#ictoan answers

[artlessictoan]

If it was a modern world, what do you think the sand sibs would do as like a job? I'm writing a sorry and I kinda need ideas :)

*cracks knuckles* i got this

kakuro:

he is textbook theatre nerd so anything in the performing arts would be his jam, though i think he’d be more at home behind the scenes than on stage not that he isn’t a total drama queen maybe as a set designer or in lighting and effects? most artistic roles seem like they’d suit him, but outside of that he’d def do well in engineering type jobs, mechanic, electrician.. anything like that, also there aren’t enough fics where he works in medicine, like c’mon think about his battle-style, he’d be a killer surgeon ………….bad word choice or a medicinal chemist, helping develop new drugs and treatments and stuff, that’d be awesome to see

temari:

for some reason i always lean towards law for her, i kinda like the idea that she’d go into family law bc thanks for nothing dad or maybe become a defence attorney, however i can also very easily see her going into politics, any sort of accounting/data analytics type jobs (basically anything where she can flex her big smarty-pants brain powers), or, in a completely different direction, professional sports. either something combative like boxing or MMA, or athletics bc.. just imagine….. tema with her big beefy arms……….. just launching a shot put into the fucking stratosphere………………

……….look i have a type ok

gaara:

i have a broad range of go-to jobs for him but my faves are gardener, geologist (bc a kid who uses sand to fight and knows what kind of minerals to grind down to make it stronger and where to find it is gonna be way more into rocks than is probably healthy. i’m surprised more people don’t write it tbh), librarian, politics if you wanna play closer to canon, some kind of artist (i particularly like sculpture, but also consider glass-blowing, bc sand again) and i can see him wanting to go into social care or mental health care, bc it’s somewhere he’d be able to make a big difference and he can empathise with those struggling a lot

hope that helped!

[artlessictoan]

Hello do you have headcanons for Butch!Sakura/femme!Ino?

hrmmm let’s see!

they play up the traditional gender roles to a borderline parody level in public, up to and including sakura just straight up carrying ino around bridal style for absolutely no reason and ino very loudly complimenting her girlfriend’s muscles

despite their outward appearances however, ino is 100% the dom in the relationship

sak will spend ages lovingly running her fingers through ino’s hair in the morning while she’s still asleep and it’s gotten all tangled up overnight. ino hasn’t noticed yet and is convinced that she just has perfect hair at all times

they’re generally more relaxed about their respective styles at home, even though ino does not do comfort wear At All (shameless plug for that oneshot i wrote a while back)

sakura takes the spiders outside because if ino even catches a glimpse of one she will relentlessly track it down with murderous intent

they’re always planning each other’s outfits and very occasionally completely swap styles just for a lark (ino rocks the fuck out of a suit and sakura’s legs look killer in heels)

ino is a astrology/witchcraft lesbian and will proclaim the merits of crystal healing with anyone who will listen, much to Science Nerd sakura’s despair. how much ino actually believes in it and how much is just her trying to mess with her gf is up for debate.

flowers are constantly being left all over the house for each other, it has slowly developed into an unspoken competition for who can put them in the most unexpected places. sak is still trying to work out how the hell ino got a rose into the box her new shoes came in before she even got home with them

[artlessictoan]

Hi do you have butch!Sakura headcanons?

oooh yes!

after first cutting her hair she goes through a regular ritual of thinking ‘should i grow my hair out again?’ then getting fed up with dealing with it after two months and hacking it all off again, even shorter. she ends up with a crew cut by the time she’s in her mid 20s and decides to just stick with it after that

keeps it pink tho (or dyes it pink in a real-world setting), bc that can still be a butch colour

basically lives at the gym as a way to meet lots of cute girls her fave things are weightlifting and boxing

owns an egregious number of tank tops, will take any and every opportunity to show off her arms.

has exactly one suit for formal occasions. she had it made just slightly too small so that she can flex it to shreds. y’know. just in case the situation ever arises where that would be necessary.

more of a soft butch in personality though, how dominant she is in a relationship mostly depends on her partner

[artlessictoan]

Hi, I know its not as common, but what are your headcanons for butch!Hinata or futch!Hinata? :D

BUTCH HINA BUTCH HINA BUTCH HINA

90% of her wardrobe is just hoodies, she only owns like.. two pairs of jeans and one pair of very old, very worn out boots (she will keep her clothes until they are literally disintegrating before accepting that she needs to go thrifting) wears sports bras or binders whenever she’s going outside #big boobed butch problems

came to butchness later in life, though it was always the way she’d wanted to express herself. still keeps some of her old high femme clothes around just in case she has to go to a family thing, but donated most of them to hanabi when she came out as a trans girl

seems more soft butch until you get to know her, bc she’s shy and soft-spoken, but once she’s comfortable around you she goes full on confident and assertive and treats every girl around her like a princess

long-haired butch, she likes it either tucked under a hat or just in a messy ponytail

hina is absolutely a top who likes to smother her partners with attention and pleasure. i will take this hc to my grave.

[artlessictoan]

Every time I draw... Shinki... He must have a septum piercing... I don't know why... It just him

like a simple bead ring or something? i can see him going for that! prolly only the one though, yodo would have piercings and tats galore, araya would be a bit too wimpy for either tbh (cutesy glittery temporary tattoos though.....)

[artlessictoan]

Could I request something for Soft butch Karin and Butch Hinata? The pairing stole my heart by accident and now im in love with it.

YESSSSSSSS MORE HINAKARIN also teacher au, bc i’ve been craving it lately

(requests open)

(ao3 mirror)

---

“Are you sure no one’s coming?” He’d been asking thatquestion every five seconds for the last ten minutes and, honestly, Hikari wasgetting sick of it.

She casually elbowed the ladder her friend was balancing on,taking a little joy in the terrified squeal he let out. “Yeah, I’m sure, justhurry up so we can get out of here already.” Beside her, Ren snickered, beforegently shaking the ladder himself.

“Would you both cut it out, I’m the one doing all the work y’know!”

“Ren came up with the plan and I made the stuff to go in theballoons, compared to that you’ve got the easy bit,” she said, peeking her headout of the door and looking both ways down the hall to check for intruders.

They had been waiting for this opportunity for weeks andsoon, the moment would be at hand. Revenge was gonna be sweet.

“Ok, I’m done, let’s get outta here, quick,” Yuta said, jumpingoff the ladder and quickly folding it up.

Together, they gathered up any evidence of their mischief, checkedthe surroundings for anyone lying in wait, then, sharing a knowing smirk andsnickering at each other, they turned around to head back to their classroom. Thebell had already rung, but it was only Nara-sensei’s class, he wouldn’t punishthem for tardiness – hell, he probably hadn’t even turned up himself yet.

“What do you three think you’re doing?”

As one, they froze in place, before slowly, sloooooowly,turning around to face the sharp voice that had silently snuck up on them. “K-Karin-sensei!”

They were screwed.

“Well?” she asked, staring down at them, arms crossed andfoot tapping. A notoriously strict teacher had caught them, carrying a ladder, string,tape and empty water balloons in their hands and generally just looking mightysuspicious. No way was she going to let them out of this easy, not unless theyhad a bulletproof excuse.

“We were just…” She looked to each of her allies in turn, neitherof whom giving her a response more useful than a shrug. “Juuust… going tochange a lightbulb?”

Was she blinking that slowly on purpose, or was time justslowing for Hikari as her life passed in front of her eyes – all six years ofit. “With balloons.”

“Um, these are-” Think of something, quick.

Finally, Ren stopped shivering in terror long enough up tohelp her out, saying, “For a class with Konohamaru-sensei later!” His excusewas even almost believable.

“Really.”

When Ren failed to elaborate, Yuta jumped in to save him. “He’suh… teaching us the rasengan?” Aaaand they were back to being screwed. Ok,maybe she hadn’t been able to come up with anything better, but she was stillgoing to have to drag both her friends off and coach them on knowing when tokeep their big mouths shut when they got out of this. If they got out ofthis.

And judging by the ever-narrowing eyes of the scariestteacher in the entire academy, that was looking less likely by the second.

“You’re in your second year; rasengan is an advanced classonly available to genin graduates.”

If she’d been in a better state of mind, Hikari might’vewondered why she didn’t seem phased by the more obvious issue of why they wouldeven need to bring water balloons to a class teaching an A-rank jutsu, but as itwas, she just trembled in place, praying for an escape from this situation.

“Classes have started, what are you all doing out- oh,Karin-sensei, is something the matter here?”

Lightly jogging down the hall towards them, messy ponytailbouncing along behind her, was their salvation.

All three students shouted in unison, “Hinata-sensei!”

“These three were clearly up to something, I’m just tryingto get to the bottom of it.” Glasses were adjusted as the shorter of the two womencame to a stop beside the other. Seeing them standing next to each other, thedifference was stark; where Karin looked cool and professional, in her buttonup shirt and tailored shorts – the only contrast to her smart appearance being herundercut hair – Hinata was all soft hoodies and a thousand layers, clearly shewas only dressing for comfort, but it made her so much more approachable than almostevery other adult working at the school.

Moral boosted by the soft presence of the kind teacher,Hikari found her voice again. “We haven’t done anything; this is all just a bigcoincidence!”

“I’m not buying that for a second.”

“Karin-sensei, let’s give them the benefit of the doubt,” Hinatasaid, reaching up to rest a light hand against the other woman’s shoulder. “I’msure our students would know better than to lie to us.” The gentle smile on herlips was sharper than any of Karin-sensei’s glares.

Hikari twitched.

“In fact, why don’t we all go into the room together and seewhat happens?”

The three students exchanged a glance. “Uh, actually-” Renstarted speaking, but was cut off before he could get anywhere.

“I mean, if you haven’t done anything, then I’m sure you wouldbe happy to prove it.” She still wore the gentle smile, but, with every word outof her mouth, it seemed less and less kind; more and more cunning. “It would bequite easy.”

By this point, sweat was sliding down Hikari’s back like awaterfall. “Well, see, we would, except that we really have a class tobe getting to now, don’t want to be late, right?”

Hinata blinked at them, smile not dimming for a second. “You’realready late, I’m sure a few extra seconds won’t hurt, I’ll even vouch for youto your teacher.”

A hand settled heavily on her shoulder, firmly pushing hertoward the door. Hikari sent a desperate look to her friends – theirexpressions of pure terror perfectly matched her own – then, hopelessly, as alast-ditch effort, turned to Karin-sensei.

There was no mercy to be found in her glower.

As the teacher pulled open the door, she finally found thecourage to scream, “NO, STOP!”

She closed her eyes, already knowing what was coming,waiting for the inevitable impact-

The rush of wind was halted with such speed that she sworeshe heard a little thunder clap. But, other than that, she felt nothing.

Sucking in a deep breath, she slowly opened one eye,squinting at the green blob hanging an inch from her nose. The relief floodingthrough her left her bones feeling like jelly – not too dissimilar to the gloopysubstance she knew to be held within the water balloon’s thin shell, carefully mixedwith a kind of dye that took a week to wash out – but she managed to staymostly upright as she staggered back a few steps from the hanging balloon.Following the string it was attached to with her gaze, she saw the hand holdingit firmly in place and, following the hand up a dark-skinned arm, she found itattached to a blank-faced Karin-sensei.

“Clear up this mess and get to your classes. Now.”

---

The halls grew quiet, as they slowly walked away from thefrantically apologetic students and she was thankful for it, because shedefinitely didn’t want anyone to hear them talk.

“You were going to let her get hit by that balloon, weren’tyou?”

Hinata glanced at her with those huge, terribly innocenteyes of hers. “If she payed more attention in her classes, she would have beenable to dodge it.”

She snorted, but still had to bite her own lip to keep thesmirk concealed. “I can’t believe I’ve got the reputation as the scary teacher,when you can go around pulling shit like that and still be everyone’s favourite.”

“Are you jealous?” God, that quietly confident air Hinataheld around herself like an aura was just devastating.

Trying to play off her embarrassment – and slight horniness,they were in the workplace after all – Karin said, “As long as they take mylessons seriously, I don’t care if they like me or not.” Which wasn’t true atall; as much of a pain as some of them could be, there was a kind of fulfilmentand excitement that she got from teaching that she’d never had in her entiretime as a shinobi.

She just had a bad case of resting bitch-face and was alittle awkward around kids was all.

And at this point, she didn’t want to ruin her reputation.

Feather-light fingers trailed up her spine, leaving trailsof ticklish skin in their wake, even through her shirt. “Don’t worry, you’ll alwaysbe my favourite.”

Red to her ears, she snapped her head away from hergirlfriend so that she couldn’t see how happy that comment had just made her.Practically feeling the grin pointed at her back, she made a show of looking ather watch and muttering an excuse about having tests to score before her nextclass started and, with a short goodbye and a light peck to her cheek, sheswiftly marched down the hall.

Hinata grabbed her hand before she could get very farhowever, easily pulling her back and gently bringing her down enough that theirlips could meet in a brief kiss. “I’m taking you out somewhere nice tonight; I’llpick you up at eight.”

“So bossy,” she murmured, biting at her lip lightly beforepulling away. With a bashful grin and slightly wobbly legs, she managed to get halfwaydown the hall before soft words halted her in her tracks.

“Wear that suit I like, the one with the purple flowers onit.”

“Fine, but you better not show up wearing a ratty old hoodieagain! You might not have any standards, but I do.”

---

[artlessictoan]

Uhh is it possible for you to do a yodocho thing? Where yodo is kinda butch and chocho is the fem one and yodo is trying to ask her out but they keep getting interupted by like family and friends?

boy howdy is that possible nonny dear! sorry it tookso long to finish this but jfc 5000 words ofc it’s the yodocho one that ends up this long but it was an absolute blast to write so thank you for blessing me with this prompt!

(requests open)

(ao3 mirror)

---

“Maaan, haven’t been here in so long, this place looksexactly the same.”

Yodo rolled her eyes – the thing that never changed was herfriend’s reaction every time she came over to her house – but helped Chouchou bringin the many bags of luggage she’d brought with her. The woman had claimed she’dpacked light for this trip, but Yodo couldn’t imagine how she’d ever manage togo through so many outfits in just a week.

Without bothering to wait for Yodo to shed her extra layers,she bounded up the stairs, already on a bee-line to Yodo’s room.

“Oi, wait up!” She struggled with fabric, finally justthrowing it on the floor for someone else to pick up later. Or for her dad tonag her into doing it herself. Whichever came first.

By the time she caught up to Chouchou, she was almost to herroom, but had stopped at the open door to the Kazekage’s study. With the kindof brazen disrespect that he somehow managed to inspire in a lot of kids andteenagers, she waved at him and practically screamed, “Hey Uncle Gaara, thanksfor having me!”

He nodded and gave a brief smile – the only kind he wasreally capable of, but no one thought less of him for it. “Of course, it’salways a pleasure to see you.”

They passed by his office and got almost three feet beforehe poked his head around the door and called after them, “Do you want me tobring you anything?”

“No thanks papa, we had lunch before we got home.”

Despite her words, he trailed after them, with the kind ofslightly anxious twitchiness he always had whenever a guest came over. “Are yousure?” he asked, respectfully staying in the hallway when they got to Yodo’sroom. “You don’t want anything to drink at least? I can-”

“We’re fine, just call us when dinner’s ready,” shesaid, shutting the door before he could continue pestering them.

Leaning against it until she was happy that he had walkedback to his study, she let out a sigh before turning around. Chouchou hadalready made herself at home, flopping down on Yodo’s bed face-first, her luggagedropped carelessly on the floor.

She elected to leave it there – she didn’t like tidying upher own shit, she wasn’t about to start doing it for someone else’s – andinstead took a flying leap on top of her friend.

Chouchou grunted, but didn’t scream, which was a littledisappointing.

“Ugh, knew something like that was coming, you’re such achild,” she said, twisting her head enough to glance up at the weight attachedto her back.

Yodo snorted, but shifted so that she was just leaningagainst her. “You love it,” she mumbled, seeing if she could rest her headagainst her friend’s back in such a way that she could hear her heartbeat. Shehad to wonder if her closeness would be appreciated if Chouchou knew about thereal depth of her feelings towards her.

It was weird, they’d been best friends since the moment themet, they roughhoused all the time, Chouchou had never been shy about pokingand prodding and tickling whenever Yodo let her guard down and none of that hadever bothered her before – well, except the tickling. That was just cruel – butthen she hit eighteen and realised that holy shit Chouchou was smokin’ hotand she was suddenly beset by feelings that she had not been prepared for inthe slightest. They had turned what would once have been a friendly,comfortable interaction into something at once exhilarating and filled with anunexplainable tension.

The gentle tapping immediately derailed her train ofthought. She leapt to her feet before she could be accused of something.

Gaara’s head appeared around the door, a tray hoveringbeneath it. “Here, I’ve brought you some tea.”

“I said we didn’t need anything!”

If he noticed her suspiciously loud voice, he didn’t mentionit, instead just calmly saying, “Well, I still thought I should make yousomething, just in case,” as the tray floated into the room, supported by a platformof sand.

She groaned, long and loud, until it was carefully set down.“Ok, fine, can you go away now?” Because she was embarrassed enough around Chouchouwithout adding parental interference into the mix.

Her father levelled her with a heavy stare.

“…Thank you for the tea,” she muttered, trying to sound moredefiant than she really felt.

He smiled in that way that always managed to make her feelbetter, no matter how annoying he could sometimes be. “You’re welcome.”

The door clicked shut, leaving the two girls alone oncemore.

Chouchou immediately began snickering, as she grabbed a cup.“Chill, girl, what’re you acting so weird for? I don’t mind Uncle Gaara hangingaround.”

She puffed her cheeks out, before stalking over to the bedand sitting heavily next to her. “He still treats me like a little kid, eventhough I’m legally an adult now!” Maybe if she wasn’t pouting, her words wouldn’thave had her friend snorting unashamedly.

“Well, to be fair, you can be pretty immature,” she eventuallymanaged to say, easily dodging the fist swung at her head, “but, you’ve grownup a lot these past few years, I’m so proud of you.”

“You’re the worst, you know that?”

For a moment, something in Chouchou’s eyes changed, a flashof emotion too fleeting to pin down, leaving Yodo all the more unsteady for it.Before she could question what was wrong though, a sly little smirk spreadacross purple-painted lips. “Is that what you really think?” she asked,voice suddenly low and husky and if she didn’t know better, she might call it seductive– that was certainly the effect it was having on her.

She might’ve been able to make a snappy retort, except Chouchouhad chosen this exact moment to cross her legs, causing her skirt toriiide up, exposing juuust enough gloriously muscled thigh to shut down everyone of her higher functions.

She didn’t even notice the door opening again, until a softvoice directly behind her blew away the fog in her brain.

“Kankuro made some snacks earlier, I forgot to bring them upwith the-”

Her neck cracked at the speed with which she spun around. “DAD!”

“Yes?”

The grin stretching across her face felt like it was goingto tear her face apart, even her dad looked a little uncomfortable at seeingit. “Thank. You. Now please leave us alone.”

He quickly dropped the plate in his hands next to the tea he’dbrought up earlier, then extracted himself from the room. She listened out forhis footsteps to completely disappear, taking the opportunity to catch herbreath and try to calm down her short-circuiting brain, before finally turningback around, to face Chouchou’s perfect legs and devastating smirk.

How had she been so oblivious to Chouchou’s beauty for somany years?

“You know, you didn’t answer my question,” she said, in thatvoice that left warm trails dancing across her entire body, “am I really theworst?”

“N-no, ‘course not.” Wow, suddenly she couldn’t be more thankfulthat her dad had brought up tea, because her mouth had never been so drybefore. Hands shaking just slightly, she poured herself a cup and downed half ofit. “I was just jokin’ around.”

Her eyes were still fixed on the delicious expanse ofexposed skin however.

Chouchou followed her gaze with sharp, amber eyes, grinwidening when she glanced back up. “Yodo~ where are you looking that’s so interesting?”

“Nowhere!”

She then had the absolute gall to lean forward,framing her chest between her arms. “Oh? You don’t see anything you like?”

This… was too much, even for a joke. Chouchou’s actions werefar too deliberate to be unintentional and too extreme to be a prank – Yodo wasthe one with the mean streak and even she wouldn’t mess with someone’s feelingslike this – was it possible that her best friend’s feelings weren’t entirelyplatonic either?

“Do- do you-” was she actually thinking this? Was sheactually going to ask something so dangerous? There must be somethingvery, very wrong with her. “Do you, maybe, li-”

“Chouchou, is there anything you would like to have fordinner?”

“FUUU-”

“Yodo. Language.”

“-UUUG! I was gonna say fug.”

The look on Gaara’s face suggested that he didn’t believeher for a second, but he let it slide and turned once more to their guest.“Well, Chouchou? You can ask for anything you like.”

Yodo silently fumed as her friend lit up and began mullingover her options. Was he doing this on purpose? He had to be, surely, how elsecould he have such perfectly terrible timing. And Chouchou’s dark, alluring airhad evaporated, leaving behind her usual cheerful self and leaving Yodo towonder if she’d somehow slipped into a dream back there and had just beenbrought crashing back into reality by her dad’s determination to be a goodhost.

And she wasn’t sure if she should be enraged, or grateful.

Eventually, after much thought, Chouchou settled on a porkstew and Gaara was sent away to buy the necessary ingredients. And now that hewas finally out of the picture for at least thirty minutes, Yodo could finallyconfess in peace.

Just as she was taking a slow, steadying breath however,Chouchou opened her own mouth. “So anyways, what was it you were gonna ask?”she asked, chipper and completely innocent, as though the last five minuteshadn’t even happened.

With her cheeks flaming, Yodo stomped over to the plate of snacksand tried to swallow four at once. “Forget it!” she snapped through hermouthful. “The moment’s gone forever.”

A fine, red eyebrow raised, but Chouchou didn’t question heron it, just grabbed some nibbles for herself before they were completely demolished.“Ok then, so what do you wanna talk about? Been on any cool missions lately?”

She took the change of topic with both hands and ran withit, immediately rambling on about how her brothers had nearly ruined their lastdisaster aid assignment.

But an idea had been planted and she wasn’t going to let itgo so easily.

---

Ok, today, she was going to say it. She had a plan, she hada good feeling, this time would be the one.

She had already dragged Chouchou out with her to one of thefew parts of the city with some real greenery – though not her own garden,despite it being prettier, she’d had enough trouble with her dad yesterday; noway was she going through that again – she had spent half the nightlying away coming up with a perfect script and she had buttered Chouchou upwith this morning’s breakfast – she’d gotten up super early just to make atraditional Sunan spread, with a wide range of homemade breads, jams, cheeses,fruits, eggs and soup.

Suna folk did nothing by halves.

And she wasn’t gonna half-ass her confession either.

“It’s really cool you still get so many plants this time ofyear.” Chouchou was idly sniffing at some flowering cacti, her long, brightyellow dress making her stand out, even amongst the colourful flowers. Thelocation was a success, now it was for the important bit.

“Thought you might like it,” she said, waiting until herfriend was fully focused on her before continuing. “Hey, so, there’s somethingI’ve been wanting to talk to you about, something really important-” she hadn’teven got to the scary part and yet she could still feel the sweatrolling down the back of her neck “-see, a couple months ago something changed,I don’t really get it at all, but I-I, I mean you’re- that dress- hey, are youeven listening to me?”

She had to ask, because for the last twenty seconds,Chouchou’s gaze had been very much not on her, instead fixed on a point justabove her shoulder.

It was probably for the best; “I mean you’re that dress,”wasn’t a line likely to win anyone’s heart any time soon, but she how could shebe so distracted when she had put so much effort into making this perfect?

“Uh… why is your brother hiding in the bushes?”

“…What.”

Yodo spun around to glare in the direction that had socaptivated Chouchou’s attention and, indeed Shinki was lurking in theshadows; managing to look even creepier than usual. She tried to radiate asmuch ‘go away now’ energy as possible with her facial expression alone, but heremained unimpressed and unmoving.

She decided to barrel on past it. Sure, maybe her idealconfession scenario wouldn’t involve a family member ominously watching in thedistance, but as long as he stayed far away, he couldn’t possibly ruinanything. “Oooookaaaay, well, as I was saying-”

But her friend didn’t seem to hear her. Chouchou’s gaze wasutterly transfixed, she didn’t even seem able to blink. “…Now he’s giving me athumbs up.”

Right, this conversation could wait, she had a fratricide togo commit.

---

Kankuro’s snickering was a level of obnoxious that she’dnever experienced before.

“C’mon kid, it can’t be that difficult.”

She lifted her head enough to glower at him, then dropped itheavily back against the kitchen table. “You’re one to talk, have you ever eventried to ask someone out?”

He rolled his eyes. “You know I ain’t interested in thatshit, but I’m still better at flirting than you.”

As much as she’d like to disagree with him, she knew he waskind of right. Even if he wasn’t that invested, she had seen him do his thingat enough – otherwise dull – political events, to know that he was more than capableof finding hook-ups. Somehow. She still didn’t understand the appeal at all,but the fact that the only person she’d ever crushed on was a girl maybe explainedit.

She still had her pride to uphold however.

“Fuck off, I’m amazing at flirting!” She smirked whenshe heard the feet bouncing down the stairs, pushing herself out of her seatand slamming both hands down on the table with enough force to rattle the cupson it. “You’ll see, Chouchou’s on her way down and I’m gonna get her to go outwith me, right here, right now!”

Kankuro leaned forwards until their noses were nearlytouching, a wide, sinister grin exposing far too many of his teeth. “Do it then.”

“I. Will.”

Suddenly, Chouchou swept past them, mumbling a low, “Mornin’,”as she opened the fridge and began rooting around in it like she owned theplace. If she had noticed the weird staring contest between uncle and niece throughher grogginess, she had elected not to say anything.

Clearly she had just come from washing up; her hair was slightlydamp and messy curls had yet to be tamed, she hadn’t put on any makeup and she’dthrown on a robe without much thought.

Yodo had never been more attracted to anyone in her entirelife.

“Mornin’.” She glanced over to where Kankuro was waggling hiseyebrows at her, wordlessly daring her to prove him wrong. “Sooo… you got anyplans for today?” she asked, very distracted by the sweet, fruity scent waftingoff of her – a Konoha perfume most likely, Suna ones were generally muskier, withhints of the many spices grown in the region.

Chouchou blinked at her a few times as she took a slow sip ofjuice. “Girl, I’m here to see you, my plans are gonna be the same as yours.”

Out of the corner of her eyes, Yodo could see her uncle withholdinglaughter. She tried to ignore the blush creeping up her neck. “Right, right, duh,must still be half asleep,” she muttered, wonky smile forced upon her lips.

Her attempt at playing it off with a laugh was immediately ruinedby Kankuro blurting out, “You’ve been awake for an hour and a half already.”

She glared at him. He grinned at her.

He was gonna play dirty then, huh? Fine by her, she’d just haveto bring out the big guns, something so irresistible that Chouchou would practicallyfall into her arms before her uncle could ruin it. “So, you… dress good, huh?”

Every eye in the room dropped down to the decidedlyun-glamourous fluffy bathrobe she’d had to borrow from Araya – because Yodostill had to shop in the children’s section to find clothes that didn’tcompletely swamp her and Chouchou was over six foot of pure Woman.

It had a cute little duckling pattern on it.

The dam of Kankuro’s not-very-high restraint finally brokeand he started howling with laughter. “Woooow, smooth!”

“I know right? I’m amazed at how she manages to function ineveryday life,” Chouchou said, not bothering to hide her own amusement as shestarted sharing the story of that time a few years back that Yodo had beentrying so hard to forget about.

Entire body flaming red, she practically leapt out of theroom, yelling behind her as she stormed up the stairs, “You’re both jerks and Ihate you!”

---

She wasn’t sure why Araya had insisted on joining themtoday, they were just doing a little souvenir shopping for Chouchou’s friendsand family back home, hardly something he hadn’t seen before.

Though his presence was at least keeping her somewhatfocused on their task, rather than on how lovely Chouchou looked in that brightblue dress; which was very. Very, very lovely. So lovely that shedesperately wanted to remove it to see how much lovelier she looked underneath.

If this was what being in love felt like, she wondered how humansas a species had ever lasted this long.

Araya casually asked who they were shopping for first,immediately reminding her that she was in public and should really get her mindout of the gutter before she did or said something that would get them thrownout of the market and probably earn them a lecture on the importance ofrepresenting a village from the Kazekage.

To distract herself from her thoughts, she picked up alittle clay figurine, some kind of lion thing. “Inojin would probably like this,right?” It wasn’t exactly like his ink beasts, but it was close enough; he couldprobably do with some new ideas anyways.

Before she got any response from the one she’d actually beenasking however, Araya had leapt upon her, taking the object reverently in hishands and waved it in front of Chouchou’s eyes. “Wow, he’d love it! You’re sogood at this Yodo! Isn’t she amazing?” The smile hidden by his mask wasdefinitely made up for by the pure excitement in his voice.

“Hmm, I guess she’s pretty good, dunno that I’d go as far asamazing though.” Chouchou still took the lion though and wandered over to the stall’sowner to haggle.

Yodo took the opportunity to scrutinise her brother. “What’swith you today?”

“Nothing, at all,” he said, utterly failing to sound like hewasn’t lying – he’d never been very good at it in the first place.

“Mhmm.”

“Really, there’s absolutely nothing going on. C’mon, it lookslike she’s done, let’s go to a food stall next!” Quickly running off to grabChouchou’s hand, he dragged them both off.

And things continued being weird throughout the day; as theybrowsed the market for interesting trinkets and regional delicacies to sendback to Konoha, Araya took every opportunity – and several opportunities thatdidn’t actually exist – to praise Yodo to the high heavens, no matter howtrivial her actions. She normally wouldn’t mind, her ego was big enough that itcould take a little stroking every now and then, but everything about him todaywas just screaming ulterior motive and that could only mean bad thingsfor her.

Araya with a Plot was not someone to mess with and she wasfeeling very twitchy as a result.

So twitchy, that when she heard the slight hitch of breathbehind her, she immediately spun and caught the heavy weight that wasthreatening to fall on her.

It must’ve looked ridiculous, a six-foot-something giant,who was eighty percent leg, being held like a princess by a scrawny, five-foot-on-a-good-dayrunt.

Araya looked up at her and threw his arms around her neck.

“Oh, Yodo, my hero!” He was practically weeping now,catching the attention of more than a few passers-by. “Thank you so much, whoknows what would’ve happened if you hadn’t been here to catch me in yoursurprisingly strong arms! I’m sure you would be an amazing catch for anyone!”

She closed her eyes and counted to ten before dropping hisweight and letting him fall the whole five inches to the ground with a lightthud. Everyone around them looked either confused or amused, as she bent down,grabbed her brother’s ankles and wordlessly dragged him into the nearest dark,abandoned alleyway.

When they were sufficiently alone, she leaned over to glareat where his eyes should be; she might not be able to see his face through themask, but he could certainly see hers. And hopefully he would be rightfullyscared of it. “Ok, seriously, what the fuck.”

“I’m just trying to get Chouchou to see how cool you are, soshe’ll want to go out with you!” he said, arms gesticulating wildly, even as hewas lying on his back.

“What’s that got to do with you? I can take care of thismyself.”

He sighed and slowly pushed himself so he was sittingupright. “Look, I support you one hundred percent in everything – you’re thebest sister in the world – but you’re definitely going to screw this up if weleave you to your own devices, so we all agreed that you needed a hand toactually make this happen.”

“I’d be doing just fine if people didn’t keep distracting me-”she stopped, suddenly thinking back to everything that had happened the lastweek “-wait, we? You’re all in on this?”

“Well, Uncle was mostly just being himself and Dad was justgoing along with what Kankuro told him to do, but me and Shinki at least have yourbest interests at heart! He just thought it might be better to quietly supportyou from the sidelines while I think the more… direct approach would be better.”

Even if she’d wanted to respond to that, she couldn’t findthe words, so she just spun round and stomped out into the street whereChouchou was still waiting for them. “You guys done?”

“Yeah, let’s go.”

The peace lasted for all of five steps before Araya joggedup behind them and leaned down to whisper in Chouchou’s ear. “Yodo’s great, don’tyou think?”

“I can hear you and I don’t need your help,” she ground out,teeth practically cracking with the force of her strained grin. Was he reallyplanning to follow them around until she finally confessed? Sure, she hadn’tsucceeded so far, but she was just waiting for the right time!

She couldn’t see Araya’s expression behind the mask, but sheknew she didn’t like it. “Are you sure about that?”

“Chouchou, let’s go look over there.” Grabbing her friend’shand – and definitely not feeling a little giddy about it – she led her to aclothing stall, already eyeing up a beautiful, deep, ocean blue and gold scarfthat would look amazing against Chouchou’s dark skin.

Araya remained undeterred. “I know she can be very dense,and stubborn, and she’s pretty lazy and her dress sense is… distinctive-”

“This is what you call helping?” she snapped, bristlingat his tone of refined disdain.

Just because he didn’t appreciate her butch, punk fashionchoices, didn’t mean that she was a bad dresser. She was at least above herfather and uncle in the family style rankings. Which was a real thing; Shinki kepta constantly updated list in his desk.

“-but she has somegood qualities too! She’s fun cool and she always loyal to her friends andfamily, I bet she’d be a really great girlfrie-”

As much as she would love to just throttle him right now,she settled for grabbing his shoulders – mostly because she couldn’t actuallyreach his neck – and shaking vigorously until he shut up. “Go. Away. I’ve. Got.This.”

He carefully removed her hands and held them together betweenhis own. “Look you don’t have to do it yourself; it’d be less painful foreveryone if I just said it for you.”

“That ruins the whole point though!”

She could feel the Look, and she hated it. “Are you gonna doit yourself then?”

“I- wha- ye- no-” she looked around for someone to save her,unfortunately most of the civilians had grown bored of the show and returned totheir shopping, the only person still watching was Chouchou herself, gigglingsoftly, with her long hair shimmering in the sunlight. Swallowing a painfullump, she turned back to her brother, saying softly, “Look it’s hard, ok?”

“It doesn’t have to be, just be honest, I know that nothingbad will happen, trust me, you can do it, it’s really not so scary,” he said,tone gradually shifting from soft and encouraging to exasperated and critical, “I’veasked out tons of people before and I don’t get this worked up about it, reallyI thought you were the brave one-”

“God! Fine!” She spun round, pointed directly at her crushand yelled at the top of her voice, “CHOUCHOU YOU LOOK GREAT IN THAT DRESS BUT IT’DLOOK BETTER ON MY BEDROOM FLOOR! Are you happy now?!”

Chouchou stared at her, completely still for a second, then burstout laughing.

Loud, unashamed guffaws probably weren’t the ideal reactionto a pick-up line, but, listening back to her own words in her head, she couldunderstand how they’d gotten there. Still didn’t mean she couldn’t be offendedby it though.

“Hey, quit laughing! I’m tryna be serious here!”

Araya crossed his arms, shaking his head slowly, clearly notfar off of laughing himself. “And that’s the line you chose to be serious with?”

“Ok, you shut up you’re no help at all,” she said, elbowinghim in the stomach before snapping back to her friend, “and Chouchou stoplaughing at a girl when she’s bearing her soul! Can’t even get some respectwhile confessing, honestly…”

Slowly, Chouchou straightened up, wiping a tear from her eyeand pure delight still lighting her voice as she asked, “Yodo, are you sayingthat you like me?”

Fuck, how red was she right now? Had to be pretty bad if theburning of her skin was anything to go by – even the midday Suna sun felt coolby comparison. “Y-yeah, obviously,” she muttered, suddenly all too aware of howmany eyes were upon them again.

“Finally!”

She blinked expressionlessly at Chouchou. “Huh?”

“Girl, I’ve been trying to get you to admit you like me for months,I really thought I had a winner with that ridiculous seduction act when I firstgot here.”

“If you knew then why didn’t you just say something!” shespluttered, defaulting to her usual anger while she was waiting for the joy tokick in.

Amber eyes rolled, but she was still grinning widely. “I’vebeen in love with you since we were kids, I figured I’d let you stew for atleast a little while, get some revenge for you being an oblivious idiot.”Chouchou had liked her for that long? How had she not noticed?

More importantly, however. “Wait, so are we, like… datingnow?”

Closing the distance between them and leaning down, Chouchoustared deep into her eyes, mouth set in a hard line and brows furrowed heavily.“If you say you don’t want to after all this, I will literally throw you intothe middle of a sandstorm,” she said, before her warm smile returned and she lightlypecked her on the cheek.

“Ha, I win!” Araya immediately managed to ruin the momentwith his loud declaration.

Kankuro landed next to them with a thud; Yodo didn’t evensee where he came from. “I call foul! We never agreed that you could get sopersonally involved!”

Family members began appearing out of the aether, until theywere surrounded by her brothers, father and uncle. Her blood pressure shortthrough the roof.

“Exact terms were never agreed upon, it’s your fault forbeing so vague, so you have to pay up.”

Yodo felt all feeling drain from her body. “…Were you allbetting on this?” she asked, voice soft and chilling.

The sudden silence could’ve been cut with a rusty butterknife, it was so thick.

Araya was the first to attempt a response. “N-noooo,definitely not!”

“You just said that you won!”

“Which I’m still not accepting, by the way,” Kankuro cut in,earning twin glares from Yodo and Araya both.

“Ok I’m not surprised by you three-” she glared at her brothersand uncle, who looked varying shades of ‘not especially guilty’ “-but even youwere in on it, papa?” Yes, she was bringing out the big, watery, puppy-dog eyesand no, she didn’t feel bad about it.

“Kankuro said he had a plan to make you very happy and Ididn’t think to question him on it, I can only apologise.”

“My baby bro is a snitch! How could I let this happen, I’vefailed you, my brother…” Kankuro wailed, as though he wasn’t the main bad guyhere; Yodo had absolutely no doubt the whole bet was his idea and she would notbe letting it go unpunished. Though her dad’s look suggested that he wasdefinitely going to be dragging him off later to have a Chat with him first.

A heavy arm dropped across her shoulders and long hairtickled at her cheek as Chouchou leaned down to snicker in her ear. “Yourfamily’s hilarious, I love it.”

She basked in the casual touch of skin against skin anddecided that – if this was the reward – she would happily deal with a thousandmeddling families. “You guys are lucky my girlfriend likes you, else you’d all bedead to me!”

Didn’t have to let them have the satisfaction of knowingthat though.

---

[artlessictoan]

Hi and sorry that it is not butch or femme but what do you think about genderfluid!Sakura? Do you have hcs?

i don’t think i’ve ever considered genderfluid sak before but???? yes????????? this is some quality shit???????????????????????? as thanks for this spiritual awakening, have some off the cuff hcs!

knew fairly early on in life that she didn’t always feel like a girl, but had no way to describe or understand what exactly that meant until naruto began transitioning in school. she was very interested in what being trans meant and would pester him with questions when they were on long missions, he was the first one she told about her own gender confusion

went through a period where he thought he was just a trans guy but still had times where she really wanted to wear cute dresses and do makeovers with ino, after much experimentation with labels and presentations he just decided fuck it and let himself be whoever he was that day

predominantly masc-leaning, with a few fem days a week, feels agender at random times, shifts happen during the day rather than waking up a different gender, but there’s no real schedule to it

it’s usually pretty obvious which gender he is at any one time and he’ll let you know what pronouns he’s using pretty quickly (though they is usually accepted as a compromise), one time for her birthday naruto gets her a double-sided necklace with ‘girl’ on one side and ‘boy’ on the other, so she can just flip it around whenever her gender shifts and she can’t easily change her presentation (eg if she’s at work)

even in fem mode, her style is more futch than femme and she rarely bothers wearing makeup (though she does like buying and hoarding it, just in case)

experiences mild-to-moderate dysphoria when in masc/agender mode, the biggest cause being his breasts, he has top surgery in his twenties, after which the worst of the dysphoria goes away and he’s much happier

[artlessictoan]

Do you have any headcanons of Gaara parenting the kiddos?

absolutely!

gaara has absolutely no idea what he’s doing at any given time, but somehow manages to make it work by a combination of books, getting his friends and family to help and just being such a hopeless, terrified dork that the kids can’t help but warm up to him

he’s strict, but only about very specific things, he’ll cave to their requests to give them sweets in an instant, but will watch them like a hawk to check they’ve brushed their teeth properly, he will demand that table manners be strictly adhered to, but doesn’t see any problem with them playing with actual deadly ninja weapons (if they get hurt at least they’ll learn a lesson from it), make as much noise and mess as you like, but god help you if you swear again yodo..

very rarely gets angry at them though, he’s just got the Deeply Disappointed Dad Face down pat

never really joins in on their games, but he will happily sit off to the side and watch them kick a ball around or play tag and will make sure to bring them juice and snacks and gives Araya pointers on how to defeat his sibs

since he’s pretty much always awake, he’s always right there when one of the kids has a nightmare to calm them down, usually by humming traditional suna hymns and listening to them vent

gaara connects to each of the kids in very different but equally deep ways. shinki he relates to bc of their similar personalties, past trauma and both being autistic, yodo bc they share a deep rage at the world that they have to learn to control, and araya bc he reminds gaara of how he used to be, before the whole yashamaru.. incident....

has to go and stare at a wall for about fifteen hours the first time he’s called ‘dad’

[artlessictoan]

Hi! I Like your headcanons about the Sand family( and team Shinki) and I was wondering if you have any headcanons about team shinki's relationship with Chocho and Inojin. Thank you for your answer!

sure do! they’re all p close since the kids and shikadai are cousins, so they always hang out together whenever one group visits the other’s village, but more specifically:

inojin

gets on well with yodo since they’re both little shits who don’t have anything even resembling a filter, that does lead to arguments sometimes but they’ve got a healthy respect for each other and they’re both really hard to offend, so usually it’s just in that “you’re a bitch” “lol ikr” kinda way, yodo tends to get him in trouble though bc she’s always dragging him into her pranks

him and shinki are a little awkward around each other, since neither one’s great at social interaction and they’re both a lil quiet and distant, but they’re happy to just be around each other and not talk

araya lowkey idolises inojin (not as much as he does shika but p close) ino’s kiiinda uncertain around him at first, since when aya likes someone he can be pretty clingy and loud, and made a few insensitive comments about aya’s appearance at first, but after yodo’s subsequent Talk with him, he came to appreciate how sweet and positive he is and they’re both really into arty stuff so they spend a lot of time talking about that and working on projects together

chouchou

p sure everyone knows about my Deep Unabiding Love for yodochou at this point but yeah i hc that cho has been crushing on yodo since basically the second they met, she’s absolutely convinced that yodo is the single coolest person on the planet and whenever she’s around she’ll basically ignore everyone else. yodo doesn’t have her gay epiphany until her late teens, but even before then she considers cho her best friend outside of her bros, she loves how chill and funny she is and they’re always getting into trouble together, just.... yodochou man.............

she thinks shinki is a bit weird at first, even creepy, but since he’s yodo and aya’s bro she makes an effort to be friendly, it doesn’t always work out bc shin can be a pretentious brat at the best of times, but once they spend more time together they work things out, she does think he’s kinda cool and she’ll sometimes ask to train with him to pick up strategy tips, on shin’s part he thinks that although she can be a bit annoying, his sis is clearly very fond of her and that can only be a good thing (they also like to talk Fashion, even if their styles are quite different)

cho thinks that aya is just the sweetest thing and loves hanging out with him, they get along really well chatting and playing games and doing each other’s hair and makeup, aya is actually the first person to work out cho’s feelings for yodo and he offers to be her wingman/shoulder to moan on when his sis is being an oblivious idiot, she returns the favour by listening to him gush about his various crushes

[artlessictoan]

Do you have any headcanons of the sand sibs 2.0 relationship with Metal Lee?? I love your writing btw!!

daww ta luv! well Everyone Loves Metal anyway, but the kids are all particularly fond of him!

metal and yodo are both similarly energetic and she’s one of the few people actually able to keep up with his training regimes (..the easier ones at least, at some point you really just need the Lee genes to have any hope of surviving) he’s way more responsible than her though and is usually the only one trying to talk her out of mischief

shinki and metal get on surprisingly well, he likes that metal is happy to let him be silent as he very often wishes to be and i also like to hc metal as being hearing impaired to some degree, so they’re both very aware and respectful of each other’s sensory difficulties and metal even teaches shinki some sign language for his totally non-verbal days!

him and aya are just two of the sweetest, most genuine people in the world, so together they’re a perfect storm of positivity and helpfulness, if one of their friends is down they’ll be the ones coming up with ways to cheer them up and they are the heads of himawari’s Tea Party Committee.. they’re unfortunately equally useless when it comes to stage fright though........

[artlessictoan]

Hello! So I saw your headcanon about Shinki being autistic and I was wondering why you headcanon him that way? I'm not trying to sound rude or make it seem like I'm disagreeing because I actually like the headcanon I was just wondering why...

bc i’m a projecting mess and if writers ain’t gonna give me the canon rep i crave then damnit i’m just gonna make it myself.

as for why shinki specifically........ idk really, i’ve always thought of him as autistic even way back when all we knew about him was that he existed dkfgjh! and i tend to hc quiet, withdrawn characters as being on the spectrum automatically cuz that’s what i most relate to, so yeah all of that basically

[artlessictoan]

Kank loves undercover missions because his special interest mixes with his job. Also, my hc is that he founds the potential future traitors/person wanting to hurt his baby kage brother thanks to that. (Gaara is like "you know I have the third eye jutsu, right ?" and Kank is like "BUT I LOVE DOING IT AS MUCH AS I LOVE YOU" so... Gaara smiles et lets him going it)

honestly though.. kank will just take any excuse to act.

“yeah i know we can easily just break in and steal the documents tem, but what if i just pretended to be some crook lookin to buy them?”

“okok, so i could just tell baki to come with me to his surprise party oooooorrrrr i could dress up like an old man and tell him i need his help carrying my groceries home, it’ll be even more surprising!”

“gaara, you don’t get it, i have to go to that boring political party under a false name and with intricate, uncomfortable face-altering make-up, how else am i gonna find out who’s plotting against us???? temari Do Not say eavesdropping please i nEED THIS”

[artlessictoan]

What type of music do you think the sand sibs/sand sibs 2.0 might listen to??

yodo: punk, rock and metal are obviously her faves and she has a comprehensive knowledge of all the various sub-genres therein, but she’s actually got pretty broad tastes and listens to all sorts, including pop, classical, hip-hop, jazz, rap and a not so secret soft spot for pretentious light-weight indie rock. not country or edm though. she has absolutely no time for that bs.

araya: loves anything poppy and upbeat, the kinda thing he can sing into a hairbrush while he dances around his bedroom, though he sometimes likes to borrow his yodo’s more chill instrumental cds too

shinki: much less into music than his sibs, prefers scilence most of the time, but will occasionally listen to electronica, trance, psybient, drone, space music and that weird borderline-unlistenable experimental music when he’s dissociating

[artlessictoan]

Do you have any headcanons of Gaara or Kankuro training with the kids?

well they’re both pretty reluctant to teach them at first, bc they don’t really want to keep the whole child soldier thing the shinobi world has going, but once it becomes clear that shinki needs help controlling his powers so he doesn’t hurt himself or others they soften up a little (yodo and araya only decide to start training to support him), at first it’s just non-offensive stuff, but once the kids decide they actually do wanna become ninja in their mid-late teens they agree to teach them more

gaa spends the most time with shinki since their jutsu are so similar and also bc his taijutsu is absolutely pitiful and that’s what yodo and araya are most interested in quite a lot of their early training is actually just meditation techniques, breathing exercises, learning how to perfectly control tiny particles of iron, before moving on to larger quantities, it’s actually a really enjoyable bonding experience for shinki; he gets to be in a quiet and calm environment and gaa is super understanding when he gets frustrated with himself, promising that he’ll never let shinki accidentally hurt someone

meanwhile kank has his hands full teaching the other two puppetry techniques. araya’s not so bad, he’s a good student who’s very respectful and always tries his best, even if he’s a little uncoordinated and clumsy. but yodo is a terror who questions him at every turn and gets Very annoyed when she doesn’t pick something up immediately. eventually araya takes up sword training under another suna nin (everyone is shocked when he announces it bc he’s such a sweetie, but he honestly just thinks that swords are cool and that’s the only reason) yodo gets the hang of using chakra strings after much coaching, though her preferred technique is just attaching them to her opponent and slamming them around the battlefield rather than “wastin’ time with puppets” (her words), she also develops her enhanced hearing, she gets a little too good at it but eventually gaa gives her the headphones to cancel it out a little

kank also teaches shinki puppetry once he’s got his magnet release locked down, he was always really into mechanics and gaa’s training gave him extremely good chakra control, so he takes to it very quickly

(bonus tema: she teaches all of them a little wind jutsu, shinki and araya in particular are quite good at it, and gives yodo rigorous taijutsu training since she’s the only member of Sand Sibs Classic Flavour who can actually throw a decent punch)

[artlessictoan]

Do you think Gaara is a Total Goth, a jock goth or a goth nerd?

the day gaara is even marginally jock is the day i finally quit naruto. goth nerd all the way.