant of taking comfort in them, without even a second of his old starry-eyed gratitude, and Tony didn't need that from him but– to see it so clearly, how his words didn't hold any weight at all anymore after what Peter had been through– and why would they, why would they when it was Tony who was saying them–

Tony didn't know if he was trying to reassure Peter or punish himself, if he was fishing for forgiveness or reprobation, but the words finally clawed their way out of his chest in a wave of sincerity and self-hatred that he couldn't stop:

"I won't hurt you," he said, desperate, and it was what he'd wanted to say all along. "We're– all of that is done, okay? I would never hurt you. Never."

And Peter–

Smiled.

Not a sweet smile. Not a shy smile or a relieved smile or anything at all like an expression Tony would ever expect to see on Peter's face. It was a tiny, bitter twist of his lips as he stared down into his mug, his gaze so faraway that he may as well have still been in another universe, and Tony's heart dropped before he even spoke.

"I know," Peter said, simple.

And with the same terrible certainty that Tony had known that Peter's story was true– this time, he knew that Peter was lying.

[obeymeluv]

Isnt devildom liquor weaker than human world liquor? Mc had beat Asmo in a drinking contest. How do you think it they'd act, completely hammered in the human world. I think harder liquor means stupider drunks.

Spoiler alert to the in-game MC’s “heritage” reveal. You know, the descendent/reincarnation thing. If you know, you know.

Below: Thoughts on Devildom liquor + the specific incident Nonnie is talking about with Asmo in game + THE ACTUAL ANSWER TO THE ASK. My bad, haha.

My thoughts on Devildom liquor at that point in the game:

The MC is not as affected because they are human/angel. Maybe the angel part fortifies MC and makes it harder for them to get drunk?

Maybe the HUMAN side of MC is what makes it harder for them to get drunk on Devildom liquor? Like...everything in the Devildom is made primarily for demons so maybe there are ingredients in there that specifically affect those with demon blood. Maybe humans don’t have the biology to be inebriated by those ingredients?

I am a little fuzzy on that point in the game but did Asmo pre-game? Like, a lot? Did we ever find out? I could see him being so emotionally distraught that his lovely MC is leaving that he just wants to be sloshed. Maybe he assumed MC beat him in a drinking contest because he forgot how much he already drank?

Maybe Solomon gave MC a heads up that Asmo was down for drinking and gave them a pre-game potion of their own to ward off the affects.

End hypothesis: Maybe Devildom liquor IS strong (for demons) but that potency just can’t translate in human bodies so the bros (Lucifer especially) don’t want MC drinking it because they’re not sure what it will do. They just ASSUME it will do to MC what it does to them.

Other thoughts: Because demons sprinkled little secrets to the humans over the course of history, gave them trinkets and magic and things, I’d like to think they gave humans the idea or process of alcohol-making but are TOTALLY not prepared for the end result. All the flavors, types, etc. 

As far as I understand it (at the point I’m at in the game), travel between the Devildom and human world was widely discouraged until Diavolo could make a program that united the three realms and improved the overall image. So basically everyone has been separated for thousands of years.

What if demons are equally bad at holding human world liquor? I could just see a drunk Asmo being like, “What is this? Sangria? This isn’t what I told them to call it.” as he’s trying to drink and (speed) walk away from Beel, who wants the fruit out of the pitcher.

I could just see them all getting TOTALLY wasted on human world stuff just because they thought “Ahh, we taught them this 5,000 years ago! Of COURSE we can handle it! We invented it!” (spoiler alert: they cannot). Like, I’d like to think their biology works against them here. They heal quicker and probably get over stomach aches and things quicker, so they probably metabolize alcohol quicker to restore bodily equilibrium so they probably get flash-drunk off of just about anything with a decent alcohol content. 

HOW THEY WOULD ACT (AKA: the real question)

The facts: 

They’re all going to be like drunk kittens, big bassy purrs and wanting to cuddle you or scent you. 

They’ll basically curl up in a pile together; you occasionally have to move body parts (so no one suffocates). 

Do a head count every now and then, give them some crackers/carbs when needed, and put water all around them like a summoning circle because when one of them wakes up, all of them will and they’ll act like big babies

Put a bucket near Lucifer and Asmo, they’re sympathy pukers.

Levi and Belphie need total sensory deprivation when they wake up. You may only breach the darkness to bring them things to settle their stomach and anything to kill the headache

Just give Beel bread and anything like Gatorade/Pedialite. He’ll help you with the others after three loaves or so.

Asmo will be especially pitiful and demand you take care of the others first. Once they’re decently able to take care of themselves he’s near teary-eyed, demanding tummy rubs and tell him he’s still pretty even though he feels awful. Please get him a sheet mask.

Mammon’s not functional enough to help with anything major but he’s standing the next day so he rubs that in everyone’s face. He’s the one shuffling around with a half-eaten sandwich, looking for any comfort item (heating pack, cold wrap for his head). He will demon screech at you if you touch any of the lights in the house.

As Mammon comes to, he demands dim lights and acts like a grumpy mom. He’s making porridge and they better shut up and eat it. Says it’s for him but there’s a suspicious amount of bowls nearby.

Satan just swears he’ll never drink again (like always). Dutifully waits for porridge. Spends most of his time letting cold water run over his head. Can’t spend too much time hunched over because he gets nauseous. Baby him a little. Find a way to let his head float in a bit of water where he can lay down and he’s as quiet as a mouse. 

Who can drink the most? (Best to worst - my opinions only)

1) Beel (body mass helps), 2) Mammon (party king), 3) Asmodeus (huuuge history with mixed drinks. Boy is READY), 4) Lucifer, 5) Satan (neck and neck with Lucifer - casual drinker only. Even wine is rare for him), 6) Leviathan, 7) Belphie (usually sleeping instead of drinking). 

Lucifer:

We’ve seen little gags about how ‘Lucifer got drunk and unplugged the router’ so this guy’s either going to be super cuddly, a hot mess, or both

You know the people who fluff their hair, comb it back, undo a tie or some buttons and just get comfy as they drink? That’s Lucifer.

He’ll smile a bit more, laugh a bit more, and there will be some color to his cheeks

He’s not sloppy, just cozy. 

Drunk Lucifer is not overly loud but he is honest. He won’t throw himself into groups or pester all the brothers, but he’s up for some accidentally-heartwarming one-on-one

When he’s drunk he’ll lay his head on your shoulder and let you play with his hair

Will not win any drinking games. Is actually a lightweight compared to his brothers (see best > worst drinker, above).

Mammon:

GO BIG OR GO HOME! MAMMON’S HERE TO PLAY FOR BIG MONEY! (AKA: bragging rights that he can handle more than his brothers)

He and Asmo are quick to get the drinks flowing because they want to try shots of everything. 

He and Asmo are pretty good at matching brothers to drinks and tasting subtle notes, things like that

Show Mammon beer pong once and it’s done. He’s betting the brothers he can whoop them and is somehow able to pull off ping pong ball math to get Lucifer shit-faced real quick (might do it even faster if Belphie or Satan slip him some money)

The type to be like “Bet you I can hit that cup right there--third row, second from the left.” and can do it flawlessly. You have to give him head pats or $5, that’s the rules.

He’ll be one of the bros you have to chase around and make put his clothes back on. Boy will try to strip and strut

Will definitely hoard his favorite bottle (picked it on smell) and spend a majority of the time trying to drink it and avoid the bros. (”YOU CAN’T MAKE ME SHARE IF YOU CAN’T CATCH ME!”)

Leviathan

Not the best drinker. Not a frequent drinker at all.

His envy makes him drink because as he starts to go on a tangent about how ‘it’s not fair! Everyone’s having a good time!’ when he realizes it’s as easy as picking up a drink. Like...he can join in too.

Levi won’t grab himself an alcoholic drink because he’s a nervous over-thinker. Asmo or Mammon will just hand him a cup like the resident Liquor Fairy and he trusts their judgement

The first one to let his demon form out just because the liquor is a little warm in his belly and he feels like he’s flying? Also comfortable?

The excited drunk who goes on animated, slurred rants

The loud laugher

He’s honestly so adorably animated that anyone who knew him would be surprised? He seems far from a shut in

Trade off: he can’t hold his liquor well

Boy probably trips on his own tail or thinks something snagged his ankle to bring him down when, in fact, he just fell down

Sways when he sits

When he’s done, he just wants a nice comfy lap to lay in and maybe play with his hair. 

Like Lucifer, liquor will make him confess all his feelings. 

Watch out for the tail. It will be all over you when he starts to lose the ability to wrap it around himself.

Satan:

It’s a toss-up as to whether he gets drunk before Lucifer or vice versa. I’d like to think his tolerance is slightly higher since he might run in the same circles as Asmo, but he is a part of Lucifer so I’m sure it balances out

He’s a drink snob and this is what hurts him the most. He goes to fancy tastings and random things he’s invited to, but this is a drop in the bucket

He’s never gone hardcore before because he’s afraid he’ll be prone to anger

He’s not. He’s actually a lot like Levi. He just wants to smile and laugh and have fun.

The one who knows a lot of random/interesting stuff and has unexpectedly awesome party tricks

He and Asmo act as instigators and somehow con everyone else into getting drunk. It’s mostly because he wants blackmail material, but he enjoys the mind games

He’s the one you’re going to have to carry BUT he’s super chill when he’s having a good time. You want him to wear a lampshade? Okay, but only if you call him Enlightened One (get it?)

Makes bad jokes. Lucifer definitely laughs

The one that randomly dances with someone at the party. But it’s a fancy dance or slow dance, not something crazy

Will try to prove he’s not as drunk as he is by reading or reciting something and just breaks down into snorts and giggles

Cat Mode: Activated. He wants to be all over you. Hug him and play with his hair, please.

Asmo:

Asmo isn’t really different from his usual self.

He’s a little social butterfly, making his rounds and checking on people

He’s the silent, sneaky drunk. No one notices he’s drunk until his face starts getting red and his eyes get glassy

The quiet cuddler. Just progressively gets closer to you until he’s resting his head on your shoulder, hugging you from the side and asking you to give him his drink.

Would be the happiest person on the planet if you literally just held his drink up to his lips and let him drink it when he wanted to. You just love him so much?! You’re so thoughtful?! He wants to cry

Guilty party #2 for ‘chase him around and make him put his clothes back on’

Next in line for ‘Liquor makes me tell the truth and my darkest secrets’.

Will try any activity at the party and will dance at least once with everybody

If he gets in a fight, that’s because someone doesn’t respect what he put on the party playlist. He knows good music, okay?!

Has a personal goal to steal one drink from everyone, drink it before they realize, and hand them back the empty cup as he slips away. Something about it just amuses him.

Wants to leave lipstick/lip gloss kisses on people. Thinks they’re the cutest accessory!

The one who loses something at the party and makes everyone look for it the next day

The one who’s passed out in a random spot and no one has the heart to move them but everyone checks on them to make sure they’re safe. When everyone’s turned in for the night, he is safely moved like the precious baby he is.

Beel:

The one who takes the longest to get drunk. You don’t know if it’s because of his build or how much he ate to offset the alcohol

Unofficial baby sitter of the group. Pays special attention to everyone but Belphie, Asmo, and Levi in particular.

Not super loud. Just vibes and enjoys time with his family.

He’ll participate in the party activities because he does have that competitive streak but he’s not as invested in it as Mammon. If he wins at least once he’s proved his point and is on to something else

Surprsingly, #3 to ‘you might have to chase him and make him put his clothes on’. Drunk Beel is convinced he’ll get over the alcohol faster with less clothes because of temperature regulation and something that doesn’t really make sense because he’s slurring

Will drink more if Belphie is nearby or if he can hold onto Belphie. Taking care of Belphie and knowing he’s okay (in a tactile way) makes him a little more carefree. 

Doesn’t really confess like the other bros but he’s the one no one can really hear talking because his purr takes over everything. His purrs are so loud and deep! Big boy is truly happy

Drunk Beel is affectionate as ever and this is where you learn that demons can express affection by licking people. Most of the bros end up with a Simba-style mohawk. It’s just one lick but Beel’s got a long tongue and it fucks with hair real good.

Will jump in for a song or two if karaoke is a thing at the party. A really good singer but wouldn’t do it unless he had a decent amount of alcohol in him.

He’s the type to trip over stuff trying to help clean up. If he falls down he says he’s just ‘taking a break’ and will ‘help in a minute’. Might not get up again.

Once Beel lays down, Belphie, Satan, and Levi drunk crawl/stumble/slither over to him for warmth. This is how the cuddle pile starts.

When he lays down, if you get anywhere near him, he’s begging you to lay down with him. Wants to whisper little compliments and lovely things. A big sap. Handsy but will definitely know when to lay off and will listen if you get uncomfortable. 

Belphie:

Honestly, doesn’t really drink. He’s more interested in the nap.

His biggest motivation is to get the others drunk so everyone’s quiet and he can sleep. Definitely wants Lucifer blackmail.

He’ll have a few things but he prefers a lot of something mild versus a mix or a few shots of something super potent

Will try the funnel drink challenge.

The third enticer. He wants to work everyone up (Lucifer especially) and get the booze going.

Borrows off of Beel’s body mass and ability to handle alcohol here and there, but it all catches up with him eventually

The type to have really diluted drinks because he’s already sleepy by nature and doesn’t want to faceplant with a shot glass.

Will slow dance with Asmo. When Asmo starts to struggle with his weight as Belphie gets cozy and sleepy, Beel steps in and you just see the twins purring and warbling to each other as Beel just scoops him up and lets him sit on his hip like a toddler.

Another one who wants to slither into your lap and take all your attention.

The type to do random shit like boop your nose and giggle about it.

The one who doesn’t want anyone else to touch you. If he’s laying on you then the others need to leave you alone. It’s not hard to understand!

[brendaonao3]

For the Top Gun Ask Meme, please - 5, 16, 24

Hihi!!!! Sure thing, Nonnie!!

For the Top Gun Ask Meme

5. What’s an underrated ship?

i just talked about this in my last answer, but I am THE biggest sucker for Hangman/Maverick. They've both had to go on these similar journeys as far as learning how to be team players, and learning that being the best means bringing everyone home, and that cockiness is no substitute for having people around you who will have your back & go to the mat for you when it counts, and I just think they'd have a lot to teach each other.

(Ngl, the visuals don't hurt either :D - shallow as a kiddie pool and proud of it. And Glen Powell's very obvious crush on Tom is adorable, which certainly helps.)

16. Do you have any headcanons you want to share?

Sure, here's a fun one I'm exploring in one of the (many) fics I'm toying with - I don't think Bradley found out about Mav pulling his papers until much later on. I don't think he even questioned it until he was already IN the Navy, in OCS or even flight school, and maybe a friend of Goose's asked why he didn't follow in his old man's footsteps and graduate from the Naval Academy and maybe then he does some digging and finds out and that's all she wrote.

Also, I'm sure I'm not the first person to headcanon this, but I totally think that Goose & Ice were in the Naval Academy at the same time, and that's how they met & became friends.

24. Tell me your thoughts about [character of asker’s choice].

You forgot to mention a character, so I'm going with Penny Benjamin, because I love her and she should be talked about more. She's an Admiral's daughter with a rebellious streak and a daredevil streak and she's not afraid to break a few rules or strike out on her own or learn from her mistakes or admit that she's winging it as she goes. She's a beloved small business owner, a great mom, she knows her own mind and what she wants, and she gives as good as she gets, and gives ZERO fucks, and I just think she's great. And that there were more fics/headcanons about her.

[flowerpowelltales]

Until You Hate Me (Liam x MC)

PART THREE - THE BEGINNING

A/N: Yes, I do feel ashamed I forgot about this series for TWO years. I also am aware most of you, who have been tagged, dont even remember ever reading this series. If you’d like to be taken off the taglist just let me know because I don’t want to bother anyone. If you want a refresher - it’s the series where Regina pays Riley to be the worst suitor ever so that in two weeks, Liam would have to marry someone Regina picked for him. Previous parts are on my masterlist. Shoutout to the Nonny who motivated me to write this part. Hope y’all enjoy! Characters belong to PB. 

Rating: G

Word count: 1692

Tagging: @gardeningourmet @delightfullypinkglitter @blackcatkita @badchoicesposts @jared2612 @princess-geek @desiree-pow-35-1986​ @emichelle​ @ao719​ @cordoniantrash @kinggliam @needalittlerain @flyawayboo @nazariortega @jlpplays1 @kimmiedoo5 @annekebbphotography​ @ladyangel70​ @eadanga​ @kingliam2019​ @nz1091​ @emceesynonymroll @texaskitten30 @mskaneko​ @custaroonie @drakesensworld​ @janezillow @ritachacha​ @lodberg​ @msjr0119​ @gkittylove99​ @sweatyrysconnoisseur​ @dcbbw​ @potter1-7harry​

“Welcome to Cordonia,” Liam said when the Royal Jet finally landed. He looked at Riley warily as she took in the sights. The flight was a total disaster and made him rethink his whole life. If he hadn’t known better he’d think she wanted to sabotage his mission.

“Looks sick,” she said and Liam sighed.

“Liam, Riley, the car is here. Come before anyone spots us.” Regina nodded towards their driver.

“Whoa, we have our own driver? That’s mad!”

Regina raised an eyebrow in a ‘do-not-overdo-it’ manner but Riley ignored it. For her it was either go hard or go home. Literally, because if she failed she’d go home with no money.

The ride from the private airport to the palace was silent; Riley was admiring the views, Liam was thinking if he made the right choice and Regina was already planning Liam’s wedding to Madeleine.

When they arrived, Regina excused herself and went straight into her office.

“What do you think?” Liam asked politely when they were the only two left.

“It looks so… majestic. Like something I’d expect a palace look like but at the same time like something I wouldn’t expect. It’s gorgeous.”

Liam turned to her stunned by her words. What happened to “sick” and “mad”? Maybe it wouldn’t be that bad, after all.

“Come inside,” he said and extended his hands towards her. She took it and then gasped at the interior.

“It’s so regal and so big and oof—” Riley was almost knocked out by a small, fluffy ball that jumped at her.

“Ah, this is Chance, Maxwell’s dog. He must feel you’re a good person because he is never that happy about strangers.” Liam smiled as he leaned to take her coat. She handed it to him and when Liam walked away to hang it, she bent over to Chance. 

“Hey, buddy! I’m super flattered you like me but can you please bite me or start barking at me so Liam doesn’t think I’m good?” She asked and Chance titled his head in confusion. “You see,” she lowered her voice, “I have a mission to complete.”

When Chace still couldn’t understand, Riley tried to speak his language.

“Woof woof woof woof,” she barked at Chance in low voice.

“Um… is everything okay, lady Riley?” Liam asked, suddenly appearing behind her. Shoot.

“Mhm. Just talking to that cute little muffin. And please, call me Riley. I’m no lady.”

“If you insist. Would you like to see your room?”

“Sure! Does it have a mini fridge? I bet it’s totally dope!”

Liam shook his head in disbelief. Riley changed her mood every few minutes. He couldn’t figure her out. Sometimes she was serious and really fun to talk to but then she changed again and acted like a spoiled teenager.

“Here we are.” Liam motioned the room when they finally reached the guest chamber. “It doesn’t have a mini fridge but you can call any of the staff members to ask for whatever you’d like, anytime.”

“Cool.”

“Ah, Liam! Riley! I am so glad to see you both here!” Regina exclaimed with a smiled on her face. “We have a dinner today with a few of our friends. Liam, please help lady Riley to prepare for it.”

“Of course, Regina. Who are we expecting?” Liam asked.

“Duchess Olivia Nevrakis, Lord Neville, Duchess Adelaide, her daughter and Duke Godfrey, lady Hana Lee and her parents, and a few of the court members.”

Liam nodded politely but started to panic internally. Lord Neville, Godfrey and Adelaide weren’t exactly the first people he wanted Riley to be introduced to. He knew too well how they treated commoners and how awful they could be. He had only about two hours before the dinner to go through the royal protocol, table manners, dress code and how to address who. When he looked up at Riley he noticed she was already studying him.

“Everything’s alright?”

“Yes, it is. I just thought we would have more time before your debut.”

“Oh, don’t worry about that! I was born ready!” she said reassuringly, which, ironically, made Liam even less reassured.

~~~~

“So when I see Hana Lee’s dad I should say ‘ni hao’, right?”

“Correct! And can you please repeat how you would address Duchess Olivia?”

“Your Grace,” Riley replied.

“Exactly. And Lord Neville?”

“…Also your Grace?”

“Yes. How would you address me, then?”

“Your Majesty?”

“No, Majesty is used for Kings and Queens. I’m not a King yet so I ought to be addressed ‘your Highness’.”

“So Regina is her Majesty?” Riley asked.

“Precisely. Now, what is my title?”

“Prince?”

“Full title.”

“Prince Louis of Cordonia.”

“Ye—What? What Louis?”

“Your name isn’t Louis?”

“No,” he shook his head. “It’s Liam.”

“Oh, right! Sorry, I’ve always had a problem with remembering names.”

Liam smiled but wanted to scream. Remembering names was probably one of the most important things Riley had to learn. And she forgot even his.

“Let me get this straight, when I talk to you I always have to use ‘your highness’?”

“When we’re with nobility, yes. It shows respect. When there’s only me and you, or friends and family, you can call me by my name,” he explained.

“Which is Louis!”

“Liam,” he corrected. Again.

“Sorry! Sorry!” Riley apologized. “I’ll just need something to associate you with… Oh! I know! I used to listen to One Direction a lot and Liam was the name of one of the singers! I liked him a lot!”

“Whatever works for you.” Liam smiled, feeling less and less enthusiastic about his mission.

~~~~

Two hours and three braincell losses later, Riley was walking arm in arm with Liam, into the ballroom. She was wearing a very expensive dress, more expensive than everything she owned altogether. She was very stressed and started to regret coming here. Pretending to be the worst suitor in front of Liam was one thing, but pretending to be the worst suitor in front of all Cordonian nobility was a completely different thing.

“Look, there’s Xinghai, he’s coming here,” Liam whispered and Riley nodded as the man approached them. Liam nudged Riley.

Okay. Show time.

“Hey hoe!” She yelled, making everyone freeze.

I hate myself.

“Riley!” Liam hissed, pinching her arm.

“Excuse me?” Xinghai asked as if not believing his ears.

“I think Riley tried to say ‘ni hao’, is that right?” Liam raised his eyebrows and Riley felt sick.

“Yes! Ni hao! I’m so sorry, I’m very bad at languages!”

Xinghai shook his head. “If you say so.”

“Hi, I’m Hana! And this is my mother, Lorelai.” A girl with a very friendly face extended her hand as if she hadn’t noticed that huge faux-pas. Her mom barely smiled at her.

“Nice to meet you.”

“Your Highness.” A man approached them and raised a glass. “I feel deeply honored to be invited here today. Her Majesty mentioned you would bring an American suitor, is this that lovely lady?”

Riley didn’t know who it was but she sure hated him already. She looked at Liam and realized she wasn’t the only one thinking so.

“Lord Neville. I am very happy you could join us. Yes, this is lady Riley, my suitor. Lady Riley, this is Lord Neville.”

“Lord? Like Lord of the Rings? Is that even a real title?” she asked.

“Excuse me?” Neville was confused and Liam embarrassed. From the corner of her eye, Riley could see Regina smiling at the sight.

At least someone is happy with what I’m doing.

“I believe we haven’t met.” A blond woman interrupted them, holding a glass of champagne in one hand and a very unhappy man in the other.

“This is Duchess Adelaide, Duke Godfrey and their daughter, Countess Madeleine. And this lovely woman by my side is lady Riley.”

“Hi y’all! Louis told me so much about you!” She heard Liam sighing.

“Hmph” was all Godfrey said. The rest of the family looked confused.

“Who’s Louis?” Adelaide asked.

“What happened to One Direction association?” Liam whispered to her when the family wasn’t looking.

“I forgot Louis was in the band, too,” she replied.

“If you excuse us,” Liam turned to Adelaide, “but we need to say hello to Duchess Olivia. Thank you for coming.”

He quickly led Riley far from Adelaide and Godfrey, avoiding other court members on the way. He couldn’t do this. At least not today. Riley clearly wasn’t ready.

“Why hello there,” a lady with red hair and a matching dress greeted them.

“Olivia. Hello. How are you?” Liam started a small talk and Riley noticed he was more relaxed talking to her than he was talking to other people. She must be a friend, she thought.

“I’m great. Haven’t been to a party that is as much fun as this one. And it’s all thanks to you. I’m Olivia.”

“Riley. You’re the Ice Queen?” Riley asked remembering Lythikos was a winter wonderland. She hoped Olivia would be offended just like the others but to her surprise the Duchess burst out laughing.

“Ice Queen! I like her already,” she said as she wiped a tear from her eye. “Absolutely loved when she questioned Neville’s title. The man’s pain in the ass.”

“I’m glad you find it funny,” Liam said firmly. Olivia shrugged and turned to take another glass of wine.

“I’m really sorry I embarrassed you, Louis.”

“Liam,” he corrected.

“Liam,” Riley repeated. “I’ve just came to Cordonia and had only two hours to take it all in. I’ll be better in time.” Not sure how better at making you hate me I can get though.

“It’s fine. Listen, it’s me who should be apologizing. As you said, you just came here and within a few hours you had to learn things I learned throughout the years.”

Riley’s eyes widened. She embarrassed him, she humiliated him and he still apologized? She felt awful.

“I still feel bad. I promise I won’t let you down,” she lied and Liam smiled.

“I’m happy to hear that because we’re visiting our apple orchard tomorrow and the press will be there to meet you, too.”

Riley gulped as she smiled at Liam.

That only meant she had to try even harder.

[thewayshedreamed]

Open Secrets— Nessian AU

Prompt submission by Nonnie— Reverse fake dating au where everyone thinks you’re dating and you’re keeping it a secret, but you’re not.

Thanks to whoever submitted this prompt! I’d originally completed this prompt for Feysand, but I struggled between that one and this one! Thanks to @awesomelena555 and @bookstantrash for encouraging me to post the Nessian version too!

——————————————————————————

Nesta pulled up to Rhysand and Feyre’s new home about 30 minutes after their house-warming party had begun. It was certainly a little out of character of her, being that she was someone who considered five minutes early as “on time”. It wasn’t really her fault. Elain had called her right before she pulled into their neighborhood to let her know they had drastically underestimated the amount of alcohol they would need for all the guests. Nesta had driven a little past the neighborhood to make the supplemental booze run, and she was about to walk into this party a hero.

She slipped into the party, aiming to keep a low profile. She absolutely hated arriving somewhere and being the sudden center of attention, so she was hoping to avoid that. The party was split; half indoors and half outdoors, making it all the easier for her.

She took inventory of her surroundings as she made her way toward the kitchen. There were several small groups sprinkled around in conversation, and some were outside playing yard games or drinking games. She already felt hungover just watching them.

Her eyes landed on Rhys, Azriel, and Cassian. They were off to the side, all sipping on drinks, and talking enthusiastically with each other. She noticed Cassian seemed to be on the receiving end of whatever hell they were giving, if his rigid posture and frequent eye rolling was any indication. She chuckled a little at that; he probably had that coming.

He excused himself abruptly from the conversation, tossing his beer bottle into a trash can a few feet away. He walked toward the house, and Nesta quickly directed her attention back to unloading the beer and liquor to wherever it needed to be stored in the kitchen. She heard the sliding glass door open, then close, followed by heavy footsteps walking through the kitchen.

“Hey, Nes! When did you get here?” He threw an arm around her shoulders, giving her a side-hug while she worked.

It seemed like such a small thing to most, but the fact that she and Cassian had made it to this point impressed her. With the way things had started when they’d originally met, things looked bleak for them on the friendship front. She wasn’t sure when his snark and cocky demeanor shifted from infuriating to endearing, but she had come to learn that those traits were such a tiny part of who he was. All of that considered, she leaned in to the casual side-hug, not wanting to take their progress for granted.

“Just now, actually. I haven’t even finished unloading the car.”

”Damn, sweetheart. How much booze did you bring?!” He grabbed a beer from the fridge and opened it as he leaned back on the counter.

”Probably not enough if we’re sharing with the likes of you,” she teased. She felt a small tap between her shoulder blades, followed by a ping sound. She turned around to see Cassian’s beer cap sliding across the floor. That little shit actually threw his beer cap at her.

She glared at him and was met with a sideways smirk on his face. He broke into a laugh when she didn’t back down and rocked forward to push himself off the counter.

“Sorry, sweetheart. I’ll make it up to you by helping you unload the car. Keep me company?” he requested.

”Fine. On the way you can tell me what your friends were giving you shit about outside. I’m starting to think maybe you earned it,” she taunted.

The cadence of his steps was interrupted just a fraction by her question, but he recovered quickly enough.

”Actually, I don’t know that I did this time.”

”Well now I’m definitely intrigued.”

He hesitated for several seconds, his jaw working as he thought through what to say next.

“I’m not sure I should tell you,” he stated, as he opened the backseat of her car. He grabbed the rest of the drinks before shutting her car door firmly.

“That makes me want to know even more, Cassian.”

”Okay, fine. But just remember that you wanted this. And you can’t be mad or get weird about it.”

His disclaimer gave her pause, but she nodded her head anyway. Curiosity won this round.

“For whatever reason, they have their minds made up that you and I are seeing each other and are trying to keep it on the down low. I’m still not entirely sure why they think we would keep it under wraps if we were involved, but that’s their theory right now.” His words came out in a rush as if he was trying to get it over with and pretend they never had the conversation.

Nesta merely blinked several times before replying, “Hm. Okay. So I get that they didn’t tell you why they think we’d hide it, but did they at least say why they think we’re a thing in the first place?”

Cassian rolled his eyes as he unloaded the remaining drinks into the refrigerator.

“Who the fuck knows with those two? All I remember them saying was something about how we have way too much tension between us and how we went from hating each other to being friendly overnight.” He took a swig of his beer.

”So, since we’re nice to each other now, we’re fucking?” There was no frustration in her tone. She was actually a little amused at how faulty the logic was.

Cassian choked on his beer; the result of not being prepared for that question coming from Nesta, of all people. He coughed into his elbow several times before he recovered.

“Caught me off guard, sorry. Yes, apparently, but I told them to knock it off.”

She was lost in thought for several seconds. “This could be fun,” she mused.

”What could be fun?” His confusion was obvious all over his face.

“The more we try to prove them wrong, the more they’re going to think they’re right. So why not just lean into it and have a little fun messing with them.”

”Oo. I like this. Get them all riled up about it and let them down later. I can’t say I’d hate to watch them squirm a little,” he replied.

”Exactly. But if we do this, we have to commit. We can’t question each other in front of anyone else, or the whole thing is shot,” she warned. “If we feel like we’re not on the same page, we reconvene here and make our way back out there once we figure it out.”

He smiled at her, a true broad smile, with the gleam of mischief in his hazel eyes. “You’re a wicked little woman, Archeron. I love it.”

——————————————————————————

They walked from the kitchen together, breaking apart once Nesta started making her rounds to greet everyone. Cassian walked back over to his friends, who were both clearly amused with themselves even still. He wanted to throttle both of them.

“What took you so long, Cass?” Rhys asked, a cocky little half smile on his face.

”Helped Nesta unload all the booze out of her car.” He took a long swig of his beer. “Don’t you say a fucking word, you prick.”

”Wouldn’t dream of it,” Rhys replied, earning a laugh from Azriel.

Both of them looked over his shoulder just as he felt someone approach him from behind. He felt a small hand rest on his bicep, turning him slightly toward them.

“Hey, Cass,” Nesta beamed up at him, and he swore his heart stopped. “I never said thank you for helping me.” She glanced down at her hand, and quickly drew it away to put it in her back pocket. She looked down at the ground and cleared her throat before looking at him again. “So, thank you. I owe you one.”

Wow, she was good. She looked every bit the part of someone who lost her bearings and was caught being affectionate. His returning smile was genuine.

“Of course. Happy to do it,” he replied, as she turned her attention to greet Rhysand and Azriel.

She walked away to make her next stop in greetings, and he made sure to watch her go for just a second longer than necessary. When he turned his attention back to the guys, they were smirking at each other like the smug bastards they were. This was going to be too easy.

——————————————————————————

The next couple of hours progressed in a similar fashion. Surprisingly, they stayed on the same page without much effort, playing off of each other from one scenario to the next. They gravitated to each other when their paths happened to cross, but they kept their interactions short. If someone walked up on them, they slipped away somewhat awkwardly as if they were guilty of something they shouldn’t be doing. They easily slipped small, seemingly intimate actions into each interaction whenever they knew Rhys or Azriel was nearby. Nesta would rest her hand on Cassian’s forearm briefly as they laughed. Cassian would shove her with his shoulder in passing, earning a playful scolding from Nesta. A couple of times when they were standing in a small group, Nesta would subtly grab Cassian’s drink to take a sip and hand it back as if it were second nature. In response, Cassian would rub his thumb absent-mindedly over where her lips had touched the rim. By this point, Rhys and Azriel were nearly bursting with their desire to call them out on their behavior.

They partnered up for a couple of games, making it a point to stand an arm’s length apart. However, occasionally when things would go their way, they would engage in a celebratory hug and simultaneously spring apart to their original places like they forgot themselves. Nesta decided they worked incredibly well together despite being such an unlikely alliance. They won the second game and celebrated with loud cheers and a high five. Nesta caught Cassian’s eye briefly, muttering “Kitchen, in 5” through her smile.

She made her way there and busied herself with refilling her drink. Right on time, she heard Cassian’s heavy footfall entering the kitchen. She turned around, meeting his amused expression with one of her own.

”Hey! Everything okay? Am I not reading this right?” he asked.

“No, no, no. You’re great. I just wanted to talk without eyes on us for a second to see how you think things are going. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve caught Rhys and Azriel glancing over at us,” she said through a chuckle. His shoulders seemed to relax at her reassurance.

He responded with a laugh of his own. “Oh, they’re crawling out of their skin. Especially Rhys. It kills him when he thinks he’s right but can’t say anything.”

”That’s definitely like him,” Nesta joked.

Around Cassian’s shoulder, she saw Azriel through the glass door approaching the house. She glanced up at her partner-in-crime with a conspiratorial grin across her face.

“Hug me. Hurry— make it good.” He did as he was told, looping an arm around her waist and cradling her head to his chest. “When you hear the door open, back up.”

A few more seconds passed before they heard the long slide of the glass door as Azriel pulled it open. Cassian made a show of tensing and pulling away quickly, clearing his throat. Nesta shoved her hands into her back pockets as she had done several times over the course of the day when she was “caught” touching her rumored lover.

“Well, hey guys. How’s it going?” Azriel asked with a cocky, sideways smile.

Cassian mumbled something about needing the restroom and quickly fled the premises, leaving Nesta to brave Azriel alone. He’d definitely be paying for that one.

“Good. I needed a little break from outside. Got a little overwhelmed with all the hustle and bustle.”

”Mm. Understandable,” he replied, grabbing another beer from the fridge and turning toward her. “What was all that about? With Cass?”

”What was what?”

“Nesta. All the hugging I had the misfortune of walking in on. What’s going on with you two?” He leaned back onto the counter, crossing one ankle over the other and putting his free hand in his front pocket.

It took her a second to gather her thoughts before she decided she didn’t particularly care for being the only flustered one around here. Additionally, she was annoyed that Azriel seemed so cocksure about his position, as if Nesta were totally oblivious to all the questioning he and Rhys had done earlier. Granted, as far as they knew, she was, but that was neither here nor there.

It was time for the tables to start turning, even if she hadn’t had the chance to discuss it with Cassian yet. However, if he were that concerned about it, he wouldn’t have completely abandoned her to deal with Azriel. He was along for the ride now and would have to go with the flow.

Azriel wasn’t one to be easily flustered, that much Nesta knew. She knew she wouldn’t be able to be incredibly subtle because he would see right through it. She also knew he wasn’t above continuing to point on the flaws in her logic if she were to get caught in that web. She had to be decisive, creative, and she had to commit.

She walked over a little closer to him, facing him and propping her hip on the counter next to where he was leaning. She looked up into his face, and he eyed her suspiciously, an apprehensive look dawning over his features. Perfect.

“So, that’s in then. You’ve cracked our code?” she asked quietly.

”I wouldn’t call what you two have a ‘code’, Nes.” Arrogant bastard. Any doubt or guilt she’d felt for deceiving her friends had officially dwindled to zero. Azriel’s response had served her in that way, at least. She inched slightly closer to him, running her fingertips from his forearm down to his wrist, where his hand met his pocket.

“Then you knew we were going to talk to you? What gave it away?” she whispered, looping her fingers around the sensitive underside of his wrist.

Azriel’s eyes widened, glancing to her hand and back up to her face quickly. She watched his throat bob as he swallowed.

”You hardly need my permission, Nesta,” he responded.

She brought her other hand to cup his shoulder, leaning into him a little more. She could feel his entire body tense as if moving too quickly would provoke her to attack. He took an extra long pull from his beer.

“I disagree. Cassian and I both insisted that we talk to you together.”

It was at that moment that her co-conspirator returned from his bathroom trip. She watched as he scanned the situation, noting her hands on Azriel’s arm and shoulder. He pulled his lips into a curious smile.

“The two of you look cozy. I thought we were talking to him together, sweetheart,” he said, playing off of the comment he’d overheard.

He moved to the spot on the other side of Azriel, shooting her a questioning look when Azriel’s attention was turned away from him. Nesta’s face gave nothing away as she let out a soft laugh, shaking her head at Cassian with affectionate exasperation.

“You took a little while, and I wasn’t sure when we would be able to get him alone again. I hadn’t said anything to him yet. Not without you.”

”Well, don’t let me stop you. By all means, love, carry on,” he said, using a flat palm gesture forward. He gave her a full smile in return, and she noted how much it softened his features. He truly was quite beautiful, in a rough, raw sort of way.

She peered up at Azriel, waiting until he looked down at her.

“You mentioned me and Cassian, but it’s not what you think. At least, not exactly.” He gave her a confused look. She decided to continue before she lost her nerve with this last-minute plan. She turned her gaze to Cassian for the briefest of seconds before looking back at Azriel.

“I don’t really know how to ask this properly, so I’m just going to go for it, I guess. I know you think we’re sleeping together and it’s some kind of secret. But honestly, we wouldn’t care to be secretive about just us. We’re adults. But, we wanted to be respectful of you in the event you were okay with this.”

She could see Cassian hanging on her every word beside Azriel, just as naive to what she was going to suggest. She took a breath before finishing in a low rasp, sounding way more confident than she felt. It was all for the mission, she told herself.

“We wanted to know if you’d join us, Az.” She watched as his eyes nearly popped out of his head, hurrying to finish. “I know, I know. Probably out of nowhere, but we agreed we would give you some time to think. And it doesn’t have to be an ongoing thing if you want to try and see how it goes. No hard feelings either way, seriously.”

She moved her gaze to meet Cassian’s, whose hazel eyes were also threatening to launch from their sockets. He mastered himself quickly, his timing perfect, since Azriel was snapping his head toward him.

”What the fuck is happening? What the fuck is this?” He was looking back and forth between them, begging for an explanation or an escape route.

Nesta feared that maybe she had made an executive call that Cassian wasn’t good with carrying through. To her surprise, he lifted one of his large hands to cup Azriel’s cheek, keeping his face turned toward him.

”Az, it’s okay.” He subtly rubbed his thumb over Azriel’s cheek, and Nesta had to bite her cheek to keep from giggling. “You don’t have to say anything now. It’s just... I trust you. And if I’m going to do this, it makes the most sense for it to be with someone who knows me like you do. Plus, you were first on Nesta’s list.”

She shot him a heated glare, knowing he was throwing her under the bus as revenge for keeping him out of the loop. She supposed she had earned that.

Azriel shot from his position, walking to the other side of the kitchen. He set his beer down and braced both of his large hands on the countertop. His head was hanging forward as he took deep breaths, and they heard him mutter a low, “What the fuck?”

Nesta and Cassian had both oriented toward him, their backs now toward the counter. They were standing shoulder to shoulder, Cassian with his hands in his pockets and Nesta with her arms crossed. She grabbed her drink she’d refilled earlier to take a sip before offering some to Cassian.

Ariel’s head lifted slightly as he fixed his gaze on the wall in front of him.

“Why do people always ask me to be part of their threesomes?” he whispered to no one in particular. Nesta and Cassian turned their heads toward each other, both of their brows raised in question. How often was this happening to Azriel?

He turned around to face them again, his brown furrowed in concentration.

“Az, don’t overextend yourself for our benefit,” Cassian joked. “I didn’t realize we were two of many.”

”Fuck off, Cass.” He rubbed his temples in impatience. “Can I ask, why me?”

Nesta didn’t miss a beat. They’d tortured him enough, and she was ready to reveal the truth.

“Well, seeing as you and Rhysand feel so comfortable as to insert yourselves into other’s affairs, we figured you may appreciate a front-row seat,” she replied dryly.

Cassian snorted a laugh and looked down at her with something like admiration. He bumped her shoulder with his for good measure.

“You’re messing with me?” Azriel demanded incredulously. Cassian broke out into a full laugh at that.

“Indeed. Nothing gets by you, Az,” he responded.

”We have been all day,” Nesta interjected. “You two were quick to lean in to your theory.” She couldn’t hide her laugh this time.

Azriel stood there, dumbfounded and speechless. His eyes scanned both of their faces and darkened as he noted their amusement.

“What the hell is wrong with you? You can’t just go around asking people to join you in threesomes!”

”Don’t be upset, man. You’ll always be my first choice,” Cassian teased.

Azriel’s eyes locked onto his, showing a strong promise of violence if this conversation didn’t change direction.

“Oh, stop it. Both of you. Cassian, stop antagonizing Azriel. And you.” She pointed her finger to where Azriel stood. “You think I didn’t know about you and Rhysand’s little theories about me and Cassian? All because we dared be nice to each other?”

She gave him a chance to respond. He didn’t.

“I’ve seen every single smirk you two have exchanged anytime we were within 10 feet of each other, so sure that you were right about us. We fed every bit of it to you on a platter, and you were too quick to believe what you wanted. Well, let this,” she gestured with her finger in a circle, “be a reminder that things aren’t always as they seem. And stop theorizing on your friend’s sex life. You know better than anyone that his arrogance would have him giving you the details for less than this.”

“Hey!” Cassian complained. “I’m on your side.”

Azriel lifted both of his hands in surrender, breathing a low chuckle before he spoke.

“I don’t know whether I’m more relieved by the truth or pissed off that you two did this to us all damn day. But either way, you’re right, Nesta. It’s really not our business, and we’ve been know-it-all little pricks all day long. I’m sorry. Truly.” He moved forward, holding out his arms in offer of a group hug. They accepted, Nesta gripping each of them around the waist and Cassian wrapping around both of their shoulders.

Just before they let go, Cassian nuzzled his face into Azriel’s neck, earning a curse from Azriel as he playfully pushed him away. Nesta threw her head back in a laugh, relieved, yet disappointed, that their game had come to an end.

——————————————————————————

Later that evening, what remained of their little gathering had moved inside to continue the festivities. Someone had suggested Twister, and Cassian had offered to referee and work the spinner. He was way too fucking big for this game.

“Right hand, blue!” he called.

He watched as his friends scrambled to find the closest blue space, bickering as if it were life or death. He laughed as he watched Rhysand and Nesta battle over the same blue space. The latter ended up sprawled on her ass by the time the turn was over. She huffed her frustration and landed a firm poke to Rhysand’s ribs before stalking over to the couch by Cassian.

“Cheap shot, demon witch,” Rhysand called after her. The masked affection in his tone was obvious, but she shot him a vulgar gesture all the same.

“Don’t be a sore loser, sweetheart,” he teased, as she plopped down on the couch next to him. “You got yours earlier tonight when Azriel filled him in on our ruse.”

“That’s totally different,” she insisted.

He called out the next position, watching intently for any foul play. He heard her quiet voice from next to him and had to fight the urge to turn to her.

“You know, I had a lot of fun with you today,” she said.

“I did, too. We made a good team,” he replied.

He rested a hand above her knee absent-mindedly, pulling it away just as quickly to flick the spinner for the next turn. Apparently, their day of shenanigans had lowered any reservations he had about making physical contact with her. His palm seemed to burn slightly where he’d touched her.

“Right foot, green!” he called.

She dropped her voice just a bit lower so that only he could hear over the mixed sounds in the room.

“Did it make you even a little curious? I guess all that pretending had me thinking of what it would be like if we...” she trailed off.

He couldn’t fight his glance at her this time. He took note of her bottom lip between her teeth and the slight blush across her cheeks. That was the second time tonight that he had been struck dumb by how beautiful she was.

He fought to turn his face away from hers to initiate the next turn. He called out the next position before answering her as nonchalantly as possible.

“Curiosity hit me well before tonight, sweetheart.” His heart thundered slightly at the admission.

Out of the corner of his eye, he watched as she reached for his phone on the cushion between them. She handed it to him when she was prompted with the lock screen, and he mindlessly typed in his code. She worked for a second, locked his phone, and placed it back into its original position before reaching for her own.

He had to settle a disagreement between Mor and Feyre about hand placement before he was able to turn his attention back to Nesta. Why the fuck had he ever volunteered for this?

He unlocked his phone to see that his messaging app was open. There was an outgoing message to a number he didn’t recognize. Upon opening it, all the message said was, “Cassian.”

He glanced over at Nesta, watching as she stopped typing and locked her own phone. Within seconds, his phone vibrated with an incoming message from that unknown number. Nesta’s number.

He scanned the message, realization dawning on him within seconds. She’d sent him her home address followed by four simple words. “No pressure. No expectations.”

Before he could say anything at all, Nesta stood from the couch, reaching her arms over her head in a long stretch. His mouth went dry looking at the lines her body made as she did so.

“Alright, guys. It’s past my bedtime. I’m out,” she called as she blew kisses to her sisters.

She grabbed her things, slid her feet into her shoes, and made her way toward the door. She lingered for half a second to give Cassian a small smile. Just like that, she was gone, leaving Cassian to finish what seemed like it could be the longest Twister game in all of eternity.

——————————————————————————

Kind of already have a part 2 swimming around in my head for this one, so that may be a thing soon! 

Feel free to keep the prompts coming, and let me know if you have a particular pairing or mood in mind ☺️

If you’d like to be added to my tag list, you can comment, shoot me an ask, or reblog! I’ll be happy to add you!

Tags (Masterlist):

@polireader // @justgiu12 // @hizqueen4life // @sis-it-dont-add-up // @b00kworm // @bookstantrash // @gisellefigue08​ // @maastrash​ // @superspiritfestival // @girl-who-reads-the-books

[matan4il]

Hey there 😊 I love your meta and saw you saying something along the lines of you not being sure that the "lesson" Eddie is learning by dating Ana will already be learned by the end of 4b. Do you think they are going to drag the EddieAna relationship into season 5? I'm pretty convinced that they won't, so while the lasting effects of it might make an appearance in season 5, Ana herself (hopefully) won't.

Thank you so much for this lovely compliment, Nonnie! That’s so sweet of you! And honestly, IDK how they’ve chosen to deal with s4 having been cut short (assuming it is indeed 14 eps instead of 18, but it seems semi-confirmed at this point). One option would be to rush storylines so the season ends where it was originally meant to, but then the story telling takes a hit, while another option is to cut some less important stuff and whatever you still can’t fit in this season, leave for the next one, with the down side being you have to rethink how you frame the season, what’s the cut off point and how will that influence the starting point and arcs of s5. My guess would be that originally Eddie and Ana weren’t meant to last beyond s4, but with the pandemic, who knows? If they decide to go for the latter, ‘coz it means a smaller drop in the quality of story telling, even if it means re-framing the seasons, then Ana might overstay her intended moment of goodbye. I’d really like Eddie and her to break up before this season ends, but they may not. Either way, so far even the global pandemic hasn’t given Ana’s character and her relationship with Eddie more substance or made the writers actually care and invest in them, so even if we do meet her again in s5, I tend to think she’ll only be there for a short time, to wrap things up. Hope this helps, Nonnie? Have a good day! xoxox

Hi!! I love love love your blog. All of your metas and replies are so insightful and I can’t wait for your metas to return with 4b 😌 I feel like fandom life has clouded my understanding of this topic so im sorry if this is a stupid question but I’m hoping you can help clarify! Did Eddie ever explicitly say or imply that he doesn’t want to be called Edmundo, specifically? Because I thought in that conservation with Buck after Eddie joined the 118, he was against being called Diaz. “Anyone ever call you Diaz?” “Not if they expect me to respond.” But some of the fandom kind of makes it seem like he is against being called Edmundo so I’m wondering if perhaps I just missed or forgot something from the show? Don’t get me wrong, I am fully against EddieAna and the way she says his name gives me the heebie jeebies. I want them to go down like a lead balloon, but I just want to make sure my negative feelings for her regarding this topic are actually because of canon and not fandom 😂 (regardless, I will still strongly dislike her and I am a firm believer in using the names people prefer to be called. He introduced himself as Eddie, so GIRL.....c’mon). Anyway, I’m rambling at this point. Thank you in advance for even considering to answer this ask, I hope you have a great day!!

Nonnie, this is too sweet! Thank you so much! And awwww, I can’t wait to be posting for you my weekly metas again, either. But hey, I’ll be writing and posting some meta as long as there are asks coming in, so I’m still here for you! *HUGS*

Oh, it’s always good to know what’s canon and what’s not, even if the interpretation is valid and you personally adopt it. So, in 201, Bobby teases Buck that Eddie likes to be called ‘Eight Pack’, but that’s probably just a tease. Later Buck asks Eddie if people ever call him ‘Diaz’ and he replies "Not if they want me to respond.” Yet we know from 304 that Lena did call him Diaz and he did respond. So it might have been that he wanted to prevent a situation where everyone comes to know him as Diaz, ‘coz he prefers Eddie, but he’s not actually that offended by Diaz. Buck insists in 201 that Eddie needs a nickname and Eddie just asks if Buck’s serious. In 312, Ana calls him ‘Mr. Diaz’ and he responds that it’s Eddie, then goes to explain it’s short for... and she completes “Edmundo.” In 406, when they meet again, he introduces himself as, “Eddie Diaz” and she replies with “Mr. Diaz, Edmundo.” In 408, she once again calls him Edmundo.

I would say, given all of this together, that he prefers being called Eddie, but he doesn’t actually throw a fit if he’s called something else. So is she being disrespectful in not addressing him that way? On the one hand, he never actively invited her to call him Edmundo. On the other, he also never expressed an objection to it. Personally, it feels like in 406 she’s trying to convey a sense of familiarity right away that I didn’t like, even if Eddie didn’t express his own objection, and by 408, I just thought about the fact that this is canonically the name of both their grandfathers. I... do not wanna call a person I’m dating by the name of my grandparent. So I personally don’t like it, but I think it’s a bit of an ambiguous thing and open to interpretation whether it’s full on disrespectful or not. I hope this helped? Have a great day! xoxox

Hey I just noticed that you post metas on the ao3 as well. i don't want you to get reported for it since meta is not allowed. hope you understand, just wanted to warn you!

Hi Nonnie, if this was sent with good intentions, then thank you for them! I appreciate kindness in whatever shape it takes. AO3 is for all forms of fanwork. Meta has been recognized as one of those and has been allowed on AO3 for several years now. I find it important to say to anyone seeing this post: even if you have good intentions, before you send an ask like this, please take an extra minute and check what the rules are. Let’s say I were an insecure newbie, taking this ask at its word without checking. I might have deleted all my meta from AO3 before finding out that it was actually allowed there. This would have meant a lot of time and work gone down the drain. And I might not have had the energy to start re-posting once I realized it was okay. Which would have been a shame, because there are AO3 readers who don’t have a Tumblr and are interested in meta! Not many that I’ve come across, but they exist and it would have been a pity for them to miss out on fan content they were interested in. Hope you have a good day! xoxox

[gra-sonas]

Hey! I hate to ask this, you already do so much for us! But would you mind just a tiny recap of Vlamis’ live from last night? You don’t have to go into a ton of detail or anything, I just saw that it was a half hour long. I have a weird anxiety thing that keeps me from watching lives and stories for the most. Still haven’t even been able to work myself up to watching the vlamburn one as much as I’d love to! 🙁

Either way, thank you for everything!

Okay, nonnie. I went and watched the whole thing again and wrote you a detailed account of what’s been said. I’ll link the live again, then you can watch here if you want to. Or not. Up to you. 🤗 Hope this helps. 💕

Brushing his teeth and flossing for 3 minutes while talking.

800 new follower lately “where have you been before?”

“Do you do anything to your hair at night?” He adds Moroccan hair oil in the morning, nothing at night.

“What’s your favorite of the drop?” He hasn’t seen everything from the drop (like the COSMIC tie-dye) bc he’s in Santa Fe. He loves the COSMIC and MALEX embroidered things (“so subtle”) bc they are in Vlamburn’s handwriting, he loves the Manesqueeze shirt bc you can make Alex and Michael kiss by putting your wrists together. He *loves* the candle (there’s one burning on his bedside table), the silky PJs are great, but he can’t decide on just one favorite thing.

“How’s Jesa’s sanity?” She needs like 3 weeks of sleep. He explains, that while we *are* the Vlambase, the Vlambase merch company’s just Jesa and Vlamis. Jesa has a team, but all the day-to-day things, ideas, emails/customer service (Jesa), the newsletter (Vlamis). They hadn’t collaborated with anyone before Tyler, so working with him was a new experience. 

One fan mentions how they wanted to buy stuff but couldn’t. Vlamis says that he’s been there, and when he wanted something in the past he couldn’t afford, he started putting away a Dollar a day. 

“Thought on One Direction?” Vlamis is a Harry Styles guy. “Harry Styles’ swagger is next level!”

“What do you think about Russia? Will Vlambase merch be available here?” Talks a bit about how annoying things are with shipping companies, says they wanted to protect themselves for the holidays, and now that the Christmas rush is over, some shipping options have become available again. 

“Who came up with  MANESQUEEZE” He ponders about it, and settles on Jesa. It was Vlamis’s ides to put tiny Alex and tiny Michael on the sleeves so that they can kiss tho. And Tyler came up with the idea to put a “toupee” on his head (in a previous drop, the NEVER LOOK AWAY design had tiny Alex and tiny Michael on the sleeves, but poor Alex was bald) for the design.

Someone got a MALEX pin and the candle. He knows the pin sold out fast, and he feels bad about that. They want everyone to get everything they want, but it’s difficult to make proper calculations how well an item will sell. The pandemic made things even harder. Like the PJ sets. Normally, they would wait until the sale ends and see how many sets were actually ordered, but during the pandemic, stock listings have been changing dramatically from day to day, so they had to pre-order the PJs and robes to make sure they had a certain number at their disposal. He said that they “overshot” on a couple of things, but ultimately sales have been great, and he appreciates that.

“I’m excited to make the MANESQUEEZE doodles kiss bc I do that with the NEVER LOOK AWAY shirt” Vlamis jumps up and shows his closet that’s full of Vlambase merch items.

“Why am I here, it’s almost 3am” He mentions that he’s been staying up until 4 in the past couple of days, but he has to be on set in 7 or 8 hours. 

“Hello, just wanted to let you know that I got a tattoo for you” Vlamis asks for a photo and to be tagged.

“Kyle the packer [Vlamis’s roomie KA, who works in the warehouse when a new drop is ready for shipping]” Vlamis says they’re working him to death.

“Please save this live” He doesn’t know whether he’ll save it. Thinks the one with Tyler was important, but since it’s just him, he doesn’t think it’s important.

“I followed Jesa, Jesa is the real MVP” Vlamis says that Jesa is “a beast, and best in the game”. Quickly explains who Jesa is, and that she’s his partner in the Vlambase merch company. He mentions that she recently called him with an idea for Valentine’s Day, and he was like “Jesa, we need to relax!” But she loved the idea. She’s a big fan of RNM and the characters (and Tyler). “Jesa’s amazing.”

“What about new Soli art [Soli’s the artist who created the Boys Will Be Boys art for a previous drop]?” Vlamis smiles. “What about new Soli art. I like that idea. 😏“

“Your house [in New Mexico] is so cute.” Vlamis says thank you and shows the ceiling of the house (which he likes best). “Santa Fe is dope!”

“I adore your teeth” *shows his teeth* Says he had to wear braces (some even adjustable)

“I could’ve used my birthday money to buy something but I forgot” 🤨 << Vlamis’s face. “How you you forget, man?”

“Back to Twitter after this live” He mentions that he’d just been on Twitter before the live.

He got retweeted by Mountain Dew and loves it.

“I’m from Australia and hope my merch arrives before winter” Vlamis says he hopes shipping will be fast. 

“Love the Valentines” They’re not actually Valentines, hence they’re “Love Notes”.  Vlamis considers doing them not just around Valentine’s Day. 

“You catch any of the CW shows returning this month?” “Might have to” But he knows what he’ll be catching on the 12th. “Prodigal Son, baby!”

“Where did you get the Game Boys?” Those are his Game Boys. He has a Game Boy Advanced and a Game Boy Color. 

“How do you feel about Forlex?” *scoffs* 😒 “Yeah” 

“So excited for the robe!” Vlamis gets excited. “The robes and the PJs are so comfy!” Talks about how it’s a bit weird, bc they don’t make them themselves.

Several people mention that their closet looks like his closet bc of all the merch and he loves that. 

“How do you feel about Forlex” *gets agitated* “Why are you asking me this? Don’t do that to me, alright?” *softer* “Don’t do that.”

“How are you doing?” He’s doing very well. Very relieved that eh sale went well. This drop was like 3-4 months of work, the night before the sale felt like an entire month, too. Jesa and Vlamis Facetimed for more than 5hrs. They set up the website, and that’s how the glitch with the GIVE ME MALEX OR GIVE ME DEATH shirts and poster happened. They made a mistake and only noticed after the website went live. 

“Do you know when S3 will air?” No, he thought it might’ve been sooner, but apparently not.

“I love your poetry from the last drop so why no poems this time?” He writes poems when he’s inspired, he hasn’t written a poem in a while. He’s currently preparing to direct his first movie in June 2021, and he’s been very focused on that. 

“The Meet & Greet day changed.”  Filming schedule changed bc they had snow, the schedule’s changing constantly. He’ll be set all day tomorrow (well, today, Jan 11) from 8am until 8 or 9pm. Sometimes they might even wake up in the morning and learn that the schedule’s been changed. 

 “You could talk about nothing and we’d still watch.” He doesn’t want to talk about nothing, wonders if anyone has any questions about the sale.

“I’m so excited about the robe. I was going to buy more but I’m broke.” He says we should be responsible.

Someone’s still waiting about their Black Friday stuff, but he says it’s the shipping company, not them. 

“Vlamentines" He *loves* that, thinks it’s a good pun. 

“Gotta support Aurora.” Always. 🥰

“Jealous Guerin in S3?” You’ll see, you’ll see.

“I placed 3 orders, last one last night. Give me Malex or give me death.” He loves it. He also mentions, that they’re working hard on figuring out how to combine orders in the future so people don’t have to pay for shipping several times. They just can’t do that logistically at the moment. 

“Real talk, how often do you check your DMs?” He says, that some people might’ve noticed that he occasionally likes random photos on people’s IG pages. When that happens, it’s a sign that he read someone’s DM. He feels bad when he checks his mentions with a delay, and people’s stories have already vanished after 24hours. He sometimes doesn’t get to checking DMs for a week.

“Will we ever get the original pic of the kiss recreation?” *smiles* *waggles his eyebrows* “Maybe in the morning”

“So happy the Trevor Project was chosen for this merch drop!” He’s very happy, too. According to him, it was a no-brainer. Tyler’s worked with them in the past, so it made even more sense. They wanted to make sure that Tyler felt very strongly about wherever they’d be donating. 

People urge him to go to sleep. “You want me to go to bed?” 

“Why is your merch not available in India?” *deep breath* “It should be, it’s ridiculous. Unbelievable.”

“Your poetry was awesome.” He appreciates the praise and promises to write some more poetry. 

Someone asks whether the movie he’ll be directing in June will be a comedy, but he says it’s the opposite. He’s mentioned in the past that Aurora and him will both act in the movie, but apparently he forgot about that. He doesn’t want to jinx the movie and doesn’t know how much he should reveal just yet. Talks a bit about 5 Years Apart. 

Someone mentions that it’s Jeanine’s birthday on January 14th. 

“Do (or don?) a face mask, Vlamis.” He refuses. Mentions his friend and roommate Spencer Waldner, who makes face masks.

“If there’s leftover merch, will you do another sale?” He says that most things are actually sold out bc they use Blank Clo’s blanks and will only make what’s been ordered.  They might try to restock some pins tho, bc they went so quickly. 

“USPS are a joke” He defends them. “They’re a public service, they’re trying hard, guys.”

“You should do a Vlambase drop with the Real Vlamis [a.k.a. Jeanie]” He’s excited and thinks it’s a good idea and asks if anyone’d be interested. 

Someone congratulates him on directing his first movie. He points out that he’s directed before (Making It, a 3-part web series, it’s on YouTube).

 “Would you ever come to Australia Comic Con?” He’d love to. Mentions that he’s supposed to be in Paris in May for a convention, but he’s not sure whether that’s gonna happen considering how things are currently going with the pandemic. 

Some more talk about 5 Years Apart.

Circles back to doing a merch drop with Jeanine. People like the idea. 

“Please save this live.” After an IG update, things have changed and he doesn’t know how to do it. In the past he had the option to save it [for 24hrs], now he can only upload it to IGTV. 

“$30 shipping to Australia hurts my soul but I did it anyway.” He appreciates that and mentions, that he lived in Australia for 6 months in the past.

“Sing some Bright Eyes” He thinks his singing would hurt people’s ears. 

Jesa Joy pops up in the chat and urges him to go to bed. 

“Jesa is yelling at you.” Vlamis says that Jesa’s a “yeller”, and that she has a tattoo that says “Don’t yell tho”. He admits that Jesa often yells for a good reason. “I need to be yelled at sometimes.”

Someone asks him to accept a request to join his live. He says he’s pretty tired. 

He says hello to someone from Germany (not me btw :P) “What’s up, Germany ✌️” 

More people ask him to sing, but he says he cannot sing. He says it’s not like a joke  or him being modest, he straight up can’t sing and is a horrible singer. 

“Will there be a sequel to 5 Years Apart?” Maybe a sequel called “10 Years Apart” (he’s joking and visibly tired)

“Should I buy anything before the sale ends?” Yes.

Jesa Joy’s from Michigan, and Vlamis’s grandma’s from Middlesborough, Kentucky.

“Is Tyler singing again?” He doesn’t know. “I hope so. Love that kid’s voice” (Tyler’s 3.5 years older than Vlamis :P)

He’s getting sleepy and will read a little bit before bed. Considers drinking some Mountain Dew. 

“Do you take design ideas.” Sure. Sometimes he sees design ideas from people they’ve been working on for months, but he’s gonna “steal” an idea from someone, he’ll tell them. He’ll steal it, though. 

“Are you still reading SAGA?” He read the first one and is half-way through the second. He’s currently reading a book called “My First Movie” by Stephen Lowenstein. “How cliché.” Aurora got it for him.

Purple Skittles are his favorite. Purple everything.

“Your girlfriend’s the best girlfriend.” She is, she really is.

Asks Jesa Joy whether he should go to bed now.Even though it’s late, he’s hungry. Considers eating something. People tell him to go to bed.

He asks “Should I get naked and put on the PJs?” *waggles eyebrows* “I’M KIDDING, YOU’RE SICK. YOU’RE ALL DISGUSTING.” xD

“Don’t eat!” He laughs.

Says goodbye and says that Jesa’s posted a surprise picture. 

“Any advice for aspiring actors?” Tells them to make their own stuff bc no one’s gonna hire them. (He’s being sarcastic). “It’s dark, but it’s what you need to hear.”

“Okay, love you guys. Thank you again! It was our best sale yet. Means a lot to me. Means a lot to Tyler. Us doing so well might mean that Tyler will work with us again. So I really appreciate it. Okay, I love you all.”

Jesa promises to post the pic in 4 minutes. He’s excited. “See, I got her to do it! The picture is kind of ridiculous.”

*pretends to take off his shirt, stops halfway through* “Noooooo, noooooo, noooooo!”

*throws kiss* “Love you guys, good night.”

[artlessictoan]

Uhh is it possible for you to do a yodocho thing? Where yodo is kinda butch and chocho is the fem one and yodo is trying to ask her out but they keep getting interupted by like family and friends?

boy howdy is that possible nonny dear! sorry it tookso long to finish this but jfc 5000 words ofc it’s the yodocho one that ends up this long but it was an absolute blast to write so thank you for blessing me with this prompt!

(requests open)

(ao3 mirror)

---

“Maaan, haven’t been here in so long, this place looksexactly the same.”

Yodo rolled her eyes – the thing that never changed was herfriend’s reaction every time she came over to her house – but helped Chouchou bringin the many bags of luggage she’d brought with her. The woman had claimed she’dpacked light for this trip, but Yodo couldn’t imagine how she’d ever manage togo through so many outfits in just a week.

Without bothering to wait for Yodo to shed her extra layers,she bounded up the stairs, already on a bee-line to Yodo’s room.

“Oi, wait up!” She struggled with fabric, finally justthrowing it on the floor for someone else to pick up later. Or for her dad tonag her into doing it herself. Whichever came first.

By the time she caught up to Chouchou, she was almost to herroom, but had stopped at the open door to the Kazekage’s study. With the kindof brazen disrespect that he somehow managed to inspire in a lot of kids andteenagers, she waved at him and practically screamed, “Hey Uncle Gaara, thanksfor having me!”

He nodded and gave a brief smile – the only kind he wasreally capable of, but no one thought less of him for it. “Of course, it’salways a pleasure to see you.”

They passed by his office and got almost three feet beforehe poked his head around the door and called after them, “Do you want me tobring you anything?”

“No thanks papa, we had lunch before we got home.”

Despite her words, he trailed after them, with the kind ofslightly anxious twitchiness he always had whenever a guest came over. “Are yousure?” he asked, respectfully staying in the hallway when they got to Yodo’sroom. “You don’t want anything to drink at least? I can-”

“We’re fine, just call us when dinner’s ready,” shesaid, shutting the door before he could continue pestering them.

Leaning against it until she was happy that he had walkedback to his study, she let out a sigh before turning around. Chouchou hadalready made herself at home, flopping down on Yodo’s bed face-first, her luggagedropped carelessly on the floor.

She elected to leave it there – she didn’t like tidying upher own shit, she wasn’t about to start doing it for someone else’s – andinstead took a flying leap on top of her friend.

Chouchou grunted, but didn’t scream, which was a littledisappointing.

“Ugh, knew something like that was coming, you’re such achild,” she said, twisting her head enough to glance up at the weight attachedto her back.

Yodo snorted, but shifted so that she was just leaningagainst her. “You love it,” she mumbled, seeing if she could rest her headagainst her friend’s back in such a way that she could hear her heartbeat. Shehad to wonder if her closeness would be appreciated if Chouchou knew about thereal depth of her feelings towards her.

It was weird, they’d been best friends since the moment themet, they roughhoused all the time, Chouchou had never been shy about pokingand prodding and tickling whenever Yodo let her guard down and none of that hadever bothered her before – well, except the tickling. That was just cruel – butthen she hit eighteen and realised that holy shit Chouchou was smokin’ hotand she was suddenly beset by feelings that she had not been prepared for inthe slightest. They had turned what would once have been a friendly,comfortable interaction into something at once exhilarating and filled with anunexplainable tension.

The gentle tapping immediately derailed her train ofthought. She leapt to her feet before she could be accused of something.

Gaara’s head appeared around the door, a tray hoveringbeneath it. “Here, I’ve brought you some tea.”

“I said we didn’t need anything!”

If he noticed her suspiciously loud voice, he didn’t mentionit, instead just calmly saying, “Well, I still thought I should make yousomething, just in case,” as the tray floated into the room, supported by a platformof sand.

She groaned, long and loud, until it was carefully set down.“Ok, fine, can you go away now?” Because she was embarrassed enough around Chouchouwithout adding parental interference into the mix.

Her father levelled her with a heavy stare.

“…Thank you for the tea,” she muttered, trying to sound moredefiant than she really felt.

He smiled in that way that always managed to make her feelbetter, no matter how annoying he could sometimes be. “You’re welcome.”

The door clicked shut, leaving the two girls alone oncemore.

Chouchou immediately began snickering, as she grabbed a cup.“Chill, girl, what’re you acting so weird for? I don’t mind Uncle Gaara hangingaround.”

She puffed her cheeks out, before stalking over to the bedand sitting heavily next to her. “He still treats me like a little kid, eventhough I’m legally an adult now!” Maybe if she wasn’t pouting, her words wouldn’thave had her friend snorting unashamedly.

“Well, to be fair, you can be pretty immature,” she eventuallymanaged to say, easily dodging the fist swung at her head, “but, you’ve grownup a lot these past few years, I’m so proud of you.”

“You’re the worst, you know that?”

For a moment, something in Chouchou’s eyes changed, a flashof emotion too fleeting to pin down, leaving Yodo all the more unsteady for it.Before she could question what was wrong though, a sly little smirk spreadacross purple-painted lips. “Is that what you really think?” she asked,voice suddenly low and husky and if she didn’t know better, she might call it seductive– that was certainly the effect it was having on her.

She might’ve been able to make a snappy retort, except Chouchouhad chosen this exact moment to cross her legs, causing her skirt toriiide up, exposing juuust enough gloriously muscled thigh to shut down everyone of her higher functions.

She didn’t even notice the door opening again, until a softvoice directly behind her blew away the fog in her brain.

“Kankuro made some snacks earlier, I forgot to bring them upwith the-”

Her neck cracked at the speed with which she spun around. “DAD!”

“Yes?”

The grin stretching across her face felt like it was goingto tear her face apart, even her dad looked a little uncomfortable at seeingit. “Thank. You. Now please leave us alone.”

He quickly dropped the plate in his hands next to the tea he’dbrought up earlier, then extracted himself from the room. She listened out forhis footsteps to completely disappear, taking the opportunity to catch herbreath and try to calm down her short-circuiting brain, before finally turningback around, to face Chouchou’s perfect legs and devastating smirk.

How had she been so oblivious to Chouchou’s beauty for somany years?

“You know, you didn’t answer my question,” she said, in thatvoice that left warm trails dancing across her entire body, “am I really theworst?”

“N-no, ‘course not.” Wow, suddenly she couldn’t be more thankfulthat her dad had brought up tea, because her mouth had never been so drybefore. Hands shaking just slightly, she poured herself a cup and downed half ofit. “I was just jokin’ around.”

Her eyes were still fixed on the delicious expanse ofexposed skin however.

Chouchou followed her gaze with sharp, amber eyes, grinwidening when she glanced back up. “Yodo~ where are you looking that’s so interesting?”

“Nowhere!”

She then had the absolute gall to lean forward,framing her chest between her arms. “Oh? You don’t see anything you like?”

This… was too much, even for a joke. Chouchou’s actions werefar too deliberate to be unintentional and too extreme to be a prank – Yodo wasthe one with the mean streak and even she wouldn’t mess with someone’s feelingslike this – was it possible that her best friend’s feelings weren’t entirelyplatonic either?

“Do- do you-” was she actually thinking this? Was sheactually going to ask something so dangerous? There must be somethingvery, very wrong with her. “Do you, maybe, li-”

“Chouchou, is there anything you would like to have fordinner?”

“FUUU-”

“Yodo. Language.”

“-UUUG! I was gonna say fug.”

The look on Gaara’s face suggested that he didn’t believeher for a second, but he let it slide and turned once more to their guest.“Well, Chouchou? You can ask for anything you like.”

Yodo silently fumed as her friend lit up and began mullingover her options. Was he doing this on purpose? He had to be, surely, how elsecould he have such perfectly terrible timing. And Chouchou’s dark, alluring airhad evaporated, leaving behind her usual cheerful self and leaving Yodo towonder if she’d somehow slipped into a dream back there and had just beenbrought crashing back into reality by her dad’s determination to be a goodhost.

And she wasn’t sure if she should be enraged, or grateful.

Eventually, after much thought, Chouchou settled on a porkstew and Gaara was sent away to buy the necessary ingredients. And now that hewas finally out of the picture for at least thirty minutes, Yodo could finallyconfess in peace.

Just as she was taking a slow, steadying breath however,Chouchou opened her own mouth. “So anyways, what was it you were gonna ask?”she asked, chipper and completely innocent, as though the last five minuteshadn’t even happened.

With her cheeks flaming, Yodo stomped over to the plate of snacksand tried to swallow four at once. “Forget it!” she snapped through hermouthful. “The moment’s gone forever.”

A fine, red eyebrow raised, but Chouchou didn’t question heron it, just grabbed some nibbles for herself before they were completely demolished.“Ok then, so what do you wanna talk about? Been on any cool missions lately?”

She took the change of topic with both hands and ran withit, immediately rambling on about how her brothers had nearly ruined their lastdisaster aid assignment.

But an idea had been planted and she wasn’t going to let itgo so easily.

---

Ok, today, she was going to say it. She had a plan, she hada good feeling, this time would be the one.

She had already dragged Chouchou out with her to one of thefew parts of the city with some real greenery – though not her own garden,despite it being prettier, she’d had enough trouble with her dad yesterday; noway was she going through that again – she had spent half the nightlying away coming up with a perfect script and she had buttered Chouchou upwith this morning’s breakfast – she’d gotten up super early just to make atraditional Sunan spread, with a wide range of homemade breads, jams, cheeses,fruits, eggs and soup.

Suna folk did nothing by halves.

And she wasn’t gonna half-ass her confession either.

“It’s really cool you still get so many plants this time ofyear.” Chouchou was idly sniffing at some flowering cacti, her long, brightyellow dress making her stand out, even amongst the colourful flowers. Thelocation was a success, now it was for the important bit.

“Thought you might like it,” she said, waiting until herfriend was fully focused on her before continuing. “Hey, so, there’s somethingI’ve been wanting to talk to you about, something really important-” she hadn’teven got to the scary part and yet she could still feel the sweatrolling down the back of her neck “-see, a couple months ago something changed,I don’t really get it at all, but I-I, I mean you’re- that dress- hey, are youeven listening to me?”

She had to ask, because for the last twenty seconds,Chouchou’s gaze had been very much not on her, instead fixed on a point justabove her shoulder.

It was probably for the best; “I mean you’re that dress,”wasn’t a line likely to win anyone’s heart any time soon, but she how could shebe so distracted when she had put so much effort into making this perfect?

“Uh… why is your brother hiding in the bushes?”

“…What.”

Yodo spun around to glare in the direction that had socaptivated Chouchou’s attention and, indeed Shinki was lurking in theshadows; managing to look even creepier than usual. She tried to radiate asmuch ‘go away now’ energy as possible with her facial expression alone, but heremained unimpressed and unmoving.

She decided to barrel on past it. Sure, maybe her idealconfession scenario wouldn’t involve a family member ominously watching in thedistance, but as long as he stayed far away, he couldn’t possibly ruinanything. “Oooookaaaay, well, as I was saying-”

But her friend didn’t seem to hear her. Chouchou’s gaze wasutterly transfixed, she didn’t even seem able to blink. “…Now he’s giving me athumbs up.”

Right, this conversation could wait, she had a fratricide togo commit.

---

Kankuro’s snickering was a level of obnoxious that she’dnever experienced before.

“C’mon kid, it can’t be that difficult.”

She lifted her head enough to glower at him, then dropped itheavily back against the kitchen table. “You’re one to talk, have you ever eventried to ask someone out?”

He rolled his eyes. “You know I ain’t interested in thatshit, but I’m still better at flirting than you.”

As much as she’d like to disagree with him, she knew he waskind of right. Even if he wasn’t that invested, she had seen him do his thingat enough – otherwise dull – political events, to know that he was more than capableof finding hook-ups. Somehow. She still didn’t understand the appeal at all,but the fact that the only person she’d ever crushed on was a girl maybe explainedit.

She still had her pride to uphold however.

“Fuck off, I’m amazing at flirting!” She smirked whenshe heard the feet bouncing down the stairs, pushing herself out of her seatand slamming both hands down on the table with enough force to rattle the cupson it. “You’ll see, Chouchou’s on her way down and I’m gonna get her to go outwith me, right here, right now!”

Kankuro leaned forwards until their noses were nearlytouching, a wide, sinister grin exposing far too many of his teeth. “Do it then.”

“I. Will.”

Suddenly, Chouchou swept past them, mumbling a low, “Mornin’,”as she opened the fridge and began rooting around in it like she owned theplace. If she had noticed the weird staring contest between uncle and niece throughher grogginess, she had elected not to say anything.

Clearly she had just come from washing up; her hair was slightlydamp and messy curls had yet to be tamed, she hadn’t put on any makeup and she’dthrown on a robe without much thought.

Yodo had never been more attracted to anyone in her entirelife.

“Mornin’.” She glanced over to where Kankuro was waggling hiseyebrows at her, wordlessly daring her to prove him wrong. “Sooo… you got anyplans for today?” she asked, very distracted by the sweet, fruity scent waftingoff of her – a Konoha perfume most likely, Suna ones were generally muskier, withhints of the many spices grown in the region.

Chouchou blinked at her a few times as she took a slow sip ofjuice. “Girl, I’m here to see you, my plans are gonna be the same as yours.”

Out of the corner of her eyes, Yodo could see her uncle withholdinglaughter. She tried to ignore the blush creeping up her neck. “Right, right, duh,must still be half asleep,” she muttered, wonky smile forced upon her lips.

Her attempt at playing it off with a laugh was immediately ruinedby Kankuro blurting out, “You’ve been awake for an hour and a half already.”

She glared at him. He grinned at her.

He was gonna play dirty then, huh? Fine by her, she’d just haveto bring out the big guns, something so irresistible that Chouchou would practicallyfall into her arms before her uncle could ruin it. “So, you… dress good, huh?”

Every eye in the room dropped down to the decidedlyun-glamourous fluffy bathrobe she’d had to borrow from Araya – because Yodostill had to shop in the children’s section to find clothes that didn’tcompletely swamp her and Chouchou was over six foot of pure Woman.

It had a cute little duckling pattern on it.

The dam of Kankuro’s not-very-high restraint finally brokeand he started howling with laughter. “Woooow, smooth!”

“I know right? I’m amazed at how she manages to function ineveryday life,” Chouchou said, not bothering to hide her own amusement as shestarted sharing the story of that time a few years back that Yodo had beentrying so hard to forget about.

Entire body flaming red, she practically leapt out of theroom, yelling behind her as she stormed up the stairs, “You’re both jerks and Ihate you!”

---

She wasn’t sure why Araya had insisted on joining themtoday, they were just doing a little souvenir shopping for Chouchou’s friendsand family back home, hardly something he hadn’t seen before.

Though his presence was at least keeping her somewhatfocused on their task, rather than on how lovely Chouchou looked in that brightblue dress; which was very. Very, very lovely. So lovely that shedesperately wanted to remove it to see how much lovelier she looked underneath.

If this was what being in love felt like, she wondered how humansas a species had ever lasted this long.

Araya casually asked who they were shopping for first,immediately reminding her that she was in public and should really get her mindout of the gutter before she did or said something that would get them thrownout of the market and probably earn them a lecture on the importance ofrepresenting a village from the Kazekage.

To distract herself from her thoughts, she picked up alittle clay figurine, some kind of lion thing. “Inojin would probably like this,right?” It wasn’t exactly like his ink beasts, but it was close enough; he couldprobably do with some new ideas anyways.

Before she got any response from the one she’d actually beenasking however, Araya had leapt upon her, taking the object reverently in hishands and waved it in front of Chouchou’s eyes. “Wow, he’d love it! You’re sogood at this Yodo! Isn’t she amazing?” The smile hidden by his mask wasdefinitely made up for by the pure excitement in his voice.

“Hmm, I guess she’s pretty good, dunno that I’d go as far asamazing though.” Chouchou still took the lion though and wandered over to the stall’sowner to haggle.

Yodo took the opportunity to scrutinise her brother. “What’swith you today?”

“Nothing, at all,” he said, utterly failing to sound like hewasn’t lying – he’d never been very good at it in the first place.

“Mhmm.”

“Really, there’s absolutely nothing going on. C’mon, it lookslike she’s done, let’s go to a food stall next!” Quickly running off to grabChouchou’s hand, he dragged them both off.

And things continued being weird throughout the day; as theybrowsed the market for interesting trinkets and regional delicacies to sendback to Konoha, Araya took every opportunity – and several opportunities thatdidn’t actually exist – to praise Yodo to the high heavens, no matter howtrivial her actions. She normally wouldn’t mind, her ego was big enough that itcould take a little stroking every now and then, but everything about him todaywas just screaming ulterior motive and that could only mean bad thingsfor her.

Araya with a Plot was not someone to mess with and she wasfeeling very twitchy as a result.

So twitchy, that when she heard the slight hitch of breathbehind her, she immediately spun and caught the heavy weight that wasthreatening to fall on her.

It must’ve looked ridiculous, a six-foot-something giant,who was eighty percent leg, being held like a princess by a scrawny, five-foot-on-a-good-dayrunt.

Araya looked up at her and threw his arms around her neck.

“Oh, Yodo, my hero!” He was practically weeping now,catching the attention of more than a few passers-by. “Thank you so much, whoknows what would’ve happened if you hadn’t been here to catch me in yoursurprisingly strong arms! I’m sure you would be an amazing catch for anyone!”

She closed her eyes and counted to ten before dropping hisweight and letting him fall the whole five inches to the ground with a lightthud. Everyone around them looked either confused or amused, as she bent down,grabbed her brother’s ankles and wordlessly dragged him into the nearest dark,abandoned alleyway.

When they were sufficiently alone, she leaned over to glareat where his eyes should be; she might not be able to see his face through themask, but he could certainly see hers. And hopefully he would be rightfullyscared of it. “Ok, seriously, what the fuck.”

“I’m just trying to get Chouchou to see how cool you are, soshe’ll want to go out with you!” he said, arms gesticulating wildly, even as hewas lying on his back.

“What’s that got to do with you? I can take care of thismyself.”

He sighed and slowly pushed himself so he was sittingupright. “Look, I support you one hundred percent in everything – you’re thebest sister in the world – but you’re definitely going to screw this up if weleave you to your own devices, so we all agreed that you needed a hand toactually make this happen.”

“I’d be doing just fine if people didn’t keep distracting me-”she stopped, suddenly thinking back to everything that had happened the lastweek “-wait, we? You’re all in on this?”

“Well, Uncle was mostly just being himself and Dad was justgoing along with what Kankuro told him to do, but me and Shinki at least have yourbest interests at heart! He just thought it might be better to quietly supportyou from the sidelines while I think the more… direct approach would be better.”

Even if she’d wanted to respond to that, she couldn’t findthe words, so she just spun round and stomped out into the street whereChouchou was still waiting for them. “You guys done?”

“Yeah, let’s go.”

The peace lasted for all of five steps before Araya joggedup behind them and leaned down to whisper in Chouchou’s ear. “Yodo’s great, don’tyou think?”

“I can hear you and I don’t need your help,” she ground out,teeth practically cracking with the force of her strained grin. Was he reallyplanning to follow them around until she finally confessed? Sure, she hadn’tsucceeded so far, but she was just waiting for the right time!

She couldn’t see Araya’s expression behind the mask, but sheknew she didn’t like it. “Are you sure about that?”

“Chouchou, let’s go look over there.” Grabbing her friend’shand – and definitely not feeling a little giddy about it – she led her to aclothing stall, already eyeing up a beautiful, deep, ocean blue and gold scarfthat would look amazing against Chouchou’s dark skin.

Araya remained undeterred. “I know she can be very dense,and stubborn, and she’s pretty lazy and her dress sense is… distinctive-”

“This is what you call helping?” she snapped, bristlingat his tone of refined disdain.

Just because he didn’t appreciate her butch, punk fashionchoices, didn’t mean that she was a bad dresser. She was at least above herfather and uncle in the family style rankings. Which was a real thing; Shinki kepta constantly updated list in his desk.

“-but she has somegood qualities too! She’s fun cool and she always loyal to her friends andfamily, I bet she’d be a really great girlfrie-”

As much as she would love to just throttle him right now,she settled for grabbing his shoulders – mostly because she couldn’t actuallyreach his neck – and shaking vigorously until he shut up. “Go. Away. I’ve. Got.This.”

He carefully removed her hands and held them together betweenhis own. “Look you don’t have to do it yourself; it’d be less painful foreveryone if I just said it for you.”

“That ruins the whole point though!”

She could feel the Look, and she hated it. “Are you gonna doit yourself then?”

“I- wha- ye- no-” she looked around for someone to save her,unfortunately most of the civilians had grown bored of the show and returned totheir shopping, the only person still watching was Chouchou herself, gigglingsoftly, with her long hair shimmering in the sunlight. Swallowing a painfullump, she turned back to her brother, saying softly, “Look it’s hard, ok?”

“It doesn’t have to be, just be honest, I know that nothingbad will happen, trust me, you can do it, it’s really not so scary,” he said,tone gradually shifting from soft and encouraging to exasperated and critical, “I’veasked out tons of people before and I don’t get this worked up about it, reallyI thought you were the brave one-”

“God! Fine!” She spun round, pointed directly at her crushand yelled at the top of her voice, “CHOUCHOU YOU LOOK GREAT IN THAT DRESS BUT IT’DLOOK BETTER ON MY BEDROOM FLOOR! Are you happy now?!”

Chouchou stared at her, completely still for a second, then burstout laughing.

Loud, unashamed guffaws probably weren’t the ideal reactionto a pick-up line, but, listening back to her own words in her head, she couldunderstand how they’d gotten there. Still didn’t mean she couldn’t be offendedby it though.

“Hey, quit laughing! I’m tryna be serious here!”

Araya crossed his arms, shaking his head slowly, clearly notfar off of laughing himself. “And that’s the line you chose to be serious with?”

“Ok, you shut up you’re no help at all,” she said, elbowinghim in the stomach before snapping back to her friend, “and Chouchou stoplaughing at a girl when she’s bearing her soul! Can’t even get some respectwhile confessing, honestly…”

Slowly, Chouchou straightened up, wiping a tear from her eyeand pure delight still lighting her voice as she asked, “Yodo, are you sayingthat you like me?”

Fuck, how red was she right now? Had to be pretty bad if theburning of her skin was anything to go by – even the midday Suna sun felt coolby comparison. “Y-yeah, obviously,” she muttered, suddenly all too aware of howmany eyes were upon them again.

“Finally!”

She blinked expressionlessly at Chouchou. “Huh?”

“Girl, I’ve been trying to get you to admit you like me for months,I really thought I had a winner with that ridiculous seduction act when I firstgot here.”

“If you knew then why didn’t you just say something!” shespluttered, defaulting to her usual anger while she was waiting for the joy tokick in.

Amber eyes rolled, but she was still grinning widely. “I’vebeen in love with you since we were kids, I figured I’d let you stew for atleast a little while, get some revenge for you being an oblivious idiot.”Chouchou had liked her for that long? How had she not noticed?

More importantly, however. “Wait, so are we, like… datingnow?”

Closing the distance between them and leaning down, Chouchoustared deep into her eyes, mouth set in a hard line and brows furrowed heavily.“If you say you don’t want to after all this, I will literally throw you intothe middle of a sandstorm,” she said, before her warm smile returned and she lightlypecked her on the cheek.

“Ha, I win!” Araya immediately managed to ruin the momentwith his loud declaration.

Kankuro landed next to them with a thud; Yodo didn’t evensee where he came from. “I call foul! We never agreed that you could get sopersonally involved!”

Family members began appearing out of the aether, until theywere surrounded by her brothers, father and uncle. Her blood pressure shortthrough the roof.

“Exact terms were never agreed upon, it’s your fault forbeing so vague, so you have to pay up.”

Yodo felt all feeling drain from her body. “…Were you allbetting on this?” she asked, voice soft and chilling.

The sudden silence could’ve been cut with a rusty butterknife, it was so thick.

Araya was the first to attempt a response. “N-noooo,definitely not!”

“You just said that you won!”

“Which I’m still not accepting, by the way,” Kankuro cut in,earning twin glares from Yodo and Araya both.

“Ok I’m not surprised by you three-” she glared at her brothersand uncle, who looked varying shades of ‘not especially guilty’ “-but even youwere in on it, papa?” Yes, she was bringing out the big, watery, puppy-dog eyesand no, she didn’t feel bad about it.

“Kankuro said he had a plan to make you very happy and Ididn’t think to question him on it, I can only apologise.”

“My baby bro is a snitch! How could I let this happen, I’vefailed you, my brother…” Kankuro wailed, as though he wasn’t the main bad guyhere; Yodo had absolutely no doubt the whole bet was his idea and she would notbe letting it go unpunished. Though her dad’s look suggested that he wasdefinitely going to be dragging him off later to have a Chat with him first.

A heavy arm dropped across her shoulders and long hairtickled at her cheek as Chouchou leaned down to snicker in her ear. “Yourfamily’s hilarious, I love it.”

She basked in the casual touch of skin against skin anddecided that – if this was the reward – she would happily deal with a thousandmeddling families. “You guys are lucky my girlfriend likes you, else you’d all bedead to me!”

Didn’t have to let them have the satisfaction of knowingthat though.

---

[nacey-drews]

38. “Everyone keeps telling me you’re the bad guy.” for the prompts?! if you're taking them. 💓

Hi nonnie! So sorry this took so long to fill, I am a mess. Also, I know this is supposed to be a drabble. I know. I’m just really bad at keeping things at appropriate lenghts. 

Side note, this was inspired by this adorable bts pic we got today of Lili and Cole holding the babies. I couldn’t resist myself. 

38. “Everyone keeps telling me you’re thebad guy.”

//

When the bell rings signaling the end ofthe school day on Monday, Dr. Beaker asks them to stick around for a minute – acollective groan filling the room as they all stop their movements and leanback against their chairs.

“Dueto our recent increase in numbers,” he says, eyes darting quickly to the huddleof black jackets that now decorates the back of the lab. “I’m going tore-assign partners for the final project so that things are more – evened out, between our residentstudents and our newcomers. We want them to feel welcome and supported.”

There’s a loud snort from behind, followed bymuffled complaints from all over the room. Betty doesn’t think much of it; infact, she feels a slight pang of relief at the prospect of not having to endureGinger’s clear lack of interest in their final grade anymore. Dr. Beaker powersthrough the growing tension, listing names and ignoring frustrated sighs andmoans. Betty takes out a small notepad and her favorite gel pen from herbackpack and is halfway through drawing a big smiley face right next to hernumber and email address for her new partner when her name is called from thefront, followed by an uneasy pause.

Whenthe name that follows hers makes the entire class snap their eyes in herdirection, she thinks miserably, well,maybe Ginger wasn’t so bad after all, as she swivels her body slightly tothe side so she can take a look at her new partner.

continue reading in Ao3 or under the cut.

Jughead Jones doesn’t seem fazed by this atall. He simply lifts his eyes from where they had previously been fixed on hisboots, connects them quickly to Betty’s and gives a disinterested half-shrug ofhis shoulder in acknowledgment before one of the guys who always seems to flankhis side says something that makes him avert his gaze.

In turn, Betty turns back to face the frontof the class, a frown beginning to form on her lips. Thoughts of staying behindto ask Dr. Beaker if there’s any chance she could be paired up with someone elsebegin to swim around in her head as he finishes off listing names.

She can’t possibly work with Jughead Jones,leader of the Southside Serpents; if what her classmates have been saying aboutthe gang and their leader ever since they were forced to transfer to RiverdaleHigh is anything to go by, she suspects it’s better if she keeps a respectabledistance from him. “You don’t know him atall,” a small voice nags at her from the back of her mind, effectivelycutting off her train of thought; a tiny speck of guilt flooding her at thepossibility that she’s being unfairly biased towards her new classmate. He’s a Serpent, she reminds herself.

It’s all for nothing, though, because thewords that leave Dr. Beaker’s mouth next crumple all her plans to shreds. “Thesechanges are non-negotiable, so I suggest you talk to your new partners soon soyou can get to working on the final project.”

Defeated, she walks out of class withslumped shoulders and her bottom lip trapped between her front teeth, mind chanting it’s only Monday it’s only Mondayit’s only Monday as she parts herway through the throngs of students littering the hallway as she tries to makeit to her locker.

“Hey, B,” she hears from behind her as she’sdumping her History textbook into her backpack.

Sheturns around to find Veronica inspecting her nails carefully, not lifting hereyes off her perfect manicure as she continues to speak. “Can you believeCheryl got accepted into the overseas program? I swear she paid her way into –wait, what’s wrong?”

Veronica’s eyes had caught Betty’s expressionmid- rant, her perfect eyebrows knitting close together. Betty grimaces,closing her locker behind her and opening her mouth to explain. Suddenly, Veronica’sposture stiffens, brown eyes narrowed in accusation. A group of Serpents stepsloudly out of Dr. Beaker’s room, effectively drawing everyone’s attention to thesnakes in their back with a huff of indignation.  Betty tries to get a closer look and triesnot to dwell on the fact that she’s looking for a particular crown shapedbeanie in the middle of the ruckus.

“I swear I can’t believe we’re forced toshare our building with those –“Veronica starts, her mouth contorting into thestart of an insult.

Betty cuts her off before she can finishwhatever derogatory term she was going to spout. “I got paired up with JugheadJones for the final project in Chem.”

“What?B, no way in hell! You need to tell –,“Veronica protests, brown eyes widening almost comically and eyebrows risinghigher up her forehead.

“He said it’s not up for discussion, so I’mstuck,” Betty interrupts again, sighing as they make their way down the halland into the parking lot once the path is cleared out by Mr. Weatherbee and hiswarning voice.

“Ugh, that sucks,” Veronica complains,waving at Smithers’ waiting form leaning against the door to the Lodge’s sleekblack car. “What are you going to do?”

“I need to talk to him about our project –Ginger hadn’t done her part yet anyway and mine’s halfway done, so I just needhim to take over and that’s it, no need to make a big deal of it I guess,”Betty explains breathily as she rummages for her car keys in her backpack.

“But –,” Veronica starts again, only tosigh and roll her eyes at Betty’s expression of finality. “Fine, I’ll take yourword for it.”

.

.

By Thursday, Betty hasn’t approachedJughead to discuss their project, always losing her courage whenever shecatches him sauntering down the corridor, smirking or lost in conversation withhis fellow Serpents. The fact that all her friends have expressed similarsentiments to Veronica’s on Monday has only hindered her efforts further,making her shrink into her seat whenever the words “Serpent” and “Betty” filterinto their conversations during lunch.

She’s walking back from the bathroom during4th period when she sees him, hands deep into his locker with afrown on his face. He tugs hard on something, making notebooks and loose piecesof paper drop down to the floor. He curses into the empty hall as he crouchesdown to pick up his belongings, more curses leaving his mouth as some of thepapers fly further down the corridor.

She bends down to pick a rustling piece ofpaper that brushes up next to her foot, walking with her knees slightly bentand her arms outstretched in order to catch stray papers as she closes thedistance between them.

“Here,”she says once she’s next to him, straightening up and shaking the pile ofpapers in her hand before handing it to him.

“Thanks,” he replies with a slight twitch ofhis lips that Betty interprets as the beginning of a smile.  She doesn’t get to see if she’s right becausehe quickly turns sideways and shoves the stack of papers into the locker.

“Noproblem,” she says automatically once he turns back to her, a small raise ofhis eyebrows indicating he’s surprised she’s still there. “Everything okay inthere?”

“Yeah just—someone stuck gum in the back,and my textbook got all –, “Jughead sighs, disgust on his face as he stares atthe book in his hands.

Betty grimaces, feeling a pang of pity inher chest. “Oh, that’s really… mean,” she finishes off lamely, wonders brieflyif her friends had been behind it.

He snorts sardonically but nods anyway.Betty fidgets and shifts her weight from one foot to another when he doesn’t addanything else.

“Oh! I’m Betty,” she cries out, cringing atthe chirpiness of her voice. “I almost forgot—we’re partners in Chem.”

“I’m aware,” he drawls out, eyes glintingwith amusement. “And I’m Jughead, but you already know that.”

“Um,y-yeah anyway, I was just wondering when you had time to meet up so we can workon it,” she clarifies after a long pause, embarrassment clear in her face.

“Uh, I’m free most days. Except today, “Jugheadadds hastily, scratching the back of his neck. “I have this – thing.”

“Okay well, are you free tomorrow?” sheasks, surprising herself. The project isn’t due in for a couple more weeks, butshe doesn’t want to make it more awkward by taking it back now that sherealizes there’s no real hurry to get it done.

He seems taken aback by her suggestion fora second, but nods nonetheless. “Sure. Where do you want to meet up?”

“Pop’s?”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Cooper,”he says, smirking. “I wouldn’t want to get you in trouble with your Northsidefriends.”

She rolls her eyes and is ready to come upwith a smart retort that includes the words Idon’t care but, well, she’s not entirely sure that’s true, so she gives hima sheepish grin and says, instead. “Fine, what about my place?”

She’s surprised by her own brazenness onceagain, color rising to her cheeks as she opens and closes her mouth to take itback.

“Alright,” Jughead says before she can formher words, shrugging nonchalantly.

Giving him a tight- lipped smile andignoring the nervous flutters in her stomach, she reaches into the back pocketof her jeans and hands him the note she’s had all week on her, ignoring the amusedsmirk he sends her way. She also ignores her teacher’s questioning eyes whenshe makes it into the classroom, cheeks ablaze.

(She doesn’t tell anyone about it.)

.

.

.

“So, where do you want to work?” she askshim now, after exchanging quick hellos by her front door. Betty tries not tolet her mind linger on the fact that he’s not wearing his leather jacket today,a snug dark grey sweater clings to his arms instead. She fails, hard, and triesto distract herself by arranging the cushions in the living room as he givesthe room a quick once-over.

“Nice place,” he responds instead, eyeslingering on a family picture by the chimney.

“Thanks,” she chirps out before a frownsettles on her face. “It’s all my parents though, so thanking you is kind of –weird, now that I think about it. I didn’t do anything.”

He doesn’t say anything back, just regardsher with amusement as he plops his messenger bag on the floor, making her jumpslightly.

“The floor’s dirty,” she says after a beat,inching closer to grasp the strap of his bag and placing it on a chair. Hiseyes follow her, and she swears she hears him mutter a low, “I doubt that.”

.

.

.

She’s starting to think that maybe this isn’tso bad after the third or fourth time that Jughead makes her giggle imitatingDr. Beaker and Mr. Weatherbee.

Coincidentally, it’s when the wailing alsostarts.

Startled,Jughead almost drops the slice of pizza he had been munching on smugly at Betty’slast outburst of laughter.

“Is that –“he says after swallowing hard,his eyebrows scrunched up together in confusion.

“My niece and nephew,” she explains, smilefalling as she pushes her chair back and stands up. “My sister’s out with myparents tonight at some musical show, so I’m on baby duty.”

He nods slowly, taking a bite out of hispizza before dropping in on the plate and standing up. She immediately thinkshe’s going to leave, an uneasy feeling forming at the pit of her stomach. She hadn’thad this much fun in weeks, and she’d found his sense of humor refreshing and endearing– she also highly suspects that come Monday they’ll be back to being strangersin the hallway.

“I’m sorry,” she mumbles, playing with thehem of her pink sweater. “I didn’t think they’d wake up.”

He looks confused for a second before heshrugs. “Betty, it’s fine – do they need feeding?”

She blinks, registering both that he doesn’tlook like he’s leaving and that it’s the first time he’s ever called her by hername.

“Uh… yes, probably.”

“Okay,” he says simply, gesturing with hishand in the direction of the stairs.

“Okay”, she repeats belatedly to herself asshe moves into the kitchen first to grab the bottles from the counter. He’s a Serpent.

She finds him waiting at the bottom of thestairs, hands deep inside his pockets. He doesn’t say anything, so Betty startsto walk up the steps and he follows after her. He’s a Serpent. She’s unsure of what’s going on exactly, but surprisinglyshe doesn’t feel uncomfortable with Jughead so she finds herself notquestioning it, even if well – he isa Serpent.

She stands in the doorway to Polly’schildhood room, her bed pushed slightly to the side to accommodate the twins’cribs – the sight continues to surprise her every time. Jughead’s chest thumpsagainst her back softly when he makes it to the top of the stairs, snappingBetty out of her thoughts.

“Sorry,” she says, “I was just trying tofigure out which one of them needs it the most.”

He chuckles, reaching for one of thebottles in her hands. “Here, I can help.”

She watches in astonishment as he walks toJuniper’s crib and lifts her easily in his arms, lightly rubbing her back asthe little girl stares up at him in wonder, her crying subsiding into tiny hiccups.

He coos and smiles down at the chubby baby,tilting her enough for him to slip the bottle’s nipple into her mouth.

He turns around then, catching Bettystaring at him with an open mouth by Dagwood’s crib.

“What?”Jughead asks defensively, a hint of color to his cheeks.  “I have a little sister; this is nothing new tome.”

“No! I just—everyone keeps telling meyou’re the bad guy,” she explains, reaching down to pick the small baby in herarms. When she returns to her normal height, she finds him looking at her witha hard expression on his face, the previous softness in his eyes replaced byweariness. She rushes to add hastily. “But –“

“But…?”

“I – I don’t know, I guess I’m starting torealize that they were wrong,” she admits, fiddling with the bottle in herhands.  “From what I’ve seen so far, youseem like a pretty great guy. I mean, you’re really funny, and you um –,” you’re really cute, she wants to say, “-you’rereally good with babies,” is what she says instead.  

Her admission is met with silence, and shestarts to feel like maybe she said too much. Embarrassment creeps up her spine,her cheeks becoming uncomfortably warm. She sneaks a glance at him from underher lashes.

He’s smiling at the ground.

 //

[milleniumhan]

Anywhere is better than here. (Billy Hargrove x Reader)

*Trigger Warning: Domestic Abuse. *

Note: Hey guys! I wanted to say a few things before you keep on reading. This fic contains a part in which there is domestic abuse. It is part of Billy’s character traits and the story called for it. I don’t want you to think I am trying to romanticze abuse, that is in NO WAY my intention. Okay, on to the story! I really hope you like it, if you do please let me know, and as always feedback + reblogs are very appreciated! Enjoy! <3 <3 <3 

This was requested by a nonny!: “Do you write billy imagines? because i was wondering if you could write an imagine for y/n meeting billy’s “parents” and his father yelling at y/n.” I changed it a little bit, I hope you don’t mind! <3 

Summary: Neil is not fond of you, but he won’t be around when you have dinner at Billy’s, right? 

Warnings: Domestic abuse, angst and swearing.

Tag list babes! <3 : @ambeazyyy @ditchthesticks @lilo-1398 @missnena2194 @javapeach @justrunawayoftheshit @steveharringtonofficial @theroyalbrownbarbie @tobarblog @tricklingstreamdacre If I forgot anyone please throw sticks at me and make me remember! Please message me if you would like to be added to my permanent tag list! 

MILLENIUMHAN’S MASTERLIST.

P.S: It has a happy ending, kind of. 

“You-uh, you want to have dinner at my house…or whatever?” Billy tried to fake disinterest on your answer, but he really wanted you to say yes. His proposal left you completely confused, not really knowing what to answer. You looked back at Billy who was leaning against your locker like he always did, his eyes searching for an answer through your expression.

“Um…” you started “What about your father? Surely Neil Hargrove doesn’t want me in his house.” Billy swallowed thickly at the question, he had never told you about the abuse inflicted by his father, but he had told you how Neil didn’t let him bring girls to his house. He took your hands tightly in one of his and tilted your chin with the other.

“Hey” he said softly as your eyes locked onto his. “Fuck him, okay? He won’t be there. Susan is the only one who is going to be there, she decided to stay here while my father goes out of town.” You furrowed your eyebrows and pulled back from him slightly.

“Susan?”

“Yeah, as much as I despise her, Max has been gushing about you with her and she thought this was the most appropriate time to have you over.” You couldn’t help but smile widely at the thought.

“I told her you weren’t that great, but she insisted.” Billy started mocking you when he noticed your grin, his own face beaming. You hit his shoulder playfully with your notebook before finally agreeing to go. “Should I pick you up later or should we just go straight to my place after school?” You were about to answer when you heard footsteps racing towards you. Before you could turn around to see where they were coming from, Max collided into your back, giving you the biggest hug.

“Are you coming today?” She inquired with hopeful eyes. She dangled from your side, still holding you, as you started to caress her hair. You and Max had a really strong bond, she saw you as a big sister and felt safe around you. She would always tell you how much Billy had changed since you had started to go out with him, even if you didn’t think that was the case. You nodded in response to her previous question. “Great! Then you can help me with my science project.”

“Well that’s presumptuous of you” you replied, mimicking her famous line. She rolled her eyes at you in usual Max fashion before letting out a chuckle.

“Yes, yes it is, but you’re still going to help me.”

“So, I guess we’re all leaving together after school then.” Billy said as he started to walk away, with the excuse that the cheesiness between you and his step-sister was too much for him, but he secretly loved it.

-

After school you met both of them at the parking lot. Max wasn’t late for the first time. You got into the car and immediately put on some of your favourite songs on the radio, gaining a sigh from Billy and a joyful exclamation from Max. You started singing along loudly as Max accompanied you in the chorus, Billy looking at you every now and then, shaking his head to try and conceal the smile so present in his face. He wanted to cherish this moment forever.

Billy pulled up to the driveway of the house. Your stare lingered on the white façade as you wondered if this had been a mistake, something just wasn’t right, you could feel it in the pit of your stomach. Max nudged your seat, signaling you to get out. You shook your head to yourself “I’m just being stupid” you thought as you unbuckled your seatbelt and stepped out of the Camaro. Susan pepped out the window to see if it was you before stepping out onto the porch. She greeted you with a smile and open arms, your gaze clinging onto the gnarly bruise she had in one of her arms as you walked towards her. You felt your heart sink when the realization of how she had gotten it hit you.

“I’ll let you all know when dinner is ready” Susan said with a smile after you had gone inside, Max already leading the way to her room with her skateboard still in hand. Billy brushed right past Susan, he really didn’t like her, he was still hurt about his mother. You, on the other hand liked her, almost pitied her, knowing she probably went through hell with Neil, he wasn’t exactly a nice person. You set down your things on Max’s room as she hung up her denim jacket.

“Okay then, let’s see that project of yours.” You said determined as you sat on the edge of her bed.

“Oh, about that” she started with an audacious expression “There was never a science project. I just wanted you to come over sooner.” You let out a chuckle at the adorable confession and stuck out your tongue at her in a teasing manner, Max didn’t hesitate to do the same. As you were both mocking around and pulling faces to make each other laugh, Billy appeared suddenly. He leaned against the doorway and gave you a look that made Max roll her eyes.

“I’m going to take a nap” he said before simply leaving the room, making you confused “You coming or what?” he shouted at you from the hallway. You shook your head and headed out the room to follow behind him. By the time you got to his room he was already lying on the bed with sweatpants, but shirtless, of course. “Finally” he groaned at you with his signature grin all over his face. You gave him a cheeky look before leaping into bed on top of him. “Ohhmy-aagh” he breathed out as your body pressed the air out of him. You readjusted yourself next to him as you both chuckled, your head directly on his chest as one of your hands traced over it. You stayed there in silence, watching how it moved up and down with every breath he took, his heart beating rapidly against your ear. After a little while he readjusted himself so he was laying on his side, his hands on your waist. Softly, he started to trace the outline of your figure. His rough fingers complimenting your soft skin, the coldness of them making you shiver. He slowly made his way up to your jawline, his eyes following every move he made. He brushed over your bottom lip with his fingertips with such a gentle and light pulse you weren’t even sure he had touched them. He looked up at you, admiring the way your eyes glistened against the light. His hand slowly started to move towards the side of your face, taking its time to get there. He took one of your stray hairs and placed it behind your ear before starting to caress the rest of your hair, it felt like velvet to him. Taking a deep breath, he closed his eyes and pressed his forehead against yours.

“I love you.”  Billy’s words broke the silence in the room.

“I love you too, Billy.”

-

The smell of Susan’s famous pot pie infused the house in it’s entirety, waking both Billy and you up. You went down to the dinning room and sat down, both of you still trying to rub the sleep off of your eyes. Max and Susan chuckled at the sight before handing you your plates. You all started to eat, Susan asking about your day and Max talking about the new friends she had made at school. Billy was even laughing along with all of you. It was so different from usual, the air felt light and cheerful, everyone was…happy. Just as you were having your last bite of dessert, smearing Billy’s face with whipped cream for laughs, you heard the sound of a car arriving. Everyone completely froze, fixing their posture immediately, Billy tensing more than anyone. Susan peeked out of the window again, Neil’s car. She quickly grabbed the plates from the table, the panic spreading through the room. The sound of the car door closing, keys dangling, the loud, firm steps coming towards you, it was definitely Neil.

Enter the Devil.

The footsteps stopped and Max snapped her head towards you, her jaw clenched so tightly you could see the blood creeping to her face like paint on water. The room was so silent that you swore you could hear everyone’s hearts beating rapidly. Susan gave you a glare from the kitchen, you could tell by her face she was gathering the courage to call his name.

“Neil?” her tone soft, almost broken, trying not to show her fear. Neil ignored her voice, his eyes never leaving you.

“What the fuck is she doing here?” the words burned like fire, his rage becoming more and more visible. You felt Billy grab your hand tighter than ever before, his nostrils flared as he tried very hard to regulate his breathing. Neil looked over at Billy and then at Susan, waiting for a response.

“I’m-I’m going to go-” you managed to stutter out as you slowly started to get up from your seat with trembling legs, trying to avoid any further confrontation.

“No you are not!” Neil’s called out, the force in his voice making you sit back down instantly. The room felt tight, like all of the oxygen had been drained out and nobody could breathe anymore. “You cooked for this whore?” Neil continued to spit out as he noticed the plates resting on the sink. “Is this why you didn’t go with me? So you could stay and cook for this bastard and his bitch?”

“Neil, don’t call her tha-” Susan started to no amend. Neil’s face was red with anger now, his eyes darting over at you again like fast bullets.

“Get her out of my fucking house” he yelled at Billy, his tone making all of your insides tremble. Billy didn’t move, he was completely frozen. You tugged at his hand desperately, knowing what would happen if he didn’t respond. “Didn’t you fucking hear me?” Neil said once again, even though his voice was lower it was somehow more frightening. Before Billy could do so much as breathe, Neil grabbed him by the collar and pushed him to the wall, the brisk movement making you tumble as Billy’s hand was torn from yours. “I told you to respect me, I told you to respect this house, and what do you do? YOU BRING SOME BITCH TO EAT MY FOOD ON MY TABLE.”

“She’s not a bitch” Billy said through gritted teeth

“What was that?” Neil said trying to provoke Billy.

“I said, she’s not a BITCH OR A WHORE.” You looked down at the floor and shut your eyes tightly, knowing what those words defending your honor would cost him.

“Are you talking back at me? Be smart about this son.” Neil’s grip tightened even more, Billy’s face turning red as he started grasping for air.

“NEIL! YOU ARE KILLING HIM. ” Susan shouted desperately, not knowing how to stop him.

“Take Maxine to her room, RIGHT NOW!” He snapped his face towards Susan, giving her a menacing look. She quickly grabbed Max and took her to safety, if you could even call it that. You closed your hand into a fist trying to muster some courage, your grip so tight your knuckles started turning white. You knew how stupid it was to intervene, but you also knew how this would end if you didn’t.

“Get your hands off him” you shouted in a stern voice even though your lips where trembling. Neil clenched his jaw tightly before slowly turning his head towards you. “Get your fucking hands off of him” you repeated. Billy looked over at you tears of frustration drowning his face “Stop” Billy tried to say to you, but he couldn’t.

“How dare you talk to me like that? Who the fuck do you think you are?” Neil suddenly took a step towards you, startling you, but you still stood your ground.

“How dare you? How fucking dare you treat your OWN son like this? You are a disgusting piece of shit” You could feel the tears forming in your eyes as the words you had kept inside all of this time poured out. Neil let go of Billy, shifting his focus on you. Billy collapsed to the floor and started coughing for air as he tried to get up on one of his hands, desperate to help you. You quickly ran towards him but you were stopped by Neil. He took your arm tightly in his hand.

“I will not be disrespected by some low-life like you” his sharp eyes freezing you to the core. You were ready to let out a scream when you heard a familiar voice coming from behind.

“Step away from the girl” You looked behind Neil to find the one and only Chief Hopper, pointing a gun at him. “I said, step away from the girl, asshole.” Neil let go of your arm with an unreadable expression. As soon as you were out of his grasp you ran over to Billy, helping him regain his posture. He placed his arm over your shoulders as he tried to stand up “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry” He placed his face on the crook of your neck as he started to cry. It was a weird feeling for you, Billy had never cried in front of you.

After Neil was in cuffs, you ran towards Hopper. He hugged you tightly before pulling back to look at you.

“Look kid, I know your intentions were good, but it was a stupid thing to do. Don’t try that again, okay?”  You looked up at him

“How did you know?”

“We received an anonymous tip” You furrowed your eyebrows at him as he signaled to the entrance of the house. You turned to look at what he meant. Max. You looked at her and gave her a small sad smile as you started to walk towards her.

“Are you okay?” She said softly. You didn’t answer, just pulled her into a hug as she started sobbing into your coat. You let go of her and crouched down to meet her at eye level.

“I’m okay, we are all okay. Thank you.” You whispered at her as you wiped the tears off her eyes before hugging her once more.

You sat on the porch as you waited patiently for Billy, who was currently being interrogated by the detectives along side his family. When they were finally done he came over and sat next to you. After looking at you for a second, he started

“So much for dinner, huh?” he tried to create some comic relief.

“Yeah, what a night.” You tried to smile back. “Why didn’t you tell me?” 

“I don’t know. I just, I didn’t want to seem weak, I guess.” He admitted with guilt and sadness creeping into his eyes. All you could do was hug him tightly

 “I love you, you are not weak.” you whispered into the hug

“I love you too” he whispered back.

“What’s going to happen?” you said as you took his hand in yours.

“Well, he’s probably going to spend the night in jail but after that it’s our choice, it comes down to our decision to press charges or not.”

“Are you going to?” You weren’t sure if you should ask but you couldn’t help yourself, you hated Neil so much, you wanted to know his fate.

“I don’t know…what am I supposed to do? I don’t even want to think about it. I don’t even want to back inside the house.” Billy’s voice sounded tired and sad, his tone so fragile it could break. “Come with me?” He suddenly said as he looked back at you.

“Where to?” you replied back at him with confusion.

“Well, I’ve got a fast car and we’ve got the whole night. Let’s just go.” he softly said as he looked into your eyes, his hands grasping yours tighter with every word.

“Where?” you said as you placed your forehead against his.

“Anywhere is better than here.”

[eternalsterek-broughttolife]

Can I request an animal shelter fic featuring Sterek? I just want to see Sterek being adorable in animal shelter?

I cheated, sorry. This is half for the nonnie above, half to fill a ko-fi commission from a sweet soul I am unable to track down. Rowan, this is for you! Also...I’m obsessed with sphinx cats and would soooo have one already if I weren’t living on campus haha.

I’m also realizing I do NOT know how to finish things. So, sorry for the abrupt ending.

“Stiles,” Derek attempts to level Stiles with a warning glare, but is unsuccessful as he is too preoccupied with the creature in his hands. “No.”

“Stiles, yes,” Stiles says more to himself, a grin spreading across his face that makes him look half mad.

He lifts the cat up to be level with Derek’s face. He looks absolutely crazed, and Derek is about 90 percent sure Stiles chose this cat based on the fact that Derek would say no. And how could Derek not say no. The cat was...hairless. It looked like someone forgot to hang it out after a wash. There was no way Derek was taking it home.

Said cat reached her paw out to lightly pat at Derek’s filling out beard, staring him straight in the eye as if she were daring Derek to take her home. Another glance at Stiles showed he had a similar expression on his face, and Derek sighed. Goddamn it.

“Yay!” Stiles cheers, Derek not having to say a word. He just hands over his card and signs the paperwork, Stiles alternating between cooing at the cat and riffling through the collars next to the front desk.

Which is how Derek finds himself the proud owner of a sphynx cat in a diamond collar. Or something like that.

**

“We have to give her a name,” Stiles calls across the loft from his spot on Derek’s couch where he’s been hanging off the edge, upside-down, playing with one of those string cat toys since they got back from the pound. The cat in question is across the room, slowly getting accustomed to her new home.

“What’s this ‘we’?” Derek says as he finishes drying the last of the dishes and puts the plate away in the cabinet. He wanders over to the couch, leaning against the armrest and watching as the cat starts up the stairs. God, he hopes she’s potty trained.

Stiles sit upright, taking a moment to adjust to the sudden movement. “Derek, she…” He blinks a few times and Derek wonders for a moment if he’s going to throw up. “She’s your cat, dude. You should be the one to name her.”

“You chose her,” Derek rebuts, already knowing he’s going to lose this argument and should just go along with whatever Stiles wants.

That’s how they got here, isn’t it? Stiles was headed back to college in three weeks and claimed Derek would be too lonely without his presence. Not that that had mattered last year, when they had started dating and Stiles had gone off for his first year at university. Yet, somehow, this year was different. And Derek needed someone around when Stiles wasn’t there, hence the cat.

“Fine,” Stiles says, staring him down. “If you want me to name her, I will.”

Derek doesn’t like the look in his eyes and is about to cave when Stiles starts calling out, “Susan! Susan!”

“Stiles, I swear to god,” Derek groans, rubbing his eyes.

“Jessica!”“I get it.”

“Barbara!”

Stiles does get a chance to come up with another ridiculous name as the next second, he’s being tackled into the couch, Derek zeroing on his most ticklish spots. Still, he tries to gasp out a few more suggestions before Derek effectively shuts him up with his mouth.

**

Derek is lying on the couch the next day, a rerun of The X Files playing on low volume on the TV, already half asleep when the cat hops up on his stomach and starts kneading him.

“That’s…weird,” Derek says more to himself than to the cat. He doesn’t move her, though. It’s kind of...nice, if he’s being honest.

She stretches out on his chest, her claws dangerously close to his throat though they don’t come in contact with his skin at all. Eventually she settles just under his chin, rubbing herself against his beard and her purrs vibrating against his throat.

“I guess you’re staying, huh,” Derek mumbles, receiving a twirp in return which forces a smile to his face. “I guess I can’t keep calling you ‘Cat’, then.”

He runs his hands over the smooth, wrinkly skin, not as appalled as he imagined he’d be.

“You don’t really look a Susan though, huh?”

The purring is definitely doing things to Derek’s brain as he has to fight to keep his eyes open. He’ll think of something later. Maybe.

**

“I knew you guys would get along,” a voice says from somewhere above Derek’s head.

Derek just moans and turns to snuggle deeper into the couch which in turn upsets the cat he’d forgotten about. She makes a chastising meow before jumping off of him and finding a sunspot closer to the window.

Stiles quickly replaces her, climbing over the back of the couch to lay on top of Derek and run his nose along Derek’s jaw. Derek pulls him in close and lets out his own form of purring, still half asleep.

“Did you choose a name for her yet?” Stiles asks, lifting his head just enough to catch Derek’s eye.

“Mmmm.”

Stiles grins, something between lovestruck and exasperation crossing his face. “I’m going to keep giving you suggestions until you do,” he warns.

Derek nips at his shoulder in retaliation. “Fine.”

Stiles waits for all of five seconds, a record for him, before he starts poking Derek in the chest. “Well, come on then.”

He can see the moment a name crosses Derek’s mind as his face goes soft and a light blush covers his cheeks, his eyes drifting down. Stiles smiles fondly at him.

“What is it?” he asks, curling himself up in the space under Derek’s chin once more. “I know you’ve found it.”

It takes Derek a few moments, but finally he breathes out, “Talia.”

Stiles grins against his throat before pressing a kiss there. “It’s perfect,” he whispers back, afraid to break the moment.

Buy me a ko-fi

[misssophiachase]

not sure if you are taking prompts, but if you are...klaus doesn't back down from a challenge. it was how caroline ended up lying naked on the kitchen table, not able to do anything about the bowl of her homemade caramel that he's just dumped all over her naked body. if you're not taking prompts or this isn't one you want to do, that's totally fine.

Thanks nonnie, sorry for the delay in writing this. Hope you like my take, it’s set in the post TVD finale world where I am happily living since our endgame. Also I’m tagging you Angie luv @thetourguidebarbie, my smut enabler! NSFW.

Pour Some Sugar on Me

New Orleans - 33 months post TVD finale…

According to the Original siblings, Klaus and Caroline were insufferable nymphomaniacs. Given their sensitive hearing and those thin walls, according to Elijah, they’d left the compound for the weekend to escape the ‘noise pollution’ as Rebekah put it. Kol had tersely told them not to enjoy themselves as they left bags in hand, Klaus had retorted that he was just jealous. The resounding groan he heard from all his siblings only proving his point.

“I can’t believe it actually worked,” Caroline grinned triumphantly, looping her arms around his neck and playing with a stray curl at the nape. “We have the compound to ourselves for forty-eight whole hours.”

“What worked?”

“Oh come on you don’t think I was extra vocal by accident, do you?”

“I just assumed you were enjoying yourself, love,” Klaus replied, his slightly hurt expression not lost on Caroline. “You better not have been faking those orgasms given all the effort I put into pleasuring you.”

“Oh I was enjoying myself plenty, Klaus,” she purred, leaning in and placing a lingering kiss on his crimson lips, her tongue darting into his warmth briefly. She pulled back just as Klaus moaned into her mouth desperate for her to continue. “There’s no need to worry, you’re doing just fine in that department.”

“I wasn’t worried,” Klaus scoffed, although his tone was telling her something different. “I know what an amazing lover I am.”

“Well, to be fair you’ve had over one thousand years of experience,” she teased. “Do you realise we’ve had the place to ourselves for five minutes and we’re still talking?”

“Not that I’m complaining at all but has anyone ever told you just how insatiable you are?”

“I’m trying to make up for lost time, you know given however long it takes and all.”

“Hey, that was all you, love. You could have been in my bed, writhing beneath me for a lot longer if not for that stubborn Forbes determination.”

“I am not stubborn,” she pouted.

“Now that there is case in point” he joked. “It’s okay Caroline, in fact your obstinance is one of the many things I love about you. Your outstanding skills in the bedroom is one of the others.”

Caroline had shown up in New Orleans a month earlier. They’d had minimal contact since Hope started at Caroline’s magic school a year ago but she’d arrived to personally return his cheque. Klaus knew it hadn’t been cashed yet but wasn’t expecting her or it to arrive so unexpectedly on his doorstep. Their banter and simmering sexual tension had returned with full force as they bickered back and forth over possession of said cheque. The Mikaelsons, who were standing transfixed on the surrounding balconies, had all commented that it was the best show they’d seen in a while. Well, that was until it got extremely heated and not at all G rated.

“Stop being a baby Mikaelson and just take it,” she’d growled, shoving it at him for the tenth time.

“Oh, I’m being the immature one here?”

“I can’t accept this, the least you can do is let me return it to its rightful owner.”

“I don’t see my name on it,” he baulked. “You know it’s called a gift for a reason, Caroline.”

“It’s too much for me.”

“Caroline, you’re entirely missing the point here,” he lectured.

“Oh really, and what is that?” She scowled, hands on hips as she waited for his response.

“This isn’t for you, it’s for your school and your students, Hope and the twins included. Don’t you think they deserve to have this so they can enhance their learning experience?”

“Oh, so now you’re going to try and guilt me into accepting this money?”

“Why? Is it working?” He quipped, continuing before she could interrupt. “Think of the children, love.”

“I forgot just how infuriating you can be,” she huffed.

“Trust me, you’re no picnic yourself, sweetheart.” She paused, obviously trying to work out what she was going to say next but there was something else building between them, something very familiar. That tension that had the ability to take hold and override anything in its path.

“How about we revisit this later?” Caroline rasped. Klaus couldn’t remember who made the first move, all he could recall was their lips hungrily attacking each other, shedding their clothes hurriedly and their sweat coated limbs entangled beneath the sheets. They hadn’t left his bedroom for three days straight, something his siblings wouldn’t let him forget in a hurry given their resulting insomnia.

Needless to say she hadn’t left. After all this time apart, the pent up desire between them wasn’t unexpected. Klaus had tasted her once in those woods and he was desperate to do it again, preferably somewhere more comfortable than against a tree trunk. Rebekah compared their urgent need to fornicate at all times to a pair of sex starved rabbits and she was probably right but Klaus didn’t care. The fact that Hope and the twins were at the magic school with Alaric was another reason they’d taken full advantage of the situation.

The cheque, however, was still a bone of contention. Almost like she could read his mind, Caroline spoke. “How about you do something for me and I might consider cashing that cheque.”

“Are we playing out some Pretty Woman fantasy of yours, love?” Klaus teased, his interest well and truly piqued. “I’m listening…”

“Well, since we have the place to ourselves, I’d like to christen every room, starting with the kitchen.” Klaus decided to consider this challenge a win-win, especially given the impressive size of his compound.

“That can be arranged,” Klaus agreed, spinning her around so that her back was flat against his chest. He attached himself to her neck, nibbling along its creamy length as he walked her towards the kitchen.

“I hope you have an appetite,” she moaned in response.

“I’m pretty sure that’s obvious, we both know that’s not a pole rubbing against your thigh, love.” His burgeoning erection was unstoppable, Caroline always had that glorious effect on him.

“I meant hunger wise.”

“So, did I,” Klaus smirked knowingly, continuing his assault on her neck.

“I want you to lay me out on the table and cover me in some of that homemade caramel. Seems fitting given our location, don’t you think?”

“You know I’m more of a savoury fan,” he mumbled, against her skin.

“You’re really going to question me now?” She baulked, turning around to face him, her skin already flushed from his initial teasing. “I’m offering you the opportunity to get hot and sticky with me, Mikaelson and you want to argue over tastes?”

“On second thought, I might need some sugar to sustain me for our planned activity throughout the house given the number of rooms,” he murmured. Only pulling away briefly to collect the caramel in question from the refrigerator and place it on the table in readiness.

“Now, where were we?” He asked, surprising her by pulling her shirt open, buttons scattering in all directions at the sheer force he’d applied.

“That’s the tenth shirt you’ve ruined.”

“Well, given you spend your time practically naked or wearing one of my henleys, who bloody cares? But if you’re concerned feel free to take it out of that cheque once you cash it,” Klaus smiled appreciatively, admiring his impromptu handiwork. “Now, what exactly is this situation?” He looked towards her chest accusingly.

“They’re called breasts, Klaus,” she explained. “Do I need to give you a talk about the female anatomy?”

“I thought we outlawed underwear?” He indicated, ignoring Caroline’s sarcasm and gesturing towards her lacy, cream bra.

“Well, I think that was more your idea than mine.” Klaus didn’t argue, instead he cupped her denim clad cheeks and lifted her effortlessly onto the table. It didn’t take him long to tear off the rest of her clothing, ripping her bra off one handed and tugging down that short, jean skirt.

“Glad to see you paid some attention to the rules, love,” he observed, licking his lips in anticipation as he realised she was indeed panty-less. His white henley and jeans were off in an instant, his impressive length rubbing teasingly along her smooth, pink lips below.

“Now, how about we get dirty?” She only nodded by way of a response, obviously too turned on to verbalise her thoughts at that exact moment.

Klaus drizzled the caramel slowly over her body, watching as she arched her back in reaction to the cold, syrup like substance. He began with her delectable breasts and taut, rosebud nipples, making circular patterns with the caramel as he went, like he was the artist and she his blank canvas. Klaus had to remember to repeat this later with his assortment of paints when they eventually made it to his studio.

He continued his assault, pouring the caramel down her flat abdomen and ending at her quivering centre for now, Caroline now moving her hips upwardly from the sensations it was causing. Klaus hadn’t even touched her yet and could tell she was already climbing towards orgasm. He bent over taking her right nipple in his mouth hungrily, tasting a sugary hit of the sweet nectar while stimulating her senses with his tongue. Klaus used his thumb and fore finger to tweak the other nipple, her short, sharp whimpers telling him she was close. It had been a a few hours since their last tryst so it was hardly unexpected. Klaus could tell from the lust coursing through his body and the almost unbearable pressure stirring in his cock, that he wouldn’t be far behind.

Klaus continued to suckle on her as he ran his fingers along her smooth torso towards his destination, pausing along the way to make patterns with the caramel on her creamy skin as he did. She took hold of his wrist impatiently, obviously trying to hurry his journey. He stopped his attack on her breast, looking at her curiously.

“Now, now love. There’s plenty of time for that. Plus, I recall you saying you wanted to get hot and sticky.” He could tell by her unimpressed groan and accompanying frustrated look she didn’t quite agree with his assessment. He continued to massage the thick liquid into her skin, looking forward to washing it off in the shower when they made it to the bathroom. At this rate, Klaus wasn’t sure how they were ever going to leave the kitchen in the next two days.

He finally relented, finding her waiting pussy through the sticky, caramel path and slowly rubbing her lips, already slick from her arousal. He dipped his fingers inside, amazed at just how wet she was already as he massaged her silky folds, his speed only building. She was moving in synch with his fingers now, her hips bucking wildly to meet each stroke. Klaus knew she was ready to erupt, pulling his fingers free and replacing them with his throbbing cock. Caroline matching his thrusts as he slid back and forth, her cries only gaining in urgency and decibels as Klaus bent down to kiss her hungrily.

He could feel her tightening around him and Klaus stood again wanting to watch her impending orgasm as it hit. It was a vision he’d never tire of, after all. Caroline cried out, Klaus continuing to pump inside her so as to prolong her pleasure and heighten his. She began to convulse, as the waves of pleasure rippled through her and Klaus couldn’t contain himself any further, coming with full force inside her.

Klaus rode through the delicious dizziness, trying to stay steady on his shaky legs while Caroline moaned beneath him from the residual sensations of her orgasm. Klaus decided they really needed to include food more often in their sex life, even if it was a sticky mess. When he’d finally recovered and pulled out slowly, he looked down at her flushed face and beautiful, toned physique covered in caramel and splayed out across the table.

“Wow. That was…”

“I know,” she grinned wickedly.

“So, about that noise thing?” He asked curiously. “Were you faking it then because from what I could tell that’s probably the loudest you’ve been and we’re all alone.”

“Okay, maybe I was trying to avoid stroking that already inflated ego of yours, but what’s wrong with being a little noisy?”

“You won’t hear any complaints from me, love,” he smiled, bending over to place a chaste kiss on her lips. “Plus if it gets my siblings out of the house more often then I’m definitely on board. So, how about we take a shower, your breasts have my name and some soap written all over them.”

“Not just yet,” she said, sitting upright and placing her hand on his cock and stroking it possessively. Klaus felt a jolt from her unexpected touch, knowing that he was already starting to recover. “There’s a part of you I definitely want to lick some caramel off before we’re done.” Klaus wasn’t going to complain, handing her the jug and just hoping they had enough caramel left to finish the job.

Funnily enough the cheque wasn’t cashed that day or the next, its fate becoming a bargaining chip in the bedroom, or whatever room they chose.

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