#non binary cas Cain

[smilesheartshugs]

Gender shenanigans ideas with the bat fam:

Tim and Cas are both enby in the sense that “yeah people put me in this box but I don’t really have another box to go to so might as well be this.”

Jason never felt comfortable in his skin, but it wasn’t until be got dunked in the magical green buff juice. After the rage has cleared up and he’s in an area where he could stop and think he realizes that he may not be a boy. But because of his physique and how necessary he is for crime ally he doesn’t think he can change it. He doesn’t even let himself try out other pronouns. *no he can’t be a girl what are you talking about? Girls can wear the pretty skirts and he can’t*

Dick is gender fluid though usually male or male adjacent. He feels comfortable in his own skin and wears what ever he wants whenever he wants.

Duke was very very young when he found out he was trans and his parents let him transition so you that he just kinda forgets that he’s not cis. No one knows he’s trans but he just genuinely forgets to tell people. He’s been doing his own testosterone for like two years before his parents got jokerized so it kinda just fell through the cracks. He doesn’t feel the need to tell people either he’s just kinda there.

Babs is mtf and confident with her self.

Steph thought she could be enby for a period of time but she’s a cis girly pop. She just doesn’t like being treated like she’s less than and has no interest in “traditional female value” (cough cough misogyny)

Damian is a guy, he has never thought to question his gender. He was told he was a guy since birth so clearly he must be a guy right? Right?? Well he’s obviously not a girl, not that he hates wearing skirts or makeup he’s just not a girl so that means he’s a guy.

[hoziernaturalevents]

Hoziernatural Recs: Rare Pairs

Sign-ups for the 2024 round of the Hoziernatural Multi-Ship Bang are open, and people will soon be working to create a whole new batch of Hoziernatural content! However, for those of you who would like something to read between now and posting, we have some recs to fill that need 💜

Everything listed below is a rare pair, but if you're a person of varied taste, then check out our Wincest, Destiel, and Gen/Character Study rec lists!

Honey, There Is No "Right" Way by @rauko-creates

Beta: @petrichoravellichor

Hozier Song: Someone New

Rating: Teen and Up

Word Count: 10,181

Pairing/s: Balthazar/Castiel, Past Castiel/Dean Winchester, Past Balthazar/Hannah

Warnings: Internalized Acephobia, Internalized Arophobia

Additional Tags: Ace!Castiel, Aro!Balthazar, Demiromantic!Cas, Demisexual!Balthazar, Queer Themes, Fluff and Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Best Friends, Friends to Lovers, Roommates AU, Domestic Fluff, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Sick Character

Summary:

“That’s not how you feel about her.”

“Castiel, that’s not how I’ve ever felt about anyone. This whole…” He waved a hand in the air and propped up against the arm of the couch, “in love business...it’s complete bollocks. If you ask me, people’ve just seen too many blasted movies, got so hopped up on the rush of getting to know someone that they think that's it, that’s love, but it isn’t. Love is…” He glanced down at Castiel. “Love is choosing the person you get on with best, someone you’re able to be mates with and that you find attractive. All this ‘romance’ rubbish is just propaganda.”

Castiel looked at his friend. He thought about the warm feeling that grew inside him when they were together, the way his heart beat just a little faster every time Balthazar was close. “Yes...perhaps you’re right.”

i prayed my mind be good to me by @withthekeyisking-writer

Hozier Song: In the Woods Somewhere

Rating: Mature

Word Count: 4,789

Pairing/s: Lucifer/Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester & Sam Winchester

Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Emotional Manipulation, Coercion, Conditioning, Stockholm Syndrome, Disordered Eating, Suicidal Thoughts, Victim Blaming

Additional Tags: Hallucination Lucifer, Post-Episode 7x15 Repo Man, Episode 7x17 The Born-Again Identity, Lucifer's Cage, Horsemen's Rings, Hurt Sam Winchester, Sam's Cage Trauma, Sleep Deprivation, Groping, Hand Jobs, Anal Sex

Summary:

"You know you want to, Sammy. You know you miss me. You know you should come get me out."

"No. No, that will never happen."

His hallucination hums, looking at him with dark eyes and something almost resembling pity. "Oh, Sam," he says. "Yes, it will."

Mid-Youth Crisis by @sunshine-zenith with art by @rauko-creates

Beta: @rauko-creates

Hozier Song: Jackie and Wilson

Rating: Teen and Up

Word Count: 9,162

Pairing/s: Rowena MacLeod/Mary Winchester, Dean Winchester & Mary Winchester, Castiel & Mary Winchester, Castiel/Dean Winchester, Lily Sunder & Kelly Kline

Warnings: Minor Blood/Injury, References to Past Character Death, Emotional Hurt/Comfort

Additional Tags: Oblivious Mary Winchester, Humor and Fluff, Finding New Love

Summary: Resurrected and thrust into a strange modern world, Mary finds herself frustratingly connecting with a certain red-haired witch. After watching Cas decide to fall to be with her son Dean, Mary starts to wonder: is she happy? WAS she ever happy? Does her chance at happiness happen to lie in an unexpected place?

Someone New by @nickelkeep with art by @deancodedcastielenby

Beta: @iambiowaresbitch

Hozier Song: Someone New

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 11,647

Pairing/s: Cain/Castiel/Benny Lafitte/Dean Winchester

Warnings:No Major Content Warnings

Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Polyamory, Foursome (M/M/M/NB), Non-Binary Character, 5 Times, Explicit Sexual Content, Light BDSM

Summary: Cain has been mourning his wife Colette for two years. Despite the promise he made her, he hasn't attempted to date again. Enter his best friend Crowley with a devious plan to help him find Someone New.

[ogdencollegerp]

CONGRATULATIONS !!!

On behalf of Ogden College, we’re pleased to offer you admission for the next semester. Please complete our new member checklist, and let us know if you need an extension !!! If you were accepted with a secondary FC choice and need to adjust anything about your app, please submit the changes with your account.

SKELETONS

{ KEITH POWERS, 22, CIS MAN, HE/HIM } Is that ALEXANDER RYCROFT? A SENIOR originally from MANHATTAN, NY, they decided to come to Ogden College to study LAW. They’re THE BIG MAN ON CAMPUS, but even they could get blamed for Greer’s disappearance. 

{ EMMA D`ARCY, 24, NON-BINARY, THEY/THEM } Is that AMBROSIA "OZZY" CAINE? A SENIOR originally from LONDON - UK, they decided to come to Ogden College to study ARCHAEOLOGY on an ATHLETIC SCHOLARSHIP. They’re THE COOL LOSER on campus, but even they could get blamed for Greer’s disappearance.

{ ANYA TAYLOR-JOY, 21, CISFEMALE, SHE/HER } Is that JULIETTE HASTINGS-VILLIERS? A SOPHOMORE originally from LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA, they decided to come to Ogden College to study MARKETING. They’re THE WANNABE on campus, but even they could get blamed for Greer’s disappearance. 

ADDITIONAL CHARACTERS

{ BECKY ARMSTRONG, 18, CIS FEMALE, SHE/HER } Is that DAVIKA "DAV" SHINWARA? A SOPHOMORE originally from LOS ANGELES, CA, they decided to come to Ogden College to study FASHION DESIGN & JOURNALISM on an ACADEMIC SCHOLARSHIP. They’re THE ATONER on campus, but even they could get blamed for Greer’s disappearance. 

{ RISH SHAH, 22, AGENDER, THEY/THEM } Is that ODYSSEUS “ODIE” REZA? A SENIOR originally from BROOKLYN, NEW YORK, they decided to come to Ogden College to study ASTROPHYSICS on a FINANCIAL SCHOLARSHIP. They’re THE SLACKER on campus, but even they could get blamed for Greer’s disappearance.

[vortexhq]

greetings from fairewoods, california! we hope you're having a wonderful time, cassandra cain - wayne ( dc comics ), here in our little sanctuary! make sure you read the checklist, and we'll be sending you the discord link through ims! welcome to a land where everyone gets their happy ever after, salina!

{ dc comics ( comics, canon, ca ). gemma chua-tran; they/them; non-binary. } — do you hear that? it sounds like ( you're gonna go far, kid ) by ( the offspring ). i think i heard ( cassandra cain-wayne ) playing this before. have you met them yet? they’re a ( twenty-one ) year old ( tattoo artist ), and they’re usually always hanging around ( fairewoods animal shelter ). they’re known around town for ( their attention to detail and skill when it comes to their tattoo designs ); fitting for them, since they’re so ( empathetic ) yet ( socially awkward ). they’re sort of associated with ( dark circles under your eyes from many sleepless nights, finding a sense of comfort in silence, feeling a great weight on your shoulders from your own guilty conscious ) which makes total sense when you get to know them. i wonder how they’ve been doing lately; last i heard from them, they were telling me about a dream they had? something about ( disappointing their family ), but i’m not sure what they were talking about. they always do tell the strangest stories… // [ salina, 26 / pst, they/she. ]

[basicallyafangirlsworld]

To everyone who’s asking us to stop being ungrateful, to stop complaining and move on, saying it’s done and you can’t change anything.

They maybe just characters to you, but for us they were an integral part of our lives for years. So many people grew up along with them. We’ve been through a lot together over the years, and they feel like family, they feel like home. And as the show preach but don’t follow “Family don’t end in blood”

Please  keep in mind that people greive differently. We are going through a lot of emotions, anger, grief, disbelief, confusion, frustration, disgust. I’m not justifying harassment of cast or crew. We don’t have anyone to blame this on, we are left hundreds of questions,we need answers and the defeaning silence from the cst and crew is alarming.

You are not just silencing some obsessed, overattached stans.

You’re silencing

Everyone of lgbtqia community, people in aro ace spectrum,non binary, neurodivergents, loners, people who are socially anxious, people who are lost in their lives, people who doesn’t have or thrown out of their families who see themselves in Castiel.

Every eldest sibiling who had to grow up early, who had to be both a parent and a kid, people who survived abuse, every queer closeted person, people who love their family, people with self-worth issues who see themselves in Dean

Everyone who struggled with depression, addiction, been through worse in life but still keep hoping, everyone who didn’t find the love and comfort in their family, everyone who found comfort in books and knowledge, straight allies, who see themselves in Sam

Castiel was a stoic loyal soldier of god, who was designed to smite first ask questions later. He rebelled against his own family, stood for what is right, helped save the world. He was lost with no purpose in life, trying to understand humanity, he made mistakes because “too much heart was always Castiel’s problem.” He was mocked, demeaned, hated by his own family, for choosing a lesser species over them. He was broken, reset a hundred times, but it didn’t work because of love. He loved with all his being, found his happiness in expressing his love without even expecting it back. This fallen angel , broken soldier with a crack in his chassis is a symbol of Love and the power it holds.

Dean Winchester’s whole life was filled with grief and loss. He lost his mother, he grew up to be his daddy’s little soldier, he had to take care of Sammy, put everyone ahead himself. His whole life he kept losing people who were close to him.  He found his life and himself worthless.  But still he found happiness in silly little things. This guy who was Micheal’s vessel, a knight of hell, who had the mark of cain was also the same person who owned scooby doo underpants, whose face light up like a kid when he got a slinky. He started to accept himself and that he deserves a happy life too. He lost his best friend, didn’t get chance to express his love but still carried on. He taught us all to continue seeking happiness however sad your life gets.

Similar to Dean’s life Sam’s whole life was sad and hopeless. His parents never loved him, he ran way from his house, hoping to find a proper ordinary life, but that was also taken away. He kept losing people in his life, became a pawn in the celestial chess. His body was violated, he was possessed , tortured, his soul damaged beyond repair. But all this never managed to diminish his hope. Even when everyone was tired, lost hope, he didn’t . He taught us all to keep hoping and living your life.

But ultimately what happened?

Castiel was dragged to the place where he relived his worst nightmares over and over for speaking truth, for expressing love.

Dean was killed off in a stupid accident. People saying that Dean died how he always wanted to be. When a person is suicidal and  feels their life is worthless they want atleast their loved ones to have a good life. Also dean said this in initial seasons, he didn’t believe that good things happened, atleast not in his experience. This turned out true because Dean died afraid, sad, shaking only Sam there to console him.

Even Sam didn’t get to live the “normal apple pie life” because, the most important person in his picture of happy life was missing. He lived his whole life hopeless in guilt and grief waiting for his death.

They didn’t just kill Sam, Dean and Cas. They killed our hope, happiness, love.

They silenced them. Now you people are trying to silence us.

[nox-scrie]

enchantment

Partea a patra si ultima parte din seria lui Jacks. Am stat o groaza sa editez capitolul asta pentru ca simteam ca trebuie sa ii fac justice, si nu cred ca a iesit la fel de bine pe cat ar fi putut sa iasa, insa asa e si Jacks- intr-o crestere continua.

Word Count: 5666 

NISTE TRIGGER WARNING URI EXTREME PENTRU CAPTIOLUL ASTA!!!! O gramada de family abuse, si mental si fizic; nu cititi de la “Esti victima unui farmec, asemanator cu cel de la spectacol. Esti-" pana la "Ce ai patit la fata?" intreba Jacks, si pentru un moment crezu ca o noua iluzie incepe. Chiar nu era gata, si nu stia daca se va abtine din a apasa pe tragaci acum.”  SI replica lui Jacks ce incepe cu “ A fost, nu-i asa?” IT S SOME HEAVY ASS SHIT. Daca chestiile astea nu va fac sa va simtiti bine, va rog aveti grija. Pana si mie, ce le-am scris, mi-au dat greata. 

In rest, sper ca v-a placut experienta primului meu personaj non-binary criminal (ce nu e inspirat dupa un animal de plus), iar aici sunt primele trei parti:

Partea 1 | Partea 2 | Partea 3 | Partea 4

***

Padurile nu ar trebui sa arate asa. Asa... negre. Asa moarte. Asa fara suflu, fara oxigen. Asa fara scop. Era de parca mergeai intr-un spatiu fara viata, de parca ai fi intrat intr-un tub sintetic si tot aerul iti era scos, incet, din plamani. Era o padure pana la urma, locul ce sustine, prin definitie, viata, locul in care poti sa mergi daca nu mai ai unde sa te duci. Locul in care poti sa respiri, dupa ce ti-ai tinut respiratia pentru mult timp. Faptul ca padurea asta corupta exista macar era o crima din mai multe puncte de vedere.

"Nu imi vine sa cred ca m-a pocnit." a zis Syksy (frumoasa grupului, imbracata in piele, iubitoare de caini si cel mai probabil un caine chiar ea) pentru a paisprezecea oara de cand au urcat in trasura si au pornit la drum.

Vår (tanar, si el frumos, la punga gros, incredibil de gay si cel care a construit caleasca asta printr-un pocnet din degete) isi dadu ochii peste cap pentru a paisprezecea oara. "Las-o in pace, Syk. Nu se simtea okay."

"Ei bine, Vår, nici eu nu ma simt okay in majoritatea timpului, si totusi nu iau la bataie primul om ce se uita in directia mea." continua Syksy, incepand sa isi maseze locul de sub ochiul ei unde o vanataie incepea sa se formeze.

Jacks (persoana care a facut vanataia si care era pe cale sa mai faca una daca Syksy nu termina cu dramatismele) isi dadu ochii peste cap, incordandu-si maxilarul si uitandu-se pe fereastra. Ochii sai intunecati erau lipiti de padurea din ce in ce mai moarta, mai neagra, mai absenta. Spera doar sa nu o gaseasca si pe Ea asa.

"Macar stiti unde trebuie sa mergem?" intreba Jacks, intorcandu-se spre cei doi frati.

Adevarul e ca aproape se simtea bine ca a pocnit-o pe Syksy, facand ca doar putin din sarmul natural ce o urmarea sa se fisureze. Cand Syksy zambea, Jacks simtea doar ca ceva e gresit: buzele ei nu sunt rozalii, ci precum niste piersici, iar daca Syksy isi punea mana oriunde pe corpul lui Jacks, era acelasi sentiment ca atunci cand atingeai un strain din greseala in autobuz.Jacks era o cauza mai pierduta in ghearele indragostirii mai rau decat anticipase.

"Eu stiu." ii aminti Vår, si se uita la randul sau pe fereastra. "Dispozitivul pe care l-am facut pentru Syksy merge la fel de bine si pe Kesä, insa nu a mers niciodata pentru Vinter. E de parca Vinter ar fi undeva, ascunsa de pe fata pamantului. Pastrata in siguranta."

Desi Jacks si-a inchis ochii cand Vår a spus numele ei, asta nu insemna ca nu a simtit durerea precum un pumnal ascult infipt in timpanul sau. Vinter. Fata ce i-a furat inima si orice farama de ratiune ar mai fi avut. Ofta si se lasa pe spate in caleasca, deschizandu-si ochii in ciuda impulsului de a ignora tot ce este in jurul sau pana la inevitabila-i pieire. 

"Ne apropiem acum." spuse Syksy, incruntandu-se. Era primul lucru important pe care il zisese, daca nu se luau in considerare remarcile rautacioase aduse cand fratelui ei, cand lui Jacks.

De parca ar fi dat un semnal, trasura incepu sa bazaie, ca si cum ar fi fost bagata in priza. Jacks isi duse imediat mana la brau, unde tinea un pistol incarcat. Nu il folosea niciodata, dar acum se ridica in picioare si era gata sa ii protejeze pe fratii fetei de care s-a indragostit de orice pericol ce avea sa vina.

Nu observa ca podeaua disparea decat atunci cand nu mai statea in picioare, ci cadea jumatate de metru pana pe drumul de tara, cu pietre zgrunturoase si tarana ce ii intra in ochi. Tipa, sau poate ca nu o facu. Stia sigur ca in urmatorul moment cineva ii apuca bratele si cand dechise ochii, Syksy era in fata sa, cu urechile lungi si paroase si ochii de un gri stralucitor, cu nasul alungit... era un lup.

"Jacks. Calmeaza-te. Esti in trasura, esti cu noi. Esti aici, esti aici. Respira cu mine. Inauntru. Afara. Inauntru. Afara. Bine. Esti victima unui farmec, asemanator cu cel de la spectacol. Esti-"

"Esti o dezamagire." a zis o voce din spatele sau, si Jacks se intoarse, frica fiind pictata pe fata sa ca o masca. Iar acolo era el, insangerat si cu rautatea strambandu-i trasaturile, facandu-l sa arate ca un cosmar pe doua picioare.

"Tata?" sopti Jacks, si isi stranse genunchii la piept. "Tata? Nu, lasa ciobul ala jos, tata-"

"Eu si mama ta nu am crescut un copil deviat asa ca tine. Satana a intrat in tine, acum satana trebuie sa iasa. Stai pe loc, demone, daca il ranim atunci o sa iasa..."

Jacks isi ridica mainile facute pumni deasupra capului si tipa, tipa asa de tare incat tipatul deveni urlet si il simtea pana in adancul oaselor, ce i se rupeau incet in zeci de locuri.

"Stai pe loc." ii zicea tatal sau, iar vocea i se auzea chiar langa ureche in timp ce sunetul de oase rupandu-se era un ecou al unui mars funerar. "Femeie, vino si tine-ti progenitura. Nu pot sa fac o taietura buna. Nu pot..."

"JACKS!" tipa cineva peste sunetul de oase si vocea plina de ura a tatalui lui Jacks. "Nu. E. Real. Opreste-te. Opreste-te. Tatal tau nu te-a omorat. Tatal tau nu e real..."

"Taci din gura, poponarule! Nu ai dreptul sa imi vorbesti, sa respiri langa mine. Pleaca de aici pana nu iti bag ciobul asta in cur, si te asigur ca nu o sa iti placa."

"Stop." a soptit Jacks, gatul durandu-i de la tipat. "Stop!" a zis mai tare, cu putere. "STOP!" a strigat acum, si a smuls ciobul din mana tatalui sau, nepasandu-i de durere, dar infigandu-l in gatul lui, cum a mai facut cu ani inainte.

Linistea ce a urmat ii dadu destul curaj lui Jacks incat sa clipeasca de cateva ori, lasand iluzia sa dispara.

Era in caleasca, si Vår statea ingenuncheat in fata sa, aparent tinandu-i incheieturile intr-o stransoare de fier. Jacks isi trase mainile cu un sasait.

"Incerci sa imi rupi mainile?" se rasti Jacks, si Vår se dadu inapoi, lovindu-se de usa calestii. Incepu sa rada atat de tare incat se dadu cu capul de usa.

"Tu incercai sa ma omori cu un pistol infipt in gatul meu acum o secunda." se vaita Vår, aratand spre pistolul aflat langa Jacks si odata cu miscarea observa ca fata ii era ...cumva stearsa, de parca incerca sa focuseze un aparat pe orice punct in afara de chipul lui.

"Ce ai patit la fata?" intreba Jacks, si pentru un moment crezu ca o noua iluzie incepe. Chiar nu era gata, si nu stia daca se va abtine din a apasa pe tragaci acum.

"O masca pentru a bloca influenta lui Kesä. Si Syksy are una.."

"Doar ca nu e o masca, e o forma pe care o iau uneori." se auzi Syksy, cu vocea joasa, si Jacks se intoarse spre ea.

Ura cat de multa surpriza simtise in ultimele zile, iar de data asta, nici macar nu a mai incercat sa isi ascunda surpriza.. Desi o mai vazuse pe Syksy ca aproape un lup inainte, cu urechile lungi, mustati si ochi stralucitori, gheare ascutite si considerabil mai mult par pe mainile si picioarele dezbracate, asta nu insemna ca nu a palit la fata. Jacks reusi totusi sa scape cu un ridicat din sprancene si o inspiratie scurta.

"Esti mai frumoasa decat imi aminteam." ii spuse Jacks dupa o secunda.

"Te-as lovi asa de tare acum, dar sunt o doamna." spuse Syksy ofticata, si urechile imense i se intorceau incet.

"Mai mult un caine." spuse Vår, si isi puse mainile pe fata. "Pe mine m-ai mai batut inainte; nu risc inca o lovitura la chipul meu frumos."

Syksy ii mari in fata, si Jacks se ridica de pe podea si se tranti langa ea. Pentru un moment a vrut sa isi puna capul pe umarul ei, asa ca a facut-o. Poate avea o contuzie. Poate doar simtea nevoia de ceva solid sub corpul sau, de cineva ce putea sa ii distraga atentia de la durerea cicatricilor sale.

"Nu iti lasa balele pe mine." a zis Jacks, si Vår s-a ridicat de pe podea, intorcandu-se cu spatele pentru a nu fi vazut cum radea.

"Nu meriti balele mele." marai Syksy inca o data, dar dupa aia se relaxa si isi trecu o mana prin parul lui Jacks o data, un gest aproape negandit, de parca ar lua un fir de par ratacit de pe haina sa. Poate stia si ea cum e. "Macar suntem siguri ca ne apropiem de Kesä acum. Influenta ei nu mai e asa vizibila acum."

"Ce cuvinte mari, surioara." dadu Vår din cap, insa inainte sa apuce sa mai zica ceva, trasura se opri.

Nimeni nu fu surprins atunci cand Jacks s-a oferit sa fie prima persoana ce coboara din trasura. Pistolul era inca in siguranta la braul sau si avea niste semne de unghii pe podul palmei de la cum si-a strans degetele in pumni, dar in rest era intr-o bucata. 

Locul in care caleasca s-a oprit avea chiar mai putini copaci si mai multe spatii negre pe pamant, unde acestia fusesera inainte, iar un fior trecu peste Jacks. Peisajul apocaliptic facea insa vederea la cabana mult mai usoara: scunda, cu un singur nivel si o intrare intr-o pestera langa, casa de pamant din fata lor nu arata deloc ca cuibul unei vrajitoare, mai degraba ca o coliba a unei batranici neajutorate. 

"Pare ca e liber." a zis tare Jacks, iar Syksy si Vår au coborat. Vår se uita la pestera de parca a vazut o fantoma, insa cand Jacks ridica din sprancene, acesta se incrunta si dadu din cap, de parca nu s-a intamplat nimic.

"Sa speram ca o sa si ramana asa." spuse Vår, dar tonul sau parea a fi o rugaminte, indoiala maro si gretoasa din gura lui.

Au avansat impreuna spre casa si cu un simplu gest cei doi frati s-au decis ca Syksy, ce a prins o privire bantuita precum fratele ei atunci cand a vazut pestera, ar trebui sa fie cea care bate la usa. Vår ramase in spate alaturi de Jacks, si ridica din umeri.

"Syksy mereu a fost apropiata de Kesä. Aveau multe lucruri in comun, si stiu ca lor le-a fost cel mai greu sa se desparta una de alta. Presupun ca nu a trecut niciodata peste: uite, vezi peretii casei?"

"Ce e cu ei?" intreba Jacks, si incepu sa ii studieze. Iar apoi vazu.

O duzina de caini husky, fermecati sa alerge de-alungul paragului casei ca niste umbre, sub un cer plin de stele aprope invizibile. Lui Jacks aproape i se rupse inima in piept cand isi dadu seama de devotamentul pe care il simtea Kesä pentru sora sa.

Apoi isi aminti cum incercase sa ii induca nebunie prin niste farmece ingrozitoare cu un sfert de ora inainte. Se stramba si se uita in alta parte.

Usa s-a deschis atunci la perete, si de peste prag un cap saten, tuns scurt fu rasari de nicaieri. Persoana din usa o lua in brate pe Syksy de parca nu se mai vazusera de zeci de ani de zile, si poate chiar nu o facusera. Era atata fericire pe fata sa ca Jacks isi fixa ochilor asupra mainilor lui Kesä pentru a se asigura ca nu are un cutit ascuns pe undeva.

"Mi-a fost asa de dor de tine, Syk. Mi se parea ca aud o caleasca, dar nu am vrut sa sper..." atunci Kesä isi ridica privirea din umarul lui Syksy, si se uita spre Jacks si Vår. Fara un sunet, i se napusti lui Vår in brate.

"Frate. Mi-a fost asa de dor de tine, nu stiam nimic din ce faceai si..."

Kesä avu ambitia sa inceapa sa planga si Jacks nu se simtea in stare sa accepte rahatul asta. Syksy veni in stanga sa si ii puse o mana pe umar, poate obervand aura sa aprinzandu-se precum un robinet la presiune mare. De data asta insa, atingerea ei nu mai era binevenita.

"Tu esti Kesä?" hotari Jacks sa o ia usor, dar Syksy ii dadu oricum drumul la umar, expresia sa intunecandu-se.

"Da." se intoarse Kesä spre Jacks. Purta o rochie floarala pana la podea si pantofi inalti fara toc, iar un pulover moale ii inconjura umerii largi. "Si tu...?"

"Jacks. Am venit sa aflam de ce ai capturat-o pe Vinter, si sa o luam inapoi daca tot suntem aici."

"Jacks!" se rasti Vår, o mana inca pe dupa umerii lui Kesä, dar apoi isi dadu ochii peste cap. "La naiba, Kesä, are dreptate. Ce s-a intamplat cu tine? De ce ai rapi-o pe soara noastra mai mica?"

Kesä se dadu inapoi, o expresie intunecata trecandu-i peste fata.

"Cred ca ar trebui sa intram inauntru pentru o felie de placinta."

"In niciun caz." spuse Syksy in acelasi timp in care Jacks a zis "Cu siguranta."

Cand si Vår si Syksy s-au intors cu gurile deschise spre Jacks, a ridicat din umeri. "Daca Vinter e acolo o sa ne fie mai usor sa fim deja in casa."

"Poate nu vrei sa zici asta cu Kesä de fata, totusi?" se rasti Vår.

"Mai bine sa stie ce vine de dinainte." ameninta Jacks, si o privi pe Kesä inghitind in sec cu mai mult decat putina satisfactie.

Intrara pe rand in casa, intai Kesä, apoi Vår si urma Jacks, doar ca Syksy ii trase mana.

"Ea are iluziile; iti intra in minte si ia lucruri sau persoane in evenimente specifice, fara sa le dea un context. Iti ia cele mai mari frici, cele mai profunde dorinte, si iti arata exact cum ar putea sa iti vina de hac. Stii cum te pot afecta pe tine, fiind un om. Esti sigura ca-"

"Eu am un pistol. Sa vad cum poate sa ma mai faca sa vad parinti morti cu un glont in cap."

Cu o incuviintare, Syksy intra in casa, facandu-si loc pe langa Jacks. Jacks isi dadu ochii peste cap si o urma, insa doar pasind peste prag simtea ca a facut o mare, mare greseala.

Daca locuinta lui Vinter era ceea pe care Jacks o putea numi acasa doar dintr-o privire, casa lui Kesä era ceea ce putea numi un palat: distant si cu mult mai mult spatiu decat ii era necesar unei singure persoane . Peretii erau reci si din piatra gri, la fel ca podelele, doar ca ele aveau covoare persane peste tot. Canapele de toate culorile erau puse in cercuri in jurul unor mese joase, de lemn rosu. Mai multe semineuri erau lipite pe acelasi zid, iar rafturi lungi de carti cu coperti colorate, legate in piele, pareau sa fie fermecate pentru a-ti sar in ochi.

Surprinzator, acestea pareau singurele lucuri magice din camera asta. O scara de sticla in spirala era postata in partea opusa a incaperii, iar un perete imens cu tablouri avea o usa in mijloc. De sub ea iesea un fum ce mirosea a friptura. Stomacul lui Jacks ii trada foamea, dar tusi atunci cand Kesä se intoarse pentru a se uita in ochii sai.

"Am inteles ca o cautati pe Vinter?" intreba Kesä si arata cu o mana spre jumatate de duzina de canapele inainte sa se aseze chiar ea pe una. Vår se aseza langa ea, iar Syksy si Jacks in fata lor. "A patit ceva?"

"A disparut. Jacks a fost ultima persoana ce a vazut-o, cum a fost rapita de trei figuri cu glugi. Din descrierea ei erau glugi negre cu sigilii violet, ca cele ale discipolilor tai."

Era prima data cand Jacks auzise ca asa erau colorate hainele discipolilor lui Kesä, dar probabil Vår nu a vrut sa creada cu adevarat ca Kesä putea sa fi avut o parte in rapirea surorii lor. Totusi, chiar si la reprezentatia din seara precedenta, ceilalti doi frati si-au dat seama ca farmecele  Kesei erau implicate in poveste... de ce ar fi incercat sa ascunda asta acum?

"Oh, asta e rau. Asta e foarte, foarte rau. Nu pot sa port discutia asta pe stomacul gol; ce ar fi sa mancam ceva inainte?" spuse Kesä, vocea sa ptigaindu-se la ultimele cuvinte.

Ca la un semnal, un sunet distant, ranit, fu auzit. Un strigat obosit, al unei voci obosite de la tipat. Jacks a fost prima persoana care a sarit in picioare, si Vår a urmat imediat. Cu pistolul scos si amenintand in directia lui Kesä, Jacks vorbi.

"Am inteles care e treaba aici. Sunteti patru frati. Sunteti patru stereotipuri. Vår, bogatasul care gandeste rece doar pentru el are de fapt o inima de aur. Syksy, fata efervescenta ce nu isi gaseste locul, dar care e de fapt inteligenta si sincera. Vinter, fiinta fragila si frumoasa, insa care are de fapt un curaj de fier. Si asta te mai lasa pe tine, Kesä. Nu te preface ca esti inimoasa, pentru ca nu ai fost tu cea care a lasat totul balta sa isi caute sora cand a aflat ca a disparut. Nici cea inteligenta, pentru ca te porti de parca nu stim ca tu esti cea care a rapit-o pe Vinter, si o tii captiva pe undeva pe aici, cand tot tu esti cea care ne-a avertizat sa o gasim, sau va fi de rau.”

Nici macar nu respira inainte sa continue, spunand tot ce avea de spus acum cat avea atentia si guruile cascate ale tuturor. “Si niciodata, niciodata, sa nu te gandesti ca arati la fel de bine sau ca ai aceeasi puritate ca Vinter, caci nici daca te-ai naste din nou cu o fata mai draguta si ai lua totul de la inceput nu ai ajunge nici la degetul ei mic. Deci inceteaza cu trucurile. Fa-ti iluziile. Lasa-ne sa o luam pe Vinter, sa te omoram sau sa te capturam pana devii o persoana mai buna, daca esti in stare de asta, si sa mergem naibii acasa."

Tacerea ce se lasa dupa aceea peste cei patru fu asa de profunda, incat Jacks stia ca daca cineva ar fi scapat un ac, ar fi cauzat un cutremur. O voce mica resui sa duca la pierderea concentrarii lui Jacks: se intoarse mai brusc ca atunci cand il vazuse pe tatal sau.

Mama lui Jacks putea fi vazuta prin usa dintre tablouri, acum deschisa, dand spre o camara goala.. in afara de ea. Era legata fedeles de maini si picioare si sangera, cu buzele crapate. Se vedea ca a tipat mult timp si a incercat sa iasa din funiile ce o tineau, caci era transpirata si vizibil obosita.

"Ai venit sa ma iei." a zis mama sa, clipind. "Ti-a luat ceva."

"Nu esti aici de fapt." a zis Jacks simplu, si a indreptat pistolul spre ea. "Esti pe Pamant. Esti in siguranta."

"Serios? Ce-ar fi sa il intrebi pe Vår atunci, cate portaluri spre Pamant exista?" intreba mama sa, lasandu-si capul pe spate, cu oboseala.

"Vår." vorbi Jacks. "Mai exista vreun portal spre Pamant in afara de cel pe care il porti cu tine mereu?"

"Poftim? Jacks, nu, e totul doar o iluzie, sa nu ai incredere in ce vorbeste.." se auzi Vår panicat din spatele sau.

"Asta i-ai zis? Vår, nu, de ce ai mintit-o?" se auzi Syksy, si Jacks isi stranse mana pe psitol pentru a nu se intoarce. "Trebuia sa ii zici adevarul.."

"Dar nu e nevoie de fapt. Oricum nu are cum sa il gaseasca. A fost ingropat in timpul avanlansei. Pestera in care era..." o pauza. Apoi "Rahat, aici e locul, nu-i asa Kesä?"

"Dezleaga-ma, copila. Dezleaga-ma acum, cat nu sunt atenti."

"Nu. Tu nu esti mama mea." a dat Jacks din cap, desi isi simtea inima tot mai mica.

"Ba sunt! Sunt, sunt!! Ai de gand sa ma parasesti din nou?"

"Nu te-am parasit niciodata, mama." se incrunta Jacks, si incepu sa avanseze spre mama sa. "Tu m-ai izgonit, m-ai dat afara din casa."

"A fost o greseala." a zis mama sa in timp ce Jacks se aseza in genunchi in fata ei.

Syksy tipa, insa Jacks nu avu curajul sa se uite la ea. Ochii ii erau prinsi in cei ai ochii mamei sale. Frumoasa, si micuta, ca in ultima zi in care a vazut-o. Aceleasi linii pe fata ei, de la incruntaturi si strambaturi, acum insa invinetite de la plans si insangerate de la tipat. Aceleasi batai ale inimii, pe care Jacks le auzea atunci cand incerca sa se calmeze dupa ce politia a venit, si Jacks a plecat pentru totdeauna din acea casa blestemata.

"A fost, nu-i asa? Ca atunci cand mi-ai zis ca daca ma vei mai vedea, ma vei omori cu mainile mele? Ca atunci cand mi-ai zis ca daca voi indrazni vreodata sa iti vorbesc, ma vei sugruma pana nu voi putea sa scot un alt cuvant vreodata? Sau de te voi atinge, imi vei taia degetele unul cate unul si mi le vei coase invers, ca sa nu ma mai pot apropia de tine vreodata?"

Mama sa a inchis ochii. "Am comis o greseala. Imi pare rau..."

"A fost o greseala. A fost ultima ta greseala, de fapt. Caci apoi ai murit, un atac de cord, inainte ca politia sa ajunga. Iti auzeam inima atunci, mama. Cum tipai la mine in timp ce iti apasai palma de inima, cum mureai.. Si asa vei face din nou." Jacks ii apasa pistolul de piept, si apoi apasa pe tragaci. Glontul zbura printr-un zid de fum, si apoi intra in perete. Prin perete, de fapt.

Jacks sari in picioare si incepu sa fuga spre peretele penetrat de glont. Aparent camera chiar arata asa, goala, intunecata, si incepu sa smulga din perete cu ferocitate. O putea auzi pe Vinter, cum plangea, cum incerca sa dea din picioare. A rupt o bucata imensa de lemn, destul de mare cat sa intre in camera fara lumina prin ea, si isi tinu respiratia inainte sa sara diatanta mica pana la fata legata, insangerata, extenuata.. si incredibil de frumoasa.

Era lipita de un zid, trantita pe o parte. Mainile ii erau legate sub picioare, si o carpa ii era strans legata de gura. Avea un fel de punga transparenta pe cap, ce stralucea vag in intuneric si respira greu si avea ochii mari si minunati, deschisi precum o caprioara prinsa de faruri.

"Nu stiu daca esti o iluzie sau nu." spuse Jacks, punandu-se pe jos pentru a observa nodurile. Avea mainile legate intre ele, dar si sub picioare. Din fericire, stia exact ce trebuia sa faca. "O sa iti dezleg picioarele, apoi mainile de sub picioare. Daca imi dai un picior, te impusc. Daca fugi, te impusc. Daca vrei sa nu te impusc, faci ce zic.”

Jacks se puse pe treaba. Ii desfacu picioarele, iar Vinter le intinse, mormaind cu ochii inchisi. Trebuiau sa fie amortite ca naiba. Apoi, ii desfacu mainile, si le intinse in fata, legate intre ele cum erau. Se ridica, o mana sub umerii ei, si o ridica in picioare. Picioarele ii erau slabe, si pana acum nu incercase sa isi foloseasca puterea telepatica, asa ca Jacks ii desfacu cu o singura mana nodul de la ceafa. Nu ar fi reusit daca nu a mai facut chiar Jacks noduri de genul in anul de cand era aici.

"Daca tipi..."

"Ma impusti, stiu." spuse Vinter, si isi dadu ochii peste cap. Jacks isi simti corpul oprind sa functioneze, si se obliga sa il porneasca muschi cu muschi pentru a o ajuta sa iasa prin gaura din zid. Doamne, ii fusese dor de ea si de vocea ei precum cantecul unei cutiute muzicale.

"Stiam ca o sa ma gasesti." a soptit Vinter in timp ce Jacks ii tinea un picior, punandu-l prin gaura. "Pari genul ala de persoana."

Cu un mormait, Jacks incerca sa ascunda cat de multa flatare simtea in urma complimentului. Pana la urma, inca se putea sa fie o iluzie. "De ce nu iti folosesti puterile? De ce nu ne-ai zis ca esti aici cand am intrat in casa?"

Vinter era acum pe partea cealalta a gaurii, si Jacks intra dupa ea cu gratie. Isi aminti brusc de tipatul lui Syksy, si aproape nu o auzi pe Vinter atunci cand vorbi.

"Chestia pe care o am pe cap. Nu ma lasa sa imi folosesc puterea, este fermecata acolo. Doar cineva ce nu are puteri ar putea sa il scoata... doar ca exact asta ar zice si o iluzie inainte sa te atace, nu-i asa?"

Inainte ca Jacks sa spuna ca da, ar crede asta si ca poate ca nu ar fi asa de rau, Vår, carand o Syksy insangerata, intra in camara.

"Vinter!" tipa el, si Syksy se intoarse incet cu capul spre Jacks si Vinter. Un zambet insangerat ii desena buzele subtiri.

"Poti sa o vezi, drept Vinter?" ceru sa stie Jacks, cu o mana deja pe legaturile de la mainile ei.

"Drept cine altcineva sa o vad?" intreba Vår, si o lasa pe Syksy jos, langa Vinter. "Ah, crezi ca e o iluzie? Nu, nu mai e cazul. Kesä... ei bine, vino sa vezi."

Dupa ce Vår ii dezlega mainile lui Vinter, ii arata drumul pana unde era Kesä, pe podea, cu o punga nu foarte diferita de cea pe care o purta Vinter pe cap.

"Deci e o chestie de vrajitori, sa va opriti unul pe altul cu caciulitele astea?" intreba Jacks, iar Vår zambi.

"Doar pentru cei mai puternici." ii facu el cu ochiul, si atunci intra Vinter in camera, fara punga ce poate arata ca un fes pe cap.

"De ce ai facut asta, Kesä?" ingenunche ea in fata lui Kesä, luandu-i mainile in ale ei.

Kesä o privi, si nimic din sensibilitatea de dinainte nu mai era in privirea ei.

"Vinter, cea sensibila. Vinter cea frumoasa. Vinter, Vinter, Vinter. Toti te iubesc. Toti te admira. Toti vor sa fie ca tine. Tu, cea care nu fuge. Careia nu ii e frica,... I-ar distruge pana si pe cei mai buni dintre noi."

"Si au facut-o." a soptit cu regret Vinter, punandu-i o mana pe obraz o secunda, inainte ca Kesä sa poata sa se departeze. "Stii, dintre toti, pe tine te apreciam cel mai mult. Kesä, cea ambitioasa. Kesä, cea cu un scop. Kesä, cea curajoasa, ce ajuta oamenii de pretutindeni, invatandu-i. Dar acea Kesä e moarta acum, a murit cand ti-ai trimis discipolii dupa mine. A murit cand nu ai vorbit, ci doar ai tacut si te-ai ascuns." Vinter isi inchise ochii atunci, si ii puse o mana pe cap. "Trebuie sa ne dam seama ce sa facem cu tine. Pana atunci... Ingheata."

Kesä se opri din a-si trage din catuse, si ramase cu ochii privind in gol. Jacks simti un fior cand isi dadu seama ca asa aratase cand fusese victima aceleiasi vraji, cu ceea ce pareau ani, dar erau de fapt trei zile, in urma.

Syksy iesi din bucatarie cu ceea ce pareau a fi rosii la conserva si o sticla de vin de tara in cealalta. Se uita la cum o priveau ceilalti si dadu cu nonsalanta din umeri.

"Am fost lovita cu o carte numita "Omoara-i cu blandete". Cred ca merit asta." spuse ea si bau din vin, apoi din conserva. Jacks se incrunta cu dezgust, iar Vinter rase de fata sa.

"Ah!" a facut Vinter, parca amintindu-si ceva. "Eu sunt Vinter." i-a intins ea mana lui Jacks, si Jacks a strans-o cu putere, pentru ca nu isi permisese pana atunci sa se gandeasca cum ar fi cand o sa o gaseasca pe Vinter, ci doar cum sa o gaseasca, iar inceputul unui nou sfarsit ii intuneca judecata si forta cu care trebuia sa ii stranga mana unei domnisoare de care s-a indragostit fara sa ii stie numele.

"Jacks." zambi la ea, iar Vinter zambi inapoi.

"Jacks, draga, trebuie sa iti arat ceva." spuse Vår si pocni din degete in fata sa. "Poti sa te holbezi la sora mea ca la un ciolan de porc si mai tarziu." se stramba el la Vinter, care ii facu un semn obscen in raspuns.

Jacks se ridica, gandindu-se ca poate nu era asa de inocenta pana la urma, si ca poate ii placea mai mult ca nu stia cand acest inceput avea sa se sfarseasca. Il urma pe Vår afara din casa, si nu mai avu energia sa simta ceva atunci cand Vår se opri la intrarea in pestera.

"Avea dreptatea, deci? Chiar e un portal deschis permanent?"

Vår aproba din cap, si se uita la Jacks in timp ce avansa prin pestera, si ofta usor. Parea infrant, parea infricosat. Dar mai mult decat toate astea, parea usurat, asa cum se simtea si Jacks de cand si-a dat seama ca Vinter nu e un farmec.

"L-am deschis cand ne-am dus fiecare pe drumul sau. L-am pus intr-o pestera, pentru ca fiecare dintre noi sa poata sa ajunga la el, si se preseupune ca puteai sa il folosesti doar pentru a calatori intre locuri din acest univers. Syksy a avut niste aventuri pe Pamant; de fapt, ea a mers acolo inaintea mea, si ea a fost cea care mi-a zis de acel loc. Kesä a fermecat portalul pentru a fi deschis exclusiv pentru Pamant, ceea ce contravinea cu planurile mele, ca toti sa il folosim pentru a ne vedea unii pe altii. Asa ca am venit la pestera, si am daramat-o. Am construit o bariera impenetrabila. Nu stiu cum-"

"Te cred." spuse Jacks, si culmea era ca nu simtea ca se mintea. "Kesa e ingrozitoare. Poate ar trebui sa o omoram."

"Nu." spuse simplu Vår, si cand Jacks se uita la el, urmand sa ii insiruie motivele pentru care cea mai mare sora a lui era o fiinta ingrozitoare, se opri brusc. Ochii ii erau negri cu ura. "O sa traiasca. O sa traiasca si o sa vada cat de fericiti suntem, si cat de fericita ar fi putut sa fie si ea daca ar fi vorbit cu noi in loc sa faca ceea ce a facut. O sa traiasca, pentru ca noi sa o omoram incet."

"Esti intunecat, nu-i asa?" intreba Jacks, dupa un moment de pauza. Vår se intoarse spre Jacks si ii zambi, dar Jacks putea acum sa vada maleficul ascuns de dintii lui drepti. Chiar nu ar trebui sa creada ca il cunoaste pe oricare membru din familia asta.

"Tu ai fost cea care a zis ca sunt rational, dar rece. cand am un scop." ridica Vår din umeri, si Jacks il lovi in umar, nu fara bunatate.

"Am exagerat pentru efectul dramatic."

"Jacks, esti o fiinta imposibila. Ascunzi cruzimea in spatele unui umor usturator si traumele in fata unui comportament distant, aproape profesional. As vrea sa te cunosc, dar cred ca e imposibil."

"De ce?"

"Pentru ca nici tu nu stii cine esti.Oricum, am ajuns la poarta."

Si chiar au ajuns. Era ca cea deschisa in bar, o usa intr-un perete, dar in loc sa dea spre blocul lui Jacks, arata doar negru, un fum gros, aproape solid. Jacks inainta si isi puse incet mana pe suprafata neagra, si imaginea proiecta apartamentul sau: spatiul mic, cu o canapea extensibila alba, biroul de lucru pe care avea un laptop si o agenda neagra, identica cu cea pe care o cara tot timpul dupa sine, ca cea cu care venise in aceasta lume.

"Presupun ca deja m-au dat disparuta si au renuntat la cautari de cand am plecat." spuse Jacks, fara sa lase emotia sa i se strecoare in glas.

"Asta poate fi rezolvat cu cateva farmece, si stii foarte bine."

"Da, presupun ca stiu." spuse Jacks, si chiar stia. Stia ca daca era acum o persoana disparuta probabil ca toate posesiunile s-au dus la matusa sa.

 Ea a avut grija de Jacks de la saisprezece ani, de cand s-a aparat de furia tatalui sau omorandu-l, de cand mama sa a facut un atac de cord, de atunci pana la douazeci si unu, dupa ce a terminat Facultatea de Informatica si si-a luat chiar apartamentul pe care il vedea prin usa deschisa. 

Stia ca probabil apartamentul fusese deja inchiriat sau vandut altcuiva, in cazul in care matusa sa nu il pastrase pentru intoarcerea lui Jacks, ceea ce mai mult ca sigur nu a facut. Matusa sa avea multa nevoie de bani, Jacks deja impartind jumatate din salariul sau imens cu ea. Daca s-ar fi inrors, nu doar ca arr fi trebuit sa ii dea pe oamenii care probaibil s-au mutat acolo afara, prin magie, dar sa ii si alterneze amintirile singurei sale rude de sange pe care o iubeste. 

Stia insa ca nu asta era ceea ce facea situatia asa deranjanta.

"Crezi ca Vinter ar veni cu mine?"

Vår a ridicat dintr-un umar. "Presupun ca e o singura modalitate sa aflam."

Criminalul-informatician facu un pas in spate, si isi lasa mana jos. Portalul redeveni negru. "Presupun ca da."

Au iesit impreuna din pestera, si Vinter ii astepta la intrarea in pestera. Il imbratisa pe fratele ei, iar apoi se aseza langa Jacks. Jacks isi dori sa ii ia mana, apoi isi dori sa nu mai simta dragostea asa puternic.

"Nu am vrut sa intru dupa voi. Inainte sa veniti, acolo m-a tinut. In intuneric. Singura. La limita dintre trezire si somn, la limita nebuniei."

"Cum ai supravietuit?" glumi Vår, dar niciunul dintre ei nu credea de fapt ca glumeste.

"Am avut o lumina care sa ma tina pe linia de plutire." rapsuse Vinter, si ii lua mana lui Jacks, sarutandu-i incheieturile degetelor. "Si nu am de gand sa mai traiesc in intuneric de acum incolo." continua Vinter, de data asta in mintea lui Jacks. Inima i s-a strans, si gandul ca “poate nu era asa rau sa simti” ii trecu fulgerator prin creier.

In acea noapte, Jacks a murit. Din cenusa sa a inviat o persoana ce putea sa iubeasca, o persoana iubita de parca era un obiect pretios, fragil. Din cenusa sa, a rasarit fericirea solida, sub un cer cu stele si o luna coplesitor de magnifica.

Nu, ii gandi lui Vinter, nici Jacks nu avea sa lase lumina sa se ii scape printre degete.

[purplezombietumbler]

SPN Characters LGBTQ+ Headcanons

Dean:

Loves Men and Women.

He's gender is male.

He's not sexual attracted to non binary or transgender people, but it doesn't mean he hates them, just not attracted to them.

Dean is in a relationship with Castiel but has sex with other people.

Sam:

Zir gender is neither male and female.

Ze loves men.

Ze is currently dating Gabriel.

Ze is a hermaphrodite. He can have children.

Gabriel:

Gabriel is pansexual and doesn't care about gender or sexuality (as long as there attracted to him).

If there legal, he'll go for them.

Sam is the only non-binary person Gabriel has ever dated. 

He's dated gay males, straight females, transgender males, transgender females, genderfluid people but never non binary and it took him a while to get used to the Ze/Zer pronouns.

Castiel:

Castiel is male and isn't sexually attracted to anyone. 

Cas is in a relationship with Dean.

He doesn't mind that Dean has sex with others as long as Dean doesn't genuinely love them. ​​​​​​​

Bobby:

Bobby loves anyone who he has a personal connection with.

If you're a hunter? He'll attached to them. Love beer? He'll attracted to them.

The connection doesn't needed to be too deep for him to be attached to anyone.

Gender isn't a factor for weather he is or isn't attracted to someone.

Bobby's in a relationship with Crowley.

Crowley:

Crowley was born female but transitioned to male when he was an adult.

Crowley is usually masculine but isn't afraid be a little feminine at some points.

He used to be in a relationship with Cain but Cain broke up when Crowley came out.

Crowley has anxiety about coming out to people because of that situation.

He's currently in a relationship with Bobby, who doesn't care if he's transgender or not.

Lucifer:

Lucifer is a gay boi.

He's not attracted non binary masculine people, or transgender males. He has no hatred towards anyone because of there gender, sexuality, or race.

Of course, he can hate you for everything else.

Balthazar:

Balthazar is genderfluid and attracted to females.

He's usually either male or female but rarely is he both or neither.

He has customized necklaces that are blue for male and has he/him pronouns, pink for female with she/her pronouns, purple for both and Ze/Zir pronouns, and black for neither with they/them pronouns.

He'll usually switch every other week between genders, sometimes earlier or later depending on how depressed or stressed he is. His "default" gender identity is male.

He describes himself as being 70% male, 20% female, 5% both and 5% neither. ​​​​​​​

Claire:

Claire's gender is female

Claire is a lesbian.

She loves women, usually gose for the older ones.

Rowena:

Rowena is a bisexual female. 

Although she likes males and females, she dose lean more twords men.

She likes males 80% of the time and females 20%.

She is also polyamorous and perfers relashiships with more than one person.

[ourpieceoutoftime-blog]

Castiel

Stats

Full Name: Castiel “Cas”

Species: Angel

Age Range: Unknown (over a few billion years old, roughly)

Place of Birth Creation: Heaven

Gender: Non-Binary

Vessel’s Sex: Male 

Pronouns: He/Him/His They/Them/Their’s

Hair: Dark Brown

Eyes: Blue

Height: 5.11" (1.8 m)

Father / Creator: God “Chuck"️

“Siblings”: Angels

Children: None️ (verse dependant)

Occupation: Former Soldier of the Host of Heaven, Hunter

Orientation: Bisexual

Relationship Status: Single (verse dependant)

Faceclaim: Misha Collins

Links

Open Starters

Tags

Headcanons

Ships

Verses

Personality

Castiel’s personality has evolved quite a bit since his first meeting with Dean Winchester. The more he helped the human and his brother, the more time he spent with them, the more human he himself became, in a metaphorical sense.

During the beginning, Castiel was quite cold. He was a very one-track kind of thinker where if he didn’t get 100% what he wanted, he might as well have gotten 0% of what he wanted. He listened to all orders given to him without question, doubt, or hesitancy. He had the utmost trust in his superiors and in Heaven to the point of almost not seeing all of the flaws in what they did or said. He was a diligent soldier who believed just a bit too much in his side of the “fight”, making him bigheaded, a bit full of himself, and quite sassy and short with those who did not see his significant power as he did.

But, all of those “negative” traits evened out as the days with the Winchesters turned to weeks, months, and years. Cas learned to see their side and to understand it. He’d listen and eventually learned to do as the humans did; think for himself. Of course, he’d always been capable of such a thing but had always thought it unneeded, relying instead on the older Angels to guide him and tell him what to do, thinking and feeling not really of import to their missions. But he did have his own thoughts and his own feelings. There were things he didn’t want to do despite Heaven telling him to do just that. He refused, and thus, started to become his own person.

He retained his loyalty but no longer to those in the wrong simply because they called themselves “family”. Castiel fought for what was right, and at first, that seemed to be the Winchesters Vs. Heaven. That changed as Time went on, however. He became patient although not with an ever-lasting temperament. He did have a line, as most if not all beings did. He became loving, developing the new feeling for his new family. His Angelic power stayed the same, but in taking the time to understand and get to know humans, Cas learned that they too had their own powers sometimes even suppressing his own. No one being was better than another because they could simply do something better than the other. It was the type of person someone was, what they did, their actions, their feelings, thoughts, and their passions that defined them.

About

A.N: My versions of Sam, Dean, and Cas are canon divergent. They exist in a world where most if not all events from the Mark of Cain storyline and on did NOT happen! Cas is still and always has been an angel (except when he THOUGHT he was human coming back from Purgatory), the other angels didn’t fall, and Gabriel wasn’t really killed by Lucifer.

Billions of years before there were humans on Earth, God created Angels. It started with Michael, Lucifer, Raphael, and Gabriel; the Archangels. They were said to be one of God’s first creations. He soon created more celestial beings of light, they were his children and were responsible for maintaining Heaven and guarding the souls of the righteous humans there. The jobs and duties of the common Angel evolved as the humans on Earth did and as Time went on. They were given the objective of keeping order, in a sense, and thus, Heaven’s “army”; the Host of Heaven (or Holy Hosts) were created.

The Host of Heaven operated in garrisons; a unit or division. Each did as was told of them and had their own affairs and assignments given to them as to keep Heaven and humans safe. All Angels did their part in one way or another. Sometimes, there would be things on Earth that needed to be handled or dealt with, and so, an Angel would choose a human vessel.

Angels can not appear in their true forms on Earth as the sheer power they radiated, as well as the light, would not only blind all humans but also burn them from the inside out. Seeing an Angel’s true form can cause severe and permanent damage to a human, and so the possession of a human vessel is needed when an Angel walks on Earth. With permission from the host, an Angel can take control of any human and use their body as if their own. 

It was not a common occurrence for an Angel to spend prolonged Time on Earth, some never did and thus would never take a human vessel. However, certain things or events throughout creation required their stepping in. In 2003, a righteous soul meant for Heaven was taken instead to Hell, and Angels stepped in.

Castiel was the new leader of that particular garrison, having been given the position of leader when his former superior (who would later go by Anna Milton) fell from Heaven 2,000 years prior. For all those years, his garrison’s duty was to watch over humanity, which they did with no news or word from their superiors or God. They did as they were told and never questioned it. 4 months after Dean Winchester went to Hell, Castiel’s garrison was assigned with the task of retrieving the man’s soul placing it again within his body so that he may rise and continue to do Heaven’s work.

Down in Hell, as the Angels searched for him, the Righteous Man’s soul stood out so prominently and brightly to the garrison’s leader. Castiel pushed through all of the demonic beings he must to get to that shining light almost becoming in captivated by it. He was the one who gripped the man tight and raised him from perdition. The Angel then screamed, a call sent across the whole universe to all other Angels and said so loudly that not a single Angel could help but to hear it. Dean Winchester is saved.

Angels never questioned anything they were told to do, relying on the knowledge and wisdom of their superiors; the Angels created before them, to guide them. No one Angel will ever or was ever created to know everything, only God did. If something was ever seen as “weird” or “didn’t add up” to a younger being, their older “brothers” and “sisters” would surely know. It was not their place to question anything, nor was it their place to know why every time they may, in fact, wonder. Castiel had always been like that, always relied on the insight he believed his superiors possessed. If he did not know, he was not meant to know and or didn’t need to. But, that day Dean Winchester was saved, a small part of Castiel wondered, for the very first time, why it was 4 months after he was pulled to Hell that they’d been given the assignment to save him. Why hadn’t they been told to act sooner?

However, his small and brief curiosity did not matter and was never voiced as it was not his place to ask or even wonder what he did. The thought was pushed aside as he and his garrison went back to their posts as watchers.

Castiel had been given a specific assignment next, taking him away from his garrison. As the Righteous Man kept up his attempts to contact the being who saved him from Hell, Castiel was ordered to guide him through the various tasks he was meant to go through on Heaven’s word. And so, the Angel chose a human vessel.

James “Jimmy” Novak was a devout Christian who prayed for years to assist the Lord. Each Angel in Heaven was created differently, as were humans. Some human vessels would not work for some Angels, the presence of them inside of the body slowly burning them from the inside out, while other humans were perfect for the correct Angel. This was called a true vessel, and Jimmy Novak was Castiel’s.

It didn’t take much persuasion to have Jimmy say ‘yes’ to him, the human all too willing and happy to help Heaven and their fight in any way he could, despite it meaning leaving behind his wife and young daughter. At the time, this didn’t phase the Angel, nor did he think of the effects Jimmy’s sudden and prolonged absence would have on the two. He had a job to do and taking care of this ordinary, small family of humans was not it.

Castiel appeared to Dean Winchester answering some, but not all, of the man’s questions. He at least told him all he could and was allowed to. It was the start of the two’s connection and journey together. Something about Dean’s soul seemed to have a pull on Castiel’s very being. Beyond it now being his sole “job” to guide the human, when Dean called or prayed, Castiel came. He was soon given the shortened nickname of “Cas” by the human.

Cas became closer and closer with Dean and by connection the man’s younger brother, Sam. The two were hunters, fighting against the supernatural “bad guys” that walked the Earth alongside humans. Unbeknownst to their new Angel friend, Sam and Dean had been created through Heaven’s interference and were the true vessels of the Archangels Lucifer and Michael (respectively). Cas hadn’t known this when he first started with his new orders from the Host of Heaven.

The Host of Heaven saw how the garrison leader’s relationship with the human brothers grew, specifically his attachment to Dean. At first, Cas had concluded their connection to be from the human’s resurrection, having saved him by pulling his soul from the deep parts of Hell. It had been Castiel specifically who had saved Dean, after all, surely the Host of Heaven would have known to expect the outcome. But, their bond exceeded more than that.

Both Dean and Sam taught Castiel things he hadn’t even thought of in the many, many years he’d been alive. They showed him what it was like and meant to be human, and what effects Heaven’s work really had on them. Sam and Dean fought every day to save and help people they did not know, and not because they were told to, but because they chose to. They may not have chosen the life of a hunter themselves, but they had free will in all they did, a concept not quite “popular” within Heaven’s many garrisons. It was foreign to the Angel as, at first, he did not understand why they would ever want or “choose” to go against Heaven’s wishes; the thought of “choosing” to say no and go against orders was something that had never even come into his own mind before. It was a very human thing, free will, but they were, of course, human. And, they seemed happy enough in their lives. Maybe it wasn’t such a bad thing as some of his superiors would present it as…

Castiel was demoted from his position as leader of his garrison, the next Angel under him, Uriel, receiving his “promotion” instead. The Angel still did his job though, but not because the Host of Heaven told him too, but because he wanted to help the brothers the act in of itself feeling correct, in a sense.

The Angel evolved as he spent more and more time with and helping the Winchesters. They were to be pawns in Heaven’s fight against the upcoming Apocalypse, acting as the vessels for God’s “firstborns”; Michael and Lucifer. Castiel could no longer see the humans as simple pawns after getting to know them, nor was it any longer right, in his eyes, for Heaven to decide for them what they will and must do. He sided with the Winchesters and teamed up with them in their first fight to stop an upcoming apocalypse, abandoning and fighting against his own brothers” and sisters; the other Angels and even Archangels.

Years and years on Earth passed and ‘Team Free Will’, as they called themselves, fighting for their own rights to chose what they did with their lives and why (going against Heaven’s say-so), grew and changed. Castiel, the Winchesters, and so many countless hunters joined their right against the supernatural and sometimes Heaven as well. There was a select few Angels who’d agreed with them, helping their side of the fight against their own, but as an overall, Castiel was on the opposite side of his home.

A lot happened to them as fights ended, changed, started up again, and evolved. There was always another fight. Damage was done to Heaven and its Angels; countless Angels were killed by Castiel’s blade as he fought against them. He harmed them all and created wounds that would take years to heal. There was a time when it all caught up to him, all of the things he’d done in he and the human’s fight for free will. He’d chosen them; chosen Dean time and time again over all of the Angels and all of Heaven; over his brothers, sisters, his Home, and his family. He couldn’t bear to go back fearing the sight of what he’d done would push him to a suicide. But, Time healed all wounds, and Angels naturally lived for a very, very long time. Things got better as more and more Angels started to understand where Team Free Will’s fight was coming from and why. They evolved as they had before and would again.

Cas joining Sam and Dean eventually led to the boys discovering the Men of Letters Bunker. The Men of Letters were a secret organization of scholars who researched the supernatural, giving the needed information to hunters who could then do their work for them. They had long since been whipped out, killed by the Knight of Hell Abaddon. One of its members, Henry Winchester, had a single son when he “died”. The young boy would go on to become Sam and Dean’s father, making them the sole inheritors of the bunker. They quickly accepted the place as their new, permanent home. Cas was given a place to stay there as well, although his bedroom would never be used as Angels did not require sleep to rest as humans did.

Much more would happen to the Angel during his time with the Winchesters including he and Dean’s trip to purgatory, and Cas then thinking he was human upon his return (forgetting he was an Angel. At the end of the day, despite all of the bad or hard times they would go through, Castiel stayed by their side and stayed on their side. They were his family, and he planned to be with them for the rest of their lives until he’d eventually see them again when they went to Heaven.